#genetic apostate ; ffvii

[phoenixfiiire]

@dragonliiight asked: [ MELTDOWN ]  for sender to witness receiver being hurt which causes them to go into a murderous rage. | BLOOD MEMES | ACCEPTING

He had been played and he had only realized it when it was far too late to do anything about it. Believing, trusting ShinRa was a mistake. They never were to be trusted, never could be trusted, he should have known-

They didn't want to find Dion to help him. They wanted to use him. Hurt him. If he wasn't going to work for them - then he was going to be killed.

And it was all Joshua's fault.

They had found him; he had fled from Midgar, made his way through the caves to Junon, and if he had been able to make it there and across the sea then maybe he would have been able to really vanish. Joshua should have let him. But he missed him in a way that made his heart ache and he didn't understand it, he didn't understand why thinking about Bahamut made him feel so lonely, didn't get why he felt like he needed to cry when he remembered how long it had been since Dion had fled.

They had him surrounded in one of the forests by Junon. Dion was still in hiding, but he wouldn't be able to hide forever; ShinRa had thrown enough grunts here to ensure there was no vanishing this time. He had to fix this.

His lungs burned. His chest ached. Joshua ran, hoping - praying - that he found Dion first.

"Dion-!"

He was there, Joshua could see him - and he could see the red dots of laser sights locking onto him. They knew what they were dealing with. Whatever bullets were going to be used, they would be meant to take down the materia-infused experiments.

They fired - and he gave one final push, hands slamming against Dion's chest as the burning in Joshua's chest exploded into sparks of pain. The bullets ripped through his back and out through his chest in an explosive spray of blood.

For a moment he stood, staring down at Dion's face. There was blood there - was it really his own? Joshua swayed, legs buckled, knees slamming into the dirt.

"Run-" One of them at least needed to stay free.

[phoenixfiiire]

[phoenixfiiire]

@cloudyfenrir

"Do you feel well enough to maybe go for a walk today?" He wasn't trying to be pushy, but sometimes he couldn't help but feel antsy being stuck inside the run-down hut they had managed to claim.

Besides, maybe some fresh air would do Cloud some good? Well... as fresh as it could get down in the slums.

[phoenixfiiire]

@axnewxera from [x]

The two of them were not what anyone could consider close. At best, employer and employee - though Joshua wasn't deluded enough to think even that could be true. After all, was he really even that? A lab-grown experiment with more than a few uses that made him valuable enough to keep around even after the experiments had been declared mostly failed, and the scientists had been... reprimanded.

It was just a fancy way to say most of them were killed. Hojo hadn't been, but there was likely little Hojo could do that would be truly deemed as too far.

Joshua wasn't foolish enough to think that Rufus viewed him all that differently. He was still just another tool to be used, another piece of ShinRa equipment to be put to use. The only real difference was that Rufus was at least willing to pretend he was a person, while Hojo made it clear that he was anything but one.

"A drink would be fine." And he smiled, though it didn't fully meet his eyes. There was little that could soften the blue glow, the tell-tale sign of mako infusion - but again, was that not why he was here?

Not that he really thought Rufus needed protection. But there was little that could even try to get close to him as long as the Phoenix was here.

"Though you shouldn't bother with anything fancy for me. Wouldn't want me getting used to that treatment now," he added on, tone just slightly teasing.

[phoenixfiiire]

Cloud struggled to do as asked, but he did manage to do it. Joshua waited a moment before lowering his hand and nodding, noting as he did the extreme reluctance that he displayed when it came to making anything that might have resembled eye contact. His gaze stayed firmly downward, only lifting up high enough to be able to make out what Joshua had been gesturing.

He also noted the way that Cloud mimicked him, but didn't say anything about that. It could have just been a quirk, it could have been something more, but in this moment it mostly didn't matter.

"Alright, that's good. You're able to tell that..." Though, now that the test was done, Joshua was left to puzzle over just what good the information did for him. Had he really been concerned over the thought that Cloud might have been seeing double? And what would he have even been able to do if he was?

It was just something that he had seen before, probably in some movie ShinRa had been gracious enough to allow him to watch one night. It had settled into his mind as just what you did to check up on someone, and he hadn't really questioned the simple thought of -- why?

"... how are you feeling? Oh, those men-- they tried take your sword, but I stopped them." And he gestured toward the blade that was resting against the wall, not too far from where Cloud was resting. "I don't know if they took off with anything else though. I wasn't able to chase them down."

Cloud slowly nods, completely missing the compliment of his name and sits back in slight relief that he did make it to Midgar. If he hadn't a part of him felt like he'd be letting someone down... Maybe it was himself or was it someone else.

