#gimme choco

[justastrugglinghotchocolate]

So like a year ago, I made a post asking why Dorian confessed to murdering Basil in the 1891 edition of the book, but not the 1890. For the last few months, while working on tlg and the comic, I’ve on and off again worked on a small animatic for the ending of TPODG. Because of this I’ve had to reread the ending conversation with Henry again and again. And a thought occurred to me:

Is Dorian’s ‘desire to be good’ actually an attempt to stop being objectified?

Dorian’s ‘desire to be good’ is obviously horseshit, even to himself, but why does he do it? "To feel something new" is a lazy explanation especially when the book literally says that “[h]e felt a wild longing for the unstained purity of his boyhood”. He doesn’t want something new, he wants what he had before. But it’s not the innocence of his youth, nor something material he desires—it’s the way people treated him before Henry and Basil.

The thing that always stood out to me was this exchange (occuring after Dorian’s confession): 

“There is someone at White’s who wants immensely to know you—young Lord Poole, Bournemouth’s eldest son. He has already copied your neckties, and has begged me to introduce him to you. He is quite delightful and rather reminds me of you.”

“I hope not,” said Dorian with a sad look in his eyes.”

While many modern adaptations either forget this line or give a charitable reading, to me it reads as though Dorian realizes he’s replaceable. Even though he has a magic portrait and eternal youth, he still is a dying relic of a changing world. He will never be anything more than the innocent, youthful doll society and Henry treated him as.

His confession, to Henry of all people, was a final plea to be seen as more than the dumb youth, as an innocent angel—he is begging Henry to look at him and see that Dorian Gray is a person. That he feels more than youth, or beauty, or idolatry. That he is capable of great violence and even greater crime, like any other man and through that can be capable of evolving with the time like any other. He doesn't want to live as a passing fancy of perverts and naive young people.

But Henry breaks all of that in one simple line:

“You and I are what we are, and will be what we will be.”

But, Lord Henry was never going to see Dorian as a real person. Because Henry himself isn’t real. ‘Lord Henry’ is a role he plays, one that consumed him far before the first chapter. In many ways, his cynical philosophy is his own defective portrait. He hides any semblance of a person in his role of ‘cynical hedonist’ and denies any change. He too is a dying relic of a changing world.

When Henry denies his attempt to change, Dorian seeks Basil’s portrait of him. I think it's quite telling that even after he murder him, Dorian seeks implicit comfort from the man who had idolized his rose-white purity. Basil was the only relationship that was closest to what he had before. But the sad truth is laid bare:

No one ever saw Dorian Gray as a real person. 

He was always a role being played. 

And he dies tragically discarded.

[ethelsilvergray]

This thing inspired by cookies. Not any! We got these cookies for the first place in the local game! Also outfit is inspired by my outfit I was wearing that day. Hope you like this.

Banana flavored...

[hauntingofthelamb]

the fact that when too faced palettes were pretty and cute I didn't have the money to afford them is homophobic

[teethkid67]

wveryone needs to look at her

[babygray]

BABYMETAL - "Gimme Chocolate!!"

[choco-courtier]

I wanna post art I haven’t posted art in three million years

[theladymuses]

❝ — ❞

[protectordraco]

Oh Choco is coming back!!??!

Devsis please gimme his candy this time (and maybe a costume) I beg of you!!

Even breaking out the summoning circle again please!!!

[kimdokjas]

Hi, do you know any fics of joongdok that retains Dokja's sass? Preferably an au because novel angst hurts. Tyy in advance.

OH BOY DO I *pulls up my [redacted number] pages of ao3 bookmarks* this is gonna be long so i'll put it under the cut!

okay so, some of these are a bit heavier on the humor than others, but in general i feel like these fics do a great job of retaining kdj's snarky personality!

Joongdok AU Fic Recs

the pros & cons of caramel by sunwarmed

“What’s in this,” Yoo Joonghyuk demands. “Peruvian dark roast.” Yoo Joonghyuk looks as if he’s about to commit a crime, so Dokja takes pity on him and continues, “And sugar, ice, whipped cream, cookie crumbles, caramel, hazelnut syrup, chocolate, and a little bit of almond milk. Really, I put a ton of work into making this, and you’re not even thanking me.” Yoo Joonghyuk’s eye twitches — once, twice, three times — before he takes the cup and squeezes it so hard Dokja’s a little afraid the drink will fly everywhere. [or: 5 times kim dokja makes yoo joonghyuk (the wrong) coffee & one time yoo joonghyuk returns the favor.]

loving out of tune by almostprimary

After a truly tragic series of events, Kim Dokja gains a new neighbor who also happens to be the only person in the world he would, without hesitation, push in front of a moving vehicle.

you're home by ksalientian

Yoo Joonghyuk is sick. This is not, strictly speaking, a problem, except for how Joonghyuk has never been sick in all the years Dokja knows him other than when he's been actively dying, which he is probably not at the moment, but how is Dokja supposed to know that, he's never taken care of a sick person, Dokja barely even takes care of himself when he's healthy because Joonghyuk is the one doing that most of the time, and now Joonghyuk is sick— Okay, Dokja thinks, staring at the thermometer that reads 39.2°C in cheerful green, this may be a problem.

new activity by oronine

In a strange turn of events, Kim Dokja meets one pro gamer on Google Documents and begins a correspondence.

pretty strangers by HeavenlyDusk

A stranger at a party drags Yoo Joonghyuk around town. Somehow, in the span of one night, he falls in love.

