#girl you are literally copying their fucking homework. as you speak

[softwaluigi]

god this new layout fucking sucks

[thegeminisage]

ok we watched the tng pilot. let's get into it

data is my best friend on this show and i love him

i liked riker but jonathan frakes looks like a baby without facial hair. he's gotta grow that in. also, at one point he asked someone a question and i got really excited. he should ask more people more questions i think thats what jonathan frakes was born to do. that and sit in chairs with style

also liked geordi even though we only saw him for 3 seconds and worf even though same.

the sections with q draaaaaaagged. ik people like q and whatever he has going on with picard but i'm just not there yet. this "humans are NOT savages anymore" plotline has been played out in tos many times to better effect

actually shocked picard was such a dick. idk why i was expecting him to be more kind maybe i was projecting professor x onto him?? but he kinda sucked lol like what was EVEN going on w his little pissing contest with riker

love and light, there should not be children on a starship. space is fucking dangerous. they're literally boldly going where no one has gone before. these kids could get hurt

the ship??? splits?????????? IS THAT LEGAL????

ok, furthermore, sorry, speaking of kids, not to be a misogynist but out of the 3 ladies (troi, crusher, and yar) i dislike 2 of them. love and light to deanna troi but i really hope she gets something to do besides emote and go OH THE PAIN...her look was slay. i understand completely how she turned women gay. give her something to do. give her a chance. i know she could be good.

i didn't mind dr crusher until she let her kid on the bridge even though you're not supposed to do that and they told him to touch nothing and he proceeded to touch everything and then she got mad when picard got mad. picard spent 70% of this episode being a dick and the one time he was justified she was like :/ wow you're such a dick. lmao. girl come on he literally said don't touch anything he was already being nicer than he had to be. the child was in the wrong children shouldn't even be on this ship

also they talk about wesley like he's their affair baby. idw if its true but nobody tell me. let me believe it. wesley crusher destined to suffer through male pattern baldness

also, i can see now why you're not supposed to date your ship mates. dating them is fine but being exes with them is excruciating and we had TWO PAIRS this pilot

anyway. tasha yar was rad i DID love her.

it's weird though how many of them use first names...in tos sometimes they didn't even use last names, only titles. spock called bones "doctor" almost exclusively. so riker calling geordi geordi after like 5 minutes of knowing him was a little weird

i cried when bones showed up. sue me. his prosthetics were terrible and i already miss him so much.

SPACE JELLYFISH. that part was good

overall both the adventure and the interpersonal stuff was a little ????? which is like. you can flop on one or the other. i DO have faith it will get better but i feel kind of lukewarm on it so far

there's a lot of direct counterpoints to tos, but it's shuffled JUUUST enough so it feels like it isn't copying tos's homework word for word but rewording it to trick the teacher. for example, data is like spock in that he doesn't understand emotions or whatever, but it's actually the inverse because spock understands and pretends not to, while data truly doesn't understand but wants to. then you have deanna troi who's sort of filling in for the other thing spock used to do, which is give us general impressions about unknown alien life, but she SPECIFICALLY does it through emotions so she doesn't resemble spock too much. the captain and first officer have a lot of scenes together but they're tense so it doesn't look too tempting to the slash fans. the doctor is still a bit grumpy but she's a woman this time. they don't use tricorders but geordi's special prosthetic helps them see all that shit anyway. it's tos but shuffled. lmao that it took 2 people to replace spock <3

anyway my favorite part, aside from the part bones was in, was when riker and data talked in the holodeck. and riker was like actually yeah the fact that you're a machine DOES make me uncomfortable. and data is like well i am superior but i'd like to be human actually! and you could see the little gears in riker's head turning and later he called data friend. i liked that and i love data. i love data he's very important even though the pilot wasn't good i think i would keep watching no matter what for data. and i knew it would be like that.

[hwangsbbg]

Just a kiss - Yangyang

Synopsis : Yangyang and reader are best friends and they end up going further than just kissing in an attempt to check their kissing skills

--------------------------------------------------------------

"I'm not watching that movie another time" Yangyang complained as the two of you made your way to your house. It was a tradition for him to sleep over every Friday night and for you guys to do a movie marathon.

"But its a classic" You whined as you saw you were a couple steps away from reaching the front door.

"A classic we've watched literally a hundred times. Can't we watch one of my movies instead" He replied watching you open your front door.

"We can watch one of your movies, and one of mine. And if we can't get along on the last movie we can just play video games" You walked in your house, immediately making your way to your room.

"Are your parents not home?" He asked considering we'd always be greeted by them as soon as we entered the house.

"My dad travelled for work yesterday and my mom is visiting her parents. I told you this like ten minutes ago" You rolled your eyes.

"I forgot to listen" He grinned at you, following you into your room where both of you set your bags on the side of your room.

"Did you finish your homework for the weekend or are you gonna end up copying on me" He practically jumped next to you on the bed as he watched you remove your shoes, doing the same.

"I finished it during my free period this time" you replied, proudly, as you removed your cardigan, throwing it to the other side of the room.

"Wow! For once! You deserve an applause" He dramatically clapped for you. You rolled your eyes playfully.

"I'm gonna take a shower, you can go in after if you'd like" You walked towards the door that connected your room to your bathroom.

"Or I could always join you" He laughed making you laugh as well. You shook your head at him playfully before finally going in.

You finished rather quickly and when you were out you realized Yangyang was missing. You called his name while putting on a new pair of underwear and an oversized shirt he had actually given you.

"I'm coming! I'm grabbing some snacks" He replied from the kitchen as you set up the movie you wanted to watch on Netflix.

Yangyang walked in with a tray full of snack and grinned as soon as he saw the shirt you were wearing.

"You're wearing the shirt you stole from me" "You gave it to me" "Yeah after you wouldn't stop stealing it" He laughed, setting the tray on the table next to your bed and jumping in the bed next to you.

"Aren't you gonna take a shower" you questioned.

"Oh yeah" He remembered. You laughed as he stood up making his way to the bathroom. A few seconds later he walked out, shirtless.

"Can I use your shampoo" You definitely heard him, but your eyes were more focused on his bare upper body that was displayed before you and you couldn't think of anything else.

"Wh-What" "can I use the shampoo" he repeated his question, smirking at you.

"Y-Yeah of course" You finally managed to look up at him. He laughed at your reaction before walking back into the bathroom.

You laid down on the bed, quite embarrassed, making yourself comfortable as you scrolled through Instagram, waiting for him to come out and start the movie.

You were so focused on your phone however, you completely forgot about Yangyang who walked out of the bathroom and walked in on you laying down on your phone with half of your ass exposed by your shirt that had been lifted up.

He coughed a little trying to get your attention, and it worked, however you had no idea about your situation and you simply looked at him smiling.

The thoughts that crossed his head at that moment were far from innocent, certainly not the kind of thoughts you would have about your best friend.

When you turned your head, you noticed he was only wearing a new pair of pants but his abs were once again on full display and it was turning you on in ways you couldn't imagine.

You hadn't had sex ever since you broke up with your boyfriend last year and to say you were beyond sexually frustrated is an understatement. To add on to that you have an incredibly good looking man standing shitless in front of you. What would you expect.

Your eyes trailed up from his abs to his eyes to see he was staring at your ass and you quickly sat up, laughing nervously as he copied your actions, laughing as well.

"where's your shirt" You asked him as he took a seat next to you on the bed.

"I tried to put the AC on when you were showering and it isn't working, it's way too hot inside for the shirt I brought" He explained making you nod in understanding.

"I bet Talia would love to see you like this" You Spoke after a while, remembering the quirky girl who dared come up to you and tell you to back off of Yangyang.

"What do you mean" He looked genuinely confused which made the situation quite comic for you.

"You know Talia right?" "Which one" "The skinny brunette one with the green eyes" You explained and he instantly understood who he was.

"High heels Talia? The one who tried failing maths so I could tutor her" "Yeah! That one! She told me to back off her man because she thought we were dating"

"What did you say" He was almost dead laughing. "I told her I've done some things with her 'man' she couldn't even think of" You laughed seeing him become all read and remembering how she stormed off after hearing that.

"Why would you say it like that" He laughed even harder. "Because I was tired of her always thinking I'm 'stealing you away from her' and I mean we have done some pretty crazy things.. just not what she's probably thinking" you explained.

Yangyang shook his head at you playfully making you give him a suspicious look. You wouldn't dare believe it but you had to ask him.

"Why.. are you like into her" you didn't mean to make it sound so mean but it just came out that way.

"Why are you jealous" he teased you, laughing at your reaction. You frowned in response.

"Come on! You're the only girl in my life! You know that" He tackled you into a bear hug, holding you tightly before letting go. During those few seconds you managed to catch a strong whiff of your shampoo and body wash and you realized how he was shirtless and had to force your mind away from inappropriate thoughts.

"Ok but I also have a confession" He spoke up after a couple of seconds of silence. "What did you do" knowing Yangyang, he was capable of the craziest of things and him saying that scared you.

"I kinda did the same thing you did with him" Yangyang admitted, shocking you.

"What!? When? How? Where? Why?" you had so many questions. He gave a nervous laugh before explaining.

"So I was walking to my locker and he came over to me and asked if I had seen you. I told him yeah but I wasn't going to tell him where you were. Then he told me he just wants to explain himself"

You shook your head. He had cheated on you. What was there to explain. You stayed quiet however and let Yangyang continue his story.

"I told him there was nothing to explain and he said I had no business in this and asked me why I was even putting myself in you guys' business. So I told him I have my reasons. And he asked me if we were dating or fucking and that it had to be one of those" he paused.

"What did you say" you asked. You were aching to know the rest.

"I told him why not both and he got super pissed and left" Yangyang admitted making you burst out in laughter.

"You told him we were sleeping together and dating" You couldn't believe what you had just heard.

"Yeah. I mean I thought he would have realized I was lying considering you could sense my sexual frustration from miles away"

"Not at all Yangyang, if anything you give off playboy vibes" you replied making him blush a slight red color.

"No but seriously I mean with that smile and those abs, you have like half of the girls at school chasing after you" You didn't even realize your hand was on his thigh until you met his eyes and saw him looking at it.

"Sorry" You bashfully apologized. "It's okay" He breathed out.

"Anyways, why would you give off sexually frustrated vibes. Don't you like.. touch yourself"

Yes, it was quite an awkward conversation but you guys didn't mind talking about things like this and that was a great thing in your friendship.

"I mean yeah, but it's not the same thing as having sex" he replied as if it were something you should have known.

"But didn't you hook up with Violet at the party last week" "She tried to hook up with me but I didn't want to"

You were quite confused considering Violet was considered one of the hottest girls at school and he was sexually frustrated.

"So I haven't had sex in like five months" "I haven't had sex in like a year! I don't know why you're complaining" you rolled your eyes at him.

"That's cause you didn't want to. Every guy at school tried hooking up with you as well. Your ex boyfriend spread the rumor that you were a great kisser but even better in bed"

"Yeah I heard the rumor. It's not false so I didn't bother saying anything" you shrugged.

"So you're saying you're a great kisser" "Well I'm not denying it" "I bet your not as great of a kisser as I am" Yangyang teased you making you laugh.

"I could show you" You spoke jokingly but noticed the serious look on his face.

"I was joking" You made it clear before you saw him smirk and speak up.

"I bet you I'm a better kisser than you" he challenged you. Only he knew his true intentions and how competitive you could be.

"Bet on what Yangyang. Twenty bucks" You sparked up at he thought of the new challenge.

"Ok but if I win you have to grant my three wishes" he replied. You nodded, sure you weren't going to lose.

"But how do we test this, do I have to kiss one of the girls you kissed because they all suck to be honest" you spoke making him chuckle before replying.

"I mean it's just kissing we could just do it together and see for ourselves". You raised an eyebrow at him and he shrugged.

You obviously wanted to kiss him, all betting aside, so it didn't take much for you to agree. As soon as you replied with a 'yes', he moved his hand to rest on the bed, at your side and leaned in to kiss you.

It was a really soft kiss and it made your head dizzy. You hadn't been kissed like this in so long. Your lips moved together softly before he pulled away.

"I don't think we can determine who's the better kisser from just that" you used that as an excuse to continue doing what you were doing previously.

Yangyang smirked, kissing you once again, this time more passionately. You changed position, both kneeling on the bed without breaking the kiss.You could feel his hands, one of the back of your neck and the other around your waist.

He licked the bottom of your lip, asking for entrance. You teased him, denying it to him, wondering what he would do next.

He completely surprised you when he let his hand trail from your waist to one of your ass cheeks and squeezed it making you yelp and allowing him to enter his tongue.

He grinned into the kiss as your two tongues danced together, Yangyang taking the lead and dominating over you. You didn't mind his dominance though, you found it hot. Hot to the point where you could feel your underwear slowly getting soaked.

You let your hands rest on his abs as the kiss continued on for a while longer before you pulled away.

"Wow, the rumors are soo true" He let out, quite out of breath making you giggle.

"I didn't even show you half of what I know" You smirked, proudly, as you saw him bite his lip. He definitely wanted you as much as you wanted him.

"Can you show me more in that case" He asked. You smirked.

"Only if you admit I won the bet" "Who the fuck cares about the bet at this point" He replied. You couldn't agree more. Things were definitely not going to be the same after tonight.

You pushed him back so he was sitting on the bed before climbing up onto him, straddling him. Without wasting any time, you reattached your lips to his, instantly inserting your tongue in his mouth and letting it be guided by his tongue.

After a few seconds you pulled away, stared at him and reattached your lips to him, only this time to his neck. He let out a clearly involuntary moan as you sucked all over his neck and softly grinded on him.

You could clearly feel his member growing in his pants, right under you ass. You felt bad for the poor thing that wanted to break free from the clothes he was locked in. He grabbed your ass with both hands and began rubbing on it making you curse in pleasure.

You looked up to see Yangyang biting in his lip hard as you continued sucking on his neck. You moved your ass a little to grind into him again, making the both of you moan out of pleasure.

You made your way back to his mouth, reattaching your lips as you felt his hands trail under your shirt. You felt him smirk into the kiss as he discovered you weren't wearing a bra.

"Were you expecting this" He pulled away, biting his lip. "No, I just don't see the point in wearing a bra in my own house. Don't feel too special" You giggled, reconnecting your lips.

He let his hands play with your breasts under your shirts, squeezing on them before taking both nipples and squeezing those too.

You let out a rather loud moan, not really caring considering nobody else was home at this time.

He pulled away, tugging at your shirt and within a few seconds it was on the other side of the room. You watched him lick his lips before flipping you over so that you were laying in the bed with him on top of you.

"Fuck.. you're fucking hot" he praised you, attaching his lips to your neck this time as he grinded his erected member right on your core that was only covered by your panties.

"Fuckkk" you both moaned as he continued kissing all over your neck and collarbone before he began moving down, grabbing one of your nipples with his hand and taking the other in his mouth.

He sucked and licked around you, enjoying the sounds of your moans before moving to the next one. He reveled in the fact that he was the one making you feel this way as he continued kissing your lower stomach all the way to your panties.

"You might be the better kisser but you've never seen what I can do with my mouth" He smirked as he pulled away.

You looked at him in shock. Was he seriously talking about what you were thinking.

"Please show me" You weren't going to bother lying, you were desperate to see what he could do with his mouth beside speak a ton of language and say the weirdest shit.

"You don't even have to ask" he kissed between your thighs making you shiver in excitement as he neared closer and closer to you.

He reached towards the waistbands of your panties, using only a few fingers to pull them off and toss them next to him.

"Holy fuck" He groaned, wasting no in attaching his mouth to your core. He first kissed it, sending an intense feeling all through your body before he licked between your folds.

"Oh fuckkk Yangyang" you moaned as he continued licking up and down before he thrust his tongue in your hole making your knees buckle in pleasure.

He reached up and began rubbing on your clit as he continued thrusting in and out with his tongue. Your loud moans only further encouraging him.

You felt heat pool up in your stomach as he used his other hand to play with one of your nipples.

"Ah.. fuck.. I think I'm gonna come" you let out in short breaths and he sped up his actions. He removed his hand that was rubbing on your clit but it didn't matter as he went deeper with his tongue making his nose rub against your clit.

You reached your first orgasm and it was nothing less than pure bliss and your entire body shook.

You watched him smirk in satisfaction, admiring your naked body and replaying the orgasm he caused in his head.

"Can you take anymore babe" You don't know where the nickname came from nor did you care. It sounded so fucking hot and you felt so desperate for him. And you knew how he felt too.

He stood up, giving you he perfect few of his member that was clearly very hard inside his sweatpants.

You licked your lips, making your way over to him and helping him remove his sweatpants along with his boxers, finally freeing his hard on from the prison it was stuck in.

You stared at his impressive size before slowly grabbing hold of it. He let out a small groan at the feeling as you began to pump on it.

"I would return the favor but I really want you inside of me right now" You loved hearing his moans but you couldn't wait any longer.

"Fuck- if you keep saying things like that I won't be able to control myself" "I don't want you to" you replied making him chuckle in response.

"Shit- I don't have a condom" he groaned in frustration before you spoke up, announcing you had one.

"For surprises like this" you spoke once again after seeing the eyebrow raise he gave you. He opened your bedside drawer and was surprised to see all the different types of condoms you had stored in there.

"You just keep them in here knowing your parents could see them" he looked at you in confusion.

"My dad never comes into my room and my mom gave me these" You watched as he scanned over the different sizes before picking up a large one. Seeing his size, it didn't surprise you.

He ripped it open using his teeth and easily rolled it on before positioning himself at your entrance. You moaned, feeling only the tip enter you as your whole body was once again overwhelmed with pleasure.

"Fuck babygirl" he unconsciously let the pet name slip as he grabbed on to your waist, pushing further inside of you until he was fully in.

"Fuck Yangyang" you moaned loudly as he began moving slowly inside of you before he started picking up his pace.

"F-faster.. please" you managed to let out as he went even faster than before and your moans became more high pitched and frequent. You were already nearing your orgasm.

Your hands went to his back, before the rested in his shoulders and he hit your gspot with each and every thrust.

"Ugh.. I'm close babygirl" you could feel him twitching inside of you as your walls clenched around him and, like he had announced, he came.

He continued thrusting though until the pool of heat in your stomach spread to your entire body as you also released for the second time.

He rolled over, laying on the other side of the bed as he tried regaining his breath while you did the same.

"I can't believe that just happened" You would have never guessed your weekly sleepover would turn into probably the best sex you'd ever experienced.

"I'm so happy it did" he replied, finally free of the sexual frustration that was bothering him.

"I mean it was only a matter a time considering the way you stared at my abs earlier" He teased you making you laugh.

"It wasn't as bad as how you were staring at my ass" you replied, returning the favor.

"You got me on that one. Remember the favor you owe me" he reminded you of the amazing job he had done to you with his mouth.

"How can I forget. Remember the three wishes you have to grant me" you also reminded him of the bet he lost.

"I just made all your wishes come true but if you need me to show you again I will" He replied cheekily, making you giggle.

[gaelballesteros]

“𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞, 𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐦? 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐲— 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞?”

“What does that have to do wi—“ He’s been played. Dragged into this survey under the false pretense that this was a questionnaire about Star Wars in order to win an autographed screenplay by George Lucas. “This isn’t for the Star Wars thing, is it?” The interviewer smiles and shakes his head. Gael lets out a resigned sigh before answering begrudgingly, “Gael Ballesteros, twenty-four, game design student, cis-man and uh I don’t know demisexual?” 

“𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞? 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐞, 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐠𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐬, 𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡.”

Brows knit together as he tries to recall some of the characteristics he got when he did his Pottermore quiz, something that could enlighten him to answer this. “Uhhh…” Why is this so hard? He just has to answer this question, he literally could pick any and they would buy it, okay perhaps not physical touch because in order to consider that he would have had to have any. “Acts of service, guess it’s always nice to do something for someone else.” Except murder, probably. Either way, it was through acts of service that he used to speak to girls back in the day, only because he let them copy the homework.

“𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐠𝐢𝐟𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐯𝐞?”

“Oh, if someone could ever give me the famous illustrator pikachu japanese card, I would die a happy man,” he says with a childish grin on his face. “I guess I could be a liar and say love or health but nope, that’s the most meaningful gift someone could give me because it means they like me enough to spend 200,000 dollars.” 

“𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐚 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐝𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮?”

“My extremely charming personality,” he deadpans before he shakes his head because he simply doesn’t have enough self-esteem to continue the charade. “Uhh I don’t know about compliments but I think the nicest thing someone could do for me is taking an interest in things I like? I’m not sure.” 

“𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮?”

“Playing some video games, going to a nice concert and skateboarding,” he wishes he could say something cooler like going to a crazy ass party but the truth is that Gael is a simple man, he just needs a good game, some good music and he could call it a day.

“𝐈𝐟 𝐚 𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟, 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐞, 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰?”

