#genuinely feel like GO has such a valuable message for all of us

[flameraven]

This. We in fandom have ALL been wrestling with this since the first allegations dropped. Different people come to different conclusions. I spoke with an IRL friend of mine (not in fandom) and she is flat-out refusing to have anything more to do with him. She won't rewatch Good Omens because Gaiman will get residuals, she returned her Sandman audiobooks, the works. I respect her choice. But for me personally... I find the community and creative outlet of Good Omens fandom more valuable, and to be creating more good, than worrying about the 50 cents or whatever Gaiman is going to get from me rewatching the series. And as OP says, you are also giving David Tennant and Michael Sheen and all the rest of the cast and crew members 50 cents as well*. Gaiman is a multimilionaire. He is going to continue to make money. Me giving up this fandom I love is not going to make any appreciable impact on his financial situation or his life. But it will hurt me and my community. I don't think that's worth it. Also, we live in a world dominated by giant corporations doing shitty things, you really can't even go grocery shopping without somebody terrible making some money. I find worrying about pennies like this more performative than helpful. We do not all need to be Chidi from the Good Place worrying about whether we ended up in Hell because we bought almond milk. And frankly, given the Horrors we're all living through, we have to take our joy where we can find it.

So yeah, I'm gonna continue to enjoy these two immortals and their love story-- and the very valuable message Good Omens has, that when the world is about to end and everything seems hopeless, you have to stand up and try to save it anyway. Because it just might work.

*I have no idea how much residuals for TV shows actually are, realistically it's probably much less than 50c. I'm making this number up based on some of the SAG folks during the strike talking about getting tiny residual checks for 25c or 50c.

so let's see if I've understood the process:

-person makes a post calling a whole fandom problematic, saying all the fans are crazy and doing this and that;

-all the people not in that fandom take the post as godspell truth and make it go viral;

-not-in-the-fandom-people start harassing said fans with insults, clogging the tags of that fandom with unnecessary hate, threats, insults, kys etc.

-Peak Tumblr Activism Reached!

[taffywabbit]

"why not just make your own website?"

with the announcement of cohost's death and amidst all the other tumultuous shit currently going on with social media as a concept (i am AMAZED twitter has survived this long given the circumstances), one suggestion that i've been hearing a lot is "we should just go back to the good old days of personal websites. let's all just make neocities pages!!"

(this is gonna be a long one sorry)

and like. idk! it's certainly something i've considered, i think it would be a fun thing to have, but it also feels like the equivalent of "capitalism sucks so let's all just run off into the woods and live in a cabin outside of society" to me. like it would be nice, it would be fun, but it doesn't ultimately solve the actual problems that are present with the modern internet, it just evades them. more importantly in my case and many others, it does not really help people who rely on the modern internet and the connections they're able to make there for their income. sure i can make a website and host my art and blog posts there, but who's going to see it? i can't build a consistent audience and make a living off of random passersby who peek at my website once, say "huh, neat!" and MAYBE add it to an RSS feed or whatever if they really like it. there's minimal potential for meeting and impressing new people outside my existing circles if i don't ALSO still have some manner of social media platform to promote the website on.

a lot of the "solutions" i see people proposing for the slow, painful decline of social media as a user experience keep coming back to old-fashioned, more isolated/insular systems. we miss forums, we miss personal webpages, we miss newsletters, etc etc. but like... those things were ideal in the "old web" because the old web was more about sharing hobbies and interests with whoever happened to pass by and check them out, and even just USING the internet was a niche hobby in and of itself for a lot of people. if you wanna be kinda cynical about it (and not unjustifiably so), web 2.0 is much more blatantly business-oriented, and its algorithms and carefully crafted UX's are primarily meant to funnel you towards viewing ads and spending money on products. looking at it that way, it sure does suck and Everything Was Better Before! but the modern web is ALSO more powerful than anything before it for just like. connecting people. spreading information and news. showing your art/music/writing/thoughts/etc to strangers who never knew you existed an hour ago. putting the tools to reach out to someone and tell them you think they're cool right there on the same website where their art is hosted, just a comment or a message away.

if you're able to avoid patterns of engagement-bait and obsessing over follower counts as a measure of self-worth (a big "if", i realize, but i view it like installing an adblocker - it's just kind of a basic prerequisite for modern internet safety and survival), a lot of these systems can genuinely be really positive and life-changing in ways that were simply not possible 20 years ago! almost all of my current closest friends are people I met through sharing our art on platforms like Twitter who were complete strangers at the time. all of the art clients that regularly pay my bills and support my work came from places like that too! the "social" part of "social media" is really what makes it ultimately worth keeping around in any form, and makes the pursuit of a Good social media platform still valuable.

there's a lot to love about the old web - its aesthetics, simplicity and freedom for personal expression - but every time someone says "just delete your socials and make a personal website" i am forced to confront the fact that i could never do what i currently do or be the person i am on the old web. if i was stuck hanging out in my own little space and only ever interacting with people who openly and loudly share my interests, i couldn't support myself with art full-time, i probably would never have met the kind and quiet strangers who are now my best friends and have made me who i am, and i'd just generally get a lot less insight into the vast range of experiences and perspectives that exist outside of my own. my life would be on a fundamentally different trajectory in countless ways without the advent of web 2.0.

and that's not to say "well twitter and facebook and tumblr all suck but you kinda still have to hand it to them" cuz you don't, obviously. they're corporations, and their job is to take the personalities and thoughts and art of the people who use their products and try to scrunch it all into something uninform and marketable that generates profit and pleases their shareholders. but like, you CAN still make a good thing out of them! these websites are tools just as much as geocities or myspace or IRC used to be. and the one thing these newer tools are pretty much all REALLY good at is discoverability. if you're just a hobbyist at the things you wanna share on the internet, then you likely don't have a lot of use for those tools, and perhaps you WOULD genuinely be happier just keeping a personal blog site or hanging out in private groupchats or sticking to specialized federated Mastodon instances or whatever. it just isn't feasible for me, and there are a LOT of people in my same situation. my entire industry of online freelance artists barely existed 20 years ago, and the web culture of that era is largely incompatible with my continued survival in the mid-2020s. i would LOVE to run off and live in the woods in concept, but all my survival skills are adapted for city living and i would just eat the wrong berry and die out there. i want- i NEED people to try and improve the spaces we're in, and support better forms of social media (like what cohost was trying and largely succeeding to do!) instead of just complaining that it all sucks, everything was better when we were kids, and digging ourselves little holes to hide in. much like all the other problems and frustrations and systemic issues of the world we live in, the modern web isn't going to go away if you just ignore it, so we may as well try to make it better for everyone.

anyways tl;dr i probably WILL make a neocities at some point. it could be fun, even if it doesn't help my career stability or whatever. but i do also need ALL THE SOCIAL PLATFORMS I USE FOR MY JOB TO STOP EXPLODING PRETTY PLEASE, and failing that, some actual half-decent alternatives that aren't going to fizzle out in a month would also be great thanks ✌

[eowyntheavenger]

Hi! I saw your post on telling Americans to vote, and I was wondering what you think of posts from people from other parts of the world who are calling Americans evil for voting for Biden because of his support for Israel. I've seen a few already. They seem to be completely convinced that Americans deliberately voted for Biden specifically to side against Palestine and no other reason, and spread the general (pretty ignorant and hateful) message of "Americans are evil because of the actions of their government and because they collectively refuse to vote for a president who is good and not simply 'the lesser of two evils'". It frustrates me because they seem to think they're experts on US politics, culture, and society and have all the answers, but it also makes me concerned because it reminds me of the whole Russian bot thing from last time. Like, I'm 99% sure the people reblogging these posts aren't Russian bots (don't know about the OPs though), and they unquestioningly believe this. What do you think of this and how would you go about addressing this issue? Do you think it's possible to get them to understand how little they actually know about the US and how they're actually promoting a message that makes things worse for everyone? I've also seen less scathing posts that are just disheartened and don't seem to believe the democrats are truly better to vote for than the republicans and so it's just two sides of the same coin. To be fair, I think that sort of feeling is only further encouraged because there didn't really seem to be much if any progress made with Biden, not even back to square one after Trump moved the country so far backwards. I think most Americans really wish the elections actually had good candidates and they could pick the best of two goods, but are frustrated and stuck with the current system and don't know how to actually get to the point where there are good candidates. (Though personally I think voting for the one who isn't actively trying to make themselves a king with unlimited terms is a decent start. I can understand the frustration though.)

Hi! Thanks for the ask. This stuff worries me too. I've gotten comments on my posts like that too, telling me/other Americans that we're evil for voting for Biden.

But I've seen a much larger number of comments and posts from people outside the United States BEGGING us to vote for Biden. I literally get tags like that on my posts EVERY DAY urging Americans to vote blue. So I think that's valuable context, even if it doesn't solve the problem of the "I hate everybody who votes for Biden" crowd.

