#genuinely so happy someone understands the vision
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trixicjadeharley · 2 months ago
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so i have to see that 365 edit with shinji by default when its done now i'm seated in that theater like its ryuki episode final 🗣
KYA ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ GRABS AHOLD OF YOU . I PROMISE THAT when i MAKE IT you will be the first person to receive it. you will cast your judgement on it and it will decide whether i go to hell or not. but I Will make you Proud..
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boxwinebaddie · 5 months ago
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hi nina! do you have any other songs that you think cd would cover? i just really liked new perspective and i think ur music taste is rlly cool :3
d'awww!!! hi there, sweet pea! <3
tysm for your ask but, before you start reading ( because this message got VERY long ), i just want to let everyone know that i used this ask to explain some Very Complex Ravenstan/Callgirl Fake Dating Lore...so if you are interested in that, it starts towards the middle of this ask...it's a lil chaotic, but i tried to make it as interesting and clear as i could! no obligation to read, ofc, as always, but i did want to preface this ask with that info, so you know this one is
*Secretly An Important RM Lore Ask.*
but back to what i was doing ( screaming ):
— because aAAAAAAAAAA!!!! c': <333
i am not even joking, you guys, despite the fact that my fic is based almost entirely around Music, i avoided answering music-related asks for so LONG bc i was legitimately so nervous about it being negatively perceived or read for filth on here, which, i Know, is silly because it's my fanfic and what i say goes, i can't change my music taste anymore than i can change the way my dna loops, but...idk.
like, i feel like A Lot of people are self conscious abt their music taste, but my social anxiety/inferiority complex can get so gnarly that i actually get Nervous when people ask me about what kind of music i like and i never EVER sit shot gun in cars bc i am...scared to aux. :/
iiiiiit's...That Bad. ( nina, please get therapy. )
i also feel like people in this fandom can get Very Intense about what kind of music they associate with the boys/what music the boys listen to and are FRIGHTENINGLY QUICK to rip people to shreds over opinions that don't align with theirs or aren't obscure or 'cool' enough.
bc of that, i try to be Very Lowkey on this blog because the larger part of this fandom and the criminally insane level at which they escalate petty fights over canon/fanon, like to the point that they are frothing at the mouth and start doxing people...gives me Extreme Stress. which, in my line of work, i actually CANNOT have happen.
tldr; i want absolutely NO part of it and like my lil corner.
thank you for keeping it Safe. <3
AND THANK YOU FOR ENJOYING MY MUSIC TASTE!!! EEEE c: <3 THAT IS SO REASURRING AND HEALING FOR ME TO HEAR!!!! MUSIC TO MY EARS, BABY! LITERALLY! THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THAAAANK YOU! *holds you* *squishes you* *kisses ur head*
istg, if nothing else the fact that i have a bunch of you rocking out to New Perspective and positively associating it with my fanfic means that i have done my job and that's a legacy i'm willing to die with.
i'm being so serious, i feel like if rm was a tv show, it would play as the outro to every episode...but like a nice, soft, raw version w/ ravenstan on acoustic guitar to contrast the hard ass cd cover of style by tswizz that i think would open every episode...smh, nina, please, pleease stop imagining your unfinished, crack-fanfic as a netflix og series. >.>
BUT!!! okay!!!! in vein of trying not to worry about the perception of my music taste or what other people want from me...tHIS IS A KIND OF CONTREVERSIAL TAKE BUT I TIED IT TO THE PLOT, OKAY?
so, as a little nina lore and for context, when i was in elementary school around like 4th/5th grade, i was listening to like a lot of early y2k bangers, ig. dirty little secret by all american rejects, hey there delilah by the plain white tees, girlfriend by avril lavigne core, etc.
( just to make you giggle, i also had a ps2 and there was a series of video games called singstar that were some off shoot of rockband/gh that had mics you plugged directly into the system...pls note my high score on sk8r boi really should be put in the guinness world records, like if you held a gun to my head and told me to sing that song, i not only would i fuck it up but i would LIVE, baby! better luck next time! )
...it was also around early disney channel times ( the disney channel games with the team colors...that was my OLYMPICS, bitch! ) and i had this Disney Pop Hits Vol...1? i think? cd i used to play on the prehistoric radio thing in my room and my favorite song on it was...
pop princess by the click five.
AND I KNOW!!! I KNOOOOOW!!!! controversial take, but i am sorry, THAT SONG FUCKS!!!! THAT SONG IS SOOOO AWESOME!!!!!
and i feel like when ravenstan was fake dating call girl during the great hate south park embark, cd covered it: i am picturing a less finger-bang, btr, disney channel esqe sound and more of a pop-punk, pedal to the metal, electric guitar type, edgy rockstar boy typa beat.
but Yes, i think ravenstan covered it or idk i really think that it was made FOR call girl. and it was BAD ASF. i also think bc tcf wrote that song about hannah montana ( iconic ), and bc call girl is basically the whole internet's e-girl bubblegum pop princess in my fanfic, it just...
makes...Sense.
am i making sense? do we see the vision? aka rs in his lil pants w/ the ripped red and black flannel tied around his waist, fallin to his knees, singing his heart out, pointing at her, winking? PPL DIIIIIIIIIED.
and by people, i do mean jerseykyle n bebe who were MAD AS HELL,
-- but also tapping their toe...smh.
it was both very cool and very annoying. RIP.
( ...do i have jersey and bebe make out during the pop princess call girl tribute as mlm/wlw solidarity? HEEEELP ICOOONIC *jk vibrating with stress and anger vc* barbara, i need you to do somethin for me don't ask questions, i'll explain later, It's Important sdks MESSY! )
BUT OKAY!!!! SPEAAAAKING OF THEM AND THAT AND CALLGIRL AND RAVEN OF CRIMSON DAWN DATING!!!! i wanted to give you some lore and some spoilery plot about that/them bc it is burning a Hole in my brain...i must discuss r.s. and call girl becaaaause
~Its....Complicated.~
ANYWAYS!!!! IMPORTANT PLOT TIME!!!!
so, for more context: i am currently working on another ask abt how ike found out that jerseykyle/ravenstan used to be dating and during that conversation in kyle's room about three days into the sp trip, CONCURRENTLY somewhere Else, ravenstan and call girl are getting ready to do some flashy PR thing like go on a date/get din, idk.
BUT RIGHT BEFORE IT: ravenstan and call girl are alone together, and ravenstan, who, i am not even kidding you, is sooo fucking Pissed that this is EVEN HAPPENING because kyle is super mad at him, was like you are Actually Dead to me, WILL NOT TALK TO HIM...
( which without spoiling too much -- is actually why ike can tell that somethin Fucked Up is happening because j.k. is super aggressive and loud and is not afraid to Fuck Your Shit Up...but has not laid a FINGER on raven of crimson dawn...and actually, seems to not even want to be Near him, barely acknowledges his existence, leaves rooms that he is in and is Radio Silent around him...WHICH IS TWICE AS SCARY AS J.K. YELLING AND TRYING TO KILL YOU. so, uhh, Not fucking...Good, you guys. ike was like...this is...not fucking normal. )
but again, he cannot tell kyle what is going on bc he might actuuuuallly get MURDERED??? uh???
anyways, in whatever secure, secluded space rae/cg are in ( its somewhere private, i pictured a dressing room of sorts, like a makeup trailer, somewhere they have to take pics ) stan is Extremely Straight Up with her and says something to the effect of:
"i have no idea what you think this is or what you want this to be or what they told you, but we are not dating and this...is NOT. Real."
and call girl ( aka wendy whose identity is a secret to EVERYONE, No One has seen the bottom half of call girl's face...Ever. she changes her wigs everyday, they are Very Elaborate and is always in a very high tech face mask that covers her face from the nose down and uses a voice modulator to mask her speaking voice...a mysterious queen ) oddly enough seems completely relieved by this statement and is like
*squints*
"don't worry, Emo Boy. feeling is mutual. like, no offense, but you are seriously...not my type. Ew. trust me, i don’t want to do this either but,
— I Have To."
wHICHSHDLSKDHLSD SHE GUTTED HIM HELP. he was *gigantic stan slow eye blinks in shock* like "right, okay, Ow. that was...Mean." kshdlksdls but then was "--but i am glad we...agree. i Also HAVE To. not because of publicity, it's...Deeper than that...i can't really ta--"
to which call girl, locking eyes with him, dead seriously, lowering her modulated voice is like...
"it's tenorman, right?
He Threatened You."
and r.s, gagged! Again!!! is like
"holy shit, he THREATENED /YOU/ TOO?!?!"
and call girl nods very slowly and starts to say
"he told me if i didn't do it he would..."
and rs with the same kind of mounting horror whispers
" — Kill Everyone You Love And Care About?"
which, at this point, folks, they are both like...
...WOAH.
bc they realize they are both stuck in the same torture chamber together, they Both got cornered into this really elaborate ruse and have to keep it up in order to keep the people that they love Safe and it's...A Lot. it...really is. but it's also sort of freeing and cathartic to knowing you are not alone going through what is pretty much the worst thing that has ever happened to you in your entire life.
i also feel like...there is this natural bond. this Energy between them. like they understand/see each other and feel...safe with one another.
and call girl, guard still up, dips a toe in uncharted water, and goes:
"well...since were partners in crime now and have to live a lie in public...i think we at least owe it to each other in private...
...to be Real."
she offers this bc they have reached an understanding, an impasse, a standstill, a draw of sorts. and there is a thick tension...as well as this crescendoing vulnerability that hangs the air with her ultimatum as they stare warily at each other, strangers, both wearing still wearing their masks, call girl physically in hers and stan in his metaphorical one doing the dark, raspy smoke and mirrors raven voice bc he is...not sure about her in the same way that she is...
...still not sure abt him.
( they are basically that one spiderman meme where both the spidermans are holding each other at gun point. ) and it's a huge Risk to indulge her request, but again...they both have everything to lose.
and no one...but Eachother.
so he indulges her very tentatively and counters:
"alright...then, tell me something Real, call girl."
to which she nods, closes her eyes and goes. "fine. my real name..."
call girl trails off, reaches up to tap the voice modulator on her mask, turns it off, reaches out her rhine-stoned, sequined, hot pink faux leather gloved hand out to shake his and in her real voice, says,
" — Is Wendy."
and this...is a Very BIG Deal.
again, no one has ever heard call girl's voice before. no one knows what her name is or Anything about her. she doesn't even preform live, she does virtual concerts and is basically this sort of mysterious, ai, vocaloid/miku internet personality that is very Carefully and elaborately Coded and ENCRYPTED to keep her identity Safe.
so her turning off her voice mod and speaking to stan, not as a fictional, larger than life computer-generated celebrity, but as a human being...is massive.
it's also very...Comforting to ravenstan.
who has not been himself...for a very long time. and it's not smart, it's not a good idea, but he decides to trust her and in turn,
in his real voice, says,
"stan. my name...is Stan.
It's Nice To Meet You, Wendy."
he shakes her hand and she shakes his.
she says, "it's nice to meet you too, stan." :)
and it feels...Nice. it should feel wrong, what they're doing, but it feels right, it feels fucking amazing to stop Preforming. she knows his name, she's seen his face...but realizes he still has not seen Hers and running on adrenaline, bolstered by a rare surge of bravery, chinks at her armor, or mask rather, and makes a motion.
literally.
bc he reaches up towards her face and goes, "oof. it's nice to hear your human voice; the dystopian robot voice was lowkey espantoso."
he laughs, it's genuine and super ugly, god bless him. so you Know he's being really real when he asks "but...if it's all the same to you. if were going to speak freely; i'd like to...see Who i am speaking to.
so can i, please, uh...see your Face? your whole face.
your...Real face."
and oof. this...is a little nerve-wracking for wendalends.
she's neeeever taken the mask off. ever. Ever. EVER.
For A-n-y-o-n-e.
but...she might never have the chance again and it is...really stuffy under there. so she Agrees and lets stan remove her face apparatus.
ravenstan does say "Wowza." HDLKSHDSl amazing.
he's also my boyfail king and says something very fucking stupid like
"sorry, you're REALLY Pretty. i was worried might look like deadpool under there." she smiles, it's beautiful. no one has seen her real smile before as call girl and thanks him. she goes on to apologize and is like
"thank you, stan. you're really sweet and i...am sorry i said 'ew'. it's not because you're ugly, you're kind of...Cute for a guy, actually? you have really nice bone structure and very kind eyes. it's just, when i said you weren't my type i meant Boys. in...general."
her voice shakes a little, she's never admitted this out loud before, not even to her girlfriend. but she trusts stan with the nice bone structure and dumb ugly laugh and very kind eyes, so she says
"i'm a...Lesbian.
i'm also Seeing Someone at the moment.
It's Complicated."
and stan is like, skhdlsd way too excited to talk about kyle, and is like
"okay, whew! i'm ALSO seeing someone! or well..." then remembers and is like oooof "well...i Was...seeing someone i guess. it's..."
my man is Depressed and is trying to change the subject because he realizes he actually can't talk about kyle because not only is cartman going to kill him if he does...he is also gonna freakin K!ll Himself because he's actually so sad that kyle currently hates his GUTS.
so he sighs, echoing her and admits "It's...Complicated." :/
he wants to hear something nice though, something real...and nice. because he is a romantico king. who believes more than anything...
in Love.
so he asks her what her girlfriend's name is. <3 :')
annnd i think she is About to say bebe's name...but realizes if she does, it will completely blow her cover.
like her ACTUAL Cover.
because stan knowing her first name and her what she looks like under the mask is one thing...but the second she says bebe's name, it's going to reveal that she is kyle's bebe's wen/wendyl which...is
Meeeeessy.
but she reasons ( as an intelligent, rational queen ) that regardless of how messy things get, her and stan are in this mess together and that the best time to make a mess...is when you are Coming Clean.
still...this is...very sensitive information. she’s not sure how he's gonna take it and needs some sort of collateral.
so she states her terms.
and call girl, who stan now knows is wendy, but not bebe's current girlfriend ( yet ) says "okay. i am going to tell you something, but in order to do it. i have to tell you...Everything. in exchange, i need YOU to tell me Everything. i am going to give you One Chance to do so willingly. if not...i do not care how untraceable you Think you are, i am very familiar with the dark web and i will find out everything i Need to know about you. and do with that information...What. I. Please.
...so /please./ promise me you won't tell anyone about what i am about to tell you...and then, tell me...stan...Something Real."
stan agrees and wendy goes into everything. comes out as trans to him and explains her origin story. ( i started to write everything in this ask but it got too long, i'll tell you all about call girl/wendy in another ask i have a couple in the box i can use, haha. ) she tells him pretty much everything ( it's a big therapy session in there ) up until this point, gaydhd ravenstan...manages to understand
Everything.
and when she finishes, true to the deal, she gently volleys the ball into his court, ( they are friends now, aw <3 ) and softly goes:
"okay...Your Turn."
and so ravenstan...who is Deeply Inspired by wendy...Wowza. he seriously thinks she is so fucking cool and ALSO A TRANS ICON??? HELLO? he feels v seen and heard and safe, so uh...jesus christ, he grabs wendy's hands, takes a veeeeeery deep breath and goes,
"so, i...
— Am DEAD."
LKHDSHSDLKDS HEEELP KSHLKDS
annnnnnd proceeds to tell her everything.
and i do mean...Everything.
they talk for the rest of the night basically, having this heart to heart, at the same time that, unbeknownst to ravenstan, jerseykyle and ike are also having a heart to heart....wendy and stan are platonic besties, they agree to keep each other's secrets as t4t legends stuck in cartman's fucked up marionette hell together, they agree to keep their crazy charade up while they try and find a way out/back to bebe and kyle, take some v convincing publicity pictures together ( i do think jk and bebe see them and want to die So Bad, it's not funny...bebe/jk or wendy/rs...choose your doomed broship. Fml. )
and that's...
Your Crazy Uncle Nina RM Lore Drop For The Night!
i hope you enjoyed it, haha. <3 please feel free to drop me a line in the ole ask box about it and ofc, as always, to ask me anything you would like! if you're still with me...after all this time. thank you so much for supporting me and enjoying my content.
it means...Everything to me.
and in writing something fake...
thank you all:
for being my Something Real. <3 c':
-uncle nina, callgirl/raven superfan
#rm spoilers#i am sorry this was so fucking nuts#idk why i decided to put aside like four hours to write this#but here we are help#i hope it was thrilling#ALSO IM SORRY POP PRINCESS ACTUALLY FUCKS SO HARD I DONT EVEN CARE THAT SONG SLAPS#also if rs dropped the punkrock version of it and held my hand ion stage i would end it all everyone was jealous#especially jerseykyle who was trying to be aloof#okay jerseykyle being silent...its so scary yall its actually frightening and YOU KNOW RS IS ACTING A DAMN FOOL#trying to get him to look at him its sooo...smh like he is acting the hell up like pick me choose me KHDLKSHLD#and surprisingly he is not choosing violence which is actually More violent and three thousand times scarier AAAA :(#BUT RAVENSTAN AND CALL GIRL I FUCKING LOVE THEM THEY ARE BEST FRIENDS I MEAN IT THEY ARE BESTIES#THEY ARE AN UNLIKELY ALLIANCE AGAINST CARTMAN AND IN GAY FUCKED UP CELEBRITY HELL TOGETHER#idk they are very sweet to me and both understand what the other one is going through they are platonic soul mates#they are rockstar popstar jersey and bebe tbh#its such a mess#sorry this is so poorly written i really did my best#and again at this point i am genuinely not sure who is still hanging in there for my weird content but if you want it#here you go baby#feel free to yell at me in the inbox if u would like#it thrills me very much#me at the top of my lungs at two am: pOP PRINCESS HOOOLD MY HAAAAND POP PRINCESS IM A FAAAAAN#POP PRINCESS I NEEED YOU NOW FREAK ME OUT TURN UPSIDE DOOOWOOOoOWOOWn skdhlkshdls#please someone tell me you see the vision i am so passionate about this i am sorry this is so real to me#jk and bebe rage bait making out is peak content#Happy Pride Month 🌈😩
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latenightdaydreams · 5 months ago
Text
Viking!König x Reader Part 3 (fem)
MDNI🔞
Part 1, Part 2
Master List
>cw: fem/afab, lactation kink, pregnancy, depression, fingering
1.7k word count
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As you sit in a grand wooden chair with beautiful hand carvings of a wolf and runes, you gaze out at the large fire before you. Watching the embers rise from the ashes, you zone out and go into your own mind. Around you there are loud cheers of celebration. It’s night two of the celebration to welcome their beloved leader’s new bride. 
You sit wearing a yellow dress that hugs your heavy breasts so perfectly for König’s lustful gaze. Other men look, but don’t dare comment on how stunning you are. König stands drinking as he gazes back at you. The look on your face is clear that you aren’t in the mood to be here. He excuses himself and walks to you, sitting in the chair matching yours beside you.
“Liebling, are you not having fun?” His voice is gentle as he rubs your back comfortingly.
Your attention turns to König. His blue eyes lock with yours, giving you the sensation of butterflies in your stomach. “I am just feeling tired.” Not a complete lie, you are tired still from the stress of everything that’s happened recently.
König stands and holds his hand out for you to hold. “Let us go back to our home.”
You look at his hand extended to you with hesitation. “I don’t want to ruin your celebration.”
“It’s our celebration. Besides, as your husband, your happiness is my new priority.” He gives you a genuine, gentle smile. “Come on.”
You slip your hand in his and stand. König announces your departure, but encourages everyone to continue the joyful festivities. His eyes glued to you the whole walk back to your shared home. Once inside, he brings you to the bed so you can sit. He gets on his knees before you and pulls each shoe off for you.
“Let’s get you comfortable.” König almost whispers to you as he removes your accessories from your body and assists you in removing your dress. His eyes gloss over your body as you sit on the bed naked. He can feel his cock get erect as his eyes fall on your full breasts.
“Would you like for me to relax you?” His hands caress your legs as he asks to drink from your breasts.
“No.” Your voice is small. You feel tired and emotionally drained.
König simply nods and caresses the side of your face. “Let’s get you to bed.” He walks over to the other side of the bed, undressing as he does. Once on the bed, he crawls behind you, delicately grabbing you and bringing you to him. Your naked bodies pressed together under the thick blanket, covering you both. You curl yourself into a small ball, enjoying the feeling of security he gives you.
“I love you, y/n. I hope to dream of you tonight.” He whispers, kissing your forehead gently as his eyes close. His fingertips roam over your soft skin. Your tender warmth being everything he craves.
You don’t say it back, he doesn’t expect you to. He understands that you’re still in a state of adjusting to your new life. König is someone new to get to know, but he believes that you will grow to love him. The way you react to his touch and melt into him as if you’ve known him from a past life. He knew from the moment your eyes met that this is how it’s supposed to be.
König falls asleep quickly, feeling secure with you in his arms. You on the other hand, don’t. In the distance you can still hear the sounds of the loud celebration. All you can think of is how you’ve been thrust into this new life without warning. What is Callum doing? How are the children?
You shift uncomfortably, unable to sleep. Your breasts are full and the noises around you aren’t helping soothe you. Gently, you nudge König. The giant man is a heavy sleeper so it takes a few shakes before one of his blue eyes open half way. He looks down at you, a small smile creeping across his lips as his vision adjusts on you.
“What is it, Liebling?”
“I- I can’t sleep.”
König props himself up on one elbow, his hair falling in front of his face slightly. “What can I do to help you?” He reaches out and caresses your face while you gaze into his eyes. There is a white milky bead dripping from your nipple, giving him the idea what you might need.
Without a word spoken, König lowers himself to bed so that his face lines up with your breasts. “I’ve got you.” He whispers, wrapping his arms around your waist to keep you close to him. His mouth fishes for your leaking nipple, wrapping his lips around and suckling. Your other breast begins to let down, causing milk to drip onto König’s face, but he doesn’t mind. He switches between both nipples to ensure your comfort. His eyes close as his body relaxes.
A small sigh leaves your lips, his arms wrapped around your body along with how he suckles leaves you in a state of deep longing. You slowly comb your fingers through his golden locks, clueing König into the fact you want him. He lets his hand glide along your back down to your ass, squeezing lightly before moving his hand around your hip.
König combs his fingers through your soft hairs until he touches the lips between your legs. Before he even asks you if this is what you want, you spread your legs slightly to allow him entry. His fingers slide down your slick folds until his fingers slip into you.
“König.” His name drips from your lips so gently. You lightly pull on his hair, causing a low groan to rumble from his throat.
“Mhm.” He responds as his fingers lazily move in and out of you while his thumb makes small steady circles on your clit. He doesn’t want to overwhelm you, he’s aware of how sensitive you get, but he does want to make you orgasm so your body can relax for a good sleep.
You hate to admit that in moments like these, your past life seems far from you. You’ve never had someone tend to your every need. No matter how insignificant it may seem, König makes sure you’re comfortable and aware of the love he holds for you. Touching your body is never a chore, rather a privilege.
König feels your walls tighten around his fingers as your sweet arousal begins to drip down his finger. “That’s it, y/n. You’re so divine.” He mumbles with your full breasts still consuming his face. Your sticky milk glazes his pale skin.
Your moans grow steadily, König’s cock twitching as he leads you through your orgasm. His hips thrust forward to rub himself against the soft fat on your thigh, giving him the friction he craves. He pulls back and looks at your face once he feels your body relax and your moans quiet down.
Withdrawing his hand from between your legs, he scoots up to kiss your lush lips. “Is that all you need, Liebling?” His voice is soft laced with the lust he has for you.
“No, I want more of you.” You admit bashfully. König was going to give you every bit of himself.
This small moment in time created a bond within you to König. You started to wake up feeling a little less heavy, able to enjoy the people around you. Thyra took the lead in showing you the ways of a Viking woman and helping you maintain yourself a woman of status. Anywhere König went, you were right under his arm. Your love making could be heard at all hours of the day from the people of the village.
Naturally, all of the sex results in a missed flow cycle. You’ve missed them before so you know what it means. Knowing that König is busy training, you rush to Thyra’s home. Your hands bang on the wooden door of her home. She opens the door with a worried look, Hilda rushing to your side along with her.
“Hva er galt?” The two women ask, their voices overlapping.
With the language barrier, you’ve both been talking with body language. You point to your stomach and hold it. “Baby” you say with tears falling down your eyes. They understood instantly. Thyra went to comfort you as Hilda began to speak little blessing to you and the possible life within.
“Gå og hent ham.” Thyra speaks softly to Hilda as she continues to rock you. She’s aware of the children you left behind. Haven’t lost her only son in battle, she can relate to the feeling of loss that consumes you.
A few moments later König comes into her home. His hair up in a bun while his shirtless body sports new bruises and scrapes. With heavy breaths he rushes to you and scopes you into his large arms.
“Are you pregnant, Meine Liebling?”
“I think so.” Your voice shakes as you nuzzle your head into him and take deep breaths.
“This is good news, y/n.” He sits down with you on his lap, turning your face up to meet his gaze. “It will get easier, I promise.” His lips press against yours, rocking you back and forth to comfort you.
König had at least hoped things would get easier for you. They didn’t. As he had the pleasure to watch your soft body fill out with his child forming within you, he also had the misfortune of having to see your pain. A mother’s sadness, enough to bring a man like König to his knees.
As you sit in a grassy field, König sits beside you, looking at your beautiful face glowing but plagued with a permanent frown. “Do you worry you may not love our child?” He asks in a quiet voice, scared of your answer.
“I already do.” Your voice hoarse from all of your sobbing. “I just can’t help but to feel lost without my other children.”
König studies your face with, taking in how much this distance is taking a toll on you. You’re the love of his life. He never saw himself as a man that would be open to the idea of raising another man’s children, but for you he would give everything to see you smile again.
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merakiui · 2 months ago
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is stepbrother skully worth anything..... ( ՞ ܸ. .ܸ՞ )
weird, misunderstood stepbrother who has been so fixated on horror and his appreciation for the nightmare before christmas that he completely neglects his (nonexistent) love life, instead choosing to fantasize about the gothic romances from the literature he's read. but now he's living under the same roof as you, his stepsister, and it's entirely new territory.
he doesn't have many friends (none at all, for that matter), so now he finally has someone he can ramble to about his interests in jack skellington and everything terrifying!!! he's so excited. you genuinely listen to him, sharing the same love for these things, and skully's so happy because for the first time someone actually understands him. :O
he has no concept of personal space, so be prepared when he looms over you with curiosity. what's this? the perfume bottle you always carry with you? aaah!!!! so that's why you smell so good! and what's this? lip gloss? is that why your lips always look so soft and shiny and kissable? >w< he's just so fascinated with you and all of the little things you carry in your bag. and when he finds lingerie mixed in with the laundry and he picks it out and admires it, picturing these soft frills adorning your body... omg what a pretty vision!!!! and maybe you'd look up at him with that cute face of yours when you lay in his bed,,, what if you let him peel these dainty ribbons off of you?!?! omg omg omg that's way too erotic!!!! he thinks, covering his face and blushing fiercely. isn't he supposed to court you properly and have a chaste romance before any of the naughty stuff!?!?!? uuuwaaa how embarrassing........
sometimes you'll catch him poking around in your room. he's a horrible liar, always stumbling over his words, avoiding eye contact, fiddling with his hands... no, he wasn't peeking in your closet and he wasn't looking through your drawers!!! >_< he's just,,, admiring the interior design???? OTL the ruby-red blush on his face says otherwise, as does his sweaty appearance. ;;; he's just so flustered. maybe he found a sex toy and it baffles him that you can fit all of that inside you. >_< waaaa does that mean you might be able to fit him??? (hopeful question) AAAAA OTL what is he thinking!!!!!
not once does it occur to him that his interest in you is wrong. you're his first crush. he thinks this is all par for the course.
399 notes · View notes
jayflrt · 1 year ago
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golden boy
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❝ c’mon, this is exactly like the bahamas if you close your eyes. ❞
PAIRING ▸ lee heeseung x fem!reader
GENRES ▸ fluff, crack, best friends to lovers, summer romance au, rich kid au
WARNINGS ▸ profanity, underage drinking, heeseung is the biggest simp ever, and he calls you princess, mc has a stepdad, she is also a little spoiled in the beginning, tooth rotting fluff (like might be the fluffiest thing i’ve written), mutual pining ofc because this is a jayflrt fic, friends being insufferable (mainly 02z)
SUMMARY ▸ in the summer between high school and college, lee heeseung is determined to make you fall in love with the city of los angeles after your vacation plans in the bahamas fall through. somewhere between the lines, though, you end up falling for your childhood best friend.
WORD COUNT ▸ 16,375 words
PLAYLIST ▸ youth by troye sivan • tongue tied by grouplove • ribs by lorde • sanctuary by joji • cruel summer by taylor swift • stars by duncan laurence
AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ i have been waiting AGES to share this one so i hope u guys like it !! ♡ also pls play stars by duncan laurence during the observatory scene if you’d like :’)
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IT WAS THE FIRST DAY OF SUMMER VACATION WHEN YOU RECEIVED THE GOD-AWFUL NEWS.
“Your father and I are finally gonna have our honeymoon this summer!” your mother exclaimed, grinning excitedly as if she was expecting you to reciprocate the same energy.
Okay, maybe it wasn’t god-awful, but this was the one summer where you didn’t have to shoulder the responsibilities of being a student. Having recently graduated from high school, you were basking in the glow of finally becoming an adult and an incoming college freshman. You were finally free from AP exams, college applications, and the pressure of balancing academics and a social life. So, given all that, you were rather upset that your parents were leaving you behind before you had to fall into the routine of being a student all over again.
You didn’t mind having this talk. In fact, you were glad your mother was telling you in advance instead of just jetting away to another country and leaving a note behind. However, you didn’t understand why she had to have this conversation in front of your best friend, Lee Heeseung.
It probably didn’t help that you two had been joined at the hip since you were wearing diapers, but your families had gotten far too comfortable with each other. Just last week, Heeseung’s mom was asking you if you both had finally “tied the knot,” to which you replied by explaining that you had just graduated high school.
