#getting my nails done is one of the ways i treat myself

[llama--plumbobsims]

I'm getting my nails done tomorrow and I'm so excited

[rememberwren]

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Easy breezy beautiful premature ejaculation. Hypersexual!Simon/fem!reader. Discussion of edging. Cumming untouched.

-

“If we do this,” he says around his cigarette, “then we do it my way.”

“I’ve never done this before,” you admit cautiously, turning your hands palm up as if to show you have no weapons, no tricks up your sleeve. I’m innocuous, your posture says. His own says: I’m still deciding, with his tense shoulders and narrowed eyes. “This weird, femdom thing. So I appreciate your guidance. Because I know fuck all—“

“You’re no femdom—Jesus, fuck, I can’t talk about it anymore,” he grits out. He takes a step back and away, creating distance, exhaling a plume of smoke that makes him look strangely ethereal in the evening light. Against your will, your eyes flicker down to just below his belt buckle and oh god. He’s hard. 

“Just from talking about it?”

The look he gives you could melt ice. It could sublimate it. You cringe, knowing you were in the wrong, wishing you could reach out and snatch the words right out of the air. He’s trusting you with this. The last thing he needs is to feel like a joke. 

“I’m sorry,” you say. “I shouldn’t have—you’re not a, a science experiment or something—“

“Wouldn’t mind that so much. Might figure out what the fuck’s wrong with me. Less interested in being treated like I’m part of a circus troupe,” he grumbles. He drops the cigarette and grinds it to ash beneath his boot. He asks: “Inside?” 

-

Gingerly, so gingerly, he undoes the button of his jeans and unzips them. He holds his breath as he works the denim down his thick thighs. God, is he built: muscles made for more than just show. His history is inscribed on his body in its strength and in its scars, scars of white and pale pinks that darken to purple in the lamplight. He’s wearing boxer briefs, straining at the front from his erection, and they are soaked. You’re surprised that he hasn’t soaked straight through to his jeans. 

“Don’t look,” he grits out through his teeth. You look away, unsure where to cast your eyes to, and settle for shutting them. He explains: “Can’t take the way you’re looking at me.”

“Sorry,” you mutter, feeling your face flush hot. 

“Just—let me—” you hear the sound of fabric rustling. He kicks off his jeans—you can tell by the soft sound of them landing against the floor off the side of the bed. “Fuck. Fuck, fuck.” 

“What’s wrong?” you ask, eyes squeezed shut, hands clenching in your lap. 

“Nothing just—fuck. No way I’m going to last.” He sounds bitterly disappointed. 

“That’s the point of this, right? To get better at lasting?” 

He sighs, a long-suffering sound, like this discussion is well worn and frustrating to him. Something in you shrivels, and it takes your body with it as best as it can, sending your shoulders hunching inwards, your head ducking down. You pick at one of your nails by feel alone, eyes still closed, and nearly jump when his fingers brush your knee. 

“Sorry,” he mutters. “You’re right. That’s what this is for. Might as well get used to embarrassing myself.” 

“That’s the spirit." 

He snorts. More fabric rustles, and at length he says: “Alright. You can look. Just…you can look.” 

You open your eyes hesitantly. His cock is right there—and Jesus. It makes sense, proportionally, but it is frightening in a very real sense. You’re already doing the math, measuring in your head and comparing to your past precedents. Ghost would have them all beat, quite comfortably, in length and girth. He’s cut, which surprises you, but isn’t a turnoff. He keeps himself landscaped nicely, which you appreciate, even if it isn’t necessary. 

He is flushed a ruddy pink, the head darker than the rest. As you stare, it jerks, a bead of precum welling at the tip. Suddenly one of his large, scarred hands reaches down and grips the base of his cock in a painful hold, hissing in a breath through his teeth. 

“Can’t look at me like that,” he admonishes again. 

“Like what?” you ask, a little defensive. You’re just looking! You have to look, right? 

“Like you want it,” he mutters. 

God, does he really have no idea? No inkling of how badly you want to sit on that monster in his hands? No notion of how wet you’ve been since your conversation in the parking lot? Sure you aren't like him, not about to spring off if the breeze was just right, but you are anything but unaffected. Still, it seems like the wrong moment to educate him on your attraction to him and his cock, so you do your best to morph your expression into one of unimpressed ambivalence and hoped it helps. 

“I’m ready when you are,” you say, interrupting his deep breathing exercises. He nods but doesn’t give you the go-ahead, not for another minute or two, until his chest stops heaving and he can remove his hand from the vice grip he has around his balls. His cock has a near purple tinge, and you wonder if maybe he should have rubbed one out in the bathroom beforehand just to take the edge off. Oh well, it’s a thought for next time. 

“Go ahead,” he says, like he’s giving you permission to pull the trigger on him during a game of Russian Roulette. 

You reach out—his cock twitches, a nice warm welcome if you’ve ever seen one, but you hesitate. Your hand is dry. Should you ask for lube? How does he usually jerk off? Dry? You have a feeling he doesn’t mind the discomfort; he seems like he has a self-destructive streak a mile wide. His eyes are fixed at a point on the ceiling, his chest unmoving as he holds his breath. You decide that some sort of lubrication is better than none—so you lick a broad stripe up your palm. 

“Fuck,” he whispers, a little punched-out sound. Sometime between opening your mouth and licking your palm, his eyes had transferred from the ceiling to your face, to the flash of your tongue and your wet palm. His eyes widen, irises swallowed up by the pupils, and he says again, more urgently: “Oh fuck.” 

He reaches down to grip the base of his cock again, but it is too late: he cums. His abs are thrown into sharp relief as he tenses with each pulse, cock jerking against his brutal grip. He doesn’t even jerk himself off—just ruins it as you stare with your mouth open and your hand wet, watching him splatter seed against the coarse line of hair that runs from his belly button to his cock all because he watched you lick your hand. 

“Fuuuuuuck,” he groans, throwing one arm across his eyes, breathing heavily. His mouth is flushed a pretty red, like he has been kissing. His hand clenches into a fist as he says: “I’m sorry. I tried not to.” 

“It’s okay,” you say, your nearly brain blue-screening from how turned on you are. You lower your hand and wipe it dry on your leggings. “That’s what this practice is for—so you don’t do it when it really counts. We can try again tomorrow or something.” 

He snorts. “Tomorrow? Give me five fucking minutes.” 

[iamgonnagetyouback]

𝟷𝚔 || 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇 𝐌𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄

♡ ︎ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: You were high maintenance and Mattheo loved maintaining you; but only on one condition.

♡ ︎ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: None

♡ ︎ꜱʜɪᴘ: Mattheo Riddle x Reader

Mattheo Riddle is completely infatuated with you, his high-maintenance girlfriend who has him wrapped around her perfectly manicured finger. You live for pink, makeup, long nails, and every glamorous touch, and Mattheo? He adores it. The upkeep, the attention, the endless pampering—he loves treating you like the princess you are. He proudly carries your bags, ensures your makeup is perfectly stocked, and always knows exactly when it's time for a nail appointment.

But there's one rule. Mattheo's just as high maintenance in his own way, only in the form of your undivided attention and affection. The moment you stop pampering him—whether that’s running your fingers through his hair, spoiling him with sweet words, or letting him cling to you like a koala—he turns into the neediest boyfriend alive.

One morning, you’re sitting in front of your vanity, carefully applying lip gloss when Mattheo saunters in, his eyes immediately locking on you. His face falls slightly when you don’t greet him with your usual kiss.

“Why aren’t you paying attention to me?” he whines, crossing the room in two strides and resting his chin on your shoulder. “I’ve been waiting for my turn for ages.”

You laugh softly, twisting in your chair to face him. “Mattheo, I’m just doing my makeup. I’ll give you attention in a sec.”

But that doesn’t fly with him. Before you can finish, he’s scooping you up from the chair, plopping down on the bed with you tucked in his arms. He nuzzles his face into your neck, a dramatic sigh escaping his lips. “I don’t care about your makeup. I care about you.”

You grin, brushing a hand through his messy curls. “You’re being dramatic. And you act like I don’t give you enough attention, Matt."

"Because you don’t," he pouted dramatically. "You can’t just look this good and not let me have you all to myself. It's unfair."

You giggled and kissed his cheek, leaving a faint pink lipstick stain. "I’m almost done. What, you miss me already?"

"I always miss you," he mumbled.

“I need my pampering too,” he murmurs, holding you tighter. “I can’t function without it.”

You know his antics, but it’s still the cutest thing in the world. You lean down and place a soft kiss on his cheek. “Poor baby, did I neglect you?”

He nods, lips pouting in full force. “So much. I don’t know how I’m even surviving.”

You giggle, but comply immediately, peppering kisses across his face until he’s smiling lazily. “Better?”

“Almost,” he mumbles, pulling you even closer. “Don’t leave me.”

"I’m just going to meet up with some friends, Matt," you giggled, running your nails lightly through his hair. "I won’t be gone long."

He lifted his head, giving you a pout that was far too cute for someone who looked as dangerous as he did. "I don’t care. I’m coming with you."

You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t deny how much you loved his clinginess. He always wanted to be near you, touching you, even when you were doing something as simple as getting ready. It was endearing, the way he never wanted to be without you.

"Fine," you said, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "But only if you promise to behave."

"No promises," he grinned, holding you tighter. "But you’re stuck with me, princess."

And honestly, you wouldn’t have it any other way.

[exhaslo]

Over-Time Ch4

(CEO!Miguel x Shy/Clumsy!Reader)

Ch1, Ch2, Ch3

Warning: MINORS DNI, eventual smut, slow-burn, mentions of sex, bullying, cussing, fluff

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

"This is the big bad CEO's office," Lyla said with a wide smile as she stood proudly in front of the large set of doors.

Your eyes could only widen as you thought of the man behind those doors. Such a powerful person was able to make Alchemax what it was. This was going to be your future boss. As nervous as you were, you had to make a good first impression!

"Stop scaring the new girl,"

Your ears perked up as you recognized the voice. Your breathing nearly halted as the doors began to open, revealing Miguel.

"Huh? Miguel? Y-You're...You're the C-CEO?"

Your heart stilled for a moment as you recalled everything you had done. Your clumsiness for bumping into the CEO on your interview day, chatting with him so casually in the elevator and showing every form of weakness possible.

As you heart started to gain pace, your chest swelled with regret. It was difficult, but you held back your tears. Noticing the treat on his desk, you immediately bowed your head,

"I-I'm so...so sorry! I-I-"

"There is no need to apologize. It is I who should give my apologies. I was the one who deceived you." Miguel said with a smile.

"Ew, your smiling." Lyla muttered.

As Miguel bickered lowly with Lyla, you still felt your head spinning a mile a minute.

"Anyway-" Miguel gently shoved Lyla to the side, "I was more so enjoying the presence of someone who did not know who I was, which led me to fooling you. For that, I apologize."

"Ah-" You gasped, finally letting yourself breathe, "S-So...was I hired...because of...of my skill or-"

"Duuuuuh, girl. This guy doesn't know the meaning of special treatment. He's just a big oaf." Lyla pitched in with a smug eating grin. Miguel could only grumble to her response,

"Please ignore her statements about me. I look forward to working with you from now on. As you know, Lyla will be going on vacation very soon. During this time she will guide you on everything you will have to do. That is, if you are still willing-"

"Yes! Yes I am!" You nearly shouted before covering your mouth, "S-Sorry, I am. I really want to better...myself and you have given me this um, opportunity."

Glancing up at Miguel, you felt butterflies in your stomach as he smiled towards you.

"I'm glad to hear that." His voice was still so gentle, "Well, I have a meeting I must get ready for. Why don't you take the rest of the day off and we will see you tomorrow, yes?"

"Y-Yes!"

-----------

Miguel was the CEO. Miguel was the CEO. MIGUEL WAS THE CEO OF ALCHEMAX! AND I MADE A FOOL OF MYSELF!

