#god I could go on forever about how much I loved this movie
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spacedoutstrawberry · 3 months ago
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*HIGH PITCHED SCREECHING*
I SAW THE MOVIE AND I LOVED IT SO MUCH
(Spoilers below the cut)
just (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) god the feelingsssss eughhhhaaghhhhhhhblkjlb the amount of times Orion looked *so hurt* and in sheer disbelief that his best friend could be doing these things ヽ(;▽;)ノ help it hurts so much.
ALSO ALSO the worldbuilding?? I was so freaking happy to see some cybertronian fauna and flora and the way the planet transformed with sunrise was just *perfection*, I LIVE for that kinda stuff.
I hope they do more cause I’m was genuinely so in love with what they’ve done so far <3
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starkwlkr · 5 months ago
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happy life, happy wife | hugh jackman
an: “you attract what you fear” GUYS IM SO SCARED OF A 55 YEAR OLD AUSTRALIAN 😭 definitely thinking about making marvel actress!reader x hugh an actual series… i have ideas
marvel actress!reader
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Deadpool & Wolverine Press tour - Hot Ones
Hugh felt like he was going to die. Each wing was getting hotter and hotter, but immediately when he heard his wife’s name he forgot all about the spice.
“Hugh, your wife is part of the Avengers, how does it feel having your wife be part of such a huge franchise? Have you two talked about a potential team up with the X-men and the Avengers?” Sean asked.
“My wife . . . Oh god, I think I’m crying-”
“I can’t tell if you’re legitimately dying or completely in love with your wife.” Ryan told Hugh.
“Wait . . I am completely in love with my wife and I would legitimately die for her.” Hugh gasped as he rearranged Ryan’s words.
“Is that in the contract she made you sign when you married her? ‘I vow to die for you’. My contract said I had to give all my money to my kids and wife.” Ryan said.
“No, she’s amazing, um, if I start talking about her I think I might go on for hours,” he laughed. “Our kids do want to see their parents fighting the bad guys together. We would love to team up, maybe it could happen.” Hugh smiled.
“The entire movie would be them making out and her beating the shit out of you. I’d pay to see that.” Ryan added.
•••
Comic Con 2024
Like RDJ, your last Marvel movie had been Avengers: Endgame. After being in ten mcu films, it was time to say goodbye to your character.
But that was in 2019.
At this years comic con, you were back. The cast of Deadpool & Wolverine had taken the stage and showed their appreciation for the fans. After their panel, it was time to announce Marvel’s upcoming projects. Kevin Feige announced the Fantastic Four, Thunderbolts, Captain America 4, and finally the new Avengers movies, which everyone was extremely excited about.
After showing the title card for the upcoming Avengers film, Kevin turned to the audience.
“Something people have been asking, as of late, is who the heck is going to direct these two movies?” The audience clapped.
From the side of the stage, you were nervous. What if the fans didn’t like the idea of you directing the next two Avengers films? Your worrying caused Hugh to come to your rescue.
“Hey, they loved you as an Avenger, they will love you even more.” Hugh kissed your forehead. “If anyone says anything about this decision, they have me to deal with.”
You laughed at his words. “I really love you so much.”
“Love you too, bub.” Hugh was about to kiss you when Ryan cut in.
“I really love us too. I convinced half of the people here that we’re a throuple.” He said in the most serious tone ever.
Kevin announced you as the director. Your doubt of the fans not liking the announcement was proven wrong when you walked the stairs to the stage and stood next to Kevin. They cheered when they saw you were back.
As you said a few words, thanking Marvel, Kevin and the fans, you were being recorded by Hugh, who was being recorded by Ryan.
“That’s my wife!” Hugh cheered from backstage, holding his phone in his hand.
“She’s Marvel Jesus now, holy shit!”
•••
WIRED autocomplete interview
“Is Hugh Jackman married?”
“Yes, to me, Y/n, probably to half the population,” Ryan answered. “He’s Australia’s biggest slut.”
“All the times, I proposed.” Hugh laughed. “But yes, I am married and I love my wife very much. She’s stuck with me forever.” He lifted his hand to show off the wedding band.
“Funny, because she texted me right now. Her and Blake are in the courthouse getting married. So Deadpool three was actually made so our wives could divorce us and marry each other.”
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hana-no-seiiki · 6 months ago
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YANDERE HUSBAND x GN CELEBRITY!READER
— based off of a dream i had of a childhood friend/crush. hiatus not over tho lol.
— morally bankrupt reader. clingy husband. the usual yandere stuff.
YANDERE! HUSBAND who was your childhood best friend. Your parents shipped you two since you could speak.
YANDERE! HUSBAND who had a crush on you since forever. He doesn’t even remember a time where he didn’t get butterflies and an aching need to be the only one close to you
YANDERE! HUSBAND who’s the biggest flirt. He knows you the best. Although you were completely oblivious. He’d always try to be around you, compliment you, tease you.
He’d give you matching keychains, and would beg his parents to buy whatever gift he’d think you’d like.
YANDERE! HUSBAND who sadly had to move away for a while. He comes back during high school. And the first thing he asks while he’s there? To be put in the same class as you.
Now that you two are older, you finally started to notice how much of a tease he was. Always grappling unto a piece of your attention.
You acquiesce and begin to date him. Not necessarily feeling anything for the guy but thought it was high time that you finally settle down. It was the perfect storyline you could share once your ambitions were fulfilled.
That and cause your parents would only let you go to acting school if he married you.
Which you two eventually did before college. Was it rushed? Definitely. Did you even love the guy? Nuh uh. But you had places you had your sights set on. And he was the only path.
YANDERE! HUSBAND who drops out to be your full time househubby. His parents could always give him a job at their corporation anyways. There was no real pressure for him to study and get a job.
YANDERE! HUSBAND who almost always supports your acting career. Watching all your shows, movies, and interviews. Basically buying out all the merch you featured in. And paying advertisers across the globe to have your face plastered everywhere.
YANDERE! HUSBAND who unfortunately stops you from having any romantic or sexual scenes. Essentially blocking you from any roles that could be your breakthrough just cause it could have a tiny kiss or so.
Your anger at his blatant attempt to have control over you began simmering. Ever so slowly reaching the surface. Not improving at all when you found out he’d been trying out a job that his mother gave him.
Fuck the gifts. Fuck the yachts and cars he’d swarm you with. Why did he get to do what he wanted and you didn’t?
So you follow him to work once, only to catch him in a compromising position with a coworker.
You didn’t care about him or his business beneath the sheets really. So you had to thank the gods above that you knew exactly what and how to do the following act.
Cry. Scream. Throw things at them.
The coworker already left. Shuffling as they tried to hide from your anger.
Your husband is unresponsive. Catatonic. Even more of an excuse to hurt him.
You call him filthy, uncaring, the worst man to ever exist. Hell, even some of your true feelings come out as you yelled about how you regretted ever being with him.
You find out later from his mom that he had been framed. That this coworker was just trying to get money out of the heir.
Still, you wanted out. He had already served his purpose and you needed to expand your horizons.
A week later of radio silence from him as you prepared the divorce papers he walks in.
Covered in red his hands caressed your face,
“You called me filthy did you not? So I cleansed myself with their blood.”
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themultifanshipper · 3 months ago
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Do you think you could do something like this
https://www.tumblr.com/themultifanshipper/759431110157631488/quiet-innocent-reader-x-lando-like-lando-finds
Maybe with Oscar ( love your writing)
If Oscar had to describe your sex life in one word : Vanilla.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that! God knows how much the two of you enjoyed the sex you had. You weren’t very experienced when you met Oscar, and you were quite a shy person.
Which is why Oscar was so shocked when he found what appeared to be a list of your kinks just sitting there when he got up to make his morning coffee.
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Fun fact, this request was sent over a month ago, and i only have a couple more to do before i can get to my own stuff lmao
Warnings: innocent reader, Smut, PinV sex, rough sex, dirty talk, mention of lots of kinks n stuff
Part 2
He hadn’t meant to get a glimpse into the inner workings of your sexual psyche, but really, who leaves something like that on the kitchen counter???
As he read it over and over again, his cock twitched in interest and got progressively harder until he put it down, the words seared onto his brain forever.
He tried to have a cold shower but just ended up jerking off furiously to completion imagining doing all the things from your list.
But as soon as he got out of the shower and dried off, he realized he was still achingly hard. He decided to put on a pair of his loosest joggers and go about his day while he waited for you to come back from work.
It wasn’t easy, but he managed to answer a whole two emails, internally debating the moral implications of communicating with his bosses while sporting an erection.
Then he jerked off again.
It did take the edge off for a bit, but every time he thought about it during the day he couldn’t help but fist his cock at the thought of all your filthy fantasies.
When you got home, you didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary, and you did your usual routine: shower, skincare, dinner with a glass of wine, followed by watching something with Oscar, the two of you huddled up together on the couch.
That’s when you started noticing Oscar’s behaviour.
It was very subtle, but you could tell he wasn’t at all focused on the movie, periodically fidgeting around uncharacteristically. Oscar was usually very settled, and tonight it was like he couldn’t keep still for more than 30 seconds. You also noticed his breathing was irregular, often getting shallower as he fidgeted.
Oscar couldn’t care less about what was happening on the screen, his brain was focused on the same thing it had been all day, that damn list.
And he’d been hard all day, which certainly didn’t help his internal crisis.
“Oscar” you sighed, pausing the movie “Talk to me, tell me what’s going on with you tonight”
“Nothing’s wrong, why would there be something wrong?” his mouth said, but his flushed cheeks were proof that he was hiding something.
If looks could kill, the one you gave him would have certainly done the trick.
“I�� full honesty?” he asked quietly.
You nodded “Full honesty”
He closed his eyes and sighed. “Okay, but you can’t get mad at me”
You narrowed your eyes at him “That’s not a promise I can make, but I’ll do my best”
He bit his lip before taking your hands in his.
“I uh… I found your list”
You just stared at him. “What list?”
“This one…” he took the piece of paper out of his pocket where it had been burning a metaphorical hole in his hip ever since he’d found it.
He handed it to you, but you didn’t need to unfold it to know what it was. I was a bright pink piece of paper that had been ripped out of your diary the night before.
You completely froze, panic overtaking you.
“Oh my god. Oscar…” You couldn’t look him in the eyes as you tried to explain “you weren’t meant to find that I’m so sorry! I was going to throw it away this morning and I guess I put it down and completely forgot about it. Fuck- please don’t think I’m weird or whatever and just forget about it, okay? Please?”
You put your head in your hands and whined in distress. This couldn’t be happening. Your loving boyfriend had just learned about your depraved fantasies, and he was never going to see you the same way again.
“I can’t forget about it baby, I spent the entire day jerking off about it”
You head snapped up to finally look into his eyes, your jaw hanging in disbelief. You could tell he was dead serious and your gaze slowly trailed downwards towards his pants, where you could tell he was hard, then back up to his face to find him biting his lip so hard it was turning white.
“you-  what?”
“Sweetheart, I got so hard when I read it, I almost got in my car to come and get you from work. I want to do every thing on that list with you” he leaned closer to you and whispered “Every. Single. Thing.”
His arm wrapped around you and pulled you closer to him, lips coming to brush against your neck. “especially number 3…”
You glanced at the list, seeing what he was referring to and gasped.
“Oscar!”
He chuckled into the crook of your neck.
“Who knew you were so dirty, hmm? Where have you been hiding all this time?”
“I- I didn’t know how to ask” you stuttered as he nipped at the skin of your shoulder.
“That right? Well ask me now, then” he said and you frowned in confusion.
“What?”
“Ask me. Go down the list, and ask me to do those things to you…”
His lips trailed down your body and his hands pushed you to lay down on the sofa as you spluttered in confusion. “I don’t- what?”
“What’s the first thing on the list?” he asked, he knew of course, but he needed to hear you say it.
You blushed, checking the list.
“Choking…”
“Then ask me to choke you”
You shuddered as his mouth continued downwards and his hands spread your legs, one of them pushing your flimsy pyjama shorts to the side to expose you to him.
“Oscar what-“
“I want to see how wet you get just from saying it, go on then.” He ordered and you keened as a finger dipped through your barely moist folds.
“I want you… to uhm” your blush deepened and Oscar smiled at you condescendingly.
“Go on baby, you can do it”
You gulped.
“I want you to choke me” you squeezed your eyes shut at the admission, but Oscar was having none of it.
“Now fucking look at me and ask me again”
You gasped and your eyes flew open to look at him.
“I want you to choke me!”
“Good girl” he stroked your thigh “Next thing?”
You glanced at the list still clutched tightly in you hands.
“Spanking.”
Oscar cocked his head to the side. “What about spanking?”
Your jaw clenched, the fucker knew how to get what he wanted.
“I want you to spank me”
He smiled and nodded for you to continue.
“I want you to fuck me over the balcony for everyone to see” you said, and Oscar’s pupils dilated as he used his fingers to spread you open for him.
“Yeah? Want everyone to see how fucking filthy you actually are?” You whined as his thumb came to dip inside you briefly before rubbing it in slow circles over your clit.
“I want you to degrade and praise me…”
He felt like he was barely holding on to his sanity at this point.
“That’s so hot, fuck.” He palmed himself through his sweats “You want to be my good girl yeah? Want to be my good little slut? Only thing you’re good for anyway…”
You whimpered, his words making your whole body heat up, and took a deep breath before continuing.
“I want you to fuck my mouth”
He had to grip himself through his pants to ground himself, your words having an enormous effect on his composure.
Where had his sweet little innocent girlfriend gone?
“I’ll fuck your mouth baby, make you fucking drool for it, god you’d look so pretty taking me down your throat”
You were definitely wet now, and he took the liberty of sliding a finger inside you and hooking it upwards just to watch you squirm as he rubbed that special spot inside you.
“I want you to tie me up and force me to take it” you said breathlessly.
The noise he let out at that was animalistic as his wide eyes found yours and his jaw went slack as he pulled his pants down just enough to get a hand around himself.
“You have no idea how hot you’d look all tied up and helpless under me baby, it’s making me so hard just thinking about it..”
You moaned as he added a second finger inside you.
“I want, fuck- I want you to use me, and fill me up with your cum whenever you want”
“Shit.” He hissed “Fuck baby, I’m going to fill you up so good, you'll see…”
“Please”
You hadn’t realised how close you were getting, but Oscar’s expert fingers were making you delirious as you continued.
“I want you to fuck me so hard I can’t walk, want to cry from how good you feel inside me, wanna beg for your cock”
Oscar growled and pulled his fingers out.
“Then beg”
He settled over you, putting his weight on you, his dick resting against your folds as he panted into your mouth.
“Beg for my cock, slut”
You were so fucking turned on. Dominant Oscar was something new, but so, so incredibly hot you would have done absolutely anything to have him inside you at that moment.
“Please, please Osc, I need it. I need your cock so bad, please!”
He growled and slid in to the hilt without warning, making you moan into the heated kiss he was currently giving you to distract you. He was thick and the stretch was delicious as his cock dragged along your walls, making you see stars.
He started a deep, hard pace and his hips slapped against yours, obscene sounds filling the room.
“Fuck baby, so fucking wet for me. This what you wanted all along? For me to fucking ruin you on my cock?”
“Yes, Oscar, fuck!”
He chuckled darkly.
“That’s a good girl, so fucking tight, You’re getting close aren’t you? I can sweet your sweet pussy clenching around me, trying to keep me inside...”
He gripped your hips harder and angled his thrusts upwards, nailing your g-spot, and you were a goner. White spots danced in your vision as the pleasure overcame you, cunt spasming around Oscar.
“Perfect, perfect cunt. And it’s all fucking mine” he growled as he finally spilled inside you, filling you to the brim and forcing a pathetic whimper out of you at the new feeling.
Oscar had never come inside you before, and it was insanely hot. The feeling of your slick, hot walls pulsing around him was pure heaven and he couldn’t wait to test everything on that list.
After you’d regained your breath, you chuckled silently to yourself while stroking Oscar's back.
If this is what you got for leaving your list out, maybe you should tell Oscar about your box of toys in the in the back of your closet…
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thebestsetter · 1 month ago
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Thinking about your first christmas spent with Alexis Ness.
Germany's streets were full of bright red and green lights. The buzzling of people buying presents for their loved ones filled the stores, and a common yet gentle christmas melody rung in the air, creating a movie-like scenario.
Amongst the seemingly infinite crowd of people, you and your boyfriend, Alexis Ness, walked hand in hand through a busy Munich. It was one of his rare off weeks. I guess even Bayern's managers know about the whole christmas' spirit thing and decided to give their player a little break.
"Look, Lexis! It's snowing!" You smiled, stretching your free hand to touch a little snowflake that fell from the night sky. The night was so cold that little puffs of hair could be seen when you spoke "Isn't it beautiful?"
"Yes, meine Liebe" he said, looking straight at you and not even once sparing a glance at the snowflake. How could he, when the prettiest one he's ever known was right in front of him, holding his hand like she'd die if she let go? "It is."
Ness' parents never celebrated Christmas. Actually, they never celebrated any holidays. This was the first christmas he was really getting to enjoy. And all because of you, his sweet girlfriend. God, just thinking about you made his heart combust.
How did he bag you, really?
"Come on! We need to be quick or else the book store is going to be closed by the time we get there!" You laughed, pulling him with you and running.
"Slow down, Angel!" He laughed, tightening his hold on your hand and running after you, muttering a quick "Sorry" to the people you both bumped into.
Your matching Harry Potter houses scarfs flowing in the wind together created a beautiful picture, and your laughs mixed with the sound of christmas songs and bells. One hand holding yours and the other holding his hat so it wouldn't fall, Ness tried to drink in every single milimeter of you, wanting to keep the picture of your smiling face in his memory forever.
He was really enjoying this. Was christmas always this fun?!
"Willkommen!" Said the sweet bookstore lady. She was a short old woman with round glasses and a gentle smile on her face. She matched the christmas vibe perfectly "What do you lovebirds want?" She smiled at you both, which made Alexis blush a little.