You were happy for your mother and stepfather, really. Your mother had experienced her fair share of bad relationships after your father left, so you were glad that she finally met someone so kind and genuine. You weren’t ever one to judge the men your mother brought home, but your stepfather always got brownie points for playing Mario Kart with you whenever he came over. Not to mention, he bought you the Nintendo Switch to play it on. He seemed to be the only man who didn’t feel insecure about your mother’s success and lavish lifestyle, so you only had good things to say about him.
While you were genuinely glad with the outcome of your parents’ relationship, that unbecoming, spoiled side of you was slipping through the cracks. Even your brain was shouting at you for complaining about having to stay in Bel Air for the summer. Yet, you were just far too frustrated with the bleak vision of your own summer to care about your parent’s honeymoon. In two weeks, you should have been vacationing in the Bahamas with a piña colada in your hand, not waiting for your parents to come back from Rome.
“That sounds so fun,” you chirped with fake enthusiasm, although you supposed it was easily detected due to your gritted teeth, “and that’s not gonna interfere with our trip to the Bahamas, right?” When she didn’t respond, you asked again, “Right, Mom?”
Your mother wore an uneasy look on her face at the sight of your displeasure, so Heeseung cut in quickly, “I think you should probably forget about the Bahamas this year, Y/N.”
“Heeseung!” you whined, sending him a sharp glare. He did not just tell you to forget about the Bahamas. “You’re supposed to be on my side!”
“Not around your mom, dude,” he muttered.
“He’s right, Y/N.” Your mother smiled as she placed her hands on your shoulders. “I mean, it would be good for you to stay here with all of your friends for once; I don’t think you’ve ever not left the country for the summer.” When you sulked, your mother tried to encourage you by gently squeezing your shoulders. “Heeseung and your other friends are here, and you have a car now! Yeji’s family moved to Irvine now, didn’t they? You can drive down to see her.”
You nodded, a little more encouraged. You and Hwang Yeji had been close ever since you met at Choi Jisu’s birthday party in middle school. When Yeji’s parents decided to move to Irvine, finding that housing was much more expensive in Los Angeles County, you were absolutely crushed. Plus, it wasn’t like Orange County was any less expensive, so you felt even more bitter about their sudden move. It wasn’t like you could drive and see Yeji whenever you wanted, either; the one hour drive felt like three with all the Los Angeles traffic.
You hung your head, dejected. “I guess so.” You turned your head to the side, noticing the snicker that Heeseung was holding back. After shooting him a dirty look, you looked back at your mother. “When are you leaving?”
“This weekend,” she responded, eyes fixed on her phone screen now. “I have to sort out my PTO with my boss today, though.” She kissed the top of your head and started heading for the door, heels clicking against the linoleum flooring with each step. “I’ll see you later tonight, Y/N! And make sure Heeseung actually goes home tonight!”
You shot a glance at your friend, who didn’t seem to have a care in the world in reaction to your mother’s words.
Heeseung tended to be scared of everything—everything except actually scary things, like biblically accurate angels or the wrath of his mother.
You gave your best friend a condescending half-grin, which he returned sheepishly. As of late, Heeseung had become notorious for staying out late with Jay Park, Jake Sim, and Park Sunghoon. (Yang Jungwon often joined them, but he was adamant about going home before midnight. Something about not wanting to miss out on his beauty sleep.) Everyone thought this was the beginning of Heeseung’s teenage rebellion (which was rather delayed), but then you discovered that all they did was play games in an internet café and occasionally use their fake IDs to get into VIP lounges at clubs.
When you heard the door shut, you circled around the couch to sit next to Heeseung.
“This sucks,” you said flatly. “Summer means an ungodly rise in temperature—hot enough to melt the skin off my bones, and I’d rather have that happen while I’m sunbathing in the Bahamas!”
“Do you realize how spoiled you sound right now?” Heeseung snorted, looking up from his phone where he was playing Cookie Run from the umpteenth time. You swore he was addicted to the game despite the numerous times he told you he was just playing it as a joke. Your best friend continued, “You should be happy for your mom instead of complaining about your summer being ruined.”
You sank back in your seat. You hated to admit it, but Heeseung was right; you were being uptight about this whole situation. You just couldn’t help but feel disappointed about the one thing you were looking forward to all year long.
Heeseung leaned closer so that you both were shoulder-to-shoulder, and he nudged you. You looked over and were met with his dazzling grin. Frankly, you were honored that you were graced with his attention in the middle of his Cookie Run gaming session.
“You can spend the summer with me instead,” he offered.
You snorted. “That was gonna happen, anyway. You spend all your free time at my place.”
“Why wouldn’t I?” Heeseung asked, brows knitting into a frown.
He looked at you so intensely that your breath caught in your throat for a moment. The proximity coupled with the shift in tone made you feel self-conscious, and you were scared that Heeseung was going to let some unspoken feeling slip.
However, his face broke into a mischievous grin. “You guys have a jacuzzi.”
You pressed your lips into a thin line and shoved him harder. This time, Heeseung was laughing as he fell against one of the cushions on his side. You grabbed one of the throw pillows and started pummeling him with it.
“You have your own jacuzzi, too, dumbass,” you retorted. “You’d know if you actually stayed at your own house for once! Also, you’ve lost your pool privileges here after you poured bubble bath in ours.”
“Come on. It wasn’t that bad.”
“You clogged our jets and we had to pay someone to get rid of the bubbles, Heeseung.”
“Jake was the one who poured the bubble bath in!”
“And who was the one who gave him the idea?”
Heeseung grimaced, and you were seconds away from reminding him how you took the fall for him when your parents asked what happened to the hot tub. Before you could, though, he spoke up.
“I was being serious, though,” he started, “do you wanna have a fun summer with me, or do you wanna stay bitter and do nothing?”
Something about Heeseung’s condescending tone was pissing you off. You stared at him before delivering one last blow with the throw pillow.
“Ow! What was that for?!” he exclaimed, rubbing his arm. You rolled your eyes at his dramatics; you didn’t even hit him that hard.
“I’ll see you later,” you told him, turning on your heel to head upstairs without seeing your friend out. “I have plans with Yizhuo now.”
You weren’t exactly sure how you became friends with Ning Yizhuo, but throughout high school, everyone knew the two of you came in a package deal. When you were in third period AP World History, everyone knew that Yizhuo would switch out of her second period section to be in your class; when you didn’t show up to calculus, it was no surprise that it was because you were ditching with Yizhuo; when Zhong Chenle asked Yizhuo out, he realized that commitment came with becoming your friend as well.
At first, you assumed that it was because your mothers were close, but that didn’t explain why you spent countless nights at her place and picked her up for school every single morning. Heeseung even once admitted that he was jealous of your friendship with her. He was drunk when he mentioned that, of course. He would never admit to that while he was sober.
When she got into a school on the west coast and you got into a school on the east coast, though, you thought your life was over. (When you figured out your meet-up plans were somewhat manageable, you felt a little better.)
On the bright side, you were stoked to attend Yale with your partner-in-crime, Heeseung.
“Wait! Let me drive you,” said partner-in-crime offered.
You turned to face him, wide-eyed. “It’s like a thirty minute drive, Heeseung. I’m going to her country club.”
Despite your protests, you knew that Heeseung would be more than willing to drive all the way over there. Hell, you could tell him you wanted to go to Las Vegas right now, and he’d somehow manage to arrange a trip for you two. You had never met anyone as spontaneous as him.
Now, though, you were trying to get away from him because you were a little bitter about his comment. On the other hand, you really didn’t want to drive alone, so you kept his proposition on the table.
“Oh, her country club? The one up north, right?” he inquired. “Can I bring Jake, too? We’ll just hang out at the mall while you do your thing.”
You mulled it over—not for long, though, because you found yourself caving easily. “Fine.”
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You forgot that Heeseung bringing Jake meant that Jay and Sunghoon were coming along for the ride, too.
The three of them were squeezed in the back of Heeseung’s Tesla, with Jay incessantly complaining about how he had to take the middle seat. He even went as far as to compare heights, and Sunghoon used his one centimeter on Jay to his advantage. Jake remained silent for once.
You ran your finger along the smooth leather of your seat and snorted.
“Are you making fun of my car?” Heeseung asked with a chuckle.
“No, I’m making fun of how you dropped extra money for white seats.”
“And for the seven-seater.”
“What?!” Jay exclaimed, swiveling in his seat to look behind him. “And you still squeezed me in the middle seat?”
“Not my fault you didn’t look behind you, dude.”
Sunghoon and Jake proceeded to laugh at their friend, and you were about to do the same until you realized you had looked to see if Heeseung was laughing along with you. To your delight, he was. That, and the wind was blowing in his hair so perfectly. The golden sun shone across his face in a way that made his eyes crinkle up and his smile grow. You would always scold him for not having sunglasses on him, but, this time, you were a little distracted by how he glowed.
Heeseung then turned to you, one hand on the steering wheel and the other on his thigh. “What’s up?”
“N-nothing at all.” You coughed, tearing your gaze away to look ahead at the freeway. “Are we almost there?”
You just then registered how the backseat had gotten awfully silent, and when you turned to check on The Three Idiots (you deemed this title upon them back in high school, and it stuck), they all had Cheshire grins spread across their faces. It was a little scary, honestly. Their antics were nightmarish on their own, but what their eyes suggested was something that would haunt you. You fought down the heat creeping up your cheeks in an effort to appear indifferent, and you turned back to look at the GPS.
Ten minutes. You had to deal with them for ten more minutes. That was 600 seconds. Maybe you could tune out the testosterone if you counted down your arrival time.
To your relief, though, ten minutes passed by much faster because the four boys got into a heated argument over the superior boba shop in the Bay Area. You had to interject by reminding them that none of them were even from the Bay Area. Heeseung wound up going on a tangent about how he and Choi Yeonjun went on a day trip last weekend, which you would have remembered “if you were a better friend.”
You did remember, actually. Heeseung was texting you the entire time about Yeonjun forcing him to choose between him or a PS5. You presumed that Heeseung chose the PS5 because Yeonjun posted a black screen on his Snapchat story with the caption “dhmu” followed by a wilting rose and broken heart emoji.
(They wound up gaming all night afterward, anyway.)
The Three Idiots sensed tension from the back seat, so they started a new debate: the superior boba shop in Los Angeles.
You couldn’t believe that this was the depth of their conversations.
When you finally arrived at Yizhuo’s country club, you were being nagged by Sunghoon to get out of the car. He was eager to go to the mall and try out a new sushi place that everyone had been raving about. For someone who seemed to lack any seriousness, Sunghoon was extremely diligent about his frequent Yelp reviews; he even got promoted to the Yelp Elite Squad.
“Alright, alright, I’m going!” you complained, shooting Heeseung a withering look—a please save me from your friends, which he grinned at. “Bye, then.”
“Have fun, princess,” Heeseung called as you were closing the door, and you were grateful your back was turned so that he couldn’t see the look on your face.
(“Princess?” Jay questioned. “Did you just call her princess?”
“It’s an inside joke!” Heeseung rebuked.
“And were you just checking her out?” came Jake’s muffled voice from inside the car, and a bark of laughter followed immediately after from Sunghoon and Jay.)
You shook your head when Heeseung sped off as quickly as possible. You could picture it so vividly; he would be defending himself to his dying breath, cheeks bright red as his mouth ran. Although you found it funny, you knew that Heeseung was probably just glancing out the window to make sure you weren’t too close to the car before he drove away.
“Y/N!” Yizhuo called from the entrance. You turned to see her clad in a cotton shirt and tennis skirt, standing next to Zhong Chenle. “Did you think we were swimming or something?”
Yes, you most definitely did think you were going to be sunbathing by the poolside. With a sheer cover-up over your black one-piece, you were definitely not ready to play tennis with Yizhuo and her boyfriend. You even had your red heart-shaped sunglasses on your head.
You let out a petulant whine, taking your walk of shame over to the two. “I’m already in the racquet club, so why would I come here to play more tennis?”
Yizhuo shrugged, but the one thing you loved about her was that she was flexible with plans. “I’ll just change into my swimsuit, then. I’ve been wanting to sunbathe,” she said before handing Chenle her racquet. “Looks like doubles didn’t work out. Are you and Jisung good with playing singles?”
“I don’t mind as long as I win,” Chenle answered with a grin. “See you two later.”
He was clearly delighted because you were probably the only competition he had to worry about. You were sure Park Jisung would complain when he found out that you weren’t going to be his partner. Jisung was utterly hopeless when it came to tennis—or, rather, he was scared of anything flying in his direction.
Yizhuo grabbed her Prada leather tote bag, pulling out a white two-piece with a gold clip in the front after some digging. She excused herself to change quickly, and came back within five minutes. You were grateful she came prepared. For her, though, it was inevitable considering she drove thirty minutes most days to lounge around her country club with Chenle.
“They’re renovating the banquet room right now,” Yizhuo informed as she settled into the lounge chair next to yours. “I was going to invite you for the opening next week, but you’re gonna be in the Bahamas, as usual.”
“Yeah, about that,” you drawled, “vacation plans fell through, so I’m not going anymore.”
“What?” Yizhuo sat up, startling the server who brought over cocktails on a silver plate. “But you always go to the Bahamas!”
You gingerly took one of the cocktail glasses, mouthing your gratitude before turning your attention back to Yizhuo. “My parents wanna spend their honeymoon alone, and Heeseung thinks I’m acting spoiled.”
Yizhuo smirked against the rim of her glass. “How is it that Heeseung always manages to come up in our conversations?”
“He doesn’t!” you exclaimed. “He’s just always around, you know? Like a fruit fly.”
“Just like how Chenle’s always around?”
“Chenle’s your boyfriend; Heeseung’s just a gnat.”
“I’m telling you, Y/N, you and Heeseung are the dictionary definition of couple behavior. I swear, you two are meant for each other.”
You sighed. “Heeseung and I have been best friends since, like, forever. Our relationship is just… different from my other friendships.”
Yizhuo raised a brow, a coy smile still creeping across her face. “So how come you refer to everyone else as friendships, but with him it’s a relationship?”
“Psychoanalyze much?” You sent a mocking smile right back at her. “Can I not have a friend of the opposite gender anymore?”
“You can have one that doesn’t make heart eyes at you,” Yizhuo replied with a scoff. “I’m telling you, the guy’s head over heels.”
“Whatever.” You slipped your sunglasses down to rest on the bridge of your nose. You didn’t want to think about potential romantic feelings for your best friend that could threaten the stability of your life-long friendship. “Let’s circle back to what’s actually important: my summer.”
“Poor Heeseung.” Yizhuo tutted. “Bahamas over love.”
“Love can happen any time,” you said, “but the window of opportunity only opens once, and that golden period is the summer between high school and college. Think about it, Yizhuo! Every summer after this one is gonna be loaded with classes, internships, and work.”
“So, what’s your game plan?”
You pondered on her question. There were only so many options you had, and, clearly, going to the Bahamas was not one of them. Honestly, you hardly felt like a real Californian with the little knowledge you had about what you could even do around your area; all you could think about was the beach or Disneyland. Plus, with Yeji doing a summer program in Irvine and Yizhuo spending her days at her country club, you didn’t have much room for spontaneous activities with them.
Unless you wanted to spend every single day like you would on a regular weekend, you had to find someone who knew how to make things fun.
And, unfortunately, that narrowed it back down to Lee Heeseung.
You turned back to Yizhuo with a sheepish look on your face. “I think I have an idea.”
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“Be my summer escort service.”
“Excuse me?” Heeseung nearly choked on the tea your mother made for him. You watched as he set the cup down as delicately as possible while his eyes welled up with tears. He hit his fist against his chest a few times before calming down. “I don’t think you know what an escort service entails, but I think I know what you’re getting at.” He grinned slowly. “You’re taking me up on my offer.”
You did a lot of thinking on the car ride back to Bel Air.
A lot of thinking during the time when Sunghoon wasn’t complaining about the quality of the sushi place they went to. You were almost inspired to write a negative review yourself because of how passionate he was.
“Well, it’s inevitable that I’m gonna be seeing you almost every day, anyway,” you said, “so we might as well make the most of it, right?”
“I knew you’d turn around.” Heeseung reached over and ruffled your hair. “I’ll make sure you have the best summer of your life, Y/N.”
Lee Heeseung excelled at virtually anything. You were sure he would surpass your expectations with these impromptu summer plans, too.
You deemed the nickname “Golden Boy” upon him for this very reason, and it had everything to do with the fact that Heeseung was absolutely perfect at everything he did.
For a while, you even coined a theory that he had been created in a laboratory, specially designed to be absolutely flawless in every way imaginable. Of course Heeseung was born rich, smart, and handsome. Some people were just born lucky into the world, and, when you were younger, it was harder to accept that. Heeseung grew up with the world at his disposal; he got everything and anything he wanted, but that didn’t necessarily mean he took his privilege for granted.
You had to admit that Heeseung was a hard worker when it came down to it. Although he was definitely affluent as a fourth generation trust fund baby, Heeseung made sure his parents were never disappointed with his results.
Throughout high school, he consistently ranked first every single year, always coming right above you after the semester ended. Not to mention, he had even been scouted by several Division 1 schools to join their soccer team. He was even published at the mere age of sixteen for the research he did with a college professor. And, with a face and personality like his, any reasonable mother would’ve loved for their daughter to bring Heeseung home for dinner.
Another thing he never failed to accomplish was making you absolutely flustered.
“Well…” You turned your cheek. “I always have fun when I hang out with you, so don’t let it get to your head.”
“Too late. It’s getting to my head.”
You groaned.
“Hey, we might as well have fun,” Heeseung tried. “It’s not like any of us are vicariously living through each other’s summer romances.”
“Whoa. You said ‘each other.’”
“Yeah?”
You shot him a questioning look. “You’re implying that you have a summer romance that I’m not allowed to live vicariously through.”
“What? No!” Heeseung frowned as he tried to do the mental gymnastics to piece together your reasoning. “I said—actually, you know what, it doesn’t matter what I said. Who cares about being cuffed? Let’s just enjoy the last moments of our youth.”
“You know what, you’re right,” you agreed, getting fired up just by his words. Maybe it was the realization that time was fleeting, but you were determined to have the best summer ever now. “This summer, I’m Percy and you’re Grover. No one’s getting in the way of our side quests.”
“Why do I have to be the half-barnyard animal sidekick?” Heeseung deadpanned. “Can’t I be Annabeth?”
“No, put some respect on a satyr’s title.”
Your best friend picked his cup of tea back up when it had cooled. He blew gently on the surface before taking a careful sip, and then confidently drank more afterward. He set his cup down again and held a finger up, signaling that he wanted a chance to speak again. You were half-expecting it to be about the damn Percy Jackson lore.
“Your parents leave soon, right?” he asked instead. You nodded in response, somewhat surprised about his inquiry, so Heeseung continued, “Do they need a ride to the airport? We could have a sleepover after.”
“I think—”
“We would love a ride to the airport, Heeseung,” your mother gushed from the staircase as she was lugging suitcases down, “but you’re going straight back to your house after taking my daughter home.”
Heeseung swallowed thickly. “O-of course, ma’am. Straight home.”
You pouted a little. “You’re not staying?”
He smirked a little at your reaction, and you were a little flustered and disappointed that you managed to inflate his ego even further.
“Nah, I’ll just—” Heeseung cut himself off quickly when he noticed your mother was suddenly towering behind where he was seated on your couch. “I’ll—I’ll go straight to my house, like I said.”
“Come on, let the kids spend some time together before college,” your stepfather chimed in, following suit with a suitcase of his own. “Y/N hardly ever gets to stay in LA for the summer.”
“We’re going to the same college, Dad,” you pointed out.
“Of course,” He walked over to ruffle your hair, and Heeseung stared up at him as if your stepfather was some respected higher power, “but you never know what could happen in college. People grow apart whether you like it or not, and the life of a college student gets busy, so you two might as well enjoy this summer.”
When all you could do was stare at your stepfather in horror, he added, “I’m not saying you’re gonna stop being friends! It’s just easier to spend time together now than it is in college.”
“That’s why I’m your daughter’s escort this summer,” Heeseung spoke up.
“Escort?” your stepfather pressed. “That’s… a little concerning. Keep it PG, you two.”
“It’s not like that!” you whined. “Anyway, Dad, don’t you have to get to the airport soon?”
He checked his watch quickly and nodded at your mother. “Y/N’s right. We should get going soon, honey. I’m gonna go make sure I didn’t forget to pack anything.”
With that, your stepfather jogged upstairs with Heeseung’s curious eyes following him suspiciously. When you nudged him, trying to figure out why he was mugging your dad for no reason, he grinned a little. He gestured for you to lean closer so that he could speak quietly.
You leaned in close so that your ear was by his lips, and Heeseung whispered, “He’s totally packing your mom’s honeymoon present.”
“How do you know?”
“Classic move. My brother did the same thing for his wife.”
You pulled away, covering your mouth with a shocked look on your face. You had to keep yourself from audibly gasping since your mother was only a room away. Your face broke into a little smile. Seeing someone care for your mother so deeply made you so happy, especially with how she was the one who usually put in the most effort in her past relationships.
All your life, you wanted a relationship that was the complete opposite of your mother’s; now, though, you aspired to find someone who loved you that much.
Speak of the devil. She was walking over as you and Heeseung exchanged mischievous grins.
“What’re you two smiling about?” she asked.
“Nothing!” You smiled and fixed her hair. “Have fun on your honeymoon, Mom. I’ll make sure Heeseung doesn’t get into trouble.”
“Hey!” Heeseung interjected. “I’m not even that bad! Honest-to-god, Jake’s worse than me—just ask Jay or Sunghoon. Actually, don’t ask Sunghoon because I think he has it out for me right now.” He paused before adding, “Now that I think about it, don’t ask Jay, either. Just trust me on this one.”
You scoffed. “Nice going, Hee.”
Your mother smiled, and you could tell that it was a little sad. “We’ll take you to the Bahamas next time, okay, Y/N?” She did a quick sweep of the room before leaning in a little and whispering, “By the way, your stepfather was really happy that you started calling him ‘dad’ the other day. I think he almost cried!”
You hated to admit it out loud, but you felt inexplicably happy at those words.
“I’m ready!” your stepfather called as he came down the stairs. “Do you have everything you need? Are we ready to go?”
“Ready as ever,” your mother answered and turned to your best friend. “Are you ready, Heeseung?”
“Yep.” He got up from the couch, spinning his car keys around his fingers. “Come on, Y/N. Time to say bye-bye to mommy and—ow! Don’t hit me!”
The car ride to the airport wasn’t too long, but you and Heeseung fell into an uncomfortable silence while your parents were gushing about their vacation plans to each other. They weren’t even sitting next to each other. Your mother sat next to you in the back seat and your stepfather sat in the passenger’s seat to accompany Heeseung, but they were still going back and forth. You nearly considered asking your stepfather to switch seats with you so that you wouldn’t be caught in the crossfire of their incessant flirting.
When Heeseung pulled up to the drop-off zone, however, your parents pulled themselves together in record time. You received two kisses on your head from each parent after they got out of the car.
“Heeseung, let’s walk together for a bit,” your stepfather called. When you exchanged a shocked look with your best friend, your dad clicked his tongue with a laugh. “Just until the gates over there. I need some help carrying my bags.”
Heeseung, floundering for words, wound up not saying anything and scrambled to get out of the car to help him out. The conversation seemed to be light and easygoing, but you were craning your neck out of the car window to get a glimpse of what the hell was going on.
“Mom,” you whispered harshly, “tell me Dad isn’t telling Heeseung something weird right now. He’s still traumatized from the time he was interrogated about being my Homecoming date last year.”
Since neither you nor Heeseung had actual dates for the Homecoming dance last year, he made you a poster and asked you to be his date at your doorstep. At the time, you two were binge watching Parks and Recreation together, so he used that as inspiration for your poster: Please don’t REC my plans and say KNOPE to Homecoming. You vividly recalled being impressed by how neat the handwriting was only to be told later that Yeji helped Heeseung make it.
“I’m sure it’s nothing.” Your mother waved it off. “You should be more worried about how Mrs. Lee calls us in the middle of the night and asks where her son is. That’s gonna traumatize your friend.”
Wow. Lee Heeseung was already a pain in the ass to begin with, and only now you realized how his mother had it a thousand times harder.
“Have a safe trip, okay?” you told your mother after you helped her bring the rest of her bags to the gate. “And—don’t worry—I know when the gardener's coming by, so I’ll be home to let him in.”
She smiled fondly and kissed your forehead. “I’ll text you when I land,” she said. “Have fun, sweetheart, but not too much fun.”
“Mom!” you complained, cringing at whatever she was implying.
Heeseung and your stepfather were already at the front doors, and your best friend’s eyes lit up at the sight of you. You wondered if he needed saving from your father, and you confirmed this when you noticed him cower a little after shaking your stepfather’s hand.
“Heeseung,” your mother started, “thanks for bringing us here. I made brownies in the afternoon, so make sure Y/N gives you some before you go home.”
“Brownies?” Heeseung turned to you with a grin and thanked your mother profusely. “I hope you guys have a fun trip.”
After you all exchanged goodbyes, you and Heeseung headed back to his car. You were able to watch your mother and stepfather disappear into the crowd, a strange feeling lingering in your chest. You weren’t sure what it was, but you supposed you felt a little lonely. This was the first summer you were spending without your parents, and you weren’t sure what to expect.
As if Heeseung could read your mind, he said, “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure you have a fun summer.”
“It better be the best summer of my life.”
Heeseung laughed and opened the passenger’s side door for you. “Then let’s start now.”
“Huh? Right now?”
“Let’s get bingsu,” he said. Come to think of it, you were craving shaved ice; you had mentioned it to Heeseung last week. “You said you were hungry, right? And then we can go home and dig into those brownies your mom made.”
“I never said anything about being hungry.”
“But you’re hungry, right?”
The corner of your mouth twitched before breaking into a little smile.
“Alright, let’s go.”
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In all honesty, you didn’t expect anything special from Heeseung. That was why you had your own plans laid out for the coming week, and first on your agenda was going shopping with Yizhuo in Beverly Hills. Since your best friend was so adamant on spending the summer with you, though, you let him tag along.
“I hate you,” he muttered through gritted teeth as you handed him yet another shopping bag—Armani, this time. Heeseung was carrying at least six of them, letting them dangle off of his arms. “I said I’d show you how to have fun, not be your butler.”
“You said you would be my summer escort service.”
“Not like this!”
“Y/N, I swear,” Yizhuo started in a low voice, only loud enough to hear (although you wished you didn’t), “he’s like your boyfriend.”
You sped up to walk ahead of Heeseung, and Yizhuo matched your pace. Your poor best friend was lagging in the back, trying to keep up with the weight of your spending spree in his hands. Even though you told him virtually everything, this was a conversation that you couldn’t let him hear.
“He’s just my escort this summer!” you defended.
“His dad’s the senior vice president at Apple. You really think Lee Heeseung would just agree to be anyone’s manservant?”
“Well, I’m not anyone; I’m Y/N, and Heeseung and I have been best friends since forever, so it shouldn’t be surprising that he wants to spend time with me.”
“I’m just saying, it’s a little strange.”
“Yeah, yeah.” You waved off her concerns and pulled out your phone. “By the way, is the group hanging out tomorrow or something?”
“I kept seeing it in the groupchat, but I wasn’t sure whose house it was at,” Yizhuo replied. She turned and called, “Heeseung! Do you know whose house we’re all going to?”
“Tomorrow?” he asked.
“Yeah.”
“Mine.”
“Yours?” you chimed in. “I thought Jake said it would be at his place.”
“He backed out ‘cause his cousins are visiting this week,” he clarified, “so I offered mine. My parents are going out of town, anyway, so why not?”
You were surprised that Heeseung was willing to host. Most of the time his house was the absolute last resort because he hated cleaning up after everyone. For this reason, it was normally at Jake’s house because he was the only one who would tidy up himself without nagging everyone else (read: Jay Park).
You always went to Heeseung’s place on your own. There were never times where the entire group hung out there together, so it felt like everyone was encroaching on your space with Heeseung.
Even though it was his house, technically.
“You’re coming,” Heeseung added, pointing straight at you with narrowed eyes.
You frowned. “You can’t decide that for me!”
“You agreed to let me be your summer escort service, so it’s within my power,” he argued.
You made a frustrated sound. “Fine. It better be fun, though. I’m sacrificing my Pretty Little Liars marathon for you.”
Heeseung rolled his eyes. “We can just watch it together.”
“Lovebirds!” Yizhuo interjected. “I would’ve called Chenle if I knew I was gonna be a third wheel.” Both of you turned to her with wide eyes, watching the blonde’s lips curl up in a small smirk. “What?”
“That’s not what any of this is,” your best friend grumbled.
“Oh yeah? Then why are you blushing?”
Heeseung shook his head, completely turning his face away from you. You managed to catch the tips of his ears flaming bright red. It was rather easy to make Heeseung flustered, so this wasn’t something out of the ordinary, but, for some reason, you felt butterflies in the pit of your stomach.
He walked ahead, saying something along the lines of, “Let’s just keep shopping!”
You and Yizhuo exchanged a look before hooking arms and bursting into a fit of giggles.
Yizhuo called after him, “We’re going to Miu Miu next!”
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Slumber parties with your friend group sounded cute and tame, in theory. Add six men into the mix, and they became slightly terrifying.
“This is why we need to make plans in our group chat without the men,” Shen Xiaoting muttered to you with her eyes fixed on Heeseung’s flat screen TV. “This is not the girls night I was envisioning.”
Your friend group of eleven (excluding Yeji, who was away for the summer) was currently playing their ninth round of Mario Kart 8. You were all taking turns, though, since the game only catered to co-oping with four people. Frankly, you were starting to get tired of the game after about five rounds. You were hellbent on beating Jay, who was talking smack about how terrible you were at gaming, but it turned out that he was no better. You ended up beating him in the first race itself, and now you were just waiting for them to wrap it up.