Moving Out of the Closet by Sinnatious

Yoo Joonghyuk meets his neighbour Kim Dokja, who at first glance seems to be living in what he thought was the building's janitor's closet.

two hands of the same clock by furihatachlookie

The hour hand falls upon the fifth hour, and Yoo Joonghyuk dies before the clock can chime in answer. In which a crown prince and a commoner, unaware of one another's existence in this seemingly unbreakable time loop, inevitably cross paths.

"can u tattoo 'i love u' in flowers?" by crispy_scoliosis

In which Kim Dokja, a florist, reunites with his estranged childhood friend, Yoo Joonghyuk.

a new reality with you by fruitastic

Yoo Joonghyuk is a beta tester for the unreleased game “Ways of Survival'' and gets way too attached to a simple NPC, Kim Dokja. When the final battle looms over his head, will he be able to say goodbye? ...Hmm…Maybe Mia was right about touching grass…

to begin again. by frostfall

(In which Kim Dokja goes on a blind date. It's just his luck that he runs into his ex.)

salsa doesn't count as tomatoes by aphrodisiac

Yoo Joonghyuk has a roommate. (And a crush.)

couples discount by anemotions (realdefonge)

When junior manager, Yoo Joonghyuk wins the grand prize of their company’s raffle–a five-day trip for two to Hawaii, all expenses paid–the senior manager, Kim Dokja, who’s had no luck with raffles, asks the junior manager to bring him along as a travel buddy. Yoo Joonghyuk eventually agrees and they go to Hawaii. But things only escalate from there because apparently, there’s a 50% dinner buffet discount for couples in the hotel, and Kim Dokja would to absolutely anything to avail it.

gimme choco (or gimme love) by beewithouthoney

Every Valentine's day, Yoo Jonghyuk's desk is buried in a heaping pile of chocolates. And every year, Kim Dokja gets one from the pile.

on the art of unplanned serenadingby sunwarmed

“Then prove it,” says Yoo Joonghyuk, voice low, and Dokja is struck with a few realisations at once. One — he isn’t a good cook at all. He relies on microwave meals for the vast majority of his diet. Two — when it’s revealed that he’s not a good cook, he’ll almost certainly never hear the end of it. Three — Yoo Joonghyuk has a really nice voice. Goddamnit. [or: kim dokja keeps accidentally asking yoo joonghyuk out on dates. he swears it's only because he likes annoying the hell out of him. probably.]

When I said I hate isekai tropes, I wasn’t sarcastically praying for it to happen to me. by Waltzfor-Zizi(azro_zee)

Kim Dokja wants it on the record that he absolutely loathes those cringey royalty isekai stories and even more so the cliché archetype of cold and murderous but devastatingly handsome black-haired dukes with a troubled past. He really should learn by now that the universe has a hobby to throw him into the lion’s den and make him swallow his own words. After all, he and the God up there do not share the same taste of humor.

there are more but this is getting a bit long orz

i hope these are similar to what you're looking for! if you want any more recs feel free to let me know <3

EDIT: if you're looking for even more recs (and also some of my absolute faves) there's now a Part 2 here!

[hollyhomburg]

I have reached the stage of itty bitty where all I want is choco like gimme something choco or I’m gonna get so so grumpy yes it is a threat

[ask-robokasa-and-rui]

LORE POST//

After preparing everything, the celebrities eventually come to the cafe.

"AAAAAAND-Today! On 'My interviewee!', we have the popular singers Shiraishi and Asusawa with us!!"

H-hello...!

Heya! It's so great to be on this, uhh must I say, podcast!

from the corner

Asusawa Kohane and Shiraishi An coming to the place I work at?! I'm in heaven...

Yeah...They're super cool and just great in general!

In the room

"Well why don't we get something to eat while we interview you?! Waiter?!"

Go!

O-okay!

H-Hello! What can I get for you all?

Do you have any peach buns?

O-Oh yes! A ton!!

How about rum raisin ice cream?

Unfortunately we don't...

Hmm...what kind of ice cream do y'all have then?