Being yours was the greatest title he has ever achieved. He was smitten for you, and couldn't even believe you actually wanted to be with him. You were just so, so perfect!
"I'd like a child's book, please. It's for my little cousin! She really likes princesses, so if you had something like that it would be great!" You smiled at her
"Oh! I have just the right thing. You wait right here and I'll go fetch it!" She smiled right back at you, entering a little door on the side of the cashier.
The store was pretty much empty, since people don't seem to like books anymore. Only you, Alexis and the lady's cat were there. The weather was warm because of the heater, and the wood bookshelves made you feel like you were in a 1950's movie.
You and Ness sat down at a little table on the side of the store. He began playing with your fingers gently, and then looked at you with such fondness in his eyes that made you melt.
"This is the last one, right?" Ness asked, smiling
"Yep!" You answered
Actually, this was not the last present you wanted to buy. You wanted to buy something for Ness, but didn't know what it would be. It was your first christmas spent with him, so it needed to be the perfect gift.
"When will you give it to her?" He asked "To your little cousin, I mean"
"My uncle will dress up as Santa to give it to her and my other cousins" you smiled, and then sighed longingly while a memory came to your head "My family does that every year. It makes me remember when I was the one to recieve gifts from Santa. Good times. My favorite one was a doll I got when I was like, eight." You then remembered your "issue", and realized you could know what gift to give Ness based on his own favorite gift.
Bingo! It would make him remember the good part of his childhood and he would like it! After all, who doesn't feel like letting out your inner kid sometimes?
"What was your favorite gift from Santa?"
Ha, you're a genius!
Suddenly, Ness' smile dropped, and he looked almost embarassed by something. He looked at the table with a sad expression on his face and blushed
Oh oh. Maybe you're not so genius.
"I-I never got anything from Santa" he admitted, shamefully "My parents didn't really celebrate christmas, so I never got one. I always put my sock up though, but he never came"
That was the saddest thing you've ever heard.
"Oh, Lexis!" You caressed his face gently. You then got up and brought him closer to you.
His shoulders trembled a little, so you enveloped him in a hug
"I'm so sorry you had to go through this!" You couldn't back off now. You needed to buy exactly what little kid Alexis wanted. "What did you want to recieve, though?"
"Anything would be fine" he muttered, voice muffled by your coat "But I really wanted a wand. You know Harry Potter's wand?" You nodded "That one"
"I found the book!" The old lady came back, interrupting the moment. She quickly realized it though, and was fast to apologize "I'm sorry, did I interrupt something?"
"No." You assured her "No, don't worry. Let me see the book."
"Here" she handled it to you
"Sounds good" you said after analyzing it "I'll take it. Wait here, Love. I'll be right back"
"I'll pay for it."
"No need, Lexis. I have money"
"I insist."
"Okay then..."
"You both are so cute together"
Once again, Ness blushed like the lovesick fool he was.
Sadly, you didn't have the time to even tease him about it. While he was wrapping your cousin's future book, there was only one thought going through your head:
You finally found Alexis' gift.
"Merry Christmas, Love!" You woke him up by whispering it in his ear, followed by a hug right after.
"Good morning, liebe. And merry christmas to you, too!" He smiled, hugging you just as strongly as you did to him before.
This was really nice. Just you and him, together, cuddling and enjoying each other's presence. He really could get used to this.
"You know, I heard something downstairs while we were sleeping!" You said, faking a terrified expression
"Really?!" Ness asked, fully believeing what you said "Do I need to call the police?"
"NO!" You shouted, but quickly composed yourself "I mean, no! Why don't you just go check?"
"...you sure?"
"Yeah! Go downstairs! More precisely, go take a look under our christmas tree!!"
"Uhm... okay then"
It's not like he could EVER disagree with you anyway.
And so, Ness jumped off the bed, heading towards the christmas tree you both decorated together.
"Where did you say I need to check, again?" He asked, a little confused as to why you were recording the whole thing ever since he got out your shared bedroom.
"Underneath the tree! See if there's something there!" You said, not being able to contain how giddy you were feeling.
"There's a... present" Ness exclaimed, holding the wrapped box and scaning all of it's side
"Oh my! Who would have thought?" You smiled, giggling "Who's the owner of the box, I ponder!"
"The thief that invaded our house!" Ness shouted, confident that he got the question right
"Lexis, no." You deadpan, putting the phone down and walking closer to him "Look for a name in the wrapping"
And he did as he was told.
"To: Lexis" He read, and you smiled "Who gave me this, you?"
"Oh, no no! I was sleeping the whole time!" You then faked a surprised expression "Maybe it was Santa!"
"...Santa?"
"Yes! Open it, quickly! It's your christmas present from Santa!"
"Uhm... alright"
He tore the gift open
No way.
No freaking way.
A Harry Potter wand. The thing he always wanted ever since he was a kid.
"Oh wow! Santa really knows you, huh?" You teased, but his brain didn't even register it. He was too focused thinking about other things.
Santa doesn't exist.
This gift couldn't be from Santa. It was from you.
The first christmas present he ever got was from you.
Hell, this wand could be a rock and he would still accept it gladly. Because the gift doesn't matter. What matters is the person who gave it.
You. The love of his life.
He carefully put the wand down and pproached you with big, round eyes.
"Alexis? What are you..."
You couldn't even finish your sentence. He just pulled you in for one of the most heart-felt hugs you ever experienced. His arms wrapped around you in a strong embrace, but not in a umconfortable way. It felt safe. He felt safe.
"Thank you" He muttered, placing his face in the crook of your neck and inhaling your scent and wait - why did your shoulder suddenly feel wet? "Thank you, thank you. Thank you so much. I love you. God, I love you so, so much. You have no idea"
"I love you too, Lexis" You hugged him back, caressing his hair with your hands.
Man, christmas was amazing.
And so the snow began falling again, as the lovers basked in each other's presence.
Christmas is about spending time with those you love. And you were both doing exactly that.
"Merry christmas, Meine Liebe"
"Merry christmas, Lexis"
~ This has been in my drafts since october.
DEDICATED TO NESS' GF @megwuru!!!
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buckyalpine · 1 year ago
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Cheating!Steve x reader, Bucky x reader
Oh look, more cheating Steve with sweetheart Bucky to save us
A/N: Last year someone asked me for some mad angsty fic and I posted and deleted it so quick because it was god awful. Just awful. However, I had kept a draft of it cause even though I hated it and everything about it, I didn't want it gone forever. Upon rereading it recently...I kinda like it. So I decided to change some stuff (like most of the entire plot), switch around characters (I'm a Bucky girl) and repost. If you want to see the OG fic, I can post it again or just edit this to add it under the new version
Steve couldn't stand seeing you like this. In the hospital room, the needles prodding you, it all reminds him of hydra and the things he had seen on numerous missions. When you almost die, he's thrown back into the spiral where he has no hope for a future. And nothing changes after you get better. You had almost died once. Missions were getting riskier and you weren't always in the clear. In his mind, everything good in his life leaves him or gets ripped away eventually. Peggy was a prime example of that. It's just a matter of time.
Even in your injured state, your attention was all on Steve. You knew how much he hated seeing you hurt. It sent him into a dark place few people had witnessed. As soon as your eyes fluttered open, your tired eyes met his red rimmed, puffy ones. For days, every time you try to bring him back to you, he has his walls built up again.
He won't let himself love you more.
He drinks.
He drinks enough to get drunk. It takes bottle after bottles but he doesn't care. He doesn't care about anything any more. So much so, he decides to seek the warmth of someone else.
Because you almost left him.
You could die so easily.
You almost did.
Nothing matters any more. His moans of pleasure are empty but he's wrapped around her none the less. He doesn't stop until his body can't move, too exhausted to even think about guilt.
-
You have it all planned out. You were finally released from the hospital and the first thing you wanted to do was spend time with Steve. The team had left the compound so you could set up a movie night for you and the captain, you don't want to let him slip from your grasp, not after all you'd been through together. You didn't go through hell and back to lose him like this. You fought for your life to pull through.
There are snacks laid out on the table, a movie pulled up, some hot chocolate made just for you and him. You shuffle nervously, your heart beating erratically. You didn't spend 4 years with him just for this to end because you nearly died. No. He was worth the fight. His cold demeanor was not towards you but towards the fear of losing you. And that fear was from love. Love you both shared deeply for each other.
You knew he got back from the bar late; if he was too drunk then you'd help him to his room and talk to him in the morning. It was a new habit of his but you understood.
Except he never came. He always made it home. Not tonight.
Steve stumbled in the next morning, rubbing his eyes, seeing a small sleeping form on the sofa, snacks and some drinks laid out in the living room. He swallowed thickly when he sees you get up from the couch wearing one of his hold hoodies, making your way towards him.
"Steve?"
You have a soft smile on your face, but it drops when you get a closer look at him. Tears prickle at your eyes when you see the way his neck is littered in bruises, his skin still flushed. He can't look you in the eyes, not after what he'd just done.
"I-
You freeze before him, you don't want to ask. You don't want to know. The broken expression his face is enough for you. You wordlessly leave the living room, locking yourself in, giving FRIDAY instructions to make sure no one can enter.
"Did you talk to y/n" Bucky asks excitedly when he sees Steve sitting in the living room. He knows how excited you were about the movie night, spending days planning every last detail. His excitement drops when he sees the food untouched and you're nowhere to be seen. "Where is she?"
Steve remains silent, staring at his hands. The rest of the team enter the living room, hoping to find you both curled on the couch, but no. Nat's eyes narrow when she sees the hickeys on Steve's neck but something tells her they're not from you, you've never marked him like that before, you've always been so gentle with him.
"How could you?" She hissed, while the rest of the team look at her in confusion. It doesn't take long for them to piece things together. And it's a mess.
You come down to the living room, both Sam and Tony holding Bucky down on the couch while he glares at Steve, his hands still in fists. They all turn towards you with broken eyes, this is not what they ever wanted for you. The second he sees you, he breaks down. You're numb to his cries, his pleas.
He finds you leaving the compound at 1:00 AM from where he's still seated on the couch, something you'd never done before.
"Baby? Where are you going"
You ignore him, making your way to the garage. You were never able to sleep since and staying in bed only left you alone with your thoughts.
"I-I need some space. Don't worry about where I'm going"
"Y/n, please, just let me explain"
"No"
"I made a mistake, I-
"I don't care. I just want need some air"
"Promise me you'll come back?"
You shake your head, you can't even look at Steve. You scoff, shoving past him, not caring when he hisses in pain. His cheek is bruised, spots of dark purple and blue bloom around his eye and you'd seen Nat icing Bucky's hand earlier.
"Y/n, please angel, I-I just want to talk, just promise me you'll come back?"
"I promise" You reluctantly mumble, hopping on your motor bike and speeding off before Steve can call after you again.
You loved him so much.
You fought so hard to pull through for him, you heard every word he'd said to you when you were unconscious.
Tears clouded your vision.
It all happens too fast for you to comprehend.
The car doesn't see you.
The bend is sharp.
You bike is sent over the edge.
Darkness.
-
It's been a week.
You still haven't woken up.
It's all his fault. It doesn't matter that the driver was intoxicated. It didn't matter that it was dark out. You wouldn't have left the compound if he hadn't done what he did and it eats him alive.
He's not met with any sympathy.
No one bats an eye at his tears or sobs, too concerned about your well being to go and comfort him. Like clock work, every member of the team visits on rotation since they can't all be there at once. however Bucky is exempt from all hospital rules with one brooding, grumpy stare.
Bucky is by your side every single day. He doesn't say anything when Steve grips your hand, praying for you to wake up, silently praying himself while your heart monitor continues to beep. Steve refuses to move from your side but he's not given much of a choice when Fury summons him personally for someone mission related.
He's only gone for a few hours but that's when you finally stir. Bucky is on his feet instantly, paging for the doctor while stroking your hair.
"Hey pretty girl" Bucky whispers when your eyes finally focus, the knuckles of his metal hand gently caressing your cheek. The cool sensation helps you feel more alert. You smile seeing his baby blue eyes, feeling safe as he talks to you softly.
-
Everything hits Steve all at once. He didn't just betray you. He betrayed the team. His bestfriend. Himself. All the people who had faith in him to make the right choice, to do the right thing, to protect them. And he threw it away. Everyone waited a month for you to fully recover before throwing a welcome back party so you'd actually be able to enjoy it. Steve looked back longingly at the happy group gathered together in the living room, more emotions hitting him again.
He was happy you were alive. His sweet, sweet girl pulled through. H
He was envious of the love everyone was sharing, one he wasn't privy to anymore. He was invited, he was still apart of the team after all but he knew it wasn't his place.
He was jealous.
Jealous of the way you melted into Bucky's side. Longing to feel that warmth that he used to feel himself. Bucky had his arm around your waist, keeping you tucked right by him, taking care of you long after you were discharged. He wasn't going to stop any time soon.
There was something between you two, everyone could sense it. The soft gazes at each other and innocent kisses. Bucky wouldn't let a day go by without pressing his lips to your cheek, your nose, your forehead, the top of your head. He needed you to know you were loved and cared for. He stuck to his guns, claiming his actions were purely platonic but the pink blush on his cheeks proved that he was a bald faced liar.
-
Steve knows theres no one to blame but himself. He sighs and swallows the lump in his throat as you stand on your tiptoes to kiss the brunette, sealing you both together forever. He's always thought it would be the two of you standing together at the alter but how things had changed. The cheers of the crowd are a dull buzz to him. He watches Bucky swoop in for another kiss, this time dipping you and capturing your lips sweetly.
"I love you Mrs. Barnes"
"I love you more, Mr. Barnes"
Your happy, love struck giggles cause the first tear to fall.
He does his best to smile when you both walk by, flashes of what your wedding would have looked like. The white dress. The veil. The flowers.
if only he never-
But it was too late.
2K notes · View notes
0097linersb · 4 months ago
Text
Little White Lies (m)
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Pairings: Satoru Gojo x Reader
Genre: Smut, basically pwp, kind of fluff for a bit
Word count: 5k~
Summary: Satoru gets too excited at the thought of being your husband.
Follow me on twitter: marmitasatosugu <3 I´ll proofread this some other day
You thanked God every day that Satoru had the attention span of a 2-year-old considering that you often got away with stuff solely because he was walking around pointing at random clouds or rambling about what movie to watch later. Shoko joked once that you should just leash him after he rushed excitedly to feed some pigeons on the street, but you just laughed it off – you loved the way he was, fully and completely.
Now to quote an example: after a few years of dating, sometimes you found yourself telling a little white lie around, simply because it was so much easier to just call Satoru your husband rather than your boyfriend, especially since it made people take you so much more seriously. It started small, workers had been referring to the man as your spouse for so long that at some point, you just stopped correcting them. It was great, it was practical; people would treat you with more respect and you would have fun inside your little fantasy world.
“My husband will pay for it, the one with the white hair over there.”
“Good afternoon, I´m looking for a gift for my husband.”
“My husband will pick it up later, thank you.”
“Put it on my husband´s tab, please.”
Satoru never caught on to it and you´d much rather that he never did – but once again, the probabilities of it happening were low: if you weren´t holding his hand, he was probably far from you, exploring the big world around him and all its wonders. But oh well, your luck couldn´t last forever.
“Good afternoon, Ms. Y/N,” The receptionist with the Hawaiian shirt smiled once you and Satoru walked inside the resort hand-in-hand. “This must be your husband, welcome to Crystal Waves, Mr. Gojo. Congratulations on the wedding!”
Frozen in place for a second, you couldn´t for the life of you look at your boyfriend. It´s not that you were ashamed, it was a silly little thing that you knew Satoru wouldn´t mind or judge you for, it´s just that… He would tease you so much, you´d never hear the end of it.
You had forgotten all about how when making the reservations, after a long conversation with the lady on the phone, somehow you ended up with free upgrades because apparently it was your honeymoon – Technically, all you said was that the reservation was for you and your husband, she was the one who, probably trying to be nice, commented that she was surprised because you sounded so young, therefore asking if you were newlyweds, so naturally you agreed because the little lie you told was now too far along to take back.
That was almost two months ago, of course you´d forgotten about it. If you hadn´t, you could have just filled Satoru in on the little story, he would love to play pretend, and this was right up his alley. But you didn´t, so before he could say anything, you swallowed down the embarrassment and pretended normality, “Good afternoon, Martha. Yes, this is he.”
You still didn´t look at Satoru, but you heard him thanking her amusedly.
“We´re so glad to have you here,” She smiled as another worker brought you welcome orange cocktails with a beautiful pink flower decorating the glass before guiding you towards the front desk for check-in.
“Did you have a chance to look at all the activities we offer?” Martha asked after you finished signing the paperwork. “For some of the schedules, we ask for the reservations to be made in advance.”
“Yes, that´s understandable. I´m interested in the SPA treatments; we can book it for tomorrow if you have any spots available.”
“Yes, of course. Are we going for the complete package, back massage, facial, scalp treatment, hot stones, body rub…?”
“I think the back ma-”
“Complete package,” Satoru interrupted, tightening the hold on your hand.
“Ok, perfect. 9 AM, 2 PM or 5PM?” Martha asked, clicking away on the computer, smiling up at Satoru for his romantic gesture.
“9 sound goods.”
“Any other plans?”
You waited for Satoru to answer, since he was the one who spent days rambling about some of the stuff he wanted to do, but since he stayed silent, you cleaned your throat and took it upon yourself, “The parasailing one, what days do you have it available?”
“Will it be just your husband or you´ll be going as well?”
“Both of us.”
“Looks like we have an opening two days from now at 3 PM, does that sound good?”
“Perfect, and what about the White Stones Trail?”
“It happens every Monday at 8 AM, should I book it for the two of you?”
“Oh God no, just for my husband, please.”
You didn´t even notice you got carried away in the role until Satoru dropped your hand, snaking his arm around your waist and pulling you slightly closed, his thumb rubbing the skin on your side. You still refused to look at him.
“Booked. Anything else?”
“We´d like to go scuba diving on Tuesday.”
“We have a boat leaving at 10 AM.”
“Sounds good. I guess that´s all for now.”
