#getting back to reading fanfic after finally finishing school

[finelinefae]

my darling

synopsis: a love triangle

word count: 10.8k

contains: angst angst angst, love triangle, mfm, best friends to lovers, boarding school, violence, unrequited love,

a/n: i wrote this for wattpad during the My Policeman era. I wanted to post it here after re-reading it. I remember this being one of the first pieces of fanfic i felt super proud of !! warning it is pretty sad

. . .

Then — 1996

Dear Diary,

Today we moved into our new home in Halton. It’s small, quaint, and quiet—very quiet. The kind of place where everyone seems set in their routines, the same patterns repeating every day. I already miss London. Mum says this will be good for us, though. Good to get away from the drama. Good to get away from Dad.

The house isn’t as big as our old one. I have to share a room with Delilah now, but it’s fine—I’ll be off to boarding school by the end of the summer. Mum says I’ll enjoy it since she went to the same school at my age, but I think she’s just trying to make me feel better. Who actually enjoys living at school?

It’s a three-hour drive from Halton, which feels like a world away. I’m nervous, excited, sad, and happy all at once. The feelings are so overwhelming they all blur together into something I can only describe as... heavy. Like my life is a snow globe someone’s just shaken up, glitter falling everywhere. It looks magical at first, but the reality is you’re stuck cleaning it up for weeks, finding it in the oddest places long after.

I miss my dog. I never got to say goodbye.

Dad cried when we left. I’ve never seen him cry before. He told me it wasn’t goodbye, just a "see you later." Mum always says Dad’s a good liar, but I don’t think he was lying this time. Maybe it was the tears—they don’t suit him.

-

Dear Diary,

Today I moved into my dorm at Southend Park School.

Mum was annoyed we had to wake up before seven to pack the car and drive me down, even though this was all her idea. She’s probably just tired—or maybe something else. I have a suspicion she’s met someone. I’m not sure how she moved on from Dad so quickly. Did she ever really love him?

My dorm has six girls, including me. I’ve mostly been talking to Ellis, who’s in the room next door. She’s fourteen, older than the rest of us, but only because her birthday is the 1st of September. Today’s the third, so her advantage is technical, but she likes to remind us.

Being alone here scares me, but it’s nothing new. Delilah always had loads of friends, and Dad was always working. Mum was usually out socializing, too.

Mum cried as we finished unpacking, promising she’d pick me up for half-term or that I could come home anytime. But I don’t want to go home. I hate it there.

Tomorrow is a full day of inductions, and I’m worried about making friends. Southend Park is a mixed school, and boys make me nervous. I’d rather have no friends at all than feel like I have to pretend to be someone I’m not.

I still feel like I’m picking up glitter from months ago. I wonder when it will finally stop.

-

Dear Diary,

I made two friends. You’ll never guess—they’re boys!

Their names are Harry and Dylan. They’re both thirteen, like me, but they feel older somehow. They even live in the same dorm and invited me over this weekend.

We met during lunch in the courtyard. I was sitting alone when Dylan walked up first, chatting easily and cracking jokes. Harry followed behind, much quieter. Dylan has blond hair and a small scar on his eyebrow from climbing trees back in Morston. Harry’s hair is thick and curly—I wanted to touch it but stopped myself because, well, that would’ve been weird.

Harry didn’t say much at first, though I noticed him glancing at me. When I met his gaze, he blushed and looked down at his extra-polished school shoes.

We didn’t talk much again until the end of the day, on the way back to the dorms. That’s when we compared timetables and realized we share four classes, including English Literature. It’s just Harry and me in that one, though.

I never thought I’d be friends with boys, but I like it. It feels different from being friends with girls—less pressure to act outgoing or girly. I hope we stay friends. I like them both a lot.

. . .

Then — 2000

“Hey, Harry,” Y/N called, running across the field toward the headmaster’s office where Harry stood, focused on his Nokia flip phone.

Harry glanced up, his expression softening when he saw her. He tucked the phone into his pocket and waved her over. Despite the end-of-day chaos, both were still dressed in their school uniforms. “Hey, baby.” He greeted her with a quick kiss, pulling her closer and wrapping an arm around her waist. He loved how perfectly she fit against him, as though they were made for each other.

“What’s going on? Aren’t we meeting Dylan to go to Ellis’ dorm?” Y/N asked, frowning slightly as she looked around for their other best friend.

Harry smirked, shaking his head. “We are, but Dylan got caught passing notes to Casey Becker in geometry. He’s stuck with thirty minutes in the headmaster’s office to make amends.”

Y/N chuckled, her laugh warm and familiar. “Again? He’s going to get himself expelled if he’s not careful.” She slid her hands under Harry’s blazer, warming them against his torso.

Harry brushed a strand of hair from her face, letting his thumb linger on her cheekbone. “How was your day?” he murmured, his lips brushing hers as he spoke.

“It was fine,” Y/N replied. “I scored three points in netball, and Tessa Riley gave me daggers in the changing room.” She giggled, leaning into him.

Harry smiled, pride gleaming in his eyes. “That’s m’girl.” He bent down and kissed her forehead gently.

“Oh, please, don’t make me sick,” a familiar voice drawled, breaking the moment.

“Hi, Dylan.” Y/N turned to see him strolling down the stone steps, his blazer slung over his shoulder and a cigarette dangling between his fingers. She leaned back against Harry, crossing her arms.

“Hello, my darling Y/N,” Dylan teased, his tone playful as he lit the cigarette with practiced ease.

“Seriously, Dylan?” Harry said, narrowing his eyes. “Do you really need another detention?”

“Don’t you smoke, Styles?” Dylan shot back, grinning. “Besides, Mary would love to see me again after our chat earlier. She’s got a soft spot for me.” He smirked, wiping his thumb across the corner of his mouth.

Y/N rolled her eyes, stepping away from Harry’s warmth. She was long used to Dylan’s antics—four and a half years of friendship had left little room for surprises.

The three of them had been inseparable since their first days at Southend Park Boarding School. Despite their differences in personality, they were like a family unit, supporting one another through the highs and lows of adolescence.

Dylan, the loudest of the trio, was notorious for his sharp wit and knack for trouble. Teachers despaired over his behavior, but students were drawn to his charm—especially the girls, who fell for his rebellious streak and the ever-present cigarette.

Harry, by contrast, was the golden boy: smart, polite, and beloved by staff. He balanced his role as student ambassador with captaining the football team, a position that made him one of the most popular boys in school. Dylan teasingly called him a “teacher’s pet,” but Harry wore the label without shame.

Y/N was the quietest of the three, rarely seeking the spotlight. She volunteered in the school library every Tuesday and spent her free time with her dorm mates. Still, Harry and Dylan were fiercely protective of her, and she often marveled at how lucky she was to have them.

The trio walked out of the school gates toward the housing blocks, their shadows stretching long in the late afternoon sun. Harry carried Y/N’s backpack on one shoulder, his free hand clasping hers. Dylan trailed behind, typing on his phone with an unlit cigarette between his teeth.

“Ellis doesn’t want you bringing anything to the party this time, Dylan,” Y/N warned, glancing over her shoulder. “You know what happened last time. If you pull that again, you’re getting kicked out of school.”

“My darling Y/N,” Dylan began with exaggerated sincerity, pausing for effect, “only for you.”

Y/N rolled her eyes but couldn’t suppress a smile.

When they reached her dorm, Y/N kissed Harry on the cheek and took her bag from his shoulder. “I’ll see you both later?” she asked, her eyes bright.

Dylan saluted her without looking up from his phone, while Harry smiled warmly. “I love you,” he said.

“I love you too, Harry,” she replied before disappearing inside.

Harry and Dylan walked in silence toward their dorm. The tension was palpable, Dylan unusually quiet as Harry’s mind churned with unspoken thoughts.

“We’re going to have to tell her at some point,” Dylan murmured, his voice low as the setting sun bathed the path in a golden glow.

Harry’s heart tightened. “No, we don’t.”

“Harry—”

“Shut up, Dylan. Nothing happened.” Harry’s voice was sharp, cutting Dylan off before he could continue.

They stopped, staring at each other, the air between them heavy. Harry’s frustration burned in his eyes, while Dylan’s sadness hung like a weight on his shoulders.

“I love her,” Harry finally said, his voice trembling. “I’ll never love anyone else as much as I love Y/N.”

Without another word, he turned and stormed into their dormitory, leaving Dylan alone on the pavement. Dylan exhaled shakily, the ache in his chest unbearable.

. . .

Then — 1998

Dear Diary,

It’s been a month since my fifteenth birthday, and Harry finally asked me out on a date. It feels like a dream, the kind where everything is so perfect you fear waking up to find it never happened.

To be honest, I think I’m already in love with him. He’s always been so kind to me, much more than Dylan. Harry carries my bag to class when I have netball, and sometimes, during English Literature, I catch him staring at me. There’s something about the way his gaze lingers that makes me feel seen.

In art class, he taught me how to use watercolors for the first time, his thumb brushing against mine as he guided me. Little moments like that remind me how much I care for him—so much that the thought of being without him feels unbearable. Is that dramatic? Probably. But I can’t help it if it’s true.

Even when I’m talking to Ellis during lunch or before bed, my mind wanders back to Harry—his smile, his eyes, the way he laughs at my jokes even when they aren’t funny, and how he hugs me differently from everyone else.

It feels strange to be fifteen and falling so deeply. What do I know about love at this age? How much further can I fall?

I think I’m going to love him forever. I hope he loves me forever too.

-

Dear Diary,

Harry kissed me today. My first kiss—with the boy I love most in the entire world.

I knew it was going to happen. We’d just finished dinner in the dining hall when he asked if I wanted to take a walk in the gardens. Dylan wanted to come along, but Harry shook his head, saying he wanted it to be just the two of us.

I felt a twinge of guilt when I looked back and saw Dylan standing there, his expression heavy as he watched us leave. He kept staring at Harry, even as we walked past the window overlooking the gardens.

Harry brought me to the tulips because he knows they’re my favorite. He said my braid looked pretty today, and that’s when I knew—I truly, completely loved him. It was the worst braid I’ve ever done, but he still thought it was beautiful.

We sat on a swinging bench, listening to birds returning to their nests. When he said my name, it sounded magical, like it had been made for his lips alone. I turned to look at him, and that’s when he leaned in and kissed me.

It felt like a scene from a movie.

No one ever tells you what it’s like to kiss someone for the first time. The way their breath mingles with yours, the world fading away as you close your eyes and step into a place so tender it consumes you. It makes you wonder if you’ve ever been truly loved before.

We only stopped because we heard a rustling in the bushes. We looked around but didn’t find anything, so Harry walked me back to my dorm. He kissed me again outside the door, and I floated through the rest of the night, humming to myself as I got ready for bed.

But when I think back to that moment, I could swear I saw a tuft of blond hair sticking out from behind a bush.

. . .

Now — 2000

Y/N sat cross-legged in front of the mirror on Ellis’ floor, carefully applying mascara as Fiona Apple played softly in the background. Ellis sat nearby, painting her nails a deep red.

“I’m just saying,” Ellis began, waving the brush for emphasis, “you and Harry have been dating for two years, and you haven’t done the deed yet?”

Y/N flushed at the mention of sex, shifting uncomfortably. She hated talking about it, even with Harry. Maybe it was because she didn’t know much about it or because she’d never had a safe space to ask questions, but every time the topic came up—whether in conversation or during truth or dare—she wanted to run for cover.

“We’re waiting for the right time,” Y/N said evenly, her voice robotic as she repeated the well-rehearsed answer.

“The right time?” Ellis scoffed. “I’ve never seen a couple more in love—it’s nauseating.”

Y/N hesitated, her mind drifting to moments when she’d wanted to take things further with Harry. But he always stopped before it went too far. Sometimes it made her feel like she wasn’t enough—pretty enough, desirable enough—but then he’d kiss her softly and remind her how beautiful she was, stroking her cheek as if she were the most precious thing in the world.

“I don’t know,” she admitted. “We’ve done... things, but not that.”

“Is Harry religious or something?” Ellis asked, narrowing her eyes.

“No, I don’t think so,” Y/N replied with a frown. “He’s never mentioned it.”

“Maybe he’s waiting until marriage,” Ellis mused.

The thought of marrying Harry made Y/N’s heart swell. She’d dreamed of it ever since their first kiss in the gardens—walking down the aisle in a white dress, Harry waiting for her at the end, tears in his eyes. Maybe they’d both cry.

“I don’t mind waiting,” Y/N said, her voice soft but certain. “I love him enough to wait as long as he needs me to.”

Ellis groaned, grabbing a bottle of vodka from her bedside table. “You can’t say stuff like that when I haven’t had a single drink.” She poured herself a shot and downed it in one go. “Okay, continue.”

Y/N laughed and turned back to her reflection, humming Queen’s Love of My Life as her thoughts drifted back to Harry.

. . .

Then — 1998

Dear Harry,

Today we went to the beach—the three of us. Me, you, and Y/N. I know in most situations it’s you, Y/N, then me, but in these letters, it will always be me and you.

We’d been planning this trip for weeks. It’s a three-hour drive to the coast from school, and Y/N had been complaining about the journey the entire time. I didn’t mind. Is it wrong of me to want to sit next to you on a bus full of people not one of them knowing who we are for three whole hours? Our knees touching for three whole hours? Sand on your feet and your hair salty from the sea, inhaling your scent and wanting your hand to touch my thigh for three whole hours?

When we got there, the morning was overcast, but by the time we hit the sand, the sun broke through the clouds. It was perfect. The light caught your skin, making it glisten, and your eyes shone with that impossible sea-glass green. I wanted to look into them forever, but you were too busy looking at Y/N.

I tried to catch your attention—touching your shoulder as I passed by, reaching for the beach bag at the same time as you, brushing my fingers against yours. But it didn’t matter. You only had eyes for her, and I only had eyes for you.

When you kissed her in the gardens, a part of me died. I had been pining for you for so long, silently hoping you’d see me, but it was always her. I felt stupid, running miles afterward, the wind howling in my ears: You fool, you idiot, how could he ever love you?

I didn’t want to feel this way, Harry. I tried to bury it, to pretend it wasn’t real, but when I met you, everything I’d hidden about myself unraveled.

The day wasn’t without its drama. Y/N, distracted, stepped into the road thinking the approaching van was the bus. You moved so fast, grabbing her and pulling her back before the van could hit her. I watched the terror flash across your face, the way you held her afterward as she cried. You kissed her forehead, comforted her, showed her the kind of love I’d only ever dreamed of.

And I hated her for it.

I feel terrible admitting this because I do love Y/N. I truly do. But most days, I hate her, and only because she has you.

When we finally got to the beach, the three of us ran toward the waves, shedding our clothes as we went, laughing like we were carefree children. For a moment, we were. We left our troubles behind in the sand.

You swung Y/N over your shoulder as you splashed into the water, and I couldn’t help but admire the way your muscles flexed. You were a work of art, Harry, something meant to be admired in a gallery. And I was nothing more than an observer, longing for what I could never have.

Later, Y/N went to get ice cream. Before she left, she asked for your order, and I already knew what you’d say—mint chocolate chip. The way she looked surprised made me feel smug for a second, but that quickly disappeared when she said it was her favorite too.

While she was gone, I felt a cramp in my shoulder. “Let me,” you murmured, and before I could answer, your fingertips ghosted over my shoulder, pressing into the tight muscle.

I couldn’t breathe, Harry. You were so close, your breath warm against my neck. For a split second, I thought if I just turned my head, I could kiss you.

I’ll never forget that moment for as long as I live. Even if you do.

. . .

Now — 2000

Dylan and Harry were in their dorm room, preparing for the party. Harry stood in front of the mirror, anxiously gelling his hair back.

“I think I’m going to do it,” Harry said suddenly, turning to face Dylan. “I’m going to go all the way with Y/N.”

Dylan froze, his heart sinking. He lit a cigarette, trying to appear nonchalant as he perched on the windowsill. “Really? Are you sure that’s a good idea?” His voice betrayed him, tinged with irritation and jealousy.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Harry’s eyes narrowed.

“I’m just saying, are you sure it’s the right time to sleep with her? After... what happened?”

Harry’s expression darkened. “Nothing happened. It was a mistake.”

“You keep saying that,” Dylan said, standing now, his voice rising. “Like you’re trying to gaslight me into thinking I imagined it. But I’ve imagined kissing you enough times to know what’s real and what’s not.”

Harry’s jaw tightened, his hands clenching. “I was drunk, and you took advantage of me.”

The words hit Dylan like a slap, but he forced himself to stay calm. “Don’t try that with me, Harry. It might work in your petty arguments with Y/N, but it won’t work on me. You’re the one twisting the truth to fit your narrative.”

“I don’t care what you think,” Harry snapped. “I only care about Y/N. And if you can’t handle that, maybe you need to step away—from both of us.”

“Step away?” Dylan said incredulously, his voice breaking. “You want me to walk away from the only two people who’ve ever cared about me? You want me to walk away from you?”

Harry hesitated, guilt flickering across his face. “You know how I feel about Y/N. I love her. I’m in love with her. Even if I felt something for you, it would never compare.”

“You’re lying,” Dylan whispered, his eyes glassy. “If you loved her so much, you wouldn’t have kissed me in the first place.”

“You don’t know anything!” Harry exploded, his voice shaking with fury. “Do you know what would happen if someone found out? What it would do to Y/N? To us? I felt nothing! It was a mistake!”

“Harry—”

“No,” Harry cut him off. “Whatever feelings you have, whatever intentions, you need to get over them.”

“That’s not as easy as you think—”

“You have to.” Harry’s voice was sharp, leaving no room for argument. Dylan stared at him, shattered, as Harry turned and stormed out.

He left Dylan standing there, broken, feeling like Harry had taken his very soul with him.

. . .

Then — 1999

Dear Harry,

We’ve been assigned as partners in media class, and now we have to make a music video. Naturally, you asked Y/N if she’d star in it. You told her she was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen and that she’d be perfect for it. She blushed, of course, and said yes. Then you kissed her—so long and so deeply that I had to look away.

I imagined myself in her place, wondering what it would be like to kiss you in public, to have the world see how much I adored you. If it were allowed, I don’t think I’d ever stop kissing you.

Today, we filmed the music video. You wanted it to feel like a coming-of-age story. I’d wanted something more abstract, but I agreed to your ideas, nodding eagerly at every suggestion, whether it was brilliant or terrible.

We filmed in the gardens—my least favorite place in the entire school. That’s where you kissed Y/N for the first time, and if I could erase that night from my memory, I would in a heartbeat.

The sun was shining as you whispered into Y/N’s ear while I set up the camera. I tried to block out the sound of your laughter, the sight of her hand on your shoulder.

“Are we ready?” I called, my voice louder than I intended. You straightened up immediately.

“Dylan, why don’t you be in the video with me?” Y/N smiled warmly. She had that rare ability to make everyone feel seen, like she was radiating sunshine. It was impossible not to smile back.

“My darling, you know I’m not nearly as perfect as you,” I teased, watching her blush.

I don’t even remember when I started calling her “my darling.” The first time, I remember catching the flash of jealousy in your eyes. I liked that. I liked seeing you react to me, even if it wasn’t in the way I wanted. You’re used to it now, but sometimes, when I say it, I still see a flicker of something in your gaze.

The music video took all day to shoot. Every time Y/N nailed a scene, you rewarded her with a kiss. I worked hard too, Harry. Shouldn’t I have been rewarded in some way?

When Y/N left for her library shift that evening, it was just the two of us. You wanted to capture the soft glow of the sunset, so we stayed behind to get more footage.

“My mother wants me to go into politics,” you said as we sat cross-legged on the grass, the camera between us. “But I’d love to do this—be a director. I’ve always wanted to be an artist of some kind. It’s a silly dream, but I think about it all the time.”

I could imagine it. You had a way of leading people, commanding attention without being arrogant. You cared so deeply—for the art, for the people—that it would probably destroy you someday.

“It’s not silly,” I said. “It’s never silly to dream. My God, Harry, we only live once. Might as well do everything we can to feel something in the little time we have.”

You looked at me then, really looked at me. For the first time, I thought you might be feeling a fraction of what I felt every day. “I’ve never told anyone that before. Not even Y/N knows.”

“It’ll be our secret,” I whispered. And for a moment, I could’ve sworn you glanced at my lips.

Then, just as quickly, you diverted the topic. Grabbing the camera, you aimed it at me lying in the grass. “Looks like Y/N’s not the only model anymore,” you teased.

I tried to act indifferent, but I would’ve stayed there all night if it meant seeing you laugh like that.

It makes me wonder, Harry—do you know how much power you have over your friends? Do you know that you have two people who worship the ground you walk on? How does it feel to be desired? How does it feel to have a choice in who you love?

. . .

Now — 2000

“You’re here!” Y/N beamed, running into Harry’s arms and wrapping her hands around his neck.

“Hey, baby,” he murmured, kissing her temple before setting her down.

The party was already in full swing. Students from across campus had crammed into Ellis’ dorm, the air thick with music, laughter, and the faint smell of alcohol.

“Hi, Dylan,” Y/N greeted, pulling him into a tight hug. “You’re dressed pretty smart. Planning on impressing anyone tonight?”

“Only you, darling,” Dylan replied, forcing a wink and a smirk despite the ache in his chest. Harry’s words from earlier still rang in his ears, but he pushed them aside.

Harry’s eyes darted to the cup in Y/N’s hand. “Have you been drinking?” he asked, his tone light but concerned.

“It’s water,” she whispered with a smile. Harry relaxed. She wasn’t much of a drinker, and he knew that.

“You look so pretty,” he said, marvelling at her dress. It was the one she wore for special occasions—one he had once told her was his favourite. A pang of guilt pricked at his heart as she looked back at him, her doe eyes filled with love.

“Come dance with me!” she said, pulling him toward the living room. “Both of you! My boys!”

Harry and Dylan followed her to the dance floor. The song Love My Way blared through the speakers, and Y/N moved between them, carefree and radiant.

At first, Harry danced with her, his focus entirely on Y/N. But then his gaze shifted to Dylan, who was swaying along with the music. Something unspoken passed between them, an invisible thread pulling them closer.

Harry laughed when Dylan moved towards him and for a moment they had forgotten everything around them. Dylan was just Dylan and Harry was just Harry, two boys who felt something they weren’t allowed to feel in the eyes of everyone else.

Harry was so close, their faces almost touching and for a moment Dylan thought they might kiss. But the blissful moment was broken as Harry stepped away, shaking his head, “N-No.” He whispered, “No, No, No.” He shook his head, his eyes frantic in search of Y/N.

“O-Oh, Harry,” Y/N yelped as he grabbed hold of her hand and lead her out of Ellis’ dorm and over to her own, three doors down from where the party was happening.

“What are you doing? Are you okay?” She cups his face in her hands and he exhales, trying to regain composure. This was the girl he loved, the only girl he could ever love and being in her hands felt like home. Didn’t it?

“Y-Y/N, I-I think I’m ready.” He presses his forehead against hers, kissing her bottom lip. “I’m ready.”

Her lips part in shock. She hadn’t been expecting this tonight and she wasn’t sure where Harry’s sudden desperation was coming from. He kissed down her neck as she tried to speak to him, “H-Harry, a-are you sure?” He nodded, his mouth leaving open mouthed kisses on her shoulder.

“I love you Y/N.” He looked into her eyes and she saw the sincerity behind them but also a hint of something else that she couldn’t quite place.

He started to peel her clothing off, his fingertips gently brushing against her soft skin. She tried to steady her breathing but her chest caved in and out as the oxygen in the room seemed to be escaping as he moved down her body. “Harry,” She whispered and he could hear the desperation in her voice. She reached for his hand and intertwined their fingers together.

Y/N was stripped down to her bra and underwear. This was the most skin she had revealed to anybody but she trusted Harry with everything in her, he was her best friend. He blew warm air over the thin material of her bra and her nipples hardened, an overwhelming sense of desire and lust flooding her insides. It was so new and overwhelming, her hands shaking as she ran her fingers through his hair and tugged on the roots.

“Baby,” He whispered, his hands cupping her thighs as he pressed kisses down her body.

“Harry, wait.” She murmured, his eyes looking up from where he was laying between her legs, “You’re still dressed.” She sat up and tugged on the hem of his sweater.

He laughed softly, as she struggled to pull the sweater over his head. She marvelled at the sound and kissed the tip of his nose. He pulled her onto his lap and she grinded her hips against his, “God look at you.” He whispered. “Don’t leave me Y/N. You can never leave me.”

“I’m never going to.” She said it like it was a promise.

His hands hooked the straps of her bra and he gently pulled them down, her breath hitching as the pad of his thumb brushed against the side of her breast. She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him in tightly, his face burying into the crook of her neck as he inhaled her.

This was going to be perfect, she thought, nothing could go wrong.

She grinded her hips against him again, a groan eliciting from his lip and a name escaping past the lips he had kissed her with so many times.

“Dylan.” Y/N froze. Her blood ran cold, and she pulled away as though Harry’s touch burned her.

“What did you say?” She pulled away, suddenly being naked in front of him didn’t feel right, being in a space alone with him didn’t feel right, everything she had ever felt for him before this moment didn’t feel right.

“Y/N,” He reached for her but she slipped away from him, slipped out of his touch, a touch she begged for just moments ago.

Harry’s heart no longer existed, wherever it was it had abandoned him and left him here in this terrible moment to fend for himself. He felt his eyes well up with tears as he watched Y/N try to pick up her discarded clothes. This wasn’t how it was meant to be, she was suppose to be picking up his clothes after a night making love to each other.

“Y-You said his name.” Y/N whimpered, she was panicking and Harry could do nothing but watch.

“Baby I-”

“NO.” She spat, “You don’t get to call me that. Not anymore.”

Harry watched as she turned around and clutched at her head, her knees buckling as she fell to the ground. She sobbed and sobbed, his hear wrenching at the sound of it. He had never heard a sound so painful in his life and he wanted to die in this very moment.

“No, No, No, No.” She sobbed, her shoulders shaking.

“Y/N please just let me explain.” Harry tried, crouching down in front of her and trying to place a hand on her now clothed shoulder.

“NO.” She pushed him away and leaped back, her back hitting the wall.

Harry was broken. He was truly broken. This was something well out of his reach in fixing and nothing he could do or say could make up for the fact that he had hurt the two people he loved and cherished the most in this world, in the span of one night.

“Get out of my room!” She began to scream, “Get out of here!”

A knock at the door shattered the silence.

“Hey, you guys in there?” Dylan’s voice called from the hallway.

Before Harry could respond, Y/N lunged for the door, anger blazing in her eyes.

“Get out of my room!” she screamed, her voice raw with betrayal.

Harry caught her before she reached Dylan, her fists pounding against his chest. “I’m broken,” she whimpered, her strength fading. “You broke me.”

And for the first time, Harry knew what it felt like to be utterly powerless.

. . .

Then — 2000

Dear Diary,

You know those secrets so big they feel like they could swallow you whole? The kind you promise never to tell a soul for as long as you live? At first, they consume you, taking over every thought and breath. But over time, they settle into the corners of your mind, a quiet part of you that only stirs when something triggers it.

Well, today I made one of those secrets.

It was a Tuesday, the day I volunteer in the library after school. There’s something peaceful about wandering the empty halls when no one else is around—a stark contrast to the chaos between periods. Mrs. Ableton asked me to deliver a stack of books to the English Literature cupboard. Our copies of The Catcher in the Rye were practically falling apart, so we’d ordered replacements.

As I walked through the hall, I caught movement out of the corner of my eye near the classroom where Harry and I have English together. Curious, I paused, almost dropping the books in my hands.

Harry was leaning against a desk, and Dylan stood in front of him. At first, I thought nothing of it and smiled, reaching for the door handle to make myself known. But then Dylan stepped closer, touched Harry’s hand, and kissed him.

I froze.

I couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe. The same lips that had kissed mine were now kissing the lips of my best friend.

I wanted to cry, but I was too shocked to do anything but stand there, watching. A part of me hoped I was trapped in a nightmare—that I’d wake up, call Harry, and laugh about how silly it all was. But when Dylan pulled back, Harry grabbed his arm and kissed him again.

That time, I couldn’t watch.

I backed away, the tears finally falling. My mind raced as I searched for somewhere—anywhere—I could cry louder, scream even, because this wasn’t something I could cry about quietly.

Harry was mine. But he was also Dylan’s.

By the time I went to bed, I’d convinced myself I would confront them. I’d tell them I saw what happened and ask if we could move on, pretend it never happened. But as the hours stretched on, I realized I didn’t want to speak about it. Talking about it would mean reliving it, over and over.

