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emojellyace08 · 1 year ago

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Lookism Men x Female Reader "Their types on a woman" (J-High Main boys)

A/N: Hi fellow human! Sorry if I hadn't made any posts this past few weeks, I was taking a break and my laptop isn't working properly. Anyway, the important thing is I'm back making more Lookism (especially Danny content), so enjoi! :) Genre: Fluff☁️and slight angst? (for everyone) Warnings: NONE! just pure cuteness and sweetness I guess? Add in!: this post is also inspired by another Lookism Men (J-High boys) with a female reader. Though I can't really remember the acc or post so I'll just paste it in here incase I find it :) I'll probably make a part 2 about this

Daniel Park (Park Hyung Seok)

This man will be the biggest simp in the whole world. Will always look at you with that puppy eyes like 🥺👉👈 halk;hkld;ahfkl;ahf I love him so much

It's canon (kind of) that Daniel doesn't give a damn about how you look like for the most part. What matters to him most is that you respect everybody and treat them equally. But since the incident with Yui kind of traumatized him from finding true love, it also left and taught him a good and knowledgeable lesson. Since Danny went through lots of character development, he learned to himself that he can't just trust someone who acts nice and that he needs to know someone better if he really likes someone.

If you already interacted with his main body and haven't judge him for his looks just like a normal person would do or if you met this cinnamon roll on middle school when he's still being bullied by that fucker Logan, if you had the balls to save him from that mf congratulations! You made him interested in you!

If you also helped him in his homework or if you insists to spend some time with him like going out to the mall, patching his bruises when the bullies beat him up or if he gets in trouble with the gangs, and helping him out like giving him advices on his worst days even on the tiny things, he'll be head over heels for you (though he stills feel guilty that you're spending your money on him but you keep reassuring him that is fine) But if you're also the broke girl he can empathize more since he also faces this issues like his mom forcing herself to work just for him. Rich or not, fat or slim, girly or tomboyish, if you're overall kind, unjudgmental yet completely honest, and generous not just to him (in both of his bodies of course) but also to everybody without wanting anything in return, then you earned this man's respect and heart ;). I also headcannon that he's more into quiet and calm women since he's easily overwhelmed by noisy people and places. But even if you're the type of extroverted woman or the introverted type, as long you're nice and helpful then you'll catch his attention.

I feel like after having his second body he'll start to have the confidence to befriend you. At first he wouldn't make things obvious since he's still shy about his feelings for you since he wants to know you even more as you show your true colors. He'll also probably going to ask some advice on Jace and Zack about approaching you since he doesn't have that much of a romantic experience xD. Since you always treat him, he'll ask you to hang out with him like going to the mall to watch movies or going to the park and eating on every food truck or stand you see but he'll bring some of your friends too like Zack, Jay, Mira, Zoe, even Vasco to hang out so things won't be obvious.

If he enjoys your company and the energy you have, he'll ask you out more but this time is just the two of you (if he has the budget). Or if you're in the same class/school as you, he'll always ask you out to eat with him on lunch too making all his fangirls jealous lol. "You want a piggyback? No problem! Need help from your homework? I'll help you out!" Or even if you don't study at the same school, he'll still ask you out privately and if you accept it Daniel would be the happiest man alive and him just being here for you every time even if he's broke or mentally unstable too lol like how you company him too. Overall just him being there for you and ready to help while being sweet (please I just need a Danny in my life lmao).

And since he's a really shy and introverted person, he's afraid of opening up about his issues and insecurities. But knowing that you're a sweet person yet you don't sugar-coat things (no pun intended), he will probably talk about it with you even when he's still afraid of him being a burden to you. But if you reached out to him first if you noticed when he's acting down and strange, he'll appreciate and love you even more. An example of this when he writes a letter to you when he ran away. Since he can't express his self with words, he decides to write his thoughts on a piece of paper while confessing his problems and probably his true feelings to you. "Y/N I don't know how to tell my thoughts in the first place but seeing Logan back when I try to run away from my problems just kills me inside. It may sound selfish to you but I felt like a burden for you and especially my mom. But I thank you for being there for me in my darkest times, when you help me out from those bullies and you don't judge me by my looks. Though I just need time for myself now. Please don't look for me. You're really a sweet and honest person and that's why I love you, and I mean it and not just for being a friend. Though I don't expect you to reciprocate my feelings it back. The larva that waits for years to be reborn as a cicada decides to return back to it's shell and to not spread it's wings. I'm sorry". You'll definitely going to cry while reading the letters and words written on the wrinkly paper if you're really close to him. As the time he returns back home just imagine hugging him and scolding him for running away. "JESUS CHRIST DANIEL! DON'T RUN AWAY LIKE THAT AGAIN YOU'RE SCARING ME!" you hugged his small and chubby form while you stain his clothes with your tears. "Y-Y/N I don't know what I was thinking. I-I'm sorry I won't do it again".

Just be a green flag in general to him whether size, shape or form he's in. And bonus points for you if you treat his mom well ;).

Zack Lee (Lee Jin Sung)

Another approved simp here lol. Like this man is fine tf, ehem excuse me back to the topic

I feel like this man is insecure deep inside his tough shell. He really worked hard for his strength and in boxing to protect his friends like Mira and Johan since the cult incident. So he wouldn't be different with you if he sees you as a valuable and good person.

And remember when he's still a notorious bully and many people were afraid of him? (tbh I really hate him before when he beat Little Daniel before) I headcannon that no matter how hard he tries to be ignorant from other's comments about him he actually feels bad about the horrible things he have done yet he's still hesitant at first to change since he felt vulnerable if he listens to other people's gossip about him. Why is this so angst this is supposed to be fluff :(.

So if you tried to approach him when you noticed Zack's face had a bruise he didn't even know he has when he got into a fight, he'll be annoyed by you at first as why your talking to him. Do you know that his heart is only devoted to Mira? (Not that you're aware of so calm down boy). "Who the hell are you? Do you know that I only love Mira! She's the most beautiful person on Earth and I just can't hit on you sorry!" He continues to ramble that he likes someone else until he became speechless as you patch him with the extra band aid that you have on your pocket, you tip-toeing to reach his height as your warm and soft hands make contact with his open wounds while he froze. "I'm just trying to help and clean off your wound y'know. Don't worry I'm not hitting on you" you replied coldly yet with the same sweet tone on your voice that just makes him melt. This can't be happening, he likes Mira! She's been his crush since childhood! So why is he feelings butterflies in his stomach whenever you're near him??? (I love Mira so much but ahhhhh) Are you not scared of him? He's literally a bully in your school yet you chose to help him.

The thing is just like Daniel's preferences, what he likes about you is that you're free-spirited, you're a sweet and gentle person, honest and you're willing to help others. You also help him out with his ego-issues while giving him some constructive criticisms to work on himself. It may be a little bit hurtful on his part but he knows deep inside that you're expressing your thoughts that others can't tell to him because they're scared that he'll misunderstood it and beat them. But coming those constructive criticisms from your soft voice calms him even more and you want to bring out the best of him on his attitude. It may look like he's not listening, but trust me if he really likes you he'll lend his ears and mind for you.

Like Daniel, he'll be hesitant about his feelings first about you. Not because his insecure about himself but because he's insecure about it. He may look like a bad person on other people's eyes, he's DEFINETLY NOT THE TYPE to double-time two women. He likes Mira. Yet when he sees you eating lunch alone or just sitting on your desk on class and being quiet and minding your own business, he wants to approach and talk to you. "Wait is Mira absent? I guess sitting with Y/N in lunch won't be a bad idea." And he'll probably talk about his feelings for you to her. He's scared that if he confessed to him and you don't like like him back and that he's also going to hurt the other girl's feelings. That's why he'll conversate with the brunette. And despite liking Zack too Mira will definitely try to understand on what he's trying to say and will 100% support both of you. And Zack will also dress to impress xD. He'll flex his accomplishments to you "Y/N do you know that I'm a professional boxer? I won lots of boxing competitions y'know" he boastfully said while winking at you and being proud of himself. "But I thought you lost to Johan Seo-" "SHUT UP JIHO!" And will take you on "friendly dates" and will try to change his bad habits for him to be a good influence to you (though he will beat the sh*t out of everyone who ever tries to mess with you, not caring if you'll lecture him later).

Overall be nice, patient, be honest and understanding to him. And also take care of Zacky and he'll reciprocate it back :).

Vasco (Lee Euntae)

If the other two are simps, this man will follow you like a lost puppy lol

You know Vasco is innocent despite his gangster-looking body and face. This boy likes animals especially puppies! This man will also get superrrr excited when he sees you walking on the park with your dog (Will 100% approach you with a cute smile even if he doesn't know you lmao. It may freak you out but I told you Eun Tae is innocent so be patient about it). "Hello! Is this your dog? He looks so cute!" "Oh yeah he's a golden retriever." "Like a chihuahua?" "Oh no. Chihuahua is smaller than a golden retriever" you chuckled lightly at the tattooed male while his eyes sparkled even more as he bended down to reach the dog's height while apologizing to you about his mistake which you shrugged it off saying that it's okay. "Hi little dog, oh I mean woof woof!" AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Since this man has zero percent romantic experience, he's literally going to fall fast for you. He will also introduce himself to you if you're not classmates or study at the same school since he's excited to have a girl friend (ehem) that likes animals too! If you also find him interesting and you gave him his number, he will tell everything to Jace and the other Burn Knuckles members about you all the time. "JACE! I TALKED TO A GIRL TODAY HER NAME IS Y/N!" "Vasco keep your voice do- wait. WHAT! YOU TALKED TO A GIRL!!!"

If he also notices about how you're a gentle and caring person and also likes helping others without wanting anything in return, he'll literally catch a crush on you. Being an animal lover will definitely makes you and Vasco make less tense with each other and have a very special connection with each other.

And if you also taught him to understood things in his surroundings, he'll definitely appreciate your help! You know how this man isn't really conscious on almost everything even on the little dirty things so when he doesn't know what he's doing wrong. So he'll really listen to you if you explain it to him in a detailed yet understandable statement! You don't have to be completely smart but you're intellectual thinking can also help him understand you way better. He'll also let you call him by his real name if you're really close to him. (Also I can imagine the Burn Knuckles crying and cheering when you and Vasco became a thing. Y'know the FBI cheering meme? And yes they will do the Invisible Charlotte on you lmao).

And you know how his sense of justice and helping people can also get him through hard situations sometimes? Yeah it makes you worried when his hero complex gets him in trouble despite just wanting to help others who can't defend themselves.

So imagine just patching and treating his wounds while lecturing him. "EUNTAE! YOU CAN'T JUST BE INVOLVED WITH FIGHTS EVERYDAY!" you scolded him while he tries to hold back him crying. He doesn't even know if he's going to burst down into tears because you're angry at him or because of the sting and pain he feels when the soft cotton made contact on his wounded skin. "S-So you-you're telling me that I can't defend the weak? They're literally getting bullied Y/N". you sighed as he misunderstood on what you're trying to imply while he sniffs as he can't control the liquid pouring out from his brown-colored orbs. You sat beside him as you made eye contact on his sad ones. "You know Euntae, I understood you. It's okay to help others but you can't just always get into fights with everybody. I'm worried for you y'know". "But the bad guys won't stop hurting the innocent if I don't stop them" he replied while feeling wretched. "Because that's the sad truth. But evilness has a reason to spread". "Why?" he asks innocently. "Because the world wouldn't be balanced if we don't make mistakes. We will be perfect like Gods but emotionless like robots. And the reason why evil is taking all over us is to open the eyes of others on how our own world and our own kind has become corrupted and to solve it is to help others. I have no problems of you helping out Vasco. But it makes me worried on what is going to happen to you." "That's why I'm trying to be stronger!" he cheered and stood up while his warm tears are still rolling down on his face. "It's to protect others and to protect you too Y/N!" you smiled at his optimistic thinking as you ruffled his hair making his heart skip a beat. "And that's what I like about you Lee Euntae".

Jay Hong (Hong Jae Yol)

A mixture of a simp and a puppy lmao.

I feel like he doesn't really fall in love so easily (unless it's Daniel lol)

Since Jay is also a quiet person (who literally doesn't talk), so I bet he can't stand whiny and noisy girls (lmao pls don't attack me). I think he prefers women (if it's women ;) who leans more on the quiet and gentle side yet is still fun to talk and be around with. Video games on his apartment, hanging out in the mall or talking about fashion styles and brands are his way to go dates.

It's canon that he buys expensive gifts and brands for someone he likes so just expect him to just gave you 4 bags full of clothes and jewelry that almost anybody can't touch and buy for themselves. But despite him buying you everything that you want, he still hopes that you just don't like him because he's hot, mysterious and rich. He really wants someone who values him not just by his looks and social status. But if simple signs of helpful gestures is enough for you like him helping you out on your homeworks when you're in struggle or if you need a shoulder to cry on then Jay will be available 100%.

If you decided to approach Jay first, it's completely normal for him to be a bit shy and tense in front of you. He can really caught the attention of many women because of his beautiful features and good taste on fashion style while the other dudes just stare at him with envy. But if you really want to make friends with anybody, talking to Jay can be a challenge. Not only is that he don't literally open his mouth, he can't help but to feel nervous when a girl or literally anybody who approaches him since he's not used to it. Though after befriending him out of pure innocence and not wanting anything from him, he'll start to be more open about his interests and Jay will start to be more caring about you and just be himself in front of you and everybody else.

Just like the rest of the dudes, your sweet and warm personality can break the ice between the two of you and if he's starting to like you even more than just a friend, his affection would be more and more obvious. He will also patch you up and clean your wounds when you get hurt and he'll beat the sh*t out of everyone who tries to mess and hurt you (just like the other three boys). But he won't let you know why your bullies/enemies look like they've been used as a punching bag. He's also willing to give you his whole wallet full of cash if you can't buy your lunch (he'll still force you to take it especially if he knows you're the broke type lol).

Will probably start to learn sign language and Morse code with you so you can understood each other more lol (and talk about dumb shit a lot that only the two of you will understand lmao). But if you can already comprehend on what he's trying to express, he'll appreciate it and fall for you more considering how his close friends and family are the only ones who at least understand on what he's trying to pick up. And listen to him when he's ranting about his problems even though there are no words coming out of his mouth. He might even let out a sad whimper and a huff when he tries to suppress his feelings since he doesn't want to be seen as a burden especially in front of someone whom he really cherishes.

Just be a green flag. Don't just use him as a sugar daddy or he won't be returning the sweet treatment and attitude back at you. Actions speak louder than words after all.

A/N: my first ever fluff to be written about and yeah sorry if this sucks.

#lookism x reader #lookism x y/n #lookism x you #daniel park x reader #jay hong x reader #zack lee x reader #vasco x reader #lookism manhwa #lookism webtoon #lookism fic

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wreckedandpolemic · 1 month ago

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(Use as many/as few/none of these literally up to you I’m just happy to be here!)

White and gold!!!!! Girlie and Matty run into one of Matty’s exes/one of her exes out and about and one of them gets insecure and they fight about it? Maybe he/she was overly friendly to the ex?? Idk idk idk

this got long as hell. sorry/enjoy?

this is so good because you knowww he has some unreasonably gorgeous exes that you’re intimately familiar with from your extensive research before you started dating. so when you’re out with matty only a few weeks into your relationship and bump into an honest-to-god swimsuit model, it’s just about the worst case scenario. oh, my god, she shrieks. damn it, even her fucking voice is hot. matty? is that you? it’s been so long! and the bitch grabs him, pulls him into a hug, rubs her annoyingly pretty hands with their annoyingly perfectly manicured nails up and down his back.

tate, hi! matty grins, doesn’t take her eyes off her face. fucking tate? that’s not a real name. that can’t be her real name. you clear your throat impatiently. fuck, where are my manners? sorry, love. tate, this is my girlfriend. darling, this is tate, an old friend of mine. you look at her properly, her mile-long legs and buttery-soft blonde curls and tanned olive skin, and swallow thickly. tate shakes your hand and gives you a thin smile, deliberately wiping her hand on her skirt the second matty glances away.

oh, please. we were more than friends, matty, at least give me that. she gives you a look that says you won’t be around long. and i’ll be ready and waiting when you’re gone, then smiles winningly at your boyfriend. matty sighs. yeah, i guess so. hey, we were just headed to lunch, do you wanna join? your glare is blatant and unsubtle, and yet goes completely unnoticed.

i’d love that, she says, slipping her arm through matty’s. and he doesn’t even fucking stop her. as they walk, two beautiful people, arms linked and gossiping about a past you’ll never be privy to, you suddenly feel like a stupid fucking kid playing at a grown-up life. pressing a hand to your stomach, you grab matty’s arm. m’not feeling well, you murmur. i’m gonna head home. i’ll see you soon.

matty at least has the decency to look worried about you. you want me to drive you home, love? one look at tate’s smug face makes you shake your head. no, i’ll call a car. go enjoy lunch, someone should, you say with a weak little laugh. he kisses you quickly, waits for your car and waves as you peel away. you break down the second he’s out of sight.

you’re still feeling sorry for yourself several hours later, all cried out in bed with some shitty chick flick playing on your laptop, when your phone buzzes. how are you feeling, sweet girl?

like my boyfriend just went on a date with a swimsuit model. you answer on impulse. he calls you seconds later, and you stab the decline button near-viciously. you let the next three ring out, but the fifth time he calls, you pick up. just leave me alone. i don’t wanna do this with you right now. matty scoffs. do what? talk about how you’re feeling like an adult?

oh, great. patronise me. you know what, if i’m such a child, why don’t you and tate go and have dinner, too, talk about your grown-up feelings? you snap, eyes watering and breath short. your chest feels tight, something hysterical pressing on your lungs.

darling, matty says softly, in the way that makes you feel weak. i’m sorry, sweet girl. i shouldn’t have said that. i shouldn’t have gone to lunch with her, shouldn’t even have offered. it just didn’t even cross my fucking mind, he says, slightly sheepish. you’re the only fucking girl i want, haven’t even thought about anyone else since i first laid eyes on you.

you laugh weakly. that’s a line, and not even a good one. matty makes a mock-hurt sound. s’not a line, it’s the truth. i told you, i tried getting you off my mind and all i could think about was you. prettiest girl i’ve ever met. i was done the second i saw that gorgeous smile, princess. the nickname has your knees embarrassingly wobbly. knew i’d do whatever it took to get you to smile like that again. s’fucking killing me that i hurt you, darling.

you blow out a breath, heart swelling despite yourself. what are you gonna do to make it up to me? you ask, half-teasing. anything you want. he doesn’t miss a beat. would you fire ruby? you giggle.

baby, i’ve been trying to do that for months. she’s got a man on the inside in the hr department, or something. you huff out a quiet laugh. let me take you to dinner, anything you want.

you purse your lips. i don’t wanna go out for dinner, you say, letting a teasing lilt creep into your voice. in fact, i want you to come and pick me up, and show me exactly what you’re willing to do to get me back.

who do you think i am, princess? matty says, low and promising. i’m already outside.

#i’m sorry i can’t do angst with a bad ending for them i just can’t bring myself #matty healy x reader #matty healy angst #matty healy fluff #writing #angst #white and gold

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lgwifey · 1 year ago

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PERKS OF THE JOB

Elijah hewson x fem!reader

Summary : an interview leads to a phone call… and maybe more ? (I’m really bad at writing summary’s)

warnings : none ?

MASTERLIST

“I don’t think-”

“That’s correct y/n, you don’t think. I think and you interview.”

She blinked for a second as the middle aged man carried on walking ahead, looking down at her clipboard and letting her features drop as she looked back over the questions she’d been given to ask.

“Y/n ?”

The snap off her boss caused her to hurry up, trying to navigate the loose floor of the muddy festival in the heeled black knee high boots she’d been ordered to wear by the company’s stylist.

When she finally reached the cameras, without falling over somehow, she was created by the four musicians and her boss’s agitated expression.

“Guys, this is y/n. She’ll be the one interviewing you today. So the interview is for YouTube but it’s going to be published on a range of our socials.”

Y/n patted down her skirt before shaking everyone’s hands, leaving her clipboard on her chair for later on.

“Well I’ll leave you lot to get to know each other, if anyone needs me I’ll be at stage two with Alisha.”

