#getting art of my characters makes me so happy ;-;

[oshinohoshi]

Oshi no Ko chapter 166 thoughts - the end of all things

So uh... the only positive thing I can say here besides the beautiful Ai art is that I felt sad reading the page where Miyako was hugging Ruby. Everything else left me completely empty

This chapter is either:

A) A self-aware ending meant to show that life is suffering and the idol industry will suck out your soul if you let it

B) Outsourced to someone who skimmed OnK for 30 seconds on Wikipedia before putting pen to paper

It has to be A, right? You can't tell me that the same author wrote both of these pages without the right being ironic

But I don't think so because big brained Akane is the one clumsily narrating this crappy montage masquerading as a real ending

Aqua died for nothing. His sister is now a soulless cog in the idol machine

Ruby is mimicking Ai's speech - "Lies are an outstanding kind of love... We pile on the lies and no matter how hard things get, we sing and act happy onstage. It's a fun job!" But she forgot the rest of it: "Only, I'd like the 'being happy' part to be real. Nobody notices, but we have hearts and lives of our own. Happiness as a mother. Happiness as an idol. Normally you'd have to pick one, but I want both. Ai Hoshino is a greedy girl"

Ai wasn't only a misunderstood girl who worked hard to please her fans. That was a big part of her story but she also broke the rules to create her own family, her own happiness

Ruby, on the other hand, seems to have no real desires anymore, she's just following a path she believes her mother and Aqua paved for her. Never mind that Aqua only wanted it in the end because she wanted it and Ai just wanted her kids to be happy

You can tell that Akasaka is patting himself on the back for making a cyclical narrative where Ruby becomes Ai 2.0 by being commodified, scrutinized, and idolized like Ai was

But it's such a flimsy parallel when it comes to the theme of lies because lying to hide your grief =/= "lies are love" which was the only way Ai knew how to frame her genuine desire to love

And Ai's "I love you" to her kids was true whereas Ruby has swallowed her own lie that being an idol is fun even when you're just doing it to outrun your pain

What this chapter showed us is that the meaning of Ruby's life is to be Ruby of B Komachi and she was put on Earth to sing pop songs. Because that's what Ai did, right? If I remember correctly, her final words were "I'm so glad I got to be an idol #blessed"

My God was the Dome concert soulless. Miyako and Ichigo crying happy tears is a punch to the gut. Doesn't Miyako know her daughter is still hurting?

The last scene is so fucking depressing

Ruby, are you okay? Blink twice if you still remember your life outside the idol industry!

The last two pages work really well as horror. She has a brilliant smile but you can tell that she's dead inside. She's got more merch on her table than photos. Why doesn't she have a corkboard of family photos? Although I more or less have this Ai plushie and it's pretty cute so I'll give this a pass because it's hilarious

I guess the takeaway here is to live for others and life is painful so just grin and bear it. Oh yeah, and inspire other young women to join an industry where they get to act happy and lose their humanity. Cool

I mean I get that it's supposed to be about moving on with your life even while grieving and that's a good message, sure, but Aka's insistence on using the word "lies" multiple times as if saying it makes it make sense ruins the whole thing

The most insane part is that this chapter is a wholehearted endorsement of the lies sold by the entertainment/idol industry

I haven't even said anything about anyone besides Ruby because what's the point? Aka didn't have time to do justice to any of the characters I grew to love

It's clear something went wrong with the timeline of wrapping up OnK. No artist wants to execute a final chapter like this. I'm convinced the film reel edges are Aka and Mengo's way of telling the reader, "we know this is a shitty clips show so don't @ us on Twitter about it"

But it's so much worse than that. Aka really decided to tear to shreds everything he worked so hard on for 4 years. Damn

This is my favorite manga and I'll always love that it gave me Ai, my most beloved character of all time, but this leaves an extremely bitter aftertaste. It's really hard to believe that the same person who wrote vol 1 wrote this.