And yes, it's definitely a shitty argument on their part to claim that people voting for Biden are specifically siding against Palestine. Literally every single person I know in real life and online who plans to vote for Biden has been criticizing and protesting his policies on Palestine.

In terms of convincing the anti-voters that they're wrong, honestly, I don't know. They don't listen to reason and they seem intent on spreading despair. Some of Biden's policies have been terrible (Willow oil-drilling project), some of them have been downright evil (military aid to Israel), but I'm a rational person and I know that Trump is worse in every respect.

I've tried debating them. It's been pointless every time. They genuinely don't know how the government works, which scares me. Common takes include: 1) a genuine lack of awareness of how pro-Israel Trump and the right wing are, combined with magical thinking that a virtually unknown third party candidate can win the presidential election, 2) truly impressive mental gymnastics blaming Biden for the overturn of Roe v. Wade, and 3) continuing the mental gymnastics to blame Biden and the Democrats for anti-trans policies...

I guess my advice is to either ignore them and move on, or debunk things when you have time/energy? It's easier said than done, I know. There's nothing more annoying than someone being stupid on the internet, especially when they accuse you of stuff that just isn't true, and especially when they're spreading dangerous misinformation or voter-suppression rhetoric.

Like you, I'm highly suspicious of anyone who advocates AGAINST voting, or against voting blue. And I agree, many of these people are not bots, like you said, but I call them useful idiots, because they're doing the bots' work for them.

The one thing you said that I'm going to push back on is "there didn't really seem to be much if any progress made with Biden." Biden's actually made lots of progress on a variety of issues, and reversed some of Trump’s damage, it just doesn't get a lot of fanfare and it’s unfortunately happening at the same time as Republican gains in state legislatures and while they control the Supreme Court. But Biden and his administration have:

• invested billions in green architecture and clean energy, including making sure federal investments benefit low-income communities

• introduced new fines for companies' methane emissions

• introduced a plan to cut the federal government's greenhouse gas emissions by 65% by 2030 (that includes the military, which is a huge emitter)

• passed a huge bill for improving the country's infrastructure, including bridges, roads, broadband and more

• introduced first-ever national strategy on gender equality and equity and pushed Congress to pass the Equal Rights Amendment

• fought for women's reproductive rights after the overturn of Roe v. Wade

• put more women, people of color, and women of color on the federal bench than any of his predecessors combined

• nominated Kentaji Brown Jackson as the first Black woman to serve on the Supreme Court

• boosted funding to historically Black colleges

• ordered the DOJ to end the use of private prisons by the federal government

• pardoned thousands of people convicted on federal marijuana charges

• created a White House office of gun violence prevention

• passed the Respect for Marriage Act, guaranteeing federal rights and benefits for same-sex couples

• rolled out a series of actions to protect the rights and safety of the LGBTQ+ community, including protecting queer and trans foster youth, improving access to mental health services, and addressing the rise in hate crimes

• challenged discriminatory state bans against gender-affirming care and trans athletes

• called to support trans youth in State of the Union address and restored the White House tradition of recognizing Pride Month

• changed passport rules so that people can obtain a passport with no gender marker

• examined efforts by each federal agency to advance LGBTQ+ rights around the world

• reversed Trump's transgender military ban

• protected the rights of incarcerated trans people

• forgave billions in student debt, repeatedly, and introduced penalties for college programs that trap students in debt

• slashed bank overdraft fees

• expanded guaranteed overtime pay for millions of people

• made union-busting harder

• prevented discriminatory mortgage lending

• made efforts to expand the child tax credit, which could lift hundreds of thousands of children out of poverty

• cracked down on agriculture monopolies to support farmers and small businesses

• made it so the government is going to start taking drug companies' patents away if they don't make affordable drugs

• made over-the-counter birth control pills available for the first time

• lowered the cost of hearing aids and expanded access to them

• spent millions of dollars on students' mental health

• reversed discriminatory healthcare rules

• reinvigorated cancer research

• announced plans to replace all leaded pipes in the next ten years as well as combatting lead exposure abroad

• changed rules for how people can get aid after disasters so they can get more protection and immediate payments more easily

• introduced new data privacy rules protecting people from tech companies

• pushed the federal government to monitor AI risks

• maintained steadfast support for Ukraine in the face of Russian aggression

• maintained steadfast support for Taiwan in the face of Chinese intimidation

• strengthened ties with allies in Asia and the Pacific Islands

• pledged climate change assistance to low-lying Pacific Island countries

• literally IMMEDIATELY after being elected, Biden fortified DACA, rejoined the Paris Agreement, and ended Trump's discriminatory "Muslim ban", ended the Keystone XL Pipeline and fossil duel development in wildlife monuments, (same as last link) rejoined the WHO, strengthened COVID-19 response measures on a variety of fronts, re-included non-citizens in the U.S. census, and passed executives orders on racial equity in the federal government

And I'm sure there's more I left out.

There are also things Biden does that literally don’t make the news, but matter a lot, like funding the Postal Service, and continuing to have a State Department so we can conduct overseas diplomacy (Trump tried to defund the USPS and wants to purge the State Department and fill it with loyalists).

[belong2human-kind]

I just LOVE how all these times, being a Sabine and Ezra shipper, I would imagine this fluff stuff of Sabine wearing his clothes daily because... have you ever borrowed a male clothing before??? Like any??? THEY ARE SO COMFORTABLE

And ofc, to give it some sniffs too because THE SCENT OF THE PERSON YOU stole it BORROWED FROM IS THERE, and you will genuinely feel so close to them. And this isn't strictly related to lovers, no, it can be anyone who you have a strong bond and relationship. I've had my best friends (male, female, nb, all my closest ones) clothes and when I'd miss them too much, I'd give their clothes hugs and sniffs, but I won't lie that this surely happens waaaay more and more frequently with my boyfriend.

And yes, I made THOUSANDS of unfinished fics (promise I'll post them here or on Ao3 someday) where Sabine will walk around with his shirts, pants, jackets and everything she can while he is still around to tease her bc of it and ESPECIALLY since he went missing, where she is just using to feel more close to him now that he is gone and guess what???

Tell me this isn't one of his long sleeve shirts! It's TOTALLY HIS! I mean, why wouldn't it be??? She is living in HIS OLD HOME, his refuge and shelter during all the worst times of his life, his safe place to meditate and be alone with his self, with the memory of their parents who used to fight against the empire using the communication tower, the area he keeps his helmet collection, sleeps in, keep valuable things from his past, a place so meaningful to him and SHE IS LIVING THERE LIKE HE LEFT IT FOR HERE TO DECLARE HER OWN, GUYS SHE MADE IT HER OWN HOME!

She lives in his home, has his saber, painting a huge wall in memory of him so she could STROKE GENTLY HIS CHEEKS (yeah don't say that during the epilog was the first time she ever done that, I won't buy it) and also spent 10 years taking care of everything he loved and gave his life to protect, his planet and people, like SHE WAS ONE OF THEM! Like they almost meant to her as much as it meant for him. Also, should I keep going and say that her pass time is to turn on the holocron to re-watch his message with the white loth-cat she just adopted??? The one creature that was the most connected to this man????

She for sure is wearing his clothes. She seems to be wanting to be a part of him, just like when she painted a Loth-Cat, the white Loth-Cat on the core of her phoenix symbol. It's like what @jessicas-pi said about the mandalorian's marriage vows, like she want her and him to be one, together or apart, one.

And I am so happy because I've been imagining this happening in my headcanons since the end of the series, listening to the song Hoodie, and now this song and this gift, man, they give me life. I need to see them reunite as much as I need food to survive.

And if they won't turn out as a romantic couple like a lot of people want, I'll be sad but conformed with platonic because in my head they will always be canon, they will always be the best f*cking duo and partners I ever seem. Their connection is stronger than a kiss in screen, and although I'd live and love to see that, they don't need it. They never needed to be so linked with each other, to be so in sync. They do love each other in a way that maybe we can't even label or describe, and that's for sure.