He thinks about making a sarcastic remark about a crystal ball but he doesn’t. “If they were real I would like to know if…” he makes a dramatic pause for effect, as if he was about to ask a deep question like will I ever find myself? Will ever someone love? The interviewer looks at him with interest because maybe Gael is about to finally give him some depth. “I will become world champion of Catan someday.” The face of the one asking questions falls in disappointed, shaking his head as he writes down the answer. 

“𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩?”

“Considering I’ve never had a relationship, I’d say just having one is what I’d value the most,” he admits bluntly. If you can’t laugh at your own misery then what else can you do? “I do value fun, sense of humor.”

“𝐀𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐫 𝐝𝐨𝐠 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧?”

“I’ve never had either and I have a feeling that cat don’t trust me and it’s mutual. Then again, I’m scared that if I ever owned a dog, he wouldn’t like me and would act like a cat towards me. That would be rough because dogs are supposed to love everyone, no?” The interviewer shrugs, confused and he’s regretting ever tricking this dumbass into this survey.

“𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞: “𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐦 𝐈 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞…”

“My other Switch joy con,” he admits with a deflated sigh, “you know how sad is to play Mario Kart on your own? Fucking depressing.”

“𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐜𝐫𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧? 𝐁𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟?”

He wishes he was a tough guy and could admit that he’s never shed a tear in his life but that is a lie. “Gonna be real, it was a few days ago. I was watching YouTube videos and I’m having fun, you know, I’m watching live streams of people playing games, maybe one or two live performances of Nirvana and then out of nowhere YouTube hits me with a recommendation video, one that I haven’t seen since my Digimon days… The Rainbow Connection.” He takes both hands to the side of his head, simulating an explosion. “Rainbow's are visions but only illusions,” he quotes, lower lip trembling. “Fuck, not even fucking Fitzgerald could have written such masterpiece.”

“𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮?”

“Well, as a twenty-four single guy with no experience, very. However, clearly not necessary as I’m still alive, although not by choice, the lack of physical intimacy I mean.” He notices how his interviewer is hurrying up to write the answer, clearly fed up with this.

“𝐀𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐕𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞’𝐬 𝐃𝐚𝐲?”

“That’s it?” Gael asks as the interviewer stands up and thanks him. “I thought you had another question there,” he says gesturing to the papers. “Nah, it’s okay man. I know the answer for that.” The interviewer says as he starts walking.

[imagines-mha]

class 1-B and night routines

Monoma: if monoma doesn’t annoy at least 2 people per night he simply will not sleep. Wears the comfiest pyjamas- like a 100% cotton top and plaid pj bottoms and everyones so fuckin jealous. He tells everyone he has a 16 step self-care routine he does every night but he really just brushes his teeth and then sits on his phone for like 2 hours? Ike what do you GET out of lying??? 

Tetsutetsu: he thinks going to bed after 11pm is criminal. Literally doesn’t understand the cryptidcrew™️ who DONT MF SLEEP. Works out before bed which is 👌🏻👌🏻 OOF. Aw hes the type of friend to make everyone tea and toast and send them asmr videos if they cant sleep i love him. He usually spends his night dancing around with pony and working off all his ENERGY

Kendo: “yall im turning into bed i’m too tired for this shit” “kendo it’s 7pm”

My girl will retire to her room as early as she can (usually with the rest of the girls) and she just RELAXES. Like self-care to the max: paints her nails, watches tv, plans her tomorrow, showers. She’s usually asleep at 10pm and wakes up the next morning full energy I want what she has

Awase: he has the WORST sleep schedule like fr. Literally sits up on tiktok until 3am and he’s just like “oh shit i’m up at 7…” *continues scrolling* like bro GET UR ASS TO BED U HAVE TRAINING AT 6AM. His night routine ain’t anything special- he sleeps in sweats and always keeps his window open (although someone told him about banshees once and now hes lowkey terrified lmao)

Kaibara- the type to fall asleep on the sofa and wake up at 4 in the morning to find tsuburaba in the kitchen eating a full course meal and he just SIGHS and goes up to bed in the worst mood bc why tf are his friends so WEIRD. Likes to watch the stars and edit pictures before he sleeps- its so therapeutic to him and also productive so he’s winning

Rin- he drinks coffee every night after midnight and then goes “oh my fuck shit i just drank coffee why am i like this” like congrats u fuckin dumbass now u ain’t gonna sleep. And he never fuckin learns. Always does his hw at like 11pm, Also stays up way too late binge-watching star wars smh 

Tsuburaba: he gets up every night and treats himself to a three-course meal in the kitchen no cap no sound awareness my man will be blending shit full blast at 2 in the morning. Usually falls asleep sitting at the kitchen table and he 👏🏻 needs 👏🏻 a 👏🏻 chiropractor 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻. Also always forgets to do his homework until everyone’s packing up to go to bed and hes like “please,, anyone,, the math?”. Shoda wants to punch him so bad

Ibara: the most well-structured person in the entire building. At 7pm she has her shower, at 8:30pm she goes to pray, at 9:30pm she journals and draws to calm her mind, and at 10pm she meditates until she falls asleep- which is usually 10:20pm.. Everyone wants her self control and independance like damn how does she FUNCTION. Also queen of vegan self-care remedies 

Pony: girl is chaotic as fuck it’ll be like 10pm and rin’s like “yo pony can i copy the hw??” And shes like “WHAT HOMEWORK.” . *cue two idiots freaking tf out*. She’s always wearing matching pj sets and fluffy socks and loves sliding around in them like a dork. Dances every night before bed to tire herself out like shes just in the lounge deadass vibing to taylor swift and a new person joins her everytime . people would be dead without her

Kodai: movies every night or she won’t go to class the next morning. Shes always just sitting on her phone w earphones in like she has absoloutely no time to deal with monoma’s shit so she just peaces tf out of existence. Cutest pyjamas ever i love her pyjama queen. The go-to girl for homework she just leaves her bag open, as long as u return it shes cool

Tokage: oh my god shes so CRYPTIC and FOR WHAT. Pranks pranks pranks pranks pranks. everyone hates her for it and she loves it so bad. Like she has the balls to prank kamakiri and that TAKES BALLS LET ME JUST SAY . she’ll just leave her body parts in people’s beds and its SO annoying. They usually just pick up her stray arm and fling it at the wall in revenge then act confused the next morning when she complains abt the bruises 

Komori: cryptic as fuck. Does she sleep? Why is she always sitting at the table? What is she doing? . Closes her tabs whenever someone comes into the dining room and just stares at them til they leave again like :)). In the garden every night til she can’t bear the coldness- watches the stars and makes flower crowns and worships the moon i love her

Kuroiro: nighttime is the time he just evaporates like where tf is he like 🙄🙄 reel it in randy from monsters inc . Hiding in the walls and listening to everyones conversations and secrets is his only skill in life . Everyone thinks he doesn’t sleep and just wanders around (he does, he just likes to have an edgy reputation)

Kamakiri- did you hear that?? oh its just kamakiri fistfighting monoma in the hallway again. Fr takes no prisoners he needs his beauty sleep (or idk do bugs sleep lmao??). If you’re in his way while he’s RAMPAGING to his room youre dead bro when i say he takes bedtime routines seriously i MEAN it. He does self-care and tells NOONE but its lowkey cute idk lmao why do i have a crush on a bug lemme call my therapist real quick

Bondo- 9pm. Wind down time. A good book is all my mans needs and he’ll be out for the count in absolutely no time at all. Fukidashi will die jealous and bondo fucking loves it. Milks tf out of it too he’s like YAWN I AM SO TIRED OFF TO BED NOW TO SLEEP PEACEFULLY GOODNIGHT and everyone who WISHES they could sleep as early as that wants him to choke

Manga- king of never having hw done until 1am at the earliest 🤡. He lives on 1 hour sleep most nights and his speech bubble just says “no <3” until like 11am. Its cus of his crippling hyperactivity he’s running the halls at 3am practicing the entire mamma mia choreography ffs fukidashi U HAVE A CAREER AHEAD OF U 

Reiko: energy drink addiction 101 if she doesn’t drink monster every night before bed she’s convinced she’ll die. “I sleep all day and party all night” she says, crying over math hw at 2am. Plays music too loud and has LED strobelites on ALL NIGHT. Shes deadass doing witchcraft in the lounge w komori all night during finals week she doesnt give a single fuck x

Shishida: another reader,, mans will finish an entire book in a night by the force of sheer willpower alone. Takes a bath every night and it makes his fur so fluffy and smell like apples smdnwjdnwd. Perfect snuggle buddy for wintertimes (pony LOVES HIM) and he’s that good man who carries tsuburaba to bed when he falls asleep at the kitchen table

Shoda: “please don’t speak to me while im doing my homework im 👌🏻 this close to having a mental breakdown and all it takes is a single poke to reel me over the edge.” Complains all day about being tired then goes to bed at 2am?? Like no shit ofc ur tired bitch . Always up for a deep talk at night he knows EVERYTHING abt EVERYONE and hes so trustworthy hed never tell a soul

Honenuki: he meal preps and does yoga before bed 🤢 like WHO HAS THAT MOTIVATION. Irons and sets his uniform out for the next day before getting his homework FINISHED by 9pm . He’s pretty flexible w what he does at nights it 100% depends on his mood. Usually he’s helping Tokage with pranks or working out w tetsutetsu tho. Used to annoy people who were up doing hw after 11 like “really tsuburaba? You should be ashamed”. Shoda almost DECKED him once for it tho and he was #traumatised and never did it again

[queenofallwitches]

an update and primer:

so the last winter was weird. I had a complete breakdown, went into psychiatric hospital for 40 days in total. two seperate times.

learnt a heap of new things, met a tonne of cool people and had amazing conversations and few fights but overcome my own demons by that.

brain speaking-I have a scarred brain stem and neurological disorder is not a mental diagnosis, but a neurological disorder, proven by MRI scan, ADHD.

also damage to my basal ganglia, and prefrontal cortex.

neurological diagnosis means ADHD is not a "mental" health issue, as some believe, rather a neurodevelopment disorder caused by structural differences in the ADHD brain.

other neurodevelopment disorders include: Tourettes, Autism, Cerebal Palsy, Dyslexia and other Motor and Intellectual Disabilities. (Which recieve, in my view, a lot of insight, media information and stigma reduction by the advocacy networks surrounding these types of disability).

Over the last few years Autism has been over everything, I've seen mainstream media cover Tourettes and yet ADHD is still HUGELY misunderstood, misconceived and misrepresented in media, be in from the angle of documentaries, personal insight of a "typical" case, films, tv, and other media.

one of the first things my dr told me was "in females it rarely presents as hyperactive red-cordial OD child"

which is what my mother BELIEVES, that is because I have an adopted cousin with the ADHD dx who was that growing up, but the representation I'm told is also divergent for women with a higher IQ score than the average IQ. I come in around 142 and tested 123 at age 3 when I was unable to focus, pay attention and had severe trauma. I tested 142 in grade 8.

I'll share my experience as a female who is intellectually gifted, with higher IQ than average, and an adhd brain:

I've been told gifted and talented "genius" children are harder to diagnose because the symptoms present differently, we hide it better (camouflage) and our focusing can be "faked" by mediocre efforts of academic success.. this is true, I would do the assignment the Sunday night hours deadline, last minute, or have my parents half do it for me, plagiarise it (fuck I've killed my whole academic career now) copied but changed my words

from old 1970s encyclopaedias I KNEW they couldn't cross reference (I went through 15 years of school never studying doing homework or assignments and still had top grades).

I literally did not listen, and spent my classes planning the end of the world survival strategies with my GT friend who, basically helped me with my calculus and hard fucking maths, which was the ONLY 50 minutes of the day I put attention into my work.

now I'm going to be heading back to full-time study in the coming months, I get anxious as the pressure of a Bachelor level degree, and the pressure it takes me to perform, is enough to break me down. I've been advised it might be wise to start light (like a basic vet style diploma) and then build up, which is logical, but I keep thinking I'm meant to be doing my thesis by now. which is the kind of pressure one gets as a kid who is told repeatedly, "your intelligence is exceedingly the average and you can do ANYTHING you want"

I wanted to be an astronaut, a storm chaser, and an architect, a town planner and then a journalist. I always held to being a "FBI agent" or spy (I wonder why). so when I found psychology is really a blend of all these things, I kinda found a niche in a psych and social science double degree. but I'm thinking my academic career is LIFELONG, and due to the fact I also want to work in my field alongside my many written thesis coming, I'll be in academics for a long time. I may fail a few things, which I have to come to terms with. I do not fail easily, or readily, but I'm a perfectionist type-a academic who will put my whole life on the line to achieve "merit". I get exams, I get assessments, I read journals super-easy, I talk the talk and walk the walk so well psychologists who are at masters level compliment me on my "knowledge".

when it comes to mental health and trauma, I will always have the personal attachment, called lived experience, which will make failure and burnout, 100 percent realistic. I have to boundary up, bootstraps on, and prepare that yes, my personal "bias" will probably be entwined in this.

which is why I'm looking at the social science for the statistics and thesis writing side of things, and the counselling for the trained therapist side. either way, the degree of counselling requires so much self-insight, and then the social-science will back me away from personifying it. the other choice is criminology, which leads to forensic psychology, which is eternally fascinating. my main concern is the pro-pedophile content Ill be up against, which will look at the anatomy of a shoplifter akin to the devil, and leave the pedophile in the DSM-5 dx "paraphilia" box.

I'm not joining or jumping to anything.

either way I've got 2 year of credit, a heap of pathways and a lot of "academic momentum" from all my life being aimed to be "academic powerhouse". I went through my files and found a lot of awards I'd won in my high school, and top place in the competitions we would be entering in. I remember feeling so sad if I had a "credit" vs a distinction or high distinction, only to see now, a credit in university maths in year 9 is a skillset I don't have anymore so, good on me. or a credit in English, or Science at that age was pretty impressive, considering these tests were random and not studied for.

just a general skills assessment only the top 30 kids in the year were to take on a year by year basis and put out to vet from the top universities and taken by other kids in the same grade around the state.

it puts so much focus on my intelligence, because it's primed to be that way, I know that is true. I know I feel good being academically successful and it gives me a feeling of "achievement" but is it really for me?

I also found 2 letters from my local politicians offering me job placement, work experience and I was 1/4 kids in my 10th grade graduation tom get the letter, and due to my behaviour I pissed ALL the idiots who bullied me off. I was "too pretty to be a nerd" "too smart to be pOpUlAr".

so I made a group of misfits, who are all highly intelligent, creative and my group had the ONLY gay male in the school AND THIS IS BEFORE YOU FUCKING RETARDS MADE IT "COOL". he was bullied badly, so fuck you, you fucks claim "liberalism" but I bet you were the type of idiot who bullied guys like him in high school while you pretended to like my chemical romance and fake cut yourselves. I hate you all, forever.

my grade was full of idiots who were fake emo, who left the scene the moment the scene changed to dub-step and club music. I was there, watching you all, like sonny Moore, went from FFTL to that dubstep skrillex shit he started in 2009.

I dated you, hooked up with you and I went to your gigs. I know who was real and who was fake. I met some of you years later and realised the more emotive ones were the less "alternative appearing".

I can say 1/10000 emo guys from the 00s were genuinely Into the music and scene for the right reasons based on my dating history and this can and will be analysed statistically using SPSS one day to prove a lot. I've had too many relationships from each sub-culture and I have had 4-11 males at a time per public "output" of my energy pursue me over life.

I'm not being cocky when I say I have a long line of "suitors" and its banked back about 50 men. it's been a thing I've avoided as it seems to grow based on my body shape, attitude, appearance, so I am currently out of touch with dating scenes, no interest to try that ANYWAY, given the fact that I have had so many LONG TERM relationships ANYWAY. I can't see another one going well, and at this case, I'm living with an ex but we never went on conventional and now our families label this 3 things: "asexual", "polyamorous" and "open relationship". I'm also "bisexual" but this all to humans outside, looks ridiculous on paper. (wild orgies and lots of swinging or some stupid sex magick probably is what J brother literally thinks we do).

bc humans are intrinsically designed to need to label things they don't understand. we share a lease, not a relationship, and fucking polyamorous, I WISH. there are no girl-girl-guy 3 some, or orgies, or sex magic parties.

this has changed the attitude and perception of this "relation' which Is non-romantic, non-sexual. he can date and likely, will, as can I , and I likely won't date.

I would say 14/15 have had ADHD, or other mental illness and or trauma. which means to me, nothing at all.

I think this "open book" non romantic relationship style of "friends and roommates" not sexual.

attachment is misunderstood by others but works well fro my adhd, meaning I'm not expected to marry, or be a wife in any capacity. he is free to do what he wants, as I am, and open communication is a novel frontier I brought into this in the start, and stayed with for the duration. we fight, but I fight with a lot of people in my life over many petty things. also down to my adhd, I believe, I have rejection sensitive dysphoria, which makes me hypersensitive to rejection, perceived or real.

im not sure if this is trauma or adhd or both. but

I have used sexuality as a weapon in many relationships but it cannot or will not be used here, so I have had to resort to uncovering parts of myself which I never knew, which will stay with me even if he decided to marry and wife up in 5 years, which I'm okay and expecting him to do, and I would much rather that then be trapped in a situation where I cannot be that "wife/mother archetype" as I'm too "femme fatal/other-woman/sex-laced seductress and siren" a "FWB, unicorn, drug buddy, hook-up where im a therapist" or "intellectual and cognitive mind-bender work-study obsessed woman".

both at once and many types of human, including one who is a full-time ceremonial magician of 7 years. I will drink, drug, fuck, fight like males and still be more feminine and high maintenance than 89% of women. I grew up a tomboy and don't mind getting into fun, adventure based situations, like hiking, or anything adrenaline, I would only be reluctant to eat weird shit.

I also have many "neurological" issues including ADHD, and trauma which causes a rupture in the average human and I dating.

I'll tell you how many men have said "you are the unicorn" and then realised what that means, I went as far as canvasing the PUA world back in 2014 after reading the game, a book on PUA, which is essentially, pick up artistry, based on NLP and hypnosis. I did this after reading the copy my ex in 2008 handed me before we dated saying "I gave this up for you". it took me years to open the book, buy when I did I truly believed the only way I would fall in love again, was through PUA. that failed in so many ways but gave me a training foundation for men who were candidates for that, I have trained up J, and the way that sounds is BAD. I know, but I got a lot of value myself, I just don't see it how I wanted to see it.

but that was my original intent, and I achieved this he knows that, knew it was happening and evolved for the best self.

I am thinking we can modulate this into a business model for how I was operating in the BDSM world was mainly psychological, not physical.

I get told all of is incredibly intimidating (I am told) to women and men.

I don't really care anymore, because people have always seen this part of me in the wrong way ANYWAY, but I own who I am NOW. which is what I needed ANYWAY. so it cannot be stolen again, and sexual healing has come from abstinence ironically.

I also don't care what or who is trying to tear up my relations, toxic or not toxic, all people around me will be on a healing journey by default, or cut out of my life, for I am radiating that energy so brightly its impossible NOT to feel that pull.

I will drag your shadows into the light, and make your secrets spin from your lips into my consciousness. its not what I do but its what is design.

I make your weaknesses mountains to climb over. you cannot hide from these in my presence, I won't be this controlling or obsessive female who wants 24-7 attention as I have a life full of meaning without love or sex. I don't want to be wined, dined or expensively gifted, unless specially requested.

I don't want love letters or romantic declarations, this isn't some femnazi bullshit, but it triggers me. I appreciate the efforts and won't make you feel bad about your insecurities, for mine are probably 30 x more pronounced.

I appreciate small things, that most males won't or don't know how to do. like remembering things I've said and being thoughtful. or knowing my silence isn't personal, or a game, but a protective wall. I've had songs sung too me, guitars played, songs written, or things made in ways that are heartfelt. but I've always had them used against me too. so it is the context. I value time, energy, conversations of depth and reciprocal exchange. I also value trauma understanding, my alters and fragments being accepted and valued as me as a whole and a person who is not afraid, or scared of stupid stuff like sensitivity, emotions, feelings as raw as my own. men feel intensely too, lol.

but will only give oral sex 100 times before I don't recieve it, I can communicate now so that wouldn't happen.

but I won't be a bitch about this stuff. I am extremely feminine and care in ways other people, do not, I forget nothing people tell me, so it can be a reward or reverse uno card pull in a fight, but I am not evil or deviant in my relations. I react, depending on how you treat me. I don't need your money, or providing source of income to be okay as I am my own queen, however sharing resources is okay to build something. I don't need to be seduced, but will need to be shown a person is trustworthy.

few cross that.

that will always be time-endurance and testing. there are ground rules I don't play with, or play games. or like being forced or forged into something I'm not. I know abusive and I know safe, and I am a psychology expert, trained psychotherapist and study humans for fun, so I'll always be analysing things.

and I know red flags and I know ego, I know how to placate and please and pleasure, but will only do so, for a bigger and better reason than the mere act of seduction. which is without value and transactional to someone like me, I won't lie.

and I know every tactic in the book, for the book was written by someone like me, many lives ago, and my karma is being burnt for that book.

in terms of walls, I have many, may it be called a maze. or labrnyth.