The thoughts raged through your mind as you quietly sat on the bus on your way home. Biting your nail, you tried to calm down, but it was no use. Despite Miguel being so kind to you, you still couldn't stop from recalling your foolishness.

You had to make it up to him.

You HAD too.

------------

"Why are you being so nice?" Lyla asked once the two entered Miguel's office.

"Am I not human?" Miguel said with a snort, "Is it so wrong of me to treat another with kindness? I am surrounded by selfish fools and greedy bastards every second of the day. It is nice to have a change."

"Yeah, but I really don't want to see her bend over on your desk crying your name out when I come back."

"Lyla!" Miguel felt his cheeks burn, "You know me better than that."

"I do. Which is why I'm totally predicting a few outcomes."

"You have little faith in me,"

Miguel sat at his desk and let out a heavy sigh. As nice as he may have seemed to you, Lyla was not wrong. As a man, Miguel already had a thought, though for a mere second, of you under him. The face you might make when he shoved his dick inside those walls of yours.

"You're totally thinking about it now, gross." Lyla chuckled, "You're lucky she's a quiet one, but....that's also a problem."

Clearing his throat, Miguel rid himself of those naughty thoughts as he listened to Lyla.

"I know. (Y/n) will get eaten alive by my business partners. I'm sure you can find a way to boost her confidence in this short amount of time."

"Against those horny old bastards? Duh," Lyla hummed before plopping herself against Miguel's couch, "It's her I'm more worried about."

"She hasn't-"

"Every women who tries to enter your life has fled because of her. You're lucky I have the biggest pair of balls in his city to even stand a chance against that snake."

"I recall...I wonder if she still has your bite marks-"

"Bitch better! They were sharp and clean from my dental appointment!" Lyla huffed before fixing her hair, "But even so, not even I am capable of preparing someone against her. I fear that your new assistant will be eaten alive."

"Then I'll be the only one of us to have faith in (Y/n)."

"Hm,"

-----------

Miguel inhaled deeply as he stood against his balcony, enjoying the quiet night. It felt strange to not be so stressed out after a long day of work. Taking a sip of his drink, Miguel couldn't help but recall your expression from earlier.

You looked like a deer caught in headlights once Miguel revealed himself. Your face turned bright red and your words fumbling with each other. It was cute. Miguel assumed that you were overthinking and panicked.

But, he still had faith in you. You hadn't made any sort of move to try and win him over yet. Most tend to try and meet with Miguel after hours. Instead, you sent another apology email for your actions and for the salty snack.

"How has such a little mouse survived this long? In this city of predators like myself?"

Humming to the thought, Miguel also recalled that 'snake' that Lyla brought up. All Miguel had to do was hide your existence for the next few months and you'll be fine.

"Hm, but will she be fine against me?"

---------

It was day two of you officially working at Alchemax. Lyla was going to show you the ropes.

However, you had to get Miguel's morning coffee.

"Miguel turns into such a grumpy beast when he doesn't have his coffee. I've already memorized his order, but I wrote it down for you along with the place we get it from. I also put my order on there, and feel free to get yourself something."

"A-Are you sure? This is the company card." You stuttered, feeling a little nervous about a simple coffee run.

"It's Miguel's card and he doesn't mind. Once we've all had our energy, I'll start showing you the first morning tasks."

"Okay,"

You tried to stop shaking as you put the card and paper in your wallet. Hurrying downstairs, you tried to calm down. This was your first unofficial task for Miguel. A simple coffee run. How bad could it really be?

------

You shuddered as you stood in front of your old job. Your hands trembling as you held the piece of paper in your hand. You hardly worked this early in the morning, so it would make sense why you never thought of Alchemax workers getting their coffee from here.

Hell, you hardly even noticed how close the two jobs were to one another.

Inhaling deeply, you made your way inside. Sweat rolled down your neck as you saw your old co-workers in the middle of a rush. Each of them yelling out orders and ingredients. As long as they stayed busy and didn't notice you, it would be fine.

"Wel-Oh! (Y/n)! Nice of you to join us."

And there was the hostility.

"What?! She's here?! After she didn't show up for my shift yesterday?!"

"....I....quit...." You whispered, trying to hide behind the line of people waiting for their order.

"Well since you're here, clock in and help us."

"I....can't," You tried to say.

Didn't your manager tell everyone that you quit? You made sure to call them last night to inform them that you weren't going to work there anymore. You quit this toxic job for Alchemax. So why, why is everyone still so harsh?

"(Y/N)! We need the help!" Another coworker yelled out.

You were shaking as everyone started to stare at you. The paper in your hand starting to crumble as you shook. They didn't need your help. You were just going to make a mess with how busy it was. They just wanted to yell at you.

"I-I can't! I'm just here for my new job!" You nearly cried out.

"Tch, what a liar."

And there it was. You lowered your head as the line kept moving. The stares you were getting were intense. Everyone probably thought that you were an asshole. As you waited, you felt your phone buzz.

"H-Hello?" You stuttered.

"Ah! (Y/N)! I hope it isn't too late, could you-"

"(Y/N)! I heard from the others that you refuse to help, especially after not showing up yesterday. We need to have a word in my office." Your morning manager hissed.

"B-But...I-I-"

"It seems busy. I'll text you the item." Lyla said before hanging up.

Oh, how you wanted to cry. What were you to do? You could never stand up to the managers. Why didn't the night manager inform everyone that you quit?

"To. My. Office."

"What seems to be the problem?"

Your breathing hitched as you turned to find Miguel. You couldn't hold back the tears as Miguel placed his hand against your shoulder. It was amazing. Everyone immediately froze as they stared at your new boss. Were you the only one who didn't know that he was the CEO?

"You're-" Your manager snapped out of his shocked state, "I was just going to handle my associate about her teamwork and customer service."

"Your associate?" Miguel scoffed, "From my understanding and resources, she quit your establishment last night. (Y/n) works for me now. If this shop doesn't wish to treat my associates fairly, then Alchemax will gladly take our business elsewhere." Miguel said firmly, motioning you to follow him out.

"I'm sorry, sir! We weren't aware that she quit. Please, allow us to make you your drink on the house-"

"We don't need your charity. Instead, apologize to her."

"S-Sir, I...I really-"

"Don't let them talk down to you as if you're nothing," Miguel whispered in your ear, "You deserve to be treated fairly."

As if something was stuck in your throat, you could only nod towards Miguel. Glancing towards your old manager, you waited for his forced apology. You still didn't like the stares. You knew that you could never come back here after this.

It took a minute, but your old manager finally apologized. Miguel just smirked before walking you out of the shop. Finally feeling like you could breathe, you turned to face Miguel once you were a good distance away.

"I-I'm sorry for causing t-trouble...B-But...How did you know I-I was there?" You asked with a stutter. Miguel removed his hand from your shoulder,

"I normally come in a little late to give Lyla her 'beauty time' as I call it. It also gives her time to get my morning coffee without having to rush. I tend to take this route every now and then and couldn't help but notice you in the café."

"I'm sorry I'm being a burden already," Frowning as you lowered your head, you stared at the crumbled paper in your hand, "I couldn't even get this right-"

"Don't cry," Miguel hushed, lifting your chin, "You can't blame yourself for the foolish acts of others."

"I'm sorry," You whimpered once more. Miguel just let out a soft sigh, wiping a tear away,

"Come. I don't have a meeting for another hour or so. Why don't we spend some time looking for a new coffee shop? I wouldn't want you going back to that hostile place."

Watching Miguel hold his arm out, you sniffed as you calmed down. Lyla said that Miguel was a beast without his coffee, but he was still ever so kind to you. Taking his arm, you gladly took Miguel's offer as you spent some time getting to know your new boss.

---------

Lyla pouted as she sat in her office, staring at the clock.

"Where the hell is my coffee?"

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Next Chapter

@timidquindim @decentsoupperson @ivkygirly @reader-1290 @daddyfroglegs @eepybunny0805 @ddreabea @iamperson12280 @migueloharasoulmate @tojishugetiddies @koko-1025 @hyeinwluv85s @daisy-artfield @migueloharastruelove @a-lil-whore @hcqwxrtss123 @the-pan-liquid @tojisfav @pochapo @bubblegumfanfictions @brighterthanlonelythoughts @ghstypaint @mangoslushcrush @synamonthy @scaleniusrm @moonspectorx @dorck26 @a060403 @lunablackcosplay @soraya-daydreams @lovefanfic1 @mymrsweirdnessshipperstuff-blog @pretty-pink-princesss @corpsebridenightamare @razertail18 @gachagator @droolingmuttt @miguelsfavwife @ryzguy06 @raideaters-blog @manishkaworld @keidilla @byjessicalotufo @pigeonmama @k3ythesapphic @acesangels @stealingyourturts @angel-xx-1 @amberbalcom14 @ofmenanduhhhwellmen @oscarissac2099 @keepghostly @zeyzeys-stuff @k3ythesapphic @nightingale1011 @mari0-o @uncle-eggy @safixiovi @flaps200 @dahehow @weirdothatwritess @gerblinradio @electronicchaoschaos @mafiaanomaly @pochapo

[dewdropdinosaur]

Kinktober Day 8: Cockwarming

Summary: You had no idea how you ended up in this position, slotted so prettily on your husband's aching cock as he left you to fend for yourself in the search for friction. Maybe you could convince him otherwise. Warnings: Cockwarming, the reader has a vagina, mentions of genitalia, pet names, etc. MDNI, 18+. You're responsible for your own media consumption. Kinktober Mention of the Day: @redvexillum Their writing is so scrumptious, I can't believe I am honored enough to exist in the same world as their masterpieces.

You could hardly stand it anymore, the teasing. How his smug smirk, nonchalant attention made your skin crawl in delicious ways that you wouldn’t dare to admit aloud. But he knew, you didn’t have to tell him. Your fingers dug into the plush velvet of your husband’s seat, weeping cunt slotted perfectly on his hard and angry cock. Hair disheveled, lips puffy and red from how hard his teeth had assulated them mere minutes ago…you couldn’t stand him anymore. 

The green light illuminated the office, allowing the soft pitter-patter of rain to take on an eerie glow through the oval window. Cascading streams of water glistened, letting the green street lights shake and shift across the floor with each passing droplet. When you had visited your husband late into the night, the Eye of Zaun hard at work scanning over various papers, you had no idea what would occur. With a steaming cup of tea in your hand, the whisps of steam wafting off it in a comforting air that could soothe even the worriest of worriers. You had crossed the hardwood floor, placed it gently on his desk as you propped yourself up on the corner. 

“Silco…it’s been hours.”

The world swam in that window’s green light, the hard maroon cushion,and those bi-colored eyes that penetrated your soul when he looked up to observe your form. Neither eye displayed much emotion to the untrained eye but after so long you could nearly tell what your husband was thinking. The orange eye held depths of a fire unknown and the loving rage of a thousand comets hurling towards each other with a fire too hot to be extinguished until they met. The blue, however,  the crystal blue one showed the most restraint surprisingly. You were wearing more casual clothes, a button up white shirt and a pair of maroon suit pants. Nothing you would have deemed anything worth the heated and lustful gaze you were receiving. 

“I know, my dear. But Zaun waits for no man.”

Filting around his chair, you sat in his lap, running your nimble fingers through the locks of his slicked back hair. Cooing softly as his head craned back in relaxation, you thought you had finally won him over for the night. 

“My dear, if you keep that up I will have no choice but to indulge myself in what else that heavenly body of yours can offer me.”

Choking back a surpirsed gasp, a frantic blush coating your cheeks, you halted your movements. You had no idea what had warranted such a bold reaction from the Industrailist, but here it seems that you had done something. 

That is how you ended up now, pussy full of cock, drooling onto the shoulder lining of Silco’s vest as he did nothing. Sliding slightly, attempting to get more friction, to feel him deeper inside you, his rough fingers came to grip your hips in a bruising manner. 