“Fuck,” Jake hissed once Choi Beomgyu used his blue shell on him. Jake had been consistently winning every game he played despite everyone trying to get him in last place; in the last round, Kim Minjeong made a valiant effort to use most of her Crazy 8 items on him.
You were surprised that Jake showed up in the first place. Everyone suspected that he would be stuck at home because of his cousins visiting, but he somehow managed to get his way out of it. Although he was late, he showed up at Heeseung’s door with a pillow and a handle of cheap vodka. It probably tasted rancid, but there was no room for anyone to complain.
“Get the item box, get the item box!” Chenle yelled. “But you’re kind of screwed if you don’t get a super horn or a super star.”
“So, when are we wrapping up Mario Kart?” Nakamura Kazuha asked, sighing in frustration after being hit with a shell for the umpteeth time.
“Uh, after this game,” Heeseung replied.
“And how many more rounds is that?”
“Three.”
“Jesus Christ.”
The only girl in your group who enjoyed gaming was Yizhuo, but even she was tired of the seemingly endless rounds. Since the boys were going along with the girls’ plans later on, though, you had to be patient. Appease them with Mario Kart, and then the rest of the night was yours.
Somehow, you managed to grit your teeth and sit through the next three rounds (won by Jake, Yizhuo, and Beomgyu, respectively). Afterward, Jake got up to grab the case of Mike’s Harder on the kitchen island. He proceeded to open it up and hand each person a can.
Xiaoting cracked open her can and asked, “How’d you even buy these? Didn’t your dad confiscate your fake or something?”
Around a few months ago, Jake’s dad had caught him wasted at one of their charity galas. Apparently, the Sims didn’t care too much about their son drinking, but they were furious about Jake acting disorderly in front of their guests. Naturally, Jake was grounded for a month and got all four of his fake IDs confiscated. He deeply missed the one from Connecticut where his name was printed as Nathan Fielder, even though Jake looked nothing like Nathan Fielder.
“I got Vernon to buy them for me,” Jake said, “and please don’t remind me about the fakes. It still wounds me to this day.”
You remembered you used to have a little crush on Vernon Chwe, who was a senior when you were a freshman. When he graduated, you almost cried actual tears, but you stayed strong when you went to congratulate him after the ceremony. You figured he would have been a little freaked out if you started breaking down out of nowhere.
Jay, who was inspecting the handle of SKYY Vodka, let out a scoff. “Vernon? Then you could’ve at least asked for good vodka.”
“We can just make mixed drinks,” you spoke up, scrunching up your nose at the memory of blacking out because of alcohol during your prom afterparties. “Plus, it’s not like we’re actually trying to get drunk tonight.”
“Yeah.” Heeseung stood up and rested his arm on your shoulder. “Y/N and I can make the drinks. The rest of you can help put snacks out. Someone can put a movie on, too.”
Since everyone was impressed with Heeseung taking the lead for once, the plan was set into motion. While Kazuha and Sunghoon bickered over which movie to play, the rest of your friends brought out different snacks for the movie. Arguably, you and Heeseung had the hardest job, but you didn’t need any extra hands for drinks. By the time it took you two to finish eleven mixed drinks, they probably would have settled on a movie.
You looked back to see Heeseung eyeballing a shot into a glass cup, and then he proceeded to down its contents. You cringed when you saw him drinking. The last time he got drunk resulted in you trying to calm him down after he went on a long rant about how he just ate sushi, and the alcohol in his system would cause the raw fish to start swimming. You had to convince him that no, vodka would not bring an already dead and sliced-up fish to life.
Heeseung’s face soured and he pushed the handle aside. “Y’know what, let’s just take something from my parents’ liquor cabinet. This shit is vile.”
“You got triple sec and decent vodka?” you asked. “We could make Lemon Drops.”
“You read my mind.”
“You weren’t even thinking about that, were you?”
“Not at all.”
While you and Heeseung were making the drinks, though, you noticed some giggles coming from the living room. You raised your head to see about five of your friends look away as fast as they could. It hit you before you had time to process what was going on; they were making fun of you and Heeseung together.
You had no clue why. Sure, Heeseung and you had some strange moments here and there. But you two were just making drinks, for crying out loud. Nothing about the situation warranted this reaction from them.
You side-eyed Heeseung to see if he noticed. Thankfully, he was just focused on pouring the right amount of vodka so he didn’t accidentally kill anyone. You, on the other hand, were fighting down the heat rising in your chest.
After a brief war between you and Yizhuo, consisting of you glaring at her and her smirking at you, you ended up setting down a glass and sighing.
“Heeseung,” you said, “go crazy with the vodka in the rest of their drinks.”
“Huh?” he asked, genuinely contemplating whether or not to do it.
“Pour as much as your heart desires,” you muttered and set down six of the Lemon Drops on a tray with a little too much force. Without sparing him a glance, you picked up the tray and went to the living room to hand everyone their glasses. While you handed Yizhuo hers, though, you whispered, “I despise you.”
She grinned. “What? Still denying you like him?”
“I don’t like—”
“You like someone?” Heeseung called from the island, completely frozen in place.
You turned and stared at him, mouth agape.
Chenle spoke up, “No, she likes y—”
You kicked Chenle’s shin with enough force to shut him up, and he grunted before he could continue his sentence. Satisfied, you turned back to Heeseung and shook your head quickly.
“They’re just being idiots,” you explained. “Hurry up with the drinks. We’re watching My Best Friend’s Wedding.” You did a double take and turned back to Yizhuo, harshly whispering, “Why the fuck are we watching My Best Friend’s Wedding?!”
Yizhuo removed Chenle’s hand from her knee and stood up to loop your arm with hers. “Come.”
“Where are we going?” you asked, but she was already dragging you away from the living room. “Is that movie supposed to be some sort of sick message?”
“Oh, good. So you’re aware.”
After making some excuse about needing your assistance to get something from her bag, Yizhuo walked with you to the foyer until she turned on you. You nearly tripped backward over one of the boys’ shoes, so you used the wall to regain your balance.
“Tell me what’s going on between you two,” she ordered.
You let out a sound of exasperation. “Yizhuo, for the last time, Heeseung and I are just friends. That’s all there is to it.”
“I’m just saying, the two of you are going to college together and all, but you have to sort out your feelings before you end up figuring them out after Heeseung finds someone else,” she said. “I mean, what’re you gonna do when Heeseung starts dating someone else? He looks decent enough to pull, so there’s no telling what’s gonna happen when he’s cut loose in Yale.”
You snorted. “He’s already cut loose. I highly doubt Yale���s gonna change anything.”
“You never know. I just don’t want you to realize your feelings too late—you know, when things get messy.”
You both were silent for a few seconds before Beomgyu called, “Y/N, Yizhuo, we’re gonna start the movie!”
“Coming!” you responded.
You chose not to respond to your best friend because you truly had no idea what to think, but it did leave seeds of doubt in your head. It almost distracted you from the fact that Heeseung grabbed your arm and pulled you to sit down next to him. This was bad; you were quickly becoming overly self-conscious of every little thing he did, and that would not bode well for your friendship.
Whatever, you told yourself. Push it down.
“Are there any more pillows?” you asked, scanning the room to see that everyone seemed to have one except you. You looked back at Heeseung and narrowed your eyes at his throw pillow. “Give me yours.”
“What? No way.”
“I wanna lay down,” you whined. He was really the only person you could act a little spoiled around. “Give me your pillow before I—”
Before you could finish, Heeseung threw his arm around you and pushed your head down so that you were laying on his lap. You were startled with the sudden gesture, but you didn’t complain. He was comfortable, after all, and you two usually watched movies like this in your house. So, you adjusted your position a little and continued watching the movie, making a mental note to scold Heeseung later for being all touchy in front of the friend group.
What you weren’t used to, though, was the way he started threaded his fingers through your hair.
You did the only thing you knew how to do in order to deflect; you showed Heeseung a TikTok of a baby otter. Your volume was all the way down, but you still bookmarked the video.
“Look,” you whispered, holding up your phone. His gentle fingers did not stop running through your hair, but at least you could hold onto his friendly hum of acknowledgement. It was the only thing that made any of this feel remotely platonic. “It’s a little guy.”
“Oh, it’s so cute,” Heeseung mused. “Kind of reminds me of you.”
Screw platonic.
He just grabbed platonic and drop kicked it to the next dimension.
That was it. You were going to put your phone away and ignore Heeseung for the rest of the movie. The rest of the movie would be watched in complete silence. In fact, you weren’t going to spare Heeseung any attention for the rest of the sleepover.
That didn’t end up happening, though. Ten minutes later, you cracked and started commenting about the movie to Heeseung. Unbeknownst to the others, you two ended up texting each other messages that threatened to make you burst into laughter. Even though you were sitting right next to each other, you felt like this made your conversation feel like a little secret, like even Heeseung wanted to keep what you two had to himself.
When the movie ended, you two were surprisingly still awake, although there were several moments where you were tempted to doze off on Heeseung’s shoulder. Minjeong, Beomgyu, and Jay were still up, and they were taking pictures of Chenle and Yizhuo to send to the group chat. You immediately separated from Heeseung, feeling a little terrified that you two would be the victims next. However, the others were so preoccupied with Chenle’s arms wrapped around his sleeping girlfriend and their foreheads pressed together.
“Should we wake them up?” Kazuha asked.
“Nah, let them sleep,” Heeseung answered and stood up. “I’m gonna brush my teeth. You guys can use the other bathrooms—just not the one in my parents’ room.”
Minjeong stretched as she let out a yawn. “Alright, I’m gonna wash up, then. I’m exhausted.”
After Minjeong, Beomgyu, and Kazuha left the room to get their bags and wash up, you stared at Heeseung. Your best friend looked confused until you pointed toward his glass.
“Chug it,” you said with mischief dancing in your eyes.
“You’re kidding. It’s bedtime.”
You mocked a pout. “You’re gonna waste the drink I made just for you?”
“Oh, come on—we made it for everyone!”
“But I definitely made this one.” You took the glass and held it out to him, which he ended up taking reluctantly. “I wanna see you finish it.”
After a wince, Heeseung tilted the cup back and downed the contents. Although his face scrunched up, he relaxed once he had finished swallowing it down.
“That was actually pretty good,” he said.
“See? When have I ever let you down?”
“Honestly? Many times.”
You elbowed him in the side. “Hey!”
“Kidding!” Heeseung held his arms up in surrender before wrapping them around your waist. Another gesture you weren’t quite used to, but you went along with it. There was something funny about Heeseung; nothing he did ever made you feel the slightest bit uncomfortable, but sometimes you weren’t sure if it was meant to be friendly. “Let’s go brush our teeth.”
“I can just use the bathroom on the second floor.”
“Huh? Just use the one in my room,” he said. “Come on.”
You hesitated before following your best friend upstairs. First of all, you were feeling overly-conscious about going into Heeseung’s room with him. Secondly, you weren’t too enthusiastic about the fact that you had to use a man’s bathroom.
To Heeseung’s credit, he kept his room and bathroom mostly spotless. Sure, there were a few sweaters piled over the head of his chair and some books left scattered across his desk, but it was definitely cleaner than Jake’s mess of a room. You remembered Yeji stepping across his piles of dirty clothes left on the floor, as if they were hazardous to her health.
As soon as you stepped into the grand bathroom, you realized that you had forgotten your toothbrush. It wasn’t the first time this happened, so you knew to just take one of the unopened toothbrushes from the drawer. However, Heeseung told you they moved some things around, so you wound up searching for the spare toothbrushes for around five minutes.
It was almost ridiculous how Heeseung needed a bathroom bigger than a living room.
You two brushed your teeth side-by-side. Heeseung occasionally cracked jokes that made you giggle and tilt your head back so that your toothpaste wouldn’t dribble down your chin. When that happened, he reached over and wiped your lower lip with his thumb, despite your complaints about how gross that was.
But, to you, it wasn’t really all that gross.
If only Heeseung knew how his actions made your cheeks burn hot under your skin.
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The next week was interesting, to say the least.
Heeseung wouldn’t let you rest for a second. You were going out with him every single day, having to see his face from sunrise to sunset. Even when it was nightfall, he would just invite himself over to your place and crash on your couch.
You pointed out that you had a perfectly tidy guest room for him to use, but he insisted that he preferred your couch. You didn’t mind him sprawled out across the cushions because you could take as many pictures of him sleeping as you pleased. You would show him your collection later when he woke up, and Heeseung would get embarrassed to the point of tickling you until you were in hysterics and gasping out that you would delete the pictures from your camera roll.
At this point, it was almost like you two were living together. Even though his parents were out of town, you felt slightly anxious about one of the adults in your parents’ circle discovering what you and Heeseung were up to. Not that it was anything scandalous.
But, you had to admit, you were having fun.
On Monday, Heeseung took you to the beach. You complained incessantly about waking up at six in the morning for cold water and sand all over your clothes, but you managed to drag yourself out of bed. Still, Heeseung had to put up with your grumbles and groans until you were energized enough to stop complaining. All it took was Heeseung feeding you a granola bar and making you coffee while you did your hair.
“C’mon,” he told you, the wind sweeping his hair to the side as the first rays of sunlight shone bright against his glowing skin, “this is exactly like the Bahamas if you close your eyes.”
“Uh-huh.”
You rolled your eyes at him, but you spent the entire day at the beach with Heeseung, anyway. You finally warmed up to going into the water with him, letting him take your hands and guide you deeper until the water was up to your waist. At one point, a particularly heavy wave pushed him closer to you until you both were chest-to-chest. You had to hold onto his bicep to keep yourself from floating away. And you swore you caught Heeseung checking you out in your bikini later on, but he turned away with pink-tinged ears immediately after.
Later, when the sun was starting to set and you retreated from the water to curl up in your towel, you sat on your large beach towel and waited for Heeseung to bring over food from the food trucks. The tide was getting higher, so you had to move yours and Heeseung’s belongings further up the sand.
Heeseung returned with two takeout boxes of tacos, taking a seat next to you with a relieved sigh. Since you two hadn’t eaten a proper lunch, you had been waiting for this meal all day. You were properly tuckered out from all the swimming and beach volleyball, so you dug in immediately.
“Good?” Heeseung asked, watching you eat with a small smile on his face. He must have been impressed that you practically inhaled your first taco in under five seconds.
“Good,” you confirmed, voice muffled.
With the back of your hand shielding your eyes, you looked off into the horizon to watch the sunlight ripple across the water’s surface.
And, yeah, maybe it was a little like the Bahamas.
Just a little.
You didn’t expect Heeseung to wake you up on Tuesday morning and drag you to an empty field. Although he told you that he had a surprise for you, you didn’t think it warranted being woken up at 5:30 a.m. without a clue of where you were going.
“Alright, close your eyes, okay? It’s a surprise,” Heeseung said, gesturing for you to cover your gaze. You found it adorable that he was fumbling so much, so you closed your eyes with a grin. “Keep them closed—hold on.”
“Heeseung, how much longer?” you whined.
“And,” he drawled, stretching out the syllable, “open!”
When you opened your eyes, towering over you was a 60-foot tall hot air balloon, its brightly-patterned nylon reflecting the bright sunlight. You boggled at its impressive size—absolutely massive. The pilot got down from the basket, walking over so that he could greet you two and provide a rundown of safety measures and procedures.
An hour later, you were in the sky, eyes sweeping over the expanse of Los Angeles. You were never that great with heights, but, somehow, you weren’t too afraid as you peered down. Heeseung stood beside you, keeping one hand on the small of your back as he pointed out different landmarks he recognized.
“I’ve never seen LA like this!” you yelled over the wind, cupping your hand around your mouth so that Heeseung could hear you.
He grinned. “Isn’t it beautiful? Makes the city actually feel peaceful for once.”
You wouldn’t dare admit it but, all the way up in the sky, thousands of feet above ground level, what made you feel like you were soaring was Heeseung’s arm slipping around your waist.
On Wednesday, Heeseung took you fishing. You absolutely hated the idea, but once you had the fishing rod in your hands, you were determined to catch the biggest fish. Heeseung ended up catching more than you, but the two fish you caught were stars in your eyes. By the end of the day, you were laughing hysterically as Heeseung’s hat got stuck in your hook and was flung into the water.
On Thursday, Heeseung took you to play mini-golf. You had gone golfing before with company executives and their kids, but this was different. You didn’t have to show off or try to be the best one there; you just had fun and laughed whenever your best friend missed the ball. You two ended the day by going to an arcade and playing almost every game inside.
By Friday morning, you were exhausted. Your limbs were aching when you woke up the next morning, but Heeseung promised to actually let you rest over the weekend. Tonight was Yizhuo’s country club’s party to celebrate the opening of their new banquet hall, so Heeseung only planned one thing for the morning so that you would have time to get ready for the party later.
Pushing your red Jacquemus sunglasses onto your head, you fixed your best friend with a puzzled stare. He was acting weird all morning, from nearly snapping at you for trying to open the trunk of his car, to staying silent when you asked where he was taking you.
For a moment, you wondered if this was the climax of a horror movie where the killer drove you to a quiet place to get rid of you. Your suspicion raised more when Heeseung parked by a marina with a hiking trail nearby.
This is where your body’s being dumped, you concluded grimly.
But, then again, this was Lee Heeseung. He cried when he was eleven because there was a spider on his backpack; he didn’t have the heart to hurt anyone, especially not you. In fact, you recalled when he nearly passed out in middle school because he thought he caused you extreme pain once. (It turned out to be your period cramps.)
“Are you gonna tell me where you’re taking me?” you asked, exasperated. “If we’re swimming, I’m gonna tell you right now that there’s no way I’m getting my hair wet before the party.”
Heeseung chuckled. “Don’t worry your pretty little head, princess. We’re just going for a spin on the lake.” He nodded his head in the direction of the yachts lined up by the shoreline. “Jog your memory?”
When your gaze landed on the gorgeous white yacht gleaming under the sun, you couldn’t help but gasp at its glorious sight. Heeseung had gotten the yacht for his birthday last year, but he never had the time to actually use it. One reason was because he didn’t trust his friends to not trash it, and the other being that he wanted his first ride on it to be special.
Your face burned. His first ride was going to be with you.
“Shut up.” You were gaping at the sight before turning to your best friend, who looked smug while he parked his car. “Shut up. You’re actually letting me go on your yacht?”
“Yeah, why not?” He tried to brush it off as something casual, but your heart was still doing cartwheels and flips. “It’s about time I went out on it.”
You two walked down to the harbor together, your hands sometimes shyly brushing and pulling away swiftly. There had been moments of thick, unspoken tension throughout the week, but you didn’t have the courage to bring it up.
Once you two reached Heeseung’s yacht, he firmly slapped his hand against the smooth, brilliant white surface. “Carver c52 Command Bridge,” he gloated. “Isn’t she beautiful?”
You snorted. “You talk about boats the same way old white men do.”
You allowed him to help you into the yacht, gripping his hand tight as you stepped onto the deck. You hadn’t questioned it before, but as soon as Heeseung let go of you, he set down the picnic basket so that he could spread out the blanket.
You helped him with the corners of the blanket. “What’s this?”
“Well, I thought we could sail out a little and then have breakfast on the deck,” he replied coolly, as if the sincerity of his words wouldn’t make your heart twist painfully in your chest. You really didn’t deserve such effort from him, and it almost made you feel guilty that you had acted so spoiled before. “I’ll go start the engine. You can just enjoy the view.”
However, you followed him to the cockpit. Heeseung raised a brow at you, but you giggled as you took a seat behind him, watching as he stood at the helm, fiddling with some controls you knew nothing about.
“You actually know how to operate this thing?” you asked.
“My dad taught me,” he explained. “I’m not licensed, though, so I don’t think this is exactly legal.”
“Not like that’s stopped you before.”
Heeseung grinned to himself. He started up the yacht’s engine by pressing a button on the dashboard. You watched his hands fly across the levers and controls before he started turning the wheel to steer out of the marina.
“You wanna head out to the deck?” he called out over his shoulder, but you just took the empty seat next to him. “Don’t you wanna sunbathe? Or you could check out the stateroom.”
“Nope,” you said, resting your chin on the palm of your hand as you watched him. “I’d rather wait for you.”
Sometimes, you’d almost catch Heeseung getting flustered. He’d always laugh and rub his nose, looking away shyly before anyone caught onto his awkwardness. The same reaction was unfolding before you right now, and you couldn’t help but smile like an idiot yourself.
You wondered if he ever felt butterflies in his stomach, too.
Once Heeseung had driven the yacht out far enough—far out enough in the water where the water was still and no one was there to disturb you two. You both headed out to the deck again. He took a seat to lay out what he packed in his picnic basket, and you removed your sundress so that you could tan a little in your bikini.
“Champagne?” he offered, holding up a bottle of Dom Pérignon that he most definitely stole from his family’s wine cellar.
You pulled out the two wine glasses in the basket and held them out for Heeseung to pour your drinks, smiling wide as he tipped the bottle. “Yes, please.”
“See, you wouldn’t be able to experience this if you were in the Bahamas right now.” He pushed his sunglasses up onto his head. “We didn’t get to hang out like this any of the past summers.”
“As if we don’t hang out almost every day.”
“But this is different!” he argued. “It’s summer. It’s not like we’re making impromptu plans to New York and flying back home a day later to study for an exam. We have all the time in the world right now.”
He was right, in a sense. You and Heeseung were always together, but you two never really got to spend long days together like this. You two got to make plans without involving anyone else in the friend group for once, and it was a lot more fun than you had expected.
“Do you think we’d be this close if we weren’t rich?” you asked after a while. Heeseung raised a brow at your question, so you clarified, “I’m serious! We wouldn’t be able to do stuff like this—flying in hot air balloons, driving yachts, going to country club parties—if we didn’t have rich parents.”
Heeseung crossed his arms behind his head and pondered, looking up at the sky with a wistful expression. He hummed before answering, “I’d like to think that we’d make it work the same way everyone else does.”
“Really?”
“Yep.”
“What if… you were rich and I wasn’t? Or vice-versa?”
“Yeah, I mean…” he trailed off for a moment, eyes cast down as if he was trying to find the words on his tongue. Then, he continued, “I think I’d be happy doing anything with you, even if all we could do together was sit at home and watch TV.”
Whatever response you had prepared at the back of your throat had died on your tongue. All you could do was look at him helplessly, wondering why his words were making your heart beat faster than when you were thousands of feet up in the sky days ago. You wondered why such gentle words from your best friend had roused a violent storm in your heart.
The wind picked up, sending your hair flying every which way. Heeseung reached out to brush a loose strand of hair away from your face, fingers lingering on your cheek as he pulled back. You went completely still, chest frozen mid-breath as he pulled away.
“You had something in your hair,” he mumbled, quickly scrambling to offer you a caprese skewer. If you looked closely enough, you would’ve noticed that his ears were bright red. “Eat quickly before the food gets stale.”
“I don’t think food normally goes stale that fast.”
“Shut up.”
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There was one thing about formal gatherings that all trust fund babies could agree on: only get drunk behind your parents’ backs.
They definitely knew what was going on, but they paid no attention as long as their children were staying safe and not embarrassing themselves. When you were much younger, you would always catch sight of the older kids sneaking away to get drunk in the bathroom, but you never understood the excitement they felt until you became a freshman in high schooler, being dragged away by Yeji to drink with the older kids.
Back then, you were doe-eyed and curious as Vernon would pour shots for you in moderation. Now, you were nearly gagging when Yizhuo handed you a shooter of Pink Whitney.
You two had locked yourselves in the bathroom with Xiaoting, Kazuha, and Minjeong as Yizhuo pulled out various shooters from her purse. It was fine for you to drink wine with the other adults, but you were all certain that the adults would frown upon you drinking hard liquor in front of the other guests. So, the five of you snuck away to get drunk secretly.
For the past fifteen minutes, as you all were downing shooter after shooter, the girls had been pressing you about something going on between you and Heeseung. After he posted you on his Instagram story, showing off his boat in the process, you were bombarded with texts that you were only able to ignore until you got to the party.
A loud knock at the door nearly scared you out of your wits, causing Minjeong to bark out a laugh at the sight of you flinching.
“Occupied!” you yelled, although the syllables slurred together strangely.
“It’s us!” came Jake’s voice. “We’re going drunk golfing.”
You frowned and stepped aside to let Yizhuo open the door for Jake. He scanned his surroundings nervously before shoving his fists into his pockets and stepping into the girls’ bathroom.
“Jake,” Xiaoting started. Although her face and neck were completely red, she focused her eyes on him to keep a serious tone. “We need you to tell us if Heeseung’s into Y/N or not.”
“Xiaoting!” you complained.
“You know what, I’d like to know, too,” Jake replied with shocking enthusiasm. He leaned against the crystal sink, folding his arms across his chest. “Screw drunk golf; this is way more fun. Y/N, do you have feelings for Heeseung? ‘Cause everyone wants to know if—”
“Jake, we didn’t bring you in here for girl talk,” Minjeong cut him off with a wave of her hand. “We brought you in here for answers.”
He let out a childish whine. “But I wanna be here for girl talk.”
“Wait, but answer his question.” Yizhuo turned to you with a wide grin on her face, handing you yet another shooter—probably to make you more honest. You seriously wished you could call Chenle over to put a leash on your friend. “Do you have feelings for Heeseung?”
Did you? You had never been so confused about where you and Heeseung stood until this week. You two had always been close—always did everything together—so why were you feeling conscious about everything now?
But, despite all of your confusion, the one thing that was clear to you was that you felt something for Lee Heeseung with every beat of your heart.
Everything he did, everything he said—you weren’t sure what it was that had you so intoxicated on his attention, but you knew you would’ve felt sick to your stomach if he did the things he did with you with any other girl.
You felt it whenever you saw him lounging around your house, digging into the brownies your mother made as if he lived there. You felt it whenever someone told a joke and the two of you made eye contact with each other first, hoping to see if the other person found it funny, too. You felt it whenever he touched your hand and called you princess, unaware that your heart was fluttering pathetically in your chest.
His smile, his laugh, his happiness—you wanted to be the cause of it all.
You caved with a defeated sigh. “Yeah, I think I might actually have feelings for him.”
A collective cheer erupted in the bathroom, the sound echoing for a few seconds after. Jake stood up just to high-five Yizhuo so hard that the impact left their palms stinging, and then Yizhuo proceeded to scold Jake for putting his full force into the high-five. You pinched the bridge of your nose with embarrassment flooding your chest.
Jake decided to abandon the boys’ plans to go drunk golfing and spent the next ten minutes discussing strategies to get you and Heeseung alone. He had integrated himself into your circle so well that he almost seemed like one of the girls. You slowly backed up into one of the stalls during their conversation, starting to feel horribly nauseous and lightheaded. You were pretty sure that Yizhuo handing you shooter after shooter was starting to have adverse effects on your body.
“How about we tell him that Y/N’s puking in the bathroom and he needs to—” Minjeong cut herself off as soon as she heard you retching by the toilet. “Oh, wow, she’s actually puking in the bathroom.” She turned to Jake after opening the door for him. “Go get Heeseung.”
“If you let me join girl talk next time,” Jake bargained.
“Are you seriously negotiating with me in this situation?”
“Yes.”
Minjeong groaned. “Okay, fine, Jake, we’ll invite you the next time we have girl talk. Now go fetch Heeseung.”
“On it!” he agreed quickly. “Don’t die, Y/N.”
“I’ll try not to” you croaked out weakly, your head hanging between your knees as you willed yourself to not barf out your guts.
“Are you okay?” Kazuha pouted as she rubbed your back in soothing circles. “This is all because you kept making her drink, Yizhuo.”
“I didn’t make her,” she retorted. “Y/N, do you need water or anything? I can ask someone in the kitchen for liquid IV, too.”
You shook your head. “No, just bring Heeseung here.”
They shared a secretive giggle, but you didn’t care. You felt way too sick to mind the girls teasing you. You even tried to distract yourself on your phone, but the bright screen just made you feel worse. You closed your eyes and leaned your head back against the wall, groaning miserably.
It had really gotten to the point where you didn’t care that you were sitting on the country club’s public bathroom floor. It was all fancy and sanitary, of course, but you would normally feel icky about this sort of scenario playing out.
You weren’t sure how long it had been, but eventually, you heard the door opening and the rest of the girls rushed to make sure it wasn’t someone outside the group. You heard them ushering Heeseung inside, explaining what had happened to you before they left the bathroom.
Heeseung knocked on your stall as a formality but let himself inside, anyway. The crooked grin on his face upon seeing you only made you turn your head away and sigh in exasperation.
You turned your head back to face him when you heard his shutter go off.
A scowl was plastered across your face. “Did you just take a picture of me?”
Heeseung snickered. “Yeah, I’m posting it on my story. Right after the one of you looking all pretty on my boat.”
“You’re supposed to be here to help me.”
“That’s why I brought soda,” he replied, holding up an entire bottle of Sprite. You were confident he snagged it from the kitchen, which you were pretty sure would result in Yizhuo scolding him for treating the country club like his house. “Anyway, why’d you drink so much? Just because I’m driving you home doesn’t mean you’re allowed to give yourself alcohol poisoning.”
You settled back into your previous position with your head between your knees. This way, Heeseung wouldn’t be able to see how stupid in love you were. There was absolutely no way you could tell him that you were mindlessly drinking while you were spilling your feelings for him.
“Where’d the girls go?” you asked instead.
“I told them to go drunk golfing while I took care of you.”
“Don’t you wanna go play, too?”
Heeseung shrugged. He took a seat on the floor next to you, not minding the indecency even though he was sober. You felt like your heart was going to explode if he kept doting on you like this.
“I can always go play another time,” he said. “Plus, I’d have more fun if you were there.”
You both went quiet for a moment. The weight of Heeseung’s words only made your heart feel heavier, and you weren’t sure how much longer you could go pretending that you only cared for him as a friend.