I will teach you things you never thought you'd know, and change your life in ways you won't ever be able to go back to before. I will blow your mind, sexually, emotionally, intellectually, on all levels, and I'll make your friends and family love me.

I'll bring your walls down and you won't be able to understand this, because you don't understand me, and thats ok.

but I'll always understanding you and make your life better because thats what I do anyway, and people talk to me about things I will never share, as I keep secrets. I am jealous, of everything but, only because I am attached in a disorganised way, and working on that.(I won't even mention how man women or men don't know basic psychology of themselves). I also am a therapist , for my friends and family too.i should not be , but I am. I care, I listen, If you think I'm not listening, I'm still listening. sometimes I interrupt, because I have ADHD and I am horrible at resolute planning, or being "normal". but I don't want to be normal anyway. I need you to recognise and understand my shit, for that is what I do for everyone in my life, and I have helped more than I receive.

I'll probably accidentally give you therapy, but thats fine, because you will uncover your depths and find meaning in this. it's not something that goes bad unless you are fundamentally, evil, even the most abusive relationship I was in, was benefited from this process. yes he's still narcissistic, but he is self-aware. and did I benefit, never, just know the anatomy of self-proclaimed narc and I still can't hate him. will get my civil claim one day.

I will fuck your mind without meaning too. but thats because I fuck my own mind. but the meaning is made in the man- some find this highly offensive or personal (its not). I fuck minds by my own overthinking, or over perception on many levels of reality. so join the ride, or don't come along at all. because once the rollercoaster is in motion, I have no control of what may or may not happen. it's purely experimental.

I am experimental.

and the women who are judging me, are not any better.

look within, and shut the fuck up. self-improve and quit this jealous divide and conquer bitchiness. I HATE gossip, bitches, snitches and fakers.

I look to other women who are intellectually, physically and spiritually "individual". and find value in superior status to my own, which is something my narcissistic ex taught me.

I look for mentors, and teachers and people who will teach me how to improve myself, which I am fearful to reconnect after something is amazing and I can't give anything back of positive value. I am sorry I am working on that.

I won't devalue those below me, but I also need to be mutually benefiting from a relationship.

I dont drag people down, I may disappear if I feel I am doing this by mistake. I am flakey as fuck, and sorry for that. its anxiety and lack of perfectionism, so I am wrong and bad for this. I can change. will change.

if you can find value with my relation, personal professional or romantic, we can move into a symbiotic beneficial agreement based on mutual "terms". but many won't or cannot see this, nor do I impose my bullshit into the lives of randoms at this age.

I don't care if this is cruel, it's real.

I value loyalty, compassion, self-insight/awareness, someone who understands all parts-spirituality, metaphysics while still having intellectual & logical & analytical brain-sight.

I enjoy music, magick and learning new things.

I do not care about appearances I dont think ive dated based on one time. I do value connections and chemistry which is far-few between, I hate fakers. I smell insincerity miles away. but I do respect women who are well-presented, or beautiful, with hair beauty and makeup, I can't do this shit well, so I look up to those who are in professions who do it like art. I find them to be genius level queens who scare me.

I call out bad behaviour and make people uncomfortable if they are repressed. I will change you without even meaning too, I don't even need to date you. its just my presence, over time, amplified by the intensity of the dynamics.

I don't want simplicity, but I also don't need over complexity.

I value passion, independence, creativity, curiosity, problem-solving, deep-disscussions, shared adventures and some occasional risk-taking (lol), sensuality and sexuality for a common cause beyond physical pleasure. I like being taught but not micromanaged. I need my own independence, and need to be trusted with that. I hate being scolded for that like a child, or being pushed to change my ways to conform to societal values. which I will push back and refuse to do. which is not healthy. I don't adult like many others do, but I try to proceed in other ways. and learn to adult like normal people, accept me.

I also value myself, and how I can be celebrated, enhanced and improved vs. the opposite.

I give space, and have boundaries, and understand human psychology, sexuality and relationships in ways few others unless they are trained, can do.

I value MY time. so you can have space to value YOURS. I dont need to be in anyones pocket for a long time. I love being alone, and being around people who are stimulating, but draining people will be drained out of my life quicker than I intend. I am sorry for the people who felt I disappeared, when I was only trying to be 'fair', if I feel I'm a bad influence, I will work on myself until I'm not. I'm still working on it.

I also use this psychology awareness, to enhance communication, connection. you may or may not become an accidental guinea pig. I will be upfront that I am experimental, but that is part of the buy ticket and take the ride. lets work together. not apart.

I am coming from a place of love, and love is what I feel for my animals, which you will be adopting as children.which I want to stop experiments being done on. I love love, in all ways, but hate cruelty of animals and children, violence and suffering. I dont advocate justice, because I find life is fucking cruel, unfair and unjust. by default, so I focus on myself. what can be changed, and what I am able to do in my own locus on control. I will always find myself drawn to the outsiders, the misfits, the vagabonds, the misunderstood. I want to help people who are society, or socially, disadvantaged by trauma and mental illness, but only when I have ability to help myself.

it's a journey.

I will not date anyone who is cruel to animals, outside of specify magical sacrifice, there is not any place for that. nor will I date or fraternise with anything or anyone linked or associated with pedophilia. I won't judge anyone on anything that are outside animal cruelty and pedophilia. I don't and haven't. I keep on good terms with every ex, bar 1 whom I only apologised too this year. it felt good to do that. I change my behaviour.

I am open, but also highly attuned to both logical, factual, empirical , scientific worlds, and spiritual, intuitive, psychic and the "collective unconscious". I walk in both these realms, and I am "conventionally attractive". which puts a lot of pressure on me, to be "stupid". I am always dumbing myself down to fit into normality, but I look ridiculous if I do that so I peacock my intellect.

only to be misconceived.

I give up because I no longer care how anyone but MYSELF can see ME. I won't dumb myself down , but I can enhance you UP. prepare yourself for graded education, evolution and self-growth on mass scales.sorry not sorry.

that sucks for the people who want to be living vicariously through me, for making up to lost trauma years, for family who sold me out for the success I'd bring home, or fake trauma enmeshed friends, or whatever they want or need from me. I value my time and energy, and have given that in abundance, and if you want to be with nut only "one part of me that is alters". I can't provide that now. not sorry.

I have to work on something or not be in a dynamic at all.

I no longer can switch on demand to adapt for you, it will not be effective and that upsets a lot of people. especially now I'm sober. harder to handle this, as I see the world for its ways and why it is, more vividly. I haven't had alcohol for almost 2 months, although, I could drink, I haven't.

I can't do it, anymore. it, being, faking, my selves fronting to impress. I can't. I have no more left to give, and I'm expected by everyone to be a way I can't do it in the way they want.

I will go to another year long outpatient DBT, followed by 10 weeks of A-C-T therapy, and however many ECT OR TMS may or may not help. I'm told it won't (ect) work. but TMS, is something I am open too. but I am telling you, none of this psychotherapy, that will be based on dbt skills, day therapy, intensive skills training, recommencing my studying, and resuming "life worth living" will or can wipe the traumas I've "recovered" memories for.

I will also shut the fuck up, and tell nobody about this if you leave me alone, I told that to my family, and this is open letter to the watchers, stalkers and perps who read this openly as I track the hits on here and have 200+ visits a day every day for the last month. globally. no idea how or who you are but I think its the same people who called the police for the "ayreon song lyrics" seen to be a suicide not last October.

thanks for that wake up call, I have shut the fuck up, since December, more so now. I will burn the journals, or lock them up.

my recovery is not linear, not yet fully integrated and I trust nobody so I don't think my psychotherapy will be deep, I focus on things like ADHD AND my EDNOS. and dbt skills. I won't be talking about sexual traumas.

enjoy the update, and thanks for the "attention".

I have my goals, my work, my meaning and what my life should and could and will look like, but I will not share that with anyone. that means everyone right now.

I've been tested, traumatised and terrorised to the point of not-tolerant of anyone who may bring that back, and banish the fuck out of my sphere every moment I need.

take me as I am, or watch me as I go, which I will go, where I am not wanted I will remove myself, but I will find where I am celebrated because I create that.

I will rise up against all adversity every time but that is survival and that created a resilient and brave woman, in me. who will not be destroyed or decomposed by humans who are fundamentally fucking evil.

I gift you my truth, in progression, and give up the pain of the past.

[peterthepark]

Princess

Steve Harrington x Reader

Summary: He’s seen her around the campus - a polite and quiet girl, who unmistakably happened to be very close friends with Billy Hargrove. But the more Steve gets to know her, he realizes that there’s a completely different person underneath that shy facade of hers. 

Warnings: smutty content, cursing, fluff, some angst, DADDY STEVE, more than 5k words

A/N: Pure filthy fun and fiction. Enjoy! 

It’s Thursday when Steve Harrington finally shows up to class. His hair is a mess, falling in matted waves against his forehead as he struggles to even out his breathing. Everyone is glaring at him because of his late and abrupt arrival. He leans against the doorframe of the busy classroom, flashing the professor a charming smile as he attempts to casually waltz in.

Steve takes the empty seat beside you, pulling out the chair with a sharp screech that makes him comically cringe. You look over to him, smiling shyly as he scoots closer to the edge of the table. He meets your gaze, returning a tight-lipped smile in your direction before he takes out his notebook and pen, scribbling nonsense as the class picks up again.

However, you do catch him looking occasionally over your shoulder at some points during the lesson, and figured that he was having trouble keeping up with the speed of Mr. Cortez’s lecture - and so you decided to do what any other kind classmate would do. You slide your notebook over to Steve, not failing to notice the breath of relief he takes once he‘s able to successfully copy your notes without rush.

“Thanks.” He nudges you softly. “I was literally dying earlier. I mean, c’mon, I show up and suddenly he’s zooming through this thing.” He jokes, covering the side of his mouth as he whispers to you. “By the way, I’m Steve.”

“I’m Y/N.” Extending his other hand, you give it a polite shake before you turn back to the projector.

“You new here?” You take your notebook back, brushing your hair away from your face as you continue to write. “I don’t think I’ve seen you around that much.”

“Oh, I only come around to class on Thursdays. I have a few other classes that - that screwed up my schedule.” You chuckle, tapping your pen lightly against your hand. “Overloaded myself this year. College sucks.”

“Shame. This is the only class we have together, then.”

He can see your rosy blush despite the slight dim in the room. She’s pretty.

Steve bites his lip subconsciously when you look away with a mousy grin. He bumps your knee with his, before he continues. “It’d be nice to have you around. You’re cool. Uh, you’d be a cool study buddy, you know? Unless - unless you have one already? A study buddy?”

Damn, get it together.

“Study buddy?” You glance at him, shutting your notebook. You lean back into your chair. “That’d be nice. It’s - It’s real sweet of you, Steve. But I’m - I don’t really... I like to stick to myself with my studies.”

“Oh! Of course. Yeah, no problem.”

“No hard feelings?” You laugh, watching as he runs his hands through his hair.

“No hard feelings.”

Class is over by the time you and Steve are done speaking. He walks you down the hall towards Economics before you feel an arm wrap around your shoulder, tugging you slightly away from your newfound classmate turned friend.

“Y/N, I see you’ve met Steve Harrington.”

“Billy.” Steve gives him a nod, clenching his jaw at how the asshole of a guy pulls you closer towards him. Billy chews on a piece of bubblegum, smacking his lips together before he whispers something into your ear, to which you laugh at.

“Oh, Steve, yeah, this is - Billy’s a friend. I didn’t know you guys knew each other?”

“We go way back. High school.”

“That’s great!”

“Yeah, sure.” Steve replies, eyes trained on the ground. “Played him in basketball a few times. For sure the best players on the team. Although, don’t get me wrong, but he was a big piece of-“

He turns his head to look at you. But you aren’t there.

And that’s when he realizes that he’s walked past your Economics classroom.

Dumbass.

“Harrington, where you going?” Billy smiles viciously at him, following Steve down the hall with long, smooth strides.

“Just headed to the library. I’ve got a free period.” He rolls his eyes as Billy starts chuckling once more. “Okay, what’s funny, asshole?”

“You - you gotta stay away from Y/N.” Billy takes out a pack of cigarettes from his jacket, lighting one as he places it between his lips. “She’s a lot different than you’d think.”

“Jesus, I’ve just met her and you’re already hounding me about her? Chill out.” Steve scoffs. Unbelievable.

Fucking annoying.

“I’m warnin’ you, Harrington.” Billy glances behind him, looking in the direction of your classroom while he shakes his head. “She’s a player. She ain’t afraid to break hearts around here. Watch your back.”

Steve gives Billy a dirty look before he walks away again, pushing his shoulder to open the door to the library. It’s silent, as expected, and Steve is sure to walk around quietly. He sits down by the table in the back corner of the room, hidden away in the shelves of numerous books. Bored, he takes one into his hands, placing it down onto the table as he reads quietly. He can’t get you out of his mind. Although his eyes read over the words of the book, all he can think of is you - your voice, your hair, the aura of mysteriousness that you carried. Normally, Steve wouldn’t care to go after a girl as shy and as resigned, but something about you simply struck a place in his heart.

But, Billy’s apparent warning from earlier also sends him into a spiral of confusion. What could you have possibly done to cause Billy to tell him that? It seemed like you wouldn’t even hurt a fly - much more a person. Maybe Billy was just trying to have you all to himself, and that irritated Steve.

Unless you were dating each other.

It’s hard for him to imagine it - Billy Hargrove, the town asshole, with one of the sweetest girls that Steve has met. It’s all very strange. But it doesn’t stop Steve from wanting to be around you more. 

He hears faint footsteps approach him. He doesn’t think of it much, until he sees a stack of books drop onto the wooden table. He looks up, and he nearly jumps out of his seat. You smile at him as you sit down across from him, pushing your stuff aside before you take out your homework.

“Y/N, hey.” Steve says, surprised to see you so quickly. 

“Hey, Econ got cancelled. That’s why I’m here.” You shrug with one shoulder, resting your chin in the palm of your hand as you fix your gaze on the tiny lamp on the table. “Free period?” You ask him.

He nods, pursing his lips. Now, he’s able to finally get a good look at you under the harsh light. He wasn’t wrong before. You are pretty. Wisps of hair dangle against your face, coming loose from the modest ponytail that you had done earlier. There’s an innocent glimmer in your eyes, accompanied with another look that Steve can’t quite place.

He watches as you shift in your chair, tugging at the knitted fabric of your sweater. That’s when Steve sees the faint, red mark hidden in the juncture of your neck. He’d recognize that kind of blooming shade from anywhere.

A hickey?

Your lips turn up into a quick smirk, and it fades instantly before Steve can see it. You cross your legs over each other, bumping your knee softly against the hard wood of the table. 

“Well, uh, there’s this party tonight,” You start, licking your lips. Steve’s eyes flicker down to the motion. “Billy and I are gonna be there with a bunch of other people from our year. I... I think it’d be nice to see you there.” 

Steve didn’t take you as the type of person to party even though he had just started talking to you.

But, really? You? A sweet, smart girl partying with Billy and other classmates?

It was a little crazy and surprising to think about. He considers your offer for a second, knowing that he hasn’t been to a college party since last year. Even more, he hasn’t been hanging out with anyone new recently - other than Robin and a few other mutual friends, who fortunately, also got into the same school as him. Though, for once, Steve just wants to be a regular, college kid - partying, hooking up with girls, or regretfully getting hungover before an exam day. There’s a voice in the back of his mind that urges him not to go, to focus on studying and finish the essay that he needs to turn in before Saturday night.

“Fuck it.” He chuckles, gesturing a hand mindlessly. “I’ll see you there.”

You grin toothily.

“Can’t wait.”

-

Steve stares at the neon pink flyer in his hands. He runs a hand down his face, sighing as he places the paper onto his bed. He looks at himself in the mirror, readjusting the collar of his leather jacket. Suddenly, he feels a little self-conscious. He tugs his sunglasses over his eyes, running his hands through his hair with groans of frustration.

He‘s gonna have fun tonight. He promises himself.

There’s a loud, rhythmic knocking at his dorm when he finally puts his shoes on.

“It’s open!”

The door clicks, and Robin peers into the room with a suggestive face. “You going to the party?”

“Yeah, aren’t you?” He tilts his head at her. A purple masquerade mask covers her eyes, while her freckles peek out from beneath.

“Of course I am, dingus. I’m trying to have fun tonight.” She chuckles, moving out of the way so Steve can shut the the door behind him. They walk down the bustling hall of boys, who also seem to be dressing up for the party. “I can’t believe you’re wearing shades...” She flicks the frame, rolling her eyes when Steve lets out a yelp. “...To a masquerade party. Literally. You’re lame.”

“I’m not lame!” He raises his eyebrows at her, wagging his finger before they leave the dormitory. The air is cool, blowing a light breeze through Steve’s hair. “These shades are - they’re cool, okay? They’re Ray-Bans, c’mon. Anyways, who are you tryin’ to impress?”

“I’m not impressing anybody. I’m impressing myself.” He shares a knowing look with her, biting the inside of his mouth. “Fine, fine. I’ll actually be honest. There’s this girl that everyone’s been talking about-“

“Oh! So she’s popular? Okay, I can get with that.” Steve pushes at her shoulder, throwing his head back with a laugh as she tries to push him, too. “Sorry! Sorry! What’s her name?”

“Literally nobody knows. She has - she’s like some mystery girl around campus with like multiple aliases. I don’t know.” Robin shrugs, eyes twinkling with wonder. “Maybe she’s into girls. Maybe, you know?”

And Steve nods with understanding.

There’s some part of him who wants to have fun and hang out with potential hook-ups. But also, he really doesn’t want to look for other girls. He wants to genuinely hang out with you, to get to know you better, to actually talk out of class and without Billy getting in his way.

After all, you did invite him to the party - which must’ve meant something, right?

Steve and Robin push past the masses of people - students and graduates alike fill the big house, each holding red solo cups or a can of beer. It’s loud and reeks of liquor, as expected from a party. Def Leppard plays through the speakers by the DJ booth, while people dance and grind around in the living room. There’s a pool outside, where older students push each other into the water and play beer pong.

Steve doesn’t deny the fact that he’s missed going to parties. High school was different, but college - it was something else. It’s wild, fun, and nobody really gives a shit about what anyone’s doing. He bobs his head along to the music, still sticking with Robin as they make their way to the kitchen. There’s cheers and hoots, and Steve runs into a bunch of friendly classmates.

“Frankie! What’s up, man?” Steve rejoices, bumping fists with his old dorm buddy. They start to chat with one another, catching up on the latest happenings in each other’s lives before Frankie - as usual - brings up something about dating and sex.

“Dude, you’ve heard about that girl, right?” Frankie pours Steve a drink, passing him the cup of alcohol.

“Which one? There’s a lot of girls here.” Glancing around the room, he chuckles. Was he talking about the one that Robin had brought up earlier? “Oh, wait! Is it - is it that girl, the one with like no name? Nobody knows her? But she goes here?”

“Yes! Fuck, yes!” Frankie pumps his fists into the air, beer sloshing over the rim of his cup. “Hottest chick I have ever seen. God, she’s supposed to show up tonight. She literally never misses a good party. She’s crazy, brother. This is why I’ve always invited you to the parties, Steve! This - this girl! Have you even seen her?” Steve shakes his head, feeling a bit overwhelmed from Frankie’s sudden burst of energy. “Man, you’ve gotta - you are missing out.”

Maybe Frankie has had a little too much to drink.

It isn’t long before Steve is on the dance floor with Robin. Alcohol pumps through their veins as they jump around and shout, taking gulps from their something-number cup of beer. Steve can barely hear his voice anymore over the booming bass, and he’s sure that he’s probably lost it from how loud he’s been drunkenly screaming the lyrics of certain songs.

However, Steve feels his chest tighten from how cramped the room is as more people begin to flood in. He lets Robin know that he’ll be outside, and steps out onto the deck by the pool - finally getting some much needed fresh air.

“Steve!” He turns with a look of surprise, shifting into laughter when he sees Penny Kramer - a friend that he had met through one of his previous classes. He pulls her into a quick hug, instantly hitting it off into a conversation about the party.

“Oh, yeah. I’m having so much fun.” He tosses his empty cup into the trash, before he leans onto the deck railing. A thought passes through his head, and he swallows before speaking, “Hey, uh, really weird question.”

“All ears.” Penny replies, taking a drag from her cigarette.

“By any freakin’ chance, do you happen to know anyone named Y/N?”