“Shhh now pet. You did this to yourself, looking so delicatable while I work.”  His breath was hot against the shell of your ear, one hand returning to scribble some notes down on the paper he was viewing while the other stayed on your hip. You let out a desperate whimper, grinding your hips down once more in a plea. Your nails dug into the fabric of his chair, tearing the material slightly. Growling into your ear that the friction you had caused, your husband roughly bucks his hips up into you. 

“Behave yourself. I’ll treat you well soon enough love…”

Guess you were here for a while then. 

[star-anise]

now, hold still—

I'd kill for some resources on body image in the context of disability, chronic pain, and having grown up with a complicated and intense medical history. I think I've exhausted my local library's offerings. Yes, I'm seeing a counsellor who focuses on this, and he's probably got recs, but I'm pacing my cage and lashing my tail in between sessions.

"Body image" has a particular connotation most of the time, because it comes out of the field that deals with eating disorders. Which is great and I'm glad for the people it works for, but its basic principles and assumptions are for completely different problems than the one I have.

I can't track down who said it first, but in my reading I keep coming across this narrative of, "I saw my body as something to be disciplined and controlled, an object only seen by external eyes. Now I've learned to take joy in what my body can do and experience, and to see it as a site of pleasure."

...Sounds fake, but okay.

My body is a site of pain. It cannot do or bear the experience of many things. I have to exercise a huge amount of discipline and control just to get out of bed every day. I can't imagine my body being a visible object that other people might find pleasing; it's incredibly hard to look up from my continual tooth-and-nail fight getting my body to let me live to imagine what someone who doesn't live with all this shit might see.

When I was a child, I learned to hold myself very still. For a hairdresser, or photographer, or a dentist, or someone who wanted to measure my height, or an injection, or a doctor who wanted a demonstration of how one of my joints looked, or an X-ray, or an IV inserted, or a CAT scan, or to have a cast taken off, or a PET scan, or to have a wound treated, or an MRI, or to have a pin pulled out.

And you know, I got proud of that. I felt like a brave warrior in a fantasy novel. I learned to take deep breaths, and take myself in my mind away from the anxiety and unpleasantness, until I could shut down my reaction to it. So that I didn't flinch or scream or cry. Because there was something wrong with my body, and doctors knew how to fix it.

When I was getting assessed for fibromyalgia, this new doctor told me he was going palpate areas in my back, arms, and knees. I get a lot of massage; I knew what was coming. I slowed my breathing, concentrating on the long outbreath. I took myself away from my reactions and thought continually, obsessively, about letting my body droop, weightless, like the moment when your aching limbs meet a solid surface and fresh cool sheets.

"Hm, I dunno," he said. "A lot of this checks out, but your trigger point exam was totally negative. Most people, when I touch those points, they have a big reaction. Some people even scream and jump off the table."

"Well, no," I think I said. "If I'd done that, it would have hurt way more, for like, hours." And I was polite about it, because you have to be polite to doctors; doctors know how to make you feel better. But what I felt at the time, and still feel today, is a kind of outrage I labelled was unreasonable the moment it was born: You wanted to hurt me, and it's my fault for not letting you?

How do you learn how to ask for things, when you've taught yourself to lie still and cry quietly because the nurse who said they'd be right back is helping someone who suddenly needs the help more? How do you express yourself, when you've spent your whole life gritting your teeth?

The problems I have about my body are not about being attractive or thin. They are, however, about being small. Learning to cry less, scream less, and ask for less. About feeling like my body is a burden to anyone who comes to know it, and like that's a burden I can't ask other people to take on unless I'm staggering under the weight of it.

Right now, what I've got is this:

Remember, you weren’t the one who made you ashamed, but you are the one who can make you proud. Just practice, practice until you get proud, and once you are proud, keep practicing so you won’t forget. You get proud by practicing.

[number1mingyustan]

-Cuffing Season-

Your Wants

boyfriend!mingyu x fem!reader

Warnings: established relationship, kissing, cursing, explicit smut, oral (f.), brief masturbation (m.), multiple orgasms, size kink, penetrative sex, kitchen sex, unprotected sex, pussy drunk gyu

Summary: He loves spoiling you

Word Count: 2.4k

_______________________________________________

“You look pretty,” Mingyu compliments as you walk through the front door.

You smile at him, going to place your shopping bags down on the floor. Mingyu however, is quicker than you and takes the large bags from your hands and carries them into the bedroom. “Thank you baby.”

He comes back into the kitchen and pulls you into him. He wraps his arms around your frame securely and it feels so good. His hugs always bring you comfort and you can get a good whiff of his scent. He always smells so good.

You hug him back, leaning into his embrace. It always feels nice to be greeted like this.

He pulls away, pressing a soft kiss on your lips. “What’d you buy?”

“Mm! Dresses and shoes. I know you have some business dinners coming up soon and I wanted something new to wear. Got a new bag too, it just dropped yesterday.”

“Oh really?” he raises an eyebrow.

“Yeah. But you know, the lady in the store was being such a bitch.” You say, walking over to the fridge and opening it. You grab a few grapes and pop one into your mouth.

Mingyu leans over the kitchen counter, resting his head on his hand as he listens to you. “How so?”

Damn he looks good.

He’s wearing his glasses today. You can tell he’s been working in his home office. He’s in nothing but a white wife beater and a pair of gray sweats. His biceps are on full display and his hair has grown a little longer, framing his face perfectly.

“Ugh, so I go into the store and I’m waking around looking and she’s just staring at me. Like the whole time the bitch is staring at me and then she starts following me around like I’m gonna steal something.”

“Seriously?”

You nod and pop another grape in your mouth. “So obviously she’s already pissing me off and you know me, so of course I say something to her.”

Mingyu chuckles and nods.

“So I turn around and I’m like ‘Is there a problem?’ And she pretends like she wasn’t following me around like a creep and tells me the most bullshit thing I’ve ever heard in my life. She was like ‘Nope, just making myself available in case you need anything.”

You pop another grape in your mouth.

“But I keep my cool and pick up everything I want, king you she’s still watching me but like from a little bit further away. So I finish all my shopping and go to the register to pay. Of course she wants to be the one to ring me up. And oh my gosh the fucking nerve of that bitch.”

“What did she do?” Mingyu asks.

“She rings everything up and then literally says to me ‘Are you sure you can afford this?’ Like who the hell does she think she is?”

Mingyu frowns. “She actually said that?”

“Yes! I was like, ‘I’m the one shopping here not the one working here.’ And I handed her to black card just to be a bitch about it.”

Mingyu snorts. “You used my black card?”

“Yes,” You pop the last grape into your mouth. “She was making me mad and I wanted to prove a point. It shut her up so fast too.”

Mingyu grins and walks around the counter. He wraps his large hands around you and pulls you in by your waist. “You know how much I love that about you.”

“What?” You look up at him.

“How you don’t take shit from anyone. You never let people push you around or treat you any kind of way. It’s so sexy.” He draws small circles along your sides.

“There’s no way I’d let her disrespect me like that. I would never just let her think I’m broke when I have you. Got me a man with a good job who makes good money and spoils me.” You look up at him and smile.

“Damn right,” He grins down at you.

Your hands are now holding onto his biceps.

“I see you got your hair and nails done too while you were out. Did you use the black card for that too?” He asks.

“No, I used your regular one. I didn’t need to use the black card, besides I didn’t know if it would make you mad since I already spent so much with it.”

He shrugs. “You know I love spoiling you anyway.” He licks his lips. “Did I tell you how good you look?”

You grin. “You did.”

“Hmm. Well you look really good baby.” He compliments.

Mingyu loved when you pampered yourself. He loved buying you things and spoiling you. At the beginning of your relationship you weren’t very receptive toward it. You preferred verbal and physical affection, not monetary.

However, you soon began to embrace and found a balance in your relationship. At first he loved taking you out to fancy dinners and spending more money than needed. He also began embracing your lifestyle, abiding to the fact that you preferred date nights like staying in and watching movies or going to the local food trucks in town that were cheap and much better than the overpriced dinners.

Now you embrace the gifts he gets you so long as date night is at his new favorite foodtruck that makes incredible wings.

You two could live a simple life and still dabble in the finer things.

He loved seeing you come home with having spent his money well. He liked knowing that he could provide for you and that you wouldn’t deny him unless he made a completely unreasonable purchase.

Mingyu worked so much and ensured his success. He loved his job, and admittedly the benefits too. With how much work he put in on a daily basis, he was sure as hell going to make sure you were taken care of.

He pulls you in closer by your waist. His tall stature stands above you, he looks down at you with pure affection in his irises.

“So pretty…” he mumbles. “Don’t wanna mess it up.”

“Mess what up?”

“Your hair. Wanna bend you over and pull on it but you just got it done,” He pushes a strand of hair behind your ear.

“Mingyu!”

“What? If I don’t fuck you from behind, then you’ll scratch up my back and you just got a fresh set. I’m weighing my options here baby.”

“Maybe your best option is not to fuck me,” You shrug.

“Yeah that’s not happening. You look too good right now for me not to.”

And without another word, he pulls you in with his big hands and kisses you. It’s intense and needy from the moment his lips touch yours.

It escalates quickly and before you know it, your back is pressed against the kitchen wall and your shirt is on the floor. His hands are moving up your skirt and he’s playing with the material of your panties.

His tongue is in your mouth and your body feels hot. He lifts you up with ease and carries you onto the counter without breaking the kiss. He’s so big and strong, feeling him scoop you up like it’s nothing makes your heart race faster.

He places you into the counter and spreads your legs in front of him. He takes off his glasses and places them on the counter next to you. He doesn’t give you time before he meets down and his head disappears under your skirt. He pushes your panties down to your ankle and attaches his lips onto your cunt.

“Shit…” You moan out.

His tongue laps your cunt deliciously. His tongue is warm and wet and it drives you crazy.

Mingyu is a giver. He gives and gives and never expects anything in return. Your happiness is his happiness.

He sucks on your clit, causing you to wrap your legs around his head tighter. He loved the feeling of it, being suffocating by your thighs.

It sends a rush straight to his cock. His hard length is poking up, straining against the material of his sweatpants as his tongue continues to pleasure you.

He’s moaning against your skin, sending vibrations through your body that only make you squirm above him. You’re gripping the edge of the counter tightly with your head tilted back.

“Ah-shit Gyu!” You moan loudly.

Your words only motivate him. He continues lapping your cunt with his tongue, relishing in your taste like a starved man.

As you feel your high approaching, you behind grinding against his face. He kneels there and takes it, flattening his tongue to stimulate your clit so you cum all over his face.

“Cumming-mmph!” You warn him.

Your orgasm hits and it hits hard. Your veins pop out as you hold onto the counter for deal life. You’re moving your hips against his face, wrapping your legs tighter around the circumference of his head.

It’s suffocating in the best way possible.

He doesn’t give you time to come down from your high at all. He refuses to let his mouth leave your cunt.

He’s slurping and lapping your pussy eagerly. He wants to taste you again. He can’t stop himself, he can’t help it. He just wants to give and give until you can’t handle it.

You let out a high-pitched whine and grip the counter harder. You try pulling away, but his hands are holding you down on the counter. His grips your thighs with his big hands, using his bulging muscles to stop you from running.

He’s merciless on your cunt, pleasuring you to the max. You’re writhing and crying out above him and he loves that he can pull this reaction out of you.

He could go down on you for hours on end, days even. As long as he can make you feel good, his heart is content.

It doesn’t take long before your second orgasm is building up and you’re really starting to lose it. Your thighs are tightening around his head and suffocating him again, serving as a tell that you’re about to cum again.

When you do, it’s more intense than the first ones You knuckles grow pale with how hard you grip the counter.

You’re completely soaking his face, crying out and moaning as he sends you back into a state of euphoria.

As you come down from your high, he slightly lifts his head and rises back to his feet. He stands back at his full stature, looking down at you with a smirk. He licks his lips and brushes his hair back.

“You good?” He asks.

You nod lazily. You look up at him with half-lidded eyes and breathe heavily.