They may never be romantic, but they surely are one, together or apart, they are one! 💙🧡💜🤍

[yourlocaldisneyvillain]

Writing explicit material about an aged up character is NOT it. Wednesday is a minor in the show, aging her up in your fanfiction doesn’t make it any less creepy. You even state in your writing that Wednesdays attraction develops WHILE SHE IS STILL A MINOR IN SCHOOL. The original attraction came from a child’s mind, do you not see how that’s wrong? Aging characters up just to ship them with adults is disgusting and writing sexual content about it is even worse. If you wanted to write about stuff like this I would’ve suggested making OC’s and not using already made characters that have a fandom surrounding them. That would’ve stopped some of the backlash and made it a little less creepy. Genuinely hope you see how this is wrong, please stop, thank you.

hi! i suggest you don't read stories you find upsetting! there's plenty of other fics to read, both mine and written by other people.

i also it's sweet you think an anonymous message will make me see the error of my Immoral ways. also are you suggesting it would be better if i wrote a fic with a different minor that grows up and then has a relationship with a former teacher? i don't understand what exactly you mean and how that would, in your book, be better than this lol. also, i don't know if you're aware but all adults you know were once, in fact, minors.

i know this isn't a message in good faith, and that nothing i say will change your mind. that's alright. nothing you say will change mine, either! i will write what i want and how i want it. you are welcome not to read it and say, well, not for me, moving on.

however, since you were so free to give me a friendly suggestion to Stop It, i will be so free to suggest you give stories that make you uncomfortable a go. the Immorality will not, in fact, rub off on you. i do think it's some of my best work writing wise, and i think the quality of it is pretty decent. there are even Themes and Motifs, and believe it or not it isn't porn (there is one smutty chapter out of fourteen and that's it). you could read it and try to articulate which parts of the story make you uncomfortable. you could try to read it as purely a piece of fiction, a story (which it is), without attaching a moral judgement to it -- perhaps try putting yourself in the shoes of the characters, or perhaps even the author, and try seeing how and why someone would write a story about very unusual, particular people who find each other, despite all odds. you could perhaps even ponder the concept of the "immoral" nature of their relationship being a metaphor for any unconventional relationship. after you do all of that, if you still feel uncomfortable, that's perfectly alright! i think some fiction is meant to make people uncomfortable, and it is a valuable skill to be able to approach it analytically and pinpoint exactly what doesn't sit right with you -- that, unfortunately, requires reading the work in good faith.

i will always encourage meaningful critique of my work! however, just some anonymous rando coming up to me and saying "this is WRONG!!!" will do precisely nothing.

you've spoken your piece, but if you continue to pester me with similar messages you will be blocked! have a nice day!

[yoakkemae]

all of the compliments i've been hoarding:

@dvarapala: Hey hey, I just wanted to let you know that I very much enjoy having your muses on my dash. I cannot remember which ones brought me here but I am happy to stick around. Here's to more shenanigans and us writing them together in 2023! <3

@lovesigned: “(ෆ ͒•∘̬• ͒)◞ + i know we literally haven't written anything together yet but i genuinely enjoy ur takes on every single one of the muses that you have & the threads that i've read over like an invested audience member <3

@ofsavior: “(ෆ ͒•∘̬• ͒)◞” + I really like the way you incorporate both canon and headcanon in a pretty seamless fashion. It shows you’ve put a lot of consideration into your portrayals!

@korinthiakos: 🌟 ― i love how you portray your muse(s) 🎀 ― i love your aesthetic / graphics 💯 ― your headcanon posts are always on point ✨ ― i love the way you write 💫 ― i enjoy writing with you 😊 ― i enjoy talking to you 💖 ― you seem like a genuinely nice person ☀️ ― your posts always bring me joy ❤️ ― you're one of my favorite blogs 🌺 ― simply admiring you from afar - it's pretty much just ALL OF THEM. ALL THE NICENESS. SHOWERING YOU ALL THE LOVE. THEN RUNNING AWAY TO ADMIRE AFAR

anonymous: You are valuable, you matter. Everyone has days that are hard, or even months or years, but things will get better. This message is to remind you that you are worthwhile and you are remarkable and capable. Remember that you have made it through much more than you thought you could. Pass this message on to ten followers to help them, too!

anonymous, @trattcria, @goldshadows, @fortislumen: ☆ Put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. It's time to spread positivity!!!!

@fatalelity: Send to 10 other bloggers you think are wonderful. Keep this going to make someone smile. ☆♥

@lghtyear: hello i feel very compelled to tell you how much i love you and your blog!! it's been so lush having you back on my dash and being blessed by your talent again! not only are you such a brilliant person, your characterisations are always brilliant and informed, and your writing is such a joy to read!! make sure you drink water and have a tasty little snack! look after yourself !! 🤍

[madfaithconnections]

Channeled Relationship Message: The Big Bang & Your Relationship

 I am picking up on an energy that is a lot like Leonard and Penny's relationship in the TV show The Big Bang Theory. I will be using their relationship story to give a visual aspect to this channeled message. If you haven't seen The Big Bang… What are you doing with your life? Seriously you need HBO Max and need to watch all 13 seasons pretty much immediately… That is a message for someone specific I get the feeling.

So, much like Leonard and Penny, (Big Bang Theory)  you may be struggling with a relationship right now—maybe romantic, maybe platonic, or even the relationship you have with yourself. Either way, it feels like this connection is in a constant loop of missed timing and shaky confidence.

You might both have moments where one person is all in while the other doubts themselves. Maybe it’s one person feeling out of their league, like Leonard did with Penny, thinking, “Am I enough?” At the same time, the other person might feel insecure in different ways, feeling they don’t measure up intellectually, or they’re not good enough. It’s this push-pull dynamic, both people quietly holding back because they

they don’t measure up for the other.

What’s really blocking you both is this subtle lack of confidence on both sides, creating a disconnect between two people who are, at their core, perfect for each other. It’s ironic—you’re both like puzzle pieces that fit together perfectly but never quite align because of fears, doubts, and all those assumptions that come creeping in.

Think of how Leonard proposed twice, only to be turned down. Sometimes it feels like it would be easier to just give up on trying to make this work as a relationship and keep it simple as friends. But there’s this magnetic pull that won’t let you go. It’s confusing and intense, making you wonder if the timing will ever be right.

And here’s the thing about divine timing: it’s real, even when it feels impossible to believe. You’ll keep revisiting this connection until you both learn to let go of the assumptions and expectations you think the other person has. Once you release what you think you know about their opinion of you, you’ll see the reality for what it is—a relationship full of potential that only falters under the weight of self-doubt.

It’s likely you’ll both go through this cycle repeatedly until that lightbulb moment hits, where you finally realize that the only thing getting in the way is… you. Both of you, actually. You’re each seeing something valuable in the other, but your egos are creating blind spots, letting self-doubt overshadow the genuine admiration and love between you.

With the Detective card reversed, the Imposter card, and the lightbulb moment all in reverse, it’s like you’re missing the bigger picture. Your ego is focused on assumptions, thinking, “They must think I’m not enough.” But look at the actions—day in and day out, they’re showing up, proving you’re not out of their league at all. You both make each other nervous, but that’s the thing about something meaningful: it’s supposed to challenge you, to make you grow.

Let this be a reminder: you’re not lacking anything in their eyes, and they likely feel like they’re the ones who fall short. It’s time to see the real story here. You’re perfectly matched, and if this is meant to be, it will be—just as soon as you recognize that you’ve been enough all along.

FYI: I didn't take pictures of the cards that I pulled to receive this channeled message. I do apologize.

If this resonated with you and you need further guidance, check out my Etsy Shop. Click Here.

There is a promo code for my Tumblr fam and it is valid through 11/06/2024 PROMO CODE - TUMLR75 for 75% discount at checkout.

LOVE YOU SO MUCH BYEEEE!

[evelhak]

It's a bit late because it took me a while to figure out what I wanted to post about, but here are my

Fandom Wishes for the New Year

Disclaimer: these are purposefully written in a way that might evoke difficult feelings in people. If you're not in a good headspace for being self-critical, it might be better not to read this list right now. None of these points were inspired by a particular person, so if you feel like you recognise yourself in some of them, and you're in my circles, it was not a message directed at you, and doesn't imply that I have any negative feelings towards you. These are all based on general human nature, and I'm only pointing that out because I know social anxiety is pretty common among Tumblr users, and I want to reassure you that this is not secretly about you personally.

A little introduction note:

If any of these wishes spark feelings of resistance or defensiveness in you, I wish that you would not disregard them, because it's likely that the points that cause those feelings are the exact ones you would benefit from working on.

This is not from me to fandom as if I know everything and do things correctly. I am part of fandom and these are as much from me to me as they can be from you to you, if you want. God knows I know which ones here I need to work on right now, and there are probably things I haven't even noticed.

I wrote these things because so many of us spend a lot of the year criticising other people in fandom and talking about the stuff we don't like seeing in it, or affirming that the things we like to do in fandom are valuable, (which are important discussions) but it's not as common to see visible attempts to work on ourselves, to recognise what we could personally do better ourselves to make fandom a better place for everyone.

This is for that purpose. Because pointing fingers is so much easier than looking in the mirror. Because there is no one in fandom who does everything right or everything wrong. We can always do better and a very small improvement can send out big waves.

If you start reading this list just to affirm yourself that you're already doing enough in regards to all of these things, please come back later.

If while reading this list, you notice yourself focusing on how you know people who would benefit from thinking about any of these things, please come back later.

This is not for congratulating yourself or judging anyone else. This is intended as a self-development tool. If you can't first (and continuously) face yourself with genuine humility, your opinions about other people are not going promote genuine acceptance and cooperation because even if you're right about something you're placing yourself above others, not as one of them.

