#getting easier
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I don’t even know what I want to say Feeling stupid
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I think that soon I'll become softer
I'll be kinder to myself
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bad dating stories time: the shoe incident
so in highschool, my best friend wasnt allowed to go on dates unless there was another couple there to keep an eye on him. part of this was his parents being insane, but also, part of it was him being insane. in a problem with no reasonable parties, there are no reasonable solutions.
at some point in my junior year, my sorta-gf broke up with me, and i just wasnt feeling dating, which was bad for my friend, because he had a good thing going with a girl he met in court.
he kind of hounded me about it. kept pushing me to just put me feet back in the dating pool and i wasnt real thrilled about it, because i knew he was pushing me for his own benefit, not mine, so i kept telling him to fuck off, and after a few weeks of being told that i would date when i was damn well ready, he eventually said: okay. what if i paid for the date AND found you a blind date AND all you had to do was show up?
and i shouldve said no, i know, but i let him wear me down, and i will own my fault in that. a date starting on such a stupid premise could never have gone well.
but he still managed to find a way to make it worse.
i dont know how long he tried to set a blind date up. it couldve been multiple attempts. he couldve stooped to this immediately. but what happened in the end was that he called a girl from the ward he attended - a girl that he knew had a giant, mushy crush on him - and he said: hey! how would you feel about going on a date this weekend?
(you know, implying it was with him, but never actually saying it.)
and she said YES WOW I WOULD LOVE TO and he said great! and then he called me up and said he found me a date.
i did not learn about his crimes until several weeks later. i will die swearing before god almighty that i would never have allowed this travesty to happen if i had known.
that was on a monday. the date of the date rolled around that friday evening, and im sorry to confess, i really phoned the whole thing in. i showed up in my favorite comfy outfit, which was also a fashion crime: basketball shorts and flipflops and a baja hoodie. it was super comfy but it made me look kind of crazy. i picked him up first, and then i picked up his date next, and then we went to pick up my date, and thats where you're gonna get the play by play.
i arrived, walked across the yard, and knocked on the front door. she opened it almost immediately, like shed been waiting right by it, and i could see her expression go from OMG IM SO EXCITED to super disappointed, then disgusted and finally pissed. and because i didn't know about my friends sins, i thought it was from my outfit. which seemed... harsh. like, hey, im allowed to be quirky, fuck you. also its a blind date, i thought the deal was that we were both going to be sad broken sacks of mortality.
anyway, we looked at each other for several seconds before she slammed the door in my face.
i looked back at my friend. he was sweating bullets. i dont know what he expected from this, but there was this big long pause where we both tried to figure out what to do, and then the door opened up, and her dad invited me in, and he said she was gonna need a few minutes to finish getting ready, and that in the meantime we could sit and talk.
we did not talk. we did sit. i sat down on the couch, and he sat down in a chair across the couch, and then instead of talking he cleaned his pistol on the coffee table. i wasnt actually sure if it was a threat, or if it was just a fidget thing for 40+ year old republican men, but when i tried to help he got snappy so i just watched him put a pistol back together.
he was okay at it.
eventually my date came downstairs, still mad as hell for reasons beyond my ken, and i felt pretty guilty for being such a mess because i thought that was why she was so angry. i tried to make up for by walking her to the car and getting the door for her, just generally trying to be extra polite, but before i could make it back to the drivers side, her dad called me back to the door. so i flipped around, went to the door, and immediately regreted my decision.
soon as i was within range, her dad got waaaay too close to me, leaned in, and said "whatever you do to her, i will do to you," and my brain went into overdrive making three consecutive realizations.
realization one was, damn, the pistol thing was a threat. that sucks. what an asshole. realization two was, wait, im autistic and even i know theres a 0% chance me and my date even hold hands, least of all boink. does this guy actually think there's even a 1% chance of anyone in that car getting laid tonight? is he an idiot? and then realization three went through, which was wait, is this guy threatening to fuck me? and unfortunately, with my brain doing so much processing, my mouth was left to run amok, so somewhere between realization 2 and 3, i said:
"i can't get pregnant"
which, i swear, wasn't actually me trying to be a smartass, it was just me pointing out that he couldn't actually follow up on that threat. it just wasn't possible. we do not live in the omegaverse and im not scared of you.
