#genshin rambling

[cadriona]

Baizhu potential kit leaks below the cut alongside unhinged screaming/rambling because of potential cultural references and lore that may connect with some other characters and mora for a myth and-

so first things first- HOLY HECK BAIZHU HAS A HIGH CHANCE OF BEING A SHIELDER WITH SNAKE-RELATED ANIMATIONS IM AEOGIHAEOGIHA

So! Likely if you’ve been following me for any amount of time, you’d know that a while back id written mora for a myth (genshin fic where vision holders gradually turn into mythical creatures and whatnot) and one of the things i ended up malding over was figuring out who was what.

Long story short, keqing, ningguang and beidou all had creatures that i had felt corresponded to them quite well, and ngl, the correlation to the four cardinal directions was at first a bit of a happy coincidence, then more of a holy shit this might be a thing.

So! why the preamble? Well, in chinese mythology there are four guardian beasts/cardinal beasts/whatever tf you want to translate them as that correspond to the four directions. They are the white tiger, vermillion bird, azure dragon, and black turtle.

And as you can see, four characters from liyue pretty closely follow these motifs.

Keqing with the white tiger, Ningguang with the vermillion bird, Beidou with the azure dragon, and now Baizhu with the Black Tortoise.

But wait! you ask, wtf does a black Tortoise have to do with baizhu other than being tanky (which he is not, because he is a frail, frail man searching for immortality)? Well, I’m glad you asked, because the black turtle is also known by another name- the Xuanwu.

And Xuanwu isn’t just a tortoise, but a tortoise combined with a snake. Or rather, a single creature comprised of a snake wrapped around a tortoise, or a tortoise with a snake tail. Baizhu. And Changsheng. and not to mention the association of medicine with tortoises and etc in china!

So, four guardians of the cardinal directions, now represented by humans. Four humans in Liyue, a land no longer governed by their archon, and one that is stepping towards a future independent of the gods. Four humans, each of them crucial to Liyue in some manner and could also be regarded as guardians- Ningguang the law, Keqing the land, Baizhu for Liyue’s health, and Beidou as a roaming protector.

(Still can’t believe i predicted this in mora for a myth tho im fucking cackling because i had been joking when i said baizhu could’ve been a turtle but aeighaoeihgae well! chapter 8 for anyone curious, which was uploaded in. 2021 holy fuck.)

So yeah, thanks for coming to my unhinged rambling ted talk and I hope you have a pleasant day!

[tea-cat-arts]

Latest arcon quest got me thinking about this quote again

The gods of Teyvat are typically beings of the world (adepts, wind spirits, branch off the imaginary tree…) and don’t seem to condemn those who choose not to worship them. Infact, it seems like in most cases they actively ask to not be worshipped (Zhongli even praises Keqing for her open defiance against tradition) . The gods of Celestia on the other hand come from the stars and punish those who abandon them with a fate worse than death… and then there’s the “sinner” in chasm, who does not ask for worship but receives both it and blood… so what the hell is “he”

[divinepriestesskokomi]

We don't talk enough about how goddamn funny Tighnari is. That man is unphased by everything.

Cyno shows up at his doorstep with a small child who is traumatized, illiterate, terminally ill, and has an ancient god sealed away in her body, and asks him to help raise her, and Tighnari's only objection is that he doesn't know how to teach preschool level academics.

He eats a poisonous mushroom, passes out, and has a hallucination and just goes "damn that was crazy. Let me write it down for science."

The dudes in charge of the whole country repeatedly beg him to come work for them and he tells them to fuck off.

The second fatui harbinger, said to be as strong as a god, threatens him and he basically tells him to fuck off too.

The traveler gets possessed by god and then comes back to tell him that the sages are building a false god and he's like "Damn that's fucked up. Anyways I gotta go check on my patient."

Dehya and the Traveler basically say "Hey we are helping Cyno overthrow the government" and he's just like bet.