Y/n gave a nod, allowing the older man to walk away whilst clocking the mocking face two of the camera operators where giving. She struggled to not laugh, a small smile on her face as she turned to the band.

“Hiya, so as Harry said I’m y/n, before we even turn the cameras on I’d just like to apologise for some of these questions, I literally begged him to change them but he’s refusing and I’d like to keep my job so if there’s anything you’d like for me to bring up in the interview please let me know so I can say I just swapped a few over for ones you all preferred. ”

Ryan gave a laugh, the other three following behind soon.

“What kind of questions are they if you’re apologising for them ?”

“Well let’s just say, from this sheet it looks like I’m interviewing U2. No offence Elijah but I usually like to make sure that the questions are targeted to each band member rather than just focusing on one.”

The brunette gave a laugh, sitting down on one of the seats like he’d been directed to do by another equipment operator.

“No offence taken.”

Y/n forced the blush off her face before sitting down as well, adjusting the pathetic excuse of s skirt that the wardrobes had gave her. Whoever designed this outfit had clearly never been to a festival.

The office buildings where dull, just like the basic black suits that all the male staff wore.

Y/n poured out the boiled water into the two mugs whilst Alisha carried on with her latest story on her latest obsession.

“Wait do you think I can get Harry to pay for my Rolling Stones tickets. I mean it is for work.”

She handed the light blue mug over to the excitable girl before nodding her head,

“I mean I did with my Leeds tickets, but I was interviewing people after . I’d still ask, worst he can say is no.”

“True, we’re too good at our jobs for him to even threaten to sack us girly.”

She blew a kiss before leaving to her office, the glamorous ‘periwinkle blue’ suit she’d recently bought. The other interviewer remained in the office kitchen, holding the hot cup in her hands to try and warm them up before she went back to typing up a manuscript to go alongside her last interview with an upcoming band.

When she finally worked up the willpower to go back to the typing, one of the new interns ran up to her with a mix of worry and confusion on his face.

“Urm, y/n ?”

She looked over from her laptop with a smile.

“Hiya Louis, what’s up ?”

“There’s someone asking for you on the phone, I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do.”

“Oh yeah, did you take their name?”

Worry spread on his face before he shook his head.

“Ok, just put them through to my line.”

He gave a blink.

“Line 4?”

Another blink.

“Im avoiding this manuscript anyways, I’ll just come to the front desk Louis.”

It was almost as if he let out a held breath before she swizzled around all her half-projects and let him lead her to the phone that was being held. He left her to answer, moving the phone to the end of the desk so he could carry on with any clients waiting for the desk.

“Y/n Y/l/n, how can I help?”

“Hiya y/n, we just wanted to call and let you know we think you did an amazing job with that interview-”

Her eyes widened as towards the end of the sentence the strong Irish accent was pulled away and a crash echoed through the phone.

“Sorry about him, we don’t let him speak to the outside world for a reason. This is Eli by the way, in case you didn’t know.”

A faint “that hurt” could be heard from the other side and her lips curled up into a small smile.

“No it’s fine, I’m glad you liked the interview.”

“Yeah it was probably one of the best we’ve been in. I just wanted to check that you hadn’t been killed by your boss for changing those questions for us, but I couldn’t find a contact for you anywhere.”

“Oh yeah don’t worry about it, he was slightly annoyed but like Alisha says, we’re too good at our jobs for him to even threaten.”

He laughed slightly, Louis giving Y/n a confused look when he noticed her twirling the end of her hair with her finger.

“Good to know,”

He paused for a second, y/n unsure if she was supposed to speak again only for him to appear a moment later,

“Look I was wondering if there was any way I could contact you in the future, you know because we loved you interviewing us.”

“Are you asking for my number Mr Hewson ?”

The other side went quiet and y/n had to force herself to not laugh when all she could hear on the line was “mate you’re so bad at this.”

“Urm yeah? But in a professional context ?”

“Of course, of course. Don’t worry I’ll dm it to you on insta, it’ll be easier than trying to say it and messing up a million times.”

“Oh yeah, makes sense.”

“Okay, goodbye Eli.”

“Urm yeah, bye.”

“Let Robert know I said hi.”

The line cut just after she heard something being thrown.

Sometimes the job had its perks.

#inhaler #inhaler x reader #inhaler x fem!reader #Elijah hewson #Elijah hewson x reader #Elijah hewson x fem!reader #musicians x reader #interview fanfic

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deartetsuro · 4 months ago

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req - hq characters (kuroo lol) saying 'i know, baby, i know' when babying/comforting yn. ervyabebwyrogbrw

please feel no rush/pressure for this and look after yourself :)

Ok igotchu pookie HWJSHAHAHS cuz I need it too. This one goes out to the girlies who crave academic validation 😋 (me)

Song: Mahal Kape Tayo — EJ Clarks, Tothapi

(this one is cute, it's basically "Love, let's go have some coffee" it's a very nice song comfort song and to just wind down to.)

Tags: hurt/comfort, being rejected from a school you really wanted to get into, still living with ur parents, your parents love him, fussy school systems, established relationship, fluff, lots of feels.

You sit down in front of your laptop in your room excitedly, squirming in your seat in anticipation waiting for the results of your college entrance test for your dream school. You studied really hard for those tests and made sure to maintain your GWA, and participate in extra curriculars so it'd look good in your admission application.

The portal finally loads, and you are prompted to enter your test ID to see if you were qualified for admission into your chosen programs.

Your heart sinks your eyes immediately lock onto the apology in the first line "We regret to inform you that after careful deliberation you have not met the standards set to be qualified for your chosen programs..." Something in you shattered, you did not qualify for even one program? "What...?"

You end up shutting off and closing the laptop before you have a chance to be sad about it, choosing not to process such news just yet. And the rest of the day ends up feeling like a fever dream. Just going through the motions, unwilling to accept what had just happened.

You snap out of your trance when your messages are being spammed by your boyfriend.

Tetsuro: Babe

Tetsuro: Baby

Tetsuro: Love

Tetsuro: I saw the post made by (insert university), and saw that the results just came out. How'd it go?

Tetsuro: I bet you passed for sure. Congratulations🥳

You decide not to beat around the bush and give it to him straight.

You: I didn't get in.

The chat bubble that signifies he's typing goes on and off, and finally stops for a while. Second turn into minutes, and you realize he went offline. (💀)

You wonder why he's taking so long. You lay in your bed moping, no tears yet, stuck between "I wanna break down and cry." and "I wanna do something about it."

Sure, you could send an appeal. But the thing is, the school, and programs you chose was highly competitive. What if you're met with yet another rejection?

After a while there's commotion that stirs outside your window, and you brush it off as your neighbors coming to have a chat with your parents. That is, until you hear your mother call out your name and say "Come outside! My son is here."

You sit in your bed confused, you think, Huh?? Duh, my brother lives with us what are you talking about? I see him all day everyday.

But you reluctantly get up and go see what she's talking about anyway. Upon leaving your room and exiting the house through the front door, you're surprised to see Tetsuro standing there with your parents holding a bouquet of flowers, and paper bags stuffed with goodies in one hand.

"Look *anak, he's been looking for you." Your mom chimes in mischievously, and gives you a shit eating grin, while your father only chuckles as he pats Tetsuro's back and reminds him "No funny business." before they turn around and head out to make a grocery run.

We bid my parents goodbye, then he steps forward and gives you a boyish smile, stretching his free arm out for you. "Hi... Sorry I didn't reply right away, I had to pick some stuff up."

You let out a sigh of relief and hug him "You scared me. Who does that?" He looks at you apologetically, as he wraps his arm around you. "I know, I'm really sorry. I was out to get these, — (motioning to the flowers) — and I wanted to get some extra stuff. Please let me make it up to you."

And you do. You nod into his chest, breaking away from the hug gently to lead him into the house and into the living room. "Sit down Tetsu, I'll get you somethi—" He interrupts, helping himself to our kitchen counter, placing down the flowers and paper bag. "No worries love, I got it. You've had a long day, just kick back and relax."

His words send a wave of warmth throughout your chest, finding comfort in him. You move closer to him, wrapping your arms around his waist as you whisper a small thank you into his shirt.

He smiles as he starts working on replacing the old flowers in the vase on the kitchen counter. He unwraps the new flowers, and arranges them, albeit a little messily, into the vase. You look over his shoulder, "It looks beautiful Tetsu." He smiles, giving it one last touch before setting it back to it's original spot. "I'm glad you think so." Your eyes follow his form as he goes to wash his hands before reaching into the paper bag to reveal...

"Now how does coffee and ice cream sound?" You can only giggle as he lifts up a whole tub of cookies and cream ice cream, and a jar of my favorite coffee. "That sounds like an amazing idea Tetsuro~"

He pulls a chair for me and he moves on to fix us our mugs of coffee the way we both like it. Setting my mug and a spoon down in front of me, and taking his seat beside me. "Here's your order miss~ And some ice cream, on the house." Rolling my eyes at his playful tone. "Gee thanks Tetsu..." He just chuckles and opens up the ice cream for the two of you as you dig in.

It's sweet really, how he put comfort before confronting the problem, allowing you to process what was going on. Patiently waiting for you to open up to him as to not overwhelm you.

"So... Do you want to talk about it?" There it is, the dreaded question. "About what?" "You know..." You know, and it stings really badly but you decide to play it down. "Tetsuro I'm okay. There are other universities..."

Tetsuro looks at you knowingly, but instead of speaking, he just pulls you into his embrace instead, in his embrace where you felt safe enough to be vulnerable. Through this simple action, he'd allowed you to acknowledge the squeeze in your heart when thinking about the joyous reaction of those accepted into their priority courses.

To feel your frustration, sadness, and even envy, as the weight of your own expectations crash down on you. "I worked so hard for this Tetsuro..." You sob into his chest, grasping at the fabric to anchor yourself. "All those late nights studying for the test, trying to maintain my GWA, all while participating in extra curriculars! I want nothing more than to be able to go there..." You bury yourself into his embrace, and he rubs your back.

"I know baby, I know." He pulls away to cup your cheeks, making eye contact. "I was there baby. I saw you, and I remember very clearly. There were times I had to remind you to sleep because you were up late studying." His eyes soften as he wipes your tears gently with his thumbs.

"Or to remind you to eat because you forgot about lunch while working for a project. Or walking you home because your training for contests didn't ent til 6pm and I didn't want you going home on your own that late."

"The thing is, I know for a fact that you are one of the most hardworking, — and not to mention, loveliest — students out there. So what if some automated university admission program can't see your worth then so what? Things won't always go the way we envision them, but I know you. I see you. And you are able to thrive no matter where you go."

His words were sincere. You could tell from the conviction in his eyes, and you can't help but crack a smile through your tears. "Damnit Tetsuro... I was trying to have an emotional moment just now... You sure know how to cheer me up."

Planting a chaste kiss on his lips, and leaning back into his embrace. "Thank you Tetsuro." The blush that takes over his face doesn't go unnoticed. "You're right. I'll thrive in whatever environment I'm put in. After all, it's the students that make the school. Not the other way around, right?"

"Hah~ you're absolutely correct. That's my girl. I'm always so proud of you. Now how about we finish this ice cream before it melts?" You both share a laugh, before going back to eating your ice cream. The coffee long gone cold, but the warmth he brings to your chest makes up for it.

You were so grateful to have him. Though the situation planted a bitter taste in your mouth, to be loved by him left an overpoweringly sweet aftertaste. Being loved by him is reminiscent of the warmth that meets your lips from drinking a good cup of coffee.

*anak, meaning my child

[Here's a little excerpt from the song that I really like! And the translation hehe]

Wag kang mag-alala, maupo ka lang. Pagtitimpla kita. Mahal kape tayo, ang ating paborito. Ang lasang 'di nagbabago, tamis at init ng pag-ibig ko, para sayo

Don't worry, just sit down, and I'll fix you a cup of coffee. My love, let's get some coffee, our favorite. The taste that doesn't change, the sweetness and warmth of my love for you.

HI MY LOVES I kinda went nuts on this one. HWJFKED sort of self indulgent??? Not beta-read btw. Point out whatever mistakes you see. Anw I was inspired by a post by a college applicant who got rejected by UP despite passing the UPCAT bc apparently her school wasn't well known, hence less credible, and had less graduates than public high schools. Ok bye ILY ALL

#kuroo x reader #kuroo fluff #kuroo testuro #haikyuu fluff #kuroo tetsuro x reader #opm #songfic #kuroo #kuroo tetsurou #haikyuu #I miss him #to be loved is to be seen #deartetsuro.📝#deartetsuro.💌

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888bambi · 2 years ago

Text

MY LIVER WILL HANDLE WHAT MY HEART CAN'T - LEE HEESEUNG

✰ a/n: alcohol might give you a headache but it also gives you the best time of your life hehe- anyways be careful when drinking. also, friendly advice, if you go clubbing, GLUE yourself to your friends.

TW for sexual assault/mentions of sexual assault!!!

!heeseung x reader; university au, mentions of hee being a basketball player, reader goes through a lot (mentions of other enha members + le sserafim's chaewon, yunjin and kazuha, aespa's giselle)

genre: fluff, angst/ it's kinda suggestive

warnings: alcohol consumption, and i mean a lot of alcohol, substance abuse, sexual assault kinda? reader gets vary of men after that one encounter, ptsd i guess? let me know if i left anything (lowercase intended) & not proofread (i'll look for any errors when i have time, i am really sorry if there are a lot)

word count: 6424

✰13.03.2023

‘’c’mon chaewon, come with us!’’ four young women together was definitely a lot. when you got into college with your cousin kazuha, you somehow ended sharing an apartment with yunjin, her classmate, and later chaewon joined too, even though she went to a different college. it was like you all were sisters: gossiping again and again, sharing clothes and skin care products, helping each other with work- but the best part came every time your group would go clubbing, on friday.

‘’last time we went clubbing together, kazuha almost stole the bartender’s job, yunjin started screaming and crying, making it seem like i was trying to kidnap her or something, and you vanished. literally. i went to get kazuha and you were nowhere to be seen. worst part, i wasn't even sober myself.’’ chaewon stated, pointing at the three of you, and if eyes could kill, you, yunjin and zuha would all be dead right now.

‘’but that's what makes a night out fun.’’ kazuha said, almost begging her older friend to agree.

‘’kazuha, do i need to remind you about that time when you started talking about politics with a decorative plant?’’ she added, both you and yunjin laughing heavily as kazuha desperately tried to defend herself.

‘’don’t act like you’re the saint.’’ you quickly added, a mischievous grin spreading on your lips, ‘’you make out with everyone in sight when there's even a small drop of alcohol in your system.’’

silence fell over the room as chaewon couldn't seem to find a worthy comeback; somehow, the three of you convinced the oldest girl, and now you were all getting ready.

the dorm was a mess, clothes and makeup products everywhere, music playing from yunjin’s laptop to put you all in the right mood.

two hours and three identity crises later, your group finally left the dorm, headed to the parking lot, where you decided you'd just order a cab to get to the club, since you were all planning to drink later tonight.

as soon as you arrived, you already split up; chaewon met some ‘old friend’ and it was clear she had other plans for the rest of the night, kazuha saw her ballet girls, which was definitely an unexpected crossover, leaving you with yunjin, both you and her heading straight to the bar.

''tequila for the hot girlies.’’ the bartender said, sending you both a wink as he carefully poured you two shots, handing you salt and a slice of lemon, making it easier for you to drink.

one shot turned into two, then three, and now, somehow, you were taking your eighth shot, still going strong; yunjin was now chatting with some guy, and by the way he talked you could tell he was american as well, leaving you all alone at the bar, drinking more and more on your own.

you didn't specifically have any plans for tonight, you just wanted to get wasted. not too long ago, you broke up with your boyfriend of two years, simply because the two of you couldn't handle the distance: going to different colleges in different countries, staying together would have been ‘a waste of time’, according to him. if you had to be honest, his words cut you deep like a knife. did he see the whole thing as a waste of time? nevertheless, you decided that your liver will handle what your heart couldn't, so you were stuck in a club, on your own, taking shot after shot until you’ll eventually go numb.

it wasn't even midnight and you were desperately trying to leave this place; making your way through the dance floor, bodies were moving around you like you were stuck in a freak show; perhaps it was the alcohol that made your anxiety skyrocket, or the fact that you realized you were completely separated from your group, and every face was either blurry or unfamiliar. having this eerie feeling overcoming you, you had to get some fresh air quickly. barely walking straight, it took you all your strength to balance yourself between the dancing people, and get out of the crowd in one piece.

looking around for your friends for one last time, you decided that it was time to go back home, even if the night was still young. you weren't like this, and definitely this feeling wasn't what you wanted. for some reason, the alcohol tonight made you feel confused, stressed and anxious. normally it would make you talkative, energetic and horny. but tonight it didn't happen.

being self conscious of the fact that you’re in such a miserable state, and worse, on your own, you quickly made your way towards the empty hallway, which led to the exit of the club.

the blue lights in the hallway gave you a headache, desperately making you try to adapt your vision to the new lighting and get out of here faster. with every second spent there, your heart rate was only getting faster, making you feel nauseous.

this was a completely new feeling, and it made you wonder if the bartender slipped something in your drinks. given the deplorable state you were in, of course you would never notice if someone messed with your drink. you swear you felt your body rotting with every step you took, feeling the veins in your body, each and every single one of them, the sensation making you want to rip out all your flesh.

‘this never happened before’; you kept telling yourself to stay strong until you made it out; but no matter how many steps you took, it felt like time froze and you were walking in the same spot, again and again.

‘’and what do we have here?’’ your stomach flipped upside down when you heard a voice echoing from behind you, making you stop in your tracks as you tried your best to appear as intimidating and as sober as you could.

the person quickly walked in front of you, leaning down to take a better look at your face in the faint lightning. ‘’what a pretty doll.’’ he happily said, a wide grin spreading on his lips. the man was much older than you, and by the way he looked, he was definitely the highest in the room at the moment.

roughly pinning you to the wall, his action caught you off guard, a gasp leaving your lips as you clenched your teeth during the impact. ‘’i’ve never seen a prettier thing in my entire life.’’ leaning in closer, you felt his hot breath on your face, doing your best to contain yourself. ‘’seems like my prayers were heard. i’m having fun tonight.’’ and with no warning, his dry lips were smashed on yours, pinning you on the wall with his large hands, pushing down on your hips, his knee in between your legs, making sure you couldn't escape.

a tear rolled down your cheek, and that didn't go unnoticed, as he was quick to pull away and lick your salty tears, your body getting overfilled with disgust and fear right away.

you needed an escape, and you needed it now. or else, who knows what might happen, even worse than his disgusting touches. when he kissed you again, a dumb idea crossed your mind; without giving it a second thought, you bit down on his tongue as hard as you could, causing him to yank away suddenly, his eyes widening in shock as he looked back at you.

turning on your heels, you started heading towards the exit in a rush, only to be pulled back by the man, roughly gripping your hair; you forgot you couldn't walk that fast, huh?

‘’fucking bitch!’’ lifting his hand, you shut your eyes in fear, ready to take his hit. you were never hit in your entire life, not even by your parents. right now, you have no idea whether he’ll be satisfied with only a slap, or beat you until you're lying unconscious on the cold floor.

waiting and waiting, you realized his hit never came. no, he was actually silent as well. as you slowly opened your eyes, you saw a tall figure towering over the man, squeezing his wrist tight enough to cause him more pain than you already did. ‘’what the fuck?! who are you?!’’ he yelled, massaging his wrist as he managed to pull away from the tall figure.

‘'doesn't matter.’’ the guy nonchalantly said, putting his hands in his pockets, his back facing you. ‘’you should get lost while i’m still a chill man.’’ he spoke, his voice filled with nothing but nonchalance, speaking in a robotic kind of way.

‘’and who are you to send me away? her man?’’ he snapped back, still keeping his distance.

‘’that doesn't concern you.’’ again, another calm reply, making you wonder if he would still be this collected if he saw what happened earlier in the hallway.

‘’i see, i see.’’ the drunk man laughed, a mischievous grin spreading on his lips as he checked you out once again, ‘’does the bitch bite when she gives head too-’’ he stopped talking when the mystery man dashed towards him, grabbing him by the collar and pushing him up against the wall. oh, how the tables have turned.