“All set then, these are the keys to your room. The elevator is at the end of the hall to your left, press 10. Your bags are already waiting for you inside. Hope you have an incredible stay and please find me if you need anything.”
You both thanked Martha before you spun in your heels and tried to make a run for it, your escape plan being quickly ruined by Satoru´s hand finding yours once again, holding you close. Taking a deep breath, you accepted defeat and prepared yourself mentally for the next days of hell.
“So…” Satoru started once you were out of earshot from the main desk. You didn´t look at him but you could tell just by the tone of his voice that he was smiling as you walked down the hall.
“Don´t start,” You warned.
“Too late. Husband, huh?”
“Listen, don´t get your panties in a twist-”
“Oh, I´m absolutely getting my panties in a twist.”
“There´s a logical explanation for all of this,” You informed as he pressed the elevator button.
“Which is?”
“I don´t want to talk about it.”
“But you will.”
You sighed, “When I made the reservations, I told them it was our honeymoon so we´d get upgraded and get like, some free stuff.”
The elevator doors dinged open and you walked in, not even being able to appreciate the paradisiacal panoramic beach view inside. Satoru dropped your hand now that you had nowhere to run, leaning against the glass window and crossing his arms to look at you attentively – At least that´s what you guessed since your eyes were glued to the ceiling.
“Y/N, I´m rich,” He stated as a matter of fact, because well, it was true. “You don´t need to lie to get stuff.”
Shit.
He caught you on your semi-lie - and he knew it too by the way there was a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.
You shouldn´t have looked at him.
“Fuck, ok,” You rolled your eyes, annoyed that he wouldn´t just accept your answer and move on. Taking another deep breath, you carefully measured your words: “Sometimes, for practical reasons, I just tell people we´re married.”
“For practical reasons?”
“Yes, it makes my life easier in certain situations.”
“And how long have you been doing this for?”
Would this damn elevator never reach your floor?
“A few months.”
“And what are you telling people I am?”
“Are you stupid? If we´re married, you´re my husband.”
“Which makes you, my wife.”
The doors finally opened and Satoru reached for your hand, practically dragging you along with his abnormally long legs as you stared at his back.
“Yes Satoru, that´s the correct term.”
“So, you're telling people that you´re my wife?”
You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, struggling to keep up with his pace and confused at his reaction. You expected insufferable teasing for the next few days and not… Whatever this was.
“Yes Sato – Are you ok? Did you hit your head or something?”
“No,” He finally stopped in front of your room, turning around to look at you with a huge smile on his face as you caught your breath. “I´m just so hard right now.”
“You- You´re what now?” You choked out as he searched his pockets for the magnetic card that opened the door. Your eyes automatically trailed down his pants and he was indeed not lying about his current state. “Do you have a thing for elevators?”
Satoru celebrated when he found the key, positioning it against the lock and smiling when he heard the engines turning, eyes back on you as he opened the door eagerly, “No, but I do have a thing for you calling me your husband.”
He didn´t wait for an answer, pulling you into the room and practically banging the door closed before pressing you against it. Satoru ripped his black glasses off, throwing them somewhere on the floor before bending down to your height so your faces were only inches apart.
“Say it again.”
“Satoru, let´s look around the room first, enjoy the view -”
“That can wait, I´d rather enjoy this view for now.”
“´Twas expensive,” You tried again.
“I´d spend all my money on you. Now say it again.”
“What?”
“Call me your husband.”
You were still so confused, was this a trap? For some reason, Satoru seemed to be enjoying it, a bit too much even. You let your walls crumble down slightly, wrapping your arms around Satoru´s neck so you´d be more comfortable.
“My husband?” You tentatively obeyed.
He instantly groaned, crashing his lips against yours with so much need that you felt like this was your first time all over again. He started by holding your face, his hands so big that he could hold your jaw with his palms while his fingers dug at the roots of your hair on your nape. He just held you like you were absolutely everything in the world to him and that got your legs weak. His tongue massaged yours and you were whining against his mouth in no time, hands clawing at his black shirt harsher every time he grinded against you. Satoru was equally as worked up, his chest heaving up and down as his hands left your face to grab at the back of your thighs, pulling you up so you could wrap your legs around his hips.
It was so much easier kissing him like this, since you were actually able to reach him. Unfortunately though, this new position got your boyfriend´s throbbing cock right against your core which you know, did nothing to calm you down. You grabbed at his hair in pure need, making a mess out of it as he left your swollen and wet lips alone to attack your neck.
“You´re so beautiful,” He groaned against your neck after he sucked at your jugular, his hips subconsciously bucking against yours. “Can´t believe you´re mine.”
“Satoru,” You moaned as he bit into the junction of your shoulder and neck.
His lips caught yours once again in another messy and aggressive kiss, his right hand leaving your thigh to start bunching up the bottom of your dress until he could see your panties.
“I could just take you right now,” He groaned against your lips.
“Then do it.”
The corner of his lips tugged up in amusement, “Now that´s no way to treat my wife, is it?”
His own words seemed to light another fire inside him, before you could even react, he was kissing you roughly once again, spinning the two of you around and carrying you towards the bed, where he threw you unceremoniously. You yelped at the impact and once more when he grabbed at your calves, pulling you to the edge of the bed. You supported yourself up on your elbows, so you could see when he went down to his knees in between your legs.
He stayed there on the floor for a few seconds, simply admiring the wet spot on your panties, your legs folded up so they wouldn´t be dangling from the edge of the bed. As you were about to complain, he pressed his thumb right on your clit over the fabric, before slowly rubbing circles with the pad of his finger, staring at what he was doing like he was hypnotized. A gasp left your lips at the surprise feeling and his eyes, which were so focused, snapped out of the trance to look up at you.
As your eyes met, he smiled, “My wife.”
“What´s up with you?” You shakily asked as he gently slid your panties down your legs, throwing them away somewhere.
“I just like the sound of it,” Satoru answered as he grabbed at your thighs once again, positioning them on his shoulders, placing a wet kiss on your inner tight.
Your head fell back in pleasure when he bent down, slowly licking your slit from bottom to top before giving your clit a light suck. He then pulled away slightly and you could already see his lips glistening, his arms wrapped around your tights firmly.
“Tell me you´ll marry me.”
You raised an eyebrow at him, not familiar with this type of foreplay and not sure if this was the right setting for this type of discussion. In response to your silence, he dove back in, his tongue eagerly working on your clit – Why did your boyfriend, besides being rich and extremely hot, also have to be good at just fucking everything?
As soon as you left a moan out and he felt your body start twitching at his ministrations, he leaned back once again, “Tell me.”
He looked at you so hungrily that you heard yourself answering before even realizing, “I´ll marry you, Satoru.”
“And that we will have a big, beautiful family.”
And suddenly, it all made sense: Gojo Satoru, the single most powerful sorcerer in the whole world, unraveled at the thought of marrying you, of you being his, of being loved and having a happy family. Your chest filled with so much love suddenly; your boyfriend was such a loser.
“I´ll give you all that,” You agreed.
Even if it was a fantasy, for this moment it didn´t have to be.
You gave him the answer he wanted, and he excitedly went back to his job after hearing your words. His tongue expertly lapping at you in between kisses and sucks, one of your hands flying to grab at his hair to try and ground yourself. Even after years with this man, you´d never be able to get used to just how good he was at fucking you - and today especially, after a long time of not being touched because either you or him were always away for work, you were feeling extra sensitive.
Satoru knew exactly what to do to get you squirming in record time, flatting his tongue to draw circles against your clit, flicking his tongue from side to side, up and down, fucking it into you and it just drove you absolutely crazy. Even his groans of pleasure as he ate you out with so much hunger, vibrating against you, got your head spinning.
“I´m close,” You moaned, as if he didn´t already know.
“Not yet, hang in there,” He stopped, breathing hard and turning his head to the side, vehemently kissing the inner part of your thigh twice more before sitting up on his knees. “I´m having fun.”
He completely ignored your whines of protest, sitting you up so his face was now right in front of your boobs. Satoru smiled in victory at the view, softly sliding the two straps of your dress down your shoulder until all the fabric fell to your waist. Your boyfriend wasted no time, kissing all over the skin of your chest and leaving what soon would be many deep purple marks, his thumb teasing your nipples.
“Have I told you how much I love your boobs?”
“A few times,” You joked in between gasps, you both knew he would tell you that like, at least once a day.
“If I could just hold them all day I´d be the happiest man on earth,” Was the last thing he said before his mouth latched around your nipple, your back arching into the touch.
Once Satoru was satisfied with his work, he gently pushed you back into bed and climbed on top of you, supporting his weight on his two arms. At this point, you were just praying that he would fuck you already, you were dripping, walls clenching around nothing so desperately it hurt – and your boyfriend wasn´t much better, in this position you could feel very clearly how much his cock was throbbing.
You whined in need as he stared at you with his pretty blue eyes and laughed at your desperation – as if you couldn´t see he was about to cum in his pants too.
“What does my baby want?” He smirked condescendingly, amused at your need.
“To be fucked,” You groaned.
“Ah, anything for my wife,” He agreed, now only supporting his weight on his left arm as he snaked his other hand in between your bodies. “Just let me open you up first.”
You would complain you didn´t need to be prepped, but before you could say anything, his middle finger was already inside you and you forgot what you were going to say. He gently and languidly pumped his finger in and out a few times, adding another when he considered you were good to go.
You were a whiny mess, especially when he curled his fingers and found spots no one ever could before.
“Will you take my family name?” Satoru asked suddenly, his face right in front of yours, attentively watching your expression, his hair tickling your forehead. You were too out of it to even process the words coming out of his mouth. “You know the Gojo Clan is one of the most important and powerful clans in the country. It would sound nice, Gojo Y/N.”
He smiled kind of sadistically at your dazed expression before continuing, his fingers not stopping even once, “Or I could take your last name, I don´t mind. Who gives a fuck about the Gojo Clan anyways? I just suggested it ´cause I´d love everyone to know you´re mine.”
Satoru sped up his fingers and you grabbed his arm, your whole body shaking as your high approached, “But if you accept, you´ll be the heiress of everything, everything will be yours, including me. You can do anything you want, order whoever you want, and spend whatever you want, I´ll let you rule over it all, one snap of your fingers and it´s yours. My wife, the head of the Gojo clan.”
A dragged-out moan left your lips not only because of his restless fingers inside of you, but also because of the whole scenario he was painting, he wanted you to have it all, he wanted to be the one to give you everything. He felt the way your walls were squeezing around him and smiled, slowing down his fingers, “But for now, I´ll be a good husband and fuck my beautiful wife until she´s crying.”
At that, your eyes lit up, quickly sitting up to unbutton his shirt as he unzipped his pants. Once he was done with his trousers, he started helping you with the buttons and you abandoned your task, deciding to litter the already exposed parts of his chest and abdomen with kisses, an “I love you” leaving your mouth in between each touch of your lips on his skin – Because you did, you loved him so much.
The show of affection drove Satoru crazy, harshly throwing his shirt away. You were equally insane at the sight of your boyfriend in just his boxers, practically salivating as if this wasn´t the thousandth time you´d seen him like this. He caught you looking at him in pure awe and smiled, leaning over you for a quick sweet kiss before getting rid of his boxers.
“I´ll get you a ring so big it´ll weigh on your finger,” He informed as he climbed on top of you. “Everyone will be able to spot it from miles away.”
“Don´t want it, just want you.”
“You already have me,” He held your face, his eyes so intense you froze for a second. “Always had, always will.”
“What a simp,” You teased as if you weren´t right about to cry.
“Only for my wife,” He smiled, admiring your face.
“And now will my husband finally please fuck me?”
You said it kind of jokingly, but the title appeared to do the trick anyways; you felt his cock twitching against your thigh before he grabbed at one of your legs, pushing your knee slightly up and groaning as he grabbed his member to position it against you.
After all this lovey-dovey talk, you kind of expected Satoru to want to make slow gentle sappy love to you, and you wouldn´t exactly mind since that was amazing as well, but oh you were so wrong. You had miscalculated how horny the thought of being your husband got your boyfriend, because as he entered you, a loud groan left his lips and while normally he would wait for you to adjust to his size, this time he just kept going. At least he was slow with it, slow enough that you could feel every vein, every inch of his skin against your walls, every ridge, every bump.
You dug your nails into his back to distract yourself from the discomfort as he bottomed out, his lips open in a silent moan, and you caught yourself thinking about how lucky you were; out of everyone in the world, you were the only one who got to see the Honored one like this, so vulnerable and beautiful and yours.
“You feel so good,” He breathed out, beginning to drag his cock out. “Every fucking time.”
You didn´t care if it hurt, you wanted him to destroy you, “Satoru?”
“Yes, beautiful?”
As he started fucking into you again, you lost your words, but the pleading look you gave him and the drag of your nails down his back sent him the message loud and clear.
“Oh,” He smirked. “How am I so lucky?”
You felt his lips on yours as he began to speed up his hips, his right hand wrapping around your thigh so he could pull you flush against his cock. You cursed, feeling like you were being impaled, “Fuck.”
“To have a beautiful sweet loving wife who wants to be fucked like a slut.”
His hips were so smooth yet so fast, knowing all the right angles to get you biting at his shoulder and squeezing your walls around him.
“And you know what´s the best? All these men wanting you will have to know you´re only mine.”
It came as a surprise to you after a few months of dating that Satoru Gojo was a jealous boyfriend. It made absolutely no sense to you, considering that he was… well, Satoru Gojo. Like, what do you mean the strongest and most powerful man in the world, who could end all civilization with a flick of his finger if he wanted to, got bothered when you and Nanami took a cooking class together?
However, you kind of liked his possessiveness over you, especially when it made him thrust harder into you, got his tongue in your mouth in public, or his hand around your neck at a bar.
He felt the way you clenched at his words, breaking apart from you with a groan and flipping you around before you could even process what was happening. The way he could just throw you around so easily got you moaning into the sheets as you arched your back waiting for him.
Satoru didn´t leave you waiting for long, a second later he was already bottoming out inside you once again, and the hotel sheets were proven to be good quality when they didn´t rip under your fingers as he fucked you like his life depended on it.
You were completely lost, brain scrambled as you communicated through moans and gasps, especially when he pulled you up by the neck so your back stood against his chest. His hand stayed there, holding you in place and choking you as his other hand teasingly found its way down your abdomen, finding your clit as its destination.
Your whole body was shaking, Satoru´s arms were probably almost bleeding with how harshly your nails dug into it so you wouldn´t scream.
“You were made for me. Your pussy was made for me,” His moan was raspy against your ear. “Mine. Only for me. Your husband.”
Satoru was close and you were doing your best to buck your hips back to meet his thrusts, already at the edge too with the way his finger kept rubbing number eights against your clit. You stretched your hand back to grab at his hair, stupid at the feeling of being fucked open. He groaned at you pulling his hair, biting your shoulder to warn you he was about to cum.
“Inside,” You rasped.
He literally shivered at your words, a loud moan leaving his mouth as he thrust into you deeper than anyone had ever been before, including himself. Your vision went blank, your orgasm hitting you without warning and no time for you to prepare yourself, your body twitched violently as gasps left your lips, knowing you would have fallen like a doll if Satoru hadn´t been holding your neck.
“Oh, fuck. Fuck,” He cursed, losing control at the way your walls were crazily clenching around him.
His wet and warm mouth was soon on your shoulders, desperately kissing the bite marks he was leaving. You barely felt as he came inside you, or how his cock twitched against your walls, or how you could barely breathe with how tight he held your neck once his orgasm hit, too lost in your own pleasure. You did hear the beautiful noises coming out from his lips, prolonging your orgasm.
Once the two of you came back to reality, breathing hard, Satoru gently let go of your neck, softly rubbing his thumb over the red marks. As expected, your legs failed to hold you and your chest met the bed a second later, your eyes closed to try and come down from your high.
Satoru stayed on his knees, eyes glued to the way you were dripping out because of your walls´ spasms. He just couldn´t help himself, gathering all his cum that spilled with his fingers, ignoring your whines of protest, and pushing it all back in.
“Just a second baby,” He answered dazedly, his fingers still working.
He was obsessed, addicted to the view. No matter how much your body twitched because of the overstimulation, he couldn´t stop pumping his fingers into you, feeling how wet and slick you were around him. He groaned at the way your lips were swollen because of him, thumb gently rubbing your clit. He continued until your whines turned into moans, until your hips stopped trying to run away and instead bucked back against his fingers, until he felt himself getting hard again.
You didn´t complain when you felt his cock entering you once again, his lips worshiping your back as your eyes remained closed, slightly arching your hips to give him better access as he slowly and gently fucked you. Satoru caressed your hair and kissed your temples, your nape, your eyes, all while calling you beautiful and telling you how much he loved you.
…………………………………………….
“Gojo Satoru.”
Sensing your tone, he didn´t answer in pure fear.
The silence made you leave the bathroom, staring at your boyfriend who was in bed looking at you with wide eyes, “What´s wrong, baby?”
“We´re at a beach resort,” You said in between gritted teeth. “How the fuck am I supposed to go to the beach when it looks like I have been mauled by a bear after being dragged around town by a car?”
“I´m sorry, I got carried away.”
“Oh my god, call Martha and cancel the SPA day tomorrow.”
“I can give you a massage-”
“You´re never touching me again, Satoru.”
He smirked at that, “Yeah, give me a few hours and we´ll see.”
You hated that he was right.