Then, your stomach started churning and twisting with the need to puke out your guts again, and the silence was filled with your retching. Heeseung rubbed your back sympathetically and held your hair back while you hunched over the toilet seat again.
This was definitely going down as one of your most unflattering moments.
“Want some soda?” Heeseung tried.
You shook your head.
“Drink some water, then—here,” he said, handing you a red solo cup that was filled to the brim. “I stole it from Hoon.”
Reluctantly, you lifted your head to accept the cup from him. When you took a sip, though, you just ended up hawking and spitting out the contents into the toilet.
Trying your best not to gag, you got out, “Not water—vodka.”
“Oh, my bad.” Heeseung frowned, inspecting the cup. “Why’d Hoon pour this much? No wonder he drove the golf cart into the lake.”
After throwing up basically everything in your stomach, you started to feel dizzy all over again, stumbling and wobbling all over the bathroom until Heeseung had to hold you upright. He had already gotten Yizhuo’s approval to drive you home for the night, but there was no way you were making it to his Tesla in your heels. Heeseung had you hang tight while he ran to his car to get your Dolce & Gabbana rubber slides, knowing there was no possible way for him to carry you out to the car without the adults getting suspicious.
You felt much more comfortable in your slides, so you walked out hand-in-hand with Heeseung while he held onto your heels. Although you felt bad about leaving Yizhuo’s grand opening party early, you figured that it would be more shameful for her parents to see you in this state.
You had greatly underestimated the power of alcohol.
After you had walked up to about three different cars that weren’t Heeseung’s (including Jay’s Mercedes Benz, which started going off once you pulled on the handle), he had finally grabbed you by the shoulders and manually directed you to his Tesla. You giggled as you got into the passenger’s seat, allowing him to buckle you in and watch over you as he called Jay to turn his car alarm off.
Heeseung shot you a glance as he drove out of the country club’s gated entrance. “You’re going straight to bed when we get home.”
“Don’t wanna.”
He surprisingly gave up fast on trying to convince you. “What do you wanna do, then?”
“I dunno.” You shrugged. “Anything. Wanna bake cookies? Or watch a show?”
“Down for a show. Don’t know if I trust you around kitchen appliances right now,” he answered. After letting out a giggle, you caught Heeseung’s smile illuminated by the moonlight. “See? Aren’t you having more fun than you would’ve had in the Bahamas?”
“I wouldn’t ask this question after I nearly got alcohol poisoning.”
“The important thing is that you didn’t.”
You snorted, but something fond unraveled in your chest. You rolled the window down and looked outside, watching the bright lights of the city twinkle and shine under the inky black sky. You remembered all the skies you watched with Heeseung this week—the hazy gray in the morning, the bright blues of the afternoon, and the faint peony glow at sunset. And, yeah, you would’ve given up the Bahamas any day for this.
“Yeah,” you answered him, though you weren’t quite sure if he could hear you over the wind, “I’m having a lot of fun, Hee.”
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Two weeks flew by far too quickly.
You were dumbfounded when you realized your parents were coming back the next day. You had spent two entire weeks solely with Heeseung, and you were having so much fun that you totally lost track of time. You were so caught up in your adventures that it had completely slipped your mind that summer would eventually come to an end.
Heeseung suggested that you two spent your last night doing something special. You had no idea what that meant, but you went along with whatever he had planned.
Apparently, he had been wanting to take you to see the stars, but you didn’t realize that he meant the observatory until you were in his car, parking on the steep slope of a hillside.
“It’s so far,” you complained.
He tutted. “It’s a five minute walk, princess, and it’s worth it. Trust me.”
You hesitated before grouching again, “It’s cold.”
Without another word, Heeseung took off his sweater. You tried to peel your eyes away from his white shirt that kept hiking up as he did. He passed it to you, and you couldn’t do anything but accept it because he was already getting out of the car. You wanted to hand it back to him because you knew he would be cold (made evident by the goosebumps that pricked his arms), but he profusely refused. He seemed perfectly content at the mere sight of you joining him.
He waited as you slipped on his sweater, the biggest grin stretching across his face. You were a little blindsided by how blinding Heeseung’s smile was, especially under the glow of the moon. Your cheeks heated up a little when you smelled faint traces of his Blackberry & Bay cologne in the fabric.
“You’re microscopic in my clothes,” he teased. You started walking a little faster to catch up with your friend, but his comment made you punch his shoulder.
“Oh, shut up.” You waved off the comment, but part of you liked how the sleeves of his sweater fell past your wrists. “We used to be the same height in, like, middle school.”
Heeseung barked out a laugh. “That was so long ago! Look at our height difference now.” Before you could anticipate his actions, he stepped in front of you and compared both of your heights.
You looked up at your best friend, raising a brow at his comment. Of course you were aware. Maybe at one point you denied it, but that was when you both were in elementary school and Heeseung would tug on your hair because he sat behind you.
Being this close to him made you a little nervous. After realizing that you had feelings for him, it was becoming difficult to keep them at bay. It was very clear that Heeseung had become much more masculine over the years with his buffer chest, muscular arms, and deeper voice.
And he looked extremely attractive.
“Yeah, I know you’re tall,” you replied flatly. It was normal for Heeseung to tease you, but whenever he did so in public, you always felt your heart squeeze in your chest. Then, he’d brush it off, and the feeling would fade out like bubbles floating to the ground. “You know, giving me your sweater and messing around like this probably gives people the wrong idea, right?”
“Oh… does it?” Heeseung mumbled, voice an octave higher than usual, and he turned his face away before you could detect the dust of pink across his cheeks. “By the way, have you been to a planetarium before?”
“Nope.”
You had always heard of the large domes that showcased the night sky. People sat underneath as a narrator droned on about stories from the past and the history of the universe. However, you hadn’t ever actually been to one, although you almost would’ve if you hadn’t gotten grounded before a class trip, resulting in all of your friends going to a planetarium show without you. You remembered Yizhuo was texting you throughout the entire trip, complaining about virtually everything that was going on and telling you how much she missed you.
“You’re kidding,” Heeseung’s eyes went round. “No way! You’ve never been to a planetarium?”
“Well—”
“Oh my god,” he continued, absolutely astounded. “Have you even lived?”
“I’ve just never had the chance!” you argued. “It’s not like anyone’s ever asked me to go to one. Plus, if there’s anyone I’d go with, I’d rather just go with you.”
Silence.
You and Heeseung had been settling into a lot of awkward pauses lately. It always followed some odd comment or action between you two, like when he got extremely close to you on the yacht. You still had no idea what exactly his intentions were during that whole ordeal, but your heart had never raced so fast.
Eventually, your silence was broken by an employee ushering you and Heeseung to walk past the velvet ropes and into the observatory building. You both were still silent upon walking in, but when you saw the signs pointing to the planetarium, you nudged your best friend’s side.
“It says the next showing starts in five minutes,” you pointed out.
“Fuck.” He slapped the pockets of his jeans, feeling for something solid in them. “I have my tickets—somewhere. Give me a second.”
Thankfully, he managed to figure out that he saved his tickets to his Apple Wallet. The sign stating that the shows were sold out nearly made your heart drop, but, of course, Heeseung had planned this out well in advance.
As always.
“Where should we sit?” you asked when you walked into the room, looking up at the dome-shaped ceiling in awe.
“Anywhere.” Heeseung grinned at you. “All we have to do is lay back and stare at the sky, so wherever you wanna sit.”
You both settled with two seats in the middle. It was smack dab in the center of the dome, right where the screen curved. Heeseung made a comment about how this was the ideal spot because it felt like you were getting sucked in by the stars.
When the show started, you gazed up at the screen in complete awe. Swirling nebulas and galaxies were painted across the night sky, blinking down at you. The narrator’s soothing voice made you feel absolutely immersed, and you had to grab the arm rest whenever the animation started speeding through the universe.
Heeseung booed when they showed Earth, throwing up a thumbs-down and then quickly shoving his hand back into his pocket, as if the planet would take offense.
And you realized you were in love with him.
You didn’t know why it hit you right then and there—a person droning on about space overhead, glancing over at your best friend to see him gawking at the solar system—but you were certain you would never feel this way with anyone else again. The feeling stampeded through your body, making your blood rush and your bones feel light. You were engulfed in a fire that burned only for Heeseung.
It felt so simple, yet all the more complicated. You were in love with your childhood best friend—the person who had been with you through everything.
It wasn’t like fireworks. Not a splash of ice cold water or like you had been kicked in the chest. It was more like slowly sinking in quicksand, not even realizing how deep you were until you were completely submerged.
You had been in love with Golden Boy for a long time now.
Later, after the show was over, he took you outside to overlook the city. Apparently, it was quite the sight to behold from this high up. You were still gushing on and on about the planetarium show, but as soon as you took a glance over the railing, you forgot all about the wonders of space.
Now, looking over all the bright lights really made it feel like the City of Angels. You were completely captivated by the sight. It was different from how it looked from the hot air balloon; everything was so miniscule from that height, but you could see how far the city stretched from here. The lights blinked past the horizon, and you were certain this was your first time seeing stars down below instead up in the sky.
Heeseung folded his arms onto the railing and tucked his head in them. “You can’t get this view anywhere else.”
“It’s beautiful,” you said, hardly audible.
“Yeah,” he replied. You wondered if he was talking about the stars above or the city below, so you turned your head to catch where he was looking. There was an alarming spike in your heartbeat when you realized he was looking at you, but Heeseung didn’t look away this time. “It really is.”
You never fully appreciated how gorgeous Los Angeles—never really looked past all the traffic and smog and crowd. The bustling city was tiring to keep up with at times. You saw it more as the city of burnouts than the city of stars.
But here, where the stars weren’t in the sky but down below, you realized that the brightest star of them all was the one right next to you.
It was Heeseung.
“You don’t still wish you were in the Bahamas, do you?” he asked suddenly, which spurred you to start laughing.
You stared up at him with incredulity in your eyes. “Hee, I never once wished I was in the Bahamas when I was with you.” You nodded to yourself. “I’d say you made this a successful summer.”
Your heart flipped in your chest when you saw those gleaming eyes and bright smile of his. It almost lit up the sky brighter than the city of Los Angeles itself. The way he was looking at you made you forget everything you were saying.
“Actually,” he started shyly, “there's something else that could make this summer perfect.”
“What’s that?”
“Will you go out with me?”
The question knocked you off orbit, electrifying every nerve in your body like it was cut wire. You weren’t sure what expression you wore on your face, but the shy look on Heeseung’s face was plunging you deeper in that inescapable quicksand. Of course, your friends had suspected this all along, but hearing it yourself was entirely different. You felt like you were glowing brighter than Polaris.
“I’ve liked you since we were kids,” he started to explain after gauging that you still needed time to process his words. “It’s not like I just felt this way overnight. I was just trying to make the right choices so that I could stay by your side for as long as I could. I mean, I’ll always be your best friend, Y/N, but I also wanna be something more than that to you.”
“And it’s okay if you don’t feel the same way,” he continued. “I knew that this could possibly ruin our friendship, but I also knew that if I didn’t tell you how I felt, then I would’ve been lying to you through college, too.” He sucked in a shuddering breath. “It’s only ever been you.”
Change was hard. You’d been at war with your mind for a while now over starting something new with Heeseung. Although it was unfamiliar and new, and although you were scared of things potentially not working out, you still wanted to try for him.
“You don’t have to worry about ruining our friendship.” The words were on your tongue like a pearl. Your soul leaked out of your body, straight into the Earth, then seeped back into you with newfound bravery. You blinked back tears that dared to spill and sounded so stupidly breathless when you confessed, “I’m in love with you, too, Hee.”
His eyes were as wide as saucers, unblinking. “You are?”
His voice was soft, imploring, almost desperate, so you stepped closer and cupped his cold cheeks with your warm hands. Heeseung’s gaze seemed faraway, but he placed his hands over yours, as if he was trying to make sure you were real.
“I don’t think there’s anyone else out there who would rent an entire hot air balloon just to make sure I wouldn’t miss the Bahamas.” You laughed, a moonstruck grin on your face. “And, for the record, I’d choose you over a stupid vacation any day.”
You had been waiting to see his face break into that dazzling smile of his where his eyes crinkled at the corners. Instead, Heeseung just gazed at you longingly before he placed a hand on your cheek and bent down to kiss you.
His mouth moved with yours carefully, almost like he was too scared to go any further. You moved your hands to loop around his neck, drawing him closer so that you could slowly deepen the kiss. You were grateful that Heeseung waited to match your pace, and soon he was dropping his hands to grab at your waist and pull you closer to him, too. It sent butterflies straight to the pit of your stomach whenever he smiled between kisses, mumbling something about how pretty you were or how he had been waiting to do this forever.
Sometimes, you realized, feelings didn’t need to be expressed through words. You didn’t need the confirmation because with Heeseung’s lips pressed to yours, you felt like you were glowing brighter than the stars above.
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You supposed you could say your parents were a little shocked to come back home and discover a major change in your relationship status.
You had to give them the rundown of what happened, of course. It wasn’t very hard to do, considering you had reiterated the same story to Yizhuo about a hundred times until she was satisfied. Thankfully, your other friends just needed to hear it once to fully grasp that Heeseung was now your boyfriend. For Yeji, you had to bring out a whiteboard just to draw everything out to her over FaceTime.
As you broke down what happened while your parents were in Rome, you noticed the silver necklace on your mother’s neck that glimmered whenever the light caught it. You smiled to yourself when you realized it was probably your stepfather’s honeymoon present, and you were grateful that your mother was able to experience such a wonderful love herself.
“See?” There was an excited gleam in your mother’s eyes as she bit into one of the chocolate chip cookies you and Heeseung made for them last night. She pointed the cookie in your stepfather’s direction. “I told you they’d get together!”
“I thought so, too!” he agreed. “That’s why I had that little talk with Heeseung when you two dropped us off at the airport.”
“That’s what you guys were talking about?!” you exclaimed, jumping up to your feet and then sinking back down in your seat with your hands covering your face. “I knew it was gonna be something embarrassing.”
“Oh, honey, don’t say that. Have a cookie.”
“Thanks, Mom,” Heeseung, who had been silent the whole conversation, spoke up. He reached over and took the cookie from your mother, but you smacked his hand lightly while he was bringing it to his mouth. “Hey! You almost made me drop my cookie!”
You huffed. “She was talking to me, idiot.”
You were honestly over-the-moon that dating Heeseung was this easy. You worried about having a boyfriend and having to go through the hassle of introducing him to your parents and waiting for them to warm up to him. With Heeseung, though, he was already like family in your household, so nothing felt too different.
Except that your parents could outwardly tease you both now.
Since you were in his parents’ good graces, too, everything seemed to click for you two. Both of your parents were planning to go out for dinner sometime this week to celebrate your new relationship, which you felt was a little over-the-top. You suspected that Mrs. Lee was hoping you would be her future daughter-in-law.
They were even planning on renting a Airbnb together for yours and Heeseung’s move-in at Yale. It was almost terrifying how everyone in your life seemed to be fully on-board for this relationship.
Not that you were complaining, though.
“Are you guys going somewhere now?” your mother asked, eyeing Heeseung’s white button-up that you were wearing over your swimsuit. “Make sure you wear sunscreen. It’s supposed to be the hottest day of the year.”
You checked your bag to make sure your sunscreen was, in fact, there. Heeseung took his baseball cap off to put it on your head, which made you crack a smile.
“Yeah, we’re going to the beach,” you said. “Yizhuo and Chenle wanted to spend the day at Santa Monica, and then we were gonna head over to Jungwon’s house.”
“Well, have fun.” Your mother moved to the kitchen to grab Tupperware to package the cookies. Your stepfather followed her in to help her out. “I’m sorry we couldn’t go to the Bahamas this year, but the beach has to be the next best thing, right?”
You shared a grin with Heeseung, and his eyes crinkled beautifully at the corners. “Yeah, it’s exactly like the Bahamas if I close my eyes.”
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AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ thank you for reading all the way to the end if you made it this far !! :’) i have always wanted to write pure fluff without any room for misunderstandings or angst LOL and heeseung is just the perfect embodiment of bff2l ♡ i hope you enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing this !! 
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enamored with the bill possessing Ford's body au. If you would feel up to it, do you have more tidbits? :3
I’m happy to see so many people enjoying it!! I have a lot of additional tidbits so I’ll just stick to giving a few for now:
— Dipper finds out Ford is the author a lot earlier, for the obvious reasons of Bill being present in Ford’s body. He doesn’t put the pieces together right away, only because initially, he hates Bill, disappointed that the ‘scientist’ his parents spoke about that he wanted to impress turned out to be nothing like what he had hoped, ignoring and dismissing him instead, even taking a liking to Mabel before him! He has this idealised version of the author in his head, someone who he relates to and finds comfort in, and he doesn’t want to taint that vision by suspecting it may be someone who he hates. He may be a mystery lover but he is still a twelve year old with a grudge.
It’s only after he and Bill start getting along that he brings it up, and Bill doesn’t think to lie. He’s just that surprised Dipper found it. He does lie about not remembering things though to avoid Dipper’s questions about the paranoia and why he hid it — as on the spot kind of thing, and that becomes Dipper’s mystery fixation of the summer.
— Stan and Bill have various nicknames for each other, with Bill’s main one for Stan being ‘Fez’, and Stan’s main one for Bill being ‘Goldie’.
— Speaking of them, when it comes to their relationship, they are genuinely friends after thirty years of living together, but what that friendship entails is where it gets complicated and I don’t think I can summarise here. I’d say it can best be described as two people who have come to understand each other very deeply, and are similar in a thousand ways, but they would rather throw themselves off a cliff than acknowledge or talk about that. There’s also the lingering anger and resentment on Stan’s end, not for taking Ford’s body, he knows Bill doesn’t want to be stuck here either, but for what he did to Ford before that, how he hurt him. He, much to his confusion, does care about Bill, and Bill, much to his own confusion as well, does care about Stan back, but their friendship is built on something awful, and that doesn’t just go away.
— On a sillier note, it was in 1990 that Stan realised Bill was his only friend and that he sort of enjoyed his company, and that truly was a horrifying moment. On the other end Bill finally admits to some degree he might care for Stan in 1994, which happens while both of them are drunk, and Bill likes to claim it didn’t happen. The image below also probably summarises the lighter aspect of their dynamic better than I could word it here:
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— Bill has taxidermy as a hobby and actually gives Dipper and Mabel a few lessons in it, creating some displays for the shack. Weirdly good bonding activity.
— Very specific ‘episode’ idea in my mind where Stan and Bill get framed by Faires that Bill angered a thousand years ago for a crime they didn’t commit, and Dipper and Mabel have to figure out how to prove their innocence, finding more about their Grunkles along the way, and also having to beat a fairy in a game of poker.
— Mabel at some point comes to the conclusion her “Grunkle Ford” had a bad breakup that he still hasn’t gotten over and makes it her goal to help him through it. This is part of her summer mission. It comes up frequently. It’s ridiculous I know but what is Gravity Falls without a generous amount of both angst and utter silliness.
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I’ll probably leave it at that for now! But if you’d want more or have any specific questions, I shall do my best. I’m still figuring out some stuff too so input will be helpful.
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arlana-likes-to-write · 2 months ago
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Happily Ever After
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Next Part of Happily Never After
Warning: kidnapping, character death (not you), torture, mention of past abuse, cannon typical violence, angst with a happy ending, fluff, everyone needs a hug.
Word Count: 14.4K
Wanda was trying to keep calm and have a level head. It would do no one good if she were to have a breakdown. They were in the conference room waiting for Maria. Bucky was playing a round of Mario Party with her boys, and Natasha was pacing with her phone glued to her ear, speaking rapidly in Russian. She would have been able to understand her if her mind wasn’t spiraling. She picked up words like ‘mother’ and ‘missing’. She guessed the redhead was talking to Melina and updating her on your sudden disappearance.
Wanda began to bite her nails. If you were here, you would have grabbed her hand and stopped her. But you weren’t here. You were missing, and Wanda was freaking out.
The door opened, and Yelena walked in, followed by Maria and someone Wanda assumed was Steve. She’d only seen the man in pictures. “Boys,” Bucky paused the game. Why don’t we go to the cafeteria while the grown-ups talk?” Billy looked at the new additions and then back at Wanda.
“We aren’t leaving our mom,” Oh, Wanda loved his heart. Each day, he reminded her so much of Pietro. He always knew when something was bothering her.
“It’s okay, sweetie,” Wanda said. Go with your brother and Bucky. I’ll come find you when we are done.” Billy was quick to hug her tight, and Tommy joined in. She needed a hug much more than she realized. She watched them leave. She was a little hesitant not to have them in her sight, but she knew Bucky would protect them.
“Wanda,” Maria said once the door closed. It’s good to see you again. It’s unfortunate to meet like this.” It was a brief meeting between her and the agent. You were invited to a gala in the city, and you introduced her to Maria. “This is my partner, Steve Rogers,” Natasha got off the phone, and everyone sat down. We will find her, I promise.”
“So you can confirm she’s been taken,” Natasha said. Steve nodded.
“As soon as you called Maria, we pulled up Y/n’s phone records,” he put a laptop on the table so Natasha, Yelena, and Wanda could see it and hit play.
A woman stood on the side of the road next to a smoking car. She began to flag down a passing car with a wave of her hand. Wanda recognized your car, stopping behind it, and you got out. You spoke with the woman before going to the hood and opening it. A cloud of smoke circled you, and you waved the smoke out of your face.
It happened quickly. Two men appeared in the nearby alley while you were bent over to look at the engine. The woman you were helping had a pipe in her hand and hit you in the back of your head. Before your body hit the ground, the two men caught you and dragged you down the alley. Steve closed the laptop. “Our team is tracking the vehicle and facial recognition as we meet here.”
“Her parents,” Yelena said. Where are they? They have to be behind this.” Before Maria could answer, the door opened again, making Wanda jump.
“Vision,” Wanda stared at her ex-husband. “What are you doing here?”
“I am so sorry,” Sarah appeared behind the man. “I told him this was a closed meeting, but he was persistent.”
“It’s fine, Sarah,” Natasha said. Your secretary nodded but narrowed her eyes at Vision before she left.
“I am sorry for interrupting,” he sat down in an empty chair and loosed the tie around his neck. “When I listened to the voicemail from the school, I knew something was wrong. I know Y/n wouldn’t leave our sons at school.” Wanda was having trouble processing everything that was going on. She watched her girlfriend get attacked and dragged into a van. Now, her ex-husband was showing genuine care for you.
“You hate her,” Natasha bluntly said. When did you start caring for her?” It was a valid question, and Vision looked offended by the accusation.
“I never hated her. We came to an understanding. Look,” he shook his head. “It’s not important. Is her sudden disappearance related to the Order of Protection?”
“Order of Protection?” Wanda questioned. “What are you talking about?” His eyes jumped on everyone in the room, hoping someone knew what he was talking about. Everyone stared at him. He cleared his throat.
“At the boys’ birthday party, she asked me how hard it was to get an Order of Protection in New York,” he spoke slowly. The party was four days ago. You went all this time without telling her. Wanda knew you were holding more back, but she trusted you to come with her. “This hypothetical order of protection was going involve a family member.”
“It has to be her parents,” Yelena said. “But all they’ve done is call her, right?” Maria sighed. Oh, Wanda hated the sound of it.
“When we find our best friend, remind me to slap her,” Wanda smiled at her dry humor. “I think we all need to take a trip to headquarters. We can catch you up to speed there.”
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
A cup of water was forced to your lips, and you downed all of it. It was a relief for your dry throat. “Are you ready for some visitors?” You stayed quiet, knowing you had no choice in the matter. Tiffany opened the door. A man wearing a gray suit walked in, and his shaggy blonde hair was parted to the side. Black glasses rested on his face, which he took off and put into his suit pocket. A strange feeling started to bubble in your stomach. Was it in anxiety? Stress? Or recognition? The knock on your head was throbbing and making it difficult to think. He smiled as he spoke, “It’s an honor to be in your presence. My name is Alexander Pierce.”
“I know you,” you whispered. “You’re friends with Fury. You were at the gala when SHIELD was given a key to the city.” The man chuckled.
“I’m glad our men didn’t completely knock all your brain cells out,” Pierce walked behind you, but you kept your eyes trained on the ground. You were so tired. “Did our beautiful host tell you who we are?”
“HYDRA,” you answered. You figured it would be easier to comply. “I don’t understand what you want with me. I’m not an agent. If you want money, I can give it to you.” You felt his hands on your shoulders and squeezed them.
“I call it an unfortunate circumstance,” he said. SHIELD has something we want, and in exchange, they get you back. Simple.” So you were bait, used because of your connection with the man on top.
“Fury doesn’t make deals with terrorists,” Pierce chuckled, grabbed your throat, and forced your head back.
“I’ve been told he has a soft spot for you,” he squeezed your throat and cut off your air supply. “If he does not do exactly as I say, he’ll receive you in pieces at his doorstep,” you gasped for air as he removed his hand. “Get comfortable. We’ll see each other soon.”
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
“Oh, I’m going to fucking kill her,” Natasha paced. Maria explained the note that was left for you. Her team went through hours of security footage and found no one out of the ordinary. “I am going to kick her ass.” She stopped pacing and grabbed the back of the chair. Wanda, Natasha, and Yelena sat in a room at SHIELD’s headquarters while Vision took the twins home after much conviction on Wanda’s part. “Why didn’t she tell us? Why didn’t you tell me?” She asked Maria.
“I couldn’t, and she told me she would tell you.”
“She’s stubborn, sestra,” Yelena said. “I’ll be there to help kick her ass too. Wait until Mama finds out.” Wanda was ready to have words with you, too. But that anger was pushed down by fear and worry.
“What’s the next steps? How are you going to find her?” Wanda questioned.
“They took her alive,” Steve said. “That means they want something, so they’ll contact us,” It was meant to erasure her. They were lucky they didn’t find your body, but you were being used as a pawn, and Wanda hated that, too. There was a knock on the door, and it opened.
“Boss,” it was Clint. “Patrol officers found the car. Do you want me to take a team to investigate?” Maria nodded.
“Take Coulson and Wilson with you,” Clint saluted and smiled at Wanda as he left.
“We’ll update you as we learn more,” Maria continued. “The best thing you can do is go home.”
“And there has been no word from her parents,” Natasha said. Maria shook her head. “Do you not find that weird? She gets kidnapped, and no one can find them. They have to be involved.”
“I think they are as well, but until the team finds them, I can’t ask what they know,” Maria rubbed her temple. “Off the record, I think they are a piece of shit,” Wanda smiled. “Nat, we are-” Wanda’s phone began to ring, cutting off the agent.
“Sorry,” it was probably Billy or Tommy who was wondering when she would be home. She looked at the unknown number calling her. “I don’t know who this is,” she showed Maria and Steve her phone.
“Go have Darcy start the trace,” Steve said, leaving the room rather quickly. “Put it on speaker, stay calm, and before they make any demands, ask to speak with her,” Wanda nodded. Her hands shook, and she felt her throat tighten. Natasha sat down next to her, grabbing her hand. She answered her phone and placed a call on speaker.
“Hello,” she heard breathing on the other side. “Whose there?”
“Wanda Maximoff,” a man’s voice slowly said. A shiver went down her spine as he said her name. “You go by your maiden name, right? Since your divorce from Vision.” She glanced at Maria. Her face was pinched, her head tilted as if she was trying to figure out who was talking to her. It was unsettling how he knew her.
“Who are you?” The man laughed.
“Ask the SHIELD agent in front of you,” he said. “Who is it? Hill? Fury?” The agent gave her a quick nod.
“Hill,” she answered.
“Alexander Pierce,” Maria said. “I thought kidnapping was beneath you.”
“Desperate times come for desperate measures,” Pierce said. “SHIELD has something I want, and I feel like it’s an easy trade.” Wanda saw Maria’s jaw clench.
“I want to speak with her,” Wanda said. “Prove to us she’s still alive.” Natasha tightened the hold on Wanda’s hand, almost painful.
“Clever girl,” Pierce said. Wanda listened to his footsteps. The sound of a smack and your pained groan shattered Wanda’s already fragile heart. “You have a phone call.”
“W-Wanda?” You questioned. Your voice was soft and rough. It broke the dam. She felt the tears run down her cheeks.
“Hi, sweetheart,” Wanda’s voice shook. “How are you?” You chuckled.
“I’ve been better. I’m sorry I didn’t pick the boys up from school,” you somehow managed to make Wanda laugh.
“You are such an idiot,” she smiled. “I love you.” She had to say it. If she wasn’t going to talk to you again, she wanted that to be clear. She loved you so much.
“I lo-” You let out another pain whimpered and gasped for air. Natasha was surely going to break her hand.
“I will be calling Fury,” Pierce directed it to Maria. “I expect him to answer, or his precious flower will be returned to him in a box.” He hung up, and Natasha released the tight hold on Wanda’s hand. As a heavy silence filled the small conference room, Wanda stared at her phone. Slowly, she looked up and locked eyes with Maria. A part of her wished she hadn’t. She saw anger deep within Maria’s eyes. Wanda expected that emotion, but she saw the fear that froze her down to her core.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Wanda stood in the waiting area. After the phone call, Maria rushed to see if they could trace the call. Her team wasn’t so lucky. She walked into Fury’s office and slammed the door behind her. “Hey,” Natasha knelt in front of her. “Do you and the boys want to stay with us until they find her?” Yelena sat next to her in the empty chair.
“The boss would have our heads if we let anything happen to you,” the blonde teased, nudging her shoulder against Wanda’s. Natasha smiled.
“I like my head,” she smirked. “It’s my money maker.” Yelena scuffed.
“You are so stupid,” Wanda smiled, wiping her cheeks. She stopped crying but she felt the dry tears. Yelena and Natasha were good and she understood why they were such an important part of your life.
“I appreciate it, but-”
“Wands, please,” Natasha cut her off. “It will give me peace of mind knowing the three of you are safe while all this is going on,” How could Wanda say no to that? She hated being a burden, but they were family.