‘’what didn't you understand from ‘get lost’, huh?’’ if he was calm earlier, he was definitely terrifying now, and the whole vibe he had changed in a split second. without saying anything anymore, the drunk man quickly apologized, making his way back into the crowd without looking back again.

while his back was still facing you, you quickly wiped away your tears; you didn't even realize you were crying this whole time.

your heart dropped to your knees when you saw who was the one that saved you; lee heeseung. he went to the same college and you saw him in the hallways, but you knew him because of how popular he was as the captain of the basketball team. he had a reputation for his bad temper, so his calm demeanor earlier surely shocked you. ‘’thank you.’’ you whispered, avoiding his eyes.

''don't mention it.’’ he shortly replied, leaning on the wall, hands in his pockets, ‘’was he bothering you for a long time?’’

‘’no-’’ you lied, trying to seem as convincing as you could, ‘’he just came. asked me to leave with him, said no… the typical stuff.’’ you tried to laugh it off, hoping that it was convincing enough for the doe-eyed man, but taking a second look at his face, it was clear he wasn't listening to your bullshit. ‘’anyways, thanks again, have a great night!’’

turning on your feet, this time, you were determined to get away. using all your strength, you managed to run towards the exit without stumbling; you heard heeseung calling after you, but you decided to ignore it for the moment; it was time you went home and calmed yourself down a bit.

the ride back home was silent. luckily enough, the cab driver was an old man, and he was sweet to give you water once he realized you were sick- perhaps he did that so that you won't throw up in his car. anyway, you got back to the dorm on your own, safe and sound.

yunjin, kazuha and chaewon weren't home yet; looking at the clock, it was only two in the morning, so being the party monsters they are, there’s no chance they’ll be home before the sunrise. once you found yourself in the comfort of your house, you quickly took off your clothes, and headed for the shower.

once the cold water hit you, your skin was burning in all the places where that creep touched you. the sad part, this wasn't the first time someone did this to you. no, you had it worse than this, and you were only ten when it first happened.

someone said that trauma never really goes away. that person was right. you might think it goes away, but then something triggers it and bang- memories come back again. memories? was it right to call it a ‘memory’? aren't memories supposed to be pleasant?

that cold shower made you sober real quick, but you knew you'd have a monstrous headache in the morning. hiding yourself under your cozy blankets, all you saw was that grin, every time you close your eyes.

his disgusting scent remained in your nostrils, no matter how hard you washed your face; his devilish grin was imprinted on your retina, and you wanted to wash yourself again, this time with bleach, to make sure you took off his print from your skin.

you didn't sleep that night, and you knew this was simply the beginning of something much worse.

by the time the girls got back, you were awake, watching TV in the living room. you heard them laugh and talk about their night in the club; you couldn't call them ‘bad friends’ since they tried to find you- no, they called you a few times last night. at least they tried to find you.

‘’and what do we have here?’’ yunjin jokingly said as she entered the living room, her way of wording her sentence sending a shiver down your spine.

was your mind fucking with your right now? was it simply a coincidence?

‘’are you okay sweetie?’’ yunjin asked, gently brushing your hair, ‘’you’re quite pale. do you want some water?’’ her worry was evident in her voice, the other two girls turning their attention to you as well.

‘’no, i’m fine! i just couldn't sleep really well since i didn't know where you guys were.’’ a faint smile appeared on your lips, and apparently, that was enough to ease yunjin.

‘’we tried to find you everywhere,’’ chaewon added, jumping on the couch, a loud sigh leaving her lips, ‘’it was like you fell into a rabbit hole or something. you were nowhere to be found.’’

once all four of you were gathered in the living room, they started talking about their night. chaewon hooked up with that old friend of hers, and he apparently asked her out for dinner today, which was cute. kazuha had fun with her ballerina friends, going to three different clubs before coming back home, and yunjin had some fun with jake, another guy from your college, but surprisingly, nothing too wild, which was new for her.

‘’how was your night? of course, other than that you basically vanished again.’’ chaewon asked, their attention turning to you.

you debated for a split second if telling them was worth it; sure, they were your friends, but was it okay to burden them with something so… trivial? what would they say? all he did was kiss you. was it that big of a deal or were you being dramatic.

would they think you are a whore for kissing that man?

they wouldn't, they are your friends- but wouldn't them?

‘’i drank too much and i threw up a bit. i panicked because i couldn't find you so i went home earlier to calm myself down.’’ you felt bad for lying to them, and you felt even worse when you saw how easy they believed you.

maybe it would've been easier if you simply told them.

it’s been a week after that night and you barely slept. not to mention, you barely attended your classes. everything seemed to go downhill. you were falling behind in class, missing a lot of assignments, and simply isolating yourself slowly from everyone and everything.

you told the girls that you weren't feeling that well, saying that ‘you got a cold or something’. but you can't have a cold forever, and you needed to get your life together.

putting on the first hoodie you found in your room, you dressed in a pair of gray sweatpants and left for the starbucks near the corner; you had many problems at the moment, and a vanilla latte wouldn't solve them; but you were still going to get it.

if you saw yourself in the mirror, you would probably cry; were you weak for letting something like this tear you apart? should you tell someone? was it bad that you didn't tell anyone?

pushing the door open to the starbucks, you were happy to see it wasn't as crowded as it usually was; ordering your drink, you patiently waited for it, trying to plan what to do once you get back to the dorm.

''can't believe i run into you here.’’ turning your head in the direction of the voice, your eyes widened when you saw heeseung, now beside you, figuring out that he must be waiting for his drink as well, ''haven't seen you in class all week.’’

‘’we share the same class?’’ you wanted to slap yourself for how dumb you sounded right now; this wasn't like you. for some reason, you couldn't help but wonder if he saw that man touching you before he stepped in. did he actually see? no- if he did he would've stepped in earlier. right?

looking straight into your eyes, he looked slightly amused as he answered your question, ‘’finance?’’

if you were honest, after this week, you even forgot finance was one of your classes, and also forgot he was in that class too. truth be told, you had no idea why the two of you were talking. you never talked before. was he checking up on you after what happened? was he pitying you?

‘’yeah, finance. i remember.’’ you responded, trying to sound as confident as you could.

‘’wow.’’ heeseung added, making you turn your head in his direction again, ‘’never knew you could be so fake.’’ a little smile appeared on your lips, feeling comfortable talking with him. he had quite a reputation for being the best basketball player on campus- and a player in general, although he was rarely seen with girls. actually, he was rejecting girls quite a lot, and he managed to do so even when he was extremely drunk; he was also known for that.

‘’my bad. if you think that’s fake, you should see yunjin.’’ you replied, grabbing your drink, getting ready to leave after you thanked the barista.

‘’i’d rather see you than yunjin.’’ heeseung was quick to reply, not even trying to hide what he just said.

‘’excuse me?’’ you asked visibly confused, stopping in your tracks.

‘’see you on monday, hopefully.’’

somehow, you pulled yourself to got to school on monday, even if you slept seven hours in total during the past days. you kept telling yourself you weren't going there because of heeseung, but the fact that he wanted to see you in class made you feel better after all those days.

perhaps he saw through your little facade- but was he really able to see right through you when even your friends couldn't?

it didn't matter now, you were already seated in class, laptop on the table, ready for the lecture.

you looked around a few times, hoping you would see heeseung, but he was nowhere in sight. turning your attention back on the lecture, you barely paid attention, getting sleepy all of a sudden. at least now you knew that if you wanted to sleep, coming to professor han’s lecture was the answer.

going to your last class for the day, you spotted heeseung walking on the other side of the campus, headphones on as he was wearing his basketball jersey. although he seemed to be in a rush, you really wanted to talk with him, even for a moment.

making your way towards him, you tapped him on his broad shoulders, his expression when he turned around sending a shiver down your spine. as he removed his headphones, his face softened, surprised at the fact that you approached him. ‘’i didn't see you in class.’’

‘’i had practice. finance wasn't that important to me anyways.’’ he replied, switching his backpack from arm to his shoulder, ‘’what a pleasant surprise you finally decided to show up though.’’

rolling your eyes, he laughed at your little action, ‘’putting basketball over finance when finance is mandatory and basketball isn't. not a smart move.’’

laughing at your sentence, he shifted his gaze from your face to your bag. ‘’how many books you got in there?’’ he asked, pointing towards your bag.

‘’none actually. just a notebook and my laptop.’’ you replied, quite confused by his question.

‘’how cool, me too.’’ and so, he took the bag from your hand without any warning, placing it on his other shoulder, ‘’i had to balance my shoulders somehow. now i carry equal weight on both. anyways, where were you headed?’’

‘’i have a seminary. the last one for the day actually.’’

‘’wanna go to starbucks instead? you look like you could really have some coffee right now.’’ he stated, making you self conscious of your dark circles, reminding you of your troubled sleeping schedule.

going with him to the starbucks was definitely better than going to that boring seminary. although you and heeseung barely knew each other, you learnt a lot about him today: he plays a lot of video games, and he likes toy story, as funny as it might sound. he plays basketball at home with his father and older brother, he loves ramen and sleeps a lot. actually, you found out the two of you had a lot in common, even if the two of you led two very different lifestyles: while you were focused on your grades, or at least, this is how you were until that thing shattered you apart, he was more laid back, going with the flow rather than trying to break it.

‘’i know it might be kind of sudden but there’s a party at jake’s frat,’’ heeseung said, instantly making your heart drop when you heard the word party. ‘’i was wondering if you'd like to come around? you can get your friends as well- i mean, jake definitely told yunjin about it. but it’d be nice if you came too.’’

trying to regain your composure, you forced your confidence as much as you could, ‘’why is that?’’ you asked, playing with the straw of your drink.

‘’i genuinely enjoyed your presence. it’s been quite long since i felt so nice around someone who isn't from my friend group. plus, i am not that smart but i can tell you're not feeling your best right now.’’ heeseung was nice, contrary to what others might say. he was, actually, too nice. it was a party held by a frat. you knew some members of this frat. there’s no way there would be freaks like that one in the club, right? even so, how could you deny heeseung when he was giving you those beautiful doe eyes?

‘’i don't really know…’’ you said, tilting your head to the side. if you were going you might as well make him stay with you, in order to avoid another incident like that happening, ‘’when me and my friends drink, we don't really stick together…everyone goes off on their own as if we are doing side quests or something.’’

‘’i’ll stay with you.’’ he quickly said, a chuckle escaping your lips, ‘’i’ll do side quests as well, if that’s what you want. i promise.’’

you don't understand how it was so easy for him to get you to come here; the girls were overly excited once they heard you decided to come as well, and once you told them heeseung was the one who got you to come, they went mad. while chaewon kept asking you about how the two of you started talking, kazuha and yunjin were helping you pick an outfit. were you trying too hard?

the outfit you picked was simple; a long black tube top with a low waisted pair of flare denim jeans, hugging your hips perfectly; everything else was natural, minimal makeup and neat hair. as soon as you stepped inside, you already saw drunk people making out in front of everyone, some even passed out on the floor, broken glasses and so on.

this frat was known for their wild parties, straight out of project x. but they were always fun, and for some reason, no matter how wild they got, the police never got involved.

‘’i’ll go find jake, will you be fine on your own?’’ yunjin asked you, gently brushing your arm. for some reason, which you didn't understand, kazuha and chaewon were coming later, so for the moment, it was just you and her.

‘’yeah, no worries. i’ll go find heeseung.’’ you assured her, feeling her happiness flying through the roof when she heard your response.

being left all alone in the heart of the party, you had a strong feeling of deja vu; how ironic. making your way to the kitchen, you found sunghoon, who was more than pleased to pour you a shot. sunghoon was extremely awkward when he was sober, but after he drank a little, he became friendlier. after letting you know that you can drink as much as you want, he quickly made his way towards his friends, who were playing beer pong at the moment. looking around, you couldn't spot heeseung anywhere. how foolish of you to actually think he would stay with you, someone he barely knew, at a party where he could even get laid if he wanted, considering the amount of hot girls you saw around.

at least the alcohol won't leave you alone when you need it most. drowning all your problems in alcohol was definitively a dumb idea. drinking alone in a place with so many people was even dumber, especially after what happened at the club. did you care? not really. every single problem left your system when you were drunk, and you were willing to let go of everything tonight, even if it meant throwing up everything afterwards.

this time, you didn't stick to only one alcohol, helping you get drunk faster, but also making you dizzier than ever. luckily enough, this time you weren't feeling anxious, nor confused or scared. you genuinely wanted to enjoy yourself tonight, wanting to move on from that incident completely. everything happens for a reason- at least that's what you always told yourself. you should be thankful he didn't do more. it was too much, but it could've been far worse. you’ll never fully move on from it, but you might as well lie to yourself and have a nice time.

after all, you can't go back in time and do things differently. tonight, it was all about feeling good; your heart might not be good with feelings, but your liver surely was a pro at alcohol. drinking away your pain was a hobby at this point.

taking shots with random strangers, drinking different cocktails and drinking raw vodka were the reasons you were now dancing in the middle of everyone with a girl you've never met, drunker than you were, and possibly, high as well. all eyes were on the two of you, and in all that madness you heard that her name was giselle. making friends with random strangers at parties like this one was always wholesome.

swaying your hips to the music, your leg was between hers as the two of you moved in sync, running your hands up and down her waist, spinning her around and so on. you felt the music running through your veins, and you knew there was no way you were going home tonight, not when you were feeling this good.

rolling your eyes back, both you and giselle got even closer to each other, backs touching as you felt the rhythm down to your core. it felt magical, too good to be real. everything was spinning around, and the lights weren't helping either; pitbull’s old songs were, and will always be, a vibe.

everything went smoothly until you felt someone in your close proximity; an unknown guy, with a bottle of soju in his left hand, was now dancing with the two of you, and while giselle was seemingly happy with his arrival, you quickly excused yourself and desperately tried to get away from them. pushing people out of your way, you started getting anxious again. that guy came up to you just because he wanted to do so- which made you realize that what happened at the club two weeks ago, could always happen again. especially when you are alone and vulnerable like this.

where was heeseung, really? why did he ask you to come here, and on top of that, promise you that he’ll stay with you? you were a fool for believing him, and a clown for trying to trick yourself into believing that drinking would make you forget an incident that occurred while you were drunk.

trying to stop your eyes from rolling back, you supported yourself on the wall as you slowly made your way back into the kitchen, pouring yourself a glass of water. you heard a familiar laugh in the distance, not too far from you, making you snap your head in that direction. there he was: lee heeseung. he was wearing baggy jeans and a plain white t-shirt, an oversized leather jacket hanging off his broad shoulders. he looked more attractive than he usually does, his black hair neatly parted in the middle.

he was very attractive indeed. his mannerisms made him even hotter than he already was. you felt something strange in your stomach, and you knew this wasn't because of all that damn alcohol. he suddenly turned his gaze on you, catching you staring at him, making you turn your head away suddenly, feeling the heat going up to your cheeks. ‘’pass me the bottle, would you?’’ you nearly froze when you heard his milky voice behind you, mentally slapping yourself in desperate attempts to get your shit together.

‘’which one,’’ you asked without turning around to face him, ‘’there’s soju, tequila, vodka, some wine, whiskey and lots of beer. what would you like?’’

‘’the one you’re holding,’’ heeseung nonchalantly stated, taking the water bottle from your hands and pouring himself a glass, ‘’i’m driving.’’

you wanted to slap yourself when you realised you were staring at him again, quickly shifting your attention to the tequila bottle in front of you, pouring yourself a shot and taking it down without a second thought.

‘’you surely like drinking a lot, don't you?’’ heeseung asked, leaning back on the counter, scanning your facial features, your heart skipping a beat when you saw his eyes landing on your lips for a brief moment. were you actually going crazy?

‘’my liver will handle what my heart can't.’’ you suddenly confessed, catching him completely off guard, ‘’it’s the best way. no one has to suffer.’’

you could tell he was about to say something, but you weren't in the mood for talking right now. something about the way he looked made him dreamier than he normally was, doing something in your brain. ‘’wanna dance?’’ you confidently asked, taking a few steps towards him, so that your face was inches away from him.

you might as well risk everything. worst case, he rejects you. but you could feel the rising tension between the two of you, and he could surely feel it too. shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly, he pushed himself up from against the counter, towering over you, ‘’lead the way.’’ not only there was a change in his whole behavior, but also in the way he spoke.

without hesitating, you grabbed his hand and dragged him behind you, on the dance floor, pressing your back against his body 'accidentally’, before turning around and putting some distance between the two of you. a smirk appeared on his lips as he looked down at you, fixating his eyes on your lips before slowly scanning you from head to toe. his hands quickly made their way to your waist, pushing you closer, literally pressing your body on his as he gently massaged your waist, dragging his hand lower, daringly putting it inside the back pocket of your jeans.

perhaps you should be ashamed since you were clearly drunk and he was sober, or he should be the one ashamed since he knew you were drunk. it seemed like he read your mind, leaving you for a moment, before returning with two fresh tequila shots, ‘’i thought you were driving?’’ you asked, raising your eyebrow.

‘’i can get a cab and take the car tomorrow, you know?’’ taking the shot together, that wasn't the last one that night.

after taking more shots together, mixing a ‘mystery’ cocktail for him, you found yourself in front of his car as he was desperately searching his pockets for his car keys. once he found them and unlocked the car, you were quick to sit in the backseat, climbing on top of his lap, cupping his face with your fragile hands. his hands were softly caressing your waist, his doe eyes nowhere in sight as he seemed way more confident than he was earlier. you could see his eyes in the dim light, and their whole vibe was changed, making him look like a completely different person.

without holding back, you leaned in and connected your lips to his, moving your lips slowly in sync, his hands squeezing your waist a little bit. breaking the kiss, you saw him pouting at the lack of closure.

this time, before you kissed his lips, you kissed his whole face, leaving lipstick stains everywhere. you couldn't understand what about him was so comfortable and calming, but at the same time mesmerizing yet intimidating. connecting your lips once again, the kiss wasn't soft anymore. biting onto your lower lip, he pushed his tongue into your mouth, a small moan leaving your lips as you slowly moved your hips against him, his hands abruptly going down from your waist to your hips, squeezing them tightly, trying to stop you from moving.

after more kissing and touching, he gently pushed you away, earning a confused look from you. ‘’did i do something?’’ you asked, tilting your head to the side, as you felt your eyelids getting heavy.

‘’i think there’s something we need to talk about first.’’ he seriously said, although his voice was sweet.

‘’hm?’’ you asked, resting your hands on his shoulders, trying to stabilize yourself.

‘’about the night we first met.’’ your eyes widened in shock as soon as his words left his lips, quickly pushing yourself off his lap, trying to open the car’s door, only to be stopped by him. ‘’don’t. calm down a little.’’ your breath was going crazy, and you felt like your heart was going to jump out of your chest.

‘’you saw… that guy-’’ as much as you tried to sound coherent, it didn't work out the way you wanted, trying to read heeseung’s expression while also trying to understand your emotions.

‘’what i saw?’’ he asked, earning a small nod from you, ‘’his tongue bleeding. i didn't need anything else to realise what he did.’’ your eyes started watering at his words.

was he going to see you differently now? was he going to say it was your fault? would he tell anyone else?

heeseung wasn't this type of person.

‘’don’t cry.’’ he gently said, pulling you back on his lap, wrapping his arms around you, ‘’it’s not your fault.’’ his reassuring words were enough to make you break down, wrapping your arms around his neck as you hid your face on his left shoulder. running his hands up and down your back, the two of you stayed in silence for a while; heeseung didn't say anything anymore, letting you cry while he hummed a melody in your ear, trying to calm you down.

‘’i can't thank you enough for saving me that night.’’ you said between sobs, his gaze softening once you pushed yourself away from his shoulder and he saw your reddish eyes in the dim lights, and your mascara running down your cheeks. a faint smile appeared on his lips as he kissed your mascara stained cheeks before he wiped your tears away with his thumb.

‘’you don't have to thank me. any good person would've stepped in.’’ he said, another smile appearing in your face.

‘’still, i’m grateful it was you,’’ the sentence left your lips without you realizing it, making you slap yourself mentally at how bold you were tonight, ‘’i-i mean, we wouldn't be here if you didn't save me that night?’’