OnK has been pretty important to me. Reading weekly, chatting with fans, and reaching dangerous levels of Ai brain rot has actually been a helpful distraction. TBH I've been a little too invested in it but sometimes you need escapism. So it's crazy that I'm kind of glad it's over.

But this is why fanfic, fanart, and your own headcanons exist. In another universe, this manga wrapped up beautifully and I was depressed for weeks because I couldn't look forward to it anymore. In this universe, at least we're all suffering together here at the end of all things.

And at least the little Hoshino family is still adorable. Too bad Ai is dead, Aqua is dead, and Ruby desperately needs grief counseling. But NEVER MIND. Look at Ai's smile and the twins' faces. This was the Oshi no Ko I really loved.

[siffrinreflections]

(re; ready to hear beef)

Always o7

there are several stages to the beef i have, but starting off:

toxic positivity - everyone says they're suprised when something bad happens in the fandom because "everyone's so nice!", like the previous isat-confessions blog or the person who shipped bonnie and siffrin. it's almost impossible to keep a fandom safe if you're constantly thinking, "no that wouldnt happen here, everyone here is too nice!". and as a part of this, most people are afraid to say anything against the dev themselves. i noticed it a lot with some of the questionable official merch - and ESPECIALLY with how the physical copy covers turned out. several people were thinking it looked badly made, but were surprised to see others felt the same/scared to say anything out against it. why? because the fandom has nurtured this idea that Nothing Can Go Wrong Here. this is also in part with how the dev treats their audience and the franchise as a whole.

refusing deviation - at first this sounds weird, but i mean that the majority of the fandom refuses to create their own idea from the game that isn't 100% what the dev wanted it. so many asks are about what is "okay" to make based off it, what they're allowed to do with the characters and what they're allowed to change. everything bends at the dev's words, i have rarely seen someone actually make something their own based on the game. i have yet to see (in my personal experience here), someone take one of the characters and change them entirely based to what they'd like the story to be. sure, people have made AU's based on if mira or isa or odile or any other character was the one in the loops instead, but all of it is stringent on if it Fits With What The Dev Said About The Game. instead of taking the game they loved and making it their own, it has to be part of the rules that were given. i mean look at the undertale fandom, look at all the sans' versions and the different AU's that were made based on the game. in the ISAT fandom there are few AU's that aren't just meant to be sequels or spinoffs to the game itself. this also makes it hard to have a differing opinion on official art, on popular ships (like isafrin and sifloop), and having differing thoughts to the dev. people are simply afraid to disagree because it would disrupt such a "nice and welcoming community"

romanticization of mental illness - this ties into the toxic positivity, but i can't name how many times someone has said "im so siffrin!" and enjoyed that they refused to communicate with their friends. i have witnessed firsthand just how easy it is to fall into the thought that being siffrincore is funny and cute and will get me the same happy ending that siffrin had. but it's not, and as a fandom there is some idea that being "So siffrin" is desirable. i also really don't appreciate how quick the fandom is to push plurality on it's members. over half the people i used to follow turned out to be plural - and while i have nothing against those of plurality - i am a little dubious of it's reality when each one of them had dozens of asks pushing that they had to be plural from the experiences they had. armchair diagnosing really does not work when you are only seeing a few posts a day. and even then instead of offering resources to prove or deny their suspicions, it is once again glorified into "youre finally one of us now! youre so siffrincore!"

i mean legitimately no hate with all of this. i am easily proven wrong with these and i understand that, and if you align with any of these that's none of my concern. but it really is turning into DCA fandom 2.0 and if it wasnt for the fact that selling merch is frowned upon by The Godly Dev we'd have so many more money scams than we'd know what to do with. if you dont like something please just say it and don't keep the peace.

