#gabi answers things

[somewillwin]

Here’s a thought: Wolfwren Olympics AU with fencing team Shin and shooting team Sabine

Sabine’s team showing up to the fencing event to cheer on their country, and then Sabine spies Shin competing for the opposing country…

Ehehehehe

[taohs]

top 5 theories where u ended up being right but we had to either heart eye u or distract u with women (this is ur chance for vindication go off queen)

lovely suggestion in fact I’ll give each of you a mention 🥰

(orv spoilers ahead)

tell me, you fool: @bixiaoshi still crying bc what do you meannn it was from author’s pov 😭

49/51: @hansooyung maybe you have a point…. it does sound better than 50/50

@squidokja and @yoojunghyuks trying to convince me that secretive plotter was gong pildu and bald . Like hello where did that come from

I can’t remember the exact theories but you having triple back up plans for everything I say or immediately posting fanart of women LOL

apparently francesca also took part in it somewhere along the journey, idk which part exactly but i feel like she deserves a mention anyway hi ily @tls123 😔 <3

[vexic929]

Serum injection + Mind Games + Superpower Overload for the bingo board

(I assume this is like... you keep a running board and check off boxes as you write them until you get a bingo? I might be doing this wrong idk)

serum injection from Bad Things Happen Bingo info on Ricki and Gabi here and here

The serum burned on its way through Gabi's veins and she writhed on the table, trying to free herself from the straps that held her down. Her eyes itched and her vision shifted rapidly, the lights too bright as her pupils widened to a tiger's. Everything was suddenly painfully loud as she felt her ears shift; her skin itched and almost seemed to bubble as her body tried to transform against her will, cycling through multiple animals in rapid succession. She felt like she might be sick as her internal organs shifted again and again. What the hell was happening?

Somewhere, outside the chaos in her body, she registered the sounds of distant fighting echoing from the hallway to her left, but she couldn't focus on it for long, trying desperately to keep her body from shifting out of her control. Or maybe...maybe she could redirect it. Shift into something useful. Something small or...an octopus or something. Anything. Just not this.

The person who'd injected her was suddenly launched into the air out of her line of sight, followed by a very pissed-off looking Raven, presumably holding them up with his telekinetic powers if the way he was holding his hands was any indication. Rapid footsteps, and then Ricki was there too, tugging the straps loose with a concerned look.

"Gabi, hey, look at me. Are you hurt? What's going on?" Her voice was firm and soothing and she reached out but hesitated.

Probably scared touching her would hurt, Gabi thought hazily, she was probably right, too. Everything hurt.

"Raven, let him down. We need to get Gabi out of here." Ricki instructed, glancing back at the teen. He dropped his hands and Gabi heard a distant thud as the man crashed to the floor. She hoped it hurt.

Ricki reached for her again and Gabi growled at her, feeling her hackles raise. Moments later, she came back to her senses, color flooding her cheeks with embarrassment. Why the fuck had she growled at Ricki? She let out a shaky breath, trying to steady herself and Ricki's expression softened.

"Easy. We're going to get you out of here and figure out what they did to you. Will you let me help you?" Ricki spoke slowly and clearly, like she was talking to a scared animal. Well, Gabi supposed, she kind of was at the moment.

Gabi nodded and Ricki carefully helped her up. Her knees buckled and Raven immediately reached out to help steady her. Before she knew what she was doing, Gabi had dropped into an animalistic crouch and slashed at him with claws she hadn't realized she'd grown. He managed to dodge and backed off, hands raised defensively. Gabi blacked out.

When she came to, she was lying on a couch with a thick blanket over her. Her body felt sore and unfamiliar and she sat up slowly, taking in the dimly lit room. Ricki was sitting in a nearby chair, leaning forward with her elbows resting on her knees, chin resting on her fingers. She looked tired.

"Oh my god, please tell me I didn't kill anyone." Gabi blurted and Ricki shook her head with a small smile.

"No, everyone's fine. How do you feel?" She asked, studying Gabi closely.

"Shitty." Gabi admitted, wincing as her body throbbed in protest.

Ricki hummed. "I'll bet. You went on a bit of a rampage. Luckily that place was coming down anyway and nobody got in your way." She explained, then paused. "Do you remember anything?"

Gabi thought for a moment, then shook her head. "I don't know...everything's kind of hazy."

Ricki smiled but it looked a bit tight, stressed. "That's okay. Get some rest." She stood up and stretched and Gabi laid back down, pulling the blanket up over her shoulders. She still felt jittery, like she was ready to shift again at any moment, but with Ricki there, she felt safe.

[karizard-ao3]

What would be your idea of a Christmas hallmark eremika story?

Full disclosure, I think I have watched one single Hallmark Christmas movie in my life, in which Christina Milian went into a snow globe because she loved Christmas so much, and then I don't remember if she ended up with the snow globe guy or if there was another fella for her to end up with. Everything I know about Hallmark Christmas movies is basically hearsay, but wouldn't Mikasa be a high powered executive reluctantly going back home to her small town where a Christmas tree farmer named Eren steals her heart and makes her believe in Santa Claus again?

Okay, let me think about this. Um. Mikasa is engaged to Colt. Or maybe widowed by Colt? They had been raising his much younger brother, Falco (they're orphans), and now it's just him and Mikasa, because Colt has perished. This will be their first Christmas without him and it's tough. Falco is acting out at school. Mikasa wants to try to make it special for him even though she HATES Christmas (because Colt died at Christmas?! Maybe???), so she brings him to the mountains.

There she meets Eren, Christmas tree lumberjack and single Dad to Gabi. Eren and Gabi are sledding while Mikasa is out for a walk and they knock her over? She and Eren get in a fight about who should have been watching where they were going! Mikasa vows to never talk to that frustrating, rude, handsome man ever again, but then Falco and Gabi take a shine to each other- stop. I'm going to have Eren be her uncle so she and Falco can fall in love, too and no one will complain because they're not going to become step siblings. Her parents sent her to spend Christmas with Eren because she's making them crazy at home. Anyway, as the kids spend more time together, Eren and Mikasa spend more time together and she finds that he's not so bad. Her Christmas gift is discovering she can love again. RIP Colt.

I'm not sure what the climactic incident would be, but perhaps some kind of sledding related emergency? I don't know! I'm not a Christmas person, so this is not coming naturally to me. If I have any better/additional ideas, I'll let y'all know! Enjoy some festive emojis to make up for my failings.☃️❄️🌲⭐🎁🎄🎅🔔🤶🦌🥛🛷

[maiteo]

im convinced more and more every game that you were right about arteta and this spanish propaganda he’s pushing by keeping raya in the xi…somethings gotta give

corrupção!

[crepegosette]

about your Man of Uncle art, shouldn't Nyo Prussia be Gabi? since she's East German

read the tags :>

[burnmywholelifedown]

Hi bestie I'm here I'm queer I'm going to ask you what's your favorite book (or if I've already asked this, what's your ultimate dating deal-breaker or maybe just relationship deal-breaker in general doesn't have to be romantic). Also, Killian is my second favorite character because Emma is my absolute favorite character on that entire show. Their relationship was EVERYTHING to me, I love sunshine v darkness trope so much, hence sterek and destiel as well. I love teen wolf but idk how much of that is because I was like 13 when I started watching it tbh. I would watch it just for dylan's performance in season 3 because HOLY SHIT he should have won a fucking Oscar.

asldjkflsdkjf oh my gosh are we meant to be best friends?? Ugh yes Emma is absolutely fantastic I just personally relate to Killian just that smidge more I think. They are both so special to me 😍 Ugh yes that trope is the best. Everlark was another couple that had that dynamic for me. Man now you're making me wonder if watching it for Dylan would be worth it. My only concern is that it might be too YA for me (I get very turned off by highschool stories). That's why I haven't picked it up yet. I'm afraid I missed the boat on that show. Now I tend to enjoy my YA stories to be fantasy because then the characters are more likely to be less immature (and potentially traumatized by the stakes of the fantasy world which is also fun - looking at you TFOTA trilogy and Grishaverse books).

Whoooo boy okay a favorite book is really hard because books mean a lot to me. I think you know that about me by now so you're getting a list from the last couple years lol:

TFOTA trilogy - the politics was so fun and the twists and turns kept me engaged. I read all 3 books in 48 hours and have reread them multiple times since in the last couple years because they were so good.

The Hunger Games trilogy - that series is straight up literature. There is so much to unpack.

In Other Lands by Sarah Rees Brennan - idk what to say about this book except that the characters are so loveable, the take on portal fantasy is unique and the way she flipped sexism on it's head was so thoughtprovoking.

A Taste of Gold and Iron by Alexandra Rowland - excellent anxiety rep, top tier slow burn without a lot of drama or miscommunications, beautifully written fantasy world with no homophobia

Captive Prince trilogy by CS Pacat - um this is a more problematic pick but if you're down for a high fantasy slow burn true hate to love romance this is where it's at man. You will have such a good time you won't even know what you signed up for until you are embroiled in the middle of it. Gosh Laurent's character arc gives me life.

Anything in Alexis Hall's Spires Series + Boyfriend Material - what this man has to say about gender and queer identity changed my mindset about what it is to be queer and I love it so much. His books made me feel so seen especially Pansies, For Real, and Boyfriend Material.