This is not a feel-good list. Growth is painful and everyone has fragile points in their ego.

This is also not an "everything is wrong here" declaration. This list is an attempt to point out things that can help when things go wrong, but it is also intended to help before things go wrong.

Please, remember that finding things you could work on, does not mean that you aren't already a valued and loved participant in fandom.

I also think it might be helpful to make sure you're not distracted or in a vulnerable state before you go on.

Thank you for sharing fandom and I hope you can find something useful here.

Fandom Wishes

for anyone it may concern

🌱 May you seek connection with someone you have negative feelings towards and work to get past those feelings in yourself

🌱 May you appreciate any work for what it is instead of complaining about what it isn't

🌱 May you engage with a format or genre of fic/art that makes you feel difficult feelings for one reason or another

🌱 May you fall in love with an idea you used to despise

🌱 May you give a genuine compliment to someone you are envious of

🌱 May you engage with a side of fandom in direct opposition to yours with true, instead of performed respect

🌱 May you remember that truly objective interpretation of a work does not exist (no, not even "the literal" one)

🌱 May you rejoice in being one of the many

🌱 May you find freedom in being one of the few

🌱 May you suspend your disbelief when you have a "vampires don't sparkle" type of moment

🌱 May your love be stronger than your pride when receiving constructive criticism (directly or indirectly)

🌱 May you find joy in genuinely appreciating a headcanon or other take that directly contradicts yours

🌱 May you find gold in imperfections

🌱 May you learn from people you feel aren't as smart as you

🌱 May you not punish people you feel are smarter than you, for being human

🌱 May you look beyond the presentation of something to appreciate its core and meaning

🌱 May you catch yourself when you're about to engage in "Be yourself -no, not like that" type of behaviour

🌱 May you take a step back before responding in anger

🌱 May you stop yourself from using freedom of expression as an excuse to be mean or uncaring

🌱 May you stop yourself from guilt tripping people to engage with your work

🌱 May you resist the urge to correct someone who is having harmless fun while not caring about facts

🌱 May you resist the urge to share unsolicited advice on someone's vent post

🌱 May you give more unprompted compliments

🌱 May you engage in more collaborative work in any way you could find meaning in

🌱 May you jump into the unknown and do the things you secretly regret missing the opportunities for

🌱 May you talk your issues out in private when you feel the urge to vague-post about someone you know on Tumblr

🌱 May you refrain from deciding "they're idiots" when you spot a trend you don't like, and dig into fandom history to find out why the trend exists instead

🌱 May you remember that acknowledging that you are mean, judgemental or too critical of others doesn't give you a free pass to continue to do so

🌱 May you win over your shyness, insecurities or fear of being part of something in case you get hurt

🌱 May you do the things you tell yourself don't matter, to make yourself feel better about not doing them

🌱 May you accept that you don't own your interests, and seek connection instead of withdrawing from others

🌱 May you remember that bigger, higher, more, different, unique, scientific, objective, eloquent, detailed, layered, stronger, etc. are not things that inherently make something more valuable than another thing

🌱 May you find good things about characters you dislike

🌱 May you find depth in characters you didn't think had any, possibly with the help of someone particularly interested in the character

🌱 May you learn to ask "Why would the author do this?" in curiosity instead of anger

🌱 May you notice when your initially valid criticism of a popular trend turns to illogical hate

🌱 May you notice when your initially valid criticism of a niche turns to ignorance

🌱 May you create something about an element in canon or fanon that you have deemed unimportant

🌱 May you internalise the idea that curating your online experience includes expanding it sometimes

🌱 May you engage in something silly if you gravitate towards serious content

🌱 May you engage in something heavier if you gravitate towards light-hearted content

🌱 May you remember that your appreciation of someone's creations should not come with strings attached

🌱 May you look for new and unrecognised fan creations and uplift them to keep fandom striving

🌱 May your "Where did you come from?" reaction to new people in fandom be filled with love and curiosity instead of suspicion and exclusion

🌱 May you understand that someone else's success is not the reason for your feelings of failure

🌱 May you remember that putting others down does not elevate you

🌱 May you understand that someone not needing what you wish to give is not about you

🌱 May you recognise the difference between feeling threatened by someone because of them and because of you

🌱 May you remember that the pursuit of objective truth is not valuable in all fandom activities

🌱 May you understand that someone moving on to a new interest or new fandom is not a betrayal of you

🌱 May you accept that sometimes you have to confront the difficult things in fandom and yourself, and it's not because you shouldn't have fun, it's so you can keep having fun

🌱 May you understand that freedom of expression doesn't mean lack of consequences

🌱 May you consider that offence may not be the best defence when you're dealing with people you share a valuable interest with

🌱 May you remember that feeling sorry for yourself because you made a mistake and withdrawing because of your guilt is not helping anyone

🌱 May you accept that you are going to leave a footprint in fandom no matter how insignificant you think you are, so your actions matter for better and worse

🌱 May you show more active curiousity towards people's creations instead of sitting back and waiting for what they post next

🌱 If you want to see something, an idea, a change, anything, be the first to do it or suggest it

End note:

If any of the points listed make you go "But-" "What about-" "This doesn't apply to me because-", please stop. The purpose of these wishes is not to apply them to every situation you can think of. For example, to engage with a person you have negative feelings about does not imply you should engage with a person who has been abusive to you. It only means it's your job to find where it applies for you, where can you, in particular, work on your prejudices against people and be more open to others.

If you are reading any of these wishes from the point of view of "cases in which these things would not apply" you're willingly misinterpreting them. They are meant to be viewed from the perspective of "cases in which these things could be helpful and applicable to me personally".

None of these wishes are implying that criticism is bad or that you shouldn't have preferences. Neither are any of them implying that you should abandon something in case someone gets upset, or that you're not allowed to have fun or express yourself in your own way. Not all of these wishes are intended to be equally meaningful to every person. We all have different weaknesses and different points of growth.

These wishes are simply prompts you can use to find those personal instances in which you specifically could be kinder, more open, more humble, more fair, more responsible and more welcoming towards your community.

It's so common to hear "you don't owe anything to anyone". No, you don't owe these things to anyone. There's no law or rule that forces you to work on yourself to create a healthier community. But every time I hear this type of thinking, I can't help but think: Wouldn't you want to, though? Wouldn't you want to do things for everyone, not out of obligation, but out of love instead? Wouldn't you want to go the extra mile for someone else if you could, even if they couldn't?

I know I do. That's why, every time I find myself feeling unhappy, insecure, hateful, jealous, dismissive, misunderstood, lonely, bitter, resentful, scared, hurt, or discouraged, I'm going to come back to this list, or anything that has a similar effect, and I'm going to figure out what I can do to fix things.

No matter how good or bad your last year in fandom was, I hope that this one is going to be better. These are just some things to encourage it. ✨

Please, consider reblogging this for other people. 💙

[seelestia]

Analyzing word choice is a hobby I've had since I was 12 (song lyrics>>>). Here are my favorite sentences from your latest work and why (all statements are /srs /gen unless stated otherwise).

BUT FIRST! A message from our sponsor:

Mirei Has the Vocabulary of a 6th Grader (aka words that impressed me):

• Plentitude

• Relish

• Grime

• Pristine

• Cognizant (what does this one mean????)

• Innocuous (imma have to pull out Google...)

• Languidly (the longer this list grows, the more I feel humbled 😔 /j)

• Nefarious (IK WHAT THIS ONE MEANS... I think ._.)

BACK TO OUR REGULAR PROGRAMMING :P

Aventurine:

• "Sure, the pillows are extremely comfy but he always has a preference for things with much, much more value."

When I read this line I SQUEALED bro finds me more valuable than a pillow I'm FLATTERED !!

• "His witty quips are as feather-light in weight as light-hearted they are in intent."

Connecting the lightness of his remarks because they're not serious to the lightness of his heart because he feels content and playful SO GENIUS OMG

• *That whole angsty flashback leading up to this sentence* "Although he deems himself unworthy, an ugly grime on your pristine existence that still insists on cradling him --- but despite it all, he finds this last melody to be his favorite so far."

I'm imagining a rust stain on a glimmering silver vase and I just *heart breaks* NO AVENTURINE YOUR THE POLISH THAT LET'S ME SHINE ON BRIGHTER DAYS.

The consistent days of bliss and peace brought on by the love your life after years of unrest and turmoil. It is similar to the last chorus of a sad song, isn't it? Carrying a lighter tone than the earlier verses, an ending happier than he thought he ever deserved (PLEASE I LOVE ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING MUSIC RELATED 😭)

• This whole paragraph: "the light of noon greets your eyes... Penacony's limited edition perfume kisses your nose."