Uhm!! W-We have: Chocolate, Vanilla, Strawberry, Yuzu, Mint choco, Cookie dough, Frozen yo-

Gimme the frozen yogurt!

Y-yes of course!

"OOOKAY!!! The we will have 15 bowls of frozen yogurt, 15 peach buns and also 3 large milkshakes!"

Huh?! M-m-ma'am?! A-are you sure? That's a lot!

Y-yeah that's quite too much miss...

Babe, if you have any leftovers let's just pack them and eat them for dinner...

Agreed...we'll do the same for you!

Aww! My hun ham!

W-...Well then...I will be with your orders shortly! Hopefully...

Rui returns the the kitchen area

How did it go?

So...we need to get 15 peach buns ready, serve 15 bowls of frozen yogurt, and prepare 3 large milkshakes...

WHAT?!

Don't worry! You get the peach buns and I'll serve the yogurts! Then we will prepare the milkshakes together!

S-sound like a plan!

Okay! Let's do this!

After preparing literally everything

W-we have your orders!

"Just in time!!"

Hope y-you enjoy them!

Thank you very much.

Thanks you two! I hope we didn't cause that much trouble...

It's no problem!

This is our job after all...!

Well thank you! Kohane! Open wide~!

Aaah...! Nom

Ehehe! Oh! Actually! I have another request!

-!!!

-!!!

O-Oh! A-and what may that be?

Please don't be extreme, please don't be extreme!

Poor guys...We did trouble them..I'll just keep it simple then! Can I have a bottle of water please?

YEEEEEES!!!

Of course! I'll bring it to you shortly!

Thank you! Now where were we...oh right! Open wide!

An, I think you should eat the frozen yogurt since you wanted it so much...

Ehehe!

Tags: @aspenii @a-120 @mai-mai-mai @lurantis1 @bobcross1010 @blankblyke @meringuecream7 @askruikasa-soulssong @tealthingy @delartz @hoooshiiiii @kusanagi-nene-official-mod @scodscod

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - a new #1 for me from Thailand

Nov 2022 Wk 4

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying the most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

609 Bedtime Story (Fri WeTV) 1&2 of 11 - Apparently VIPs get the next episode early. So I watched both. It’s a good story and a great set up and it opens with one of my favorite under appreciated Thai actors: Plustor (as Vee) in a side bartender romance with younger Game. Sunshine bisexual himbo + older tsundere = YES! Gimme! Main character, Mum, is your bog-standard player. (I weirdly love how they translate clubs & bars as “pub” in Thailand - and yes, I get that it ties to the history of the area.) Kinda fun street fight. NO SINGING. Game is BL’s new bisexual king! I will brook no arguments on this matter. Omg kisses already? This is a well paced story! OhmFluke man, can’t knock the visuals, their eye connection and sympathetic chemistry work is good. I never believe they wanna bone but I do believe them falling in love. ALL HAIL QUEEN MINT. 

Between Us (Sun iQIYI) 4 of 12 - This is such a fantastic show. I’m so glad they got OhmFluke back to play sides and support roles, it’s really making the found family aspect shine, especially in contrast to Win’s real family. This one is very complicated and deep and kind of modern. Very much the opposite of UWMA but in a good way. WATCH ALONG HERE.

My School President (Fri YT) 1 of 10 - it’s Love Sick + Korea and Japan's influence. Yes, we’ve seen it all before, but this is me: I never met a high school BL I didn’t want to grant a fair shake. At the very start we get self with a whistle and NO SINGING. Yay! Fantastic beginning. Our tiny music club president/idiot is definitely giving me Noh vibes & our suave student president definitely giving me Phun vibes - bonus this time no girlfriends! It moves this out of Love Sick arena, which was all chaos bisexuals, and into just completely gay. I’m happy with that and I like the dancing and the marriage on his mind. New candidates for one braincell friendship group from GMMTV (they love this archetype). Tinn is already pining and so completely gone. On a completely different aside, I really want a lesbian romance between Gun’s maa and the principle. I have a tiny ship sailing off to one side. 

Ai Long Nhai (Mon iQIYI)10 of 12 - holy crumbs outta nowhere, Batman. Lots of relationship chat not enough shirtlessness, but since I’ve been binging Oh! My Sunshine Showering Night it’s no problemo. Also yes, Nahi does look and act a lot like Joanan, Ai totally ended up dating his mother. 

Remember Me (Sun Gaga) 8 of 12 - Champ’s storyline is dull, although I like the actor. Yay, JaFirst got together!! Cute line, “can we skip being friends and just be in love instead?” LOVE THEM. Please can we take Mean out of that wig now? Why are the straight’s so boring? The Name stuff continues to upset me. 