still, it was an insanely catastrophic thing to say, and the moment we both heard it, we bluescreened. that single sentence obliterated both of our momentary streams of consciousness like a saltine in front of a sand blaster. problem was, he'd probably gone his whole life not even realizing someone could say something that stupid, and making that realization was going to cost him a lot of thinking time. me though? i had been saying shit like that for 17 years, i didnt have to rewrite my expectations of human nature, i just had to plan an exit and start striding. so i was already halfway back to the car before i heard "hey. hey come back. Hey. Hey. HEY. HEY WAIT. HEY GET BACK HERE. HEY-"
and then i was in my car, and i drove away.
if this happened today, he'd have called her, and the whole thing wouldve imploded then and there, but back then, there were still a decent number of teenagers without cell phones. especially the teenagers of insane, gun toting parents. so she just said: whoa what was that all about? and i said: dont worry about it, he'll tell you about it when you get home.
and she said: ok and went back to staring daggers at me and my friend.
WHICH SURPRISINGLY isnt even how the story ends.
we went to an improv comedy show, and it was a disaster. it shouldve been like, 7/10 tops, but between my date being mad, and my friend having a good time, and me having the existential terror of knowing that a guy with a pistol was probably waiting outside his house for me to come back, it was easily 11/10. i laughed way too hard at everything. especially the jokes that flopped. id sit there in this mostly silent room and laugh until i dry heaved a little, and my date was absolutely disgusted, and even my friend was a little embarrassed, which would just make me laugh harder. i laughed so hard that night i could barely talk the next day. and then the show ended, and my friend said, you know, that was a good time, but i think we should maybe do something a little chiller? who wants to walk around the park? and his date said yeah, and my date said no, and i finally had mercy on the poor woman so i said, look, im gonna drop you off. and i am so, so sorry about this, but im dropping you off like a block away. super duper sorry.
do talk to your dad about the pistols thing if you dont want this happening more in the future tho.
and she said: okay. so i dropped her off, and she walked a block down, and that was that.
then i drove my friend and his date to a park that was good for wandering. i figured they wanted something more private, so instead of following them around point blank, i chose a park with this 30 foot rope tower, and i climbed to the top and i said: hey i can see you anywhere from up here, you are officially chaperoned from a distance. get panopticoned idiot. except my friend really is an idiot, and he didnt really get the whole 'now i dont have to third wheel so insanely hard with you guys' thing so he climbed up the tower too, and then his date followed behind him, so there are three people basically sitting together on top of a telephone pole.
and then they started making out.
i was close enough to hear it.
i didnt really know what to do so i was just kind of sitting there, dissociating, when some college kids came around and started shaking the tower. my friend's date went aaaaaaaaaa im afraid of heights :( and my friend went oh, dont worry, ill hold you tight ;) and i went hey, im gonna climb down and ask them to stop.
so i did climb down, and i did ask them to stop, and they flipped me off, which i wasnt even mad about. at that point i was i was like yeah, it would be weirder if this wasnt a mess. gods plan has been to fly this day like a 747 into my metaphorical twin towers and brother he is close enough for me to see him grinning through the cockpit window. still, eventually the college students got bored, so they climbed up the tower, which gave my friend and his date a window to climb down, and together we walked back to my car.
now, i cant explain why this is, but sitting back in the drivers seat was my carriage-back-into-a-pumpkin moment. i'd been chill about all the chaos, just rolling with the punches, but sitting down made me realize how much of a shitshow the day had been, and while i couldnt go back and fix all of it, i could go back and fix one thing.
so i told my friend and his date, hey, you two, stay here and don't do anything weird. don't. then i walked back to the rope tower, and i started picking up the shoes the college students had left at the base in order to climb.