He get's struck by lightning and is just like "Oof. Anyways gotta go check on my patient, good luck fighting a god".

He finds an illegal sentient robot crab and just adopts it and tells the matra not to worry about it.

He passes out from heat exhaustion in the desert and is just like "Damn. I'll need to bring some sunscreen next time".

Finds out Cyno has a long lost brother/cousin and is just like "Cool. Why don't you come over for dinner, meet the family".

The craziest shit can happen to this man and he's just like "Allright why not. This might as well happen" and I love that about him

[suiana]

yandere! gamer boyfriends who are always gaming and leave you alone.

they have you questioning everything and anything about your relationship. was it all just a joke? is he cheating on you? why doesn't he show you affection?

and it's not that he doesn't want to, it's that he doesn't know how to.

he's spent his whole life gaming and huddled up in his little room that he forgot how relationships work. he feels so bad whenever he sees you moping around. so he does what he thinks is best.

"baby, what do you mean you don't like my gift?"

he thought you'd like his gift. i mean, you were complaining about this person for a whole now, he thought you'd want them gone...

a picture of them in his basement, all tied up while he poses cutely for the camera.

he thought that would be enough to please you, but it turns out he was wrong. you didn't like it at all. in fact, you called him a monster and even tried to break up with him!

"baby calm down, I'm just trying to make you happy."

he's pouting now, unsure of what to do. he doesn't know how to be sweet. he was never shown taught how to be loving and sweet. he doesn't know how to be a normal and sweet boyfriend.

"why don't you tell me what you want then? i just want to see you happy you know."

he really does. i mean, even if he doesn't show it, his heart and mind both belong to you. while he's gaming, you're all he can think about. actually, when he's doing anything for that matter, you're the only one on his mind. he can never think like how he used to before and it's all because of you.

"leave you alone? baby you're upset at me and I'm not leaving you alone. why can't we just talk things out?"

he refuses to let you leave his sight and out of his grasp. what if you go to some other person? he can't have that now, can he? also, don't people talk things out in a relationship? why are you trying to get away from him?

"you're mine. so don't ever think about leaving me."

a sweet kiss to your lips is all it takes for you to calm down.

huh, maybe he should kiss you more then.

inumaki toge, GOJO SATORU (but specifically if he was a loser nerd), kinich, kenma kozume, chishiya shuntaro, all of your favs

[kazumist]

getting hit by a snowball in the face by a complete stranger was not how you wanted to start your day.

“agh! oh my god, i’m so sorry. that was meant for my little brother, i swear!” the man—a ginger, you noted—said. you removed the residue of snow from your hair and sighed at him. “it’s fine; don’t worry. accidents happen.”

“are you sure you’re okay? i threw that snowball kind of hard…” he then says, moving closer. you stepped back, of course, cautious of him. he steps back as well, in surprise, realizing that what he’s doing might seem creepy to you. the ginger sheepishly rubs his golved hand on his neck, avoiding eye contact now. “it’s—i’m alright. thank you for the concern, though.”

“can i at least treat you for some hot cocoa? i know a place that serves the best you’ll ever taste.” he offers. you pondered about it for a moment, leaning more on the option of rejecting the offer. but before you could say anything, he already spoke first. “i insist—it’ll be quick, i promise! i just didn’t want you to leave it like this.” well, at least he knows he’s insistent. “fine, one hot cocoa it is then.”

“great! i’m ajax, by the way.”

— — — — — — — — 

“how did you and dad meet again?”

you froze with your child’s question. it was a funny tale, really. you looked outside of the kitchen window, reminiscing that day once again. “he threw a snowball at my face.” you chuckled as you continued cutting the apple in your hand.

“huh?! that must’ve hurt then!”

“well, it did, but look where that brought us now.”

note: happy birthday ajax ♡ no long fic for you this year but your birthday art immediately gave me this idea LOL but i feel kinda 50 50 with this one <//3

[jennifer-jeong]

Smut | AFAB!Reader Experience

SUMMARY How would your sweet boyfriend be in bed after they gain some experience from you?