Penny bursts out into a long chuckle, blowing a puff of smoke into the night air. “Oh, Y/N? Such a nice girl. Too nice. Kinda freaks me out sometimes. But yeah, I do know her. Why?”

“She invited me here tonight. I haven’t seen her at all. Was hoping to hang out with her, but... she’s not here.”

“She invited you?” She stops, tapping her cigarette. “What the actual fuck? That’s so weird.”

“What? Why?”

“She never invites people to parties. Hell, let alone ever show up to one.” Steve furrows his eyebrows, burying his hands in his pockets as he scoffs. “Seems like she stood you up, bud. Sorry, I guess.”

“And she’s friends with Billy Hargrove? He’s an asshole? And she’s like a really sweet and quiet girl? How do you explain that?” He should’ve known that you wouldn’t have come. But why the hell did you invite him in the first place? To embarrass him? Leave him hanging?

“Now that... that I can’t explain. Maybe they’re like study buddies or something. She probably tutors the damn idiot, Steve.”

Study buddies. Funny.

Suddenly, collective shouts ring from the living room as the loud roar of a motorcycle echoes through the neighborhood.

Curiously, Steve makes his way back inside with Penny, along with other groups of students who seemed drawn to the sudden attention. He finds Robin in the crowd, tugging on her shoulder to ask what the ruckus was about.

“It’s her.” She says, not bothering to look back at Steve. Everybody turns to the front door, and Steve can just squint out the sight of a group of people approaching the house.

“Who?”

The music kicks up as soon as they walk in. Billy Hargrove, along with a few other people, stride inside. As always, Billy carries a smug smirk, sporting a leather jacket to go on top of his bare chest. He’s got a cigar between his fingers, laughing about as people begin to talk to him and greet him.

But Steve doesn’t give a flying fuck about Billy.

Instead, his attention shifts over to the girl who has Billy’s arm slung around her shoulders. A blue bobbed wig sits on her head, along with an ornate mask that covers the upper half of her face. Her lips are painted bloody red, while she shows a cocky grin. She’s barely dressed as well - wearing a flashy top accompanying the fish-net tights underneath her short skirt. It’s also as if Steve can hear the sound of her high-heeled boots click onto the hardwood floor.

Immediately, he knows who she is.

The mystery girl that everyone seemed to be whispering about.

And now, he realizes why she’s the talk of the town.

She kisses Billy on the cheek, giggling when she realizes she’s left a lipstick stain on his skin. The people in the room start to separate as her and Billy strut deeper into the house, before stopping in the middle of the makeshift dance floor.

Robin whispers something to Steve, but frankly, he doesn’t hear her.

Because mystery girl seems to have locked eyes with him.

Her blue wig glitters under the disco lights, and Steve can barely make out the color of her natural hair beneath it. The party picks up again, only this time, it’s much louder and crazier than before. Mystery girl hasn’t broken eye contact with him, even though Billy starts to kiss up her neck and grope at her hips.

Who is she?

Steve tries not to get affected by her. Him and Robin decide to sit on the staircase, taking a break from all the heavy partying.

“I’m gonna have a killer hangover tomorrow.” Robin mumbles, falling into Steve’s shoulder. “Dude, I’m so wasted. Holy shit.”

“Yeah, me fucking too.”

He looks over the crowd. He can see the blue head of hair from a mile away. She has her arms hooked around Billy’s neck, making out with him amongst everyone else. She pulls away, before whispering something in his ear. Steve shuts his eyes for a second, only to miss out on how mystery girl pointed in his direction and Billy looked.

“I’m gonna throw up.”

Steve winces as Robin hurls loudly into the toilet. He sits against the shower curtain, massaging his temples as he waits for a minute of peace. Because Robin - poor girl - is literally still spilling out her guts into the toilet. She takes a deep breath, flushing away the disgusting contents before she collapses against the sink cabinet with an exaggerated groan.

“I wanna die. This is terrible. Why are people doing this to themselves?” She scoffs, burying her face in her arms as she brings her knees to her chest.

“At least you’re already sobering up. I can still - I’m still a bit doozy.” Steve chuckles, rubbing his eyes. “God, is that - girl with blue wig... she’s the girl?”

Robin nods, voice muffled as she speaks into her arm. “Yeah. She’s always wearing a mask to parties and that wig so nobody - nobody really knows what she looks like. But I’m sure she’s beautiful. And hot. She’s probably hot.”

Steve chuckles, before he stands to help Robin to her feet. “C’mon, let’s ruin our lives some more. Make the most out of this damn party.”

That’s how Steve ends up by the keg stand.

Chugging and chugging and chugging.

He feels adrenaline soar through his veins. Beer trickles down his shirt when he pulls away, while Robin and the people around him cheer happily for his new record.

However, his glorious ‘King Steve’ moment is stolen when Billy and Mystery Girl enter the kitchen, possibly drunk off their minds.

“Harrington! Finally fuckin’ showed up, huh?” Billy punches Steve’s shoulder, biting his tongue when he sees him wobble over. “Fucking lightweight.”

“Hey, back off, dickhead.” Robin steps in front of Steve, slurring her words as she snarls spitefully at him. Pulling him away from Billy, she glances at Steve with reassurance before she ushers him to the less-crowded backyard.

If Steve wasn’t drunk before, he certainly is now.

“God, so much for ruining your life.” She scoffs at her friend. She sits him down in a plastic chair. “I’m gonna get us water and some food. Cool down, alright?”

Steve can only nod, and Robin disappears back into the house party with hasty steps. She bumps into Mystery Girl, apologizing profusely with blushing cheeks.

Her wig bounces as she wraps her arms around her chest, shielding her skin from the chilly air. There’s an empty seat next to Steve, and she gestures at it as if to ask if it were taken. She sits down, crossing her legs together.

“You’re pretty big around here.” Steve pipes up, feeling a bit nervous to be around the ‘myth’ herself. He immediately wishes he hadn’t spoke when she quirks a brow at him. 

“Really?”

The voice sounds almost familiar, but Steve can’t place where he’s heard it before. She sounds slightly strained, as if she were speaking in a pitch that isn’t her regular voice. Steve looks over at her, eyes trailing down her neck and down her chest. He shakes himself out of his trance, knowing that he shouldn’t be looking at her like that.

But he can’t help it with the way she chews on her lip.

“Yeah, everyone - everyone thinks you’re-“

“Hot? Pretty? Sexy?” She chuckles, glancing down at her freshly manicured nails. “Trust me, I’ve heard it all.”

She reeks of confidence. Steve would be lying if he said that he wasn’t attracted to her. She seemed straight out of a movie.

A fantasy.

“You’re with Billy Hargrove, then? How’s that? Must be some...” He scoffs, clasping his hands together as he leans forward in the chair. “... some power couple, yeah?”

Mystery Girl cackles loudly. Her hand comes up to cover her mouth, and Steve can’t help but smile. Her masked eyes twinkle in the night, while the water of the pool reflects ethereally onto her outstretched legs.

“Oh, Billy wishes that I was his girl.” She sighs, before she finally looks over to Steve. For a second, he thinks he recognizes the face beneath the mask, but she turns her head away again before he can mention it. “I like to ride solo. There’s nothing better than - than being free to do the shit I wanna do. Being with Billy would only tie me down.”

“Of course. Someone like you... I’m sure you have lots of - of, uh, fun.”

“Met anyone nice tonight, Steve?”

What?

“I’ve actually been look - wait, how do you... how do you know my name?”

“Uh, you mentioned it to me earlier.” She flips her hair over her shoulder nervously.

She doesn’t let Steve see the faulty break in her wall.

“Did I?” He narrows his eyes at her. She nods confidently. “Damn, I really must’ve had too many fucking drinks. Jesus.”

“It’s a party. Have fun. You’re supposed to get drunk.” She utters, waving her hands about. “When’s the last time you’ve done some stupid shit?”

Steve exhales, closing his eyes in thought. “I don’t know. Uh, maybe... maybe the summer after high school graduation? Got into a fight with this...” He shakes his head with disbelief, before continuing. “... this Russian guy.”

“That’s hot.”

Her and Steve exchange another round of laughter. She uncrosses her legs, smoothing down her skirt against her thighs with the palms of her hands. She pushes her hair away from her cheeks, licking her lips.

Steve is hooked.

And he’s desperate to know who she is.

“What’s your name?”

She huffs, turning in her chair towards him. “You really think I’d tell you that?”

“Well, you know my name. I just think that...” His gaze flickers down to the hickey on her neck. His cheeks heat up, before his whole body starts to feel warmer. “I just think that it’s only fair that you tell me yours.”

She opens her mouth, hesitating for a split second.

“You can call me Princess.”

Steve gulps audibly. His jaw clenches momentarily and he feels a rush of sensation in his body.

Princess.

“That’s hot.” Steve jokes, earning another smile from her.

“Do you wanna get out of here?” She stands from the chair, holding a hand out towards Steve.

“And do what exactly?”

“Just stupid shit.”

-

Steve gasps as he is pushed against the door of his dorm. His hand cups Princess’ cheek as he kisses her deeply. Their breaths are heavy as Steve takes off his jacket, letting it fall to the floor. He steps forward, letting his hands roam all over the expanse of her back as he traps her against a wall. Her blue hair tickles his nose as he goes to suck on her neck, leaving an angry red love bite.

“Fuck...” She whispers, watching intently as Steve rids her of her shirt and lacy bra. Her mouth falls open as he cups her breasts, squeezing them softly in his hands before he leans down and takes a nipple between his plump lips. She chuckles, running her nails through his thick hair. “You’re wearing too many clothes.” She pushes him away for a minute before she tugs his shirt over his head.

Princess slings her arms behind Steve’s neck, pulling him into another messy, hurried kiss. Her lipstick is smeared all over his mouth, traces of it littering the length of his neck. Steve reaches behind her to cup her ass, moaning into her shoulder before he unzips her skirt. He curses when he sees her lack of underwear, and the fact that she was only wearing the fishnet tights for the entirety of the party. She’s taken by surprise when Steve grips her face, bumping noses with her as his lips ghost over hers. He parts his lips as he watches her tongue poke out from the corner of her mouth.

“Shit, look at you.” He brushes her hair away from her eyes, still hidden by the mask. He tries to hold back a moan when her leg brushes against the bulge in his jeans, and he places a hand on the wall beside her face to stop himself from stumbling over. “I’m so fucking hard, Princess. Fuck.” He gasps when she repeats the motion, but Steve catches her wrist the next time she does it. “Can I... can I taste you?”

She whimpers loudly, nodding with furrowed eyebrows. Steve takes her by the arm, guiding her to sit down on his bed. She yelps out of surprise when he pushes the back of her knees over her head. He rips the fishnet tights apart, moaning when he sees how wet she’s become. He sinks to the floor, pulling her to the edge of the bed before his tongue delves deeply between her sweet folds.

“Steve!” She sits up on her elbows, face contorted into a mix of pleasure and relief. Steve locks eyes with her, chuckling.

His mouth feels divine. But his goddamn tongue...

Shit.

The ridge of his nose brushes against her clit. And Steve feels himself twitch in his pants at the way her back was arching. His hands wrap themselves around her thighs, pushing her legs farther back onto the bed before he’s replacing his mouth with his long fingers. He pumps them in and out at a quick pace, collecting her juices once he pulls them out of abruptly.

“Jesus...” Steve shakes his head, undoing his belt. Princess crawls forward, tearing Steve’s hands away from himself as she unbuttons his jeans at an expert pace. Princess laughs at the state of his lips - swollen and wet and definitely sweet.

Suddenly, Steve is the one on the bed - clothes are strewn all over the room, hanging from ridiculous places as Princess lays between his parted thighs. She takes him into her mouth, humming. Her wig bounces as she pushes him into the back of her mouth, gagging once her mask brushes against his pubic bone. She pulls herself off of him, saliva dripping down her chin as she tries to catch her breath. Her hands twist around his length, jerking him off quickly while she bounces on her calves. Steve throws his head back against his pillow, groaning quietly as Princess moves to hover above his hard cock. But before she can sink down onto him, Steve flips them over, so that her torso is buried into the mattress while her ass is in the air.

“Do you have a condom?” She breathes out. 

Steve swiftly opens the drawer in his nightstand. He rips the packet open with his teeth, groaning as he rolls the latex onto his erection. He’s panting, running a hand through his messed-up hair before he finally gains the air to speak. “Do you want this?” Princess nods silently, pushing her ass back at him teasingly. “Tell me to stop. I’ll do it right now.”

“No, I want it. Steve, just fuck me alr-” She chokes on her words as Steve pushes his dick inside her, placing his hands on her hips. He’s smirking at her silence, knowing damn well that her cockiness and bratty demeanor was just an act. “Daddy...” She whispers into the sheets, fisting the material.

Steve moans filthily. He leans over to grab a fistful of her hair, pulling her back carefully to brush his lips against her ear. “What’d you call me?”

“Daddy.” She giggles, biting her lip when she decides to look into his eyes. She gasps when Steve lets go of her hair, letting her fall against the mattress without care as he starts to pound into her.

“Keep calling me that. Fuck.” He thrusts into her, screwing his eyes shut at the pleasure that he was feeling. He’s flush against her, mouth agape as his dick slams in and out of her.

“So good, daddy. I love it.” She glances back at him, flashing the small butterfly tattoo on the back of her neck when she moves her hair away. 

It isn’t long before Steve is pinned onto the bed, while Princess bounces on top of him - tits in face and everything. Steve has never done anything as dirty as this, and he feels his abdomen tighten as she leans back, placing her hands on his thighs as she rides him sensually.

“Princess...” He bites his lip, bucking his hips up to thrust into her pussy with choked moans. “You gonna cum? You gonna cum for - for daddy? Shit...”

“Yes! Yes!” Her legs quiver as she reaches her orgasm, and she falls against Steve’s chest with loud pants. Steve sits up, hooking his arm around her waist before he pounds harder into her. The sound of skin slapping against skin rings throughout the dorm room, and Steve’s glad that he doesn’t have a roommate. Princess pulls his hair, and Steve places a hand around her neck before he’s sent to the edge. He thrusts out of her, sliding the condom off before he’s covering her tits and stomach with strings of his cum. 

He stops to catch his breath, resting his cheek against Princess’ chest in exhaustion. “Fuck, that was so good.” She toys with the little tufts of hair at his neck, leaning down to kiss his cheek before she leaves the warmth of his lap. 

She combs at her blue wig with her fingers, sighing when she swings her legs over Steve’s bed. There’s a hesitancy in her voice, but Steve is too hazy to hear it. “Do you have a bathroom?”

He nods to the bathroom in the corner of his dorm - it’s super tiny, with only a toilet and sink, but it’s enough for Princess to freshen up. She collects her clothes from off the floor, before locking the bathroom door behind her. Steve grabs a fresh pair of boxers from his closet, before going to rest on his bed to wait for her to return. He shuts his eyes, placing a forearm over his head.

The last thing he hears before he falls asleep is the click of a door, and a muffled ‘thanks.’

-

“Steve.”

He groans, rolling over onto his back. The room becomes brighter as his curtains are pulled apart, bringing him to a state of anger at the sudden disruption.

“Steve.”

“What?” He mumbles, clutching his pillow under his arm. Lazily, he lifts his head towards the sound of his voice, and his eyes bulge out of his head. “Robin? What the fuck are you-“ He tightly wraps his sheets against his bare chest, scooting up till his back hits the headboard of his bed.

A pang of nausea hits him, and he’s immediately reminded of the amount of alcohol he drank last night. Still wrapped in a sheet, he sprints to the bathroom, nearly tripping over his own feet as he vomits into the toilet. He mewls dramatically when he feels the throbbing pain in his forehead. Slowly, he makes his way back to his spot on the bed with hooded eyes.

“Put some clothes on, you dingus.” Robin makes a face at him, tossing him some from his closet. Steve grunts as he slips into the fresh clothing, struggling to get into his shirt from how sore his whole body feels.

“What happened last night?” He asks, voice hoarse and laced with sleepiness.

“Dude, you ditched me!” Robin frowns at him, crossing her arms over her chest as she plops down onto his study table. “You suck!”

“I didn’t ditch you! What - when did I ditch you?!” He panics, genuinely unable to think about the rest of last night. “Ro, all I remember is the keg stand and that’s it. That’s as far as - as my brain can go. Oh, my - I wasn’t drugged, was I? I must’ve been drugged. Holy shit, it’s that whole Russian thing all over again-“

“Steve! Hey!” Robin claps her hands, blinking at Steve with utter concern. “You were not drugged last night. But you were drunk off your ass!”

Steve literally doesn’t remember shit. He’s not kidding. Frankie. Penny. Beer. Keg stand. Mystery girl. That’s it.

Then a memory hits him from out of the blue. He snaps his fingers continuously, recollecting thoughts as he turns to look at Robin. “Does the name Princess ring a bell to you?”

“Princess? Are you still drunk?” She rolls her eyes at him, slapping the back of his head. “The only princess here is you, sleeping beauty.”

“Robin! I’m serious! I swear I... nevermind.” He facepalms his forehead, obviously frustrated with how last night’s events have gone over his head. “Fuck, how drunk did I get?” He rocks back and forth on his heels, nervously pulling at his hair.

“Steve. Listen.” Robin reaches over, squeezing his shoulder with a softer voice. “It’s okay. We’ll figure it out but...” She erupts into a chuckle, glancing around his dorm. “By the looks of this place... it seems like someone had a lotta fun last night.”

Surely enough, Steve’s place is messy. His clothes from the party are thrown all over the floor, along with a few pillows from his bed. There’s a condom wrapper on the floor, to which Robin gags at. 

But his gaze is drawn to the shimmering thread on his pillow.

He reaches for it, then realizing that his fingers were pinching at a strand of hair.

Blue.

“Is that...” Robin gasps, eyes widening when she takes the string of blue hair from Steve’s fingers. “Why the - what - no freaking way.”

“I have no idea what this is. What-“

“Steve. Mystery girl.” She dangles the strand in front of his face. “Did you take her here?”

Oh, fucking hell.

“Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Oh, my god!” He launches himself off the bed, pacing around in short circles. “There’s no... how...”

“Steve! Remember. Try to remember.”

Stupid shit. They did stupid shit.

“We hooked up.” He realizes. His eyes dart around the room, and all the memories come back to him in short pieces. “Her - She goes by Princess. That’s her name. And then - oh, my god. I had sex with her, Ro-“

“Calm down. She didn’t hurt you, did she?”

“No! Of course, not. I just - fuck!” Steve stops pacing. “Yo, what time is it?”

“Ten.”

“Shit!”

Steve ends up late to class. Again. For the second day in a row, Mr. Cortez gives him a disapproving nod, glaring daggers at Steve as he drags his feet shamefully to a empty chair. He looks over, realizing you are nowhere to be seen. It’s Friday, and Steve remembers that you only show up on Thursdays. Maybe it was for the best, not to see you till then, because Steve did feel a bit angry and saddened that you didn’t come to the party. He’s thrown off for the rest of the day - searching for someone who resembles Princess in the halls to get his mind off you. But he doesn’t know what he’s looking for, except a bright ass blue wig and possibly a flamboyant outfit.

It’s the following week when Steve is able to see you. He isn’t late, but in fact, he is very early. He can easily spot you in your navy turtleneck, and the bare beautiful face that he can’t help but stare at. He walks up to you quietly, unsure what to say. 

“Y/N.” He says, clearing his throat when he hesitantly sits down next to you. You seem surprised, and your eyes flash with pitiful embarrassment.

“Steve, listen, about - I can-“ You drop your pencil onto your notebook, gesturing at him with an ashamed voice.

“It’s fine, Y/N. It’s fine. Just... why invite me to the party if you weren’t planning on showing up?” He scoffs, looking down at his lap as he plays with his hands. “I wanted to hang out with you. I was - Y/N, I was so excited.” He rubs at his chin, shaking his head. “Genuinely.”

“Steve, I’m so sorry. I wanted to go. I just... I forgot I had other freaking plans and I had to stay home. I didn’t mean to - to flake on you.” You pause, before continuing with a shaky voice. “I invited you because I think you’re... shit - I think you’re cute, Steve. And I wanted to hang out with you, too.”

Steve looks up at you. “Actually? You think I’m cute?”

Blushing, you chuckle. “Yeah. I do. And you’re really nice to me.” There’s a hint of distrust in Steve’s body language - due to past experiences with dating and girls during high school. Slowly, he nods, taking in your unexpected words. “I totally get it if you don’t... I mean, we’ve only known each other for a week, probably less. But the party was a way for me to get to know you more. Out of school. I definitely missed out on not going.”

You send him a hopeful look. Your lips are pulled up into a struggling smile, obviously under pressure because of the situation. Your hands tremble on the desk. “Y/N,” Steve convinces himself that you probably were busy. Anyways, he didn’t know you that well, so who was he to distrust you right away? “You know what, let’s meet up later.”