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blluespirit · 10 months ago
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okay first three episodes thoughts
good
bending is cool as fuck
sozin’s actor does an amazing job at full crazy but calculated
scenery is STUNNING
monk gyatso made me cry. idk why i just saw him and wanted him to give me a hug so bad
APPA ACTUALLY LOOKS GOOD AND NOT LIKE A LITERAL MONSTER
i wasn’t sure how id feel about them showing the air nomad massacre but i think the importsnt thing is that they showed it was a massacre - and that although they can defend themselves, they don’t have the ability to fight back like an organised army would bc they’re pacifists! they attacked a peaceful group
the abandoned fire nation ship in the southern water tribe looks so fucking cool
ARTIST ZUKO???!!! LETS GOOO
Dallas does an amazing job at getting across Zuko’s intense desperation
I actually ended up loving all the Sokka and Suki interactions sm it was so cute and wholesome
Katara is perfect i will kill and die for her
Azula’s opening scene being her manipulating those people trying kill ozai ultimately leading them to getting burned alive by him and smiling - literally so fucking good. she is the best villain in history of forever
really good move having the mechanist (Sai!) and Teo be in Omashu imo. having them destroy the northern Air Temple so carelessly always pissed me off
THE FREEDOM FIGHTERS ARE LITERALLY PERFECT I AM SCREAMINGGGG
I was wondering how they were going to introduce the Mechanist and Jet in a limited amount of episodes but I like how they combined the two stories
Also Sokka absolutely nerding out in the Mechanist’s home is so important to me
Zuko getting has ass beat by that lady for fighting Aang is literally so funny and reminiscent of the goofy aang vs zuko fights we see in season 1 (to be clear: i adore zuko. this is NOT hate on him)
Zuko losing shit about his notebook and trashing his room and then outing himself as a fire bender in Omashu is so perfect. god i love him so much. it’s very season 1 zuko. it’s giving I DONT NEED ANY CALMING TEA!!!
things i was not a fan of: (some of these are a little pedantic i’ll admit)
Exposition is a little is a little janky but i’ll forgive it i guess bc at least it isn’t egregious as The Movie That Shall Not Be Named
Aang leaving just to get fresh air/clear his head and intending to come back is a silly change to me. all i keep thinking about is the storm where we got those epic Zuko and Aang parallels which now doesn’t really work and also takes away a lot of Aang’s depth. A good change adds to the story, but personally this seems to take it away
WHY would they not make Katara the one to bring him back from the avatar state? just seems like a strange choice to me? not saying this from a shipping point at all but that moment is a big step to their bond/friendship especially since they have only just met
Still don’t understand why they made the head of the village Suki’s mum. like i don’t think it’s a terrible choice but they still could have let them have a mother/daughter bond but still let Suki be the leader without any implications of nepotism. it mostly seeems silly
tl;dr - really enjoying it so far!
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bridoesotherjunk · 2 months ago
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Okay, so it's been a handful of days since I've seen Venom 3.. and I think I've finally got my thoughts together.
This review will have spoilers, so it will go under the cut.
these are all my opinions, so don't take my word as gospel or anything...
Anyone who knows me and my blog knows how much I've loved these movies since 2018, so to see me not ranting about the third Venom movie should be evidence enough how I feel.
I... don't feel like this was a satisfying conclusion to the Venom franchise. I really feel like there was so much more that could have been done, and should have been, instead of what we got.
I truly feel that introducing Knull into the story was a mistake. The first 2 films were so much smaller scale. Expanding all the way to the fucking symbiote god after only having done Carnage just felt like such a massive leap. And they really didn't do much with him anyway.
It felt like they included Knull because they were obligated to. Like Sony made them in order to have a weird spin off involving Knull trying to kill stuff. I don't know. He didn't do much besides tease future movies where he's the villain again. And that's kind of boring...
I will sound so narcissistic saying this, but I truly feel that the story I came up with, where the villains of Venom 3 are former Life Foundation employees angry at Eddie for ruining their lives, made way more sense. In terms of scale, you know? Much less "huge universal threat" and more of the small scale "threat to Eddie and Venom specifically" type story. Even Riot, being a threat to the Earth, was smaller scale than Knull. Knull is just too much. Too big. Too unfocused. It felt like too wide of a net. It felt generic, i hate to say it. It just felt like every other dumb ass gritty movie where the bad guy wants to destroy all life as we know it. (And quite frankly, he could have been taken out of the movie and not much would have changed. Venom and Eddie could have been hunted by the xenophages for any number of reasons.)
The part of the movie that I enjoyed most was the beginning. The part that felt like Venom. Where we saw Eddie and Venom working in sync to free those dogs. I loved that. I loved seeing how far the two of them have come and how well they work together. .. seeing their journey in a montage later? That felt... lackluster. After seeing them literally working together just an hour earlier in the movie, it felt kind of cheap. The way the story ended for these two didn't feel like a victory. It felt like the Avengers Endgame "well we gotta get rid of this character because their contract is up" situation.
The movie was definitely a fun time. I enjoyed myself watching it. But I was left feeling a sense of "That's it?" That I haven't felt since Avengers Endgame.
I'm happy that Tom Hardy got to do these movies. I absolutely will forever adore the first 2. They're fun, they're goofy, they're gay, and I love them. .. but this third one just... yeah. I'm disappointed.
I will always love Venom. That much is not going to change. I love these two gay losers and I'm so happy I got to have them in my life. They brought me so much joy, and so much brainrot, and I will miss the fuck out of them.
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willowed-wisp · 26 days ago
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sweethearts [ johnny ‘soap’ mactavish ]
johnny ‘soap’ mactavish x f!reader
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You had known him forever. Since nursery school and all the time in between.
John MacTavish- though, you called him Johnny. And in later life, that turned into calling him ‘Soap’.
He had been gunning for that uniform since you were 15 and he was 16… falsifying his age only to fail miserably.
It was culture shock to when he left when he was 18… he was your first friend, first kiss, first young love. Yet, it was nothing official. Just two best friends experimenting with each other. You couldn’t have asked for a better person.
You were there when he came back- more of a man than the boy who left. All of him larger than before even that indicative smile. But HE hadn’t changed, still the same snack eating, football loving Scotsman.
That meant your attraction for him was worse than ever- having been in love with Johnny for most of your life. His sky bursted gaze enough to drive you crazy.
Someone like him would never feel the same about you- strictly friends.
Mates who got mistaken for boyfriend and girlfriend most days of the week. Neither of you minded it but it was always you who persisted the, ‘as if… he drives me insane…’ the pining kind of insanity.
His return led you to distance yourself, an insecure freshly turned 18 year old, distracting herself from the boy next door. Johnny could do much better for friends than you, he was the youngest SAS recruit to pass the selection.
HE COULD DO MUCH BETTER THAN YOU.
You didn’t even go say goodbye to him when he left for his first mission- somewhere you’d never know.
Instead, he came to you. Stood at your doorstep.
His face gloomy, “So you weren’ even gonna say goodbye?” Not knowing what to do, your shoulders shrugged and silence ensued. “You’ve been off for weeks, when was the last time we had a movie night? Is it because of the training? Me leavin’?”
Fingers picking at your nails; you’d never been nervous around him. But this was the first time seeing him in god-knows how long, when you hadn’t spent a day away from each other. “I don’t know, John- ,”
“You do know and that’s the problem, Y/N, because you won’t bloody tell me what I’ve done wrong,” he spoke harsher than intended, regretting it within an instant as your stepped forward- sizing the six foot something soldier up.
Staring up at him, “Why do you bother with me when you could have anybody around you? I’m not going anywhere with my life!” It wasn’t envy that spurred you on, it was the fact he was going to leave you.
Heartbroken and yearning. Lost without the boy who had always bolstered you up when you had been thrown to the ground.
Johnny’s eyes welled with tears, “What’s made you think that?”
In a whisper, “You’ve just gotten into the fucking SAS, Johnny…”
“So what? I’m still the same guy… nothing’s ever gonna change me… you should know that by now…”
You wanted things to change- the dynamics between you. Before he found somebody who would knock him off his feet and you’d never get the chance.
His fingers trailed your arm, before he cupped your hand. Blue coveted your vision, “Nothing’s goin’ to change us, you’re my absolute best mate…”
Like a dagger, he struck a nerve, “Maybe I don’t want to be your ‘best mate’, I’m sick of pining for you when clearly you’ll never feel the same way,” a quick pause, “Go and find a pretty gir- ,” Before you knew it, his kiss smothered you. More intimate than when you were twelve, with more intent.
Instead of resisting, you caved in. Hands balanced holding his jawline, clean shaven.
Exploring every inch of your body in that hurried kiss. It was better than anything you had dreamed.
Before you pulled away first, “You’re my everything, Y/N…” Thumbs rubbing circles at your waist. “I cannot tell you how long I’ve wanted to do tha’…”
The memory ran writhe in your brain. That was 8 years ago…
Since then you were happily married with a baby on the way. Johnny had been deployed for over a month. Today he was supposed to be returning- from where you didn’t have a clue but he always came home safely.
That’s what mattered.
You expected the phone to start buzzing, the usual unknown number saying to go to the airport. Instead, a knock at the door.
It was like him not to want to run you around pregnant. But it was Simon who answered the door.
Not able to help the tremble. Air caught in your throat, choking on nothing. “He’s not… is he?” Stopping those tears from coming down- clutching your belly.
You’d have fallen to your knees- had it not been for capable hands.
You looked up, blue eyes for days and a face contorted worriedly, “What did you say, to ‘er, LT?” He held you close, but it would never be enough for you. “You and munchkin okay?” He rubbed your large stomach.
You crushed him in your arms. “Darlin’, I’m a bit tender…” Only then did you notice the sling in his arm, a bandage skirting beneath his shirt.
“What happened?” He shook his head, a grin on his face.
One of nervousness, “It could have been a lot worse,” Simon was as gruff as usual. You would never be allowed to know what happened.
“I’m just glad you’re safe and sound,” Thumb rubbing along longer stubble on his cheek, there was more to the story than either him or Simon were telling you. “You too, Si, thanks for taking care of him.” Spoken wholeheartedly, “Dinners on, you can stay if you want?”
He accepted as he usually did. The mood held less tension as time went on. You came to the conclusion that you were lucky to have Johnny in front of you, laughing at some stupid dad joke Simon said.
All you did was sit there, looking at the guy you had loved all your life.
Your Johnny…
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I contemplated 💀 Johnny but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. He’s just too sweet and just too tragic to write.
Thank you for reading :) xx
————
masterlist
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childrenofcain-if · 20 days ago
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I just imagine M and Mc hiding their relationship. But Mc is tired of hiding their relationship.
So M mom came to visit. But they see Mc with them like in the library and their mom asked who Mc is. But M says it just a classmate. So Mc just gets up and leaves bc they are upset and tired of hiding it from everyone.
I love angst but also happy endings lol 😅
the library’s quietness made every sound feel amplified: the scrape of a chair leg against the wood, the rustle of paper, the soft thunk of a book closing. outside, the rain fell in a misty drizzle, greying out the world beyond the arched windows. inside, the air smelled like varnished oak and old pages—warm and slightly bitter, like nostalgia and lost time.
you were sitting across from M at a heavy oak table, your chair tilted back, your arms crossed, watching them skim through their textbook with the air of someone who could afford to procrastinate with little to no repercussions.
their white cotton button-up looked softer than it had any right to be, and their voice carried the crisp, posh edge that always made your chest feel simultaneously lighter and heavier.
you were talking about nothing too important. a class project, the weather, the coffee at the campus café—whatever you could use to fill the space between the silence and everything you weren’t saying. you’d gotten good at filling silences like that. M wasn’t the kind of person who left much unsaid unless it mattered. when it mattered, the silences stretched on forever.
the silence was broken this time by the sound of quiet, deliberate footsteps broke the hush of the library. both of you turned as a tall, elegant woman approached; her head wrapped in a patterned scarf which hid her light brown hair, sunglasses perched on her nose like a spy in an old movie.
M’s posture seemed to get even more rigid, their breath catching audibly. “mother.”
crown princess victoria? what was she even doing at yale?
as if hearing your thoughts, her eyes snapped to the table you were sitting on. you saw a faint smile curling up her lips before she made a beeline for you two.
“i assumed you’d be here,” she said, her voice as gentle as it was straightforward. her accent was even more posh than M’s, her vowels clipped just enough to be distinctly aristocratic, but her tone was warm. “how are you doing, max?”
“fine,” M manages through gritted teeth, clearly feeling suddenly cornered.
the crown princess glanced at you, her gaze assessing but not unkind. “and who might you be, dear?”
M froze. you could see the cogs turning in their mind, the panic setting in behind their composed front. you knew it before they even said it.
god, you did know them a little too much.
“just a classmate,” they said too quickly, too stiffly. “we were just working on an assignment.”
just a classmate.
the words landed like a slap and for a second, you just sat there and you stared at them. at the way their fingers curled into tight fists on the table. at the way their voice trembled just enough to sound like breaking glass.
you were waiting for them to take it back, your eyes practically imploring as you looked at their rigid figure.
they didn’t.
“right,” you said, your voice colder than you meant it to be. the room felt too small, the air too chilling. “i think you can finish the rest of ‘assignment’ on your own.”
M’s eyes flicked to you, umber brown eyes wide and pleading, but you were already standing, shoving your chair back with a scrape that cut through the library’s silence like the crack of a whip. you couldn’t look at them anymore. you couldn’t stay.
“excuse me,” you muttered, and before either of them could say another word, you were gone.
***
you didn’t go far. the courtyard was empty, the rain now just a faint mist clinging to your skin. you sat on the low stone wall that bordered the garden, staring at the grey sky. the cold seeped into your clothes, but you didn’t care. it was better than the heat that had been rising in your chest, the burn of humiliation and hurt.
you weren’t actually mad at M. not really. or maybe you were, but not in the way you should have been. what hurt wasn’t the lie—it was the fact that it wasn’t surprising.
see, there were many different ways you could kill someone you love. the slowest one was to not love them enough.
not loving you enough to be open about you. not loving you enough to be truthful about you. not loving you enough to love you without secrets.
you’d known what you were getting into when you fell for M, with all their responsibilities and their protocol and their impossible life. you’d known, but you’d let yourself hope anyway.
you shouldn’t have. hope has always been a dangerous thing for you to have.
***
inside the library, victoria turned to her second-born, one perfectly sculpted brow arched.
“max, darling,” their mother called out softly.
M didn’t respond, their gaze fixed on the door you’d disappeared through.
“max,” she said again, more firmly this time.
“what?” they turned sharply, their voice sharper still, though the anger wasn’t directed at her. it was directed at themself, at their stupid, cowardly mouth and the way they’d let the words spill out like oil on water.
“just a classmate?” she repeated lightly, her tone mild but pointed.
M avoided her hazel gaze, staring down at their hands as if they might find an escape route in the folds of their sleeves.
“it’s... complicated,” they finally said, their voice low.
victoria hummed, a sound that managed to be both understanding and disapproving.
“darling,” she said after a moment, her voice softer now, “i know that look in your eyes. it’s the same one your father had when he looked at me.”
M’s head snapped up, their eyes communicating their surprise. “mother, i—”
“you love them, don’t you?”
M recoiled as though she’d struck them.
“i—no—” they started, but the words caught, crumbled.
they couldn’t deny it, at least not completely. their hands clenched into fists on the table, their knuckles white.
victoria’s voice was gentle as she spoke up again, but there was steel beneath it. “i know what it’s like to love someone who doesn’t fit the mold, someone the world says you shouldn’t love. you know your father wasn’t born into this world of titles and palaces. do you think i didn’t face the same choice you’re facing now?”
M swallowed hard, their throat working against the lump rising there. “it’s not that simple.”
“no,” victoria agreed. “it’s not. it never is. but the important question is, what are you going to do about it?”
M lifted their gaze to look at her and they saw it. the quiet rebellion in her gaze, the echoes of every choice she’d made to be where she was now. they would feel the presence of it around her most of the time, but this time it seemed almost amplified.
she reached out, covering their hand with hers. “go after them, darling. don’t let fear ruin what you’ve found. if it’s worth it—and it is—you fight for it. and i promise i’ll fight with you, when the time comes.”
***
you heard the footsteps before you saw them, quick and unsteady on the wet pavement. M appeared, breathless, their hair damp from the mist. they looked disheveled in a way that was wholly unfamiliar, their usual gracefulness replaced by something akin to desperation.
“i’m sorry,” they said, their voice breaking the moment they reached you. “i’m so sorry.”
you didn’t look at them. “for what? for lying to your mother? or for pretending i don’t really matter?”
“for all of it,” M said, their voice heavy with guilt. “for being a coward. for making you feel like i’m ashamed of you.”
you turned to face them, your arms crossed tightly over your chest. “and are you?”
“no.” the word came out with more force than you expected. M stepped closer, their umber brown eyes searching yours. “never. you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
“i’ve been so afraid,” M admitted, hands clenching at their sides. “of losing you. of what my family would think. of the world tearing us apart. but i was wrong. i realize that keeping us a secret was hurting you even more.”
“i can’t keep doing this, M,” you said quietly. “i can’t keep feeling like i’m a secret to be kept forever.”
“you’re not a secret,” M said, stepping closer still. their hand brushed yours, tentative and warm. “you’re an oath. something i swore to protect, not hide. and i promise you, that’s going to change. my mother knows now, and soon, everyone else will too. i won’t let anyone take this away from us. from you.”
you searched their face, looking for cracks in their resolve, but all you saw was sincerity. slowly, you nodded, the tension in your chest loosening just slightly.
“all right,” you said softly.
M’s shoulders sagged with relief, and they took your hand, their grip firm and grounding. “thank you, meri jaan. i won’t let you down.”
you gave them a faint smile, your heart still aching but just a little lighter as you pressed a chaste kiss to their cheek.
“so,” you said after a moment, your voice tinged with wry humor, “am i supposed to meet your mother now?”
the corner of M’s lips quirked into a faint, shy smile. so unlike them, but it was endearing all the same. “if you’re up for it.”
you raised an eyebrow. “shouldn’t i be a little concerned about the fact that the crown princess of england is wandering around without bodyguards?”
“oh they’re here alright,” they said, their tone dry but also tinged with suppressed laughter. “they’re just good at being invisible. and besides, do you really think americans would recognize her under those sunglasses and all those scarves?”
you laughed then, soft and warm, and to M, it felt like the sun breaking through the clouds after a rainy day.
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m0nsterqzzz · 10 months ago
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Happy Wife Happy Life
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pairing: Clarisse La Rue x fem!reader
summary: being Clarisse's "wife" will always have it's perks
a/n: honestly don't know how to feel about this but I'm tired. anyway, kinda hate the ending. and my writing lol.