‘’actually…’’ heeseung said, shifting his gaze from you to the window, looking at the frat house in the distance, biting his lip before turning his attention back on you, ‘’i wanted to get to know you for a long time. i just didn't have the courage.’’

his confession left you speechless; you never saw yourself worthy of someone like heeseung, someone who was good at everything he did, someone who seemed perfect in all aspects. ‘’you looked kind of untouchable,’’ another shocking confession for the night, ‘’you came to college, went to class and left, no interest in cliches or frats or the typical campus drama. i saw you at a few parties and you were completely different from how you were in school. i found you quite intriguing and i might have developed a small crush on you…so i tried to find the courage to come up to you.’’

you couldn't help but smile like a dumb bimbo at his confession, pressing a soft kiss on his jawline before playing with his necklace, pulling him closer to you, ‘’what a good thing you found the courage to come up to me.’’ you chuckled, leaning in for a kiss, only to be denied by him, which got you more confused.

‘’hold up, hold up,’’ the black haired boy said, removing your hands from his body, ‘’sorry to ruin it to you, but if you keep kissing me i won't be able to hold back anymore.’’

again, he made you confused. was he rejecting you or subtly telling you you're pushing yourself onto him? upon seeing your perplexed expression, the silence was replaced by his loud laugh, squeezing his eyes shut while he laughed in your face. calming down, he barely held back his laughter when he saw the confusion written all over your face.

‘’we can have fun later, sweetheart,’’ heeseung spoke, playing with a strand of your hair, ‘’let me take you out on a date first.’’

(small note: if you ever find yourself in a similar situation and you're afraid to ask for help because you think people will blame your for it, just remember that there's always going to be someone there for you. since i went through something similar and i needed a whole year to tell anyone about it, constantly blaming myself for what happened, i felt much better when i told someone about what happened and got it off my chest. even if it's hard, don't hesitate to seek help <3)

#enhypen #enhypen x y/n #enhypen scenarios #enhypen au #enhypen imagines #enhypen x reader #enhypen x you #enhypen heeseung #lee heeseung #kpop imagines #kpop idol #heeseung #enhypen text messages

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ninimuhllover · 6 months ago

Text

"Tease"

Pairing:Nika mühlx!fem!reader

Request:hi pooks!! if you want tooooo can you do something for mika where reader is an acedemic weapon and mika is infatuated but doesn’t really think reader is gay because she’s so girly and nika always blushy around reader and like paige and kk always tease her??

Warnings:kinda smut?,making out,teasing,fluff,angst kinda,cursing,reader referred to as she,her,hers,no use of y/n,metion of nikas accent

How is she so gorgeous and smart at the same time thought nika while smiling at the girl she hasn't been able to stop thinking about since the first time she met her "girl" Paige said beside from beside me "what?" I said "you down bad" kk said laughing "she's not even gay" I said looking down "why don't you ask" Paige mentioned for the thousand times "no" I said fast "well she's walking over now" I whipped around and she was in front of me "hey guys" she smiled talking to us my mind went dumb as I just stared at her "um Nika about that project you wanna come to my dorm to work on it" she said "huh oh yeah s-sure" I stumble on what to say "okay I send you the room number see ya" she smiled again at me while walking away her perfume sent slowly went away she was wearing a different lip gloss today "yeah look at you!" Paige said while shaking my shoulders while laughing I smile "maybe this will make something happen between you two cause damn" kk said I rolled my eyes while walking out of class to here my phone buzz I open the notifications to see a message from her

Her: room number is 437

Me: thanks

Her: no problem

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚Time skip˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Reader pov

I put the last pillow on my bed when a knock at the door made me turn the music off and I walked to the door and open it seeing Nika on the other side nervously playing with her hands "hey come on in" I say smiling at her closing the door behind her "you can sit wherever" I say to her "she looks around the room while sitting at the door of my bed kinda awkward I hold my laugh at this I sit down by her "what were you think for the project?" I ask her she blushes "idontreallyhaveanyideas" she rushed out "huh" "I don't really have any ideas" she said slower blushing hard "oh well we could do a power point" I say "is that okay with you?" I ask "uh yeah yeah" she said fidgeting and looking anywhere but me "are you okay you seem nervous" I say putting my hand on her knee

Nika pov

Her hand on my knee sent sparks through me "yeah I'm good" I say Shakey "you don't seem like it you want a water" she said getting up "uh sure" I say she walks over to her small fridge to grab me a water bottle I look around her room noticing a small lesbian pin on a bag in the corner"here you go" she said handing me the water and I took a sip of it "thank you" I say feeling a bit better from the interaction with her hand on my knee "I'm gonna grab my bag laptop bag so we can start to work on the project"she said grabbing the bag I was looking at just a second ago sitting on the bed and pulling her laptop out "I like your pins" I say touching the one I had most interest in "oh thanks" she said while typing on her computer "where is your accent from?" She asked I blush a bit "oh I'm Croatian" I say smiling"mm I've always wanted to visit there" she says while smiling at me "yeah you'd probably like it"I say "you really like that pin" she says looking at my hand still touching the pin "oh sorry" I say moving my hand"no your good and yes if you where wondering" she said confused I said"huh" she looked at me"I am a lesbian if you were wondering" she says smiling at me "oh" I say my stomach was doing flips and I was trying to not smile to hard

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚Time skip˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

"no because she had no right to look this fine" she says as we watched the movie on her laptop "for real" I agree with her while looking at the screen when my phone went off to see a message from Paige

Paige: how long y'all gonna be freaky it's 7:45

I look at the message and see she saw it too"i don't know what she's talking about sorry" I say fast trying to put my phone down fast while looking at her. Her face flushed red "it's okay" she laughed kinda nervously "she's just talking I swear-" I was caught off by her lips touching mine and her hands on both sides of my face I felt like I was floating my hand went to her hip and my other on her neck the kiss getting heated she climbed on top of my lap sitting down while not breaking the kiss my hand moved down to her hip her hand now on my shoulders she pulled away and started to kiss down my jaw I let out a breathy moan as she kissed behind my ear "your so pretty baby" she said while kissing my neck I grabbed her face and pulled her back to my lips "your such a 𝙏𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚" I say with her lips on mine while she smiles she pulled away "I've wanted to ask for a while but will you be my girlfriend" she said "yes" I said kissing her again when my phone started to ring I pulled away reluctantly and answered

"hello"I say into the phone breathlessly

"hey I was just making sure you were still alive but it looks like I was right on the freaky part" I hear Paige say on the phone

"oh shut up" I say when she starts to laugh I hang up after saying I was okay and look back at her "hey is it okay if I stay" I ask nervously "yeah if course" she says while cuddling up to my chest I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her on the top of her head I soon hear small snores coming from her I close my eyes and fall asleep

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚Time skip˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

I walk into the gym with my bag on my arm and kk comes running up while jumping "yeah okay girlypop I see you" I blush knowing what she's talking about "shush" I say "is that what she told you last night" Paige said from beside her "maybe maybe not" I say confidently "oh okay so boom tell me what happened now" kk said laughing "nuh uh that's my information" I say while walking to the locker room "oh so that's how it is" she says while walking with me and all three of us walk into the locker room "yep that's how it is" I say laughing

﹒⪩⪨﹒

Kinda short but I loved this idea @julienbakerloverr pooks I hope this was good sorry it took a while though I didn't know how to start it but anyways ignore spelling mistakes and punctuation I hope you enjoyed it and please please request please don't copy me my work with out asking 🩷🤍

#nika muhl #nika muhl x reader #nika mühl smut #seattle storm #uconn women’s basketball #wnba basketball #wnba

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markantonys · 9 months ago

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ohmigosh, your sims are all adorable!! and i love their stories so much :) i used to lovingly tolerate 3 bc i had a pretty low-spec computer so it was very laggy, but now i have an actual gaming laptop and 3 isn't compatible anymore, so i play 4 all the time. i've also got a ton of mods (99% clothing and hair bc i'm addicted to dressing my sims up), including the ones you mentioned - they're such a big help when it comes to gameplay, i love them <3

please don't worry about infodumping, it's so cool to meet another sims fan!!

thank you!! <33 haha yeah i remember sims 3 was SO laggy and took like 20 minutes for me to boot up every time, i still have a subconscious mindset of "okay, once i load up sims i can't exit out of the game until i'm fully 100% done playing for the day because it's not worth trying to load it twice in one day" even though 4 only takes a couple minutes to load. and i totally feel you, dressing my sims up is one of my top favorite parts of the game, and there's so much amazing cc out there!

oh, i just realised i forgot to answer your question: i'm an aging on simmer, but i think i might turn it off bc i too prefer just starting up new households rather than going through generations. i am very much an autonomy off girlie, though; i tried leaving it on, but the control freak in me likes micromanagement too much 😅 this is my last one, i promise: can you tell me if having autonomy on makes storytelling more interesting? i pick a bunch of traits that should make my sims more/less compatible, but for some reason they don't react to things the way i want them to (then again some of the traits are modded ones rather than base game ones so that might be partly the reason, they don't always seem to have an effect on sim behaviour)

you should give aging off a shot to see how you like it! i like my current system of having aging off in one save file and aging on in a different one so i can have it both ways and do my legacy challenge properly without messing with my rotational freeplay households. when i have aging off i do still age up my sims using a birthday cake, but i just do it whenever i feel like they're ready for the next life stage rather than the game having a set day that's their birthday. so it can get kinda weird if my sim is going to high school with the same teens her mom went to high school with because i aged their household up manually but everyone else is immortal djkfg but i don't usually last more than 2 generations in a single family so for me it's not much of an issue!

and i SO know what you mean about liking micromanagement too much haha i definitely still micromanage my sims even with autonomy on! so in that respect it can be challenging if you're constantly trying to stop them from doing things you don't want them to do. i like it especially for large households because if i can't keep track of everybody, having autonomy on will make them eat on their own when they get hungry etc whereas i believe if it's off they'll just die unless i specifically tell them to eat. as for whether it makes storytelling more interesting, yes and no, i also feel like traits don't have a huge effect on storytelling and autonomy on doesn't really change that too much, i don't think (besides a couple, like goofball sims keep trying to prank toilets with autonomy on, romantic sims are more likely to autonomously flirt, and i'm guessing mean or evil sims would keep being autonomously mean, but i never make mean or evil sims because i'm too soft haha).

i think social interactions are the area where autonomy on most spices up gameplay because your sim might randomly flirt with or be mean to someone you didn't expect them to (especially if they're in certain moods, being in a flirty mood makes them extra likely to autonomously flirt with someone and being in an angry mood makes them extra likely to autonomously be mean). this can be a fun way to throw in some curveballs, or it can also be infuriating if your sim decides to flirt with some rando right in front of their spouse and now the whole marriage is in shambles djkfg i would say if you're thinking of testing out autonomy on, maybe give it a go with a 1-2 sim household to start so that you can get a sense for what autonomy on is like, but it's a small enough household that it's easy to keep an eye on everybody and prevent them from going too off the rails!

#fidelias #answered

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robinofgothamcity · 3 years ago

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me estoy enamorando de ti

characters: edward nashton / the ridder

pronouns used: she/her

note: not checked for grammar or spelling mistakes / i'd really love to hear back from my AEW girlies on which wrestlers you'd like me to write for !! :) this had no reason to be as long as it did but minus whale this could have a part two if any of you would be interested in it

"gotham just sucks," you told your friend over the phone as you chewed down on your food, "it'd be nice to just be able to walk in the city at night and not feel like you're gonna get stabbed, shot, or hit. you know there's a rumor going around that there's people stabbing women at our universities parking lot at night? I'd like to feel safe walking at my own damn school ya know!"

edward sat in silence but taking in the conversation you were having. you were drinking a coffee and looking down at your books. from what edward could tell you were somewhere in the Communication department. you had several books on the subject. Communication in Health. how to communicate in non-violent ways, the book titles went on.

"and it's not like we can move out of the city. the rent is far too high anywhere else! have you seen what the prices are for even a studio apartment in Metropolis? it's like what a three bedroom would cost you here. Central City is okay but still more than Gotham," you continued, "but I'll talk to you later. I gotta study considering Graduation is in a few days and need to order another coffee while i'm at it."

you waved down the waitress, asking for another coffee and a dessert. you weren't too picky on what you got served; however, you saw her talking to the man on the barstool and asked him what he had. you tended to come to this diner a lot and although you never knew his name, you knew he ordered a pumpkin pie every time he was here.

you moved your things to the bar top, a few seats down from the man and gave him a small smile. he returned an awkward wave and looked back down to his pie. you thanked the waitress for the refill and pie before going back to your work. you were staring at your laptop screen, biting down on your gel nails in thought.

from what edward heard, you were in college so still on the younger side but you were about to graduate so not that young. you rubbed your eyes as they tingled in slight pain. you had been staring at the screen for too long he assumed. you gave your hair a run through with your fingers and drank some of your coffee before staring around the diner in procrastination.

"hey, i'm ( your name )," you turned to him. Edward looked up, not knowing if you were speaking to him or not. you nodded and smiled, "I'm edward," he replied quietly, tapping his pencil nervously, "you in college too? I always see you in here doing work so I can imagine you're in it like me."

edward shook his head, "no, I've been out for a long time now. I can imagine I was graduated when you entered," he replied. you waved him off, "you don't look like you're much older than I am! what do you do? i'm a Communication major and yes I've heard everything under the sun about it so I don't need the lecture," you said. "oh, I'm a forensic accountant," you nodded, "that's cool. so do you see dead bodies and stuff?" before edward could reply, the tv began to run last nights news segment on The Riddlers newest stream. you looked up to the tv, rolling your eyes a bit tiredly.

"I mean, I understand why he's doing it because I'm just as sick at Gotham as he is but I don't think I could ever kill someone you know?" you murmured off handedly. edward didn't mutter a word wondering where you were going with this, "it's whatever, right? guess Gotham has to gonna learn some how," you added on before looking back at edward, "plus, the whole Bruce Wayne thing is true to some extent like it's sad he lost his family but he's rich, he's not suffering like us mere mortals"

"did you grow up in an orphanage too?" edward finally asked. you shook your head no, "my mom was a single parent. she had to support four of us on her own and the pay wasn't great. her boss constantly stole checks from all of their employee's so sometimes we had to scrape from the barrel to get food. it wasn't until we were all old enough to have jobs to actually live decently."

edward nodded sympathetically, "I gotta go, I have class in the morning and I won't want to wake up if I stay any later," you gave edward one final smile before collecting your things and leaving.

you noticed through Twitter that The Riddler was going to go live soon. you had no idea that so many people were anticipating it this much. you heard stories from your friends who had watched them before about how cruel they could get. live execution wasn't uncommon and you didn't know how'd you feel if you witnessed a Gotham styled liveleak video happen in real time.

you gulped, biting the bullet and going to the website that had been shared to watch the stream from. you quickly made a username, not thinking much of what to call yourself before getting the question mark on your screen. you had no idea if this was going to bug your phone but you needed to see what the hype was about. you just hoped that you weren't about to witness a murder for your first time.

grabbing the coffee you were drinking, the stream popped up and a live close up of The Riddler started it off. you looked at your phone intensely as he went on and on about how he was going to start going for filthy employers who snaked their employees of their hard earned money. you gripped the mug as your eyes widened.

"no fucking way," you whispered seeing your mothers old boss sitting on a broken chair crying and screaming. you instantly grabbed your ipad and called your sister through video, "are you watching The Riddlers stream?" you screamed into the phone, "no, what the hell? why would I be?" she asked back. "he's going after Gotham factory ceo's now and you'll never guess who he has hostage!" you exclaimed shoving your phone to the camera.

your sisters eyes widened, not believing it either. she screamed for your mom who was in your homes kitchen and showed her what you were showing them, "is that Sanchez?" she asked hysterically screaming, "guess the bastard is getting what he needs," you murmured. your mom shook her head in disbelief, "he was a piece of crap but I don't think he needs to die from it," you gave her a look, "he made our life hell! do you remember the amount of times we had to sit in the cold with no electricity because you couldn't pay the bill when he stole that weeks check? shit, one less piece of shit in Gotham, am I right?"

your sister remained silent as your mom prayed silently before walking away. the two of you watched as your moms old boss cried out two wrong answers as The Riddler sang about how he had one more chance to get his riddle right before he got executed.

"maybe this can be a lesson to those who make innocent families suffer," The Riddler yelled into the camera, "I hope you have the day you deserve," he whispered into the other mans ear before grabbing his detonator remote and teasing the boss with it. you looked at your sister who gave you a look of acknowledgement. you put your phone face down on the table as a blast went off. you knew what he had done but you were in no mood to see it happen.

once you felt like it was safe to watch again, you noticed the comments going crazy. you had waved to your sister goodbye and fully immersing yourself into the stream again. your fingers hovered over the comment section, not knowing if you wanted to leave a comment or not.

"nice job going after this scum Riddler <3. this was a relief for many."

you quickly pressed send before leaving the chat and exiting the stream. you grabbed your bag and packed your school things before going to the diner to get dinner and work on some homework. the diner was practically empty with waitresses and the regulars sitting in their usual seats.

"an american with a coke, thanks Brandy," you told her as she put the order on the white paper and stuck it on a string so the cooks could see. you put your books on the bar top and watched the news going into a frenzy over The Riddlers latest stream. you knew they were going to exaggerate it like crazy, "that crazy bastard. since when was vigilantism suddenly become okay?" Brandy asked rhetorically. you shrugged, "it became okay when fuckers like that decided to punish innocent families into poverty for no reason."

you bit down on your burger and popped your headphones in as you got to working on your school assignments. you were tapping your tablet pen in concentration when you heard the bell of the door ring. you looked up to see it was edward walking in. you waved at him excitedly as he took a seat one over from yours.

"you're here later than usual, did you catch the news tonight?" you asked. edward knew to play it dumb and shook his head no, "you know how I was telling you about my moms dumb boss? he got executed tonight by The Riddler, isn't that ironic?" you exclaimed. brandy scoffed at the way you were explaining everything excitedly, "she thinks The Riddler is insane but come on, it's like he had it coming!"

"that is ironic. at least he won't put another family through that again," edward murmured. you nodded, taking a sip of your soda, "working on your accounting again?" you asked peering over to see the plethora of numbers on the sheets. he nodded, "I wish I was smart in math but I barely passed my gen ed math course my freshman year," you said, "the world just granted me great writing skills I guess."

"writing is just as great as math. it takes a lot for someone to write something interesting and I bet you're great at it," he confessed. you smiled fondly, "say edward, want to go out for brunch tomorrow? you can pick me up from my dorm around 11:00," you finally asked him.

edward was completely taken back. he had NEVER gotten asked out on a date before and it was never from girls as cute as you. you slid him the address of where your dorms were at along with your number and paid Brandy before leaving. you had left your stupid purple sparkly pen behind and edward immediately pocketed it.

edward put the napkin of where you left your information on into his coat jacket and left, not bothering to leave a tip this time around.

you woke up around ten in the morning and realized you only had an hour if edward decided to pull through on the date you had asked him out on. you put on your favorite pink sweater and black leggings before slipping on the same colored crocs of your hoodie. you knew it was pretty casual but edward didn't seem like fashionable type.

"where ya headed so early in the morning?" your roommates asked. you knew it was pointless to lie, "hopefully to a brunch date, why?" you asked. they all stared at you in shock, "a date? with who? you don't talk to anyone...ever," one of them exclaimed.

"he's graduated," you answered, "he's a forensic accountant for KTMJ so yeah, I don't think you'd know him." just as you were about to head to the door, you heard a knock on the door, "is it him?" they asked. you opened the door to see edward standing there awkwardly.

"hey edward! ready to go?" you asked. he nodded, wiping his hands nervously on his khaki's, "these are my roommates. roommates, this is edward," they all stared at edward in confusion. he was very much not in college anymore and didn't seem like the guys you'd usually go for, "what?" you asked them, seeing the looks they were giving edward, "nothing!" one roommate said, "just not someone we'd see you with," another said.

you could sense that edward was taking what they were saying to heart, "fuck off, that's why your boyfriend cheated on you and you can't find a stable relationship," you spat before leaving. your roommates, as much as they hated what you had said, knew you had a point.

