#getting offended over dumb shit
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sukunastoy · 10 months ago
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Um, what?
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This generation is “psychologically damaged” cause of uneducated asshats like herself that most likely beat her kids into submission and played off any problems as the child being “attention seeking.”
Fat yikes.
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tariah23 · 6 months ago
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Now he’s trying to lie when he literally tagged Princeton like 5 fucking time. White people are so evil, bro. They always know what they’re doing when they do shit like that. With the attempt to bring harm to Black people who they want to “get out of the way,” because they don’t think that we belong in the same spaces as them while at the same time, believing they should be allowed INTO our spaces and afforded hospitality and a whole red carpet rolled out. The sad thing is, she has connections to the industry because of her uncle and name so what if this was just a random Black woman who worked for Princeton without this kind of protection at all
?
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#I’m glad that she’s alright though#why is he trying to dumb down what he intended by saying that ‘she was trolling so I trolled back’ like she like many other black people#are always dead serious when we tell whites and nbs to stay out of black folks business#simply put#he just got offended since a black woman told him to stay in his own lane#he dumb ass didn’t even know who she was even though he’d interviewed her family multiple times before#a Russian making millions off of black culture what a joke#black people gotta be tired of being used#one day man#the sad thing is of course black men hate black women sm that they were defending vlad on his behalf (not surprised lol)#and I saw other black women being pick me’s going on about ‘what makes her SO much more special than other black people-‘ like are you
.#do you bitches have rocks for brains or
 these same people are the reasons why nbs and whites will always feel comfortable coming into our#shit and wrecking the place you guys don’t stand for anything and you allow others to trample over your own people#stand up one day#the sad thing is#ppl are still gonna go onto his platform to allow him to interview them and make money off of their name#this is one of the first times that I’ve seen black people really get in vlad’s ass though because what he tried to do to this black woman#was absolutely vile and this is the kind of shit that gets black people killed and put into bad positions#fucking loser#rambling
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deadghosy · 4 months ago
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☆BEING MATTHEO’S CHILDHOOD FRIEND TO LOVER ☆ male version||female version
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COMPLETELY protective over you ever since childhood. He literally fought a kid back then because they didn’t like that you were a “girl” playing boy games with them. You were sensitive back then, so of course you cried to mattheo about it. And mattheo did something about it. He punched the kid and stole their teddy bear to give it to you.
He asks you about girl things so he can flirt and treat a girl better. You could be literally reading a romance book, and he wants to learn too. Please teach him or else he’s gonna whine about losing another girl.
“Sooooo what does a girl like for a guy like me to tap that ass
cause I got a girl on my roster..” mattheo says sliding by you in the library table you sat in. You were literally getting to the good part of where the two main characters were gonna kiss. “Why are you asking me these questions riddle
” you say with venom in your tone towards his last name. Mattheo frowned. “Actually my name from you is Matty, Matt, and matty bear. So please—”
“—Please kill yourself and never let your soul rest after.” You say getting up from the library table and walking away. Mattheo’s jaw drop as he followed you offended. He never interrupted your reading time ever.
When your period comes
he’s asking you “what the fuck that is” and “why is it hurting you” with a frown. He’s thinking he can solve it like any other with a wave of his wand
but it’s more complicated when you explained how your uterus is shredding itself and that’s all you can get out before mattheo started to gag and leave your dorm room like the overdramatic king he is.
He still loves you dearly so he got you tea and some materials you need for the rest of your week.
Sometimes when you two have a sleepover, which is just either of you two sneaking into the girls dorms or the boys. You two gossip like little girls ready to rip someone’s heart out.
Mattheo is 50/50 on you doing makeup on him. But if you really plead and want to do it. He’s gonna let you. He can’t say no to you sadly.
A guy had broken your heart once, so he broke his face in
and broke his dick. Don’t ask.
Couple of girls hated how close you were to Mattheo. He’s a handsome guy, so of course people may spread rumors around. And Mattheo doesn’t really like that, he’s going to the girl and showering her how equal rights have hands.
If you two ever argue, it leads to Mattheo apologizing first. He’s a sucker for you, he doesn’t know why. He just doesn’t want you to be mad at him.
It’s even worst when you talk to anyone else than him.
When you fully ignore him, no texting, no calling, not even talking to you in public and being by you makes him go insane. He’s smoking in the courtyard. Jaw tightened as he eyes you across. He can tell that you know he is staring. He can tell you know indeed when you shift a lot.
The way you feel his burning gaze on you, it made you feel warm. You always loved mattheo, but with him always “going after” girls
you just thought that maybe he wouldn’t love you back.
Jealousy is something mattheo has built into him. He doesn’t know why, so when a ravenclaw student tried to ask you out. He couldn’t stand it. He had to take you away. He couldn’t bare to lose you. He ushered you away from the student, taking you to an empty classroom. He couldn’t handle not being near you, he hated it the most. You are his other part.
He hates it.
“I don’t know who that guy was. But you’re mine. Okay? You’re mine, you always have been even if we both didn’t recognize it. Shit, I know I’m dumb to think to just push my feelings away from you. But I can’t help but love how you are so amazing
” he says slowly at the end. Kissing your head and closing his eyes. You smile slowly. Your heart swell with warmth, taking a deep breath in as you wrapped your arms around him too. You loved him just like how he loves you. He loves you as if you were the made the creation of his favorite food. He loved you like making new potions. He loved you like music to his ears.
He always has been a gentleman before you two dated. He made sure he opened doors for you. He made sure you were comfortable with things. He would even sacrifice his cloaks if you were cold.
He’s like a puppy in love as he just lights up seeing you.
He loves his girl very much. You are the prettiest thing he could ever ask and give for.
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star-sim · 10 months ago
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"is your girlfriend single?" ☆ enha maknaes
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☆ youtuber! non-idol! bf! enhypen maknae line x fem! reader ☆ summary: when your youtuber boyfriend finally shows you for the first time to his audience. ☆ genre: fluff, very dumb, jelly boys ☆ warning(s)? no! ☆ ygs seemed to like the hyung version so here's the maknae version!! reblogs and comments are appreciated <3
hyung ver.
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sunoo ☆
OKAY HEAR ME OUT
this one is gonna be a lil different
paranormal investigator sunoo
he's like buzzfeed unsolved
and for one of his seasons, he goes and investigates haunted places and reviews their histories yk?
for the season finale
sunoo visits the bellaire house, which is notorious for being super haunted and ghost-infested
i like to think that sunoo is honestly skeptical abt ghosts
like he definitely has tried to talk to them, but hasn't discovered anything conclusive to definitively prove the existence of ghosts
anyways because it's the season finale
sunoo has a special guest...
you! his gf!
i think he'd be low key about your relationship, but his viewers know who you are
the video starts off normal
sunoo gives a rundown of the history of the bellaire house, like when it was built, the people that lived in it, the strange occurences in there, etc
the bickering between you and sunoo as you go over the bellaire house is very cute and sweet
it definitely makes it into those "sunoo and [name] being a comedic duo" compilations aw
anyways now its time to investigate the bellaire house head on 😈
sunoo pulls out all his cool ghost-catching gadgets
he tries everything
like the thermal camera, EMF meter, even the goddamn magnetic field detector
sunoos getting annoyed bc why are none of the ghosts talking to him :(
on the other hand
you're clinging onto him, hiding behind ur bf scared shitless
i mean like.... why would you not the bellaire house is known for having DEMONS 😭😭
sunoo huffs and turns to the camera, "welp it looks like there's no ghosts here"
one of the people in his camera crew suggest having you ask instead of him
even though youre scared you do it for ur bf
you're like "hi ghosts..... if you're here with us... please flicker the lights"
.
.
.
THE LIGHTS BEGIN TO FLICKER AAAAAAAA
AND SUNOOS HYPED OUT OF HIS MIND
"BABE BABE BABE ASK THEM THEIR NAME"
so youre like "ghosts... whats your name"
and NO JOKE
A WIND BLOWS PAST THE ROOM
AND EVERYONE IN THE ROOM SWEARS THEY HEAR SOMEONE WHISPER FAINTLY
"robert"
so that's how you and sunoo meet robert the ghost
BUT THAT'S NOT THE END
BECAUSE SUNOO HAS THE BRILLIANT IDEA OF PULLING OUT HIS OUIJA BOARD
tbh you both look dumb as hell
sitting on the crusty bellaire house floor
hunched over a ouija board
sunoo is now asking questions
but the ouija board doesn't even move
but when you ask
"robert, how are you today? yes for good, and no for bad"
THE GODDAMN PLANCHETTE MOVES TO YES AKA GOOD 😭
you and sunoo then introduce yourselves
again, when sunoo introduces himself nothing happens
but when you introduce yourself
the candle that's lit beside you goes out
someone in sunoo's camera crew jokes that they think that robert the ghost likes you
so sunoo jokingly asks "robert are you flirting with my girlfriend?"
AND THE OUIJA BOARD SAYS YES 😭😭😭
and when you kiss sunoo the doors in the house start slamming and shit like SOMEONES MAD
sunoo is lowk offended
and then he starts to beef with robert the ghost
except robert the ghost never respond to anything that sunoo says
bro leaves sunoo on heard
sunoos like "HEY ROBERT I DON'T CARE IF YOURE A DEMON YOU BETTER BACK THE FUCK UP!!"
later when ygs review the emf recorder it picks up robert the ghost whispering "i don't care 🙄"
sassy ass ghost
on the other hand
robert responds to EVERYTHING you say
atp you're not scared anymore
"hai robert i'm [name], knock over that doll over there if you want to be my friend"
and the doll knocks over 😭
"robert knock on the window if you think i'm cute :3"
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
the camera crew is just laughing their asses off
at some point
the ouija board starts moving on its own
everyones like WOAHHH IT'S ACTUALLY MOVING!!! QUICK GET A PIECE OF PAPER SO WE CAN RECORD WHAT ITS SAYING!!!
sunoo is taking such dilligent notes
it starts with i, then s, then it spells out your name, and then s, i, n, g, l, e
" ' IS [NAME] SINGLE' ???"
is what the ouija board says
yes a goddamn ghost just asked that
SUNOO IS NOT HAVING IT
while you and the camera crew are cracking up
sunoo starts telling off robert
"listen bro just because you died in the bellaire house doesn't mean that you can try to take my gf 😐"
robert the ghost is being sassy too
so sunoo literally just snaps the ouija board in half
"haha you can't talk anymore robert .😐."
yk how in buzzfeed unsolved they take turns staying in the haunted place alone with all the lights off
sunoo kicks everyone out so that he can have a "man to man" talk with robert
robert isn't a physical person but everyone swears they hear crying
.... and it sure isn't coming from sunoo 😇
i think this would go really viral
"[name] is so beautiful that even dead people want her"
"robert the ghost is so me"
"even ghosts aren't immune to beautiful women"
"robert saw a hot woman and took his chance"
this would become an inside joke within sunoo's fandom fs
sunoo isn't having it though
he definitely still tweets about it
"i remember when some loser ghost tried to take my girlfriend"
"robert fuck you i'm glad you died"
"see you hell robert"
i def think robert is scared of sunoo now
LMAO
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jungwon ☆
jungwon is documentary youtuber
he likes to make short documentaries about topics that he likes
kinda like wendigoon or fern or real horror
i feel like he'd have a super high quality mic that's super crisp
i think he'd like to make iceberg videos, or videos about obscure missing people stories
anyways
jungwon has a whiteboard that he uses to explain things
esp like timelines
but in one of his videos he doesn't use the whiteboard so it's in the background
so you write a little message on it
its just a very simple
"[name] was here :3 !!"
i feel like only a few people notice it
but as more and more videos pass
and jungwon doesn't use the whiteboard
your little messages get bigger and bigger
until one day the entire board is filled up with just "[NAME] WAS HERE!!!"
sorry i think a lot of jungwon's viewerbase would be redditors, just given what his content is like
r/jungwon LMAAOAOAO
on there someone brings it up
theyre like "who is [name]"
some ppl suggest that it's probably a friend or his gf
it's pretty chill tbh, his viewerbase isn't really too concerned
until one day
jungwon does one of those investigating 411 missing persons cases
except ygs live near one of the places where someone went missing
so he's physically walking along the path where someone went missing as he tells the story
poor baby is lowk kinda scared tho so he takes you along with him
youre mostly behind the camera but you do talk
at the beginning of the video he's like
"hi guys i'm joined by my girlfriend today"
you pop into frame to say hi
anyways like i said you do talk during this video
like as jungwon tells the story you're reacting behind the camera
"it's crazy that a 4 year old traversed 30 miles up a mountain in a matter of 30 hours..."
and behind the camera you're like "omg no way that's wild đŸ˜±đŸ˜±đŸ˜±"
youre like genuinely invested
you're also cracking a lot of jokes w him too
its really sweet bc most of his videos jungwon is alone, but since youre in this w him, he's smiling so much ;(
and like everytime he makes a joke you can see him looking off-camera to look at your reaction
and when you laugh everyone can literally see how proud he is
this video so SUPER well received
his comment section is so sweet
"i've never seen jungwon smile so much, he's so in love with [name] :("
"the way you can tell jungwon is proud when [name] laughs at his jokes"
but i think the most common type of comment are those type stamp ones
"at 1:23 [name]'s laugh is so cute!"
"0:58 when the camera panned over to [name] my jaw dropped... she's gorgeous!"
"5:29 [NAME] IS SO FUNNY I LOVE HER"
"at 4:40 i love the way [name] completes jungwon's sentence, i've never seen two people that are just so perfect for each other"
yk how on youtube there's that feature where you can see the most replayed part?
when you pop into frame that's the most replayed part of his video 😭
his viewerbase on reddit probably posts you
like its a screenshot from the video and theyre like "it's [name]! the one on the whiteboard!"
i think his fanbase would be really nice on reddit too :(
"she's so pretty!"
"jungwon has immaculate taste"
indeed he does <3
he's so proud of you, like i think he definitely looks at the comments and screenshots them to keep reading them
like YES THAT'S MY GIRLFRIEND
HOWEVER
jungwon makes those "going through my subreddit" videos
and he comes across a post hyping you up
at first hes liek "YES YES YES MY GF IS SO BEAUTIFUL"
but then the comments on the post are like
"she's so beautiful, do ygs think she's single?"
"hi [name] 😏 (i am the ceo of amazon and read feminist literature books btw)"
obv all jokes
and jungwon's face visibly drops
he gives the camera a MAD side eye
a STINK EYE
jungwons like "all right, who said that đŸ€š"
AND THEN HE REPORTS AND BANS THEM 😭
he makes posts on his subreddit like "all of u are going missing next time i see shit like this"
HELP
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riki ☆
sorry he's a shitposter
i think riki posts those genshin impact and fortnite playthroughs
but he also posts other gamer things
but he actually has a good fanbase
he's at like 900k subscribers even though he doesn't have a fixed upload schedule or specific genre of post
he's never showed his face like ever on his channel, but he definitely shows his personality through editing, video descriptions, and community posts
one day though
riki randomly posts a video titled "me and my girlfriend at the arcade"
and its a video of you and him on an arcade date :(
the majority of it is him behind the camera recording you as you play games
the way you can hear him chuckling behind the camera as you have cute reactions :((((
but there's also times where he's on camera
like when he's playing with the claw machine
and bc riki is a pro
he wins a you giant teddy bear!!
your cute lil cheers when he wins are like the most replayed part of the video
he takes such cute pictures of you hugging the bear aw
honestly his viewers are surprised when he posts the video
bc he used to be posting genshin impact videos why is there a vlog
but theyre not complaining
this video becomes one of his most viewed
since youre most of the video there's a lot of comments abt you
and i think his audience is close enough with riki to shit on him LMAAOAO
"[name] is so sweet i wanna hug her"
"i wish i was a teddy bear..."
"SHE'S SO CUTE"
"move aside riki"
"is [name] single by any chance"
"omg who is that weird random guy (riki) that keeps coming near you [name] is he bothering you queen"
"[name] who is this random guy are you cheating on me"
riki responds to these comments too
"you can't have her" "too bad she's lying in my arms right now" "she just kissed me" "do want want my girlfriend or a black eye"
he definitely starts fights
i think his video is so viral that he gets ppl outside his audience
and some ppl get mad when riki fights back 😭😭😭
“why is he fighting people they’re clearing joking” and riki responds like “yeah why is he fighting đŸ€ŹđŸ€ŹđŸ€ŹđŸ˜ĄđŸ˜ĄđŸ˜Ąâ€
and then riki gets petty
and makes a video called
"addressing everything."
its like a logan paul apology video
it's also like 30 seconds 😭
"hi all... i just wanted to come here and apologize... for having a HOT GIRLFRIEND" and then he flips off the camera and it cuts off with you saying "babe?--"
lowk goes viral for it LMAO
behold the keyboard warrior trilogy- heehoonki ☠
in the future riki does post more of your cute vlogs
and in the descriptions he's just ranting abt how much he loves you
lowk all the vlogs are basically just him admiring you
cuties
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heavenlymorals · 6 months ago
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Details that I've noticed about Arthur Morgan-
-He, for the most part, despises male touch, especially if it's overly affectionate. He gets tense anytime a man hugs him and wants it to be over as quick as possible (Jamie, Mickey) and he looks visibly offended when Professor Bell touches him. He even sometimes gets annoyed when Dutch touches him on his shoulder, someone who he considers a father figure.
-On the flip side, he does not mind female touch at all. He even initiates it sometimes (Tilly, the girl at Beaver Hollow). Now one could argue that they were high stress situations, but if Tilly was a dude, he would've just set her free, make a snide remark, give her a gun, and then he'd expect her to help him with the fighting. He is completely cool with the nun giving him a hug and doesn't get offended when Mary Beth touches his hand in their therapy session.
- He seems to be pretty well read. He knows Shakespeare, with Romeo and Juliet, and Icarus. He makes other literary references. This is probably due to Dutch. Dutch is clearly very well read and cultured. However, Arthur seems more interested in practical works like guides then philosophy and stories, given that the only book he has on his tent desk is a plant guide.
- He's great at remembering faces and less so on remembering names.
- He does have an amazing propensity to remember physical features, like how he is able to create amazing portraits of the people he meets without consistent reference. It's incredible and works back to the whole great at remembering faces thing. Same goes for animals.
- He is very curious. He is always touching things, looking at things, critiquing things, and trying to understand how they work.
- He generally refuses to be emotionally open with men and does it only with women- this could be due to the idea of the Cult of Domesticity. I've made a post about it before. Compare him speaking with the nun to Reverend Swanson. Compare him speaking to John about Dutch leaving him to him speaking to Sadie about Dutch leaving him.
- He is very connected or is fond of artistic people. He and Mary Beth talk about their journals. He is fond of Albert Mason's photography and helps him out. He is interested in Charles Chataney's artistic work, even if he doesn't like it or connect with it.
- Since a lot of camp members respond to Arthur's antagonizations with something like "not again" or "I knew I'd be next", it's safe to assume Arthur will go off on people from time to time, regardless if you play high or low honor.
- Does not have a fixed temperament. In some missions, he is more energetic and in others, he is more downtrodden. Very realistic and I fucking love it.
- Has direct eye content at all times- will look anyone in the eye and does not give a fuck. NPCs will look away from him if he stares at them.
- Gets mad when men don't behave like men, especially when it concerns women. He gets pissed at John for not stepping up and being a man to his family. He gets annoyed and even pissed off when asking why Beau couldn't have helped Penelope Braithwaite as she is his woman.
- Given how the camp falls to shit whenever Arthur isn't donating, we can safely conclude that Arthur is the most valuable member of that camp, bar maybe Hosea and Dutch.
- He is very reminiscent of the Dark Romantic, which is really interesting as a lot of times, it can be looked at as the middle ground between Romantacism and Realism, two ideologies that were very popular in the 19th century. I will make a full analysis regarding this later.
- Introverted, but not shy at all. In fact, he's very charismatic and is just as good as dealing with people as Dutch and Hosea (The Riverboat Mission) This 'dumb, mumbling' cowboy thing he's dumbed down to in the fandom is an insult to his character.
- He probably acted like a father figure to Jamie Gillis when he was still with Mary, given the fact that he taught him how to ride a horse. Will probably also make a full post about this later.
- Some people say that Arthur is around 5'10-11. Others say He's 6'0-3. Whatever his height actually is, he's still way taller than the average man during this time period, who was around 5'6. Now imagine that with muscles and armed to the teeth- fucking terrifying.
- Very sentimental. He keeps a photo of his supposedly no good Pa and wears his hat. He keeps a photo of his mother who he doesn't really remember at all. He keeps a photo of his dog, a horseshoe that probably belonged to a dead and beloved horse. He keeps a flower from his mother. Keeps a photo of Mary as well. If he had a photo of Isaac, he'd probably keep that too.
-Arthur died at 36 years old from Tuberculosis if you play high honor. The real gunslinger and outlaw Doc Holliday died at the same exact age and the same exact way.
- Genuinely doesn't give a fuck about movements, social issues, and cultural issues, but does care about individual people.
- I love him
- So fucking much
- 😃
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angel-of-the-moons · 23 days ago
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I'd adore seeing something with Eddie and Venom being your big fuck off bodyguards at the Halloween party, bonus points if the costume is just venom!
Spooky Scary... Slime-Monsters?
Eddie x Venom x Fem!Reader
TW/CW: None!!
Dividers by @saradika-graphics
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They met you in an alley, one night. The rich inheritor to some firm or another, cornered by a bunch of no-good (tasty) thugs.
Contrary to most people, you didn't run when Venom beat the shit out of, and promptly ate the heads off of your assailants. You were... Surprisingly open-minded? Eddie found that Venom liked you, and he'd be lying if your understanding of their situation wasn't refreshing. It was nice having someone other than his ex, or Ms. Chen to talk to about this sort of thing.