He lifts you back up and helps you into your feet. You lethe are a bit shaky, but hold holds you up. You pay his arm softly letting him know he can let go. When he does, you stand up on your own and bend over the counter.

“Want you to fuck me Gyu.”

“Baby you just finished on my tongue twice. You don’t wanna take a break?”

“Are you really going to deny me what I want?” You look back at him with a pout. “Thought you liked spoiling me.”

“Of course I do baby,” He steps closer to you, hard cock now poking against your ass. You’re no longer facing him, but his head is in the curve of your neck. He whispers against your ear and leaves soft kisses on your neck. “I’ll give you anything you want.”

He holds you by the waist and unties the strings of his sweatpants. He lets out a breath of relief when he finally releases his aching cock from his sweats.

He throws his head back, letting out a quiet moan as he strikes himself behind you. His dock feels heavy in his hand and he can’t wait to be inside of you.

You feel the tip teasing your entrance as he holds you steady by the waist. You both moan out in unison as he enters you.

The stretch of his cock feels so good. You slump over the counter completely, lifting your ass up more to feel him.

“Feels so good…” He groans as he fills you up.

All you can do is nod weakly as you accommodate to the stretch of his length. Once he fills you up completely, he draws his hips back and starts thrusting into you.

His nails dig into your sides as he holds you steady. He knows he’ll pull on your hair and mess it up his he doesn’t hold onto you this way.

“Fuck” You moan out.

“Pussy so good..” he mumbles. “Fuck… I’d do anything.”

He watches the way your ass jiggled every time he thrusts into you. He’s mesmerized, eyes watching hungrily.

Your body jerks forward, pressing into the hard marble counter each time he bottoms out. You’re already starting to feel overstimulated and he’s hitting it just right.

His hand snakes between your thighs and his thumb begins circling your already sensitive clit. You hiss at the sudden contact

The stretch of his cock feels so good, his tip brushing against the one spot deep inside of you that drives you crazy.

You’re now gripping the other side of the counter to ground yourself. The larger man is fucking you with full force, just the way you like it.

“Cumming!” You warn him before you fall apart for the third time.

Your legs grow weak and wobbly as your orgasm courses through your body. He continues to fuck you through it thoroughly before his own orgasm hits.

When it does, he tightens his grip on your hips, pumping his seems inside of you and filling you up. You both stand in the kitchen breathless and sweaty.

“Damn it,” you groan.

You turn around, showing him your chipped nail. “I was gripping the counter too hard.”

He licks his lips and runs his fingers along yours. “Sweated out your hair a bit too.”

He pulls his sweatpants back up and digs into his pocket. He pulls out his wallet and hands you 3 hundred dollar bills with a wink.

“Go get yourself fixed up okay baby? And don’t worry, it’s on me.”

_______________________________________________

© number1mingyustan - Do not repost without permission.

[m1ssunderstanding]

Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 3.2

The thing is Paul just physically can't say what he feels. It's just an impossibility for him. So if he says reading a negative article about himself “doesn't help” or “it's not good” but it “doesn't get home” I just assume he means ‘It hurts, but I can't think about that too hard or I'll go into a self-hate suicidal spiral again’. 

I always love how Paul says Linda. “Linder is er, nature mad.” 

She!!

Hearing Paul talk about watching Mary be born makes me wonder if John was there with Sean? Also I wonder if Linda would talk about the experience so glowingly. Probably. She's tough as nails. I had a lovely experience, personally, after the epidural lol

“Dear friend . . . I'm in love with a friend of mine.” This is such a strange and beautiful song. It's a man who has to apologize to his friend for falling in love with someone else. At least, that's my interpretation. What's everyone else's?

I understand why he's so closed off. I do. But when John is going off every five seconds, we're missing half the picture here and it's turning out warped. They really are such a good study of attachment honestly.

“Nothing will ever break the love we have for each other.” White-knuckling my way through this section with this quote clenched in my fist.

Yoko, talking about John fighting with Paul: any couple will go from swearing to kissing and it's like that. What favors are you doing yourself here, babe? Maybe John's the PR mastermind between the two of them.

I find John's comparison of working with his romantic partner to being ambidextrous very confusing. Does he mean just doing two things at once?

“If I can't have a fight with my best friend, I don't know who I can have a fight with.” -- Intro slutty gender-fluid Wings Paul my beloved -- “Tell me why, why, why do you treat me so bad? So bad? When you're the best friend a man ever had?” I heard on some podcast somewhere. Someone was going on about how forward-thinking the Beatles were to refer to the women in their songs as “friends”. And I was like, nununununu do not give them that credit.

This is just soooo. In this era? 90 minutes in the middle of a recording session?

John: Sorry, my estranged fiance is calling, gotta take a break. Guitarist: again? Drummer: how estranged can they be if they call every three minutes? Yoko: should we just record the other parts or . . . John: (receiver cradled to his cheek, lovesick grin on his face) Hey, how was Heather's school program? Haha, yeah, I bet she was.

Okay, so you've made up with Paul and now you're done being homophobic? *Cardi b voice* well that's suspicious. 

The fact that John's asking Paul to play on stage with him in 1972?? Ugh! If it was just about legalities and money and shit I would be genuinely so pissed at Paul for not going. If only because Come Together sounds incredibly lame without his bass and piano. But also for the obvious fix-it reasons. I have to remind myself of how truly awful Klein was. By being the only one to stand firm against him, Paul actually ended up saving them all from a lot of trouble. But gosh would this have been good!

Things normal people say, for sure, for sure.

Okay in my head it went like this. John calls George and bitches about what an egomaniac Paul is because he won't do anything with him as long as Klein is involved. George gets off the phone and calls Ringo and they make a bet as to how long it is until John decides they should get rid of Klein. 

“Where's your audience, Paul?” “In the theater, Dave.” As he should. The cuntiness is unparalleled. Yeah, maybe people like to see a family friendly eclectic magic pixie sexy hard rock floor show? Ever thought about that, Dave?

Anyway, he seems genuinely pissed when the interviewer even mentions the other Beatles and he refuses to even admit he still talks to any of them. Why? 

John's just so benevolent and selfless. He's completely straight, of course, but he's always offering to do gay shit. You know. To be nice. 

I forget that not only was May their literal employee, but she was ten years younger on top of that. And yet, she managed to do so much good in that relationship. I have so much respect for her. 

There's obviously a lot going on behind the scenes that they don't say in interviews. Duh. But I wonder what it is that caused Paul to be so open and happy in this interview where he's asked about the other Beatles compared to before. I wonder if he and John had a really lovely talk, or if he's heard a demo of “I know, I know.” Or maybe it's just he's so reassured that they've got rid of Klein that he feels safe acting open to a reunion on record. Who knows, Yoko. 

So so smart to pair “In My Life” handwritten lyrics with the matching lyrics of “I know I know” playing at the same time. I forget about that connection (“I love you more”) because it's so overshadowed by the “than yesterday” right after. I seriously wonder if John thought he was being so obvious with this one the way he was with HDYS and half hoped people would ask him if it was about Paul and he could make up for the whole thing. Because it's just so heavy-handed. It's beautiful. I love it. I'm sure Paul loved it. But yeah. John's just beating us over the head with the references here. 

I also wonder (very tentatively!!!) if Paul was maybe a bit more emotionally vulnerable with John than we usually think. I would never think this except for the “you know I nearly broke down and cried” “I'm sorry that I made you cry” and “no more crying!” I don't know. What do we think? 

His little baby smirk. It's so silly and cute. He's being very positive about getting back together, and the interviewer asks if John would initiate that. Just a very coy, “a, well, I couldn't say.” I wonder if at that point if he'd said on live tv that he wanted to get together again if it would've happened. Seems like it might have, but I understand him being scared. 

Elton John taking pictures like a fan and John: I wanna impound all those photos till I get me green card. What a random idea for a commercial. I love it, obviously, it's hilarious. I wonder who thought of it. 

This doc is so good at implication. The smirk as “loving in the palm of my hand” plays. That's not a reference to hand jobs, is it? Certainly not talking to someone with beautiful hands?

Everyone go look up Nineteen Hundred Eighty Five on YouTube. The singing sex is something else, yeah, but I'm always so blown away by the piano part. The fact that he's self taught and doesn't read music and this man will go on to compose symphonies. 

[sunsbleeding]

A friend may think they know you, brushed your hair softer than your own mother ever cared to, told you their dirtiest secrets and desires behind bar bathroom doors while club music thumped in the backdrop, danced naked under the moon in the loneliness of a summers night; making everything shine with a fake goodness you came to believe with your whole bloody torn up skin and shaky hands.

They think that their pandering is akin to true kindness and adoration, but true love cares, true love sits with you, without poison waiting in the back of their mouths, waiting to be spit out the moment you’re not there to hear it. Not there to defend anything you’ve ever done. After thinking long and hard I don’t think this person has ever truly loved anyone real, they date a character in their head to cope with the fact that they are incapable of making real human connection, i pity them but i will not swallow their knife. I can’t name one person that they haven’t talked ill of.

Real love does not include pulling the carpet out from under someone when they are already laying in the gutter. I know they believe in their blackened rotted guts, reeking of sewage and bile, that their good and kind, and I blame myself, I wanted love so bad I let this person get away with treating people in such heinous ways, the shame shall last forever. I still find myself wishing the best for those who have treated me as nothing more than scuffs on their shoes, dirt trapped under their finger nails.

I have a hard sureness that they can love, but it’s not a love I’ll ever receive, and not a love I’d ever want. A love that belongs to someone out their who is good at being a doormat, a good girl, someone who’s not sick the way I am, someone who doesn’t mind being belittled until there’s nothing of themselves but crumbs.

I set nothing ablaze, i just spoke the truth, and to many people this is a burden too big to carry so they turn it into something they can stomach and make it into bullshit poetry, just chomping at the bit to make their ugly hearts seem pretty to strangers on the internet.

I took off the dumb heart shaped glasses and saw that there was nothing but an emptiness so big and cavernous that there is no possible way our hearts every really touched, we never shared blood and spit, we shared lies and stage plays, and in the right light, well, that looks like love too.

I drive home in the dark, and I know it’s over before the sun rises, before the first text is sent, I take betrayal like a knife in the belly and I’m no good at hiding my pain. My pain knows nothing but rage. I drive away for the last time wondering if anything is real at all and then a song comes on that I haven’t heard before and I get three messages asking me if I’m okay, and I know, I believe that there is good in this cruel world.

[sublimecatgalaxy]

could u write a angsty elliot fic?? also your other elliot fics are so good!!

I love my Elliot requests with all of my heart, he's one of my favorite people to write for :) thank you for this!!

"So you've been hanging with Jules a lot." I call out from my computer, looking at Elliot who dangles off my bed with a joint between his lips, a shrug on his shoulders.

"Yeah, she's cool. We've been worrying about Rue together, mutual interest, I guess." He explains vaguely and I feel a pang hit my heart as I recall seeing all three of them talking and laughing with each other after lunch, without me and in between classes, not even caring enough to invite me.

"Yeah, you've been spending all your study halls with her and Rue outside in the corridor. I would've liked an invite." I laugh it off but his brows pull together, obviously annoyed by my intention behind bringing this up and making that subtle jab.

"Yeah but they don't know you like that." He scoffs with a twisted, pained smile and I can tell he's trying to tell me to politely fuck off and explain to me that he doesn't want me hanging out with him and his friends but at this point, after weeks of wondering, I'd rather him put me out of my misery.

"Then help them know me like that, we're dating, Elliot." I set my computer aside, the frustration of weeks finally bubbling to the surface as my eyes turn to slits, glaring at him from across the room, neither of us moving or speaking for a few moments as awkward silence swarms around us.

"I guess. I don't see why this is such a big deal to you." He mutters, looking down at his hands and I know he hopes that that would be the end of it but it only fuels my fire more, blood boiling in long anticipated anger.