What Is a Girl Worth? by Rachael Denhollander - The only nonfiction book on this list lol. I loved how eloquently she spoke about her story and how she included the problems she's seen in the church around sexual assault. We need someone who has the legal and Christian connections to advocate for survivors but she's doing it and that really inspires me.

If I have to pick just one though - I pick Boyfriend Material and here's why (x). It's really personal to my insecurities and it made me feel very seen and loved. It's the epitome of a comfort book for me. Whenever I need a pick me up I go to that book and listening to Joe Jameson's voice gives me hope that I too will be loved in this precious way.  Honestly this is why the Spires books and Boyfriend Material are so special to me: These are stories about people who think they are broken and the men that show them that they've never been broken actually. They get to hear "I love you however you are. But also who you are is a person who can do things so you don't have to stagnate like this." It was so healing to read about I cannot even tell you.

If you're looking to check Boyfriend Material out you need the audiobook I promise you!! I will hook you up bestie just let me know 😉

Oh also my main platonic or romantic deal breaker is a combination of apathy and lack of thinking deeply about things (the reverse is also true - I find people who are passionate and think deeply about art and life super attractive. Those are the people I keep in my life).

thank you for these questions I clearly loved them lol. now i want to know all of these things about you! what are your favorite books? what do you find most attractive/unattractive in a person?

[warwicked]

Tags

[somedeepmystery]

I will return to gallya reading just for you for sure!

You are beautiful for this!

Here is hoping I will manage to get something for you to come back for! lol

[somewillwin]

The Wolfwren in my head they are dating. and shin behaves like the girl in the photo-

https://www.tumblr.com/l1995l/731399828022722560?source=share

Jsjsjsjjd I love it!

Happy belated wolfwren Wednesday

[yougavemeyourheartyouknow]

SMUT!!! Minors dni!! Dry humping, slight groping, somnophilia, ‘just the tip’ trope (it’s not gonna be just the tip🤭), unprotected PinV (wrap it before you tap it), breeding kink, slight use of daddy/mommy, cream-pie. Cursing. I don’t write smut very often so apologizes if it’s not very good. Happy valentines day🤭🫶🏼

—

Thinking about Baby daddy!Miguel O’Hara who insisted that you take the bed in his room after you suggested to sleep in Gabi’s room, swearing you wouldn’t fall off her twin bed despite both of you knowing you move way too much in your sleep to stay on that thing comfortably all night.

Baby daddy!Miguel who wouldn’t take no for an answer, resulting in you setting up shop in his room. Leaving the room right before you were about to sleep to get a glass of water, only to see your 6’9 ex trying to squeeze himself into his couch with a blanket and pillow. You weren’t sure if you wanted to laugh at the sight or not but you sure as hell felt the ache in your chest while you watched him twist and turn in an attempt to not fall off while also trying to find a comfortable position. With a begrudging sigh, you told him, “come on, get in here.” while nodding towards his room.

Baby daddy!Miguel that slept on the right side of bed, while you on the left. Both with your backs facing away from each other, but you both forgot how much you both move in your sleep, and despite not having slept in the same bed in 9 years, your bodies have somehow gotten themselves into a spooning position sometime in the middle of the night as you both slept.

Baby daddy!Miguel who had only been with a handful of women since your break up, and with his new refound love for you, couldn’t help himself but start to get hard in his sleep. The feeling of your ass pressing against his cock only made it worse.

Baby daddy!Miguel who let out quiet whimpers and groans when he slowly started to rut his hips into yours. Now half awake and mind hazy, and he knows he should stop but the silent whine that fell from your lips and the way your hips roll back so your ass meets his groin again keeps him going.

Baby daddy!Miguel who had to bite down on his lower lip to keep himself from groaning too loud so you don’t wake up as he dry humps you like he did after a frat party 10 years ago. Dipping his head and planting soft wet kisses on the back of your neck as his hands slowly drag themselves up and down your body, your hips, your ass, your tits, wherever they can grab.

Baby daddy!Miguel who almost creams his pants when he hears you sleepily call his name in that breathy and high-pitched voice you always got when you’re hot and bothered. Feeling like he was dreaming when he asked if you wanted him to stop and you said no.

Baby daddy!Miguel who couldn’t stand not being inside of you any longer, but he didn’t have any condoms since he hasn’t been seeing anyone recently. So with the most whiney desperate tone you’ve ever heard this man speak in your whole 12 years of knowing him, he asked, “let me put in just the tip please?” And who were you to refuse?

—

“Porfa amor, just the tip I promise.” You never thought you’d find yourself humping up against Miguel like a bunch of horny teens again, yet here you were, in his bed with his hard-on pointing at your backside, you’ve never been more thankful then at that moment your daughter had to participate in the soccer teams sleepovers then you did now. (Please baby,)

You couldn’t take it much longer either, never feeling so overheated in a tank top and a pair of his boxers that fit you like oversized shorts. Why did you both have to sleep half naked? You quickly nodded your head, glancing over your shoulder to get a peak at Miguel as you panted out, “okay, okay just the ti-“ but you didn’t even get to finish the full sentence before Miguel flipped you both so you were on your back as he hovered over you, one hand supporting his weight while the other grabbed the boxers and your panties to tug them off of you. Your hips rising to help assist him, kicking them to the side as he takes off the pair of boxers he was wearing before his hand came down to pump his cock a few times, lining it up to your cunt as his lips met yours to swallow your whines.

“Fuck, I’ve missed this pretty pussy…” He groans as he finally sinks the head into you, his lips dipping into the croak of your neck as you let out a small hiss. Despite it only being the first two or so inches you couldn’t help whimper at the stretch he provided, you’ve truly forgotten how big he was. “Shh, shh, I know mami, no one takes care of you like I do…” He cooed, his hand running through your hair as he leaves sloppy kisses on your neck, and whether you knew it or not he was right, both in bed and in general. “Let daddy take care of you…”

“Mig-fuck-“ You moaned as your eyes fluttered shut, your hips bucking up to get some more of him in you. He must have read your mind, pulling out fully before sinking himself into your heat again, a bit deeper this time. “So good-Miguel.”

“Yo se, mami, yo se… he didn’t fuck you like I do huh?” He asked between pants, each thrust filling you more and more. You were too busy moaning to answer, so you opted to nod instead . “Fuck your so pretty like this cariño… might have to fuck another baby in you.” (I know, I know…) (sweetie)

“Fuck Miguel-I’m gonna-“ With one final thrust, he finally bottoms out, making the knot in your lower stomach come undone. Wave after wave pulsing through you as you squirm underneath him, his orgasm soon follows. Pumping his seed deep inside your used cunt, his thrusts grow sloppy as he helps ride you both through your orgasms.

When he finally pulls out you couldn’t help but let out a small whimper at the sudden loss of him, only left with the feeling of him dripping out from between your legs. You barely got time to catch your breath before his hand went to your hips and turned you over so you were on all fours.

“You thought we were done? No way sweetie. I finally got you back, we’re going all night.”

Thank god you were on birth control.

—

Part 5.5<

Part 6.5<

Not proofread.

Word count: 1.1k (girl idk how that happened either)

Taglist: @famouscattle @strawberryjuice9 @loser-alert @maomaimao @franceseca-the-1st @ginnysculture @mishaglass @wusyanmee @mangoslushcrush @queerponcho @bunnibitez @miguelzslvtz @migueloharastruelove @dahehow @sinners-98-world @othersideoftheparadise @toyfortoji @yeshajane @yvesbi @hanjisgf @deljojeisbackagain @safixiovi @emmalandry @maxinemus3 @lauraolar14 @aaaaslaaaan @kenz-ee @esmedelacroix @whattheshock @migueloharasoulmate @syler-griffin @comeonatmebruh @xwonderlandresidentx @m4dyy @mcmiracles @the-pan-liquid @lilbrababe99 @jxstanemo @badbitchhour @freehentai @sillysillygoofygoose @nj452896 @jadeloverxd @faretheeoscar @miguelsfavwife @ce3stvu @scorpihoooe @blossomofbismuths @tomalymme @nxxav3rs3 @ilovespiderverseeee @ghost-lantern @saaaaaaaaaaaamiiiiiiiiiiiira @lavenderslemonade @rinnako @reirain @nommingonfood @miguelsfavwife @tomalymme @farrowroyale @beckberin-xo

[quaintii]

Across the Street

Pt.3

Pt.1, Pt2.

synopsis: Miguel calls you in once more for babysitting. He has a day off from work and something inconvenient happens.

content: 18+ MDNI - babysitting, DILF miguel, fingering, m!receiving bj, praise and degrading, dirty talk, spiccyy overall.

A/N: thank you guys for the support!! Love u all 💞

extra: art is on Twitter by kimmy_arts0912

Miguel woke up to the sound of his phone burring on the bedstand, clicking the stop button.

9:04 a.m.

He slowly rose off the bed, rubbing his temples and heading to the bathroom. He took his time getting himself ready, it was never easy for him since he would regularly work for long hours but today was a day off.

He took a shower, shaving off his stubble beard with a mirror glued on the bathroom wall. He got out with a towel wrapped around his waist and a small one on his wet hair.

Soon as he finished changing, he went downstairs to drink some black coffee and eat some peppered eggs with bacon.