[canmom]

like. you know. viewing life by way of performance of this or that category is not exactly a new sentiment. authors have been getting into that one since long before i was born. I've read my share of allegorical stories about masks.

but anyway. last night i went to a munch for the first time, which of you're not familiar is bdsm speak for a social gathering. i had a good time, thanks! kink people are, it turns out, mostly a species of nerd, and if there's a type of person i naturally get on with, it's nerdy trans women. sometimes hot women are very excited to talk about bicycles, and i for one am glad for this. anyway, this is just context.

one thing I have often found a little disconcerting when approaching kink related stuff is that everyone seems to have a very keen idea of how they fit into various boxes. there's quite a lot of boxes fitting all kinds of different scenario and fantasy. and me being a perpetual contrarian, i am often left wondering, why is it like this? why is everyone either a dom or a sub, top or bottom, etc etc? how is everyone so damn sure of it?

i witnessed a conversation which, while it did not directly address any such thing, did feel like it proved enlightening. a girl was being teased for claiming to be a top when she clearly wasn't. she was evidently enjoying it, feigning indignation, just as her interlocutor (forgive me, i can't help using words like interlocutor) was feigning annoyance at her antics, a back and forth that naturally led up to a kiss. it felt to me like i was watching a movie, or studying animation: the gestures and body language, tilt of head or lean forwards, the rhythm of the scene, the acting.

and obviously, or so it seems now, it felt like acting because it was. it was a scene that both 'players' were happy to perform for each other and everyone else at the table. i don't mean that it was scripted, but that they got to express the kind of 'character' they wanted. as a newbie onlooker, i played my role too, which was simply laughing at the appropriate moments.

now (this is the ten in the kishōtenketsu), i have in the past written about roleplaying theory - maybe on here, maybe somewhere else? anyway, i tend to look at it through analogy with two related art forms, which are improv comedy and pro wrestling.

improv - and please forgive me if I make any theory errors here, it's been a hot minute - tells you to 'yes, and': to keep the momentum of the scene going by taking what has been contributed to the fiction so far and adding to it, rather than negating a contribution. it further has the concept of an 'offer': you introduce an idea with some potential and hand it off to the other person to iterate on.

wrestling is a kind of athletic improv show, and it has its own forest of complicated jargon, which i know a fair bit about despite not watching wrestling. one of them is to 'sell': when a wrestler performs an attack, the other wrestler's job is to act like they've been hit, by flinching, staggering, etc. then there is the 'gimmick' - the idea of the wrestler's character, which must also be sold with the help of their partner, e.g. by commenting on it, or having some emotional reaction. the aim is to 'get over' by having the audience buy in and respond appropriately (e.g. cheering or booing).

both of these constructs are applicable to roleplaying games - both TTRPGs and informal MMO roleplaying. when you are playing a character, you have a character concept you want to 'get over' to the other characters. as a player in a roleplaying game, you also have the job of helping the other players to convey their character. how do you do this? by reacting to stuff (in character, but also out), and weaving it into the story so that it affects other things. nothing is 'real' in an RPG until it's acknowledged by someone else. in TTRPGs, that someone else tends to be the GM, but it can and should also be the other player characters. very few game texts actually spell this out, with the only exception I can think of being Chuubo's which actually formalises a bit.

how do you go about doing this in practice? that's where the improv principles come in. some RPGs, like Fiasco, have an explicit scene framing mechanic, where a player is given narrative authority to set up an interaction. this is, in improv terms, the offer. but even without such a mechanic explicitly being in the rules, you have the opportunity to create setups and follow through on them by adding something new, fitting the bounds of the scene. you're not aiming for comedy most of the time, but you're still fundamentally playing 'yes, and'.

ok, so. every conversation is kind of the same, right? here is my autistic-ass metaphor: it's a game, you have a role to play, you're trying to get over your 'character' for this interaction, and facilitating other people in getting over theirs. the more you interact with a person, the more you get a sense of the dynamic you tend to play. when you meet someone or indeed start a new conversation you're making offers: here's a thing i could talk with you about, which is to say, a role to play for this interaction. when you say something, you try to leave an opening to respond, or provide a natural branch point to change topic. just as your character in a roleplaying game (or for that matter a novel) gets more substantial and multi-dimensional the more situations you put them in, the more you interact with someone the more complex a role you can play with them. (something something Shannon entropy)

crucially roleplaying doesn't require predictability. there are always multiple ways to take something forwards, depending what specifically you 'yes and' or 'no but' with.