Tell me why I could PHYSICALLY feel every sensation omg Lia your descriptions are so VIVID

• "...instead, aventurine's arms reestablish their hold on you. Hooking you closer to him as if to wring out whatever proximity is left..."

i LOVE this line lemme tell you why cuz we often hear/read proximity being "squeezed" out until space becomes "tight" but metaphors become weaker the more they are used and yet you EXPERTLY AVOIDED THAT BY USING A VERY SIMILAR BUT DISTINCT VERB ("wring out") WHICH KEEPS THE ORIGINAL MEANING BUT GIVES IT A SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT IMAGE (I could grasp the utter *extent* to which there was no space between us cuz it felt like he had twisted every last drop of air out from a towel) THUS MAINTAINING THE IMPACT OF THE METAPHOR !! I'm probably reading WAY too much into this BUT I CAN'T HELP IT IT'S UNIQUE AND EFFECTIVE AND PERFECT !!!

• "Aventurine knows [you can never be too stern with him], yes, and he gives you an A+ for effort each time."

*GIGGLES* <---- me anytime I receive validation, even if it's from a fanfic (PLEASE praise me/hj)

• "He has half a mind to pinch his skin, as if to remind himself that this is real. He can feel your giggles tickling his skin as if to tell him in return: yes, you are."

Odelia I cannot exaggerate when I say this line made me fall in love with him. Perfect way to end his part.

I couldn't do the writing for the other characters cuz this is SO MUCH LONGER THAN I ANTICIPATED BUT IT WAS SO WORTH IT !!

Truthfully I had thoughts on EVERY SINGLE SENTENCE, it genuinely feels like every word was carefully considered and I loved all of it. You really outdid yourself with this fic and clearly MANY other people agree (THE AMOUNT OF NOTES OMG) oke gonna go study for my pre calc exam see ya !! ^•^

[ in reference to this! ]

mirei.... UR JUST LIKE ME FR! /pos. i also like analyzing and annotating my fav books!!! so to have it done for me makes me wanna sob happy tears. i'm glad it helped broaden ur vocab! english isn't my first language either so it's nice that we get to trade new words together ‹3

( yapping abt my thought process while writing aven's part in i'll show you (if you'll let me). under the cut 🙏 )

extra: speaking of innocuous!! that paragraph was one of my favs in aventurine's part. i used that specific word bcs he knows that u don't really mean it / are actually that annoyed when ur pushing his face away - so it's harmless and doesn't offend him in any way, thus considered innocuous!

moving on to ur delightful commentary !!! LOL if ur flattered, then his goal is a success. the man's a sneaky flirt even in his inner monologue... ur falling for his inescapable charms 😔 /j

THANK U! i was a little proud of that line bcs there is a nuance in meanings despite the presence of “light” in both feather-light and light-hearted. and i wanted to tie them together !! sososo, thank u for noticing aaaa ‹3

LMAOOO the way u simplified the angsty flashback pfft. hoyoverse dumped a bucket of angst in the mixing pot when they designed him 💔 a personal take on aventurine: he thinks of his past as ashes from a flame on the verge of going out (it's him, he's the flame). he doesn't think of it as a burden, rather as a symbol of the innocence he once had. he is content with bearing those ashes using his own hands. but when someone learns of it, tries to hold his hand through it, he can't help but feel like his ash-stained palm will ruin the purity yours has.

AWWW thanks :'( i still think my skills in terms of describing realistic stuff (compared to abstract emotions LOL) are lacking, but it's smth i'm trying to work on. +++ did u know? the penacony's limited edition perfume is a reference to an official skit abt aventurine's timeline! u can find it here.

it's like a towel. u gotta wring out every single drop of water left until there's none - except the water droplets are a replacement for personal space. it's giving “this is mc, they like their personal space. this is aventurine, he also likes mc's personal space.” energy LMAO. i hc him as clingy in the morning with his messy bedhead and groggy voice... (<- can't continue otherwise i'll melt at the domesticity)

THIS SMUG MAN !!!! ahem, he may or may not be patronizing us but that's ok. it's a compliment and he means it ‹3

THANK U AGAIN ( ;´ - `;) one thing abt me is that i loveeee writing the ending in my works. it's one of my fav parts to write. i treat it as an opportunity to either tie everything up nicely or do a smart & ironic callback or to put in a revelation / monologue that leaves me feeling smth after i proofread it. bcs if i feel smth from reading that then hopefully, it'll make my readers feel smth too.

^^ ANYWAY back to the context of the point above: i find that ending line to be heart-wrenching??? in a bittersweet way. this ending line also ties back to a line in an earlier paragraph: [ you question whether it could be nostalgia or instead, silent awe at a reality he never imagined could ever be his. ]! so u could say that in aventurine's part, the concept of his disbelief - over having you as a source of happiness in his life; is it truly a reality and not a dream? (and being reassured by you that this is, in fact, a reality) - is somewhat consistent in the background. it is intentional ><

NONONO, THANK U!!! this analysis has so much thought put into it and that alone is beyond enough for a silly little writer like me. i can't even express how much it matters to me that u took the time to write this and tell me ur thoughts! it's the best kind of feedback a writer can ever receive 🤍 having my writing get annotated.... i'm truly living the dream!!! T_T

[malorisaurus]

Last night, I finally finished Lucifer (Netflix). It took me quite a long time to make my way through the series—a couple of years. I would have periods of binge, and then long breaks when I reached critical mass of the specific types of shenanigans in the show. I think I have concluded that repetitive behaviors can cause me frustration, even if they are leading to an interesting and valuable place. The lack of communication or Lucifer's regressions would sometimes become too much for me, or plot elements (like Cain) would fall into narrative elements that I just did not care for.

That said, it is unusual for me to have this feeling but keep coming back to a show. Even more unusual is for me to feel the incredible love I felt for the characters that I had in the final season and the series finale.

All of the behaviors made the outcomes very rewarding to me, and even though I was initially irritated by the time-traveling angel daughter, it actually became one of the most impactful parts of the show for me. Don't get me wrong, I do have to just gloss over some problematic self-sacrificial stuff, so I am not without my criticisms. But it doesn't really matter, in the end. They wrote a show that managed to be true to all of the characters, deliver on what was promised and then some, and created a found family that I genuinely loved.

More than that, I am struck by how long it took me to get through this show because it is difficult to look at the circumstances surrounding this exact moment and not feel that it was kismet—truly well and good "meant to happen right in this moment" shit.

You see, I have been in therapy for the past two years largely to deal with the fallout of my abusive, narcissistic father "punishing" me by ostracizing my sister and I out of our family which led to our mutual decision to ultimately go no-contact with him. The way I described it to my therapist was that staying in contact with my dad let me feel like I had some measure of control—I gave him what he wanted out of me and our relationship, and then he would proceed to not give me a single thought. I could control encountering him because I knew what to say to keep myself safe (to an extent). He showed me pretty quickly after no-contact what he thought of that by showing up at mine and my sister's doorstep unannounced to not speak to us but leave random shit as some sort of message, or he would drive by when we were visiting my grandmother and wait for us to see him and then drive away. It quickly unmoored me. You see, not speaking to him meant that I no longer knew where he was, so he could be anywhere, so I was afraid of everywhere.

This is relevant to watching this last season of Lucifer because Lucifer Morningstar has a lot of narcissistic behaviors, but his growth is also profound. He has to grapple with the fact that everyone is telling him who he is (the devil that abandons his family), and even though he has his moments of doubt, he ultimately says to people, "No, I would NEVER do that" and it is the truth. I watched the devil grapple with himself, become defensive and blame his child for the simple fact that she was speaking her truth, and then come to realize that the past (future) is the past (future) and that all he could do was be better now.

Lately in therapy, I have been grappling with a particularly difficult period of my life—the time-period I would say where my enmeshment with my father really became solidified. She [therapist] is constantly probing and cautioning me to make sure that I am not "story-telling"—essentially catering to my traumas by telling a narrative about the circumstances (like ascribing motive and intention to behaviors of other people when I can't know those things). I have been struggling to internalize this, to be honest. It is difficult to let go of the stories that helped one survive, because for many of us in abusive circumstances, these stories are the only thing protecting us. I have been regressing emotionally as a result of these therapy sessions to a depression similar to what I experienced then at 15, and I have had difficulty letting it go. It has been hard to grapple with the fact that much of my identity and how I think about myself was forged within that 15 year old and is relevant today. To let go of those things then would mean I would also have to let go of them now, and it is human nature to be self-protective.

And this is where the last season of Lucifer comes into play. I have watched it entirely over the past week, after a session where my therapist really honed in on this story-telling I was doing in a way that really made me see how it was not serving me. And to be honest, I was filled with grief at knowing I needed to let it go. There is a grief to letting go of your rage.

And I was sitting there, watching Lucifer show up for his daughter and choosing to be better than he even believed himself to be. Choosing to believe that he was deserving of love and knowing that he had love to give. He self-actualized because it was important to him to be a good father. He chose Rory over and over again, and I honestly wept harder than I have in a long time, entirely unexpectedly.