As he scrolled through his work emails on his laptop, he saw Gabriella at the corner of his eye. She stepped off the stairs, approaching Miguel and hugging his legs.

"Como dormiste, mi changa?" (How'd you sleep, my girl?) He let out a hearty laugh, ruffling her messy brown curls. His focus was now on Gabriella, carrying her with one arm while his other hand pinched her swollen cheeks.

"Bien, papi!" She said as she swinged on his arm. Miguel smiled and lifted her back on the floor, reaching for the chair for his daughter. He placed two plates, a small stack of pancakes with strawberries, butter and syrup while the other was a bowl of fruit.

"Make sure to eat all of it, mija. It's bad to let things go to waste." He spoke as he washed the prior dishes from last night, making him vividly relive the memory of his fingers in you. He couldn't shake the thought of you, he kept spacing out on your touch.

He snapped back to reality when he peered his eyes to his phone ringing, his wife. Well almost his ex-wife, the divorce was still in date for court but they went their separate ways months ago.

He wrapped a towel around his hands, drying them and answered the phone. "Hello?"

"I'm picking up Gabriella later today around 6."

Miguel's brows furrowed together. "What do you mean?!? This whole week is my time to spend with her. I have a day off today and tomorrow." He snapped back at her.

"What's the reason for the sudden change?! Im allowed to spend time with my daughter too." He was fired up but whispered into the phone so Gabriella wouldn't hear.

"She just got home a couple days ago, que te pasa en la mente?!" Miguel spoke. She scoffed into the phone. "You're more in love with your work than our own daughter."

"Well I planned a trip for the both of us and I already have everything packed for her. Relax, you'll get her back in a couple days, bye!" As Miguel was about to yell at her, she hung up on the phone.

"Pinche pendeja.." he muttered softly on his lips.

He was furious but had to remain calm to not raise Gabriella's suspicion of why her dad was breathing so heavily and palming his face with his hands.

After a couple minutes pass, he sat next to Gabi watching a cartoon show to ease himself down. He would then urge Gabi to go brush her teeth and change into something else rather than her unicorn pajamas.

Miguel decided to take Gabi to a new toy shop that just opened. He was still pissed about the call earlier but the thought ended up leaving his mind as his focus was now on his daughter's happiness.

5:04 p.m.

It'd been a day or two since what happened. Miguel hadn't sent you a message to babysit Gabi, until this afternoon.

"Hey, can you come over to babysit Gabriella? That is if you're not busy with anything."

"I'll be on my way in 5 minutes, Mr. O'Hara."

"Perfect..thank you. Again, Miguel is fine."

You felt so queasy about stepping in foot back to his house but so excited. You wore a summer dress due to the heat emitting from the sky. The afternoon would always be the hottest time of the day where you lived.

You face the mirror to fix the messy curls that sprung up due to the frizz. You apply some lip liner, finishing it off with a red tint gloss.

5:12 p.m.

You knock on the door, patiently waiting. You hear a click and the door finally opens, the sun shined on his caramelized skin. He look almost jaw dropping.. with a slicked back hair look. Loose black fit pants with a loose button up shirt. His eyes gave off a smile smile and invited you in.

You looked around to find Gabriella drawing at the table.

"Hi Gabi!" You squeal and wave at her as she rushes into a hug towards you. "Yay! You're back!" She was eager to see you. "What are you drawing? That looks great!" "I'm drawing a forest with fairies and unicorns!" Her high pitched voice rang in your ears.

You lean in closer to look at her drawing, acknowledging it. You give her a sweet smile, she returns it back.

You step back and walk to the cabinets to get a glass of juice. Your body jumped when you felt a hand rubbing in circles on your ass.

Miguel grazed his hands on your shoulder, whispering near your ear and dragging you further to the kitchen. Gabi's back facing the both of you two, you felt his hot breath fan you; shivers down your spine and to your core.

"How have you been, muñeca? Te ves muy...hermosa." He husked in a low tone. Your breathing slowed down, worried to even peep a sound. "I missed you..was worried you wouldn't come back." His rough hands rub the soft skin on your hips.

His tongue teased your neck, sucking and softly nibbling on it. "N-not here Miguel..your daughter.." You whispered, trying hard to restrain your small whimpers. He hummed in your ears, nibbling on it before detaching himself as soon as he heard a doorbell ring.

Luckily the kitchen had the blinds closed so whoever was outside, couldn't see.

He sighed and you quickly headed to open the door, facing a woman. She had on black sunglasses to block the sun in her eyes.

"You must be the new babysitter right?" She questioned as she placed her purse on the island countertop. "Yes! I was recently hired by Mr. O'Hara, Ms.." You waited for a response from her. "Mrs. O'Hara." She spoke, she reached to grab Gabriella by the waist; a suitcase near the table.

You had thought that he was divorced, you thought pretty quickly to it maybe they just haven't had gone to court yet to fix their situation.

"Mom? Where are we going?" Gabriella prods her head at Miguel and you. "We're going to Disneyland!!" She squeals as she hears the exciting news.

Miguel sighed and rolled his eyes, knowing that she never really gave attention to Gabriella, just spoiling and bribing her.

Gabriella was brought down back to her feet, hugging you and her dad by the leg, waving goodbyes.

You helped her out with packing some of her toys upstairs. When you both finished packing up some extra stuff, you head downstairs, slightly peering your head to see Miguel and his wife whisper about stuff. Miguel's chest heaved as his hands ran through his hair, frustrated.

Gabriella prods her head at what you're looking at and you quickly distract her by asking her something.

"Did you grab all of your toys, Gabi?" "I think so," she said as she rubbed her head and headed towards the door.

The lady drank some champagne from the glass, eyeing you up and down, questionable about you. You were never this nervous, but you worried if she had known.

She averted her gaze back to Gabi, holding her hand and the suitcase near Miguel. "Bye papi!" Gabi squeaked as the door behind her closed. Miguel waved non-stop til he couldn't see her anymore.

He laid his elbows on the countertop, tilting his head sideways back and forth. "Everything okay?" You walked up to him.

"Yeah.. um..it's just.." He hesitated to tell you. "Oh, don't worry! It's fine you don't have to tell me, Mr.-.. Miguel." He sighed angrily, "No no, it's just that..this week I was supposed to have Gabriella. She comes unannounced, not even a heads up that she would take Gabi with her."

As he vented more of his frustration, he felt relief by letting it all out. You were open eares with him, softly patting his shoulder blades to ease him.

"Wow..that's really messed up. Do you have custody of Gabriella, if you don't mind me asking." You spoke softly.

"Yeah, I do. We haven't had the court fully decide yet, it's coming up in a couple weeks. I just hate how she's nowhere fit for her to be actually caring for Gabriella." He sighed and took a big sip from the champagne bottle.

You hummed in return, heading to the snack closet for something to ease him up. "Want some snacks?" You asked. Miguel gets up and walks towards you.

You tip-toed to reach a cardboard box full of gummies, until you felt your body shivering to the touch of his hands around your waist later reaching your bra.

He wraps his arms around you, his touch becoming a bit more daring this time.

"You're very tempting. It's difficult to resist you right now..."

Miguel smiles at you and whispers his words. He then places his lips on yours again, his kiss passionate and eager. He wraps you as tight as he can, his hands roaming your hips.

"Oh, I would love something sweet. Don't you?" He murmured on your neck. His hands pushed your dress up, caressing your plush skin. "Mr. O'Hara-.."

You felt a sharp slap to your ass. "What did I say? Llámame Miguel.." (Call me Miguel)

He placed a hand on your chin to face him, kissing you softly. The second kiss seemed more like hunger.

"Get on your knees for me, cariño." He husked in a low tone, you obediently listen and laid your knees on the cold marble floor. He caressed your face once more, "Good girl.." The praises that came out his mouth made your cheeks heat up, your blood pumping to your pooling cunt.

Miguel's face lights up with pleasure, his eyes staring at you seductively as you kneel down in front of him. He watches your movement as you kneel, breathing slightly heavier. The way you look at Miguel also makes him feel good.

"Mm..."

Miguel's hand then reaches down and he grabs your head, making you look up at him.

"Open your mouth..."

Miguel moves his hand down to one of your shoulders, moving his thumb along your collarbone and then along your cleavage.

"Open wider, muñeca..."

Miguel's smile grows more and more as he sees you opening your mouth. You see his hand moving around your lips, just touching your face sensually here and there. Miguel's eyes never leave yours, and you find his stare to be both attractive and also exciting.

"Mm... Good.."

Miguel's eyes move down to your tongue and then back up to your face. He starts to whisper in your ear, his voice going slightly deeper.

"¿Como se siente esa boca, chiquilla?"

Miguel's breath slows, clearly aroused. He stuck in two fingers into your mouth and you hollowed your cheeks softly as you sucked on them for a bit. He went deeper, making you gag continuously, he took his fingers out licking them clean.

Your eyes landed on his bulge, palming it with your hands, rubbing it harder each time, pulling groans out of Miguel.

You begin to remove his pants by unzipping it and pulling down his boxers, his hard cock slapping his abdomen. The red brownish head was practically fuming for your touch.

You part your lips, laying your tongue out and licking the pre-cum streaming down on his tip. You try fitting all of his cock in your throat but you can't so you stroke the rest of him.