ok, but then, returning to the beginning (it's ketsu time!), all these roles - well, why does D&D have classes, Apocalypse World have playbooks, Fiasco its tables of archetypes? well, they're prompts - simple stories that can help you get past the blank page problem, and inject certain ideas into the story when needed. playing a class in a game doesn't say anything in particular about 'who you are', any more than who you play in a fighting game. if you find you like playing certain characters or classes more than others, you might end up with a 'main', but that's only something you figure out by trying it, and it's not some kind of eternal commitment.

by the same token... well, it pretty much writes itself from here, right?

I've probably just reinvented judith butler but nerdier, but hey, the autism. anyway I'm already doing this plenty - by various word choices, by repeatedly telling you I'm autistic and whathaveyou (i didn't always do that), I'm pretty much setting up some gimmicks right here in this post. and every post on this blog. the people who are really good at posting, and equally socialising, seem to do this kind of effortlessly! but i think the evidence seems to be it can be learned. I can try out different builds. if it doesn't work, well, gg, I'll learn from it for next time - and if it's not fun... well, i don't need to play that class again. that's all this big intimidating sexuality thing actually is.

it was literally that simple! i had all the blocks already i just had to put them together! maddening

everything is roleplaying, except roleplaying, which is improv. it's all so obvious when you put it that way...

[egophiliac]

(almost) four years in, and I finally had time to draw something for the anniversary! woo! 🎉🎉🎉

[deathricedrawn]

i'm ready to try

[hinamie]

congrats on your recovery n all yuuji but unfortunately for you I thought the scars were cool >:/

[thatssolavellan]

Oh my god. I finished. I finished the g a m e

I literally JUST finished. So I'm collecting my thoughts rn but I already have some opinions. Some of them need time, but I already have to say: I now understand why so much solavellans had strong feelings for it, but for me, it was good.

(Some late game spoilers under the cut + English is not my first language)

Overall, I like how they managed the Solas/Mythal relationship. It didn't bother me except for the absence of at least a strong citation about the Well of Sorrows, which looked like a huge choice in DAI, and I think it could be included along the Inquisitor's plot. But it's ok for me, I guess. *shrugs*

I think I understand now why that many people got upset. We had 10 years to invest in those characters, and our headcanons are impossible to squeeze in a game which wasn't even about Solas and Lavellan. So, it was impossible to make sense for everyone since they had only one "Solavellan ending". Leaving to go with Solas wasn't a real choice to every Lavellans. I still don't know if I liked it more because it fits my headcanon like a glove, or if I liked it because it is much less tragic that I expected lol (those words from Corinne saying that it would hurt haunted me). But I really think that it was a fair ending for both of the characters.

And, about the ending of the game in general, my biggest surprise was the Varric thing. I got really angry when he didn't die at the prologue after Solas stabbed him. I hate this Gandalf stuff when a major character dies and comes back like a miracle, just for make us suffer then immediately soothing these feelings. So when I found he was actually dead it was really a plot twist - I didn't even imagine it during the game. Same with the character who died with Ghilan'nain (for me, it was Harding).

I really liked all the new characters and the writing in general. Some bits felt kinda "rushed" for me, but not too much. The quest about Solas's regrets was a great way to put new players into the lore and answered everything we needed about what concerned the game. And I found it really fun, like us people digging around the lore and our wild theories in Reddit and here in Tumblr lol

Anyways. I'm relieved the ending didn't totally destroy the characters or put them in a lot of situations which didn't feel true for them. I trusted the work of the writers since the start, but with so many problems during the development (including the awful layoffs), I expected the worst. And I'm glad BioWare sticked with its expertise. As a fan of ME2, I loved the combat, progressions, maps and everything. And the "cartoonized" art style bothered me in the beginning but I kept my mind open, and now I even like it.