I didn’t want to remember.

I just wanted Harry.

So, this is a secret I’ll take to my grave. I’ll never tell a soul I watched Harry kiss Dylan in a way he never kissed me.

Even if it breaks me.

. . .

Now — 2000

“What happened?” Dylan asked. They were back in his dorm now, Harry pacing the room like a caged animal.

“She knows,” Harry muttered, his fingers pulling at his hair—a habit whenever he was upset. “She knows about us, what we did.”

Dylan collapsed onto the bed, his face pale. “How?”

Harry stopped and turned to him, shame written all over his face. “I said your name.”

Dylan’s shoulders sagged, and he buried his face in his hands. Images of Y/N, broken and sobbing on her bedroom floor, flashed through his mind. She had begged them to fix her, but they were the ones who broke her.

“It’s fine,” Harry rambled, his voice shaking. “I-I’ll give her some time, however long she needs. Then I’ll explain. I’ll explain it was a misunderstanding.”

“Harry,” Dylan said gently, standing to take Harry’s hands in his own. “I don’t think there’s enough time in the world for Y/N to get over this.”

Harry’s breath hitched, and a sob escaped him as he crumpled into Dylan’s arms. Dylan ran his fingers through Harry’s hair, resting his cheek against Harry’s head. “It’s okay, love,” he whispered. “Everything will be alright.”

“I hurt her so bad, Dylan,” Harry cried. “I love her, and I hurt her.”

“She was always going to find out,” Dylan said softly, the truth cutting deeper than any lie.

“It wasn’t supposed to happen like this,” Harry whispered.

Dylan sighed. “Why do you always talk about how things are meant to be? You act like your life was mapped out before you left the womb. Was it ‘meant to be’ that the three of us became inseparable? That you fell in love with both of us because you care so deeply? That I fell in love with you because you see art in everything? None of this was ‘meant to be,’ Harry. It just happened. And now we deal with it.”

Harry pulled back, tears streaking his face. “You still love me? Even after I pushed you away?”

Dylan smiled sadly, wiping a tear from Harry’s cheek. “I love you despite everything.”

Harry’s lips ghosted over Dylan’s, and for a moment, it felt like all their pain had been lifted. “Dylan,” Harry whispered, his voice trembling as he said the name again and again, like it was the only thing keeping him grounded.

“You can say my name as much as you want, love,” Dylan murmured. “I’ll always be here.”

. . .

Three weeks passed and the friends were no longer talking to each other, instead they acted as though they didn’t know each other as they passed each other in the hallway.

Harry had to try and not flinch when he saw Y/N scurry pass him, her eyes red and bloodshot as Ellis comforted her, glaring at Harry as they did. He wanted to speak to her but he was never given the chance to, rightly so considering what he had done to her.

Dylan and Harry, mostly Harry, thought it would best to keep their distance for a while. It killed them both to not be around each other but for the sake of their friendship with Y/N, they shared small moments of brief eye contact and touches throughout the day. Neither of them knew what was to come for the both of them but this limbo was enough for now.

Dylan ate lunch alone and as he did, he listened to the conversations of everyone around him. He wondered what it felt like for them to go about their day feeling like they belong in their own skin and not feel ashamed over who they love. He had never felt so alienated and so out of touch with himself.

He had been given an after school detention for an hour with Mr Henley after calling him sexist in front of the class. No one was around when he left the classroom until he saw a group of girls walking across the field.

At the end of the line was Y/N, wearing her netball uniform.

She must have caught sight of him because the next thing he knew, she was walking up to him. He had to check behind him to see he was seeing correctly.

“Hi Dylan,” She keeps her distance for reasons unknown to him but being around her again made him relax, he missed the friendship he shared right at the very beginning when they were thirteen and picking each other up from class to go to the sweet shop after school.

“Hey Y/N.” He offers her a smile.

“How are you doing?” He didn’t miss the way she gripped her bag like she was trying to stop herself from saying anything she really wanted to.

“I feel like I should be asking you that.” Y/N huffs, “I’ve had better days.” “Y/N-”

“Just tell me this,” She starts, “H-How long?”

Dylan decided he would be as honest and as straight to the point as he could be, it was what she deserved at least.

“Y/N the only thing we did was kiss one time. Harry stopped it because he’s in love with you.”

“And you’re in love with him.”

“Y-Yes.”

Y/N laughs incredulously, “We could never just be three best friends could we? It was always going to be complicated.”

“We could still be best friends Y/N.”

“But it’s not the same now is it?” She bit back and Dylan realised he needed to be careful with what he said. “Is he sad?”

“Terribly. Sometimes I hear him crying in his room at night.”

A silence fell between them which was strange. Y/N and Dylan has always had a brother-sister relationship, Dylan was always one to tease Y/N and make her laugh but right now it seemed all he was doing was making her upset.

“I’m moving schools.” Y/N confessed, “At the end of the term, I’m moving to Bridgewater. Mum’s moving in with her fiancee, and she wants me to be closer.”

“When were you going to tell us?” Dylan was shocked.

“I was given the choice. I could stay here or move to another school but if I stayed I’d have to stay at my dad’s during the holidays and I’m not in the mood to be lectured during my time away from school.”

Dylan didn’t know what to say, he couldn’t fathom the three of them not being together for such a long period of time. “I know what you’re thinking. I know I need to tell him but if we are going to have a shot at being friends again, I need to be away from you both.”

“Y/N,” Dylan shakes his head, “It doesn’t have to be like this,”

“You know I saw you when you kissed each other in the English Literature classroom?” She confessed, Dylan’s lips parting. “He kissed you in a way that he never kissed me. Everytime we kissed afterwards all I could think about was how different it was, how I desperately wanted him to kiss me the way I had seen him kiss you. I used to write in my diary about how I would die if I didn’t have him near me. I thought he would be the end of me but I didn’t realise you would be too.”

“I know he loves you Dylan and... I’m happy for you but I’m not selfless enough to stand beside you both and watch you fall in love when I so desperately love him too.”

“Y/N,” Dylan reaches out for her hand and takes it, “I’m sorry.” “I know Dylan, I know.”

. . .

Now — 2000

Harry’s leg wouldn’t stop jittering as he sat outside the school library on a Tuesday evening. He’d been waiting for this moment for weeks, replaying it over and over in his mind. He had spent countless hours rehearsing his apology to Y/N until it became a permanent loop in his thoughts.

When the library door swung open, he shot up immediately, brushing down his school trousers and running a hand through his hair. Y/N stepped out, holding a bouquet of flowers in one hand and her backpack slung over her shoulder.

She looked better than she had in weeks, and Harry’s heart ached at the sight of her. He would have carried her bag for her if they were still together.

Her expression changed when she saw him, her voice barely above a whisper. “H-Harry.”

“I came,” he said quickly, the words tumbling out. “I-I couldn’t believe it when I got your text. I’d have waited here for hours if you hadn’t shown up.”

Her face softened briefly, but she walked past him. “Follow me,” she said simply.

He trailed behind her as she led him to the gardens—the place where they’d shared their first kiss and filmed the music video for his and Dylan’s project. It was a space filled with memories of the three of them: Y/N doing homework, Dylan reading, and Harry strumming his guitar.

They sat down on the swinging bench, a familiar seat now heavy with unspoken tension. Harry noticed she kept her distance, and though every fiber of his being wanted to pull her close, he knew it wasn’t the right time.

“Who gave you those?” Harry finally asked, nodding at the flowers in her hand. A flicker of hope crossed his face.

“Debbie,” she said, referring to the school librarian. “It’s my last day working at the library.”

“You quit?” Harry frowned, his gaze flicking from the flowers to her face.

Y/N inhaled deeply before speaking. “I’m leaving, Harry.”

The wind seemed to leave him. “N-No,” he stammered, shaking his head. “You—you can’t. You can’t just leave. I won’t let you—”

“Harry,” she interrupted, reaching for his hand and holding it gently in her lap. “It’s what’s best.”

“How can you say that?” he asked, trying to pull his hand away, though her warmth made it impossible. “How can you say it’s what’s best? The three of us—we’re supposed to be together.”

“It’s a little too late for that, don’t you think?” Her eyes glistened with unshed tears as she looked at him. He looked thinner, more tired than she’d ever seen him, but she couldn’t help him—not anymore.

“Y/N, the thing with Dylan...” Harry began, his voice cracking. “I-I never meant for it to happen. We were just alone, I was stressed, and my emotions got the better of me. But I don’t feel the same way about him as I do about you.”

She shook her head softly. “Maybe that’s true, but not in the way you think. Dylan has always been there for you, Harry, in ways I never could. The way you look at him... it’s like he hung the stars in the sky just for you, like he tilted the sun so it would never blind you but still brighten your world.

“Maybe you do love me,” she continued, her voice trembling, “but love isn’t just about taking care of someone. It’s not carrying my backpack because it’s too heavy or doing my homework when I’m too tired after netball. Love is about being vulnerable. It’s about being taken care of, about laughing and crying and feeling like your heart is burning, and nothing can put it out.

“Now tell me, Harry. Did you ever feel that way with me? Were you ever vulnerable with me?”

Harry’s heart cracked. He opened his mouth to respond but couldn’t find the words.

“Please, Y/N,” he whimpered, his voice breaking. “I can’t be without you.”

“You have Dylan,” she said, trying to be the bigger person even though it shattered her inside. “It was never going to be me, Harry. Can you honestly look me in the eye and tell me you don’t have feelings for him?”

Harry looked down at the ground, his silence all the confirmation she needed.

Her heart broke all over again, but she forced herself to stay strong. “Why do you have to go?” he asked, tears streaming down his face.

“Because, Harry,” she said gently, “what good would it do for the three of us if I stayed? You need to find out who you are, and so do I. Before me, it was you and Dylan. Now, it will end that way - with you and Dylan.”

“And what about you?” he asked desperately. “What will you do? Where will you go?”

“I don’t know yet,” she admitted. “But I’m grateful for what I’ve had. You and Dylan will always be a part of me. I hope one day we’ll forget this pain, and everything will be okay again.”

She reached out, brushing his hair back the way she used to. “I love you, Harry. I love you so much, I feel like I could burst.”

“I love you too,” he murmured. For the first time, he meant it in a way that felt true—not as a lover, but as a best friend.

“Be brave,” she whispered, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “And tell him you love him.”

Harry nodded as the tears fell freely, clinging to her like a child who didn’t want to let go.

She was going to love him forever. She now knew he wouldn’t.

. . .

“She’s gone,” Dylan said softly from the doorway of Harry’s bedroom.

Harry sat at his desk, a pen still in his hand though it hovered, unmoving, above the page. “Was she alright?” he murmured.

“She was better than we probably thought,” Dylan admitted, realizing how much they’d underestimated Y/N’s strength. They’d always thought it was their job to protect her, but she’d always been stronger than the two of them combined.

“Right,” Harry muttered, his voice hollow.

Dylan moved to sit on the bed, the springs creaking under his weight. “I was thinking we could have the leftover soup for dinner instead of going to the dining hall.”

“I’m not hungry,” Harry replied—a rare admission from someone who was always hungry.

Dylan frowned. “How long are you going to wallow in this? Can’t you see we’re both trying to do the right thing for your benefit?”

Harry turned to him, anger flashing in his eyes. “And what exactly are you doing?”

“I’ve been keeping my distance,” Dylan snapped. “Acting like we’re strangers when we’re the complete opposite. Do you know how much it kills me to not be near you? To have to hide from myself?”

Harry stood abruptly. “And you think I’m not struggling? You think I haven’t been grappling with everything I feel?”

“Oh, don’t give me that bullshit!” Dylan shouted, standing to meet Harry’s gaze. “You had someone who loved you for two whole years. You have everything, Harry—loving parents, the best grades, popularity. And you act like it’s all been taken from you because I kissed you!”

“Y/N is gone because of us!” Harry yelled back.

“No,” Dylan said fiercely, his voice rising. “She’s gone because of you! Because you’re too afraid to be honest about who you are! Because you care too much about what everyone else thinks. That’s why she’s gone!”

Their faces were inches apart, their anger radiating in the small space between them.

“How dare you? Can’t you see this is difficult for me to accept?” Harry shouted, his voice trembling with anger and frustration.

“What is?” Dylan snapped back, stepping closer. “What is so difficult, Harry? What’s so hard that you have to sit in the dark and ignore the only two people who’ve ever truly cared about you? Huh? What is it? Tell me. TELL ME.”

“I am in love with you!” Harry yelled, the words ripping out of him like they had been clawing to escape for years. “I am a fool, and I am in love with you.”

Dylan froze, stunned. His breath caught in his throat as the weight of Harry’s confession settled over him. The words he had dreamed of hearing for years hung in the air between them, impossible to ignore.

“What?” Dylan managed, his voice barely a whisper.

“I have loved you since the moment I met you,” Harry said, his voice softer now but no less raw. “And it’s been killing me every day since. I think of you—daily, nightly, every moment in between—and it tears me apart. Kissing you was the bravest thing I’ve ever done, and denying it afterward made me a coward. But here I am now, standing in front of you, a man stupidly, hopelessly in love with his best friend.”

Harry’s eyes were red and glassy, the weight of years of unspoken emotion etched into his every feature.

Dylan stared at him, speechless. He had imagined this moment countless times, but now that it was real, the depth of Harry’s vulnerability left him breathless.

“Kiss me,” Dylan whispered, his voice breaking. “Kiss me.”

Harry didn’t hesitate. He stepped forward, cupping Dylan’s face in his hands as though it had been crafted to fit perfectly in his palms. Then he kissed him—fervent and unrestrained, pouring every ounce of his love and longing into that singular moment.

Dylan’s world ignited. A piece of him that had been dormant for years finally came alive. His heart and mind, long at odds, now burned in harmony as Harry’s lips moved against his. He felt consumed, but in the most beautiful way, as if he could lose himself in Harry forever and never once regret it.

“I love you too, Harry,” Dylan whispered when they finally parted, their foreheads resting together.

“I bloody well hope so,” Harry murmured, a small laugh escaping his lips as tears spilled down his cheeks.

. . .

Now

Dear Harry,

I’d like to tell you a story that will more than likely make you happy.

One day, I was sat in a café, only a twenty-minute walk away from Southend Park School, which is closed down now and turned into a factory to fix airplanes. I bought my usual order of a decaf cappuccino and a slice of toffee apple cake. On this particular day, they added more sugar to my cappuccino, so I knew it would be a good day.

Across from me, a woman sat, her dog lying down at her feet as she read The Catcher in the Rye whilst sipping on a fruit tea. I didn’t think much of it, but I found it interesting the way she would read something and then shakily jot something down in the little notebook on the table.

Anyway, I had originally come to the café so I could write about our trip to Brighton. You were still complaining about the sand in your clothes just last night despite the fact that Brighton has no sand.

“It’s alright, love,” I comforted you, helping you put your pyjamas on.

“It bothers me, Dylan.” You responded, coughing into your handkerchief.

We don’t leave our small bungalow very often because you don’t like to leave the dogs and I don’t like change, but this trip to Brighton was one we had been planning for a year or so, so we didn’t really have much choice in the matter.

We spent a lot of time sat on the beach in the evenings whilst we were there, a blanket wrapped around the both of us as we fed the seagulls. I remember you saying you liked the sound of the ocean because it made you feel like we were seventeen again, running into the ocean without a care in the world.

You then proceeded to mention how worried you are about our Y/N, “I hope she’s doing alright, our Y/N.” You said and then went back to talking about a programme you watched the night before.

You had always worried about Y/N in the years after she left, always asking where she was or what she was up to despite the fact we never got in contact with her again. I also wonder whether or not she is okay, and I knew that if I were to see her again, I would thank her for allowing us the space to fall in love.

It was awfully difficult those months after we kissed in your bedroom. We were constantly berated by people we had never spoken to before, and I knew it bothered you for a while, but we overcame it just like we did every other obstacle in our lives... together.

Anyway, as I continued to write about our trip, the door to the café opened again and three middle-aged people walked over to the elderly lady in the corner. “Come on Mum, we’ve got to say goodbye to Dad now,” the man spoke to her, and she swatted him away. Something about that small action gave me a strong sense of déjà vu.

“Give me a moment,” the woman responded, and the three children sat at the table in the chairs around her.

Eventually, they managed to get her standing up. One of them placed her coat around her shoulders, and another handed her her walking stick. When she turned to look at me, I saw a familiar set of eyes looking straight at me.

The three people aiding her walked to the door and held it open for her. As she was about to step out the door, her walking stick fell out of her shaky hands and right at my feet. I quickly picked it up and handed it to her, her face brightening at the sight of me.

“Thank you.” Her voice still sounded the same all that time ago.

“No... Thank you, my darling.”

[acanthasdreams]

an eligible bachelor - charlie dalton  ₊˚⊹♡

Uploading bc it’s the first thing I’ve written that I actually finished. Thank you to the people that replied to me on the Dying Poets Society community board as well ! Also I dunno what the fanon idea of charlie is just yet (im new), I’m just going based off vibes, aura, and other (few) fanfics I’ve read.  Warning: May have used “smirked” like 1000 times. Pls be nice 2 me. xo, acantha

🐇 . *. ⋆·˚ ༘ *༄

Charlie Dalton was laying on his bed, smoking a cigarette while his stuck up roommate Richard Cameron wasn’t there. Cameron would occasionally participate, but when he was knee deep into playing the tradition, honor, discipline, excellence student bullcrap, Charlie knew wouldn’t hear the end of it for smoking in their shared dorm. 

He had decided to skip the usual Friday evening study with the boys. 

He’d studied enough, he thought. Meeks had already helped him memorize all the necessary Latin phrases anyways. They now seemed to be constantly repeating a loop in his head

Amo, Amas, Amat…Agricola, Agricoli…

All Charlie wanted to say was blah, blah, blah.

So he took the rest of his day to rest, smoke a cig, read a dirty mag….something to chill him out. And of course, he was waiting for you. 

His childhood friend, you were the only person he could actually rely on outside of school. As children of two good business partners, you’d both found friendship amongst the fancy business dinners his parents and yours would host. It was safe to say you’d known each other long enough for him to call you up whenever he had the urge to, which was as often as he could.

You lived nearby and attended Henley Hall so of course he’d find any reason to bother you, asking you to sneak into his school, calling you up, or hanging out on weekends. Now three weeks into the new school semester, he needed to see you in person to have someone on the outside of Hell-ton to talk to. You were busier this year, and he hadn’t seen you much since the summer in which you’d spent the majority of your time together. He was getting withdrawals.

But of course, you almost always put up with his antics. His ways of finding rebellion in conformity was the small taste of rebellion you needed in your otherwise mundane life.

So here you were, skipping through the Welton corridors trying your best not to get caught by a Professor- or worse Mr. Nolan himself. Your casual clothing, that was definitely not up to the Welton dress code for males, was covered with Charlie’s Welton coat. It wasn’t cold enough yet to wear, but it’d have to do with helping you blend in when there were still boys roaming the school, settling in to start the weekend after a long week of rigorous classes.

Finally walking past the recognizable row of doors that made up the dormitories, you take a chance to more swiftly enter a familiar door. You let out a sigh of relief over making it safely, you lean back against it looking at the boy in question, who simply smirked up at you.

“Look what the cat dragged in” He greets, a cigarette hanging from his lips like an old pirate would with a pipe.

You blow a raspberry, taking off and tossing his coat at the end of his bed. All the walking mixed with the adrenaline of sneaking into his school made you warm.

“The cat being you, Charlie Dalton…Though I’d say you remind me more of a puppy dog.” You greet back, getting comfortable in the room you’d been in many times. Tapping his leg with your fingers, he moves his legs for you to sit before laying them casually over your lap.

“A puppy dog?? Ouch…you wound me, darling.” He says, pretending to be hurt as he holds his hand to his heart. But his lips were curled in amusement, inciting a small laugh from you. You pat his leg again, seeming to be quite settled in.

“Okay, okay…so what was the emergency you were calling me about, huh? Cameron irking you again or what?” 

“He usually is. Latin class is too. But,” He lets out a sigh as he puts out the cigarette on the metal headboard of his bed,“Can’t a guy just wanna see a pretty gal?” 

He leans over to ruffle your hair and you respond with a soft giggle, smoothing your hair back down.

“You see me far too often, Charlie…” You almost blush a little at him calling you a pretty gal, almost. “You know, my mother is actually starting to worry about your influence on me.”

It seemed you’d unintentionally spent the majority of the summer hanging out with Charlie, sometimes just a little bit past curfew. It was something your mother was not exactly keen about since it was often just you and him alone. Not proper for a young lady, she’d said.

Now it’s Charlie’s time to blow a raspberry, it seemed to be something he picked up from you and your reactions to him.

“I am a perfectly good influence on you, missy. Maybe your mother should worry about your influence on me.” He crosses his arms over his chest as he looks at you, a dramatically serious expression on his face. 

You both knew you had little influence on the free thinking, go-with-the-flow soul Charlie naturally was.

“Sure she should worry…who knows what I could put you on next. Today it’s cigarettes and pipes, tomorrow marijuana.” You act guilty, shaking your head slowly while holding back an amused smile.

“Do you actually know where to get marij-” 

“Charlie!” You playfully smack his arm and he laughs, raising his hands in defense. 

“Kidding, kidding…” Knowing him, you weren’t entirely sure how true that was.

“On a good note,” He starts, his cocky smirk coming back to his face. He seemed to even puff out his chest a little as he shares, “I know your father really likes me. He says nicer things to me than even my own father does to my face.”

I find yourself snickering as he seems to be extremely proud of his reputation with your dad. You had to admit, he was right. Much to your mother’s dismay, your father was constantly bringing him up at dinnertime, “how’s the Dalton boy”, “I heard this from his father”, “such a bright boy that Dalton”. You already heard from Charlie himself a lot, your years of friendship had him invading your life even when he wasn’t there. Your father loved him, and Charlie used it to the best of his advantage. It was really the only reason your father didn’t scold you for your summer shenanigans.

“I’ve heard, Charlie. Trust me” You chuckle to yourself just thinking about it, but you both knew exactly why. “I’m sure he thinks that the more he hypes you up to me, the more likely I’ll be to swoon for you.”  

Charlie lets out a chuckle with that, but anything relating to swooning had him back to his cocky act quite rapidly.

“Like I need him to hype me up, I know you swoon for me everyday darling. Who can resist all of this.” He puts his hands behind his head as he leans against his headboard, lifting a brow and smirking. 

The smirk was an ever present characteristic of him, since the moment he’d turned 15, he seemed to have mastered it. It amused you, probably his most charming characteristic.

“Oh, I’m swooning right now.” You roll your eyes before pretending to swoon, lifting a hand to fan yourself from his swoon-yness. That gets him laughing, the way you’d play along with him. He realized a long time ago that you didn’t realize how charming you were, but it was fine with him, only because that meant he got to appreciate how natural you were at it in secret. 

His laugh fades out, instead staring right at you. His smirk appears on his face yet again, an air smugness in it. 

“I guess your father’s plan worked after all then.”

The plan, both your father’s plans actually. They’d been scheming since they realized how close you’d gotten, which for fathers was actually not too long ago. Probably a year now.

“Ah, yes…turning you into an eligible bachelor in my eyes.” You snort amusedly, your eyes diverting from his own before the butterflies begin fluttering in your tummy.

It had become no secret to you and Charlie that your dad’s had been planning for a “union of families”, when you’d eavesdropped on them talking after a dinner party. They were good business partners, and longtime friends. With their children already being so akin to each other, it seemed the light bulb had gone on in their heads. 

But you knew Charlie. 

While he went along with what his father wanted, he only did it because he had to. Wellton, an ivy league future, business school. You knew that deep down, he wished to do something he wanted to do. Figure himself out, be a teen. Seize the day, as his new teacher had told him on the first day of his class. 

While you played around with the idea of being future Mrs. Dalton in your head, a thought formed from a crush that had been deeply stuffed away in your heart since you’d found out about your fathers plans. The inkling of anxiety over that plan told you that he secretly hated the idea of being pushed onto you. Maybe not because of yourself, but because it was yet another thing written into his future by his dad.

The last thing you wanted was to continue denying him a chance to write his future for himself, even if it meant pretending you weren’t on board with the expectation you’d both wed each other. Allowing it to continue being something you joked around about.

“Well, babe, I already am an eligible bachelor.” Giving his signature smirk, he puffs out his chest again and runs his hands through his hair dramatically, looking suave. 

This makes you laugh softly, but quickly your smile falters as you keep thinking about it. Charlie, being more perceptive than one would expect, notices this and nudges you softly on the shoulder.

“What? Am I that terrible of a possible husband?” He says jokingly, trying to keep up the playful atmosphere.

You chuckle lightly in response, trying not to ruin the mood. “No. You’re not…you’re a good friend, Charlie.” 

The atmosphere still seemed to change at your genuine compliment, Charlie’s own heart seemed to bloom, and he didn’t know what to do with that. He had never known what to do with it, pushing down his own feelings with the same idea that you didn’t want to be with him. 

Funny, since he was the one to flirt with you first, constantly trying to get your attention. He loved having your eyes on him, and only him.

He mustered a playfully toned comment.

“You make me blush.” He says, giving a much more authentic smile to you with a hand to his heart. Truly, it had skipped a beat. Knowing you saw him as a good friend was good, even if he wished it was more.

Silence seemed to fall between you, a comfortable one it seems as you lean your head back on the wall. Both of you seem to ponder it, the thing. But none of you knew what to say.

Finally, you’re the one that speaks up, “How would you feel if our dads plan worked?”

Another beat of silence.

“I know you don’t like doing what your father wants you to do, what he plans for you.”

Your eyes dart Charlie’s face, searching for an answer. He was looking at you pretty intensely, seeming to ponder the idea more deeply.

This is the first time you’ve seen Charlie seem so serious, and he was with reason. He knew what you meant to say, and it’s something he had thought about since the summer you two had shared ended.

Would he mind if you had fallen for each other, outside of your fathers pressure? 

Charlie grabbed the pack of cigarettes laying beside him and opened it, and placed one in his mouth. Though he didn’t light it up, it was more of a comfort thing. He was never one to be so serious, and this was both your feelings you were talking about. The last thing he wanted to do was say the wrong thing. 

And honestly, he adored you. More than he could ever say. Why else would he want your presence so constantly?

He hummed for a moment before speaking.

“I don’t like doing what my dad wants…” He admitted, his voice seeming quieter than usual as he takes the unlit cigarette out of his mouth. “But honestly…this is the first time I feel like I wouldn’t mind. Honestly, it’d be more of a personal decision”

His smirk returns, this was his way of seizing the day. He didn’t want to waste time going around the topic any longer when he knew deep down that you were the only girl he’d ever thought about, as flirty as he was generally. His gaze returned to you, And he was happy he did, because his answer had made your cheeks turn pink. You seemed almost flabbergasted by his answer. 

He’d willingly be with you.

“You wouldn’t mind?” You seem almost confused, but he seemed all too casual about it now that he’d seen how adorable you looked at his honest answer. 

He was choosing honesty today.

“I wouldn’t…I’m eligible, your father likes me, you’re a pretty girl.” He lists off, seeming sure of himself. He adjusts himself, removing his legs from your lap to scooch closer to you. His hand reaches up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and your heart seems to flutter out of your chest. His heart did as well, but he was much too suave to let it show. 

“Seems like a winning hand to me.” 

It seemed…like his actions left you speechless. You were able to speak eventually, cracking a small smile.

“Seems like the winning hand was our father’s, in the end.” You say in a jokingly sardonic way, chuckling softly. 

“And the losing hand of your mothers.” He snorts right back. “Point is, I win in some way or another.”

He couldn’t help himself, he really couldn’t when it seemed like the perfect moment. 

Damn it Charlie, just do it, he thought before leaning in to steal a soft kiss from you. He’d always wondered if the gloss you wore was flavored. It smelled of cherries, and as he learned- it tasted like it, too.  The kiss was surprisingly tender, his hand still on your cheek. You eventually collect yourself enough to kiss back, your heart soaring. It was too early for a full blown make-out session though, so you both pulled away after a few moments. 

Dalton felt way too smug with himself about it, very proud of his ability to be assertive for once, after almost two years of crushing on you. You, on the other hand, could only give him a shy smile and looked away.

“I did not know this was how this evening would go…” You admit meekly, unable to meet his eyes after the kiss you shared. 