“Okay,” you nodded. “I’ll have to talk to Vision about it.”
“Hell, that funk of metal can join,” Wanda looked at her, tilting her head. Natasha shook her head. “Inside joke between the boss and I.” The redhead smiled sadly. Yelena stood up as Maria walked over to them. Her face was edge in a frown.
“I’m assigning agents to your family,” Maria told Wanda. She knew not to question that.
“Who is Alexander Pierce?” Wanda asked. The question had been burning on her tongue since the phone call ended. Maria placed her hands on her hips and glanced over her shoulder.
“I could get fired or thrown into the RAFT if they find out I told you this. Got it?” Everyone nodded. “A few years back, we learned that SHIELD was infiltrated by a terrorist group called HYDRA. It’s been in the works for years. Pierce used to have Fury’s job, then he was promoted to the secretary of the World Council,” she sighed. “We’ve been working to remove HYDRA, but it’s been slow work.”
“So HYDRA is using Y/n to get something you took from them,” Maria nodded. “Any idea what they want?” Yelena asked.
“Information, maybe a HYDRA agent we arrested,” Maria shrugged. “It could be anything.”
“Maria,” Wanda said slowly. How likely will Fury give them what they want?” Wanda watched the agent’s face whiten, but she shook it off.
“It won’t come to that. We’ll find her before that. " The agent’s choice not to answer her question was enough to convince Wanda how serious this was.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Maria sighed as she watched the trio leave. There was a weight that rested on her chest. Her friend was gone, kidnapped because of her job. The friend in her wanted to burn down the city until she found you and not worry about the consequences. But she was the Deputy Director of an agency under public scrutiny. Everything needed to be done by the book. She turned around, put on her mask to cover her true feelings, and joined her team. “What do we know?” She asked.
“A few months back, a car dealership was robbed, and 3 SUVs were taken,” Sharon said and pulled up pictures of the car Maria recognized from the security footage of your kidnapping. “It was whipped clean, but Darcy is going through it.”
“Tracing the call got us a borough but nothing exact,” Steve said, placing a picture of Staten Island on the screen. “We can increase police activity, but that is a lot of ground to cover.” It was a complete waste of resources. She knew HYDRA was good, but it seemed like they were looking for a specific needle in a mount of needles, which concluded they had nothing. Maria couldn’t say that to her team.
“Alright, Carter. I need you to get your hands on any footage of this van—traffic cameras, ATMs, and pictures from social media. An SUV doesn’t just disappear. Work with Barton and go over the initial robbery now that we know it was HYDRA.”
“On it, boss,” Sharon stood up to grab coffee and head to MTAC. Clint stayed in his seat, but she would get back to him shortly.
“Wilson, Coulson, we need to figure out what they want before they tell us. Go through every arrest we made and our team on the West Coast. Contact Van Dyne if you have any issues,” the two agents nodded and got to work. It was still in the early stages, but the longer you were gone, the less likely you were to be found alive.
“Hill, can we talk?” Clint motioned to the small kitchen. Maria nodded, and the two agents walked over. He started a new pot of coffee, and Maria knew they would need it. “I found something at the dump site.”
“And you chose not to tell the team?” Clint nodded. “Why?”
“Because I don’t think it’s important for the investigation,” he looked over his shoulder and fished a black jewelry box out of his pocket. “I’m guessing you knew about this.” Maria nodded. Of course, she did. You told Natasha that you bought it, and by best friend code, Natasha told Maria before you could tell her. She and Natasha had a bet on when you would ask her. “Like I said, it’s not very important to the investigation.” Maria took the small box and put it in her pocket.
“Thanks, Clint,”
“What are you going to do with it?” She wasn’t 100% sure.
“Keep it safe till we find her,” she smiled. The man nodded and joined the rest of the team. Her gut instinct was telling her to keep it safe so that when you returned, you could ask her, but the situation was complicated. Maria knew you well—not as well as Natasha, but she saw you as a sister. If anything were to happen to you, Maria knew you would want Wanda to have it. For now, it would be safe with her.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Honestly, Wanda was exhausted. She couldn’t imagine how you, Maria, and Natasha were feeling, but she was tired. All she wanted was to curl up in the safety of your bed with your arms around her, but that wasn’t possible.
After she left SHIELD, she drove to her apartment and your house to pack a bag for her and the boys. Now, she sat outside Vision’s house, gathering the energy to go inside. How was she going to tell Tommy and Billy? They were going to be heartbroken.
Sighing, she exited the car and walked to the front door. When she got to Natasha’s house, she needed a tall glass of wine. Wanda rang the doorbell, and Tiffany opened the door with a smile. “Wanda, hi, please come in,” Wanda fought, not to roll her eyes. I am so sorry about Y/n. If there is anything I can do, please let me know,” Wanda nodded.
“Where is Vision?” she asked. The last thing she wanted was to have a heart-to-heart with her ex-husband’s current girlfriend.
“In his office,” Without another word, she walked to the man’s office and knocked on the open door. Her ex-husband looked up from the file he was reading.
“Has there been an update?” She closed the door behind her and walked over to him.
“I received a phone call from the people that took her,” she stated.
“What do they want? If it’s money, I can help,” she shook her head and glanced at the door, ensuring it was closed.
“She’s being used as a bargaining chip. They want something SHIELD has,” Vision looked at her and then at the closed door behind her.
“Is this about HYDRA?” He whispered. Wanda sat down in the empty chair.
“How do you know about HYDRA?” The man glared at her.
“I work for the district attorney,” he deadpanned. “Of course, I know about it,” this time, Wanda did not stop herself from rolling her eyes. She was always amazed at how long she stayed with him. “If HYDRA has her, this is concerning.”
“What have you told the boys?” She asked.
“Nothing,” he said. “I wanted to wait for you. You were always better at breaking tough news to them,” she smiled.
“Natasha asked if I could take them and stay at her house. She offered a place for you, too,” Wanda almost laughed at the surprised look on his face. “Maria is assigning agents to you and us.”
“I don’t need protection,”
“It’s not up for debate, Vision,” Wanda snapped but sighed. “They knew my phone number. They knew I was at SHIELD when they called, so they had people watching. As much as I hate you sometimes,” the man chuckled. “I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
“Careful Wands,” he smirked. “People might think you care about me.”
“You are a jackass,” she admitted, but she did care about him. He was a great partner in the beginning, but they grew apart. It happened. He gave her Billy and Tommy. “Let’s go tell the boys. Are they in their room?” He nodded and stood up. They walked to the boy’s room. She had no idea how to tell them. It was her job to protect them, to protect them from the evil in the world. But the evil in the world was after her family, and they had the right to know the truth.
Tommy was playing video games, a game you gifted them, and Billy was reading a book off your bookshelf. You meant the world to them, and Wanda’s heart was breaking. “Hi, Mom,” Billy said. “Do you know where Y/n is?” Tommy paused the game. Wanda sat down next to Tommy, and Vision next to Billy.
“Not yet, son, but the authorities are looking for her.” Tommy frowned.
“Something bad happened, right?” He asked. “She wouldn’t just leave us,” he looked at Billy, who nodded in agreement.
“Yes, something bad happened, but Maria and the SHIELD agents are doing everything possible to bring her home.” Wanda ran her hands through Tommy’s hair and rested it on the middle of his back.
“Why would someone take her?” Tommy asked. “What did she do?” Wanda sighed.
“The world is filled with evil people. Your father has faced some of them with his job. “Sometimes, we may never know the why,” Tommy rested his head on her shoulder, and Billy leaned into his father. It could have been for money or revenge.” The world wasn’t black and white. Wanda knew you were being used as leverage, but if Pierce thought Fury wronged him, it could be seen as revenge, too. Living in Slovakia during a civil war taught her a lot about perspective.
“I want her to come home,” Billy whispered.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
“That’s all we have,” Maria gave Fury an update. To put it lightly, the team had nothing, which wasn’t a surprise to Fury. HYDRA went under the radar for years. But he saw the frustration on his agents, especially those close to you. Maria dropped her professional stance and slumped down in the empty chair. “What the hell are we going to do, Nick?” She asked. “SHIELD doesn’t make deals with terrorists, but this is Y/N we are talking about,” Fury was furious with Pierce for using you to get to him. Pierce was his friend, the reason he sat as the director of SHIELD, and he knew how important you were to him.
“We’ll save her and stop Pierce,” was all Fury could offer the agent, whom he ‘adopted’ as well. “Go lead the team and take care of yourself,” she nodded and left his office. The man sighed. There was a crushing weight on top of his chest. He needed a few seconds to be alone.
He wasn’t a sentimental guy. His office had very few personal decorations and kept it that way for a reason: He never wanted anyone to know who he was close to. This provided it. Fury opened up a drawer in his desk and took out a bottle of whiskey. The glass bottle had a lighthouse engraved on it. It was a gift from you when you signed your first deal with your company. The whiskey was gone, but Fury kept the bottle.
He was so proud of you that day, even though he never told you. He hoped he hadn’t missed his chance.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Natasha was pouring a glass of wine for herself and Wanda while the mother of two settled the twins into the guest room. In times like this, Natasha was grateful she got a big house. Other times, it felt lonely. She heard Bucky before he saw him. The contrasting feeling of his arms wrapped around her waist. The woodsy smell of his cologne relaxed her even more. “A little early to be hitting the bottle,” she rolled her eyes at the teasing tone. “How are you, doll?” She was a mess because she could do nothing but wait. Everything was out of her control. She sipped the wine and looked out the window to see the SHIELD agent outside her home.
“When do you think Steve will be home?” She changed the topic of the conversation. She was not in the right headspace to talk about her feelings. Bucky sighed.
“Late. He probably won’t come home until Maria sends him home, or we go get him,” Natasha chuckled. That sounded right. The man was dedicated to his job, and you were the reason the three of them were together.
“Is that for me?” Wanda asked. Wordlessly, Natasha handed the glass to her. She sighed after she took a sip. “What can I make for dinner?”
“You don’t need to cook, Wanda. I was going to order takeout or something,” Wanda bit her lip.
“I need to do something to keep busy, or I’ll go insane. Please,” Natasha knew the feeling. She was two seconds away from going into the office to finish work, but she knew Bucky and Steve would not like that.
“The kitchen is yours, Wanda,” Bucky said. The mother of two gave him a grateful smile before going through the cabinets. Natasha was grateful she recently placed a grocery order. She sat on the island and watched Wanda move around the kitchen. The conversation flowed naturally, and it was meaningless. It was to just fill the silence.
Natasha understood how you fell for her so quickly. Even with the intense situation they all found themselves in, there was a calming presence about her. The Russian remembered the day you met Wanda. She was pissed you were late to the meeting, but her anger melted away when she saw the love-sick look on your face.
At first, she was worried. You recently ended your relationship with Sharon. Sharon wasn’t bad, but she wasn’t the person for you. You seemed to hide parts of yourself that you showed with Wanda.
“Why did you get in trouble?” Wanda asked for the water to boil. She was making a pasta dish, and it smelled amazing. Natasha found it unfair you both were good in the kitchen.
“Because I wouldn’t rat on her,” Natasha laughed. “Fury dragged us both back to the station. Oh, my mother was pissed. I was grounded for three weeks.” It was harder for Melina to punish you since you weren’t technically her kid, but she took away privileges when you were at their house. “Bad boys for life, you know?” Bucky chuckled with a slight shake of his head. He was leaning against the counter.
“I’m surprised you didn’t get into real trouble,” he said. “You are lucky Fury has a soft spot for Y/n.” Natasha rolled her eyes at the man. Fury saved your life. She was grateful for the man. Suddenly, the front door swung up. The sound startled her, and Wanda and Natasha jumped from her seat - the chair fell to the ground with a loud bang.
“James Barnes,” Melina snapped. “But that gun down,” Natasha stared at her parents, heart racing.
“What the fuck is your problem?” She snapped. Bucky put the gun that was hidden under the junk drawer away. She was unaware there was a gun there. “You can’t just barge in here with everything going on.”
“Why not?” Alexei closed the door with his foot, and Natasha cringed at the sound. The man’s hands were full of luggage. “The nice man gave me a badge,” he said, dropping a bag to hold up the lanyards. I feel like I am a secret agent like in American movies.” Natasha groaned but looked at Wanda when she giggled.
“Don’t encourage him,” she said. “It will only make it worse.” Natasha heard the pounding of feet coming down the stairs. Damn, her house was going through it. The twins jumped from the second to the last step.
“We heard yelling,” Tommy said. “And a loud bang.”
“Is everyone okay?” Natasha fixed her fallen chair as the boys walked over to their mother.
“We’re okay,” she said, placing her arms around them as they hugged each other. “Sorry for the scare.” Bucky was helping with the bags and bringing them to the guest suite.
“Meet my parents,” Natasha introduced them. “Alexei, Melina, this is Wanda and her sons, Billy and Tommy. " The twins managed to remove themselves from their mother and wave at the two new additions.
“It’s nice to finally meet you,” Wanda said with a smile. “I’ve heard great things.”
“We as well,” Melina said, pulling your girlfriend into a hug. Natasha saw the sudden contact, which surprised her. “Now, how can I help?”
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Once dinner was eaten and the dishes were put away, Natasha watched Bucky add another log to the fire outside. Wanda and the twins were asleep, so Steve, her parents, Yelena, and Kate were left to enjoy the cooler weather. Natasha leaned further into Steve’s warmth. She missed him. Even though she knew he would instead be working, having everyone under the same roof gave her peace of mind. “I wish I could tell you more,” Natasha jumped back into the conversation as Bucky sat beside her—his flesh arm around both of them. “We don’t have anything solid,” Yelena huffed.
“That’s such bullshit,” Yelena said. “You just can’t tell us anything.” Kate squeezed Yelena’s leg. Steve sighed.
“I would about this,” he said. “The car was stolen from a dealership and whipped clean. Coulson and Carter are going through witness statements. It’s still in the early stages,” Natasha sighed and felt Steve’s lips on her forehead. She knew the team was doing everything they could, but still, it was killing her.
“We know you guys are doing your best,” Melina said. “We are just worried.”
“Trust me, I get it. I’ve never seen Maria or Fury this stress before.” Natasha couldn’t imagine the guilt Fury was dealing with.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Maria sent most of the team home. They’ve been racking their brains and staring at screens. Fresh eyes were needed for a case like this. She glanced over her computer to watch Fury work in silence, reviewing classified files that he and Pierce worked on. The man was quiet. To anybody else, they would assume it was normal. But Maria knew the man. The director was worried and ridden with guilt. Hell, he jumped when his phone started to ring. Maria wondered what was going through his head. “Fury,” he answered.
“Nick,” Pierce’s voice sent a deep rage through Maria. She never experienced this type of anger before. “It’s been a long time, old friend,” Fury rested his arms on his desk.
“I think you lost the right to call me friend,” Maria smiled. “Tell me what you want so I can tell you to go fuck yourself,” Pierce tisked.
“You have always been quick to anger,” he said. It was my only worry when appointing you to the director position.” Fury’s jaw clenched. “Say hello, little canary. " It was like a freight train ran over Maria. It had been years since she had heard that nickname.
“Hi, Nick,” you said. Maria watched Fury’s face soften. You were his soft spot. Maria heard the distinct sound of a gun’s safety turning off. “You know I needed a vacation, but this wasn’t what I had in mind.” God, you were an idiot. Only you would try to crack a joke in a severe situation. “Anyways, don’t give in, these no-good, backstabbing, cock eating terrorists,” the sound of someone hitting you and your pained groan caused Fury to flinch.
“Feisty,” Pierce laughed. He must have taken the phone off speaker because the sounds you were making faded. You were trying so hard to be quiet and muffle your screams. “Did you teach her that? You never respected your superiors.”
“What do you want, Pierce?”
“I knew she was the way to break you,” he must have called off your beating because Maria could no longer hear you. “I want Brock Rumlow released, and the tesseract returned to its rightful owner,” Maria’s stomach dropped. The tesseract was a massive power source that could power enhanced weapons.
“We need time,” Fury said, showing no emotion from the news. “Rumlow is a high-profile inmate.” It was purposeful, not to mention the tesseract.
“You have 72 hours to hand over Brock and the tesseract, or your little birdie will have her wings cut off.” Pierce hung up. There was a deafening silence in his office. Then Fury acted quickly. He picked up his phone and threw it against the wall. The device shattered on impact.
“Nick,” Maria said slowly.
“Hill, leave,” but she stayed. “Deputy Director that is an order,” he damned. She was never one to disobey, but she felt frozen, watching the normally calm and collected man fall apart. He closed his one good eye and let out a shaky breath. “Maria, please.” The agent nodded and stood up.
“Take care of yourself, Nick,” she said and left. The door closed behind her, and she leaned against the wooden door. “Dammit,” she whispered. This was bad. Really bad. If Pierce just asked for Rumlow, they could have justified the trade. But they could not get their hands back on the tesseract. World War 3 would be a better fate. “Fucking dammit.” Forgive us, bean. We are so sorry.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
You felt the blood dripping down your head, and there was a ringing in your ears. The muffled voices of Pierce hurt your head. Do you think he called for a doctor? Hands grabbed your chin and forced your head up. The sudden movement made you nauseous. “Awe, poor baby,” it was Tiffany.
“How-” you let out a shaky breath. “How did you know about the nickname?” You were a public figure. People were interested in who you were as your company was plastered all over the city. But there were some things you kept private, everything about your parents. Before your first deal, you made them sign NDAs. It was illegal for them to go to the press and try to tear you down.
That nickname, though—you hadn’t heard it in years. Your father called you that. Canaries represented freedom because they are independent spirits. It was a double-edged sword. On one hand, he saw you as extremely independent, but he saw it as disobedience.
Pierce smirked, “We had inside information. Would you like to see it?” You were slow to answer, you were forced to stand, and you were dragged out of the room. Maybe you should have noticed the hallways Pierce’s men dragged you down. But you were struggling to keep your eyes open and the contacts of your stomach in your stomach. There were a few left turns. Maybe a right. The place was massive. Even if you managed to escape the room they kept you in, your wounds kept you from running.
Pierce opened a door, and you were brought into a room with a glass plane on one side. The man flipped a switch, and you saw what was beyond the one-way window. Your parents. They were trapped just like you, but they lacked your injuries.
They looked older from the last time you saw them as the years of drinking and partying finally caught up to them.
“It’s a little sad actually,” Pierce said. You looked at the man, who was staring at your parents. “All we did was offer them some money, and they would not stop talking,” he sighed. “I guess you know where you stand with them. They did try to warn you.” You watched them through the glass. Your father paced the entire perimeter of their room while your mother sat on the mattress. You could tell she was annoyed with him but bit her tongue. There had to be multiple fights between them. Suddenly, Pierce taped on the glass, and the door on the other side opened.
“We told you everything,” your father told the man who walked in and closed the door behind him—a sinking feeling formed in your stomach. “We held up our end of the bargain. Give us our money.”
“Please let us go,” your mother said and stood up. “You don’t have to pay us.” Your father slapped her across the face. She recoiled in pain, but it was a sight you’ve seen so many times. You saw it coming before they did as the man reached behind his back and pulled out a pistol.
“Pierce don-” All it took was two bullets, and their bodies slumped to the ground. People who experience a near-death experience said their life flashed before their eyes. You could say the same when someone witnessed death so closely.
Your parents were not good people. They used and abused you for the better part of your life, but you never wished for their death. You wished for another warm hug from your father as the smell of pine and cigar smoke surrounded you. You wished for another kiss on your cheek from your mother that felt sticky due to the cheap stick she wore. You wanted one more birthday, one more Christmas. One more chance to be a family.
“Y-you,” you stuttered. “You killed them. Why?” You couldn’t tear your eyes away from the pool of blood that surrounded their heads.
“Because they were useless to me,” Pierce grabbed your chin and forced your eyes away to look at him. “Do you understand now? I dispose of things that aren’t useful. Understand?” You nodded. “Don’t mourn them,” he dropped his hand. “They never cared about you.”
That was the story everyone told you. They never cared about you. They only cared about your status and money. But once upon a time, you were daddy’s little girl and mommy’s perfect angel. Once upon a time, you were a family. Now that story was over, and their blood pooled on the concrete.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Wanda sipped her coffee as she watched Melina help Billy and Tommy with schoolwork. It was an easy agreement between Vision and her. The boys would be home-schooled until you were home, and the people behind your capture were caught. Even her job let her take time off. There was no way she was in the suitable head space to take orders from customers.
Bucky answered the doorbell and welcomed Maria into the house. “Melina,” the agent said. “It’s been too long.” Wanda watched the two embrace. I didn’t know you were in town.”
“They surprised us last night,” Bucky sighed. “I almost shot them,” he deadpanned. Wanda laughed with a shake of her head.
“So, a typical family gathering,” she patted the veteran on the back. “Is Natasha around? I have an update.” Tommy looked up from his homework, a hopeful look on his face.
“Did you find her?” Tommy asked. Maria looked at the twins with a smile.
“Not yet,” she said. “But we are working hard to bring her home safely.” Tommy deflated at the news. They moved into Natasha’s home office while Kate hung out with Billy and Tommy. “Her captures called last night and made their demands.”
“What do they want?” Yelena asked. Maria sighed.
“The release of an inmate and access to a very powerful weapon,” Wanda’s stomach sank. “He gave us 72 hours.” There was no need for her to say more. Wanda could fill in the blanks on her own.
“How likely is Fury to comply?” Melina questioned. Maria’s silence was enough of an answer.
“Maria, this is Y/n we are talking about. Are you telling me you and Fury are going to let some psychopath kill her?” Maria flinched at the accusation. Wanda watched the moment something inside of Maria snapped; the dam finally broke.
“Do you think I want this? Do you not believe me when I know how much she means to everyone in this room?” She asked. Her voice shook as she tried to keep her voice calm. “If I had it my way, I’d burn this city to the fucking ground to find her. But I know,” she pointed to herself. “What will happen if these fuckers get their hands back on the Tesseract and Rumlow.” She threw her arms to the side. “This isn’t easy for us, Nat. Believe me. I hate that we have to choose between one life and millions.” It was the classic trolley problem. Instead of a bay stander ready to intervene to choose what track to take, it was Fury. But he knew the one person on the track. It was you, someone he considered a daughter. Natasha’s tough exterior crumbled.
“Maria, I-” the agent held her hands to stop her.
“At the end of the day, it’s not our decision. National security is at risk, so we need approval from the World Council,” Maria sighed. “Fury is meeting with them while I’m here.”
“A prison transfer that big is not an easy task,” Melina added.
“Exactly what we told Pierce, but he knows how the system works. So we have time to come up with a plan. Darcy is tracing the phone calls. Hopefully, with two calls from him, it will help narrow the search,” Maria explained. “I need you all to have faith in me. I am doing everything I can to bring her home alive.”
“We do,” Wanda finally said. The agent looked at her. Maria’s fingers grazed her pant pocket, but her hand fell back to her side. It was such a small gesture that everyone missed it except Wanda, who raised her eyebrows in question.
“Wanda, can I speak to you? Alone.” Wanda nodded at Maria’s request and sat down on Natasha’s court. She watched the agent hug the redhead, whisper something, and close the door behind her. Maria sat down with a sigh.
“For what it’s worth,” Wanda spoke softly. “I don’t think she would want you to give them anything if it meant people would get hurt,” Maria chuckled.
“She said something along those lines when Pierce called. It was more like, ‘Don’t give into these no good, backstabbing, cock eating terrorists,’ Maria mimicked your voice so well it caused laughter to bubble out of Wanda. Maria smiled. “God, I want her home so bad.”
“Me too,” Wanda whispered, whipping away a tear running down her cheek. “What did you want to talk about?” Maria tapped her hands against her thighs. Wanda wasn’t going to push. Your friend was going through a lot. Finally, she put her hand in her pocket and pulled out a small black jewelry box. Wanda stared at it, her heart beating so fast she feared it would stop. “I’m flattered, Maria, but I’m spoken for,” it was a knee-jerk reaction to joke about it. Maria rolled her eyes and handed it to her.
“She would want you to have this if something were to happen to her,” she said. Her hands shook as she opened it and stared at the diamond ring. Where did Maria find this? How long have you had it? “Clint found it when he searched the car that was dumped. It must have fallen out of her pocket.”
The ring had a three-diamond stone that was cut in a pear shape. It was simple, but it was an eye-catcher and cost more than she made it a year. Her hands shook as she placed it on her finger. A perfect fit. It was no surprise to her that you knew her ring size. Now, she couldn’t help the tears that escaped her eyes and ran down her cheeks. Maria put her hand on her shoulder to offer support, and then her phone rang. She offered Wanda a smile and answered it.
“Hey Coulson, what do you got?” Wanda whipped the tears out of her eyes. A range of emotions passed through Maria’s eyes: anger, relief, and disbelief. “Yeah, send me the address. I’ll be right there.” She hung up.
“What is it?” Wanda asked. Maria slapped her phone against her hand.
“That was Phil. Patrol officers found two bodies,” the very little food in Wanda’s stomach began to turn. “It’s her parents.”
Delete Created with Sketch.
You weren’t sure how to feel. Everything felt numb, not even when the doctor came to disinfect your wounds; you felt nothing. You weren’t sure if you should feel anger or cry or be relieved that you were free from them. “Oh, come on,” Tiffany pushed herself off the wall and walked behind you. You felt her hands on your shoulder and squeezed them. Her touch burned against your skin. “Why mourn them when it is their fault?” She began to massage your shoulders. “Well, I guess it’s your fault too,” she continued when you stayed quiet. “Their last act of loving parents was to try to warn you,” you remembered Pierce saying the same thing.
“What-what do you mean?” You asked. Finally, she stopped touching you and stood in front of you, tilting your chin up.
“The phone calls,” she said. “If you answered them, they would have told you everything.”
“Who sent the note then?” Your brain was becoming less foggy. Tiffany smiled.
“That was me,” she said. “We were worried if you spoke to them, you would have believed them. The note was to make you believe it was another fabricated lie. Poor baby,” she cooed. “Just a dumb kid desperate for mommy and daddy’s love.” She dropped your head and heard her leave.
You hated this sinking feeling that surrounded you. There was so much guilt, and you hated it. You wanted to go home. You wanted to crawl into bed with Wanda’s arms around you. A few tears fell down your cheek, and a sob echoed in your chest. It felt good to finally cry.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
At this point in her career, Maria never visited crime scenes. She trusted her agents to follow protocol and report back to her. Still seeing the bodies of those that were killed due to the evilness in the world made Maria’s stomach twist into knots. Now, she was going to see the bodies of people she knew. That wasn’t going to be easy. Sighing, she stepped out of the safety of her car and onto the busy city sidewalk.
It was packed with reporters and regular citizens who hoped to get a glimpse of the action. Maria could never understand the public’s fascination with crime and death. Ignoring the questions from the reporters, she ducked under the yellow tap that the patrol officer held up for her. Phil met her, and once they were out of earshot from the crowd, he sighed. “Their fingerprints identified them, but we are waiting for you to make a positive ID.” Maria nodded.
“Any witnesses?” She asked.
“Two joggers found the bodies,” he pointed to where Sharon was talking to them. I’m having Wilson pull the camera footage, and Barton is talking to shop owners.” That’s good. Hopefully, someone saw something and wasn’t scared to say anything. They were in a populated part of the city—a perfect spot for joggers and tourists. It was a risky spot to dump two bodies. Someone had to see something.
Maria pulled on a pair of gloves from her pocket. Steve is taking pictures of the crime scene. “Shit,” Maria whispered when she got closer. It was them. A single gunshot to the forehead was the most likely the cause of death, but Strange would confirm it through the autopsy. “I never thought they’d die. They seemed immortal.”
“No sign of a struggle,” Steve said. Maria held up your father’s hand and saw no bruising. She held it while Steve took a picture. Their bodies were placed next to each other, arms at their side, and their hands were almost touching. Even after death, they were handled with care.
Shit. How was she going to tell you? Maria stood up and ignored the ache in her bones. She was getting too old for this. “Bag and tag everything,” she took off her gloves. “A clue has to be here to find what happened to them.”
“Sounds good, boss. " She took her phone out of her pocket and called Fury on her way to the car. He answered as soon as she was in the car.
“It’s them,” she pinched the bridge of her nose. “Single gunshot to the forehead. No defense wounds. Do you think it was Pierce?”
“Maybe,” he sighed. “He had someone else pull the trigger. There is no way he did it himself.”
“I understand killing them if they were no longer needed, but why dump their body in a public area? It’s like he wanted us to find them,” she leaned back in her seat, resting her free hand on the steering wheels.
“I think he wanted us too,” Fury said after a silence. “A reminder that anyone can be removed once they aren’t useful.” Great. Wonderful.
“The team is finishing up here. I’ll call the Romanoffs and have them meet me at headquarters.”
“Understood. See you soon,” Maria hung up and threw her phone into the passenger seat. She had to keep reminding herself that you were still useful, still a pawn in all of this, so Pierce wouldn’t kill you.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
“How’s dad?” Billy asked Tommy as he returned from the kitchen with two sports drinks. Tommy handed one to Billy and sat down. The game started up again.
“He’s okay,” Tommy answered. “He seems a little lonely. I told him he could come over, but he doesn’t want anyone to feel awkward.” Billy sighed. Natasha’s house was anything but lonely except for right now. Natasha, Melina, and Alexei had to go to SHIELD headquarters; they wouldn’t tell them why. Mom was taking a nap; Billy wasn’t blind to her cheeks being blotchy. Yelena was running your company, and Kate, sitting with them, left to take a business call. “Is Tiffany not at the house?” Tommy shook his head.
“I guess he hasn’t seen her since Mom told us what’s going on,” Tommy said. That was two days ago. “She texted him saying he’s caught up at work or something,” Billy frowned.
“It’s a little weird. Y/n gets kidnapped, and Tiffany low-key disappears.” Tommy was quiet but tilted his head. “And we did overhear her speaking on the phone in German. I don’t even know she spoke another language,” Tommy nodded.