Rory's rage and her arc to understanding was also just incredibly impactful to me in this period of vulnerability. She is so wrapped up in her own narrative of why her father left her that she was filled with anger. It colored her whole life, and the bitterness dramatically impacted her. But in the end, that was all just a story that she was telling herself. Now, not to compare the circumstances of this particular narrative with the actions of my own father. Objectively, his actions were not great! Regardless, I am telling stories about his motivations and even his intent because that was my perception of them. There is no way to know those things. And even though I intellectually understood that concept, it solidified it seeing it play out in Rory in the context of her relationship with her father.

In this, it was extremely evident that it was vital to leave the past in the past. Rehashing the past is often an exercise in defensiveness and being protective of one’s trauma. There is no making amends for the past. Forgiveness isn’t about amends. There is only how we choose to move forward. That may include being apologetic, but I think that the point is that to move forward there has to be simple acknowledgement of the past and that the reality of it is different for every person. To shape a relationship going forward simple things have to be in place—lack of judgement, security in vulnerability, honesty, openness, and an intention to do no harm. Literally the basics of human interaction, but surprisingly difficult in certain contexts. If the past is not owned, then it will just be repeated. But rehashing the past only makes it live in the present, and each present moment into infinity. Holding onto trauma isn’t the way out.

Ultimately, I never expected to be so moved by my silly little devil show, but it is truly this power of fiction that constantly floors me. I owe so much to books, film, and television. I have, over the course of my entire cognizance, contextualized and learned how to understand the world around me through these mediums. As an Autist, it was a touchstone for me in a way that I cannot adequately describe. And here I am again, a whole ass adult, having therapy breakthroughs because of Lucifer Morningstar.* Linda would be so proud.

___

*The therapy in this show is also very funny to me. I am actually not a huge proponent of therapy, even though I talk extensively about my own therapy pursuits here. The depiction of therapy in the show is (I think accidentally) an accurate representation of the therapeutic experience. Lucifer comes to therapy with extreme bias, a tendency to very obviously and conveniently misremember details to suit his narrative, and a propensity to steamroll Linda (his therapist turned friend and mother of his nephew) by either willfully misunderstanding her guidance or ignoring it entirely because he is avoiding his emotions.

The effectiveness of therapy is only as good as what the patient brings to it. And Lucifer does ultimately wind up thinking about what is brought up in therapy after making some rash blunders in reaction to confronting something emotionally uncomfortable, and I think that is an honest representation of how therapy goes for many people. A therapist is only privy to the information given by the patient, and has some tools to ask questions and offer differences in perspective. But ultimately, if the patient lies, withholds, and disregards, the therapist will not be effective. Even in the show, the way they got around the therapist not knowing that Lucifer is doing these things (aside from his obvious traits: selfishness, a flair for the dramatic, daddy issues, persecution complex) is the fact that Linda is close with every person that is important to Lucifer. She literally knows the details, so he can’t get away with misrepresenting them to her. It is fascinating to me that a show can show how therapy is simultaneously very flawed but also sometimes still effective.

[acourtofthought]

I know I shouldn't let anyone sway my opinion about characters but I think you're one of the few people that make me like elain. I was fairly indifferent when I first read the series for the first time and just waiting for her book before making any real judgements, but she's been so thoroughly butchered by e/riels that I haven't liked her for a good long while. Your meta and genuine love of her character is so refreshing and one of the few things that keep me sane in this wacky fandom for real.

I love messages like this ❤️

And I agree, Elain's character is probably the most twisted of any character across the board. Some turn her into a completely unrecognizable version of herself where she's basically a carbon copy of Feyre / Nesta even though we're continually told she's different. They call her Kingslayer and have her wearing tattoos strapped to her thigh in Illyrian leathers though she herself did not want credit for killing the King, did not want to wear the leathers and gave the dagger back (without looking back). To me that all means that through SJM, we're told Elain is choosing a different life for herself. Some claim "well Nesta didn't want to train either" but they miss how despite Nesta's words, everything hinted that being the direction she was going. "Why do I need to train at all?" yet she turns around and wears the leathers. She turns around and takes a dagger with no fuss. Rhys tells us that Elain is Elain but Nesta is Illyrian at heart. Nesta walked over and cut off the kings head BEFORE her book (violent, right?) while as of SF, cruelty still bothers Elain. Elain stabbed the king to stop him from hurting her sister but she didn't have that loathing in her heart the way Nesta did, the way that made Nesta want to make him suffer and cause it to be as bloody and violent as possible. Some think that just because Rhys tells us Elain is ready to get her hands dirty that equals violence but they are two completely different things. There's a way to be involved without having to torture and wield weapons, without having to hurt others.

Then there's those that have turned her into a villain who deserves to be killed off even though SJM has confirmed numerous times on numerous occasions that Elain will have her own book (and she doesn't give villains books). That Elain has a similar energy to SJM herself. Others still think she's the exact same as SJM wrote her in book 1 when she initially thought the sisters would be the stereotypical antagonistic (step)sisters from a fairytale though she's done a complete 180 since ACOTAR when Feyre once said that it probably never occurred to Elain that she could get her hands dirty. But here we are as of SF having Elain offer to search for the Trove when even Nesta was too scared to do it. Where we have Elain putting Nesta in her place for thinking she gets to tell Elain what she's allowed to do with her own body. Where even after that, we see her laughing hysterically when Nesta tells her to fuck off. She's now got FMC energy without coming off as being too much a part of the IC (if SJM wrote it where she was so valuable and involved, we wouldn't be picking up on the clues that she's meant to end up elsewhere).

She learns from her past mistakes, accepts blame for her part in things, and she doesn't hold grudges but is now someone who can call someone out when they're they're wrong, then moves on.

"Moves on". That's another thing that bothers me about E/riels. Az told her she was a mistake and she returned his necklace (a strong message) yet they think she's still secretly harboring feelings for him and pining for him. The guy called her a mistake with no explanation (he said this BEFORE he spoke to Rhys, not after), yet they think Elain is sneaking around having some sort of forbidden romance with him? After Solstice and after Rhys and Feyre almost died?! Az has not done right by Elain. He was unwilling to tell Rhys that he was over Mor for Elain. He was unwilling to say anything he liked about her to Rhys. He had no plans for how he might actually be with Elain considering his thoughts of her hadn't gone further than his sexual fantasies. He couldn't convince Rhys he didn't just want her for sex. He said that if he returned to the River House and did something with her it would be something he'd regret (yes, because a girl always feels awesome when a guy regrets being with her). That's the kind of guy they think Elain should be with? To me, they don't like Elain all that much if that's the case.

In general, I think a lot of who Elain is goes unnoticed because she's got such a quiet way of dealing with things but it takes an incredible amount of maturity to not blame others for the bad things that happen to you and I love that about Elain.

She probably lost the most when she was made because she really loved her life in the human lands and was in love while neither Feyre or Nesta cared all that much about the people there yet not once did she blame Feyre the way Nesta did. Not once did she blame Nesta for not protecting her though Nesta beat herself up over not being able to do anything. And while she once told Lucien, "you betrayed us", to which he replies that it was a mistake, she turned around and invited him to come live in Velaris after the war. Also, she loved her father more than Feyre or Nesta ever did yet again, she never blamed anyone but the King for what happened. Maybe we'll come to find she harbors her own guilt over it when she gets her POV but she's not taking it out on anyone.

She's quietly but steadily been growing since book 1 but it's consistent and really noticeable if you pay her character attention. She hasn't even had her book yet she's evolved so much, I really look forward to her "final" transformation and I think she's ready. Amren said she's ready, Rhys said she's ready. Feyre, difficult as it was to ask Elain to put herself in danger, did so in SF and also said they'd be helping her after helping Nesta. Now we just have to see it happen in her own book, something that finally gets her out of the NC so she can finally find where she's meant to be and with the people who will help push her the rest of the way.