"I was thinking this place by Gotham University. it's usually pretty dead around this time and kind of cheap," you giggled. edward agreed as he opened the door to his crappy car. you thanked him and buckled yourself in as edward started his car and went the way you told him.

the restaurant wasn't far but he could sense it was a very college populated place. they had jerseys from Gotham University hanging and even stupid portraits of dumb people who won ridiculous drinking challenges. as edward pulled into the parking lot, you immediately rolled your eyes at who was walking out.

"why is nelson here," you muttered to yourself, "what was that?" he asked. you shook your head, "nothing. just some stupid guy I was seeing for a while. lets go in before he recognizes I'm here." the two of you walked through the side entrance and sat at a two person table.

"thanks for coming out today, I can't remember the last time I went on a date," you said. edward smiled, "you're telling me. this is the first one I've ever been on," your eyes widened in surprise, "well, it's a pleasure to be your first," you whispered jokingly.

you stared at the plethora of photos on edwards wall. you had finally connected the dots that edward was The Riddler. he had confessed it to you one night after he came to your place bloody and hardly able to breathe.

"baby, you're not playing some elaborate joke right?" you asked. edward shook his head no as you went to grab a random paper that was on his wall, "this is a run on sentence babe," you heard edward life, "of course that's what you noticed. grammar mistakes don't pass by you, do they?"

you fixed your glasses and saw the lists of edwards next victims. police officers, government officials, and even the dean of your university, "what does laurence have to do with anything?" you asked him. edward gave you the file he had on him. you read over it quickly and realized that almost all tuition that all of you were paying the school was not going to any of the departments. it was going straight to a wired bank account that he had in secret.

"that stupid bastard," you whispered. edward held you close to him as he told you what the plans of execution were for him. the innocent mind you once had was long gone. although you refused to watch any execution edward did, you did know when they were going to happen and how. you had to admit it but you helped him prep a few of the streams when he was getting overworked.

"you're doing this tonight?" you asked. edward nodded, "can't wait any longer," he replied. you turned to look at edward and placed a kiss on his lips, "be careful. I don't need you getting hurt again and if it's any help, he's usually in his office Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays until eight."

edward sighed contently, "you're heaven sent, sweetheart," he whispered in your ear. you smiled, putting your hands on his face, "I know darling, who else would be willing to go through your murder plans if not me?" you asked jokingly.

your hands went to edwards soft brown hair, running through it and pulling apart the tiny knots he had. edward did not want any of this to end but he knew he had to attend to his evening plans before he was late and wounded up in some unnecessary predicament. he let you kiss him once more before officially placing one last kiss on your forehead before leaving.

you knew that if edward ever got caught, you'd be going down with him. you were an accessory to several murders by now and that was something that Gotham Police would send you to Arkham for. even more so, you knew how disappointed your family would be about everything. they had no idea of the double life you were leading and how deep you were into it.

you pulled on one of edward's shirts and shorts of your own before pulling up the stream. edward knew your username by heart and got excited that you took time out of your day to watch it. once the stream began, you knew he was going to go on about Batman and how he'd see him in hell which you figured out would be Arkham.

as edward grabbed his weapon of choice for tonights execution, you put the phone down, not wanting to witness him actually kill him. edward never understood why you hated seeing it happen but helped with the plans beforehand. it was a weird ick he noticed you had but it was something he was never going to ask you about.

you stood in front of the Arkham picturing station, waiting as they set up the camera to take your mugshot. you had gotten caught by Gotham Police with edward. all of the waitresses were dumbfounded that the two of you were basically the reason why Gotham was even worse than it usually was.

you were wearing the infamous first date pastel pink sweater that matched your crocs and glasses. you looked at the camera, giving it an annoyed but tiny smile as they took the pictures. you could see the headlines covering you and edward from the tiny tv on the desk.

"The Riddler and (username) finally in GCPD custody."

your rolled your eyes at the fact that they used the stupid username you had given yourself for the streams as the headlining name. you would have preferred they called you by your real name but as they shoved the both of you into a cell, you were no longer able to read the headlines anymore. your mugshots were shown on TV as you stared at edward and shrugged.

"they could be worse," you joked making edward chuckle, "you're right darling, you look wonderful," he whispered. you shoved him playfully as he sat you on his lap, "I wonder how much time we have left together before they separate us," edward murmured as the two of you watched the news segment on yourself.

they showed pictures of your 'regular' life, wondering how you were able to go from a simple college student to a full fledged 'villain' as they called it. edward knew that they were playing it safe with you because as soon as they got to him, they were tearing him into shreds. they were almost sympathizing about how your life got turned upside down by this Riddler.

"beautiful woman ya got there," the two of you heard a voice from another cell say. you turned to edward as he went towards the door, "thanks pal but she's not available," he replied. the man laughed, an insane laugh you had never heard before, "I ain't takin' her from ya but I do have eyes," he said.

edward held you close as you had approached the door yourself, "nice to meet you," you whispered to the mystery man. he chuckled once more, "pleasure is all mine," was all he said before laying back down. you gave edward a confused look before deciding you had enough for one night and went to the top bunk of the bed.

#dc x reader #dc #dc imagine #dc comics #edward nashton #edward nashton x reader #edward nashton imagine #the riddler #the riddler imagine #the riddler x reader #edward nygma

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jadequeen88 · 4 years ago

Text

Incel Tomura

I couldn’t think of a good title for this, so... I just went with something real blunt. Anyway, this was inspired by a friend and how she actually met her IRL boyfriend.

PAIRING: Incel!Shigaraki x egirl!reader

TW: face sitting, degradation, mommy kink, reader basically bullying Tomura (he deserves it)

3.2k~

AS ALWAYS MY FICS ARE STRICTLY 18+

“TCH!”

Tomura scoffed at the screen of his laptop. The Discord server he helped admin had gone to shit since he let that idiot Dabi loosen the requirements to join. It was one thing when Toga joined. He knew she was a decent gamer. But you? With those stereotypical cat-ear headsets, perfectly done make-up and short skirts? Please… He saw right through you. Just another fake ~uwu~ e-girl trying to pretend they knew what they were talking about.

It didn’t end with you being annoyingly informed in the gaming chat, either. You were always in the anime and manga chats, too… Suggesting different ones that there’s no way you actually enjoyed.

But the WORST part of you being in the server? Spamming the picture chat with selfies and outfit pics. No, it wasn’t against the guidelines and yes, you got lots of compliments (of course, you were clearly hot), but it made Tomura livid. Where there used to be pics of half-built PCs and screenshots of character upgrades, now there were endless pictures meant to tease and bait the guys in the server.

Today’s picture is what sent him completely over the edge. Your hair was put up in two messy space buns, signature pink cat-eared headset perched on your head. Your black, mesh top was straining against your tight, hot pink bra, barely hiding your cleavage and your slender neck was adorned with a chunky, black collar with a large, silver ring hanging from the front. The icing on the cake, though… the thing that broke him, was the face you were making. Eyes crossed, little pink tongue lolling past your perfect hot-pink lips, it was an obvious ahegao face. The caption read:

“New collar! Thank you for da gift @XxXknifey_wifeyXxX”

Followed by a bunch of annoying ass emojis.

Tomura shifted in his gaming chair, his growing bulge making his sweats tight. He gritted his teeth and opened his DMs…

******

You snickered as you opened your text chat with Dabi. Poor Tomura… He had no clue his friend was an old high school buddy of yours and sent screenshots every single time he bitched about your presence on the server. At first, it was just a couple of snide comments, but you quickly decided to turn it into a game. You’d add more emojis than you normally would, flirt shamelessly with Toga in the chat, and be very vocal with your opinions. Then it progressed with more and more selfies, pics showing off your new skirts, and pics of your pink, girly gaming setup. Today you pushed it with the ahegao face, you’ll admit. It was pretty out of character for you, but you couldn’t wait to hear about Tomura’s reaction from Dabi.

It was everything you hoped it would be:

Decay_666_

So can we give those bitches their own chat or what? Seriously, I’m sick of seeing their shit everywhere. Did you see her ahegao face selfie? This server was supposed to be for ACTUAL gamers, not fake e-girl sluts spamming the chat with their bullshit…

Cremation_Daddy

Lol, damn dude, calm down… we can make a separate chat. You’re the only one on the server complaining. Y/N really fucking you up that bad?

Decay_666_

Oh, fuck off… she’s just being an attention whore and it’s getting on my nerves.

Cremation_Daddy

Yeah, whatever you say. Prolly jerkin it to that selfie right now

You didn’t know why, but you kinda had a crush on the skinny loser. Knowing how worked up he’d get over the smallest things you did thrilled you. You wanted to know just how badly you affected him and today was the day you’d find out.

*****

Tomura heard a ping from his monitor alerting him to a new DM. expecting it to be Dabi giving him more shit, he scowled and clicked over to his Discord tab. When he saw that it was you DMing him, it was like someone had poured a bucket of ice water over his head. He could barely type he was so nervous.

Y/N

Hey :)

Decay_666_

Y/N

How did you like my new collar?

Tomura panicked. Had Dabi said something? There’s no way he’d do that. How did he even respond to that? He decided to feign ignorance.

Decay_666_

What collar?

Y/N

*image*

He audibly gasped. You sent him the selfie you’d posted in the chat earlier. Somehow, it was even hotter than the first time he’d seen it. Probably because you had sent it to him. You wanted to make sure he saw it. The thought alone made him painfully hard. He typed out a shaky response:

Decay_666_

Yeah… you look really pretty :)

He grimaced. He couldn’t think of anything clever when he was put on the spot like that. Plus, how long had it been since he’d spoken to a girl one on one? Much less a hot one? Never. That’s when.

Y/N

Aww, you’re so sweet :) wanna see it in person?

Now Tomura was wondering if he’d died and gone to heaven. Did she want to meet up? Wearing that fucking collar? There’s no way… He stared at the screen for a good ten minutes before another ping brought him back to reality.

Y/N

I’m free now if you are. Plus, there’s a new episode of *insert favorite anime* out and I didn’t wanna watch it alone.

Decay_666_

Yeah. Sure.

His response was almost uninterested but inside he was panicking. When was the last time he showered? How much time did he have to get ready? Did he even have any clean clothes? He leaped from his chair and ran to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Another ping rang out and he raced to check his DMs to see that you’d sent your address. To his surprise, you only lived a short walk from him. Another jolt of excitement shot through his spine as he quickly responded.

Decay_666_

Be over in 30 :)

He turned on the shower then started picking through his pile of clothes finding the ones that smelled the least offensive. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been this nervous and excited at the same time.

*****

Tomura shifted from one foot to the other, nervously scratching at the side of his neck. He caught himself before the skin there broke and he ended up having to deal with a bloody neck on top of already being a nervous wreck. He’d only been standing outside your apartment for a minute or two, but it felt like an eternity. He kept checking his phone to distract himself. Just as he was starting to question if this had been a good idea, the door flung open.

His eyes widened and his mouth turned into a thin line. You answered the door in a fucking towel. He began opening and closing his mouth like a fish that had been plucked from the water. You giggled innocently like it was perfectly normal to answer the door nearly naked.

“You’re here a little earlier than I expected! I just got out of the shower. Come on in,” you moved to the side to give him room to walk through the door into your small apartment. You were sure to not move completely out of the way so he’d have to almost brush against your chest. You could feel him stiffen and hold his breath as he passed by.

This was going to be so much fun…

*****

Tomura’s dick had been painfully hard the moment he’d seen you in that towel. Luckily, when you’d gone into your bedroom to get dressed, he was able to position it in his waistband so he wouldn’t be pitching a tent in front of you. The thought of you noticing him popping a boner just by looking at you in a towel was mortifying.

However, what you decided to change into didn’t help his situation. Your baby pink terry cloth shorts would have shown the curve of your ass had it not been for the little row of ruffles around the bottom. Your tank top, the same baby pink color as your shorts, was pulled tight across your chest (holy shit, were you not wearing a bra?!). A fleeting glance at your chest proved to Tomura that you definitely were not wearing a bra.

“You can come on back,” you beckoned from the doorway of your bedroom, “I thought we’d be more comfortable in here…”

He gulped and rubbed his sweaty palms on his jeans before nodding and rising to walk towards you. Your room was foreign to him. Decorated with all shades of pink and purple, soft, plush bedding, and a soft pink glow emanated from the LED strip lights that lined the walls. Tomura stood awkwardly, looking around for a chair to sit in when you flopped onto your bed and began pulling up the streaming app on your tv.

You looked up at him sweetly and patted the spot on the plush comforter next to you. “Come sit, Tomu! You don’t have to stand way over there. I don’t stink, ya know,” the wink you gave him made his knees buckle.

“Umm,” he chuckled nervously, “No, of course not. You, uhh… you smell…”

No, you were way too close. This was bad. There’s no way he would be able to string together a coherent thought, much less hold an actual conversation with you. You pout and lean in even closer to him.

“Tomuuuuu!” fuck, he hated that he loved that stupid nickname, “You think I smell?!”

“What?! N-no, not at all. I was trying to say that-”

Before he could finish his sentence, you tilted your head to the side offering up your neck for him to smell and he swears his eyes crossed as he tried to absorb what was happening.

“I even wore my new perfume! Go on, smell. Tell me what you think,” you smirk looking out of the corner of your eye.

Fuck.

You were teasing him, he knew you were, but his dick was so hard that he was completely at your mercy. He leaned in to take a tentative sniff and his eyes wandered lower. His breath hitched when he noticed the outline of your hardened nipples peeking through the thin material of your tank top. Before he knew what was happening, you turned your face forward and put your mouth next to his ear.

“Are you looking down my shirt, you pervert?” you purred. Tomura made some sort of incoherent noise and pulled away.

You laughed and pushed his shoulder playfully, “Geeze, I’m just kidding! You’re wound so tight.” you pause making a thoughtful face.

“Oh, I know how to help! Come on, over here,” you pulled him between your spread thighs and proceeded to rub his shoulders, working out all of the knots in his lean back.

After a few seconds, Tomura began to relax into your touch, slumping slightly and letting out a tiny sigh. He was deathly still the entire time you massaged him. He was terrified if he moved too much that his raging boner would free itself from his waistband. When your hands left his shoulders, he started to move away just to be pulled back into your lap. His head landed in your cleavage as your hands trailed down his chest.

“Hmm, so tense, Tomu,” you whispered into the crown of his hair, “Is my massage not working?”

He wanted to yell that of course he was tensed up. That his dick is the hardest it’s ever been in his life and if he doesn’t hold as still as possible, he’s scared he might start humping the air like a pathetic dog. Before he can answer, your hand trails down to the waistband of his jeans, and he freezes. The tips of your fingers brush across his leaking tip and Tomura lets out a low, needy moan before he can stop himself.

“Just what I thought,” you purred as you began to trail your fingers up and down the hard bulge in his jeans, “Pathetic. Look at you, so fucking hard for me. And all I did was rub your shoulders.” He wanted to defend himself, but all he could do was whine as his eyes rolled in the back of his head while you continued touching him through his jeans.

“And to think, I never thought you’d want anything to do with some fake bimbo like me. Because I only game and watch anime for attention, right?” you squeeze his cock through his jeans, causing him to yelp. “Well? What do you have to say for yourself, incel? Wanna tell me why your dick is this hard for me if I’m so annoying to you?”

The realization that Dabi had told you everything flitted through the back of his mind, but he didn’t have room in his brain right then to be mad at him. He had to do whatever he needed to do to keep you touching him.

“I, ahh... I’m s-sorry,” he stuttered pathetically. The front of his jeans was wet from your teasing and the denim was rubbing him raw through his thin boxers, “D-didn’t, fuck, didn’t mean it like… ahh, l-like th-that.”

You loved how easily you could wreck him. You pet his hair back from his sweaty brow as you cooed at him lovingly.

“You know,” you removed your hand from the front of his jeans and he whined from the lack of friction, “You really hurt my feelings, baby. I thought you were so cool and the whole time, behind my back, you said just mean things about me.”

He sat up and turned to face you. His pathetic, needy gaze shot straight to your core. The power you held made you drunk and you desperately wanted more.

“No, no no no…” he grabbed your hands and you realized how clammy they were, “I’m-I’m so sorry. Please! Please…”

“Hmm,” you studied him for a moment, “Well… There might be a way you could make me feel a little better.” you tucked a strand of hair behind his ear, “You were so mean to me.”

“Anything! Please! I-I’ll do anything for you!” desperation started creeping in, thinking you’d leave him hanging with no relief. Little did he know, you had no intention of letting him go any time soon. Your plush lips curled into a devious smile. A soft hand reached up cupping his jaw.

“What a good boy, Tomu,” a tremor passed through his body. You reached over to your nightstand and pulled out the collar you’d taken the selfie in.

“You know,” the collar danced between your painted nails, “This also came with a leash. I was thinking,” your lust-filled eyes meet his, “If you wanted to be a good boy for me… You’d let me see how pretty it looks around your neck.”

Tomura hesitated, his eyes rapidly moving between your eyes and the collar you held. After a moment of consideration, he nodded. You giggled and clapped your hands together excitedly leaping off the bed. You returned with a short, chain-link leash.

“Now,” you leaned in and fastened the collar around his neck. Your bodies were centimeters apart and Tomura thought he might pass out, “When you’re wearing your collar, you don’t call me Y/N,” you nudge his ear with your nose and whisper, “You call me ‘Mommy.’ Do you understand?” you feel him nod against your face.

“That’s not how good boys answer their Mommy. When you answer me, you say, ‘Yes Mommy’ or ‘No Mommy.’ Is that clear?”

“Y-yes… Mommy.”

“Mmm, what a good boy,” you placed a soft kiss on his neck and he let out the most delicious whimper. You hooked a finger through the ring on the front of the collar, “You’re gonna go sit in Mommy’s gaming chair and let her use you as a toy. Okay?”

Tomura’s head was spinning and he almost couldn’t answer until you jerked him by his collar, “Y-yes, Mommy. Please, please make me your toy.”

You stood and dragged him over to your chair and made him sit, “What a polite boy you are! Saying ‘please’ without being asked. If you keep that up, you just might get a reward,” his belt buckle rattled as you worked his jeans down his narrow hips.

A ragged breath escaped his chapped lips as you removed your tiny shorts revealing a black, lace thong. You straddled his lap, your dripping slit hovering a centimeter over the angry, leaking head of his cock. His hands shook as you placed them on your hips and slowly moved your thong to the side. Descending an inch at a time, only teasing his tip, was causing him to come undone underneath you.

“You’re already so close and I’ve only put the tip in. You better be a good boy and not come until I tell you to or you’re going to be punished,” you pushed another couple of inches inside and he nearly wept.

“I-I’m trying, M-mommy! I wanna be a good boy!”

“Mmm, I know, baby. You’re doing so,” another inch, “So…” and another, “Well.” you were fully seated on his cock now. Tomura knew he wouldn’t last. Your velvet walls were sucking him down harder than anything ever had before. It made his fleshlight feel like it was made of sandpaper. You had ruined him for anything else.

With a few rolls of your hips and some high, airy moans, he was about to bust. “Mommy! Mommy, please! I-I’m g-gonna…”

“Tomu,” your voice was authoritative now, “If you come in Mommy’s pussy, I’m going to make you clean it out with your tongue then I’m going to sit on your face until I come as many times as I want.” your hand wrapped around his throat and you started bouncing on his cock. Your filthy words and aggressive motions catapulted him into an orgasm.

“You bad, BAD boy,” a smack to his cheek broke off his moans, “You disobeyed me! Did you do that on purpose?” your hand around his neck flexes, “Are you just a dirty incel that wants Mommy to get mean with you? Answer, Tomu!”

“Yes, Mommy!”

“Tell Mommy what you are…”

“I-I’m a-a… dirty incel.”

“And what do you want?”

“W-want… want Mommy to b-be mean to me…”

You lift him by the collar and attach the leash. He’s thrown onto the bed and you waste no time hovering your dripping slit over his face.

“Now,” you jerk the leash, “Clean up your mess.”

Tomura knew he should be disgusted right now, but his dick was getting harder by the second. With each lick inside your sloppy hole, he shamelessly moaned against your skin. The vibrations were going straight to your clit, causing you to ride his face harder. This went on until you’d almost reached your peak.

