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scary-grace · 10 days ago

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The Yawning Grave - a Shigaraki x F!reader fic

Tomura and his friends might look like a team of paranormal investigators, but they're actually professional hoaxers -- every episode of their hit show has been faked. The episode they're filming in an abandoned town in a temperate rainforest is no different. At least at first. Rated T trending M in later chapters, found footage horror tropes, filmmaker!Tomura. Title/chapter headings based on The Yawning Grave by Lord Huron.

omens and signs

Tomura wakes up slowly, but he’d rather not be awake at all – and what he hears when the grogginess starts to fade doesn’t do much to change that impression. “I’m not pulling over again, Dabi. Take your Dramamine.”

“How am I supposed to take my Dramamine if I can’t stop hurling long enough for it to work?”

“Maybe we should pull over long enough for Dabi to take his Dramamine and then digest it,” Twice suggests. “No, that’s a bad idea. Let’s make him throw up until he’s empty and we don’t have to stop again.”

“How about we don’t do any of that,” Toga says. Her voice sounds sweet, but Tomura knows just as well as anybody what she sounds like when she’s about to cut a bitch, and it’s a little too close for comfort. “Dabi, keep your mouth closed. Spinner, don’t floor it around the curves. Jin, don’t laugh. Tomura, don’t –”

Tomura pretends he’s asleep. Toga reaches into the backseat and punches him in the arm, at which point he sits upright in a hurry. “What?”

“Tell Spinner to drive slower,” she says, smiling at him, “and tell Dabi to stop talking.”

“Stop talking,” Tomura says to Dabi. Dabi gives him both middle fingers, way, way up. “Spinner has to drive fast. We need to be there and setting up camp by nightfall.”

“Yeah. Otherwise our nighttime shaky-cam breakdowns won’t be anywhere near as scary.”

“Right.” Tomura doesn’t need to be awake for this. He can film a found-footage documentary hoax in his sleep.

Tomura used to be into debunking this stuff. Then he realized that he could make a hell of a lot more money faking it, and have a lot more fun in the bargain. Now, instead of trying to prove that reality really is as boring as it looks, Tomura and his friends have turned their professional skeptic side-hustle into a full-time business faking the stuff they used to debunk. And because Tomura’s still a skeptic at heart, he knows how to skeptic-proof his hoaxes.

First step: Pick a spot that’s no more than locally famous. Find some local legends – there are always at least a few. Case the joint, figure out what type of haunting or infestation would be the most believable, and then make it look and sound as real as possible. Sometimes that means wholesale making shit up, which is fine. Tomura and his crew have gotten called out plenty of times, but they’ve never been caught before.

“I don’t know, guys,” Twice says as Spinner takes another curve at slightly less than warp speed. “I feel weird about this one. That guy at the gas station acted like we were nuts.”

“Gas station guys always act like that.”

“Not exactly like that.” Dabi sounds like he’s speaking through clenched teeth. “He said it was a paper town. Named after that book. But I looked it up before Spinner started auditioning for fucking Formula One, and it’s been on the map since before the book was published.”

The book – ’Salem’s Lot, by Stephen King. Tomura read it, liked it, and then, when he was scanning maps looking for a place to plan the next hoax, he spotted it. A rain-drenched dot on the map, in America’s Pacific Northwest, labeled Jerusalem’s Lot. Same as the town in the book that gets overrun by vampires. “So he named the book after this place,” Tomura says, and Dabi twists around to glare at him. “Come on. Don’t tell me you’re getting spooked.”

“Twice is right. There was something weird about that guy,” Dabi says. “We spooked him, not the other way around. There’s something going on here that –”

Spinner zips around another bend in the road, and Dabi scrambles to roll the window down. “He does have a point,” Toga says, like there’s not rain and wind whipping through the car and Dabi gagging like a cat with a hairball. “There aren’t legends about this place or anything. We’ve gotten the dumb-college-kid treatment a million times –”

“Which is dumb,” Spinner puts in. “We’re not in college.”

Toga ignores him, too. “But that guy looked surprised at first. Then he looked nervous. And he said something weird.”

“Play it back,” Tomura instructs. Toga digs out the camera.

Gas station guy looks like every other gas station guy they’ve encountered, but as Toga plays it back, Tomura watches the same emotions she named cross his face. Surprise, then nerves. “Salem’s Lot is a paper town.” There’s a pause. “Ain’t nothing living up there that’s human.”

“Nice work getting that line out of him,” Tomura tells Toga, who was doing the interview. “It’ll be great for the promos.”

“Nothing living up there that’s human. He could just mean animals,” Twice pipes up. “The more rural it is, the weirder everybody talks. Remember those old guys with the accents?”

Even the films Tomura’s made in rural Japan has featured old guys with accents. They’re practically a genre staple. “It’s true. People use different syntax in rural areas than in the city,” Spinner says. “Still, though. It’s –”

Dabi pulls his head back in through the window and rolls it up. “It’s easy to hear that line as meaning that there’s something inhuman in ’Salem’s Lot.”

“Which is why it’s perfect,” Tomura says. “Don’t crack up on me. Any of you. If something had happened here, there’d be legends about it. Local myths. Something other than an old guy at a gas station talking about paper towns.”

“There’s one reason why there wouldn’t be legends,” Spinner says from the front seat. “If nobody made it out alive.”

Tomura doesn’t expect that kind of shit out of his crew, and for a split second, he wonders if there’s anything to what they’re saying. Then he spots the blinking red light of one of their pocket cameras, and a mic settled down in the hood of Toga’s jacket, and swears. “You all think you’re fucking hilarious, don’t you?”

“You should have seen your face,” Twice wheezes. “We got you so good –”

“How much of it did you just make up?” Tomura snaps. “Did you bribe that old guy while I was taking a leak?”

“No, he just said it,” Toga says. “All the stuff we said is true. And if it spooked you for a second, Tomura-kun, it’s definitely going to spook the audience.”

She’s right. Still, Tomura doesn’t like ending up on the wrong end of a hoax, and he’s pretty sure he knows whose idea this was. “Did you fake being carsick, too?”

“Did I fool you?” Dabi asks – and then Spinner whips around a corner too fast, and Dabi lunges for the window again. The carsickness is for real. Tomura wonders if he can convince Spinner to drive even faster.

They make it to Jerusalem’s Lot just past four o’clock, which leaves them enough daylight to poke around, record some B-roll, and get a few exterior shots in. The guy at the gas station was bullshitting them – there’s clearly a town up here. Houses, a main street, buildings, streetlights, all of it well on its way to being swallowed up by the rainforest. “How fast do you think stuff like this grows in?”

“These are all native plants,” Spinner says from where he’s crouched down, examining a nest of ferns. “This is their optimal environment. So if nobody was cutting them back, this could happen in – a few years, maybe. Most of these buildings are wood. If we came back fifteen years from now, there’d probably be nothing left.

Which means it can’t have been abandoned for very long – well within living memory. Tomura rolls his shoulders, limbering up. “Let’s find an establishing shot and get this done.”

Tomura calls the big shots, but everybody else fills in with smaller ones they think they might need in the editing process. Tomura puts up with two or three extra shots from everybody before they refocus. He should have written a script. What’s going to come out of his mouth is probably going to be pretty stupid.

“I’m Shigaraki Tomura. We’re the League of Villains. Today we’re investigating Jerusalem’s Lot, an American small town – which, according to the locals, doesn’t exist.”

They asked one local. They’ll go back with the camera on the way out and bother some people until they pick up enough footage to make it look like they’re trying to hide something instead of just trying to get away. This is where they’ll splice in Gas Station Guy with his creepy comment. “As you can see behind me, Jerusalem’s Lot is very real – or it was. Join us as we try to figure out what happened here, and if there’s anything alive in Jerusalem’s Lot after all.”

“Nice, boss,” Twice remarks. It’s a good thing it’s cold out. Tomura gets sweaty when he’s on camera, and he needs to air his armpits out. “The mic might have gotten fuzzy because of the wind, but we can dub over it in post, easy.”

“I like the lighting out here,” Toga says. “There are some holes in the canopy where sun will get through. If it’s ever sunny.”

“It’s supposed to be sunny tomorrow,” Spinner says, shivering. “It better be. I’ll freeze to death.”

Dabi rolls his eyes. “Sure you will.”

“I will. And then you guys will probably use my body to jazz up a shot, because you all suck –”

Tomura tunes them out and goes picking his way up what was probably the main street of ’Salem’s Lot. He’s visited a lot of small towns, even more ghost towns, but there’s something different about this place. Maybe it’s all the greenery. Ghost towns in other places fall to dust. It’s not usual to see one that’s actively being eaten alive – or dead – by the woods. People lived here. People either got up and left or they died here. The former, almost always. Tomura identifies a couple houses that look semi-structurally sound as potential filming spots for tomorrow, then makes his way back to the others.

Coming to Jerusalem’s Lot was the right choice, and as they set up camp and build a fire, the League’s mood is good. Unusually good, given the conditions they’re camping out in. “I think this one is going to be awesome,” Toga says, the firelight glinting off her teeth. “This place would be spooky even without the buildings. All the moss and lichen – and the fog –”

“We could do a haunting for this place,” Spinner suggests. “Ghosts and stuff. We haven’t done that in a while.”

“Yeah, the last time was that mansion in New Hampshire,” Twice says. Then he frowns. “We didn’t have to fake that one.”