CONTENT NSFW, 18+, smut, afab (assigned female at birth) reader, feminine reader implied (calls you “good girl”), fingering, penetration, creampie, praise, CHARACTERS ARE 18+

FUSHIGURO MEGUMI, OKKOTSU YUTA, Nanami Kento, Gojo Satoru, XIAO, KAEDEHARA KAZUHA, HAYAKAWA AKI

I headcanon that they’re initially pretty new to all this but they’ve always been tooth-rotting-ly sweet, praising you etc. However, as they get more experienced with you, they start to get a bit more vocal and rough… And you love it.

WORD COUNT: 905

You giggle as your boyfriend tosses you onto the bed, your head resting on the plush pillow. He positions himself between your legs and snakes his hands up your shirt. He slowly makes his way up your body until his face sits above your chest and his hands are squeezing the bottom of your mounds.

“So pretty… I never get tired of seeing them” he says as he pulls your shirt and bra up. You whimper as he attaches his mouth to your hardening bud. Your giggles turning into quiet moans as he plays with your sensitive tits. Your body starts to burn. The fine hairs on your skin rising as goosebumps cover you.

You pull at his hair as he pleasures you, knowing that he loves the stimulation and the dull stinging. He moans onto your chest as he thumbs your other nipple.

When he detaches, he quickly smashes his lips onto yours as he undoes his pants. You properly slip off your top and bra as he yanks his shirt off in a swift motion before taking his pants off.

You quickly return to moving your lips together, tongues quickly entering the dance as well. Your tongues rub clockwise circles together that have you both moaning.

He kisses down your neck and his hands latch onto your waistband. He pulls off your pants and panties together. His fingers quickly find your clit, giving it a few circles before dipping two fingers into your drooling cunt.

“Mmph! Feels s’good” you mewl.

“God you’re so wet, all for me?” He says as he kisses the inside of your thigh.

You whimper in reply and he starts massaging the spongey part in you, drawing deeper moans from you.

He never really says it but your moans are so heavenly to him. It turns him on beyond belief and he loves that it’s because he’s making you feel good.

He leans forward to give you some more kisses and you reach between your legs to palm him through his boxers. He groans at the stimulation he’s been waiting for. His tip already leaky from just hearing you moan. It leaves a small wet spot on the fabric.

“Want me inside sweetheart?” he asks, muffled against your skin as he presses kisses into your chest.

“Y-yes please… Nngh fill me up baby,” you sob with his fingers still pumping into you. Your response making him groan and his cock twitch.

He pulls them out and wipes your arousal onto his aching cock, his boxers long discarded. He grabs the back of your thigh with one hand as he positions himself to your entrance with the other.

His tip pops in easily and you both let out a groan. He fucks you a bit with just his tip. You mewl and throw your head back, feeling the beginning of his girthy length. As he eases in, you choke out high pitched whines due to how much he stretches you out. You feel so full when he eventually bottoms out. It feels so good it makes you both light headed.

“Fuckkk, missed being inside you baby… I could do this all fucking day.” He groans

“Mmmhh… wish we could. Y’make me feel s’full ngh-”

His veiny shaft gives you the delicious friction you’ve been craving as he gives you shallow thrusts to help you adjust to his size. He doesn’t wait very long though, you make him so needy after all.

He starts a quick pace, his hands pushing the backs of your thighs to your chest. He knows this position helps him massage your g-spot easily. He will occasionally fully push in, stay there, and grind his hips in a circular motion to give you some amazing stimulation. It makes your core burn with pleasure and always brings you closer to your high quickly.

“Feel good?” He asks through panting, his nails starting to dig into your skin.

“S’good baby… mmph!-“

The sound of skin slapping and the filthy wet noises you two were making quickly fills the room. It makes your face burn but also turns you on. Your boyfriend, however, is absolutely drunk off the sound and stimulation. It's just something about your breathy moans of his name and the slick sound of his cock pulling on your gummy walls that drives him crazy.