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Love is the greatest thing.
At least, in your eyes it is.
It can bring the strongest people to their knees, risking their lives or others lives just so that they can keep their person happy. It's always been amazing to you.
Not so much in your best friend Clarisse's. She'd much rather have the glory of being the strongest kid in school, or be feared by your classmates. "Love is stupid." She always tells you while she watches you study under the willow tree she likes climbing.
"No, it's not. It's powerful. You like powerful things don't you?" You'd say back with an airy laugh, then forcing her to come back down from the branches so you can help her with her math homework.
She's heard lots about the emotion called jealousy, but she'd never truly felt it until she saw Holly Bracken kiss your cheek during recess one day. The tightening of the chest, the way her throat went dry and she clenched her fist by her side from the other end of the black top and tried to stop herself from throwing the basketball in her hands towards the blonde girl's head. It wasn't a feeling Clarisse liked, and the feeling only went away when you were laying in her arms under the tree after school that day.
That warm afternoon, she'd asked you to marry her with a paper ring, one that you cherished for a whole week until it got caught in something and broke. You'd obviously said yes, the fact that you had a huge crush on her not exactly helping as you forced yourself to remember she was obviously kidding. Sealing the marriage with I do and then placing a chaste kiss on the back of your hand like she'd seen done in the romantic movies her mother likes watching, you were officially hers. As long as you were her wife, Holly Bracken could no longer kiss your cheek with that ugly smug smile.
She went on to make sure of that, introducing you as her wife to anyone and everyone that was willingly to listen. You two were young, and nobody took it quite seriously until she saved up almost a full year's allowance money to buy you a nice looking- but still cheap- promise ring from the jewelry store downtown. It was a silent promise, one that she eventually voiced as you were sleeping over at her house.
"I'll be with you forever." She'd whispered in your ear, and you foolishly believed her.
She was gone three weeks later.
You didn't get a phone call, an email, or even a letter. She just....disappeared.
Her family stopped answering the door for you, seemingly purposefully avoiding you in town. It was months before you finally gave up, and it was obvious to anyone that looked hard enough you were slowly becoming a shell of yourself without her. Without your girl.
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
The only thing in your life that is weirder than Clarisse's mysterious disappearance, was the fact that a boy just told you you're a child of one of the Greek gods. You couldn't believe him. You'd learned about the gods in school, but there was no fudging way they were real. You'd only finally agreed to go to some place called Camp Half Blood when he rolled up one of his pant legs to reveal furry goat legs. Nothing will ever be weirder than that.
Just in time too, because right after you left the school building and started sprinting towards the forest across from the place, some giant winged creature that no one else seemed to see crashed through a window and started flying towards you.
Your protector, someone you learned is a satyr named Joey, lead you to camp with minimal death, which you learned is very rare when it comes to leading a demi-god to camp. It didn't help with the newly installed fear inside you, but you just simply nodded along with what he was saying as your eyes scanned the crowds of campers that are doing their own thing below the hill you stand on.
The moment you step past what Joey calls Thalia's tree, all eyes are on you. A new camper means special events so they feel welcome which means more fun for the campers and the drama of figuring out who their godly parent is. 
You don’t have any belongings other than the clothes on your skin and the school pencil that’s brought you a strange sense of comfort on your long trip. A female camper with blonde hair and gray eyes comes up and introduces herself as Annabeth, helping you to the “Hermes” cabin to give you a camp t-shirt and new pants. She explains all the new campers go there, at least until they get claimed, which means the kids in there are either children of Hermes, unclaimed, or new just like you. 
Since everyone is gone doing daily activities, you decide to just change in the cabin. It’s peaceful, the sound of campers laughter, birds in the trees.
Your blissful silence is broken when someone tightly wraps their arms around you from behind you and lifts you up in the air with a squeal, your hands flying to cover your bra-covered chest. “What the hell?!” You scream, but the profanities you were going to yell out die down in your throat when the person sets you down and you turn around to see Clarisse.
She doesn’t look much different, her hair a little bit grown out and her band t-shirts and jeans have been replaced by camouflage pants and an orange camp half blood shirt similar to the one you’re trying to put on. You’re so starstruck that you just stare, her arms still loosely wrapped around your waist as you stand there in only a bra and jeans. “Clar?” She nods, grinning brightly as she pulls you into yet another hug.
You’re much more aware this time, pushing her away harshly as you hurry to put on the shirt and then leave the cabin with a quick roll of your eyes. The curly haired girl is hot on your tail, attempting to grab your wrist to stop you before you pull it away as if she’s burned you. Her face is full of hurt, but your voice shows the same amount as you ask, “Why didn’t….why didn’t you call? Or email? Or-or send me a fucking letter? Just to let me know you were okay? That you came here.”
She sighs, eyes full of regret as they fall to look at her doc martens so she doesn’t have to see your sadness. “I couldn’t call you because a phone call is like sending a message out to any monsters that could be listening and find out where we are. Email, I don’t have any electronics cuz of the whole call thing.”
“And letter? I bet monsters don’t know how to read Clar.” The girl is silent for a minute, and as the silence continues is when you realize she doesn’t have an answer for you. You scoff, beginning to walk to who knows where again before she runs to catch up with you.
“I’m sorry, okay? I was scared. Gods, I was scared.” The worlds tumble out of her mouth before she can stop them, and the campers around you fall silent as they stare with mouths agape in shock.
“Scared? What’s there to be scared of? It’s just me.” She nods, wordlessly reaching out to hold your hand. You let her this time and she feels relief flood through her. “Scared. I was scared….scared that you would hate me for leaving. I mean, what kind of woman leaves her wife?” She attempts a small laugh, and she takes it as a win that the corners of your mouth twitch upwards in the start of a smile. “I promised you forever and then left without another word. You had been looking at me through rose colored glasses our entire lives, I was scared those glasses were shattered. It’s not an excuse though. I should’ve sent you a letter, told you I was okay and told you how much I missed you.”
A small smile works its way onto your face, but she can still see the sadness in your eyes and she hates it. She hates it when you're sad. “Come here angel.” The girl hesitantly pulls you into her arms, almost crying when you relax into her hold and hug her back before she remembers where you guys are and how many campers are staring in shock at how sweet she’s acting.
“You have to understand that I’m still mad Clar. Even if you were scared, I spent years living in fear you were dead.” You mumble against her shoulder as you grip onto her like she’s going to disappear again if you let go.
The girl nods in agreement, cradling your head to her chest as she glares at the campers in an attempt to get them to leave you two alone. They do it.
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
Clarisse brings you to her cabin, cuddling with you in her bed as she tells you anything and everything that has happened over the past. She’s a child of Ares, and you spend several minutes that it makes sense after the amount of times she threatened other kids by saying she should hang them from the top of the flagpole. 
By dinner time, it’s like no time has passed, and everyone’s eyes are on you as you two walk in with her arm casually placed on your around the back of your waist as she leads you to her table where her siblings are trying not to make fun of her. After a lot of begging and threats, Chiron agreed to let you sit at the Ares table for your first week at camp. “Hey guys.” Her happy tone is a rare one around her by the look on their faces, the smile even rarer as she sits you down next to her spot on the bench. “This is my wife.”
The whole room goes silent, all eyes trained on you as your eyes dart up to stare at her. “What are you-” She cuts you off with amusement dancing in her brown eyes.
“What do you want to eat, honey?” Clarisse asks you, and a son of Ares you know as Mark scoffs before he says, “The last time I asked you to get me food, you poured your drink in my lap and told me it wasn’t your job.”
The smile falls from your friend's face as she glares at him. “That’s because it isn’t my job.”
“Then why are you getting her food?” 
“Because a happy wife equals a happy life alright? Now shut the fuck up.”
The smile is back as she turns to face you again, taking your order before she leaves to get that and her own food. 
The rest of the campers go back to their meals, though they’re clearly gossiping about Clarisse’s supposed wife as they eat. It doesn’t make you feel very happy, but all the doubt is gone as your girl comes back and sits down next to you, setting the food down before her hand falls to hold your hand under the table the way she used to during lunch at school.
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
A little bit later, you finish eating and join in the group of campers leaving the dining hall towards the campfire with Clarisse walking beside you. “My legs hurt.” You mumble while leaning closer to her. She doesn’t miss a beat as she picks you up bridal style, casually carrying you to the bonfire like you weigh absolutely nothing. Smiling at the sound of your laughter, she sets you down on one of the logs surrounding the fire. “What was that for? I could’ve walked.” You say as she sits down next to you before pulling you into her lap.
“What kind of wife would I be if I let you walk around while in pain?” She grins before leaning her head on your shoulder. She seems happy, and you recently learned she hasn’t felt that way in a very long time so you simply smile before leaving a kiss on her forehead. Her fingers lace with yours, her thumb caressing the back of your hand as she talks to her brother. It’s like no time has passed. Although you’re still upset, it’s nice to have her again.
Clarisse makes you guys some smores, a few people coming up every once and a while to introduce themselves and your friend introduces you the same way every time; “This is my wife.” By the time you’re making your way to the Hermes cabin with her walking by your side like a bodyguard, everyone in camp is aware of the “marriage”.
“I wish you could come stay in the Ares cabin.” She mumbles into the crook of your neck on the porch of Hermes cabin, and you chuckle while rubbing circles on her back. “I think you annoyed Chiron enough for one day.”
The daughter of Ares sighs, reluctantly nodding as she gives you a gentle squeeze before walking away. You watch her walk to her cabin for a few seconds, a permanent smile on your face before you walk inside your crowded cabin.
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
The next morning, it’s time for you to join in the routine of chores and training. It seems tiring, but Clarisse is by your side to help you with anything and everything so it’s okay.
“You’re getting better, hon.” She repeats for the 100th time in an hour, and your trust in her words is slowly fading as you sling the sword in your hands awkwardly towards the dummy covered in greek armor in front of you. The girl seems to notice your mood dropping, so she sighs and then stands up and walks towards you. You think she’s going to tell you to take the armor off just stop trying, but you shouldn't have. Clarisse was never one to tell you to give up on something. Instead, she places her hands on your hips, brown eyes straying from your face as she gently moves your body until you're standing in the correct way. You feel like clay under her grip, simply allowing her to position you as your face scans her features. 
It’s like something pulling you to lean in, and it’s only when you're inches away from her face do you realize she is leaning in too. As if realizing where you are and what you guys are doing, she clears her throat and backs away, her hands following to rest at her sides. “There. Try again.” She begins to awkwardly walk away, her confidence gone as she almost trips over some armor left on the floor by another camper.
You nervously laugh, taking a deep breath before you slash the sword forward again. The sword feels much more natural in your hand, and it’s almost like an instinct as you angle it so it hits the unprotected parts so it cuts open the material. 
Your friend cheers, rushing over to you and easily lifting you off the ground like you just won the olympics. Clarisse has always been that way, proud of every thing  you could ever do. With a small laugh, you thank her and finally get her to set you down. “Well done wifey.” The words flow out of Clarisse’s mouth like they’re the most natural thing, and you fake an annoyed sigh.
“You know I’m not your wife right?” You say with a laugh, but she clearly doesn’t find it very funny.
“Then what's this?” Her hand moves to grab your hand, holding it up in front of your face and you try to ignore the way butterflies explode in your stomach from the touch as her eyes lock on yours. With rose colored cheeks- you decide to blame it on the heat and not the feeling of her hand in yours- you finally take notice of what she’s talking about; the ring she bought you when you were kids, snuggly placed on your left hand ring finger. It was a bit too big when you guys were younger, but it fits basically perfectly now.
“It’s a promise ring.” You mumble, walking away to take off the armor and put away the sword. “It’s the closest thing to a wedding ring I could get. And besides, red is my favorite color, the jem is red. It’s basically me, in a ring.” “I didn’t understand a single thing you just said.”
Clarisse sighs, wrapping her arms around your waist from behind the same way she did your first day at camp- though this time she doesn’t lift you up. “Sorry. Let me summarize. You’re my wife, and that is your ring.” You chuckle, turning around in her arms and trying not to think about the way you’re so close you can feel her warm breath on your face. “Fine. I’m your wife.” She takes the win, leaving a chaste kiss on your cheek before she makes her way out of the training grounds to go wash up for lunch.
This girl is gonna be the death of you.
 -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
That night, Clarisse sneaks into the Hermes cabin. She’s used to sneaking out, but she’s never had a reason to sneak into this specific cabin and she almost bursts out laughing when she gets through the window and almost steps on a kid laying on a sleeping bag on the floor. 
She easily manages her way through the sleeping kids to get to your bunk in the corner, cringing every once and a while when floor boards creek. You’re awake, staring at the wall and you reach under your pillow to grab a dagger Annabeth gave you when someone puts a hand on your shoulder and tries to shake you away so you can hold it up against their neck.
“Why the hell do you have a knife to my throat?” Clarisse quietly squeaks out, and you sigh in relief before putting the weapon back under your pillow for safe keeping. “I just…I’m sorry.” You think about telling her about the nightmare you were having not even ten minutes ago, but it looks like she’s already aware of it as she sends you knowing eyes.
“You can make it up to me by following me.” One look into her pleading eyes is all you need to reluctantly agree, and she helps you out of the window and then onto her back so she can carry you to the surprise she set up in the forest.
The sight makes you want to grin and cry at the same time; it’s a picnic set on the cliff overlooking the waterfall you told her was your favorite part of camp, all your favorite foods from the outside world placed accordingly on the blanket. There are little lanterns placed all over, lighting up this specific part of the woods. You can clearly see the stars, one of your favorite things, and the cozy feeling of the date-like setting goes against the summer breeze of the night.
“So? What do you think?” Clarisse nervously asks as you look around in awe. “I….I love it Clar.” You reply, pulling her into a tight hug. “How’d you get all these foods?” You quest with a grin. She innocently shrugs, but she’s got a mischievous look in her eyes that only appears when she does something bad. She won’t tell you that she snuck out of camp the same way she snuck out of her cabin to go to the mortal world, sneaking back in a throwing herself into a bush when Mr. D almost caught her.
She sits down on the blanket, patting the spot next to her and then pulling you into her lap when you sit down. “This is so nice….but why?” “Why?” “Why’d you do it?”
Clarisse chuckles; “Because my wife deserves best.” There it is again, the phrase that brings a blush to your face no matter how many times you hear it. “Well, thank you.” She nods, grabbing a chocolate covered strawberry and taking a hesitant bite before humming in satisfaction. “That’s really good.”
You two spend the rest of the night talking and giggling as you cuddle up to her and eat the delicious foods, and by the end of the night you’re lying with your head in her lap as she runs her fingers through your hair. “One day,” She starts, leaning down to kiss your forehead before she continues speaking; “I’m gonna marry you for real.”
With a small laugh, you nod, staring into her brown eyes as you sigh. “I’m okay with that.” You whisper, and for a second it seems like she’s leaning down again. It’s proven she is when her lips connect with yours. Her lips are slightly chapped since she always forgets to put on chapstick before she leaves the cabin, but that doesn’t matter as she’s kissing you like she’s been starved for years. Technically, she has been.
She pulls away, watching with a nervous smile as you attempt to catch your breath and stare up at her in awe. “Was that-was that okay?” You slowly nod, sitting up and then turning to face her before you grab her face in your hands and kiss her once again. She seems surprised, but she quickly adapts as her hands move to your hips and firmly grip them.
“I’ve been wanting to do that since the day you agreed to be my wife.” She whispers as she pulls away and leans her forehead on your own. You giggle, giving her a quick kiss in between love sick giggles. “Me too.”
She begins to talk again, but the sound of hooves galloping near and a loud voice calling out, “Who's there?!” makes her panic. Chiron. You panic as well, and you both messily pick up the empty plates and blanket, shoving it all in the basket and taking your hand in the one that isn't holding the basket.
The galloping is getting closer, and you both begin to run back into the forest- on the way back to camp but still in the opposite direction of Chiron.
You both begin to laugh as you almost trip over a branch, and you have to bite your lip and hold a hand over Clarrise's mouth so Chiron won't hear. 
You eventually make it back to the cabins, and you both slow down to a light jog as you near the Hermes cabin. She brings you back to the still open window, and helps lift you up into the slightly cold room. You take off your shoes, and are about to wish her a goodnight and go to bed when you turn around to see her lips playfully puckered. 
You chuckle, walking back to the window and giving her a small peck on the lips. “Goodnight Clar. and thank you for a wonderful night.” She smiles. “It was only wonderful because you were there. Goodnight angel.” With that, she leaves towards her own cabin, and you're left staring at her leave with a love sick smile and look in your eyes.
At the edge of the forest, Chiron watches the sweet goodnight with a small smile. “Well I'll be damned….Clarisse La Rue is a softy.” He begins walking to his own cabin with a content sigh. “But they better not sneak out again.”
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loserlvrss · 5 months ago
Text
꒰ 𝐁𝐀𝐒𝐊𝐄𝐓𝐁𝐀𝐋𝐋 ꒱ 钟辰乐
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summary : your boyfriend loved basketball… maybe even more than he loved you. but, that also wasn’t true (mostly)
genre : fluff, comedy, chenle x afab!reader, slice of life tws : language, kissing, pet names author notes : based on personal experience (yeah he’s my bf) word count : 0.7k
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“czennie, this one’s for you!” you shouted, launching the ball in your hands up into the air. unfortunately, you misjudged how far away the hoop was—or maybe you didnt put enough power into the throw—and you missed by a couple of feet. “shit!”
laugher wafted into your ears. “you can’t say that, and then miss, y/n.”
you turned to him, suddenly faced by your boyfriend; who loved basketball almost as much as he loved you. which came first? you, comically, couldn't decide some days. 
“mark did.” you recounted the viral video of one of his best friends. “so, why can’t i?” you pouted out your bottom lip. 
he approached you, picking up the orange ball at your feet on the way. he then held it out to you. “you can do anything but not take basketball seriously, okay?” 
you took it, sticking your tongue out playfully, and lining up for another shot. “you love this sphere more than me, don’t you?” 
his hands caressed yours, breaking your focus, chest pressed to your back. your face started to heat up at the proximity. you could feel his breath fan your neck as he bent down to be at the same eyeline. “look at the middle of the box.” he commented, pulling your fingers apart, and using your wrist to readjust your grip. “and, make sure you follow through.” 