I Will Knock You (Fri Gaga) 3 of 12 - When these two are sweet together, they are really very sweet and I actually kind of like it. I think Noey uses ter because he’s younger, and doesn’t want to use phi. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

My Tooth Your Love (Taiwan Fri Viki) 9 of 12 - while 609 and Between Us are v good, this is currently my favorite BL airing by a mile. The conversation between the young one and the bar owner made me hoot with laughter. “Are you trying to speak the language of adults?” probably one of the BL’s best put-downs. All the dialogue really: “Are you gonna make him tie himself in a red bow and send himself to you?“ “That’s nice. Can I choose another color?” It’s so fucking cute. The courting with food, and everybody taking photographs of how happy the dentist is. I can’t even with this show. Add the cutest smiles kisses, this is GREAT. I did in fact clap. 

Choco Milk Shake (Korea Strongberry Tues YT) 9 of 11 - Man, this show really makes me laugh so hard. Especially the cat character. I love how they called out the fact that they actually have customers for a change. Jealous Milk made me cackle so hard it scared the actual cat on my lap. How are they going to end this happy? In Strongberry we trust. Just repeat the mantra ABL, just keep repeating it. 

Eternal Yesterday AKA Eien no Kino (Japan Thurs Gaga) 7 of 8 - It takes me a lot to work up the courage to watch this show on Fridays. It’s so sad and traumatizing. But it’s also so good I can’t stop. I have to watch Tooth on either side of it to comfort myself. All that to say, it’s as we all expect: Michan is holding so hard onto Koichi that he has anchored him from death through shear force of will. Also… SWITCHES? Although, does it count if it’s necrophilia? Asking for a friend. 

Oh! My Assistant (Korea Thurs Viki) 1-2 of 8 - This has a very JBL feel (including the title), don’t get mad if I get confused. Anygay, this is a very silly show that acts like it comes from a very silly yaoi. Out gay younger seme (we stan) pretending to be tsundere is smitten by chaos bi uke puppy. And they gave us a very interesting new take on crash into me. It’s racy but in that way Korean does racy, like Love & Leashes. Cheeky racy. 

Happy Ending Romance (Korea Thurs Gaga) 3-4 of 8 - This is such a complicated show about profession, ego, reputation, safety, and trust, but not much about romance. Maybe it’s because I’m so used to Leo portraying evil (see most of his guest MV’s and half of VIXX’s) but I can’t trust his character, and I’m not sure if I’m meant to. Is that the romance? Or is this a romance about an editor’s love for a writer’s work? Or for the writer himself? And is there a difference? Meanwhile, I’m getting a bad feeling about the ending of this one. And yet... How much did I love the dialogue around love and possession? So much. 

It’s Airing But I’m Not Watching It

War of Y (Thai Gaga) 20 eps - it’s just all too much for me.

2 Moons 3 (Thai Mon ??) 10 eps - Possibly a future binge watch. Rumor is it’s banal.

Love Bill  (Vietnam Sat YT) - Bah Vinh is back but I’m too distracted. Also there’s a lot of fund raising stuff going on. I’ll wait and binge.

The Star Always Follow You (Vietnam YT) - same Team RL peeps we have seen before (Sunshine, Stupid) 

Till the World Ends (Thai YT) 10 eps - ?

Why You... Y Me? (Thai Weds YT) 10 eps - It's not primarily a BL, but another meta show about BL shipping, with side BLs. @heretherebedork is watching it, ask them about it. 

In Case You Missed It

To Sir With Love AKA Khun Chai (16 eps) seems to have ended HAPPY! This is a soap opera so next time I have a day off I may binge and trash watch.

GAP the series (Sat YT) is a classic office set romance. WATCH IT! It’s GL and this studio needs our support! I’m enjoying it but not chronicling my journey. (Also, the stairs are back!)

I decided to binge watch Oh! My Sunshine Showering Night. What a wild ride. 

Next Week Looks Like This:

Dec 9: Semantic Error movie (Viki) - the repackage, rumored to have some added footage

2022 still to come?

Dec 19: Chains of Heart (movie? theaters?) trailer Suspense thriller about a forest ranger, smugglers, memory loss, and lost love. Stars Haii (Cirrus in TT2) and Poppy (Porpla in YYY). Adapted from a Y-novel of the same name by TJ Tommy. I don’t know if this is still releasing or if C19 impacted it. Delayed until Feb 2023.

This Week’s Crimes Against Fashion

Between Us punishing their crumbs. 

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

I LOVE HIM. (609) 

I love them! (Between Us). 

Magic crumbs (Ai Long Nhai) 

Truth (Ai Long Nhai) 

Cats.

Me.

Also me. 

(last week) 

[justicerikai]

Charisma House - Superhuman Sharehouse Story “Charisma” - #106 one day

Please read alongside listening to the drama track on Youtube.

Let me know if I missed something!

TL note:

おしるこ (oshiruko) is a traditional Japanese dessert made out of azuki beans, served with mochi.