But when you hit them up to be a bodyguard to a freakin' Halloween party, of all places? He was hesitant, at first. But rent and groceries were kind of expensive... And you were offering quite a bit.
So, they took the offer. They met you, once again, in an alley.
The ground shook softly as Venom landed nearby. His maw stretched into an eerie grin as you gasped in shock before realizing just who it was.
"Oh! You're here!" You sighed with a relived smile, adjusting the little witch hat on your head, "I was starting to get worried."
"Yes, well... we wanted a snack so we grabbed some... fast-food on the way in." Venom replied with his deep, rumbly voice.
"Please tell me you cleaned up before you came here." You replied, scrunching your nose rather cutely.
"Of course, we aren't savages." Venom snorted, crossing his arms over his broad chest and staring down at you; almost offended you would suggest he wouldn't clean himself of the evidence.
"Oh... Well, good." You said in reply, "Did you guys pick out a costume?"
Venom frowned--pouted, really, before rocking his head from side to side. "Eddie said costumes are dumb."
The way he stretched out the last word reminded you of a petulant child mocking their parent, and it made you smile.
"So... I guess you're going as you?" You suggested.
Venom's opalescent eyes widened for a moment, like he hadn't thought of that. As he opened his mouth, a part of his face peeled back and Eddie's own face appeared; and he did not look thrilled.
"No--"
"Yes!"
You couldn't help the giggle that came from your lips as they argued back and forth. But eventually, the symbiote wins out in the end.
And so, that's how you walk into the club, arm-in-arm with Venom.
It shocked people, to say the least, but in some cases, when people got too close, Eddie and Venom were great at pretending he was some sort of expensive, animatronic suit. A few people even stopped for some photos!
The party was a droll thing at first, slow and boring, even for a rented nightclub. But a lot of these people were friend of your parents--very few really knew how to actually have fun. Even the younger people they paid to be with for the evening seemed bored out of their skulls.
That was, until Venom had hopped on stage. He had managed to load the DJ performing into playing something a little more lively--to "get the blood pumping". Apparently, nobody but you got the morbid joke.
His ploy worked, and people began to go down to the dance floor. Well... the ones young enough to avoid breaking a hip, anyways. The older ones complained about the music tastes, but your parents, the hosts of the party, clapped Venom on the shoulder and thanked him for saving the evening.
As you all sat down to enjoy cocktails, you explained that you'd hired him as your bodyguard. When asked what had happened to your primary one, you explained that after he left you alone long enough to get robbed the night you first met Venom, you decided it was a good change of pace and protection. Your parents wholeheartedly agreed.
However, neither of you were prepared for when your dad shook Venom's hand and asked the dreaded question:
"So... Are you interested in dating our daughter?"
You wanted to die on the spot.
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kitten4sannie · 9 months ago
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ᮀ ꜱᎍᎀʟʟ ᎀᎅᎊ᎜ꜱ᎛ᎍᎇɎ᎛
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ᮀɱᮇ ɱᮀᮘ/ᎀ᎜ʀᎀʟÉȘꜱᎍ ➠ ÊáŽ‡áŽêœ±áŽ€ÉŽÉą
pairing: personal trainer! yeosang x fem! reader
genre: pure smut
summary: you love your weekly visits with your personal trainer. he always stretches you out just right.
w.c: 2.4k
warnings: mean(ish) dom! yeo, sub! reader, 15 year age gap, seduction, teasing, sir kink, dirty talk, praise/degradation, pet names/name calling, auralism, groping, half dressed kink ig?, cumming untouched, oral (receiving), fingering, squirting, brief deep throating, unprotected sex on a yoga mat, creampie
a/n: i done lost it guys TT just imagining having messy sex with mean dilf yeo somehow adds and takes off ten years of my life at the same time like some pemdas shit aughhh
 i hope you enjoy this filthy mess <33
Now Playing:
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᎘ʀᎇᎠ | ꜰꜰꜰ ᎍᎀꜱ᎛ᎇʀʟÉȘꜱ᎛ | ɮᮇxᮛ
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“What do you mean you’re breaking up with me?” you gasped into your phone, holding a hand against your chest, personally offended that your boyfriend of six months would suggest such a thing. “And what about my personal trainer? He’s like fifteen years older than me. Baby. You really think I would do that to you?” 
“Y/N, I’ve seen him with my own eyes. I know you’re fucking him, and I’m over it. It’s over,” your boyfriend repeated into your ear, just ripping the bandaid off then and there. 
“You can’t do that. We’re not breaking up,” you scoffed, wrapping a lock of your hair around your finger, your lips forming a pout. “Babyyy, come on, you’re being so dumb right now.” 
“Goodbye, Y/N,” he quickly said, before hanging up. 
“Ugh.” Pissed off, you tossed your phone onto your canopy style bed, knocking one of your limited edition plushies off and onto the carpeted floor in the process. You turned to your full length mirror, glaring back at your scrunched-up face, your hands formed into fists near your tiny tennis skirt. “If he thinks I’m fucking my personal trainer, then I’ll fuck my personal trainer, alright.”
And so, your petty, self-righteous plan of spiteful revenge was set. You were a smart girl. You knew exactly what to do to get your ridiculously sexy personal trainer to break his professional and moral codes. All you had to do was wear something impossibly tight without anything underneath and moan a little louder when he was stretching you out. It was as simple as that. Right? 
àżàżàż
Yeosang was everything a woman desired, all the way down to his persistent ability to respect them. He respected you, almost too much in your opinion. Here you were bent over in a ‘stretching position’ right in front of him, wearing a too-tight pair of gray leggings and the tiniest sports bra known to man, knowing damn well he could see the way you had your tits all pushed together for his viewing pleasure in the mirror, yet his eyes remained on yours. 
“How does it feel, Y/N? Are you tight anywhere like last time?” Yeosang asked, his voice, like dripping honey, filled your body with a comforting warmth. He studied your stretching form, one hand resting comfortably underneath his scruffy chin, the other on his hip. 
Your knees trembled slightly underneath you, urging you to return to a resting position, eventually sitting on your knees. You looked up to him, your eyelids lowering slightly, a pout on your glossy lips. “Really tight, yeah. I think I need help, Yeo
” 
“Then, I need you to lay down on your back for me,” he replied in a soft, though stern tone that made your cunt pulse, getting down onto his knees beside you with a small grunt. “Show me where, Y/N. You can do that, yeah?” 
Just as you laid down on the yoga mat, a fresh wave of slick slipped out of you. Damn him. He should be getting worked up over you, not the other way around. How would it be an act of petty revenge if you were soaking wet just from hearing your personal trainer’s absurdly sexy voice? 
“Nnngh, it’s right here
” you exhaled, feeling out your stiff hips, looking up at him past your lashes. “I need some stretching out, I think.” 
“Mm, I see. Well, let’s get you taken care of,” Yeosang nodded as his lips curled up into a somewhat mischievous smile, positioning himself so that he was in between your spread legs, wrapping his hands around one of your thighs and gently pushing it down towards your body, causing you to gasp. “Just relax for me, sweetheart
that’s it
” 
You were about to lose your mind, trying harder and harder not to let out a pornograhic moan the more Yeosang pushed his body weight onto you, your lower halves practically flush together. You wondered if he could feel how wet you were through your leggings, knowing there were no panties to catch your slick. “Yeosang
fuck
” 
Yeosang pushed down a little further, nodding his head apologetically. “I know, sweetheart, I know it hurts, but it’ll be worth it,” He gave you a charming smile, his fingers squeezing into the flesh of your thigh, pushing you down further, until the ache of your muscles matched the ache inside your cunt. “Still hurts?” 
“No, it feels good now, keep going, Yeo,” you sighed out, your eyes glazing over with lust, gently running your hand over his, sensing a hint of desire when it began to peer through Yeosang’s own lingering gaze, his hands moving towards your other thigh, beginning to give it the same treatment. 
“That’s a good girl,” Yeosang praised innocently enough, pressing your other thigh down against your body, leaning his body weight on you just enough to drive you mad, you cunt clenching around nothing. His other hand slipped around your opposite hip, expertly massaging it around with his calloused fingers. “Mm, you’re almost there. Just a little more
” 
“Yes, sir,” you sighed out, swearing you heard Yeosang’s breath get caught inside his throat just as soon as you felt something hard and heavy forming against your lower abdomen, hoping you weren’t just imagining it with your overheated brain. “I’m still so tight, Yeo
be gentle
” 
Yeosang bit into his bottom lip, coming to terms with your current shared predicament, wondering if you were both on the same page, but not fully knowing if he should cross several professional boundaries or not. Regardless, here he was, already pressing his stiff erection into his very young, very horny client’s cunt through her soaked leggings. What did he have to lose? His license maybe, and the respect of his peers perhaps, but it was worth the risk, especially now that most of the blood in his body had left his brain and filled up his heavy cock.
“Gentle, huh?” he chuckled deeply, pulling back slightly to admire the sight of your soaked cunt through your slick-stained leggings. “Sure you don’t want it rough, considering the way you’ve been dripping for me this entire time?” He ran two fingers down the legging seam that separated your puffy folds, rubbing them into your clit, making you let out another gasp. “Thought you could hide this from me, did you? I could feel how wet you were getting
”
“Fuck– Nooo, Yeo, I just wanted you to see it for yourself,” you answered whinily, spreading your legs open just a little wider, grabbing at the waistline of your leggings to make the shape of your cunt more pronounced, your pout returning. “Do you like it, sir?”  
“Jesus, of course I do. My slutty little client shows off her wet cunt and thinks I wouldn’t like it? Huh? Did you think I would be able to hold myself back?” Yeosang shook his head out of disbelief of his insane luck, taking his time running his calloused fingers up and down your clothed slit, admiring the way the material formed to the shape of it. 
Fuck it. You were too desperate now to reclaim any semblance of control over the situation, your act of personal revenge long forgotten, your mind only having enough space in it to think about Yeosang and getting used by him.
“I did it because I want to be your slut, Yeo. Please? Can I? I’ll be so good for you.” You began to move your hips along with his movements, in desperate need of more friction, more pleasure at your disposal, begging him with your glistening doe eyes. 
“Of course you can be my little slut, princess. You already are. I mean, just look at you, whoring yourself out for your personal trainer like this,” Yeosang groaned out, just as he lifted your ass up into the air by your hips, licking his lips. “I’ll make you mine, sweetheart.” And with that, he tore your leggings open just enough to expose your leaking cunt, leaning down slightly to take a deep inhale of your warm, flowery scent. “God, you’re completely soaked for me, Y/N. You’ve been wanting this so bad, haven’t you? Just dreaming about my tongue inside this tight hole of yours, huh?” 
“Yess, oh my god, please eat me out, Yeo, I’m begging,” you squeaked out from below him, already teary-eyed, ready to beg on your knees for the older man’s attention if you had to. 
Yeosang took an experimental lick up your cunt, already collecting enough slick inside his mouth for him to swallow down happily, idly working your clit with two agile fingers. “Do you play with your little clit like this and think of me before you go to sleep at night, Y/N?” he asked huskily against your cunt, beginning to lap at your leaking hole, teasing it with his tongue. “Huh? Do you think about me stretching you out with my tongue? With my cock?” 
“Yes, yes, yes,” you moaned, just as Yeosang’s tongue fully slid inside you to rub at your inner walls, tongue-fucking you in a ravenous manner, his fingers still flicking at and squeezing your clit, your juices dripping down the lower-half of his face. “Fuck
! Yeosang
!” 
“Uh-huhhh
” he moaned into you, sending pleasurable vibrations through your cunt, eventually replacing his tongue with two more fingers, fucking you so quickly, you couldn’t even get a chance to breathe. “That’s it, baby, you’re so close, aren’t you? Going to squirt for me, yeah? Is my slut going to cum all over my face?” 
“Yes–fuck, Yeo–” you could barely call out, your muscles tightening suddenly, your lower half pulsing more and more until you let out an involuntary cry, clear liquid squirting out of you and pouring onto Yeosang’s face, spilling onto the yoga mat, and soaking into the material of your torn leggings, some dripping along your abdomen.  
“Oh my god, that’s a gooood girl, look at you
” Yeosang praised shakily, gently slurping up your squirt from your twitching cunt, moaning into it, his softening cock resting against his cum-covered inner thigh. “What a good little slut you are, Y/N.” 
“Good enough for cock?” you simply asked from below, reaching up to spread your cunt apart further for him, all while gazing up at him with barely open eyes, still swimming in your post orgasm bliss. “Wanna be stuffed, Yeo. Please?”  
Your adorably filthy behavior alone made Yeosang harder than he’s been in a long time, making him want to join in on the fun. He wasted no time positioning himself so that his knees were on either side of your head, slowly lowering his joggers until his long, veiny cock sprung out in front of your face. “I think you should drool on my cock for me first, princess. Maybe take it down that pretty throat of yours. Sound good?”
“Yes, sir,” you obeyed, opening your mouth wide enough to take what you could of Yeosang’s impressive length inside, gagging immediately when he began to fuck into your throat, dribbles of spit leaking down your chin. “Mmmfff
” 
Gutteral groans routinely escaped Yeosang’s throat, continuing to pump himself into your mouth, unable to release himself from the tight, warm confines of your now bulging throat. “God, you’re taking me so fucking well, princess. Wish I could watch you swallow my load down
” He suddenly pulled out, resting the tip of his heavy cock on your saliva-streaked lips, letting you lazily lap up the beads of pre-cum that spilled from it. “Gotta fuck you, though. I know that slutty cunt needs to be filled with cock.” 
“Fuck, yes, sir, give it to me,” you purred against his cockhead, sucking and slurping on it like it was candy, only stopping when he pulled away to lower himself down your body, until his cock was slowly pressing into your willing hole instead. 
“Doesn’t matter whose cock, huh?” he asked in his low, honey-like voice, wrapping his fingers around your hips, massaging into them like before, only this time he was sliding you onto his pulsing length little by little until he had completely bottomed out inside. 
“Mm-hm. I love cock, especially yours, Yeo,” you admitted breathily, the shame you felt only increasing your arousal, barely able to hook your thighs around his waist when he began to quickly pump himself into you, your hole swallowing his thick cock up each time.
“You’ll let a–fuck–older guy
someone who’s your personal trainer
nnngh
use you like their own personal cum dump and–” He pulled out suddenly, only to plunge himself deep into your cunt, making you cry out. “–pump you full of his cum as long as you’re getting stuffed and bred. Isn’t that right, baby?”
“Uh-huh
!” you cried, unable to keep yourself from moaning and whining each time Yeosang slammed himself into you. “Fuck me like the slut I am
Please, sir
” 
“Oh godd, I’m gonna fuck you so hard, Y/N, gonna fuck your goddamn brains out,” Yeosang gruffed out in between brutal thrusts, resorting to grabbing and holding your wrists down so that you couldn’t get away from him, drilling his aching cock into your squelching hole like he was getting paid to do it, which he technically was. Life was good for Yeosang.
Yeosang did indeed fuck your brains out. He fucked you until you didn’t know which way was up or down. The only thing that brought you back to reality was something warm and thick gushing inside you, Yeosang’s calloused hand holding your own down against your abdomen, his nasty words barely reaching your hazy mind. 
“You feel that, princess? All the cum I’m filling this whore-hole up with?” he asked you softly in between harsh pants, a few beads of sweat sliding down his sharp chin and landing onto your flushed face. 
You could hardly move, let alone form a coherent sentence. “Yes, yes, yes
” 
“I want to see it
Want you to see what I’ve done to you.” Yeosang slowly pulled out of you, milking the tip of his cock, groaning softly, leaving a few more spurts of his load on your puffy cunt, a few drops of it getting onto the torn hole inside your leggings. 
He gently turned you around, so that you were facing the mirror on the wall, reaching past your spread thighs to spread open your cunt with his thumbs, laying his lips against your ear, “Look. You got cum leaking out of you, your leggings are all torn up, and you got squirt all over the mat too...Do you see what a mess you’ve become for me, Y/N?” 
“Yeah, I see, Yeo. I love it
” You gazed at his hazy reflection in the mirror with hearts in your eyes, wishing you had seduced your personal trainer at an earlier date. 
Inhaling your flowery scent once more, Yeosang pressed a kiss onto your cheek, nuzzling it. “That’s my girl.” He tilted his head to the side, his hands rubbing into your sore hips. “Same time next week?” 
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bandgie · 2 months ago
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Between us | Armageddon Event
Request: Sloth | Park Seonghwa (ATZ) by anon song!
warnings! mdni18+, fem!reader, handjob, cum eating (m!), cum swapping, making out, attempts at fluff lol, sleepy!reader/hwa, ass grabbing
notes! the gender envy Seonghwa gives me must be studied. also I love this song sm
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You love the feel of Seonghwa when he’s fresh out of the shower. His skin is not hot, but not quite cold. It soothes your own flesh between the sheets.
Slender fingers snake their way up your shirt and around your waist to bring you close. Your chest is flushed to his, legs entangled in a way you know will make you sweaty within an hour, but you don't mind.
And when you breathe, you can smell the soap. Seonghwa’s body and scent encompass you wholly and you can only sigh in content into his neck.
“You feel nice.” It’s just above a whisper as you groan in satisfaction. Your nose touches his throat when you breathe in. “I like it when you’re clean.”
Seonghwa laughs, but he sounds almost offended. “Am I dirty most of the time or something?”
You giggle with him and you can feel how his arms tighten around you. “After practice, yeah, but I don’t really mind. I like you stinky too.”
He makes a sound of disgust that’s drowned out by your pleased laughter. Your arms wrap around his small waist, and when you pull him impossibly closer, you can feel the poking of his hard-on.
“Ugh.” You look up at him and narrow your eyes. “Do you have to get hard all the time?”
Seonghwa can’t meet your eyes. His blushing face is turned upwards, pretending that you aren’t even there. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” But as he finds the courage to look at you, something in his sleepy eyes darkens. 
“Don’t play dumb with me right now. I can feel it stabbing my stomach.” Although you have an irritated expression on your pretty face, you don’t deny the excitement that bubbles in you. “Aren’t you tired from practice?”
He is. You could tell the moment he trudged through the front door and collapsed on the couch. Getting him to take a shower was a challenge in itself; you felt like a mother scolding their child for getting sweat and dirt on the furniture.
Even now, you can see the tiredness in his slanted eyes. Seonghwa’s lips are pouty from sleep, but that doesn’t stop his damned tongue from swiping over them.
“A little. I can stay up though.”
You know what he means. There’s been more than plenty of nights of a tired Seonghwa pounding you into the mattress. He cums quickly like that, flopping on the bed when he’s finished and opting to lick you clean rather than a shirt from the closet.
And although you feel warmth between your legs from the thought, you can’t imagine all the work you and him would have to put into for sex.
“But it’s late.”
He nods, “I know. And we’re both pretty tired from work.”
There’s a moment of silence between you two. On one hand, yes you’re exhausted. You really didn’t plan on fucking tonight, content with Seonghwa in your embrace. But on the other hand
 there’s more than one way to have fun.
You use the hand that’s wrapped around his torso to snake between your bodies. You go over his hip, starting at his stomach before going to his navel and the front of his boxers.
Seonghwa’s warm in your palm even through the clothes. His breath catches in his throat when you gently rub him, thumb ghosting over the head of his cock.
The hand under your shirt rubs up and down encouragingly. You can feel his body heat up, the cold droplets of his shower nowhere to be seen. Seonghwa’s fingers slip from your shirt to find the fat of your ass instead. 
He squeezes when you cup his heaviness. You grope his sack before your palm goes up, trying your best to wrap around his cock and stroke.
“Shit.” Seonghwa’s lids close over his eyes briefly. “Just like that.”
You hum, straining your neck so you can kiss the underside of his jaw. 
He lets you, invites you even. The sounds of your pecks quietly echo in the room. His skin tastes as he smells. There's a faint soapiness to it, but not overwhelming in the slightest. You lick a stripe from the base of his throat to his earlobe and Seonghwa rewards you with a whimper.
His hips begin to match your pace. Seonghwa ruts into your hand with tired desperation that can only occur in the late hours of the night. All you need to do is keep a tight ring with your fingers so he can thrust into them, but you have a different plan in mind.
It’s a whine that leaves him when your hands move. Seonghwa pulls from your kisses to look down at you confused and pleadingly.
Before he can think of begging, your fingers diligently pull his erection free.
You don’t even get to see how his cock stands in all its glory. All of your attention is on Seonghwa’s parted lips and arched eyebrows, the symbol of his pleasure when you wrap your hand around him.
It’s alright if you can’t see how hard he is, you can feel it. It throbs in your hold. Little drops of precum ooze from his tip and you use it to slide against his length.
Seonghwa looks at you with an unreadable expression. It ranges from everything between exhaustion and need, but when he looks at your lips, you know what to give him.
The kiss is open-mouthed. There’s hardly any energy to lock your lips properly, but you have no complaints when he moans into your mouth. You eat the sound, tasting his pleasure on your tongue when you circle his tip.
His hips buck. Another delicious mewl lands on your lips and you eagerly suck on his bottom lip.
“Like that.” Seonghwa still manages to speak, his bottom teeth gleaming in the shadows. “Imma cum.”
You can tell. You’ve touched him enough to know when he gets close. His thrusts grow sloppy and he’s trying to press your body closer to his by your ass, but he can’t with your hand jerking him off.
So Seonghwa satisfies himself by kissing you properly. His lips mingle with yours almost endearingly and he gently takes your tongue into his mouth.
He tastes of toothpaste and mint, another clear sign that sleeping was also his intention this night. But when he twitches in your hand and sucks harshly on your pink muscle, it’s finishing that he has his sights set on.