“i’m a lot of things, but a quitter isn’t one.” you admitted, making him laugh. “watch this!” you pushed the ball from your hands, accepting his assistance in making it go farther.
your eyes grew wider, and you held your breath. for a moment you thought the ball was making it into the hoop this time, chenle gasping from behind you. well, that was until it bounced off the rim right back at you.
and, as if it was a comedy, the ball hit you right on the head. you yelped, trying to gather whatever was left of your thoughts. your hands shot up to clutch the area, pain not spreading until a couple long-lived seconds after it bounced off somewhere. now you hoped it would stay away from you forever. 
you cursed your boyfriend and his stupid hobby. you could’ve been wrapped up in his arms on the couch watching a movie. or eating a hard-earned snack. or doing a stupid dog puzzle. anything other than playing a sport in the dead of night, at some janky hole-in-wall-esk court; concrete cracked, hoop hanging on by a (literal) thread. 
but still, you loved him way too much to not indulge his hobbies with him. you loved him so much it outweighed any pain you felt, physically and mentally. 
“oh my god,” chenle choked on a breath—maybe even a small laugh—holding you close to him and rubbing the area that was used as the backboard. 
and, he loved you too much, too. 
“how’d it only hit me?” you mumbled through his arms. “you’re not even inches away from me. a-and your head’s bigger than mine!” 
he let his arms drop to your shoulders, spinning you to face him. he had an amused grin on his face, but a confused twinge to his eyebrows. “what the hell, babe?” 
your hands innocently pleaded. “i’m just saying!” he eyed you curiously, obviously interested in how you’d turn this around. “it’s true, but i love you and your big head. i think it’s cute—i think you’re so cute.” 
apparently, not very far. 
“babe?” you ran for the ball, leaving him in silence. his mouth hung open at your audacity, the antics making you forget all about the dull pain on your skull. “y/n? are you seri—“ 
he was cut off when you charged for the net, shouting. “chenle, this one’s for you!” and throwing the ball upwards in hopes it’d, at least, make it close. you spun around running up to him instead, trying to distract from the fact that the odds weren’t in your favor. 
your body smacked into his, arms around his neck, his finding home around your waist. 
everything was going too fast, he didn’t have a chance to process anything you were doing. however, he found it oddly adorable. 
you pressed your lips to his, but pulled away when you noticed his eyes were wide. he was looking behind you, an arm coming off your hips to point. “y/n, you actually made it…” 
you whipped around so fast it should’ve been dangerous. “really?” you shouted into the cool night air, voice lowering quickly. “i mean, of course i did.” you felt his arms snake around your waist, holding you close like when he was showing you how to shoot the ball—before it fought back. “it was for you, afterall.” 
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reblogs, likes and comments are greatly appreciated! thank u!
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— back to masterlist .ᐟ
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impish-baby · 2 months ago
Note
Hey, could I have more HIWTHI content please? Possibly with them finding out reader would write in their journal a lot, possibly hinting towards reader having large amounts of self worth issues, and instead of them leaving because no one notices them, reader left because they feel like a burden?
I’m particularly interested in Marcus and the twins reacting.
Also, please make sure to take care of yourself. I love all of your writing, but no one will ever blame you for taking a break. Also, please stay hydrated.
-🌙
👀 close to something that would happen canonically actually!!
HIWTHI cast's reaction to reader's journal
(Trigger warnings: reader's struggles with self worth, mentioned/referenced suicide)
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Marcus feels like a complete and utter failure as a father. No matter how cold or stern he is with his children, he does love all of them with everything in him. So the fact that you feel like a burden? That you felt like a waste of space in your own home? He hangs his head in shame.
Doesn't even bother with asking why you didn't speak up, he's well aware that this is his own shortcoming. It's his fault, that's the simple truth of the matter.
Once you are back home, you're required to start therapy. He'll even let you do in person instead of online if you promise to actually give it a shot, Marcus legitimately wants (needs) you to get better. He has no delusions of their being an overnight change, and so he tries to go at your pace.
There's lots of long conversations, firm reminders that you are loved and of value no matter what. Especially at night, he'll sit at the end of your bed and tell you how much you mean to him. He'd go on until he's blue in the face if that's what it takes for you to believe his words.
Clara refuses to believe what she's read for a long while. She knows it's real, she has the proof held in her hands. Just... her child, her baby, was struggling with almost the same thing she was. And she didn't know. She didn't know and now they're gone.
If she wasn't worried about reader before, she's actually terrified now. The worst outcome is going through her mind, because really, what was stopping you from doing something dangerous? Clara is constantly eyeing the news, fear eating her alive.
The next time she sees you, you're getting the tightest hug. The woman sobbing into your shoulder, thanking whatever higher being that her baby is safe.
You aren't allowed to have sharp objects, unportioned medication, or anything that could be used to harm one's self anymore. Clara doesn't care, she's not leaving a chance. She knows what it's like being in that state of mind. She'll be dammed if she doesn't start acting like a mother should and protecting her child.
Jack is bawling his eyes out right away. The pen ink in your diary smudging as his tears hit the paper. You...oh god..
He feels like the shitiest person on earth, he doesn't deserve to call himself an older brother. He knew Jaiden had his struggles, and now this..
He pockets the journal. Jack reads it as some form of punishment. You suffered with this, he'll suffer with it too. When you're back home, he's trying his best to include you in everything.
Movie nights, board games, he comes up with anything and everything so you can spend time together. See? He has fun with you, he likes hanging out with you, you aren't a burden..
Theo feels bitter, resentful. At your parents, at themselves, at the fact that you felt that way. His resolve to find you becomes ten times stronger, there isn't a single doubt in their mind that you need to come home.
Much like Marcus, they'll affirm how much you're loved and wanted any chance they get. Theo cages you in their arms and mumbles praises for what feels like forever. They'll even go into morbid detail about how everyone fell apart while you were gone just to prove how needed you are.
Jaiden is tempted to rip the pages out. He goes through a rollercoaster of emotions.
At first, he's pissed. That you didn't say anything, that you didn't do anything to get help, that you just sat there and felt fucking miserable for years-
He's ashamed. Deeply, deeply ashamed.
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It feels.. awkward between you. Jaiden stares constantly, like he's never seen you before. When he finally breaks down sobbing, he's willing to beg at your feet if you'd forgive him for being such a horrible big brother
185 notes · View notes
isaacarellanesismyhusband · 5 months ago
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★ fluff | † angst | ‡ sad | !! suggestive
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‼️THIS MASTERLIST IS NOT GONNA BE UPDATED ANYMORE, PLEASE CHECK THE MEGALIST ↓↓↓‼️
¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡ megalist ¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡
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Isaac Garcia (mlwtwb)
playing with his hair ★
unconsciously smiling whenever she smiles ★
drunk ★
y/n(she/her) finds Isaac drunk on the front porch
(i have more of Isaac on my wattpad but i won't pot them here so u can check them out on there if you want)
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Lee Garcia (mlwtwb)
teacher ★
Lee teaches y/n (she/her) how to skateboard
first kiss ★
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Draco Malfoy (harry potter) +check the other masterlist too
september back to Hogwarts-writing prompts
too late ‡
y/n (she/her) who is in her first year at Hogwarts (11y/o) and likes Draco Malfoy who is in his 4th year (15y/o), but Draco tells her that she's too young. this happes every year until y/n turns 15 and stops trying to be with Draco and moves on but Draco realizes that he likes her but it's too late cause she already moved on.
in the shadows †
y/n (she/her) is Professor Umbridge's niece and had transfered to Hogwarts when her aunt got a job as a teacher there but what no one knew is that Umbridge is abusive towards y/n (she uses the same method she used on Harry Potter in the movie: to write something on a piece of paper and it magically engraves on the back of your hand with cuts) for a while no one noticed and thought that she was just shy but one pearson, Draco Malfoy, a fellow Slytherin, noticed her hand one day in potions class and asked to talk to her privetly in the Slytherin common room and that's when y/n opens up about the abuse and that's when she finds out that Draco had took a notice of her ever since she arrived, but she didn't notice because of her shy and scared demeanor.
in your arms ★
y/n (she/her) is Draco Malfoy 's girlfriend and one night Draco show's up at her house and he ends up spending the night there, with him cuddled up in her arms crying after he told her that he was forced to join the death eaters.
"it was nice knowing you!" †
bully †
y/n (she/her) tries to take her life after Draco bullies her, but little does she know the reason of the bullying is for him to hide his actual feelings for her.
alphabet nsfw headcanons !!
lazy day headcanons ★
first kiss ★
y/n (she/her) having her first kiss with Draco
kisses ★
you don't have to go ★
y/n(she/her) stops Draco in the battle of Hogwarts
one day at a time †★
y/n(she/her) losses her mom in the battle of Hogwarts and Draco is there to help her get through the grief
wildflowers ★
i could stay here forever ★
you and Draco have been sneaking off to the library to study together, but it always ends up with him pulling you close between the dusty bookshelves, stealing kisses and making you giggle as he murmurs sweet nothings in your ear.
you have no idea how much you mean to me ★
Draco loves taking you on secret walks around the Hogwarts grounds after curfew. Under the soft glow of the moon, he wraps his arms around you, his cold demeanor melting away as he admits how much you mean to him.
but you had fun, didn't you ★
it’s winter at Hogwarts, and you’ve convinced Draco to join in a snowball fight.
well, that didn't go as planned ★
during potions class, Draco helps you brew a tricky potion, but it ends in a harmless explosion. Covered in glittering mist, he laughs for the first time in front of everyone, holding your hand under the table and whispering that it was worth it just to see you smile.
shall we? ★
Draco asks y/n(she/her) to the Yule Ball
dating Draco Malfoy headcanons ★
worth it ★
Draco is a prefect and finds you out at night
i can’t believe it ★
you tell Draco that your pregnant and you, bith, break the news to the Malfoys
kissing Draco Malfoy headcanons ★
happy valentine’s day ★
i’m beginning to feel like a rap god… ★
draco with a girlfriend who loves Eminem
see? i told you they’d love you ★
y/n(she/her) a holiday at malfoy manor and Draco's family loves her (especially lucius)
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Harry Potter (harry potter)
september back to Hogwarts-writing prompts
bittersweet goodbye ‡
y/n (she/her) is the only friend Harry Potter had while living with the Dursleys and now they have to say goodbye because Harry is going to Hogwarts.
first snowfall ★
it's the first snow of the year at Hogwarts
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Fred Weasley (harry potter) +check the other masterlist too
september back to Hogwarts-writing prompts
you promised, remember? †
y/n (she/her) finds Fred after the battle of Hogwarts
ridiculously in love ★
together at last ★‡
Yn had died years before Fred was even born, she died during her 7th year. So when Fred first sees her he fell in love.
second chances ★‡
after Fred’s near-death experience in the Battle of Hogwarts, y/n(she/her) struggles with the fear of losing him again
too far ★
Fred has always been the king of pranks, but one day he goes a bit too far, and he Fred spends the rest of the day trying to make it up to you with adorable gestures until you can’t help but forgive him.
the kissing booth ★
a bit down ★
after a tough day, Fred surprises you with your favorite sweets from Honeydukes and a cuddle session
you’re completely mad, you know that? ★
y/n(she/her) loves thunderstorms and the rain and always wants to go dance in the rain with Fred, but Fred is terrified of them
it’s okay to be happy, even after everything | p2 | p3 ★‡
i like you, and it scares the hell out of me | p2 ★
all of Fred's life he's hated Slytherins and has always said he would never befriend one much less date one, but reader appears and he starts falling for her while denying it and is maybe a bit of an a**hole to reader because he just doesn't believe he could ever like you, but realizes that reader isn't horrible and that not all Slytherins are monsters, and once they're together everyone teases him about how he would say he would never date a Slytherin but now reader is basically the love of his life
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Cedric Diggory (harry potter)
september back to Hogwarts-writing prompts
first kiss ★
please wake up †‡
y/n(she/her) finds out Cedric died during the Triwizard tournament
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Sirius Black (harry potter)
finding home | p2 ★‡ (platonic)
y/n(she/her) finds out that Sirius Black is her father but he didn't know that, and her mom found out after he was inprisoned, but then she was killed by Voldemort when y/n was a baby and was placed in an orphanage for wizards and witches. and he found out after the battle of Hogwarts (in which he survived) and came to find you and tell you and take you in...
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Harry Potter boys headcanons (harry potter)
how the hp boys would react when they find out you have a crush on them ★
the hp boys help you calm down †
the hp boys find y/n (she/her) crying/hipper ventilating
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Newt Scamander (fantastic beasts/hpu)
september back to Hogwarts-writing prompts
to me, you’re… everything ★
Newt showing his love to y/n(she/her)
good morning, love ★
waking up with Newt
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Stiles Stilinski (teen wolf)
dance in the living room ★
Stiles starts dancing in the living room with y/n (she/her)
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Tony Stark (mcu)
see? not so scary, right? ★
y/n(she/her) and Tony share their first kiss
too late †‡
Tony confesses his love for y/n(she/her), but it's too late
panic attack ★
Tony finds y/n(she/her) having a panic attack
if only... ★‡
y/n(she/her) gets injured and Tony helps her, and y/n confesses her feelings for him but she's too young
princess treatment ★
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tom!Peter Parker (mcu)
i'll always be here for you ★
y/n(she/her) has a panic attack because she was attacked by a villan, but spider-man saved her and brought her home and after spider man left, peter arrived like 2 minutes later and comforted her
cute ★
Peter tries to ask y/n(she/her) out but he gets all flustered and shy and stumbles in words a lot but she thinks it's cute
i’ve never... kissed anyone before ★
both y/n(she/her) and Peter are really shy and awkward and they have their first kiss
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Percy Jackson (percy jackson and the olympians) +check the other masterlist too
mornin ★
waking up in the morning, Percy is still half-asleep, his arm draped lazily over your waist
forehead kisses ★
Percy has a habit of giving you quick, gentle forehead kisses whenever he passes by you
i’m always going to protect you, no matter what ★
during a quest, Percy instinctively steps in front of you when danger arises, his protective nature shining through
i… i hate thunderstorms ★
y/n(she/her) is afraid of thunderstorms. Percy holds her close, whispering that he’ll keep her safe no matter what
even heroes need someone to stand up for them ★
y/n(she/her) gets protective when another camper tries to pick a fight with Percy, stepping in to defend him, much to his amusement
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Timotheé Chalamet +check the other masterlist too
cut ★
y/n(she/her) and Timothée work on a movie together and they have to film a kiss scene
let them know ★
y/n(she/her) and Timothée's seceret relationship is outed by a paparazzo
under the weather ★
Timmy takes care of y/n(she/her) on her period
sleep well ★
y/n(she/her) takes care of Timmy after a long day
book nook ★
Timothée created a cozy reading nook just for you. Filled with fairy lights, plush cushions, and your favorite books, he surprised you with it one evening, encouraging you to pick a book while he read aloud, making the evening warm and intimate
please… don’t give up on us †‡
Timothée watched as everything he once cherished slowly crumbled around him. He saw the hurt in your eyes and knew he was the cause, but the more he tried to mend the pieces, the more it felt like everything was slipping through his fingers
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Finn Wolfhard
i’m lucky to have you ★
y/n(she/her) is on the chubby side and Finn loves that about her and he wants to touch her and hold her and if at any point she is embarrassed or feels insecure about what she looks like he always reassures her and shows her how much he loves her
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Tom Holland
just… a habit †★
Tom finds out that y/n(she/her) s.h. during a interview
you’re my favorite person, after all ★
you’re sitting in your favorite coffee shop, absorbed in a book, when Tom sneaks up behind you and places a cup of your favorite coffee on the table
lights, camera, love ★
y/n(she/her) and Tom go to a red carpet event together for the first time
i’ve got you ★
Tom taking care of y/n(she/her) whilst she's sick
why so shy? ★
y/n(she/her) gets shy and flustered around Tom, and he absolutely loves it
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Walker Scobell +check the other masterlist too
you’re such a goof ★
y/n(she/her) and Walker share a cute momet in the park
pet names ★
Walker can't stop giving y/n(she/her) different pet names
breathe ★
Walker helps y/n(she/her) through an anxiety/panic attack
oblivious ★
y/n(she/her) has a huge crush on Walker and gives his very obvious hints but he is very oblivious
off-camera ★
y/n(she/her) and Walker have their first kiss (off camera)
i just… i like it ★
y/n(she/her) can't help but play with Walker's hair
i love you, you know that? ★
Walker loves kissing you in between takes
i’m fine ★†‡
y/n(she/her) is crying on the beach at night and Walker, Aryan, Leah, Dior and Charlie find and comfort her
you’re the best hugger i’ve ever met ★
y/n(she/her) finally meets Walker and he is, in fact, the best hugger ever
339 notes · View notes
jaylver · 10 months ago
Text
ROCKLAND — P.SH
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synopsis: almost like a nightmare, park sunghoon plagues your present just as much as your past regrets had done. however, this time around, you and him decided to right your wrongs one last time.
pairings: non-idol!sunghoon x afab!reader
genre: exes to lovers, miscommunications, angst, second chance romance
warning(s): profanities, brief mentions of smoking, drinking, partying and alcohol
wc: 8k
a/n: i'm BACK. this has been in the works for far too long because of the constant writer's block so i'm not sure if it's good or not, plus it's my first exes to lovers so please be nice <3 greatly inspired by gracie abram's "rockland", so do give it a listen too! please leave a feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated! muah xx
masterlist | © jaylver all rights reserved.
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If there was one thing you’d regret forever in this lifetime, it would be ending things with the love of your life.
You admit it, you’re selfish. Selfish for wanting to leave the town you grew to hate, selfish for prioritising yourself and chasing your dreams, choosing to leave the people you loved instead. Painted a villain in the eyes of many close to the person you once went home to and even the man himself. But, how could he fully blame you when he was equally selfish too?