透明感 (toumeikan) means transparency, but can also be used to mean fair skin.

ふたば通りのたね庵 (futaba-dori no tane-an) is the taiyaki store “tane-an” on the street “futaba-dori”. Futaba means seed leaves/sprout, and tane means seed of a planet. There’s probably some kind of leafy word reference here, I think…? But I am not going to risk it, so it’s mostly kept as is.

Iori: Fumiya-san, what do you want to eat for dinner tonight?

Fumiya: Oshiruko

Iori: I’m asking for dinner.

Fumiya: ….It’s cold so won’t hotpot just do?

Iori: Hotpot again~? Need more burden~ Also Saru-chan and Ohse-san don’t eat much veggies

(Iori picking up the shopping bags)

Fumiya: Iori, gimme one

Iori: I’m fine

(Iori noticing something)

Iori: Hm? Ah, aaaah!!!!

Fumiya: What’s up

Iori: Look at that, Valentines! It’s almost that time of the year!

Iori: Close call, almost forgot. Am I still in that hot spring mood? Get it together you slave

Iori: Fumiya-san, what kind of chocolate do you want this year?

Iori: Hm? Huh? Fumiya-san?

Shop clerk: How long do you intend to carry it with you?

Fumiya: I-I-I-I-I’ll eat it immediately

Shop clerk: Do you need a bag with it?

Fumiya: I don’t need to please just give it like that. How much does it cost. Please hurry I’m being chased by a dangerous man

Shop clerk: Eh?

(Iori appearing behind Fumiya)

Iori: Fumiya-san?

Fumiya: Ah! I told you! He’s here! You were too slow!

Iori: He Doesn’t Need The Chocolate

Shop clerk: Hieh!

Iori: ‘Kay we’re leaving

(Fumiya being pulled away)

Fumiya: Aaah! My choco! Choco!!!! Myyyy~!!!!

Terra: …Ghost-kun, I wonder what kind of clothes fit you

Ohse: Um, you really don’t need to do this. A piece of shit doesn’t need any clothes.

Terra: Amahiko

Amahiko: Yes

Terra: What’s your opinion on this

(Amahiko snaps his fingers)

Amahiko: Perfect, it’s intriguing

Terra: Right? Then I’ll go try it on

Amahiko: …Eh? Terra-san!?

Terra: ? 

Amahiko: We’re picking out clothes for Ohse-san today… 

Terra: Aaah! Crap! I ended up picking clothes for Terra-kun! Be selfless!

Amahiko: Terra-san, I’d say this piece piqued my interest.

Terra: Hm? Oh-hoh

Amahiko: A pinch of sexiness for Ohse-san’s pale complexion. 

Terra: Eh? Why are you like, picking out clothes for Ghost-kun

Amahiko: Eh!?

Terra: Pick out clothes for Terra-kun! What are you doing Amahiko! Get a grip!

Amahiko: No, we’re picking out clothes for Ohse-san today….

Terra: Aaah! Crap! I ended up picking clothes for Terra-kun again!!

Terra: Be selfless! SELFLEEEES!!

Ohse: Let’s just go home already

Ohse: The guilt of using up both of your precious time is making me want to die.

Terra: It’s okay, we’ll definitely find some good clothes. So stick with us a little longer, okay

Ohse: ….

Terra: Alrighty~ Let’s get searching~

(Terra’s voice from inside the store)

Terra: It fits me? Thank you. Though I’d say anything is perfect on me, ehehe, also like---

Ohse & Amahiko: …..

Amahiko: There’s a good person in him, somewhere.

Ohse: I’m aware by now. 

(Sound of the cashier)

Terra: Sorry for the wait~! I bought like, soooo much~! Hm? Huh?

Terra: Ghost-kun, what are you doing here out of all places?

Ohse & Amahiko: ……..

(Both of them breathe in deeply)

Ohse & Amahiko: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEH!?

Iori: Hm~? Ah!

Fumiya: ?

Amahiko: Oh? Spotted two sexy people.

Terra: Eh? Aaah

(They all come together)

Fumiya: Wanna go somewhere else?

Terra: Good question

Iori: Ohse-san, you okay?

Ohse: …Yeah

Amahiko: Tora-san

(Torahime coming at them in a hurry) 

Torahime: Eh? Ah, y-y-y-yes

Amahiko: Any place you would like to go to?

Torahime: Eeeh? No… ah… 

Terra: Anywhere’s fine

Iori: Your wish, sir?

Torahime: Um… um… everyone-…

Bunch of dudes: HAAAAH!? The fuck’s wrong with you! Hey! We don’t fucking know you

Fumiya: Hm? What’s all that noise?

The four of them: Hm?

(PIIIIIIIIIIIII)

Terra & Iori: Rikai-kun!?