You can feel the ropes of cum shoot out. It lands on the exposed part of your stomach and shirt, spraying until the white arousal does nothing but dribble on your fingers.
Seonghwa moans in your mouth controllably. You take the opportunity to kiss him sloppily, uncaring for how your saliva drips onto his chin. Judging from the continuous pulsing and more oozing, you think he likes it too.
Now you’re able to look down at the mess he’s made. It’s more than you thought. You should have put a towel underneath before Seonghwa finished all over him and yourself.
But it’s nothing he can’t help clean.
You do your best to swipe all the cum in your hand. He gasps when you squeeze his tip, making sure to get every drop out.
As you bring your soiled fingers up, you can’t help but stare at the ropes of cum. It could almost be considered pretty being stretched on your digits like this, but you don’t have enough time to dwell on it when Seonghwa happily takes your fingers into his mouth.
He moans at his taste, tongue lapping before he moves to the next finger. His tongue is wet and warm, so similar yet different than the cum he’s eating. You shiver at the memory of the very same tongue digging into your cunt, collecting yours and his arousal for his own hunger.
Seonghwa pops your fingers out one by one, a drop of cum escaping from the corner of his mouth that he licks back in.
He doesn’t have to ask, you lean in again to kiss him. Seonghwa moves his hand from your ass to the back of your head to angle you perfectly against him. You can taste his release, his salty but raw taste. You gulp most of it down, saving some on your tongue so he can play with the strings between your lips.
And it’s strands of cum and salvia that connect you two when you pull away breathlessly. 
His eyes are droopy. The high of his orgasm settled with the kiss and it’s only fatigue that welcomes him now. But his soaked, swollen lips still can’t help but ask, “Your turn?”
As good as it sounds to have his fingers play with your slick folds, you know Seonghwa would fall asleep before you could finish. Even if it was his mouth latched onto your pussy, he would still knock out from the warmth between your legs.
You’ll have to ignore the uncomfortable wetness in your underwear for tonight. “Maybe next time.”
Seonghwa has already begun to close his eyes. “But
but
your turn
” His head rests on the pillow, blinking to stay awake. But the warmth of your body and his after-glow is getting to him.
“I can
” he yawns. “...eat you out
”
You smile, but seeing him yawn makes you mimic him. His tiredness is rubbing off on you quickly and suddenly his mouth on your cunt doesn’t sound as good as sleeping in his arms. 
A chaste kiss on his lips is all he needs to succumb to his slumber. “Goodnight, Seonghwa.”
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kissitbttr · 1 year ago
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it’s no shit that simon and miguel are big men. and hella strong too. so when you tell them ‘i’m too heavy, I don’t want to tire you out’ when they suggest they want to fuck you against the wall with their arms supporting you, of course they get offended. what? you don’t think they’re strong enough to carry you? you think they’re just going to take it when you put yourself down like that? calling yourself heavy? fuck, you’re in for a surprise.
they’re fuming, pissed off. because who the fuck told you that you’re too heavy? but instead of giving you a verbal response, they just pick you up easily with one hand and throw you over their shoulders making you squeal, carrying you towards the bedroom and finding the nearest wall to prove you wrong
one of their big hands around your soft thick thigh to support your weight as the other pulling your panties down. showing you that they can multitask, eyes gazing into yours in a cocky manner. they aren’t even going to prep you first, that’s how much you pissed them off. even when you tell them to slow down and take it easy, they’ll just ignore you.
the moment they slide their cock into you, a loud moan escape your mouth. they’re giving you no time to adjust and just begin pumping in an out of your tight cunt. they groan by how you clench around your shaft. thinking to themselves how just perfect your tight pussy is made only for them. and how perfect you are just for them.
‘see, sweetheart? who says you’re too heavy huh? i’m holding you with one arm while I’m fucking you.’ such a cocky tone as they breathlessly ask between grunts and groans. continuing to pound you even harder when your moans gets louder. making sure your legs are hovering the floor, or else they’re going to lose it. ‘perfect little body just for me to fuck
 to own
 perfect tits and ass, all just for me
and you out here calling yourself heavy. fucking. bullshit.’
your mind is fucked. cause they’re angry-fucking you dumb to the point you can’t think straight. eyes lulling to the back of your head as angelic moans continues to spill from your pretty lips that they are obsessed with. they watch how you fall apart. delicate nails softly scratching their backs with no doubt that they would leave marks.
‘uh-huh
 that’s right
never say that shit again to my face, darling’ one hand move to grope your bouncing tit, as the other gripping tightly around your thigh. fingertips digging onto the soft flesh. to prove that they can multitask just fine. ‘or else, i might just fuck a baby into you next time that happens’
-
god, imagine getting tag teamed by these two. might be leaving with a broken pussy
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jadeylovesmarvelxo · 6 months ago
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You meet Eddie Munson, the guy who your brother Dustin idolises. It does not go well...
đŸ–€
Why did you have the insanely stupid idea to drive your brother to Hellfire Club tonight? You could have been with Tiffany and Chloe watching Breakfast Club for the millionth time or Nightmare on elm street. Gossiping about cute boys or anything else than this.
Except you had agreed to drive Dustin to his dumb club and he hadn't stopped talking your ear off about d&d and Eddie Munson and whatever else came into his head.
You adored your little brother but the two of you were so different in the things you liked and most people were stunned when they learned that the two of you were even related.
Dustin ploughed on about Eddie and you struggled to keep up. You hadn't met the guy your brother idolised, of course you had heard of him. Everyone in Hawkins had heard of Eddie 'the freak' Munson but the two of you ran in vastly different circles.
Naturally you were a little curious about him, he was the leader and dungeon master of the Hellfire member club, you vaguely knew of what the dungeon master did in d&d, Dustin had tried to teach you about the game a few times and certain things had stuck in your head.
"Please be nice to Eddie. He's so cool and I don't want you embarrassing me in front of him" Dustin begs and you're slightly offended by this, you were always polite to Dustin's friends, even when the little nerds got on your nerves.
"I'm always nice" Dustin snorts at this and you glare at him. Butthead.
"I think you'll like Eddie, the rest of his friends are cool too. Besides it will get you out of the house and stop you moping about Jacob" you wrinkle your nose at the mention of your ex.
Jacob was ancient history as far as you were concerned... He really was a self centered asshole and you're glad you didn't take months to figure that out. You were still upset that he turned out to be such a douchebag.
You pull up at Hawkins High and Dustin rushes to get to the drama club. Okay, so the two of you were a little late... Like over ten minutes because Chloe called you and was having a crisis about what to wear for her date with Taylor but that couldn't be helped?
"Eddie likes people to be on time, I can't believe you made me late" Dustin huffs and you follow him inside, trying to tune out his attitude.
"Henderson, care to explain why you're late?" A voice snaps from where the rest of the team are seated. This must be Eddie, he's on a chair that resembles a throne and is clearly the person in charge.
Your eyes flicker over his ring clad hands, the leather jacket and curly brown hair. Big brown eyes narrow at your brother who's pink cheeked and stammering.
"Uh, shit...uh sorry Eddie" Dustin throws you a contemptuous look but you're too busy looking at Eddie.
He really was very attractive. Unfortunately he opens his mouth again and that thought vanishes like a puff of smoke.
"Spit it out Dustin. We don't have all night and I'm already behind which I'm pissed about, you little butthead"
Butthead? Hey, who was he to insult your brother. Only you got that honour.
"Excuse me, exactly who do you think you're talking to?" Eddie's gaze meets yours and they widen for a second. Then he smirks. He even has dimples which makes him even hotter.
Asshole.
"This is between me and Dustin. What's it to you?". He asks and it's so cocky that you march right up to him and Dustin groans.
"I told you not to embarrass me" he whines and you ignore him and focus on Eddie who's watching you with an amused look on his face.
"That butthead is my brother and I'm the only one who can speak to him like that" you snap and Eddie's grin widens.
"I didn't realise Henderson had a sister and that still doesn't explain why he's late" you ignore the way your stomach clenches when Eddie appraises you.
"That's my fault so yell at me. My friend had a few problems" Dustin rolls his eyes.
"Yeah, like finding an outfit for her date was a crisis" you shoot him with an icy glare and he quietens. Eddie's eyes crinkle when he smiles and he puts his hand on his heart in mock horror.
"Oh no, not the dreaded date outfit conundrum" you grow a little flustered and you scowl. Seriously this was the guy that Dustin adored? Steve, now you could get why Dustin worshipped Steve but seriously, this guy?
"He's great isn't he?" Dustin grins at you and you gape, were you the only one here who thought Eddie was a cocky asshole? A very hot one but still an asshole.
"Oh he's perfect...a perfect pain in the ass" you reply sarcastically but mutter the last part under your breath. Eddie still hears it and laughs as he settles back on his throne.
"You sure she's your sister Dustin? Seems she needs to remove the stick from her..." The guys laugh hesitantly and you level one last vicious glare at Eddie before you storm out.
"I'll pick you up at nine thirty Dustin" you call back to him and Eddie's voice follows you out.
"I miss you already princess"
Ugh. Asshole.
I might make this a series, we shall see 💞
468 notes · View notes
corpseidol · 7 months ago
Note
Hear me out, a vampire like reader x sbg cast. Like they don’t drink human blood but they do drink phantom blood (do they even have blood?) Maybe reader had actually been in the cycle longer, giving them more experience with the phantoms? Like in the day time just your average goth but when it strikes twelve? Those phantoms better pray. I think it would be funny if they were the youngest, like Aiden but with more maturity? đŸ©ž-anon
NIGHTFALL
author’s note : I LOVE THIS (you can be đŸ©ž anon!!)
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concept : vampire!reader with sbg group
genre : hcs + one drabble, vampire au (only reader)
content : gn!reader
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first meeting the group
⠀ â€ș ⠀being honest, the group thought you were some newly found demon that lurked the phantom realm.
⠀ â€ș ⠀they were freaked out when they saw you just recklessly eating off the flesh of each phantom and slicing all of them into pieces.
⠀ â€ș ⠀at first you seemed like a maniac but the more they saw the more that ashlyn felt like you were doing it like you knew what you were getting into.
⠀ â€ș ⠀as they were watching you assassinate each phantom and clear the area for them, aiden felt most fascinated and was about to jump in as soon as you killed them all until you started sucking on the phantoms flesh
⠀ â€ș ⠀the group was looking at you with pure disgust (while aiden still had that smile on his face)
⠀ â€ș ⠀logan stared at you, aiming his shotgun at you and as soon as the bullet almost hit, you flinched. then you were gone. gone?
“i’m offended.” you hissed, crossing your arms. your clothes were drenched in blood. as logan was about to shoot you again, you kicked his gun to the side and wiped the blood dripping on your chin with the back of your hand before licking it.
the others didn’t know if they should run but tyler confidently held his weapon at you “are you gonna be a problem?” he grit his teeth as he watched your smile fade “are you?” you asked, your hand curling into a fist.
first impressions
⠀ â€ș ⠀the group concluded that they wouldn’t hurt you (unless you do something wrong)
⠀ â€ș ⠀aiden was mostly fascinated by your skill and asked a lot of questions
⠀ â€ș ⠀tyler was wary of you and would get protective when you go anywhere near taylor. he thinks you’re a psycho.
⠀ â€ș ⠀taylor was a little wary but she did wanna warm up to you, she had questions to ask too
⠀ â€ș ⠀logan seemed to be timid around you, his guard was always up. he had mixed feelings about you.
⠀ â€ș ⠀ashlyn felt slightly troubled abt an addition to the group, but she really pondered when you said you’re way more experienced than them. she had many questions to ask. and those questions weren’t all about your abilities. (some, not all!)
⠀ â€ș ⠀ben was quiet around you, he didn’t stand out very much.
drinking phantom blood
⠀ â€ș ⠀it would freak them out when they all meet up in one area and you seem to be missing
⠀ â€ș ⠀and then after a few seconds, you come back with blood all over your shirt with a dumb smile. they look at you with a weird face and you just stare at them like “wazzup ma dudes?”
⠀ â€ș ⠀sometimes it’s like they have to keep you on a leash because of how reckless you can be
⠀ â€ș ⠀they would get scared and start running from you when fresh phantom blood gets all over them and your pupils just grow bigger as the scent flows to your nose
general hcs
⠀ â€ș ⠀i like to think that you get way more energy when you drink the blood of phantoms so when you do, you’re like an unleashed beast.
⠀ â€ș ⠀compared to the others, you’re not scared to go in a phantom-filled area. you just make sure you’re prepared.
⠀ â€ș ⠀in the real world, you deal with terrible body pains because of the adrenaline
⠀ â€ș ⠀aiden is very playful and challenging towards you
⠀ â€ș ⠀you and aiden are literally a power-duo
⠀ â€ș ⠀when you and tyler still haven’t warmed up to each other, he would hate it when a phantom would be behind him and when he hears a loud squash; he would turn around and see a phantom’s body on the floor with their head being held by your sharp teeth with a shit-eating grin
⠀ â€ș ⠀ben heals your bruises because you get hurt as much as aiden does
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bitchlessdino · 2 years ago
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i just read fuck marry kill and it was sooooooo good gah i love it , idk if its rude to ask thos but can u make a mingyu wonu and seungcheol version of it too? they are my baises and i would love something like that !! u can alternate the setting if u please :>
tysm 💘
-đŸ’«
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Pairing: fem!reader x ex!mingyu x seungcheol x wonwoo
Genre: smut
Word count: 5.6k
tags: poly, exhibitionism, voyeurism, degradation, pet names (princess), unprotected sex (except cheol), praise kink, spanking, clit slapping, fingering, oral (rec. and giving), u, pussy slapping, ass play, triple penetration
Summary: one dumb party game makes a comeback.
author note: tbh i initally wondered how someone could ask to replace some of the members in the original, but then I realized how grateful that it got the attention it did that another version was requested. these were honestly really fun to write and I'm glad to have found a way to tie in the last version and this one to make a spinoff!
“Fuck Cheol, obvious because he has the experience. Marry Wonwoo because he just seems like he knows how to treat someone well. And duh, kill Mingyu because he’s Mingyu.”
“You’re such a bitch.”
You glance back at the man you hypothetically killed, now giving you a cold dead stare, making you grin smugly before taking a swig from your beer. “Takes one to know one.”
He raises a brow, now leering at you, “I hope you’re alone forever.” 
You slightly slam your empty bottle on the coffee table, “And I can already tell you’re halfway there.”
He scoffs, crossing his arms, “Oh yeah, remind me again who approached who?”
“Remind me again who also dumped who?”
Mingyu was baffled. It had been months since you both had broken up and you still used that to pull over his head. You had your reasons for ending things, he knew that but had hoped to salvage some of the good left in your relationship with him. Once it was over, you mutually agreed on being friends, willing to forget about all that’s happened because you were friends first, but he knew that better than anyone, that shit was never easy.
“Uh, guys?”
Wonwoo’s voice, despite being as timid as it was, asserted attention with two words alone. Mingyu and you look at Wonwoo, still angry at one another, but melt at their friend’s concern, putting aside their petty disagreement. You exhale in an attempt of calming your heart rate and pat Wonwoo’s hand reassuringly, “We’re good. Just how we are. Mingyu gets it.”
Wonwoo was never one for conflict. He was the glue to hold this entire group together. If it wasn’t for him, the terror couple would've never made up the way they did.
“Yeah, we’re just horsing around, but that does remind me,” Mingyu is quick to turn the attention to Seungcheol, a cheeky smile bright on the younger man’s face, “You promised to discuss the details of what happened after the birthday party.”
The eldest arches a brow, amused by Mingyu’s statement, and decides to entertain the idea, “When the hell did I promise that?”
“You didn’t, but you might as well after I caught that group chat,” Mingyu scoots closer to him,  “Go on, tell us all about you having to share with three other dicks.”
Seungcheol clicks his tongue, already scolding him. “There were two other dicks, first of all. Secondly, it just happened. You can’t really plan a foursome.”
You peer over at him intrigued. “You technically can, but considering you just did it out of nowhere, I don’t know whether to be disgusted or impressed. I thought you’d be way more responsible and boring than that.”
His eyes shoot back at your assumption. “I am not fucking boring and you can be responsible in an orgy! We all knew what were doing, we all consented, and we were all clean–”
“Boring
get on to the part where three of your dicks were in her at once.” A flying head smack makes its destination to the back of Mingyu’s head and instantly he’s offended, glaring back at his assailant. “Hey!”
“Don’t talk about anything you’re uncomfortable with Cheol. It’s your dick, it’s your sex life,” You reassure.
“Well, it’s not just my story to tell so I’ll leave it at this.” All ears perk in his direction, even Wonwoo, who was quietly observing, couldn’t help but ponder on the rare experience Seungcheol had at that birthday party. “There is nothing more satisfying than seeing a pussy so full. I kid you not, I would do it over and over again just to see the look on her face.”
Not a dry eye in his audience. You hold your hand over your mouth in shock, Mingyu’s howling like the moon had just come out, and even Wonwoo was stunned at such an obscene statement, blinking into the distance like he’s in The Office. Seungcheol, filled with pride, picks himself off from the ground and dusts any dirt off. “I’ll be back. Too much beer. No one kill anybody.”
He ambles off to the restroom, closing the door behind him.
“Ah,” Wonwoo claps his sweater paws together, “there’s a game I was waiting to buy. I still have some time before then. Need to be first in line.”
He hurriedly gets up from the floor and rushes to his room, “I’ll be back! 20–30 minutes tops!”
You two are left alone and awkward silence fills the air. Things were never really the same since your relationship ended, but things weren’t ever really it when you were together either.
“Foursome huh?” You ponder. “Didn’t seem like his kind of activity but if he enjoys it.”
Mingyu scoffs, ready to start smth again. “What? Jealous he’s getting more action than you?”
“Not jealous, just worried. How can a human body take that much cock and still walk around all normally? Happy birthday to them,” you snicker.
“Don’t worry, you won’t have to worry about that many dicks wanting to be inside you.”
You glare at him, your teeth grinding behind your fake smile. “You sure talk a lot for someone as bitchless as you are.”
“Excuse you, I am fucking stacked with pussy right now, speak when you have your facts right, ‘mmkay?”
You let out a curt guffaw, “Please, you are so fucking lucky you had me when you did. No damn way in hell you could’ve gotten laid without me.”
Mingyu slouches, drawing his jaw open. “Wow. I get it now”
“Get what? How big of a loser you are?”
He shakes his head. “No...You miss my dick so bad.”
You make a show of yourself laughing, even physically doubling over. “In your fucking dreams, you human pandemic.”
“Admit it. You miss our sex. It’s why you’re such a fucking a bitch to me. To throw my game off.”
“Oh honey, you don’t need my help doing that.”
“Please! You got this territorial thing because we were each other’s first. You’re obsessed with me. I see that now.”
“Right, you’re drunk,” you pick yourself up from the ground this time and saunter off to the kitchen, “I couldn’t care less about who you sleep with. As long as it doesn’t involve me.”
“You’re such a liar,” he insults as he gets up to follow.
He positions himself by your side as you distract yourself in the kitchen, mindlessly looking for, well, anything. Why was every cupboard empty? You really have to remember to go grocery shopping with Wonwoo later.
“Am not,” You insist, no finding haven in the fridge, which also happened to be barren of things except half a dozen eggs, a carton of milk, and for some reason a box of m&ms.
“You can’t even look me in the eyes right now. Say it while looking at me.”
You scoff without looking, “I don’t have to prove myself.”
“Why? Because you can’t? Admit it.” His hand trails over your backside as you stall at the fridge, trailing underneath your shirt and sending chills.
You can practically count his breaths as his lips ghost over your ears, smiling against your skin. You almost let out a gasp at the close proximity of his hips pressed into your back, your heartbeat heightening, but immediately close your mouth shut, not giving him the satisfaction. That didn’t bother him though, your body language was enough. You were frozen under pressure, unable to fight back, let alone talk back, similar to how you used to get in the past only minutes before he gets you cum like the mess you were. 
His hand slides over your bare stomach, feeling you tense it up as a result. “You loved when I ate out your dirty little pussy. You begged for it. Remember?”
You shudder at his touch, gripping the handle of the fridge for safety, “Mingyu—“
“Don’t think I forgot how you moaned my name either,” he finds the top button of your pants with ease, unbuttoning it and pulling the metal zipper down, “Tell me to stop. Otherwise, I’ll just keep going.”
When you grow silent, he takes it as a sign to keep going. He presses his lips to the back of your ear, hand falling to your thigh and cupping over your clothed cunt. You dip into the fridge’s cold, taming the heat in your body, while Mingyu makes that difficult to resist. Your back arch, fitting seamlessly to Mingyu’s figure, soft, yet desperate, sighs escaping from your lips.
“Mingyu please
”
“Mmh, just like that
” he nibbles against your ear, slowly and cautiously he sinks his hand down your pants and finds your arousal, a thin film of it already coating his fingers, “your voice was pretty just like that. Whining about how you need my dick inside of you or begging to let you cum on my fingers. You were such a sweet little slut for me. Tell me you don’t miss that.”
You’re shaking so much, you could feel your legs seconds away from giving out. You shut the refrigerator close and turn to face him, leveraging yourself against the appliance’s cool exterior. He pins himself against you, sliding his digits between your slit, making contact with the clit, and pinching it between his thumb and index. You can’t help but crack a small moan, only loud enough for him to hear, and he just chuckles. “There you are. Old habits die hard don’t they?”
He does his best in reminding you of the old times, even rubbing your pussy how he used to, getting your sweat pilling on your forehead, or your voice getting raspy as if you were left to die in a desert. Fuck him for still having that effect on you. 
“Please
you’ll get us caught.” You plead weakly.
“You say that like you actually want us to get caught.”