Before the blond could spiral too far into his thoughts, Joshua had closed the distance between them with a simple question.

"How many fingers am I holding up?"

There was a slight confused furrow of his brow before he realized that the other was holding up their hand. There seemed to be a slight struggle to get his eyes to focus, his vision blurred around the edges with a sickening green pulse. Silently Cloud mimicked the gesture, almost unaware that he was doing it before he answered.

"Two... You're holding up two..." He speaks, the first part an unsure whisper and the second more confirming his answer. Everything Cloud did had some kind of battle, like he didn't trust himself. Still he looks to where he assumed Joshua's face would be, though not looking him in the eyes, with a questioning look to find out if he was correct.

[phoenixfiiire]

@sacredflorist

He heard the commotion before he heard the tell-tale click of the electronic lock, informing him that the door to his room was now open and that he could leave.

Which was... strange.

A lot of things happening today were strange. For one, he wasn't supposed to be in his room. He was supposed to be in the labs, completing the tests for the day, but he had been rather quickly and hurriedly rushed back to his room before any of them could be completed. It was strange, and he had tried not to think much of it - but deviations in his daily schedule never happened.

Or, when they did happen, it was because something bad was happening. Like when Dion had...

Leaving was... not allowed. Even though the door was open and the lock was broken, Joshua knew the expectation would be that he continued to sit here and wait until someone came by to tell him what was going on. But...

The lights flickered for a moment as Joshua padded over to the doorway. Hesitation still gripped him tightly until they went out, leaving him in the dark for a moment until he conjured a small bobbing orb of flame to illuminate him.

"Hello?" The sound of the commotion, shouting and yelling and was the gunfire? could still be heard. It was going against what would be considered common sense to head toward the source of the noise, but after hesitating for a moment Joshua started off.

[phoenixfiiire]

@warofthebeasts from [x]

His eyes snapped open and he jerked upright fully when he felt the cup being slowly taken from his hands. There was no real sense of comradery that had ever been fostered amongst the experiments, which meant it was just as likely for one of them to be trying to steal him meal straight from his hands. It had happened once before and, when Joshua tried to make any sort of complaint, he had just been told he should have stopped the other if he cared about eating.

With the realization that it was Sephiroth, Joshua paused as he waited for his brain to try to catch up. The other had spoken and it felt like it came across as a muffled warble before it all seemed to shift in his mind, clicking into place as actual words.

It was an offer for him to be able to sleep.

It took another moment for him to process what had been said.

"... what about you?" A blink and a slight frown. "Don't you need to... rest?"

[phoenixfiiire]

@hautevaux from [x]

It had been under the President's orders that Joshua be fitted for something that looked more appropriate that the clothing he wore before; the attire of a labrat was rather consistently something that resembled pajamas and nothing more. It wasn't like he ever had any reason to be given a proper wardrobe when he was never being seen by anyone outside of the scientists working on him, something that was no longer the case. He had to look presentable if he was going to be serving as one of the President's bodyguards.

And so he had been handed a card with instructions written on it that Joshua himself could not even begin to understand (the fact that he still struggled to read didn't help) with clear directions: Give this to the man who ran the Haute Couture Boutique. He'll know what to do with it.

(He was supposed to blend in with the Turks - which meant suits, well fitted, but comfortable enough to maneuver in combat situations.)

"I'm not sure." The admission was truthful,, but Joshua found himself feeling slightly ashamed for it. He had heard about how nice things were above the plates, but getting to actually experience it firsthand himself left him feeling... like anyone who looked at him would be able to tell that there was something wrong deep inside. People like him didn't belong in nice, fancy places like this.

"It's for my-- employer?" Joshua stumbled on the last word, unsure of how to describe his relationship with Rufus. "He, uh, he gave you instructions, I think."

[phoenixfiiire]

His head cants to the side for a moment before he grins. In a smooth motion he reaches out to snag hold of her hand, tugging her along with him.

"Sure-- but we have to find one first."

"You   know   what?"       mischief   glints   in   those   golden   brown    eyes   of   hers.        ".....give   it   a   try    ....           try   going   on   that   date....    I'll   tell   you   if   you're   doing   it   wrong"

[phoenixfiiire]

@lastflowerpetal from [x]

He knew she carried flowers around with her. It had been why the idea of offering her one had even first come to mind, though now that Joshua really thought about it he could see there were more than a few flaws in his plan. The thought of trying to muscle into her 'territory' had never even crossed his mind; it hadn't quite clicked until now that she didn't carry them just because she liked them. They were for her to sell.

Most of the people below the plates of Midgar seemed... dim. It was the only word that Joshua had found that came even close to properly describing what glancing at them felt like, and even then it didn't quite seem like enough. Not dim as it dumb or dull; they were plenty smart, probably even moreso than himself if he was being honest. But... just dim. Faded. Washed out. Their color and essence and being drained out drip by drip until they were just identical grey blurs.