“That we’d seal the deal of you becoming Mrs. Dalton? Honestly, me neither, but…” He shrugged, his hand going to your chin to force you to look at him, “Carpe diem.” 

He leaned in again, but this time almost full blown tackled you into yet another kiss. Albeit, it was much more passionate than the first time. You couldn’t help but get lost in it, wrapping your arms over his shoulders, letting his hands into your hair to hold you in place. 

You’d have to find a way to thank Mr. Keating for this moment of carpe diem sometime, but you didn’t have a chance to process the pondering on that at the moment.

It was the most magnificent moment.

“Dalton- everyone is asking why you- oh!”

Pulling away with eyes wide and cheeks red, you look to the doorway to see someone who was equally as red-faced as his hair.

“Damn it, Cameron!” Charlie tossed his pillow at him, standing up to push his back out of the door, “We’re having a moment in here, please!”

He closes the door behind him, looking back at you, you were still in complete shock over being caught. 

“I think that’s my queue to head home, Charlie.” You say sheepishly, chuckling in embarrassment as you get up and begin putting his coat back on. The sun could be seen as it was beginning to set outside the small dorm window anyways. 

Charlie’s little heart almost stopped beating, he wished to spend more time with you after this new development of your relationship. And his want was a lot, with how clingy he already was. But you were right, Cameron had ruined the mood enough. He mentally cursed Cameron even more.

“Fine.” He let out an exasperated sigh, but then quickly put on a satisfied smirk on his face, grabbing you by your sides, “But we’ll finish this another time, future wife.” 

That made you laugh, leaning up to give him a kiss on the cheek. You’d done it once or twice before, and after the kisses of today, they still felt extra special. 

“I’ll see you later, Charlie.” Putting the hood of the coat on, you slipped out of his room ready to sneak your way back out of Wellton...the things you did for this boy. 

Charlie was sure you’d taken his heart with you… and for once, he was happy his dad had already pre-approved of you as part of his future. He’ll take business school if it means he’ll get to take care of you comfortably.

🐇 . *. ⋆·˚ ༘ *༄ 

“I went in- and they were all over eachother- and…!”

Charlie Dalton was determined to strangle his roommate as he walked into the dormitory lounge. 

“Cameron.” He said through grit teeth as he walked up to the group. Apparently, Cameron was already spilling about what he’d seen in their dorm to the rest of their friends. Way to keep his business private.

Everyone was already teasing him about it, making smoochy noises, and holding him back from an expulsion waiting to happen. 

“Oh shut up Knox, like you don’t want to make-out with that Chris girl.” The boys all laughed at this, Knox seemed to shut up real quick though (it was true).

“So, what did happen with her Charlie?” Asked Neil, who patted him on the shoulder in a proud manner. He of all people had seen the development of this crush over the years.

“Heh…” Charlie couldn’t help the smugness to come back, the feeling of her lips still lingered on his and it made him feel like a real man.

“What can I say boys…I siezed the day.”

The boys gave him sounds of cheer and pats on the back, impressed by him taking Mr. Keating’s message so deeply into his heart. 

“Are we still studying trig-?”

“-You don’t get it, do you Cameron?” Charlie rolled his eyes.

“...What?”

[seokgyuu]

part of the @svthub 70's collab

Lee Seokmin is a very successful and admired Detective in the NYPD. Up until now he has had no trouble catching the bad guys. But when an especially horrific serial killer starts roaming the streets of New York City and he faces perplexity for the first time in his career - his superiors send a unit from the FBI trained to profile Serial Killers, which contains none other than you - Seokmin’s High School Sweetheart.

Pairing: Detective!Seokmin x FBI Agent!Reader

Genre: Criminal Minds/Detective AU, exes to enemies to lovers, Serial Killer AU, angst, Smut (MDNI!)

Warnings: Serial Killer theme, description of violence, description of dead bodies, cult themes, mentions of suicide, mentions of blood, mentions of abuse, mentions of suicide, character death (none of the main characters); smut warnings: fingering, penetrative sex, dirty talk, usage of the word “baby”, begging, reader has female anatomy, unprotected sex, creampie

Wordcount: 15.8k

a/n: I finally made it!! after months and months of writer's block I finally finished this fic, and I am actually really happy with it. Please mind the warnings, as this goes into darker themes. I also want to note, that I am no expert in terms of criminal language especially during the 70s in the us. So, if you spot anything that isn't all that accurate, i apologize! I also want to thank @multi-kpop-fanfics, @bitchlessdino & @strawberryya for reading through this and telling me i, in fact, do not suck at writing lmao. ily guys!!

taglist: @the-boy-meets-evil, @wooahaeproductions, @wongyuseokie

Lee Seokmin was a proud man. Proud of his grades in school and university. Proud of the man his parents had shaped him into. Proud of all the cases he had solved as a detective. With pride comes vulnerability, though. Especially in cases like these when he doesn’t have the right to be proud of himself. When he feels lost and helpless and his superiors look at him as if he had never solved a single case in his career. 

He knows. He knows he isn’t giving them or the people of New York City anything to go by. All he can do is say he needs more time. Time that no one has. 

“More people will die, Lee.” 

Seokmin hates Jeffrey Stolper. Hates him like fire burns. There is nothing he can do about it. Balling his fist under the table, Seokmin slowly raises his head. There is a certain emotion in Stolper’s eyes, an emotion Seokmin was happy to say he hadn’t seen many times before. His older colleague was gloating. While they were working together, their boss put Seokmin in charge because of the very obvious numbers differentiating them. Seokmin solved cases. Stolper left them cold. Seokmin couldn’t count the amount of times he had helped Jeffrey from drowning in his own misery, and this was the thanks he got. The older man was gloating because, for the first time in practically ever, Seokmin was lost. 

“Thanks, Stolper, couldn’t figure that one out myself,” he mumbled, letting his free hand roam over his sweaty face. Scoffing, the older male with the slowly graying hair leans back in his chair.

“Not the hot shot everyone says you are, aren’t you?”

“Shut the fuck up, this is not the time.” Seokmin’s voice is quiet but sharp, and Jeffrey laughs, his chest heaving as he seems to be vibrating with the horrendous sound of his arrogant laugh. It takes everything inside Seokmin not to get up from his chair and punch the hell out of the man. 

“Lee, Stolper.”

Both of them get up when their superior walks in, a big man with a receding hairline, a stubble on his strong face, and an old suit on his large frame. Frederic Bream isn’t much of an empath, but he does a good job. 

“Captain.” Seokmin and Stolper speak at the same time, watching as the captain nods and then waves his hand, telling them to sit back down. Once all of them are seated, he clears his throat.

“I know you hate to admit it, Lee, but we have no leads on this. No leads and a new victim.”

Seokmin’s heart falls down to his feet. Fuck. Another dead girl? Who will it be this time? He feels sweat starting to form at the top of his head. 

“Another one?” Stolper is serious and reaches for the case file Bream put on the table. Seokmin feels as if someone had dumped him in ice water, unable to move, shivering. He hates the fact that Bream is right - there are no leads. So far they haven’t gathered anything from what this monster does except that he always does it the same way. 

“Lauren White, 23. Student at Columbia,” Stolper reads, his face in a grimace, “she was found near Times Square, too. Fuck, Lee, I told you to put more patrols out!”

“Don’t be ridiculous. Even if we put every man we have on the streets, this city is huge, Stolper. He could just start moving them somewhere else.”

Stolper doesn’t respond. Instead, he shoves the file over to Seokmin, who takes it with his jaw tensed.

“This is different from before, boys,” Bream clears his throat, “this is a high-profile murder. She is the daughter of the district judge.”

Seokmin looks up from the file. 

“Why is this different from the other four victims? Because she has an important dad, suddenly the tables turn?” 

Bream sighs, pulling a hand over his red face. 

“It’s not fair, I know that, Lee. But this changes everything. The judge is furious. Was a real fucking asshole about it too, even for someone who just lost his daughter. He wants the slasher to be caught yesterday.”

“Oh, and we don’t? Captain, please, this is bullshit!” Seokmin scoffs, throwing the file back on the table and glaring at his superior, who looks straight back at him.

“I know. We all know Seokmin. It’s a bad situation. But, some might say, it did bring something good.”

“And what’s that?” Stolper speaks up, crossing his arms. Bream clicks his tongue.

“We got sent help. From the FBI.”

Silence is what follows. Seokmin feels the ice inside his veins melt and instead get replaced by fire. He knows Stolper feels the same. Everyone here feels the same. The fucking feds.

“They can’t take this from us. We’ve been on this for months,” Seokmin hisses, and Bream nods again, licking his dry lips.

“They won’t take it from us, Lee. They are only here to help. In fact, they aren’t… our usual feds.”

“What does that mean?” Seokmin raises his brows, leaning forward, hands on top of the table.

“They are a completely new department. Focused on the behavior of criminals, analyzing them, trying to figure out what is wrong with them.”

“They are killing people. That’s what's wrong with them!” Stolper shouts, and Bream holds up his hand. 

“I understand that you’re upset. God knows I am, too. But there is nothing I can do. Go talk to them. They just arrived.”

The ice is back, and this time it hits Seokmin right in the face. They are here already? Waiting for them? Embarrassment flows through his veins, mixed with an emotion he has never felt before regarding his job: failure. His legs are shaking as he gets up, but he tries to play it off, his body tensing when Bream leads them to the door and opens it. 

The hallway to the main hall suddenly feels longer than it is. The walls are closing in on Seokmin, the gray concrete threatening to suffocate him as he walks over the horrendous blue tiles he never understood were placed in the first place. Nothing really seems to be matching in this precinct. Most especially Seokmin and the federal agents waiting for them downstairs. He doesn’t know how his legs lead him to the glass front that shows the inside of the busy station downstairs. Everything is the same gray color. Everything is the same horrible blue. The only difference is the people standing in the right corner of the room all gathered around the whiteboard Seokmin has so carefully put together these past few months. 

His hands are sweating. This isn’t fair. This is his case. They aren’t supposed to be here and take credit for what he has done so far. What exactly have you done, Lee Seokmin? The voice in his head reminds him, and he balls his hands into fists as Bream opens the door leading to the stairs that will finally bring him to the federal agents he knows he’ll hate already. 

The atmosphere in the room is tense. More tense than usual because everyone in it is unhappy with the current situation. As if it isn't hard enough that there is a killer on the loose, now there are FBI agents trying to take this away from the NYPD? This is his town, Seokmin’s town! No one knows it as well as him. He knows every corner, every store. Every good place to eat, every bar to avoid. The people know him; they trust him with this, and now he is just supposed to accept that he can’t continue what he started?

He doesn’t know how, but somehow, he does end up right behind all the agents and one of the other detectives, Jeanne, and doesn’t even try to hide the fact that he is bitter. His arms are crossed as he listens to Jeanne explaining what is on the board. She had been a part of this - just like all the other detectives had been whenever they could. It’s not like crime suddenly stopped in New York City just because a serial killer was roaming around. If anything, it just got worse. 

“That’s about all we’ve gathered. I know it’s not much, but it’s all we got.” Jeanne closes her explanation, and Seokmin watches the backs of the agent's head nodding. Bream then clears his throat, making the others aware that they have joined and once the team of strangers turns around, Seokmin thinks someone has yet again taken a bucket of ice and dumped it all over his head. Because why on earth are you here? 

You see him the second he sees you. It’s almost funny how your professionalism slowly slips out of your control, how seeing him makes memories flood your brain and almost drowns you. Why is he here? He, who had left you with a sour taste seven years prior to this moment? Why is he standing there in a well-fitted suit, looking the best he ever had in a precinct that shouldn’t have anything pretty inside it? 

“Detectives, may I introduce you to agents Son, Song, Kim, Seok and Y/L/N. They were sent here by the FBI to help us with the investigations.” Jeanne smiles, but Seokmin knows it’s not an honest smile. You see it, too. When you had gotten the memo to go to New York City and help with the slasher murders, you had already known the detectives wouldn’t be too happy to see you and your team. 

“It’s nice to meet you. I’m the team leader, Hyunwoo Son.” You hear your boss speak, and you want to look at him, but your eyes are back to being glued to Seokmin. Lee Seokmin. The one who had taken everything from you when you were nineteen. 

“You too. I’m Detective Stolper. This is Detective Lee.” Bream doesn’t sound sincere. For once, Seokmin is relieved his older colleague likes to speak over him. He doesn’t know if he would have been able to say a word. 

Catching a serial killer is one thing. Catching him with someone you share an uncomfortable history with, another. You are sitting as far from Seokmin as you possibly can. With as many people between you as there are. 

Hyunwoo is standing at the front with Matthew, explaining what your team has gathered as of now. The rest of the precinct is listening to the presentation, and you just know they are all biting their tongues. No one wants you here. All of them think you’re a fraud. While you understand where they are coming from, you also think it’s time for them to accept the newly found ways to analyze the behavior of killers like the case at hand: the Manhattan Slasher. The air is thick with sweat, and you are sure 70% of it is yours. 

“We want to make clear that the work your precinct and especially you, Detective Lee, have done so far is incredibly helpful. We don’t want to discredit what you’ve done and we also don’t want to make you feel as if you’re getting kicked off the case. We aren’t your usual federal agents, Detectives, we are here to be of support to you. You still go outside and look at the crime scenes. You still get to do your work. We are here to assist, to see things we have been trained to see, things you cannot see, not for lack of smarts but lack of training.”

You had always admired Hyunwoo. How he spoke so clearly and calmly, how he never failed to make a person feel seen. You can feel the atmosphere shift. Some of the police officers visibly relaxing in their seats. You still don’t dare to look at Seokmin.

“Now, to what we have gathered. Dr. Matthew Seok will lead you through it.”

Seokmin wonders how old Matthew Seok is. He can’t be any older than 23. How on earth is he already a part of one of the newest FBI departments? And gets to be in charge of the presentation? And how does he already have a god damn PhD?

“Hi everyone, I’m Dr. Matthew Seok. With the help of the information you’ve gathered, we were able to come up with a profile for our unsub.”

Seokmin feels a scoff in his throat but manages to hold it back. A profile? What is he talking about?

“We are positive the unsub is a white man in his early to late 30s. He most probably grew up with an abusive mother, which explains why he only picks women as his victims. He doesn’t care about their race or social standing, which tells us he doesn’t hate one specific type of woman, but all of them. The age range of his victims is from early to mid twenties, meaning his mother had him young and gave him up around that time.”

You should be used to it by now. The reaction from the precincts. But it bothers you just as much as it usually does. The way they look at each other, the way they are already fed up with you being here. Your eyes wander over to the rest of your team, who you know are just as fed up as you, but they are better at hiding their emotions. Yuqi just stands there with her gum in her mouth, her arms crossed, and hoping she’ll get to go on the field soon. While she is an excellent profiler, she did train to become a field agent. It was pure coincidence that Hyunwoo had overheard her talking about this one case even Matthew had been struggling with. Jungwoo is the quietest one of your team, especially in situations like this. He just stands there, hands folded in front of his frame, eyeing the situation calmly. The team leader himself stands next to Matt still, his arms crossed as well and his gaze wandering over the crowd of people. A traitorous part of you envies him for being able to look at Seokmin without any repercussions. 

“How the fuck do you know that?” A voice now erupts from the sea of people. You turn around to see the man who had walked in with Seokmin. Stolper, you think his name was. A frown appears on your face.

“It’s not our job to explain profiling to you,” you say coldly and the older man’s eyes find you - just like Seokmin’s do. You decide to ignore them and turn back to face Matthew.

“Uhm. Yes, well, we do ask you to look into certain… well, behaviors. People like our unsub aren’t exactly the most masculine. He is probably very thin and might even have a disability - perhaps a prosthetic leg or something that makes him feel inferior. Look into churches, veteran centers, see if you find anyone that could match the profile and-,”

“You mean to tell me that the killer could be a vet?” Bream now interrupts, his eyebrows raised. Seokmin presses his lips together. If his colleagues hadn’t been wary of your bunch before, they sure as hell are now. War Heroes? Their precious American patriots that fought for their country and won a war? How could you even dare to speak ill of them? 

“No. He most probably didn’t serve. He tells people he did and that that’s the reason he has said disability,” Matthew continues calmly and you smile slightly. It was a reach, your reach, but so far all your reaches had been a shot to the bullseye. 

Then there was a sudden thud somewhere behind you, followed by hurried footsteps and news none of you could pretend didn’t make you sick to your stomachs.

This feels wrong. It’s broad daylight, there are people everywhere. You stand next to Matthew, your hands buried in your pockets, and listen to the statement of the girl that had called the police. 

“She was just next to me and then.. and then suddenly she wasn’t. I- I was confused and looked around and then I saw this- this man and how he dragged her by the arm into his car. No one did anything, no one- no one helped her and I- I didn’t-,” her voice breaks off and another set of tears well up in her eyes. Seokmin nods understandingly.

“Miss, you have nothing to blame yourself for. It is a busy street and you and your friend were not glued by the hip, alright? We will do our best to find her and you shouldn’t worry about what you could have done differently. You called us right away and that's the best thing you could’ve done.”

Tears are rolling down her face, sobs are erupting from her tiny body, and you wonder if Seokmin would ask her out if it wasn’t for the circumstances. The second the thought hits your brain, you freeze. What the hell? Why on earth would your mind go there? In a situation like this? You shake your head to yourself and look around - the police have put tape around the area where Kelly has gotten abducted. Her friend, Jean is being questioned, along with the few other people who claim to have seen something. But other than the witnesses, there isn’t much to go on about. The car he had dragged Kelly into had been an old one and Jean couldn’t exactly tell what kind. She also hadn’t been able to make out the license plate. So, all in all, it was all more or less useless information. 

“Detective Lee, I will need you to go to the morgue with Dr. Seok and Y/N,” Hyunwoo is suddenly there, right next to Seokmin and you hear his voice and feel your stomach tighten. The professionalism has to stay in its place, you know that. There is no room for you to fall back into old patterns; that one silly thought you had earlier was enough. You can’t let it get any further. 

But the tension is there and it's suffocating. You’re in the backseat of Seokmin’s car and Matthew is talking the man’s ear off with information you have heard millions of times before. Thankfully your friend and colleague doesn’t feel what you feel, what Seokmin feels, and for a short second you ask yourself how he even became the youngest member of your team - only for you to remember you have never met a mind as brilliant as his, with the exception of human interaction. He isn’t too good at those. 

The morgue is just like any other you’ve been in. This one still feels different, though. Probably because of the young girls you know shouldn’t be dead laying on top of the examination tables with nothing but a thin blanket over their pale, lifeless bodies. You should be used to this by now, you think. But you doubt you ever will be. 

Matthew is standing next to one of the women, the fourth victim, Fernanda Franco, with this look on his face you’ve seen many times before. You’re standing opposite him, your arms crossed and your eyes shifting over the body, wondering how much pain these women had been in.

“He did a thorough job with the cut,” the coroner says now; he is standing on the side of the room, holding a file, “my guess is he is good with a knife, maybe working with animals.”

“Right,” Matthew mumbles, a frown on his face as he leans forward, eyeing the victim from top to bottom. It’s somewhat fascinating how good he is at spotting things others haven’t seen before. Perhaps it had made you jealous a while back, but fortunately, that is over. Instead of being jealous, you appreciate his work and his abilities. 

Seokmin, meanwhile, is also looking through files. Mostly from the crime scenes. How the women looked before the coroner took care of them. The fact that they are all still here, and not yet down under, no funeral held at this point, makes his stomach turn. He knows it’s wrong. But as long as they haven’t found the killer, as long as there might be more evidence on the bodies… Seokmin suppresses a sigh. He wants to give the families the chance to find closure so badly. If only by giving them the opportunity to put their daughters, sisters, grandchildren to rest. 

The pictures are still hard to look at. The blood everywhere. The stained clothes. The signs of clear torture. Nothing sexual, at least. But then again, perhaps the killer doesn’t need to sexually assault them to feel arousal. That’s what Matthew said earlier. Seokmin closes the file and pulls a hand through his hair, his hat safely stored on one of the cabinets. 

“Dr. Richmond,” Matthew’s voice makes Seokmin look over to where you are standing. 

“Dr. Seok?” Richmond walks over to Matthew who is standing bent over the body, his hand holding… the victim’s ear. Immediately, you and Seokmin step closer, both of your eyes glued to the women’s earlobe. Something inside your stomach turns, goosebumps suddenly all over your skin and you feel your breath getting stuck in your throat.

“Why wasn’t this in the files?” Matthew now continues to ask, his eyes not leaving what he found. Dr. Richmond feels his face go pale and sweat starts to form on the palms of his hands. Blood is rushing through his ears and there is nothing he can say, nothing he can try to come up with because the bitter truth is-

“He didn’t know it was there,” Seokmin finishes the thought and Richmond swallows hard, hands wiping away at his lab coat. The detective is right. 

“Do all of them have this?” You ask now, finally able to move away from Fernanda and move over to Jennifer Cartwright, who looks way too peaceful for what had happened to her. But then, you are happy she does. A part of you hopes she is feeling peace wherever she may be. When you reach for her earlobe, you already know it will be there. You take a deep breath. 

“I’m- I don’t understand. I never… nothing like this ever happened, I-,” Richmond’s voice echoes through the room, but none of you pay him mind. The small crosses, carved into the soft tissue of the women’s earlobes, take all of your attention. 

There were only a handful of people in the meeting room. Your team and Seokmin and his superior officer. It bothered you, kind of. More people had to know. 

“These crosses, they have been used before,” Matthew is pacing through the room and Hyunwoo is right there at the front of it, his arms crossed and his thumbnail between his teeth. He is thinking, listening.

“This was in the late fifties, early sixties. A cult, they all followed this one man, Jonathan Brixley. He claimed to have somewhat superpowers, and while most didn’t actually believe him, he was such a good preacher, they followed him anyways. They weren’t known for being violent up until they seemed to vanish. Many thought they might have done a suicide pact, but no bodies were ever found. But what we do know is that whenever one of their own died, they would carve a little cross into their earlobe. Almost unnoticeable. Almost like a birthmark - it’s not even that surprising Dr. Richmond didn’t catch on.”

“He didn’t catch on that all of the girls have the same strange birthmark?” Seokmin frowns. You roll your eyes.

“We are all aware that this isn’t the ideal situation, Detective, but perhaps being bitter about it doesn’t make it better.”

It’s the first time you and Seokmin have directly talked. Or more like, the first time you had openly acknowledged each other's presence.

“With all due respect, Agent, I don’t care. I want to be bitter, I am allowed to be bitter. If we had known this weeks ago, we might have cracked the case by now!”

“I highly doubt that, Detective. With all due respect,” Matthew chimes in and the (unpleasant) moment between Seokmin and you is over. 

“And why is that?” Seokmin’s superior officer asks. 

“Well, as I said, the cult vanished. Finding out where the last remaining members are is almost an impossible task. If there even are any - I doubt they’d wanna be found. For all we know, they could be hiding in plain sight and we wouldn’t know.”

The atmosphere gets even more uneasy. If that’s even possible at this point. Seokmin scoffs and looks away, his hands in fists. You should know how to de-escalate but your head comes up empty. It’s almost as if there is an invisible barrier that forbids you from actually trying to be reasonable with Seokmin. 

Just when Hyunwoo seems like he wants to say something, the door opens. One of the police officers, a woman with red hair you don’t know the name of, comes in.

“We have a situation,” she says and her eyes are full of something even you, a profiler, isn’t so sure what the meaning of is. It looks like fear, confusion, but also something like hope. Immediately, everyone gets up and follows her outside, where you spot the board with all the pictures of the victims on it… and a red thread connecting one of them to a new face.

“That’s the girl I talked to earlier.” Seokmin breathes and he looks over at Ruth, who nods. 

“Yes, Detective. Jean told us that she knows one of the girls - Rebecca Twain. They used to go to the same church, same goes for her friend, Kelly, that she called in as abducted.”

Your eyes widen at that and you look over at Matt, who has his hand over his mouth, his face in a frown. A church. That fits the idea of the cult. All of you who were in the room earlier know that. This is good, this is an actual clue, one that might even lead to something after all! 

“What church?” Bream now asks the police officer named Ruth. 

“She wasn’t too sure. Said they haven’t been there in ages. She knew Rebecca when they were children and Kelly came to join them a few years later. But they haven’t gone to the church in at least 12 years. She said she would call us with more information, but so far she hasn’t.”

It doesn’t take a genius to understand why she hasn’t called the station yet. You sink down, leaning against one of the desks now, a hand rubbing over your face. This was bad. Seriously bad. Whenever a cult was involved in anything, it could only be so much worse than anticipated. Of course, her parents wouldn’t let her talk about it. Who would ever want to talk about something like this? Being part of a cult, if now or in the past - with everything happening these past years. 

“We need to speak to her parents. Now.” Hyunwoo is already out the door, probably heading to his car and you look over at the rest of your team, who all seem more or less as lost as you. It turns out to be Seokmin who follows your team leader first and once you see his figure speed past you, you also begin to move. 

The ride is quiet. Hyunwoo’s hands are white around the steering wheel. You sit next to him in the front, Seokmin in the back. All of this feels surreal to you and you are sure it’s not that different for Seokmin. Serial Killers were a constant part of both of your lives, but you - you haven’t been for a good amount of years. It’s like a bad taste in your mouth, as if somehow the food you would always cook perfectly suddenly went bad, had a foul ingredient in it, was cooked for too long. You’re not sure what it is, but it doesn’t sit right with you. 

Seokmin, in the back seat, feels about the same as you. He is used to gruesome murders, to killers who don’t care about anything but themselves, but he isn’t used to having you around in all of this. Someone from his old life that he doesn’t associate with any of this. Never in a million years would he have predicted you becoming a federal agent. When you dated back in high school, you had always talked about wanting to go into politics, fighting for women’s rights, feminism, all that jazz. You had even applied to all the IVYs, wanting to study political science. So, how did you end up here? 

“We will have to be careful.” Hyunwoo now breaks the silence and makes Seokmin and you look at him.

“The parents won’t be too happy to share their story, I can imagine. No one likes to admit they were in a cult, not after Manson.” 

You nod and Seokmin scoffs, leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms. 

“One would think people wouldn’t even join any cults after Manson,” he says and Hyunwoo laughs bitterly, nodding slightly as he takes the next right at the intersection.

“Right. Sadly, it isn’t as easy as that.”

You look at Seokmin through the rearview mirror, watch how his jaw is tightened and how his arms are crossed, how his suit jacket is discarded next to him on the backseat. You wonder how long he has been part of this lifestyle, how long he’s been a cop. You hadn’t heard from him in years, not even when your friends offered to do some digging for you. It wasn’t because you weren’t interested. More so because you felt like you would get too invested. Looking away again, you straighten out your shoulders. This isn’t the time to think about the past, there are way more important things to focus your energy on. 

Five minutes later, Hyunwoo finally parks the car in front of the house of the Roger’s and the three of you get out to walk over to the front door where Hyunwoo rings the doorbell twice. It only takes about twenty seconds before the door opens and a slim woman with bright red hair and red lips stands in front of you, an apron around her waist and a mitten in her hand.

“Yes?” She looks at you with blinking eyes and the three of you take out your respective badges. The woman’s eyes widen. 

It is safe to say that getting information out of Jean’s parents is almost impossible. They are a middle class family with middle class friends, he works in real estate and she does her best to keep the house and children under control. They don’t want to talk about their past at the church, or more like, they try to deny it ever was a part of their lives. Talking to them comes close to talking to a wall, if the wall felt guilt and shame and was worried about its reputation. Only when you mention Jean for the third time, reassuring her parents that they aren’t in trouble and that no one was going to find out, that the only mission you had was to find the missing girl and find out who had killed the other innocent women - they budge. 

Mr. Rogers gets up, a certain shake in his knees, and walks over to one of the dark hardwood dressers standing on the right side of the spacious living room, where he opens a drawer and takes out what looks like a little notebook. You, Hyunwoo and Seokmin look at him attentively. 

“We haven’t talked to anyone from that church in years. Or well, we hadn’t. Up until a few weeks ago. You see, there used to be this… this farm. It was for retreats, we would go there every other month. Sing and pray, meet new people from other parts of the country,” he begins to explain as he walks back, reluctantly handing the notebook to you. Taking it with a small thank you, you look at the page he had opened it to and see a number and a name. 

“This is the name and telephone number of the couple that bought the farm years ago. We- we haven’t been going to the retreats since 1961, but a couple weeks ago an old acquaintance from the church called us. Kathryn Anderson, she was pretty close to Pastor Brix-,” he stops himself mid sentence, “to, uh, to Mr. Brixley. She wanted to know if we knew who bought the farm.” “And what did you tell her?” Seokmin asks now. 