No, they didn’t. They all saw things in that house, enough for them to scrap the episode and not come back. Tomura has a strict hoaxes-only rule these days. “Ghosts are easy to do in post-production, but for a town this size, we’d need to fake multiple ghosts,” Dabi says. “And if we have that many ghosts, we have to explain where they came from.”

“Maybe an epidemic?” Toga suggests. “We haven’t done disease in a while, either.”

“That would be tough to pull off, unless we invented something,” Tomura says. “They don’t have the Ebola virus up here.”

Nobody likes it when Tomura mentions the Ebola virus. He sees their expressions and decides to pay them back a bit for their bullshit earlier. “There’s always plague, though. Pneumonic and septicemic plague could both kill fast enough that they wouldn’t have had time to get help.”

“Then we should keep an eye out for skeletons tomorrow,” Spinner says. “And somebody’s gonna need to hold Twice’s hand so he doesn’t freak out and drop the camera. Again.”

“That was one time!”

“We can’t fake skeletons,” Dabi says. “We can fake creatures.”

Tomura rolls his eyes. “You know how hard it is to fake creatures. What would we even fake around here?”

“Vampires,” Twice offers. “Like that book.”

“That would be really hard to fake,” Toga remarks. “Isn’t there some kind of cryptid that’s native to this place? Something tall and furry?”

“Yeah, it’s like a –” Tomura thinks back on his notes. “Sasquatch. Or a Bigfoot.”

“We can’t use that,” Spinner says at once. “It sounds too goofy.”

“Yeah, the airport kiosks were selling it on t-shirts,” Twice agrees. “No vampires. No big furry guys. So that leaves – uh –”

“We could try crawlers,” Toga suggests, and Dabi starts to argue. “I know we’ve used them before, but – why can’t there be different subspecies? Crawlers in a temperate rainforest wouldn’t look anything like crawlers in the Andes mountains.”

It’s quiet for a second. “If you guys are going to make me wear the crawler suit again, I want overtime,” Spinner mutters, and Dabi grins across the campfire. “So what are we doing tomorrow, then – film documentary stuff in the morning, crawler stuff in the afternoon?”

“Works for me.” Tomura yawns. “I’m tired. Don’t forget to put the fire out.”

Inside his tent, Tomura sets up his personal camera to record. He’s not sure if everyone else does, too, but they’re supposed to – to pick up any weird things that happen during the night, any inexplicable sounds or shadows, whether they wake up to it or not. Usually it just catches him tossing and turning, and he deletes the footage in postproduction. Tomura unzips his sleeping bag, shuts off his camping lantern, and closes his eyes. This shoot is going to go well. There’s enough here for a solid hoax. Aside from Spinner in a crawler suit, they’re not going to have to make anything up.

Tomura sleeps solidly, straight through the night. He wakes up without an alarm, better rested than usual, and fumbles for his phone, which he’s pretty sure he left on the pillow next to him. The phone’s not there, but something else is, something small and cold and metal. When Tomura blinks sleep out of his eyes, lifts it to inspect it, he finds that it’s a heart-shaped locket, clinging to life on a frail chain.

Tomura’s friends are going to be on their bullshit for this entire shoot, it looks like. Still, the locket’s a nice touch, and if they fuck with the shot of Toga planting it on Tomura’s pillow, they can make it look like it appeared out of nowhere. Even if they’ve decided on crawlers, it won’t hurt to wave a red herring about ghosts.

But when he shows it to Toga, he gets a blank look and nothing else. “I didn’t put that there. I’ve never seen it before.”

Tomura’s about to tell her to cut the bullshit when he realizes that Dabi’s camera is on. No way is Toga dropping the story while she’s being filmed, and Tomura might as well play along. “Take a look at it. Maybe it’ll give us a clue about what happened here.”

“Hmm.” Toga lifts the locket out of Tomura’s hand and starts inspecting it between sips of coffee. “14-karat gold – not bad, but not over-the-top expensive. It’s on a box chain, which is interesting. They’re not as common as other varieties of chain, but they’re sturdy. See how tightly they’re interlocked? Something like this wouldn’t break easily. And the clasp’s still intact. The person who owned this took it off on purpose.”

She glances up at Tomura, eyes exaggeratedly wide. “What’s inside it?”

By this point, they’ve drawn Spinner and Twice over. They and Tomura hover over Toga’s shoulders as she pries the locket open. “There are photos,” she starts, and then her shoulders slump, her voice going small. “This was a kid’s. A little girl’s.”

Toga’s the best actor on the team. The rest of them need to take lessons. “How do you know?”

“On this side –” Toga holds it up, and Spinner digs up his phone to zoom in. “There’s a picture of two people. Based on their age, I’m guessing they’re her parents. And on the other side – that’s her dog.”

“Right. An adult would have photos of their spouse,” Dabi says from across the fire. “Or their kids. Parents and dog says kid. How do you know it’s a girl?”

“How many boys do you know who’d wear a heart-shaped locket?”

Dabi starts ribbing Toga for being sexist, and she argues back that he wouldn’t wear a locket if she paid him, and under cover of an argument that’s only half-staged, Tomura inspects the locket a little closer. It’s definitely a dog on one side of the locket, some goofy mutt-thing with bright eyes and floppy ears, and looking at it pulls Tomura’s vocal cords tight. He’d maybe have worn a locket as a kid, if his sister or somebody else had given him one. And he’d definitely have put a photo of his dog in it.

But Tomura’s got a couple screws loose. His family made that crystal clear. He snaps the locket shut, then cuts off Toga and Dabi’s stupid argument. “Hey. How old do you think this is?”

“Um –” Toga studies it. “Not an antique. More than ten years, less than thirty.”

“That’s within the time frame,” Spinner says. “How did it end up on your pillow?”

Tomura’s getting tired of this bit. He waits a second or three, then calls cut. “We have a lot to do today. Let’s get going.”

They have an evidence bin for stuff that shows up on shoots, but since the locket’s a joke his friends are playing, Tomura doesn’t feel bad about pocketing it. They left it for him, anyway. Tomura wonders what’s gotten into his friends. They’re a lot more into this shoot than they’ve been on other ones, but maybe that’s a good thing. If there’s one thing Tomura’s work has taught him, it’s that every good hoax needs a small piece of truth at the center of it. The expression Dabi’s camera probably caught on his face when he opened the locket is a good start.

taglist: @shigarakislaughter @lvtuss @deadhands69 @xeveryxstarfallx @cheeseonatower @agente707 @warxhammer @handumb @atspiss @f3r4lfr0gg3r @shikiblessed @evilcookie5 @dance-with-me-in-hell @babybehh @boogiemansbitch @baking-ghoul @minniessskii @issaortiz @aslutforfictionalmen @lacrimae-lotos @stardustdreamersisi @koohiii

#shigaraki x reader #shigaraki x you #tomura shigaraki x reader #tomura shigaraki x you #shigaraki tomura x reader #shigaraki tomura x you #x reader #reader insert #man door hand hook car door #found footage au #a bisquared production

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billyvell · 3 months ago

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On Lochlan, his sexuality and incest

Ok, so the following text was written with reddit in mind, so my tone is a bit more... idk, serious and cautious than it usually is, but I decided to post it here as well, cause this whole topic has been eating me up. I'm also aware that I'm kinda preaching to the choir when it comes to how tumblr sees this situation, but still.

Ok, so I was thinking of waiting for the end of the season to talk about this, but to be honest it's been kind of driving me mad.

For a while now, there has been debate about what exactly is going on with Lochy and his relationship with his brother and what exactly is the truth behind this whole situation. After all the debate about him supposedly being an evil predator who spit the pill (which he didn't!) so he could take advantage of Saxon, it seems that now most people have settled on "he was just genuinely trying to help and the handy was bad but not actually incestuous in nature", and I kind of understand why because this is pretty much how the actor is explaning his character away, but I'm gonna be honest, I don't think that's really the case.

I don't want to discredit Sam entirely, cause I do believe that actors' opinions matter as it affects how they play things, but he's still not the writer/director/anything with actual input in the story, and both he and Patrick have also said that Mike White decided to leave things up for interpretation, and he hasn't given any interviews or explained his thoughts himself (well, apparently he mentioned something about a "gay storyline that is truly satanic", as that's mentioned in a couple articles, and if that is true, the fact that he's even referring to it as a gay storyline kinda supports my point).

I actually agree with most of what Sam has said, which is that Lochy is a people pleaser who is desperate for approval and attention. As of these last few episodes, he has basically followed his brother's lead and done everything that Saxon has told him to. I do believe he did not have any malicious intentions.

However, this doesn't necessarily negate the idea of him being sexually attracted to him. I think the way Sam talks about it, as well as a large part of the audience, comes from the idea that it has to be either one of two extremes: Either Lochy is a creep and a freak and predatory, or he's actually just a teenager helping out his brother in a no homo way... Which honestly just doesn't compute.

If you pay attention, there has been a lot of stuff suggesting Lochy is queer. Whether he's gay or bi I don't know, and I don't think it really matters, but I just can't possibly think he's straight. I'm gonna list all the ways that I think indicate that, and I will warn that some will probably be considered a reach by some, but others imo are very clear, and I ask you to read this with an open mind.

1 - From the beginning, he has the dilemma of going to Duke or Tar Heel for college. As in, will he follow the same path as the men of his family or the women. He doesn't know himself. This could mean different things, like does going to Duke makes him more masculine like his father and brother, or does it mean that he's choosing their side as in... choosing men? And vice-versa. Not like it's an actual choice, but again, as a storytelling device.