Ohse & Amahiko: Rikai-san!?

Rikai: You just littered, did you not. Please pick it up and throw it away at a designated place.

Rikai: Before society tosses the piece of trash that you are out on the streets.

Man 1: Shuddup man!

Man 2: Why do you care!

(The five of them try to stop Rikai)

Man 1: Get that head outta your ass! You piece of shit!

(The five of them apologizing)

(PIIIIIIIIIIII)

The five of them: !? 

Rikai: This area is a no-smoking zone, you imbecile.

Rikai: Or are you so naive you thought you could get away with it because it’s an electronic cigarette? 

Rikai: You wheedling child! Thinking cigarettes will make you mature! When bastards like you still suck on your thumb!!!!!

(The five of them try to stop Rikai)

(PIIIIIIIIIII)

The five of them: !? 

(Rikai slapping the hood of a car)

Rikai: Stop zone! It’s a stopping zone, stop! And you did not stop here!

Rikai: Discard your license if you do not listen to the rules! 

(The five of them try to stop Rikai)

Rikai: Why did no one inform me!? How the streets are full of felons!

Rikai: They’d rather walk with their heads in the clouds! Rikai-oniisan cannot believe this!

(They pick up Rikai and run away)

Rikai: Time has come for me to take my exit it seems. I do not understand, how unbelievable

Rikai: SOMEONE TELL MEEE----!!

(Sarukawa getting the shit beaten out of him)

(Sarukawa coming beaten and battered)

Amahiko: Sarukawa-kun, what happened to you

Iori: Ah! Again!? Geez~

Fumiya: What’s wrong?

Terra: A fight again?

Sarukawa: S’fine, don’t touch me!

Sarukawa: Aah! All of you just shut yer damn mouths! Don’t bother me! Leave me alone!

The four of them: ….

(Sarukawa leaving)

Fumiya: Kei, we got taiyaki

Sarukawa: What’cha say? Taiyaki?

Terra: C’mon, you heard it loud and clear

Amahiko: Let’s eat them together, Sarukawa-kun

Sarukawa: I ain’t gonna eat! As if I fuckin’ need any taiyaki!

The four of them: ….

Sarukawa: Where’s the taiyaki from

Terra: You do want to eat it, see?

Amahiko: Tane-an’s down on Futaba street.

Sarukawa: That one!? That one store that always got them crazy lines!?

Sarukawa: Their speciality is anko! Made with authentic black beans all the way from Hokkaido!

Sarukawa: But the owners from Okinawa!

Terra: You really know your stuff, so you wanna eat it, no!?

Sarukawa: Hell no!

Terra: Just be honest for once!

(Terra and Sarukawa jostling as Iori, Amahiko and Fumiya worry and try to stop them)

Iori: Tora-san!

Torahime: Hweh?

Iori: What are you spacing out for! Come stop them too!

Torahime: Ah, y-y-y-y-yes!

Torahime: Let’s all get along! Right, right let’s all calm down!

(Rikai leaving taiyaki infront of Sarukawa’s door)

Rikai: ….. Saru, I’ll leave some here, okay?

Iori: Eat it before it gets too chewy, you hear me?

Rikai: Good grief

Iori: ….

The two of them: …Hehe… fufufu

Iori: Ah, It’s Ohse-san

Rikai: Ohse-kun, let’s go eat some taiyaki

(Ohse passing them by)

Rikai: Hm? Ohse-kun?

(Ohse going to the entry way)

Iori: Wait, Ohse-san?

Rikai: Ohse-kun

Iori: Where are you going? Hey

(Ohse leaving the house)

Rikai: Ohse-kun? What’s the idea

Iori: Ohse-san, hold it

(Ohse getting into the water)

Rikai: WAAAAAAAAAH!

Iori: EEEEEEEEEH!?

(The two of them chase Ohse into the river to bring him out)

Iori & Rikai: WHY! WHYYY! WAAIT WAIT WAIT WHY OHSE-SAN HOLD IT

(They all end up on the riverbank)

Rikai: ….! What are you doing!

Ohse: Please let me die. This piece of shit messed up yet again.

Iori: Eeeeh!? Messed up what!?

(Ohse getting into the water)

Iori & Rikai: WAAAAAAAAAAH!

(The two of them fetch Ohse out)

Iori & Rikai: YOU CAN’T YOU CAN’T WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS WHYYY GET OVER HEREEE

(They all end up on the riverbank)

Ohse: Please let me drown myself

Iori: PLEASE DON’T DROWN YOURSELF!!

Rikai: Just what in the world happened

Ohse: Terra-san and Amahiko-san graced me with their precious free time

Ohse: And they all I did was soil it with my murky attitude…

Rikai: ….No, I’m sure you’re overthinking it

Iori: It’s these two, remember? There’s a chance they forgot already

Rikai: As you say

Ohse: Really? So then it’s okay, yes

Iori & Rikai: Yep! All good!