His eyes drop down to your face, his eyebrows furrowed together, savouring the delicious feeling of your tongue around his cock. You bobbed your head faster when your throat relaxed, being able to take in more of him. You clench your inner thighs together to feel some relief on your swollen clit.

His breathing becomes shallow the more he becomes impatient. When you looked up at him with small teary eyed..

He loses it.

He needs and wants to feel more of you, he slammed his cock deeper down your throat. The squelching sounds and low groans of his voice made you whine but it was muttered by his cock in your mouth.

You dig your nails into his thighs to keep yourself steady, you feel like you've ran out of oxygen. But you couldn't care less.

"Puta madre..." He whispers.

The feeling of him driving you absolutely mad, his grip on your scalp tightening with every thrust he took. The aggression shocked you, but you couldn't move since he took complete control of your mouth.

His cock pressed harder into your throat, making you gag on and on while tears streamed down your face. Your flushed out face drew him to his final straw.

His hips snapping against your cheeks, the slapping sounds echoing. The feeling of your fingernails digging deep into his skin, your muffled moans clenching harder around his cock whenever you hollowed your cheeks, made him lose his control.

"F-fuck...you're so good...such a pretty little slut aren't you? So fucking good f'me baby..." He scowled.

You kept muffling mhm's as he would praise your touch on him. His hips began stuttering, his thrusts slowly becoming slower as his cock became more and more sensitive with every warm touch of your tongue around him.

He held both sides of your face in a firm but gentle grip, abusing your throat to catch his orgasm. "I'm c-coming..mhmmf..mierda..." He whined.

His massive body shook with his imploding orgasm, he shoved his cock to the back of your throat and shuddered as his cum was hot and sticky on your tongue.

The moment he pulled out, he angled my face to his, towering over my frame. "Swallow it f'me." He spoke bluntly.

Miguel removed your mouth off his cock, his erection still hard and pulsing. All he wanted right now was to be inside you but he had different plans for you. He was going to return the favor back to you now.

You let out a few coughs to catch your breath and swallowed just like he asked. Bittersweet taste left on your tongue.

"Eres tan buena y hermosa, ma." (You're so good and beautiful, ma)

"Llevantate, amor." He panted on your neck.

He grabbed you by the shoulders and lifted you up, resting your quivering ankles on his broad shoulders. His fingers stroking and prodding at the wet stain on your underwear, his cold touch setting you on fire.

"Let me touch your pretty pussy, amor. Déjame ver ese bello coño.." (Let me see that pretty pussy) He tore your underwear off, the cold air washing your cunt makes you shiver. He lightly slapped your folds to see your face contort and furrow.

Suddenly, his hot tongue flicked your wet folds, and heat swirled in your stomach, your clit throbbing. Your skin burned to his touch as he reached for your perked nipples, rubbing it with his hands and whenever he would pinch your nipples, you would jerk forward; making his nose hit your clit.

"M-more Miguel.." You begged, your cunt clenching around nothing left you feeling empty and so needy. Your fingers wrapping around his brown curls, gripping onto them dearly as his tongue lapped on your clit.

"You're doing such a good job f'me, mi amor. Keep moaning my name like that. Fuck.." He groaned into your cunt. He slid into another finger and the feeling was too much for you to handle.

"M-miguel.." Your pants filled with wanton and lust. Your body jerks forward as he slid a finger inside you, your eyes impossibly rolling back to the back of your head as you choked on your moans, mumbling his name as he continued to eat you out like a starved man.

"Mirame, corazon. Keep your eyes on me, yeah?"

You felt too much and too little all at once, it wasn't enough for you but you felt like you were about to get thrown off the edge as his fingers started pounding you deep inside your velvet walls. You kept twitching and trembling, your back arching off the wall as your body hopelessly writhed for him.

Your nerves began stuttering, going numb along with a knot starting to untie. Miguel wouldn't stop sucking on your folds, his nose nudging your clit. His eyes never left your face, he loved seeing how you responded to his touch.

You started feeling a fire pooling low in your abdomen, your heartbeat pulsing faster than before.

You started losing composure whatsoever, when he slid in another finger inside. He didn't stop lapping on your sopping cunt, your pussy clenching around his fingers made his cock ache for your walls to tighten around him.

"It's t-too much.. m-miguel please mhmgf..fuck!" You sobbed and wailed. Your tears wouldn't stop, his fingers plunging in deeper inside your swollen cunt.

"You can handle it, doll.. I know you can." His ears relished the wet squelching sounds and your sweet little moans. You tugged harder into his hair as you felt a wave crashing down, the dam broke which released a leg-shaking orgasm. Fire sprinted throughout your body, the feeling of it taking over your mind with nothing but his fingers and tongue on your cunt.

Your orgasm came in flooding in and electrified every nerve in your body. Your vision fading to black. Your throat welled with moans and mewls, as you kept blubbering incoherently.

Miguel devoured you without mercy, savoring your juices as it ran down his chin. He kept you steady by holding you tight on your hips as you wiggled non-stop, shaking and writhed under him.

You loved drowning in helplessness of the pleasure as it surrounded you by the waist, leaving you breathless, shaky, and light headed.

You became almost feverishly whimpering since Miguel would still suck on your clit, tenderly. He finally removed himself from your folds, smirking at you while caressing your flushed out face. "Te ves bella así, muñeca. Eres mia..que no?" (You look beautiful like that, doll. You're mine, right?) You nodded as your orgasm finally came to a stop. He rested your ankles back to the floor, holding you up by the waist so you wouldn't succumb to the floor.

Just when he was about to tease you with his cock slowly on your folds, you both hear a ding from the door. Keys ring through your ears and the door creaked open. Heels clacking on the hard floor echoing around the spacious house, heading upstairs. The both of you quickly start to dress up quickly, you knew exactly who this was.

"Miguel!! ¿¿Dónde estás?? Do you know where the monster high dolls are?!?" A woman voice yelled upstairs. Miguel gave you a quick peck on the lips and a wink.

"What is it this time?" Miguel's voice responded back to her. "Gabi forgot her stupid toys..anyways just tell me where they are. She won't stop crying and I need her to shut up."

Miguel refused to give into his emotions and snap back at her so he gave off a small response to her.

"They're in the hidden basket under her bed, the lock is in the bedstand drawer." He answered, looking back at you tip toeing to the door.

You sent yourself off by going back home quietly and hurriedly.

Miguel was once again incredibly frustrated for the intrusion.

A/N: it's 12:31 am rn, gonna have the best sleep ever. I finally finished it! Leave any feedback, always room for improvement, thank you guys!! (Sorry for the ending once more 😭😓, I promise to make part 4 hella dirty and long)

Taglist: @thedevax @missussmorales @mxtokko @roronoaslover @livytofine @lolaiitip @luvstuffies @sweetirilly @avatricu @minnbinn @rqdior @migueloharasgirlfriend @t-sillay @brittney69 @honeycovered-bandaids @whatdudtheysay @tuskjohnny @spideys2cute @mushy-mushroom04 @yuki9912 @yumeeesss @noyasanify @ewan-tef @ilonasthing @lia-77 @migueloharaluhver @notsussybaka @woahnotmecryingoverafanfiction @usagijoestar @itzsab @gh0stcatss @ihateuguys @nyoxklo @xstormstriderx @bontensbabygirl @jroshtssn @realalpacorn @toecurlingstories @lunamoonbby @amberpanda99 @minihorizons @kathleenisdaraptor

[16woodsequ]

100 Asexual Books Rec List

For this list the goal is fiction books with a main character or significant secondary character that is on the Asexual spectrum, or non-fiction books about being Aspec.

Junior Novels

1. Rick by Alex Gino An eleven year old boy starting middle school begins discovering his asexuality admist the school's rainbow spectrum club. Also features transgender and crossdressing side characters, as well as a LGBTQIAP+ supporting cast.

2. Sal & Gabi Break the Universe by Carlos Alberto Pablo Hernandez In order to heal after his mother's death, Sal learned how to meditate. But no one expected him to be able to take it further and 'relax' things into existence. Turns out he can reach into time and space to retrieve things from other universes. Asexual Sal.

3. Hazel's Theory of Evolution by Lisa Jenn Bigelow Hazel knows a lot about the world. But even Hazel doesn't have answers for the questions awaiting her as she enters eighth grade. What if no one at her new school gets her, and she doesn't make any friends? What's going to happen to one of her moms, who's pregnant again after having two miscarriages? Why does everything have to change when life was already perfectly fine? Hazel (main character) is asexual and aromantic (it isn't said in the book, but it is specified in the author's note at the back of the book).

4. The Trouble with Robots by Michelle Mohrweis Evelyn strives for excellence. Allie couldn't care less. Together, these polar opposites must work together if they have any hope of saving their school's robotics program. Allie is asexual and/or aromantic. Junior graphic novel.

5. This is Our Rainbow by Editors Katherine Locke and Nicole Melleby Featuring contributions from Eric Bell, Katherine Locke and A.J. Sass, this first LGBTQA+ anthology for middle-grade readers presents stories of queer fantasy, historical and contemporary stories for every letter of the acronym.