He pulls out his fingers from your pants, sticking them in his mouth before sucking your juices from them. You watch in a hypnotized state, mouth gaping in envy, desperate to have his lips wrapped around you, your lips, your cunt, anywhere as long as it's your body. “Sweet. Just like how I remember.”
You gulp hard, staring back into his carnal gaze, and observe as he slowly pulls out his fingers and rests them against your cheek, parting your lips back with his thumb. 
“Am I interrupting something?”
As an impulse, you push Mingyu several feet away from you, hiding your undone pants behind a kitchen counter. The taller man can’t help but suppress his boisterous laughter threatening to seep out and only glances back at his friend’s sudden appearance in amusement, feeling like the victor in the situation. Meanwhile, you made yourself physically small, tucking away in the corner of the kitchen where he can’t see you panic while fixing your pants but inevitably fail. “S-Seungcheol.”
Mingyu lets his smugness show. “I don’t know. Is he, Y/n? Is he interrupting something?”
“No, of course not. Just caught me a
rough spot.”
Seungcheol rolls his eyes. “Look, if you guys are going to have sex and get back together. No one is stopping you.”
“Excuse me,” you feel rather insulted at his assumption, it was condescending entirely.
“Come on, it was bound to happen eventually. Save us, the tittering and whatever.”
You push past Mingyu to walk straight to Seungcheol, shoving his heavy build. “What I do with my body and my life is not up to Mingyu or you, Choi Seungcheol. Fuck you.”
He leers down at you. “Don’t get mad at me because you know I’m right, you brat.”
“Oh, because you fuck with a few extra people, you think you know everything, don’t you?”
“More than your ‘only Mingyu having ass’,” he taunts.
If Mingyu was the ex, and Wonwoo’s the innocent bystander, Seungcheol, in your case, was a shit stirrer. He pushes your buttons about the same as Mingyu some of the time. He was supposed to be your closest friend, your longest friend. Somewhere that had changed. You used to tell each other everything and now he was getting into threesomes? 
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, fuck you.” You push him back onto the couch behind him, having him collapse seamlessly against it before you’re straddling him.
Your lips latch onto him assertively, tugging and, no doubt, stretching his plain tee. If Seungcheol minded, he didn't seem to show it, and instead kisses you back, matching your aggression. Although initially startled, it doesn’t take him long to adjust to your pace. He handles your body as if he belongs to him, gripping you by the back of your neck as his other hand tucks around the shape of your ass, firmly squeezing it.
“You’re so, mmh, f-frustrating sometimes.” You manage to comment between your moans.
He snickers under his breath, hand running through your hair and pulling at its strands, tugging your head back, “And you can be a real bitch.”
Your blossoming attraction for him only made it all the more frustrating. You always did notice that he behaves a more particular way around you over the past few years. Somewhere between distant and insensitive. Whatever it was, you were gonna take it out on him, and maybe that’s what he wanted.
Scoffing, you grind against his bulge, harshly brushing it against your cunt. “I’ll show you a bitch.”
He grunts beneath your efforts, quickly returning your offense. His hands travel underneath your shirt, pressing into your flesh. His teeth bite down, pulling on your bottom lip, and you can sweet his smile as he does it. He thrusts up into you, rocking back at your core, waiting to fill out what you’ve been dying to entrust him with. The thought itself made you wet (as if you weren’t already from that little incident with Mingyu).
The man that previously had been watched was now the one watching. It was all face paced but it was like he watching in slow motion. He observes the placement of Seungcheol’s hands, and how they grabbed you possessively, even hearing the growl under the elder’s breath. Your moans grow louder when the man’s lips are suctioned around your neck, your nails noticeably digging as his hands slide lower to feel the bare ass beneath your jeans.
Mingyu sucks in his breath, repositioning the spot in his jeans. He impulsively licks his licks, unable to look away. “Didn’t expect that.”
“Me neither.”
Startled, Mingyu cups his erection as his eyes shoot up alert, finally noticing his four-eyed friend has emerged from his bedroom without so much as making a single wood board squeak. “The fuck? Did you come back from the shadow realm?”
Wonwoo shrugs nonchalantly. “The deed is done, and this is a thing now, I guess.”
Wonwoo just how Mingyu felt about you over the years despite the flaming misalignments with your personalities. He couldn’t imagine the thoughts running in his best friend's head right now.
He turns Mingyu in concern, seeing the man’s eyes glisten in the scene's direction. “You okay?”
Was he? He’s looking at one of his best friends furiously getting it on with his ex, neither of them giving a damn who watches and he should be furious. He should be enraged. He should be at least bothered by what’s happening, but no. Only one thing was furious.
“No,” Mingyu answers, “I’m horny.”
He leaves Wonwoo’s company to join you and Seungcheol on the couch, immediately taking your head back in a hungry kiss as Seungcheol finds solace back on your neck, finding weak weak points in mere seconds, and you can’t help but moan in Mingyu’s liplock. Wonwoo is at first confused about what to do, only able to watch at first until his curiosity piques.
In the midst of his observation, you’ve gone pantless, quickly followed by Seungcheol and Mingyu, and has quickly adjusted to double the attention. Seungcheol manages to pull out a few spare condoms from his wallet all too conveniently, handing one off to Mingyu, who was ready to whip his angry erection out any second. He then lays his eyes on Wonwoo, staring off in his direction, still suckling on your neck. He gestures to him to take the extra condom, nonverbally inviting him into the spontaneous mix.
The bystander hesitates, staring back at the silver wrapper as if it was a foreign object, unsure if he was really offered to join or had this situation become a common courtesy for a latecomer such as him.
“Take the condom, Woo. You’re gonna need it with what we’re about to do,” Seughcheol ushers against your flaming skin.
Wonwoo inches closer in baby steps, hand stretching out and grasping the plastic, and at the same time, you pull away from either man from the couch, turning your whole attention to Wonwoo. You grab him by his collar and smash against his lips. It’s strange, almost wrong at most, you were already occupying someone else’s lap, but in a strange way, empowering. His hand crawls up the side of your face to deepen the kiss, feeling your tongue explore his mouth just as you did the other two, while they were only able to watch. 
Exhibitionism, let alone orgy, was never on his bingo card. Sex for him wasn’t even that regular an occurrence for him, but he could see now the taste of what Seungcheol was talking about. There was something satisfyingly carnal about sharing someone. You play into their hands as if your life depended on it, but felt all that same arousal anyone else in that group did.
With that thought in mind, it invoked something in Wonwoo. Shivers ran down his spine the moment your hand goes to cup the bulge of his track pants, feeling him grow bigger in size when you slip past the waistband and slid beneath his briefs. His eyes fluttered at the soft sensation of your fingertips, teasing the precum squeezing out of the head.
“You feel so big, Woo,” you gasp out as your grasp travels down his length, “let me suck on it, please.”
The man shifts in his seat, delirious to the point of being mute, only able to nod triumphantly as you begin tugging the pants and underwear off, collecting the fabric at his ankles.
“Princess,” Seungcheol beckons, “why don’t you lay your stomach on my lap to get closer to Wonwoo’s cock.”
You nod obediently, satisfied with your new pet name, getting off of Seungcheol’s lap to place yourself back on again, this time your ass in view for Seungcheol and Mingyu to appreciate. Mingyu’s teeth catch his bottom lip, groping himself through his briefs. “Fuck.”
He can’t help but land a full-handed spank against your cheek, causing you to flinch after your grip wrapped around the base of Wonwoo’s cock and he feels a tight squeeze around his girth and he throws back his head from the sensitivity, “Gyu, for god’s sake.”
“Sorry, dude, couldn’t help myself,” the younger man chuckles, “but she likes that. You like all our attention on you, don’t you?”
You let out a light chuckle, a smug grin stretching over your face. “Yes, yes I do.”
Seungcheol couldn’t help fixating on your ass pulling your waistband down to the curve and sliding a dry finger up your wet slit, groaning at simply how gloriously wet you were. “Shit. You’re fucking soaked. You can take my fingers right, princess?”
“Mmh, yes, Cheol. Give it to me
”
As you’re spitting into your hand, stroking handfuls of Wonwoo in your hand, you can feel Seungcheol fitting two digits in your moisture and hooking them in place. He goes easy on you, mildly prepping you, while you drop your head and wrap your lips around the tip of Wonwoo’s length, swirling circles on to lap up the bit of his precum, your soft giggles vibrating against the spectacled man.
His gaze softens at you, petting your hair and caressing your cheek. “So
pretty
”
“Thank you,” you reply, taking half his size in your mouth, and feel how he hugs your cheeks.
Wonwoo lets outs hushed whimpers, exhaling out of his nose, his fingers impulsively finger through your hair and take grip. Through his shut eyes, he can feel the nodding of your head, the vigor of your tongue, and finally the head of his cock hitting your uvula, bobbing back and forth. “S-shit, like that, yeah
”
He can feel himself physically shuddering, glancing back at the lure of your eyes as your mouth collects every inch, every vein, and moan that escapes his lips. His hand guides you, pushing you deeper around his cock and the sounds of your efforts were euphoric, especially how they were followed by Seungcheol’s work, who found himself slamming his fingers back into you like a jackhammer. You slightly jump, vibrating around Wonwoo as you cried out obscenities.
“Mmph, more, please,” you beg, bringing a smile to both Seungcheol and Mingyu’s faces.
Seungcheol used another hand to give spanks on either one of your cheeks, playing with you like a set of drums. They get tender in his grasp, making them more fun to squeeze and there’s that pleasant way your backside jerks towards him, knowing he’s doing everything right.
It was then Mingyu had an idea. While his other friends handled you their way, he had no choice but to find his own choice of sport. He pulls himself up from the couch, excited to spring back into action, and goes on to grab something from your room. He disappears as quickly as he returns, a familiar transparent squeeze bottle in his hand. He goes on a knee to your side, squeezing the cold sticky substance on your unpreoccupied hole, squirting circles around your quivering rim.
“Remember when you thought we wouldn’t use this again? Looks like now’s the time. Are you ready for that?” He asks with a Cheshire smile as he closes the cap and puts the bottle aside.
You moan a confirmation, nodding your head complacently. His chuckles are sickly sweet as he draws his lips close to your ear, teasing his digit from entering. The moment it enters you mentally prepare yourself for the sensation, know damn well you could never get used to that. Mingyu groans at how you swallow his middle digit as he churns it inside you, another hand coming against your tender cheeks. “Fucking slut. Like us filling all your holes, hmm?”
There is no way you can physically answer as you feel yourself gag as you reach your limit with Wonwoo, who at this point doesn’t hear others and uses your mouth with only the thought of getting off down your throat. You finally croak out a yes before two of Wonwoo’s hands grip your head and slam you down the base when you least expected him to. Tears run down your eyes, your cheeks hot, feeling yourself suffocated, you dig your nails into Wonwoo’s thighs, white crescents appearing on his skin. 
He groans long and loud, jerking his hips as he’s dumping some of his load down your throat but pulls out from the overstimulation, having the rest shoot on your face. The translucent thick ribbons stain your cheeks and drip off your chin down to his thigh. Red face and a hot sweat beading from his forehead. Wonwoo finally collects himself enough to look back at you apologetically, visibly embarrassed.
“I’m so, so sorry, Y/n.”
Instead of letting him feel sorry for himself and you, you take Wonwoo’s hand and use it like a napkin, swiping his cum on his fingers. He’s stunned when he sees it, a quarry of your actions stuck and stopped at his throat until you take that hand and enter it in your mouth, your tongue catching his release. The man’s abdomen tense, letting your hand suck his fingers off clean and you hold them in there, filling your mouth with another body part of Wonwoo that day.
“Goddamnit, Y/n. You really can’t help yourself.” He comments blatantly lost in awe.
Your body curled up in Seungcheol’s lap helplessly, trembling, slick moisture seeping out of you at their mercy. The others can hear the anguish in your muffled voice, how close you get with fingers thrust inside you with only every passing second, only to have that ecstasy slip away as their fingers pull out. You whine in retaliation, their collective chuckles mocking you, even Wonwoo couldn’t help but find the scene amusing. 
“Can’t have you cum that quickly, can we?” Seungcheol taunts.
He roughly tugs up your body until your back is toward his chest, feeling your perspiration against his torso. He shrugs off his briefs and your underwear is quick to follow, the tips of his fingers now rubbing your arousal all around your entrance, adding the slick substance to your already lubed up rim. You mewl at his fingers, your hands gripping against his forearm but lacking the willpower to have an effect. His teeth graze your eye, pulling you by the cartilage. “We’re gonna fill you out so nice, you’ll beg for more
perfect little holes for us to use
tell us what you want, princess.”
You let out a shallow breath, “I want
to feel full. I want you inside me.”
His hand lands on his cock, hard and naturally aligned at your rim, before testing Mingyu's prep work, “Good girl
feeling so perfectly tight
”
Seungcheol can’t forget how it closed around him while he takes a long gradual stroke inside. He groans loudly, filling you until your moans give out. His hands plant against the backside of your thighs to lift them and fold them against you, pushing his length in. Your eyes rapidly shake, the white of them visibly, and you welcome Seungcheol’s cock with his name on your tongue. “F-fuck yes
more Seungcheol
”
Wonwon doesn’t know what gets over him when he finds himself staring back at your glistening folds, looking at your pulsing clit like it was the last m&m. His flaccid cock now twitching upright in his lap, he licks his lips, not taking his eyes away from you. “Seungcheol spread her legs out more.”
The elder man gave a knowing smile and did as requested, and your pussy stretches open, your clit more evident than before. Soon Wonwoo has mustered the strength to put his face up to your entrance and suck on the bulging nub like a straw, watching your toes curling as soon as he does. You can feel his subtle smiles against your arousal, the curve of it pulling at your folds.
“Shit,” you whisper, throwing your head back against Seungcheol’s shoulder, panting against the man’s cheek.
“Feels good, doesn’t it?” Seungcheol teases, “You haven’t gotten enough just yet.”
Mingyu gets up from where he sits, stroking his cock in his hand. He comes to your side, the tip of his length angles at your lips, and you look up at him in anticipation. He mocks you, tapping himself against your lips. “Beg for it. Go on. Whore.”
You sigh defeatedly, “Please, Mingyu
I need your cock in my mouth
”
“Isn’t that nice? You can shut up.” He chuckles to himself.
He takes hold of your head, prodding your lips apart with the head of his cock inside, and sees how easily it slides in your mouth. You moan around his girth, as the jerk of his hips pushed himself deeper inside you. It's almost how fast it happens just as you don’t remember how it began. All you knew was it felt amazing nothing like you ever felt. You never knew you could want this–no, you never knew how much you needed this.
“Want to fuck you, Y/n? Can I?” Wonwoo asks politely against your core.
You nod with your mouth full, coughing out Mingyu’s cock given the opportunity. “Yes, Wonwoo, I want you
I want all of you
please fuck me full
”
Saying that out loud was enough of a motive to flip the script. Seungcheol, still inside, lays flat against the couch, head propped against the couch arm. Wonwoo gives Mingyu a knowing look, letting his friend go first. Mingyu scoffs, “I’m coming for you, Y/n.”
“Not yet, you are,” You retort.
“And you said I’d never get be inside you again. Things can happen.”
Mingyu lets his cock slip around your arousal before he’s reunited with your fluttering walls, a nostalgic hum leaving his lips. “Fuck, that’s good.”
“Mingyu—You both—ah fuck, feels so g-good
”
Mingyu and Seungcheol carry a mismatched pace, their uneven breaths fill the air as you take it, take them. Your voice sounds of agony but rather the opposite, you couldn’t feel more bliss. Wonwoo mentally and physically readies himself, his cock almost back to full power. He joins the party when he feels the fire in him, thanking himself for getting a big enough couch, and hovering on top of you.
You hadn’t noticed it before but something was missing from the man joining, and not his clothing. “Your g-glasses
”
“Ah,” he smiles, “put them aside, didn’t want them to break.”
“Hmm, it’s n-nice looking you in the e-eyes for o-once.”
“I’ll make sure to make it happen more often
Tell me if I’m hurting you. If any of us do.”
You hum a yes, finding his lips reattach to yours soon after. Wonwoo gives himself one last stroke before its mere centimeters away from Mingyu’s, finding the right angle to join his friend. It’s not an easy feat sharing space, but he finds a way, pushing through to stretch you wide and open, collective moans coming from all ends.
“Holy shit,” you screech, “so many c-cocks
”
“You’re taking us so too, Princess. I knew you could do it,” Seungcheol exclaims.
Mingyu was getting a thrill out of this, “Of course she can, Y/n is a bigger dirty slut than she makes herself out to be. She enjoys it, hmm? Say it.”
“I en—love it. I love the cocks in me so much
”
“Shit, you’re so pretty for that,” Wonwoo claims on your neck, pounding now faster, “say that again for us please.”
“I love your cocks fucking me
fucking my pussy and ass
”
Mingyu missed how you gave your everything during sex, groaning louder and louder the tighter you try to clench, how closer he realizes he’s getting. “She’ll say anything to cum
don’t let her.”
Mingyu’s hand comes up from behind Wonwoo to slap your clit, pinching to hear you whine. “You cum too soon, we’ll just fuck you over and over again. I want white to cover every inch of your body, clear?”
“Y-yes
sir
”
“Perfect little whore.”
You feel the rutting in and out of you like clockwork, overwhelmed by all the different energies your body accepts. Your moans, your screams, or your tears could never tell the full story of the euphoria of your feeling. Your arms embrace Wonwoo, latching on his hair and face, kissing him on his swollen lips, and feeling hot to the point you could confuse it for inferno, or that you were part of inferno yourself.
Seungcheol swallows back his drool, blind in ecstasy flowing through him and now reaching up to the surface. His fingers dig deeper into your thighs and the sounds of skin slapping drown out his moans. Seungcheol clutches you against him as he whispers, “you okay with me cumming in your ass princess, hmm, is that what you want?”
“Yes,” You answer in a hushed tone, “please I want you to cum in my ass
”
You feel his relieved sighs on your neck, slamming his body into you harder. You’re stretched like elastic, wearing down at their rough touch, until Seungcheol does as promised, squeezing his load and shooting it up in gradually staggering pumps until he’s empty and drops his rubber covered cock out to drip back onto the fabric of the couch.
That had been your final straw, feeling your climax erupt only immediately after Seungcheol. “I’m cumming, I’m cumming, I’m cumming
”
Wonwoo kisses your cheek in response but doesn’t stop. Mingyu on the other hand slaps against your clit harder repeatedly, reveling in the wretched noise you make. “Cum all you want
we'll take it
like you’re gonna keep taking us.”
Wonwoo grunts alone by himself, Holding you against him like it's the last, helping Mingyu keep his word and fuck you senseless. He was a good friend, he was good at helping his friends. That friendly nature makes you weak to the sensitivity after, whining under their touch, shaking on top of Seungcheol, as he tenderly fondles your breasts in his rest. It feels endless, not like you’re complaining, but a somewhat bit of relief is obvious when both of the remaining men cum in you simultaneously.  Friends that cum together, stay together, you guess.
“You gonna take our cum?” Mingyu pokes, his cock ruts in you like a man with no control.
“Y-yes.” You choke out.
“Yes, what?”
“Yes, yes, I can take your cum, please. Please. Cum in my pussy, I need your loads in me.”
“Wait condoms? You guys aren’t wearing any?” Seungcheol voiced out.
Wonwoo shakes his head as Mingyu aguishly blurts out a “no.”
“Aw, fuck you guys.”
“Mmp, mmph,” that was the sound of Wonwoo biting into your shoulder, his sweet white dispersing into you perfectly with Mingyu to follow. Ther loads meshed well together like they do, becoming one with your climax, dripping out of your brim like oozing honey: sweet, creamy, sticky. The perfect symphony to showcase the perfect vessel, capable of catching their cum.
“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit—”
Mingyu moans out his climax just as you remember, just as voluminous and rich. He’d laugh if he knew how much you would think about hearing it again. Your tired bodies part from each other, panting loudly inches away from each other, staring mindlessly into the space in front of them. You were the particularly spent and Wonwoo, the first to notice and care, picks up by your knees and carries you, fulfilling his duties as your designated roommate. “You’re okay, right?”
“Mm, I’m good, Woo.” you softly respond in his arms, you turn to the other two men fatigued on the couch, “I’m taking a shower first, assholes. Only Wonwoo can join.”
Wonwoo smiles with a blush on his cheeks, while the others roll their eyes.
“What? Why only Wonwoo?” Seungcheol questions.
“He treated me nicer. Think about it the next time we all fuck.”
Wonwoo looks back at you with a surprised look before taking you away to the bathroom. You leave Mingyu and Seungcheol to look back at each other, pondering on your response, taking all the world, space, and time to process your words.
Simultaneously. “Next time?”
4K notes · View notes
m0llygunn · 9 months ago
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friends with b(aby)enefits (eddie munson x fem!reader)
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MONTH ONE: Just friends—what a silly concept. After your accident, Eddie's been a full-fledged comedian, ill-conceived jokes left and right... neither of you are laughing though when his 'comedy routine' comes back to bite the both of you in the ass.
cw: 18+!, mature language, smut, pinv sex (unprotected again smh), pet names, vomiting, a lot of pregnancy related topics, potentially dramatized pregnancy symptoms (for the plot obvi, also idk anything about pregnancy), mention of readers period, mention of birth control an: lots of minor time jumps/cuts but we get some eddie pov!!! wc: 8.3k+
0 / 01 / 02 / 03 / 04 / 05 / 06 / 07 / 08 / 09 / 00
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Arms wrapped around your waist from behind, both palms pressed flat to your belly.
“How are my girls doing today?”
Comically loud, heavily puckered kisses scattered over the top of your stomach, catching you by surprise— not at all expecting to be ambushed with facetious affection by your friend. 