“He told her no. That we were never interested in knowing,” Mrs. Rogers now answers the question for her husband, “you see, when we left the church it was mostly because of Jean. We figured after a while that perhaps this church wasn’t what we wanted for our daughter. So, we left. It wasn’t easy, but we did it. A couple months later, the whole thing fell apart anyway. Kathryn wasn’t around for that because she had been arrested about six months before we left the church. Got a good couple of years behind bars for attempted murder, the woman. When she got out, she couldn’t reach anyone - after all, the church didn’t exist anymore. Jonathan had perished, no one knows where he ended up and she was unsure what to do. So, she finally got a hold of us and wanted to know everything about the farm. But again, we told her we didn’t know who bought the farm. We just told her it was over and that she needed to find a different safety net.”

You look over at Hyunwoo, wondering if he thinks the same thing you do.

“But you obviously do know who owns the farm now.” He says calmly. The housewife swallows, then nods.

“We do. Paul actually sold the farm to them.”

How convenient, you think. Hyunwoo smiles and Seokmin clicks his tongue.

“I see. Well, thank you for the name and number, but now it would be great if you could also let us know the address.”

“I don’t understand,” you say, your arms crossed in front of your chest. Hyunwoo is sitting at his makeshift office desk, rubbing his temples.

“What exactly do you not understand, Y/N?” 

“Why we need to go to the farm. Or no, why he and I need to go.”

“Don’t be stupid, Y/N. Matthew confirmed it, the cult used this farm back in the day. There could be a lead there. And you and Detective Lee are going because you’re my best agent and he’s their best detective. I also feel like you two need some bonding time. Honestly, I’ve got no clue what your issue is with him, but you’ll need to get your act together. This is a serious case and I can’t have you dislike the main detective.”

Dislike. That’s one word to describe it. You bite the inside of your cheek. 

“So, you will drive to the farm with him and talk to the couple as well as check out the surroundings. See if you find anything that could be helpful to the case, got it?” 

“Yes, sir.” 

Hyunwoo nods, satisfied. He then waves his hand, telling you to get out and do your job. You suppress a sigh and instead walk out and almost into your newly assigned partner - Seokmin. He looks about as happy about the situation as you feel, but neither of you says a word while you walk out of the precinct and to the car that would take you the 100 mile drive to Schnecksville, Pennsylvania. 

“You drive.” Seokmin’s voice rips you out of your thoughts and you thankfully react quick enough and catch the keys he throws at you. Rolling your eyes, you walk over to the other side and open the car, sitting down in the driver’s seat. The second your door is closed and Seokmin’s door is closed, his presence almost drowns you. 

“I was always better at reading maps than you,” he mumbles next to you and you feel your cheeks heat up and your stomach turn and you decide to ignore him and instead start the car. 

Seokmin presses his lips together, the map on his lap and his heartbeat loud and clear in his ears. Bream really thinks he did something. Putting Seokmin in a car with you for the next two hours. Apparently, your little bit of tension did not remain unnoticed and now this was his punishment. But what was he supposed to do? Tell Bream that you were his ex-girlfriend from high school who he had left seven years ago with nothing better than a pathetic letter goodbye. It hadn’t been his finest moment, but god, he was nineteen. Back then, he had enlisted in the army after high school, something he was bound to do anyways, and being cowardly as he was, he just hadn’t felt like telling you in person. Then, when he had been discharged, he had signed up for the academy and here he is now. He knows he should say something, apologize for the way he left you. But his pride and the shame don’t let his lips move, don’t let the words come out. And so he just looks at the map and waits to give you instructions. That’s what he can do. That’s how he can cope with being next to you. 

The drive is long and quiet and you turn on the radio at one point, listening to quiet music almost soothing. The highway is wide and the city is behind you and you wonder how long you’ll have to be in this car before your head starts to actually fume from all the thoughts running around. 

When you see the sign for Schnecksville, you almost sigh in relief. Seokmin tells you which exit you have to take and you follow his instructions, wondering how you actually got through this drive without any actual communication besides his directions. 

Schnecksville is filled with nothing and a gas station. You also pass a motel and a convenience store on your way to the farm that is a few miles away from the city center. Once you finally arrive, you can’t get out of the car quick enough, shoving the keys into your jacket when the car is locked. The farm is bigger than you had anticipated and Seokmin, who has discarded his jacket and hat on the backseat, looks just as surprised as you.

“Guess we have some ground to cover. Come on.” He takes the lead and you follow him, even though a part of you feels the need to run ahead. You don’t. You’re not a child. 

The woman who opens the door is in her early sixties with graying hair and a cat in her arms.

When you and Seokmin introduce yourselves and show your badges, she gasps slightly.

“Oh, you know, my sweet peach always runs out when I open the door, she is sick, can’t really find her way back when she gets out. Come on in, agent, detective.”

Her name is Mabelle Travis and her husband is Keith Travis, but he isn’t at home right now. He is getting some groceries for them. 

“How kind of your husband to help you with that,” you say as you sit down on the couch in the pastel colored living room. Mabelle nods, letting the cat back down.

“Oh, he is the one with the driver’s license, dear. I can only go grocery shopping if he comes with me. Or our son is in town.”

You nod and look over at Seokmin, who is looking at some of the family pictures on the dressers by the door. 

“Your son doesn’t live with you, ma’am?” He asks and Mabelle shakes her head as she sits down on one of the horrifically green armchairs. 

“No, Detective. He used to, you know, live with us. But that was before we bought the farm. My husband always dreamt of having a farm. When he retired, he thought it might just be the time.” She laughs and looks from Seokmin to you.

“But, what can I do for you?”

“Well, we were wondering if you’d be alright with us looking around the farm? We don’t know if you know, but the farm used to belong to a church before you bought it.”

“Ah, yes. We did know. I think that’s why we got it cheap. What exactly are you looking for, agent?”

“We’re not sure. But we think the church might have some connections to a case we are currently working on.”

Mabelle nods, her face in a frown. 

“Oh my. Well, you’re in luck then. We bought the farm years ago, but only recently moved in. So, most of the barns are still untouched. Only this house has been through some construction,” the cat jumps up on her lap and Mabelle smiles down at it, her hand carefully caressing its fur.

“That’s good news, Mrs. Travis. We’ll go take a look then.” Seokmin nods his head towards the back door and you smile at Mabelle before getting up and following Seokmin outside. There are three barns in total - one is large and two are on the smaller side, leaving the two of you with enough ground to work with for the next few hours. You exchange looks and decide to check out the smaller space first, a barn that is completely bare except for a wooden table at the far right that holds a few blueprints. Seokmin checks them out, his eyes scanning them for anything out of the ordinary. You, meanwhile, begin to knock at the wall, listening for hollow spaces, but also come back with nothing. The barn seems as normal as a barn could be. 

The second one is a little trickier. It’s not empty, instead it’s filled with boxes that, after checking as good as each and every one, all seem to be empty. You check your wrist for the time, wiping your forehead with the back of the other hand. You’ve really been at it for the last two hours. 

“I think we should move on to the last barn. I doubt the rest will hold anything of worth. Come on.” Seokmin is next to you all of a sudden and you flinch, looking away from your watch and at the man, who has sweat dripping down his temple. His eyes are set on your face and you wonder if you look just as exhausted as he does. Clearing your throat, you nod and turn away from him, walking out of the barn and to the next one. 

Seokmin sighs, following you outside and grabbing your arm once he catches up with you. 

“Y/N, I am just as delighted about doing this with you as you are with me, believe me. But perhaps we should at least try to do our job.” 

His words sting more than they should have and you are well aware of that. Funny to think that such wounds would have healed after seven years. You shake off his hand and turn around to face him.

“Oh, is that right, Seokmin? You’re just as delighted as I am?” You raise your eyebrows at him. “As far as I can remember, Detective, you left me with nothing more but a joke of a letter.”

Seokmin bites down on his tongue. You are right. Maybe it wasn’t right of him to compare the two of you.

“I know that. I know I hurt you. And I should have apologized for that years ago. I was young and-,”

“Let me guess? Stupid? That is in fact correct, Seokmin. But I don’t care about an apology, at least not anymore. I just want to get this over with, not have chit-chat with you about the past which neither of us can change anymore. So, will you go to the third barn with me so we can finally leave this stupid town?”

Seokmin watches you walk away, his heart heavier in his chest than before. He really should have reached out sooner. Pulling a hand through his hair, the detective suppresses another sigh and finally follows you to the third and last barn for you to check. 

The Travises invite you for dinner and Seokmin and you are both too polite to decline. Thankfully Mabelle is incredibly talkative, loves telling you all the tales about their son, Henry, and how they used to live in the city but then moved to a smaller town. She is excited about her husband’s birthday coming up soon and Henry coming over to visit, and basically her favorite topic to discuss is him. You try your best to resist the urge to look over at Seokmin next to you, to see if he is as amused about this as you are. He is not your ally, not your friend. You shouldn’t be looking for his gaze, shouldn’t be curious of his thoughts. 

“Does your son visit you often?” Seokmin now asks after taking a sip from his glass filled with tap water. 

“Not as much as we’d like.” Mrs. Travis sighs and pats her husband’s hand.

“He is busy with working in the city, not always available.” Mr. Travis now explains and Seokmin and you nod. That makes sense. You try to remember the last time you had time to visit your own parents. You couldn’t even really remember. 

“If there is something we want to check again, would it be alright if we came back?” Seokmin asks when you finally stand at the front door, saying your goodbyes. The Travises nod, allowing you to come back whenever. After waving at them you walk back to the car, Seokmin now getting into the driver’s seat. As you sit down on the passenger seat the atmosphere quickly becomes tense now that you’re alone again. The second your doors are closed, a familiar sound is heard.

“Oh, you’ve got to be joking.” 

Rain. It’s starting to rain. What starts with a few drops on the windshield turns into a full on piss of rain that has the both of you staring at the scene for a few seconds. When a second later you hear thunder so close it almost shakes the car, Seokmin reluctantly starts the engine.

There is no way in hell you can drive home in this weather. As much as the both of you hate it, you’ll have to stop somewhere and wait out the storm. Seokmin suggests the motel you had seen on your way here and you nod, knowing there wasn’t much else you could say or do. Having to stay somewhere with Seokmin, somewhere you couldn’t just flee from, seems like the number one worst scenario you could find yourself in. You look at him from the passenger seat, trying to my sly about it but of course he notices your eyes on his face.

“Believe me, I would rather not do this either, Y/N. But I’d rather be safe than drive on the highway in this weather.”

You don’t answer him. Mainly because you would have to tell him he is right and that’s most definitely not going to happen. 

“What do you mean by that?” Seokmin looks at the bored looking woman in her fifties. She sighs and shoves the one room key towards him again. 

“I mean, Sir, that there is only one room left. We are fully booked. Have you seen the rain?” 

It’s very obvious a rhetorical question but Seokmin is about to go on a rant to tell the woman that, of course, he has seen the rain but how on earth does this justify there only being one room in a god damn motel miles away from any big city? 

“We’ll take the room,” you quickly interject, handing the lady your credit card that she looks at with a straight face.

“Honey, you’re in the middle of nowhere. Do you really think we take those things?” You feel your cheeks heat up, retreating the card again.

“That’s 16.50$ for the night,” she continues and you hand her a twenty that she takes without a word, shoving the change over the wooden surface, “have a pleasant stay.” She shoves down the small plastic window and you and Seokmin exchange a quick look before making your way to the room you will now have to share. 

There is only one bed. You stare at it and so does Seokmin. Because - of course there is. How could you have not asked the woman at the counter? But then again even if you had… there wasn’t much you could have done about it. Maybe a saw, you think, just saw it in half. The two of you stay silent for a good minute, before Seokmin finally sighs, pulling a hand over his face. 

“Looks like we can’t do much about this. Just… it’s just one night, alright? We can do this.” 

You don’t really understand why he would say that. Why he would speak for you, when you both know it isn’t okay and you most definitely can’t do this. You take a deep breath, throwing your bag onto the very dirty looking armchair next to the door. 

“Whatever,” you respond, rolling your eyes as you make your way into the bathroom, if only to get away from Seokmin for a short while. His presence is stressing you out more than you thought it would. Perhaps that had been foolish of you - thinking this wouldn’t be the absolute worst thing to ever happen. But at the same time, it’s not like Hyunwoo had given you much of a choice. He had straight up told you to get your act together and yet… You sigh, the door closed next to you. The bathroom isn’t even half as bad as you had feared. It’s small and the shower could need a scrub (or three), but other than that it’s decent. The toilet looks clean and the mirror hanging over the sink shows you your exhausted face. Dark circles under your eyes that you touch with your cold finger tips. You remember how you looked back in High School. How much you smiled, how happy you were almost every single day. And all because of him. He, who promised you the world only to rip it away when you needed stability the most. It wasn’t fair. Him being here, him playing such a big role in something so important to you. Finding this killer that took lives like it was nothing. Seokmin is here with you and he sure as hell isn’t going anywhere else. The effect he has on you is annoying, to say the least. You don’t want to feel this way, feel insecure and small and like you need to prove yourself to him. He isn’t worth your energy, your thoughts. Not him as a person at least. Him as a Detective is a different story. Another deep breath followed by some water that you splash into your face, is what finally makes you step out again and face your ex-boyfriend that has taken a seat on the bed, the case file spread next to him. 

He is handsome. High cheekbones, perfectly shaped eyebrows. His hair is styled back, but slowly the front strands are falling into his face. His face is in a small frown as he looks at the documents, as he tries to make sense where you all fail to find any. Your heart betrays you by skipping a beat, by suddenly sending a wave of sadness over you. He never told you why he left. He just did. 

“Anything making more sense now?” You ask cautiously, walking over to him with slow steps. Seokmin looks up slightly before shaking his head. 

“Not really,” he mumbles, “it doesn’t make sense. None of this. Why is he curving the crosses into their ears? Why is he choosing these girls specifically?” You sit down on the other side of the bed, gnawing on your lower lip.

“Well, Matthew told you our theory. Abusive mother, hatred towards women.”

“But why- why would he just go after any woman if his mother was a certain type?” Seokmin looks up at you and you feel a sting in your chest. You shrug.

“You’re right to question this theory. It’s not perfect and it will take a few years until we can really say that we have a high percentage of accurate profiles. So far we’ve been good, very good. But not as good as we can be. This unsub is unique because he doesn’t have a type - it almost seems random. Like he goes out on the street and sees a girl and just takes her,” you lick over your lips, letting your eyes wander to the window, the storm on full display, “he is violent, but he also kills them quickly. No signs of sexual abuse. It’s odd and not like anything we’ve seen before.”

Seokmin listens to you speak and allows himself to actually listen. The whole profiling thing - it most certainly hasn’t been something he trusted so far. But now, hearing your words, seeing the look on your face - he almost feels ashamed of his earlier suspicion. 

“It’s just-,” he begins, his hand pulling through his hair, “it’s confusing. Why would he not go for people who look like his mother? Why is he not taking revenge on her over and over again?”

You feel your thoughts stumble over that sentence for a good thirty seconds. Seokmin is right - why wouldn’t he take revenge on his mother over and over again? Why would he kill women that look nothing like her? Without really noticing, you get up, your feet carrying you over to the window, staring at the rain outside, hoping it would give you the clue you so desperately need right now.

“You agree, don’t you? That it is odd!” Seokmin gets up too, only to turn around and look at the files again, his arms crossed, eyes scanning all the pictures and clues the team has gathered so far. 

“Yes, it definitely is odd,” you mumble, heart racing in your chest. 

“Okay. We’ll go over this again. There has to be something we’re missing. A connection between them, a club they all go to. Anything, just… fuck, it feels as if there is clue right there, hidden in plain sight and we are missing it because it’s too damn obvious!”

Hidden in plain sight. You blink against your reflection in the window. Hidden in plain sight. Matthew had said the same thing back at the precinct. 

For all we know, they could be hiding in plain sight and we wouldn’t know.

You swirl around, eyes wide and Seokmin looks at you with a confused expression. 

“What?” 

“The barn,” you breathe, eyes flickering to the table, where the car keys lay right where Seokmin left them, “we need to go back.”

Seokmin tries to stop you, the storm still howling outside, but you’re not letting him. This is too important, too obvious. You want to kick yourself for not realizing it earlier. For seeing something that was right there, but not actually seeing it. 

You run to the car, soaked from head to toe when you sit down on the driver’s seat. The door to the passenger seat opens and Seokmin plops down, just as drenched as you are.

“Jesus Christ, Y/N, will you tell me what the fuck is happening right now?”

Instead of answering, you start the engine, the wipers doing their best to clear your view.

“Y/N!” Seokmin repeats loudly and you let out a breath you hadn’t even realized you were holding.

“It has to be in there! In the barn. All those god damn empty boxes. One of them has to have something in it, something they don’t want us to find. Fucking hell, we could have had the whole team here by now, Seokmin! If only we hadn’t been lazy!”

“Wait, hold on. So you think the Travises have something to do with this?” Seokmin asks and you shrug.

“Honestly? I don’t think they do. But it’s still their property now. And most of these boxes are theirs. I’m sure we’ll find something there. We just have to look at every single box.”

You’re almost in a haze, Seokmin thinks. Your eyes have completely changed and the way you drive this car would have been scary if only you weren’t so damn impressive. You have been impressive the whole day, Seokmin thinks. He would never say it out loud (not to you at least) but this job seems to fit you like a glove. Never did it cross his mind back in High School that you’d end up in the same field as him. He gulps down the nostalgia and instead looks out the window, wondering if the rain will stop anytime soon. 

It hasn’t been long since the two of you left the Travises and yet, when you arrive, the house is dark. Checking your watch you see it's already after 9pm. 

“They said we can come back whenever.” You say more to yourself than Seokmin, but the latter still nods, cursing under his breath when he steps out of the car and into the horrible weather. You run alongside him, passing the house and first barn, setting foot in the one you had a hunch about with both of you drenched from head to toe. Ignoring the cold creeping up, you begin examining the boxes once again. There is nothing extraordinary about them. They are the usual cardboard boxes one uses for moves, all over the country. It’s nothing you haven’t seen thousand of times before and-

“Y/N, look at this.” Seokmin’s voice fills the silence that has only been accompanied by the sound of rain and thunder before. Looking over at him, you see that he is holding up two different boxes upside down. There is a green dot on both of them. Your eyes widen. Quickly, you check your own box - but nothing. There is no dot. Confusion mixed with frustration begins to rise within you and you throw the box to the side, pulling clam hands through wet hair. 

“There has to be a system,” you mumble, closing your eyes as you try to calm yourself down. Seokmin hears your words and looks around the room, trying to make sense of how the boxes are lined up. They all look the same. They were all stacked the same when you came in earlier today. There isn’t anything about them that makes one different from the other - except for the dots he had discovered. His brain is working at full speed, his eyes roaming from one side of the room to the other. Only when he looks down, does he see something.

“Y/N, look,” he puts the two boxes he held up to the side and crouches down, your figure standing over him a second later. There were clear lines painted on the floor. He looks up at you and you feel your eyes beginning to shake, as you move as quickly as possible, shoving more boxes to the side and focusing on the floor. And yes, only a few moments later you find yet another line, one that contains boxes with more dots - orange ones. But it doesn’t stop there. Seokmin finds another line and boxes that, once again, don’t have a dot. He wants to pull his hair out, but once you begin looking at the boxes with him, your gaze full of determination, he calms down. Together, the two of you turn over every single box until, after what feels like hours, you let out a gasp. The box you’re holding now doesn’t only have a red dot on it - it also contains something. Seokmin is next to you right when you pull out the small key that makes both of you almost jump in glee. Your hunch had been right. Now all you had to do was find where the key belonged. Your eyes met and without words, Seokmin went to the left side of the room and you to the right one, both of your hearts beating at rapid speed at this point. Neither of you wants to or will leave this place until you find whatever door is hidden behind the wooden planks decorating the walls. Your hands flew over them, knocking to hear a hollow sound, anything that would indicate there being a hidden space. Nervous sweat was now mixing with the rain on your face, the earlier cold all forgotten thanks to the adrenaline you were feeling. 

“I got something!” Seokmin suddenly yells after a few minutes and you immediately turn and run over to him, seeing him break the wall free of the plank. Just that there is no wall. It is a thin wooden door with a small lock that looks like it was made for the key safely stored inside  the pocket of your jeans. Without any hesitation, you move forward, key back in your hand after pulling it out, and reuniting it with its lock - the door clicking open a second later. Seokmin and you look at each other again before you push the door with your hand, it easily swings open for you and Seokmin to see a narrow hallway led down by an old looking staircase. There is a string hanging down from the ceiling which Seokmin pulls on, lighting up the hallway for you to see more clearly. 

“Well, let’s go,” you say and Seokmin nods, both of you with one hand on your gun belts as you walk down the stairs, all the way down to a door that, thankfully, isn’t locked. Pushing this one open as well, you are met by another hallway, longer this time, with three doors leading to different rooms on each side. You feel adrenaline rush through you as you begin walking, Seokmin right behind you. The first two doors lead to empty storage rooms, you taking the ones on the left, Seokmin on the right. Your hands feel clammy and your senses are all heightened as you continue to the next door, opening it at once and checking the insides carefully, gun in your hand. No one is in there - but it’s also not empty. 

“Seokmin!” You call out and the man is beside you right then, eyes scanning the room. It’s an office, or at least it appears to be. Right on the wall across from you hangs a portrait of a beautiful landscape and only barely hides a very obvious closet of some sorts. You shove your gun back into your belt and walk straight up to it, while Seokmin goes to examine the desk standing at the left side of the room. He pulls out a pair of gloves from the inside pocket of his jacket and pulls them over his fingers before he begins to open each and every drawer. 

“There isn’t much dust around here,” you suddenly say and Seokmin looks over at you.

“What do you mean?”

“Someone comes here regularly. Cleans it of dust, keeps the floors clean.” You look around for a moment, then your focus is back on the painting hanging over the closet. Your hands are also wrapped up in a pair of gloves and you move slowly as you grab the edges of the frame to heave it off the wall. It occurs to you that the last time someone was here, they hadn’t succeeded in putting the painting back into its usual spot. You can tell because it comes off the wall without any problems, having been crooked from the beginning on. Now, you lean it against the wall next to you, before your hands open the closet. 

“Is something in there?” Seokmin walks over to you now, nothing interesting inside the desk.

Once he comes to a halt next to you, he feels himself gasp. There is a whole shelf with files that seem to be alphabetically organized. Your heart beat speeds up once more as you grab a random file (Br-Bu) and open it. 

“That-,” Seokmin’s eyes widen. As you continue staring at the page, he moves to pull out more of the files. He brings them over to the desk and opens them one by one, until he finds all the names he has been looking for.

“Broshard, Cartwright, Franco, Rogers, Twain and White.” 

Seokmin and you are staring at the files. It was all of the girls’ parents. They had all been part of this cult before. It made sense, of course it did. And yet, having it here, black on white, was still a shock. This meant their connection had been right there, so easy to grab, and none of the parents had thought about sharing this with the police. You lean against the desk, hands pulling through your damp hair. Seokmin’s hands are propped on his hips, his eyes reading over the names over and over again. 

“We have confirmation now,” he states, “we need to call the precinct.” He looks over at you and you nod, your hands still resting in your hair. Worry rushes through Seokmin and he finds himself standing in front of you a second later, his hands around your wrists to bring your hands back down softly.

“We will get him,” he says then, eyes boring into yours, “we will get him and he will be punished, Y/N, I promise you.”

It’s unprofessional, he knows it and so do you. You don’t ever promise to catch a killer. 

“Why didn’t the parents tell you?” Your voice is quiet and Seokmin sighs, shrugging. His hands are still holding you.

“I don’t know. Shame, fear? Whoever is doing this is a cold blooded murder, Y/N, they were probably scared he’d take even more from them.”

“More than a child?” You look up at him, letting the feelings that you’ve been holding back finally crack through. 

“I guess so? We will find all of this out tomorrow, we just need to get back to the motel and call the precinct.” 

He says the words but doesn’t move. Neither do you. You both stay right where you are, your eyes locked on each other. The air around you shifts, the exhaustion mixes with something you only have faint memories of.

“You are incredible, do you know that?” Seokmin whispers finally, “the way your brain works - it’s incredible. Admirable.” 

His body heat engulfs you, makes you feel hot and cold at the same time. You swallow down your doubts and instead let your heart do the talking.

“You’re just as incredible, Seokmin. All the work you’ve done in this case already… if it weren’t for you, we wouldn’t be here right now.”

Seokmin feels himself holding his breath as his one hand moves from your wrist to your fingers, interlocking them with his own while the other moves up, cupping your cheek, thumb caressing the side of your chin. He feels your skin, the softness he remembers better than he wants to admit. 

Neither of you is sure who does it. Who dares to close the distance. But you’re kissing, his lips warm and familiar on yours. Your arms move by themselves, wrapping around Seokmin’s neck as he deepens the kiss, his tongue licking over your bottom lip slowly, asking for entrance that you give him without any hesitation. He kisses better than he did back in high school and his hands are more experienced, moving down and up to grab your hips and hoist you on top of the desk, standing in between your legs now. You grab his face, your tongue licking against his, feeling the stress and discomfort of the day leave you with every touch of his skin. The kiss grows more and more desperate, both of you panting against each other and only after a good five minutes do you part, his hands in your hair and yours on his nape.

“We should get out of here,” he mumbles against your lips then and you nod, letting him help you down the desk.

This time the drive isn’t awkward. It’s filled with something else, something you haven’t felt in so long. Not just regarding Seokmin - but in general. Your work is your everything and you and your team travel around the country more than you don’t. Wanting someone, feeling wanted by someone, this hasn’t happened to you in a while. Your gaze keeps wandering to the driving Seokmin, to the man that had once hurt you so much and now was the only thing you could concentrate on. 

“If you don’t stop looking at me like that I will park this car on the side of the road and not give a fuck about anyone seeing what I want to do to you, Y/N.”

His deep voice made your insides turn deliciously, the heat between your legs rising as you licked over your dry lips, eyes shaking as you nodded, averting your gaze from Seokmin’s intoxicating frame. As much as the idea excited you it also seemed like a stupid idea considering the motel really wasn’t that far away. 

It doesn’t take half as long as it usually would with Seokmin speeding down the road, finally parking the car in the parking lot, getting out of the car and opening the door for you, his hand around yours in no time as he leads you to the door, both of you drenched again when you step inside. But even with all the tension between you two, Seokmin walks over to the telephone on the wall, passing a young man who just seemed to have left his room to go outside. You present him with a nod when he smiles at you, quick to look at Seokmin again who is now dialing the number of the precinct. 

When he explains what you found, he speaks quietly and rushed, you by his side the whole time, holding his fingers between yours. The tension doesn’t subside, it only gets shoved to the side as Seokmin talks to his superior, who was still at the station at this time, waiting for your call. Your head feels dizzy, the situation bizarre but also somewhat addictive. The second Seokmin hangs up, knowing his colleagues will leave for Schnecksville as soon as the storm gets better, he wraps an arm around your waist and leads you to your room with hurried steps. 

The door falls shut behind the two of you and your body is pressed against it, Seokmin’s one hand skillfully wrapped around both of your wrists, pinning them over your head as he dips down to kiss you, his thigh pressing between yours. A moan escapes you, your hands wiggling under Seokmin’s grasp. He kisses you with the same desperation as before, his free hand underneath your shirt, fingers pressing into your skin. 

Nothing is inside your head except the need for him. You don’t want to feel anything but his touch, his kisses, the way his tongue feels against yours - hot and wet and perfect. He moves his arm around you again, picks you up as if you weigh nothing, carrying you over to the bed where he drops you, your eyes wide as you stare up at him. There is no light in the room beside the one coming from outside, making him look angelic. His carefully styled hair is falling into his face now, his lips red from your kisses. His pupils are blown out and the look in his eyes runs shivers down your spine. You watch as he gets rid of his jacket and belt, following his movement as you sit up a little bit, skillfully opening the belt with your gun and leaving it on the floor next to the bed, feeling the mattress move the next second as Seokmin lowers himself onto the bed. Your hands find his nape once more just as he presses his lips against yours again, hands roaming from your hips to your stomach and under your shirt, gripping your breasts one by one and moaning into your mouth when his thumb feels the stiff nipple underneath your bra. 