6. Every Bird a Prince by Jenn Reese After she saves the life of a bird prince and becomes their champion, seventh grader Eren Evers must defend a forest kingdom, save her mom, and keep the friendships she holds dear--if she is brave enough to embrace her inner truths. Eren is aromantic (and I'm guessing asexual, though that isn't discussed).

YA Fiction

7. When Villains Rise by Rebecca Schaeffer With her best friend, Kovit's, life in danger, Nita is determined to take down the black market once and for all. Latina asexual and aromantic main character (Nita).

8. The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee Henry "Monty" Montague was bred to be a gentleman. His passions for gambling halls, late nights spent with a bottle of spirits, or waking up in the arms of women or men, have earned the disapproval of his father. His quest for pleasures and vices have led to one last hedonistic hurrah as Monty, his best friend and crush Percy, and Monty's sister Felicity begin a Grand Tour of Europe. When a reckless decision turns their trip abroad into a harrowing manhunt, it calls into question everything Monty knows, including his relationship with the boy he adores. Aro/ace secondary character (prequel to a Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy).

9. The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy by Mackenzi Lee A year after an accidentally whirlwind grand tour with her brother Monty, Felicity Montague has returned to England with two goals in mind—avoid the marriage proposal of a lovestruck suitor from Edinburgh and enroll in medical school. A highly loved book in regards to asexual portrayal, Felicity’s journey does a fantastic job of exploring the struggle of navigating a world where marriage is expected of women in order to function in society. Even more refreshing is Felicity isn’t just avoiding getting married out of a sole rebellion against the patriarchy (though those themes are also present), but simply because she doesn’t have an interest in sexual or romantic relationships at all.

10. Silver in the Mist by Emily Victoria Asexual Devlin has grown up in the shadow of her mother’s impressive spy network—and the shadow of the kingdom, too. A magical mist is eating away at their borders, weakening their magic and making them vulnerable to attacks. Devlin is tasked with infiltrating the royal court of the wealthier neighboring kingdom, but when she befriends their most powerful magic wielder, she discovers an ancient mystery that may hold the key to defeating the mists for good. Victoria prioritizes strong friendships between queer characters and an examination of wealth disparity in this fantasy full of twists and turns.

11. Not Good for Maidens by Tori Bovalino Beneath the streets of York, the goblin market calls to the Wickett women-the family of witches that tends to its victims. For generations, they have defended the old cobblestone streets with their magic. Knowing the dangers, they never entered the market-until May Wickett fell for a goblin girl, accepted her invitation, and became inextricably tied to the world her family tried to protect her from. Told through dual narratives in different timelines, the book essentially has two protagonists: Lou and May. Between these two characters, we have some great queer representation for both asexuality and bisexuality.

12. A Snake Falls to Earth by Darcie Little Badger Themes of magic, family, asexuality, and traditional storytelling dominate in Lipan Apache author Darcie Little Badger's delightful and uplifting second YA novel. A Lipan girl named Nina collides with Oli who is from the land of spirits and monsters. But some people will do anything to keep them apart. This is a wholesome, elegantly written read guaranteed to warm your heart! 

13. Arden Grey by Ray Stoeve Arden Grey is a novel about different kinds of abusive relationships, as well as the strength of family and friendships. Following her parents' separation, Arden is depressed and coming to accept herself as being on the asexual spectrum.

14. It Sounds Like This by Anna Meriano Yasm Trevi didn't have much of a freshman year thanks to Hurricane Humphrey, but she's ready to take sophomore year by storm. That means mastering the marching side of marching band--fast!--so she can outshine her BFF Sofia as top of the flute section, earn first chair, and impress both her future college admission boards and her comfortably unattainable drum major crush Gilberto Reyes. But Yasm steps off on the wrong foot when she reports an anonymous gossip Instagram account harassing new band members and accidentally gets the entire low brass section suspended from extracurriculars. Rep: Biracial Latina fat asexual-questioning cis female MC, Jewish gray-aromantic gray-asexual male side character with ADHD and APD.

15. One for All by Lillie Lainoff In 1655 sixteen-year-old Tania is the daughter of a retired musketeer, but she is afflicted with extreme vertigo and subject to frequent falls; when her father is murdered she finds that he has arranged for her to attend Madame de Treville's newly formed Acadaemie des Mariées in Paris, which, it turns out, is less a school for would-be wives, than a fencing academy for girls--and so Tania begins her training to be a new kind of musketeer, and to get revenge for her father. Rep: disability, asexuality, sapphic side characters, POTS and PTSD.

16. The State of Us by Shaun David Hutchinson When Dean Arnault’s mother decided to run for president, it wasn’t a surprise to anyone, least of all her son. But still that doesn’t mean Dean wants to be part of the public spectacle that is the race for the White House—at least not until he meets Dre. The only problem is that Dre Rosario’s on the opposition; he’s the son of the Democratic nominee. In a moment of solidarity and high emotions, Dean tells Dre that he has been questioning his sexual orientation. He isn’t sure if he’s asexual or demisexual. Dre puts a messaging app on Dean’s phone so they can stay in touch.

17. Scavenge the Stars by Tara Sim When Amaya rescues a mysterious stranger from drowning, she fears her rash actions have earned her a longer sentence on the debtor ship where she’s been held captive for years. Instead, the man she saved offers her unimaginable riches and a new identity, setting Amaya on a perilous course through the coastal city-state of Moray, where old-world opulence and desperate gamblers collide. Amaya wants one thing: revenge against the man who ruined her family and stole the life she once had. Desi, demisexual female protagonist. 

18. Camp by Lev AC Rosen It’s Randy’s fifth year at Camp Outland, a camp where queer teens get a chance to be themselves. Hoping to win over Hudson’s heart—who’s masc and straight passing and only seems to date other guys like himself—Randy has spent the past year reinventing himself: workout regimen, new haircut, new carefully curated wardrobe. His friends and camp counsellor all think it’s a terrible idea, but what can they do but support him anyways?

19. Little Thieves by Margaret Owen Once upon a time, the daughter of death and fortune was a teenage girl and she was the worst. Little Thieves is, as the dedication says, for the gremlin girls, never has there been a more gremlin girl than Vanja Schmidt. A brilliant and brazen swindler, Vanja could give Kaz Brekker a run for his money. But Vanja has bigger fish to fry. As her body rapidly turns into the gemstones she craves, Vanja must put things right and face her greed head on all while juggling her engagement to a terrible margrave, an investigator with his own magic, and the princess whose face she stole. Vanja’s relationship with junior prefect Emeric could not be more demisexual if it tried, with both sides of the romance experiencing asexual spectrum existence in different and complimentary ways. One part Germanic fairytale, one part ensemble heist, Little Thieves is an unhinged romp of a book.

20. Everyone Hates Kelsie Miller by Meredith Ireland Rom-coms and the asexuality spectrum...two great things that go great together. Kelsie and Eric have been competing against each other their whole lives. But desperation forces them to work together. Kelsie’s best friend stopped talking to her and Eric wants to rekindle his relationship with his ex-girlfriend, and since both will be at UPenn at the same time, Eric and Kelsie decide to go on a road trip together. Sparks fly.

21. You Don't Have a Shot by Racquel Marie Valentina "Vale" Castillo-Green's life revolves around soccer. Her friends, her future, and her father's intense expectations are all wrapped up in the beautiful game. But after she incites a fight during playoffs with her long-time rival, Leticia Ortiz, everything she's been working toward seems to disappear. Queer asexual biracial (Colombian, Irish) protagonist.

22. Foul Lady Fortune by Chloe Gong In 1931 Shanghai, two Nationalist spies pose as a married couple to investigate a series of brutal murders causing unrest in the city. Rep: demisexual Chinese protagonist, bisexual Chinese protagonist, bisexual Chinese main character, Chinese trans woman main character, aromantic asexual side character; (Chinese-Kiwi author).

23. The Spy with the Red Ballon by Katherine Locke Siblings Ilse and Wolf hide a deep secret in their blood: with it, they can work magic. And the government just found out. Blackmailed into service during World War II, Ilse lends her magic to America’s newest weapon, the atom bomb, while Wolf goes behind enemy lines to sabotage Germany’s nuclear program. It’s a dangerous mission, but if Hitler were to create the bomb first, the results would be catastrophic. Gay demisexual Jewish protagonist.

24. Beneath the Citadel by Destiny Soria Cassa, the orphaned daughter of rebels, and friends Alys, Evander, and Newt, fight back against the high council of Eldra, which has ruled for centuries based solely on ancient prophesies. Alys, an apothecary-in-training and the level-headed one of the crew. She identifies as asexual.

25. Eliza and Her Monsters by Francesca Zappia Eighteen-year-old Eliza Mirk is the anonymous creator of the wildly popular webcomic Monstrous Sea, but when a new boy at school tempts her to live a life offline, everything she's worked for begins to crumble. Asexual main character, not explicitly stated in the book.

26. Technically, You Started It by Lana Wood Johnson When a guy named Martin Nathaniel Munroe II texts you, it should be obvious who you're talking to. Except there's two of them (it's a long story), and Haley thinks she's talking to the one she doesn't hate. Demisexual main character.

27. Now Entering Addamsville by Francesca Zappia Zora Novak is framed for a crime she didn't commit--in a town obsessed with ghosts, will she be able to find the culprit and clear her name before it's too late? It's a brief mention, but Zora is ace.