[farmerlesbian]

I just wanted to say that as a lesbian who hasn't been able to find a place in the butch and femme dynamic herself so has been happy to just be a dyke fullstop, I'm so happy that your blog exists and you're so positive about all lesbians. I love butches and femmes and I'm so happy that those relationships exist but always known that I don't really resonate with either role. And often because a lot of lesbian tumblr is focused on that (rightfully so) it can feel like I don't belong or that I'd have to pretend I'm something I'm not. I'm more feminine in style (but femme is so much more than presentation) but my preferences in how I show love and how I want to want to show love has always felt more butch but I know I'd never be seen as either. It can be a confusing place to be but your blog makes me feel like there is a place somewhere and there will be someone who gets it

oh anon i cannot say how much i appreciate your messages, thank you :') 🥺😭 it's probably just because i'm Going Thru It hormonally rn but this made me tear up when i read it yesterday. i really DO want to make all different lesbians n dykes feel seen and appreciated and valued and like we belong!!!

i don't think our personal styles or music preferences or age or location or whatever should separate us. i don't want us to be split by such superficial things like aesthetic or whatever. we are stronger when we are connected and united. we don't need to agree on everything, and it's cool to have subcultures and niches by all means!! i genuinely mean that it is cool and i love it. we gotta be able to also appreciate what we have in common even with people we wouldn't necessarily be besties with. that's what solidarity means that's what community means, at least to me.

i realize i'm not really talking about butch / femme here, to be clear, i'm thinking more broadly right now and more about other subcultures and aesthetics and types of dykes/lesbians/sapphics/etc. i kind of got off track, but you get what i'm sayin i think.

in regards to butch and femme, i think we would all benefit from chillin out a bit. if it fits it fits, if it doesn't fit you then it doesn't, no big deal! these are like real and valuable terms/identities/labels/roles and for many butches n femmes, a bit sacred honestly. nobody benefits from trying to figure out / apply / fit into one or the other to every dyke. those who are butch or femme are wonderful, and the rest of the lesbians who aren't either one are so wonderful just as well! it's that simple.

i appreciate you thank you it means a lot to me 💜🌹

[dragonflight203]

Mass Effect 2 replay, Miranda’s loyalty mission:

-This is why Miranda should have told Shepard Oriana’s age. Finding out from mercenaries was one of the worst possible times. It could easily have resulted in Shepard opposing Miranda.

-Merc Leader, Miranda’s deal is fairly obvious. She said that Oriana and her share DNA, just not a birthday. Even if you don’t go to genetic twins, it’s obvious they’re family.

-Miranda was the first one her father kept. Why? And why did he plan to replace her with Oriana?

This is never made clear. Her father apparently put her under a great deal of pressure, but to do or be what isn’t spelled out. Miranda herself says she doesn’t know what she was to him.

There are some extremely negative conclusions one can draw, but they are not strongly suggested enough for me to feel confident they’re the intended message. Just hinted at.

And whatever it is, it wasn’t bad enough for Niket to feel it justified taking Oriana away. Or possibly he didn’t know the full story, and Miranda assumed what he knew was enough.

-Miranda: I couldn’t let my father do to her what he did to me. So I rescued her.

Do what Miranda? What? Give me details!

Fine, I’m not entitled to details but ME2’s insistence on vagueness everywhere is becoming grating.

-Oriana is 19. Why is everyone referring to her as a child?

Except for Miranda, who specifies to Shepard that she isn’t a child.

What is the age of adulthood for humans in Mass Effect? Google is not helping me. I want to say it’s younger than 18 – 16? - but I don’t think it’s ever stated in the games.

Either way, Oriana is to damn old to be “returned” to her father.

-The early part of the mission really hammers in that Miranda trusts Niket completely.

By this point the player should know that Miranda does not trust lightly, and from the mission itself it’s obvious how important Oriana is to Miranda. So it’s made obvious that Niket’s betrayal will hurt Miranda deeply.

-The mercenaries may genuinely believe they’re the good guys in this mission. They’re “rescuing” a girl who was kidnapped as a baby by a woman with Ceberus. That’s not a hard sell.

Doesn’t keep them from shooting civilians, but there’s only so much you can ask of Eclipse.

-And on that note: Niket may genuinely feel betrayed by Miranda. He helped Miranda get away from her father. He kept her secrets all these years.

But she never trusted him with her secrets. Not her sister, not that she’s with Cerberus.

He accuses her of stealing Oriana to get back at her father. Is he returning Oriana to get back at Miranda?

And considering Miranda’s with Cerberus, he might believe that Oriana is better off with Miranda’s father. Cerberus is pretty damn evil. Niket may view Miranda’s father as the lesser evil.

-Niket places a lot of emphasis on money. That Miranda’s father has money, that Miranda used to take his money, that he knows what it’s like to be poor…

I feel there’s some context missing that would clarify some of Niket’s actions.

-Miranda places a lot of emphasis on that she rescued Oriana. She says that over and over again.

If seems to be core to her self identity: She is a person that rescued her sister. She needs that to be true. If it’s not, she’d have to reevalute herself. So anything that challenges that must be swatted down immediately.

-Miranda, about Oriana: Shes safe.. with her family.

Notably, she’s excluding herself from that statement. Oriana is Miranda’s family, but Miranda isn’t Oriana’s family.

Which is true. Oriana doesn’t know Miranda exists.

And it says a lot about Miranda – she’ll do anything for her sister, and she’s not expecting anything in her return. That’s very admirable.

It’s just a damn shame that Cerberus scooped her up when she was vulnerable and convinced her to join them. She’d make a terror as a spectre.

-The mission summary says that Oriana will be placed under observation only because Miranda’s too valuable to Cerberus and Oriana is the easiest way to keep her loyal.

And we all know it turns out in ME3 once Miranda stops being loyal to Cerberus...

[essoproperties]

WHY BUILDING LONG TERM RELATIONSHIPS POST SALE IS YOUR SECRET WEAPON

In real estate, closing a sale shouldn’t be the end of the journey, but rather it should be the beginning of a lasting relationship. Building a strong post-sale connection with clients ensures repeat business, referrals, and a stellar reputation in the market. Maintaining these relationships requires a proactive and personal approach, creating a sense of trust and loyalty long after the deal is done.

Why Post-Sale Relationships Matter

Referrals and Repeat BusinessSatisfied clients become your strongest advocates, recommending you to friends and family.

Boosts ReputationA consistent track record of strong client relationships enhances your credibility in the market.

Lifetime ValueA single client could lead to multiple transactions over time, both directly and through their network.

Effective Strategies for Maintaining Post-Sale Relationships

1. Express Genuine Gratitude

Send a personalized thank-you message or gift after the sale. Make it heartfelt, whether it’s a handwritten note or a token of appreciation.

2. Stay in Touch Regularly

Set reminders to check in periodically, whether it’s a simple text, email, or phone call. Use significant dates like home anniversaries or holidays to reconnect.

3. Provide Ongoing Support

Offer assistance with post-sale needs like contractor recommendations or moving services. Share tips on home maintenance or market trends that could be valuable to them.

4. Leverage Social Media

Connect with clients on platforms like LinkedIn, Instagram, or Facebook. Celebrate their milestones, such as birthdays or homeownership anniversaries, with a congratulatory post.

5. Organize Client Appreciation Events

Host gatherings like holiday parties, webinars, or local meetups to stay connected. Make clients feel part of an exclusive community.

6. Create a Client Loyalty Program

Offer perks for repeat business or referrals, such as discounts, free consultations, or exclusive services.

7. Share Valuable Content

Send newsletters with market updates, local news, or helpful homeownership tips. Tailor content to their interests to stay relevant and helpful.

8. Be Their Real Estate Resource

Position yourself as their go-to expert for all things real estate, even after the sale. Share insights on property value appreciation, refinancing options, or investment opportunities.

9. Celebrate Their Success

Congratulate them on milestones, like paying off their mortgage or renovating their home. Use these occasions as an opportunity to rekindle your connection.

10. Solicit Feedback and Act on It

Ask for their input on your services through surveys or informal conversations. Use their feedback to improve your processes and demonstrate that their opinion matters.

At the Realtors Millionaire Summit 2025, you’ll discover advanced strategies for fostering client loyalty and maximizing your network's potential. Elevate your career by learning from industry leaders!

About the Managing Director : Dr. Smith Ezenagu is the Managing Director and Chief Executive Officer of Esso Properties Limited, one of Nigeria's leading integral real estate development and investment companies. With a strong background in financial management and training, he has been instrumental in shaping the real estate landscape in Nigeria.

About Esso Properties Limited: Esso Properties Limited is a revered name in Nigeria's dynamic real estate development and investment sector. Committed to innovation, reliability, and exceeding client expectations. Esso Properties has solidified its position as a leader in the real estate industry.

Join the Realtors Millionaire Summit (RMS): Elevate your real estate career by participating in the Realtors Millionaire Summit (RMS). This is an annual real estate conference designed to inspire, equip, and connect real estate professionals with the tools, strategies, and networks to achieve exceptional success in the industry. Click the link https://realtorsmillionairesummit.com/ to Register now and be part of this transformative experience.

[dkptx]

I Will Teach You To Be Wealthy

First: money is not wealth. Here's the difference. Money is numbers on paper. Wealth is systems that work: tools, relationships, and arrangements that are pleasing to the senses, and to the health. The word wealth comes from well, contrast ill. Wealth is wellnes: health of lifestyle.

What constitutes a healthy lifestyle? -mental freedom. The time and capacity to think things through. -absence of chronic fear, chronic stress. -confidence that you can overcome problems and difficulties -a direction to move in. If you're fighting an enemy, you need an attack surface. If you're trying to get somewhere, you need a roadmap. If you're fixing a machine, you need a schematic.