"Ah-! Getting c-close baby..." You whine out.

“Yeah? Mmph- Gonna cum? S-such a good girl.” He groans and you nod quickly while moaning in response.

“F-fuck, I’m gonna cum too,” his thrusts getting irregular as your jaw falls slack. Your tongue lolling out slightly, expression fucked out as you approach your high.

His thumb finds your clit and you tumble over the edge, tremors passing through your body as your orgasm washes over you. Your moans are uncontrollable as you babble out “thank you” to him for helping you ride your high.

Your slick walls clamping down impossibly hard on him making him come apart just as quick. His waves of pleasure hit him and he lets out a few high pitched sobs before groaning in a deep voice. He stills inside you as he cums, rocking in and out slowly as his whole body twitches. Thick ropes of cum fill you up and add to the stimulation during your orgasm.

You both catch your breaths, enjoying the afterglow.

“You’re getting a lot better at this hm?” You tease.

“Well I have a pretty good partner to teach me,” he smiles. “It’s also motivating to learn when it's a win-win situation.”

You giggle at his cute words, reaching up to caress his cheek. “God, I love you so much.”

“I love you too sweetheart,” he says wholeheartedly as he kisses you again before cleaning up.

|| MASTERLIST ♡ || Thank you for reading! ||

[battleonthebigbridge]

Sethos and Wanderer both having been the chosen with power of gods but are now both starting over in a more "normal" life in Sumeru city. Both of them being basically adopted into friend groups. Sethos being described as a puppy by Faruzan while Wanderer is represented by cats... The warm and cool color schemes in their designs... Sethos being an extrovert and good with people while Wanderer is introverted and avoids people whenever he can but Sethos keeps chasing him down... BUSY LITTLE BEE... WANDERER SMILING AT SETHOS... I need to pace back and forth for a while.

[rimechaser]

Scaramouche strikes me as the kind of guy who would call homophobes pathetic and really attack them on a personal level, but he'd also be trying to reclaim all the slurs.

[n0tamused]

Your dragon lover who comes home to you after a long time spent apart and goes to immediately hug you from behind, his arms locking you in his loving embrace and you can feel his heartbeat against your back. He is nosing at the crook of your neck, breathing in your scent that lingers with the smell of spices and herbs from the meal you're preparing. He loves you so much, and he tells you so. Not only through words but the way he holds you as if you're the sole provider of oxygen. The way his teeth lightly nip at your supple skin, leaving behind little faint marks of his love, all over your shoulders and on your nape. He is pawing at your hips, begging you to just come to the couch, to bed, hold him or let him hold you, just allow him the time to be close to you. Allow him the time to show the parts of his love that his words fail to describe. And when you give in you find yourself below him, his head on your chest listening to the drumming of your heart that he couldn't directly kiss. Your fingers are combined through his hair, creating separations in his locks before messing it up gently once more and starting over. His low, quiet sounds of pleasure tell you all you need to know about how he's enjoying this, low and soft grumbles urging you to keep going. Any more of this and he'll start purring on your chest like an oversized cat, but neither of you would mind. Not when he's holding you like his most precious treasure, wrapped around you like a rope, and not when you hold him so tenderly.

Characters: Zhongli, Neuvillette, Jiyan, Mortefi + any of your faves as dragons

Ⓒ n0tamused. Do not repost, translate, edit, and/or copy any of my works. Likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated.