"Because you're choosing to spend time with these two girls that you don't even know that well over me, the person that you've been with for over a year." I'm on my feet now, marching over to the bed and standing directly in front of him as he obliviously ignores my presence, picking at the skin around his nails till it's red and inflamed.

"I know but they're cool." He mutters, almost as if he's a kid who's being heckled and nagged by a parent and it almost makes me impossibly angrier with him but instead, it hits my heart in a certain way that brings tears to my eyes, feeling completely and utterly unappreciated and overlooked.

"So am I, you'd know that if you actually spent time with me." The silence now is filled with anger instead of annoyance and I pause for a moment, feeling nervous, knowing that when he's angry, he's really angry. He looks up at me with annoyance and frustration behind his once happy hues and I begin to blame myself for even bringing this up in the first place.

"I don't have to spend 24/7 with you to be a good boyfriend." He snaps and I snap right back, hoping to finish the argument so I can storm off and be done with this once and for all.

"Yeah but you at least have to give me the bare minimum and treat me like you actually like me." I laugh mockingly and he smiles, tilting his head in a calculated way that has my stomach dropping and I know that I'm in for no good, knowing how passive aggressive and petty he can be when pushed into a corner.

"Well you acting like this doesn't make me want to hang out with you any more than I'm already suffering through."

...

What?

"What-" The words barely make it out of my mouth before he's on his feet, hands incasing my shoulders as he tries to get me to look at him but the bile is already in my throat and my heart feels a tight pain around it. I shake my head, pushing him away as he frantically grasps at me.

"I didn't mean it. I'm sorry-"

"Get out." He goes to speak once more but I hold my hand up to him while mumbling. "Shut the fuck up and get out of my house."

[nina-ya]

lawlu brat enablers!! luffy lets you do whatever, especially bratty stuff yknow hes all for your freedom and free will, besides, you cant rlly rile him up anyways, he takes it in pride when you try anyways, he likes it

but law on the other hand, is still an enabler, but for different reasons, he will begrudgingly huff and sigh, letting you drag him around and indulging you, but only so that at the end of it he has a reason to punish you, its nothing like luffy, lu loves to see you happy, your (+his) pleasure being one of his best reasons, even in bed

but law is different, having a reason to edge, punish or even spank you, oh thats the real treat for him

eg talking back and arguing, running your mouth; with luffy its all fun and games, he likes having back and forths with you, it'll just end up in a heavy make out sesh, you on his lap, the dry humping and such

but with law, it gives him reason to shut your mouth, make you sorry, beg even (on your knees preferably)

now, an actual scenario where you end up getting gravely injured; law fixes you up but luffy is quick to ask if your okay, kiss you as much as he can, he was worried but trusted you enough

not like law, he is rlly protective, obsessive even and is therefore angry, irritate at you

so you end up like this, in this position, on all fours as law rails you, hands gripping at your hips possessively, blunt nails digging into the flesh of your hips. you're hovering over luffy who is laying beneath you, eager to kiss you, theres a trail of saliva conecting your mouths and luffy is panting, reaching his head up to connect your lips once again

something that lawlu do have in common is that they are rentless and take everything they can get <3

(i am SO SORRY that this is so long, something overtook me, also feel free to elaborate on this cuz i luv your writings and thoughts!!)

hhggnnnnn ohhh fuck nonnie i am rattling the bars of my enclosure i am so unwell you have no idea i kinda went overboard myself and kinda blabbered on so i am begging you to keep spilling those thoughts to me CW: penetrative sex, rough sex, not bet read i just wrote this in one sitting without editing or looking back lets goooo

Luffy absolutely enjoys the back and forth between you two, and its all fun and games until he is just looking at you with a dopey grin, loving the look on your face when you get so frustrated and annoyed until he grabs you, pulling you against him as he kisses you deeply. And before you know it, you're straddling him, griding against him as his hands are squeezing your hips tight enough to leave marks, heavily panting and moaning into each others mouths as you chase your highs

and its just so opposite with Law; like you said he would huff and sigh and groan but he knows deep down that he is just waiting for the moment to get you two alone so he can put you in his place. I am just picturing a moment where you are running your mouth, taunting and challenging him with every sentence that spills from your lips. His eyes are fixed on you with that intense stare, and you just know youre in for it later. He would wait until you're alone before he would pounce. His grip on you is brutal as he makes you get on your knees, shutting you up in the best way he knows-- with his cock shoved down your throat and tears streaming down your face as you choke and gasp for air

and when you get injured, those differences in reactions that you mentioned are absolutely present. Luffy is all about making sure you are okay and showering you with reassurances and kisses and affection. He trusts you without a doubt he knows you are a capable person, but that doesn't stop him from worrying for you

Law is just furious. Not at you, but at the situation, at the danger you put yourself in. That anger is a form of protectiveness in itself. He's quick to patch you up, but once thats done, Immediately on all fours for you. Your knees are digging into whatever surface below you as he positions himself behind you. There's no gentleness, just those hands on your hips with a bruising force as he lines himself up with your entrance.

And when he thrusts into you, he's relentless, each stroke powerful and a demand that you remember who is in control here. The way he fills you, stretches you, leaving you gasping, each thrust pulling whines and moans from your lips. And luffy is right under you to capture those moans with his own lips, his mouth moving against yours hungrily, swallowing your sounds of pleasure.

Law's pace is merciless; you can feel the sting of his nails digging into your skin, adding to the mix of sensations youre experiencing. "You need to be more careful" he would growl, his voice a combination of anger and lust. "I can't have you getting hurt. Understand?"

And you can only nod, too lost in your own intense pleasure-pain filled haze to form coherent words. Luffy just loves seeing you like this; he wouldn't know where to place his hands so they would always be roaming and squeezing different parts of you, but his lips always find their way to yours. He just cant get enough of you.

"so pretty like this," Luffy would murmur against your lips, his hands finding their way to your chest, squeezing the flesh and pinching your nipples between his fingers, making you jolt.

Laws thrusts would grow harder, each thrust bullying that one spot in you that has your brain melting. "tell me you understand" he would demand, urging you to answer vocally.

and thats when you would gasp, choking out some variation of "I understand" with a trembling voice that made it clear that you mind was not on his words but at the feelings coursing through your body.

Law would grunt in acknowledgement, his grip tightening as he increases his pace, the sound of flesh meeting flesh bouncing off the walls of the room. The stimulation from both of the men pushing you closer and closer to the edge.

The pressure would build inside of you until a bearable peak, your body trembling as you near your release. "Please," you would whimper, your plea directed more at Law than anyone.

And he would deny your request, growling out a "Go ahead, youve earned it" as his thrusts becoming slightly more erratic as he nears his own climax.

Finally, Law's thrusts would stutter, his hips slamming into you harshly, burying himself deep into you as he spilled inside of you. The feeling triggers your own orgasm, and you clench violently around him, trembling and gasping as you milk his cock. Luffy is right there to capture your cries with his mouth, kissing you deeply as you ride out your orgasm, his own arousal evident by the way his hips unconsciously ground against yours, desperate for more contact.

And when it's over, you collapse against Luffy, your body absolutely spent and satisfied. Law's hands, once rough against you, now gently stroke your back as he heaves, catching his own breath before collapsing against you. The three of you would lie there in a tangled sweaty mess, the air thick with the smell of sex

[1004tyun-archive]

❥ i love you. i want us both to eat well

✶ pairing: idol!taehyun x non idol! chubby reader

✶ summary: taehyun's coming to stay with you for the week and you feel it's time for a big change. but you don't realize it's an unneeded change until it's too late

✶ genres: angst, hurt/comfort with lots of smut at the end (as a treat!)

✶ warnings: reader has a bad relationship with food, intrusive thoughts, bulimia, negative self talk, brief mention of vomiting, mentions of weight, eating disorders, negative body image, praise kink, squirting, edging, face sitting, unprotected sex

✶ word count: 4.7k words

✶ a/n: i've noticed a general lack of chubby reader fics so i thought i'd do my part and write a hurt/comfort fic involving tyun ^_^ this was very comforting for me to write personally, but if any of the aforementioned warnings are triggering to you in any way, i don't recommend reading. i don't want any of you to get hurt or apply the very harmful things the reader does in this fic to your lives.

this fic is NOT endorsing disordered eating. i do not endorse nor support thinspo, body shaming, eating disorders, or hating your body, no matter your size. as a plus size person myself, i think it's important to love your body as it is and i hope this fic provides solace and comfort to those who have a bad relationship with food or their bodies. you're beautiful the way you are and i hope you're able to love your body the way taehyun loves your body in this fic <3

love you lots 🫶🏾 if you need anyone to talk to about this subject matter, my inbox and messages are always open x

It's a slow work day; slow, boring, and tedious.

And you're starving.

You forgot to bring your lunch with you so your measly meal of a granola bar and black coffee was nothing to write home about. You can't wait to get home and eat some real food while facetiming your lovely boyfriend.

On the way to your apartment complex, you see a gift shop with a TV playing compilations of idol dance challenges from Tiktok from the display window. You decided to stop and watch for a bit once you recognized one of the Taehyun's fellow group members. Sure enough, the next video that plays is one with Taehyun in it.

Oh, he looks so good. He's doing some kind of girl group dance with a couple of the group's members. The girls are dressed so cutely with perfectly manicured hair and nails and makeup. There's a voice in the back of your head that's saying things you don't want to hear, so you ignore it.

But with every step closer to your apartment, the voice grows louder and louder.

They look so much better with him than you ever could.

They're prettier and skinnier than you. You don't think you actually deserve him, do you?

He's probably cheating on you with one of those girls. Who could blame him? He's too good for you, you both know that.

There's a bad taste in your mouth by the time you get to your front door. Despite your brain doing everything it can to ruin your day, you decide to rummage through the fridge for some food anyway.

You're pretty good at keeping the fridge stocked when Taehyun isn't around, but as soon as you start assessing your options, your appetite starts to wane. You think back to those gorgeous female idols you saw on television, with their glamorous bodies.

Slender waists, rounded hips, lithe arms and legs, dainty hands, and long, silky hair.

You don’t look like that, you know you don’t.

But maybe you could if you tried a little harder.

Your phone ringing snaps you out of your spiraling thoughts. Seeing Taehyun on your phone screen immediately eases your pain.

"I saw you on TV today," you say.

"Oh yeah? Was I cool?"

"You were the coolest," you say with a smile.

"Did you eat?" he asks and your throat goes dry.

"Yeah, I went out to get something before I got home. Did you?"

"Mhm, I just got done eating dinner."

Taehyun looks a little antsy, like he wants to say something so you call him out on it.

"Everything okay?" you ask.

"Yeah, it's- Okay, I wanted to surprise you, but I can't keep it in. I finally have a break in my schedule so I'll be home all week starting next Sunday,"

"What? Baby, that's great news! I can't wait to finally see you. It's been too long! I mean, I know it's only been a week since we saw each other, but still!"

By the time you hang up, your heart is soaring. You get to stay with your boyfriend for a whole week! What sounds basic to some sounds like paradise to others, truly. The life of dating an idol is a very different world, to say the least.

You looked down at your stomach and frowned as you squeezed its flesh. You've put on some stress weight, no doubt about it. What would Taehyun think? Yes, you were chubby when he first met you and you're chubby now, but there's no doubt he would notice the weight you've put on recently.

He's going to be home in less than a week. What if he realizes he deserves better and he's been settling for you this whole time? Taehyun is a celebrity, he could have anyone he wants. So why you, of all people? You both know he could never go public with his relationship with you for privacy reasons, but maybe it wasn't just that.

Maybe he was ashamed to be seen with you.

As you go to bed later that night with an empty stomach, you recognize that something has to change.

So when the next morning comes, you decide to start with eating less and walking to work instead of taking public transit. You learned to appreciate the four mile walk there and back every day to appreciate the morning dew and the passing scenery as you listened to your favorite songs.

But it wasn’t enough. You weren’t losing weight quickly enough and the ideal version of yourself who lived in your head wasn’t matching your reflection in the mirror.