about halfway through this, i realized that if i took all their shoes, they might think i was in it for the money, and i actually wanted them to know i was in it specifically to spite them. fuck those guys. so i put all the right shoes back, gave myself a 100 foot headstart, yelled "nice shoes, assholes", did a little jig, and started running.
my advice to everyone is that college students are faster than you think. even with the headstart, and the whole climb down the tower thing, i was still only fivish seconds ahead of them by the time i got to my car. i flung the door open, looked in the backseat, didnt see anyone, flung the stolen shoes in the backseat, heard two "ow"s, took that as proof of presence, jumped in and pealed out of the lot.
my friend and his date popped up a few seconds later. they were, uh, doing something weird in the back seat. my one request - obliterated.
they climbed up to ask where the hell all the shoes had come from, and i was like yeah i stole them from the college students, and they were like oh. cool. hope you had fun. and i was like, i did. i did. but speaking of fun, what were you doing back there?
and for the first time in my buddies life, i think he was actually embarassed.
#dating stories#anecdotes#long post#funny story#babylon#im really bad at dating#like i can do a lot better than this but also it just was kind of a nightmare for me#shit like this did make the whole thing easier tho#like#every date after this i could go you know ive seen how bad it can get#and i lived#didnt even get shot#writing
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so when straight people ask me why I say I’m “queer” or “gay” instead of sharing my actual identity as a panromantic demisexual non-binary sapphic queer I just tell them “ok look, when you’re talking to someone who isn’t local and they ask you where you’re from and you either say the name of the largest city nearby or ‘town name, suburb of large nearby city’ so they can get some geographical context of where you’re located right, bc they’re probably not going to know the name of the little town you actually live in.”
but if you’re talking to a local you can say the name of your actual town bc they have a greater chance of knowing where/what that is.
ok well when I’m talking to a straight person I start with queer bc chances are they aren’t as familiar with the context of all the little towns in that big queer city and need gps (gay positioning system) to find me.
if I’m talking to another queer person and I say I live in a suburb of gay city in a town called panromantic on the demisexual side of the tracks which is in the county of queer and I live off the intersection of non-binary and sapphic, they’d probably be able to find me with little to no problems, make sense?
#personal rant lol#like saying queer or gay is so much easier sometimes#if I say anything else sometimes I get the confused dog head tilt and I’m just like ok ok I’m gay#lgbtq community#lgbtqia#demisexual#non binary#sapphic#lgbtqia+#queer#panromantic
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Bruce, for the record, is absolutely stoked when Jason brings Roy around.
Because this now means that he is a grandpa. He is so ready to be a grandpa. Let him be a grandpa. Please please please please-
(finally, he gets to just give things to someone. anything they want. (finally, he gets to give Jason so much money and things and Jason can't say no because they are for Lian too))
The thing is, now he is in a very deep and serious rivalry with Oliver, who will not be replaced as the number one grandpa. Absolutely not. So now they are waging war on each other for Lian's affections.
It's messy and it's bloody.
One day, during a JLA meeting, Green Arrow notices something peeking from underneath Batman's suit. It's colorful, so it stands starkly against the dark suit. It looks very familiar.
Green Arrow looks down on his hands. At the friendship bracelet Lian had made for him. He looks back up at Batman and the very familiar colorful thing he has on him.
"What is that?" He asks.
Batman turns to look at him. He follows Green Arrow's gaze, and looks at the colorful thing on him, and then at the bracelet on Green Arrow's wrist.
"What is that?" Batman asks, nodding at the bracelet.
"I asked you first."
"I asked you second."
Green Arrow glares at Batman.
"It's a friendship bracelet my granddaughter made for me", he says.
Batman glares at Green Arrow.
"And this is a friendship bracelet my granddaughter made for me", he says.
They glare at each other. The meeting room has become several degrees colder. No one dares to utter a word.
Then they both pull out their phones and make a call.