Eddie thinks he’s a comedian. 
With about a month of his poor taste in jokes, he thinks he’s hilarious— and a self-proclaimed prophet because he 'just knows' that it's a baby girl. He's full of shit and you desperately try to not give him the benefit of finding his terrible jokes humorous. To your demise, from time to time, they get you.
His latest stunt was when he greeted you for your usual Friday get together. He swung the door open quick enough to stun you and immediately dropped to his knees. With a firm hold on your hips, he leaned in close to your belly, “Hi, baby girl. Did you miss daddy?” he cooed with big eyes and an even bigger smirk.
With a hand on his forehead, pushing him away, unfortunately you laughed, and unfortunately it feels like all of his jokes are coming back to bite the both of you in the ass. It’s hardly been 24 hours since the offending, but objectively funny joke, and neither of you are laughing now.
“Maybe you just ate something bad?” he offers with sheer, dumb, hope. “Or maybe it’s the flu?” he says, snapping his fingers together like he struck the gold mine of an idea.
Eddie can be as hopeful as he wants, but as you lower yourself down to the couch from vomiting your insides out in the bathroom, the panic in his eyes is evident.
“Maybe,” you reply dully, dropping your head to rest against the back of the couch. 
“Do you want to lay down? I can bring you to my bed?” he asks with concern lacing his words. 
“I’m—” you start, but with acid suddenly rising in your throat again, your eyes go wide and you jump from the couch with a renewed energy, just barely making it to the bathroom.
────────────
To put it plainly, you vomited two more times after. When you finally felt like you were done throwing up, with an empty stomach and a sore body, Eddie helped you to his bed and you slept off your spell of nausea. When you woke up a few hours later feeling a touch better, both of you decided the best choice would be to buy a pregnancy test. 
“Just to be safe, right?” he had said, eyes burning into you as you laid sprawled across his bed, feeling no longer nauseous, but instead like an empty shell of a person. “We should buy one, right?” he asked again, eyes growing wider in your silence. 
It felt like even moving your sight line to look at him took too much energy, but you met his gaze, and he nodded his head like he had made his own silent conclusion. 
“We’ll go after, okay?” he said, continuing his one-sided conversation. Standing from the edge of the bed he wiped his palms down the front of his thighs before straightening out and rubbing his hand down from his mouth to his chin. He nods a second time, doing what you assume is him coming to another silent conclusion. “I’ll get you crackers?” he continued, eyebrows raised. 
With your eyes locked on him, you swallowed the dryness in your mouth. You hadn’t done anything notable, hadn’t even attempted to answer him, but his face softened, mouth turning into a regretful frown. 
“Sorry you’re sick,” he said, bending down to pat your head, letting his thumb trace gently across your temple. It was a tender movement and you absorbed the warmth of his contact, letting your eyes blink shut. “I’ll get you water too, okay? Water and crackers and we’ll see how you feel after that.”
Eddie’s a lot of things, but nurturing and soft, and with high levels of compassion is not exactly how you would describe him. He can be those things, but principally, he’s more of an asshole— but one that you love enough to keep around, obviously. But an asshole, nonetheless. The last time you had the flu he laughed at you and made fun of the way you threw up, albeit, it was when you both were in your teens, but regardless, he was a dickhead about it— and most recently, when you had gotten a cold, he ceaseless made fun of your constant sneezing and the blazing red tone of your sore nose from blowing it so much, calling you Rudolf and asking how ‘Big Red’ was doing at this time of the year. Asshole.
Dichotomously to the Eddie you’ve known all these years, he grazes the backside of his knuckles across your cheek, rubbing them back and forth gently. It's painfully obvious he doesn’t do this often from the way his hand jerks, finger nearly poking you in the eye, but you appreciate the notion. You know you must really look awful if he’s managed to compose this much compassion for you. 
────────────
They say that nothing makes people more productive than the last minute. As the pharmacy's closing time approached, it was only then when either of you felt so inclined to even mention going to get the test.
After Eddie got you your water and crackers, you started feeling much better, and feeling much better meant it was easy to pretend like nothing had happened. You both unhealthily and aggressively ignored your potential futures by acting like it was any regular Saturday evening. You talked about your upcoming work week, and watched the usually shitty reruns on TV. Eddie made some freezer-burnt chicken nuggets, you warmed up some soup, and it was boring and uneventful, but it was the most comforting that boring and uneventful could be. 
The sun began to set and it was like the ticking of Wayne's alarm clock on the coffee table beside you only got louder and louder as time went on. 
“S’almost eight,” Eddie had eventually mumbled. You swallowed, keeping your eyes on the TV as you found this particular old rerun episode of Mama’s Family to be the most interesting thing in the world, which is odd considering you usually change the channel whenever it's on. 
With both of you sitting at the couch, feet kicked up, resting side by side on the coffee table, Eddie moves his foot far enough to just barely knock yours— an attempt to pull your attention away from the screen.
“The show’s almost done,” you say, turning your head towards him but keeping your eyes on the TV.
“The pharmacy closes at eight.”
“I feel fine,” you shrug.
Moving your feet from the tabletop, Eddie copies you, putting his feet down on the floor, but he goes a step further, sitting up from the couch. He stands, facing you, but you keep your eyes on the TV, ignoring him fivefold. He props his hand on his hip, arm bent at the elbow, one foot tap away from looking like someone's mother. You ignore him tenfold. 
“You want to stay here while I go?”
“Go where?”
“You’re fucking with me, aren’t you?” he laughs. You can hear the amusement in his voice. His hand drops from his hip and you look at him to see the smirk written across his face.
“Go where?” you double down. Huffing a laugh from his nose, he turns, opting to get himself ready, and begrudgingly, you do too. With your feet dragging through every step, you get in the car, and Eddie drives the two of you to the pharmacy. 
────────────
Under the bright, white fluorescent lights of aisle number eight, you and Eddie stare your potential future down. An unnerving amount of tests sit on the shelf at eye level, some with cute little daisy packaging, others looking sterile and pharmaceutical. 
“Why are there so many options?” Eddie asks, picking one up and flipping it to read the back. You look at the price tags and your mouth nearly drops to the floor. 
“Why are they so expensive?” you ask, taking the box out of his hand and putting it back on the shelf.
“Hey,” he objects, reaching out for it. “That one says response in twenty minutes.” 
“That one is, like, twice as much as that one,” you argue, pointing to another test.
“Yeah,” he says, grabbing the test from the shelf. “That one says a two hour response,” he continues, pointing at the exaggerated font on the front of the test in his hand, waving it in your face. “I’d rather be shitting my pants for twenty minutes than two hours.”
He’s acting normal, braggart and teasing, you can’t muster that same energy. Your stomach swirls and squeezes and does everything it shouldn’t do. Nerves or nausea, you’re not sure. A ceiling light flickers two aisles over and you can’t stand being here.
“Maybe
” you pause. Your hands start to turn clammy. “Maybe we shouldn’t get any,” you say, shifting in place. You turn to fully face Eddie, looking at him as he has a boxed test pulled close to his face, reading the side of it. “Maybe we should just go home.” 
Eddie turns to you, brows furrowed. “No— what? You just spent the whole day throwing up, we gotta get something,” he says, looking at you like you’re insane. The ceiling light flickers again and you definitely feel insane. 
It wasn’t the whole day, it was just the morning, you nearly object until you realize it doesn’t help your case. 
Bringing your hand to your mouth, you chew on the edge of your nail, distracting yourself from the tremble in your limbs. From left to right and back again, you flutter your sight over the different options. There’s too many. Too many and it’s overwhelming. 
“Hey,” Eddie says softly. The weight of his arm settles around your shoulder, pulling you so that your bicep meets the edge of his chest in a half hug. “Don’t be nervous,” he continues, in a low coo. You step inwards, turning the half hug into a full hug. Taking a deep breath, all you can muster is a short nod of your head. 
His arm moves from your shoulder, hand grazing down to your mid back. Focusing your attention on his touch, you take another deep breath, inhaling his familiar scent. Smoky, woodsy, and a contradicting sweetness from whatever shampoo that was probably the cheapest and on sale.
“We’ll be fine, remember? You probably just ate something bad.” he says. He rubs his hand up between your shoulder blades and back down. You want to believe him, you really do. 
“I’m scared,” you say quietly.
“Why?” he asks, voice just as small as yours. 
“It
 it doesn’t feel like I ate something bad.” You swallow down the jagged edges of emotion that your voice gets stuck on. His hand, mid rub, pauses and you pull away enough to see him. His eyes glaze over with something you’re unsure of before he quickly blinks it back. 
“Well
” he swallows. “What does it feel like then?” he asks, brows turned upwards. He's nervous, you’re nervous, and the light flickers again, reminding you where you are. 
“Can we go home? Please.” Your nerves become far too jittery and it’s starting to turn into nausea again. Your stomach lurches and Eddie watches you for another moment, eyes searching yours until he nods, patting your back before pulling away.
“Yeah. I’ll just buy this one and we can go.” He takes your hand in his, twenty-minute-test in the other, and he guides you to the front of the store. 
────────────
“It’s almost nine now, so it’ll be ready at
”
“9:20,” you say when Eddie takes a concerning amount of time doing the math. The ride home was quiet. Being out of the fluorescence helped your nerves, and as you got further and further away from the pharmacy, and closer and closer to Eddie’s place, you started to feel normal again. 
“I knew that, I was just
 thinking,” he responds. He sits up from where he was crouching in front of the dresser, using it as a table to put together the test. 
Decidedly, it was just nerves that had put you on edge, that’s it. The test is nothing but precautionary, just to rule out what could have made you sick. Eddie joins you, sitting on the edge of the bed. 
“Uh— before, we get a response,” he pauses, wringing his hands together. His eyes move down to his lap and your chest tightens. “I just want to say that whatever it is
 I don’t regret what we did
 and whatever it is, I’ll be there
 for my girls.” 
He looks at you, his smirk widening by the second, and you can’t help the snort of laughter from escaping. Like every other ill-timed joke that he's pervasively told over the last month or so, he gets you, and you appreciate it this time as it lessens the gnawing feeling in your belly.
Despite the joke, when you really look at him, with his lips spread in a smile, his eyes swarm with the same trepidations that you feel. He’s a comedian but even the comedian is human. You try your hand at lightening the mood. 
“What if it’s not a girl?” you ask, playing along. He smiles, bumping his shoulder into yours as he huffs a breath from his nose. Shaking his head in an almost mirthful way you think you were successful until his demeanour drops into something serious. 
“What did you mean earlier?” he asks “When you said that it doesn’t feel like you ate something bad?”
“I just— I don't know. I just, I thought I had a feeling,” you explain. Eddie hums, eyes now set forward on the test. “I think I was just nervous, that’s all.” 
Twenty minutes has never felt longer. Eddie accepts your answer at face value but doesn’t do much to show it. He doesn't do much in general, and neither do you. At the ten minute mark, his hand found your knee. At the fifteen minute mark you were curled under his arm, resting your head on his chest as he rubbed up and down your arm. In the last minute, you had taken his hand in yours, playing with his fingers as you watched the seconds tick by on his Casio watch. 
21:19:59 turned to 21:20:00, and you turned to Eddie. Synchronously and in silence, you parted from each other. He stood and you sat. He moved to the dresser, and you held your breath. 
With his back facing you, you watch with unblinking eyes as he reaches for the instructions. Humming to himself, your lungs ache. You try to parse the meaning behind his tone, or vibration, or pitch — or anything that could give way to what he's seeing, but it’s far too vague. Taking a deep and vital breath, filling your choking lungs, you're just about to ask, mouth already open when he speaks.
“It says negative.”
“It says negative?” you parrot in disbelief.
“Negative.” Eddie firmly answers.
There’s no way. You should feel a weight lift from you, but, evident avoidance aside, that feeling is still there, stronger if anything.
“I
” you start, interrupting the loud beat of silence. “I’m not saying I want to be pregnant
 but I think it’s wrong, Eddie.”
“Wrong? How could it be wrong?” he says, turning around to look at you. 
“I don’t know,” you shrug. “Aren’t they, like, only guaranteed to work like 95% of the time?”
“That’s still a lot of the time,” he says, copying your shrug.
“Yeah
 but—” you shake your head, stopping yourself. This is what you wanted right? Why would you fight against the answer that you mostly hoped for? That you were already certain about in the car barely an hour ago. “Whatever. It’s probably right. I think
 I think I’m just
 tired.”
Eddie nods, agreeing with you. He turns enough to set the test down, abandoning cleanup for another time— gross, but when he asks you if you’re going to sleep over, you willingly ignore the unsanitary act of leaving a used pregnancy test to sit and simmer bacteria growth. 
“You gonna sleep here?”
“Can I?’
“Of course,” he laughs.
────────────
If it were a peaceful morning, you would have woken up to the warm, red tinted sun coming into Eddie’s room through the maroon coloured bed-sheet-turned-blinds. 
If it were a peaceful morning you would have woken up to shared warmth, his arm just barely tossed over your hip, hand resting in the dip of your waist. 
If it were a peaceful morning you would have been able to bask in the meaning of having him beside you— what it meant beyond just shared warmth, what it meant beyond friendship. 
If it were a peaceful morning, oh, if it were a peaceful morning

If it were a peaceful morning, you wouldn’t have woken up to rising bile in your throat and your heart hammering in your chest. It's not a peaceful morning, it's a race against time. With your hand cupped to your mouth, ripping yourself from the shared tangled sheets, tripping your way to the bathroom over the crap on the floor, time almost wins. 
You made it by a stroke of luck with not a second to spare.
────────────
“It must be the flu,” you had croaked weakly. Eddie nodded, looking at you with tired eyes that had been startled awake by your fumbling and awful retching.
“Yeah, it’s definitely the flu.” It was not a whole hearted agreement, but there was no way any bad food would still be in your system. And with a negative pregnancy test, the flu is the only answer. Obviously.  
The next day, in the quietness of your apartment, you kept a preemptive bowl next to your bed, just in case.
Thank god you did because it was the worst it’s been yet, and with your temperamental luck, you would not have made it to the bathroom this time.
────────────
“Hello?” Eddie answered from the other end of the telephone line. 
Your untouched breakfast sits on the table as you stand in front of your wall-hanging phone, leaning against the counter to stop yourself from keeling over entirely. 
“It's me.” 
“Oh, hey, didn’t think I’d hear from you so early, what's up?” His near chipper attitude is grating and if you could strangle someone through the phone you might have muscled up the last of your strength and considered it. 
“I’m still sick.” If you sound as awful as you feel, and equally as annoyed, it's because you are every terrible emotion in the dictionary. You are the essence of a bad mood, a side effect of how sick you’ve been.
“Shit—” he cursed. “I have work in thirty but I can stop by after?”
“Yeah, you already told me you were working,” you snark, because obviously he has work. It’s Monday.
“Do you want me to stop by after?
“I'm just telling you that I’m still sick.”
The call lulls and you can hear a slight rustle from the other end.
“I’m sorry,” he says.
“Why are you sorry?”
“Because you’re sick and I feel bad,” he says, voice turning up like he's asking you if that is an alright answer. It’s not, and you twirl the phone cord between your fingers, distracting yourself from scoffing and saying something you know you’ll regret. 
The call lulls for another moment and he clears his throat, coughing right into the receiver. 
“Uh— aside from being sick
 everything else okay?” he asks tentatively, pausing too frequently that it annoys you, even more so than you already are.
“I’m fine, I just feel like garbage.”
“Nothing else bothering you? I have a minute, we can talk?”
“I said I’m fine.”
“You’re— and don’t bite my head off— but you’re not on your period?”
“Why would you ask that?” You meet his stupidity with a harsh and rightfully deserved defensiveness. “Don’t you think I would tell you if I was? You know, all things considered.” 
His voice raises as he comes to his own defence. “Well, I just thought
 'cause you thought that maybe there was a chance that the test was wrong, but then we agreed it wasn’t and
”
“And?”
“And you’re in a bad mood.”
You hang up the phone and when it rings again, you let it. 
────────────
Eddie spent the whole day being eaten alive by his thoughts. You said you had a feeling, and Eddie knows you well enough to know you wouldn’t joke around about stuff like this. He would, he has, but you wouldn't.
Since the moment you told him that you weren’t on birth control, he had been thinking about it. Hypothetically, having a kid with you wouldn’t be the worst. He’d actually
 like it
 maybe? Would he say that to you? No, but it's not an awful thought.
Sure he made jokes out of it, but that was just his ill mannered way of accepting the fact that he kind of, maybe, potentially, would like having a kid with you
 and being more than just friends. But he could never tell you that, so he made stupid, stupid jokes. 
But now that having a baby with you is less hypothetical, he’s fucking scared. Not because it’s with you, but because he might be having a fucking baby. That’s terrifying in and of itself. 
When you first started feeling sick, he let himself really believe for about an hour that maybe you had eaten something bad, but in his heart of hearts, he knew. There was no way. Four weeks and 3 days after he came inside you— not that he's keeping track of the days— and you’re suddenly experiencing ‘food poisoning’, even though you didn’t eat anything particularly abnormal or poison-like?
You’re pregnant. So fucking pregnant. There’s no way you’re not. 
“Hey, Bill. You have kids, right?” Eddie had asked as he sat down at the break table with one of his more favourable colleagues. 
Bill, more or less his mentor— or more eloquently put, the kind soul that's been helping him work his way up to being an actual mechanic and not just the guy who cleans and sweeps up after them like he’s been doing for the last year and a bit. He’s an older gentleman, doesn’t do much small talk, is in a permanent old man bad attitude, but he’s a good guy— reminds him of Wayne at times. Eddie trusts him enough, especially not to go talking about him around town. 
“Uh-huh. Grandkids too,” he answers, barely looking up from his newspaper. Eddie knew this of course, but he couldn't think of any other way to approach the topic. 
“Right, sorry,” Eddie apologizes, wringing his hands out of nervousness and dragging out the point of interrupting Bill’s lunch break.  
“You gonna be a father?” Bill asks bluntly.
Father? Eddie's familiar with a particular ‘F’ word, uses it way too fucking much in fact. Father, on the other hand, is an ‘f’ word that was barely in his vocabulary, he could go weeks without letting that word pass through his thoughts, let alone it being a descriptor of his very own character. 
Eddie’s eyes widen, mouth dropping open as his breath stutters like a kid getting caught red handed. “No.” he stumbles to answer. “Uh— maybe. I don’t know. We don’t know.”
“So what are you askin’?”
“Your girlfriend— uh, wife—”
“Wife,” Bill answers with an annoyed ring to it. 
“Right, your wife
 What was she like when she got pregnant?” 
Bill shakes his head, ignoring the question. “Did she take a test? They have those now. Can buy ‘em at the store,” he gruffs.
“We did, but it was negative. She
 she said they’re wrong sometimes though, and she thought that
 she thought that maybe it was wrong?”
Bill sets down his newspaper, the edges of both his fists meeting the surface of the table top. He looks to Eddie, catching his flighty eye contact, giving him his full attention.
“Morning sickness?”
“She’s been sick the last couple of days.”
“Hormonal?”
“Hormonal?” Eddie asks, quirking a brow. Bill rolls his eyes, not unlike how Wayne has done time after time.
“Bad mood? Mood swings?”
“Kind of?”
“I won’t go into detail because I respect my wife,” Bill says, eyeing Eddie through slanted eyes. “Any changes that aren’t to do with her mood?” he asks, looking down the slope of his nose.
“Huh?” Eddie thinks hard, trying to decipher what Bill means. Bill gives Eddie an encouraging nod that quickly turns short-tempered.
“Her body? Any changes?” Bill grumps.
“Oh.” Eddie’s eyes go wide. “Uh— I don't know. She’s not really my girlfriend, we’re just friends.” 
“Just a friend you got pregnant?” Bill’s near-permanent-scowl breaks into a smile, lips turning at the corners in a sadistic way, eyes gleaming with taunting amusement. Eddie feels his palms start to sweat. 
“So you think she’s pregnant?”
“I think you’re up shits creek with a turd for a paddle, kid. Gettin’ a friend pregnant,” he scoffs, shaking his head as he laughs to himself. He fixes his newspaper back upright, picking up where he left off in the classifieds. 
“Well, we’re good friends. I— she
 we—” Eddie thinks about telling him that it’s you— Bill knows of you. Eddie’s talked about you enough, but he bites his tongue for the same reason that he didn’t go to Wayne about this— it would be all, ‘just ask her out’, ‘quit pussyfootin’ ‘round it,’ but he doesn’t get it, he can’t just ask you out. He—
“You like her more than a friend.” Bill says, making Eddie freeze. He opens his mouth to speak, to deny, to confirm, to anything, but nothing comes out. “Oh you got it bad, huh?” Bill continues with a teasing smile.
“C’mon, it’s not—” Eddie tries to object but Bill sees right through it. 
“You love her?”
“I
” Eddie swallows, thinking over his answer. “I don’t know
maybe?”
“Well, you got an interesting journey ahead of yous if she really is pregnant,” he laughs again.
And with that entirely unhelpful conversation, Eddie spent the rest of the day not only ruminating on you being pregnant, but now, his feelings for you as well. 
────────────
After work he went straight home, showered, got redressed in sweats and the cleanest shirt he could find and beelined straight for your apartment. He made one quick stop at the pharmacy but quicker than even he anticipated, he was at your front door. 
He knocked, and then there you were, opening the door for him, not exactly smiling— but not looking angry either, or sick, which is a good start.
Greeting him with a quiet ‘hello’, you opened the door wider. He stepped into your apartment, and like he mentally rehearsed, he leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to your cheek. Before he could look at your reaction, he turned, hiding his face behind the curtain of his still damp hair, and kicked his shoes off. 