Park Sunghoon thought keeping you in the cage of this small town was going to make him a happy man. He often fantasised about the possibility of you and his future together, completely pushing aside the thought of you leaving, until it actually happened.
He was angry. He let himself be consumed by his own feelings and mindlessly projecting his anger and blame on you, while you regretfully did the same.
Pools of tears and venomous words spewed out of impulse left you scarred and broken down. It was a bad ending that you’d see in movies coming to life. The moment you had everything packed and goodbyes said, you figured leaving was for the best, now that your ex hates you and his friends who probably felt the same. 
It was a shame, though. Heading to somewhere far from home with a heavy heart knowing you didn’t have the chance to see him once more. Frankly, you were a coward, and so was he.
That explained why returning back home was the scariest thing you had to face in a while. 
It was ironic, wasn't it? Coming back to the place you wished for years to escape and actually doing so, but eventually having to return after you dropped out of the college that you've been praying and praying to get into, only for it to be overwhelming and the city lights couldn't compare to the starry night of your hometown.
You suppose you got the thing you wanted, but it just wasn't what you imagined.
Freshly twenty-two and out of school, you figured home was what you needed in your next step before deciding if you should re enrol. However, you find yourself not having the guts to face your family and friends, not after the promises turned out to be empty. 
"You should quit smoking," 
Yunjin, your cousin and practically your closest friend growing up, was just a distance away when you spotted her, leaning against her car with a cigarette in hand. You found it amusing how she didn't cave into vapes instead in this day and age. 
"Y/N!" She pushed the bud of her half smoked cigarette into the wall, then started jogging towards you, her dress flowing in the wind and boots making obnoxious clicks against the ground. There was a sense of relief in her eyes, her usual smile that you missed graced your presence. "God, I missed you, things aren't the same without you here,"
In the span of a few seconds of her hug, you took the chance to digest her words. Did that mean the traditions you've upheld are now gone? Parties, trips to the beach, all those? 
"What?"
Yunjin pulled away, still managing a small smile. "I don't think things were ever the same since you left … and after you broke up with Sunghoon,"
You blinked, looking away into the distance. "I don't think I'll be welcomed,"
Yunjin scoffed, slapping your arm and scurrying to get your bags. "Don't say that! So not true. Everyone in the family is waiting for you to be back—"
"And talk behind my back about my failure in graduating? Yeah, no,"
‘‘That’s not going to happen,” Yunjin sighed, struggling with your bags and declining your help, but you still forcefully grabbed some knowing she’d eventually crumble. “I think they’ll get it,”
Would they?
Once you are settled into the car, bags successfully loaded into the trunk, you let yourself melt into the comforts of Yunjin’s passenger seat, finally getting to close your eyes and drift away. You thought it was best before having to face everything and everyone once again.
“What’s your plan now, anyway?”
Without opening your eyes, you envisioned a distant image in your head. “Take my time off and see if I’d like to re enrol or not. If I don’t, I’ll just go plan B,”
“Which is?”
“Accept the job offer in London,”
Yunjin almost hit the brakes out of shock, the news that came from you felt like it had hit her in the face, but somehow, she managed to keep her cool and not get you both killed. “What?” she shrieked.
“What?” you questioned back, sounding nonchalant as if this was just another normal offer that didn’t seem particularly significant. But it was.
“You have a job offer in London and you’re coming back here,”
“I left the city for a reason, it’d be stupid to go to another one right after,”
Yunjin exhaled, blinking in stupor. “Right,”
“How’s … everyone?”
Yunjin knew you weren’t referring to your family. Of course you’d know how your own family was doing, that’s a no brainer. What you were trying to mean was your old friend group. You couldn’t blame them for being mad at you, after all you were only a part of it because of Sunghoon.
“Heeseung’s graduating soon,” this was the first update you’ve gotten from Yunjin after those years away. It took you every will not to ask her about them, but here you were now, finally giving in. “They’re still the same, nothing’s changed,”
“What about him?”
Yunjin seemed hesitant, obviously holding back something that she didn’t want you to know. “I’m not going to explode upon hearing, you know that, right?” you joked lightheartedly, but secretly dreading hearing about him.
“I think he’s seeing someone,”
“Good for him,” 
Would it be a crime to admit that you still missed your ex? Something in you was wishing you could rekindle a connection again now that you’re back, but all that hope shattered. If he had already moved on, why couldn’t you? Even after knowing how he probably hated and resented you for doing what you did, you still couldn’t bring yourself to hate him back. 
“That’s all?”
“You want me to go full crazy ex mode? You’re insane,” you shook your head, smiling a little, hoping Yunjin didn’t notice the speck of sadness swimming in your irises. “Whoever she is, I’m sure that I would like her … if I were slightly nicer,”
She let out a ‘tch’ in response, though grinning. “What are you going to do with them around? There’s no way you’d be able to fully avoid them,”
“What can I do? I’ll just have to coexist.”
Coexist was a funny word. How were you able to do that when you couldn’t even fully get over Sunghoon in the first place? Thinking about meeting him in flesh already made you feel like doubling over and projectile vomit. That was how pathetic you were, what a shame. 
Settling in was easy. It was natural to be back home, way better than being in the noisy city and constantly surrounded by a bunch of fake friends. The question of why you left in the first place started burning your mind as you tossed around trying to sleep, but it only persisted to bug you. Then came the thoughts of Sunghoon and the friends you left behind, which prompted you to be fully awake, sitting up in bed.
It wasn't the greatest idea to reach for your phone and search for his contact name, just to recall the day you deleted his number. Yet, your memory never failed you, remembering the digits like it was first instinct, fingers already typing his number. Your thumb hovered over the green call button, a haze in your mind.
Inevitably, you shut your phone and dug your head into your pillow. He would've laughed then, if he had seen this happen, the exact moment of you almost caving in and finally saying the sorry you never gave him.
The pictures you saw of him on social media here and there made you wonder how he was and if he had already forgotten about you. There were a few recurring appearances of a girl that seemed to linger by his side in group pictures that caught your eyes. Who took your bed when you left? Who laughed at everything that he said? Was it that girl?
Just like the time you first had a crush on Sunghoon, you stayed awake thinking about him, except this time around, you were filled with regret instead of hope. 
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"Heeseung asked me about you,"
Yunjin's random confession in the middle of the day had surprised you. Lee Heeseung, the best friend of your ex who you swore hated your guts, asked about you? Shocker.
"What did you say?"
"I said something along the lines of you figuring out life and just chilling here until the time comes," Yunjin shrugged, and you nodded slowly. "But there's something he said that made me a bit … confused?"
"What?"
"He said they wanted to see you again," 
You raised your eyebrows, a hint of scepticism flashed over your eyes. "They want to see me? Tell me a better joke next time, thanks,"
"I'm not joking! I mean, he did say excluding Sunghoon, but the other guys wanted to know how you were now that you're back," Yunjin winced a little at the mention of your ex, but you waved it off.
"Are they treating me to dinner or something?"
"Well … no. But Heeseung asked me to bring you to their next party, which is in a few days," Yunjin's gaze softened, hand patting your back. "You know you don't have to come if you don't want to. I mean, after all that happened with you and them and Sunghoon,"
You let out a small sigh, absentmindedly fidgeting your fingers. "It's all in the past now. I'm sure Sunghoon has moved on with another girl, and maybe—just maybe—the guys do hate me less."
You never went to that party Yunjin mentioned.
It was hard to admit but you knew, deep inside you, you were afraid, too cowardly to face the people you once knew. Instead, you chose to linger around like a lost soul in a town full of the ghosts of your past. 
It didn't help that the party was also in Sunghoon's house. How did they expect you to go in the first place? You thought you'd never step foot in there after you broke it off with him, and you were adamant on keeping it that way, but your heart got the worst of you.
On the night of the party, you drove around the neighbourhood, eventually stopping across the street of his house. You didn't know what got to you to do so, but you guessed reminiscence and bright lights coming from the house were the reason. The music was loud, people were coming in and out of the house, and the only thing you could think of was him.
That thought alone was enough to have you drive away, leaving the house further and further away into the background just as the memories of him being pushed into the back of your mind.
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Rotting in your bed wasn't how your early 20s were meant to be spent, and avoiding almost everyone most definitely wasn't the case either.
Your family and Yunjin were the only people you saw daily, as for the friends you once had, they were long forgotten or didn't even bother to reach out. Except for Heeseung and the others.
That, to you, was a really funny thing to think about. People who stuck by you after the break up and swore to be your closest friends didn't try contacting you once you moved back, knowing damn well word traveled fast in the town; whereas the friends you thought hated you were the first to reach out.
"I'll go to that party," you said to Yunjin on a sunny afternoon tanning session by the pool, sunglasses sitting on the bridge of your nose, hiding the apprehension in your eyes.
"Really?" Yunjin almost jumped out of her seat. It was a party she had brought up days ago, still persistent on taking you out. At least this time around, it wasn't in Sunghoon's house, but her friend Chaewon's. "That's great! Chaewon and the girls are super nice, you'll love them. Let's pick a nice outfit for you, okay?"
Yunjin was by far the most enthusiastic one between you and her. She was picking out dresses and tops, literally rummaging through your closet for anything, and you had to remind her it was just a college party. So, you settled for a skirt and a plain top. 
"Will you be okay? I'll stick by you," Yunjin had her arms around you, standing by the front door of Chaewon's house, hearing the music blaring from the inside.
"I'm fine—I think I'll be fine—I just don't want to run away from everyone anymore," it was mostly true, you thought it was inevitable to hide all the time, that wasn't how you're going to spend your life living.
"If there's anything, tell me, okay? We'll leave if you're getting sick," Yunjin gave your arm a final squeeze of assurance before crossing the threshold. 
It was the same as every party you've gone to. Loud music, drunk college kids, liquor and beers strayed around, it reeked of your nightmare in a nutshell there. 
Yunjin's friends were all as lovely as she had promised. The host herself was wobbling on her feet but managed to grace you with her humour. There was Sakura and Kazuha that you learned were foreign students. 
Throughout the night, you were stuck by Yunjin, going from circle to circle and introducing yourself or recognising some of your past school mates. But, almost inevitably so, Heeseung, Jay and Jake had made an appearance too.
"Y/N," Jay was the first to call your name, causing you to turn your head at the familiar voice. 
Your thoughts during then were jumbled into a mess. The people you were fighting to avoid were standing in front of you, all of which were much different than the memories you had of them in mind. 
Three of them had grown taller, gained some muscles and matured in many ways. Jay's hair was dyed pink, Heeseung got new piercings and Jake had a tattoo on his finger. It was strange to admit they're the same people you knew despite feeling the complete opposite of familiarity.
"Hey—" you were cut off by Jay closing in and pulling you into a hug, this for once was something you remembered about him.
"We're so glad you're back," he whispered into your hair, squeezing you tight. It reminded you then that you were friends with him and the guys before you even dated Sunghoon, that connection was deeper than it seemed, and for it to be severed just because of a breakup was gut wrenching to realise. "We're sorry, Y/N, we're so sorry,"
His apology was genuine, that's for sure. Once you pull away, you let both Heeseung and Jake take turns to hug you, whispering apologies into your ear. It was odd, to accept their apologies and having to start afresh. You held onto them, just taking it in. To forgive was a big step, but maybe it was your first step.
You sat there, catching up with them and slowly getting comfortable just like the old days. Heeseung graduated and got a good job offer, Jay and Jake were still studying, both of which were in the same university. You were relieved there was nothing too awkward between you and them, or else you would have regretted your choices.
The night continued on with a few small talks and eventually you had to excuse yourself to the toilet. You wondered how Chaewon's house was so big, with halls that seemed to never end, or it could just be the effects of alcohol.
Stumbling around, you held onto the walls, passing by rooms occupied by people probably doing something unspeakable. You thought your peace of mind would be intact until the end of the night, but you were wrong. Upon turning a corner, you froze.
It was Sunghoon. It was him.
Grief was a funny feeling, especially when it comes to someone you once knew. You stared at him and there he was, like a ghost from your past coming back to haunt you. He was the shell of the person you loved, and you couldn't help but grieve the person he once was. What was he like now? 
Before you could even turn around and make a run for it, his wandering eyes landed on you. He had the same thought process as you. Realisation, panic, sadness, confusion all mixed into a heap of feelings. 
Your feet started moving on its own, as you stepped back, he took a step forward. Your breath became ragged, heart thumping hard and blood pumping in your ears. He was nearing, and you were running away, it was the same as before.
"Y/N!" He called out, and all it took was him to say your name again to have you stop in your tracks. Gosh, you were pathetic.
He was standing before you now, closer than he was a moment ago. It was then you realised how much he had changed too. 
He was taller, smile lines etched much deeper into his face, almost changing along the same wavelengths with the others. There was something different about the way he looked at you, however. From love in his eyes that eventually changed into hatred was now filled with longing and confusion.
"Y/N," he repeated, disbelief evident in his voice, as if he couldn't believe you were there. 
"Sunghoon," you blinked, a frown unknowingly making its way to your face. You let a few beats of silence pass, conflicted and nervous. "I—I should leave,"
"No—!" his hand reached out for you, but you didn't feel his touch. He didn't dare to touch you, letting his hand linger before pulling it back to his side. "I mean, you don't have to leave,"
"I thought you hate me,"
Sunghoon's gaze fell to the floor, jaw clenched and eyebrows furrowed. He met your eyes once more. "I should hate you, shouldn't I? But I don't think I do, I never did,"
You blinked, a little surprised, a little hurt. All along he had made you think he hated your guts but he actually didn't? "Oh," you seemed to have lost the ability to talk or to compute a proper sentence.
You thought of the things you wanted to ask him. If he was still angry at you or if things were working for him. But, what came out was the question you've stored in the back of your mind instead.
"Are you with someone new?"
You figured he didn't expect such a question from you, much as you didn't expect yourself saying it. It was an itching thought, one that made you look like a typical ex, but you couldn't help it.
"I'm not," he sounded almost exasperated, as if having to squash down this rumour for the thousandth time.
"Oh … oh," you didn't know what to say, averting your gaze away from him and finding comfort in the wall behind him. 
Sunghoon paused, gaze following yours, looking reluctant whether or not to continue the conversation, but alas, he did. "How have you been?"
"Bad," you laughed a little, and Sunghoon's ears perked at the sound of it that he hasn't heard for ages. "You?"
"I quit skating,"
That was surprising. How could he have? Skating was his dream, his past, present and supposed future, but now, it came crashing down. You didn't know if you should feel sorry for him, as you have been a part of his journey, but one bit of you also seemed to have started mourning the changed Sunghoon that stood before you.
"Why?"
He shrugged, hands slipping into his pocket with a solemn look. "I lost interest. I'm into music now, I'm in a band with the guys,"
You heaved a breath, a deep one. Ironic it was that he was doing music now when he was the one criticising you in the past for wanting to pursue it. Who even was this person? With a new appearance came a new personality, he was much further away than you thought despite the physical distance.
"You've changed," you didn't know what prompted you to say that, maybe it was the disbelief or the denial that he was someone new, but whatever it was, neither of you could deny the fact that he did change. "I'm scared of the person you've become,"
A beat passed, an unreadable expression on Sunghoon's face that you couldn't distinguish even though by now you thought you'd know every one of them. 
"And I'm scared you're still the same."
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Seeing Sunghoon that night seemed to have altered something in your life. Somehow, he was everywhere you went. 
Who was working at the register? Sunghoon. Who was at the park? Sunghoon. Who was at the party Yunjin managed to drag you to? Sunghoon.
It was haunting.
All those little encounters didn't mean you talked to him like normal, though. The awkward tension in the air still remained, seeing each other only reminded you and him both of your pasts, and you hated it. That explained why you were having a hard time seeing him at another party you were at.
Yunjin was much more of a party goer than you expected, and she successfully convinced you to go to all of them. It was fun until you got drunk and started being emotional. Your efforts of hiding from Sunghoon that night failed when he barged into the empty room you were sobbing in, whether it was accidental or not, you didn't know, you wished to not know.
"Y/N?"
His voice brought back the times he called your name. Both the good and bad ones. You stared up at him from the ground, tears welling your eyes. The person you were looking at was someone you thought was a soulmate, but now stood as someone closer to a stranger than a friend.
"W–what are you doing here? Why are you crying?"
The alcohol messing with your brain was processing his words, but what came out from your lips was the total opposite of an answer. "I'm sorry, Hoonie," 
Sunghoon's eyes widened at the nickname, the privilege that only you had. He kneeled down, taking a seat on the ground opposite you, a visible distance in between.
"I hate this—us—I feel like if we gave it one night, to talk, to just feel—you'd hate me less and make it alright," you choked back the sobs building up in your throat, the dizziness making you unaware of how Sunghoon reached out only to hesitate and pressed his hand back to his side. "Just wish that we could fight now, I'd hold you on the comedown …" your voice faltered, head leaning onto the wall.
"Y/N, you're drunk, we can talk this out another day," Sunghoon striped off his jacket and covered your exposed thighs with it. "Just … don't avoid me. I–I don't hate you, I just hope we can have a decent conversation without thinking about the past,"
He admitted it, how the two of you had secretly been thinking about the past, letting it be a big wall in between instead of growing from it. Yet, you could tell the unspoken anger and sadness still lingered, choosing to pour out gradually and unknowingly.
"Bet you wish you never even met me," you started slurring, hand gripping onto his jacket tightly. "I can't blame you, I broke your every heartbeat," your eyes were shut, images playing in your mind, not knowing the saddened look dawning on Sunghoon's face.
"Let's get you back."
In your sleep that night, you saw him. He was there, so far yet so close, and just like reality, he was hard to reach, harder to understand compared to before. He was a knife cutting deep, leaving a mark that constantly reminded you of the past. 
How could you even make everything go back to the way it was?
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Sunghoon was on your front door step the night everyone was out for dinner except you. 
You hadn't expected him to turn up, thinking it'd be you that stood at his doorstep instead as you still had his jacket from that party (which you do not want to think about again).