2 - Both his parents (but particularly the dad, I think) are adamant on him fixing his posture. Straightening his spine. Making him stand up straight. Saxon also encourages this, on the same situations where he encourages him to hook up with women or drink his protein shakes to get buff.

3 - If you think the last point is a reach, in the very session that he takes for said issue, the therapist tells him that he sits in a defensive posture because he's "protecting himself with his female side."

4 - He's the one who notices the "ladyboys" and asks "Dad, are they women?". When Saxon makes his joke about them, "you never know which one is gonna have nuts", he looks visibly uncomfortable. He tries to laugh at it like he does with most of his jokes, but for that one he can't. You can see that he's affected.

On his mother's dream, she also sees him sitting with two "ladyboys" as he talks about the tsunami.

5 - When Saxon is getting drinks for them on the Full Moon Party, he says "pink one for the lady" and tries to hand it to Chelsea. When she refuses and goes to take her call, Lochy takes it instead.

Now, to kinda go back on the Saxon/incest-related.

If you're a straight guy, losing your virginity to a woman, would you really be so focused on jerking off another man? Even if it's like, some guy you really like such as your best friend or your brother? I don't know. And he didn't seem to be actually that interested in Chloe to me. Not grossed out either, so I don't think he has to be gay necessarily rather than bi/pan/whatever, but still.

Chloe also mentioned how young virgin guys get all flustered and shaking with their hearts beating rapidly when they take off their clothes and etc, that she wanted that kind of attention. Yet we don't see any kind of excitement from Lochy over her, really. If you look at Saxon's memories, Lochy only smiles when he's looking at Saxon and Saxon looks like he's about to come (as he jerks his body up).

Going back to the first episode... Many people have rationalized that scene as not really being sexual. I know what Sam has said about it on interviews, too. But I just don't think it checks out. There is a real focus on Saxon being naked and Lochy staring at him. That soundtrack, which seems to be one that plays when something kind of spicy and perhaps unsettling is happening, starts playing right as we get the shot of Saxon walking naked with his ass on full display. It continues as Lochy is looking at him.

And then Saxon notices, and even him, who has no boundaries and was talking about porn and sex, seems a little freaked out when he does. As Saxon closes the door, Lochy looks like he's either embarrassed for being caught looking, disappointed that he closed the door, or both.

And then on episode 2 we have the scene of him waking up. And again the first thing he sees is Saxon's ass, and then he goes wash his face and looks in the mirror. Yeah, this isn't quite proof of anything, but what is the purpose of the scene then, why was it written and shot and kept in the final edit? Especially when you consider it in addition to the previous one.

And lastly, spoiler alert, in one of the trailers/promos,there are scenes where he says to Piper "I don't want to give in to my dark shit" and "if everyone gave in to their base instincts, it'd be total depravity."

If he does not have any incestuous feelings for Saxon, what is this "dark shit" he has in him that he's talking about? For the second one there could be some other context, but even then it seems like he's thinking of his own "base instincts" as depraved.

To go back to what Sam has been saying on interviews a bit, I think a lot of it comes from the fact that he wants to defend Lochy and believe that he's a good person, especially after the reactions to episode 5 where so many people were saying that Lochy was a creep, a predator, some kind of evil mastermind/manipulator and theorizing that he had spit out his pill and was perfectly sane.

I think he feels the need to defend him and not paint him in such a negative light, and because incest is a thing that is considered, well, bad by most people, he's denying that as well. In another interview he also said actors need to find a way to love and connect with the character no matter what, and I think this is a big part of it, not seeing him as fully incestuous if one thinks that incest is something irredeemable.

Both he and many people watching also seem to think that Lochy thinking of the handjob or even the kiss as him wanting to make Saxon happy and impressed automaticaly negates him being attracted to him and having any other feelings about it, but that isn't necessarily the case. It can be both, it makes sense that it's both imo, and I think that's part of what makes him and this storyline as a whole so interesting, that there are so many layers to it.

But in my mind, with all of the context we have for the character in relation to both his relationship with Saxon and in regards to how his own identity and individual arc is portrayed, I think Lochy is definetely queer, and indeed attracted to his brother. And when you put these two things together, it can easily be explained as something similar to, if not straight up the same thing, as the Oedipus/Electra complex.

Lochy, even though he's legally an adult at 18, is clearly still developing in many ways, including his sexuality, and Saxon is the closest male figure in his life, not to mention one who's showing up naked in front of him and talking about sex.

If you're grossed out by it and want it to be explained away, or get some comfort about it in general, I think it would make sense for him to sort of grow out of that as he gets older and more secure in himself/his sexuality, especially after the confusion and guilt he feels over what he did as seen in the monastery scene when he remembers things.

#saxloch #lochlan ratliff #the white lotus #the white lotus season 3 #the white lotus s3 #the white lotus spoilers #twl spoilers

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lunar-wandering · 10 months ago

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anyways as i mentioned earlier here is my absolutely nuts 'analysis' of Boboiboy having autism, and how each of the seven elementals kinda showcase a heightened version of an autism symptom-

so we're gonna go down in order (of manifestation for the elements)-

Boboiboy himself- he's just got the vibe, y'know? But also; it's been established he had no friends prior to moving in with his grandfather, which, y'know, is quite strange for a "normal" kid his age. He also tends to look at the people around him to know how to react in certain social situations (usually the person he looks to is Gopal which. Isn't always the best choice). Also the strong sense of justice is obvious (including that he goes so far as to help villains as well). (Yes this can be an autism symptom).

Halilintar (Thunderstorm). hear me out. Halilintar manifested due to overstimulation. I mean obviously the phobia of balloons is a huge factor here- but being in distress due to loud sounds is exactly one of the things that causes overstimulation for autistic people (could contribute to why he has this fear in the first place). One of the ways people might react to overstimulation is by becoming irrationally angry. Basically what I'm saying is that Halilintar spends most of his time on the edge of a meltdown-

Taufan (Cyclone). autistic joy. listen LISTEN. it's DIFFERENT from other people's joy, okay? a lot of autistic people experience emotions very intensely, it can full out take over you. also as far as i remember (it's been a while) he was the only one who had such an intense reaction to the mood changing potion- sure, the other people who had it were locked in one emotion, but none of them went as wild as he did- because he felt it a lot more intensely.

Gempa (Earthquake). i will admit, i struggled for a moment with Gempa- but honestly i think it's because he is, in my opinion, the one who's the most similar to OG Boboiboy. other than the heightened need to protect, which likely includes the sense of justice, I think Gempa is the one who masks the most out of all the elements. This is also why he seems to be the most neutral element.

Blaze and Ice. I'm doing these two together, because technically, their origin points are from the same thing: Burnout. It's just two very different responses to it. On the one side, Blaze is trying to, ironically enough considering the name, prevent burnout, by relieving stress (by doing things in the middle of night while no-one is looking and there's no pressure of social interaction). When there is too much stress, he falls into an overstimulated state similar to Halilintar's. On the other side, Ice represents the more depressed side of burnout- aka what happens after you actually burn out. It's why he's tired all the time.

Duri (Thorn). Okay so technically Thorn first manifested in battle but we're ignoring that. His tier 1 manifestation, as we all know, was mainly most definitely because Boboiboy got a concussion- but! Here's the thing; I don't think the concussion is why Thorn acts the way he does (though it's probably a part of it). I think, Thorn is just unmasked. The others all mask on some level, but Thorn just, doesn't. He doesn't really care how others might perceive him if he does 'childish' things or says things that no-one else understands because they didn't make the same connections he did, and he certainly doesn't care that deadpan telling someone their outfit is terrible might hurt their feelings, it doesn't even occur to him. He doesn't mask at all.

Solar. Again, technically manifested during battle. However once again we are ignoring that. It was established that the manifest condition for Solar (as Light), was for the elemental master (Boboiboy) to "expand their knowledge", and "read more". And, well, I know Boboiboy specifically read a bunch of science and history books and stuff, but honestly I don't think it really would've mattered what he chose to use to expand his knowledge, because Solar's main autistic trait is special interest. Because Boboiboy mainly focused on science and stuff, that became Solar's special interest, hence why he rambles off about formulas and stuff, and why he likes doing experiments. He hyperfixates on that stuff.

now. i could do the fusions... but honestly i haven't thought about the fusions enough to draw conclusions, so we're sticking with this

#Boboiboy

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scribephoenixwriting · 2 months ago

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Bob Reynolds Character analysis: Ever The Void, once more The Sentry.

After Thunderbolts* I read every major Sentry comic to get a better feel for the character and to see what aspects were adapted well. He's cool. He's terrifying, tragic, and beautiful. But also, he's never written consistently, which means he's always changing.

I'm going to run through all his major appearances here and piece together a picture of his psyche, back to front. This will include some very polarized characterization that I intend to make sense of, so a bit of it is headcanon, but MOST of it is textual.

We are introduced to Bob Reynolds in Sentry Volume 1 from 2000. There was some marketing stuff regarding him being a Stan Lee character but I'm not going to get into that right now.

As a young man, Bob Reynolds discovers the professors formula and becomes the Sentry! With the power of a million exploding suns, he'll stop evil when he sees it and protect the innocent. Bob is introduced as an ideal hero who has been forgotten by the modern age. He knew the x-men, spider-man, and could pacify the hulk. Sentry #1-6, his crossovers, and Sentry Vs The Void make up this original arc, its a mystery. Robert must find out why the world forgot one of their greatest heroes before the void returns and destroys them all.