“Oh, baby,” you’re making Mommy feel so, so good, “I-I’m gonna…”

Tomura grabbed your ass and moved you back and forth on his face as he sucked your clit into his mouth. Your orgasm hit hard and fast. You lifted your body giving him a moment to breathe before sitting back down, earning a startled mumble from him.

“Don’t think that’s all,” you laughed and humped his face, making his eyes roll into the back of his head, “Be a good boy and mommy might even let you come…”

Tomura only nodded as he began to eat you again like he was starved. Maybe all the stuff you posted in the Discord server wasn’t so annoying anymore...

#Shigaraki #tomura shigaraki #shigaraki tomura #shigaraki x reader #shigaraki tomura x reader #shigaraki x you #bnha smut #tw // mommy kink #tw degradation #tw face sitting #jade writes smut

2K notes · View notes

hannigramislife · 3 years ago

Text

My reactions while watching the last episodes of Strangers from Hell: 7-10

----

I am in shock and I need to share

Because, uhm

What the fuck 😃

"What are you?"

"What do you think I am, babe?"

DID THIS MOTHERFUCKER JUST-

----

Me: *googles jagiya*

Me: *proceeds to faint*

----

I did not- expect

What???

I'm lowkey in shock

I still think maybe that was a hallucination from my part 😃

Which I wasn't even shipping them??? This is entirely the dentist's obsession point 😂

He decides stuff

You want the guy apparently?? Sure, absolutely, we support you as of now on 😂😂

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Moonjo (the dentist psycho): *lovingly touches MC's throat*

Moonjo: I love looking at this area

Me: can't tell if you mean that lovingly or in a "i fantasise about ripping your uvula out" kind of way, but okay ig

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New boy: *sweet and loving and kind comes to the apartment complex, hanging out with MC and asking him out for beer*

Me: Lmao, you're gonna die soon man, i'd run 😆

This loving and cheerful??? In this economy??

He's just asking for it now 🥱

Moonjo doesn't strike me as the sharing kind 😂

----

YASSSSSS

There's this asshole that its mc's (Jongwoo) boss, and he keeps mistreating Jongwoo, belitting him and even wants to steal his gf

And now our man Moonjo has entered the sceneeeeeee 🤩

GET FUCKED

He's so creepy, I love him so much 😭

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My boy really went there, insulted the boss to his face, real calmly and with a smile

What an icon

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Moonjo: listing how Jongwoo feels, how well he knows him, what he fears and how everything's gonna be okay

Jongwoo's gf who's in the room with them: 👁👄👁

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God bless this psychopath 😭

"He acts tough like this because he's in front of a woman"

LMAOOO NOOOOOO HE REALLY WENT AFTER TOXIC MASCULINITY LIKE THAT

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AJSKSLDODIFKEJFLALDJE

HE CALLED JONGWOO BABE AGAIN

I cannot handle him, my heart

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I'M SCARED NOW WOAH

THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY

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UNIT 310 RUN, TF U HAVING DINNER WITH MOONJO FOR

"It's human meat"

He gives zero fucks ❤

No fucks seen here, no sir

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Unit 310 is done for 😃

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Man really saw his gf as Moonjo looooooolll

Miss girly didn't appreciate that, Jongwoo 😂😂

...um tf

Not only is Unit 310 alive...he's on Moonjo's side now???

I'm confusion

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HE'S TRYING TO GET JONGWOO TO STAY WITH THEM, TF?!?!?!

"They're not bad ppl, you should open your heart to them"

Umm i call bullshit???

What's going on

@Moonjo what did you do

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NOO IM LITERALLY CRYING NOW THIS GOT SO SAD

MY BABY

UNIT 310 😭

Dear cinema gods let him live

He's precious and lovely and has done nthg wrong in his life, ever

He's scared 🥲

Bye im gonna go die in a pit

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You murdering dentist psychopath

You touch a single hair in 310's head

I will personally find a way to kill u

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IS HE FUCKING READING FRANZ KAFKA TO HIM

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Not the squid games now ffs 😭😭

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Safe to say, i'm never going to a dentist again ever

Ohhh they're fighting now

Which no duh, man kidnapped his gf

Man should have watched Hannibal- this is NOT how you get your local anxious mentally unstable socially awkward love interest to dedicate his life to you

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Did he just give him a fucking teeth bracelet

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Them: fighting to death

Jongwoo: still wears the bracelet of teeth Moonjo gave him 👀

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Woah. Jongwoo is fucking ruthless

Did Moonjo really die?

Also, I am confusion

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WHAT THE FUCK

IS GOING ON

WOAH

Oh...my...god

Oh my fucking god

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I...have never been this shocked before

I can't even describe the amount of revelation i just went through

This guy is giving Will's breakdown a run for its money

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It's like he's become a new Moonjo, and the last word of the show is a whispered "Darling" as Jongwoo's face is overshadowed by Moonjo's as he is in the hospital bed, writing die die die die die repeatedly in his laptop

This was all actually very unsettling

Honest to god it hurt my soul

Like, it appears that Jongwoo's darkness was greater than all of them put together???

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@braceletofteeth

I genuinely don't know how to feel 😃

#strangers from hell #hell is other people #webtoon #jongwoo x moonjo #seo moonjo #yoon jongwoo #kdrama #nbc hannibal #what tf did i watch

147 notes · View notes

s-brant · 3 years ago

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Pirates and Princesses (8/8)

(gif: @beccs) (PART SEVEN) (SERIES MASTERLIST)

Summary: JJ must confront his childhood trauma when returning home for the first time since his dad went to jail and prevent it from sabotaging his new relationship. Meanwhile, something sinister happens at the Chateau that brings Y/N face to face with her grief over John B’s death.

Word Count: 13.4k

Warnings: Angst, implied sexual content, strong language, parent/child abuse, mental illness, post-traumatic stress disorder, grief, and fluff.

A/N: Welcome to the final chapter of Tokens! This one has a little bit of everything in it, but it also has detailed scenes about JJ and his dad, so proceed with caution if you’re easily triggered by that topic. The love you guys show this fic warms my heart so much, so thanks to anyone who stuck with this story until this chapter. Hope you enjoy it!

Now that she has been sentenced to both punishments, one as a consequence of the fight with Kacey and the other as a consequence of the stunt she pulled with JJ to break out of ISS, Y/N can confidently say that out of school suspension is superior to in-school suspension by a long shot. Instead of sitting in a humid room with Alec for the duration of multiple school days, she's allowed to stay home, go out surfing, and do whatever she wants in lieu of doing classwork.

She promised herself not to make it a habit, promising the invisible presence of John B that she likes to pretend follows her around that she will never get herself into trouble again, but she sees no problem in enjoying her suspension while it lasts.

For the first few days of her suspension, JJ skipped school to spend it with her. Their memories of the conversation they had at three in the morning on Sunday were fuzzy, but not missing entirely. She noticed a difference in his behavior for the first few hours after they woke up under the tree together for the second time in one week. It wasn't a difference in their relationship or how he treated her, it was a difference in him.

He was quieter than usual as they cleaned up cans of beer and tossed them into the recycling, sending pictures to Kie while she was in class after she made them promise not to throw them in the trash. Rather than cracking jokes or making casual conversation with her, JJ made his way around the yard with the recycling bin in his hands and his head in the clouds. It disappeared as the day progressed, but for a little while, he wasn't completely there.

Today, he went into school instead of ditching to spend extra time with her in between shifts at work and time spent with their friends. Since they can't exceed three consecutive absences without a doctor’s note and he doesn't own a printer or laptop to forage the header from a doctor's office, he had no choice but to part from her this morning.

He bites his lip to contain his smug facial expression at the recollection of her wake up call for him. The hand holding his locker door open for him to lean on in the midst of his not-so-wholesome thoughts of her squeezes the metal hard enough to turn his knuckles white.

The curtains weren't shut all the way when they fell asleep before midnight last night, allowing a shaft of sunlight to shine in and land on his face. But that wasn't what woke him up from the dream he was having. In fact, the reality he opened his eyes to was a hell of a lot better than any dream he remembered.

Most of his memory of those moments spent suspended between consciousness and unconsciousness consisted of feeling her pressing a kiss to his shoulder, then her hands rubbing up and down his waist to slip lower and lower until they settled on the waistband of his underwear. It was then that he woke to find her looking up at him for permission from where she peppered kisses along his chest.

Their eyes met right as she kissed the edge of his nipple with this pleading, needy look that he took pride in causing without actively attempting to. She woke up on the brink of coming undone from a pleasant—to put it tamely—dream about him. With a glimpse at the time displayed on the alarm clock, it didn't take much for her to roll over to wake him up.

It ended with her beneath the sheet, finishing what she started Friday afternoon until he was clutching the pillow beneath his head in the midst of his orgasm. It happened so fast, a fault of how hot he found it to wake up to her wanting him so badly, but it felt slower than it truly was in the early morning haze of exhaustion they felt.

The memory as he relives it is as heady as it felt the first time around. He sees it in fractions; her eyes looking up at his, warm palms finding the familiar planes of his muscular body with the exploratory touch of someone who's never traveled it before, and the intense sensations he felt at the end...It's easy for him to stand here and lose himself in it. Despite the class he has to go to, he bargains with himself for one more second spent in the paradise of his memories before he has to come back to reality.

Reality, as his shitty luck would have it, comes in the form of a familiar feminine voice chirping from behind his back as he replays his morning bliss.

"It's good to see you're alive and well, Maybank."

He decides, based on who he knows he'll see when he turns around, that he might invest in a sharpie to write "Bang head here" on the inside of his locker door for instances like these where he'd rather suffer brain damage than speak to someone he can't stomach the presence of.

When he turns to see Kacey with one arm still stretched to hold his locker open, he doesn't bother concealing the genuine reaction from his face for the sake of her feelings. Any care he had for her and her feelings was thrown to the wind as soon as she decided she could steal from and put her hands on his girl last week. However, after a second of thought, a condescending smirk finds its way to his face.

He says, jerking his chin to vaguely gesture at her bruised up face, "Purple really suits your complexion. It makes your eyes pop, don't you think?"

Though the swelling of her black eye has deflated in the days since the fight that’ll soon tally up to a week, the verbal jab hits right where it intended to if the light leaving her eyes tells him anything. She bounces back after a second, though, ever the relentless pest they've come to see her as.

She offers a sickeningly sweet, yet fake smile to mirror the one gracing his striking features and spins so her back meets the locker beside his, allowing herself to invade his space further.

A collection of Y/N's stickers decorates the inside of his locker door that he briefly entertained the idea of designating as a place to bang his head against. They range from girly, glittery ones to those he willingly picked when she gave him the choice. Whenever they're at his locker together, she sticks one on the inside, and the evidence of the habit catches Kacey's wandering eyes.

Her fingertips brush against the surface of the sticker-covered metal while she ignores his protest of, "Can you not touch my stuff?" to inspect them. Since one of the Pogues in particular is famous for her endless supply of stickers, her expression sours at the thought of the girl responsible for them.

She spares him a quick glance out of the corner of her eye as she continues to analyze the sticker collection against his instructions not to, asking, "Why weren't you at the bonfire?" A failed attempt at a seductive look in his direction makes him fight not to roll his eyes. "After how last year's ended, I thought you wouldn't miss it for the world."

JJ doesn't bother to take a second to think things through before he reaches to slam the door closed with her hand still outstretched inside of it. Watching her pull it away just in time to avoid jamming it in the locker probably pleases him more than it should, but he can't help it. His hand catches on the edge of the door, halting it in place right before it closes where her hand previously rested.

She doesn't look too happy with him when he opens the door with no harm done except for the drop of her stomach when he initially pretended to swing it shut on her bruised knuckles. She didn't get many shots in on Y/N when they fought, but apparently it was enough.

He doesn't bother with the fake niceties she's giving him after the disrespect she showed him, his friends, and, most importantly, his girlfriend. The fact that she thinks she has any right to breathe in his direction, let alone flirt with him, after she stole JB's bandana is criminal. 'Cause not only did she mess with Y/N, she messed with John B on multiple levels, and his loyalty to his best friend hasn't disappeared with death. Kie and Y/N told him everything she said about their departed friend in the locker room last Thursday.

But he's smart enough to know what'll hurt her more, so he doesn't go for the general scolding he imagined giving her in his head. Since he was told everything about the encounter in the locker room, he knows she's still holding their history together near and dear to her heart.

"We stayed home," he says, casual and cool as always, with added emphasis on the first word, "You know how it is, my girl doesn't like parties. Especially not ones with kooks."

Hook, line, and sinker.

She scoffs, "Your girl?"

Looking at her now, he wonders if she was always this stupid, or if this is a new development she's had in the year since he last spent more than a minute or two at a time with her. It’s easier to trick her than it was with Kie and Y/N a few days ago, and those poor girls flew into that trap like moths to a flame.

"That's what I said, isn't it?"

The ire is visible in the way her face tenses up in places, her lips pressing together a little more firmly and her forehead creasing between the brows.

"Doesn't your, um, history bother her?" she asks, and he's gotta give her credit for being a sneaky little shit when given the chance. The girl takes every possible opening she can to strike for a potential weakness. "No offense, but you kinda get around."

He shrugs this time, deciding to drop his casual act and aim straight for the jugular.

"She likes having someone who knows how to fuck her right, actually, but I really appreciate the concern."

Much like Kie's reaction to their matching tattoos in the hot tub the other night, her jaw is unhinged to meet the unswept hallway floor they stand on. It makes him wish Y/N weren't suspended in order for her to see the gobsmacked reaction Kacey has to the harsh dismissal. Though he wouldn't want to incite an extra round of the Kacey vs Y/N WWE showdown by having her watch another girl flirt with him and essentially call him a slut upon rejection, he knows she'd get a kick out of it.

This one's for you, baby, he thinks with a quiet laugh to himself and turns his focus to the sticker collection she so lovingly crafted.

There are plenty of summer themed ones left over from the same pack he gifted her for her birthday with the surfboard sticker she used to tease him, as well as a newer genre of Valentine's Day stickers she started using the closer they grew since first getting together. They're mostly different colored candy hearts with corny phrases ranging from "U SXY THING" to the classic "BE MINE" and one printed with "ANGEL" on it—his favorite by far.

However, others are random ones from her endless stash built up over the years from birthdays and holidays deemed worthy enough by her dad to stop by Dollar Tree for a new pack, so the one he sets his attention on is likely meant for teachers or coaches to give to their students. The opportunity appears too good to be true to him when it clicks, but it isn't.

He peels the sticker off of the locker door, careful not to disturb the ones around it, and leans in closer to her to place it on the front of her tank top.

"Leave us alone or I won't stop her next time," JJ says lowly, past the point of civility, then backs away to slam his locker shut for real this time as his voice raises back to a normal volume, "And keep John B's name out of your mouth, got it?"

All she can do is look down at the sticker placed on her shirt with squinted eyes to try and read it while he walks off in the direction of his next class. It tears away from the fabric with a soft noise, and when she finally reads it, she rolls her eyes.

“Good Try!”

Walking out of school to see the Twinkie parked in the usual spot Y/N takes when she isn't suspended is a delightful treat he didn't know to expect after a rough day in class and his run in with Kacey. His head was hung low on his way to Kie's car to hitch a ride to his house before going home to the Chateau, since he had some things to pick up with his dad out of the picture for the near future, but then he heard her greet them.

JJ's body melts into hers upon contact, and he nearly pushes her up against the closed passenger side door of the van with how hard he hugs her. Though he doesn't want to acknowledge it, his dad has been living in his thoughts more than usual today. Ever since he texted him goodbye, he's been withdrawn inside of his head more and more, and after today's inconveniences, the rising anxiety of his plan to visit home has him two seconds from losing his mind.

Her eyes widen at his zeal, meeting Kie's concerned gaze from over the shoulder she rests her chin on. She stands with her keys swinging around her finger as she watches the couple embrace one another. In an answer to the silent question Y/N asks her in their stare, her lips mouth the words, "His dad," to her.

Deep down, Y/N had a feeling.

It began with his impromptu request to run away with her a few days ago and extended into his uncharacteristically reserved attitude the next morning that receded somewhat, but has yet to fully disappear. There is a part of her that's upset that he hasn't come to her to talk about it, to communicate the way they swore they would, yet she also knows it isn't that simple.

She has to remind herself that she knew what she was getting herself into with him. That's not to say that dating her must be a walk in the park for him, it isn't.

She knows based on the amount of times he had to hold her as she cried, or the time he curtailed her panic attack in this very parking lot, that she hasn't made it easy for him in the aftermath of John B's death. But it's because she knows how it feels that she has such patience with his communication issues.

It's not a conscious choice most times, it's an involuntary blockage preventing the words from being spoken no matter how desperately they long to be. They may have made a promise, but she won't chastise him for succumbing to the same pitfalls as her. It’d be hypocritical.

"Bad day?" she asks.

Her voice is tender with him, prodding gently for a clue as to why he pounced on her on sight. He sinks further into her arms at the sound and lets the sanctity of her touch sway him into submission. Everything about her sets him at ease, if only for a second. Her hand lifts the beat-up red hat from his head to allow the other to brush through his hair.

There's a hum of agreement that she feels vibrating through the center of his chest into hers, and her arms pull tighter around his shoulders in response. This time, when she looks up to see Kie there, she's waving a quick goodbye and setting off toward her car, clearly giving JJ the space he needs.

"We can go to the beach," she says softly, "I have a towel in the back of the van, we can just lay there and talk about it if you want."

The idea of her kind offer to him should add to the comfort he finds in her embrace. It should make him nod and whisper his gratitude to her for being the one person that knows him better than anyone, but it brings him back to the gloomy headspace he was in before seeing her.

It started as a minor distraction when he first arrived at school after carpooling with Kie. It followed him in the quieter moments, only making appearances when he wasn't distracted with more pressing matters. It began as that and built the closer the day came to ending. The sooner his inevitable visit back to his childhood home came, the more he lost himself in his fear, reverting back to a state of helplessness he now occupies with no small amount of shame.

His bottom lip trembles with the urge to cry.

"Can we stop somewhere on the way home first?"

The last place she expected him to drive the Twinkie is here.

As they made their way down each street, taking each turn necessary to bring them closer to the house he seldom let her go to over the course of their lifelong friendship, she felt her heart begin to race. And now, as the van rolls to a stop in the yard in front of his house, she has swallow back the lump in her throat at the sight of it.

She has only been here a few times.

The first time, she was seven years old.

It was a sweltering summer morning in the Outer Banks for her and John B as they set off to retrieve their friend after he missed their plans to meet up at the Chateau for a day of having fun, riding bikes, and playing on the boat. Pirates and Princesses was her favorite game to play with them because JJ would switch roles with her halfway through when she grew tired of being the damsel John B had to rescue from the most cruel and vicious Captain Jesse James Maybank.

The HMS Pogue would rock beneath his feet as he marched across the deck of the boat and took her place as the kidnapped Princess Routledge. He handed off his "sword" to her, a stick he found in the yard, and stood at the edge of the boat with his hands behind his back as though he were a tied up damsel in distress for her to hold captive. The sun setting behind them laid a picturesque backdrop that made the scene all the more vivid to their imaginative young minds.

The boat floated in the afternoon current as John B approached the pair with his best pretend face of worry for the fair Princess Maybank, who had the sharp sword of the pirate queen pressing into his throat with the threat of death should he have tried to escape.

Sometimes, she'd let John B advance on them and tie make believe rope around her wrists and ankles while he and Princess Maybank claimed their victory. Other times, they'd get backed up until the heels of her sneakers hung off the edge of the slippery deck. One move from her brother would have her yell something along the lines of not taking either of them alive, then she'd let her and JJ fall back into the marsh together with gleeful laughs infiltrating the humid air upon their return to the surface.

On the day he didn't show up, none of that happened. She and John B rode their bikes together along sidewalks until they pulled into a driveway marked with the address number he remembered from the other time he sought him out to play before.

Y/N didn't understand what they were hearing when they pushed their kickstands down and called out for their friend, but John B's little face blanched at the sound flooding out of the opened windows of the dilapidated yellow house. It was a combination of banging against the walls, glass shattering, and childlike shouts of frustration and pain. Her big brother placed himself in front of her protectively when the front door opened and smacked against the side of the house, but it wasn't his dad storming out of the house, it was JJ.