It happened to people above the plates too, especially to those who worked with ShinRa. Their colors lasted just a little longer and they didn't turn grey so much as horribly washed out, but it happened to everyone.

Hojo said it was a side-effect of the Phoenix. That he could see into people. Joshua wasn't sure if he really understood it, but he knew the monotonous colors got to him sometimes. It made something in his head feel almost like it was itchy, and there was hardly a good way to reach inside and scratch it.

The girl with the flowers had never seemed dull or dim or gray.

"No, I wasn't planning on doing anything like that." She seemed disinterested in talking. It was likely a good sign for him to take a hint and leave, but he wasn't the best with social cues - and he was curious about her.

"You sell flowers? Here I was thinking you just carried them around for.... fun."

[phoenixfiiire]

The figure of Sephiroth before him lunged, sword aimed to pierce at the Phoenix's heart, and seconds before the steel could impale his chest the man--

Burst into flames.

He howled as his skin bubbled and crackled. Viscera oozed down his cheeks before being charred black and disappearing behind another curtain of flames that swallowed him whole. Even his shrieks of pain were dwarfed by the howls of the fire.

And just as quickly as it had blossomed, the flames vanished. The only remnant left behind was a pile of ash and a scorch mark on the ground.

Joshua stared at it for a long moment, his chest heaving from exhaustion. As the world around him flickered, the strange liminal space of the battlefield replaced by the stark white walls of the ShinRa labs, he felt his legs start to shake before his knees gave out. There should have been paid when he went crashing to the floor and his knees connected heavily with solid ground, but he felt nothing.

For a moment, at least.

The urge to vomit hit him before the wave of nausea did. It came on fast, strong, and Joshua clapped a hand over his mouth in a vain attempt to try to stop himself - which only resulting in his stomach's contents spewing out from between his fingers, splattering the front of his shirt and pants as well as the ground. His chest heaved again as his lungs spasmed, and he was forced onto all fours as more bile was ejected from his stomach.

It was tinged red and black and was far too thick for just bile. There were also chunks that Joshua was certain had to be flesh, more than likely his own that had necrotized from the materia.

Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes as his stomach convulsed again, and again, and again. The horrible mixture of bloody vomit leaked from his nose, and part of him was certain that was even what his tears were made out of him.

It felt like ages before his body finally quieted down, left without any strength to continue expelling the rotting pieces that had grown inside. It was in that quiet that another sound finally registered; slow, steady clapping.

He tilted his head up to see Hojo standing several feet away from him, applauding the performance. "Congratulations. You managed to defeat the Sephiroth programming."

Something that might have almost been pride? curled up inside of him.

"A program that had been recorded almost three months ago now, and that he had long since surpassed."

"... Ah."

If he had energy, Joshua would have felt ashamed and sick to his stomach - though the latter was already well taken care of. All of that effort. All of that suffering. And for something pointless. Useless.

There was a soft tut from Hojo, a noise that was clearly mocking, only Joshua couldn't hear it for what it truly was. "Cheer up. There's still Genesis and Angeal. They could maybe make use of this. Or some of the other SOLDIERS. Oh, I'm sure we'll find this useful for another... week or so?"

A week. That was all the time his suffering had earned him. Maybe longer, but Joshua knew better than to hope for that. But still, a week-- a week without having to suffer under the experimental surgeries from Hojo, without having to force his body to fight even when he could feel himself beginning to break down.

A towel was dropped on the floor a few paces from Joshua. "Clean this up. You can shower after." Nothing else was said before Hojo left, leaving Joshua to reach out to snag the cloth with shaky hands. There was a bucket, a sink and hose, and a drainage hole on the other side of the room, which meant he had to force himself to stand on shaky legs and walk over, filling the bucket up, carry it back, try to wipe up as much of his own gore as it could-

-try not to vomit again so he didn't have more to clean up-

The process took him close to an hour. His own clothing, a simple red shirt and black pants, were tossed into one of the hazardous material recycling bins in his room. No doubt they would just be incinerated before a new pair was given to him. It didn't matter much; he had plenty of identical pairs.

At least the hot water never runs out. It was the only thing he could really think of as Joshua crawled - almost literally - into the small shower in his room. It wasn't really meant for people to do anything other than stand in it, but he curled his legs up to his chest to allow him to sit as he let the hot water just pelt him, washing away the dirt and vomit and blood. More than likely he'd fall asleep here.

A week. Maybe he could plant more flowers. Or go into Midgar. A whole week. Practically a lifetime, really...