“Oh yeah, I remember that. She bribed us with foot-long chocolate bars to keep it a secret,” Tommy suddenly paused the game. “Do you think Tiffany works for the people involved in the kidnapping?” Billy looked around; there was still no sign of Kate or Yelena. He stood up and grabbed Kate’s laptop; the Bishop Security logo moved across the screen.
“It wouldn’t hurt to do our investigation,” a smile grew on Tommy’s face.
“Who are you, and what have you done with my goody two-shoes brother?” Billy rolled his eyes.
“Shut up and help me,”
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Yelena was hanging on by a thread. With you gone and Natasha processing your kidnapping poorly, the business fell to her. On any other day, she would have jumped for joy at getting this opportunity, but she was tired. The world continued to move even when Yelena wished it would. So when Tony called to give an update on production, she had to take it. “So Blondie, how are you? You holding everyone else together like you are with the company.” Yelena smirked and ignored the annoying nickname.
“Trying,” she sighed. “I had to watch Natasha flip on Maria.”
“I would have paid money to see that,” the man was such a playboy, even with a wife and daughter. “Any updates on the case?” Yelena closed her laptop. Only a select few outside those closest to you knew the truth. It was Monica’s job to spin the story with the press.
“They made their demands last night,” Yelena told him. I guess they want an inmate released and something called the tesseract.” Tony let out a long hiss and then got quiet. It was always odd when the man was quiet.
“Did you say tesseract?”
“Yes, why?” Yelena leaned back in her sister’s chair.
“I never thought I’d hear that again,” Tony sighed. “Loki and Thor found it in New Asgard. They called SHIELD because of how powerful it is. SHIELD called my team to run an analysis on it, but before we could get onto the plan, they called us off and told me they had a closer team,” Yelena frowned. “A year or two go by, and I get another call from them to look at it.” I know what will happen if they get their hands back the tesseract and Rumlow, as Maria said. Yelena could guess HYDRA stole it, and SHIELD got it back and captured Rumlow in the process. Now, you were a pawn in this massive chess game, a piece everyone sacrifices without hesitation.
“How powerful is it?” Yelena asked. “Be honest with me, Stark.” Again, Tony sighed, and she heard his own chair lean back.
“If it were to fall into the wrong hands, WWIII would be the end of all war,” he said. His tone sent a shiver down Yelena’s spine. “There won’t be an Earth to live on after.” Yeah, Yelena got the picture.
“Thanks Stark. Sorry, I asked,” the man chuckled.
“Keep me updated, Blondie.”
“And I told you to stop calling me that,” she hung up the phone but still heard his laughter. “Osel (jackass),” Yelena rubbed her temples. Shit. This was bad. Really, bad, and she understood why SHIELD was so hesitant to hand it over just to save you. Sighing, she stood up from Natasha’s desk and walked out of the office back to the living room. She heard the twins arguing before she saw them
“Tommy, let go!” Billy said. “You are going to break it.”
“You let go! You said you needed my help, and clearly, you don’t know what you are doing. " She rounded the corner and watched them fight over a laptop that belonged to her girlfriend. She saw the stickers on the top.
“What are you doing?” They jumped and dropped the laptop. Luckily, Tommy’s reflexes were fast, and he caught it before it hit the ground.
“We weren’t doing anything,” Billy smiled. Yelena narrowed her eyes and closed the distance. She held out her hand, and Tommy gave her the laptop. “If we tell the truth, how much trouble will we get in?”
“Depending on the reasoning for almost breaking Kate’s laptop,” the twins cringed, and Yelena heard Kate’s footsteps.
“What’s with all the yelling? And why are you holding my laptop?” Yelena gave it back to her.
“I was just about to find out,” Billy sighed.
“We want to help SHIELD find Y/n,” he admitted. Yelena’s tough exterior softened, and she sat beside the boy. “We had a theory and tried to use Bishop Securities to help.” Yelena sighed.
“I get you want to help,” the blonde said. “But why didn’t you tell us or another adult?” Tommy groaned and fell back onto the couch, his hands covering his face.
“Because you guys don’t tell us anything, why should we tell you?” It was a fair question. Yelena knew it was to protect them. They cared a lot about you, and it must be hard to always be in the dark. Kate sat next to Tommy.
“Tell us what you are thinking, and I can show you how to do it,” the brothers said, looking at each other in silence. Tommy nodded.
“We think our dad’s girlfriend is working with the people that took Y/n,” Yelena had to be honest; she was not expecting that. She knew they weren’t fond of her, but accusing her of being a terrorist was a little extreme. “Look, I know it sounds crazy-”
“It does,” Kate cut him off.
“But we have evidence,” Billy continued. “Our dad said she hasn’t been around a lot and is always at the house. Isn’t it weird that at the same time, something happens to Y/n, and Tiffany disappears?” It was weird but hardly evidence.
“And we overheard her talking in German on the phone,” Again noting that scream, ‘I’m part of a terrorist group hellbent on starting WWIII,’ “She bride us with chocolate bars not to tell anyone about it,” Even Yelena thought it was weird.
“You know,” Kate said slowly. “It wouldn’t hurt to look at all possible leads.”
“Even if it’s extremely illegal,” Yelena countered.
“It’s not illegal if you don’t get caught,” Kate smiled and opened her laptop. Yelena watched her girlfriend pull up the Bishop Security system. “Alright, what am I looking for?” She looked between the three of them. When no one answered, Yelena sighed. She was against this idea because Kate could get in trouble, but everyone was desperate for answers.
“Maria thinks the ransom note was dropped off on Tuesday,” Yelena said. “See if Tiffany was near the office on that day.” Kate nodded and typed away. The silence was tense. Finally, she moved the laptop to show the screen.
“Looks like Tiffany picked you guys up that day,” Sure enough, Tiffany walked into the office, and when she left, the twins were with her. She had no bag with her to hide the note.
“If she’s involved, she wouldn’t drop it off; it would be suspicious,” Billy said. “Can your system do a wider search? See if she met with anyone before picking us up.” Yelena and Kate looked at each other rather than at Billy. “Why? I read a lot of mystery books,” he shrugged.
“Nerd,” Tommy mumbled. Kate turned her laptop around again and began to search. It took longer than the first time, but Yelena caught it when Kate found something. Her eyebrows pinched together. It happened when she was working on something she didn’t understand. “What is it?” Slowly, Kate turned her laptop again.
The screen showed Tiffany meeting with a food delivery boy in an alley. Yelena recognized the logo as a regular spot from which the office ordered. There was no audio, but clear as day, Tiffany handed the man an envelope. She wore gloves so her fingerprints wouldn’t be on it. The man took it along with the stack of cash.
“Well,” Kate said. “That’s suspicious.”
“We were right,” Billy spoke slowly, trying to understand it.
“We were right,” Tommy repeated after his brother. “We were right!” They jumped up and down, chanting, ‘We were right.’ “Ooo,” Tommy cringed suddenly. “I don’t like that we were right.” Yelena chuckled and ruffled the boy’s hair.
“What is going on?” Wanda asked, walking down the stairs. The noise must have woke her up.
“Mom!” Billy yelled and ran over to her. He crashed into her and almost sent her flying back. “Get dressed! Get dressed! We have to hurry and go to SHIELD. We found information for the case!” Billy was shaking his mother from excitement.
“Billy-” Wanda sighed.
“It’s true,” Yelena stood up from the couch. The woman looked at Yelena, confused. Hell, Yelena was lost herself. Just moments ago, Maria was here and told them they had no leads. “I also would call Vision and tell him to meet us there. This may get messy.”
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Natasha was stuck on how to feel. On the one hand, you were free from the claws your parents had within you. On the other hand, your parents were murdered, and she was worried about how you would take that. No matter how often they hurt you, you were desperate for their love. She sat at Maria’s desk while she waited for Alexei and Melina. Legally, you were emancipated, but Alexei and Melina were listed as your emergency contacts on everything. Maria was going over the process of how to release your parents’ bodies.
The pictures on her friend’s desk were limited, but they were of important moments. One was at Maria’s graduation at the academy; you and Natasha were on either side of her. Another one was at the grand opening of your new company building. The picture was taken two seconds before Yelena sprayed the three of you with a bottle of champagne. It seemed the three of you were attached at the hip. Always helping one another, always celebrating with each other.
She glanced at her side to see Fury sit down next to her. “Are you here to yell at me too?” Natasha asked. Melina gave her a stern talk about how she spoke to Maria. She had enough quilt about it. The man shook his head. That was a relief. “How are you, Nick?” She asked him. Fury took the picture of you, Maria, Natasha, and Yelena in his hand. It was after you, Natasha, and Yelena signed a massive deal for the company. Maria took you all out to dinner and drinks after.
“Ready for all of this to be over,” Natasha learned early on that every word the man said was purposeful. He made sure not to mention you because he wasn’t sure how this would end. Natasha heard the distinct sound of her parents walking over to her. They tried to mask their true feelings, but their eyes gave them away. It was common for her family. No matter how much they tried to mask, it was impossible to hide. They were upset. Even though they hated what you had to endure at the hands of your parents, life was still lost.
“Ready to go home?” Melina asked. Natasha nodded. She was tired, but she had work to do. Yelena was meeting with Tony, and she needed to get an update on how that went.
Natasha stood up and pulled Maria into another hug. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I know I hurt you.” She felt Maria exhale slowly and pat her on the back.
“It’s okay,” it wasn’t, but Natasha knew Maria was dealing with a lot. She offered her friend one final squeeze and let her go. Her family took a few steps towards the door, accommodated by Maria, when Natasha heard running approaching them.
“I found her!” Darcy exclaimed. A simple three-word sentence made Natasha’s stomach flip. “I found her!” The scientist repeated and pushed a file into Maria’s hand. “When Strange was preparing the bodies, he found a clear and sticky substance on their forearms,” she took a few deep breaths, trying to calm herself down. “I ran it through the mass spectrometer and got a hit,” she opened the file for Maria. “It’s called Cronium, a compound that absorbs and stores kinetic energy. Honestly, it’s amazing stuff-”
“The point?” Maria cut her off before a tangent could form.
“Right, sorry,” she began to smile. “This substance was produced in one factory that happened to be shut down in Staten Island. It’s called-”
“Nova Forge Industries,” Natasha gave herself whiplash on how fast she turned towards the sound of Kate’s voice. She was standing there with her Bishop Security laptop and wasn’t alone. Yelena, Wanda, the twins, and Vision were running to catch up with her. What was happening?
“Yes,” Darcy titled her head slightly. “How did you know that?”
“We found her too,” Natasha said, sure her heart was going to combust with how fast it was beating. “Do you have somewhere I can plug this in, too?” She smiled and held up her laptop. “You guys aren’t going to believe this.”
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Kate was right. Wanda couldn’t believe it, and neither could everyone else as she explained what she had found. With her and the twin’s help, the missing piece of the puzzle was found, and Wanda saw hope in Maria’s eyes. It was a whirlwind around Wanda as Maria called the agents to assemble a plan and gather a team where you held. Somehow, in the chaos, she found Vision sitting by himself. Wanda sighed and sat next to him. “You know I was planning on breaking it off,” he glanced at Wanda, then looked forward. “I know the boys, and you never liked her.” Wanda smiled sadly.
“Why did you stay with her then?” Vision sighed.
“It felt less lonely with her, especially when the boys were with you.” The man shrugged. “I approach you for advocating for me,” Wanda knew Vision wasn’t involved in this mess when Maria started to question him. Even if he hated you, the boys loved you too much for him to get involved in a plot to cause you harm.
“I think you’ve been through enough. If I could help you avoid an interrogation with a pissed-off Fury, I’ll play my part,” the man laughed as the twins walked over. They looked guilty. Wanda found them looking like this if they got in trouble at school or broke something in the house. “What’s wrong, boys?” Without a word, they hugged Vision. Their father wasn’t expecting the sudden hug, but Wanda watched the man sag in relief against them.
“We’re sorry, Dad,” Billy mumbled. Vision ended the hug to look at them.
“Why are you apologizing?” He asked.
“Because of us, Tiffany is going to be in a lot of trouble,” Tommy added. Wanda’s heart broke for them. They expected Vision to be mad at them.
“Oh, boys. We all would have found out sooner rather than later,” they still looked upset. “But I am so proud of you,” their faces lit up.
“You are?” Billy questioned.
“Of course I am!” He grabbed onto their forearms. “You both played an important part in the investigation and because of your intuition, they will bring her home.” Tommy looked at Wanda for confirmation. His eyes light up like a Christmas tree.
“She’s coming home?” Wanda nodded and took his hand.
“Yes, baby,” she smiled. “She’s coming home.”
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
It was the door almost flying off the hinges that forced you awake. It was hard to sleep in a chair you were chained to. Pierce was seething. His face was red, and smoke was coming out of his ears. “Tell her,” he said. More people filed into the room behind her. “Tell her what you told me.” Sleep still fogged your brain, but you made out Fury’s voice on the other end of the phone.
“Deal is off, Pierce. SHIELD does not negotiate with terrorists,” Good, you thought. You couldn’t imagine the lives lost if they complied. You hoped Wanda and Natasha could forgive them one day.
“I’ll kill her,” Pierce threatened. “Her head will show up at your front door.”
“I know,” Fury said. You heard the slight hitch in his voice. “And I hope she can forgive me. Maybe in the next life, we’ll meet at the lighthouse.” You kept your face calm even when your heart skipped.
“I’ll be waiting, Nick,” you whispered. Pierce hung up before he could respond. Suddenly, you were lifted from the chair and suspended in the air by chains.
“I’m going to enjoy this,” Pierce laughed. The lighthouse wasn’t a real place. It was a code word you and Fury made up. If you ever felt unsafe or needed to leave somewhere, you would text him lighthouse, and he would come. Only you and him knew the meaning behind the word. He was coming to save you. SHIELD knew where you were -all you had to do was survive
You felt the first hit to your ribs, then the second and the third. When the fourth hit came, you felt nothing. You dissociated, a trick you hadn’t done in years. When you were younger, your parents fought, and you hid away in your room. You were small for your age, so you’d hide underneath your bed and dream and float away. When you came back, the fight was over, and you’d climb out like nothing happened.
Float away. Float away. Dream and float away.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
“Faster, faster,” Tommy’s cheers made you run faster. Even though Wanda was going to yell at you for it being dangerous, you had a hard time saying no to the twins. You said yes right away when Tommy begged you to take him outside to play in the snow. You fished out the slid from storage and tied a robe to it. You pulled Tommy up and down the hill, and you were exhausted, but the sound of his laughter fueled you with energy.
“Children,” you stopped at the sound of Wanda’s voice. “Lunch is ready, and there is a hot chocolate.” Tommy jumped off the slide behind you. Wanda pushed her son away before he could get wet from the snow. You chuckled at their antics and walked over to your fiance.
“Do I get a kiss?” You asked, standing in front of her.
“Do you promise me you won’t get me wet?” You smirked at her but kept the suggestive comment to yourself. You had guests within hearing distance. Wordless, you nodded and quickly kissed her. Her lips were warm against yours. “You are cold,” she shivered. “Go get warm.”
“Aye, aye, captain,” you kissed her again and untied your boots to enter the cabin. The cabin was busy. A fire was roaring, and Christmas music was lightly playing. Billy was showing off his new game to Shuri and Kate. Natasha and Yelena were at the bar making Holiday cocktails - you knew it was terrible for them to make the drinks. Melina was in the kitchen, and you were pretty sure Alexei was with Steve and Bucky out front to see who could cut firewood the fastest. It was already so busy, but more people were on their way.
You quickly changed out of your winter clothes and hung them up to dry. Wanda yelled at you yesterday for leaving them on the ground. You were fixing your sweater while you exited your bedroom when a body ran into you. “There she is!” Maria lifted you by the waist and spun you around. “Can’t believe you finally grew a pair and got down on one knee.” Finally, she put you down, and you punched her in the stomach.
“You’re a dick,” you said and ignored her groan in pain. Natasha walked over to you and forced a drink in your hand.
“Don’t be a stick in the mud,” she squeezed your cheek. “We are celebrating you.” You groaned and pushed them away to find Wanda. She was in the kitchen with Pepper. You wrapped your arms around her and pulled you flush to your chest.
“Tasha and Ria are being mean to me,” you mumbled. Wanda looked over her shoulder with a fond smile on her face.
“My poor baby,” she cooed. “Do you want me to yell at them?” You nodded and buried your face in the crook of her neck. You stayed attached to her back while she finished her conversation with Pepper. You only let her go when she forced a plate into your hand.
You sat next to Fury, who was sipping on a small glass of whiskey. “It feels like old times,” you said to the man. “With everyone together.” The man nodded. You took a few bites of food but stopped and looked at him. “This is real, right, or is this all in my head?” Fury gave you a half smile.
“Not sure why it can’t be both,” you frowned at him, unsure what he meant. “This is all you want, right, kid? Your family together,” you nodded. “Then maybe this is a future you haven’t seen yet.”
“And I will see all of this one day,” the man shrugged and finished his drink.
“I guess that depends on you,” he stood up and fixed his coat. Are you strong enough to wait for us?” He left alone. Everything began to slow down and blur. Your family moved around you, but you couldn’t hear what they were saying. You were strong. You could withstand anything if it meant seeing them all again.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Soft hands cradled your face, and you repeatedly heard someone call your name. Your eyes fluttered open. “Ria,” you whispered. Your friend laughed, eyes glossing over with tears.
“Good, Pierce didn’t kill you before I got a chance to slap you around,” you saw Steve come in with metal cutters. Once he cut the metal chains, you fell into Maria. “To be fair, you have a list of people that are pissed at you.”
“Unbelievable,” you scuffed. “I get kidnapped, and people are mad at me.” You felt Maria’s lips on your forehead.
“Let’s get you home, bean.”
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
You heard movement next to you that caused you to wake up. Opening your eyes, it took a minute for your brain to connect the dots. They found you. You were safe in what looked like to be in a hospital with a SHIELD agent standing outside your door. “Sorry, kid, didn’t mean to wake you,” you turned your head to see Fury sitting next to you. “I figured this would be my only time to see you before the room was filled.” You smiled.
“I’m a popular girl; what can I say?” The man rolled his good eye at you. “You found me, pops,” you whispered, taking his hand. “I knew you would.” Fury shook his head.
“It’s my fault you were dragged into this mess.”
“You were doing your job, Nick. I would never be angry at you for that,” it was bad luck mixed with how greedy your parents were. “Pierce had my parents killed.” The man nodded.
“We found their bodies. One of the ways we found you,” he gave you a pained smile. “I am sorry,” you shrugged, unsure how to feel about their death. All the people in your life hated them. You knew the man next to you had strong feelings for them.
“It feels like I mourned their death years ago,” you admitted. “But watching it happen in front of me,” you sighed. “Fucking sucks.” Fury chuckled.
“Frankly, your parents were,” he paused. “Complicated people,” you chuckled and shook your head. “But as someone who has witnessed the death of people they care about. I wish you hadn’t seen that.” You fought back the tears and cleared your throat.
“It gets better, right?” You asked even though you were afraid of the answer. Fury nodded.
“Surround yourself with good people, and you’ve already done that, so that is half the battle,” he said, standing up and, to your surprise, kissing the side of your head. “I am so proud of you, kid.”
When you woke up again, Fury was gone, and Wanda was in the chair he was in. Your hand was in hers, and your eyes locked in on the ring on her finger. The ring you bought must have fallen out of our pocket when Pierce’s guys grabbed you. It slipped your mind that you had it when you went to pick up the twins. “This is not how I wanted to ask you,” she jumped from your voice. “I wanted it to be special, this grand gesture with the boys.” She laughed and squeezed your hand.
“How often do I tell you I don’t want big gestures or fancy gifts? I only want you,” she said. She chose you, not the money or the privilege that came with your job—just you.
“You’ll probably have to remind me a few times,” you smiled. Her green eyes, which you loved so much, began to fill with tears, and her lips started to shake. “Come here, baby,” she stood up from her chair and cradled your face. Her eyes scanned over your injuries. You felt her tears on your skin. “Baby, I’m okay. I’m okay,” you put your hand behind her head and pushed it to your shoulder. “Sh, it’s okay. I’m right here,” you felt her nod. “I’m right here,” you cooed over her quiet cries, and then you heard her mumble something. “What was that?” She pulled away to look at you, sitting in the corner of the bed.
“Ask me,” it took a moment to figure out what she meant, but you smiled.
“I love you, Wanda Maximoff. You are the love of my life and the best thing to ever happen to me,” more tears started to fall down her cheeks. “I can not imagine a world without you, Billy, and Tommy not in it. So, will you marry me?”
“Yes,” she whispered. Yes, yes!” She connected your lips together. This kiss was salty from her tears, but you missed the feeling of her lips against yours. You desperately wanted to deepen the kiss, but you were recovering from your injuries and in a hospital. Someone cleared their throat, and Wanda pulled away. She giggled at the pout on your face.
“I apologize for interrupting,” of course, it was Vision being a cock block. He smirked at the two of you. “But I have two kids that want to see you,” you smiled, and Wanda sat down, her hand still tight in yours.
“Yeah, they can come in.” Vision took a step to the side and the twins came running to your free side. They spoke a million miles a minute, even when Wanda told them to take deep breaths. But they were so excited to see you, you didn’t care you couldn’t understand them. You were grateful you were able to see them again.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
You were a little tired. The ceremony was over, you danced with Wanda, Alexei, and Fury, and now your guests enjoyed the food and music. You sat at the sweetheart’s table while looking around the area. Clint’s kids were dancing with Alexei, Tommy and Billy were helping Morgan get food, and even Vision talked with Carol. This group was your family- this crazy, chaotic bunch. You smiled as Natasha tried to stop Yelena from getting more alcohol. You almost missed this; it was nearly taken from you.
Your time with HYDRA happened two years ago. In those years, you overcame the physical injuries, struggled with the mental ones, and took your company to new heights. Wanda quit her job at the diner and moved into your house. You even promoted Yelena to co-CEO. Everyone spoke highly about her when everything was going on. So you had more time to spend with Wanda and the twins. Life was going good. “Where’s the new wife?” Melina asked, taking her spot.
“Changing,” you sipped on your drink. Maria and Kate helped her get out of her dress and into a jumpsuit. “Are you enjoying the day?” The woman rolled her eyes.
“I feel as if I should be asking you that,” you chuckled and took another sip. You weren’t 100% sure what was in it, as Natasha made it. “Are you having a good day?” You nodded.
“I am,” you answered simply, and she waited for you to continue. “I’m just taking all this in,” you smiled at her. “All of this was almost taken from me.” Melina nodded.
“Do you remember the first time we met?” Of course, you remembered. It was your father’s weekend per the custody agreement. The man was drunk on the couch, and you snuck out of the house. In your defense, you thought the house was empty. You’ve been watching it all day; no one left or entered. You were bored, so you climbed over their fence and opened the window to their living room. You weren’t expecting to come face to face with a hunting rifle and a woman holding it.
You thought she was going to kill you or, worse, call the cops and have you arrested. Oddly enough, she put the gun down and offered you food. It was a warm meal you ate all week. You devoured it, and your neighbor thought you were going to choke. After you finished, she let you leave out the front door, and if you needed anything, you could come to her door and not the window.
The next weekend, you were at your father’s; you spent it with the Romanoffs instead. It was the happiest you’ve been. “I told Wanda that story, and she said she was surprised you didn’t shoot me,” the woman chuckled.
“I was surprised you dared to break into my home,” you smiled. You weren’t going to take anything. At your age, you liked to do stupid things to prove that you could do it. The woman took your hand. “You have done a lot of growing, but you will always be my little petard (firecracker). You found your family. I am so proud.”
“I always had a family—you, Alexei, Natasha, and Yelena. It just got a little bigger because of you. " You could never thank them enough. You paid off their house, got rid of Yelena’s student debt, and bought Alexei and Melina a new car. Still, it never felt like enough. “Thank you, mama.”
Your wedding wasn’t traditional. Wanda walked down the aisle, and the twins handed her off before taking their seat next to Vision. Alexei and Melina walked you down. Fury married you and Wanda. Melina smiled and kissed your cheek. You heard footsteps walking over to you. “Hi, Melina,” Wanda said. Oh, please keep sitting,” she added as the woman stood up from her spot.
“It is fine,” Melina smiled. “I have to remind Alexei that there is a drink limit.” You tilt your head to the side and look at Wanda.
“We didn’t put a drink limit,” you said.
“He has one, and I set it,” you laughed as Melina walked over to Wanda. She gave her a hug and whispered something in her ear. Your wife nodded, and Melina kissed her cheek and walked over to Alexei. Wanda sat back down in her seat, and you immediately kissed her.
“I missed you,” you mumbled against her lips. Wanda laughed and shook her head.
“I was gone for more than 10 minutes,” you pouted.
“So sorry I missed my wife,” her cheeks blushed. Wanda was your wife. You’d never get tired of calling her that. “What did Melina say to you?” She took your drink and sipped on it.
“That’s disgusting,” she cringed. “Natasha made that for you, didn’t she?” you nodded and smiled when you took another sip. “I guess I’ll have to thank her later,” she winked at you, and it was your turn for your body to heat up. You pinched her side. “Melina told me to make sure I keep your heart good,” you glanced at the woman who smiled at you. You took Wanda’s hand and kissed the ring on her finger.
“I love you,” you said. “You are one of the reasons my heart is good and why I want to keep it good.”
“You are,” Wanda paused, and you waited for her to gather her words. Unbelievable. I thank my lucky stars that I ran into you at the coffee shop. " You laughed and kissed the ring again. Footsteps rapidly ran over to the table.
“You promised you’d play a round of corn hole with us,” Tommy said. You playfully rolled your eyes.
“We have to play before you get too drunk!” Billy added on with a smile. Your jaw dropped, and Wanda covered your mouth as she laughed.
“Who says I’m getting drunk?” Billy rolled his eyes.
“1, it’s your wedding.”
“And 2,” Tommy wrapped his arms around your neck. “We saw Natasha make that drink. I’ll be surprised if you’ll be standing when you are done with it.” His laughter hurt your ears, but it was a sound you loved.
“You little shit,” you said and stood up. You were able to maneuver Tommy onto your shoulder. The boys’ laughter continued as you walked over to the small area where you had lawn games.
“Dad claimed you to be on his team, which I find very unfair,” you dropped Tommy back onto his feet. He shook his head.
“We’ll take turns,” you ruffled Tommy’s hair, and he ran over to Vision. Billy stood by your side. “Are you having fun so far?” you asked him. He nodded, but you saw that he was in deep thought. “What is it, bud?” Suddenly, his body slammed into yours for a hug.
“I’m glad you are part of our family,” he whispered. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” you said, and Billy ran to the empty corn hold board. Once upon a time, you dreamed of a family like this. Now you had it, and you would not let it go.
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sukunasweetheart · 8 months ago
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I was rereading some of your fics and got inspired so please hear me out🙏
Reader being college!sukunas pretty little gf but going through a bit of a insecure phase. Having to wonder if sukuna using her for her body. While also having to endure people trying to flirt with him at every party (sukuna has never and would never flirt or cheat but since reader is going through something, she's obviously bothered)
This continues for a few weeks, reader brings it up but sukuna always gets annoyed and shuts it down(Sukuna and reader both not knowing how to efficiently communicate). Reader's insecurity is kind of building up😕 so atp shes debating whether to break up with him because shes just so tired of feeling like she's not enough.
One night reader gets drunk during a night out with maki and nobara so they have to call him to go pick her up. Sukunas kind of mad since she hasn't called or texted him all day so he calls her out on it while driving home. Reader being a emotional drunk decides its the perfect time to unleash how she feels. Sukuna listens to her and starts worrying when reader very briefly mentions a break up. So when they get home sukuna gets her to spill the beans before she knocks out. Meanwhile sukuna spends all night thinking about how to reassure reader that he loves her (he doesn't want to lose her😭)
Next morning reader wakes up in his arms and he tells her he wants to talk about what happened last night now that shes sober. So they have a serious talk about it (tears were definitely shed)
Edit: THIS WRITING WAS GNARLY IM SO SORRY😭i had a vision but i couldn't put it into words correctly. i gave up near the end but i kind of just wanted to hear your thoughts😖
AWWWW THIS IS SO ADORABLE FR
i love the angst and happy ending, always 😘😘😘 it hurts so good </3 just them being so unsure of each other and what to do, even if its clear that they both are so deeply in love <3
very relevant angst bc someone like sukuna would find it very difficult to understand what it feels to be insecure... it makes you wonder how much patience he could have for someone who is intensely insecure (me)
anyway i can imagine drunk reader being a sobbing, bumbling mess when shes at home with him, talking in a way thats barely comprehensible, weeping in between sentences and sukuna just not knowing what to do with you except wipe your tears away (he'd call you cute if you weren't actually so upset) but then you mention that maybe its better off if the two of you break up, which wipes the smile off his face
imagine him wracking his brains at night while he observes your sleeping face, not knowing what to do... he'd never thought that what he was doing now wasn't enough in making you feel secure with him and that he was making you so unhappy
maybe what you need is more verbal affirmation, bc sukuna is so action oriented, he realises he doesn't nearly as often tell you that he loves you and only uses gestures to show it instead.
idk this might be corny but imagine you and him practicing saying 'i love you' while sitting face to face, holding hands, and for the first time you see his ears get pink, its certainly not something he says often. you bursting into laughter at the stiff way he says it makes him even more bashful.
"stop fucking laughing! it's your turn now, hurry up."
but when you say it, it sounds so natural and genuine and sweet, even when you're saying it in between laughs. it makes him wonder how you're doing it.
anyway, seeing sukuna's ears get so pink and seeing how awkward he is for a change, is strangely healing to you and probably helps you gain some confidence back bc who else could incur such feelings in him other than you?? especially when he usually has such an idgaf attitude :)
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poisonlove · 1 year ago
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lorraine smut? but lorraine is the one giving and is dominant
I try it :(
Shut up | Lorraine day
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Under the relentless Texas sun, each day on Uncle Howard's farm became a challenge. The high temperature turned every drop of sweat into a tribute to hard work, while the arid ground beneath my feet made every step a struggle against the toughness of the earth.