He’s just trying to get back on your good side. After this morning— your bad mood, and then him only making it worse by asking if you were on your period, which he knew you weren’t because you said that it's been weird since you stopped birth control but
 yeah, he’s just trying to get on your good side, definitely not anything more than that. 
Clearing his throat and praying his cheeks aren’t as flushed as they feel, he tries to move on. “How’re you doing?” he asks. You spare him, and you don’t mention the kiss nor give him any weird reactions— which is good, right? You would tell him off if you didn’t want him to kiss you, right?
“I’m doing fine now,” you reply, turning to lead him to the kitchen. He follows behind, humming an acknowledgement. At your counter is a full, waiting dish that looks like and smells like spaghetti. You sit back in your seat, and he takes the one next to it, putting his brown shopping bag down in front of him. 
He watches you as you bring a forkful of your dinner to your mouth. “You’re eating, you must not be feeling sick anymore?”
“No, I stopped feeling sick around lunch and then I was starving,” you say through a second mouthful, swirling your third bite around the fork. 
“Nice,” he nods. Eddie’s not sure of much, not now, hardly ever, but you feeling better around lunch means you only felt sick in the morning, and you being sick in the mornings falls exactly under the conditions of morning sickness
 and that means

Swallowing down his thoughts in a thick gulp, he reaches for the pharmacy bag. “Well, I bought another test just in case,” he rushes out quickly, moving to take out the good part of his shopping haul to lessen the blow if the test somehow pisses you off. “—and I also bought you—”
“Liquorice! Oh my god and popcorn,” you say excitedly, interrupting him with the loud crinkles of you grabbing for the package of candy, quickly ripping it open. 
Eddie watches you closely, the way your eyes light up for some of your favourite foods. He was taking a risk, buying you snacks when he knew that you’ve been sick but it was that or flowers and flowers seemed a little too
 forward?
Your reaction to the snacks though, it’s not abnormal, but it’s not exactly normal either
 a bit too
 ravenous? To be fair, you were sick and now you’re feeling better, maybe you are just extra hungry
. But then again, there's also your bad mood earlier and sure you felt like shit from being sick, but you were usually pretty happy whenever you talked to him. He wasn’t used to all of these
 mood swings.
Symptom after symptom, his thoughts finally bubble out. “I think you should take the test again,” he says, interrupting you as you rip open the bag of popcorn. You pause and he holds his breath.
With a shrug, you resume your movements, reaching into the bag and grabbing a handful. “But I feel fine?” you say, waving Eddie off.
“I think
 maybe just in case?”
“Here, sit down, I’ll get you some spaghetti,” you ignore him, standing from your seat. “It’s so good, I swear. This is my second plate full.” You grab a dish from the cupboard, serving some up from a pot on the stove top without waiting for a reply from Eddie— not that he had one, he was too stunned by your unconcerned mood to think of one. 
Adding a slice of garlic bread to the side of the dish, you place it down in front of him, quickly moving back to your own seat to dig into the popcorn and finish your own meal. 
“You didn’t go to work today?” he asks after mumbling a polite thank you.
“No, I called in. When I got the promo, I got like six extra sick days, plus vacation time, so I figured I might as well use them,” you shrug indifferently.
“Yeah,” Eddie nods, taking a quick glance at you before looking back to his plate of food, moving his fork around the plate absentmindedly. “Do you happen to have
 better insurance with your job now?” he asks, attempting to match your aloofness.
You pause your fork before shoving it in your mouth, opting to turn to look at Eddie. He purposely avoids your eye contact, continuing to swirl his fork in his food.
“Why?”
“Just curious,” he shrugs. “Whenever I get my promo—” he pauses. “—if I get the promo, Coop gives out some shitty insurance plan. Was just wondering what you were getting these days,” he continues nervously.
“I have insurance.”
“Good.”
“Why’s it good?” you ask, squinting your eyes at him.
“Is it not good? You get sick, you don’t have to pay as much— I think that’s objectively good.”
“Fine,” you relent. You stare at him for another moment, but when you finally go back to your food, Eddie lets out a long breath that he was holding in before going back to his food.
He finishes his plate while lost in a daze of thoughts. There’s no way you weren’t pregnant. Absolutely no way. He doesn’t know much about pregnancy, that’s for sure, but this is checking off every single box in his very limited knowledge of symptoms. 
He only withdrew from his head when he felt you staring at him yet again. You had pushed your plate back on the counter, head resting in the palms of your hands as you watched him intently with a particular glint of something in your eyes, something that he’s only seen two other times.
“Hi?” he says shyly, cheeks tingeing pink. 
“You kissed me on the cheek when you came in,” you state.
“Yeah, I did,” he nods, cheeks deepening to crimson under your close watch. 
“Do you want to stay the night?” you ask, stretching your leg out under the counter, running your foot along his shin.
Eddie chokes on his food before looking at you with wide eyes. Elbow bent to cover his mouth as he clears his throat from his sputtering, his eyebrows raise high, hiding under his bangs as he works through your suggestion. 
“Like stay the night or just stay the night?” he asks, eyes burning into you out of shock. 
“I just kept thinking about before
 and, you know
” you say, shrugging, hooking your foot around his calf.
“So like, stay the night?” he asks, eyes glimpsing down at your outstretched leg. 
With a sly smile, you nod your head making Eddie’s eyes grow even wider.
“Are you sure?” 
“I’m really sure.” 
Eddie takes a final bite of his food before pushing back in his chair. You excitedly stand, taking Eddie’s hand and leading him to your room. 
Maybe it’s a stupid thing to do when you’re both still up in arms about being pregnant, but Eddie would be a fool to say no to you. He physically couldn’t, has never had it in him. It doesn’t help that he really likes you and might potentially love you. And after all, he’s just a simple man. 
────────────
“Harder.” 
Your desirous voice echoing off of wallpapered bedroom walls, airy moans embellishing every thrust, Eddie does his best to give you what you want. Round two and countless of your orgasms later, you’re still begging Eddie to keep going.
Round one was fantastic. Sincerely earth shattering and left him winded and full heartedly wishing he took up track in his freshman year instead of smoking cigarettes. 
The night started with you riding him, insisting that he laid back, and who was he to say no to that? He watched you intently, grasping at your hips with each rise and fall, feeling the way your body nearly trembled over his own as you made yourself feel better and better. He was completely enamoured by the way your mouth rounded into a perfect oval, the way your eyes welled as you rose up and down, enjoying yourself truly and utterly. Then, when he took over, you were begging, whimpering, and moaning for him. He swore he had never came that hard in his life. 
With the long day of worrying and his stress induced sleepless nights wearing on him, he was nearly nodding off when you were on him for round two. It was exciting— you needing him like this, and his cock was kicking up again before he could process it. 
You came again, adding another tally to the growing tab of how many times you’ve come tonight. This time, you were on your hands and knees, back in a deep arch as he watched the recoil of your ass with each of his thrusts. 
The only thing on his mind was you. How you felt so perfect around his cock, how pretty you sounded whining and begging for him to keep going, how beautiful you are, and how badly he just wanted to keep making you feel good, but then it was like a switch flipped in his head. 
He heard it once, how pregnant women would sometimes get really horny. Insatiably horny— and you just kept asking for more, begging for him to keep going. You were cumming and still managing to ask him to keep going. He had never had sex like this before.
His skin that had grown damp throughout the night, covered in a permanent sheen of sweat, now drew dry, just like his mouth. His thighs burned, his calves begged for a break, his balls were aching from staving off his own release, and now there was very little uncertainty in his mind that you weren’t pregnant. 
Mid thrust, you clench around him, stealing his already stolen breath, pulling from his meandering thoughts. He refocuses his gaze on the bounce and jiggle of your ass and the sweet noises singing from your lips before letting his palms slide down the slope of your arched back, giving himself better leverage to keep going. 
There's no doubt in his mind that he can finish this round. Not only would he feel like an asshole if he tapped out now, but he would also feel like the biggest idiot because this has been it for him. This is the orbiting thought in his mind, the exact scenario that he conjures up in his imagination during his alone time. 
Swallowing thickly and taking an open mouth breath, he moves a hand from your back to wrap around your torso, finding your clit with his finger tips. “One more. Gonna give you one more, pretty girl,” he rasps, voice horse and ragged from his near panting. Your back arches even deeper, hips pressing back into his as you let out a wavered moan. 
“Feels so good, Eddie. Love your cock, feels so good,” you cry, taking heavy, moaning breaths between words, your voice staggering with each of his thrusts that push you further up into the mattress. 
“Mhm, know you love it, baby. Sucking me right in, n' so wet for me," Eddie says through exasperated breaths, words coming out babbled from his focus on not cumming as your walls squeeze him harder and harder.
“Want you to cum inside me again,” you whimper out. Eddie doesn’t answer, he just thrusts harder, rolling his hips against your backside, making you moan louder and giving you the last of every ounce of energy he has left in him.
When he feels your pussy start to flutter, tensing, and pulsating around him again, he knows you're close.
“Gonna cum for me, baby?” he breathes, voice only getting lower and more ragged from the absolute marathon of a night.
“Gonna cum, Eddie.” Your voice rises so high in volume that Eddie's certain your neighbours can hear. 
“Cum for me baby, wanna feel you squeeze my cock one last time tonight,” he grunts, starting to feel delusional with the way his head spins. He grips his free hand on your hip, pressing his fingers into your skin and grounding himself to you, trying to push away some of the daze to think clearly. 
Eddie feels your tightness pulling him in almost immediately. He holds off his own release for as long as he can, bringing you through your orgasm until he can’t take it anymore. He pulls out just in time for his own release, sending his cum spurting over your lower back as his chest practically explodes, burning lungs having all the air expelled from them in a wheeze as he stutters through his orgasm. 
After taking a few, long moments to catch his breath, he reaches for the same towel he used earlier, wiping you clean before falling to your side feeling absolutely exhausted.
“Wanted you to cum inside,” you say pitifully, cuddling closer to him.
“Can’t, you're not on birth control, we didn’t have a condom.”
“You did it before,” you pout. 
“Yeah.” Eddie says, exhaling deeply. 
Yeah and now he's 99.9% sure you’re pregnant. 
“It’s late, got work tomorrow,” Eddie says, eyes unwillingly fluttering closed as you push your way closer to him, pressing your bare chest to his, speckling gentle kisses along his neck.
“Are you sure?” you ask, pressing another kiss to his skin. He barely has the energy to respond and you deflate against him with a sigh.
“Baby,” he coos, frowning when he looks at your lower lip jetting out in a pout. As much as he’d love to keep going, he physically could not go for another round. His cock might let him despite it feeling nearly raw from all the friction, but his aching body definitely would not. “Let me just hold you, okay? We can cuddle,” he offers to try to fix your frown. It only works the slightest bit, relaxing the crinkle in between your brows.
He wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you into his hold. You let out a quiet whine at first, clearly upset, but you eventually relax into him, melding to his side. It’s not long before Eddie’s out cold, completely wiped clean of energy. 
────────────
You woke up, ripping yourself from Eddie’s grasp, hand over your mouth, rushing for the bathroom again. Eddie follows behind you, barely alert, but at your side, rubbing your back.
When you were certain everything inside your stomach was gone, you sat back, leaning against the edge of the tub.
“Think I should take that test.” 
“Yeah, I think so too.” 
────────────
With the anticipation of waiting another painstaking twenty minutes, you sit on the ledge of the tub in your bathroom, watching Eddie’s back as he tinkers with the test again. The tailbone pain from sitting on the ceramic edge is nothing compared to the swirling nausea growing from your nervousness.
He had sat with you for a few minutes like the last time, but got up halfway through to get you water. He dallyed in the kitchen for a few minutes, and it was far too casual for you, especially too casual for the dramatic dungeon master himself. It was almost unnerving. 
At the fifteen minute mark, he sat with you again, throwing an arm around your shoulder, and you couldn't help but nuzzle into him. If his casualness was him disguised his nervousness, he doesn’t let on. 
This time, at the twenty minute mark, his watch beeped the grating default Casio alarm, and with the chime of a button being pressed, he stands, turning his back to you as faces the vanity. You don’t follow him, you couldn’t at this point, you feel welded to the tub ledge. 
Unlike last time, he doesn’t look at the instructions. He doesn’t hum. He doesn’t make any noise, he just turns to you, his body blocking the test. You feel your heart rate pick up, but he doesn’t give anything away with facial expressions or body language. 
His mouth opens, he takes a breath, you hold yours once again. 
“Well
” he starts. “You were right.” His tone is flat and you blink, trying to clear your confusion.
“I was right?” 
“Yeah.” he shrugs. “About the last test being wrong.”
“No.” 
“Yup,” he affirms, putting a plosive pop at the end of the word. Too casual.
With your heart pounding in your chest, thumping miles in minutes, you couldn’t process this even if you wanted to, so you don’t. You deny it. 
“You’re lying,” you state, ending your words with a light huff of laughter. Surely, this is all a joke. Eddie’s a comedian, right? Ill-conceived jokes left and right over the last month, this has to be one of them.
He doesn’t smile. His eyes don’t light up. He doesn’t laugh. “Come look,” he says, beckoning you over with a tilt of his head. 
You sit up from the ledge of the tub, moving to stand next to Eddie at the counter. He pulls out the instructions, pointing to a diagram.
“If the liquid turns blue, that means pregnant."
You look at the test, not bothering to look where Eddie points. Blue liquid sits where any other colour should be.
“It’s blue,” you state.
“Pregnant.” 
Pregnant.
The moment is eerily still. In the movies this is where the happy couples jump with excitement. In TV shows, they call family and let them know their good news. In commercials, they celebrate. They hug, they smile, they cry happy tears together. 
Eddie’s your best friend, but you’re not a couple, this wasn’t planned. So you both stand in silence, staring at the positive test.
“What do we do?” you ask, swallowing the lump in your throat.
“We could go get something to eat? I can call out and we can rent a movie or something?”
“Something to eat?” you laugh. It’s positive and he’s thinking about eating?
“Yeah, you should try to eat something,” he shrugs, turning to look at you. 
“Eddie. I’m—” Pregnant, you go to say but the word dies on your tongue. “Why are you not freaking out?” you say, staring at him with wide eyes trying to understand how he’s not affected at all by this. You’ve known Eddie a long time and he’s not exactly the calm and collected type. 
“Well
” he shrugs. “When you said that you thought the first one was wrong, I trusted you more than the test. Believe me, I’ve been freaking out, but now
 it’s, kind of, settled in already, I guess.”
“Settled in?” you say, jaw dropping in shock. It’s your body, you were mostly certain you were pregnant— in denial at times, yes, but you knew, yet having it confirmed is still shell-shocking. How has it already ‘settled in’ for him?
“Yeah,” he shrugs. “If you want to keep it, I’m happy. If not, I’ll support you.”
“Happy?” you say, bewildered. 
“Well
 yeah. We’ve... we've been friends forever. A kid that’s part you and part me? That’s fucking awesome, how could I not be happy, y’know?” he says, moving backwards to sit on the ledge of the tub. He leans forward with his hands on his knees, watching you with eyes that are too calm. Too, too, too calm about this. 
In your quiet mental chaos, you take a final look at the blue liquid before moving to sit next to him. Your skin prickles with cold shivers but you feel hot all over, like there's a flame of nerves in your belly and a hot air balloon in your chest making each breath feel laboured. 
“I’m
” you stumble over your words. “I— pregnancy is so— Eddie,” you breathe out. Your eyes inevitably start to water.  
“Pregnancy is so Eddie?” he laughs before turning towards you, noticing your eyes turning glossy. His face drops immediately, features turning soft as his brows turning up in concern. “Hey,” he hushes. “It’s okay. We’ll be fine, remember? Everything will be fine,” he assures you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder again, bringing you closer to him in a hug. 
“I know, I just—” you force a breath in your lungs. “I don’t know why I’m crying.”
“You can cry, it's okay,” he says quietly, and unfortunately, each of his nearly-whistled, whispered consonants pulls out a wave of fresh tears from you. His hand rubs over your shoulder and your cheeks only grow damper. “It’s okay to cry,” he repeats and you press your face to the cotton of his shirt. He pulls you in tighter, rubbing your back in long, steady strokes. 
Eddie’s seen you cry more than a handful of times— more than several handfuls of times, but this is substantial— it just feels different. Different because you’re pregnant. You’re going to have a baby. A baby with Eddie. Your best friend Eddie. Eddie, who you’ve had sex with three times. Eddie, who you’ve known forever, who you’ve spent day after day with, as a friend. Friends. You’re pregnant. Holy shit. 
Your mind races and you divert your thoughts before you stray down that road. “It’s gonna be half you and half me,” you say, mostly to yourself, repeating his earlier sentiment. 
“Half you, half me,” he echoes. He presses a kiss to the top of your head and yeah, this is different— different because Eddie doesn’t kiss you on the top of your head. He doesn’t give you kisses on the cheek either. Eddie’s given you noogies, he’s butted foreheads with you, even flicked you on numerous occasions, all particularly during your shared middle school years, but kisses? Kisses are unheard off. What you guys have been doing lately is unheard of. 
“We had sex and now we’re having a baby,” you state plainly, trying to bring any coherency to the situation, desperately needed to hear the unheard of.
“We did and now we are,” Eddie laughs. 
“You came inside me and now there’s a baby in there,” you continue, hearing every syllable of your own voice.
“That’s—” Eddie laughs quietly again. “Yeah, that’s how it works.” 
“I had morning sickness.”
“Yes you did. And mood swings.”
Pause.
“No I didn’t!” you gasp, pulling back from Eddie to look at him with a scowl. 
“You kind of did,” he smiles, dimples set deep in his grin.
“No, I didn’t.”
“You were also insatiably horny. I was getting leg cramps all night because of you,” he says, bopping your nose, making you scrunch it. Asshole.
“I was not ‘insatiably horny,” you scoff, rolling your eyes.
“Well
 if it’s any consolation, if you wanted to have sex again, I could cum in you now, ‘cause you can’t get any more pregnant than you already are,” Eddie says matter-of-factly, purposefully batting his lashes, playing up a faux coyness just to get a rise out of you. Such an asshole.
You respond by hitting him in the stomach, followed by pushing him until he almost falls into the tub, grabbing onto the shower curtain to stop himself. 
“Hey— hey, you were the one asking for it!” he defends, corners of his lips turned up in an untimely smirk. 
“I’m never having sex again,” you shriek, burying your face in your hands. 
“Well, let’s not make drastic choices right now,” he says amusedly, bringing you back in for a hug.
“I’m serious. Never again. Not with you, not with anybody. Ever.” 
“Let’s just get some fresh air, maybe we’ll start thinking straight about this,” he laughs, pulling you to stand up and guiding you out of the bathroom.
Pregnant.
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tags: @princesatracionera @venuslayla23-blog @mastermindmiko @tlclick73 @yujyujj @josephquinnsfreckles @uselessnewt @animechick555 @prestinalove @sluggzillaa @daisyridleyss (if you want to be tagged for the next part I kindly ask that you please reblog!)
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thank you for reading! <3
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deadghosy · 8 months ago
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BEING BEST FRIENDS WITH AANG:
prompt: being the same age as Aang, mostly the avatar has it perks considering you two are polar opposites
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🐚 àŸ€àż“it’s dead ass funny seeing two 12 years argue who sheds more, momo or appa. Katara would have to pull you off of Aang before you slap this little Mr clean head ass boy.
🐚 àŸ€àż“for shits and giggles, you have definitely got launched in the air. You were begging Aang to just launch you in the air. Because you always dreamed of it since you met this airbender.
🐚 àŸ€àż“Aang is pretty much protective of you if you can’t bend. So if you are a non bender, you better believe this boy makes sure you are by his side at all times of the traveling. Even after he finishes the Hundred year war. He’s the avatar, of course there’s still petty ass people after him.
🐚 àŸ€àż“now if you weren’t a non bender and had a bending skill of some sort, he is still protective of you. You could be a master at bending, and this dude will still make sure you are behind him in danger. You two are such a powerful duo when bending, now a good trio is you, toph, and Aang at all once.
🐚 àŸ€àż“you two are basically platonic soulmates who are always found by each other. Like that one time you went to go shopping at a market, and Aang followed you secretly since it’s his job to protect you at all time. Or that one time you lost Aang in the crowd and he immediately found you by your voice in an instant.
🐚 àŸ€àż“â€I’m gonna kill that asshole
” “please don’t.” Those words basically describes your friendship with Aang. Literally after Aang got his grow spurt and he was taller than you, you better believe this now wise boy would put you on his shoulder to drag you away from fights.
🐚 àŸ€àż“you are the chaos in the peace and he is the peace within the chaos. You two are two peas in a pond, yin & yang. You have your moments where it’s the opposite sometimes. But where’s the fun when you create the problems whilst Aang has to drag you away from causing more problems.
🐚 àŸ€àż“smack his head
he dares you. He knows you do it for jokes. But this boy is tired of having red hand marks on his head and feeling the painful burn.. if you did one more time, he is actually putting you in rock time out. You could try to get out. But this airbender is making sure he is having a kick out of this.
🐚 àŸ€àż“when training with Aang, he tries to go easy on while you don’t. Of course you care about Aang deeply like he does for you, but you ain’t no pussy. You literally used chi blocking on him cause he hesitated blasting you away with his airbending. At the end you had to smack his head for trying to not blast you. And of course he still didn’t learn his listen as he just dodges.
🐚 àŸ€àż“Aang is very affectionate person, everyone knows that. So of course he is holding your hand, waist if you allow it, wrap his arm around your shoulder. He might not be that much of a touchy person, but it feels nice to have the person that’s like his other half by him.