This mini-series establishes a lot of key concepts. Rob is an addict struggling with his mental health. The void is a part of him. He knows everybody. He is the best of them. I think the most important thing here is the fact that he was forgotten. Sentry and Void's dynamics are explored further much later.

Sentry, a hero that always swoops in at the nick of time, someone that we can all rely on, is showing cracks. He's slipping, his sanity is questioned all throughout. The serum is synonymous with drug abuse, the sentry is the high, and the void are the lows. There is intervention imagery present, where the avengers tell him to stop being the sentry, and in some ways, Bob feels betrayed by this.

Bob has been positioned as a kind of linchpin for other heroes, someone they can always rely on. When the truth comes out; The void IS the sentry, they don't comfort or help him. The void is simply too dangerous, so they must simply forget him.

I think this is the tragedy that gets less attention. Yes, its sad that you must be forgotten by everyone, even yourself, but to me, the sadder thing is why.

It is far easier for the world to forget about Bob than it is for the world to fight his darkness. The void's rampage could kill millions, so its not like you can exactly fault Reed for it, but ultimately, being forgotten is synonymous with deeming Bob a lost cause, no matter the good he's done. In order for the memory loss to work, the avengers must brand him as a traitor to the public, so they want to forget him. Even if the truth is different, even if people remember him, they'll only see him as a junkie who betrayed the side of good.

The Sentry has done unquantifiable good for the world, he always saved the heroes in the nick of time, but when it comes time for someone to save Bob, to help him with his issues, they abandon him once more. Its worth noting that Bob, Sentry, and Void are all the same person, so the feelings of one can be seen in some ways as the subconscious feelings of the other. Even though it was necessary, on some levels, Bob did see this as a kind of betrayal.

In order to stop the Void, he agrees to go away again, to be forgotten by the public once more and go back to his life as Bob the nut. He woke up in the middle of the night, certain that The void would return, he gathered his friends together, and they couldn't fight it with him.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to come back,"

A man struggling with his mental health has reached out to his friends after a long time of substance abuse. He asks them to help him fight the darkness within, but they can't. They just can't. So he has to go away. Bob has burdened them. His burdens are far too great for them to bear. He's sorry for coming back into their lives as if it was his fault.

It isn't your fault, Bob.

New Avengers 2004! A group of super-heroes are caught amidst a super-villain prison break. In this prison, tucked away in a solitary cell, is none other than the Sentry himself. (Notice that he's still in costume?)

They fight off all they can, but when attacked by Carnage, they start losing. Suddenly, Sentry leaves his cell and defends our heroes.

In a moment of weakness, Bob pulls the "Tear him in half" gambit to great success. To Bob, this might as well be a relapse, so immediately after, he runs away.

Since his wife's death, he's sworn to never become the Sentry again. He's happy to punish himself forever if it means keeping people safe. However, the avengers find him and finally they HELP HIM!!!!!. Emma Frost helps him past his mental block and helps him regain control of his own psyche. No more forgetting, not anymore.

Bob still has issues, but previously he'd been stuck in a loop of returning, then forcing the world to forget him with his own psychic powers. Breaking this loop is like Bob finally reaching out for real. He's trying to stay in other peoples lives again. As such, the real return of the sentry isn't an enigmatic figure flying into space and tearing someone to pieces. Its heroic and beautiful.

At this point, Iron man is in Bobs corner quite consistently. He lets Bob set up on top of avengers tower, he supports him, he advocates for him. This makes sense given Tony's history as an alcoholic.

Finally, things are looking up for Bob. The avengers are helping him, and Lindy is alive!

Poor Lindy. Turns out she's not dead. She won't be. Not ever. For now, its a mystery why she's alive, presumed to have died either during the original mini series or sometime after. Eventually we'll find out.

Lindy and Tony act as (as far as I can tell) Bob and Sentry's main friends. Lindy is Bob's wife, she keeps him human. Iron man is Sentry's colleague, he keeps him good. I wonder what would happen if either of these two were removed from the picture. Hmm. Anyway.

After New Avengers 1-10 (2004), Bob gets his own Mini: Sentry Vol. 2 (2005).

Sentry Vol. 2 is all about Sentry and the Void. Bob is working around the clock, second to second, to save as many lives as he physically can at all times. He has little time for Lindy. He has only minutes a day for therapy, and he has the Void locked in his basement.

Except... he doesn't. The Sentry isn't in control. In fact, we learn towards the end of this Mini that these personas Bob has are essentially reactions to himself. When he drank the Golden Serum to get high, he became the void first. This is his self-hatred, his disappointment, and his anger at the world given the power of a million exploding suns.

The Void is the "Real" Bob, and the Sentry is his guilt, an unstoppable force that will make up for the Void's evil and fight him back at every turn. Bob goes into his basement every night to berate himself (The Void) in the mirror to make himself feel better. The most powerful superhero on the planet is a coping mechanism for Bob's self-disgust.

And this tracks. C.L.O.C., his personal assistant computer... thing... is programmed to always tell him who he needs to save next. Every second of every day is spent flying to disasters and swooping in, just like he used to. This is heroic, sure, but its also a punishment. No life. No wife. No fun. Go to the other side of the planet or people die. No breaks.

Sentry must spend every second of his existence making up for Bob's failure as a human being. Bob wants to be a better man, but he doesn't believe he's a good person, and he especially doesn't believe he's worthy of the power he has. When Bob realizes that Sentry is essentially just a reaction to his own guilt, he tries to kill the void.

And yeah. Big gay kiss. The Void is all of Bob's ugliness personified, and Bob knows that the Sentry is a high he's constantly chasing. He loves that power, but he knows how pathetic that is, so the Void adores the Sentry.

And here, the Void is making a good point. Bob can't stand himself. His addictions, his flaws, his schizophrenia, his agoraphobia. He hates them, despite being part of him, so he tries to kill them over and over and over again to no avail. His guilt prevents him from ever forgiving himself. The Sentry will always fight the Void and Bob will never have the chance to heal.

I'll continue this analysis in another post. I've got a lot more, but there's a limit on images I can attach.

Next up: Civil War, The Mighty Avengers, and World War Hulk.

#sentry #bob reynolds #robert reynolds #the void #the sentry #marvel #marvel comics #the avengers #thunderbolts #the new avengers #new avengers #The void is gay thoughts lowkey

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guard-dog-boyfriend · 4 months ago

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How to turn your darling into a religion

(long post below)

Disclaimer!!! I am a pagan and this path is loosey goosey enough as is. I will be using the framework of spirituality I have found myself most comfortable with but any examples I use can be tailored to your own personal view of religion, and whatever religion means to you. This is a very individualized thing to incorporate into your life so the way I practice may not look like how you do.

Also if anyone finds this and tries to come in my inbox to lecture me on "ohhh! You can't just create your own religion!! gO Touch Grass!!!" I am a literal pagan priest, I know how this shit works, and also

You can do whatever you want forever.

With that out of the way~

What makes up a religion?

A religion is a practice usually described as an answer for the afterlife, a moral code, or a way to travel through the world as we know it. I define religion fundamentally as a belief. If just you believe it, that belief has power. And what could be stronger than a yandere's belief in a darling?

This list is not comprehensive and tries to cover a lot quickly. But I hope it's good enough to be helpful for anyone trying to gain ideas.

Correspondences:

Every god and goddess have things that they are often equated to. For Thor it was lightning, for Poseidon the sea, etc. To lay the frame work of your religion, you need to decide what your darling is the god of. Think hard about what would fit their personality, their interests, or what they mean to you. I personally chose to make My Goddess the Goddess of Knowledge (and Lust but we're not gonna get into THAT) due to Her intense knowledge over a wide variety of hobbies and interests that matter to Her.

There's also more types of correspondences found in different materials. You can do crystals, herbs, etc, but here's a list of correspondences you can make for your chosen being.

Herbs

Crystals

Drinks

Foods

Seasons

Animals

Flowers

Household objects

Metals

Colors

Trees

Books/Shows/Music/Any Media

Holidays:

Congrats you have the framework of a god! Now fill in a little more of the gaps, what holidays are important to this god? What makes you want to celebrate their existence? Holidays usually have stories behind them so pick days that are important and have stories behind them, and make a whole day out of it (or something small whatever you prefer). Examples of days you can pick.

Valentine's Day

Anniversary

First Kiss

First Meeting

Birthday

Graduations

Any day they have achieved something significant (like winning a sports game, or passing a big follower count)

Okay you have a day. What does that day entail? If you're with this darling and can celebrate together, do that of course, but what can you actually do? Well holidays usually have feasts or specific foods attached to them! You can really go nuts with this. Make all the food heart shaped. Make their favorite food. Only eat things that you correspond them with. Or just make a big meal and eat that! Or go the opposite route, a lot of religions have healthy examples of fasting that you can follow. But obviously that's not all there is. You can do specific spells and rituals if you're witchy, such as binding spells, or handfasting rituals depending on the holiday. However you can also do "spells" and "rituals" in a more fun way, like making a holiday out of going to the dollar store and picking out a treat for them or going to an amusement park together. Here's another list because this is just the easiest format to put this in! Stuff to do as fun holiday events:

Go to an aquarium/museum/botanical garden, and document anything that reminds you of them

Do a love spell

Bind them to you using a binding spell

Hex a previous lover :)

Spoil them rotten on a date

Go to the dollar store and pick out 3 to 5 things for each other. Try and theme the things you pick!