(Ohse getting into the water)

(The two of them fetch Ohse out)

Ohse: Please let me die for now! We’ll talk about it after I’m dead….!!

Iori: HIEEEEEEEEEH!

(Sarukawa complaining about his injuries as he gets naked)

Sarukawa: ….! Damnit…

(Sarukawa getting into the bath)

Sarukawa: ….

Amahiko: Good evening

Sarukawa: AAAAAH!!

Amahiko: Hahahaha

Sarukawa: AMAHIKO! I FUCKING HAD IT WITH YOU! HOW MANY TIMES HAS IT BEEN THIS MONTH!

Amahiko: A rut awaits genuine ecstasy.

Sarukawa: DIE! Get out already! Fuck! …!

Amahiko: Aaah, aah Sarukawa-kun aah, aaAAAA!!

Sarukawa: …This fuckin’ guy

(Sarukawa getting into the bath)

Amahiko: Good evening

Sarukawa: EEEEEEEH!?

Amahiko: Fufufufu

Sarukawa: WHAT!? HOW EVEN!?

Amahiko: My new sexy illusions are still a long ways off from perfection

Sarukawa: EAT THIS!

(Sarukawa sprays him with cold water)

Amahiko: AAAAAAAH!! Sarukawa-kun it’s cold! The fresh water of winter!

Amahiko: AAH! AAAAAA!!

(Amahiko suddenly dancing)

Amahiko: Hah, hup, yaaaah!

Amahiko: ECSTASYYYYYYYYY

Sarukawa: DIEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

(Fumiya reading a book)

(Sound of knocking on the door)

Fumiya: Mh, come in

(Rikai bringing a pile of books)

Rikai: Fumiya-san, here, all the books you requested.

Rikai: They’re mainly about resource problems, and there’s essays with the data too. 

Fumiya: Thanks

Rikai: What are you reading at the moment?

(Fumiya shows the book)

Rikai: Energy… so that’s the topic you’re delving yourself into.

Rikai: What’s with the sudden interest?

Fumiya: … 

Fumiya: Ah, my moped

Rikai: Eh?

Fumiya: Y’see, gasoline prices have been on the rise lately, so it made me start paying attention to it

Rikai: Aaah, that. At any rate, it is indeed a big subject that humanity is struggling with

Rikai: I do believe it’s wonderful to show interest in something like this. 

(Rikai leaves)

Fumiya: Rikai

Rikai: ?

Fumiya: …Nah, nevermind

Rikai: It’s almost time for dinner. Please come downstairs when you can.

Fumiya: Gotcha

(Door closes)

(Fumiya closes his book)

(Fumiya takes something he had been hiding on the bookshelf)

(Fumiya takes out the Charisma radar)

Fumiya: ….

(Fumiya puts the Charisma radar away)

(Door closes)

(The seven of them enjoying dinner)

Iori: Ah, that reminds me

The six of them: ?

Iori: Rikai-kun’s birthday is before Valentine’s, right 

Terra: Ah, you’re right!

Ohse: Yes, on the 11th of February

Amahiko: We must celebrate!

(The five of them getting excited)

Sarukawa: Tch

Rikai: ….! Thank you very much

Sarukawa: By the way, Tora

Tora: Eh? Ah, y-y-y-y-yes

Sarukawa: When’s your birthday

Torahime: EEEH!? My… my- asking for my b-b-b-b-birthday????

Sarukawa: Yea

Torahime: ….January… the 19th, but….

The seven of them: Huuuh~...

Terra: So last month, then

Iori: Then when we celebrate Rikai-kun’s birthday, we’ll also celebrate Tora-san’s birthday!

Torahime: EEEH!?

(Everyone getting excited)

Rikai: I’m looking forward to it, Tora-san

Torahime: …..!

The seven of them: Fufufufu… hahaha

Torahime: Haha… Ahahaha

Torahime: Ahahaha…Torahime: Ahahahaha!

[choco-courtier]

fuck it. sotc tournament

[redpiperfox]

won't put this in queue bc

Some Cute Things From Valentine's Day~~

Prof came in with a box, and says "You're all nurses, you gotta take care of yourselves to take care of others, so I got everyone gratitude journals, and I just want you all to write three things at the end of each day that you're grateful for, alright?" and the journals are so pretty and it's so thoughtful of her, and was just very sweet

only guy in our class then proceeds to get up and be like "I feel like we need a dance party!" (Everyone was pretty exhausted) She proceeds to let him dj for five minutes and he plays Gimme Gimme by Abba (the remix version, mind you) and pretends to be a dj, and we're all laughing

I buy choco strawberries when I got with my friend while she buys lunch and I see the valentine's day tables all set up, bc there's four in a box and it'd be a cute to give the fam. I come to the register and the lady goes "Oh, treat yourself, yes, yes love yourself!" so I laugh and say they're for my sister, and she goes "oh, oh." It's only when we walk back that I realize it's because guys are usually getting these for their girlfriends. And I am a girl. Getting it on my own. XD Well, I think it's high time the rest of the world normalizes getting valentine's stuff for people you love, including and especially your family!!