"Jason-"
"Roy-"
Jason and Roy, in their bed, both realising that their dad's are calling them at the same time: fuck whatever it is, we're going back to sleep
#this all just FUELS IT even more#because damn it! Oliver is not going to lose to BATMAN of all people#jason and roy meanwhile are pondering which one of them would be easier to get to buy them a house#since all the stuff they are buying Lian is not going to fit into their apartment for much longer#dc#jayroy#batman#bruce wayne#oliver queen#green arrow#jason todd#roy harper#arsenal#red hood
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'what do u want to draw' 'idk, megumi?'
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk megumi#when in doubt . megumi#almost drew more free i was *this* close to a makoto or makoharu sheet u have no idea the effort it took pls applaud my restraint#regardless tho im having lots of fun w this way of doing hair#fr the longest time the heavy chunked layers were always a look tht i could never get right#but i think ive gotten there finally!! or am getting there#it was easier w haru than with megu but ! still pleased#also idk if i will have time to draw anything else before i leave so i rushed a bit 2 get this up#maybe ill have time fr another sketchy doodle in between packing and prep dgsdfj who knows !! i will try tho
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I think my copy of the game is broken they've been doing this for 30 minutes
Crop of the Biolizard edit I did bc it makes me laugh:
#art#sonic the hedgehog#sonic#shadow the hedgehog#rouge the bat#their dynamic is so funny to me like hello what episode of Untucked is this#I am rotating them in a 2 bed 1 bath apartment in my mind#Also very proud of how this turned out I think I'm finally finding a comic rendering style that doesn't make me want to rip my hair out#Simplify baybee it's a comic not an illustration you can get a little crazy with it#Spoiler alert. Getting looser with lineart and better at colour schemes and simplifying shading. Is good actually.#It's so much easier to eyeball what a colour would look like in a setting instead of colourpicking the OG palette and struggling with...#...like 9 overlay and multiply and soft/hard light layers#Approximating colour genuinely looks better than forcing local colour into the piece. As long as the values are still there it works out#comic
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always good to keep a screamhole handy
#danny phantom#danny fenton#college au#ember mclain#this one was a struggle to finish tbh#but the thinking around it is how ghosts handle stress#like#hmm#bc of the way they operate ghosts don’t have human emotional regulation#there is no shoving feelings down#they gotta go OUT#ghost fights and having fun in the ghost zone is usually enough#but in times of big stress sometimes he’s just gotta scream/wail it out#easier to just destress the ghost way yanno#less work#quicker recovery#also in this#displays of power aren’t inherently aggressive but they do affect how much respect you get#he’s just screaming into a mostly uninhabited void#but he’s the ghost king and he wasn’t really thinking#so just like#ghost nukes tf out of this little area#no harm no foul tho
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the thing about trying to recommend fiction podcasts to someone who isn't familiar with them is that not only are so so many genres represented but also the level of production can fall anywhere from "basically an audiobook" to "major motion picture minus the pictures"
#original#idk just something i think about sometimes#you can read a description to get a sense of the genre/plot/vibe but you truly dont know What exactly youre getting into till you listen#with nonfiction podcasts it tends to be easier to get a read on whether its gonna be like. some buddies fucking around with a mic#or more like a whole documentary#or with fiction books there can be different framings but the actual makeup of the thing is almost always the same#idk what im saying at this point i need to stop putting so much bullshit in tags#whatever#audio drama
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You know what's fun?
They seem to have made Percy more on the inattentive end of ADHD than hyperactive. Aside from the capture the flag scene, we mostly just see him zoning out, 'daydreaming', the line "I don't think it's the marshmallow's fault I never pay attention".
ADHD barely gets good representation as it is, but I don't think I've ever seen the inattentive type in media like this before. This is going to be huge for a lot of people who don't fall under the hyperactive stereotype umbrella.
I'm just really excited that more people will get the chance to see themselves.