“Yeah?” Instantly, you sit up straighter in your chair.

“Yeah. Let’s go to that coffee shop down the block. It’s my favorite. I think you’d like it.” He flashes a boyish smile at you. “I’ll pick you up?”

“Okay. Yes, of course.” You nod rapidly. Stuttering, you whip around the grab your notebook, tearing out a paper before you hurriedly scribble something down. “C-call me. Later. I mean. Before you pick me up.”

“Promise you won’t flake on me.”

“I promise.”

-

“Robin, what do I wear?” Steve tosses a pile of clothes onto his bed, clearly stressed as he places his hands on his hips.

“All of this shit is ugly.” She sputters into laughter, sorting through the clothes. “Where’s that jacket I gave you for Christmas?”

That’s how Steve ends up in a denim jacket with fur lining, sporting a white shirt underneath. He rubs his hands against his cuffed jeans, adjusting the black belt around his waist. He feels good. He looks good. He smirks at himself, before spraying a round of Farrah Fawcet into his hair.

“So, tell me about this Y/N!” Robin sits up on the bathroom counter, looking down at Steve with pure excitement. 

“She’s really pretty, and shy. Smart girl.” He chuckles, flicking the stubborn curl that wouldn’t leave his forehead. “I’m going in pretty blind. But hey, it’s a date. I’ll get to know her.”

Robin smirks, playing with her shoelace. “Well, look at you, Steve Harrington. Hooking up with the hottest girl on campus then scoring a date with a smart, gorgeous lady? You’ve gotta lend me some tips, dingus.”

“You don’t need any. Anyone would easily love you.” A friendly stare lingers between the two of them, before Steve huffs and slaps at Robin’s shoe. “Now get out of my room. I’m tryin’ to call Y/N.” 

After an awkward yet pleasant phone call with you, Steve drives himself over to your house. He’s nervous, but also eager - he hasn’t been on a proper date for a long time; he knew that he couldn’t find anyone more perfect than you to be his new first. He pulls into your driveway, tapping his fingers against his steering wheel as he stares up at your big house. Preparing himself, he takes a couple deep breaths, before he steps out of his car and strides up your porch. Then, he’s struck with realization: he never got you a gift. Frantically, Steve’s eyes dart around his surroundings, landing on the vibrant yellow sunflower in a planter. It’s the thought that counts, right?

Steve immediately holds the sunflower up to his face once your front door swings open. You break out into a grin when you step out onto the porch with him. “F-for you.” He stammers. 

“Thank you, Steve.” You take the flower into your hands, completely looking over the fact that it was one that your mother grew herself. Closing the door behind you, Steve offers his arm to you. You chuckle, wooed by his chivalrous gesture as he walks you to his car. There’s a sway in your steps, and Steve finds it a little amusing that you can’t walk straight. He’s suddenly thinking about Princess, wondering if he did enough to...

He shakes his head, pushing away any thoughts of her as he reverses out of your driveway. You and Steve are engaged in conversation; all awkwardness between the two of you are thrown out the window, and Steve feels relieved in getting to talk to know you more. Weird as it seems, he also feels like he’s met you before. Something about the way you talked and the sound of your voice sent him into memory lane. Only, he’s sure that it was a recent memory. 

As promised, you and Steve walk around the city with coffee cups in hand. Occasionally, your shoulders brush against each other. Your voices are loud, filled with enthusiasm when you mention a quaint bookstore down the avenue. Soon, you’re taking Steve by the hand, pulling him into your get-away place with innocent eagerness. You start to chase each other quietly down the shelves, laughing silently as Steve manages to nearly knock over a porcelain vase. You stand on opposite sides of a bookcase, starting another interesting conversation. 

“You’ve read all these books?” Steve stares at you in wonder, following you down the aisle. You nod proudly, picking up a lost novel from the floor. You pass it to Steve, who takes it carefully into his hands. He looks at you for a moment, before he flips through the dusted pages. “This is your favorite.”

“You remembered?” You meet his gaze with a touched smile, feeling giddy at how Steve was able to remember your favorite book from when you told him on your stroll.

“I didn’t know I was gonna be tested on that.” He jokes, tucking the book under his arm. “Is it for sale? I’ll buy it for you.”

“No, Steve. It’s okay. Thank you.” You pass up on his offer, rounding the corner of the bookcase in that you stand across of one another. “I would’ve bought it for myself, but it’s too expensive.” 

“That’s why I’ll get it for you. It’s a gift. Let me, Y/N.” He towers over you, holding the book against his heart. “I like you a lot. I wanna buy it for you as a - as a...”

You burst out into laughter, taking the book from him to place it on a shelf. “As a token of your affection?” He shrugs with a playful scoff, studying you. “Steve, you don’t need to give me anything. You don’t need a book to show me that.” 

He sucks in a nervous breath, parting his lips as he speaks. “Would it be too soon for me to kiss you?” He steps forward, light on his feet. The bookstore is silent, and the sudden tension between you and Steve is loud. “Can I kiss you?”

“I think that’d be much better.”

Steve pushes your hair behind your shoulder; his fingers brush over the fabric of your turtleneck sweater as he dips down to kiss both of your cheeks. The tip of his nose bumps against yours, and Steve closes his eyes at the little gasp you make when his hand trails across your back. You step into him, peering into his beautiful brown eyes with marvel. He presses his lips to yours, softly. The toe of his shoe bumps against yours as you run your hands down his arms. He tastes like an autumn day - a combination of sugar and spice. You pull away, letting your thumb graze across his bottom lip gracefully, and Steve isn’t afraid to kiss you once more. You’re smiling like a teenager when you finally step away from each other, cheeks reddened. 

“We should go...” You grin up at him coyly, lashes fluttering against your skin. Steve’s hand envelops yours as he leads you outside. Your arm finds itself tangled with his as you walk across the street, winding around the town until you reached his parked car. 

From then on, Steve hasn’t stopped taking you out on dates, bringing you to different shops and restaurants around town until nothing new was left for the two of you. However, you never really expressed what your relationship with him meant to you. Steve was in turmoil: Were you two casual? Was that a ‘no strings attached’ kind of thing? Were you guys even a thing?

Steve thinks he’s found an answer when he sees you one Wednesday morning in the community park - with Billy Hargrove. The conversation seems to be tense, based on the way that Billy stares down at you and how you push at his chest. Immediately, Steve’s jealousy is replaced with furiousness. Was Billy messing with you? Stopping his morning run, Steve stomps over to your place by the fountain, frowning with clear resentment. 

“You okay, Y/N?” He pulls you behind him, taken aback when he sees the tears in your eyes. He brings his voice down to a whisper so that you can only hear him. “Is he messing with you? What’s going on?”

“Steve, it’s - it’s fine.” You place your hand on his chest, pulling him away. You sniffle, and Steve feels the blood boil in his chest at the thought of someone making you cry.

“Whatever shit you just pulled, Billy, I want you to know that you should fuck off.” He growls at Billy as you both walk away, tugging you close to his body. He shushes your sobs, soothing you with sweet words. “I’m here, Y/N. Can I take you home? Do you want me to take you there?”

You’re nodding rapidly; your airway is constricted with overwhelming emotion as Steve talks about his day to distract you, not once does he ask you for directions to your house, having memorized the walk there anyways. 

You’re in your room when you cry into his shoulder, clutching at Steve’s shirt that was now damp with tears. Steve feels heartbroken - not because he saw you with Billy, because that meant nothing to him. Nothing mattered to him than the beautiful, crying girl in his arms. The bed creaks as he shifts, embracing you tighter. You haven’t spoken a word since earlier, and Steve patiently waits in the silence of your room. “I’m sorry,” You croak, wiping your tears from your eyes with the sleeve of your jacket. “God, I ruined your shirt.” 

He rubs your elbow. “You wanna tell me about what happened?”

“You’re gonna hate me.” You mutter, curling up into yourself. Steve stares at you intently, clenching his jaw. “Billy... Billy and I were kind of - I don’t know what it was, but we messed around. We were messing around before we started going out.” You shut your eyes at how Steve tenses up. “I wanted to break things off with him, but I couldn’t... he knew stuff and... he wasn’t hurting me, I hope you know that. I was just too scared to let go.”

So you were messing around with Billy.

“You didn’t tell me.” Steve scoots away from you. His jealousy arrises again at the thought of you and Billy together, behind his back. “We were together and you didn’t tell me about him? Y/N, what the hell!”

“You have every fucking right to be angry, but Steve... Steve, when were we ever together? You were doing the sam - It’s not like I was cheating on you.”

No. Not like this. 

“Bullshit, Y/N! We were going on dates!” He stands from your bed, gesturing at you wildly with his hands. You hurt him. You fucking hurt him.

“I’m sorry! Steve, I’ve never... I’ve just never been committed to anyone. I-It scares me.”

“Well, it looks like you won’t be committed to anybody for a long time. I’ll see you around, Y/N. I’m done here.” 

You are left with a hanging jaw and an aching soul as Steve leaves your house, slamming the front door behind him angrily. 

Steve doesn’t sit next to you anymore on Thursdays, resorting in the dark corner of the classroom. He doesn’t talk to you that much either, rarely even engaging in a full conversation with you. He knows it’s childish to ignore you, and that you weren’t technically at fault for anything that had happened.

He’s done the same thing as you. So why the fuck was he acting like this?

He just needs time.

Time to figure everything out.

-

He’s at a well-deserved spring break party when he runs into Princess again. She seems off, disinterested in everything around her. Heck, Billy was staying out of her way as well, making out with other girls instead of her, to his surprise. Steve feels a bit suspicious, based on how she began to stray away from the attention, chatting with friends in the corner of the room and drinking soda rather than beer. When he locks eyes with her from across the house, he doesn’t hesitate to approach her. This time, he’s completely sober and he can actually feel his nerves flare up.

“Hey,” He says to her, raising his cup of water. “How are you?”

“Not in the mood, Steve.” She sighs, downing her soda as she stares at him blankly. There’s a tiny hitch in her forced voice, and Steve easily catches the way she eyes him. He inches closer to her, yet respectfully careful in keeping his distance. “A guy fucks you once and suddenly he can waltz in whenever he wants.” She snaps, brushing angrily past Steve.

What the hell?

People whisper and point at Steve as he chases after her. She walks briskly out of the party, clicking her heels against the sidewalk as her arms swing at her sides. Not once does she look back when Steve calls for her to stop. He’s able to weave around her, halting her in her tracks. “What is your problem? Does everyone have a problem with me these days? Jesus, Princess-” She stops him by smashing her lips against his, bringing his head down to meet hers. Steve raises his eyebrows in surprise, before relaxing into the kiss. He caresses the side of her neck, before he has to tear himself away. “What’s gotten into you?” There’s something about the color of her eyes underneath the mask, a shade that he’s sure that he’s seen carved into his mind. His eyes are concerned, and he suddenly feels a knowing feeling when she presses her forehead against his, tracing his bottom lip.

It feels too familiar. 

“I’m sorry.”

“For what? Princess?” Confused, he takes her hands into his. It’s too intimate of a gesture, he knows, but her behavior was worrying.

“I need you.” She whispers breathily, before stepping onto the tips of her toes to kiss him again. “Please.”

“I don’t wanna take advantage of you like this.” 

“You aren’t. I just want another good time with you...” She scoffs, and the wall she’s been putting up is back again. “Daddy?” Her face splits into a mischievous smirk when Steve holds his breath.

Screw it. 

He leads Princess by the shoulder, pushing her into the backseat of his car roughly. She lands against the leather seats with a squeal, before Steve is climbing in himself and locking the doors. He slams a hand against the window to brace himself, hovering over her body as he leaves open-mouthed kisses down her neck and over the tops of her breasts. They’re naked in minutes, grinding against each other. The car has fogged up, windows blocked out with condensation as Steve pushes his cock between Princess’ folds. Her leg is propped up over his shoulder, while the other hangs loosely against the driver’s seat. Steve can’t hear his own thoughts over the sounds of her wetness, which drives him to thrust into her harshly. She gasps at the full feeling, gripping the skin at her stomach as she bites back a moan.

“Where do you feel me? In your stomach?” She nods blissfully, combing her nails through Steve’s hair as he pounds in dick into her. “Does Daddy make you feel good?”

“Yeah. You do.” She whimpers, barely audible over the creakiness of the car. It shifts from side to side, surely drawing attention from outsiders. It excites Steve, the possibility of getting caught with Princess. He wraps his arms around her waist, groaning as she whispers dirty comments into his ear. “Look at you, daddy. Fuck, you love it. Can I cum, daddy?”

“No. Shit, no.” He shakes his head. Sweat accumulates on his forehead from how hot the car’s gotten, and he grunts loudly into Princess’ blue hair. “I’m so close. Wait for me.” Steve’s thrusts become sloppier each second, and she pushes the extra mile by clenching around him. “Go, cum. Fuck!”

Princess moans sinfully, hitting her head lightly against the door as she rubs at her clit. Steve pulls out of her pussy; she rolls onto the floor of the car gracefully, landing on her knees before she pumps Steve’s dick into her mouth. He holds onto her hair, careful not to tug too hard as he fucks her mouth. It’s messy - saliva everywhere, mascara running down her cheeks as she struggles to keep her tears under control.

With a look of approval, she lets him push her head down onto his cock, her nose brushes against his happy trail while she gags around him. Steve cums in her mouth, moaning at the lustful look that she was giving him. He pulls her up for one more kiss after she swallows his load, then collapses against the seat with ragged breaths. He’s quick to put his clothes back on, taking a glimpse at Princess with awestruck eyes as she followed his actions. 

“Hey.” He nudges her arm. “Don’t leave.”

“I have to pee, Steve.” She snickers, glancing at the house that still held a party. “But I... I’ll come back.”

“Promise?”

She cups his cheek, wiping the lipgloss from his mouth. “I promise.”

Steve feels nothing but relief when he sees Princess come back to his car. He pulls her inside, scratching his eyebrow as she takes a seat beside him. The air smells of sex, and Steve resorts to rolling down the windows. 

“Are you okay now?” He questions, staring outside. 

“I will be.” She answers. The leather squeaks as she turns to face him, leaning against the door. “Are you okay?”

There’s no point in lying. Because based on how she began to study his face, Steve knows that she sees the bags under his eyes, and the lack of enthusiasm in his voice. With an exasperated sigh, Steve meets her stare.

“I don’t think so.” She listens earnestly. “I met this... this amazing girl. Her name’s Y/N. I doubt you’ve heard of her. She’s low profile around here.” He chuckles. “But, uh... I really like her. A lot. I haven’t met someone as - as breathtaking, and kind, and intelligent as her in a long time. She’s different, you know?”

“Yeah.”

“And, the thing is... I thought I knew her. I took her on countless dates - great dates, by the way. I’m a pro at dates. Dating professional, actually.”

“I’m sure of it.” She laughs, fixing the mask on her face. “God, sorry, I hate this thing.”

“Take it off then. I’d like a face to match the voice.” She glances away, peering at herself in the rearview mirror. Steve senses her uneasiness, so he moves to rub her thigh with a comforting tone. “I’m kidding. I just hope you haven’t glued it on.” Momentarily, they exchange laughter. “But I’d like to meet you one day. Really meet you. When you’re ready.” There’s a lingering gaze between them, before Steve continues swiftly. “Anyways, I’m taking Y/N on dates, then she tells me that - I guess that she was involved with someone before me. I got mad. I’m a fucking hypocrite because here I am, with you.”

He exhales shakily. “I’m jealous, too. Because someone as perfect as her could never be with someone as imperfect as me.” Princess opens her mouth, but Steve speaks before she can. “I know. I know it’s stupid to think like that, but damn. I can’t help it.”

“Not everyone’s perfect, Steve. I’m - I know that deep down Y/N feels the same way. I don’t know her, but as perfect as she makes herself out to be, she must have her vices, too.”

“I should talk to her.”

“She’d like that. I’m sure.”

A pinch of sadness wafts around the air, and Steve knows that it’s goodbye. If he really wanted to pursue you, he’d have to leave behind Princess.

He’s okay with that.

“I guess this is goodbye, then.” She smiles nostalgically.

“It is.”

Princess leans over, pressing a chaste kiss to the side of his head. “Bye, Steve.” She steps out of the car, carrying her boots as she heads the opposite direction.

Goodbye, Princess. 

-

“You wanna talk?” You look up at Steve, who leans over your desk. 

“After school. Not here.” He shakes his head, ignoring the way that your classmates were glaring at the two of you. “I’ll meet you at the bookstore. Your favorite place.” 

Steve doesn’t even wait for your response. Suddenly, he’s hollering a big ‘screw this class!’ to Mr. Cortez as he bolts out of the classroom, leaving you there in your chair with wide eyes. 

He wants to make it perfect for you - his apology, his sappy ass declaration of ‘emotion’ towards you. He’s rented out the whole bookstore, passing the clerk a couple hundreds as he waits for you to come. His head throbs with adrenaline, pacing around the store as he thinks of what to say to you. 

You’re my perfect.

I think I love you.

“Shit, too soon.” He hits himself in the face with a book.

Hour.

After.

Hour.

You still aren’t here. Should Steve be freaking out? Were you going to flake on him again? He’s too busy panicking to hear the chiming bell by the door. He walks to the back of the store, banging his head against a shelf as he tries to calm himself down.

But when he turns around, he nearly faints.

“Princess? What are you-” She holds a finger up to his lips, before she slowly pulls it away from him when he is finally silent. 

Stepping back, she inhales deeply. 

Her hands move up to touch her blue wig. With a tug, she pulls it off. Her natural hair falls in waves against her shoulders, and she combs her hands through them lazily.

Steve’s eyes widen when she reaches around her head to untie the mask. 

It clatters to the floor.

“Y/N.”

It all connects.

The voice, the movements, the mannerisms...

You’ve been behind the mask for this whole time.

“Hey, there.” You chuckle uneasily, tucking your hair behind your ears. “Cat got your tongue?”

“Y/N, you - I - Princess was - what?” He covers his mouth in shock, placing a free hand on his hip as he bites down on his knuckle.

“I’m sorry if... if I’m not who or what you expected.” You shrug, crossing your arms over your chest as you observe his features. “Steve? Are you mad?”

“No, I’m... I’m not mad.” He stares at you, mouth agape as you grab his hand. “I’m - it’s been you? This whole time?”

“Yeah. Yeah, it has.”

“Why?”

You wipe away your lipstick with the back of your sleeve. “I never told you about Billy because he knew my identity. I couldn’t let go of him because he would tell everyone about me - the real me.” You confess, feeling tears brim at your eyes. “I know this whole thing looks... looks awful. I wasn’t using you. Gosh, I hope I wasn’t using you, Steve. But fuck, you noticed me. The real me. I was too scared that you’d see all my flaws the more we got closer, and I thought that being Princess would save me from that hell.” You swallow, closing your eyes as Steve brings a hand up to hold your face. “You proved me wrong. Because someone as perfect as you ended up liking someone as imperfect as me.”

He wipes the tears from your face. “You know... you know that you’ve seen my dick, right? My actual, full-on, naked dick?”

“Steve!” You gasp, chuckling uncontrollably at his words.

“Y/N, I like you for who you are. Shit, I hope you realize that. Yeah, I did like Princess, but Y/N was a whole new level of breathtaking. I don’t care that you have flaws. We all do, remember? You told me that. And I lo - I like you for everything that you are. Whether you’re shy, or - or loud or quiet, whether you like bookstores over parties or whatever. I just wished you didn’t have to hide yourself from me. Princess or not, I would’ve fallen for you either way.”

“Really?”

“Fuck, yeah.” He whispers, leaning into you. “Princess was able to show me a good time, but Y/N is someone I want for a long time.” 

He takes you by the chin, pressing his lips against yours for what felt like the first time again. How could he not have realized? The way your lips felt, how perfect they molded with his, the sweet taste of your gloss and how feathery your touch was against his skin. He should’ve known it was you. Steve moans into your mouth when you pull at his hair, and the kiss deepens when you slip your tongue into his mouth. He spins you around, slamming your back against the bookcase. 

“I wanna see the real you, okay?” He murmurs into your collarbones, undoing the zipper of your jeans. You whine into his jaw, peppering his neck with hickeys.

He drops to his feet to pull down your panties. Steve lifts your legs up with ease, before his face is buried in your pussy. He laps at it, sucking on your clit and licking at your folds with expertise. You don’t shy away from moaning his name, yelping when he smacks his hand against your inner thigh to keep your legs apart. He pushes a finger inside you, smirking at how wet you always get because of him. He adds another digit, gasping at the wanton groan you let out when he uses his thumb to play with your clit. 

“I love your fingers, daddy. Feels so good.” You place your hand on the back of his head, guiding him to the perfect spots. “I... Steve, fuck.”