His tongue licks against yours again, your back arching against him as he moves to kiss down your neck, biting and licking and kissing all the same. When he hears your sounds, he feels himself growing harder, his composure almost breaking as he takes off your shirt with your help, shoving the cups of your bra to the side to dip down and suck your nipple into his mouth, your legs wrapping around his waist as you push him closer to you, teeth sinking into you bottom lip. It feels like electricity between you, the way he touches you sends shocks through your body in the best way possible. 

“God, I can’t believe I have you under me again, fuck,” Seokmin breathes against your neck now, his breath tickling you. “Been thinking about you so much, you know? About how much more I know now… how I can make you cum, baby, eat your sweet pussy and have you scream my name.”

His words send another wave of shivers down your body and you nod, wishing for nothing more than for your and his clothing to land on the floor. 

“Seokmin… just want you to fuck me, please, need you so so bad.” 

He groans, cock twitching and he finally moves to open his pants. It’s all hurried and a little bit frantic, the way you pull on his shirt next and the way your bra basically gets ripped off your frame by him. It drives you crazy, how he kisses you, pushing you further up the bed, your head hitting the pillow as he devours your lips and tongue, his hand squeezing your tits over and over, his stiff cock right there between your legs, still caged in by his briefs. 

“How bad do you want it, hm?” He breathes out, his fingers now moving downwards, ending up over your clothed pussy, making you squirm.

“Fuck, so bad, Seokmin. Please.” 

He sucks on the skin underneath your ear and lets his fingers shove your panty to the side, sliding through your wet folds and moaning against you. You’re so wet, wet and ready for him. 

“I wonder if you still taste the same, baby,” he mumbles, continuing to let his fingers glide through your lips, letting one of them sink into you. Your pussy practically sucks him in, eager to feel him inside. Seokmin kisses you again and your nails are dragging along his back as your hips move against Seokmin’s digit inside of you. 

“M-more, want more of you,” you cry out when you come up for air and Seokmin nods, letting a second finger slide in too, fully finger fucking you now as he smothers your neck with more kisses, preceding to suck marks onto the sensitive skin of your breasts, your whimpers becoming more and more frenzied. You need his cock and you need it now. So, you let your hand wander down, grabbing around the wrist of his hand that is currently fucking you.

“Want your cock, Seok… fuck me with your cock.” His eyes meet yours, gaze almost crazy as he curses under his breath, nodding before pulling his fingers out of you, bringing them to his mouth to suck them clean - making you whimper in the process. He licks his lips after.

“Still so tasty, baby… all for me.” 

He kisses you one more time, deep and emotional and dizzying, before finally ridding himself of his briefs and you of your panties, hand pumping his length a few times. You watch and swallow, remembering how he had felt back then. He had been your first. And now he was going to claim back what he had made his so many years ago. 

When he sinks into you, both of you cry out in pleasure, his arms on the mattress next to your head and his lips kissing your cheek, chin and lips. You are still hugging him close, fingers pressing into his nape and back. His first thrust is deep and slow and your eyes roll back, a long moan escaping your kiss-bruised lips. He can’t keep going slow, he knows that. As hard as he tries - he knows he won’t be able to control himself. Which leads to his thrusts becoming faster, to his moans becoming louder and your pussy clenching around him more often. It’s hot and wet and quick, it’s making you feel like you’re in a dream, his teeth sinking into your flesh, your cries spurring him on. Your legs are around his hips, his cock hitting you right where you need it to with every thrust and when you feel his hand sneaking in between you, thumb pressing down on your clit, rubbing it in perfect circles, you know you won’t last long. 

“You feel so good, baby, take my cock so fucking well.” He moves, on his knees in front of you now, your legs over his shoulders the next second. The new angle makes you see stars, especially with his thumb still on your clit.

“F-fuck, Seok! I’m so close.” Your cry makes him smirk, his movements becoming less and less controlled, as he is chasing both of your releases. You give up on keeping your eyes open, enjoying the way he feels, the way he hits you right where it feels so incredibly good. Your body is on fire, everything feels more intense and if you had the capacity in your brain you’d probably worry about exploding. 

And you do - you explode only a few seconds later, your orgasm hitting you hard, leaving you to cry out his name, nails back in his skin, leaving clear marks that he will be proud of later. 

“That’s right, baby, look at you, so pretty coming on my cock, fuck,” Seokmin feels you pulsate around him, feels how your pussy clenches over and over, milking him for all he has and there isn’t anything he can do but reach his own high, cum shooting out his cock and into your spent core. He collapses on top of you, your legs falling off his shoulders, spasming at the intensity of your climax. His breath is right there in your ear and you finally open your eyes again, fingers moving to stroke through his hair. You stay like this for a while, just catching your breath, feeling him so close after so long. Only when he slips out of you, laying down next to you, his lips pressing a kiss to your cheek, do you regain some senses. Smiling at him, you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom. 

When you come back out, Seokmin is asleep. Chuckling, you pick up his shirt from the floor and slip it over your head before laying back down, cuddling into his side and letting yourself drift off into a dreamless sleep. 

For Seokmin it’s not a dreamless sleep, though. It hasn’t even been two hours he’s been asleep when he wakes up, cold sweat covering his body. He looks down and sees you peacefully sleeping right beside him, one of your hands on his bare stomach, the other under your own cheek. In any other case he would have loved to look at you for as long as he could, but this isn’t like any other case. 

The man, he thinks, the man we saw yesterday. Seokmin gets up, careful not to wake you up, grabbing his underwear from the floor, just like his pants. You’re in his shirt so he has no other choice but to leave the room with his chest still bare. His feet carry him out the room and to the small entrance space, right to the phone where he dials Bream’s number again. The second someone picks up, Seokmin begins talking.

“It’s the son, Sir, the Travises son - he’s the unsub.”

The area in front of the farm hasn’t been this busy in years. There are cop cars everywhere, a S.W.A.T team is about to arrive. Seokmin has his hands pushed into his pockets as he talks to his superior officer. You are standing further away next to Matthew and Yuqi, listening to Hyunwoo’s orders. 

Seokmin had recognised the son, Henry, from the pictures at the house. You feel stupid for not realizing it sooner. 

“Don’t linger on those feelings, Y/N,” Hyunwoo says, “it had been a long day.”

Yes, a long day that ended with you being too horny to do your job properly. You don’t tell him that of course. Instead, you press your lips together and just nod. 

Henry is inside the barn now, the barn you and Seokmin found the secret door in last night. His parents and the missing girl, Kelly, are with him. It’s a classic hostage situation and yet even your team is at a loss of words. It all doesn’t make sense right now. Why is Henry doing this? You let your gaze flicker over to the barn, wondering what he is doing to them right now. 

The head of the S.W.A.T team is walking over to Hyunwoo now. They apparently arrived just now

“We are ready for your orders, Sir,” he says, shaking Hyunwoo’s hand. Your boss nods.

“Alright, thank you. I’ll let you know when you can go in.” The man leaves again after that and you look at Hyunwoo, unsure.

“We need him alive, don’t we?”

“In theory, yes. But it’s not always easy, you know that. Whatever is going on inside of him, we will only find out if we get him out, but we need to look at the bigger picture. We need to figure out what his deal is.”

Just then, Jungwoo arrives at the scene, carrying a white box. 

“You won’t believe this,” he says, putting the box on top of the police car next to you. Seokmin is suddenly next to you, his arm brushing against yours and making you shiver. You ignore the effect once again. 

“Henry Crawl, 36, was adopted by the Travises when he was 9 years old. It says here that his mother committed suicide and the Travises took him in - Mrs. Travis being is paternal aunt. She felt responsible for him, considering the father left right after his birth and his mother died.”

“So, they aren’t his biological parents. They didn’t mention that.” Seokmin frowns. 

“Which means that there is a chance his mother was part of this cult. Is there an autopsy report for his mum?” You take step closer to the box and Jungwoo nods, handing you the document. Scanning it, your eyes widen as suddenly the reason for all of this is starting to make sense. 

“There were signs of abuse - of years of abuse. Scars, bruises, internal damages.” You shake your head, “he isn’t killing women because he hates them. He kills them because he is avenging his mother.”

“She was part of the cult, probably around the same time as the parents of the girls. They probably knew about the abuse and he somehow figured it out.” Matthew chews on his bottom lip as he shoves his glasses up his nose. 

“We need to talk to him. Need him to let the girl go as well as his parents.” Hyunwoo looks over at the truck where all the special units are gathered. He excuses himself and goes over to them. The atmosphere shifts, there are nervous droplets of sweat running down your face. The storm might have stopped, but it’s still slightly drizzling down on you. Seokmin’s hand finds the small of your back. You flinch, your head turning to look at him wide eyed.

“It’s gonna be okay, we’re going to get them out of there,” his voice is soothing you, as much as you hate to admit it. You swallow down whatever you’re thinking and shake his hand off, before walking over to Hyunwoo and the special forces, leaving Seokmin behind.

“I want to talk to him.” Your voice breaks through the conversation Hyunwoo is having with the captain. Both of them look at you, eyebrows raised.

“Y/N-,” Hyunwoo starts, but you interrupt him.

“You know it has to be me. I am roughly the same age as his mother was back then. I am a woman. I know what is going on inside his head. Please, Sir, let me do this.”

If there had been more time, maybe they would have argued with you. But there isn’t any time. And so, they nod. As much as it makes you nervous, you also know that you’re right. You’re confident that you can do this, that you have the ability to save this girl and Henry’s parents. Taking a deep breath, you look over at Seokmin, who’s eyes speak more than a thousand words. He knows why you walked over there and he knows that you are the only one for the job. The smile on his lips reassures you more than you want to admit. 

Not even five minutes later you have a walkie-talkie in your hand. The other one landed in the barn roughly a minute ago. Now, you’re waiting for Henry to respond after your first attempt at contact. The rain is still falling softly, the sun nowhere to be seen in the sky. It’s early, you’re not sure how early, but you estimate it to be sometime after 6 am. 

“I won’t let them go!” The voice coming from the device in your hand brings you back to the here and now, blood rushing in your ears.

“Henry, hello, it’s good to hear your voice,” you say softly, looking over at one of the windows of the barn, wondering if he is watching you.

“I don’t- I won’t let them go,” he repeats and you lick your dried out lips.

“Okay, Henry. I hear what you’re saying, alright? You don’t want to let them go. Could you tell me why?”

“They need to pay for their sins!” It’s not hard to make out that he’s enraged, crying, but still hurt and confused. 

“What are their sins, Henry? Can you tell me?” You look over your shoulder at the rest of your team, Hyunwoo nodding at you and you nod back.

“You- you really want to know?” The shift in his voice tells you that your question had been exactly what he wanted to hear. 

“Yes, Henry. I want to know, I want to understand.”

There is silence on the other line for just a few moments. You remain calm and don’t ask again. It’s important you give him space, important for the hostages as well as to earn his trust. 

“They- they knew about my mum. My adoptive parents. I heard them say it. They knew why the police came to visit. It was because of her, because of mum. She was tortured by them, by the whole cult! And everyone who knew about it and didn’t do anything needs to be punished.” His voice is shaking as he speaks and you wonder if the hostages are in the room with him or if he has them hidden underneath the barn in one of the rooms you found last night.

“You’re doing this for your mum, Henry? You’re avenging her life?”

“Yes!”

“I understand. You did well, Henry. You hurt them the way they hurt you. They should have never taken your mother from you, Henry, that was wrong of them,” the words leaving your mouth aren’t what you’re actually thinking, but they will do the trick. Henry will trust you, he will listen to what you have to say.

“I- I did this for her. I wanted her to know I never gave up on her. B-but-,” he stops and you hear a sob, sure now that he is indeed crying. 

“But? You can talk to me Henry, I am here for you.” You bite your lip, hoping you’re not pressing the matter too far.

“B-but…,” Henry starts again, “but he- he betrayed me. He told me- he told me they were the only one’s at fault. He told me he wanted to avenge her too…”

He? You once again turn to your team, all of their faces in frowns. 

“Who is “he”, Henry?” 

No answer. Henry isn’t responding. You feel a slight panic arise inside of you. 

“Henry, it’s okay. You don’t need to tell me, okay? Just- tell me about you, about your mum. You must miss her dearly, right?” 

“My mum deserved better than what she got. She shouldn’t have killed herself, she should have fought through it! But she couldn’t. She was so scared of what they had done to her, what he had done to her! I wanted them all to suffer, wanted them all to know what it feels like losing someone they love. And I did that, I did that to him too!” He gets louder with every word. 

“Henry, you’re frustrations are valid. But, please, it is enough. You’ve showed them, you’ve hurt them. Enough people have died, Henry. Let your parents and Kelly go and you will be free.”

Henry is silent for a short while again.

“If he doesn’t respond, we’ll go in,” the S.W.A.T team’s leader is now saying to Hynwoo and latter holds up his hand, as if to signal to give it more time.

“Henry? Can you do that for me?” You ask again. Everyone is growing more and more uneasy, the more time passes. Your hands are sweaty and you feel like the rain isn’t the reason for why your clothes are damp again. Just when Hyunwoo is about to take his hand down, to let the special unit do their job - the doors of the barn open and Kelly runs out, the Travises right behind her. They all seem completely out of it but there are clear signs of relief on their faces. Seokmin and Stolper run towards them, helping them when they see, that Mr. Travis is limping and both women are spurting wounds on their face. You close your eyes and take a deep breath before pressing the button to talk again.

“Henry? Henry, are you there?” 

“My parents always loved me. They raised me when mum died. But they knew, you know. They knew! Which means, they need to suffer, too.” 

Your heart skips a beat when you throw the walkie-talkie to the side and run towards the barn, your team right behind you. You don’t think you’ve ever run as fast as you do right now. The air is tight around you and its rough to breathe. 

Henry is right there at the back of the barn, holding a gun to his head. You scream and Hyunwoo shoots forward to tackle him down - but it’s too late. The shot is heard but your eyes are closed, your knees growing weak but you stay standing. Henry is dead even before he hits the floor and there is nothing you can do. 

The hostages are free, so it counts as a win. The Manhattan Slasher is finally caught. He lays there, dead on the ground. He is getting carried away now, by two coroners who present you with a nod as you wait for Matthew and Jungwoo to come back upstairs. You hadn’t felt like you could go downstairs and see whatever Henry had left for you to find. 

You're sitting outside now, seeing Seokmin approach you, with a file in his hands. You look up at him, blinking against the rain. When he stands in front of you, it’s almost like the sun showed its face after all. He isn’t smiling, though. He just radiates this energy that immediately gets your spirits up.

“The judge,” he says, handing you the file, “it’s all in here. He was the one controlling Henry. Told him all those parents were the reason his mum suffered. And while it’s not all a lie - the judge himself was the actual perpetrator.”

With a slightly shaking hand, you reach for the file and open it, reading through what is evidence of Seokmin’s words. Now, this was something neither you nor your team has predicted. You swallow down a set of tears.

“He used Henry. But for what?”

“My guess is as good as yours, but, if I may try myself at your job: They probably got fed up with his shit. Told him they would rat him out to the police if he didn’t turn himself in for abusing that woman. He began killing their children as a way to keep them quiet. My guess is, that he has been keeping them quiet ever since Henry’s mum committed suicide and they all only recently began to wonder if maybe this was wrong.” 

Seokmin’s words reach your brain and they make sense as much as they don’t. You’ve been working this job long enough to know that there will never be something as full closure. People act irrationally all the time, do things no one understands. There is nothing you can do about it but wait it out, wait for the injustice to die down within you. In the end there is no point to try and understand people like this. Not that these parents deserved to have their daughters get killed. 

You thank Seokmin with a small nod and he sits down next to you. Next there will be the arrest of the judge. Then the parents will be questioned, and will get a punishment of their own because they didn’t stop the murders when they had the chance. You know they couldn’t because they were scared, but the law is clear. 

You feel Seokmin’s hand capturing yours and you look over at him. The business around the farm isn’t done yet. Boxes get carried and there is more forensic personnel than you’ve seen in a while, probably taking apart the basement you and Seokmin had found. It should be relief you’re feeling but right now you’re just tired. 

So, when Seokmin pulls you against him, arm around your waist, you don’t even try to stop yourself from laying your head on his shoulder and closing your eyes. 

header by @wongyuseokie.

[muffinlance]

State of the Muffin Report 2023-24

Happy belated birthday to my fanfics! Little Zuko turned six back in March. <3 

Behold, my annual roundup stats, because you can get fanfic from the math teacher but you can’t get the math out of the fanfic:

[id: Screenshot of an excel spreadsheet showing my 2023-24 word counts. Important info is that over six stories, I wrote 104k words, for a monthly average of 8.6k and a daily of 284 words. End id.]

Fanfic:

After not touching the birthday fic itself since 2019, Little Zuko v the World is finally finished! Woooo.

Otherwise, a slow-but-steady sort of year on the fanfic front.

Serious Face Writing & RL:

Li’s Friends has now raised $4,206.21 USD for wildlife charity, not counting gift matches. <3

Finished the second book in my original fic series, Fox’s Tongue; The Skin Stealer’s Son officially launched yesterday! (Affiliate link, so that if you happen to buy it, Amazon pays me extra money for the privilege.)

I also created a secondary tiny human, and she is a DELIGHT. She was last seen a half hour ago crawling after her brother like a particularly aggressive tripod, Hop on Pop in one hand, and slap-screaming at it until he read it to her. My children. <3

Year Six (2024-25) Goals

Fanfic: 

Gonna finish the new case of Dark Night in Ba Sing Se. Gonna finish it so good. (This is a donation fic for the winner of my Fandom Trumps Hate charity auction and is therefore due by the end of the year, so woo artificial timelines! Ah external motivations, how I missed you from my school days.)

I’m incredibly excited for Blindsiding Badgermoles, and have that same lovely external motivation in the form of my sensitivity reader, so planning to focus on that this year.

Finish the current book of Towards the Sun. We’re currently on the final field trip, so that should be very doable. —I say, using the exact same wording for the third year in a row. Honestly this one’s less a goal than a joke to see how many years it’s actually going to take me. And hey, I’ve been making progress! We now have the delight that is Lady Jun! Third year’s the charm?

Serious Face Writing & RL: 

Get a solid start on Fox’s Tongue Book Three, Face of the Wolf King.

Get out large print editions of the first two books.

Continue raising children.

Special thanks this year goes to First and Secondborn, who blessed me with the ability to still manage over 100k in a year, which is way more than I anticipated at this time last year.

Cheers,

MuffinLance

[mistresswriter19]

~ Until You Take Your Last Breath ~

Dr. Masacrik X Reader

A Psychocuties Fanfic

~ Pt 7~

Author's Note: Hello dearest readers I am coming back beyond the grave with more chapters coming you're way. Really appreciate the patience I have alot to tell for this fanfic and more lore learning about the world of Psychocuties and little reminder lots of mature audiences themes are coming away so your welcome to read but if you're uncomfortable fill free to read something else or different chapters. I'm really stoked that many enjoy this story and I promise create more~ reblogs, comments, are much appreciated!

Alright enjoy ^^

~ Chapter 7 ~

You eventually used to live in Russia but ever since the incident falling between you and your “ only “ friend Masacrik. It wasn't the same and your parents didn't feel safe in Russia anymore. You still care for them but they attend to being very pushy asking what you are going to be doing in your life. You were barely finishing high school but dropped out and yes they were disappointed. What you need to focus on is your mental health and try not to let those memories sink in. You had a vision of working in a company dealing with office work and meeting Masacrik again but you knew that wasn't true. For the record, why were you still thinking about him?

Y/N: Mom, Dad… I'm going back to Russia…

Parents: WHAT!?

Y/N: I need to find something there that I used to be doing. The C/N has been a true comfort but this isn't really my home…

M/N: We sacrifice a lot for you and now you just want to go back!?

D/N: Do you have no idea what the hell you're going to get yourself through!?

Y/N: This is why I can't talk to you guys about “ ANYTHING”!

M/N: Y/N!

Y/N: NO….I HAD IT…. You two don't really understand me… I try to be “ THE GOOD GIRL “ you want me to be, I obeyed, listen to your views, but what has that brought upon me. I don't have friends, you don't let me go out on my own, you don't care about my therapy thinking I'm crazy. YOU TWO ARE CONTROL FREAKS!!!

For the moment after finally standing up for yourself you felt a slap on your cheek making you fall on the ground as your mother looked in horror as if you were about to have a panic attack, felt disappointment and hurt what you have said to them. You couldn't take it anymore and wanted to start your own story with them not around .

You're father has too much anger building up inside but he then regret what he just did. You had tears fall down your eyes and ran up stairs locking the door falling on the bed screaming in pain until calm down a few mintues later.

Y/N: I can't do this anymore….

Laying back in bed with your legs up in the air against the bed frame most of the time you would read books from Russia that were considered a violation in that state. One of them kept you on your toes and bit your red lip of how good yet very grim writing one of them was called “ Lolita”.

Eventually falling asleep with a book in hand. The next day it was time to make the move, having your luggage in hand and using a taxi even though you're a starting adult it was still difficult to manage reality and its expectations. Your Mom and Dad eventually came to say one last goodbye and felt guilty from yesterday's spiral. You didn't want to be near them or bother but there your mother and father there blood…. You sigh turning back to them.

Y/N's Dad: We're not proud of the decisions you're making going back to the badlands your mother and I planned to escape for years but if that makes you feel like your home again. I can't stop you but promise me you'll write to us and let us know that you're safe….

Y/N: You two don’t have to worry or deal with me anymore, I’ll be okay.

With that said your parents both hugged you but you know deep down they were the kind of people who have a hard time warming up to others. Half of your innocence was taken by their “ Discipline Methods” leading to the point of breaking your true spirit facing the cruel world you attend to face. From taxi and hours in the plane you finally made it to Russia however you weren’t sure if you had access to your home, after hours of vomiting your brains out, the amount of tears pour down your face from your true emotions kicking for being alone, and hours flipping pages of your book you manage to settled down in a suite hotel.

Y/N: Just until I get my head straight and rest need..lots of rest.

You enter the suite it was pretty old fashion with the warm colors around the hall shades of red, orange,yellow and a dash of pink felt like walking into a art museum as you went to the front counter signing your name and have a hold of your temporary key, heading up the stairs and opening your door luggage on the floor as you manage to fluff pillow and lay your body all the way down, stretching your body and rest your eyes shut.

Rubbing your eyes you went down the stairs and went to explore the suite since you were not really in a rush to returning to your original house, fingers tapping the yellow concrete texture walls, shoes dragged when you hit a few carpets near different doors then that’s what curiosity got the best out of you. You leaned forward and saw a few plants and on top of that an elevator, then you looked near the hallways that seemed pretty dimmed and not much which felt strange since the only attention seeking was the elevator. Seems like any elevator that most people attend to hop on but what was uncertain for you was the hearts drawn on each line of the doors. Looking at the levels 1234567891011 as you take a step back, eyes leaning to the button had a red heart. What does this all mean to you? Your pressed your finger onto the heart as the elevator attempt to shaking along with your heart for some reason going in a presto chase making you breath heavy and face flushed keeping yourself together it felt like a roller coaster but so some reason you remember someone from the past but who was it if you heart just reacted.

Suddenly the elevator doors open as your hands folded your eyes were mesmerized with a very tall man wearing a bellboy vest, red hair, two strains out of place, red eyes seem that he was high or had lack of sleep but he grinned as your placing his hand on his chest and leans in your personal space as you raised on eyebrow. Then, Elevator Man extends his hand as a little greeting with the never ending grin he had on his face being hesitant you slowly place the palm of your hand that is until he swings you close to him and his gloved hand giving your rear a squeeze as you blushed from this unwanted attention with the elevator hand holding against your flushed cheeks but you had a vision wasn’t sure if this was you imaging things or it could be a hence warning for the next chapter. Instead of a bellboy vest uniform he was wearing a doctor coat and you were wearing a set of cat ears, dead skin along with a large collar seeming more like that you were a pet. You blinked again and everything was back to normal. For some reason you were confused but also trying to think for a moment that you swear you have seen this man before the little boy version of him.

You look back seeing Elevator Man with a part of his lap with hand . He looked at you with that Perverted grin as he snapped his fingers. For some reason you end up teleported onto his lap, your face flushed and annoyed at the same time. Your dress rolled up a little revealing more of your legs. As Elevator Man rest one hand close to his chin he couldn't help but check you out as you wince and turn the other way not knowing he pulled something behind your ear which was a scribbled cloud of fear making you feel blue and eyes watered as you attend to feel helpless at this point you felt Elevator Man hand on your cheek with his tongue gently licking your tears away.

Masacrik knew deep down it was you but he couldn't help realize how much you grew, how much he wanted to take and devour. He remembers you when you were small, innocent and filled with joy but something happened to make you change Masacrik to chuckle to himself thinking that he caused this and it pleased him. As the elevator goes to who knows when Elevator Man smiles looking how you were as he places a hand on your back making you grasp your hands on his chest annoyed you couldn't take it anymore as you raised your fits and immediately “ POW” hitting a few teeth and breaking part of his nose. Then you kicked him in the balls with your leg as he had his tongue out and went dizzy with the elevator ding you immediately hopped off and started to run down the stairs body painting as you felt like you were in danger encountering that man.

You made it back to your room you were staying in the suite hotel placing the pillow above your hear as you attend feeling your body tense.

You had a vision of yourself back that elevator face flushed as you felt your body onto Elevator Man's lap as he lean in trailing kisses around your neck, founding your chest, and rolling up your dress taking a good whiff of you making you whimper.

Elevator Man: You want me ~ and I seriously want you too~

He said while continuing leaving his marks around you tears down your eyes seeing that this is wrong you would never comply with this but how could he get you? You felt a wave of arousal hitting when he smiled finding out what you really wanted.

Elevator Man: Just give in to me dear promise I'll make this a “ ride of your life “~

You open your eyes and breathe heavily. Did you just have an intimate dream to that elevator Man who was nearly close to touching you!?

That smile worse than a creepy looking clown, those Crimson blood drop eyes something inhuman, those hands attending to pull you close and vein popping from the aggressive side and he didn't say a word all he did was toy with you. Would you see him again or the question is why was he like this. Why couldn't you stop thinking about him deep inside you feel his appearance staring down at you that Perverted grin you'll never forget. Maybe sleeping it off will make it go away.

Was it really safe to return home?

~End Of Chapter ~

[tippenfunkaport]

For today’s SPOP Appreciation Week prompt: Remember / Memory

My daughter drew this when she was 5 years old, shortly after we watched the first season of SPOP together in November 2018. Getting to watch this show as it aired with her is one of my fondest memories, especially since she didn’t just like it, this was the first thing she was full on OBSESSED with.

And when I say obsessed, understand that one of the baby’s first words was, “Faaaaacinating!” because she was mimicking her sister pretending to be Entrapta.

Background When She-Ra and the Princesses of Power premiered in 2018, my daughter was five years old, a few weeks from turning 6. She and I were already big ND Stevenson fans because we’d read the entire run of Lumberjanes together and, as an old school She-Ra fan, I was incredibly excited to experience the reboot with her. We watched it as it aired together and the main reason I wasn’t in the fandom during airing was because we could only watch one episode a night after her baby sister was asleep so I was trying to avoid spoilers.

I’ve talked before how watching it with her made it hard to hear a lot of the dialog (fast forward to me and my now tween watching Agatha All Along together recently and I’m pummeling her lovingly with a pillow because she still never lets me hear anything) but it was so absolutely worth it and it’s one of my all time favorite things I’ve gotten to share with her. SPOP is such ideal media for kids in general but specifically weird little girls and it means the world to me that she got to have this show.

Some random memories…

Once we finished a season, she would rewatch it over and over by herself. Her obsession was specifically with the Princess Alliance as a team (she’s an ensemble girlie like her mom, hence is why one of her other passions are the Champions from BOTW) so her favorites were No Princess Left Behind, Battle of Bright Moon and then, later, The Coronation and Mermysteries. (And System Failure because of Entrapta, obvs)

No Princess Left Behind was a cornerstone of her entire personality for a while there and whenever they had indoor recess at school, she would spend the entire time drawing up elaborate battle plans for the princess alliance.

Because there were no SPOP plushies in the beginning, she just reassigned her existing dolls as SPOP characters and would hold battle planning sessions with them constantly. (The only two I remember were Rapunzel as Perfuma and Cassandra as Entrapta because once “Entrapta” and “Perfuma” got stranded in a dimension where they were going to die and she had them say, “let’s transform back into Cass and Raps so at least we can die in love.” No one does deranged next level doomed yuri like a kindergartner.)