So you start going running every day after work. You run a couple of laps on the track at the community center near your workplace. You feel energized after working out so much, but damn, you're hungry. No matter how much your stomach growls, you wave off the voice telling you to eat and drink some cold water to satiate your hunger instead.

The next thing you know, it's D-Day. Taehyun is coming home tonight and you can't wait. You don't work weekends, but you keep up with your routine regardless. You walk to your workplace and then run your several laps around the track until you've sufficiently tired yourself out.

By the time you get home, you're able to shower, clean the apartment, and relax for a few hours.

You're watching a program about weight loss on your laptop when you get a call from Taehyun and immediately pick up.

“Me and the guys were thinking about getting dinner tonight. Wanna come?”

You're glad he can't see the discomfort on your face.

“No thanks, I’m swamped with work tonight.”

“Are you sure? We’re going to your favorite chicken place.”

“I’m sure, love. Thanks.”

“Okay, let me know if you want anything.”

It hurt a part of your soul to decline going to your favorite restaurant. You swear the savory, sweet and spicy crunch of that hot honey fried chicken had healing properties. But you have bigger things to worry about. You need to stay focused.

You fall asleep on the couch and startle awake when you hear the front door of your apartment clicking open.

“I’m home,” Taehyun calls from the entryway. His voice is followed by the sound of rustling plastic bags. You slide your laptop off your lap and give your boyfriend a quick kiss on the lips.

“Welcome home,” you say, then take a look at the plastic bags Taehyun is carrying in each hand. “What’s all this?”

“Some extras from dinner. I brought some stuff back for you, too.”

Your stomach twists. “Oh, honey you didn’t need to do that.”

“I never believe you when you don’t ask for anything,” he says with a laugh. “Anything you don’t finish you can take to work tomorrow.”

“Thank you,” you smile but you feel like you’re dying inside. Why does he have to be so considerate? As nice as the gesture is, you’re not eating a single bit. You swear to yourself that you won’t.

As delicious as that food looks and smells, successfully resisting temptation feels better than that food could ever taste.

You brush off the gurgling of your stomach as you go through your nighttime ablutions.

It’s 4:00 AM when your cravings become too strong to ignore. The growling of your stomach grows louder, unbearably so.

You turn your head to check on Taehyun, he’s still fast sleep. Maybe this was the perfect time to do what you wanted to do.

You sneak off to the kitchen, grab the cold paper boxes of food and arrange them on your small dining table. Smelling and looking at the food isn’t the same as eating it, you tell yourself. There’s nothing wrong with smelling or observing the food, as long as you don’t eat it.

This should be easy…

Shouldn't it?

You black out hours later and the first thing you’re faced with is a multitude of empty takeout boxes. Two boxes of fried chicken, a box of garlic fries, steamed rice, and two apple mango hand pies. Foods that are usually your favorites yet all you could do was panic.

You start hyperventilating and your vision blurs as you stumble to the bathroom and kneel in front of the toilet, shoving your index finger down your throat and trying your hardest to remove any of the food you ate. After reaching deep enough, you gag around your finger and vomit, bile stinging your throat and tears filling your eyes. You empty your stomach and vomit until nothing but stomach acid comes up, the metallic taste coating your mouth.

"Y/N?" Taehyun asks from behind the door. "Are you okay?"

A string of drool hangs from your bottom lip and you've never felt more repulsed by yourself until now.

"I'm fine, just a little sick."

"I'm coming in—"

"—No! No, I'm okay. Don't worry about me."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm fine, honey, really. I'll see you later tonight, okay?"

"Okay, see you tonight." You can hear the doubt in his voice. It pains you to lie to him like this, but you know this would upset him. You gather enough strength to drag yourself up from the bathroom floor and start getting ready for work.

That was a close call. There's no way you can let that happen again. The binging, the vomiting, having Taehyun worry about you, any of it. If you were planning on continuing this, you had to be discrete about it, even if it meant lying to your boyfriend's face.

So you decide to stop eating altogether.

And at first, you feel fine.

You're able to get through the work day by chewing gum or drinking cold water to keep yourself awake. When Taehyun comes home with food or cooks for the both of you, you lie and say you already ate at work or you're not hungry.

And you know Taehyun senses that something is wrong, but you can't tell him. You could never tell him.

This wasn't going the way you expected it to.

You wanted to enjoy coming home from work and have Taehyun play your househusband for the week, but by the time you get home every night, you're so exhausted. You fall asleep on the couch, sometimes even mid conversation, and you wake up hours later with a pounding headache and a blanket thrown over you, courtesy of your sweet boyfriend.

And by the end of the week, you hardly have the energy to even stand up in the shower.

"Have a good day at work today," Taehyun says and gives you a kiss on the forehead at the door. That on its own gives you enough energy to make it through today.

You cross the crowded street, feeling normal, albeit a bit tired.

And then, out of nowhere, you feel like someone pulled the plug on you.

The next thing you see is the blurry ceiling of a hospital room, nothing but beige and speckles. You gasp like you’ve just come up for air and look around. You're connected to an IV and a heart rate monitor and, out of the corner of your eyes, you see...

"Y/N!"

Taehyun rushes to your side, taking your hand in his. Your heart is pounding when you see him. He looks so worried. He must've been so afraid for you.

"Y/N, why? Why didn't you tell me something was wrong? Why'd you do this to yourself?" he asks, standing tears in his eyes. Your heart sinks. There's no way he doesn't know how you got here.

This wasn’t supposed to happen.

He wasn't supposed to find out.

You were supposed to silently starve yourself until you became beautiful. Not worry him like this.

You failed. Your throat goes dry, rendering you unable to speak.

You just sit there silently and sob.

You’re discharged the following afternoon. Taehyun doesn’t speak to you the entire ride home and you feel like utter shit for it.

As you step into your shared apartment and kick off your shoes in the entryway, you decide to finally break the silence.

“Taehyun, I’m so sorry. You weren’t supposed to find out about this—“

“—Why? Why wouldn’t you want me to find out? They told me you passed out in the middle of the street! You could’ve gotten hurt! What if something serious happened to you and I never found out?”

You stand there in silence, tears filling your eyes. He’s never sounded this upset with you in the nearly two years you’ve been together. You could feel your heart shattering.

“Why’d you stop eating?”

The gravity in Taehyun’s voice makes your stomach drop. You need to sit down for this one.

You walk to the couch in the living room and Taehyun follows, sitting next to you.

“I starved myself because I wanted to be beautiful,” you say.

“You are beautiful.”

“But that’s not all. I wanted to be good enough, good enough for you.”

Taehyun looks at you, brows knit in concern. He takes your hand in his.

“What made you think that? Did someone say something to you?”

“No, no one said anything. It was all me. I kept seeing all those beautiful, successful female celebrities on TV and I-I wondered if you even felt good being seen with me, so I thought that… maybe if I stopped eating, I would be better for you.”

You feel so ashamed by even admitting this and, when you’re able to finally look at Taehyun, he looks devastated, like you admitted the greatest of sins to him.

“I never want you to say that again,” he says, sounding deeply hurt. “There’s no way you could be any more better for me. You’re perfect, Y/N. I can’t imagine being with anyone else except you. I've never been ashamed to be seen with you. You know that, don't you?"

Taehyun cups your cheek with his hand and it takes everything for you to not burst into tears.

“Don’t you?” he repeats softly and that drives you over the edge. “You know there’s nothing you could do to make me ashamed of you, right?”

You cry and he wipes your tears away with the pads of his thumbs.

“Not even now?” you ask between sniffles.

“No, honey, not even now,” he leans in and kisses your cheeks. “I don’t want to lose a single ounce of you.”

He kisses your face all over and when he kisses you on the lips, you smile into it. This is the happiest you've been all week and the most relief you've felt in a while. You feel so embarrassed for the tears that continue to slide down your cheeks, but Taehyun just wipes them away and kisses you.

It's when he kisses your ear that you feel a sudden shift in the mood. He nibbles your earlobe and his lips drag down to kiss down your jaw. Your breath hitches and you hold back a moan.

"Don't hold back," he whispers into your ear. "Let me know how good I make you feel."

You sigh as you feel his lips move to your neck and he bites and licks the flesh, leaving a few hickies in his wake. You hold onto him tighter, the fabric of his shirt balled up in your fist.

Taehyun's hands move to your hips and before you know it, you're sitting on his lap, straddling him. You're a little hesitant, not putting all of your weight on him.

Taehyun grabs your hand and places it on the center of his chest. His heart is pounding against your palm and it causes your own heartbeat to quicken.

“Feel that? Only you can do that,” he says. He takes your hand and drags his down his body, down his toned chest, past his chiseled abs, all the way down to his cock, already halfway hard in his sweatpants.

“This is all you, too,” he whispers and your breath catches in your throat when you feel his cock twitch under your fingers.

“Oh my god…” you say, shuddered and breathless.

Taehyun grips your hips hard and pulls you down so your full weight is on him and you grind on his clothed bulge. He's never been this rough with you before, and it's giving you butterflies. You roll your hips and you revel in his hands roaming your thighs, your ass, and your waist.

You return to each other's lips like a magnet to metal. You drag your tongue across Taehyun's bottom lip and he parts his lips so you can slot your tongue into his mouth.

You pull away panting, your lips shimmering with spit. You squirm, wanting to say exactly how you feel but the words are stuck in your throat as you look upon your boyfriend, his hair tousled, lips glossy, and eyes dark.

"What is it, honey? Use your words," he says, looking deep into your eyes.

"I-I need you so badly, I can’t take it."

"Then let's tend to that need right now," he says with a smirk. You head to the bedroom and you're surprised when Taehyun pushes you onto the bed and hovers over you, drinking in every inch of your body.

"God, you're so beautiful," Taehyun says. "No one else gets to see this except me."

He peels off his clothes, down to his boxers and he slowly undresses you, peppering kisses all over your body. He presses a thumb to your now dampened panties and watches with sparkling eyes as he rolls your panties off of you.

"Wait, my turn," you grab at the waistband of his boxers and the corner of his lips turn up into a smirk.

"Be my guest," he says confidently. Your hands tremble a little bit as look down at his clothed cock. You notice a damp spot and that only serves to make you wetter. You slowly pull the boxers down past his thighs and his hardened cock springs free. He kicks his boxers off and immediately comes back down to the bed to kiss you, his cock resting against your soft stomach.

He slides his thick cock against your aching pussy and you shudder when you feel a vein rub against your clit.

“You’re so wet,” he whispers sweetly. “Can’t wait to be inside of you, honey... But before that, I need you to promise me something."

"Hm?"

"Promise me that you'll eat when you're hungry and take care of yourself."

You blink, confused at the sudden 180.

"What?" you ask. Suddenly, you're jolted by Taehyun slapping his cock against your clit with a wet thwack. Your back arches off the bed and your eyes widen.

“Promise me or I won’t fuck you.”

You gulp and you can feel yourself blushing all the way to the tips of your ears.

“I-I promise,” you say before Taehyun slaps his cock against your clit repeatedly, causing you to squirm and moan.

“Promise what?”

“I-I promise I’ll eat.”

“And?”

“I promise I’ll take care of myself,” you whimper. "I promise I'll treat myself better."

Taehyun gives you a cute, boyish smile.

"Good," he leans down to rest his forehead against yours and kiss you. You feel the head of his cock poke and rub against your entrance and you whine. He pushes into you and you gasp, grabbing onto his arms to steady yourself as he slowly enters you, inch by inch. You clench around him tightly and he sighs.

"You feel amazing," he groans. "You okay?"

"Mhm, feels so **good," you moan and Taehyun leans down to kiss you again. He buries himself deeper into you until he bottoms out and you wrap your legs around his torso, shuddering at the sensation of him buried so deep inside of you. He pulls out all the way then sinks all the way back in to fuck you at a fast, even pace. Your eyes roll back in pleasure, relishing just how full he makes you feel.

"Mmm, I-I'm close, 'm so close," you mewl, clenching hard around Taehyun's cock.