[chansonderoland]

Roland Valentine’s scene & CE translation - Fate/Grand Order

[Let’s see… I’m going to give this chocolate to Roland, but]

Roland A chocolate for me?! Ohh, thank you!

I have no choice but to take it off!

Ye—ah! I got a chocolateeeeeee!

*shakes head* 

[He won’t go that far, right!] [... probably!]

*Roland and Astolfo training* 

Roland Haaaaaaaaaah!

Astolfo Yaaaaaaaaaah!

Ready, set—

Roland !

Astolfo Too late!

[Vulcano Caligorante (Capture Net of Good Fortune)]!

Roland It’s not… too late!

[(The sword got entangled in his arm—!?)]

Astolfo Huh? Huh, huh, huh?

Roland …. Mmmmmmmmh…!

Astolfo Wa, wa, wah. Wa, wait—

Roland Hahaha, there’s no way I’d wait!

*loud crash* 

Astolfo Uhnyah—!?

Roland It’s the difference between our strength and our tactics. The only thing in your advantage was your timing.

As long as I know how to handle that, the rest is easy.

Astolfo Uuhh….

Roland Even if you look at me like that, it’s still the truth—

Astolfo You’re right!  Then let’s go one more time!

Master’s here now, so I won’t lose this time! 

Roland Oh, Master. My bad, my bad. What is it?

If it’s training we can do it together… 

[Roland, here you go!]

Roland ?

???

Astolfo Roland has the same expression as a cat that has seen something strange…

It’s choco, y’know, chocolate!

Ah, Master. Please gimme one too!

[I’ve already given you one] [Sorry, I’ll give it to you next time]

-> [I’ve already given you one]

Right, right! 

… will you give me another one? You won’t? You won’t, huh—

-> [Sorry, I’ll give it to you next time] 

Yay, I’m looking forward to it!

Astolfo So, Roland, what’s wrong? 

Roland Um…. no. I just don’t know what I should do.

Don’t get me wrong!   I’m really grateful! There’s no doubt about that!

However… You need to give something in return for Valentine’s, right?

I just can’t think of anything to give you in return for this favour…

[(He’s more serious than I thought…)]

Astolfo Uhmm. Well, anything other than stripping is fine, right?

I’ll go train with someone else while you think about that! 

*Astolfo leaves* 

Roland Hey, wait, Astolfo! Let’s think about this together!

Geez. He really left, huh…

Uhm… Master. Is there anything you want?

If it’s something I can give you, I’m ready to give you anything!

Though it’s impossible if it’s something I don’t have…

[Anything is fine]

Hey, that’s cold.

It makes it harder for me if you say that.

Ah, but wait a second. Hmm…. it can’t be helped. I’ll bring out my best!

[Your best…?] [Your best…] 

-> [Your best…?]

Yeah, my best!

->[Your best…]

Roland Yeah, in other words— My best birthday suit!

Roland I know what you’re thinking, but that’s not it. 

*Roland kneels* 

Roland My Master. No, at this moment, my King!

I dedicate my fealty and my oath,  and my chivalry to thee.

[Huh!?]

Are you dissatisfied?

[No, not at all!]

*Roland gets up* 

Heey, I’m just kidding, just kidding!

I’ll give you something more concrete when we get back!

Like QP! Or golden fruits!

*slap* 

Eh, that won’t do either?

That’s hard… then, I have only one thing left…

— should I take it off?

[This is enough—!]

Okay, understood!

Ah, but even if it’s not a return gift for the chocolate, my fealty and oath are real!

You can trust me on that! See ya!  

*Roland leaves* 

[My knight, huh…]

—

As a knight

A return gift from Roland.

Well, for me as a servant, even if another master shows up— For you, I’ll be your one and only servant.

So even if my king is here, as a knight, there is no doubt to whom I should give my allegiance to. My dear, esteemed Master. On my life and on my pride, I swear in this moment that I shall protect you with all my heart and soul.

Hahaha. Did I manage to seem like a knight for once?

— more than enough.

— 

TL Notes: 

I am no expert in Japanese, and I would have never attempted to translate this scene if it wasn’t dubbed. Take it with a grain of salt and feel free to disregard as soon as something better comes up. I tried to make it as natural as possible, but I’m not a native English speaker either, so if you think it’s weird, it probably is. 

Anyways, thanks for reading and please remember to give your Roland a chocolate.