[phoenixfiiire]

Genetic Apostate ; FFVII

This verse is not really... super fleshed out, but the basics are that Joshua was another test subject of Hojo who was deemed a failure. The Phoenix materia was fused with his body. The results had him becoming incredibly frail and sickly, all while being able to use powerful fire and healing spells.

Going off of the timeline that Sera has put forth, Joshua is 16 in the events of Wutai/Nibelheim (i think Wutai was the same year?), and 23 during the events of the main 6.

He was 13 when Test Subject 001: Bahamut escaped. Being the second-most successful summon experiment, the procedures on Joshua were increased afterward.

---

something something placeholder for the time hojo told joshua they were putting him into another VR simulation before dropping him in wutai and he did kill civilians thinking that it was just part of the simulation and 'test' and didn't think twice about it until someone (a turk? low level SOLDIER) told him he was an idiot for thinking it was just a simulation and now joshua lives with a vague constant fear that he will never be able to tell what's real and what's fake around him.

---

Joshua is far more naive in his ffvii verse as he truly cannot recall memories before being an experiment. It's unclear if his mother abandoned him or if she offered him up due to how sickly he was as an infant. It's likely he would have died without the Phoenix materia become infused in his body.

Because of how he was essentially raised in the lab, there is some level of fondness for him from Hojo, but think of it like... the way you'd fondly view a family pet. Or a relative's pet you saw twice a year. It's not real affection.

Joshua does 'escape' the labs to explore Midgar. Hojo and the Turks know he does this. He's monitored the entire time. Joshua truly is unaware of this.

He does not have a friendly relationship with the Turks. It's not like he hates them; they just don't talk to him. He's not worth their time.

When using the powers of the materia, Joshua's body can grow flaming wings and his body starts becoming crystallized with fire. Beginning around the age of 12 he became used as a battle simulation for SOLDIER. Whenever his simulation was defeated, Hojo would work on trying to retune him to increase his strength in battle. This took an immense toll on him, resulting in Joshua becoming weak and sickly and deemed mostly a failure. The only thing he's good for is the creation of battle simulations and Hojo will keep pushing for stronger bursts until Joshua dies.

He grows flowers in the lab. His magic helps.

---

The Phoenix materia is, at its core, the essence of life itself. It is fire, it is death, it is rebirth, it is the act of living and the ability to perceive life.

Hojo's experiments had left Joshua with the strange ability to be able to really see people. In his own words, he can see them as they are or dimmed; ie: looking gray, blurry, or washed out.

People with a strong will of Life, people like Aerith, show in their full colors for him.

Drabble regarding the simulation battles

[phoenixfiiire]

Joshua knew he didn't look like much at a glance (and truthfully, he would have privately agreed that that type of assessment really was accurate). He was thin - scrawny, really. Pale skin, messy red hair. His clothing weren't of any sort of ShinRa uniform, being dark pants and a red shirt, but the ShinRa logo was stamped firmly on his upper sleeve. Part of him was actually surprised they hadn't gone so far as to actually brand him with the same logo, though maybe they had and he just hadn't found it yet.

His posture was slouched, making him look a bit shorter than he really was, and one arm was looped around his chest to awkwardly rub at his other arm, completing the awkward, shuffling appearance.

"I'm..." There was always a moment of hesitation in moments like this. Every time he was asked, it became harder and harder to remember what he was supposed to say in answer. He was... Joshua. Joshua Rosfield. He was-

"I'm the Phoenix."

The arm that had been looped around his chest unwound itself as he straightened. It was clear he was unhappy about being here, but he had little choice in the matter. "You've all gone far enough. I have to take you back and... they'd prefer it if you were all still alive."

@phoenixfiiire

The climb up Corel mountain had been exhausting enough without them also having to deal with the latest guy ShinRa sent after them. Cloud had been sure It'd be another Turk when a man approached them at the destroyed Corel Mako Reactor, but it wasn't. There was nothing about this person that

Whoever this was, he was an obstacle standing in the way. Cloud moved to the front of the group, brandishing his sword.

"Who are you?" He demanded to know.

[phoenixfiiire]

Never let him watch a horror movie he will not sleep for a week after.

[phoenixfiiire]

@obscureign mentioned you on a post “A subtle, delightful incline draws across one's...”:

@phoenixfiiire "Ah, yes... that's music to my ears. However, your exploits remain just mere tales to me, *Fire Son*."

​Oh, yes. It always came back to this.

Sigh.

"Is there someone you want me to kill for you?" Tone even, calm, and just ever-so-slightly bored. "As a demonstration of proof, of course."

[phoenixfiiire]

Someone introduced Joshua to ShinRa's version of TikTok.

"-- so... Mister President is a Zaddy?"