His eyes widened at the sight of the siblings standing there, and his heart dropped to his stomach at the realization that they heard it. Maybe not all of it, but based on how the girl peeking out around John B's shoulder looked at him, they heard some.

The van is parked in the exact same place their bikes once were, the exact place she and John B stood years ago when they were first confronted with the harsh reality about their best friend's home life, and he looks like he has fully backpedaled into the state of mind his childhood self inhabited. Even when he turns the key in the ignition and lets the rumbling engine sputter down in silence, he sits in the driver's seat with his lip drawn between his teeth in thought.

Yet as soon as she summons the courage to say something, he takes a deep breath and opens the door without a warning or the typical instruction for her to stay in the car. He doesn't tell her to follow him in, nor does he order her to stay out as he used to when his dad still lived inside. He gives her the choice to make on her own, and, when faced with the opportunity to support him or stay outside like the confused little girl she once was, she chooses the first option.

Her swift steps kick dirt up from the earth onto her ankles as she follows him out of the van to the front steps of the house. She tries not to make her concern for him as evident as it'd be without her intervention on her way up the porch, but it's impossible to erase every sign of it from her face.

It isn't a particularly special or scary house. It's a normal home that'd likely look more inviting if JJ were still living here to mow the lawn and tend to the household upkeep his father saddled him with since he was old enough to be put to work. But she knows better than to trust the street appeal. As he takes her hand to lead them through the threshold of the haunted structure, she is overcome with a sense of creeping trepidation that she can't shake.

"You're sure he isn't here?" she asks.

The entryway is crowded with stacks of mail his father wasn’t bothered to open, as well as empty cardboard boxes that once held cans of beer that are scattered, empty, in various places around the house. Her question is answered by the state of the rooms they breeze past in the direction of his bedroom, but she needed something to say to fill the silence. With them, they usually don’t feel uncomfortable not speaking to each other, but this feels different.

The way he stares out in front of him with his hand squeezing hers hard enough to cut off circulation unnerves her more than the tainted energy of the house itself. He isn't himself. He's a shell of the JJ they know and love, the JJ who is most comfortable tucked away in the safe walls of the Chateau with their friends, not here. If anything, how he is while he's here is the antithesis of his behavior while living with her.

Ever since John B died, he's practically moved in with her. When they're hidden away in her house without the reminders of his home life in sight, he's usually the caretaker of the relationship. It comes naturally to their dynamic, both with him being slightly older and his promise to take care of her, but everything is flipped here. It's an alternate reality for him, or, perhaps, actual reality smacking him in the face after a carefully constructed two months in utopia with her.

They come to a stop in front of his closed bedroom door.

"He's gone," he says, not even sparing a glance at her for reasons she can't decipher, "He texted me a few days ago to say goodbye."

With that, he turns the doorknob and lets the door swing open to reveal the bedroom she only saw one other time.

The second time, she was thirteen years old.

It was a Friday.

Since his dad was supposed to be at work, they stopped at his house on their way home from school exactly like they did today so he could share with their friends what he got from his cousin the night before. Being the good girl she was, she didn't even know what he was showing her when he dug it out of the backpack in the bottom of his closet.

Her brows furrowed at the ziploc bag, more specifically the contents inside of it. She was knelt down on the floor in front of the opened closet door with her shoulder pressed up against his to inspect it. The dried green cluster of a plant didn't look like anything she'd seen before, and she couldn't help but ask him what the hell it was rather than react the way he knew the others would.

"What is it? It looks like dried up moss."

JJ laughed and pulled another bag with rolling papers and a grinder stowed inside.

"It's weed. My cousin Ricky gave me a discount since—"

He halted mid-sentence abruptly enough to startle her, his head turning in the direction of where he heard a trunk pulling up to the front of the house. Her stare was still set on where he was holding the plastic bags in his hands, and she noticed, after he stopped speaking in reaction to his dad coming home, that his hands began trembling. It was so minimal, she almost didn't catch it until she saw the bag wavering under the light coming in from his window.

Before she could open her mouth to say anything more, she felt his hands on her shoulders shoving her into the closet. He followed in closely behind her and crawled in until they were both crammed into the confined space together. With the closet doors shut in front of them, he clamped a hand over her mouth, whispering in her ear for her to be quiet.

She stands with her arms crossed over herself in the center of his room, and though nothing has yet to be said or done to convince her anything is wrong, that's the exact reason why she feels so unnerved by the entire experience of coming here.

He's silent.

The closet doors are wide open as he stuffs the rest of the clothes he had yet to bring to the Chateau into the biggest bag he could find. He rips through his belongings in a fit of melancholy driven anger. His thoughts are swirling with similar memories to the ones she conjures from being here again, but his are tinged with a darkness hers don't have, even with hearing him crying in pain as a child and hiding in the closet with his hand smothering her mouth to evade his dad.

JJ visibly grimaces at the memories he's forced to relive in flashes with every glimpse he gets of the room he spent so much time hiding in. It used to be more tolerable to be here, or at least easier to suffer through. At least he was used to it before, but he got so accustomed to life somewhere else that the second he was confronted with coming back, he started to fall apart.

Whatever he can't live without, he finds space for it in the bag and prepares to leave the rest behind. But every object he touches and step he takes around the room brings him back to the person who he spent his adolescence simultaneously fleeing and wanting more from. More notably, it brings him back to the train of thought that has been nagging him ever since he texted him over the weekend.

The third and final time she came here was over the summer.

It happened right before Hurricane Agatha waged war on the island, when none of the Pogues heard from JJ for two days after he said he had to go home to help his dad with something. She didn't want to track him down to his house after they went over twenty-four hours without a single message. She didn't want to have to go back to the house that gave her chills to think about, let alone go to again after they hid in his closet when they were younger, but he gave her no other choice.

What was she supposed to do except go check on him where he last said he'd be? After all, if she lived in the hazardous environment he did, he'd do the exact same for her. If their friends were involved in her thoughts at the time, they would've gone out on a limb to say he would've gone beyond what she did to protect her if the situation were flipped. If he knew someone was hurting her, he would've come in swinging first and asked questions later, but, in her defense, he strictly told her to never come back to his house. By walking over in the first place, she was breaking one of the fundamental rules of their friendship.

Nevertheless, she found herself crouching around the side of his house to find his bedroom window and check if he was in there. Kie and Pope weren't aware of what was happening with his dad yet, but she and John B accidentally found out years ago, so she wasn't wondering why he wasn't answering them, she was wondering if he was alive.

Part of her truly thought underneath it all that Luke might've killed him. He might've been too drunk or high and went too far when beating him, too far to the point where he didn't want to risk going to jail to take him to the hospital for help. She couldn't live with herself if she didn't check, and if he got pissed at her for showing up against his wishes and didn't want to speak to her ever again, she could live with that.

She knocked on his window in a cadenced beat loud enough for it to heard through the room but not any further. After the first series of knocks, no one came to the window. It ripped her heart to pieces to wonder if she'd see him again as she continued to knock and allowed the sound to increase in volume in hopes that maybe he was asleep, but it didn't bring anyone to the window.

It wasn't until she turned back around to go to the front of the house again that she bumped right into the solid wall of his chest and was pushed back up against the house. The question of what she was doing there was on the tip of his tongue, but she said something that stopped him from asking it.

Her arms were thrown around his shoulders in a desperate bear hug.

"Oh God, JJ, you scared me half to death!" she cried into the front of his shirt, "I thought he killed you!"

He can't help but think of it as he packs his belongings away for a final time to bid his hellish childhood home goodbye: What kind of life are they going to have together if they can't get off this island? Running away may have been an idealistic drunken fantasy for him to entertain after his conversation with Pope got him to admit his true feelings for her, but they both know his consistency can't be trusted.

One moment, he's planning to tell her. The next, a day like today comes along, sweeps his legs out from beneath his body, and he's questioning whether it's worth it to force her to put up with his fickle commitment to her. It isn't fair to her, is it?

Right now is just about when he'd normally start to hyperventilate with an oncoming wave of panic, and he does, but he can't let it fully sweep into him with her here. He fights the urge to smack his head with the heel of his palm, as if that'd forcibly remove the poisonous thoughts infiltrating his mind and ruining the careful work they've done together to remedy their issues with communicating their feelings.

Just like you ruin everything, a thought whispers in the corner of his mind. What made you think this would be any different?

His actions around the room have turned somewhat aimless and distracted, which she notices as soon as he starts to disintegrate into a mess of heavy breaths and self-sabotaging thoughts. She picks up on the shift in his energy as soon as the anxiety starts to wash over him, and she'll be damned if she continues to stand here quietly to let it happen.

It's one thing if he's being silent because being here upsets him, or if he simply doesn't know what to say, but she refuses to let him tailspin into a mental breakdown without doing something to stop it. Whether he knows it or not, after what they went through with him trying to push her away last week, she knows what's occurring within his mind right now.

He flinches at the feeling of her hand grabbing his shoulder to turn him to face her at first, and when she reaches again with her other hand to try to hold his hand as he cries, he shrugs off her touch.

"JJ..." she lets the solemn sound of her own voice murmuring his name trail off, "it's just me."

His head shakes at her consoling words. Everything else inside of his mind is so earth-shatteringly loud, he can't drown it out with logic or reason to bring himself away from the memories of his dad. Those intrusive thoughts keep attacking him with doubled, then tripled force the harder he tries to resist them, and he's so exhausted from it. All of it—the memories, his dad going to jail, and his inability to accept her love to its fullest extent without convincing himself she'll abandon him—is exhausting.

This time, when she rests her hand on his shoulder, he swats it away as the frustration of today crushing him with the force of an avalanche. Not to hurt or scare her, but to get her hands off of him before he bursts out of his skin with the sickness it stirs in his stomach. So detached from himself, he anticipates pain from every touch she gives him, and he knows it hurts her.

JJ hardly recognizes his own voice as he backs away from her a step and says, "Don't."

He can tell it hurts her based on how she looks at him immediately after, but he can't handle being touched right now. How did this happen so quickly? It was overwhelming when they first parked outside, but as soon as he stepped foot inside, it was as if a switch was flipped inside of him and all of the buried feelings he kept hidden over the past two weeks exploded into this.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to—"

"You need to leave. I just-I can't breathe and"—He still refuses to look up from the ground or see her face as he paces around the room with no real intent in mind—"You can't see me like this."

That is what breaks her out of her soft spoken, timid attitude to handle the situation the way it needs to be handled. Their natural dynamic worked best for him to take charge when she had her panic attack because JJ acts first and thinks later. He saw that she was in distress and jumped in to help her before things got worse rather than allowing her to keep him at an arms length where he couldn't do anything about it.

Taking a page from his rule book, she takes action.

The room surrounding them is in a state of disarray from him searching through it for the items of clothing and objects now stashed in his duffel bag. There are multiple obstacles in her way as she steps between them like navigating a minefield to reach him after he backed away in instinctual fear, but they don't stop her from reaching him. Nothing could.

Y/N walks right up to him and reaches to grasp his face between her hands, forcing him to stop pacing around and actually look at her for the first time since they arrived her so he hears what she says. To say the least, the way he looks right now is enough to make her cry. There are tears welled up to the brims of his blue eyes, his lips are downturned with his sobs, and he's staring at her like she's about to strike him.

She says it as slowly and clearly as she needs to get it through his head, "He's not here," and before he manages to squeeze out another word of doubt between his rapid inhalations, she cuts in, "Take deep breaths."

He isn't listening to her.

The movement of his chest that hits hers from how close they stand to each other has yet to settle into the familiar pace she remembers from nights of falling asleep with the rhythm of his breaths beneath her head.

Her eyes search his face frantically, from left to right and top to bottom, for any sign of the person she's known for years, but she doesn't see him. Instead, she sees the same panicked child her and John B saw the first time they visited this house. It's uncanny how similar the expression in his face is. It feels to her as if she's been hurled back in time to the moment itself, and when she tries to think about what would've worked with him back then, she doesn't know what else to do except help him escape.

So, with the helplessness of having to watch him turn into a sobbing, incoherent mess, she decides to step into the darkness with him and do what seven year old Y/N would've done. Just like their games of make believe, of pirates and princesses, she assumes the role John B would have and rescues him from what holds him captive. It’s his own mind in this case, but, in the physical sense, it's the house.

She drops her hands from his face and takes his hand in hers to drag him out of the room. The packed bag sits on the floor in their wake as she pulls him back through the bedroom door and into the living room, not caring about what they came here to do.

It doesn't matter anymore.

The various rooms of his dad's house pass by them in a blur as she leads him down the hallway to the front door with one sole objective in mind: get him out of here. If he wants his stuff to bring back to the Chateau, she'll go back inside and get whatever he needs her to, but she isn't letting him inside of this house again. Not under her watch.

Thankfully, since he is undeniably stronger than her and she wouldn't have stood a chance, he doesn't fight it. He stumbles after her guiding hand the same way he always has, just like how he followed her back to the Chateau after she and John B saw him that day when they were kids. She led the way as he sat on the handlebars of her brother's bike, and he watched her hair flutter in the wind with the momentum of their bicycle spokes until the tears dried up.

He watches her drag him out of the home until they've reached the safety of the yard at the bottom of the porch steps, and as soon as the soles of her shoes meet the dirt, she feels his hand slipping out of hers.

"JJ?"

She turns around to see him clutching his chest, rubbing his hand along the front of his shirt over his heart as though it'll loosen up the tightened muscles preventing him from catching his breath. His body weight is leaned onto the railing of the porch steps for support. He's partially slumped on it, looking at her desperately, like she somehow knows the answer to every question screamed inside of his head, and she has never felt as useless.

"You're gonna leave," JJ says through the gasps and cries that leave his cheeks stained with tears.

When she reaches out again to help him remain upright without leaning over the railing, he doesn't shove her hands away as he did inside of his bedroom. It's a small battle won, but she takes it as a win nonetheless.

"What are you saying? I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere—"

"You're gonna leave! Everybody does! My mom, John B, my dad, and you"—his head falls to look at the ground instead of her, and she watches him work through it in his head—"I mean, look at me. You don't want this."

"Don't tell me what I want," she says.

Her voice remains as steady and calm as she can force it to be amidst the turbulent situation, but the way he said it...It takes her right back to sitting in the back of the Twinkie with him at the Cherry Bowl, except it's ten times worse. That felt like a break up, but based on what he's saying, this is one. She hasn't prepared herself for the heartache she feels in response to it.

"You don't want me, you just think you do 'cause I was there after John B died, but you don't. You're gonna go off, find some perfect guy that isn't as fucked up as me, and have a great life somewhere else, but it ain't here," JJ says, his breathing evening out with the distraction of the argument to keep him tethered tor reality, "And it won't be with me."

He can see it every time he's looked at her and debated saying those three titular words that have been floating around in his head since he first met her.

How could she want someone who can't walk into his childhood bedroom without breaking down, or someone who still has years-old scars from cigarette burns on his skin when she touches him? Her bright future contrasted with his pre-designated fate on the Cut, her personality better matched with someone more similar to her, her life continuing on whether he's there or not—it's his worst nightmare, but he's prepared to see it through.

What he doesn't expect is for her to hold her ground.

"You honestly think I'm buying into that bullshit?" she asks.

"What?"

She doesn't put it softly, she states facts with as much harshness as his cruel fantasy had, "You're trying to push me away and I won't let you."

Her typically sweet, soft features have hardened into a bitter expression he's sure he mirrors. The arms holding his waist to keep him upright move to climb up his chest and cup his face between her hands with all of the gentleness her face and voice don't have right now.

She sees right through him.

When he tries to look away again, to avert his eyes to make what he's trying to do easier on himself by not having to look at her when he does it, her grasp on his face holds firm. Her hands guide his chin back up so they're face to face, and he realizes what a mistake everyone makes in assuming her this dainty, broken girl whose only source of strength came from the brother she lost. She's a forest fire.

"You're not hearing what I'm saying—"

Y/N interjects, "I am hearing what you're saying, I'm just saying it's bullshit."

She refuses to let him off the hook, and though it frustrates him on the surface, deep down, it makes him fall in love with her all over again. Her insistence against his speech about her leaving him proves him wrong more than anything else could, 'cause he gave her the perfect chance to dip and she shot it down instantly.

The house looms behind them as a menacing presence that threatens to take control of him again, but she doesn't let it. She keeps his eyes on her no matter how many times he tries to look away and doesn't let anything get in the way of what she says next.

"You think that if you push me away and get me to leave you right now, it'll hurt less than it would if I did it later, and I don't accept that. I won't take the bait and let you torture yourself anymore, okay? I can't speak for anyone else, but I know I'll never leave you. Not willingly, anyway."

She looks into his eyes, and this time its softer, more loving, and he's never felt as understood as he does when she continues to speak.

"I'm in love with you. Whether it scares you or not, it's the truth, and I'll never stop saying it. If you think that your issues with your dad are gonna change that for me, you've officially lost your mind." Their noses brush as she leans in to ghost a kiss over his mouth and pulls away a second later to whisper, her forehead pressed to his, "I love you, JJ. Stop being so stubborn and just let me."

His next breath in trembles as he lets her words sink in, and he's stuck at a crossroads inside of himself without a clue of what to do.

The breeze blows her hair away from her face, the afternoon sunshine painting her golden, and when he sees her hair flutter in the air like it did so many years ago, he can't help but feel as calm as he did during their bike ride home. The further away he got from his dad and the house where it all happened, the calmer he grew, and it hits him at this moment that he's so taken aback by her confession to him, he forgot why he was so upset.

It's sobering. The intoxication of his panic hurtled him back in time to the frightened, childlike state of mind his dad's violent abuse often sent him to, but it was hearing her say those words he's feared for weeks that brought him back. Like the jolt of a defibrillator, he's roused back to life with more clarity than before.

She loves him, but, perhaps more importantly, she said she'd never leave him, and that is what he needed to hear more than anything. That is the statement worth more to him than the four letter word he has agonized over endlessly. No one else every attached the promise of "I love you" with the stipulation of it lasting forever. They said the empty words and contradicted it with their actions, but she hasn't done that. Her actions spoke the words long before her mouth did.

He sighs.

It's a deep, yearning sigh that sends him melting into her with the acceptance of what he's denied for too long. He savors the hands cradling his head, as well as the body pressed up against his that he has memorized down to every beauty mark and imperfection, and makes the right choice.

It isn't like it was the night at the Cherry Bowl, or the night he spoke to Pope about it. It still takes more bravery than he possesses to form the words, but there isn't a physical incapability stopping him anymore. It's just him against the trauma beckoning him into its trap again, and he won't let it lure him back into that house.

"Alright," JJ says to her through a sniffle in acceptance to her command, as if he were agreeing on afternoon surfing plans rather than something as monumental as allowing someone to love him, then continues onto with a timid tone, "I love you too."

Before he can watch for her reaction, she's surging forward through the few inches of space left between them to connect their lips in a kiss.

It's vastly different to the kiss they shared in the hallway at school last Friday. In contrast to that one, the reigning emotion within him that drives the kiss after the hesitant beginning doesn't lead them into increased intensity, it gets gentler. It doesn't explode into chaos and passion, it's a tired kiss that he never wants to retreat from. It's the physical manifestation of his feelings for her underneath the guarded exterior he uses to protect himself: gentle and yielding, yet undeniably powerful.

He feels her smiling through her tears against his mouth. In the face of everything that happened this afternoon, he doesn't feel like he should be smiling back at her, but he does. He smiles while kissing her with tears streaming down his face, still reeling from his traumatic response to coming home for the final time, and wonders how a person can feel such contradicting emotions all at once.

Y/N is the one who starts to pull away first, though it's only to check in on him. If she had it her way, she could stay here with him until the sun sets, but he did just come back from the brink of a full-blown panic attack, so she can't in good conscience ignore his well-being for the momentary bliss of their love confessions.

Her thumb brushes over his bottom lip, her smile drooping with worry as she asks, "Wanna spend the rest of the day on the boat? You always say being on the water makes you feel better. Maybe it'll make it easier to talk about it."

His Adam's apple bobs with how he swallows the lump in his throat.

"Can we maybe take baby steps for now? I don't think I can handle telling you all that shit yet."

It was already enough to allow her to follow him into the house, watch him break down into a fit of panic no one else has seen him in, and tell her he loved her, but it'd cross the line into uncharted territory to talk about everything between him and his dad so openly. Between the minor annoyance of dealing with Kacey to this hellish visit home, he thinks he's reached his quota on feeling uncomfortable today.