Most Americans are wealthy, but few feel wealthy. Others have named this "hedonic adaptation", but I think it runs far deeper than mere sensory pleasure. I think it is due to the way our society is at its core driven by envy. Advertising has been encouraging us to think this way for about one century, or three generations. We are a society of individuals whose mental freedom and independence has been eroding for THREE GENERATIONS. Think about that. It is shocking and dismaying. You may want to take the rest of the day off to grieve our fallen civilization.

Then realize the nation state is a zombie entity. Hollow state. You want to be wealthy, you must depend on yourself (and your social environment), not the state.

Alright. So you're wealthy but you don't feel wealthy. How do you learn to feel wealthy? It's simple.

Start recognizing tools and materials for what they are, rather than how good or expensive or glamorous they are compared to other people's.

Price is the mind killer. If you think the value of something is reflected by it's price, or something is good because it's price is high, recognize: "That idea was implanted in you by a salesman." It is simply not true.

There are plenty of immensely valuable things that have never been priced or sold, and many worthless things that have fetched a high price.

"A sucker is born every day" is a slogan known around the world as American. We have a deep current of hucksterism. That current of hucksterism is where the notion that high prices reflect real values come from.

Step one: notice wealth. Notice value. Notice systems that work. Notice materials that are good. Looks good, tastes good: is good.

Step two: see through the illusion of price. Money isn't real. Things are real. Titles (as in ownership documents) are real, but also possession is nine tenths of the law.

Step three: Stop comparing yourself to other people. We all live in a media environment that has been encouraging us to do this for 100 years. It is almost unfathomable how encumbered we are by envy and anxiety compared to our ancestors.

In order to be wealthy, you need a clear mental slate. This is simple, but hard. It doesn't happen overnight. But big improvements can be made in two years, and enormous improvements can be made in 20.

Cut modern media consumption. -replace it with older media consumption, if you have to. At least you will begin to see how previous advertising messages contrast with current ones, and begin to get out of the trap. -replacing it with meditative exercise, like walking, running, cycling, or boating is better. covering ground is very good for the brain. -replacing it with old books is better

Meditate.

Write. Write about what you like and dislike. Write about what you want. Write about what you hate. This gives you a roadmap to what a wealthy life would look like for you. What do you actually desire, and what do you genuinely want the power and freedom to get away from? Once you answer these questions, you have an idea.

OK, next step. Now we get into the details. Details are important. Wealth is systems that work well. Getting details right is what makes systems work well. This mentality is literally how you can create wealth all around you, anywhere you go, just by noticing and arranging things.

I said wealth, not money. Wealth is slow, money is fast. Moving this way in the world will eventually draw money to you, but it won't happen overnight. It happens over months and years and decades. Trust that it is worth it for it's own sake. The money is a mere consequence, and not something to get hung up on. This is a wealthy mentality.

You need to learn to think long term. Months, years, and decades. This is something that helps you see through the illusion of price.

As an aside: this is the reason that wealth cannot be taxed, only money can. Most wealth literally never shows up on paper. Wealth is systems that work. Most systems that are working are too small to have a paper title, and not fancy enough to have ever been appraised. You have begun to see just how tricky it is to recognize wealth in the first place. Notice that this is something the tax man cannot do. He can only think in the largest units, things that have titles. House, car, maybe some other big machines. He can never count all the wealth you have around you. That can never be taxed. And converting your money into real things is a way to get around taxes.

They can only ever tax what shows up on a spreadsheet. You want to make wealth that doesn't show up on a spreadsheet.

OK, another aside. This habit of noticing wealth and noticing potential arrangements all around you, and quietly putting things that way, it's a very vague skill. It's not exactly something you can put on a resume, and it won't get you a job. That's not how this works. What does happen is: it makes you a better guest and a better host. It's subtle. You begin to create a field of "Oh, things seem to go smoothly around this person." And that's the way you get access to wealthy people and gain entry into wealthy social spheres: because you contribute to them. Most of the ways you can contribute to them are very small and have nothing to do with money. The ones that do have to do with money are there for the people who need to buy their way in. That's not you.

Being a good guest and being a good host are the core skills of civilization.

[prism-digital]

Leveraging Brand and Creator Strategies for Business Success on TikTok

Did you know that, as of September 2024, TikTok has around 1 billion unique monthly visitors? While the majority of TikTok users are between the 10-29 age group, 38.5% are between 18 and 24, and the most staggering aspect is the platform has more Gen Z users than Instagram. As a social media platform, TikTok has been on fire lately, hasn’t it? In a short time, the app has gone from a fun social media hype to a powerhouse for businesses trying to connect with young engaged audiences. And if you are deploying a social media marketing strategy, TikTok is something you cannot miss. This is an app where brands are finding new audiences, and creators are reshaping what it means to be influential. How? .

Well, in this blog, we will show you how your business can team up with TikTok creators to reach new people, build loyalty, and get your message out there in a way that feels real and relatable. Read on to find out how we break down the different strategies that help brands succeed on TikTok. From choosing the right creators to running hashtag challenges and jumping on the trend wagon,

Why is TikTok a Goldmine for Brands Right Now?

Unlike conventional social media, TikTok isn’t just about perfectly clicked photos or refined and heavily edited videos with VFX. People come to TikTok for realness and creativity, for the quirky, funny, and raw side of things, or for the content that feels genuine. This relatable aspect makes the platform a great spot for brands that want to show a more authentic side with their social media strategy. Besides, TikTok’s algorithm levels the playing field by promoting videos based on engagement instead of the follower count, which means that even smaller brands can go viral with the right approach.

Partnering with Creators: The Marketing Masterstroke

On TikTok, creators are the key to improving your outreach with social media advertising. How? Well, because they have already built trust with their followers. So, when a creator promotes your product, it feels like a friend’s recommendation instead of an ad, and that’s quite powerful. However, the trick here is finding the right creator for your brand because not every creator is a good fit for your brand image, and the wrong partnership can actually backfire. So, how do you find the perfect match? .

Here is How You Do It!

Let us tell you one thing every social media agency in Dubai understands that selecting the right creator is like selecting a business partner. The creator you choose should match your brand’s vibe. For example, are they funny, informative, or artsy? Check out the creator’s content style, their audience demographics (who are their followers, and do they match your target audience?), and most importantly, the reach and engagement on their profile. Whether it’s Instagram marketing in Dubai or TikTok, you always need to understand that a small creator with a tight-knit, engaged community can be far more valuable than a big account with a lot of passive followers. The good news here is: once you find that creator who gets your brand, you are set up for a fantastic collaboration. And TikTok audiences are quick to spot partnerships that don’t feel genuine, so it’s worth taking the time to get this right. .

Get Creative with Hashtag Challenges

If you are looking for a way to get people talking about your brand, a hashtag challenge can be a brilliant idea. TikTok is all about participation, and a fun shareable challenge can spread like wildfire. Do you remember Chipotle’s #GuacDance challenge? People got a chance to win free guac just by showing off their dance moves, and it led to thousands of videos, which brought the brand positive publicity at a fraction of their social media management and advertising costs. Source: To make any hashtag challenge work, keep it fun and accessible. You should make it easy enough for everyone, but engaging so people feel excited to participate. In addition, offer a reward or shoutouts to charm people to join, and try kickstarting the campaign on TikTok by collaborating with creators who can rally their followers to jump in.

Using Creator Content as Social Proof

Let’s admit it: we all trust a good recommendation, especially when it’s from someone we feel connected to, and on TikTok, creators can provide that for your brand. Unlike Facebook marketing in Dubai, when a creator shares their genuine experience with your product on TikTok, it’s like a testimony but way cooler. On the platform, you can encourage creators to give their honest take on your product, and this will add a layer of authenticity and make people more likely to trust the review. While you are at it, don’t forget to repost this content across your other channels like Instagram or YouTube Shorts to get the most out of it. When you see the followers of those creators responding, don’t be shy about jumping in and joining the conversation. .

Use TikTok’s Advertising Options

TikTok has some powerful ad options that, when combined with organic content, can really boost your brand’s reach. Options like In-Feed Ads (which appear as people scroll), Branded Effects (custom filters or stickers), and TopView Ads (those ads you see when you first open the app) give you ways to reach people beyond your followers. The trick is making ads that feel like they belong on TikTok, if they are too polished, they can come across as just another ad. Use the same fun, creative approach here as you would with organic content. For example, show how people actually use your product or tell a quick story that shows off your brand’s personality.

Conclusion

TikTok is all about creativity and connection, which means brands have a unique opportunity to make a real impression. There’s no denying that creator marketing on TikTok can work like a charm for your brand, but if you want to do it right with a strategy that works effortlessly for your brand, ensure to partner with a professional digital marketing agency in Dubai. The professionals understand how TikTok works, and they can help you make TikTok your next big breakthrough even with a limited budget.