[turtlespancake]

i love seeing out of context posts about long-running stories with deep lore because it's always shit like "MAJOR SPOILER WARNING!! i can't believe that the metallic athenaeum's envoy actually used never-ending dance of the 57th universe on rionne as if she's not LITERALLY the incarnate of august?!?!" it's like buddy boy thank you for the spoiler tag but all of those words are incomprehensible without at least 5 years of foreshadowed knowledge, 7 different fan theories, and 21 wiki entries

[avnasace]

where is the tsaritsa finding these harbingers goddamn bc so far we have:

a royal mage from khaenriah

capitano (no spoilers but those who played 5.1 you know what i mean)

evil very intelligent doctor who experiments with god remains and dabbles in educational crimes, (DO NOT let him near children)

columbina.

a cursed child from a thought-extinct khaenriahn bloodline with shadow fire blood ish magic who runs an orphanage

a politician

the inazuman puppet made by a traumatised god who got discarded by said god, who went on to join the fatui out of spite and grief, almost brought inazuma to its knees, stole a gnosis, made himself a god, then erased himself from history and went to uni

lady and her svarog who we know nothing about except that she created katherine which could be either very wholesome or very sinister

mondstadtian crimson witch of flames 'im the only one around here who gets shit done' la signora (R.I.P)

a banker

local guy in his mid twenties who fell in a hole as a child, went briefly to hell, came back feral and probably traumatised, has a heart of gold but also an 'i want to fight god at every opportunity' complex. was ready to sink a nation bc the hot god said so, and bro can also turn into an 8ft strangely hot abyssal creature and fought an intergalactic all powerful world devouring whale for like 40 days straight.

[dragon-ascent]

I think Zhongli enjoys holding you with his dragon tail a lot.

Makes it easier to snuggle up in bed, making sure you’re always beside him - and when you’re not, he can simply reach out and pull you over with that tail of his (much to your bewilderment).

Or he’d just wrap it around you when he feels a burst of affection for you, gently squeezing. Especially when he’s doing an unrelated task but still wants to show you some love.

Conversely, Zhongli might wrap his tail around you when you’re the busy one, not-so-subtly trying to get you to take a break and relax with him instead. What he might not say in words, his tail will express instead.

It’s also great for pinning you down whilst he makes sweet love to you, getting all the best angles.

[galdrgobrrr]

I find it endlessly fascinating how much Alhaitham outside of his character stories is portrayed as someone solely defined by the present. He never mentions his family ever. You don’t even know he’s an orphan unless you read them, or even that his grandma was such a pivotal figure in his life (and inspired some of his current views). He’s so divorced from his past you could be convinced he just popped into existence one day with no fuss.

[mistywaves98]

Smutty Nerd Scara headcanons bc he's been plaguing my mind

Nerd! Scara who tolerates your bullying only because he thinks it's cute that you try to piss him off.

Nerd! Scara who eventually has enough of you pushing him around and finally pins you against the lockers one day when you try to shove him against them.

Nerd! Scara who smirks as he sees how your cocky exterior crumbles to reveal the weak little thing hidden beneath.

Nerd! Scara who fucks you shamelessly against the wall of the nearest bathroom.

Nerd! Scara who whispers degrading words into your ear, ten times worse than any pathetic insult you've ever thrown at him.

Nerd! Scara who adores making you choke on his fingers to shut you up so that you both aren't caught.

Nerd! Scara who reduces you to nothing but a blabbering mess, completely fucked out and unable to think of anything but his cock rearranging your guts.

Nerd! Scara who you now follow around like some obedient dog, eager to do whatever it takes to please him just so that he can fuck you again.

Nerd! Scara who makes you cockwarm him while he studies, not allowing you to move an inch as he holds your hip with a bruising grip.

Nerd! Scara who tutors you when your grades drop but it's too hard to pay attention when he's practically rubbing your clit through your clothes. The study sessions always end with him pounding you into the mattress of the very bed you were suppose to be doing work on.

Nerd! Scara who doesn't mind when you're bratty at times, taking this as opportunities to bend you over his knee and spank your ass raw till you're crying out apologies for being so rude.

Nerd! Scara who— ok okay I'll stop now, I can literally go on and on about this

[jennifer-jeong]

Smut | AFAB!Reader Cinematography

SUMMARY Men who’d take videos of your cum covered body or face to save for later.