On that farm, under Uncle Howard's stern yet understanding gaze, I worked to earn a few bucks. It was my ticket to a different future, far from the arid plains of Texas. New York represented my ambition, the place where I hoped to forge my fortune. So, with sweat on my forehead as a constant companion, I toiled in the hope of one day crossing the horizon to new opportunities.
"How are you doing, y/n?" someone suddenly asks.
I stopped feeding the chickens, turning to see Uncle Howard looking at me seriously. "I'm done..." I reply with a small smile, tossing a handful of corn into the chicken coop.
"Good, because you need to plow the soil for the harvest," he quickly says before leaving the farm.
"I know, J." I glance at my horse, watching me with curiosity from its enclosure. "It's more acidic than usual," I sigh wearily.
I walk over to J, placing my hand on his mane, making him neigh with happiness. "See you later," I mumble distractedly before patting his back and moving away from the farm. The sun beats against my face, and I try to shield myself by raising a hand over my eyes. The heat of the day begins to make itself felt.
The abrupt noise of a vehicle stopping on the ground catches my attention. I turn slowly to see who has arrived, curious to discover what could disrupt the tranquility of the day on Uncle Howard's farm.
A red van appears in my field of vision, and with confusion, I see who's inside. A guy in a white shirt and a cowboy hat jumps out, smiling widely. I furrow my brows as I watch him help a girl down, offering her his hand. Four more guys emerge from the back of the van, their figures still unclear under the blinding sun. My curiosity grows, trying to discern who they are and what has brought them so suddenly to our farm.
"Hey! You!" I shout, determined to capture their attention.
The cowboy guy looks at me with confusion, but his open smile doesn't seem worried at all. "This is a private residence," I assert seriously, scrutinizing the others out of the corner of my eye.
"Calm down, beauty." The cowboy guy takes off his sunglasses, smiling even more. "I'm Wayne," he says, grinning. I raise an eyebrow, confused.
"I don't care who you are, just go away," I say venomously, noticing how one of his friends sizes me up and down.
"Calm down, sweetheart." A blonde approaches slowly, smiling seductively. "We rented this place," she adds, biting her lower lip with a seductive manner. "If you're interested, you can shoot some scenes with us," she timidly suggests.
"Scenes?" I look closely at the group, noticing a camera in the hands of a guy with glasses. The way they flirt... the realization makes me blush violently.
"Bobby, that doesn't seem appropriate," another female voice intervenes. My eyes scan with curiosity over the figure of a girl behind the guy with glasses. I am surprised to see a beautiful girl with brown eyes, a dazzling smile, and an innocent aura. She seemed almost embarrassed.
"Always the same party pooper," the blonde murmurs weakly.
"I'm R.J.," says the guy with glasses, embarrassed. "She's Lorraine, my girlfriend," he adds with a smile. I blink slightly, incredulous that such a charming girl is with RJ.
"I know, I had the same reaction," the other guy in the group, Jackson, intervenes, smiling genuinely.
"Maxine," says the girl next to the cowboy, smiling shyly.
My eyes linger on Lorraine, admiring her beauty with brown eyes and the innocent smile that seemed to contrast with the situation. Her presence, somehow, added a touch of mystery to the whole situation. The tension in the air thickens as I try to understand the reason for this unexpected intrusion into Uncle Howard's quiet farm.
My heart was pounding as I watched the scene. Howard arrives with a rifle in hand, a stern look aimed at RJ.
"What's going on here?" the old man asks venomously, keeping the rifle pointed at RJ.
"Hey, calm down." Wayne raises his hands and moves slowly toward my uncle. "I'm Wayne; we talked on the phone about renting this place," the guy says determinedly.
My uncle analyzes his words before lowering the rifle. "All right... then follow me," he says calmly. "Y/n, you keep doing your work and then go feed the cows," he adds, turning and walking away.
As the six friends follow my uncle, Lorraine turns and looks at me with curiosity, giving me a shy smile. The tension in the air dissipates, but her mysterious presence and attentive gaze leave an indelible mark on my ordinary day on the farm.
(…)
"Can you explain why you don't want to eat?" I ask with exasperation to the cow.
I was so exhausted that I desperately wanted to sleep, but Mrs. Cow here didn't want to eat. It might be something minor, I know, but if the cow doesn't eat tomorrow, we won't have milk, and my uncle will be angry.
"Please... can't you see how good it is?" I smile nervously as I shake a handful of hay in my hands. I sigh as Mary looks at me with boredom.
"You know... I think she's not hungry," someone intervenes playfully.
I turn towards the farm entrance and smile, seeing Lorraine walking towards my direction. There's something about her that irresistibly attracts me, and I don't know what it is – maybe it's the fact that she's extremely sexy and innocent at the same time.
"Oh... hi," my cheeks flush, and I lean against the fence of the pen. "Hi," Lorraine says with a small smile on her lips.
With the corner of my eye, I see the girl leaning next to me.
"And the others?" I ask curiously, and Lorraine lights a cigarette, pulling and inhaling the smoke with her eyes closed. "We've finished shooting; now they're either drinking or doing their thing... well, except for R.J.," she says indifferently, taking another drag of the cigarette.
"You know..." I start as I watch the other cows walking slowly, "I would have never thought that someone like you would do an adult film," I say embarrassedly, blushing faintly.
Lorraine looks at me with blushing cheeks and drops the cigarette to the ground, extinguishing it with the tip of her foot.
"I actually knew nothing... about these films," she begins with a low tone, smiling shyly. "And what do you mean by someone like you?" she asks with a raised eyebrow.
I open my mouth trying to say something that isn't stupid, and Lorraine takes the hay from my hands.
"I mean... you have such an innocent aura..." I start embarrassingly. Lorraine smiles sweetly at the cow, which slowly approaches the fence, sniffing what she has in her hands. "Let's say you look like the perfect cover of a church girl," I say curiously as I watch Mary start chewing on the hay Lorraine gave her.
"Mary!" I say with a falsely mournful tone, and Lorraine chuckles softly.
"Anyway, I came to help my boyfriend R.J.," she says smiling at Mary. I raise my eyebrows at her comment. "I see," I say timidly.
"And anyway, I could handle shooting a scene," she says with confidence. "I didn't say that," I respond amused and move away from the fence. I put my hands in my jeans' pockets and walk near some hay, sitting on it.
"Because I've already done something with R.J.," she says, raising her chin with superiority. Lorraine follows suit and sits beside me, settling into the hay.
"You don't seem very satisfied," I notice, and I start playing with some hay, wanting to keep my fingers busy. "Let's say it's something that gives more pleasure to him than to me," Lorraine shrugs nonchalantly, and I look at her out of the corner of my eye.
"He's a nice person; he helped me settle into university..." Lorraine confesses, lying down in the hay, looking at the ceiling.
I follow her example and turn towards her direction, seeing how some strands of hair are mixed with the hay. Her eyes sparkle, and she looks at me with curiosity. "But you don't love him, right?" I finish her sentence, and she nods slowly.
"I don't want to hurt him..." she continues, and I remain silent at her response. "Anyway, I think you could find someone who can make you enjoy," I say absentmindedly, and Lorraine smiles sweetly, giving me a light push on the side. "And are you talking about yourself?" she says playfully, and I look at her without blinking.
Lorraine stops smiling, seeing my seriousness, and leans towards my face, making my heartbeat faster. "I need someone who can endure my desire," she says in a low voice, expressing her lust.
Her eyes lock with mine, and the sparks between us intensify.
Our lips meet with desire, a palpable tension in the air. I delicately entwine my fingers around her neck, gently pulling her towards me. Initially, Lorraine stiffens, but as seconds pass, I feel her hesitation melt away. Her lips, initially shy, respond to the mutual need, creating a fusion of intensely charged emotions. The kiss becomes a silent dialogue, a blend of desires and feelings expressed through the intimate touch of our mouths.
The brunette straddles my legs and leans towards my neck, kissing it with lust. "Raine..." I say with ragged breath, and the girl moves away to look at me attentively.
Her eyes are hooded, and her lips are semi-open due to heavy breathing, her hair tousled and infused with hay.
Without saying anything, I kiss Lorraine and take her hand, making her glide along my body, slipping it directly between my underwear. Lorraine sighs loudly against my mouth, feeling the moisture between my folds, and intensifies the kiss.
"Don't hold back..." I say breathlessly. "Quench this fire," I say, smiling widely. My mouth opens wide as I feel two fingers inside me, and I spread my legs instinctively. Lorraine settles between my legs and looks at me serenely. "You're really... wet," she murmurs with a husky voice, going deeper with her fingers.
I moan in response.
Lorraine bites into my neck and begins to penetrate me at her leisure, increasing and decreasing the speed according to her desires. "No... not like this," she says breathlessly, quickly pulling away from my body.
My eyes look at the girl with confusion before smiling, seeing how she takes off her panties with the dress. I sigh loudly seeing her curves, her small breasts compensated by the magnificence of her body, soft and smooth skin.
"Calm down" I say chuckling weakly, feeling Lorraine forcefully removing my pants, exposing my warm center.
"Shut up," she says agitatedly, "I'm so frustrated..." she mutters through her teeth. My eyes watch Lorraine's movements carefully, seeing her opening my legs and searching for a better position for both of us.
Both of us release a moan as our sensitive centers rub against each other, our fluids mixing as if they were one.
"To hell with everything..." she says weakly, sighing loudly as she starts moving her hips back and forth. My hands end up on the sides of her body; the nails scratch her back with every movement.
"Mmmh..." Lorraine moans loudly, increasing the speed of her hips. The moans become louder, and the sound of our bodies in symbiosis increases at the same pace. "Raine, I..." I mumble absentmindedly, closing my eyes for a moment.
The pleasure, placing a hand around my neck, "Look at me, damn it," she says through her teeth, moaning and moving faster and faster. "Raine, I..." I mumble almost crying for pleasure, and the brunette releases the grip on my neck, opening her mouth in ecstasy and letting herself be carried away by the orgasm she just reached.
The sight made me come forcefully.
Lorraine slumps against my body, trying to catch her breath. "Is that all?" I ask with a smile on my lips. "Is this the level of endurance?" I inquire with curiosity, and Lorraine licks her lips with mischief.
"Oh no, we've just begun," she says with a husky voice, and I smile nervously, concerned about her words.
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effwon · 6 months ago
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'cause i don't think that they'd understand || ln4 x reader (Part 2/2)
Summary: Lando just wants to walk down to the garage before the Miami race with you by his side. George and Carmen walked in together, Alex and Lily walked in together, so why can't you, as well? Despite your self-consciousness, you agree to walk hand-in-hand with him down to the garage right before the big race, but it's a much harder ask for you than anyone could ever realize.
PART ONE HERE
Plus-size (she/her) Reader x Lando Norris
Warnings: Brief mentions of nausea/being sick, panic, reader is plus-sized and very down on herself about it, weight mentions, ect.
Characters: Lando Norris (your boyfriend) and feat Oscar Piastri as a last minute saving grace for you.
Rating: G.
Tags: @cthgee @hellof-1 @notpeachybby
Notes: Thank you for the feedback on part 1! Feedback is what keeps a writer writing, after all! I started this as an experiment and genuinely did not expect the love that would come with it. I put together a part 2 on the fly (I hadn't planned to write it, actually, I didn't think the response would be this high) and am happy to put this to rest now, to work on some other reader fics. I'm happy to entertain requests, just know that smut is not something I will write in detail (I know, that's what most of you want, I'm sorry). Thank you for the support!
Your eyes flutter open and all you can see above you is a blur of light orange and a bright light. A soft groan escapes the back of your throat, and you turn your head to the side to try and keep the light out of your eyes. Your head is swimming, like there’s a pressure pushing against your brain that you can feel as far as the back of your eyes as well. You are laying on something warm and soft, but most definitely alive - if the gentle shuffling beneath you is anything to go by, anyway.
You furrow your brows as you hum out another soft, confused sound. Very slowly, you try to sit up, but someone’s hand presses against your shoulder and applies a little force, enough to keep you from moving in your hazy state.
“Lando?” you ask, your voice soft and unnaturally raspy. Something isn’t quite right. You don’t remember falling asleep - you don’t even really know where you are, but it only makes sense that Lando would be the one with you…right? As you continue to blink your vision back to clarity, a face comes into view above you - one that is very much not Lando. It’s Oscar Piastri, that much your brain can at least piece together. Around him, the walls start to come into view. The ceiling, the toilet, the vanity to your left…
“Not quite, but I promise he’s coming.” Oscar says above you, and you are grateful that he’s barely speaking louder than a whisper. Your head is pounding and your stomach is churning as everything starts to put itself together. You’re only missing a handful of key puzzle pieces, now.
“Oscar?” You mumble, instinctively curling into his warmth for any ounce of comfort you can glean. One of his hands comes up and carefully, thoughtfully brushes stray hair out of your face. You realize he’s attempting to be soothing, as your brain keeps working to figure this out.
“Yep, that one.” he replies, flashing you a smile that seems, in your opinion, quite tense. Right, it’s slowly coming back.
The bathroom - Lando led you to the bathroom at your request, and then left to get himself into his race kit. You were sick, and immediately after vomiting into the sink, a panic attack had taken hold of you. And then –
Your eyes widen slightly in horror. Oscar, right. You had forgotten to lock the door and he - oh, god, he –
“How long was I out?” you ask suddenly, shooting yourself upright in his arms. He blinks back shock, obviously not expecting you to move so quickly, and looks down at his watch for a brief moment.
“Uh, three minutes? It’s not been long.” 
“Jesus,” you gasp, scrambling out of his comforting grip and backing yourself up against the wall. Oscar looks a bit lost, eyes full of concern as he holds his hands out in front of him, fingers splayed. “I’m sorry - oh my god, that’s - I’m sorry.”
“Hey, it’s fine. It’s okay.” he assures you, eerily still as he watches you with a careful gaze. “I’m sorry for touching you without permission. I didn’t want you to hit your head when you fell.”
“That’s not -” you shake your head, feeling your throat tightening with emotion. “No, thank you. That’s not the problem, I promise. I appreciate you.” Anxiety is beginning to swirl in your chest again, but you can feel just how fatigued your body is now. The anxiety, at least, is easier to manage versus pure panic, but it’s making your head spin. 
“It’s okay.” Oscar says again, a bit firmer this time. “I phoned Lando a moment ago, and he’s making his way back right now. I told him I’d stay with you until he got here.”
You nod, relieved to know that Lando would be back for you any moment. You are also grateful for Oscar’s company, regardless of the fact that you hardly know him. Clearly, he’s kind and caring - which doesn’t surprise you, really. Lando hasn’t ever had an off-color thing to say about him.
“Thanks, Oscar. I’m so sorry you had to witness all of-” you swirl your finger around in a circle, searching for the right word, “that. But it means a lot that you didn’t just leave me there.”
“Of course. I don’t know what’s got you so upset, but I hope that you feel better soon, yeah?”
“Yeah. I think it’s a little better already.”
Oscar smiles at you, friendly and kind, and before either of you can utter another word, there’s a frantic knocking at the bathroom door. Oscar’s head snaps back to the door, letting out a small “Oh” as he hops up to his feet and hurries over to unlock the door. Lando’s face comes into view as soon as the door opens, and he looks absolutely distraught. Your chest clenches, knowing that you’re the reason he’s out of sorts, and you lay your head back against the wall.
“When did she wake up? Is she okay? What happened?” you hear Lando ask frantically, firing questions at Oscar before they can be answered. 
Oscar takes it in stride, “She just woke up a moment ago, and she was a bit dazed. She seems okay now, but I don’t know what caused all of this.”
“Thanks, Osc.” Lando breathes, and you can hear the genuine warmth in his tone. “I’ll take it from here, mate.”
There’s a soft ‘click’ as the bathroom door closes, and a slightly louder one as Lando locks the door behind him. His footfalls are quick as he rushes over to you, immediately sliding down the wall to sit next to you on the floor. You look over at him, and your gazes meet for merely a second before he’s wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his chest.
His scent and the warmth of his body is familiar and comforting in ways you couldn’t possibly verbalize. It’s akin to taking a deep, calming breath of air into your lungs and feeling everything inside of you just slow down for a moment. It’s the relief of the familiarity, the delicacy in which he cradles your head against his heart like you’re his most precious thing.
It makes a lump form in your throat. But you are far too tired for tears, now. Too tired for much of anything but this: sitting here on a dirty bathroom floor, cradled in Lando’s arms.
“I thought you were alright when I left,” he says, so very miserably, “why didn’t you tell me you weren’t? I would’ve stayed.”
“I’m sorry.” you murmur, your voice muffled by the fireproof suit over his chest. You can hear his heart beating rapidly, a gentle barrage of distressed thumps against your ear, and it twists something so deeply in your own chest. You properly worried him, which was the exact opposite of what you wanted to do. “I thought I could work through it while you were changing and that things would be okay by the time you got back.”
“Do you want to tell me what happened?” he urges ever so softly, his hand running up and down your back in the most soothing patterns. You can’t help feeling the warmth of relief encompassing you being back in his presence.
It helps the words flow much easier, without stopping to doubt or scrutinize everything that comes out of your mouth. “It was a panic attack, it didn’t really pop up until after I had initially calmed down. It happens like that sometimes.” You explain, focusing on the ever-present beating of his heart beneath your ear. “Or - it happens like that a lot for me, I guess. Once the initial fight or flight wears off, the real panic comes out. It made me sick and, I dunno, I guess Oscar startled me when he came in and before I even really knew it, I went down.”
Lando’s grip tightens on you almost protectively as he registers your explanation. “Just went down? You say it like it’s the most casual thing.” He scoffs, but there’s no mirth or amusement behind it. You can tell he’s still nervous, still trying to process everything. “Oscar said pretty much the same. Blessing and a curse you forgot to lock the door then, huh?”
You laugh breathily at that, nodding your head in agreement. Had Oscar not been there, you surely would’ve hit your head on the tile and that could’ve been a much scarier sight to behold when someone came by to use the restroom later. As embarrassing as it was to break down in front of someone you hardly knew, you were grateful for his willingness to assist. You would have to find him and give him a proper thank you later.
“Yeah, he’s a nice guy.” You agree, nuzzling into his chest even further. If it were up to you, you would simply lay here in his arms all day long and not think a single thing of it - but you are distinctly aware of the time and of his looming race. Something he should be putting his entire focus into, and not on you. “Now shouldn’t you be out there getting ready for the race?” “Probably,” he admits with a chuckle, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of your head. “But I don’t want to leave here until I know for sure you’re alright.”
His thoughtfulness never ceases to amaze you. Perhaps you’d found him to be a bit taught and agitated earlier (and, perhaps, you had deserved that sort of response from him, given your nearly blatant refusal to simply walk across the paddock into the garage with him), but he’s back to his normal warmth and gentleness once more. A relief, you think, in and of itself.
“I’m alright now, really.” you say, lifting your head up from his chest to flash him a soft, sweet little smile. It isn’t a lie, either. Since he’s come back, you’ve felt exponentially better - a result of the panic attack waning and being in the comforting presence of the person you love most in the world. “I’d really like to go see everything else you wanted to show me.”
Lando’s eyes light up in a way that makes your heart skip a beat. He’s always been a bit reactive, with his heart on his sleeve, and you wouldn’t have him any other way if you’re honest. The genuine excitement that sparks on his face is everything you could ever want or need in life. Just to see him happy, it’s enough. It makes every horrible name you call yourself, every fear, every insecurity and every worry melt away into nothing, like it had never even been there to begin with.
“Let’s get some lunch at hospitality first, and then I’ll take you out to see the car afterwards.” He suggests, lifting himself up from the floor and offering you a helpful hand. “I know a little spot we can eat, away from the cameras and all that.”
Even after the hell you’ve put him through today, a soft feeling blossoms in your chest to know he’s still holding you to the forefront of his mind. He’s still looking for ways to make you more comfortable. He’s still loving you, despite your glaring insecurities. You take his hand, skin warm against yours, and lift yourself up onto your feet with his help.
“I think that sounds lovely.” you reply, reaching up and cupping his cheeks in your hands. You stand on the tips of your toes and lean in, pressing a soft, gentle kiss to Lando’s lips. His breath falters for a mere moment, and then he’s kissing you back just as softly, just as gently. As you pull apart, there’s a shy smile on his face that makes your cheeks burn and your chest ignite with adoration. Even if you tried, you do not think you could possibly love him more.
“I think you’re lovely.” He shoots back, a glint of mischief in his eyes. Your cheeks burn even hotter at his remark, and you bury your face into his shoulder to keep the blush from being too obvious. 
“I think you’re going to make me too sick to eat if you keep this up.”
Lando tosses his head back and laughs, genuine and sweet, the sound washes over you with its subtle burst of serotonin - a much needed side effect.
“Fine, fine, I’ll save the ooey-gooey stuff for after the race, then. Just one more quick thing though-” he says, wrapping his arm around your waist as he leans in to press a kiss to your temple. This time, you choose not to shy away from his touch, no matter how big and gaudy your body feels wrapped up in his arms. “I love you.”
Your heart flutters like the wings of a caged bird, yearning to break out of your chest and nestle up tight within his own. You smile, tossing all of the bad thoughts from earlier in the day out of your mind completely. Once again you’ve learned: as long as you have Lando with you, everything really is okay. “I love you, too.”
The news articles do drop early the next morning, from multiple sources, with their rude and hateful headlines about you, your body type, and your worth in regards to Lando’s love. And, just as you expected, each and every one of them hits like a knife to your gut as you see them pop up one after another on your feed.
But, at the end of every single one of these articles is the same quote from Lando - the only quote he offered the reporters on the matter of your relationship during the entire day.
“Quite frankly, I don’t care what anyone thinks of our relationship. It isn’t their business, it’s mine and her’s, and I genuinely think she’s the most beautiful girl in the world. Nothing is going to change that.”
And you just smile.
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yanderecrazysie · 9 months ago
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all your yan cheater tamaki fics r so good what.
if you hav time, could i request another?
Maybe another ending or something from the blind fic, it could be reader moving on and finding someone else and tamaki gets jealous and tries to bring back their marriage
something like that would be rlly nice 🫂
Of course, my precious anon! This is a bit short, but I had writer’s block and was just happy to get out of that block!
Title: Blind (Part 2)
Pairings: Tamaki Suoh x Reader
WARNINGS: Yandere themes, swearing
Summary: You’ve moved on, but Tamaki can’t.
Part 1: here
blind
/verb/
deprive (someone) of understanding, judgment, or perception:
Who is this?
Tamaki took his place in the first booth in the cafe. You liked this place- kind of a mom and pops hang-out that you always took a corner booth at. You would crack open your laptop on the wooden table, settle into the uncomfortable bench, and type away. You would order a drink. A hot one on cool, windy days, a cold one on hot, humid days. You would smile to yourself as you scrolled through websites he could not see. Put in earbuds and watch YouTube videos or anime.
But not today.
Today, you weren’t playing on your laptop alone. No, today there was no laptop in sight. There was a cold drink in front of you (the weather was warm) and a coffee. 
Probably because you weren’t alone.
The guy you were with isn’t as tall as Tamaki, but he has windswept hair and a smile that looks so genuinely happy and carefree. Your arm laid on the table, stretched out towards the male across from you. His hand drew patterns on the back of your hand affectionately as you two talked.
How did he miss this? When and where did you meet this man? Was he another student at Ouran High School? He didn’t recognize him but, then again, he didn’t really pay attention to anyone that didn’t come into music room 3.
He had felt sort of lost ever since disbanding the host club, but he couldn’t bring himself to flirt with other girls anymore. Even when he was faking his affection, he felt like throwing up all over their poofy yellow dresses. 
You were the only girl he had eyes for anymore.
Not that you cared.
Tamaki watched as you tapped your foot to the soft music playing throughout the cafe. He admired your pretty beaded sandals and then let his eyes stray to the ruffled yellow dress that covered your beautiful figure. No jeans or sneakers in sight.
You had dressed up for this guy.
Tamaki’s heart twisted in knots. It was hard to admire you with that bastard sitting across from you. Your breathtaking smile, your unwavering gaze… none of that was meant for the man huddled away at the table near the entrance, spying on an oblivious girl.
You and the male across from you scooted down the bench, swung your legs from under the table, and stood up. Tamaki held his breath, watching the two of you so closely that he forgot to blink. 
Please just be friends or school project partners… Please just be a relative… Please be platonic…
Tamaki’s heart sank lower with every step you took towards this mystery guy. Let it just be a hug…
But life was not on Tamaki’s side. In the moment that you leaned in to lock lips with the other man, he saw a sort of shadow himself kissing another woman. He wondered if your heart shattered into as many pieces as his did.
He felt numb as he stumbled from his chair to the door. “Tamaki?” No- I don’t want her to see me like this.
Tears stung his eyes as he looked back at you with blurry vision. He could barely make out your face, but he imagined you had a victorious smile on your face. Or maybe you didn’t- you were much nicer than he was, after all.
The worst part was he couldn’t even be mad. He didn’t have a right to be. Your parents had canceled the marriage contract.
The marriage contract… Tamaki’s eyes lit up. Your parents had canceled it out of anger, but they had accepted it because of his father’s offer. His father had lowballed, as he often did.
If he offered more… Well, just what price would make your parents get over their daughter’s opinion and see dollar signs?
You’d be upset, sure, and you’d have to give up your new boyfriend. Don’t worry.
I’ll be more than enough for you.
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fairytoge · 9 months ago
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dating headcanons ; k.choso, z.naoya
notes!!
this only took me like,,, four months to complete this 😭 but i hope you enjoy!!
other parts ; n.kento, g.satoru, g.suguruㅤi.yuuji, f.megumiㅤi.toge, o.yuuta
m.list
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k.choso
the loml choso (not including all the other lomls)!!
but anyway!!! choso is an absolute sweetheart, as long as you're not fighting against him in a battle or anything
he 10000% would do pretty much anything and everything to make you happy or to just make you smile
he loves you sm it makes other people cringe... you two are definitelyyy the couple people see in public and slightly grimace at because they're so in love
he'd probably do subtle pda but if you don't like that sort of stuff, he wouldn't do it!! he loves you too much to make you uncomfortable and push your boundaries
he's basically like a typical gentleman?? like when people say that men aren't like how they used to be, choso is their ideal man!!!
summary: he's so in love and whipped for you
but it's vvvvv endearing!!!
i think, as soon as you two begin officially seeing each other, he'll want to introduce you to his brothers and get their opinion on you too
they mean the world to him and he would probably love nothing more than for the people he loves most to also be friends!!
someone help me the older brother issues are realll
but yeah, he's just a sweetheart and would worship you like a god if you asked him to <3 (he does that without you asking 🤭)
choso would also go along with whatever you say 99% of the time!! the 1% off is when it endangers you lmao
if you call him some dumb nickname or do the trend where you call a s/o the most random things, he will genuinely take it as a compliment so seriously that it makes your heart hurt
he's a bitttt naive, but you love him!! and he definitely loves you omg
z.naoya
i hate his personality but he's hot 😔 so!! this is gonna be kind of ooc for him icl
dating naoya issss.... interesting? he's got a unique character for sure
realistically, you probably wouldn't see him that often assuming that he's a full-time sorcerer and you are a housewife (or househusband!!)
but, the times that you do see him, you are both so sappy and touchy with each other, no matter who or what is around
naoya is spoiled, so it doesn't come as a surprise to know that he has always been able to get what he wants, and that nothing has changed since he was a child
with this in mind, he would definitely not be shy about pda, unless you're both in a proper environment like a clan meeting i guess...
he probably wouldn't even let you in there though 😭 his superiority complex is off the charts
pleaseee start training him to not act like a creep
leading on from this!! naoya would treat you like a princess if you're both truly in love, and would stop at nothing to get you what you want!
you mentioned that you would like the garden to be redesigned so that you can plant more flowers? done! the kitchen isn't to your standards? it's gone before you can look at it for another second!
suddenly you understand why he is the way he is, because if this is the life he's been living, it's 100% worth it lmao
i also feel like naoya has tunnel vision for you!!
like, let's say that he's come home from exorcising a curse, or from a particularly hard mission, and being more impolite to the servants than normal as he literally hunts you down in your own home
he lowkey scares you but not in a bad way?? he's just kind of intimidating sometimes, without meaning to be!
overall, naoya would probably be a good s/o to have!! as long as he loves you 😭
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© fairytogeㅤ ꔫㅤ please do not copy, repost, translate, etc without my permission
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throwaway-yandere · 10 months ago
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Ansy maybe I can send an idea about this. Maybe this yandere is turning into a zombie/monster, Reader sacrifices or willingly let's the yandere eat reader so the yandere wouldn't hurt others. Other idea, Yandere is a monster/cannibal and reader has a flesh that is very addicting to eat so yandere feels guilty for eating their darling but can't as darling tastes so delicious.
A/n: I'm actually currently writing the prompt I got earlier so here's some short ideas. also, what's up with me writing cannibalism fics for two older brothers with blue-white color schemes?? *shrug*. I'll go with the 2nd idea-ish (I'll tweak it again) in this one. First time doing headcanons so... I'll adios lol.
Content Tags: hello its yandere cannibalism lmao + Whodunit spoilers
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YANDERE CANNIBAL!SUNDAY who strangely takes too long to respond to his childhood friend's messages. You're starting to get worried that he's spending too much time inside the dreamscape. Although your race greatly differs from his- being an ordinary human resident and all- you heard numerous stories that Halovians tend to carnally seek glamorous feasts after hosting series of events.
YANDERE CANNIBAL!SUNDAY who finally replied to your recent message, telling you "DON'T COME, PLEASE." with bold capital letters. You can only raise an eyebrow, considering you're already on his front door with a fruit basket at hand. In hindsight, perhaps you should've considered giving him a heads-up beforehand instead of rudely announcing your visit. But you are genuinely worried for his overall wellbeing, especially given what happened to his sister.