The show is rated Y7 in the US and when I explained that meant it was for 7 years old and up, she got the absolutely sinister grin of a child that is breaking the rules and said gleefully, “And I’m only five!”

The end of Season 3 was the first time she ever cried at a piece of media ever and I was convinced I was a terrible parent for showing it to her. :-(

After years of Netossa and Spinnerella being obscure toy collector trivia even most vintage She-Ra fans had never heard of, watching my Kindergartner run around playing as them was just a very fun moment for me.

She talked about and played SPOP with us constantly and when I finally got a chance to watch the show with daddy, he was like, “Hold on, do you mean to tell me I have been hearing about Entrapta for two years straight and somehow it never came up that her hair is ALIVE???”

We had a good two year span after the show ended when she was still just as obsessed as I was which really fed my own obsession since she’d suggest fanfics and posts for me to write. Then, as she started to move onto other things, fortunately “the baby” was now old enough to actually watch SPOP with me and I got to experience it all over again through her eyes.

But that’s a post for another time.

[miss-canon-event]

Lessons of the Heart (Ch.2) 📚💖

Chapter 2: Little do you Know

Single Dad!Miguel x Teacher!FReader

Summary: Being a father is not easy, and even less so when he is single. This is Miguel O'Hara's life, who has raised his daughter Gabriella alone after her mother's abandonment. Everything has been extremely difficult and challenging, especially now that they have to start over in a new neighborhood. Miguel barely has time for anything else besides his daughter and his job… everything changes a bit when he meets his daughter's teacher: you.

CW: different POV, mentions of bullying and xenophobia, mild angst, sad children, blaming, mentions of OF, Miguel is kinda shitty, not use of Y/N, only a last name, mentions of nudity. (Let me know if I forgot something, pls)

Divider by: @cinemabeans

A/N: Finally, after long weeks I am able to bring you the update of my crazy fanfic. A thousand thanks to all the people who commented, reposted and most of all, interacted <3 it means a lot to me that you've been so kind to me. I was scared to death and anxious, but I know I count on very nice people to bring this idea forward that little by little is taking shape hehe. Take care and see you next time!

As always, thanks a lot to @miss-tarja , who had been helping me to improve and also, she has giving me advice in order to be a better writer and oc, to keep writing this fanfic 💚

The long hallway felt longer and colder than it really was. Both girls felt as if the floor might disappear beneath their feet.

How many children get sent to the principal’s office on their first day of school? Many.

But because of a fight? Very few.

Gabriella and Emily kept their little hands intertwined, as if they were walking through a dark and cold place, and their only light was each other.

Her brown eyes stared at Emily, who walked while looking down at her feet. Then, she looked at your back — your ponytail swinging rhythmically with your steps.

You hadn't been cruel or cold. However, the girls needed to explain themselves. They probably deserved a small "punishment," just like the other 5th grade children.

Finally, they reached the huge door with a sign that read "PRINCIPAL".

Gabriella swallowed hard and squeezed Emily’s hand again — and Emily did the same.

His leg bounced the whole day. Since Miguel was called by a woman from Gabriella's school, he hadn't felt calm.

He had spilled his mug of coffee over the desk by accident. He had missed his lunch time.

It was incredible how nervous and upset he was. 

"Your daughter was in the middle of a slight bullying incident."

"We need to have a word once the classes are done."

Those were the words he could remember from that calling. Probably the principal or a secretary.

He took a deep breath and looked at the clock on the wall. It was almost time and Gabriella will finish her classes for today and he must go for her. 

But now... his priority is to find out what happened. Why was Gabriella taken to the principal's office on her first day at school?

“Canija…”

Miguel mumbled and while he turned off his computer, he gathered his belongings.

The road towards the school had been eternal, but he was almost there. Miguel saw the huge building from afar and the many parents waiting for their children. He parked his car and with firm steps, Miguel walked to school.

He didn’t know why he was so worried.

He was afraid of failing as a father.

It was threatening for him thinking that perhaps he wasn’t “perfect” as people at college or in his old job claimed.

Slapping himself mentally, he decided to push all those insecure thoughts out for now and focus entirely on seeing what mess his daughter had gotten herself into.

With the help of the receptionist, who escorted him to the office, Miguel entered a large, well-lit room. At first glance, it didn’t look like a traditional office. It was more like a common room divided by cubicles. In one corner, there was a small table with several chairs around it, probably used for quick meetings or students to wait. Near the back, there was a cubicle a little larger than the rest, with a neat desk and, on the wall behind it, the school’s emblem hung proudly.

Inside that room were several adults, who appeared to be the parents or caregivers of the other children involved. However, that was the least of Miguel’s concern at the moment.

Miguel just wanted to know how Gabriella was and what had happened.

“Papito…” 

Gabriella’s soft, trembling voice reached his ears. The girl, together with another little girl with braided hair, was sitting on a bench.

Miguel walked steadily towards them, feeling the judgmental stares of the adults present.

“Gabi, what happened?”

“Papito, I swear it wasn’t my intention-”

“Gabriella, you know we don't keep secrets not lie to each other. I need you to tell me why I'm being called here." his voice was severe and soft at the same time.

“Papito, yo-”

“It’s your first day of school, Gabriella”

“I know, dad. But… they started to mess with me. They told me I was a spic… and then they started to mess with Emily too.

Miguel looked at the girl with braids. Her freckled cheeks were red, as were her eyes. He also noticed that she and Gabriella were holding hands.

Then everything started to fall into place…

But something kept bothering him. Where were the adults? The teachers? Why didn’t anyone intervene before those children insulted both girls? There were supposed to be teachers watching, responsible adults taking care that the children didn’t get into trouble.

Trying to remain calm, he turned his focus back to his daughter.

“¿Le dijiste a tus profesores?”

Gabriella nodded.

“Si, pero la directora dijo que no había sido la manera…”

Miguel sighed for what felt like the hundredth time and nodded.

He hadn’t liked that call from the school staff one bit.

“Thank you for coming here, dear parents," said the principal—a tall, slender woman with sharp gray eyes and short, straight hair. She was a very elegant woman. “As we explained by phone, your children were involved in a bullying incident, which we cannot tolerate. It was only the first day of school, and the children were already displaying inappropriate behavior."

The parents were there with their respective children.

Even you were present, perhaps to give your point of view on what had happened.

“According to our teacher, Miss Hayes, she witnessed Miss O'Hara pushing young Davis. Miss Veronica was going to respond, but she intervened.” the woman read the report she had written previously that meeting.

Miguel felt his blood boil and tightened his grip slightly on Gabriella's shoulders. But he wasn't angry at her—he was angry at that teacher.

“However," the woman continued, “according to Emily's testimony, they were sitting quietly when Daniel Davis and company came over to bother them and said very mean things. Is that correct, Emily?”

The little girl with braids nodded.

“Very well," the principal said, placing the document report on her desk.

“While we don't tolerate bullying in any form, we will also not accept offensive or xenophobic comments.”

A blonde woman sitting next to the girl Veronica interrupted.

“Excuse me, Principal. You know how children are. They're at an age where they experiment and… well, being around children who are different from us… tends to—"

“Mrs. Clark..." you said in a tone that clearly meant “Watch what you're about to say.”

“With all due respect, Mrs. Clark. Xenophobic comments are not just childish behavior. And I repeat, it is something we will not tolerate.”

The blonde woman fell silent, though her eyes showed she wanted to say more.

“As you know, this can't go unpunished. According to our rules, this is grounds for temporary suspension.”

The children looked at one another, and Gabriella and Emily did the same.

“However, since it's the first day of classes, we've decided they will only receive a small punishment. It will be determined by each homeroom teacher. Daniel, Veronica, Marcus, and Tobias will be handled by Mr. Evans. Gabriella and Emily by Miss Hayes.

Miguel felt like he could breathe again and nodded. Gabriella also calmed down a bit. She was frustrated and sad.

“Please wait outside. I need to speak with Mr. O'Hara in private.”

All the adults, including you, left the office. However, you couldn’t ignore how intently those red eyes were fixed on you.

You didn’t know if it was resentment… or prejudice.

Once outside, you took both girls to a more secluded spot. They were a bit shaken and needed to get away from that environment.

You wanted to say something to Gabriella. When you saw her for the first time, you thought it would take a long time for her to open up and even start talking to her. Yet, even though she had just met Emily, she stood up for her against the bullying. 

That said a lot about her.

“Well,” you said, and both girls looked at you. “Now I’ll have to think of a punishment for both of you. Why do you two have to cause trouble on the very first day of school, hm?” 

The girls giggled a bit at your comment. You really tried to be stern, but with Gabi and Emily, it was hard. They were just too sweet…

“But, are you okay now?"

They both nodded at the same time, one more confidently than the other.

After spending a while talking to them, the three of you heard heavy footsteps. Firm, angry ones—like those of a giant.

“Papito…”

You turned and saw that tall, handsome man, but his face was clouded with anger. His eyes, burning red, seemed to glow with rage.

“That’s enough, Gabriella. We’re going home,” his voice was firm and cold, enough to send a chill down your spine.

“But, Dad—”

“Enough, Gabriella. Go to the car, now,” he said in the same authoritarian tone, leaving no room for argument.

The girl stood up, waved goodbye to Emily, and gave you one last glance before walking down the hallway.

However, Miguel didn’t follow her right away...

His fierce, burning gaze fell on you with such intensity it left you breathless.

“And you, teacher…”

Oh, no...

“What kind of school is this? Where are the adults when younger kids are being bullied by older ones? Why do you only react when someone fights back?”

His voice boomed through the room like thunder, as if the very air shrank with each word.

“Mr. O'Hara, this school has over five hundred students. We do everything we can, but sometimes it’s impossible to be everywhere at once,” you tried to explain as calmly as possible, even as you felt the lump forming in your throat.

But he didn’t seem willing to listen.

“Then maybe you should reconsider if this is your calling. The title of 'teacher' is too big for you, miss.”

His words weren’t shouted, but they hurt more than if they had been. They struck your chest like arrows, piercing a shield you hadn’t even realized you were wearing.

Why did they hurt so much, coming from someone who barely knew you?

You took a deep breath, swallowing the pain.

“I ask you, please, to choose your words carefully. You are in front of your daughter. What happened today was unfortunate, and no one is justifying Gabriella’s reaction. But we also can’t ignore what led her to that point.”

“And I'm asking you to do your job. That’s why you are being paid.” 

Miguel clenched his jaw, his eyes still burning with anger. For a moment it looked like he might say something else, but instead he gave you one last sharp look before turning and walking silently down the hallway, where Gabriella waited for him.

And when they disappeared, the air seemed to return to the room— but you were no longer the same.

“That man was really mean to you…”

Emily’s soft voice brought you back to the present. You looked down and saw her there, so small, so sincere. Her fingers nervously fidgeted with one of her braids, and her eyes watched you with concern.

You gave her a tired but genuine smile, and gently patted her head, feeling how that simple gesture soothed something inside you.

“It’s been a very long day, little one. Let’s go home, okay? You said you wanted to stop by for your colored pencils. Remember?”

At the mention of that, her face lit up with pure, contagious joy. Her eyes sparkled, and her smile was like sunshine after the storm.

“Then let’s go, let’s go! Hurry!" she said excitedly, clinging tightly to your hand.

The two of you left the school together, leaving behind the stares, the noise, the words that still stung.

And as you walked toward the street, hand in hand, you thought that even if you can’t always protect your students from the world’s injustices…

…for that little girl, you would do anything to keep her safe.

Her smile—sad, but sincere—was worth everything.

The beautiful smile of your little sister.

The ride home was completely silent. Gabriella stared out the window without saying a word, and Miguel kept both hands firmly on the steering wheel, his brow still furrowed.

He was still upset. With the school stuff. With the teachers. With the other parents. Leaving Mexico was supposed to be the first step toward a better, calmer life. A life where his daughter could be safe, grow up happy, without having to worry about things like this.

And now? Everything seemed to have fallen apart on the very first day.

“I'm truly sorry for what happened today," the principal had said in a calm voice, trying to ease the tension. “This afternoon, I reviewed Gabriella's records that we requested from her previous school. Good grades, excellent behavior, talent in sports—especially soccer—and an advanced English level.”

She flipped through a few pages inside a folder labeled in bold letters: O'HARA, G.

“We don’t believe she acted with bad intentions, as some parents have suggested,” the woman continued. “But, as we explained, pushing another student is not the right way to handle a situation, no matter how unfair it may seem.”

Miguel could only nod. His eyes lingered a moment longer on his daughter’s name written on the folder, and inside he felt a mixture of guilt, helplessness, and anger.

“We just need you to talk to her. She's a good girl—it's clear to see. We believe this might have happened out of nervousness or fear from being in a new place. We want to support her… and help her feel like part of our school.”

Once again, Miguel nodded. He had no words. There was a lump in his throat that not even his anger could dissolve. He felt frustrated with everyone... the principal, the judgmental parents, the teacher who hadn’t acted in time.

Even with himself.

“I will, ma'am. And believe me, I deeply regret that this happened. It hasn’t been easy for her… none of this process has been.”

The principal nodded silently, with an expression that, for the first time, seemed genuinely understanding.

Miguel glanced at his daughter through the rearview mirror. She was still staring blankly out the window. Just like that morning—quiet and withdrawn.

“Gabi?"

The girl looked at him briefly through the mirror.

“Mi niña, I'm so sorry your first day turned out like this. I promise it was just a small stumble. Tomorrow will be a new day, and everything’s going to be fine, I promise," he said with a smile, trying to convince Gabi that everything was okay.

Trying to convince himself that everything was okay...

“You were very harsh with Miss Hayes…”

Miguel sighed, keeping his focus on the road.

“Gabriella, those kids were bothering you, and she only reacted after you defended yourself.”

“Yeah... but I wanted to defend Emily. She looked really sad, papito..."

Miguel opened his mouth to reply, but no words came out. He stayed silent, touched by his daughter’s tenderness. That kind of pure empathy… something he wasn’t sure he’d ever fully learned.

“Sad?”

“Yeah... and she told me she doesn’t have a mom…”

What?

Had that little girl also lost her mother?

“Is she new? An orphan, or…?

Gabi shook her head.

“No. She’s been here since kindergarten… and she only told me a little about her bigger sister.” Gabi explained.

Miguel nodded, eyes still fixed on the road.

A brief silence settled between them.

“Papito?”

“Yes?”

“Do you think... Emily will want to sit with me tomorrow too?”

Miguel looked in the rearview mirror once more. His daughter didn’t look so dim anymore. There was a tiny light in her eyes—a little spark of hope.

“I’m sure she will, sweetheart. And this time, everything’s going to be just fine…”

And as the car drove down the tree-lined street, Miguel allowed himself to breathe a little easier.

Because despite everything… his little girl was still brave. And that, he thought, was a good start.

It was a bit late that night. After helping Emily wash up and brush her teeth, she went to her bedroom.

Of course, after all that high energy from finally getting her new box of colored pencils, she fell asleep almost immediately, tightly hugging her stuffed unicorn.

You turned on her salt lamp on the nightstand, and after looking at her lovingly, you gently closed the door.

You sighed, letting the exhaustion show on your face for just a few seconds, and checked the time on your phone.

10:19 PM.

You still had a few minutes left…

You went to the bathroom and started putting on your makeup in front of the mirror. Eyeliner that defined your gaze, subtle but effective eyeshadow, and a lipstick that made your lips look more alive, more confident… even though you knew none of it really protected you.

Then, you went to your room and began to strip for the day. You took off your sweater and pants, leaving the routine behind. With a small key that you kept on your bedside table, you opened the chest at the foot of your bed. Inside, a small universe of wigs, fabrics and outfits carefully selected to give life to other versions of yourself.

You chose a deep red outfit, the color of passion and determination. You paired it with a black bob wig, elegant and mysterious, that framed your face with a new identity. On your lips, you applied a deep, vibrant red, which contrasted with the softness of your skin.

The top was a semi-transparent bra, slightly exposing your breasts and nipples. The thong embraced your waist and ass, looking great on you. You looked in the mirror you had in a room and once you were convinced, you proceeded with the following.

You put on the black wig, combed it and finally, you were ready. You looked like a completely different person.

In front of the mirror, you observed yourself carefully.

It wasn’t a costume… It was part of the ritual. Part of what allowed you to make it to the end of the month.

You made sure your door was closed and locked.

Taking a deep breath, you turned on your computer.

The seconds it took to start felt eternal.

Your fingers moved automatically, typing the website’s address. Right before logging in, you paused. Another breath. And one more. It was your way of reminding yourself that you were in control… even if it didn’t always feel that way.

The mouse arrow clicked “Start live.” The camera turned on. You saw yourself on the screen: confident, ready, radiant. However, you always made sure that your face was not visible. They only saw your lips, your nose... half of your face completely unknown to the people on the other side of the screen.

The view count started rising slowly. Names piled up in the chat. Greetings, emojis, comments.

Then you smiled, letting go of the weight of the day. As if it were a layer of dust you could shake off for a few hours.

“Welcome to everyone who's joining. Very good evening, handsome ones…”

Your voice sounded sweet, confident, as if that other you—the teacher responsible for shaping young minds, the sister loved and admired by a little girl—didn’t exist at that moment.

It was just you. The one who reinvented herself each night to avoid falling apart.

And suddenly, you weren’t thinking about how hard the day had been.

You were thinking about Emily, asleep and safe… and about how tomorrow, you’d get up again—for her.

Tag list: @miss-tarja, @ryk-mt, @monarchberrysblog, @chubbyhedgehog (if you want to be tagged, you may comment <3)

Thank you very much for reading this far😭✨️

Any comments or feedback with respect will be welcome ❤️

[freakspectors]

PAPER SOLDIER.

A Fyodor Dostoyevsky | BSD x Female Reader x Dazai Osamu | BSD Smut Fanfic.

warnings ; smut, pussy slapping, fingering, threesomes, degradation, biting, praise if you squint, orgasm denial if you get a magnifying glass, not proof-read.

author's note ; hihi !! sorry for my absence, im getting ready for school next week, and my birthday was this weekend :) im working on a fic that was dedicated to myself rn, so have this tiny fic. enjoy! funfact: all my fic titles are songs that i like ;p !

“Look at her, clenching around nothing. Pathetic, is it not?”

Dazai and Fyodor laughed with each other, degrading you as if  you weren’t right in front of them. You knew not to speak unless spoken to, afraid of the punishment that would ensue if you had. After the two radiant men in front of you finished joking about your neediness, the Russian knelt down between your shaking legs.

“Do tell, Moya lyubov, how bad do you crave to have both of us inside of you?” he asked. Fyodor caressed your thighs, his breath fanning against your warm, sticky core. Instead of answering, you scoot yourself towards the demon's mouth, begging to have his tongue ravage you.

Disappointed, Fyodor pulls away from your legs and sits on his knees, giving you an insincere frown. You looked at the raven haired man confused, unsure of where Dazai went or why he was upset with you. Before you could even process he was now beside you, the brunette man’s hand smacked down on your cunt, making you jolt and yelp.

“We don’t want to do this, Bella. You’ve been such a good girl until now—” Dazai murmured. Using his middle and ring finger, he spreads you open, shooting a wicked smile at Fyodor; which he returns to him.

“—But you hadn’t answered my question. Disobeying orders results in a punishment; I thought you knew that well,” the rat keened. As if he read his mind, Dazai removed his fingers from your pussy and gave it another rough slap. Tears started to form; but all the two men did was chuckle.

“Wanna give it another go, hun?” the detective asked. He kissed your shoulder, resting his free hand on the other to massage you. “Maybe Fyodor’ll give you another chance..”

“Oh, but her teary, desperate eyes are gorgeous..”

“Indeed. But I’m sure she’s ready to redeem herself.”

“Are you sure you don’t just want to fuck her?”

“So what if I do? If you didn’t want to as well, you wouldn’t be here,” Dazai teased. Listening to them bicker over you only made you wetter, which hadn’t gone unnoticed.

With a hum, Dazai kissed your cheek and slid his fingers back through your slit. You moaned, arching your back at the sudden pleasure. He moved his digits up, rubbing tight circles on your sensitive clit. “C’mon, baby. Answer his question,” he whispered.

Through half-lidded eyes, you saw Fyodor back between your legs, kissing and biting the inside of your thighs. Just the sight of him and Dazai’s fingers could make you cum, but another punishment is the last thing you want. You open your mouth to speak; but a whine leaves your throat instead.

“You’re not fucked dumb already, are you?” the Russian questioned. “We’ve barely even started, kukla.”

“It’s just a few words, belladonna,” Dazai said. His fingers dove inside you, slowly pistoning them in and out of you, “say what he wants, and we’ll make you feel amazing.”

“Here, I’ll even ask you again:” Fyodor starts, “how bad do you crave to have both of us inside of you?”

“S-So bad.. I need both of you to fill me up..” you mumble. Fyodor tutted you and shook his head with another frown. Sighing with dissatisfaction, the brunette pulled his fingers out of you. The tears that were in your eyes finally fell, hot salty streaks going down your cheeks.

“I’m afraid you need to be louder, darling. Just a little more, I swear to you,” the rat said. Dazai shushed you and wiped your tears while Fyodor kissed and nibbled on your thighs like a mouse with cheese. He always got so close to your quivering pussy, yet pulled away each time he did. “Go on, love.”

“So bad, Fyodor.. I-I need the both of you to cum inside me s-so much I pass out..”

“See, was that so hard?” Dazai teased, a punchable smile plastered on his face. If you weren’t in your current situation, you’d glare at him.

“Khoroshaya rabota, moya dorogaya,” Fyodor praised. “Now, get on your hands and knees..”

“It’s time for your reward.” 

@ HELUVAKU 2023 . do not share or repost .

[olenvasynyt]

✨ Thank you for being in the fandom! ✨

Being here, you have contributed so much and have made so many people happy and excited. Now, just so we can get to know you better:

What made you first read the books, and which SJM series did you begin with first?

What character across all of her books do you relate to the most and why?

What inspired you to begin contributing to the fandom (i.e., fanfics, artwork, commissions, analysis, all of the above, or something else?)

Are there any accounts that you’d like to shoutout that have either inspired you, or made you feel the most welcomed and loved here?

💕 Thank you again for all that you do 💕

Awwwww thank you 💕

1. What made you first read the books, and which series did you begin with?

I found ACOTAR on tiktok in 2022. I remember that it was the same time the Barnes and Noble SF exclusive edition came out because I was buying one book at a time as I read and when I got to SF I was going to get the exclusive B&N edition but it was black and it didn’t match the rest of my copies haha. I read CC after I finished ACOTAR and officially joined the fanbase via a discord server around the same time.

2. What character across all of her books do you relate to the most and why?

I relate to both Nesta and Elain. Nesta has a lot of feelings of self-hatred which I relate to, and I think her mental health journey is very relatable and inspiring. I relate to Elain because she’s very much a people pleaser who keeps her thoughts to herself. I love both of them so much and I’m so excited for Elain’s journey because I just know she’ll be even more relatable.

3. What inspired you to begin to contribute to the fandom?

I have been writing for years but I always kept it to myself because idk, I kind of treated writing as an extreme version of daydreaming and I felt like daydreaming was embarrassing 😂😭 but I work so hard on ACOEAS for nearly three years and I was inspired by writing friends I met online both inside the fanbase and outside the fanbase, so I got the courage to finally post my stuff! I think accepting that you’re a nerd among nerds is so helpful: we’re all passionate and in love with these ships and characters, and when you talk to likeminded people, you just feel inspired. Both @zenkindoflove , @fierling , and two friends outside the fanbase were the first to read my writing and give me advice and encouragement, and that was so helpful.

And for art, I always was into art, I have been doing art classes for so many years. But art school really destroyed my mental health and creativity, so I dropped out and fell into a 6 year art slump where I couldn’t finish ANY of my projects. I felt so disheartened and sad, but I really think fanbases help with creativity and inspiration. I have so many headcanons and characters and ships I’m passionate about, so I felt compelled to get back into drawing and painting. Getting my drawing tablet for Christmas was an absolute game changer, and so many of my friends and mutuals are so encouraging and inspiring! @jadedbugart is so creative and has the same passion for Pinterest as I do and her pumping out so many gorgeous watercolor sketches was so motivating! And @bonecarversbestie ‘s organization, passion, and humor is so enjoyable and inspiring, @works-of-heart is incredibly talented, and I wish I could paint that gorgeous glowing lighting she always has in her art, and @fierling ‘s talent and expertise is such an amazing help!

4. Are there any accounts that you’d like to shoutout that have either inspired you, or made you feel the most welcomed and loved here?

I did a few shoutouts but I have so many more!!

@buffy-vanserra @jon-snows-man-bun @yaralulu @the-darkestminds @starsreminisce @yennas-stuff @sapphiresandgold @ethereal-lionheart @themadmorrigan @clarafae @thrumbolt @highlordofkrypton @clockwork-ashes @what-about-elvenis @separatist-apologist @goghwilde @crazy-ache @queercontrarian @speakingintothesilence @acourtofthought

[pbandjz]

𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 • 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐰𝐨

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: pdh!gene x fem!reader

𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐬: angst/comfort, fluff, romantic/suggestive tension.

𝐜𝐰: slightly suggestive (its GENE.) but majority sfw. 16+ !

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: 2nd year at phoenix drop high, youre a sophmore. You run into ivy causing a mess and getting on her SUPER bad side. keeping ivys bullying to yourself from your friends, you get into a situation with the shadow knights.

DISCLAIMER

ive never writen a fanfic before so if this is cringe or too many unnecessary details and horrible spelling mistakes i am so sorry...pls give me a chance..(pls give me feedback on how to improve my writing. pls be nice.)

CHAPTER 2.

As you park in front of the girl's house, you pull out your phone to send her a text.

_______________

Aphmau ^^

(xxx)-xxx-xxxx

You: alright !! :) I'll pick you up in the morning! Goodnight!!1

Aphmau: Okeyyy! :3 Goodnightt!

Read 10:23

-monday-

You: hey i'm hereee

Delivered 7:20

_______________

You stare at your phone as you wait for her to respond. Dead panning at the front entrance after 5 minutes. Looking back at your phone and sighing, you unbuckle yourself and open the door to your car. You walk up to the front door of Aphmau's house and knock on the door. To your surprise you can hear shuffling from the inside and a yell from what sounds like an older woman.

The older woman swings the door open and smiles brightly at you. You’ve met her before but briefly. “Hi mija! Are you here to take my baby to school?” She holds her hand together waiting for your response. “Yes ma’am! I'm here for Aphmau” you finally respond with a nervous smile. She whips around and walks towards the stairs before turning to you for a moment. “Come in mija!” she says while turning back to the stairs and yelling up the stairs. You close the door behind you and wait for the black haired girl at the entrance. You wait about two minutes before watching the short girl wave at you from up the stairs. You smile at her and wave back as she rushes down the stairs. “Sorry for the wait” she exclaims. She runs up to you and throws her bag onto the floor and gets on the floor to shove her feet into her shoes. Picking up her stuff, you look at her holding the door open for them to leave. She yells her goodbyes to her mom and shuts the door and locks it. She turns to you and smiles tiredly. You smile back and head towards your car. You get into the car together and start playing music.

_______

at school

You look down at your phone as you finish climbing the stairs up to the front entrance of the school. You both give each other a side eye remembering that they have the doors locked for the first day. You and Aphmau both agree after staring at the doors that you would find the others before the bell rings. Looking around you make eye contact with kawaii chans sparkling orange eyes. You giggle to yourself about how happy she is to see you and Aphmau. You guys make your way over to Kawaii chan who is standing with Kaitlyn and nicole.

You don't seem to notice someone out of the corner of your eye while checking your phone for the time causing you to crash into one another. You fall to your knees in slight pain, looking up covering your sore nose to see Aphmau's terrified face and then slowly looking to see who you had the unfortunate fate of bumping into on the first day. You lay your eyes on an edgy looking teenage boy. His ashy blue eyes slightly covered by messy black hair stare down at you with disdain. You look back at aphmau and she looks down back to you while reaching her hand out for you. Picking yourself up with the help of your friend you look back to where the black haired buy was a moment ago. He’s gone. You look around and see he’s only a few steps away so you watch him walk away into the corner join a few other edgy looking kids. You roll your eyes and look back at aphmau who is nervously smiling at you. “Who was that..?” you finally break the silence. She’s startled by your question. Although, now you were good friends, last year you weren't too close. So you don't have any knowledge of the boy and Aphmau's history. “...is he an ex?” You ask, making aphmau's jaw drop and deadpan to the group of friends that were waiting for you. You turn to look at them and to your surprise they looked shocked. Kaitlyn looks almost pissed and disgusted and Nicole's mouth is slightly open in awe. Kawaii chan on the other hand…you can tell something stirring up in her little meif'wa mind. She has the fattest smile on her face that makes you cringe and hide behind Aphmau as you collectively walked towards the group.