CONTENT NSFW, 18+, smut, assigned female at birth (AFAB) reader, implied feminine reader (he calls you a "good girl" etc.), exhibitionism if you squint, praise, filming sex, making porn basically, vaginal penetration, implied blowjob/face fucking, alludes to cunnilingus, cum on body, swallowing cum, facial, ALL CHARACTERS ARE 18+

WORD COUNT: 627

Ones you probably expected FUSHIGURO TOJI, RYOMEN SUKUNA, GOJO SATORU, CHILDE, KAEYA, UZUI TENGEN, MIGUEL O’HARA, MARIUS VON HAGEN

Ones that you might not have expected but they do it possessively KAMO CHOSO, NANAMI KENTO, FUSHIGURO MEGUMI, ALHAITHAM, HEIZOU

There’s something about filming fucking you from behind with the flash on that turns him on like crazy. The way your ass bounces and the plush flesh recoils makes him lightheaded. The sounds that fill the room turn you both on, making you extra sensitive. The light slapping of skin, the wet “plap” noises, the sound of his veiny cock dragging on your slick walls, hitting the deep bundle of nerves in you with every thrust. There’s a visible ring of cream around the base of his cock and there’s a clear shine because the flash reflects off how wet you are and how much you’ve coated his dick. You can’t explain why, but it has you reaching your high faster than you expected.

Maybe it’s the way that he eggs you on more, saying things like “behave for the camera, darling,” or when he talks to the phone like “look at you, taking it so well… Such a good fucking girl.” Maybe you secretly liked being filmed, even though you knew no one would ever see it but you and him. Maybe you liked the nasty idea of being watched, even if only by your boyfriend when he opens the video in the future to pleasure himself to.

You don’t dwell on the thoughts for long though, your impending orgasm pulling you out of your pondering. You give him a short and strained sob of a warning before you clamp down on him. You moan into the pillow you shoved your face into to contain your uncontrollable voice. Waves of pleasure crash through your body as you visibly shake for the camera. The scene in front of him plus the tightening of your pussy around him has his eyes rolling back and has him cumming in a few strokes. He shoots his load all over your ass and back, a few ropes of cum reaching your upper back. He kneads your ass as he enjoys his afterglow and ends the recording after properly capturing your cum covered body. But he’ll still stay there, cooing praises and telling you how well you did. He’ll sit there, admiring his work. Seeing his cum drip down your ass is such a filthy and sinful view, he just can’t help how satisfied it makes him feel.

Other times he’ll have your pretty self on your knees, filming you with your tongue out, doe eyes looking up at him as he pumps his cock with his hand. You’ve just sucked the soul out of him, deepthroating him and letting him face fuck you. He’s already so close and you’re basically asking him to paint your face with how you’re looking at him. The whole situation makes your needy cunt clench around nothing. He knows that you deserve a reward and he’ll either fuck it into you or eat you out to give it to you after this. So, he finishes quickly so he can take care of you fast. He groans out to let you know he’s about to cum. He aims for your mouth but towards the end, he covers your face with his release. It forces you to close an eye shut to avoid any unwanted inconvenience.

He records the whole thing using the room’s ambient lighting instead of flash, the flash sometimes doesn’t capture your cute face properly since the camera is a bit far away, so he chooses this. For him, the whole point of filming is to capture your lovely expressions, especially when, after he finishes, you swallow and open your mouth to show him you didn’t waste a drop. He praises you a bit before ending the recording and giving you the reward you deserve for being his pretty and good girl.

|| MASTERLIST ♡ || Thank you for reading! ||

[suiana]

your boyfriend has been acting weird lately (various yandere characters x gn reader) (ANGSTOBER DAY 2)

"babe are you-"

"can you quit talking? seriously, you're so damn annoying."