And perhaps, you were also just looking for someone who could understand your grief as well. He wasn't the only one stripped of their family so suddenly. The thought of your friend starving himself had pushed your own sadness away in favor of sheer platonic worry. That was how strong your bond was.
YANDERE CANNIBAL!SUNDAY who shook, mortified at the knocks on his front door. As much as possible, he can't let you in. The current nightmare he calls "HUNGER" was an unforgiving beast. He leaned against the other side of the closed door, breathing heavily.
"(Y/n), n-now is not the time for a visit! Forgive me for this crudeness, but I shan't open the door at present." You hear him inhale shakily. "To have you see me like this undermines all the work I've put in our... friendship."
You sighed. "Alright, I'm sorry. But... can I please just leave this on your porch?"
"... I will not bar you from doing so..."
"Thank you."
YANDERE CANNIBAL!SUNDAY whose hands refused to stop trembling. You're so close. He can almost taste you behind that door. A chill runs down his spine as he noticed just how much his mouth was watering at the thought of taking a bite.
YANDERE CANNIBAL!SUNDAY who thought himself most detestable for his cravings. The Odes of Harmony preaches honesty among its many virtues, and he would drown himself for omitting the grim truth from you. THEY will not be happy with this relapse of his.
YANDERE CANNIBAL!SUNDAY who bit his thumb, drawing blood. THEY wouldn't endorse this behavior from a representative of the Family.
YANDERE CANNIBAL!SUNDAY who looked at his bleeding finger and laughed sorrowfully at the lingering question on his mind.
Whose blood was it? His... or THEIRS?
Sunday could never be at ease after committing this crime. A Halovian like himself would never allow their vision to be clouded in red, and it appears the devil had saw an opportunity to hurl at two birds with one stone. But that would be an inaccurate way to describe it. His wings had not been clipped; he had brutally torn it away himself.
Penacony's most shrewd man lied to the arrogant fool that evening. There were four murders in that timeframe. One was a stowaway, the other was his precious sister, and the last pair was both your father and mother.
THEIR vision of a happy future for you did not welcome HIM.
All he recalls now was their polite disapproval turned screams when he made an attempt to ask for their blessing. Sunday only realized what he had done the moment he had sunk his teeth down your mother's arm, noticing how your father was already but boney remains of himself.
This Halovian ancestry's secret... it served him no good.
Why was he born into this race and why wasn't he raised just like you?
"Watchmaker... How can I ever forgive myself for this...?"
How can he dare proclaim to mete out justice when he deserves to be served the same sentence? "Sunday" himself is a transgressor, unworthy of yielding Harmony's name.
What heathen he was, to partake in flesh and blood that was not for his stomach simply because they both smelled just like you. What heretic he was, to place anger and hunger above his better judgement.
What karma it was, to find out his sister has been killed in his moments of guilt.
What retribution it was, to face that what he had done to others, will be done unto him.
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raointean · 21 days ago
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I actually love the idea that Billy and William fused instead of just body-hoping. William would have died if Billy didn't come in and they fused! I love him saying that he has a mom because adoption right 🎉
Yes! The alternative is just too sad for me. As for the adoption thing, it's NOT just this fandom that struggles to understand bio vs. adoptive parents. I'm in the Star Wars fandom and there are SO MANY PEOPLE that refer to Anakin and Padmé as Luke and Leia’s "real" parents. Meanwhile, Owen, Beru, Bail, and Breha are called kidnappers or just ignored entirely (yes, I loved the Obi-Wan show. Why do you ask?)
I think the same problem is sometimes happening in this fandom too. We know Wanda and Vision as characters and we want them to be a happy family. We do NOT know Rebecca and Jeff Kaplan nearly as well, so there's a tendency to want to take the child from the characters we don't know as well and give him to the characters we know, like, and want to be happy.
On a slightly happier note, here's all my headcanons about Billy Kaplan's life (not Billy Maximoff or William Kaplan, but the entity that is both of them)
As William's heart stopped, his soul separated from his body and was on its way to wherever Jewish people go when they die
Billy M's soul, at the same time, was fleeing because it didn't have a body to support it
He found William's body easy enough to get into (because a soul had just left it) and close enough to alive to be fixed
However, William's soul was in between Billy M and the body
Billy M could have gone around and been the only soul in the body, but he was scared, okay?
Poor guy was only a couple days old, alone for the first time ever, and his mom had just kinda killed him and the rest of his family
Long story short, Billy M crashes into William and drags them both into the body
Billy M fixes the body just enough to keep living, but doesn't bother too much about the head injury
Meanwhile, William is stuck to Billy M like silly putty when you have two different colors and, by the time they get to the hospital, the two colors have blended entirely to form a new color
There's no way to differentiate one from the other
Billy Kaplan is born!
Because Billy M didn't fix the head injury, they both have amnesia
Billy K wakes up and it's literally "no thoughts, head empty"
(Except for some lingering sensation of loneliness... like there should be something someone? else there)
But not for long because he soon discovers he can hear other people's thoughts!
Which is really funny because he doesn't know that other people can't hear his thoughts
Poor guy genuinely thinks that humans communicate via telepathy for a solid 24 hours before he gets enough weird looks that he puts two and two together
(His parents are totally aware of this
There's only so many times your kid can answer exactly the thought going through your head without you catching on
Also, this is the Marvel universe!
Shit like this just... happens sometimes
They figure he'll come to them when he's ready, and until then they'll think nice thoughts and be supportive)
Billy K spends a solid four months trying to remember who he was before, stealing memories from his parents' heads, and pretending to recover from the amnesia
(Rebecca and Jeff try so hard not to make him feel like they're just waiting for their old son to come back but...)
Four months in, Billy's at the mall with his mom on some errands and that's where he sees it
Hot Topic
He begs his mom to go in there, and it's the first really normal teenage thing he's done since the car crash so she lets him
For the first time in four months, Billy forgets all about car crashes, and memories, and hospitals, and expectations
All that exists is spiky jewelry, ripped black skinny jeans, and a million of those cheap and hilarious pins
Over time, the family settles into his "new normal" and chalk most of it up to teenage experimentation
In that three year period though, Billy can't shake the feeling that something's still missing
He feels out of place in his body, even with the new aesthetic
(He sees that one tumblr comic about the coocoo bird and cries-- a lot. It's the closest he ever gets to telling his parents about his out-of-place feeling)
He doesn't tell them though
Instead, he digs and digs into the weirdest, darkest, most demented corner of the internet
Reddit
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caxyanalysis · 4 months ago
Text
Thinking about how Homelander is actually so fucking tragic.
Raised to be the symbol of patriotism. Won the superpower lottery. Durable enough that a nuclear bomb wouldn't kill him, fast enough that nothing can outpace him, full freedom from gravity because of flight, laser vision that he can control the strength of to such a fine degree that he could cook popcorn or cauterize your brain in half and it's not even hard for him to do.
All of this, together, make him a god among men.
And it's so.
Fucking.
Boring.
And it's tragic, too.
It is.
I know, I know, "he's a fascist!!!" I get it, and you're right.
But look at what he's been through.
He was raised in a lab. No parents besides the scientists that studied him to figure out what he could and couldn't survive, what would and wouldn't hurt him, what he was capable of and how he could be useful.
At every turn, he was denied human connection in any meaningful way. His father was never in the picture, his mother was dead, he existed solely as a test subject, and as soon as he was old enough to be on TV, they wheeled him out like a shiny new toy and said "Look! It's the embodiment of America! The peak of human evolution!"
He has never, EVER known anything except two concepts: Fear and Blind Adoration.
The people who love him don't love HIM, they love the idea he represents. The people who know him fear him with all they have.
Spoilers for The Boys below
He finally meets someone who doesn't fear him, and claims to love him, and it's Stillwell. She doesn't fear him. But he doesn't realize the reason she doesn't fear him is because she thinks she has him under control. A little mommy-play here, a little milk there, and he's docile. She thinks she has him in her pocket.
But then she slips up. And out comes the truth. She's never loved him. Ever. She has always, always hated him, always been afraid of him. And suddenly all those happy memories of the only mother-figure he's ever known are tainted, ruined by the idea that she would have rather had him be dead than ever touch her, but she did what she felt she had to do so he would be a good boy.
And he doesn't understand. He was a good boy, wasn't he? His heart was in the right place, wasn't it? He only did what he thought would make her happy, and he tried to be have his best when she asked, didn't he? So why did she hate him so much? Why was she so afraid of him?
And it tears him up inside. It destroys him. He feels hurt, and angry, and scared, and it burns him up until that heat has nowhere to go but out.
And he kills her. And it kills him.
It's with Stillwell's death we see him truly change. He stops being the boy scout, in his own eyes. He just killed someone who meant everything to him. He killed someone he thought genuinely cared about him, saw him as good, and loved.
We watch him die right alongside her, and in that moment he performs one last act of kindness as he loses the final shred of hope in his heart: he saves Billy Butcher and makes sure that Stillwell's baby survives as well.
We see another kick in the head when he visits his "creator", the man in charge of the Homelander experiment that gave birth to him. And this man says he is nothing but a failure. A living embodiment of all that man did wrong, and all that man failed to achieve. He says that Homelander is nothing but one big failed experiment, and is his greatest regret in life.
Flash ahead. He's unchained, mostly. Edgar is still in control of him, but Edgar doesn't care enough to tug the leash. He expects Homelander to tie his own chain, and if he doesn't, then Edgar will yank it and choke the bastard for all he's worth until he sits, heels, like a good little attack dog.
And for the most part this works. Homelander stays under Edgar's radar, his descent hardly noticed, because he doesn't do anything that Vaught can track that he wouldn't have done before Stillwell's death.
All the while, mourning the loss of the only person to ever even pretend to care about him.
And then we meet Ryan, and realize who he is.
And when Homelander learns he has a son, we see something special, something that, until now, didn't seem possible.
We see the light come back into his eyes.
We see him start to hope again.
A son. The perfect opportunity to do better, to prove he is, in fact, a good man. If he can just do right by Ryan, if he can raise him right, be a good dad to him, show him the love, and compassion, and care that he never knew, then Ryan could grow up happy. Well-adjusted. We see that Homelander fully recognizes how broken and mangled a man he is.
Homelander wants Ryan to turn out better than him. He wants Ryan to turn out happier than him.
And we watch Stormfront ruin that pure, beautiful desire.
Stormfront corrupts him. He's vulnerable, he's weak-minded, after Stillwell. He knows what he wants, but he doesn't know how to do it or why, he knows what he desires, but he can't have it. And then Stormfront gives it to him. A supe who can not only take what he can dish out, but give it back just as well. A supe who sees him as good. A supe who seems to love him, truly.
She doesn't.
She, like all of his fans, loves WHAT he is, loves the IDEA of him, not Homelander himself.
He's blond, blue-eyed, white, and an omnipotent powerhouse.
And Stormfront is a nazi. How could she not love what he is and what he represents?
She manipulates him, turns him against his own idea of wanting to be good and convinces him that this brattiness, this pettiness, this immature need to be better than everyone is not a flaw, it's his birthright.
And Ryan is the product of that birthright. Ryan does not need to be better than Homelander, Ryan needs to learn from Homelander, learn to rule, to subjugate, because Homelander is a God, one who should rule the Earth, and Ryan is his Prince, destined to take over one day.
All of this is instilled into Homelander through Stormfront's manipulations. And on the one day every year that he's allowed to be treated like a person, the one day every year he gets a taste of humanity...
She does the one thing that would guarantee her lies stick like glue.
She dies.
She rips away the last person he ever thought he would have to live without, on the one day he never expected to be hurt on.
And we see that light, the one Ryan reignited, flicker.
He gets angry. He gets bitter. He realizes that, aside from Ryan, he is entirely peerless. Alone.
And Ryan must be nurtured, yes? Guided, right? Stormfront wanted the world for Ryan, and Homelander wants the best for his son, and so the world is exactly what Ryan will get. Homelander no longer cares about himself. He doesn't.
Homelander cannot be selfish past this point; he could drop dead then and there and as long as Ryan has the world in his palm, Homelander would die happy.
But he can't die. He won't die. Ryan needs him. Ryan deserves a father. Ryan deserves Homelander's life, his attention, his dedication.
And we see spots of vanity, yes. The preening, the pruning of grey hairs, the bitterness over his noticeable aging.
But these are not the same as selfishness. These are things integral to Homelander. He's supposed to be a God. God's don't age, why is he aging? It's so disgustingly human. That's what he thinks.
But it gives him a sense of urgency. He doesn't know how long he has. A year? Ten? Twenty? A hundred? Two hundred? More? Nobody knows, with supes. Some don't age at all, others age too fast, others age slowly, and Homelander is already a one-in-a-million fluke. Who's to say he won't suddenly age fifty years in the span of the next ten? Who's to say he'll ever age beyond what he is now?
He doesn't know. And he can't control it. He can't fight it. He can't change it. He has to prepare for the possibility he hates most.
He has to prepare for his death.
But then he learns who his father is. He learns that his father is alive, even. Soldier Boy, the idea that inspired Homelander. And he has to meet the man, has to introduce Ryan to his grandfather. We see that light in his eyes grow, because now he doesn't just have a son, he has a father.
The father he needed.
And when he finally meets him, finally gets face-to-face with the man who could so easily give him everything he ever wanted, the man who could fix him, show him what it means to be a parent...
He's rejected.
Soldier Boy tells him that he's pathetic, that he's nothing, that he's hardly even a man. Even the suit Homelander is so proud of isn't free from insult, with Soldier Boy saying "Look at you...You're wearing a goddamn cape..."
He has nothing but disappointment for what Homelander is, and resentment for the way Homelander was raised, but sees him as too far gone, too broken, too weak to fix. The only cure is death.
And once again, we see that light flicker.
He needs to be better than this man, DO better than this man.
And that means securing Ryan's place atop the world. This is why he calls in Sister Sage. Sister Sage is so incredibly intelligent, so beautifully smart, she can guarantee things he would never even figure out are possible. And, begrudgingly, he accepts her help.
But her help isn't giving him what he really wants most, because while putting Ryan atop the pyramid is his end goal, he wants Ryan's love just as badly. He wants to see the fruits of his efforts, to know that what he's doing is good and right, that it's best for Ryan.
And Ryan is showing him, at every turn, that it's not right.
Homelander kills for Ryan, and Ryan doesn't like it.
Homelander makes Ryan the object of public adoration, and Ryan doesn't like it.
Homelander is glad Billy's dying, and Ryan doesn't like it.
Everything Homelander does for Ryan, every effort he makes, is torn apart by the fact that Ryan doesn't want any of it. He wants a dad, not a coach, he wants a parent, not an instructor.
He wants a life, not godhood.
And Homelander has been so corrupted, so broken, so destroyed by every single person in his life that he cannot understand that.
To him, godhood and life are one and the same. Being alive is not a right, in his eyes, it is something that is deserved, earned, a reward, and he is the man to impress, he is the man to earn it from, and one day that man will be Ryan, and why can't Ryan see any of that?
None of this is in defense of Homelander. But I can't see one side of anything without seeing every other side of it.
And in Homelander's mind, he has done everything he can to be loved, to be appreciated, to be known and cared about...
And every single time, his power has caused people to hate him, to fear him. The only love he's ever known is that of the public and that of his son, and with every outburst, every conflict of interests, he is slowly losing that more and more.
And every time Ryan runs away from him, every time Ryan cries because of him, every time Ryan frowns over something Homelander has done, every human Ryan mourns, is a slap in the face. Water on the fire.
And we see that light drain from his eyes a little more each time.
I don't believe anything Homelander has done is justified.
But I do believe that, in his shoes, with his life, under all of the same circumstances...
I believe most of us would be no different than he is.
Broken.
Betrayed.
Abused.
Lashing out at every reminder of the pains of our existence.
A scared, angry child, with the power of a god, who was never shown that a better way does exist.
A wounded animal conditioned from birth to hate humans for what they did to it.
Homelander is tragic.
And I feel so very sorry for him.
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shalotttower · 11 months ago
Text
A Heart Deceived
Title: A Heart Deceived
Fandom: Far Cry 5
Characters: Jacob Seed x Reader (female)
Summary: AU where soulmates share the same marking and Jacob doesn't have to brand you any further.
Word count: 2900+
Notes: soulmates, yandere!Jacob Seed, Reader is not the Deputy, captivity, violence, emotional manipulation, dub-con kissing, scars and injuries description: Reader has a mutilated ear and facial scars from a wolf attack and is not happy about it, a mild form of Stockholm Syndrome.
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His fingers are surprisingly gentle. You don't expect it from him, the gentleness, Jacob is not kind or caring. Jacob is not warm, not nurturing, not indulgent. Yet his thumb skims across your jaw with quiet focus. Down the side of your neck, up your chin to follow the slanted line there, then it repeats the whole procedure on a different scar. They had long healed by now and turned into uneven ridges of mismatched tissue.
It hurt when the damned wolf bit you, the next day, and for many following days; the effective and precise killing machine aimed for the throat, and if you didn't twist the last moment, would have succeeded.
Jacob never punished the wolf, it was serving its purpose, while you, you were supposed to think before acting and understand the possible consequences.
The pain could be endured and later forgotten, what could not was the humiliation of lying on the dirty ground and the shiny view of Jacob's boots growing larger until they stopped in the line of your vision. A moment of painful awareness: the escape attempt which failed so abruptly and so brutally had become laughable. Jacob grabbed your hair and shook you like a disobedient puppy. "That's on you, sweetheart. Be wary of the quiet ones, they say."
Those last words sounded as if he were talking to himself, rather than anyone else.
"I warned you."
He did.
Jacob is right, not in everything, but in many things. One can try and deny it, another can scoff, but the bottom line is the same: Jacob is right in many things, and at times it's better to listen. Even despite an involuntary gagging reaction.
Your heart hammered and every single beat of it brought to the surface what you already knew — there would be no other attempts. The paleness from fear or perhaps blood loss must've shown on your face, because he let go of you and crouched down. "Pathetic."
It lacked genuine heat, disappointment, or any emotion. Being disappointed would mean that Jacob expected something in the first place. He pulled off his jacket and pressed it to your face, stemming the bleeding. The ground seemed more interesting than ever, dry soil dotted with rocks and grass blades scattered everywhere, trampled by people's feet.
You don't want to look at him or acknowledge the touch to a small sword on your wrist, identical to the one above his left elbow. The mark is a clean reminder and a binding claim for life. You don't want to see it or remember how Jacob's face twisted when he realized just who you were.
Like someone had slapped him.
A lot has happened; Montana turned different from what you saw on TV and the world suddenly shifted under your feet, rearranged from a little road trip across the states into his territory, his commands, his people. A part of you — a foolish, soft part — wished you could've met under different circumstances, in a different place and you told him once about it in a moment of weakness. Jacob stilled at first, but then kept cleaning his gun. "We're here, sweetheart. Nothing we can do 'bout it."
Could've beens and never happeneds weren't worth wasting thoughts on.
Now Jacob is tracing your scars. He's not handsome, not really, there's too much roughness to the lines of his face, dark circles and untrimmed beard, but... you frown. You don't know how to describe Jacob Seed or why you even bother trying. It's odd to think about him this way. Weird.
Jacob catches your eyes. "What?"
You close them. "Nothing."
He makes a noncommittal sound, then leans in. The kiss to your forehead is unexpected and brief. A lot of them are — quick kisses on your temple when Jacob thinks you're asleep, on your nape when he leaves the bed before dawn. They make you wonder just what he wants from you.
He never expects affection back.
Doesn't try anything further, and you both are suspended in this limbo, neither being the first to break it, nor acknowledge its growing significance with every passing day. One part of you craves it, to yield in a different way, not because it is required, but because you want, yet Jacob doesn't ask, so perhaps it's for the better.
Another gets nauseous. He breaks people. Like dry twigs, discarding the pieces when they have no more use. You've seen his Chosen training until they begged, cried and crawled, their pride crushed along with the body.
There are days you can't bear looking at him.
***
Sometimes, sometimes, you wish him dead and gone from the world, then the mark on your wrist aches like a fresh wound.
"When will you take off the chain?" You ask and wiggle your foot a bit. It's long enough to reach the bathroom, to wander around the quarters, but not to walk outside. Jacob doesn't look up from his book. The cover is worn out and you suspect he read it many times already, military stuff. Strategy. Survival tactics, you have no idea.
"When I know you've learned your lesson."
So, not today.
You sigh and roll onto your stomach. "It's stupid."
He doesn't respond.
It's annoying more than anything. Reason — you're his soulmate, not some runaway cow ready to get lost in Montana wilderness — didn't help and only gained you a blank stare followed by a lock click. The chain rattles with each movement, loud and distracting; Jacob just keeps reading as if nothing happens.
Sometimes, sometimes, you catch yourself thinking that this isn't so bad after all. He treats you well for a cult leader: fed, clothed, clean, sheltered. Compared to the cages his future Chosen sleep in, you don't get to complain. You have a comfortable bed instead of cold dirty floor, normal meals rather than a chunk of raw meat, privacy and silence without old school music 24/7.
You frown. No, it's not nice. It's Stockholm Syndrome, plain and simple. You should be free, away from this place.
"Are you angry?"
Jacob turns another page. "No."
His room smells of pine wood and gun oil, with an undertone of metal. The furniture is scarce and practical. A wardrobe, a desk with a radio placed on top, one bookshelf. Bare walls except for a giant map pinned opposite the bed; you've memorized all the markings on it during your stay. The areas which got liberated by Deputy are red, his outposts are circled in blue. Jacob doesn't talk about Deputy much, but the way he clenches his jaw over the radio frequency makes you think they must be a real pain in the ass.
Secretly you hope they blow Eden's Gate HQ to pieces soon.
What would it mean for you?
These are questions, vague and inappropriately timed, coming to mind. What if Deputy happens to eventually tear the Project apart? They escaped John, escaped Jacob and you were to personally witness his foul mood for two days straight. You overhear bits and pieces of conversations, the Chosen talk if they think no one listens — Deputy is strong and clever. Persistent and cunning. Maybe that's the reason Jacob's so obsessed with them.
What if...
You glance at him from under your eyelashes and rub the mark. They say there's a connection between soulmates. If one dies, another experiences it on a physical level. Jacob said that was bullshit. His brother didn't confirm or deny when you asked him after a sermon.
Joseph Seed unnerves you. Not just because he believes himself to be God's vessel. There is something in his voice, quiet and soothing like the distant rolls of thunder, it raises goosebumps when he starts preaching and you're forced to sit through it. Something in his eyes behind yellow-tinted glasses sends shivers down your spine, very little to do with his religious fanaticism.
What would you feel if Jacob died?
The thought creates an unpleasant twist in your stomach, unwanted bond or not, it leaves you queasy. You curl on the bed. Jacob has reading glasses, you barely held back a snort the first time you saw them propped up his nose. He shoots a flat look from above the pages but doesn't comment on your inquisitive stare.
By now you know when to speak and to remain silent (mostly). He dislikes unruly ones and finds satisfaction showing them just how insignificant they are, how mistaken in every single sense. Weak. That's why you annoy him mildly when feeling particularly brave or in need of interaction, but never play soldier or power. It triggers something which is best avoided, gets people punished, then shot in front of others. Or sent for trials, you're not sure which is worse.
Jacob marks a page and sets the book aside. "What?"
"What 'what'?" You ask back, fiddling with the hem of a grey camouflage shirt. It's way too big on your frame, Jacob likes the look of it, judging by how much of your wardrobe consists of his stuff now that you don't leave the room.
"I can hear the wheels in your head turning, spit it out."
"What would happen to me if something... happened to you?"
You're afraid of saying 'if you die' because it's final, even though Jacob seems invincible most of the times. A mountain against hurricanes. Yet everyone dies eventually and the Deputy keeps winning against all odds set before them.
"Nothing. Joseph takes care of you."
This is news, and frankly not the answer you hoped for.
('You'd go free' was. He didn't say 'I won't die' either.)
Tension seeps into your shoulders without a conscious thought. "Why? I am nobody to him."
"You are my soulmate," Jacob replies, simple as that, like it explains everything. Perhaps in their cult world it does, but not yours.
"So?"
He pats his thigh.
It's a gesture without much interpretation required, but you stay rooted on the bed. Cautious. You've grown familiar with each other after living together for months — sharing a space tends to do this to people — still tonight is different, full with awkwardness you haven't felt since that time he walked in on you changing.
Jacob's stare is intense. Heavy, cold blue eyes linger on your wrist where the sword surrounded by flames peeks from under the long sleeve. You swallow a lump in your throat and get up on unsteady legs.
"So he will do it out of memory. You're family, pup, whether you wish it or not."
With the same caution you sit on his lap, war memories written in pink-red skin decorate his face. Just like yours, you think, the only difference is the place and origin. There's something intimate about being like this. Jacob holds you in place once you settle down, not comfortable, but not exactly uncomfortable either.
"Never took you for a cuddly type," you say to shield yourself from growing unease. "Why the change?"
Jacob's thumb presses to the corner of your lips. "Got tired of those puppy eyes staring at me the whole evening, sweetheart. You can have a closer look."
"I don't have puppy eyes. And maybe I like looking from afar."
"Yeah?"
His beard has a prickly feeling to it.
You know your face will never be the same after what happened. From his point of view, Jacob can probably see where the scars begin in the hairline, then continue downwards only an inch away from your eye; small miracles and such. Half of your ear is missing, a good solid chunk. It's not a nice look.
"Don't touch them," you mutter.
You don't mean to share your thoughts in such an abrupt manner, but these intimate moments become a source of discomfort, like a sharp, twisting knife. Jacob doesn't flinch at the sight, he probably saw worse things, still it feels humiliating being reminded of your shortcomings and the fact that this is your face — permanently marked.
Jacob doesn't stop.
"Beauty dies fast, darlin'," he says slowly. "This here... this'll stay."
He never sugarcoats anything. Never lies to spare feelings, ruthless and pragmatic with a clear understanding of what matters and what doesn't. Only the weak need empty reassurances; his words. You hate this side of Jacob just as much as admire it on occasion, right now you wish he said something else. Beauty dies fast.
"Thank you Jacob, very comforting. Top ten phrases you should tell someone who got mauled by a Judge." You cross your arms, wondering why the hell are you talking about this. With Jacob. The worst choice possible to bring up sensitive topics, or maybe the only one, since there's not a lot of people around anyway.
"I ain't here to stroke your ego, sweetheart. This," he traces a scar, "is a lesson to remember. Next time when thinking 'bout running — think again and think good."
There will be no next time regardless of how he phrases it. The chain rattles every night when you shift under the blankets and falls down with an annoying bang as soon as you get up. There's nowhere to run too, the Whitetail Mountains belong to Jacob, he rules them like a king would rule his kingdom, with iron fist and strict order, and who knows what the local Resistance will do to you if they catch you first.
If they figure out whose soulmate you are.
You're trapped between the Deputy destroying outposts and Jacob hunting them across the region, like a mouse stuck in a corner while cats keep prowling around.
The sky outside has an orange-pink hue, casting Jacob's face into soft light and deep shadows. He takes off his glasses, setting them on the book's cover, then wipes a stray tear from the corner of your eye. "You gonna cry over looks?"
You sniffle. "Yes. I wish I never met you."
He stiffens. For a second you worry it might have pushed a wrong button. Jacob never hurt you physically, still there's a healthy dose of fear, not necessarily born out of past experiences. At times his presence just radiates off in silent waves so thick you can feel them crashing into yourself before he walks away and doesn't return for days, leaving you alone with the Chosen stationed behind the doors to watch over and report back to their Herald.
Jacob leans closer until your foreheads almost press into each other.
He doesn't initiate touch often. Once in a while he lets you sleep on his arm instead of a pillow or allows you to sit closer than usual during meals, but that's it. There are boundaries set, most of them are unspoken rules which you picked up along the way: you can ask questions and be generally yourself within reason — as long as it doesn't border on disrespect, Jacob will tolerate occasional attitude in very small doses; you can request certain items provided he approves; he prefers silence during breakfast.
Never challenge him publicly and don't talk bad about his siblings.
This confession can't be taken back, nor do you wish to, because it's true. You regret meeting him, and it was much better to wonder and guess, create images of a faceless man somewhere in the depths of your mind and fantasize about possibilities. How does one even go back to normal life after this?
(Not that any chance of doing so exists in the foreseeable future.)
"I figured, darlin'," Jacob says finally. His voice lacks anger, as if he expected those words one day or another, Jacob isn't naive or stupid and is surprisingly aware of himself in a lot of matters, of the fact that very little would want to end up where he dragged you and being imprisoned under the heavy metal chain doesn't add to fond memories either. "Fair enough."
In all months you two lived together, sharing food and space, in all months, he never kissed you.
Now he does.
His lips are chapped, dry and slightly rough.
You find yourself going rigid at first, unsure what to make out of it. It's different from what you imagined, the fantasy version seemed more... violent and harsh, less intimate and private. He breaks the kiss briefly and then resumes it again.
Slow-slow-quick, Jacob steals your breath away bit by bit until your head spins, until your hands feel clammy and then, when you think you can't take it any longer, he pulls back.
"Won't apologize 'bout the scars, pup. You deserved a lesson."
Your throat feels parched.
"But not of this kind. Never wanted it for you."
It doesn't sound apologetic, neither regretful, but it is what it is, probably the closest to it Jacob will ever be capable of. His hand strokes the back of your neck in slow and repetitive circles, and in an odd way, it does seem soothing.
He takes you to bed minutes later, maneuvers you closer under the sheets and turns off the light. The window is open letting in the sounds of evening wildlife: crickets chirp loudly nearby, some owl hoots in the distance; Montana smells different than other states. Sharper, wilder. You lie like this for a bit, curled against his side and he's always so fucking warm, a human furnace incarnate.
"The moment I saw the marking — I wished you never met me too."
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