“Cum for me,” he breathily demands as he reaches down to play with your clit, pleasure shooting through your body like lightning.

Your orgasm rips through you like nothing you'd ever felt before. Taehyun is relentless, continuing to fuck you as you ride the waves of your orgasm.

"That's it, that's it," he coos. "So good, baby." He swipes his thumb against your clit quickly as he thrusts into you, urging you to cum again. You feel a different kind of pressure building in your lower stomach, one that you can't stop from releasing until it's already happened. The sheets underneath you are soaked and your entire body heats up as you realized what you've done.

"Wow," Taehyun says, astonished. "I've never seen you do that before. Fuck, you're so wet."

He mercilessly pistons in and out of you, sweet moans spilling from his mouth as he cums inside of you. He buries his face in your shoulder and you can feel his lips curl into a smile.

“Hear that?” he asks.

Through the haze of your post-orgasm, you can hear the sound of wet skin slapping against skin as Taehyun lazily ruts into you, rolling his hips against yours.

“So messy… you made such a big mess all over my cock,” he babbles, breathless and impressed. You’re shocked to feel his cock twitch inside of you when he says that.

Taehyun slowly pulls out of you and you whine, already missing the presence of his cock inside of you. He rolls over next to you so that you’re laying shoulder to shoulder on the bed.

You both take a moment to catch your breath, your breathing still ragged from just moments ago.

“Come here,” he says. “I want you to do that on my face next.”

“Taehyun!” you gasp. You don’t remember him being so filthy like this before. He’s had his flirty and handsy moments in the past, but those were nothing compared to this side of him.

He motions for you to come straddle him and you’re immediately seized with nervousness.

“Don’t be shy, love,” he says. “Or do I need to get you over here myself?”

“Okay, okay,” you prop yourself up on your elbows and slowly inch yourself closer toward Taehyun until you’re straddling his waist.

“Good girl, now put your thighs on either side of my chest.”

This is the first time he’s ever called you a good girl and honestly? You want him to say it a million more times. A tingle goes down your spine as you follow his instructions, maybe he should boss you around like this more often.

You feel more exposed than ever as you just barely hover over his face. You’ve never done anything in this position before, your heart is racing out of excitement and worry.

“Are you sure you’re okay with doing this?”

“Mhm,” Taehyun says. “I’ve been dreaming of doing this for a while now, actually.”

“But what if I hurt you? I don’t wanna put too much weight on you and—“

“—Y/N, you’re thinking too hard about this.”

“I know,” you say. You squeak when you feel Taehyun press a kiss to your pussy.

“Trust me,” he says softly and your heart melts. He reaches a hand up to play with your pussy, fingers gliding around your folds. “I wish you could see this. Everything about you is so pretty, Y/N.”

You could say the same thing about him. There’s something about seeing Taehyun lie there on his back, dark brown hair sticking to his forehead and his big, brown eyes made darker by his dilated pupils that made him look angelic.

“Lower yourself down on my face, good girl.”

Again with the good girl. Does he know he can make you do anything just by calling you that?

You take a deep breath and lower yourself down onto his face and your breathing becomes ragged the moment you feel the flat of his tongue against your pussy.

His hands come up to grip your thighs and hips. You bite your bottom lip to contain your moans as Taehyun goes to work on your pussy, tongue sliding in and around your folds and the ridge of his nose bumping against your clit. It feels so good, better than you ever could have imagined.

You feel his tongue slide into your pussy and your hands fly to the headboard, gripping tightly as you gasp and moan.

“Fuck, Taehyun…!” you exclaim. He moans against your pussy and the vibrations push you closer to the edge. As he makes out with your pussy from this position, it’s so impossible to hold back. You carefully grind yourself against his tongue and before you know it, you’re seeing stars as your back arches and you cum hard, thighs trembling and hips rocking back and forth at a steady rhythm as you ride out your orgasm.

“S-Sorry!” you stammer as you lift your hips to allow Taehyun to come up for air, but you’re shocked when he pulls your hips back down and gives your core a few long licks and swirls his tongue around your clit. Your thighs clench and you whimper from the overstimulation. When he finally taps your thighs to indicate that he’s done, you pull off of him, straddling his waist.

“You taste so fucking good, my love,” he mumbles, chest heaving as he looks at you with half lidded eyes and the bottom half of his face wet and shimmering from your juices. He looks so fucked out, like he was the one who was just eaten out like a man starved. “You put every fruit on this planet to shame.”

"Stop, you're making me blush," you say with a shy chuckle.

"Don't get shy now, you were just riding my face a few second ago." You both laugh and Taehyun sits up and rests his hands on your soft waist. He gives you the softest smile and looking up at you with those beautiful brown eyes and that's when it hits you.

You love this man, much more than words could ever describe.

You wrap your arms around his neck and bury your face in the crook of his neck.

"I love you," Taehyun whispers into your skin and holds you tighter. You melt into his embrace, never wanting to leave from his arms or this moment. You wish you could live in his arms.

It's not until both you and Taehyun's stomachs start growling that the moment is ruined. You pull away from the embrace and look at each other with wide eyes and erupt into laughter.

"Guess we should get something to eat, huh?" Taehyun asks.

"Yeah, I guess so," you say, still giggling.

"Why don't I go run us a bath and you order our meal for tonight?"

"Sounds good to me."

You part with a kiss and, even though he's just in the next room over, you're so overcome with love for him. You get teary eyed as you browse your go-to delivery app.

In that moment, you're so thankful for his love, thankful you have each other.

[jackmanbj]

single

AN: this is my first angst fic, enjoy, also this has two parts.🫀

summary: jack has been telling you to wait for him to be ready in a real relationship but likes to fuck other girls and gets mad when you talk to another dude.

you and jack had just got back to the hotel after his performance.

jack was beyond exhausted, he just wanted to lay down in your arms and fall asleep to you whispering sweet nothings in his ear.

jack got into the shower with you following behind him.

“jackie, when are you going to commit to me..?”

“baby please, you known i love you, we can talk about this tomorrow im so fucking tired i can barely stand up..”

“ok baby i dont want to stress you, lets just go to bed, ok.”

you both finished washing off and went to lay down.

you laid on the bed while jack climbed on top of you.

jack didnt take long to fall asleep, you sighed feeling lonely, sure you were seeing jack, but it didnt feel like it.

jack would go out to clubs every other night and be kissing girls, hell sometimes maybe even fucking them, you never knew when it came to him.

you let your mind shut off as you fell asleep scratching jacks hair with your acrylic nails.

the next morning by the time you woke up, jack was gone.

you sighed and checked the time before getting up and heading to brush your teeth.

you found jacks dirty clothes on the floor by his bag, you picked then up getting a plastic bag and placing them in until you could wash them.

you heard your phone ringing and went to go answer it.

*incoming call from stinka💕*

you answered and heard urban in the background taking to what sounded like ace.

“yea jack?”

“im so sorry i left before you could wake up, the boys wanted to go out and i didnt want to wake you, i just wanted to call and let you know where i was.”

“its fine babe, have fun”

“thank you mamas, love you.”

“love to too.”

jack hung up and started cuddling up to the girl who obviously knew he was talking to someone, but didnt care as he talked to his friends.

“dude you gotta either commit to y/n or break it off with her, you’ve been leading her on for the longest.”

“urban just give me time.. i want her i just dont know when i want to commit.”

“their is no way you want her honestly, you have been with two other girls since the one from last night!”

“fuck i just need time, im going see y/n.”

urban looked at jack with nothing but disappointment, jack had always claimed he didnt like toxic relationships, he just wanted one girl to love on forever.

it was all for an image, jack wanted anybody who would fuck him.

jack loved you though, he knew he loved you, you knew he loved you, hell everybody knew.

well everybody who wasn’t the public.

jack didnt hide the fact he was actively going in and out of relationships or getting ready to commit.

he loved the attention he would get from women wanting to get under your skin, even if they didnt know you, they wanted you to know jack was cheating on you and he loved the adrenaline it gave him, hell if it was up to him he would date you in an one way open relationship, he could fuck whoever while your the house wife of the decade.

jack pulled up to the hotel and went in to find a not with your handwriting on the island that said

“im going treat myself, i went to get my hair done, nails done, and i might go to hang out at a club or something. i dont know if you’re going to be back before me so i wrote this. love you lots see you later.”

jack sighed knowing you probably took his card and there would be a lot less money from before.

jack called you and it went straight to voicemail, he went to text you and seen you were ok dnd, he texted you and pressed noti anyway.

stinka💕- call me back love

you huffed and looked at the message and seen jacks name, you were getting your toes done so your hands were free and you called him back.

“yes babe?”

“did you take my cards?”

“yea, of course.”

“you didnt even ask me what the fuck.”

“jack baby, i just wanted to have time to myself, all i did was get my nails done so far, i can cancel everything else if its that big of a deal.”

“its fine i just..never mind, have a good day my girl, enjoy yourself.”

“thank you jack.”

you finished your nails and went to the store to grab some snacks for while you get your hair done.

while you were in the store a man with freeform’s approached you

“hey ma’am you mind if i pay for your things?”

“uhm thanks but you dont have to really!”

“please?”

“yes sure, thanks so much.”

“no problem.”

the man paid and as you were walking out he stopped you again.

“hey uhm, i was wondering.. can i have your number.”

“yes sure.”

the man quickly took out his phone and saved his number as ‘Warren’

you took your phone back and headed out the store walking to your car getting ready for the appointment.

you started driving and jack called you.

you answered the phone through the car screen not wanting to pick up your phone.

“yes jack? im driving, cant really talk.”

“why were you at the store so long? you ok?”

“yes im fine this dude asked yo pay for my things thats all.”

“did you let him?”

“yes why wouldn’t i?”

“man what the fuck? your out with my card and letting another man buy your shit? i bet he was just trying to get your number.”

“her put his number in my phone, im probably just going to be his friend dont want to lead him on.”

jack didnt say another word, he just hung up and your music started blasting.

you knew the phone didn’t disconnect because jack let out a puff before hanging up.

once you were done with all your appointments and having your day out you went back to the hotel with a few shopping bags hanging on your arm as you sucked your strawberry smoothie.

you dropped your bags off on the island and went to the bedroom ready to show off your hair and nails and make it up to jack.

when you walked in jack was making out with another girl who simply smiled at you before rubbing jack through his pants.

usually you had the mindset “its almost never the secret girls fault, if she didn’t know. if she did, beat that hoe ass.”

and thats what you did.

you set your smoothie down acting calm and went to the bathroom.

jack not knowing what you were going to do, he continued wanting to get under your skin.

you walked out the bathroom with your hair in a bun and immediately ran to punch the girl in the face.

she tried her hardest to fight back while you just were beating on her.

jack let you get your anger out on her so it wouldn’t be as bad on him but after about forty seconds he pulled you off, she girl not wanting to fight back.

jack told the girl get out while holding you to his chest.

“what no! you love me! you told me that jack!!”

“ok i lied, get out. i have to take care of my little princess.”

“fine.” she tried to put her clothes on but you picked up her shirt and got out of jacks grip, she ran after you for her shirt and you threw it out the door.

“fetch.”

the girl groaned and put her shirt on in the hall and waited for jack to bring her phone ect out.

jack placed it into your hands to give to her and you threw her things on the ground.

you slammed the door and all your anger now went towards jack.

you started walking up to him and were about to punch his face but he caught your arm.

you couldn’t help but get so mad to the point you cried, you were sick of getting treated like this, you were sick of getting humiliated, sick of jack saying “i loved you” to three different people other then you in one day.

jack pulled you to his chest and let you cling to his while you let it all out.

jack led you to the bedroom as you stopped crying.

“i love you baby..”

“no you dont.”

“if i didn’t i wouldn’t be with you, i love you.. just need time to express it and get ready to commit because i only want you.”