“You gonna cum so soon? You’re gonna cum, aren’t you?” He stands up, still fingering you at a fast pace. You rest your head in the crook of his neck, eyes rolling to the back of your head as you began to see white spots in your vision. “Good girl. Look at you, angel.”

“Fuck me, please. I wanna make you feel good.” You beg him, whining as he quickly stepped out of his sweatpants. He tosses his shirt aside, licking his lips at how your nipples poked out through the thin fabric of your top. He laughs at the neediness in your voice, turning you around so that your tits were pressed against the bookcase. 

“You’re beautiful, Y/N. Every single time I see you like this...” He kisses your shoulder, pulling your hair into a ponytail. His eyes land on the butterfly tattoo on your neck. “My sweet princess.” Steve lubes up his cock with his spit, groaning at how painfully hard he is. “You’re okay?” He checks up on you, pushing the tip into your wet hole. You nod, moaning when he sinks in deeper. 

Books begin to fall to the ground as Steve fucks you, holding you by your waist as he thrusts into you.

It feels better than before.

Princess was a great fuck, but you?

You were heaven itself. Despite how lustful you made him feel.

Steve cums at the same time as you do, grunting and moaning without shame as he emptied his load onto your back, where it dribbled onto the floor.

“That never gets old.” You giggle, breasts heaving as Steve turned you back around.

“You’re perfect.” Steve says, resting his forehead against yours. 

“Thank you for everything, Steve.”

He stares into your eyes lovingly, glistening with nothing but pure adoration for you.

“Anything for my princess.”

[spaceskam]

for @alexmanesappreciation weekend. technically falls under day 1 despite it being day 2 but what can you do. Heavily inspired by You & I from Bare: A Pop Opera, so high school au!

Alex was minding his own damn business, getting his books out of his locker when town arms snaked around his torso and hot breath hit his ear.

"Hey, stranger," Michael Guerin whispered, nipping at his skin as he pressed his hands into his lower stomach. Alex gulped softly and tried to fight his grin. A quick look around the hall proved they were alone–which made sense. Michael had a reputation. "What's a man gotta do to get you alone? Toys? A puppy?" He paused and pressed his hips hard into Alex's back, making his want for him known. "How about a lollipop?"

Alex laughed, squirming in grasp at the gross analogy. He managed to turn around and Michael's half-lidded eyes were fully on him, unphased and not checking the halls for others. Alex's felt a rush of adrenaline.

"No thanks. Stranger danger," he retorted. Michael's eyes flickered around his face, leaning even closer so their foreheads met and Alex was pinned between his body and the lockers.

"So a kiss is out of the question?" Michael breathed. Again, he didn't check for bystanders. Alex was giddy.

"Well, when you say it like that..."

He leaned in, barely getting to enjoy his lips for a millisecond before footsteps sounded and Michael spun, his back hitting the locker beside Alex's. Alex sighed and saw a couple other students entering the hallway they were in before turning back into his locker. He should've known that was too good to be true.

"So, where were you last night? I waited up," Alex said, soft enough no one could really hear as he went back to looking through his locker.

"Couldn't get away early enough," he said.

Alex frowned. There were things that came with being apart of a religious private school, one of them was usually having ridiculously strict parents. Michael, however, got the worst of them all whenever one of the big shots in the town's church decided to loudly announce how good they were by fostering a teen boy with "problems". So far, the only problem Alex had found in Michael Guerin was that he was starved of affection and could be reduced to a useless pile of boy with the right amount of heavy petting.

"Oh," Alex said, trying not to make him feel guilty.

"We're forever damned to loneliness, aren't we?" Michael sighed, playing up the dramatics but Alex's saw how much he really felt that. Still, he didn't want to call him out, so he smiled.

"I stayed awake as long as I could. Got about 2 hours of sleep," Alex told him. Michael's eyes scanned the freshly empty halls again before giving him a fond smile.

"Impressive," he said, slowly sliding closer again. He was so close, but not close enough. "What'd you say we skip? Go find somewhere... Catch up on sleep?"

"Oh?" Alex hummed, intrigued and showing it. Michael smiled that pretty little smile of his, lips pressing to his cheek.

"Should I bring that lollipop I mentioned?"

Alex huffed a laugh, but turned to meet his lips.

"I think you should."

And then the bell rang and the halls filled with people.

Again, Michael pulled away and Alex prepared to be upset. He didn’t like the person he was whenever he was being the perfect, all-star football player that his foster parents wanted. He liked the sweet dork he got when they were alone. But, God forbid...

“Manes, you got my homework?” Kyle Valenti said as he sidled up beside Michael. They were bros. How gross was that?

“Uh, fuck off, Valenti, mine takes precedence,” Michael told him, elbowing him. Alex didn’t entertain them as they started to play fight in the halls, pulling out two copies of the Calc homework. Technically, Michael had done all the work and Alex was just the face of the business. They split the profits.

“$15,” Alex said blandly, accepting as they both paid up. It was a always a show for Michael. He had to wonder if that’s all they’d ever be. A secret layer beneath this one.

“Thanks,” Kyle said before clapping Michael on the shoulder, “See you at practice. Better bring your A game, man, Imma kick your ass this time.”

“We’re on the same team, you dumbass,” Michael said, shoving him away. Alex rolled his eyes and closed the door of his locker, turning to head to class. 

“See you later, Guerin.”

“Wait, Alex.”

Alex, putty in his hands as always, allowed his arm to be grabbed and pulled him back so they could talk. The hall was still busy though, so the contact only lasted a minute, but Alex still waited for him to speak.

“You know I have to--”

Again, as if specially designed to ruin everything, Maria DeLuca walked and gave Michael a sweet smile. She was pretty and nice and Alex knew they’d look good together. That only seemed to make it harder when Michael gave her his full focus, giving her that flirtatious smile that made Alex feel sick when it wasn’t for him.

“Hey, Michael,” she said, “I’ve been looking for you.”

Alex had to roll his eyes in irritation, clutching his books as he wondered how easy it would be to slip out of earshot. Probably easily.

“Oh, yeah?” Michael said, “What for?”

“I was wondering, if you had a date for prom yet?” she asked, still giving that pretty smile, “I tried to text you, but you didn’t answer. Did you lose my number?”

To keep from projectile vomiting at the strange dance that was heteronormative flirting, Alex turned to leave.

“I, uh, look, I’ll get back to you, okay? I need to talk to Manes here about an essay he needs to write for me,” Michael said.

“Oh, okay.”

Alex tried to walk faster as Michael followed, but, as soon as they reached a hall full of people who weren’t paying attention, Michael grabbed his arm and pulled him into an empty classroom. He shut the door behind them, giving Alex that borderline scared look that he always gave when he knew he fucked up. Alex still hadn’t quite decided if he used it to knowingly manipulate him or not because it was always painstakingly effective in making him cave.

“What?” Alex asked softly, “Don’t look at me like that. Have fun with your fuckboy ways, I’m not trying to dictate what you do.”

“Alex,” he said, forcing a little laugh as he shook his head, “It’s just a fucking game I gotta play.”

“And like I said, not gonna dictate what you do,” Alex said coldly. Michael moved closer.

“C’mon, you know it’s not real. I just have to appease the parents,” Michael said softly, reaching for Alex’s hand. He reluctantly let him take it. “You’re the the one I want and you know it. Yeah, we have to be discrete and shit, but you know why. Look at me. You know why.”

“Just... how am I supposed to trust you? Every girl in this school would literally fight to the death to get your attention. You could have whatever you wanted,” Alex pointed out. Michael grinned and gravitated closer. 

“Then it’s a good thing I want you,” he said, pulling his hand to his lips, “You’re the only one that makes me lose my fucking mind. Why would I let go of that when I have it? My eyes are only on you.”

Alex looked away, trying not to show just how easy it was to fold under his sweet words and his impossibly good looks. Michael came closer, slowly backing him against the teachers desk. Alex fidgeted slightly as he pressed his hips in closer and went from politely kissing his palm to pressing Alex’s fingertips against his lips. Alex tested him and pushed his thumb into his mouth. Michael welcomed it which made it that much harder to remember why he was upset.

“Need help there?” Michael asked quietly, eyes gesturing down to where their hips met. Alex let out a slightly exasperated breath.

“You’re so fucking cute and it’s really hard to be mad at you when you do shit like this,” Alex admitted. Michael smiled all proud and made a show of taking Alex’s forefinger and middle finger into his mouth, hollowing out his cheeks. He gulped and fidgeted some more. “You think you can help me out?”

Michael pulled away from his fingers with an exaggerated pop. “I gotta get to class or I would.”

Alex nodded but he didn’t like it.

“Hey, don’t worry,” Michael said, his hand laying against his cheek, “I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me, I’m not leaving you.”

“Not even for Kyle?” Alex asked teasingly. Michael grinned and shrugged.

“Well, maybe--”

“Shut up,” Alex laughed, shoving his shoulder gently. Michael just laughed and leaned in for another kiss. But they couldn’t do that for long. They had class and this room would be filling with students soon. “I’ll see you soon?”

“I’ll come pick you up,” Michael promised, “We’ll drive out to the desert, lay under the stars, see how what happens.”

“Sounds good.”

“I know,” Michael said, giving him one last kiss, “Miss me.”

He quickly fled the room and Alex sighed, fixing his thought process so he’d actually be useful once he got to class.

And he would miss him. That’s all he did.

[mincedliveblog]

Kingdom Ep2 

I was like “why flashback” but oohh its to establish Blackarachnia as a little liar. I see :3

Wait why did Thundercracker say to Dinobot that they caught one of his “Maximal pals” spying - how do any of the Decepticons know about Dinobot’s wavering loyalties? Did BW Megs just announce that to them upon introduction lol

Wow OP really asking the Preds to not rescue their teammate and look for the allspark first instead huh. Bold ask from someone who not only lost it in the first place but did so at the potential expense of their entire planet. Primal right to be pissed off with this guy.

The way Bumblebee has to make the appeal and only after the BW crew mentions they are the last five (six) of TWO HUNDRED GUYS... 

And then OP still only gives them a strike team. AND drops an annoying “have faith” line. Primal did you maybe wanna wail on this guy again. 

Pretty sure when Primal says “Thanks for the backup” its supposed to be read as sincere but I’m choosing to read it as annoyed at how OP was being condescending about the whole thing. The voice acting is bad enough that I can do what I want.

Okay as much as I’ve been smack talking the voice acting BW Meg’s little “yess” when yelling at Dinobot was not the worst I’ve heard. Also lol @ Dinobot being like “I’ve always been loyal to you” honey we SAW the flashback scene when you tried to talk Blackarachnia into helping you give the disk back. Do you not remember that. 

Dinobot: “I have to follow orders.” *zaps Airazor* Okay first off 1) Megatron at no point ordered you to do that. He was just zapping her for fun two minutes ago and 2) HES NOT EVEN THERE IN THE ROOM HE LEFT. NO ONE IS THERE DINOBOT. THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO REASON TO DO THAT. 

BW Megs making all these anime “Uwha” noises like bruh

Okay I SWEAR im not trying to be down on the Beast Wars stuff being any different from the original considering I lit the past two series up for just copying their tf homework assignments but having BW Megs be kind of a kissass at worst and just genuinely loyal to OG Megs at best is... an interesting choice. 

Wheeljack and Rhinox working together to power the Ark back and Wheeljack being small next to Rhinox uwu

“The planet’s wildly varying terrain has been proving hard to navigate for some of us” says Arcee, while in robot mode. Girl did you even try to you know. Transform. The maximals look to be running over 3ft hills at best. I bet Elita One wouldn’t have this problem.

 Speaking of, where is she I wonder... are they going to cut back to her at any point? Missing the smartest girl in the room.

The allspark just being this floating Navi looking thing... again I’m not going to look back at the wiki but uh. Pretty sure it didn’t used to be like that.

IT BECAME MANGUS’S HEAD OKAY. Then quicksand... then Megatron is in the Nemesis’s captain’s chair and wakes up and rips the Matrix off? Okay. What am I missing. Was that a Matrix dream?

Dinobot explaining their time travel plan and its like whoosh right over my head. Its not going to make sense I’m not even going to try and make it make sense. 

Airazor [referring to Predacons vs Maximals] “It doesnt have to be binary” we stan a gender non-conforming queen

Haha jokes but really she is in a pretty traditionally feminine role... gets kidnapped... strong empathy... using emotions to sway others... I don’t actually remember hardly any of her personality from beast wars other than how she dates Tigatron so maybe its a carryover... sorry girl. 

WHY DID RATTRAP TURN BACK INTO ROBOT MODE TO “HIDE” ON THE CEILING LAMP WHEN HE WAS PERFECTLY CAPABLE OF GOING BACK INTO THE LITTLE CREVICE HE WAS IN IN RAT MODE HELLO

“Starscream is a ghost” says Dinobot. Haha get it. Like G1, where he’s a ghost. Can’t believe it took this long. 

Also but where did Starscream get the cloaking he is using actually... feel like I missed that. 

Dinobot really choosing to team up with Starscream and Blackarachnia. Honey. Also unclear on how much Dinobot knows about the future and like timeline affects and whatnot... like I said I can tell the show isn’t going to get into it in a way that makes sense so I’m not gonna think too deeply about it.

Okay but the entire team just waiting outside while rattrap snuck in... and then getting captured... I gave OP shit but you know what I take some of it back. They didn’t need all those guys lol.

THE REAL ASTROTRAIN IS LIKE FOUR FEET BEHIND THE DISGUISED MIRAGE I don’t remember alot about Scorponok either but was he really that dumb? Sorry dude.

Rattrap’s button bit / the mention of the Predacon’s having the “high ground” / Arcee’s sigh as the Predacon’s came down the hill: slight chuckles for all different reasons.

Optimus busting all dramatic out of the brush to turn the tide of battle where did you even come from my dude.

ALRIGHT PRIMAL PLAYING 5D CHESS AND HAVING ORDERED AIRAZOR TO BE CAPTURED LMAO. The funniest is Prime just going “Hmmm” like you KNOW he’s thinking “fuck that was a good idea. devious. damn. wish i did that.”

Okay and now the matrix is back on Megatron’s chest... literally what was that scene where he threw it off huh? 

[heronwritingx]

chapter 3

im sorry this took so long!!!! also originally this chapter was longer but I ended up splitting it into 2 so its not that great and im sorry about that but also I hope you enjoy it...

Heather tapped her pen and chewed on her bottom lip as she sat beside Alejandro in their regular Biology class, it was the one class he had with her where her usually snappy, mean attitude was non-existent. She was quiet and tended to keep her head down and her attention as far from that disgusting teacher as she could. He’d never seen Heather intimidated or scared, he didn’t know she even could feel that way but for that hour or so she spent in that man’s classroom, her body remained tense.

Alejandro could do nothing but watch, eh couldn’t say anything in class and he didn’t dare to say anything to her outside of class either.

“It’s time to return the previous homework assignments and discuss the answers,”

He felt it too. He saw her eyes. He’d never seen her look so scared. Her body went straight and stiff and for just a moment, she didn’t breathe.

Alejandro watched as every student received a piece of paper, even himself, but her. He thought something like this would happen soon. The man wasn’t going to give up, even if she was taken. Alejandro quietly slipped a copy of her homework from his book and placed it on her desk.

“It seems, Heather,” she had to stop herself from shuddering, “you didn’t hand in your copy.”

“It’s right here.” Alejandro spoke up, her shoulders were trembling, and her voice would’ve cracked if she tried to spoke, “It seems she didn’t forget.”

Her eyes widened and Alejandro didn’t seem smug or like he was trying to one-up her, she genuinely thought he was trying to help her. She didn’t like that she had to rely on him to help her, but she’d take it right now. She could not be left alone with that man and Alejandro wasn’t going to let her be.

“It seems…I must have made a mistake.” The man spoke through gritted teeth and Alejandro smirked in victory.

After that, the lesson continued on as one would think it would. Heather, however, spent the time just trying to calm herself down. For that moment, her heart stopped. Every horrid memory she had flooded back and overwhelmed her. Her breath was staggered and sharp and she did everything she possibly could to maintain composure. HE would not break her.

Not now. Not ever.

She let out a deep sigh of relief and while acting as though she was fine, she’d never moved so fast to get out of that classroom. Hell, she even forced herself to skip the next class. She couldn’t concrete, she wouldn’t be able to focus on anything else. She had to calm herself down properly, she needed to be completely out of that school.

However, she shouldn’t have been surprised that Alejandro followed her and called her name. She didn’t want to see him, let alone thank him for helping her. She was embarrassed he even had too!

“Will you quit following me!?” Heather finally snapped, flinging around.

“Is that how you’re going to act after I helped you?” He retorted, folding his arms.

“I didn’t ask you to help me! I don’t need your help!” She yelled.

“That was our deal,” He said, sighing a little, “You help me with Jose, and I help you with him.”

She flung back around, and he didn’t know what she was thinking and Heather sure as hell wasn’t going to let him see her eyes water. It was humiliating. She was being controlled by such a sick, horrible person. He had control of her every movement in that class and she hated, she DISPISED the fact she had to rely on Alejandro to help her.

“Just…leave me alone.” She muttered.

He sighed and while a tinge in his heart told him to reach out for her, he didn’t. What was he meant to do? Try and comfort her? She’d never let him. She’d swear and carry on until she was able to flee. Heather was also nothing more to him than an associate, his rival at most. They were in this for their own personal gain.

Heather had managed to sneak out of school without any staff members noticing and flopped onto her bed, she was ready for the day to end. She closed her eyes and laid there, her mind wandering. Deep down though, a feeling of dread sat in her gut, unable to be shaken.

Bzzzzt. Bzzzzt. Bzzzzt.

Alejandro groaned but ignored the buzzing sound, despite the fact it had woken him up from his rather peaceful slumber. He rolled over and buried his head in the pillows to drown the noise out, but it persisted and persisted until he gave in.

��Que?” He seethed out, not realising what language he was even speaking because it was literally two am.

“Alejandro! God, finally!” Heather practically shouted into the phone, her voice a little panicked.

“Heather?” he blinked.

Why would she be calling him at this time of night?

“I need you to come over.” She told him, this time whispering her voice, “Right. Now.”

“Heather, it’s two am.” Alejandro retorted in a deadpan tone.

“I don’t care! I think someone is trying to break into my house!” She snapped at him, “Who the hell else am I meant to call!?”

Alejandro’s eyes shot open properly and now that he focused, she did sound panicked and her breathing was much choppier and faster than usual. She sounded scared and he’d never heard her sound like that before, so he had to do what he could to help her.

“I’ll be there as soon as I can then.” He told her, “Just stay where you are, okay.”

“Okay.” Heather complied, she wasn’t going to argue with him in this sort of situation, after all.

He quickly pulled on a shirt and a jacket as the temperature was starting to get colder, then his shoes and quickly headed out the door. He was worried about her; he wouldn’t deny that. She could get hurt, or worse…no, he couldn’t think like that. He just had to help her – Heather wouldn’t have called him if it wasn’t serious to her. She sent her address to him via text and he made his way there, he didn’t even care if he woke any of his family members up when he left. He just needed to know she was okay.

“Heather?” He called her as soon as he parked in her driveway, attempting to deter the potential criminal.

“Jeez, you took long enough!” She snapped at him, “What if they’d gotten in!?”

“I wasn’t going to call you while I was driving.” He retorted.

“Yeah, yeah…” she grumbled, trying to stay calm, “Can you see anyone?”

“Not yet. I’m hanging up now, so they don’t hear me.” He told her, “I’ll call you if I find anything.”

“Promise?”

He was surprised how childlike she sounded, maybe this was just how she was when she was scared? She sounded genuinely vulnerable and Alejandro ignored the skip of his heart that he felt.

“I promise.” He told her, only to hang up the phone a moment later.

Heather sat in her bed, her knees up to her chest as she just…waited. She never thought she’d freeze up like this. In her head, she’d convinced herself just who was wanting to get to her, and it made her sick. Alejandro had put a stop to his moves towards her, but she didn’t know how long that would deter him for. Would Alejandro even be able to fight him off it was him? Sure, he was strong, but this man was a grown adult – Heather just hoped her gut feeling was wrong.

Alejandro grimaced as he walked around the side of her large home – it wasn’t quite as big as his but still big. He stopped however when he heard a whispering voice, a girl’s voice.

“You said your keys would work!”

“They must’ve changed the locks!” a male voice followed the girl.

How would a burglar have a key? He moved as quietly as he could as the distant lights from the street showed him to shadowy figures rattling at the glass door that led from the home to the back patio and garden. The rattling at the door stopped and Alejandro realised they’d probably heard him.

Heather just heard a commotion; she didn’t know what the hell it was. She just hoped Alejandro was okay. When the noise stopped, she found herself out of bed and tiptoeing down to the back door where she heard the noises come from and flicked on the lights – hoping to fight Alejandro victorious over the person trying to rob her.