As you near them, passing the fountain, you can feel the stares of other students. They're not necessarily BAD stares but it was awkward. “Are you ok?” Kaitlyn asks, turning her head and staring menacingly at the boy that didn't seem too apologetic for knocking you down. You glance over to the group and the heat rushes to your face when you catch him staring and you. He smirks before looking away and continuing his conversation. “y-yeah..I’m fine,,why?”. You face the 4 friends in confusion. The four of them look at you with concern or nervous smiles. Nicole leans in and cups your ear and whispers, “Well, last year Aphmau had a few problems with that group. They’re called the Shadow Knights. They’re just a group of delinquents. They just skip and tag the place up while no one watches. They haven’t done anything too bad after what happened last year with them getting caught skipping in the back of the school. But they still seem to like picking on some students. It's best not to associate with them in any way for the better of your safety.” she pulls away and smiles. You look to aphmau with a worried face. “So his name is Gene?” You ask. “Yeah. The one you bumped into is gene, the white haired girl is sasha and the brunette is Zenix.” Kaitlyn says with a hint of hate in her voice.

As you turn to speak to Aphmau the bell rings and all the students rush into the building after the doors open. Youre about to walk into the crowd when KC grabs you and pulls you back into the group. “Kawaiichan thinks its best to be the last to get into the building so we dont get lost..” You shrug and nod in agreement. To your suprise, when most of the students made it into the building you see Gene and his friends start to sneak away. Kaitlyn being petty and nosy, calls over Teony. She’s been holding the door the entire time, you couldnt see her behind the swarm of students. Nonetheless she makes her way to you and the other girls before glancing at the group of delinquents trying to make their escape. “Sorry ladies..” she says sweetly before storming towards the students and scolding them and dragging them into the building. You start making your way into the building aswell. Catching another glimpse of an even more angered trio, you cant help but let out a small giggle while passing them, earning a glare from Zenix.

_____

☆

In class

You dont have any classes with any of your friends for your first class so you sit at the seat near the back window looking out into a hall. Your eyes travel across the room before stopping at the now opening classroom door. You watch the black haired boy grumbling to himself as Teony drags him into the class. She waves at you before explaining to the teacher that he had gotten lost. Obviously a lie. Teony was a saint when it came to saving even the bad kids. She leaves after waving you goodbye. TThe teacher looks at the boy with a soft smile. She looks around the room and lay her eyes into you. Smiling, she gestures over to you with her hand. “There. You will sit there for the semester. Maybe sitting next to a top student will help you get your act together." she says gently with a bit of disdain in her voice. He looks into the direction the teacher was pointing with zero emotion on his face. Until he lays eyes on you. He furrows his eyebrows and groans while shuffing his way towards the seat next to you. Placing the bag onto his desk before standing there next to his new seat glaring. You can smell the faint smell of cigarettes poorly covered by cologne, making your nose scrunch in disgust. You give him a weak and fake smile as he sits. Making him smile just as, if not more obviously fake, in response.

_____

☆

After a nerve-wracking class, you stop near the door of the class to look at your schedule. You can smell the cigarettes again. You felt someone shove past you in the alomst empty hall. You look up in confusion and see Gene walking away. You stare at the back of his head. “Asshole.” You mutter under your breath, just loud enough for him to hear over the sound of werewolves playing around in the next hall. He stop in his tracks, turns his head to look back at you with a shit eating grin. You return the smile back as if you said nothing. Walking past him before he can get a word in. You can feel his gaze burn into the back of your skull, making your face flush red in fear of what you just got yourself into.

[candycandy00]

The Doll House - A Gojo x Reader Fanfic Part 2

You sell yourself to the Doll House to pay your mom’s medical expenses, only to discover your trainer is the guy who bullied you relentlessly in high school: Gojo Satoru. 

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Read Geto’s Part Here!

Read Toji’s Part Here!

Read Nanami’s Part Here!

Read Sukuna’s Part Here!

Read Choso’s Part Here!

Note: Please remember that these stories don’t take place at the same time, or even one after the other! Consider each one its own timeline. So if you see Geto and Toji with other dolls, don’t be alarmed lol. I had to do it this way because if I don’t, by the time I get to the last trainer, there won’t be any other trainers left to interact with!

AU! Each trainer will get their own story! This is Gojo’s. If you’d like to be tagged in future parts, let me know! You must be an adult to be tagged! Any feedback whatsoever is adored!

Smut. 18+. Fem Reader. Chubby Reader. Dubcon. Pet Play. Bullying. Collars/Leashes. Fingering. Anal sex. Vaginal sex. Blindfolds. Bondage. Anal plugs. Humiliation. Oral sex. Gojo being an asshole.

The next morning, Gojo wakes up early, too eager to begin Chubby Bunny’s real training. Last night was just testing the waters. 

He keeps a stock of new items ready and available, in various sizes and themes, so he’s well prepared. By the time Chubby Bunny wakes up, he has his bed lined with cute outfits for her. 

She gets to her feet, stretches, and walks over to look at the clothes, the chain on her leash clinking. “What is all this?” she asks, picking up one of the pieces. 

“It’s your wardrobe,” he tells her. 

She doesn’t seem to like them. Her face scrunches up as if she just saw something disgusting. “These are all way too small. They won’t fit me.”

“Of course they will. I picked them specifically to highlight your best features!”

She glares at him, like he insulted her terribly. Why does she always react that way to compliments? 

“Try something on,” he says, walking over and unhooking the leash from her collar. “You can change in the bathroom if you don’t want to do it here.” 

She sifts through the items, holding several of them up and looking increasingly upset. “Why are there holes in the ass of all of these?”

Gojo laughs. “For your tail, silly!”

She looks confused, but eventually chooses an outfit and goes to the bathroom. He hears the lock click into place and thinks it’s cute that she’s so shy. When she emerges a little while later, she’s holding her pajamas in front of herself like a shield. 

“I was right, it’s too small,” she says, hovering near the bathroom door. 

“Come on over and let me see,” Gojo tells her. 

She doesn’t move. “It looks awful on me. Can I just wear something else?”

Gojo rolls his eyes. “Chubby Bunny, I saw you completely naked last night. I’ve already memorized every single inch of you. So stop being bashful and let me see.”

He meant the words to be reassuring, but she looks horrified. Regardless, she steps further into the room and slowly drops the pajamas. 

Gojo doesn’t think he’s ever gotten hard so fast in his life.  She’s wearing the outfit that covers the most, but it’s still super revealing. It resembles a pale pink one-piece swimsuit, with high cut areas for the thighs and tiny spaghetti straps at the top. Her lovely, pillowy tits are barely contained, threatening to pop out at any moment. The matching pink thigh high stockings, which she probably put on to cover a little more, only make her look more erotic. The way the thick flesh of her thighs sticks out a little over the top of the stockings drives him wild. 

She’s looking away from him, crossing one arm over her chest, not realizing that only squeezes her tits together and makes her look even sexier. 

He stops staring long enough to remember the outfit isn’t complete yet. Not without the finishing touches. He grabs the bunny ears and puts them on her head, and hooks the leash back onto her collar. Finally, the tail. 

When he brings it to her, he makes sure to open the sealed package in front of her. He wants her to know this is a new item, not something he used on a previous doll. It’s a fluffy, round white bunny tail, connected to a shiny silver butt plug. “Get on the bed, on all fours, and I’ll put your tail in.”

Her eyes flick between the tail and his face, frantic, like a frightened little rabbit. She really is the cutest! 

“You can’t be serious,” she says. 

“This is part of the training. I said I wouldn’t give you special treatment, remember? All my pets have to have a tail.”

“How long do I have to wear that thing?”

“Until I take it out,” he says. 

She’s still looking at the tail as if it’s some dangerous weapon he’s going to use to attack her. 

“Look, it’s way smaller than my dick, so it shouldn’t hurt at all.”

She looks down, lowering her voice as she says, “But I’m still sore from last night.”

Somehow, hearing her say that in that shy little voice turns him on even more. He pulls the leash, forcing her to come closer to him, and gently rubs her head. “It’s okay, Bunny. I’ll lube you up really good. Once you get used to it, I promise you’ll like it.”

She finally nods and climbs onto the bed, her ass pointing at him. Fuck, she’s hot. He has to resist the urge to fuck her again right there. He controls himself, and opens the lube, dripping it into the hole in her outfit, right over her asshole. He massages it in, enjoying the way she quivers and jerks away. He slides his other hand down and finds her clit, giving it a few quick strokes with his fingers. She makes the cutest little squeak he’s ever heard, her whole body jolting. He’s never seen a woman with such a sensitive pussy before, and he loves it. 

She looks back at him over her shoulder. “A-are you done yet?”

“Nope,” he says, holding the tail up to his face, running his tongue over the plug. She watches as he coats it thoroughly with his saliva, her face looking more and more embarrassed. “Now, relax your body. I’m putting it in.”

She turns away, facing forward again. Her hands are gripping the sheets tightly. He wishes she would just relax. But he can’t wait forever, so he spreads her cheeks with his fingers and lines the tail up with her hole. It slides in easily, and she only makes a few quiet whimpers. The hole in the outfit has a cute bow attached at the back, which fastens around the tail, keeping it securely in. 

“It’s in,” he says, stepping back. 

For a few seconds, she doesn’t move an inch, then she gradually moves off the bed and stands beside it. She keeps trying to turn and look at her ass. “It feels weird,” she tells him. 

“You’ll get used to it,” he responds. “Turn around and wiggle your tail for me.”

She gives him another one of those looks, the kind she used to give him in high school when he swiped her notebook from her desk and made her beg him to give it back. It riles him up even now. 

Still looking half angry, half mortified, she turns to face away from him and gives the tiniest shake of her ass. 

“Oh come on, you can do better than that! Wiggle!” He gives the leash a little tug, just to urge her on. 

She glances back at him again, then sighs and bends over slightly, showing off her round ass. Then she wiggles it properly, the bunny tail wagging in the air, her thick thighs and ass jiggling in the cutest way. 

Fuck, he can’t hold back. She’s way too fucking adorable. 

He jerks the leash, pulling her to him, right up against his body. Ah, she’s so soft! But his cock is so hard it feels like it’s about to explode. 

“Get on your knees,” he says, almost breathless, “and open your mouth.”

She looks at him with wide eyes, a blush creeping over her features. But she’s an obedient pet, so she carefully lowers herself to her knees, making sure not to disrupt the tail. By the time he has his dick out, she’s waiting with her mouth open, just like he wanted. 

She’s perfect. 

There’s no hesitation when she wraps her plump lips around his cock, her wet tongue gliding over his tip. She has one hand at the base of his shaft, stroking to the same rhythm as her lips, and the other hand gently squeezing his balls. 

Gojo can’t help but groan. “Holy fuck, how does a virgin learn to suck cock like this?”

She pulls back and looks up at him, strings of saliva connecting her mouth to his tip. “I’ve done this before,” she says, then goes back to sucking him off, taking him so deep he hits the back of her throat. 

He can’t take his eyes off her, watching her head bob back and forth, hearing the wet sounds she’s making. The girl he’s wanted for so many years, the girl he’s been crazy over, is on her knees in front of him, deep throating his cock. It’s the best feeling in the whole world. 

It’s occurred to Gojo that she’s not aware of his feelings for her, now or even back in high school. He’ll tell her at some point. Right now, he’s kind of turned on by the idea of her thinking it’s a one-sided thing, of her pining away for him. It makes teasing her so much more fun. 

“You must be loving this,” he says, grinning when her eyes shift up to his face. “The guy you thought you had no shot with has his cock in your mouth.”

She lowers her eyes, but doesn’t stop. He liked it better when she looked up at him, but her tongue on the underside of his dick feels so amazing, he can barely think straight. 

He holds out as long as he can, wanting to stretch this out for as long as possible. She just looks so hot like this, submissively pleasing him, the bunny tail sticking out behind her, those huge tits bouncing as she moves her head back and forth. But her mouth feels way too good. 

“Ah, fuck, I’m gonna cum in your mouth!”

He doesn’t feel her try to pull away, but just in case, he grips the leash and holds her in place while he fills her mouth. 

*********************

You don’t struggle as Gojo’s warm, sticky cum shoots down your throat. This is the one sexual act you have experience with, so at least it doesn’t shock you. 

Glancing up at him, you hate just how physically perfect he is. Why does this asshole have to be so beautiful? He smells wonderful, his scent almost intoxicating. Even his cum is delicious. 

He uses the leash to pull you upwards, to your feet, then he rubs the top of your head, between the white fluffy ears, and says, “Good bunny!”

This is degrading. You feel like crying, and you feel deeply ashamed that you actually enjoyed sucking his cock. It even made you wet. What is wrong with you? Maybe some weak, pathetic part of you really does feel lucky that such a beautiful man is even wiling to touch you. 

After the two of you clean up, Gojo says, “Let’s go get breakfast.”

“Okay. I’ll get dressed,” you reply. 

He gives you a strange look. “You’re already dressed.”

You look at him with horror. “You want me to wear this?! Where other people can see?!”

“Why do you think I had you put it on?” he asks. 

“But… the tail…”

“What about it?”

You squirm uncomfortably. “It’s hard to walk with this thing in.”

He grins. “Pets don’t walk around on two legs, silly Bunny.” Then he jangles the leash. 

“Please don’t tell me I have to hop,” you say, exasperated. 

“No, not hop. I tried that once with another bunny and she pulled a muscle. Poor thing. But you do have to crawl,” he says. Then he smiles brightly. “Suguru and Nanami will be so surprised to see you!”

“Oh God, I forgot about them! I can’t wear this out there! I look gross!” Your voice is getting more panicked. This is hell. The three hottest guys you went to school with are going to be seeing you in this skin tight outfit! You cross your arms over your chest and stomach, feeling hideous. 

Gojo tilts his head as he looks you up and down. “Gross? But you look so squeezable! They’re gonna be jealous!”

There he goes, being sarcastic again. He must think this is funny. “It’s too embarrassing,” you say. 

“Oh don’t worry about that!” Gojo says with a laugh. “Suguru makes his doll walk around stark naked! She doesn’t even wear socks. Now that’s embarrassing!”

“That sounds awful,” you say, reconsidering your earlier assumption that Geto would have been better. 

“We have this little game we play when he gets a new doll. I pretend to harass her and try to touch her so he can swoop in and be all, ‘Don’t touch my doll!’ and make her think he’s protective.”

“Wow, I didn’t realize he’s such a manipulative person,” you tell him. The Geto you remember was a fairly nice, chill guy. Maybe he just seemed that way compared to Gojo. Not that you knew him all that well. 

“Nanami lets his dolls wear whatever, but he makes them call him Daddy and he spanks them with his belt when they misbehave.”

You shudder. “Ugh, cringe.”

“I know, right?” Gojo laughs. 

You snicker too, and then catch yourself. Why are you standing here talking to him like he really is an old friend? 

If he notices the shift in your mood, he doesn’t let on. He’s still grinning like an idiot as he opens the door. “Okay, get on your hands and knees like a good pet.”

You sigh dejectedly and get down on the floor. This is going to be humiliating, but at least everyone here is used to Gojo and his bullshit, so they won’t be surprised. And at least you’re not totally naked. 

He leads you down the hall, walking slowly to give you time to keep up with him as he holds your leash. Luckily the hallway is carpeted, so it’s relatively soft under your knees, but the tail still feels strange in your ass. You dread reaching the dining room, being seen by strangers and old classmates alike. But you don’t have a choice, so you might as well get it over with. 

In the dining room, Gojo leads you past a few tables, past a few strangers who don’t even glance at you. He stops at a table where Geto is sitting with his completely nude doll. Her face is bright red. 

“Look who’s here,” Gojo says, pulling up the leash so that you have to raise up slightly. “It’s Chubby Bunny! You remember her, right Suguru?”

Geto looks surprised. “Yes, I remember her,” he says, his gaze shifting from you to Gojo. 

You hear Gojo calling Nanami over, and soon the blonde man is standing in front of you, looking extremely uncomfortable. 

“She’s my new doll,” Gojo announces cheerfully. “Isn’t that funny?”

Nanami gives you a pitying glance. “I see. How unfortunate for you,” he says to you before walking away. 

Geto and Gojo are speaking quietly to each other, and you hear Geto say, “This is a bad idea. You can’t control yourself when it comes to her and you know it.”

“It’s fine,” Gojo tells him. “I’m being professional.”

You shudder. What sort of bullying does Geto think his friend will put you through? 

Gojo eventually leads you to a table and then gets food for both of you. He puts some food, steamed vegetables, in the palm of his hand and holds it out to you. “Here, eat.”

You think this is weird, but you reach out your hand to take a piece. 

Gojo pulls his hand back. “No no, eat out of my hand.”

You grimace, but realize he’s not going to let this go. So you lean forward and use your tongue to scoop some food into your mouth. Gojo watches you with a pleased expression. “Don’t worry, when we’re alone in my room, you can eat whatever you want. We’ll just do it this way in the dining hall.”

So this is just about embarrassing you and making you feel low. You’re not surprised. You spend the rest of the meal eating out of Gojo’s hand, wondering when he’s going to eat anything himself. When it’s over, he leads you back to his room and hooks your leash to his nightstand again. 

“I’m gonna go grab us some real food,” he says. “I’ll be right back.”

With no other option, not even able to sit down with the tail in, you stand there in his room while he leaves. 

************************

In the kitchen, Gojo is grabbing a double armload of snacks when Geto confronts him. 

“Are you out of your mind?” Geto demands, his hand on the counter. “You’re not supposed to get attached to dolls you train, and here you are training the girl you were in love with in high school!”

Gojo is clutching the snacks. “Suguru, I’m keeping her.”

“You’re joking.”

“I’m not. She’s everything I dreamed she would be. She’s so soft and cute and you wouldn’t believe the blowjob she gave me this morning! Her tongue is like magic!”

Geto frowns. “I’d rather not hear that kind of stuff about two of my former classmates. Anyway, keep in mind that she has the right to refuse. It’s in her contract.”

“She won’t,” Gojo says quickly. “Why would she? She admitted she liked me in high school.”

“In high school, not now. And even then it was probably only before you started bullying her.”

Gojo scoffs. “That wasn’t so bad. I just teased her.”

Geto narrows his eyes. “Satoru, you tripped her in the hallway and made her fall in front of everyone. Among many other things.”

“I tripped you and Haibara all the time! I was just joking around!”

“It’s different with girls,” Geto says. “Remember when you tripped Shoko?”

Gojo looks down with a pouty expression. “She smashed my sunglasses.”

“Yeah, and she was your friend.”

Gojo looks back up. “That all happened so long ago. I’m sure Chubby Bunny is over it by now.”

“Just try to think things through,” Geto tells him. “From her perspective, she’s now the sex slave of her former bully. This is probably a nightmare for her.”

Gojo smirks. “It didn’t seem so nightmarish when she was moaning and cumming last night.”

Geto turns around. “Alright, I’m done. Just think about what I said.”

Several days later, Gojo still hasn’t popped Chubby Bunny’s cherry. He knows she wants him to. In the heat of some of their intimate moments, she’s asked him to. He wants to literally more than anything, but he wants her to beg for it. The very thought of it makes his dick throb. 

Presently, he has her spread out on his bed like a buffet. She’s wearing nothing but the collar, bunny ears, and a pair of thigh high stockings, the rest of her on display for him. She’s lying on her back, her hands tied behind her. She’s blindfolded, and her legs are spread far apart, bent up at the knees, her body partially folded. 

She’s twitching as he pumps a large pink dildo in and out of her ass. He loves having her in this position, her tits jutting out and bouncing as she jerks, her pussy totally exposed and defenseless. With his free hand he runs his thumb up her slit, loving the way it glistens with her arousal. When he parts the flesh and strokes her quivering clit, her body nearly jumps off the bed. She’s so so so sensitive! Playing with her body is the most fun Gojo has ever had. 

Being blindfolded, all her other senses must be heightened. She’s breathing hard as his thumb continuously rubs her delicate little nub, her mouth making the sweetest cries he’s ever heard. 

“Does my cute bunny want me to fuck her tight little cunt?” he asks, still plunging the dildo into her other hole. 

She nods, her body shaking like a leaf. 

“Want my huge cock stuffed into this virgin pussy?” 

“Y-yes!”

He keeps rubbing her clit, watching her come undone, the pleasure overtaking her. She’s at her cutest like this, so overwhelmed by stimulation that she starts crying. He can see tears leaking out beneath the blindfold. 

“You’re gonna have to ask for it, Chubby Bunny,” he says, lowering his voice. 

She squirms under his touch. “Please,” she whispers. 

“Please… what?”

She lets out a sob. “Please… fuck me!”

He grins. “I’m already fucking you. Be more specific.”

“Please… fuck my pussy with your cock!”

He stares down at her trembling form, thinking it’s the most beautiful sight on earth. The woman he’s craved all this time is crying in his bed, begging for his cock. He has to be inside her, soon, or he just might cum in his pants. 

*************************

You’re a complete mess. Gojo has reduced you to this. You’re lying here, shaking, tied up, totally helpless, your body being pleasured relentlessly while your heart is tormented. You don’t even know who you are anymore. The most pitiful, disgusting side of yourself has emerged, desperate for this man to fuck you. 

You feel him pulling off your blindfold, and your breath hitches. You wish he’d left it on. You don’t want to look into those haunting eyes anymore. But the blindfold is gone, and you open your eyes to find his face inches from yours, looking like a heavenly being. 

He’s not smirking or grinning right now. He’s staring at you, his perfect lips slightly parted, his hair messy, his cheeks slightly pink. He looks into your teary eyes and then kisses you on the lips, gently. Then he slides down, pulls the dildo out, and tosses it aside. He leans his face down, holding your slick folds open with his fingers, and begins licking your clit. 

You jerk, arching your back, screaming in ecstasy. His tongue glides all over it, his saliva mixing with your arousal, making you absolutely drenched. And when you’re right on the edge of cumming, he stops and pulls back. You look at him with pleading eyes, and he gives you a kind, warm smile. It’s not the smug grin he usually wears. 

“I had to make sure you’re nice and slippery,” he says. “I don’t want to hurt my Bunny.”

You know what that means. He’s finally going to fuck you for real! He scoots back onto his knees and opens his pants, hurrying to pull out his massive cock. Then he moves closer to you, pulling your legs onto his shoulders and bending you even more. 

You gasp as you feel his cock begin to enter you. At first it’s going in easily, but at some point it starts to hurt. It’s not unbearable pain, but an ache that spreads from your pussy and up to your lower abdomen. And he’s still going deeper, as if he wants to fuck directly into your heart. 

You squirm beneath him, and he puts a hand on your face, making you look at him, at those damned eyes. “Feel it? Feel me inside you?”

“Yes,” you squeak out. “It… it hurts… it’s too big.”

You feel him push even deeper in, and then he groans. “Fuck… I’m all the way in… so fucking tight…” Then he locks eyes with you again. “Now that I’m in, what do you want me to do?”

“Ah… f-fuck me…”

“Are you sure?” he asks, his voice so lovely in your ear. “If I start fucking you now, I might wreck this poor little pussy.”

Your mind feels cloudy. You don’t care anymore. You don’t care if he hurts you. All you want, right now, is to be fucked by him. “Wreck me,” you say between ragged breaths. “Ruin me!”

You hear him inhale sharply, and his eyes seem to shimmer as he looks down at you. “I’ll ruin you,” he says huskily. And in a voice so low you can barely hear him, he adds, “Because you’re mine.”

He fucks you then, plunging in and out of you, stretching you to the limit, holding your face still with his hand to make you maintain eye contact while his other hand squeezes whatever flesh it can find. Your brain can barely process whether it hurts or feels amazing. His hard body is pressed against you, his skin creating friction against your sensitive clit as he pounds into you, flooding your senses. 

You hear his voice, saying something incomprehensible. It sounds like, “You’re mine, you’re mine, you’re mine”. He kisses you again, devouring your mouth, and pulls back in time to watch your face as you cum, staring into your eyes. When he cums minutes later, he does so deeply inside you. 

He pulls out slowly. His pretty pale cock is coated in a thin layer of sticky red blood, mixed with your cum and his. He pants for a minute, still staring at you, like he can’t take his eyes off you. 

Still in his bed instead of the pet bed, you fall asleep before even cleaning up. 

Over the next few days, Gojo fucks you constantly, in one hole or another. Your body is growing to crave his touch, crave the pleasure he gives you. But your heart is in turmoil. 

One day, as you’re stepping out of the bathroom in your pajamas before bed, you start to feel dizzy, lightheaded. You’ve had spells of anemia for years now, and you groan as you grip Gojo’s dresser. You don’t want to faint here, in front of him. You hate showing him even more of your weaknesses. But the room is going dark, and you feel like you’re falling. 

You hear Gojo’s voice. It sounds distant. 

“Chubby Bunny? Are you okay? What’s wrong? Hey!”

You think you feel two strong arms wrap around you as the room goes completely black. 

Tag List:

@suguguro @kaedear @onyxsphynx @poopoobuttsy @butterskyy @collectionofdolls @akaotv @witchbybirth @bloofinntoona @wasurenagusaa @tclbts @tojirin @lucyrocks86 @badbyeyoongi @97britt @aydene @lzaj19 @lyn-lotte @missthatgirl @peachedtv @ladytamayolover @nanam1nx @deegausserr @voids-universe @hinata7346 @maflorex @issracollen @xkittiecatx @ryumurin @emrys3456 @mysecretesc8pe @typicalloser3

[quinnyundertow]

I may just delete this in a few hours but fuck I feel like I need a break from JJK. At least until the manga is totally finished. With Gege and his preference for twists over plot I never know where I stand. He’s brought characters back just to kill them again multiple times and honestly as stupid as it sounds this shit stresses me out. I need a final verdict on Choso, Yuta and Gojo. I have a feeling Choso and Gojo are gone for good but he never mentioned Nobara for years and she popped back up after she had a gaping hole in her head.

Everytime he brings up Gojo or Choso I get sad all over again. I want closure, I want to mourn and then I want to write fanfics where it’s not depressing anymore.

Also, something unrelated that’s really bothering me. If you don’t have anything nice to say when commenting on a fic, just don’t? I feel like indieotterxoxo was one of the best fic writers out there and she deleted everything from rude comments. I know I’ve had a massive writers block and insecurity about writing after I got some comments saying they found my recent chapters disappointing and a let down. It really hurts spending hours writing only to read stuff about how the plot is starting to suck or you don’t like the authors choices. We just write for fun when we aren’t working or going to school and dealing with real life bs. I’m not having fun anymore. I’m just stressed I’ll disappoint people.

[hopeswriting]

Top KHR fanfics

hi nonny, thank you for the ask!

okay so i obviously haven't read all the khr fics out there, so this will be by no means an exhaustive list. but from the ones i've read? *crack knuckles* let's go through my bookmarks in no particular order!

also adding this after i finished answering the ask, but this just ended up being a list of arco fics and/or tsuna fics (+ the 10th gen and/or reborn). but like. are we surprised zfsdfdsf.

on ao3:

flip a coin [head for villain, tail for hero] by petroltogo

Superhero/Supervillain AU: All Sawada Tsunayoshi wants to do is help people. Considering his occupation as a Vongola Inc. superhero, you'd think that wouldn't be much of a problem. You'd be wrong. [Of course 'people' isn't supposed to include wanted supervillains. But it's hardly Tsuna's fault that the training manual doesn't specify that, is it.] Along the way, he learns to help himself.

this series is just so, so good! all the works in it are simply *chef's kiss*. the worldbuilding is amazing, the characters so in character and complex and with so many layers and depth to them. also it's obviously planned down to the last detail, so it's incredibly fun to follow along and try to piece the puzzle along with the various characters' pov.

The Boy in the Ice by eloquentelegance

A mysterious pillar of ice drops out of the sky and fuses with the grounds of Yuuei. It's not the strangest thing to happen, especially for this school. But the boy, frozen within, is strange - yes, very strange indeed.

haven't read chapter 2 yet, but i have no doubt it won't disappoint whenever i'll be able to get to it. as for chapter 1? a fucking masterpiece. it's a khr x bnha crossover, and i don't usually read crossover, but boy, am i glad this is one of the few i gave a chance to haha.