28. Fully Disclosure by Camryn Garrett In a community that isn’t always understanding, an HIV-positive teen must navigate fear, disclosure, and radical self-acceptance when she falls in love–and lust–for the first time. One of Simone’s best friends in the book, Claudia, is an asexual lesbian. The unwavering support she gives to Simone is heartwarming, and she is also openly sex-positive—which flips the script on its head regarding what most people would assume of asexual people.

30. The Art of Saving the World by Corinne Duyvis When Hazel Stanczak was born, an interdimensional rift tore open near her family’s home, which prompted immediate government attention. They soon learned that if Hazel strayed too far, the rift would become volatile and fling things from other dimensions onto their front lawn—or it could swallow up their whole town. Hazel Stanczak identifies as asexual, though she spends time in the book questioning it. The book presents a unique way to show that there is not one single way to be asexual—that it exists on a spectrum and can look different for each person.

31. Let's Talk About Love by Claire Kann Alice had her whole summer planned. Non-stop all-you-can-eat buffets while marathoning her favorite TV shows (best friends totally included) with the smallest dash of adulting–working at the library to pay her share of the rent. The only thing missing from her perfect plan? Her girlfriend (who ended things when Alice confessed she’s asexual). Alice is done with dating–no thank you, do not pass go, stick a fork in her, done. Alice is a biromantic and asexual black woman who starts off very confident in her identity as asexual, yet has experiences that have her questioning her orientation and how to talk about it.

32. In the Ravenous Dark by AdriAnne Strickland A pansexual blood mage reluctantly teams up with an undead spirit to start a rebellion among the living and the dead. This book features Japha, an asexual nonbinary character who serves as the best friend to the MC.

33. Seven Ways We Lie by Riley Redgate Life at Paloma High School is much like any other high school, with petty drama, judgmental assholes, and mind-numbing schoolwork. Until it isn’t. A scandal emerges: a student and teacher had an illicit affair. At the center of the scandal are seven teenagers, each with their own secrets, whose lives are transformed as a result of this scandal. One of the characters can be read as asexual (and possibly neurodiverse). He never explicitly labels himself as such, but the way he describes his experiences of [non-]attraction strongly point to him being on the ace spectrum.

34. Quicksilver by R. J. Anderson Tori thought she had left her past behind when she and her family started a new life in a new city. But then Sebastian Faraday reappears in her life to tell her that she’s not quite as safe as she thinks: the relay is still operating and a genetics lab is trying to track her down to figure out the secret behind her unusual biology. Tori is going to have to use all of her considerable technical expertise to escape her past and live the normal human life she’s always wanted to have. Asexual main character.

35. Hullmetal Girls by Emily Skrutskie Aisha Un-Haad, seventeen, and Key Tanaka, eighteen, have risked everything for new lives as mechanically enhanced soldiers, and when an insurrection forces dark secrets to surface, the fate of humanity is in their hands. In Hullmetal Girls, Aisha is not only ace/aro but she is also happy with her identity. Crucially, so is everyone else.

36. Not Even Bones by Rebecca Schaeffer Nita's mother hunts monsters and, after Nita dissects and packages them, sells them online, but when Nita follows her conscience to help a live monster escape, she is sold on the black market in his place. Aro/Ace main character

37. Before I Let Go by Marieke Nijkamp When Corey moves away from Lost Creek, Alaska, she makes her friend Kyra promise to stay strong during the long, dark winter, and wait for her return. Just days before Corey is to return home to visit, Kyra dies. The entire Lost community speaks in hushed tones, saying her death was meant to be. And they push Corey away like she's a stranger. With every hour, Corey's suspicion grows. Lost is keeping secrets-- but piecing together the truth about what happened to her best friend may prove as difficult as lighting the sky in an Alaskan winter. Aro/Ace main character.

38. If It Makes You Happy by Claire Kann Winnie is living her best fat girl life and is on her way to the best place on earth. No, not Disneyland–her Granny’s diner, Goldeen’s, in the small town of Misty Haven. While there, she works in her fabulous 50’s inspired uniform, twirling around the diner floor and earning an obscene amount of tips. With her family and ungirlfriend at her side, she has everything she needs for one last perfect summer before starting college in the fall. …until she becomes Misty Haven’s Summer Queen in a highly anticipated matchmaking tradition that she wants absolutely nothing to do with. Aro/ace secondary character.

39. Dread Nation by Justina Ireland An alternate history where the Civil War was put on hold when zombies started to rise. Almost finished with her education at Miss Preston's School of Combat in Baltimore, Jane is set on returning to her Kentucky home and doesn't pay much mind to the politics of the eastern cities, with their talk of returning America to the glory of its days before the dead rose.But when families around Baltimore County begin to go missing, Jane is caught in the middle of a conspiracy, one that finds her in a desperate fight for her life against some powerful enemies. And the restless dead, it would seem, are the least of her problems. The word asexual is not used, but that fits with the setting, and the explanation goes into a fair amount of detail, also ruling out that she likes women instead.

40. Vespertine by Margaret Rogerson When her convent is attacked by possessed soldiers, Artemisia defends the Gray Sisters by awakening the revenant bound to a saint's relic, even though she runs the risk of being possessed permanently by the powerful ancient spirit. Non-explicit romantic asexual main character. Fantasy.

41. Archivist Wasp by Nicole Kornher-Stace A postapocalyptic ghosthunter escapes her dire fate by joining the ghost of a supersoldier on his quest to the underworld Aromantic asexual main character. Dark fantasy/dystopian.

42. Summer of Salt by Katrina Leno While anyone would love to have a bit of magic, what happens when magic turns dark? Georgina Fernweh will come into her magic someday soon. Before she does, Georgina faces a tragedy that tests the islanders' trust. In this book, Georgina’s best friend Vira is aroace, and it’s addressed somewhat in the story at different points. There is a sweet strength between Georgina and Vira, full of loyalty and support that is lovely to see.

43. The Summer of Bitter and Sweet by Jen Ferguson In this moving and complex narrative, Lou learns to draw boundaries, stand up for herself, all while coming to terms with her demisexuality.

44. The Sound of Stars by Alechia Dow One-third of the human population has died and now the world is about to end. Ellie, a fat, Black, disabled, demisexual girl with access to an illegal library teams up with a music-loving alien to risk their lives to save the world.

45. The Grimrose Girls by Laura Pohl Pohl serves up a veritable smorgasbord of queer fairytale goodies in Grimrose Girls. This tale as old as time follows four students at the prestigious boarding school Grimrose Academy—Ella, Yuki, Rory, and newcomer Nani. When the former three’s best friend dies, all four girls are swept up in a dark and twisted mystery full of old fairytale magic. They must work together to unravel the secrets between them and break an ancient curse that dooms them to a fairytale ending (and not the fun kind). Yuki’s aromantic asexual identity is explored in her relationship to expectations, beauty, and friendship throughout the novel.

46. Radio Silence by Alice Oseman Frances has been a study machine with one goal. Nothing will stand in her way; not friends, not a guilty secret – not even the person she is on the inside. Then Frances meets Aled, and for the first time, she’s unafraid to be herself. So when the fragile trust between them is broken, Frances is caught between who she was and who she longs to be. In this book, Aled identifies as demisexual while Frances identifies as bisexual. The story really pays homage to the importance of friendship, and romantic storylines move to the background in a way we don’t often get in YA literature.

47. This Golden Flame by Emily Victoria Forced to serve her country’s ruling group, Karis wants nothing more than to find her brother. But family bonds don’t matter to the sole focus of unlocking the magic of an ancient automaton army. Karis is ace and other LGBTQ+ characters are introduced throughout.

48. Sawkill Girls by Claire Legrand A horror novel centered around three girls facing off against an unseen monster that preys upon the young women of the island of Sawkill Rock. Features a black asexual girl fresh out of a romantic relationship, as well as a f/f relationship.

49. Love Letters for Joy by Melissa See Less than a year away from graduation, seventeen-year-old Joy is too busy overachieving to be worried about relationships. She’s determined to be Caldwell Prep’s first disabled valedictorian. And she only has one person to beat, her academic rival Nathaniel. But it’s senior year and everyone seems to be obsessed with pairing up. One of her best friends may be developing feelings for her and the other uses Caldwell’s anonymous love-letter writer to snag the girl of her dreams. Joy starts to wonder if she has missed out on a quintessential high school experience. She is asexual, but that’s no reason she can’t experience first love, right?

50. Not Your Backup by C. B. Lee Part 3 in the Sidekick Squad series by C.B. Lee. Follows a questioning aromantic asexual latinx superhero sidekick fighting to prove her worth on the team despite her lack of superpowers, all admist the team's battle against the corrupt League of Heroes.

51. Belle Révolte by Linsey Miller Noble-born Emilie des Marais, 16, wants to become a physician, a role usually forbidden women of her class because of the corruptive toll the magical "noonday arts" exact. Common-born Annette Boucher wants to escape her domineering parents and master the less physically costly "midnight arts" of illusions, divination, and scrying, normally reserved for those who can afford the expensive education. At Emilie's urging, each girl takes the other's place. Miller (Ruin of Stars) writes in lush, dense prose that can require a careful read, but her protagonists' awareness of privilege and desire to challenge the status quo shines through. LGBTQ representation--including gay, trans, and nonbinary characters (Annette identifies as asexual biromantic)--further widens this tale's appeal.