“Heather!” The male voice shouted, as Heather found Alejandro standing beside the two perpetrators with a rather unimpressed expression.

She just…stopped. She stared at them for a moment. Then she almost screamed.

“Henry!?” She yelled back.

It was her brother. Her stupid, older, meant to be away at a college halfway across the country, brother. She would admit though; she didn’t recognise the young woman beside him.

“What the hell are you doing here?” She spat at him as she opened the door.

“Trying to get inside, obviously.” Henry retorted.

Alejandro just watched them for a moment, if he had to describe her brother, it would be that he looked just what she’d look like as a young man. He was tall and lean, his hair was short, black hair and his eyes matched her. His expressions were even similar. If Alejandro didn’t know better, he’d assume they were twins.

“I mean, what the fuck are you doing here!?” Heather repeated, looking ready to pull her hair out.

“Oh, I dropped out of college. I’m moving back in. Don’t tell mom.” Henry told her.

“What!?” Heather screamed, “Hell no you’re not moving back in here!”

Alejandro could tell this wasn’t going to end well, especially not at that time of night and the fact that Heather was already on edge due to what happened at school. Henry’s girlfriend at his side seemed to think the same as Alejandro, she was trying to quell the situation on her side.

“How about you two discuss this in the morning?” Alejandro suggested, placing his hand upon Heather’s shoulder, “When you’ve both rested.”

“No way, he’s not moving back in here.” Heather grumbled, folding her arms.

“What’s the big deal? It’s not like mom’s going to be back anytime soon.” Henry shot back, glaring at her.

Heather’s eyes widened for a moment, but she quickly regained her composure, she wasn’t going to let him so easily have his way. However, she was tired, and her day was already long enough. She just wanted to sleep.

“Whatever…I’m going to bed.” Heather huffed, stomping off once more.

Alejandro grimaced and followed after her but not before introducing himself to his brother – it would’ve been strange not too. He caught her door before she could slam it shut and ended up in her room.

[loki-the-trikster-god]

clyde is me

i am clyde

we that does sounds gross. is it like cooked pasta that is frozen or not cooked pasta frozen? i don’t get the purpose of freezing either version though

the muffins are so good tbh i’m glad u enjoyed hehe

oh oki i thought it was literal for a second like-

ikr if people think i’m the maximum intelligence then humanity really is doomed

asdf ikr. science is like so interesting on the magic school bus but i want to die during science class. just another example of how fucked up society is

literally tho everything sucks more when it’s virtual

except for procrastination, because at home i have tumblr, it’s blocked at school

gasp a win win scenario murder is now encouraged as long as all utensils are cleaned afterwards

mental note: get a sword

hehe ty. my hair is overly thick like if i grow it even a little long i get a massive headache

hehe some books are good (i have the best ones in real copies so that’s pretty good too)

idk if it’s a saying but it’s weird either way.

homework sucks. not that i have too much (actually i have a lot what am i saying?) but it still sucks.

ooh u seem to be into medieval... and ballad stuff

sounds interesting. ahahaha it’s pretty solid reasoning i love it

it sounds so mature compared to my favourite book which is called the extraordinaries by t j klune and is literally 400 pages of gay superheroes, and gay sex jokes. it’s fricking hilarious i can’t read it in public or else i’ll start laughing too hard that ill get weird stares (i speak from experience)

oh definitely duel them to death. or u know roast them really badly that works too. gunshots are too loud and too messy. knives... eh flying daggers are badass but slitting throats are messy too. duel to the death sounds efficient and it’s a challenge and who doesn’t love those?

hm. questionnnnn: what’s ur favourite hobby? besides writing and reading.

asdfhjk ikr they even had to like sexualize her and make her all skinny and stuff bc “that is what girls are supposed to look like”. i didn’t see this while watching it but i bet they gave her breasts too (breasts is a weird word) and i bet she’s wearing a dress. seriously tho. like u said, they are fricking mountains!!!

anyways. clyde, out

until next time :)

Clyde is you! And cecil is me.

Sorry it’s taking so god damn long for me to respond to these - I promise I’m not ignoring you or anything it’s just a mixture of executive dysfunction and school. :(

It’s like frozen and then you cook it and it’s like normal pasta except lamer. I miss vegetables.

Muffins are important

The other day I forgot my own name when asked so if I’m the pinnacle of intelligence then,,,,fuck.

God fuck society man. Also fuck school. In math today I got questions wrong cause I wasn’t supposed to reduce radicals so I got 9 and the answer was radical 81. And like,,,,,,,,, it said fully simplified. So fuck that. Anyhow,,,,

Boring classes are better for me online cause I can fool around instead of losing my mind so that’s a thing.

You should absolutely get a sword. Stab your enemies, seduce people, be awesome. Also extra ✨dramatic flare✨

Oof thick hair. V fluffy. Can I touch (it’s ok if i cant)

You can floof my hair it’s v floofable

Homework is the worst I am incapable of doing Things. I don’t have loads of it ever so that’s ok but it’s like rrrheg.

I am into medieval stuff and like ballads and stuff I’m an old poetry person. I once read the Canterbury tales in Middle English. It was so fun.

Your book is extremely valid I’d love to read it,,,,,, I’ll put it on the list. I would never think less of someone for reading a less “””mature””” book or liking less complicated things. People like what they like and there’s as much value in a good comic as there is in like Keats or some shit. And comics are more fun. Anyhow that’s my rant.

Alright! Seeing as I have your consent, I shall have at them! My sword is a little heavy for a dueling blade but fuck Josh I don’t really care. Proper dueling etiquette dictates that I must give him a days notice, so I shall be texting a warning in the group chat. (I’m joking btw I won’t stab my costar)

My favorite hobby,,,,,, besides reading and writing would be cello probably. I’m not serious about it but it’s really nice.

Mmmmmmmm yes get me them mountain tiddies /j

But seriously wtf. Chill out homies.

My question for you is: favorite weather

Until next time bro!

[im-not-corrupted]

Safi, No (a Witchlands fanfiction) - Chapter One

This chapter was written by @un-empressed

Summary:            

On a rare occasion, Safi knew the answer in geography class. But when Merik Nihar spoke over her, she wasn't so happy. So her and Leopold devised a revenge plan to get back at him, and accidentally got everyone involved.

Vivia Nihar doesn't really have many friends, apart from Vaness. She's mostly focused on her studies - and what's wrong with that? But then she meets theriverstix online.

Aeduan and Iseult didn't mean to get involved in the revenge plan, but it was inevitable. But that's okay. They had each other to talk to.

Also posted on Ao3

Tags: @Iseultdetmidenzi

--- 

Safiya fon Hasstrel didn't know what she had done to deserve such maltreatment. Not only was geography a disaster that morning, her best friend wasn't listening. Or rather, she was until she realised what Safi was talking about. Apparently she was immature for wanting the basic right of speaking. It wasn't her fault that she had an insufferable classmate, and it certainly wasn't her fault that he decided he could speak over her.

It wasn't like she enjoyed geography, but she actually knew the answer. That was a once in a million years occurrence and Merik Nihar ruined it. She didn't even know his name before he so rudely interrupted her.

She wouldn't even have bothered to ask someone - asshole from third row worked just as well for a name - but she was confronted by another classmate after geography. A very pissed off one at that. Safi knew Vaness by name, because everyone knew Vaness. They'd never talked before, though, so Safi didn't know what to expect.

She was definitely surprised when Vaness verbally attacked her. Well, it wasn't an attack, but what she said was just a pretentious way to say "Go fuck yourself" and they both knew it. Apparently Safi's huffing and whispering to her friends that she was going to kill Merik over "an idiotic thing that doesn't even matter" was making it hard for Vaness to take notes. And apparently calling her a "poor dear" was "condescending" and "rude".

Why had she never talked to Vaness before? She knew now. Caden laughed to her face after having overheard the disastrous conversation. Safi found that absolutely unnecessary. At least Zander and Lev laughed at her behind her back. Well, she didn't know for sure that they did, but she hoped that Levs's so-called reassurance of "I've hidden many bodies before, nobody ever misses the ones like him" was a joke.

"Saf, I'm sure he didn't mean to inconvenience you," Iz said, trying to be reasonable. Safi liked that about her best friend; she wasn't as reckless as Safi herself, but she was definitely easy to drag along to stupid adventures.

"You don't know him."

Iseult rolled her eyes. "Neither do you."

"Irrelevant."

Iseult sighed. She was about to say something else, probably about how it was actually relevant, but Corlant came. Safi wasn't sure what his deal was, only that someone ought to push him off that table he liked standing on to feel better than everyone else. But no, the school encouraged free speech, and Corlant claimed whatever absurd shit he said (Safi didn't bother enough to listen) had something to do with his religion.

Safi didn't know who or what he worshipped, but she personally found lunches without him causing a scene holy. Maybe she should start a religion that specifically opposed him. Or maybe she should take Lev up on that hiding a body offer.

"This is ridiculous," Iseult muttered. Safi personally would have yelled it so he could hear, but she already did and he didn't seem to care. Asshole.

Safi didn't even notice Leopold approaching their table until he sat down. And, he wasn't alone. "Girls, this is Aeduan. Aeduan, Safi and Iseult".

The name didn't sound familiar at all, but Safi had talked to the guy once. Well, it was barely a conversation. She asked for a pencil, and he spent five minutes mocking her for not bringing two. Just when she was about to tell him to fuck off, he handed her the damn pencil. Safi made a point of using it only when she lost the pencil Caden had lent her.

She never even returned the pencil. Maybe that made her an asshole, but she needed something to write with for the rest of the day, and he never even asked for it. How was she supposed to know it wasn't meant to be a gift?

Aeduan uttered out an uninterested greeting, hesitantly sitting next to Iseult. They shared commiserating looks as Safi told Leopold about her encounter with the world's biggest asshole that morning.

"Look! There he is, talking to his friends. I bet they're just as rude and inconsiderate-"

"Saf, those two literally mean the same thing," Iseult said. There was a slight difference, but Safi wasn't about to say that. Leopold was willing to hear her complaints, and she wasn't about to waste the potential this conversation had.

"And besides, you're overreacting. That's Ryber Fortiza over there, and she's pretty nice. I'm willing to bet the others are too. You took this way too personally."

Safi had talked to Ryber Fortiza once or twice, and she knew that Iseult was right. She wasn't going to say that out loud, though. Judging by the look on Iseult's face, her best friend didn't care at all. She went back to her probably dry conversation with Leopold's friend.

"Way too personally? It is personal!" Leopold said. Safi was glad that at least someone knew she wasn't overreacting.

"Thank you!"

Iseult rolled her eyes. She did it so much around the two, Safi wouldn't be surprised if her eyes fell out one day. And she had yet to hear about what Vaness said, even though Safi knew Iseult would agree with most things said.

Suddenly, she remembered something that made her groan. Leopold raised his eyebrows. "I have geography again tomorrow."

Leopold grinned. "Why the disappointment? It's your chance to get revenge."

Safi quite liked how that sounded. Even more than that she liked the fact that Iseult obviously didn't approve of the idea, if her face was to be trusted. She could've been making faces at what Aeduan was telling her, but that didn't seem likely. Leopold's friend seemed to have the same opinion. All the more reasons to do it.

Besides, Safi already had a few suggestions for the revenge plan herself.

Safi smiled, making Iseult shake her head. "What did you have in mind?" [x]

"-And she kept staring at me the whole time, whispering something to her friends. I'm telling you, that girl is insane."

The story didn't get reactions Merik Nihar was hoping for from his friends. Ryber pretended she didn't even hear him, and Cam just rolled his eyes. Merik was pretty sure Tanzi wasn't even listening. That didn't hurt him, because she was Ryber's friend. Stix was asking if 'he was done yet' after every word. That didn't hurt either, because she was like that. At least Kullen was on his side.

He smiled, and Merik didn't know what to expect from his best friend. Kullen often heard what he wanted to hear instead of what was being said. "Maybe she likes you! And, you've never talked about this girl before. Why would you even look at her if you didn't like her?"

Kullen was not on his side.

"It wasn't like that!" Merik said, trying desperately to seem like he was telling the truth. Which he was, of course. Kullen just caught him completely unaware.

Stix grinned. "Oh really?" Merik knew she didn't share Kullen's delusion. She just took every single chance to make him uncomfortable.

Cam and Ryber looked at each other across the table, seemingly not surprised at all that the conversation was taking that turn. Tanzi was too busy copying Ryber's homework to listen.

"Really! The teacher called on her and I knew the answer, so I might have possibly answered instead of her. I wanted to see her reaction but she was just glaring at me and I'm pretty sure I heard her friend say something about hiding a body." Merik realised that the story in its entirety made him look the slightest bit bad, but being perceived as rude was better than Kullen getting ideas.

"Can we blame them, though?" Stix asked. She just raised her hands in mock surrender when Ryber shot her a look. "I'm just saying."

"You did speak over her," Cam reasoned.

Ryber sighed. "That really was rude. No one likes people who do that."

Merik was willing to admit that it wasn't his best moment, but it was really not that big of a deal. Sure, his classmate might be pissed for a while, but that wasn't his problem. His only problem was Kullen, who was grinning at him from across the table.

"You could still like her. Maybe you inconvenienced her just so she would talk to you - that seems like the kind of 'I'm bad at admitting my feelings' thing you would do and call flirting if it succeeded," Kullen said, making Stix laugh.

Well, now Merik was offended. He did nothing to deserve the unjust treatment. Even Ryber was against him, and she rarely cared enough to pick a side. Merik needed to start hanging out with Tanzi; She never listened to him, which meant she couldn't mock him for every single thing like the traitors he once called friends.

Besides, Vivia insulting him 24/7 was enough. He didn't need his friends and his sister to have anything in common. He wasn't sure anyone except Kullen even knew he had a sister. Good.

Vivia preferred solitude, but Merik knew that if Ryber found out, she'd make him ask her to join them. That would likely result in either of the three catastrophes he'd rather avoid:

1. Vivia thinks he's making fun of her for eating alone and yells at him.

2. Very awkward lunches because Vivia yelled at him when he didn't tell her what time it was fast enough.

3. Vivia finds out about Kullen's theory and tells the girl.

The last one might have been a bit of a far stretch if it was anyone else. Vivia, however, wanted nothing more than to ruin her brother's life. The amount of love was mutual.

And, she was definitely the kind of person capable of figuring out someone's name and all social media usernames just from a vague description. Merik dreaded of the day Kullen and Vivia talked alone, without him there to filter his best friend. That would be a disaster. For him, that is. For Vivia, it would be a way to accomplish her mission in life.

"Ryber, control your boyfriend," Merik said.

Ryber just rolled her eyes, which Merik found rather rude. It wasn't like he was the one terrorising Kullen, it was the other way around!

"Look, it's not Ry's fault you were stupid enough to mention it to Kullen of all people," Stix said. Merik didn't know if that was supposed to be an insult to him or to Kullen.

"Mention what? I'm not in love with some girl whose name I don't even know!"

Stix sighed. "You don't have to be for Kullen to think you are. You should know that by now. He only sees what he wants to see." Cam nodded in agreement. 

"Look, are you on my side or are you not?"

"I'm not necessarily on your side, I'm just not on Merik's." Kullen nodded, as if that was a completely reasonable answer.

Merik blamed his trust issues on his friend group, which consisted of Kullen, Cam, Stix, Ryber and occasionally Tanzi. All people who tolerated him but didn't dread to tell him when he did or said something stupid. Except Stix, but Merik doubted that she actually hated him. Either way, she, too, was never going to meet Vivia if Merik was to ask. He usually wasn't when it came to his sister and what she did, but he had to hope that Vivia wouldn't want to do anything with a friend of his.

"That's ridiculous. You hate me for no reason."

"Ridiculous? That's it, you've lost your Stix privileges. It's Stacia for you from now on." Merik fought the urge to tell her that what she just said was ridiculous as well. People lost their 'Stix privileges' at least three times a day.

Ryber rolled her eyes, silently listening to the exchange. She occasionally whispered something to Tanzi, who was still doing her homework.

"Thank you very much for doing as I said and controlling your boyfriend," Merik said. He was getting fed up of everyone being against him for a simple mistake.

"You're welcome," Ryber said, turning to help Tanzi read something. Even Ryber, who was usually the responsible one, was seemingly tired of him. Merik was starting to think he had done something wrong.

Kullen probably noticed that Merik wasn't fighting back, because he sighed and said: "Look, Merik, we're only making fun of you because you don't see that what you did was wrong. Just... Try to be nicer to the geography classmate."

It seemed nice enough, and, even though Merik hated to admit it, it was good advice. But Kullen wasn't done. "And then, when you're a couple, Stix and I will pretend we're your siblings and tell her made-up, embarrassing information."

Ryber took one look at the three of them and sighed. "That might not work."

"Cousins, then."

Ryber rolled her eyes. "That still won't work. Just say you're his friends."

"But no one ever takes the friends seriously!" Stix whined.

"No one should take the two of you seriously."

"Bold of you to assume they won't make all of us do it," Cam said.

"See? Cam gets it!"

Sometimes Merik really hated his friends.

------

Read Chapter Two here

[flsedirection]

‘ GO FUCK YOUR SELFIE ‘ 

                                                                                                  IN THE CLOUD - 

uploading data … ⟳  

    jack of all trades master of none - max caulfield. never moved to seattle, max got to stay and grow up with her friends her parents got divorced and she doesnt see her dad much anymore it must have been a weird domino effect of not moving on. growing up in the cloud max attended CONSTANCE BILLIARD SCHOOL FOR GIRLS in high school max was the girl that befriended her teachers at parties people thought it was a spectacle when she ate an edible and got too honest about people as jokes. the quirky art student that you saw taking pictures at pep rallies and sporting events - living life through the lens of her camera the art in her journal you wouldnt catch her speaking up often in groups of people when she was young. she had flings for girls and guys but shyed away from that most of the time except at parties and occasional dates... sleepovers. she always a step back from life willingly sidelining herself if people didnt drag her into things, she was almost a bit of a welcome mat. gullible and a bit naive with an indecisive nature it was easy for her to just let people take advantage of her because there was the part of her that was nosy and just wanted to get closer. 

now that shes older and attending BLACKWELL UNIVERSITY max has an ache for adventure she loves to go out at night and cause trouble, or for a walk in the woods by herself shes even dabbled in grafitti and bne. you would not call her a trouble maker by any means but there is that underlying want there to document she doesnt let people walk over her the same way they did in the past. shes still not sure in her art in her photography the girl is wishy washy about everything but shes learning to be stronger. shes still corny shes makes jokes like the moths in my head dont let me think, shes pretentious about her polaroid camera and black coffee and better than you indie music, she still the curious girl who swallowed her teddy bears eye just to see if she could. shes better at finding her voice shes trying to live a real life instead of just copying all the personality traits of those around her to fit social norms and breaking down in bathrooms over small things that overwhelm her. you can still find her in the back of classes with her headphones in, inner monologuing, but you can also find her painting in the woods or trying to start a fail tshirt business with her art on it because shes still self conscious, taking pictures of your friends wedding or your five year old sisters birthday party in her free time. 

       THE MEMORIES... ⟳  

she has vivid day dreams of nose bleeds and death following her, the guilt she feels she still feels it all the danger she felt like she was in. it affects her because it seems so damn real it feels like something that happened to her, a girl she loves and cares about dying because of her - everyone she knows and loves dying because of her. the guilt eats away at her... but its not real right? shes not that indecisive right? this isnt her fault, she just cant shake it. it follows her and its so heavy that some days she doesnt even get out of bed. 

       THE CONNECTS... ⟳  

ex gfs - max is mostly into girls though in hs this was probaly more aha i really really like you but i dont know how to actually be your gf so this is the closest thing we will ever get. they probably went out on dates and max did corny things like set up a movie projector in the backyard for them. 

crushes - max while more outspoken now probably wasnt that much in the past so this could be one sided or max never realized the crush and your muse was like?? are you dense in the head or current crushes

fwb/set up dates - max probably is very new to fwb she likes men and women physically and is trying to live life now rather than just being a teachers pet and behind a camera. so hookups would be very random whatever works. 

did u need a photographer - literally any reason literally any just throw it out there she needs money for her black coffee and fucking vinyl records annoying ass. 

roommate - definitely 1 or 2 roommates would be cool she is a messy housemate cups on the bedside table polaroids lefts on the random surfaces shes organized chaos. 

goes out together - for dinner instead of doing homework goes to parties together maybe they broke into a building or like took pictures on the traintracks in the middle of the night. roadtripped or anything. 

like siblings - max has never had a sibling she was raised on only child ( god that explains why she is the way she is ) so i would love someone who is like a sibling to her. 

tried to start something - max has tried to be in a band tried to start a buisness where she like did ink prints of teeth and put them on shirts and tried to sell them. knitting club. book club. roller skating. she tries so many things and gives them up. 