Yugen by Little_Miss_Bunny

In one world, Tsuna sacrificed his life to save the Arcobaleno. As soon as he drew his last breath, he opened his eyes again to see beaten students cowering in front of him and a bloody hammer in his hand.

it's been a while since i've reread this one, but i still have the reaction of "oh, this one was so, so good!!" whenever i come across it lol, so yeah. what i do remember is i absolutely love the depiction of hibari in this one as well as his dynamic with tsuna. also little miss bunny is one of my favorite khr writers, they're so good at crafting the different aus they come up with and making them feel real while still keeping the characters in character, i love it.

Target Acquired: Wicked Jester by poorasdirt

Colonnello has always been a military man. He understood what led to him being cursed. He understood why the others had been cursed. Or, well, why most of the others had been cursed. Skull's motivations had always been a mystery to him. Now that the curse had been lifted, Colonnello could finally sit back and try to puzzle it out. If only it were that easy. Or Colonnello's instincts were telling him something wasn't right and curiosity only kills cats.

i know for a fact i've already recc this one before, and i'm doing it again because it's just that good. <3 it's another one heavy on worldbuilding, which is funny because usually worldbuilding isn't exactly my thing, but how can i say no to them when they're all so well written like this. anyway it's a skull-centric fic through nello's pov, so of course i was all for it zfsegfdsds.

Starstruck by Little_Miss_Bunny

All Tsuna wanted was his siblings to be happy. So, he didn't see a problem attending a fan signing for one of the hottest bands to date, even if he had no clue who they were. He did start seeing a problem when more idols started appearing in his life. It got even worse when they just wouldn't leave him alone.

i love this one so, soo much! this is my favorite work of theirs. it's currently at 153k words tho, so not too sure how to summarize it lol, but just trust me on this one! it's more on the lighthearted one compared to their other works, tho still touch on serious stuff and do it well, but i'd still consider it a comfort (and funny) fic.

Scorching Ember by Little_Miss_Bunny

When the revered Sky Priestess suddenly passes away, everyone mourns. However, the world is soon engulfed by darkness, giving rise to creatures that seemed to only exist in folktales. With the gods mysteriously absent, there is no one to keep everything from descending into ruins—until a hunter finds a curious object in a barren creek.

another one from little miss bunny that i love so much!! maybe or maybe not because nello is the first arco to appear, so there's certainly no shortage of nello & tsuna interactions. more seriously tho zrfsdfds, this is another one where the worldbuilding has obviously been given a lot of care, and the characters are written so well, tsuna first of all, and it's just super fun to read.

Forever Family, Forever Vongola by AnimationNut

They're a group of insane, energetic, destructive and hyper people. But they also love each other, whether some are willing to admit it or not. Family sticks together, through thick, thin, and crazy.

the ultimate platonic/familial khr fic! with how many chapters it already has (57 for 195k words), you're bound to find more than one you'll love. some are connected, most are not. some are lighthearted fluff, some more on the heavy, serious side of things. but all chapters are written so well, and at their cores it's all about how much these guys love each other.

The Hottest of Flames can Melt the Strongest of Chains by Luki (KelpieCodyne)

I'm not a liar, but I close my eyes a lot by Seito

another incredible series that is just so, soo good! it's about tsuna not wanting to become vongola decimo and doing what he can so it won't happen. no happy endings yet, but the series isn't marked complete yet either, so we'll see.

It started with bang. A bullet casing falling to the ground; the clatter echoing off the walls. It started with Tsuna putting a bullet through the head of his enemy, unflinchingly. Blood spattered, flying, rolling down Tsuna's cheek. Brown eyes burn with orange fire, yet so, so, so cold. In another world, Reborn would have smiled. In this world, Reborn flinched.

i haven't reread this one in a long while, so i honestly... don't quite remember how it goes zqdsfds, but i still remember it was an amazing read all the same!! i mean, the summary alone is so good? also this writer is one of the best in the fandom imo, so yeah.

ozymandias was a punkass bitch (but he had the right idea) by Seito

“You want Vongola? You can have it,” Tsuna says serenely.

loved this one too! badass tsuna is always a treat, and i always love to see it.

last to fade by Trilies

Mammon's last breath is of rain and gunpowder. Before they make their choice, they consider lives lost and the options they have. There's not a lot. Set during the Millefiore timeline.

a look at what mammon's last moment could have been like. super well-written.

Striking Once by istilllikekhr

A peek into the universe where Nana Sawada was given the Lightning Mare Ring.

this one has an unsual pairing (byakuran & nana), but you'll be missing out if you don't give it a chance because of it. i also didn't have a clue what to expect when i first clicked on it, but when i tell you it did not disappoint. and the ending? oughhh. please give this a chance!

Sunny Skies Ahead by Ourliazo

Reborn is not yet the world's greatest hitman, not quite a proper Sky, and definitely doesn't want these ridiculous Guardians that he keeps running into.

sky arco reborn who does not want to be the sky arco? it's just as chaotic and funny as you might think zqefdddsf. the interactions in this are absolute gold, and it's just such a fun ride to see all the bonding happen despite reborn's best efforts lmao. also ourliazo is another one of my favorite khr writers. the way they write the arco and tsuna (and every other khr characters tbh)? absolute peak. and then you add their humor, and i will simply never be tired of their writing.

Sincerely, Scattered Shards by You_Light_The_Sky

Tsuna’s the foolish type to give a bit of his heart to anyone he meets. No one ever wanted his ugly heart shards until he met his Guardians. No one ever treasured his heart shards until them either. Hints of All27 and R27.

heartbreaking and heartwarming all at once. i actually had forgotten i had this one in my bookmarks, as well as the fic as a whole tbh 😅, but it all instantly came back to me like a punch in the gut. there's so much love in this one guys. the kind that hurts and the kind that heals and the kind that makes it all worth it in the end.

Forgotten Memories of a Broken Soldier by Maintenant

The Arcobaleno arrive at their collective house after their yearly meeting turned mission. Skull had been left there to cook them a warm meal for their return, seeing as he is useless in a mission, but it is not Skull they find when they return. Rather, it is, but it is not. For this Skull has cold eyes and harsher threats, and he doesn't know the rest of the Arcobaleno. Perhaps more importantly, the Arcobaleno find, is that they don't know Skull.

i love this one for the ending and the build up to it. it's a wip, but the first chapter can be read as a one shot (imo) so it works well. it's a skull is harry potter fic, and like i already said i don't usually read crossover fics, but this is another one i'm glad i gave a chance to.

Never Will Forget by Squoxie

Tell the ones, the ones I loved I never will forget

a song fic about skull surviving the rest of the arco. the summary alone always pulls at my heartstrings whenever i read it.

Beginnings And Middles But No Ends In Sight by Ourliazo

A compilation of the various chaotic missions that the Arcobaleno take on pre-curse - as well as the many dumb things they throw themselves into even without being paid for it. [Fon tries to trap a cockroach with a tissue, but it runs up his sleeve. Reborn watches as Fon flips his shit, rips off his sleeve, and punches the cockroach to death. Reborn is still laughing by the time Fon comes back from disposing of the corpse and washing his hands. "Thank you," Fon says pointedly, rather upset by the entire experience. Reborn is crying.]

this is the daily life arc - arco version fic as i like to call it. an absolute fucking ride as you can imagine. love it to fucking bits.

don't look at the child underneath the floorboards by Kosaji

Happiness is based on a just discrimination of what is necessary, what is neither necessary nor destructive, and what is destructive. - The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas Ursula K. Le Guin In which truths are realized and a choice is made.

the one where tsuna is freed from vongola thanks to his guardians. love it a lot.

Those Last Few Memories by Ourliazo

In one future, the Arcobaleno band together and try to fight off the Anti Tri-ni-set radiation.

the way my heart squeezes whenever i think of this fic. so heartbreaking and so well written. and the ending? oughhh. you just have to read this one!

on ff.net:

Rage Vs Hope By: ariathal2410

The order was to kill anything that moved, the city was too far gone to hope for survivors. But if there was one thing Colonnello didn't sign up for, it was killing kids. (28 Weeks Later AU, eventually merges into a semi-au) eventual all27?

zombies au that is both nello and tsuna centric! alternate between both their povs too. there's other canonical characters as well as ocs, but they're written well and enjoyable to read about too.

How to Survive the Fae By: MikeLamp

As the trees around them collapse, Tsuna's eyes don't stray from the human trembling before him, "So tell me," he hisses, eyes glowing, "where is your King now?" She whimpers instead of answering. In a world where the fae haunt the overgrown forests and angels control the cities with an iron fist, Tsuna doesn't want to just survive anymore.

another fantasy au that still manages to keep the characters true to themselves and is super well written. it's arco27 (seems to be anyway), with skull and who is likely fon in the last chapter being the only arco who appeared so far. and the skull & tsuna interactions in this? *chef's kiss* i love them.

Just Another Tuesday By: ariathal2410

Tsuna doesn't know why all this supernatural shit started happening in his life, but he'd really like it to stop now please. Mild Arco27

this is one of my favorite khr comfort fics. funny and fluffy with just the right amount of protectiveness and possessiveness from the arco (as well as flirtiness tbh lol).

come get me By: MakeItVoid

Reborn waits a little impatiently for someone to come get him. He doesn't know what to do now. The fire is creeping closer. (Reborn doesn't want to die like this.)

this is imo one of the best written reborn i've ever read about. maybe even the best one? either way i just love so, so much the way he's written in this fic, i couldn't not have added it to this list.

Gokudera Hayato By: rynoa29

It hurts more than you think it would, but your face can't help but to beam with pride.

a look at gokudera and his dynamic with the key people around him throughout his life. a lovely and well written exploration of his character.

and that was the last fic of the list! by which i mean there's actually more haha, but these are the cream of the crop among my favorite khr fics.

[knightyoomyoui]

KNIGHT'S ALL-TIME FAVORITE TWICE FANFIC STORIES OF GREATNESS: PART 1

Heyo, Knight here! I mentioned from my previous post days ago that I decided to share some of my favorite TWICE fics that I finished reading since I reactivated my Wattpad account back in 2020. I just feel like my fellow TWICE AU authors who made these deserves much appreciation and recognition, so I made this. If you haven’t checked them out, oh you better do so. There will be more for me to share, so for now, take a look at these five stories that will be included here.

1.) "Adore You" | Mina x Nayeon by Nabongsbunny (Fluff, Smut, Angst) (2020)

I remember when this was my very first TWICE AU that I'd read after months of getting introduced to TWICE back in 2020. A friend of mine requested that I read this one after I asked her about fanfiction that features K-Pop idols, which I learned that other people were also doing it too. And my God, when I gave it a try... Although I was shocked at first at the unexpected lesbian smut that greeted me (and through the rest of the story, which my friend shyly apologizes to me for not making me aware of, lol, but I didn't mind it that much since I'm just in for the story), but all I can say is that the narration is so beautifully written, and all of the characters, especially Nayeon and Mina's, chemistry was carefully built through their backstories, moments, and decisions in life that actually can be put into real-life situations in which, despite being disappointing, you can't help but not blame them for it because... well, it's love. Also, this story was the reason that got me into listening and loving the song "Adore You" by Harry Styles. This one serves as like the official soundtrack if this would be an entire film, but you won't be surprised why the author perfectly chose this song to fit for Minayeon's story. A little glimpse to give about the story, if I remember correctly (it has been more than a year since I read it, but I'm planning to give it a reread because of how perfect it is), Nayeon is the bratty CEO of her company when she met Mina as the team leader who was appointed by her parents to take care of her as they send her to LA to enter a boarding school. There, she realized that this isn't actually their first time meeting each other when Nayeon finds Mina familiar, which brought her to recall where it all began, and the rest is one hell of a rollercoaster ride of emotions. Give it a read for yourself if you are fine with reading TWICE AU that features a ship or pair and doesn't mind a girl-to-girl relationship. I'm probably sure it would end up as one of the best TWICE AU stories you'll ever read. No wonder it became an iconic fanfic in the community. Try to ask a Minayeon fanfic to others; I bet this would be the first or one of them to be mentioned.

2.) "Move On" | Nayeon x Female Reader by @vorrentis (heavy Angst) (2018)

Is it a bit ironic that I'm not really into reading female reader x member if I'm a guy who's gonna read it yet I also read stories that features a ship in TWICE, which members are both female? Well that would be my case of not attempting to give this one a read from Vorrentis' goated TWICE one-shot book on Wattpad. Quick fun fact: Vorrentis is one of my favorite Twice AU authors and my inspiration for starting to write fanfics on my own. Okay, now back to what I was saying, thank goodness my curiosity finally had me check it out by myself a few weeks ago. The summary of this story would be Nayeon and YN, two ex-couples who broke up after Nayeon mysteriously disappeared, and YN didn't know where she went until she found out that she'd be marrying Jeongyeon, whom they both know as a friend of theirs. If you give it a read, you will see how YN would almost curse Nayeon's life to the depths of hell for breaking her heart after what she did. Beware, this story contains LOTS of strong languages because, like I said, it's heavy angst filled with confrontations and arguments. What I love about this is how the author did a great job on making the dialogues felt so real, as if when you were reading it, you can feel the intensity because it's like you're sharing the same room as them as a nosy spectator or let's say you are their child (lol). And oh, since I mentioned about how Nayeon's sinful act devastated YN's vulnerable heart brutally, here comes the mindblowing double twist that would be thrown to you as it reaches the climax. Had me gaping my mouth in shock at the back and forth of revelations.

3.) "Stuck In Fairytales" | TWICE x Male Reader by ZAKY14 (Fluff, Angst) (2020)

I found this one pretty interesting because it reminded me of "Knock Knock"'s storyline in the MV, minus the theorized creepy twist that ONCEs put in there, and when I read it, I was so entertained throughout the chapters. The author, Zaky, is known on Wattpad for writing a bunch of Twice fics, some of which feature other idols too. The story of this one is centered on "Lao Bang,"  the name of the reader here, who accidentally discovered an ancient storybook. He opened it and got sucked in there to be part of every story it contains inside, explaining why this book has arcs that feature some of the popular Disney fairytale characters that TWICE would be portraying as. This one has a sequel by the way, and it will continue to tell Lao Bang's story after he successfully escaped the book.

4.) "The Life I Never Had" | TWICE x Male Reader by Mashimuno (2020)

If you love superheroes and some action/comedy genres like me, this one is definitely for you. “The Life I Never Had” tells the story of YN, a guy who got teleported off Earth since he was 5 years old and grew up to be trained as a bounty hunter in the planet he got thrown at. One day, during a mission he got beaten up badly with his sidekick and forced to retreat onto a nearby habitable planet , and there he ends up at the Earth where he was born which is also where TWICE would be living also in this story (they're still portrayed here as idols, just like in real life, btw). It also has a multiverse concept that we usually see in Marvel and DC films. Read it if you want to see how YN would meet the girls and how his connection with them gets stronger, and it will teach him how to live an unparalleled life that he never experienced in the universe he used to live for his entire life as they get to know themselves more throughout the chapters while facing YN's adversaries from the other planet.

5.) "Sociopath" | Nayeon x Male Reader by @nichuuu (Fluff, Angst, Smut) (2023)

Back in February, I tried to search for some TWICE one-shots on Tumblr because not gonna lie I get tired of seeing bunches of smuts and nothing new in my feed. Then I found this one. Me loves tsundere because of how often I see them in animes, and the way the author made it possible by writing Nayeon's character like that in this story where she is the CEO of her company, famous for being a... well, let's say she is an evil boss who is a huge antisocial until she meets YN, who applied as her 25th secretary (insane, right?). The story is basically about how a devil meets an angel who will slowly change her perception of the reality of life, and through the people around her who will result in her change of heart. The more she also begins to fall in love with our male lead here, they also face some challenges that are related mainly to Nayeon's tragic past that brought her hostile side to emerge and live with it. The prologue was effectively hilarious when I first read it, and I knew right then that I would be reading such an awesome story. I even finished the whole chapter in just a day! It's truly one of the best rom-com TWICE fics I've read, and I highly recommend it.

[arthurs-asclepia]

Please, Please, Please

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆.

⟡ Arthur Morgan x Male Reader

⟡ Warning: Crude language, Minor Violence (I think that's it...)

⟡ Words: 2.3k

⟡ A/N: Raegan here, so I posted part of this in a prior post, but this is the finished version. It was inspired by the song "Please Please Please" by Sabrina Carpenter queen fr fr, you should totally listen to it. Maybe even listen to it while reading this. This is my debut to the tumblr fanfic scene if you will. It's a lil cringe and silly in my opinion, but I wouldn't say it's downright awful for one of my first works. (Sidenote: My hair tie snapped and hit my cheek while I was putting up my hair to write this. The things I do for fanfiction...) I hope you like it and if you don't, don't be too harsh I will cry. I have other ideas and would love to give them to you folks. I also wanna organize my blog to be ⋆Aesthetic⋆ in the coming weeks but we'll see what school has to say about that one PLEASE share any tips for the aesthetic blog making. Anyways I really hope you enjoy.

XOXO - Raegan (I love Dadsea)

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾

Bored. You were bored, so incredibly bored. You felt as if you were ready to turn in for the night even though it was barely 9 in the morning. You were just about to head into your tent to sleep when you heard something. “Y/N” Karen called out, you turned and walked over to her. “Somethin' wrong, Karen?” You asked as curiosity spiked within you with this sudden change of pace. “No no, everything's great! Arthur agreed to take us into town. Finally something fun is happening” She stated excitement dripping from every word. “He told me to tell you to get ready while he fixes up the wagon,” Karen adds, you promptly thank her and set off to gather your bearings. After readying yourself you make your way over to the wagon. Karen, Tilly, and Mary-Beth all sit in the back buzzing with excitement. You smile and make your way over to the front, sitting next to Arthur, where you belong as he put it once. “Ready Y/N?” He says, giving you a slight smile. “Yup, all set” You beam. He takes the reins and prompts the horses to move. Off you go.

You rest your head on his shoulder, and in your mind, you can picture how his lips curl into a bashful grin. The girls begin chattering to which you join them, a fit of laughter ensues shortly after as you all begin conversing with each other. “So Y/N, ya got any plans for your time in town?” Mary-Beth asks. “Hm, well Hosea gave me a cookbook and there’s a recipe in it I’d love to try. Hence I plan to go to the general store for the ingredients.” You reply as she tilts her head smiling with pity. “Ya sure you have the money for all that?” Mary-Beth inquires. You nod “Yes ma’am, been pocketing some money for stuff like this. If I don’t I could always just make Arthur pay.” You state impishly, turning to him as he rolls his eyes. You all laugh and continue talking amongst yourselves. Arthur is quiet for the most part only adding comments and quips here and there. Karen then says something that strikes a chord within you. “How much y’all wanna bet Arthur causes a ruckus and we have to hurry on outta town.” She laughs, the girls all place bets and argue over whether that’ll happen or not, you on the other hand, something in you begins to worry.

You were an outlaw, and many things came with the territory. You know that of course and have long accepted it. That doesn’t mean you like causing problems everywhere you go. In fact, you rather enjoy those calm moments before something happens, leaving your reputation in its wake. You wait for the girls to be distracted before you begin speaking to Arthur with hushed words.  “Arthur, please, please, please promise me nothing will happen” You plead looking at him with a pitiful expression. “Y/N we’re outlaws, you know that. Course something’s bound to happen.”  You look at him with a vaguely upset expression, he can practically hear you thinking ‘Arthur Please’. He purses his lips and responds. “Oh alright, I promise nothing will happen,” he says. “Better be some damn good food” he grumbles before you laugh and rest your head on his shoulder. “I love you, Arthur Morgan.” You say. “I love you more, Y/N L/N” he sighs as you fix your gaze on the road ahead.

Finally, you arrived at your destination, you all agreed on a time to return to the wagon and split off. You and Arthur wave to the girls and begin walking to the store. Making your way through town you pass all sorts of shops, a barber, a cafe, a saloon. A drunk man shoulder chucks you walking into the saloon, this ticks Arthur off as you notice his brows furrow. Subtly you entangle your pinky finger with his, as if to say ‘Arthur… we had a deal’ he gets the message and you continue your walk to the store. At last, you made it to the store and began browsing, shelf by shelf, gathering what you need. You gave the things to Arthur so he could take them to the counter as you go get something you forgot from a shelf nearby. The man who bumped into you at the saloon enters with two other men following. You grab the item and start walking to the counter when the man bumps into you and drops his drink. This sets him off as Arthur walks over to your side. “Watch it, dirty tramp!” He yells as you begin apologizing. You glance at Arthur and notice his jaw clenched and his fists begin to ball. ‘Oh no!' you thought. “Sorry ain’t gonna get me another beer, you good for nothing rat!” He yells as he goes to hit you. Arthur's fuse was blown and to your dismay, he began wailing on the man. “Don’t fucking touch him” Arthur yelled as he began beating the drunkard. The other men started supporting their friend, Arthur held his own though, and soon an actual fight was taking place. You drown out the storekeepers' yelling as you begin begging. “Arthur c'mon” you plead. “That’s enough” you try again. “Arthur, please let’s go!” You yell pulling on his jacket. This gets to him as he turns to face you. The other men helped their comrade up. “You’re not going anywhere!” he shouted. You grab Arthur’s hand and run out of the store. They chase after you as you look for anywhere to lose the three men hunting you down. BINGO.    

You waited in an alleyway to lose them, God knows how long you waited there. As soon as the coast was clear you both began walking towards the wagon. The girls were already waiting by it, all set to return to camp. “God dammit Arthur, you promised!” You began, you were about 4 feet away from the wagon when you began delivering your tirade. Karen, Tilly, and Mary-Beth all watched but didn’t dare utter a single word. “Why couldn’t you just stay calm, just this once, instead of flying off the handle?” You weren’t yelling per se but you definitely weren’t talking normally either. You didn’t care that the girls were watching, hell you didn’t care if the whole damn town was watching. Right now you were pissed the fuck off. Tears welled up in your eyes as you searched for anything in his, oh how you love those beautiful eyes, even if I didn’t quite feel like you did at the moment. “Y/N I- I’m sorr-” Arthur began only for you to cut him off, his expression softening and turning into one of distress. Or was it remorse? You couldn’t tell, hell you didn’t even care, all you knew was that he was upset at something. “Save it, let’s just return to camp, we’ve embarrassed ourselves enough here as is.” You cried before turning and finding a seat in the back of the wagon, not in the front, not next to him. 

The girls followed you in. Tilly rubbed your shoulder as you tried your best to stop crying. You leaned your head on her shoulder until all your tears became quiet sniffles, and so began the tense and very awkward ride home. Karen tried melting the tension by cracking jokes and indulging in idle conversation. The other girls joined in, but it was to no avail. You just stared at the scenery you passed, and Arthur focused on the road. Your mind was a growing storm of thoughts. You worried about going back to that town, how embarrassed you were about you yelling at Arthur in front of your friends. How none of this would have happened had you. Just. Bought. The man. Another. Drink. You’ve dealt with Micah’s drunkenness and nothing tops that. Your feelings began growing and you felt sick, you began feeling something else. Guilt? 

Finally, after experiencing tension so thick one could cut it with a knife, you all arrived at camp. Grabbing your bag you jump out of the wagon and run around looking for Hosea as tears begin welling in your eyes. You saw him and began walking to him dragging your feet. At the sound of your footsteps, he looked up from whatever book he was reading and went to greet you. “Y/N how was your tr– What’s wrong my boy?” he stated. Worry plagued his features. You sit next to him on the log he was using as a bench and fall into his arms crying softly. Luckily you were in a secluded part of camp so you felt safe being completely vulnerable. He kissed your head before asking what happened to you once more. “ ‘Sea I messed up.” You sobbed. “I made Arthur promise nothing would happen then he got into a fight on my behalf. I yelled at him and treated him poorly. He was fighting. On my behalf. And I yelled at him.” you cried as Hosea pulled you closer. “Y/N my dear child, things happened and I’m sure you regret saying what you did. You’ll be okay.” He said, stroking your head. “It’s all my fault, I shoulda been more careful. Now because of me that voice in his head that insults him, tells him he’s old and no one could love him. It’s probably even worse now” You wept. Hosea felt terrible at the reminder of Arthur’s insecurities and seeing you in tears wasn’t helping. He pulled your face up to his, cupping your cheek with his hand, as he kissed your forehead. “Y/N none of it is your fault. I know firsthand you two love each other more than anything.” He said. “I’ve seen you two go from teenagers yearning for the other to young adults who decided they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together, and so on. You love him, don’t let him think otherwise,” Hosea spoke softly. “I need to make it up to him.” You say hugging Hosea and getting up. “I know you will,” Hosea said, giving you a look of encouragement. You see, Arthur may be Hosea’s son, but to Hosea, you're his moon and stars.

Shortly after you set off to find your boyfriend, Hosea was joined by yet another troubled soul. “Hosea… I messed up” Arthur said, taking a seat next to Hosea, bottle in hand and cheeks stained with tears. Hosea put an arm around his son's shoulders, ears ready to listen. “I promised Y/N nothing would happen, and then I lost my temper. I made a fool of him. Why couldn’t I just do the simple thing he asked of me?” He said as tears began rolling down his face, like wax from a candle. “Oh Arthur I’m sure you had a good reason for losing your temper, and I’m positive Y/N’s reputation will heal with time.” Hosea chimed. “I managed to piss him off.” He said, taking a swig from his bottle. “He deserves someone better than an ugly bastard like me.” He said staring out into the tree line. Hosea's heart felt as if it was being stabbed by a hundred knives. He hated seeing his son like this. “Come now Arthur, he loves you, he chose you because he thinks the world of you.” Hosea declared tightening the arm on Arthur's shoulder. “Bullshit–” Arthur began before Hosea cut him off. “Arthur, he’s loved you for so long, he certainly won’t stop anytime soon. He wants you and only you, even after he dies he hopes to be with you.” Hosea stated sternly. “His worst fear is losing you, regardless of whether you leave or get killed. Don’t let his fears come to pass, boy” Hosea stated looking into his child's eyes. “Now go remind him you’re not going anywhere,” Hosea asserted as he nudged Arthur. “Well alright…” Arthur said, getting up, puzzled by Hosea’s sudden shift in tone.

You looked for Arthur all over camp, you worried he left camp and was gonna do something stupid. You paused under a tree scanning for any signs of him. That’s when you heard someone clear their throat behind you. “Hope I’m not interrupting something,” Arthur said, frowning. You turned, walking over to him, every emotion in you swirling like a typhoon as your eyes watered. “Arthur, I’m so sorry. I know you were just looking out for me; I shouldn’t have yelled at you; I shouldn’t have made it seem like I pushed you away. I–” You stopped mid-sentence, your emotions too strong to continue. Arthur took your chin in his fingers tilting your face to meet his. The sorrow in his eyes pained you. “Y/N I should’ve kept my temper in check. I made you a promise. I’m sorry I went back on my word.” He said, taking a breath before continuing. “I won’t lie to you, I don’t understand why you want me, why you're so fond of me. I’d be lying if I didn’t say I’ve considered leaving, thinking you’d be better off with someone else,” he said his expression shifting to a more neutral one. “I don’t care if you think you’re bad for me. I know you are the best thing to ever happen to me. I promise I will always love you, even when you don’t.” You said as a passionate flame grew within you. “I promise you’re never getting rid of me then. You bet yer ass I’m not breaking that one.” Arthur proclaimed grinning slightly. “Good,” you said as you wrapped your arms around him. He pulled you close to him in response. Neither of you wanted to let go, so you stayed there. Holding one another for just a little bit longer. Little did you know Hosea was watching from afar, ingredients in hand. You definitely were gonna go all out on that meal, and Arthur definitely was gonna get as much as he wanted.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾

[just-1other-nerd]

Okay so I know it is strange to become a Voltron reboot fan in the year of 2024 but here I am.

I don't really know why I didn't watch it earlier given that I really, really liked the She-Ra reboot back in 2020 and Netflix recommended Voltron to me and comments on Catradora edits said Klance walked so that Catradora could run. And now I wanted to watch it and finally did so because it's about to be taken down and I desperately needed to know what Klance was about as long as I still had the chance and I just knew that I'd regret not watching it. It's shitty that Netflix is pulling this good show that was exclusively on their site and I am mad af about that.

I liked the series overall but Klance is endgame to me so after finishing season 8 tonight I watched some edits. Also earlier this week I read a 57k fanfic with this ship in less than 24 hours on a school day, I did not get much sleep that night.