52. Tarnished Are the Stars by Rosiee Thor A secret beats inside Anna Thatcher's chest: an illegal clockwork heart. Anna works cog by cog -- donning the moniker Technician -- to supply black market medical technology to the sick and injured, against the Commissioner's tyrannical laws. Determined to earn his father's respect, Nathaniel sets out to capture the Technician. But the more he learns about the outlaw, the more he questions whether his father's elusive affection is worth chasing at all. This YA novel features an aroace character gradually coming to accept his orientation in the midst of everything else that is happening in his life. Perfect for older teens who also enjoy WLW representation and dark themes.

53. Aces Wild: A Heist by Amanda DeWitt An all-asexual online friend group attempts to break into a high-stakes gambling club and commit a heist together. Includes a male asexual character navigating what love looks like for him, an aromantic asexual Latinx gender-nonconforming boy, a Vietnamese American and German asexual nonbinary teen, and a black asexual girl.

54. Planning Perfect by Haley Neil Summer vacation quickly becomes complicated for Felicity Becker as she tries to plan a perfect wedding for her mom, figure out her feelings for her friend Nancy, and wonder what dating will look like for her as an asexual person.

55. Ace of Hearts by Myriad Augustine Everyone around Alvin seems to be obsessed with one thing-- sex. Alvin finds it uncomfortable to think and talk about it and he knows he isn't ready and may never be. His friends, however, think that all Alvin needs is to hook up with the right guy. But the closer Alvin gets to being physical with someone, the more he's uncertain that this is for him and he begins to wonder if he's asexual. Can Alvin find the love that's right for him?

56. Beyond the Black Door by AdriAnne Strickland Everyone has a soul. Some are beautiful gardens, others are frightening dungeons. Kamia comes to know more about her identity as she decides to battle the forces of evil, no matter the cost... Asexual and demi-romantic main characters. Dark fantasy. Kamai is asexual, but isn’t aromantic—she has an interest in relationships that isn’t always depicted for those who are ace.

57. Loveless by Alice Oseman A queer coming of age story featuring a romance obsessed aromantic asexual main character discovering her sexuality and coming to terms with what that means, and a variety of other queer characters that support her on her journey.

58. Summer Bird Blue by Akemi Dawn Bowman Rumi Seto spends a lot of time worrying she doesn’t have the answers to everything. What to eat, where to go, whom to love. But there is one thing she is absolutely sure of—she wants to spend the rest of her life writing music with her younger sister, Lea. Then Lea dies in a car accident, and her mother sends her away to live with her aunt in Hawaii while she deals with her own grief. While not the main focal point of the book, Rumi does grapple throughout the story about where exactly she lands on the ace and aro spectrum—and whether she has to label herself at all.

59. Meet Cute Diary by Emery Lee In this queer rom-com, a transgender teen must decide if he's dedicated to romantic formulas or open to unpredictable love after an internet troll attack on his blog compels him and a fan to start fake-dating. Through an unlikely friendship with sweet, grounded Devin, who is Cuban American, asexual, and experimenting with pronouns, Noah--initially self-centered and standoffish--learns to value communication and empathy.

60. The Reckless Kind by Carly Heath In 1904 Norway, Asta runs away from her horrible fiancé to live with her two best friends. The three misfits set out to win the annual Christmas sleigh race to prove that they belong together. Queer asexual hard of hearing protagonist with heterochromia of Norwegian descent.

61. Forward March by Skye Quinlan How can band geek Harper have the chance of becoming the First Daughter with a fake dating profile? However, Harper does know that the drumline leader swiped right. Come along with Harper as she explores her truth during her last year of high school. Asexual-questioning cis female MC with anxiety and asthma.

62. Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger What if America had monsters, magic, and interdimensional beings? For Elatsoe, this is real, and she has to uncover her cousin's murder! She can do this with the help of her ghost dog, Kirby, but has to remember not to wake human ghosts. Aromantic ace main character. Paranormal mystery. Casual representation which extends to Ellie’s identity as Lipan Apache. This identity is asserted more often and firmly than her asexuality, and Little Badger drops in nuggets of education for us settlers about what Indigenous people, and the Lipan Apache in particular, suffered at the hands of settlers.

63. All Out: The No-Longer-Secret Stories of Queer Teens Throughout the Ages by Editor Robin Talley A collection of short fantasy stories, featuring a variety of queer characters across multiple sexualities and genders. Features an asexual roller-skating girl from the 70s struggling to explain her identity to her crush.

64. Black Wings Beating by Alex London Twins Brysen and Kylee live in a world that revers the power of the falconers, but in a world where war approaches, they aren’t safe. Hunted for their power, they work together to trap the Ghost Eagle. Kylee is an ace character, focused on protecting her brother.

Graphic Novels

65. A-okay by Jarad Greene Eight grade can be tough, especially if you have acne and bullies, and lose friends. But our relatable asexual and aromantic protagonist, Jay, pulls through. This is a relatable memoir with colorful artwork.

66. How to Be Ace: A Memoir of Growing up Asexual by Rebecca Burgess A comic memoir detailing the author Rebecca Burgess's experience with growing up asexual in a world obsessed with sex. Also talks about her experiences with her own mental health and OCD.

67. Jughead, Volume 1 by Chip Zdarsky A comic book reboot of the Archie comics centered around Jughead Jones. Follows an aromantic asexual main character in typical Archie-style shenanigans. Part 1 of a 3 part series.

68. A Quick & Easy Guide to Asexuality by Molly Muldoon A charming introduction to asexuality, created to shed light on the misconceptions surrounding sex and being asexual. Told by writer Molly Muldoon and cartoonist Will Hernandez, both on the asexual spectrum.

69. Is Love the Answer? by Isaki Uta A poignant coming-of-age story about a young woman coming into her own as she discovers her identity as aromantic asexual. A complete story in a single volume, from the creator of "Mine-kun is Asexual."

Domestic Fiction

70. Have You Seen Luis Velez by Catherine Ryan Hyde Raymond Jaffe feels like he doesn't belong. Not with his mother's new family. Not as a weekend guest with his father and his father's wife. Not at school, where he's an outcast. After his best friend moves away, Raymond has only two real connections: to the feral cat he's tamed and to a blind ninety-two-year-old woman in his building who's introduced herself with a curious question: Have you seen Luis Velez? Mildred Gutermann, a German Jew who narrowly escaped the Holocaust, has been alone since her caretaker disappeared. She turns to Raymond for help, and as he tries to track Luis down, a deep and unexpected friendship blossoms between the two. Raymond is asexual (to be precise, he is aroace) And he is depicted as kind, loving, sensitive and realistic.

Fantasy

71. In the Lives of the Puppets by TJ Klune In a strange little home built into the branches of a grove of trees, live three robots--fatherly inventor android Giovanni Lawson, a pleasantly sadistic nurse machine, and a small vacuum desperate for love and attention. Victor Lawson, a human, lives there too. They're a family, hidden and safe. Protagonist: Vic, A curious, loving, & asexual human.

72. The Bone Season by Samantha Shannon In the mid-21st century major world cities are controlled by a formidable security force and clairvoyant underworld cell member Paige commits acts of psychic treason before being captured by an otherworldly race that would make her a part of their supernatural army. Demisexual main character.

73. The Perfect Assassin by K.A. Doore Divine justice is written in blood. Or so Amastan has been taught. As a new assassin in the Basbowen family, he's already having second thoughts about taking a life. A scarcity of contracts ends up being just what he needs. Until, unexpectedly, Amastan finds the body of a very important drum chief. Until, inevitably, Amastan is ordered to solve these murders, before the family gets blamed. Amastan is asexual and, as it turns out, homoromantic.

74. The Bruising of Quilwa by Naseem Jamnia Firuz-e Jafari was able to escape the slaughter of traditional blood magic practitioners by immigrating to the city-state of Qilwa. But now a terrible disease is spreading through the city, and Firuz believes it comes from ineptly performed blood magic. Now they must find a way to break a cycle of prejudice in order to survive. From the author: it's about an aroace nonbinary refugee healer who is trying to cure a magical plague in their new home while hiding their blood magic.

75. The Midnight Bargain by C. L. Polk The Midnight Bargain is a story "set in a world reminiscent of Regency England, where women's magic is taken from them when they marry. A sorceress must balance her desire to become the first great female magician against her duty to her family. Ysbeta has a clear goal for her life: to discover and share magic. Besides loving learning for its own sake, Ysbeta is asexual, and wealthy in her own right, so the bargaining season offers her literally nothing.

76. Every Heart A Doorway by Seanan McGuire Set in a world where a group of children have the ability to find and enter doorways into magical worlds, and now must find who's targetting them for this ability. Lead by an female asexual main character, with a trans love interest. First book in a series of novellas.