#percy jackson#I'm actually combined type so this doesn't fully apply to me#But y'all inattentives arguably get the short end of the stick a lot of the time#So I'm genuinely thrilled for you#and that they went this direction#especially since hyperactive is probably easier to portray as adhd and have the audience get it#percy jackon and the olympians#adhd
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crisis of disbelief
#one piece#trafalgar law#zoro#luffy#‘what ship is this’ sure#lulaw? luzo? law…zo? or is it zolaw. none of these sound like words anymore#well i guess bc they aren’t. they aren’t real words#‘law and zoro never really saw gear 5’ yeah. law saw his giant head in the roof and zoro was basically dead#they felt That tho#and finally#‘i thought you were taking a much needed rest break after weekly comics’#yeah well. i need a new brush bc my old one kills my wrist and there is a STEEP learning curve for me ://#it’ll get easier right. it’ll look better right. RIGHT?!
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when you're part of a group with structural power over another goup, you really do gotta just learn to say "i am not exempt from 'fuck 'em' when relevant" whenever someone expresses frustration with you or people like you.
#juney.txt#like sure to protect your ego you could try to make up some axis of oppression that concievably means you're not accountable for anything#and how dare people from colonized nations tell you that you have it easier than them just because you live in the imperial core#or how dare trans women say you have it easier than them because no matter what it'll always be your word against a tranny's#or you could just learn to be a little uncomfortable for a moment#and look at the situation for a second and say#''you know what? they're right to be frustrated!''#''and it's really not that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things if they're frustrated at me''#''especially if i'm being a prime example of the things they're getting frustrated about''#''i am not exempt from 'fuck 'em' when relevant''
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[ does it ever get easier? ] - signed from mm! link
Ask Meme -- @shathyar
Link's eyes tick to the other's face. Well, that's not a good sign. From the look of the other guy, he's been doing "it" for a long time. And Link doesn't want to think too much about what "it" might be, otherwise he's almost certainly going to feel very depressed about it.
Flat left hand waves underneath his arm, mouth a slight grimace. << Not yet. >> Although Link has at least gotten stronger since he woke up the first time... and the second time, even if he is still getting used to his new arm after the second time.
#shathyar#mute courage || link#getting easier#rip =']#if mm link is doing bad then totk link is doing worse
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for true story
now available as a print!
#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#oh my god i finally finished this piece#i started this almost a month ago but kept get waylaid by other work#very pleased with how this one came out hehe#shout out devin elle kurtz for her city brushes#they made the background so much easier#sonic adventure 2#sa2#sonic x shadow generations
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i need well meaning cis people to stop attemping to steelman trans healthcare conversations because it basically always ends with them just lying about easily checkable things "no minors are getting irreversible treatments" wrong not true "no minors are having surgery" also false, like instead just say the truth: currently some minors (few, but some) are able to access hrt that will have some irreversible changes on their body, some (even fewer) minors are able to access surgery.
the counter to transphobes screaming "these kids are being irreversibly changed" isn't "no children are accessing this care" it's "puberty is also an irreversible change" and "i think under 18s and even under 16s should be able to make medical decisions actually"
"no minors are accessing this care" means that transphobes can easily point to the examples of minors who are accessing that care, which just make us look like liars. sometimes teenagers and children need to make medical choices on their own. i think a 14 y/o should be able to get an abortion. i think trans kids and teens should be able to have the approriate care, which for some will just be like, picking a new name or haircut, and for some, sure, could be surgery.
#*m#so many journalists / youtubers / podcasters try to defend trans people but just like. say this shit that is basically a lie#i get why i get it's an easier convo to have but actually having the hard conversation is really fucking important.#not for the transphobes those people are fucked but like. for the well meaning libs who listen to x news piece or x podcast u know
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just imagine
percy and annabeth in their 40s having teenagers.
3 to 4 hyper, witty, extremely intelligent teenagers. with powers.
imagine them all stuffed into the car for long roads trips since they can’t fly. imagine them in a heated match of pool volleyball. imagine them on opposing sides of capture the flag at camp
oh gods…imagine family game night
#AHHHH#i hope percy and annabeth have good insurance cause things are getting destroyed#percy and annabeth’s biggest challenge yet: parenting teenagers#you think they ever… like… think tartarus was easier?#no no i shouldn’t say that#(but secretly?)#percababies#percabeth babies#percabeth#percy jackson#annabeth chase#heroes of olympus#percy jackson and the olympians#pjo
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