She nods in agreement.

"Baby steps."

Drawn back to each other by a force stronger than gravity, they collide again, but it isn't a kiss this time. It's a hug charged with all of the previously unspoken emotions they've buried inside of themselves for years, the same hug she gave him the last time she came to this house with the fear of his potential death lingering in her thoughts.

She throws herself at him with the same desperation she did that day and relishes the feeling of his muscular arms returning the embrace until their bodies are tangled together. She'd usually never refer to something as inherently affectionate as an embrace as violent, but it's the closest she can come to capturing how it feels as their bodies meet. It makes her lose her footing on the bottom step they stand on together, teetering on the edge she'd surely slip off of with the force if not for him keeping her steady.

He's about to say something, a thank you to her for calling him out on his bullshit and not letting him go that easily, when the grating sound of her ringtone blares from the back pocket of her denim shorts.

The contact popping up on the screen along with a series of frantic messages when she pulls away from him to answer shows Pope's name.

Pope You and JJ need to get back to the Chateau ASAP!!

The van doors slam shut behind Y/N and JJ as soon as it rolls to a stop in front of the Chateau.

Under the assumption that something dire happened, as in injury or death or catastrophic damage to the house itself, they bolted off of that porch faster than they knew they could move. She only turned back when she remembered the packed back of JJ's things they abandoned on his bedroom floor and, not wanting him to reenter the house, she brought it back to the Twinkie in record time.

They're preparing to trample up the porch into the house like a stampede of animals when they hear Kie calling them over to the backyard and change direction.

"No one's hurt!" she shouts, knowing that was likely where their minds went after everything they went through during the summer, "You have to see this though, I don't know who did it!"

Sticks and fallen leaves crunch beneath her feet on her way around the side of the house. Her mind races with the possibility of what could've happened that didn't hurt their friends but necessitated a series of texts and calls as frantic as the ones she received at JJ's house. She drove over here in defiance of the speed limit, something she rarely does, and prayed nothing terrible was happening.

It gave her flashbacks to when she found out John B and Sarah died in the storm. The pedal beneath her foot brought the van to an uncomfortably swift speed, then she remembered the sound of Shoupe's voice when he gave them the news. JJ warned her to slow down, then she remembered how it took multiple people to help her restrain him from attacking the new sheriff for letting his men drive their friends into their deaths.

At first, she doesn't realize what's wrong.

Kiara and Pope are standing and waiting for them across the grass near the large tree that sits as a centerpiece to their yard. Based on the body language screaming their frustration and the tears in their eyes, she can tell something bad did happen, but it's not clear what it is until she looks past them to the tree. More specifically, until she looks at what's on the tree.

"Oh my god," she whispers to herself.

Her hand is already up to cover her mouth and conceal the instantaneous frown besmirching her previously relaxed face. They both are stopped in their tracks halfway to where their friends are standing, and she can’t hear JJ's reaction over the rising volume of her hysterical thoughts.

Spray painted in red on top of their memorial for John B are the words "COP KILLER" in bold letters that conceal what they burned into the tree trunk for his gravestone. It sticks out from the beauty of the greens, browns, blues, and swathes of other earthy tones composing the scenery around the Chateau like a thorn amongst flowers, so much so that she wonders how she didn't instantly see it when they rounded the corner to come back here.

Yet that isn't the only thing amiss in the peaceful sanctuary they call home, there are random things strewn around the ground around the tree. An old t-shirt spray painted with the word "murderer" on the front, four ripped up envelopes, and a gorgeous mahogany jewelry box...broken on the grass.

The freshly turned dirt they had the contents of the box buried beneath is scattered around the trashed area as well. It clicks with her a few seconds late that whoever came here to do this must have seen the pinwheel she put in the ground to mark the "grave" and dug it up to add insult to injury.

She moves forward without consciously realizing it and stumbles until she reaches the first object of the debris field. Before this, she was doing a masterful job of holding in her cries, but as soon as she crouches down to pick up the pieces of the jewelry box, the lid snapped clean off the hinges to separate it from the bottom section, it comes rushing out of her against her will. The first unrestrained keen is the first thing to snap JJ out of his shell shocked trance.

He walks after her as fast as his legs will take him without breaking into a run, but she isn't letting him get close before she puts the box back down and shuffles forward to collect the torn letter remains. She doesn't want them to get blown away by the wind anymore than they already might have been, so she scrambles to gather the pieces until they're cupped in her hands to protect them.

"Why?" she asks and looks up at Kie and Pope with tears dripping down her face, "Why would anyone do this? Who would do this?"

Pope says, "My guess is as good as yours. We didn't see anyone leaving when we got here, so it must've happened before school ended. This is all we saw before we called you guys."

For a second or two, JJ is grasping at straws for why this happened and who did it like the rest of them are, but then something Pope said makes it click into place. It sets off a domino effect in his mind as he brings back the memory of a certain offspring of satan being absent from gym this afternoon despite being at school earlier, since his encounter with her before Physics made him, unfortunately, aware of her existence again.

His face is set in anger, jaw clenching with the tension of him grinding his teeth together, and he takes his hat off to fidget with it between his hands for a second. Their friends are too focused on her crying to see him contemplating it, but as soon as he speaks, they look up to see him setting his hat back onto his head in preparation to leave and track Kacey down.

Y/N's head snaps up from the torn letters in her hands to the sight of him storming off across the yard with his only goodbye being the words, "I'm gonna kill that bitch."

Her and Pope stare after him in shock, unable to put the pieces together about who that "bitch" is, but Kie doesn't miss a single beat. While Y/N is crumpled over on the ground in tears, she's rushing after JJ before he can approach the bike parked in front of the house. He doesn't even make it five steps before he feels her hands latching onto his wrist to stop him.

She asks, "Who the hell are you talking about? And why would they do this?"

His eyes narrow at her. His unreleased frustration for the situation in general and having to watch Y/N cry after an emotional afternoon together comes rushing out when he snaps at her.

"Kacey. She talked shit at school and I put her in her place. Now, if you don't mind, I'm gonna pay her a little visit."

He yanks his arm sharply towards himself to free it from her grip, but she's a step ahead of him. Quicker than he can think to stop her, Kie swipes the keys hanging out of his back pocket away and throws them to Pope, who, bless his heart, can't catch to save his life. The key ring jingles with its contact at the dead center of his chest, and she mouths an apology to him before turning back to face JJ.

"What the fuck, Kie?"

He makes to stomp past her and retrieve the keys from Pope only to be stopped by her hands reaching out to grab his shoulders.

"Listen to me, you can't go anywhere. Look at her," she whispers lowly enough to keep Y/N from hearing, pointing behind her to where she sits on the ground with Pope knelt beside her, "I wouldn't put it past Kacey to pull a stunt like this. I'm just as mad as you, but revenge can wait and you know it. She needs you."

The fury visible in his expression is subdued by looking past Kie's shoulder to see Y/N crying softly to Pope about the vandalized memorial.

The last time he saw her so distraught over something, it was the day they made the memorial and buried the box in the first place. She sits on her knees with her mom's broken jewelry box between them, shuddering with the sobs she has no control over, and pours the torn paper into the empty bottom half of the box. Exhausted to the core, she looks more like a sullen, kicked puppy than she does herself.

It makes his anger-fueled instincts that urge him to hunt Kacey down and do something, anything he can to make her feel the pain they do right now bubble down into sorrow. It's visible in his eyes when he looks at her.

Kie knows she's gotten under his skin when he sighs, sparing a parting glance to the bike in the driveway, and nods once at her before setting off back to where they're sitting in the grass.

Meanwhile, Y/N is stuck staring down at the disarray of her backyard with nothing but pain aching through her to the bone.

Her brother did wrong things sometimes as a consequence of being human, but never this, never something worthy of having his name dragged through the mud and being branded a murderer after his death. He stole scuba gear from Ward and broke dozens of laws in their hunt for the gold, but he never crossed that line into moral bankruptcy. Rafe did, and it kills JJ to see someone like Kacey do this to his best friend while hanging off of Rafe and his friends like a leech.

The fabric of his worn t-shirt is tarnished by the dried paint clinging to the front of it to the spell the lie written there, and her vision blurs with tears for what feels like the millionth time in the span of an hour. First, it was JJ. Now, it's John B, and she can't help but wonder if the heartache will ever end. It began to feel better over the course of the week, her grief for him slowly beginning to slip from her mind until now. Until the storm clouds converged again to batter her with another wave of it.

Through the deafening volume of her mind racing with thoughts and feelings to process what's happened, she hears Pope shuffling around to stand on his feet. Then, another person sits down in his place and scoots closer until their bodies are touching, and she knows it's him. She doesn't have to wait to hear his voice or look to see his face, she can tell based on the feeling of his touch and the smell of him she's so intimately familiar with, yet couldn't describe it aloud if she tried.

He doesn't smother her. He sits close enough to touch her and doesn't push it any further.

The background of the pale, cloudless sky frames him in the foreground like the subject of a painting—a living, breathing painting that she could study endlessly. The other trees planted in the yard's leaves flutter distantly behind him and try to draw her gaze away, but she keeps her eyes on him.

Maybe that's how it is, she thinks.

Maybe it'll get better and worse in a dance that'll only stop when they're no longer here to agonize over it. Maybe this is what moving on from John B will always be like. It'll feel like they've made strides in the right direction, then something will come along to shatter it to sharp pieces that'll reopen their stitched up wounds. If that's the case, at least the four of them have each other to lean on when it gets worse again.

JJ sits with her and lets her crawl onto his lap, resting her head on his shoulder, until the sun sinks below the horizon.

The gentle bobbing of the HMS Pogue at the surface of the water steadies her amidst her eddying thoughts. It keeps her present to the moment the way the ropes tying the boat to the dock keeps it from floating adrift into the marsh. It's a motion engrained in her from the start of her life until now from countless days spent on the water. Whether it be for fishing, swimming, or playing make believe with her boys all those years ago, it's as much a part of her as her personality or body itself.

JJ was right about one thing: being out on the water makes it easier to think.

He hasn't followed her out since she woke up before sunrise and snuck out of bed to come here. Despite her efforts not to wake him, he woke up when she disentangled her body from his, silently cursing the fact that they always cuddle so closely, and he tried to pull her back to him with a whine of displeasure in his groggy, half-asleep state. Sleep finally found them after hours of staying up together to talk about what Kacey did, unable to relax from the chaos of yesterday, so he wasn't prepared to wake up that soon.

"Go back to sleep, angel," she whispered as she hovered over him, brushing a chaste kiss to his lips that he was too tired to return.

That was the last time she saw him since this morning, and now that the sun has risen to its peak in the sky without her moving an inch from her perch atop the bow of the boat, she's begun to wonder if he's awake yet. It isn't uncommon for them to sleep in for half of the day when there isn't school or work, so it isn't surprising to her that he's just now waking up when she hears the back door to the Chateau opening and closing.

Unbeknownst to her, JJ has been awake the entire morning since she left bed.

They were so attached to each other yesterday night, he didn't have the time to put it together without her seeing and ruining the surprise, but once he heard the door to the porch close to signify her leaving, he kicked the blankets off of himself and got to work. He wasn't originally planning on starting so early, since they stayed up late into the night together, but once he woke up to the feeling of her sneaking out of his arms, he was too awake to fall back asleep.

The sound of his footsteps on the dock warns her of his approach, but she doesn't raise her head from where she rests it in her palms to stare out at the water.

"I was wondering when you'd finally wake up," she says.

There's another few steps, then the boat jostles with his weight stepping onto it.

He doesn't say anything to her in response. The only clue she gets as to what he's doing are the footsteps on the deck that lead closer to her until she feels him sitting down on the bow next to where she is. And she's about to open her mouth to ask if he's okay when he sets something down in front of her.

It's a shoe box.

Y/N turns to see him, eyes flickering over his tired face, and looks back at the box with furrowed brows.

"What is this?"

His hair is messy, exactly how it was when she left him in bed this morning, and if she weren't more focused on the mysterious box he plopped down in front of her, she'd be combing through it with her fingers. He's gotten used to those casual displays of affection from her; how she runs her hands through his hair on mornings before school when he forgets to brush it, or when she fixes a button on his flannel that he missed.

JJ's lips are tipped in a smile, and she can't help but blush with how he looks at her. She never used to see it, but he has always looked at her like this. Like he's hopelessly, utterly in love with her. Even before they lost John B, back when he'd expend all of his romantic and sexual attention on girls he hardly knew, he still looked at her this way.

He gestures at it and says, "Open it."

The lid of the box is coated in a freshly dried layer of blue paint to match the shade of the sky overhead. She knows instantly that he must have dug through the arts and crafts box she specifically labeled with a warning for him and John B to stay out. It's painted with aimlessly sloppy brushstrokes and stickers placed at every corner of the cardboard box, all of which she recognizes from the stash she kept under her bed alongside the India ink he borrowed last Friday.

As she gives him a skeptical look and reaches to lift the lid off of the shoe box, she makes a mental note to rewrite the label on the arts and crafts box without the warning for him to keep out. Since John B isn't here to steal anything from it and JJ never follows that rule anyway, it's redundant at this point.

Any skepticism is washed away from her face as soon as she flips the lid open to reveal what's inside. It leaves her speechless as she looks down at it all.

"JJ..." she murmurs in awe.

Sitting at the bottom of it is a folded up t-shirt she saw JJ wear multiple times, but never again since John B died. He refused to glance at the shirt his best friend gave him the year before they never saw him again, let alone dig it out of the corner of her closet where he keeps his things...until now.

But that's a scratch on the surface of all of the things about his gift that stuns her to silence. The next thing to catch her immediate attention is a picture she hasn't seen in years.

It's one that Big John took of the three of them together right where she and JJ are sitting. She was much younger in it, flashing a toothy grin with her arms thrown over both boys' shoulders. To her left, John B was leaning his head on her shoulder. To her right, JJ was wearing an eyepatch they crafted out of an old black shirt he stole from his dad. It was cut with the kitchen scissors and tied around the back of his head in a knot.

She brushes her thumb over John B's face, then sets the crinkled photograph back down atop the folded shirt and moves her attention to the last surprise.

Letters.

Torn up pieces of paper painstakingly taped back together sit one on top of the other, some missing pieces here or there, and it makes her mouth part in shock. Her hands shuffle the letters apart to see each one and recognize the handwriting: Kie's bubbly, swirling letters, Pope's neat cursive, hers, and JJ's chicken scratch writing that she's able to decipher from years of proofreading his essays.

She pictures him at her desk all morning while she was sitting out here, ripping tape off of the roll and arranging the puzzle pieces of the ripped letters until he was sure he got it right. It made him want to rip the hair from his scalp, but he sat there and pushed through the frustration to make it as perfect as he could for her. The missing pieces were primarily from Kie's letter, which fluttered away on a balmy breeze when Kacey tore it up and threw it to the ground, but the one he wanted her to have the most wasn't missing more than a single piece.

Y/N looks up from the letters held like a precious treasure in her hands to see him watching her with that same classic JJ smile on his face, but he doesn't let her get a word in yet.

"Go on," he says, leaning closer to pull his letter to John B out and place it on top of the pile for her to read, "I want you to read it."

"You didn't let me read it when I asked before though, are you sure you—"

He interrupts her before she can worry herself over it, "Dude, just read it. I promise I'm fine with it. I want you to."

The letters crinkle under her touch as she looks back down and smooths them out on the deck enough to read through the clear tape. With one last confirming glance to him for permission, she takes a deep breath and reads the first line.

Dear John B,

You really know how to keep a guy on his toes, don't you? You really outdid yourself on this one. I was so sure we were gonna make it, but I guess you had to go all Romeo and Juliet on us, huh? As long as you and Sarah are happy macking on each other in heaven, it's okay.

In all seriousness, I fucking miss you, bro. I miss you more than I realized a person could miss another person. Whenever I need to talk to you again, I don't know what to do. I guess that's why it's good that Y/N made me write this.

Also, I'm really sorry for—

"What does it say there? There's a whole chunk missing," she murmurs.

He scoots close enough to her that she can feel his body warmth radiating onto her through the shoulder of his flannel. Sunlight reflects on the silver rings decorating his fingers as he holds one side of the paper to tilt it enough for him to squint at.

"Macking, I think. It's supposed to say "I'm sorry for macking on your sister."

—macking on your sister. You can totally kick my ass for it, but before you come back from the grave to murder me, let me defend myself, okay? She isn't just another girl for me, John B.

I think you knew it before I did.

Last summer, you asked me straight up if we were hooking up behind your back after I kissed her in front of you on the porch. I laughed in your face, but you were right.

You saw everything before me, man. You knew I loved her since we were kids and waited for us to come to you about it, so that's gotta mean something, right? I hope it means you wouldn't be mad at me for this.

I swear I won't fuck it up with her, but you already know that. That's why you asked me to take care of her,. I didn't know why at the time but I do now. I won't let you down.

I'm keeping my promise.

- JJ

P.S. Don't miss me too much. We'll be shotgunning beers together up there before you know it.

There are tears blooming in her eyes when she lifts her gaze from the tattered paper to look at him again, but they aren't sad. For once, the tears slipping down her cheeks are happy tears, not born from grief, sadness, and pain, but bittersweet happiness.

They're caught staring at each other for a second before he asks her shyly, "It isn't too sappy or anything, is it? 'Cause I thought it—"

"C'mere," is the only thing she can get out before she's tugging him forward by the front of his shirt to kiss him.

JJ stumbles a little with the unexpected force of her pulling him to her, but he takes it in stride. He steadies himself and lets his hands shoot out to grapple for purchase on her waist, keeping her pressed up against him tightly as he kisses her back.

And it doesn't get much better than this, does it? This is it for him. He meant what he wrote to John B, he won't fuck it up with her, especially not because of his trauma with his dad getting inside his head and sabotaging his relationship with her. This is what makes everything worth it.

It brings happy tears to his eyes too.

She can taste the salt of them where their lips meet in the middle. It makes her smile, wrapping her arms around his neck and clenching the letters he mended for her in her fist to keep them from blowing away in the wind, and they both start to laugh into each other's mouths at the poignant feeling they both share but can't quite place.

They pull away from each other to catch their breath after another moment of it, and she can't help but stare. How could she not when she feels like this? It’s less like he’s her boyfriend and more like a piece of her soul has attached itself to his with no hope of letting go in the near future.

"You're the best thing that ever happened to me," she whispers to him.

Plain and simple. No room for disagreement or a bashful rejection of the compliment. She's pulled back from him enough to hold his gaze and make sure he sees her seriousness, and there isn't anything he can do to refute her statement.

He brushes his nose against hers affectionately, dipping down to kiss her again, but when he leans back to see her face, he can't help himself.

"Ditto."

The rest of the day after their moment on the boat, locked away in their own little world where none of the monsters chasing them could sneak through and ruin it, melts away peacefully. After another half hour spent looking through the box together, of her thanking him over and over again, he hops off of the HMS Pogue onto the dock and extends his hand to her in the most gentlemanly manner possible.

His lips are curved into a smirk as he kneels down on one knee as though she's a revered royal and bows his head in subservience, "Princess Routledge."

Her hand fits in his warm, calloused palm as a perfect match, and she steps off of the boat onto the dock beside him with an expression to match his.

"Captain Maybank," she says in her most regal royalty voice.

Her stellar performance breaks into a laugh they share as he stands and throws his arm around over her shoulder to walk back to the yard. The cardboard box is tucked beneath one of her arms while the other slips around his side to hold him back, and her heart feels full with both the presence of JJ and John B alongside her.

They bury it together.

Tag List: @gabiatthedisco, @fangirlvoice, @black-syren, @apparrio, @particularcth, @planetdemon, @idk-ijustworkhere, and @krisphann

Also, now that it’s over, let me know what your favorite part was in the comments or tags if you’d like to :) I’m curious.

#jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank smut #outer banks #obx #fanfiction #i'm gonna miss these dorks #🥺#I love how he tries to break up with her and she’s like ‘no❤️’#also totally do not put on ‘seven’ by Taylor Swift during the childhood flashbacks unless u wanna cry #cause I did and my sensitive ass was crying #that song is about John B and JJ okay #it just is

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