🐚 àŸ€àż“cuddles is a must if you or him have a bad day. Yes you once snored while trying to move away from the airbender in your sleep. Aang wasn’t letting that happen at all cause he pulled you to his chest as he falls asleep.
🐚 àŸ€àż“random arguments with Aang is also a must as you two argue over the most stupidest things ever. Say for example, your favorite book was gone. So you accused Aang of using it for something actually dumb. Aang got offended as he dramatically gasp and blamed you instead for being so dense for not keeping up with your stuff. And that’s where you would tackle him and start hitting his head. Mostly smacking his bald head cause it’s funny😭
🐚 àŸ€àż“this sweetheart of an airbender will teach you about his culture. Now if you are part of one of the nations, you teach him your nation of course. It’s like trading PokĂ©mon cards for more PokĂ©mon cards. He will probably do something so you can wear an airbender outfit, just so people can see you two are best friends for life. Literally.
🐚 àŸ€àż“I can see you trying to ignore Aang for something petty, and Aang is not having it as communication is key. He will literally pick you up over his shoulder and put you down so he can talk to you face to face. He’s serious about you, so of course he’s not letting you be this petty.
🐚 àŸ€àż“yk how Aang had his hair grown out, yeah you actually liked it grown out like that. It was cute and you told him that in confidence. At first he thought you were lying so you can make fun of it. But when he saw how you kept playing with his hair. He actually was thinking about keep his hair grown out like this. His darkish brown hair was suiting on him. He’d actually fall asleep with his head on you as you play with it.
🐚 àŸ€àż“Aang will never forget the moment he almost went avatar state for you. All because you wanted to be reckless and almost died. A fire nation soldier tried to burn you alive, but you were quick to dodge it. While for Aang, he didn’t get a clear view to see if you dodged it or not. So this man’s tattoos glowed scared and worried. Mostly angry if you died as he was about to burn the solider. Kyoshi was telling him to. But that all stopped when you grabbed his shoulder. Aang stops to look at you and hug you tightly, his heart went back to normal sped.
🐚 àŸ€àż“to end this off, you guys are practically platonic soulmates who are made to be by each other’s side. Aang agrees and you, you just nod while you stuff your face in food. And Aang eats calmly compared to you. So if you choke on your food, he is smacking the shit out of your back worried if you actually choke on your food.
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m1ckeyb3rry · 2 months ago
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Series Synopsis: A series of (mostly) unrelated one shots, featuring Oliver Aiku somehow getting involved with the love lives of various Blue Lock characters — whether he wants to or not.
Chapter Synopsis: Oliver Aiku isn’t sure which entity he’s wronged to earn this kind of treatment, but somehow, in the days before the match against Blue Lock, he’s stuck watching over the team’s newest addition: Sae Itoshi, a rude midfielder who’d rather be in Spain (or in hell) than hanging out with him. Things get a little more complicated, though, when a cup of shitty coffee leads to a crush and Aiku is forced to intervene.
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Series Masterlist
Pairing: Sae x Reader
Chapter Word Count: 7.9k
Content Warnings: crack fic, sae my awkward goat, love at first sight, oliver aiku is such a bitch but he’s funny so it’s kind of okay, reader has to work in customer service 😓, this is really dumb please don’t judge my writing off of it, sae is 100% ooc don’t come at me i KNOWWW, split perspectives (it makes sense in the story), sae slander (from aiku), reader is a fan girl but she keeps it 𝖓𝖔𝖓𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖑𝖆𝖓𝖙, reader’s dad has cameos but he’s just chilling tbh
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A/N: the people wanted sae’s version to be posted first so uhhh here we are!! LMAO it kind of got a bit long (as usual) but it’s very silly and goofy!! anyways so this is the first entry in “oliver aiku’s guide to getting girls” i hope you all stick around for the rest đŸ€©â€Œïž
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Oliver Aiku likes to think he’s a fairly nice guy. He visits his grandmother every weekend, he rescues kittens from gutters (okay, it only happened once, but he still did it, so it counts), and he’s good enough at being captain of the Japanese U-20s that none of his teammates really hate him, so all in all, he can’t be doing that bad of a job. Yeah, he’s pretty sure he’s a great person, a stand-up fellow, an upstanding member of society — so why the fuck is Sae Itoshi glaring at him like that?
“What?” he says, because it was fine for the first, say, twenty minutes or so, but now it’s gone from annoying to just plain concerning. “Something going on with you?”
Sae stares at him for a moment longer, and Aiku wonders if he’s trying to communicate via telepathy. That’s a skill he’s never picked up, though, so he can only wait for Sae to speak up, which, thankfully, he eventually does.
“This coffee is shit,” he says. The way he speaks is dull and blank, his lips pinched together and his brows low over his eyes. It’s kind of a shame, in Aiku’s highly professional opinion. He’d be handsome if he smiled more; or, if not handsome, at least approachable enough to not scare away every single girl that dared to even glance at him.
“It’s not my fault,” Aiku says. “Take it up with the barista or something.”
“You’re the one who brought me here, so it is your fault,” Sae says. Aiku crosses his arms, because isn’t Sae younger than him? This feels like a level of disrespect he shouldn’t tolerate, prodigy or not.
“Nuh-uh,” he says. In hindsight, it’s not the most mature response he could’ve come up with, and Sae seems to agree, snorting derisively before using a napkin to dab at a drip of coffee running down the side of his cup.
“What a captain,” he says with a sigh. “No wonder you guys need me to play for you against those Blue Lock idiots.”
Aiku should be offended, he really should be — and he is! He is, and he’s just about to muster up some scathing retort that’ll definitely leave Sae Itoshi trembling, but then Sae’s standing up with purpose, so now he’s just intrigued instead of insulted. He follows after him as Sae holds the coffee in one hand and marches towards the counter, and when he realizes what’s about to happen, he preemptively cringes.
“Don’t yell at service workers!” Aiku says. It would’ve been heroic if he had said it loud enough for Sae to hear him, but unfortunately, it’s more of a whisper than the brave shout he had intended for it to be, so he just looks kind of stupid, as if he regularly talks to himself or something.
“Hey,” Sae says to the boy at the counter. He’s young, probably no more than fifteen or sixteen, and Aiku prays that he’s not the target of Sae’s ire. “Who made this?”
The boy squints at Sae’s cup, reading the receipt, and then he smiles innocently. “That was Y/N. Did you want to talk to her?”
“Yes,” Sae says bluntly. Aiku is about to thank whichever deity was watching over him and that boy alike, but he pauses when the rest of the kid’s statement registers. Her? Her? Is Sae seriously about to yell at a girl for making bad coffee? If she’s hot, he’ll kill Sae, no doubt about it. “And tell her to make it quick. We don’t have all day, and she’s already wasted enough of our time.”
Yeah, he’s definitely going to kill him. 
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“Y/N,” a voice whispers. You’re untying your apron — your shift is just about over, and you’re ready to clock out, but for some reason your young coworker is peering into the kitchen nervously and gesturing for you to come with him. Normally, you’d tell him to handle things himself, but he’s new, so you decide to be responsible for once and follow after him, muttering curses to yourself as you retie your apron.
“What’s the matter? Did you spill something?” you say. He shakes his head, raising his hand and pointing at the counter, where two customers are waiting. You frown, because you’re pretty sure you already gave them their drinks, so there’s no reason for them to be standing there, unless maybe they want to reorder. “Wait. Did you call me to take their order? No way! My shift is over in thirty seconds!”
“No, no, I didn’t,” your coworker says. “They want to talk to you.”
“Me? Like me, specifically?” you say. He nods.
“Yeah, they asked for you by name and everything,” he says earnestly. “I think they’re mad, though.”
You pinch the bridge of your nose, because the last thing you want to do is deal with a couple of prissy customers, especially not when you’re supposed to be heading home already. However, your coworker seems to be on the verge of tears, and some kind of sisterly affection tugs at your heartstrings, so you pat him on the shoulder and take his spot at the counter.
“Hi, this is Y/N. My coworker told me you needed to see me. How can I help you?” you say. Your voice is chipper and your smile is false, but they don’t need to know that. You’ve been working at the coffee shop for long enough that you’re practiced at pretending, and you know for a fact that your coworker is standing shyly at your side, probably astonished by the quality of your performance.
For a moment, neither man speaks, so you get to stare at them and make your own assumptions about who they are and what their backstories might be. It’s kind of like a hobby, a pastime for when things are slow or you’re generally annoyed about your job. You’ve developed it over the years, and luckily, these two are prime candidates for the game.
The one on the left is tall and broad, with dark hair and mysterious eyes. Curiously, one is a bright green, while the other is a softer violet, and there’s a few-days-old stubble growing on his square face, like a shadow running along his jaw. It gives him a rough appearance, like he owns a motorcycle and frequently wears leather jackets, but you want to believe that he’s gentle at heart. Maybe he has a fondness for baby animals or he likes to bake cookies or something along those lines.
The one on the right is shorter than his counterpart, and his hair is red like a sunset, pushed carelessly out of his haughty face. He’s wearing a sweater that matches his eyes, though the teal of the knitted fabric is much more muted, and you’re about to come up with some kind of fantastical explanation for who he might be when you realize that you know him.
He clears his throat, and you scramble to stand up straighter, internally screaming, because what are the odds that you’ve somehow managed to piss off the star player of your favorite soccer club’s youth team? You wonder what your father will think of you now. You wonder what you think of yourself now. What should you do? Should you tell him you recognize him? Ask for an autograph? Or should you play it cool and pretend like you don’t know him? What if he yells at you?
Actually, you wouldn’t mind it as much as normally do. When everyday customers start screaming at you for some perceived wrong that you’ve supposedly committed, you typically tune them out, and then you make fun of them with your coworkers in the back, but if it’s Sae Itoshi
well. you’ll certainly listen to every word he says, and when you return to the kitchen, you’ll write them down somewhere so you can remember the moment forever.
“He didn’t like his drink,” he says, pointing at the dark haired man.
“What?” the man shrieks. The pitch is higher than you would’ve expected from someone of his size, but it appears he realizes that, too, because then he’s coughing. “I mean, what? What are you talking about?”
“You were just complaining, Aiku,” Sae says. “You even made me come up here and get mad at this girl for you.”
The other man, who you guess is named Aiku, is turning a strange shade between magenta and beet-red, and you’re surprised there isn’t steam coming out of his ears. Given that you don’t really care about him that much, you’re instantly irritated again, because why would it matter if he didn’t like his drink? Still, you have to keep up appearances.
“My apologies, sir. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?” you say. 
“No!” Aiku says. “No, it’s — hey, Sae, you were the one who was all upset, so why are you putting it on me?”
“Hm?” Sae says, obviously uninterested in the conversation already. “I dunno. Maybe it happened like that, or maybe not.”
“I’m sorry,” you say again, more than a little bewildered. “Ah, I’m new here, so I’m still learning.”
Aiku, who has returned to a more normal and human color, smiles at you kindly, and he’s about to respond, ostensibly to reassure you, but then your damned coworker pipes up: “No, she’s not.”
“Ah, sorry?” Aiku says.
“She’s not new,” your coworker says again.
“‘New’ is a subjective term,” you say mechanically, wishing that it was acceptable for you to turn around and hit him in public whenever you wanted.
“I don’t think anyone would consider you to be new when you’ve been working here for three years,” your coworker says. You can imagine the innocent, guileless expression on his face right now. You want to do something violent to it.
“Ha, ha,” you say. You think your eye might twitch, too, but if Aiku or Sae notice, then neither of them point it out. “What a knowledgeable fellow we have back here.”
“It’s alright,” Aiku says. “I didn’t mind the drink. Sae’s the one who threw a fit about it.”
“I liked it,” Sae says stubbornly. “It was fine.”
You step in before Aiku can turn magenta again, because that’s probably unhealthy for him, and you don’t want to be held liable for a customer dying on your watch when you’re not even being paid for it.
“Anyways, is that all? I’m actually done with my shift, so if you guys don’t need anything else
” you trail off, though inside you’re screaming something along the lines of Sae Itoshi, please notice me and give me your autograph and oh, if you could fall in love with me, too, that would be amazing!
Of course, you can’t verbalize anything like that, so you just smile and wave until the door slams shut behind them. Then you’re yanking your apron off and balling it up before chucking it at your coworker’s face. It hits him in the nose and slides to the ground; he gives you an offended look before picking it up.
“You’re lucky it was only an apron,” you say. “You owe me big time, you little shit.”
“Huh?” he says.
“I won’t forget this!” you warn him, stomping towards the small locker room, where your precious phone is waiting for you. “You’re a major-league jerk, okay? Don’t ever ask me to cover another shift for you again!”
“Huh?” 
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“What the hell was that?” Aiku snaps as soon as they’ve left the cafe, because this is totally not what he was expecting when his coach told him that he had to treat Sae nicely and make him feel welcome. 
“What was what?” Sae says. He’s sipping on his coffee sedately now, even though he was complaining about it only minutes earlier.
“Since when was I the one who was upset about my coffee?” Aiku says.
“I have a bad memory,” Sae deadpans. “I guess it could’ve been either of us.”
“That was not believable in the slightest,” Aiku feels the need to inform him. Judging by Sae’s expression, it wasn’t meant to be believable, though, and Aiku sighs. “Seriously, what’s your deal? You were just going crazy and glaring at me because you thought the coffee sucked, and now you think it’s good?”
“I should’ve waited for it to cool,” Sae says. “It’s better now. I was being hasty.”
“Uh-huh,” Aiku says. “Sure. Let’s do something else tomorrow. I don’t ever want to go back there. I don’t think I can face that girl again. She was so hot, too, and now she probably thinks I’m some ungrateful asshole
”
“I want to go back,” Sae says immediately, throwing the now-empty cup into the nearest trash can. Aiku furrows his brow at him, trying to puzzle out this latest contradiction and finding himself utterly unable to. “Tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow,” Aiku repeats dubiously. Tomorrow he has practice, and technically so does Sae. However, they both know that Sae doesn’t need anything as ridiculous as practice in order to win against a team of eleven high-school forwards, and he’s fairly confident that his coach will tell him to accompany the bratty Itoshi instead of showing up, since the JFU is pulling out all of the stops if it means getting Sae to stay in Japan for good.
“Tomorrow,” Sae reaffirms.
I’m a nice guy, Aiku tries to remind himself. This is what nice guys do. I’m boosting team morale. Yeah. That’s all. Captain’s duties.
Still, as he chases after Sae, who apparently doesn’t know what the word ‘stroll’ means and prefers to do everything at a brisk pace more akin to a jog, he thinks that this entire ridiculous assignment feels more like a babysitter’s duties than anything. 
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“Are you serious?” your father says. In the background, the TV is playing a game between Re Al and Barcha, which is rather fitting.
“Deadly,” you say, untying the laces of your sneakers and putting them with the rest of your shoes. “It was actually him.”
“Sae Itoshi,” he says, shaking his head. “He’s back from Spain?”
“Seems like it,” you say, though now that he mentions it, you’re as confused as he is. Why is Sae Itoshi here instead of Madrid? You glance at the TV — Barcha has just scored, and the cameras are sweeping through the crowds, showing the excited fans cheering — and wonder if maybe he was fired or something. You doubt that that’s what happened; after all, he’s a consistent player, and the last time he was in a match, he even managed to outmaneuver that freaky striker who plays for Bastard MĂŒnchen, so it would make zero sense for Re Al to let him go. Besides, even if they did, you’re sure there’s dozens of clubs that would be willing to take him, so there must be another reason for his presence in Japan.
“Huh,” your father says. “Well. Good for him.” 
“I guess so,” you say. “If I ever see him again, I’ll ask him what he’s doing in town.”
Your father chuckles, taking a sip of his beer and giving you a thumbs up. “Yeah, you do that. Let me know what he says.”
You laugh, too, sitting down at the counter and eating a plate of reheated leftovers, because you know as well as your father that the idea of you ever seeing Sae Itoshi again is more than a little far-fetched. But it’s a nice thought, and anyways the chances are never zero, so for the moment, you allow yourself to imagine. 
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Aiku is seriously questioning if Sae Itoshi was sent to this earth — or at least to this country — as some kind of punishment for him. He’s not really sure what’s done that would invite such cosmic retribution, but maybe it’s one of those
what did that girl call them? Karmic debts? She had said something about the sins of his past life and all, though he can’t recall the specifics.
Wait. That’s wrong. He just never learnt them in the first place, so how could he remember them in the first place? He had broken up with her before she could explain her theories to him. This prompts a wince from him, which is further fueled by the way his t-shirt sticks to his back with sweat. It’s a distinctively uncomfortable feeling, and he’s contemplating complaining, even though it probably won’t do much.
“Shut up,” Sae says.
“I didn’t say anything!” Aiku protests, more than a little spooked, since he actually had been about to say something before Sae had cut him off.
“I can see you making faces at me,” Sae says. Considering Sae is walking ahead of him and to the side, Aiku’s not quite sure how he could tell anything about what sorts of faces Aiku is making, but unfortunately, he’s uncannily correct as always, so Aiku schools his expression into a smooth, neutral one that won’t beget reprimand from his companion.
“I can’t believe you insisted on going here straight after practice,” he says.
“This is the same time we went yesterday,” Sae says. He’s kind of an insufferable smart-ass, Aiku thinks to himself, though he’d never say as much to Sae’s face. After all, unlike his counterpart, he’s considerate like that, and he always has been.
“So? We didn’t have practice yesterday,” Aiku says. “You couldn’t even let me shower?”
“You take forever in the showers,” Sae says. This is rich, for Sae is notoriously obsessive with his skincare, and of the entire team, he takes far and away the longest to get ready. But, then again, Aiku supposes that idiocy is one of those illnesses which spreads further and further until all of one’s perspectives are tainted with the virus.
“I could’ve been quick,” he says. “It would’ve been better if I could’ve at least rinsed off so I didn’t look so gross. I want to impress that Y/N girl if she’s there again today.”
“You’re not her type,” Sae says dismissively. “So why bother?”
“How do you know? Are the two of you childhood buddies or something?” Aiku says. Sae glances at him, and of course he’s way too holier-than-thou to properly sneer, but the corners of his lips turn downwards to the same effect.
“Not too hard to figure out,” he says. 
“Well, hold on just a moment! I got the vibe that she was totally into me yesterday!” Aiku says. He actually did not get any such vibes from the barista; the only thing she seemed into was clocking out, but he’s Oliver Aiku. If he can’t get a girl, he can’t do anything. Besides, it’s not like Sae would be able to tell one way or another — Aiku and his teammate Sendou have a theory that Sae was created in a lab as some kind of experiment to make the world’s best midfielder, because the guy really doesn’t have any knowledge or concern for anything that’s unrelated to soccer.
True to form, Sae blinks unsurely. “Really?”
“Yeah, one hundred percent,” Aiku boasts, although then he’s narrowing his eyes, because such a question is so out of Sae’s character that for a moment, he wonders if there’s been a mistake and he’s actually taken some other team member of his along for this ridiculous errand.
Messy red hair. Teal eyes. Forehead creased with a frown. No, it’s definitely Sae Itoshi, that’s for sure. Just Sae Itoshi in a mood that he’s never seen before. If they were a little closer, he’d ask him what’s the big deal now, but as it is, the question would probably go unappreciated.
“Hm,” Sae says. “Whatever. We’ll see.”
“Sure,” Aiku says slowly, reaching out to hold open the door of the cafe so he can enter behind Sae, since his lovely, amazing, wonderful, kindhearted teammate so generously left it to slam shut in his face. 
What a total dick. He makes a mental note to ask the JFU for a raise, because whatever they’re giving him at the moment is definitely not enough. 
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“They’re back again!” your coworker says. You’re still mad at him for yesterday, so you’ve been giving him the silent treatment the entire shift. It hasn’t gone unnoticed, but his pitiful attempts at reconciliation never include an apology, so you haven’t budged yet.
He waits for you to respond, but you’re pretty sure he’s making stuff up to get you to pay attention to him, and anyways they could be in reference to anyone, so you continue to pour milk into a cup, acting like it’s an all-consuming task which you cannot possibly complete without the utmost of concentration.
“I’m being serious! Y/N, it’s Sae Itoshi and, uh, that other dude!” he says. Your hand wobbles for the briefest moment, but you conclude that he’s most likely lying, so you steady yourself and continue pouring the milk. “Fine, be that way! I’ll serve them myself!”
You can’t even say something snarky in response, because that’ll still be a win on his part, so you huff particularly loudly to no one in particular and leave it at that.
A few minutes later, he’s back, looking so contrite that if you weren’t upset with him, you’d actually be worried. Unfortunately, you very much are upset with him, so you find it on the whole to be rather hilarious and have to suppress a laugh. 
He must take your amusement as a signal to talk, because he speaks eagerly and quickly, stumbling over his words and clasping his hands together in front of him.
“Y/N, Y/N, they’re insisting on seeing you, I told them you’re working right now — I’m sorry, I’m not supposed to do that, right? But I did, and now they really want to see you!” he says.
You’re still not entirely convinced, but if this is an act, then it’s a dedicated one, and you don’t think that he possesses that much dedication in all of his body, so maybe he’s actually telling the truth.
“Fine,” you say. “But if you’re lying, I swear I’m telling our manager to fire you.”
“I’m not!” he squeaks, darting back to the counter, rocking back and forth on his heels as he waits for you to catch up to him.
When you reach the front, you’re surprised to see that it is in fact Sae Itoshi and
whoever that other guy is. Aiku? Yes, that sounds right. It’s Sae and Aiku, and one looks supremely inconvenienced — this would be Sae, of course — while his friend is running a hand through his sweaty hair, flashing you a grin.
You smile back at him, because that’s what you’re trained to do, and you don’t want your coworker to tattle to your manager that you’re not abiding by the cafe’s standards of customer service. Then you stare at them until one of them starts speaking, because that’s what your entire job is, and no matter how badly you want to start gushing to Sae Itoshi about how big of a fan you are, you have to remain professional.