(Still hate Hans Zimmer's OST tho. Doesn't even get close to the toes of DAI and Trespasser OSTs.)

And look at her. She's a fucking looker. House de Riva has only the finest 🧑‍🍳👌 Having Viago and Teia made me rush immediately to the Antivan Crows and I'm not disappointed. Being latina I had my share of annoyance with all the stereotypes, but hey... I also really like coffee.

Lucanis's romance was a downer, okay, but it gives us more room to fanfiction lmao (here we go again). I'll cope with it doing a new gameplay and romancing Emmrich >:)

Dragon Age has a special place in my heart forever and I feared for the franchise. So I'm relieved and happy for being here.

Shout out for all us Solavellans. I remember when I saw people mocking us in the fandom for asking for more Solavellan content in the game. Devs, I love you all. Here's for better days in the future.

I didn't even finish the game yet and I almost threw up of anxiety when I was going to meet my inquisitor for the 2nd time. And since I cannot get off Tumblr I already had several spoilers about the ending. Almost regretting asking for all these cameos with Ellana. Boy I'm SO ✨not ready✨ for this

[veryasianfailure]

Was planning on making some character pins for myself but never got around the pin making part The characters are from the Lil' Pootis series from @quazies on yt!

[zodiac-monkey]

[lilybug-02]

Bribed with Chocolate. The way it should be.

Part 22 || First || Previous || Next

--Full Series--

More to come as this is a two-parter. But you know how I am with schedules.

Bonus:

I think this was an equally possible reaction from Chara.

[zoynkzz]

Thought a lot about the Close fam, doodling ensued

[sillyfairygarden]

90 minute leyendecker study b4 bed. heard cleo has a cat cafe this season :swoons:

[sharkylass]

Okay, before I talk about au stuff-ART FIGHT HAS OFFICIALLY ENDED!!

This year I was super busy, and yet this has somehow turned out to me my most productive year on artfight to date with 24 total attacks (and I wanted to do more, but again, this month had me in a chokehold) SO HERE ARE MY CONTRIBUTIONS!

In order, credit for character designs goes to: First two are for @rose-petal123 next is @princess-self-shipping , @clawcakes , @sweetkiller690 , @camilieroart , @anixolt , @artilite, @krdrawsnext two are both for @kazehita @bleeding-fairy-helmet , Curb Animates (on youtube), @donniipao , @wonder-of-the-stars , @bluesgras , @feloplip , @princemonarchempress, @tfrost , @tealgoat , @sketchz42 , @saltyhibiscus And the last two are for @sharoo

(For some reason the tags aren't working, but if you're curious, I mentioned everyone in the notes in the same order!)

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

your art is absolutely amazing

i just went thru all of the poorly drawn mdzs and it was amazing seeing your art develop!

you just made my morning, thabkyou <3

Thank you so much for the kind words, and for cheering me on as I continue to learn!

[beatcroc]

there's no way the bathroom at peppino's pizza is actually that big but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . hey ummm anyway.... i care them...... anyway there's a lil ramble on my take on fake pep's like psyche or whatever in tags on the og post if ur into that kinda thing :y

hey! it's a series! fake peppino world tour: [noise] [noisette] [peppino]<- u are here [gustavo] [gerome] [noisette again]

[egophiliac]

i don't think u need to worry about poppy ikemen anymore, new ride kamens character is kr kamui who is our lord and savior dan kuroto

DAN THE DANGEROUS ZOMBIE MAN!!!!!! I was SO excited when I saw the reveal, he is absolutely the funniest possible character choice hands-down. oh my god. I'm so glad he made it into this game.

also Kamui just looks incredible. instant favorite. this is the kind of man I can picture standing naked on a cliffside and screaming at everyone about his imminent ascension towards godhood. he is the incarnation of that one iconic Gina Linetti scene.