“jack i cant do this, im getting a plane ticket home for tomorrow, im not moving out but ill be in the guest room, until you can prove to me that you love me and stop bring all these women in your life. i cant, i love you but i cant.”

you started packing your things while jack couldn’t help but watch and cry.

he did love you.

but he loved to many other people to commit to you.

you left the room not sure where else to go except urbans room.

urban let you in with warm hugs and let you stay in the main room while he took the sofa.

you flew back the next day and jack wouldn’t stop texting you.

stinka💕- text me when you get home love, have a safe flight.

stinka💕- its been 4 hours, i know your home call me please.

stinka💕- mamas, i know you’re extremely upset with me and so exhausted because of everything i’ve put you through this year, but i love you. even if i cant show it right now, ma i love you. you know i do, i’ll be better for you i promise i will but i need you to call me so i know your safe, or text me even just a period. something please i need to know your okay. i know i messed up but i need you.

you- im fine jackman.

you turned your phone on dnd and laid down and started to watch childhood shows.

there was a knock at the front door, you took the blanket off yourself and went up to look out the window.

there was no one but flowers on the floor.

you huffed and went to get the flowers already knowing who sent them.

you put the flowers in a empty vase and read the note.

“y/n, i love you so much you dont even know. im so sorry for all the pain i’ve caused you, i just want you to forgive me. i’ll change my ways all the way, i want you to be happy and i haven’t been making you happy its my fault, instead of talking things out with you i go see other women and leave you alone to sleep by yourself, i’ll see you soon though my love♥️”

you kissed the note and brought it to your bedroom and put it on your nightstand.

you took your phone off dnd and called jack.

jack answered on the first ring and you immediately heard a sniffle when he answered.

“jack baby are you crying?”

“no.”

“jack baby face time me.”

jack pressed the face time button after wiping his face trying to look as presentable as possible.

you answered and could immediately tell he had been crying.

“jack babe, dont cry. i love you so much you’re stuck with me. you just have to stop acting the way you are, its hurting me really bad and its pushing me from you.”

“i promise to stop, mamas i need you..”

“ok babe, its not very smart for me to fly back out right now because i just left so maybe in like a week ill come back.”

“what no, come back tomorrow im getting your ticket right now.”

“jack-“

“i already brought it, you’re coming.”

“alright babe..”

“no ones going to get in the way of us anymore, we’re together forever. i love you.”

“forever and always?”

“forever and always, but you need some rest, goodnight my love the flights for 7:30.”

“ok goodnight jackie.”

jack hung up and cuddled with his pillow wishing it was you.

[yourneighborlyweirdo]

Tarot 🤝🏼 Shifting

This isn’t really a post that I usually make with all the big headings and special symbols, and that’s because I just got my nails done (love them btw) and I just popped an advil so I’m hella tired, but I just wanted to put this out there…

I usually use my tarot deck to ask a big main question I have, and then once it’s answered I put my deck away until I need it again, (which there’s nothing wrong with that) but I just did an actual reading which I haven’t done in a while and I asked multiple questions leading into other questions, like “What do you need to tell me?” “What is something I need to improve on in my journey?” “What can I do to start doing that thing to improve?” And etc, and instead of pulling only one card each question I got 2-4 which gave me a clearer answer on my questions, and it helped me connect the dots a lot more.

Just made this post to say,

• If you have a tarot deck, and you usually barely do any readings, I would recommend you start doing it more often because I can’t stress the amount of clarity I got because I only ever pull one card for one simple question and feel confused because I don’t see why the card answers my question, so when I asked more smaller and simplified questions leading into eachother, it helped me understand a lot more!

• If your a witch/spiritual person (like me) who’s also into shifting, I highly recommend to start intertwining them into each other instead of treating it like they are separate things (they are separate but go under the same category/umbrella for Spiritual stuff)

• Use your divination tools (like your tarot deck if you have one) more often because they are so so useful.

• This reminded me that everyone’s journey is different because everyone is different so getting advice personalized for me and myself made me feel so much better because now I know how I can improve on certain things!

Sorry if this post is annoying or going over shit everyone already knows, I just wanted to share that when I did this reading I got so much clarity and advice and I realized what I was doing wrong, what I was missing, what I can do to improve, and so much more, and I might just make a big long post going over this because I got some advice I’ve known before but it was explained to me in which a way helps me understand a lot better (because I asked MY tarot cards about MY journey) and yeah. Highly recommend tarot cards for divination, especially shifting related.

Shifting is different for everyone. Everyone’s spiritual journey is different. Remember that, because like many, I keep forgetting.

Sincerely,

Your Neighborly Weirdo

[sissytrapjamie]

If the conventional forms of conversion therapy aren't working, why not fall back on some good old fashioned reverse psychology? Okay, fine, I really wanna be this insulting caricature of a woman, force me to be just that. But treat me accordingly.

Force me into the most excessive, embarassing maid outfit and never let me wear anything else. After all, I seem to have an old timey housewife servant in my head as my idea of what a woman is, don't I? Make me clean all over, nothing short of spotless is acceptable. From time to time, wait until I'm just about done and deliberately make a massive mess in front of me to set me back another hour or two. Refuse to provide me with a mop and make me use my long pretty hair instead. It'll feel more and more revolting against my body until I crack and beg to have it buzzed off. One step closer. Maybe even put it on a stick and make me continue to mop with it to taunt me.

As I'm spending my life trying vainly to keep a house to impossible standards, that's not all. My twisted idea of a woman has to look her best at all times, right? Make up must be immaculate, all 20 nails perfectly manicured and pedicured, long hair perfectly styled until I ask so sweetly to me liberated of it. If I should get so much as a blemish, I have to drop what I'm doing and fix my appearance, however long it takes. And I'd not be provided with cleaning gloves, so my nails would be chipping several times a day. Even the simplest tasks become that much more soul destroying, and I can't help resenting feminine presentation as a whole.

Needless to say, I'd need keeping in line, there's no way I'd agree to all this on my own. Infractions could be punished with beatings, some forced anal/pegging to make me hate that too, reduced sleep to make me even more likely to fuck up the next day. Sooner or later I'd snap and lose my temper, which is the perfect time to blindside me with praise, what a good boy I am, getting back in touch with my masculine instincts, but regrettably, this can't go unpunished, either. Maybe I'd reach a point of physically fighting back like such a good boy, making a stand, getting so big and strong now.

And to my surprise, you're right. Weeks or months of body breaking housework all day every day has whipped me into peak physical shape when I wasn't looking. I could carry on with this misery for another few months, or leave it all behind. Let my appearance go so I still look after myself, but it's easy, just a little bit of grooming. I'll be free now, everything is my choice. I could never touch a duster again and be a misogynist, or use what I've learned to become a domestic superman, the ladies would love that, I'd be a real keeper. And it'd be so easy with attainable, possible standards. Gift me a gym membership and I can do any training I want to build myself in any kind of way. I'll stop the hormones keeping me from my full potential, and I wouldn't have to be scared in the street anymore, no one would wanna fuck with the new me. Able to protect those I care about, like a man should.

The possibilities are really endless, now I'm not forcing myself into what I think a woman is, I can be any kind of man.

Another confused man successfully rehabilitated.

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

as someone who only just watched bullet train and wanted to find tangerine stuff, i was SO worried i was gonna be getting myself into a dead fandom but so happy to find your works😭😭💕💕 Could i request tan with an innocent reader who doesn’t get any of his innuendos or dirty jokes and sometimes scolds him for his bad language?<33

hii!! thats so so sweet, I and many others have got lots for you to read, so no worries!! and I absolutely love it! thank you for requesting, hope you like it💌

potty mouth

tangerine x f reader

wc || 0.7

warnings || lots of swearing, bc duh it’s tan😭

a/n || had this in my drafts

masterlist + rules

taglist

Tangerine had the mouth of a sailor, there was no doubt about that. He would constantly spew strings of curses anywhere and everywhere he went.

Throughout your relationship with him, you have learned a few new curses, some you had no idea were even a thing. But with Tan’s cockney tongue, you’ve grown quite accustomed to his rather crude vocabulary.

“Ah, you fuckin bellend.” He hisses, forcefully placing the kettle back on its spot. “Twat.”

“What happened?” You ask, looking over your laptop from the dining table.

“Fuckin water splashed up, didn’t it.” Angrily dropping a spoon into the sink.

“Fiver.” You nod, keeping your eyes on your screen. “Five quid in the jar.”

“Oh get fucked.” He chuckles, sliding your cup of tea across the table to you.

You smugly grin. “Oh, that’s definitely two more, pop in seven. Keep going like that and I can my nails done.” Hiding a giggle as you reach for your mug, raising it to take a sip.

Laughing. “Dick.”

Making a playful expression, eyes blown wide as you gasp. “I’m definitely going to get my nails done at this rate.”

“Shut up.” Grinning as looks over at your screen, clearly trying to distract you. “What you working on?”

“Yeah, nice try. Gimme.” You smile, extending your hand.

“I thought it goes in the jar? Hm?” Hiding a smirk as he reaches into his pocket, pulling out a few notes before laying them in your hand.

“It’s also known as ‘my purse’ … that’s sixty?” Head cocking as you looked at him.

“Yeah, so you can get colours on your nails, or whatever you get.” Acting coy, as if he didn’t know any of the lingo.

“No-no. I was just kidding.” Sliding the money along the table.

He nods warmly, wryly smiling as he did so. “I wasn’t… keep it, treat yourself.”

“Now I feel bad.”

“Good, you should do. You just robbed me sixty quid.” Pretending to look offended as he stands. Nodding into the other room. “Come watch tv with me, I’m bored.”

“Sod off.” Snickering as you closed your laptop, taking his hand as he leads you into the living room.

Faking a gasp as he turned around. “That’s two pounds, that. I’ll make a jar for you, hypocrite.”

“Yeah, I’m sure that’s the same as the ones you say.” Laughing earnestly as you slump into the sofa beside him.

“I suppose I can let you off.”

You snuggled into his side, looking up at him with a sarcastic expression. “That’s so kind, thank you.”

“I guess it’s alright.“ Grinning as he picked up the tv controller, flicking through the channels. “What would a perverted frog say?” He asks practically out of nowhere, his gaze fixed on the tv. “Rubbit.”

“Uh—?” Head tilting to the side in confusion. Brows furrowing as your mind worked wonders to decipher what he meant.

He lowers his head, nodding slow as a way to prompt you to understand. Noticing your confused furrowed brows, he slowly adds. “Rubbit— rub it.”

“Oh, you are disgusting.” Hiding a snicker as you gently slap his chest.

You’d never hit him with any malice, it would always be a gentle love tap. You didn’t want him to feel like a child being reprimanded by his mother, so you always made sure to do it lovingly and playfully. Tangerine is the kind of guy who is naturally cheeky and charming, so much so, that his dirty innuendos usually fly over your head.

“What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?”

“I don’t know, what do you call a lesbian dinosaur?” You ask, entertaining him.

“Lickalotapus.”

“Are you done?” Stifling your laughter as you pretend to look displeased.

“Nah, I got a few more… what’s the difference between pink and purple? … the grip.”

“Alright, you know what?” Giving his arm a quick harmless tap. “Where’d you even learn these?”

“Lem, he taught me when we were kids.”

“Liar… there’s no way, that he taught you.”

“Is that a compliment?”

“Not particularly, no.” Suppressing a laugh as you turned your attention back to the tv. “Fancy watching Thomas?” You asked, playfully provoking him.

“Fuck off am I watching that… yeah, yeah I know.” Scoffing as he reached into his pocket, immediately noticing your quirked brow. “You’re gonna be effing minted, aren’t ya?”

Smiling sincerely as you snatched the pounds from his hand. “That depends on you.”

@tangerinesgf @kpopgirlbtssvt @ch3rries-n-cream @earth-elemental18 @ashlynhasmanyhyperfixations @idontknowwhattohaveasmyuser @thewinterv @navs-bhat @ilovetangerinewithallmyheart @theredvelvetbitch @randomawesomeperson102 @lov3lypeaches7 @princess-pebbles-things