Do tarot spread readings for the year (Tip: You can read tarot with a deck of playing cards)

Take a bath and meditate on their image

Build a lego set of something they'd like

Make them an offering (or just give them a gift lol)

Clean for them

Daily Devotions:

Religions also usually have a daily devotion component to remind you of your spirituality and faith so make a daily process of some kind and involve your god in it! I have weekly shrine maintenance, but I also have daily prayers I say. This can be something simple and quick. Like "May My Goddess's day be easy and may her good fortune shine on me as well"

You can also do things in the every day like having a necklace with special symbolism that you wear, or having a special ornament on the door to ward off danger. Here's another list! Last one I swear, this one is just of things you can do daily for your god.

Daily tarot readings on how their day is gonna go

Veiling or covering the top of your head

Dressing in a certain way for them (this could be modesty or... not modesty)

Make a quick doodle for them once a day

Keep a notebook for honoring them that you keep on your person for anything that comes up throughout the day

Make taking your medication an offering for them

Keeping a poppet or taglock of them on your person.

*heavy sigh* okay I'm done. Tl;dr have fun!!! If you can talk to your god about what they'd prefer worship of themselves to look like. If not, just do whatever comes natural. You really can't go wrong with this. If anyone has any further questions let me know! Also if there's typos please ignore them.

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seeingteacupsindragons · 1 month ago

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Something I find very frustrating in the writing/reading community is the almost total lack of craft discussion. And I think it ties into AI a little, and I’ll get to that.

I wish I could say things were different before some specified time, but to be honest, I’ve always had a hard time finding people who want to discuss the nitty gritty nuts and bolts of writing craft. Discussing Craft, discussing what tools are available and how and why to use them, what effect they caused and how a different tool or technique might have a different effect, etc., etc., etc., is legitimately the best way for any artist to learn, but I see a lot more posts about “Here’s how you get that glossy effect on shiny tile floors” and lists of brushes to download and such like from visual artists than I do from writers.

This all resurfaced recently because an old friend of mine mentioned once again the dire state of the criticism landscape, in that all discussion about a piece of media and what it does and how it does stuff is flash-in-the-pan these days. Comes out right around release of the Thing as some kind of review of whether you should/shouldn’t interact with it, and no one wants to talk about it a month later. Obviously, this is detrimental to genuinely thoughtful critiques and careful dissections of a piece of media because that stuff takes time and thought, but I wish I could say it surprised me.

Most audience members for really anything are not the critiquer types. They don’t really think that deeply about how media works and why. They want a thumbs up or thumbs down, and a lot of the time they don’t even care why or how that was the conclusion, or even why that conclusion applies or who it applies to. That’s…fine. It’s not how I do things, but hey, fine.

But this does contribute to the overwhelming void of writers’ and storytellers’ craft and skillset being discussed. Because if no one cares, and it doesn’t seem to directly contribute to marketing or sales…it’s not going to be a focal point.

How someone sewed a story together matters so much more than their ingredient list. You could hand two people the same recipe for macarons and that does not mean both will be equally successful, because macarons are fucking hard. A blueberry muffin and a blueberry donut do not require the same skillset and they do not have the same effect on people.

And goddammit, AI slop is just a list of tropes blended into a slurry with absolutely no craft or intent to make anything. You don’t have a muffin or a donut. You have Slop.

You can eat Slop if you want to, I guess, but it’s not real enjoyable.

And to make less Sloppy things, you gotta figure out how to actually make a muffin or a donut or whatever the hell else you wanna make. And to properly advertise against Slop, you’ve got to talk about how everything should be fluffier than your last book because you’ve been working very hard on your egg-beating by hand. Because AI can’t beat eggs at all.

But when people don’t talk about Craft, people never learn how to talk about Craft even though it’s now a feature of fighting the Slop. A lot of people don’t even know how to consciously use it.

Some years ago, a fanfiction writer I was friends with at the time kept bragging about how “prose-y” her writing was, because someone had mentioned in a comment that they really liked how she used prose.

If you know what the word “prose” means, you are currently staring at your screen as flabbergasted as I was at the time. “Prose” is not a quality or component or technique. It’s literally just…narrative writing. The commentor basically said “I like how you write.” Which is nice. But the reader was so unable to articulate what they liked specifically that they just found a fancy way to say “Hey, I really liked that!” and the writer was so unaware of craft that she thought that was a specific compliment about something specific in her style.

There’s a place for “I really liked that” and it’s definitely fanfiction. But even in fanfiction, there’s a reason people want to read their 42 coffeeshop au about the same two damn characters, and it’s not because of the unique tropes. It’s because this author characterizes Blorbo Jones with a sharp staccato sentence rhythm that really invests you in the way he thinks, and that other author describes that coffee bar so well you think they may have actually built one and good god do you feel like you live anywhere they set a story.

And that’s Craft.

And it’s not just casual readers and marketing execs and journalists or hobby fanfiction writers and such that have utterly blinded themselves to how writing Works.

Let me illustrate with another anecdote that still frustrates me: some years ago on Twitter, I asked people for their recs for books they were impressed with the craft of, because I desperately wanted to delve deep into excellent craft for inspiration. Approximately one, maybe two, people of the probably dozen or more responses—and they were not fandom people, they were mostly original writers of some stripe or another—had any idea what I was even talking about. I was flooded with responses of “I don’t know what that means, but I liked...”

But there are things I think were skillfully, excellent crafted that didn’t quite jibe with my soul, and there are things that I absolutely frolic around in that...are...eh. Well. They were assembled somehow, at some point, even if it has the workmanship of a Cybertruck. I tried to explain to some responders, and they genuinely had no idea how to gauge what the skill of a book looked like.

Things that make me want to frolic have some positive points to hone in on, but fundamentally I do not want to make a fun, comfy, but deeply structurally unsound treehouse. I like making fancy complicated treehouses that don’t even rock when you jump in them that use all sorts of fun tricks to make new kinds of joists and ooooh look at that floating staircase, how did you even make that?

But a lot of people are just like, “That was fun,” and stop there. And that’s okay. It is. But it’s such a predominant flavor of media response right now that...everything else seems to not matter. I can remember one multi-trad-published author who loved to talk up his books in terms of tropes and how he wanted to try to write something reminiscent of basically every genre of anime. And yet when I tried to read his multiple books, they kept hitting wrong every time because all of his seams were showing and loose nails were jabbing at me. He blended tropes up into chunky soup and forgot he was supposed to be writing a story, not marketing something.

If the appeal of a story was a list of tropes/components in it, I would be equally satisfied with a TvTropes page as a I am with a book or a manga or a TV series. And I’m not. I’m quite certain most people are not. And that means the ingredients aren’t what matter, it’s how they’re mixed and baked, and people only ever want to go, “Ooooh, love that you used vanilla frosting!”

I think a lot of authors might be more confident and find their own style and voice if they...knew how to recognize what those things are, and what they consist of. Because it consists of your little funky writing quirks. How you pick your metaphors for characters early and how you pick each of your settings to match what’s going with that motif and the character’s internal state. It’s how you always give your character a moment alone before or after a hard conversation so that you can debrief your reader on the situation and pause before or after and intense moment to handle so the character and the reader can take stock and introspect and give them moments to feel. It’s how you spin your three-time phrasal repetition into repeating sentences into repeating paragraphs because it gets bigger and bolder with each repeat of the idea, and it needs to be repeated three times like a fractal growing ever larger.

That kind of thing.

Not what’s in your chunky soup.

As a writer, I love hearing that you like my staircase or my nice treehouse floor. But what I really crave, what will really send me through the moon, especially from my editors and critique partners and whatnot, is not “Wow your floorboards are nice and sturdy,” but “Oh, goddamn I love how those weird joists are giving the floor just the right amount of bounce.”

Because fucking I worked hard on that shit, and I want people to notice the actual work, not just the results. For the most part writing craft should be invisible. You don’t want people noticing how things are built if they’re not looking for it, because that means you Fucked Up probably at least 8 times out of 10. Keep your seams inside the shirt with all the messy, knotty tie offs flattened into the hems to keep them from being visible and rubbing against any sensitive skin. I love when I manage that.

But people paying attention to the blood, sweat, tears, and soul I poured into something, finding all that work, acknowledging it, and maybe even wanting to learn from it? That is a kind of ascension to a holy land that is unachievable by simply providing a seamless experience.

And not only is it how other writers learn…it’s how I learn. I need to know what feels off and weird as well as what went fucking fantastically because…that’s how I know what techniques I pulled off well, and what would maybe be better off saved for a different effect because that’s not what I wanted.

Literacy rates are some of the highest they’ve ever been, but comprehension is such and writing craft is such that people don’t think anything of it more than they let words spill out of their mouth unthinkingly.

But stories aren’t put together unthinkingly. They don’t just spill out. Not good ones. Not ones that matter.

#writing #could this be edited a few more times?#yeah probably #did I write this at 4-5 am?#yes #should I really wait to post it?#am I doing that?#obviously not

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novaursa · 4 months ago

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Can I request a Cregan Stark x Reader fic? I really want to see more Dark!Cregan themes so with that in mind here’s my idea sorry if it’s long!