LIKE TO PLOT !!

[rosyerim]

nct 127 as your best friend

taeil

is literally a grandmother

you’re the person he goes to everytime he doesn't understand something slang wise

“y/n,,,mark called me the goat,,,is that good or bad?”

“today jisung called me a bro but i’m not his actual brother, should i tell him?”

also needs you to explain memes to him

“johnny just sent me a picture of a trashcan and said mood should i be concerned?”

“why do you keep sending me kermit pictures, i do not get it”

but he’s the cutest bean alive

hugs you all the time!! hello hug, goodbye hug, i appreciate you hug, all the hugs!!

has the voice of an actual angel

he gets super shy when you ask him to sing but will belt out whatever song you want

also plays the guitar whenever you visit him at the dorms or at practice & attempts to each you

he encourages you to sing with him, whether you can or not not doesn’t matter, he likes it when you two are screeching the lyrics to your favourite song together

loves eating your food, even if you can’t cook, he appreciates it!!

scolds you if you don’t do your homework or leave dishes in the sink, he is a lil granny hehe

johnny

you call him beanstalk so he calls you jack, even if you’re a girl he doens’t care lol, together you’re jack and the beanstalk

sends you memes throughout the day when he has time, he just feels like you have to see them or else he’ll combust

he always messes up your hair whenever you say horton hears a who

makes you tune in to nct night night everynight & will literally quiz you on what he was talking with jaehyun about

always giggles when you hype up his singing voice and dancing

he did’t spend all that time in the dungeon for nothing

whenever you two go out and get separated you just shout “oh daddy” and he’ll find you

almost died laughing when you worse his shoes before, he’s literally bigfoot

has the ugliest photos of you on his phone but he says they make him feel better about himself

but then you just send him his predebut pics and he shuts up real quick lmao

never ask his opinion on your outfit unless you want him to just

*inhale* johNNYS FASHION EVALUATION *exhale*

3am meme wars

literally kills you with his pun, doesn’t matter where you are

johnny, holding up a pie: “hey y/n you’re such a cutie pie!”

johnny, with a bag of candy: “these may be sweet but you’re even sweeter!”

johnny;"if you were a booger i’d pick you first”

johnny; “h-” “say another word johnny seo and i would fucking cut you”

you’re highkey done with him but you don’t know what you do without him

and vice versa <3

taeyong

sometimes you want to smack him because he keeps overworking himself!! & you want him to rest!!! but he doesn’t listen

 so most of the time when he has a day off you just go over to the dorms with takeaway and spend the day watching that anime he hasn’t shut up about

but he loves how much you take care of him (he won’t admit it tho)

he usually comes to you if he has a problem or just needs to rant & you listen every time!!

he loves when you send him random pictures of dogs you see because he misses his own dog ruby

he laughs so hard when you attempt to rap his parts in songs, esp in chain like,,,im convinced taeyong has gills because of how fast he raps

calls you randomly in the middle of the day just because he wants to hear your voice (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)

cutest little man alive, if you’re happy he’s happy, always giggles at your puns even if they’re bad

also brings you with him when he gets a piercing, so he can squeeze your hand 

pouts when you say any member is better looking than him as a joke

“but i’m the center,,,(ಥ﹏ಥ)“ then he brings out the puppy dog eyes so ofc you take it back

he’s also super caring towards you and will fight anybody who makes you sad

yuta

sassiest man alive & will roast tf out of you

but its okay you roast him back so your entire friendship is just insulting each other

but nobody else can insult you, otherwise yuta gets angry >:[ & vice versa

judges you when you wear his jumpers because only he can make it look good

makes you watch anime with him but without the subtitles & unless you speak japanese, you’re going to be bored for ages

tries out shitty pick up lines on you they’re for winwin

all the members aid yuta is like a hot pouch so he lets you cling to him during winter or when it’s cold because he doesn’t want his bestie getting a cold smh

then’d he have to take care of you rip

comes whining to you everytime winwin rejects him but also wont accept your love???

teaches you little phrases in japanese and dies when you repeat them but butcher them 

also asks for your opinion on his outfits & piercings

“y/n should i go with the cross earrings or hoop?”

“neither you’re too ugly”

“not as ugly as you”

you two fight like cat and dog but deep down he’s a total softie for you aw

doyoung

another sassy man but only roasts you if he feels you’re being annoying

whenever you’re sad tho, doyoung makes you your favourite meal & mAYHaps you cried at how thoughtful he is

treats you like you’re his little brother

he pushes you off the couch because he find’s your reaction funny rip

but whenever he goes away on tour he always comes back with hella souvenirs just for you

doesn’t let you near jeno because “you’ll taint him!!” but he gives jeno your number as an emergency contact???

he’ll randomly text you that he’s coming over then show up two seconds later & you two end up blasting bazzi all day while he bitches to you about the other members lol

when you cook, even if you’re good or bad, he’ll always be hovering over your shoulder and telling you that you’re doing something wrong, jokingly

then he’ll eat up the whole dish & tell you it was horrible #justdoyoungthings

judges you silently whenever you bring up an ex he never liked but still lends you his shoulder to cry on if you get upset

if you ever call him sad he’ll be over to yours in about 5 seconds with your favourite snack and let you pick movies for you two to watch

sends you random clips of him singing during the day & gets all bashful when you say you love his voice

you got him a toy bunny for his birthday and despite him saying he hates it, he brings it with him whenever he goes on tour & sleeps w it :’)

jaehyun

marine boy

glares at you every time you call him jeffery

you always ask him wtf is his skincare routine but he just laughs & says “perish :)”

sings you to sleep with his voice actually from HEAVEN because you called him when you had a bad dream & he’s hella smug because you trust him that much(▰˘◡˘▰)

doesn’t get annoyed when you poke his dimple, he’s find its cute how you find it cute which you find cute and you’re both just C U T E

encourages you to tune in to nct night night but will highkey be sad if you don’t 

you two always stay up super late talking to each other on the phone because his voice is so soothing and he thinks the same about you until one of you end up falling asleep like (´﹃｀)

he has so many screenshots of you fast asleep on facetime and he sets the funniest one as his lockscreen, so when hes away he can look at it & remember you’re there for him (⺣◡⺣)♡

lets you borrow his jumpers but only if you really need it like he’s not giving you his tommy hilfiger jacket unless you forgot your own jacket and its -374873 degrees outside lol

also p cuddly with you since he’s so comfortable around you

like you’d just be chilling at the dorms and he’ll lay his head down on your lap & you’ll start running your hand through his hair as he dozes off

or when you two go out to eat he’ll loop his arm your shoulders whilst you walk & wouldn’t even bat an eyelid

you two get mistaken for a couple so much you end up just shrugging it off because lol their opinion doesn’t matter

your friendship is important to each other all thats all that really matters

winwin

only likes getting dotted on by you

when the other members yuta smother him with love hes just ( ¬_¬)

but when you do, he’s like (ღ˘⌣˘ღ)

he attempts to teach you his wushu skills and his cool flexible tricks but you just end up dislocating something lol

he ends up switching to chinese whenever he rants to you & unless you speak chinese you’re basically listening to an angry winwin for about 20 mins

but so long as he gets it off his chest you don’t mind :))

do not let the boy near a kitchen he will literally set it on fire

for your birthday he tried making moon cakes but ended up burning his hand (つ﹏<。)

but you still appreciated the thought & he bought you take away 

he gets a bit down sometimes because of how little lines he has & sometimes he thinks he’s voice isnt that good but you reassure him every time that his voice!!is amazing!!! sm just need to get their shit together sm more like smh

he loves it when you speak to him in chinese, it makes him feel so at home awe

likes to fall asleep on you because you’re the most comfortable thing to him

doesn’t matter where or when because to him

your lap= free real estate

you two also get mistaken for a couple sometimes but winwin just nods hugs you close to prove his point & you two always die from laughter afterwards

he always listens to you though so whenver winwin is moody, taeyong calls you to give out to him so he goes from (-`д´-) to (￣^￣)ゞ real quick

winwin loves you & you love him too

jungwoo

softest boy 

whenever you meet up with him you don’t say hi, you just do his part from boss then he walks away from you lol

you always encourage him to speak up, esp. when he’s with a bunch of people

since he has a habit of copying what people say you say the most complicated words in english

“superkajafrjalisticaxosjdapefwfnls”

“super fuck off y/n”

your entire friendship consists of either eating at your place or eating out at some random all you can eat buffet

super supportive of you even when you do stupid things, you look over at him and hes just d(￣▽￣o) “you do you y/n”

sends you selfies of him so you can fawn over his beauty & tell him which pose suits him best

claps like a seal whenever you say something funny but gets pouty when you make fun of it

super affectionate with you & glares at anybody who comments on it, like jungwoo just wants to be close with his bestie, is that wrong?

is lowkey protective of you like if he thinks lucas is tryna make a move, jungwoo will swoop tf in and whisk you away to the safety of his room

you two end up cuddle under the blankets watching his favorite movie & he ends up dozing off

does aegyo whenever you get mad at him so you can’t really stay mad, he’s just too cute

mark

always goes to your first whenever he writes a rap because he values your opinion a lot & you’re honest with him

lots of inside jokes which just consists of you two giggling to each other randomly

needs you to tell him to take a break because of how much he works

if he doesn’t listen you threaten to feed him sour candy

but you’re super duper proud of your canadian bestie, when he preforms on stage you’re deadass in the crowd like

“thats my bEST FRIEND!!!(´⌣`ʃƪ)“

pouts when he tries to call you & you don’t pick up 

he wanted to tell you about the fluffy dog he saw a minute ago!!

but texts you nonetheless & you wake up to 36 messages describing the texture of the dogs fur and how it barked

but you loved how weird mark was, the weirder he was the more comfortable he was and it was just so cute

doesn't care if you steal his jumpers, he has about 300 but will not let you touch his caps, they are his prized possessions 

he doesn’t even try roast you because of how many memes of him you can send back 

you always tell him how much you miss his ramen hair 

he laughs at anything so you could literally cough and he’d cry from laughing but thats what makes him so endearing

you call him seagull boy to annoy him & it works lol

gets shy when you watch his dance at practice & ends up making mistakes but nobody is mad about it hehe

you also refer to him as long ass ride boy or sing sang sung boy 

he threatens to block you irl 

tries to teach you how to play guitar but you end up purposefully messing it up and he cringes so badly lol

but mark is your best friend and nothing will change that

haechan

he is That Bitch

always comes to you first when he has tea on the members

“y/n bitCH, mArk actually flirted w winwin infront of me, i’m cancelling him smh”

random dance competitions at 4 in the morning are a must, he always ends up beating you （πーπ）

also snaps you selfies of him randomly because he wants you to hype him up

which you do obviously

also texts you almost everyday & keeps you updated on what hes doing

“i’m at a cafe w my hyungs tday!!”

“omg i have a shoot @5am​ i’m going to d i e”

“come over and make me ramen pesant”

buT he looooves when you baby him

before you leave the dorms after hanging out, he makes you tuck him in & give him a lil smooch on the forehead goodnight awee ( ˘ ³˘)

but would die if you ever told his hyungs s you swear not too plus it’s good blackmail for you hehe

you always say “ohmgod its michael jackson hehe” whenever you two meet up and homeboy loves it so he moonwalks over to you

he’ll randomly challenge you to singing competitions of who can hit the highest note haechan and whose voice will break first yours

also cuddles with you all the times, you’re his personal teddy bear & will snap back at the members if they try comment on it

“you’re just mad nobody will let you touch them mark”

the most savage best friend but only lets you baby him aw

[hoshihiime]

Since y’all are sleepin’ on PlatonicKallura/BFFs heres some stuff me n my friend came up with

♡ Delinquent AU where Keith’s the stereotypical loner kid at school and Allura is valedictorian

♡ Everyone is surprised when they head she and Keith are like, best fuckin’ friends

♡ Allura makes Keith go to her family's big fancy family house parties and forces him to wear suits. But also she does his hair and ties his tie, it’s such a process that she needs him at her house probably 2 hours early. Most times she’ll dump him in one of the guest rooms at her place just so she doesn’t have to worry about him sleeping in or being “fashionably” late

♡ The first time he sleeps over, her parents were skeptical, considering he’s a guy

♡ “Oh no, it’s okay dad! He’s gay!”

♡ Keith hates dressing formal, but he helps Allura with her hair and her dress sometimes ♡ They make fun of some of the party guests even though Allura says it’s rude (she’s trying not to laugh)

♡ “...Does….does that guy have fuckin rhinestones on his suit? Allura you told me this was a banquet not a costume party.”

♡ -Allura, trying so hard not to laugh behind her glass- “Keith I will literally hang you by your tie do fucking - n o t”

♡ Keith is a pretty rave girl

♡ Keith brings Allura to raves secretly when they wanna get the fUCK out of the fancy party scene

♡ “...Hey ‘llura, wanna go to a rave?”

♡ “What’s a rave?”

♡ Keith sheds a single tear

♡ Keith helps Allura pick out a rave outfit for their late night shenanigans because he’s NOT letting her walk in there with a cardigan and a dress shirt.

♡  Next day at school Allura feels like absolute DEATH.

♡ Keith pulls out two cans of Monster (green for him, blue for her) 

♡  “I remember what my first rave was like,”  

♡ “Fuck off, Kogane.” She grumbles, cracking open her energy drink.

♡  Keith gasps like a Southern Belle “Oh my, the princess swears! The world is truly ending!”

♡ Allura fucking LOVES going to raves now (specifically with Keith because he watches out for her LIKE A GOOD FRIEND)  

♡ And Keith is a good sport for going to her big family parties. He just thinks she needs some fun after playing proper

♡ Keith sleeps over sometimes when they get back to her place super late. He usually crashes in one of the guest rooms or even on her couch (she has a couch in her room, obviously <<)

♡ The first time Allura goes to Keith’s house to help him study and sees his room

♡ “Keith? Why is there a whole ass pallet of redbull in your room?”

♡ Without turning to look at her, tossing his jacket and backpack into his closet. 

♡ “Redbull gives you wings, Allura.”

♡ Keith makes her a KANDI bracelet that has her favorite colors and little princess crowns on it, she wears it to every rave.

♡ Allura tries making him one, but its a simple red and black one with his name on it

♡ Keith cries - a lot

♡ “Keith it’s okay you really don’t have to wear it I know it’s not as cool as the ones you usually ge-” ♡ “nO SHUT UP I LOVE IT I’LL CHERISH IT FOREVER”

♡ Lance McClain, TA (Allura knows him pretty well), part time DJ ♡  “Oh hey Keith! Isn’t that the guy you like at sch-”

♡  “wHAT? HUH? I’M SORRY ‘LLURA WHAT WAS THAT? THE MUSICS TOO LOUD AHAHAHAHA” -QUICKLY SHUFFLES AWAY- ♡ Allura asks for Lance’s number so they could discuss study sessions together - with Keith

♡  “Oh no! My father wants me home...for...chores...GOTTA LEAVE STUDY SESH EARLY SORRY GUYS CONTINUE WITHOUT ME!” ♡  Keith swears to never help nurse her after-rave drowsiness again (he does)

♡  Y’all didn’t think this came without some angst did you?

♡ Of course Allura’s parents think Keith is a bad influence. She’s got new clothes in her closet, ripped shorts, fishnets, crop tops, etc. She’s coming home late whenever she’s out with him.They’re afraid that soon it’ll effect her school work

♡ They threaten to send her to a private school if she keeps hanging out with him, whICH SHE IS SO NOT HAPPY ABOUT BECAUSE HE’S HER BEST FRIEND???

♡  Allura texts him what happened, she says she’s sorry but she can’t associate with him anymore.

♡ Keith texts her nonstop that night, telling her how thats bullshit, if theres anything he wants him to do to make her feel better - no responses

♡ Allura doesn’t talk to him at school, but only when necessary.

♡ Keith goes to raves alone again, but it isn’t as much fun when Allura isn’t there to make fun of him and point out cute guys hanging around

♡ Of course, not feeling it that night he decides to get outta there and just head home instead. Bumps into a few guys on the way out.

♡ Of course, gets into a fight despite him saying he was sorry and all. 

♡ One of the dudes ends up snapping the kandi Allura made for him, he fucking LOSES IT AND GOES OFF

♡ Keith’s still pissed, but is picking up the beads so he can fix it at home. His phone battery is almost dead, so there’s not much light to help him out. No texts from Allura either

♡ Someone offers to help him out, shining their own phone flashlight on the ground. It’s Lance, the DJ for that night, just finished packing up and heading out.

♡ Lance asks why he’s looking for beads if he could just replace them, looking at all the other various kandis on Keith’s arms.

♡  Keith has trouble responding nicely to that, still looking for the beads his BEST FRIEND gave to him.

♡  Lance doesn’t say much else, just helps out.

♡ Keith makes a mental note to remake the bracelet with a stronger string so it doesn’t break again.

♡ Alluras so miserable without her bestie to help keep her spirits high during family parties, she has no one to make fun of the pompous assholes with

♡ Alluras parent’s notice and when she tells them how important of a friend Keith is to her, they make an agreement. Don’t let him interfere with her schoolwork, and try not to be out so late - or at least keep them updated consistently

♡ Allura and Keith’s reunion at school is the cheesiest shit ever. Slow motion run and hugging with flowers and everything

♡ Allura, sobbing hysterically into Keith’s sweater that he’s worn for 4 days straight “I MISSED YOU SO FUCKING MUCH YOU EMO BASTARD” ♡ Keith, trying not to cry but will probably cry because he;s hugging her back so fucking tight. “I MISSED YOU TOO YOU FLUFFY PINK BITCH.”

♡  Lance, with his phone out silently recording his soon to be bf and the student body pres on the ground sobbing and hugging each other

♡ When Lance and Keith do eventually get together, Allura makes Kandis (Keith has taught her well) for all of them

♡ Keith is so proud - and probably crying again

♡ When security goes “No Entry-” 

♡ “It’s fine, my boyfriend’s the DJ” Says Keith, with a smug smile on his face when he and Allura go to raves now

BONUS:

♡ “Hey Allura, can I copy your homework?”

♡ “Keith, you do realize you’re  speaking to an honor roll student, right? You can’t just-”

♡ “I’ll take you to the club with me Saturday, your favorite DJs playing.”

♡  “Fine, and here’s the notes you missed in English last week while you were nursing your Monster energy headache away.”

IN CONCLUSION: KALLURA AS BEST FUCKING FRIENDS IS VALID.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk. 

[qtyanan]

SF9 ; Friends in the High school Clique

Kim Youngbin

the dad friend

literally gets called dad and accepts it

knows all the secret drama

your go-to if you need advice 

but refuses to help you with homework

“you should have done it last night >:(”

so sweet, so caring

but will break your nose if you hurt his friends

Kim Inseong

the theater nerd

always singing, please shut up

the gayest friend, never in the closet

always on jaeyoon’s arm

hugs everyone as soon as he sees them

always smiling, always cute

seems fake but rly isn’t??

only seen eating pudding

Lee Jaeyoon

the sporty friend

2 cool 4 u, why is he even here

oh, bc he’s attached to Juho

only slightly tolerates inseong - just likes the attention

always going to Youngbin for advice on girls

hates Dawon but begs him for homework help

always either on his phone or asleep

Lee Sanghyuk (Dawon)

lowkey nerd

just needs protection; a smartass that’s gonna get his ass kicked, but he can’t fight

only pays for his own food, “buy your own fucking food”

always stealing his friends’ hoodies

a major tsundere for Hwiyoung

keeps the group chat muted

would honestly be lost without his friends

Baek Juho (Zuho)

brings poptarts to school every morning

always needs help

too dense to realize everyone is whipped for him

“we had homework??”

asks to eat your lunch

makes gift baskets for everyone

just needs a hug

Kim Seokwoo (Rowoon)

sassy mom friend

always hugging someone

disappears for long period of time???

but comes back and no one questions it

lowkey hates youngbin

proud, unbiased bisexual

always has a girlfriend, but just wants Chani to love him back

Yoo Taeyang

no one really knows much about him

but he’s so popular, so pretty

girls pray that he’s not gay

never shows interest in anyone, never does his school work

it’s impossible to hate him, he’s just so sweet to everyone

only dawon hates him, he’s so envious 

secretly in love with Rowoon

Kim Youngkyun (Hwiyoung)

sporty friend #2

first in line to beat up dawon

school’s top fuck boy

but weirdly never has a girlfriend

only speaks when he’s roasting his friends

like youngbin, will kill you if you fuck with his friends

copies rowoon’s homework in the morning before class starts

Kang Chanhee

everyone’s favorite person

but hates everyone

always has his headphones in

always fighting with Juho over food

only tolerates Hwiyoung bc he doesn’t really talk

never wants to hang out after school

no one has his phone number, and he’ll NEVER give it out