"...i only wanted to ask whether you were hungry..."

you stare at your boyfriend, lips pursed as he continues to type away on his phone. he's been like this for three weeks now. getting mad at you for no reason, cursing at you... did you do something wrong?

all you ever wanted was to be a good significant other and he's acting like he's on his period or something! jesus, can't he be a little bit more mature too?! picking fights with you for no reason, making a big fuss over nothing... and not even telling you why?!

...

you know what?

you had it with him.

"hey, what's your problem huh?! why are you so edgy nowadays huh? did i do something wrong?!"

your once loving boyfriend stares at you, eyes and mouth wide at your sudden outburst. he takes a moment to compose himself, eyebrows furrowing the second he thinks things through.

"god you're so damn stupid. I've been repeatedly telling you, haven't i? i hate you. what can't you understand?! this is why I'm always getting mad, damnit!"

you scoff at him, arms folded in front of your chest as you try to keep your cool... only for your anger to get the better of you, resulting in a screaming festival between you and your boyfriend.

"hate me? you can't expect me to believe that. not when you were literally obsessed with me up till three weeks ago?!"

"i-"

"you used to threaten people just for looking at me! you even tried to kill someone because they asked for my number! and now you want me to believe that you hate me? stop with your bullshit."

".. actually-"

"oh. are you seeing someone else? is that what this is? you're trying to make me break up with you, is that it?"

"n-... you know what? yeah, yeah it is. i want to break up with you. I've found someone else that i love more than you."

your boyfriend states, eyes dead as he stares straight at you. he breathes calmly, as if he weren't affected by this at all. meanwhile, your heart felt as though it had shattered into many tiny pieces. tears fell from your eyes, unable to be held back any longer as you broke down, falling to your knees as the male just stares at you stoicly.

"let's never see each other again."

he mumbles, turning on his heel, swiftly leaving you alone to wallow in your sadness in the once lively apartment. shit... you hadn't expected things to end like this.

"he's a fucking jerk..."

you think through your tears, vision blurry as you clutch your chest. you really loved him and he just?? left?? how could he be so heartless?

if he didn't love you he could've just said something about it. he didn't have to be so mean and hurt your feelings before finally bringing up another person! god damnit, why did you have to fall for such a person?!

you cried, wailing as you cursed your now ex-boyfriend.

"fuck! i hate you! i hate you so much! i hope i never see you again! just disappear from my life! you just left me to die here! stupid ex-boyfriend! i hate giving you my love!"

what you didn't know however, was that your 'heartless' boyfriend had stood outside your door, frowning at your every word, regretting everything he had done up until that moment. because he had loved you too. truly.

he loved you so damn much that he wanted to tear out his hair every single time he was mean to you. he wanted to tell you that he didn't mean any single one of those hurtful words. he wanted to cry and beg for your forgiveness every single time he did anything hurtful to you.

but it was for your own good. it was to keep you safe. and if he needed to hurt you to keep you safe, he'd do it. because he loved you too much to see someone else hurt you.

and being with him meant that there was always a risk of you getting hurt. so how could he allow that to happen when it could be prevented? how could he let his selfish feelings get in the way when you were such a precious little thing? sure, he loves you and he'll do anything in his power to ensure your safety but what if he can't protect you one day?

what if one day you just... get used against him? he's a dangerous man and has a lot of enemies. surely they'll find out that you're his weakness. of course he has gotten rid of anyone who might harm you now but who's to say that there won't be more in the future?

which is why he has to severe all ties with you now. he can't risk it. because he may be strong, but he may not be strong enough for whoever may come in the future. that's why he's been doing what he's been doing-making you hate him so that it hurts less when he decides that it's time to leave. he assumes that it's working wonderfully, after all you've never once noticed his puffy eyes in the morning.

"at least... they'll be safe now."

and disappear he will, for he has too many regrets welling up in the depths of his soul from what he did to you. he'll make sure to never come across you again, instead lurking in your shadow, observing you from afar.

a star like you need not be dirtied by his presence anymore.

dazai osamu, akutagawa ryunosuke, megumi fushiguro, blade, scaramouche/wanderer, your faves<3