The reader is Jaces twin sister and has always taken to charity work, specifically tending to the ill and injured. She enjoys creating new medicines as well as different procedures/treatments to injuries, most of them tend to lean towards women thought as that’s where there is so much more to discover. It’s been said had she been born a man she may have been a maester, however the life of a septa was not for her either for she was nothing if not the blood of the dragon. She has the temper and tongue to go with it to the point of need to keep her practicing small and quiet as she’s clashed with the faith and their beliefs of a lady learning such things (thought it’s more then likely that she incurred such wrath for simply being better at it then them). Enter the betrothal, Rickon is about 2-3 years old needing a mother the Warden of the North a new wife, Rhaenyra seeing a good opportunity to gain an ally through blood jumps at the chance to join the houses much to her daughter’s dismay. Reader is super rude and standoffish with him within the confines of propriety, she practically a master with cutting remarks. However she LOVES Rickon as he’s her salvation (believing it’s a lost cause to try for children when he already has an heir) and it drives Cregan NUTS he is after all just man and man that has been with out the feel of woman for years now. Reader is practically perfect if it weren’t for how much she dislikes him, his son loves her, his staff love her, his people love her. Hell even his banner men even do since she has so many of their wives ears. Here’s where the dark 18+ stuff starts, reader has actively started to get on his nerves with the disrespect so Cregan starts tracking her moonblood with the intention of ‘putting a babe in her to calm her’ (classic sexiest era man brain but stick with me) he knows the reader is attracted to him whether or not she wants to admit it. He’s seen her get hot and bothered looking at him during training. All of it comes to head though when she throws the insults of savage northerner at him and he snaps, “I can show you savage princess” with a small display of strength, ripping the front of her dress and grabbing her neck to push her shocked face up to his (very dub-con vibes) he ends up just keeping her in his chambers for the whole of her fertile week, doing everything from licking, to fingers to his cock. He ends up getting her pregnant with Westeros first successful triplet birth. By the time Luke’s petition rolls around and they go to support him, the triplets are a few months old and she’s already pregnant again. Haven’t fallen completely for him (All due to his slight manipulations)

You can pick if reader is a dragon rider and if they’re Valyrian features are more prominent or they look more like a bastard or have bits of both!

This feels like so much and I’m sorry if it’s too long I just wanted to make sure I gave like a good description of characterizations. Your writing is so amazing and well detailed! Please delete this if you are uncomfortable with anything I requested! I was so happy when I saw you had your requests opened for my birthday month I took it as my own little sign. 🫶🏼🫶🏼

Hope this finds you well and in good health!

Requests are still fucking closed!

Did you read what is posted?!

Did you!?

This just tells me how a lot of you are ignoring everything on purpose.

If I see this request again, or something similar in my inbox when requests are open, it will be deleted.

You are not getting a head start before others. You wanna play in my backyard, you'll play by my fucking rules.

Get in the line!

#inbox #requests are fucking closed

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canmom · 1 year ago

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Hello! I absolutely love your blog, everything from your festival recounts to animation analysis and programming (one of tumblr's recommended posts was the one where you made your own rasteriser, and I liked your attitude in what I've read so much that I'm gonna attempt to conquer my 3-year-long grudge against using opengl during college and do something similar now that I'm a bit older and have no deadlines :D).

But anyway, I have 2 questions (sorry if there's easily accessible answers, tumblr search is not helping): 1. During your animation nights, does the screen stay black while everyone watches their own video while you provide commentary? I haven't caught any yet but maybe someday! And 2. do you have any youtube channels or just one-off video essays that you like that also cover animation/directors? Or, even programming lol.

Sorry for the long ask have a nice day!

hiii! i'm very touched that you like my dorky eclectic blog <3

For the Animation Nights, I just stream the video over Twitch from local sources on my computer, typically by playing the video in mpv and recording it in OBS. This is obviously not ideal from a video quality perspective, but it's the easiest way to watch video in sync without making everyone download files in advance. Then we all chat in the Twitch chat box (in large part to crack stupid jokes, it's not that highbrow lmao). I've gotten away with it so far!

As for youtube channels, I can recommend...

anime production/history (i.e. sakuga fandom)

SteveM is likely the most sakuga-fan affiliated anituber. He makes long, well-researched and in-depth videos on anime history, usually themed around a particular director or studio.

Pyramid Inu might be my fave anituber - very thoughtful analysis of Gundam, obscure mecha anime and oldschool BL and similar topics. tremendously soothing voice too.

The Canipa Effect does excellent deep dives into the production of specific shows, both western and anime. I appreciate the respect he gives to the Korean animators of shows like AtlA in particular!

Sean Bires's 2013 presentation on sakuga is pretty foundational to this whole subcultural niche, and a great place to get an introduction to the major animator names to know and significant points in the history of anime. unfortunately a couple of the segments got slapped down by copyright but the rest holds up!

animation theory (for animators and aspirants)

I'm going to focus here on resources that are relevant to animation in general, and 2D animation. if I was going to list every Blender channel we'd be here all week :p

New Frame Plus is one of the best channels out there for game animation, describing in tightly edited videos how animation principles work in a game context and analysing the animation of various games. highly recommend

Videogame Animation Study is similar, examining the animation of specific games in detail

the 'twelve principles of animation' (defined by Disney's Ollie Johnston and Frank Thomas) remain the standard approach to animation pedagogy; there are various videos on them, but Alan Becker (of Animator vs Animation) has quite a popular series. I haven't actually watched these but many people swear by them! Dermot O'Connor expands the list to 21. Note that some of the terminology can be a little inconsistent between different animators - c.f. 'secondary motion'...

Dong Chang is an animator at Studio NUT, who produces a lot of fantastic, succinct videos on standard techniques in the anime industry, timesheet notations, etc. etc. Studio Bulldog, a small anime studio, are a good complement; they focus more on douga than genga and are generally a bit more traditional.

programming

big topic here, I'm going to focus on game dev and tech art since that's my field. but also some general compsci stuff that's neat

SimonDev - graphics programmer with a bunch of AAA experience, fantastic explanations of advanced optimisations and some of the more counterintuitive aspects of rendering

Acerola - graphics programmer who makes very detailed guides to a variety of effects with a very rapid and funny 'guy that has seen monogatari' editing style. When he's good, he's really good. His video on water is probably the best one I've seen (though I can recommend a couple of others).

TodePond - the most charming, musical videos about recursion and cellular automata you've ever seen. less programming tutorial and more art in themselves.

Ben Eater - known for his breadboard computer series, a fantastic demonstration of how to go from logic gates up to the 6502 with actual hardware. worth watching just for how clean he puts the wires on his breadboards like goddamn man

Sebastian Lague, Useless Game Dev - both do 'coding adventure' style videos where they spend a few weeks on some project and then document it on Youtube, resulting in a huge library of videos about all sorts of fascinating techniques. great to dive into

Freya Holmér - creator of the 'shapes' library, makes videos on mathematical programming, with gorgeously animated vector graphics. Her video on splines is a particular treat.

There are definitely many more channels I can recommend on these subjects, but I'll need to dig into my history a bit - unfortunately I need to rush out right now, but hopefully that should be good to be getting going with!

#animation #programming #anime #3dcg #computer graphics

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steelheart-redux · 2 months ago

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how often do you draw/how do you manage to do. that much work (uploading a comic every tuesday and thursday(?)…) is there any tips you use to save time and also sanity. also hi your comic is really good both art and story wise…

hello!

well. how do i update 2-3 times a week. i will be honest one part of it is just that i am kind of nuts. do not try to match my update schedule unless you also have the Evil Need To Output Pages As Fast As Possible. it is perfectly okay (and frankly more normal) to update at a slower pace. i just naturally draw very very quickly, and am going a little bonkers from having these guys stuck in only my head for 2 years.

but in terms of actual advice. most of my advice is aimed at people who live at the whims of their dysfunctional brains, so it boils down to making the creation of comic pages Not An Arduous Task.

for me, that comes in the form of doing as much work as possible upfront.

i keep comic planning (writing the story, researching things, scripting if i do that, thumbnails, etc.) a fairly separate thing from actually making the comic panels. i make Big Decisions and set up everything i need page-wise on days that i have more motivation, to make it easier to do work on days i have less.

for example, say i'm feeling pretty foggy today, but i know I wanted to get page 54 done. So I go, and instead of seeing a completely blank document (scary!), i see this:

the composition is already there, the dialogue is decided (though admittedly i do change that a lot), and i already have a zarian render ready to go. the thinking is done! i just have to do the legwork, which at that point is pretty mindless. i watch a lot of youtube while i do these.

i also organize my pages in a weird way that i find rewarding, but this answer is pretty long already lol. i'll elaborate if asked.

so that's sanity. as for time, i've talked about using 3d models for characters and props. you don't have to make them if you don't know how, i know csp(?) has built-in asset libraries, and there's plenty of stuff online. make color palettes, if you can! i didn't know procreate had a color palette feature for way too long!!!! also, reuse backgrounds! please reuse backgrounds. if you're like me and get kind of squinchy about doing it, just blur it (comic style allowing) or use props and characters to cover up more noticeable things, and/or draw over things to make it slightly different. i've used the same background panel six times in the past few pages. did you notice?

lastly, don't beat yourself up for not following your planned page creation schedule to a T. things happen. life happens. it's okay. but also, if you're like me, know there might be some days where you do have to give yourself a bit of a kick in the pants to get things going. all the stuff i talked about above is designed to make that easier.

i hope this makes sense, and thank you for reading!