"Sunghoon. Hey," the door was opened and you leaned against it, trying your best at hiding the hint of pining in your gaze. 
"Oh, hey," he greeted back rather stiffly, dressed in a simple attire with the classic white Lacoste sneakers that he always wore. "I–I wanted to—"
"Take your … jacket?" You cut him off half way, nerves wrecking your brain.
A beat passed, Sunghoom visibly gulped. "Y–Yeah, my jacket,"
"I'll go grab it for you," you jerked your thumb over your shoulder, awkwardly scurrying back in to retrieve his jacket and coming back to see him chewing on his bottom lip, seemingly nervous. "Here. Thanks for it,"
"No problem," Sunghoon coughed, grabbing the jacket but absolutely paying no mind to it. His stare was straight at you.
"That's all, right?"
"Yeah,"
"Yeah," you echoed, hating the sudden rigidness between the two of you. "Bye then, Sunghoon,"
"Bye," Sunghoon said, looking dazed. Weird.
You saw him backing away and decided to close the door, but before you could even do so, a force had stopped you from closing it. Not a force, much rather a hand, his hand. The door was pushed open, and you physically jumped at the suddenness of it. Your eyes met Sunghoon's sorrowful ones.
"Don't push me away, Y/N, not again,"
"Sunghoon," 
He made his way in, closing the door behind him and you let him. Was this seriously happening?
"You said you wanted to give us one night to talk, so I'm here now. I didn't care about the jacket, I cared about you. I hate seeing us like this, it's like we're strangers," Sunghoon let out a frustrated huff, eyebrows furrowed.
"We can't just pretend nothing has happened between us,"
"So you want me to hate you instead? You're saying as if it's easy, Y/N, feelings don't work that way!"
"Then how do we go back to how it was? We can't, that's the truth. You're not the same person I used to know,"
"Cut the bullshit. I'm the same as I was, maybe just a little different than I was years ago, but that doesn't change anything. When does that ever stop you from loving?"
Were you too scared to love?
Sunghoon ran his hand across his face, wetting his lips. "You’re scared of change, and I don’t think that’s something new about you,” 
Ouch.
“But I really wish you could let it all go. I don’t hate you, nor do I harbour any anger regarding the things that happened years ago. It hurts, it did, but seeing you now made me feel the opposite of all those emotions,” Sunghoon took a deep breath in, and you were holding yours. “I think about you a lot, actually. I regretted a lot of the things I said and done, and I wanted to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry for not being there for you and giving you the support you needed. I should've fought for us and not leave, I–I—" Sunghoon choked, unable to hold in his overpowering emotions anymore.
You didn’t say anything, instinctively closing in and pulling him into your arms, letting his head lie on your shoulder, ignoring the feeling of his warm tears soaking the fabric of your shirt. "I'm sorry too, for leaving you so easily,"
You stood there with Sunghoon in your arms, inevitably crying along and sobbing out your own apologies, the ones you had owed him and hidden all these years. He held you tight just as you did, and it felt like the nights he had you in his arms whenever you cried. You eventually calmed down whereas Sunghoon was still composing himself, avoiding your gaze.
You took the opportunity to hug him again, tighter and firmer this time, as if trying to stop him from running away. 
"Can we start over? I don't want us to be strangers," 
You heard a sniffle, then a shaky breath of relief. "I'd love to,"
Pulling away, you locked eyes with him. They were twinkling brighter than the stars in the skies outside, filled with a spark of hope. "I'll make us some hot tea. Do you want to … stay over?"
"Can I?"
"I really want you to."
It didn't take more to convince Sunghoon to stay, all you had to do was ask and he'd listen. 
That night, you and him hid in your room, talking for the whole night until the break of dawn. Nothing about the way he talked had changed, nor his laughter or the crinkles around his eyes when he smiled. He told you about the band and some side gigs, offering to bring you to some too. 
You laid there in bed laughing all night, occasionally peeking over the side of your bed to check up on him who slept on the extra mattress, only to meet his eyes and freeze. 
The red string of fate tying you and him together was beginning to reform.
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Not feeling dread every time you saw Sunghoon was a new start for you. In fact, you were glad to see him. 
The misunderstandings and complexity built up over the years were finally addressed, leaving you to peace and a small hope of rebuilding what you had with him. But you kept that thought away for now, holding onto the pieces you had at the moment.
"Come to one of my gigs," Sunghoon made a trip to your house on a random afternoon, a box of your favourite chocolate covered strawberries in his hand. He never forgot anything about you, didn't he?
"Are you bribing me or asking me?" You said despite accepting the box, your heart squeezing at the thought of him remembering the littlest details about you.
"I'm asking you but also offering a gift," he let himself in, almost like always, and you didn't even notice, just letting him do so. "I saw it and I thought of you so I got it,"
"Thanks," you waved the box a little, setting it down on the table and leaning slightly against it. "You still remember," 
His gaze softened. "Of course I do," his hand by his side was itching to reach out, but it never did, instead, he played it off by giving you a smile. "So, what do you say? This Saturday, watch our gig at the pub," 
"Are you singing?"
"I wish I did," he laughed, and you momentarily recalled the times you had karaoke sessions with him. Curse reminiscence. "I play the bass, Heeseung's the front man," 
You nodded slowly, picturing them as a band and smiling slowly. You've missed them, and it was then when you realised it. "I'll go,"
"Really?"
"Obviously, do you want me to say no?"
"Well, no," Sunghoon chuckled, quite literally unable to hide his excitement from the way he's grinning widely. "I'm just … glad, and surprised, and happy,"
You bit back a smile, shaking your head at him. "Text me the details, will you? I don't want to miss it."
Saturday rolled around quickly. You and Yunjin were sitting in a corner of the pub, beers on the table and whispering gossip about some of your high school classmates. High school might've ended years ago but gossip never stopped.
"Alright, folks, the next act is someone you already know, they are not strangers," the manager of the pub stepped onto the small stage, announcing Sunghoon and the guy's band. "Please welcome … April Nights!"
April? 
You bit your tongue, an odd feeling boiling in your stomach. April was the month you broke up with Sunghoon and left for university, it was more than just a coincidence for him and his band to have 'April' in their name. All you knew was the sinking feeling never went away.
"You alright?" Yunjin noticed your silence, casting a worried glance at you.
"April …" you mumbled, eyes staring straight ahead at Sunghoon who was setting up his bass on stage. "There must be something behind it,"
"What?"
"Nothing,"
You shook away that feeling currently eating up and put your focus on Sunghoon instead. It wasn't your first time watching him perform. It has always been him on ice in a big arena, but now it was him on a small stage at a dingy pub.
Sunghoon's eyes wandered all over the room, finally landing on you, a smile spreading on his pretty face. You managed a small smile, waving a little to let him know you're there, you're actually there and not a figment of his imagination, a dream that he has been wishing on for far too long.
The first song they played was an ABBA song. To be specific, it was your favourite ABBA song that you would listen to with Sunghoon in the past. Was it a coincidence?
You knew Heeseung had a vocal of stars, but to hear it for the first time in years was sending you into heaven. However, you failed to keep your focus on him, redirecting it to the bassist. You couldn't stop looking at Sunghoon, and his gaze wouldn't leave yours either. 
The second song soon came by, and at that point onwards, you knew it wasn't a coincidence. It only took two songs for you to realise that Sunghoon had prepared a set list of your favourite songs. The band was currently playing Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls, a song you had loved ever since forever.
You shouldn't be feeling light headed, but you were.
The set ended almost a few hours later. It was filled with your favourite songs, undoubtedly. The whole time, you were truly holding your breath, especially when Sunghoon was holding your gaze.
While people were filing in and out of the pub gradually, you stayed. It was well past midnight and Yunjin's cheeks were pink from the alcohol, wandering off to join Heeseung and the others. You, on the other hand, were sober as hell, waiting for Sunghoon with nerve wrecking anticipation.
"Hey, hey, hey. How did we do?" Sunghoon slid into a seat like an apparition appearing out of thin air. You jumped a little, but melted into a smile at the sight of him.
"You guys were great," it was genuine, because they did do amazing, probably more than just amazing. "'April nights', an interesting name,"
Realisation dawned on Sunghoon's face, he swallowed thickly. "I—yeah. April was an interesting month,"
"The set list …"
"Right, the set list," he chuckled, shifting on his feet a little nervously and stiffly. "I figured since you're here I'll play some of your favourite songs,"
"Oh," you let out softly, not knowing what else to say, this was something you found yourself acting around Sunghoon now. "That's … nice,"
Sunghoon gouged your expressions and the tone of your voice, a slow frown etching onto his tired face. "Did you not … like it? I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable,"
"No, it's not that! I'm just—" you paused, thinking of an appropriate word to describe how you felt. Frankly, you didn't know your exact feelings. "—surprised and … confused?"
"Confused?"
"Sunghoon, we're exes, and you pulling this isn't exactly helping—this—" you gestured to the space between you and him. "Us,"
Sunghoon was silent for a moment, occasionally opening his mouth to say something just to close it before he could. "I—maybe I read it all wrong, I thought—you know what, forget it,"
"Don't. Just tell me," you reached over for him, but didn't touch his hand. "What are we? We're not exactly best friends nor are we enemies. I don't want any tension between us and I don't want you to think you have zero chance at all," you breathed, searching for his eyes. "I would want us to work out again, if that's what you want too,"
Sunghoon's eyes glistened with a spark of hope, relief washing over his face. It was an answer to his question. "I want us to work out. I want us to have another chance," his hand reached out for yours the first time since you've seen each other, feeling the warmth of his touch that you were no stranger to. He carefully and gently intertwined his hand with yours.
"We'll always find our way back to each other."
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It was odd but comforting to know that nothing has changed when it came to you and Sunghoon.
Sunghoon brought you to your favourite places, ate your favourite dishes, did your favourite activities as an attempt to rekindle everything back. Safe to say it was working.
Just like the first dates you had together, you felt yourself having the same bubbly feeling internally, the same giggles you caught yourself having after a stupid joke he made. Despite all that, over the course of a few weeks, it had you wondering about your relationship with him.
"Will you date him again?" Yunjin could tell you were struggling, even if you didn't say it, it was still quite evident.
"What's with the sudden question?"
"Well, considering he has taken you out on so many dates and still hasn't asked you to be his girlfriend again, I could tell you're troubled,"
"Okay, mind reader," you grumbled and shifted in your seat, hating how right she was. "He said he wanted to give us a chance again, so I was expecting that—you know—we'd get back together soon,"
"Your 'soon' seems a bit urgent, but I don't blame you," Yunjin shrugged, gaze softening at your words. "I can tell how much love there still is between the two of you. It's natural to gravitate towards each other, but time, time is what you need to heal the scars, Y/N. It's been years, give yourself time."
You suppose giving yourself time truly was what you needed. But when you mentally said you needed space, you didn't mean wanting Sunghoon to ignore you. 
That's right. He was ignoring you.
How did you know? Apparently, the hard way.
Calls, messages were all brushed aside. You didn't even see him physically. At one point, you considered him dead, but seeing him at a party proved to you that he wasn't.
"What the fuck is your problem?"
Cornering him was a challenge, but being headstrong and slightly buzzed, nothing could possibly stop you.
"Y/N?"
"Wow, I'm surprised you remember my name," you seethed, almost stumbling forward and throwing a punch at him. "So, we're playing the game where you get back at me and ghost me after all that we've been through lately? Sweet! Could've given me a head's up though,"
"What? You're the one who's planning to abandon me just like before!"
"What are you even saying?" 
"Your email, Y/N. I saw your email. How you have a big job in London and you just can't wait to join, throwing me away like a summer's fling right before you leave,"
"You're not making any sense, I'm not accepting that role!" You were heaving at anger at this point, matching the fumes emitting from Sunghoon's ears. "You dickhead! I'm literally throwing my dreams away and you're here thinking I'm leaving you again? Is that what you thought of first? Oh, maybe you could've just asked me, but you didn't, just like the past,"
Bringing up the past had triggered something not only in you but him. He blinked, keeping silent but chewing anxiously on the inside of his cheek. 
"You never changed, huh?"
You heaved a deep breath, shaking your head a little, not to answer his question, but at him. 
"Well I guess that makes the both of us."
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"I fucked it up, didn't I?"
The night after the confrontation, you woke up on Yunjin's couch with a hangover thanks to your habit of drinking your problems away. Remembering Sunghoon's face and the feelings you felt literally had you shrivelling back into the couch, a deep frown etched on your face.
"Partly, yes, but mostly, no," you felt the couch dip beneath Yunjin's weight as she joined your side, a warm cup of coffee in her hand. "He fucked up first, but I think it's all just a big misunderstanding,"
"I don't we've healed from it," you took the cup from her and drank from it. "He's scared of me leaving and I was considering leaving again. Maybe we're just not meant to be,"
Yunjin sighed, moving her body closer to you and placing a comforting hand on yours. "If you're not leaving, that means you're staying, which also means you get to make it right. You get to have time to mend it all unlike the last time,"
"I have to make it right, don't I?"
A nod of confirmation from Yunjin was all you needed to know your next step. So, you decided to show up at his gig in the same exact pub without thinking through it twice.
"He's not here tonight," Heeseung looked thoroughly puzzled by your sudden appearance, and it seemed none of them knew about the small altercation you had with Sunghoon. 
"Really?"
"Yeah, he's been acting a bit … off. We asked him to take a night off, maybe you should give him a call."
If only it was that easy. 
Walking back home with a dejected heart was not the plan you had in mind. A part of you even thought this was truly the end, maybe he reached the conclusion of going no contact and you have no choice but to accept it. Was this karma?
It didn't help that you walked past the park that you and Sunghoon used to run off to back in the past.  The exact bench which you and him sat on still resided there. Your curious mind led your legs towards it, taking a seat and remembering all the memories you shared with him. 
Being alone under the night sky and getting accompanied by the dim light coming from the street lamp had given you a chance to rethink your choices about coming back home, whether it was worth it to see Sunghoon once again and try for the closure you never got. Well, look where it got you now.
The ruffles of the leaves got you snapping your head towards the direction of the noise, but it only landed on a figure.
"Y/N?"
You squinted, waiting until the figure walked under the streetlamp to distinguish that it was … Sunghoon. You should be feeling glad now that he was there in front you, but why were you feeling the exact opposite?
"Sunghoon? W–what are you doing here?" You stood up, watching him getting closer, the anguish in his face was clear.
"I–I … I went to look for you," he started, carefully and slowly inching closer until there's a comfortable distance between you both. "You weren't home and I thought … that was it,"
That was a fatal flaw you and him shared, wasn't it?
"I went to the pub to look for you too," your voice came out in a hushed whisper, breathing becoming ragged. "And you weren't there, so I thought … I thought it was the end too,"
"Fuck's sake, I know I said this many times but I'm sorry, Y/N," he sounded desperate, apologetic and almost exasperated. "I'm sorry for assuming things and ignoring you, I guess I never really got rid of the avoiding thing. I'm just … scared of you leaving me and I can't accept it again,"
"I'm not leaving, Hoonie," you were the first to reach out, to touch him and pull him into your embrace. "I didn't think you'd see that email so I never said anything about it. But I'm not leaving, okay? Not this time, never again. I'm here and I'm staying,"
You heard Sunghoon's quiet breathing next to your ear, his calming heartbeat thrumming against your shoulder. "I'm sorry, I really am, Y/N. I said I wanted to make this right but why does it feel like I'm fucking it all up?"
"You're not, Hoon, trust me. If I have to be honest here, both of us have past scars that aren't healed yet. It takes time, one step at a time, and that was what I learned. I think we're not fully healed from the past," you held onto him tighter, spilling all your hidden truths. "We can make it right, but first, we have to forgive ourselves, forgive each other and move on,"
Sunghoon pulled away a little, but his arms still remained around you. It was the first time you were ever so close to him since the split, wholly vulnerable and showing him your truest emotions. 
"I forgive you," he whispered, pearly tears threatening to spill from the edge of his eyes. "And I'm sorry again,"
"I forgive you too," your grip on his jacket tightened, a small comforting smile appearing on your lips, one that Sunghoon reciprocated. 
"I don't think I'll ever stop loving you," he confessed, a little out of the blue, but it was something he needed to get out of his system before he burst. "Those years when you were away, I see you in everyone else, I don't think anyone could ever compare. I still love you even after this long,"
Your mind was in a haze upon hearing his confession, sincerity and longing hidden in his words but evident in his eyed. For a moment, you thought of what you could say, but nothing came to mind, so you did the first thing your body told you to. You kissed him. Actually, it was more of a peck, a simple quick peck that was enough to shock both him and you.
"I'm sorry!" You saw his wide eyes and wondered if it was a good time to have even done that.
Sunghoon melted into an expression of adoration, a wide smile etched on his lips, as if in both disbelief and relief that you kissed him. "Don't be sorry," he stepped closer, only an inch measured the distance between you and him. The space became smaller when he leaned down, eyes flickering down to your lips. "Can I?"
Was this happening? "Yeah," 
Sunghoon didn't waste any moment in meeting your lips with his. It was natural, easy, for you to kiss him just like first instinct. The amount of desperation, sadness, anger and love were poured into the way he kissed you. There wasn't any urgency, but it spoke louder than intended.
It was short, but it was enough to let the both you know the true feelings you harboured for each other. By the time you pulled away from him, you felt his eyes on you, a giggle erupted from you unexpectedly, and he started joining in.
You really looked like a lovesick fool standing under the streetlamp with your lover. 
"Do you want to stop by that old spot we used to go to?" Sunghoon suggested, a little shyly this time.
"The one nearby?"
"That one,"
"Let's go then." you nodded, casting him a soft smile. 
Sunghoon didn't say much, but his hand did the talking by reaching for yours. He held onto it tightly, intertwining his fingers with yours and swinging your interlocked hands as you walked. He might've not said much, but you could tell how he felt.
Feelings might be complicated, and  making amends with the history behind a broken relationship was equally challenging, but what mattered most was getting back with the one who you called your soulmate, your lover, your best friend.
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