“Is there anything I can do for you two?” you finally say. This prompts Aiku to nod, nudging Sae in the side, which earns him a dark glare.
“I want the number two, and he’ll take the number five,” Aiku says when Sae does not speak up. You want to tell him that nobody orders like that, but you’re not supposed to and it’s really not that big of a deal either way, so you just ring up the order.
“Sounds good. Would you like to pay with cash or credit?” you say.
“Credit,” Sae says, pulling out a card that probably has a monthly spending limit higher than what you make in a year. “And we’re splitting the bill, just so you know.”
What you want to say is Wow, Sae, you’re somehow even cooler in real-life! Who’s your favorite soccer player? What’s your favorite food? Do you like Spain better, or here? What you actually say is: “No problem. I’ll have those right out for you.”
“Thanks,” Aiku says. He’s kind of charming, in a sense; you can think of several friends you have that would probably swoon at the way his smile stretches across his face, but you don’t really see the appeal. Or, maybe you would normally, but at the moment, he’s standing next to Sae Itoshi, so it’s a little hard to focus on him at all.
“Yeah,” Sae says. “Thank you. Y/N.”
He’s probably just reading off of your name tag in an effort to seem more friendly and relatable and humble and all. It’s a classic PR move that he was probably taught as soon as he joined Re Al. You know about it, though, so it shouldn’t work on you. It won’t work on you. He’s just doing what he’s trained to, the same as you are.
It works on you. You run to the back and hide your face in your hands and squeal, because Sae fucking Itoshi just said your name. 
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“Holy fucking shit,” Aiku says.
“Are we just listing curse words now?” Sae says dryly. “Bitch, cunt, hell. There’s three more for you.”
“You like the barista!” Aiku accuses. If Sae was drinking something, he would’ve spit it out just then, but he’s not, so he just chokes on his saliva. 
“No way,” he says.
“Yes, you do! How else can you explain this?” Aiku says, pitching his voice up in an imitation of Sae’s. “Yeah. Thank you. Y/N. Since when do you say thank you to people?”
“Since always? I have manners,” Sae says.
“I’ve never heard you say it,” Aiku says.
“Maybe that’s more telling about you than me,” Sae suggests. Aiku scowls at him.
“You definitely like her,” he says. “No judgment here, man. She’s pretty.”
“Whatever,” Sae says. “Even if I did like her — mind you, I don’t — she’s clearly into you.”
“Me?” Aiku says. “I was just messing with you earlier, you know. Anyways, yeah, I think she’s hot, but, like, you’ve never liked a girl before, right? So I wouldn’t get in the way of that. This is a big step.”
“You’re not getting in the way of anything. Do what you want,” Sae says. 
Aiku’s already pulling out his phone and texting Sendou: big news. Lab experiment just evolved. Feels attraction and jealousy now.
“Uh-huh,” he responds absentmindedly. Sendou texts back with about fifty mind-blown emojis, and he snickers to himself, liking the message.
“Anyways, who told you I’ve never liked anyone before?” Sae says defensively. Aiku just about drops his phone, leaning forwards in interest. Could it be? Are he and Sae actually bonding? Is Sae about to tell him about his first love — who apparently is not this barista?
“I just guessed. Was I wrong?” Aiku says. He’s already trying to come up with who Sae might’ve liked — a childhood neighbor or friend? A women’s soccer player he admired? A girl he saw once in Spain but never again? Oh, that last one is particularly romantic
he’s just about accepted it as fact when Sae glares at him.
“No,” he says. Aiku’s dreams are shattered in an instant, but he can only shake his head while chuckling, both because Sae has inadvertently admitted that he actually does like that Y/N girl, and because he was an idiot for believing that ‘Sae Itoshi’ and ‘romantic’ could ever belong together in one sentence.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” 
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“What do I do?” you say. You and your coworker are back on speaking terms, mostly because you have no one else to talk to and are so desperate that you’re willing to temporarily forgive him. 
“Make their drinks?” he says. You give him a dirty look as you begin mixing up their orders. 
“Not about that. I’m such a huge fan of Sae’s, and this is the second time I’m making a drink for him. It’s kind of like fate, don’t you think? Should I try to talk to him or something?” you say.
“Do you want to?” your coworker says. It’s a slower time of day, so he has nothing to do but sit and watch you — at least, nothing immediate. There’s certainly things he could be doing, but you’re not about to chide him when you’re the reason he’s slacking off.
“Obviously! But what am I supposed to even say? I’ll sound like a creep if I just start acting like a fan-girl!” you say.
“That’s true,” your coworker says. “You kind of sound like one even now
”
“Ugh, if you’re not going to be helpful, then go organize the storeroom or something!”
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“What about her makes you like her?” Aiku presses.
“Are we still on this?” Sae says, as if they’ve been talking about it for hours. “I don’t like her.”
“It’s not like you talked to her for a while
was it really just her looks?” Aiku says. “Damn. Didn’t think you were the shallow type.”
“I am not the shallow type!” Sae says.
“That sounds like something that a shallow person would say,” Aiku teases.
“Shut up,” Sae says. Aiku doesn’t have enough fingers or toes to count how many times Sae’s said that particular phrase to him. Maybe if he counted all of the fingers and all of the toes of every single person in the world, he would get kind of close to what that number might be. “I’m not shallow, I don’t like her, and she’s obviously way more interested in talking to you than me, so get off my back.”
Aiku whistles. “Someone’s jealous.”
“I’m telling the JFU that you were the one who sent me back to Spain,” Sae informs him bluntly. Aiku isn’t sure if that’s a joke or a legitimate threat. It’s hard to tell with Sae sometimes.
“Are you serious?” Aiku says.
“Deadly,” Sae says.
Yep, Aiku decides. He’s serious. 
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“If only that Aiku dude wasn’t there,” you lament, setting the first drink in the pick-up area and calling out Aiku’s name before returning to finish Sae’s drink. “It’d be way easier to talk to Sae without someone there to judge everything I’m saying.”
“Do you think he’d even care?” your coworker says. You shrug.
“No idea. It’s intimidating to talk to guys around their friends, though. You’re a guy yourself, so you wouldn’t get it,” you say.
“Are they even friends?” your coworker says. “Doesn’t seem like they get along that well.”
In unison, the two of you turn so you can look at the duo, who are sitting at a table right within your line of sight. As your coworker said, they don’t look like they’re friends in the slightest. Aiku is sipping on his drink with a smirk, and Sae looks like he’d rather be anywhere else, doing anything else, than be sitting there with his not-friend.
“The point still stands,” you say. 
“Guess so,” your coworker says. Just then, Sae Itoshi happens to glance over, making direct eye contact with you. Your eyebrows raise, and your face warms as you realize you’ve been caught. Aiku turns to follow Sae’s line of sight as you weigh your options. Should you pretend like you weren’t doing anything? Should you wave?
You decide to just smile again before returning to the drink you were supposed to be working on. Your coworker, who saw the entire exchange, cannot stop laughing.
“It’s over for you,” he says. “He definitely thinks you’re a creepy fan-girl now. You can kiss that autograph goodbye.”
“You’re lucky I’m too lazy to remake this drink,” you say. “Because otherwise, I’d spill it on you.”
“That’s against company policy,” he says.
“By accident, of course,” you say with a malicious grin.
“That’s against company policy, too!” 
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“Look, she just smiled at you. I bet she was looking at you the entire time,” Sae says coolly. “You should ask for her number. You already said you think she’s beautiful.”
“I said she’s hot. I’m not all poetic and shit like that,” Aiku says. “And I wouldn’t do that. It’s against the bro code.”
“We’re not ‘bros’, so you can put that out of your head,” Sae says.
“What if I help you get her number?” Aiku says. Sae tries very hard to maintain his nonchalant look, but Aiku can tell that his curiosity has been piqued. “Will you consider me a bro then? At the minimum, will you tell the JFU that I’ve done a great job at showing you around and making you feel welcome?”
Please please please please please I really need a fucking raise Sae I’m broke please please please — 
“Sure,” Sae says.
“Sure?” Aiku says. “Yes! Okay, this will be easy.”
Sae scoffs. “Yeah, okay. If that’s what you think.”
“Believe me,” Aiku says. “You’re in the presence of a master.”
Sae doesn’t even dignify that with a response beyond the most disgusted look Aiku has ever seen on anyone, Sae or not. He’d say something, but he’s pretty sure he deserves it at least a little, and anyways a possible raise is way more important to him than being right, so he keeps his mouth shut, simply giving Sae a double-thumbs-up. He’s going to ace this new assignment, and then maybe he’ll actually be paid what he’s worth instead of pennies on the dime.
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You’re about to call out Sae’s name when you realize that for some reason, both Aiku and Sae are standing there and waiting for you. You furrow your brow, because it’s both a menacing and a comical sight — the hulking Aiku, who looks like he’s about to go punch a criminal on television before flipping his hair and telling the ladies that there’s enough of him to go around, and the slender Sae Itoshi, who you can’t imagine doing anything but slamming a winning pass to one of his teammates, invariably leading to a soccer ball in his opponent’s net.
“Uh, hello,” you say.
“Hello,” Aiku says.
“Hi,” Sae says.
“I have your drink,” you say to Sae.
“I know,” he says, taking it from your hand. Of course — why else would they be here? They must’ve seen you finishing up the drink and rightly assumed that it was theirs.
“Right,” you say. Neither of them go to leave, and now you wonder if they just don’t understand social cues or something like that. “Did you guys want to order something else? My coworker would be happy to take you at the counter.”
“No,” Sae says.
“Okay,” you say slowly. “Well, I hope you enjoy your drinks.”
“We will,” Sae says with the utmost of confidence. Aiku groans and then thumps him on the back. You have a feeling you probably don’t want to know what the significance of the gesture is, but then you realize that this is probably the only chance you’ll get to have a proper conversation with Sae Itoshi, so you shove your concerns aside.
“Wait! If it doesn’t bother you too much, can I ask you a question?” you say. It’s an incredibly awkward way of going about it, but given how awkward this entire interaction has been, you don’t think it’s a huge deal. 
“Go ahead,” Aiku says. You weren’t asking him, but you guess the permission covers them both, so you square your shoulders and face Sae Itoshi, who seems entirely confused that you’re looking at him instead of Aiku. You’re not sure why he would be, since between the two of them he’s the celebrity, but maybe there’s some weird dynamic going on that you’re unaware of.
It doesn’t matter to you, though. You only have one thing to ask. You’ll never cross paths with Sae again, will you? So it’s fine. You can act a little embarrassing, and anyways, you barely make above minimum wage, so if your manager gets too upset and fires you for ‘unprofessional conduct’ or something, it won’t be a huge loss. It’ll be worth it, even, considering this is a once-in-a-lifetime chance and your coworker is busy reorganizing the storeroom like you told him to, so he’s not around to spy on you and report back to your stodgy old manager.
Taking a deep breath, you open your mouth and begin to speak. 
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Aiku hadn’t dared to even dream of the possibility that the barista might already like Sae, too. Why would she? Sae had just been all weird and rude to her in the couple of times that they had spoken, so all in all she’d have to be somewhat of a masochist, or a Re Al fan (which was essentially the same thing, given the losing streak that Re Al had been on for the last month or so), to be into him. But sometimes miracles did happen and baristas were masochists, because the girl was turning to Sae with shimmering eyes and a hopeful expression and it was all going to go so well—
“What are you even doing in Japan in the first place?”
Did he hear her right? Sae is bewildered as well, but Y/N isn’t acting like she’s just asked the most ridiculous question she could’ve possibly asked. What is Sae doing in Japan? Well, he happens to be a citizen of the nation, so there’s one explanation
Aiku wants to facepalm, because now his plans have been ruined and Sae’s confidence has probably been crushed.
“Pardon?” Sae says. Aiku had told him not to act so cranky and old-man-ish when he approaches the girl, but honestly, at this point, there’s no helping him, so he doesn’t even bother with a correction.
“Why are you in Japan?” she says again, all bright and innocent and cheery. It somehow feels like she’s been faking things so far, and that this is the real her, which she’s been holding back up until this point. Aiku isn’t so sure if that’s a good thing; privately, he believes it would’ve been better if she kept holding back just a little bit longer. Long enough for her to reject Sae — who still claims he’s not into her and is just trying to ‘be friendly’, as if friendliness is something he’s well known for — and then move on with her day.
“My passport expired?” Sae says, phrasing it more like a question. “So I had to come back and get it renewed?”
His voice ticks up at the end of every sentence unsurely. It’s almost cute, like he’s a little baby chick. Aiku’s fond of chicks, so he decides he’ll step in. Just this once.
“He’s visiting from Spain to play for the Japanese U-20 team in an upcoming exhibition match,” he explains.
“Oh, wow,” she says. “But I thought you said you would rather give up on soccer or play with German college kids than ever play soccer for Japan?”
Aiku raises an eyebrow. He wasn’t aware of such sentiments, and though he’s not exactly shocked, he can’t help feeling a bit miffed. When he glances over at Sae, there’s not a trace of remorse on his face, and so he wrinkles his nose.
Forget the raise and the baby-chick-esque mannerisms alike. He’s done helping this ungrateful, no-good, lame-as-hell, girl-repelling loser for free. If Sae wants any further assistance, he’ll have to beg for it. 
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“How did you know I said that?” Sae says. You clap your hand over your mouth when you realize you’ve exposed yourself.
“I, um, I was just guessing!” you say.
“Guessing?” he repeats. You swear, because that’s actually a worse explanation than the original one, and then you hang your head, because if the cat’s out of the bag, then there’s no way you can put it back in.
“It’s a quote from one of your interviews,” you mumble.
“What?” It’s Aiku, who immediately frowns when he realizes he’s butted in. Sae gives him an odd look out of the corner of his eye.
“I’m a big fan of yours,” you say. “The last game you played in, when you stole the ball from that Bastard MĂŒnchen striker, was amazing! To tell you the truth, I’ve been trying to figure out why you’re in the area instead of back in Madrid. It’s a little unbelievable, you see.”
“Ah,” Sae says, and for some reason he looks uncomfortable. “Well. Yeah. It was just the issues with my passport and all. I decided to play for the U-20s because I was offered a good deal, but it’s right back to Madrid for me after that.”
“That makes sense,” you say. It’s awkward again, but in a different way. You don’t know what to say. You don’t think he does either. His drink is probably cold now, and you’re surprised that Aiku’s eyes aren’t stuck in the back of his head, given how frequently he’s been rolling them. “Can I have your autograph?”
“No,” Sae says immediately. You’re a little taken aback, and to be honest, he looks kind of horrified himself, but you know better than to nag, so you only nod at him.
“No worries—” you begin before you’re cut off by a grumbling Aiku.
“He’ll give you his number instead. Here,” Aiku says, listing off a series of digits too rapidly for you to remember. “He’ll write it down, for you, right, Sae?”
And then, to your utter disbelief, Sae Itoshi is pulling out a pen and a piece of paper from who knows where, and he’s humming in agreement.
“Right,” he says, and then he’s handing you a note with his phone number written on it in neat print and his signature in flowing cursive. “You can call me later. If you want. Y/N.”
The way he speaks is stilted and low, but you don’t mind it. Tucking the piece of paper into your apron pocket, you beam at him.
“Alright,” you say. “I’ll call you. I still have more things to ask you, so it’s good that you gave me this.”
“Yes,” Sae says. “Yes, you can do that if you’d like.”
Then he and Aiku are leaving the coffee shop, their drinks in hand, and you’re standing there in awe, wondering if that actually just happened or if it was nothing but a particularly vivid flight of fancy. 
If it’s the latter, then you almost hope it’s one you don’t ever escape from. 
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“You’re welcome,” Aiku says as they leave the cafe. 
“I didn’t say thank you, you lukewarm oaf,” Sae says. Aiku shrugs. He’s hard to ruffle, after all. It’s the reason why he stepped in and rescued Sae from that little mistake of his. He just couldn’t bear the thought of his dear junior losing the girl of his dreams because of a slip of his tongue, even if aforementioned junior is the insufferable smart-ass type.
Well, the thought of the money he’ll make if Sae speaks of him highly to the JFU doesn’t hurt, either, but that’s less altruistic, so he prefers to stick to the first explanation.
“I bet you feel it, though,” Aiku says.
“Shut up,” Sae says. 
It’s a good thing babies are born every minute. Otherwise, given how frequently Sae says that particular phrase, Aiku really might run out of things to count on. 
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You’ve typed the number on the piece of paper into your phone, and now you’re staring at it blankly, wondering if you should press the green call button. What if it was a prank? What if it wasn’t? Because then you’ll have to actually talk to Sae Itoshi, and you’re not so sure you can do that.
In a fit of inspiration, you slam your index finger against your screen and hold your phone up to your ear. It rings a couple of times, each subsequent one worsening the pit in your stomach, but then it stops ringing entirely, which can only mean one thing: Sae, if this really is his number, has answered.
“Hello?” you say.
“Hello?” he responds. “Y/N?”
“Yes!” you say. “It’s me. Y/N. Like you said.”
“Cool,” he says. “It’s Sae. Which I guess you knew, since you called me.”
“The confirmation was nice,” you say, internally sighing in relief. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome,” he says. It’s mannerly but also a little sarcastic, albeit not in a mean way. You don’t mind it much. “You said you had to ask me some things?”
The two of you spend the next few minutes in a setting kind of like an interview, in that you drill him with questions and he answers them all patiently. He’s kind about it, humoring you even though he doesn’t have to, and he never threatens to hang up, which you do appreciate.
“Would you mind if I ask a question, too?” he says when you’ve taken a break to drink some water.
“Go ahead! Although I’m not as interesting as you are,” you say.
“I think you’re probably way more interesting,” he admits. “Anyways. Are you free next weekend?”
“Uh, I think I have a shift on Saturday, but to be honest, my coworker owes me, so he can cover it. Why?” you say.
“The exhibition game that I’m playing with the U-20s for. You should come watch,” he says.
“Oh! Sure, where should I get tickets? I’d have gotten them already if I knew you were playing,” you say.
“I’m allowed to invite someone,” he says. “Friends or family. So I’m inviting you.”
“Don’t you have actual friends that you can invite?” you say before gasping. “Sorry! Sorry, that was super insensitive and rude of me. Of course I’m honored to come, I’m just confused about why I’m the one you’re inviting. Me. I’ve literally made coffee for you twice, and that’s about it.”
“Yeah, that’s true,” he says before pausing. “Um, look, Aiku told me to say this, so if it’s uncomfortable, then blame him
but I think you’re, er, beautiful?”
Your mind short-circuits. “Huh?”
“I don’t know! He’s the one who has experience, I’m just taking his advice!” Sae says, his tone souring immediately afterwards. “Trust me, it’s not like I want to. There’s many things I’d rather do than follow Oliver Aiku’s advice, but at the moment, it’s the best I can do.”
“Beautiful,” you repeat. It’s such an elegant adjective. You’ve been called pretty before, and there’s been a fair share of guys who have considered you to be hot, but beautiful
it’s nice. It’s really nice.
“Yeah,” Sae finally says. “Basically.”
“I’ll be there,” you say. There’s something like a scream bubbling in your throat, but you fight it back, knowing that it’s of the utmost importance that you maintain a relaxed demeanor.
“Great,” Sae says. “See you.”
“See you,” you say, and then you hang up before he can say anything further, because you’re already on the verge of combustion and you don’t think you can handle anything more.
Throwing your phone across the room, you give in and scream. There’s thundering footsteps, and then your father is throwing the door to your bedroom open, whipping his head around wildly.
“Is everything alright? Why are you screaming?” he says, heaving for breath, probably because he just sprinted from his spot on the couch to your bedroom in record time.
“Sae Itoshi!” you say.
“Yes?” he says, the rate of his inhales and exhales lowering as he realizes there’s no active threat to your life or property. “What about him?”
“He told me I’m beautiful and invited me to watch his game next weekend,” you say, knowing that this is going to make your father — a fellow Re Al fan — freak out.
You wait, counting down as he processes the news, unable to contain your exuberant grin, knowing exactly what’s coming. Three, two, one—
“What?”
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icejjfishesz · 9 months ago
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ꗃ dating paige...
she’d never admit to it...but she is clingy as fuck!! the only way i can rly describe it is indelibly tactile.
she kisses you all the time (holds your face tenderly afterwards, rubbing circles on your cheeks while she smiles at you), her head lives in the crook of your neck istg, kisses your tears away when u cry :/, her hands are forever interlocked with yours (or on/in between your thighs to "keep them warm"), will stand behind you and rest her chin on your shoulder, uses you as personal pillow and will lay on your (lap, stomach, ass), has fallen asleep on you too many times to count. 
can’t sleep without you
so if you aren’t already in bed by the time she goes to sleep she will drag you away from anything you’re doing to bring you to bed + if you wake up before (which you do like 60% of the time) she will not let you go until she’s awake (literally has a death grip). whines like a baby if you stop cuddling her
temperamental but hates arguing with you
it happens mainly over little shit cause she has kind of a quick temper but the love is always there. might say smth dumb she'll regret later but she'll make up for it later.
possessive idk
makes you wear her clothes (especially getting you to wear her jersey to games đŸ˜©đŸ˜©). gets jealous so easily because you’re the object of her every affection and to her you are absolutely perfect, she thinks everyone else will think the same. gets you a necklace with the letter "p" on it for valentines and probably gets herself a necklace with your initial on it at the same time.
casual intimacy is her thingg đŸ˜©
showers/bathes with you any chance she gets (defo gets offended if you shower without her). will pout like a child (she's dramatic like that) if she comes home and sees you showered without her.
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