#askbox #asides #behind the redux

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maxcatz · 7 months ago

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raine whispers body + general headcanons and kind of a redesign !!! or just how i view them idk !!!!!!

shirtless warning idk also there’s a 𝓕𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 joke in here

some yap below if you please

* I read a post a while back from @/dazeddoodles about how their body type would be muscular but it’s hidden underneath some chub and I really liked that idea but I don’t really know how to incorporate that into my drawing because I cannot draw muscle for the life of me so bear with me

* I kinda wished the witches in TOH had more animalistic features so that’s why I gave them the bat ears, tail and the ear tufts - also I thought the bat ears would be cool and them having more bat like abilities like echolocation (I hc that bards have more sensitive ears than most witches and better hearing so that’s also part of it)

* The rings and piercings are just because they’re a little queer critter (they take their rings off around eda dw)

* The alto clef tattoo is because they play the viola (ITS NOT A VIOLIN.) and the star tattoo is them matching with Darius & Eda hehe

* I honestly liked their pre time skip hair color more so I added some more of that

* I gave them a stubble because I hc that they went on testosterone (and top surgery scars)

* Around 5’6 but wears heels to appear taller (i’m bad at incorporating height into my drawings shh)

some silly headcanons

• Listens to all types of music, like they can find appeal in literally anything

• Produces their own music alongside working with the coven heads for the government and stuff (the art that Dana made of them and the BATTs going through their vinyls rotates through my head forever)

• Fav season is winter/autumn, they despise being to hot especially at night (I hc that the boiling isles has a warm climate because of the boiling sea so it gets really hot there during the summer)

• Horror movie geek + likes a lot of crime podcasts that they ramble to Eda & Darius about

• Likes Peanuts (not the actual nut as in Charlie Brown) and Muppets

• Love language is physical touch (yapped about in a different post and it won’t let me link it for some reason)

• Talks with their hands a lot and sometimes hits people in the face on accident (they feel terrible afterwards)

• Autistic, normally gets fixated on music related things and will buy every CD or record they can find of their current favorite artist

• Really good at flirting but sometimes they do it on accident and they’re really confused when Eda/Darius are flustered as fuck from something they said

#me try not to mention raedius challenge impossible!#my art #yap session #the owl house #toh #toh fanart #toh redesign #i think?#toh headcanons #raine whispers #raine toh #raedius #raeda

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erintoknow · 6 months ago

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2024 reading roundup

i managed to read over a 100 books this year, which is, personally nuts, for me as a pace, especially when i feel busier then ever. the joys and benefits of downtime at the desk job, i guess? the bulk of what i read is YA which is ostensibly for professional reasons as a ya librarian but i was still able to sneak in a few decent adult grade books at least

this is probably also the most trans fem authored fiction i've read in a single year (hooray), in large part things to having a resource like @thetransfemininereview now whereas before i just kinda out in the woods poking at rocks with a small stick, praying the library will pick things up

so like, here's a sampling of some books and a few thoughts; trans fem authored books listed first ofc ofc:

These Fragile Graces, This Fugitive Heart by Izzy Wasserstein

goodreads says i read this in december but i swore i picked it up over the summer - anyway, transfem protag, transfem author, sorta cyberpunk noir murder mystery deal. really enjoyed this book, especially with how it played with cyberpunk genre conceits while still feeling like it's not just importing stuff unchanged from the 80s.

The Raven Tower by Ann Leckie

i'm still stuck waiting for a library to get the Translation State ebook in so i thought i'd give Leckie's fantasy novel a spin; this was great. i'm uncultured swine apparently (joke) so i didn't pick up on the very end that at least half the book was a twist on Hamlet but i was on board from pretty much first page. the use of 1st and 2nd person with the narrator being a character in the story telling the events of the novel to another character in the story was great. loved the world building and finished the book hoping Leckie will come back to this concept for another go in the future

might be my top book that i read in 2024?

The Sapling Cage by Margaret Killjoy

i really want to talk about this book, but i'm not sure what to say. i didn't realize going in that this would be YA (just because the protag is teen doesn't always equal YA and all) but, yeah, it's very YA. it feels like a gender flipped tamora pierce novel and i gather that was extremely intentional. our trans girl protag trades places with her best friend who was promised to a coven of witches and 'disguises' herself as a girl so she can do so

i liked the book and i'm looking forward to the continuation but the whole thing kind of feels like a dream on review after reading, specific details are hard to grasp onto. the narrative voice of protag feels a lot younger to me then 16, more like 12 or 11 maybe, which felt off? but didn't overly detract from the story which gets into some pretty high stakes!

the ending felt weirdly forced with the big-bad duchess just deciding not to press the advantage and go for the throne after everyone else is exhausted from fighting the big climatic battle, but sure, okay, this is a world where an entire country just collectively agreed to live by anarchist principles so clearly human cognition works differently in this setting

Magica Riot by Kara Buchanan

i read like three different magical girl books/novellas this year which feels wild. anyway, this was great cotton candy treat of a book. a solid entry in the 'everyone is nice to the trans girl for once' genre of trans fem fiction, our protagonist gets to become a magical girl, make friends, and save the day, hooray! it looks like this is going to be a series, which yes, sure, i'm sold

A Little Vice by Erin Elkin

i picked this up on a whim without really knowing what i was getting into and ended up really enjoying it. trans fem egg protagonist is stuck on the sidelines while the plot of a magical girl show plays out at her school with her best friend as one of the lead members. lotta angst and big feelings in this one. i understand this was originally a scribblehub serial? it certainly seems to follow in the scribblehub tradition of 'make as oblivious a headcase of a trans fem egg as possible' but whereas i've bounced off of that before the combination of addressing dsyphoria/angst/and sunk cost fallacy got me hooked - you know i love my sunk cost fallacy characters. also, i wanna add: the metatextual conceit with how each chapter is framed was a really cute touch and really completed the whole vibe

and a sampling of some non trans fem work i chewed through this year:

A Magical Girl Retires by Park Seolyeon, translated by Anton Hur

i picked this up after seeing it get a lot of positive press and... i don't know? maybe it's because i'm missing something about the culture context the book was written in / released into, or because magical girl stuff largely missed me as a kid (i got sucked into digimon instead of sailor moon), but this really fell flat for me. like, i wouldn't call it bad but it felt stale and kind of a surface level take? maybe i would feel better about this book if i hadn't been lead to believe going into it that it was saying something deep and profound

Compound Fracture by Andrew Joseph White

this book fucking rocked, let's be clear - it might be my top non-trans fem authored novel of the year? our protag is a trans boy in an old appalachian mining town who's family has been in a generations long bloody and violent feud with the sheriff's family dating back to a coal miner strike. YA gets a lot of rightly deserved derision i think (i've read enough stinkers this year) but White knocks it out of the park every time and this one was no exception.

Old Wounds by Logan-Ashley Kisner

horror story where a trans boy and his ex, a trans girl while running away to california get stuck in a small town where locals sacrifice a girl every year to the local monster - so who in this scenario gets to decide who counts as a girl?

this was a really fun book, full stop, no notes. easily in my top 5? 10? for the year and not just because i share a name with the trans girl.

The Girl in Question by Tess Sharpe

the sequel i didn't know i wanted, or existed - a follow up to Sharpe's previous book, The Girl's I've Been, which was a fasted paced thriller that kept you engaged even has it jumped back and forth between past and present. The follow up here is more of the same, and while i don't think it follow recaptures the magic, it manages to take the same basic premise and both up the stakes and add a new twist on events that i still came out with a pretty good time

Against Technoableism: Rethinking Who Needs Improvement by Ashley Shew

surprise non-fiction entry - this was a really great and thoughtful little book on how we currently approach ability aids and technology and how we might do better, if you see it, i recommend picking this one up

Some Desperate Glory by Emily Tesh

what if ender's game but not by a homophobe? okay, that's a bit reductive. Some Desperate Glory follows Kyr, a child solider who grew up in a fanatical fascist cult on her painful and reality bending journey to learn empathy. Kyr never really becomes a 'good' person by the end of the story, and she's aware of that, but her journey through self deprogramming her monstrous beliefs set to a backdrop where humanity lost the war (and their homeworld) against an alien empire was way better executed then i expected going in. this book is going to be peak 'your mileage may vary' but is absolutely worth giving a shot

#book reviews #bookblr

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timegears · 6 months ago

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halo . she/him . 25 . white . my wife ❤️

art blog . ko-fi . toyhouse . artfight

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

✦ i like pokemon (main series, pmd, and anime) a whole lot! it's my lifelong special interest. i also like fan projects such as on borrowed time and the rebornverse (mostly for rejuvenation).

✦ currently rewatching all the pokemon anime for the second time! i'm on johto league champions (season 4) right now.

✦ i'm working on an original pmd story called ties that bind and will post about my ocs a lot.

✦ my other most frequent interests are in stars and time, utdr, legend of zelda (particularly tp and botw), hunter x hunter, and pinnipeds. deltarune (and undertale by proxy) is my main hyperfixation rn.

✦ i really love my wife.

✦ i'm a digital artist and my art blog is @primarinite! my art is f2u with credit. go nuts.

✦ i have an 18+ (though not necessarily nsfw) blog for stuff that i'm too shy to put on main. ask off anon if you want it <3

✦ tags i use (subject to change, all of them except my pet tags are tagged on this post for ease of access):

bwark: my posts

wonder map: my art

ttb: my tag for ties that bind-related stuff

bug/minnie/maizie/harley: my/my family's cats

character tag: posts i tag with characters from media i enjoy

[character name] tag: different from the above. for posts actually involving the characters i really like

fav mons: my favourite pokemon

anipoke lb: my liveblog tag for rewatching the pokemon anime

hz lb: my liveblog for briefly rewatching horizons

friede abortion au: my wife and i's tag for our weird obsession with friede

wonder mail: asks

sky jukebox: music

i know people don't take dnis seriously but whatever i'm going to block you if i see any bigoted shit (including zionism and transmisogyny) and/or fetishizing of pedophilia and incest, including in fiction. idgaf about discourse but these are my boundaries.

minors can follow but be aware that i post nsfw jokes (just jokes, not actual nsfw) and i'm forgetful of tagging them.

i would love to be tagged in anything related to my interests but if you want specifics i would love: the popplio line, revali, siffrin, koraidon, iono, seals/sea lions. i don't always see things i'm tagged in so if we're mutuals feel free to dm it to me!

previous urls: eonveil, admete, multitypes

that's everything i think. thank you for reading and have a swagful day <3

#pinned #my tags:#bwark #wonder map #ttb #character tag #fav mons #anipoke lb #hz lb #friede abortion au #wonder mail #sky jukebox

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falmerbrook · 3 months ago

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Prologue thoughts!

Under read more for spoilers

Of course it was wonderful getting to see Skordo, Gabrielle, and Vanus again since they are some of my favorite characters. It's clear that the voice actors for Skordo, Gabrielle, and Vanus haven't done these voices for awhile because the delivery of all 3 of them was slightly different (no hate to them or the directors because I probably only noticed this because I'm autistic about this game) but it drove me a little nuts until I got used to it by the very end of the quest lol. I prefer the old inflections for Skordo and Gabrielle but I think I really liked Vanus's voice acting here actually. I think it fit him better. It's a better mix of annoying and mature rather than mostly annoying lol. I feel like they were all written a little differently too (most noticeable with Skordo), although that isn't too surprising because I imagine at this point they are being written by different writers. I'll probably hold off on my full opinions on their writing until we get the full story though.

Oh also they finally decided on how Vanus's name is pronounced and now it's consistent (in the base game it was the American van-us or vahn-us depending on the voice actor). At the exchange of Gabrielle's name now having two pronunciations lmao

I loved the new Mages Guild outfits! Wow they looked so good (especially compared to the old ones, which have been some of my least favorite in the game)!! Vanus's new hair cut was cute too! I guess he was feeling nostalgic.

I'll admit, I'm a but apprehensive about the writing. There wasn't anything bad in the prologue or anything, and it's hard to put my finger on, but I think having characters who haven't been featured in years really highlighted how the general writing style has changed a bit. I think because I like these characters and it's exciting for them to finally go back to the Worm Cult and Molag Bal storyline I feel like my hopes are a lot higher than if this was a disconnected original story. Like, I really want the storyline to be good, so I'm more worried that it won't be. I'll have to save that opinion for when it comes out though.

This is random but the flashy effects on the enemies were kinda blinding. I'm not usually bothered by the effects in this game but WOW that final battle hurt my eyes. I've always agreed with the there feedback that needs to be a way to turn off some of the flashy effects for those with photosensitivity issues, but now I really think it should probably be a bit more of a priority.

Anyway, my theories/predictions!

So there was a note (I think it was in the underground Mages Guild area?) that briefly mentions that the Wormies are in Northern Rivenspire for the Remnant, which I assumed was referring to the Lightless Remnant. Unfortunately I don't think the prologue stuff has been added to UESP yet so I can't find what it exactly said so maybe I misunderstood, but I thought that they were going to address that Verandis returning from Coldharbor in Markarth might've caused an issue with whatever deal he made with Bal over the Lightless Remnant. They didn't really do anything with that nugget of info so maybe it was just supposed to be a reference or maybe they'll go somewhere with it? I mostly just wanted to point it out since I haven't seen anyone else do it.

Among the mortals of the enemies we fight in this one that make up the new Worm Cult, almost all (if not all? I didn't pay that close of attention) of them were Argonians or Khajiit. That's interesting. I mean, given we will be going to an island off the coast of Black Marsh it makes sense there will be a lot of Argonians among their ranks, but the prevalence of Khajiit is interesting too.

From poking around it looks like I'm not the only one who thought of this, but I wonder if this story is building up to Vanus and Mannimarco's final battle at the end? Us killing Mannimarco in the Main Quest already kinda screwed up that part of their timeline since he was originally supposed to die (and become a lich I believe?) in his final battle with Vanus, but maybe they'll end this storyline with that battle and have him come back as a lich for it? If they do go with that, we might be seeing Vanus die.

^ on the note of returning characters dying, there sure are a lot of them in this upcoming story. I bet one of them is gonna die. I don't have a reason to think this it's just a vibe.

Skordo and Gabrielle will be major characters... going up against Molag Bal (maybe)... Meridia looking temple... screaming crying throwing up. Don't tease me ZOS. Where is he!!!

RIP Vanus

#mine #eso #eso spoilers

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yandere-romanticaa · 1 year ago

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To the anon who was asking abt sex! Here’s my two cents based off of experience..

1. Cockwarming is not like,,, pleasurable. Like when I read fics abt it and the reader is all squirmy and whatever it really doesn’t make sense. If the guy isn’t moving then it doesn’t really feel like anything, and it gets a little uncomfortable after a few minutes of no movement. It’s kinda like using a tampon. I definitely think that the pleasure derived from this is more mental than physical. Only the guy really gets anything physical out of it.

This kind applies to vibrators too. Like internal vibrators are not crazy stimulating but it is enough to make you distracted. But to each their own I suppose.

2. Sex in general. Internal stimulation (P in V) is good, and if I had to describe it I would say it feels like a bruise repeatedly. It’s hard to describe. Like it hurts but not in an ‘ow’ way, it feels good. Definitely a feeling that gets the legs shaking after repeated thrusting against that spot.

BUT, I cant finish without stimulation to my clit. It’s definitely different for everybody, but in my case I need clitorial stimulation or else it just feels like I’m on the edge the whole time (which, by the way, is a very unsatisfying feeling).

And thrusting it all in like in one go isn’t possible, remember that your vagina is one giant muscle, and when you stretch a muscle to hard and fast it strains and it doesn’t feel good. Foreplay is very helpful bc it loosens you up first, but even then you can’t force it in at one go. You kinda gotta start with the tip first and use short movements to slowly fit the whole thing in.

AND YES!!! THE STRETCH HURTS!!!! If you aren’t prepared properly or your partner just shoves it in it feels like your skin is being stretched (like a rubber band being stretched so much that it’s about to snap) and it’s a sharp pain and you could tear. SO FOREPLAY MATTERS!!!!

3. Cervix stuff… 😭😭😭 Guys. You can NOT thrust into the cervix. These fics are LYING TO YOU!!! It’s literally like trying to thrust through bone, the cervix is hard and even inserting thin items like a Q tip fucking HURTS. Unless it’s like monster fucking with ovipositors then it’s just straight unrealistic. A díck can NOT push through.

Some women find it painful even when their cervix is just thrusted against. (It doesn’t hurt for me so I don’t mind but majority of all the gals I’ve spoken to DONT like it. One of my friends even threw up during sex one time from the pain.)

4. Mind break. Not a real thing. Sorry. After so many rounds, no matter how high your drive is, the sex just starts to feel uncomfortable. Don’t push yourself past that point, listen to your body and know your limits. Because once it feels uncomfortable it kinda starts to hurt. This applies for the guys too. It just stops feeling good after a while and you leave that sort of lust-haze and become very lucid (post-nut clarity LMAOOO), which also makes you feel the discomfort even more.

So yeah, mind break via sex just isn’t a thing because your body literally has a limit. Overstimulation is real but your body has limits for that too. Like after so many orgasms I can’t touch my clit or it feels like a sharp pain. (Again, everyone is different but that’s just me)

And yeah. That’s all I can rlly think of.

This was an interesting read!!!!! I think that smut may or may not have poisoned my brain a little bit so this felt like a breath of fresh air. Of course, one should never take smut too seriously as it is primarily for entertainment, but it really does feel like things can mess you up if you're an inexperienced pookie such as myself!

Truth be told, sex scares me. Like, a lot.

I am in my early 20's and there is this societal expectation that I need a boyfriend. I also live in a fairly conservative country which honestly doesn't help me at all. And it's low key expected from couples to just go at a few months into the relationship, sometimes even after a few weeks depending on the person. That's how most of my friends/acquaintances did it anyway.

Just the thought of a man seeing me so naked and vulnerable like that, it brings tears to my eyes. It legit scares me so much. Buddy, if you see me in my birthday suit you are NOT going anywhere LMAO, you'll have to marry me, I'm sorry -

I've been called an uptight and boring prude for having this kind of mentality and I get it. But I can't help it, I just can't. I don't think I'll ever be able to have that kind of physical connection with anyone unless I know them inside and out 😓 I'm too scared and too insecure for my own good... I also have a few stretch marks on my stomach, which I really hate, I really do. I don't think I could handle the humiliation of another person ever seeing them.

#♥️ girlie says #🤍 anon asks

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