Science Fiction

77. The First Sister by Linden A. Lewis She's a priestess of the Sisterhood, traveling the stars alongside the soldiers of Earth who own the rights to her body and soul. When her former captain abandons her, First Sister's hopes for freedom are dashed and she is forced to stay on her ship with no friends, no status, and a new captain she knows nothing about. When the Mother, leader of her order, asks her to spy on Captain Saito Ren, First Sister discovers that sacrificing for the war effort is so much harder to do when your loyalties are split. He climbed his way out of the slums to become an elite soldier of Venus, but now he's haunted by his failures and the loss of his partner Hiro. But when Lito learns that Hiro is alive, but a traitor, and he's assigned to hunt Hiro down, and kill them, Lito must decide what he is actually fighting for - the society that raised him, or himself. As the battle to control Ceres reaches a head, Lito and First Sister must decide what - and whom - they are willing to sacrifice in the name of duty, or for love. Hispanic panromantic asexual protagonist (Lito).

78. Firebreak by Nicole Kornher-Stace Mal is one of many war survivors in the old town working multiple jobs to scrimp by, one of which is her team's streaming video game play. The team lives with several other roommates in a converted hotel room run by Stellaxis, the company that owns half of town, and is the only legal provider of drinkable water. When Mal catches sight of an elusive SecOps character, special non-player characters (NPCs) modeled after Stellaxis' twelve bioengineered operatives, the team pursues her inside the game to catch her on video for two seconds before their power curfew kicks in. By the time Mal heads down for her daily ration of water, they've secured a lucrative contract, involving an in-person meeting and a conspiracy theory, paying them to capture images of the three living SecOps characters. When Mal returns to find out why the next payment failed, she becomes involved in a fracas that will endanger everyone she knows. Aroace main character.

79. To be Taught, If Fortunate by Becky Chambers Four astronauts set out to explore the galaxy. This journey spans centuries and many worlds. A thought provoking read that explores the themes of loneliness and sense of purpose. Excellent cast of diverse characters and vivid world building. Chikondi is asexual and the text is careful to note that his relationship to the protagonist is no less emotional or vital than those she shares with people she is sexually involved with.

80. The Circus Infinite by Khan Wong What better person to take down a crime boss than a mixed-species fugitive! Join Jes on this exciting tale of espionage, torture, demolition. Sex-averse panromantic asexual lead character

Historical Fiction

81. Kaikeyi by Vasihnavi Patel The only daughter of the kingdom of Kekaya, she is raised on grand stories about the might and benevolence of the gods. Yet she watches as her father unceremoniously banishes her mother, her own worth measured by how great a marriage alliance she can secure. And when she calls upon the gods for help, they never seem to hear. Desperate for some measure of independence, she turns to the ancient texts she once read with her mother and discovers a magic that is hers alone. Kaikeyi is asexual and aromantic. Although the words "asexual" and "aromantic" aren't used in the book.

Western

82. The Complete Lady Ruth Constance Chapelstone Chronicles by L. C. Mawson If you’re looking for steampunk magic, the Lady Ruth Constance Chapelstone novellas are the place for you. Read them individually or all together in this compendium. Chapelstone is interested in her inventions, not love and romance.

Paranormal

83. The Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives in Your Homes by Joseph Fink Told in a series of eerie flashbacks, the story of The Faceless Old Woman goes back centuries to reveal an initially blissful and then tragic childhood on a Mediterranean Estate in the early nineteenth century, her rise in the criminal underworld of Europe, a nautical adventure with a mysterious organization of smugglers, her plot for revenge on the ones who betrayed her, and ultimately her death and its aftermath, as her spirit travels the world for decades until settling in modern-day Night Vale. Asexual secondary character.

Romance  

84. All the Wrong Places by Ann Gallagher After his three ex-girlfriends in a row leave Brennan because he's not fulfilling their sexual needs, he seeks out advice from Zafir, the owner of a sex shop. Zafir introduces Brennan to the concept of asexuality and slowly something more blossoms between them.

85. That Kind of Guy by Talia Hibbert Rae needs a fake date to take to her ex's wedding and convinces Zach, a close friend who has recently discovered that he is demisexual, to play along.

86. The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood In an attempt to convince her best friend that she really is over her ex-boyfriend, grad-student Olive panic kisses stern associate professor Adam in the hallway. (Olive is coded as demisexual/graysexual, but that label is never used in the book).

87. Far From Home by Lorelie Brown The oddest of odd couples finds unexpected joy in Brown’s warm, sweet contemporary romance. American citizen Rachel, a not-quite-asexual assistant film producer struggling to make a living in L.A., is drowning in student debt; Indian immigrant Pari Sadashiv, a lesbian logistics manager, needs a U.S. green card to advance her career. When Rachel offers to marry Pari in exchange for funds, it’s just party banter at first—but what’s to stop them from crafting a friendship with legal and financial benefits? Their platonic plans quickly go awry as Pari’s mother moves in to help plan the wedding, forcing them to live their lie. As Rachel feels herself awakening to an attraction she didn’t even know was possible, Pari has to decide whether she can live with the possible fallout of Rachel’s tentative first foray into same-sex love.

88. Kiss Her Once for Me by Alison Cochrun Last Christmas, Ellie met Jack in Powell’s when they both went for a copy of Alison Bechdel’s Fun Home, and over a cute argument over “shared custody”, and Jack poking gentle fun at Ellie (who had been crying alone and talking to a footstool as if it were her friend) they start to bond. Jack asks Ellie for coffee, and then they end up spending the whole day together. This is a big deal for Ellie, who is demisexual, and rarely develops attractions to anyone. And then Jack breaks her heart. Fast-forward to this Christmas when Andrew, the landlord who owns the building she works in, asks her to fake-marry him so he can access his inheritance, and shenanigans lead to her agreeing to this and to going home with him for Christmas, and surprise! Jack is Andrew’s sister.

89. The Charm Offensive by Alison Cochrun Tech wunderkind Charlie has never really been interested in dating, but agrees to join the cast of reality show 'Ever After.' While there he finds himself charmed by his producer, Dev, and questioning his sexuality. The Charm Offensive includes a conversation discussing asexuality and its spectrum.

90. Never Been Kissed by Timothy Janovsky Wren Roland has never been kissed, but he wants that movie-perfect ending more than anything. Thanks to Mateo’s boyfriend, he learns about demisexuality and realizes that when he came out as gay, he had not finished realizing truths about himself and intimate relationships.

91. How to be a Normal Person by TJ Klune Before The House on the Cerulean Sea blew up, Klune wrote this quirky and delightful story of two asexual people finding each other and their happily ever after.

92. Soft on Soft by Mina Waheed This super sweet, low-angst romance centers on two fat, queer women of colour (one Black and one Persian-Arab) who fall in love and find their happy ending with hardly any drama. There’s also anxiety representation. It’s just pure fluffy romance goodness. Demisexual protagonist.

Non-Fiction

93. Ace and Aro Journeys: A Guide to Embracing your Asexual or Aromantic Identity by The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project What does it mean to be ace or aro? How should I approach the challenges that come with being ace or aro? How can I best support the ace and aro people in my life? Join the The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project (TAAAP) for a deep dive into the process of discovering and embracing your ace and aro identities. Empower yourself to explore the nuances of your identity, find and develop support networks, explore different kinds of partnership, come out to your communities and find real joy within. Combining a rigorous exploration of identity and sexuality models with hundreds of candid and poignant testimonials -- this companion vouches for your personal truth, wherever you lie on the aspec spectrum. You are not invisible! You are among friends.

94. Being Ace: An Anthology of Queer, Trans, Femme, and Disabled Stories of Asexual Love and Connection by Editor Madeline Dyer Discover the infinite realms of asexual love across sci-fi, fantasy, and contemporary stories From a wheelchair user racing to save her kidnapped girlfriend and a little mermaid who loves her sisters more than suitors, to a slayer whose virgin blood keeps attracting monsters, the stories of this anthology are anything but conventional. Whether adventuring through space, outsmarting a vengeful water spirit, or surviving haunted cemeteries, no two aces are the same in these 14 unique works that highlight asexual romance, aromantic love, and identities across the asexual spectrum

95. Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex by Angela Chen A non-fiction research book about the asexual perspective on society's facinations with love and sex, and the misconceptions about what being asexual really is and what it means to a person.

96. The Invisible Orientation: an Introduction to Asexuality by Julia Sondra Decker An introduction to what asexuality is, both for people who don't know what that means and for people that may be questioning their own sexuality. It aims to puts asexual people's experiences in context, as they move through a very sexualized world.

97. Gender Queer: A Memoir by Maia Kobabe A graphic memoir about author Kobabe's growing from adolescence to adulthood, as e explores eir gender identity and sexuality. Features a gender queer and asexual main character that uses e/eir pronouns.

98. Ace Voices What it Means to Be Asexual, Aromantic, Demi or Grey-Ace by Eris Young This is the ace community in their own words. Drawing upon interviews with a wide range of people across the asexual spectrum, Eris Young is here to take you on an empowering, enriching journey through the rich multitudes of asexual life.

99. I Am Ace: Adice on Living Your Best Asexual Life by Cody Daigle-Orians Tackling everything from what asexuality is, the asexual spectrum and tips on coming out, to intimacy, relationships, acephobia and finding joy, this guide will help you better understand your asexual identity alongside deeply relatable anecdotes drawn from Cody's personal experience.

100. Sounds Fake But Okay: An Asexual and Aromantic Perspective on Love, Relationships, Sex, and Pretty Much Anything Else by Sarah Costello and Kayla Kaszyca Drawing on their personal stories, and those of aspec friends all over the world, prepare to explore your microlabels, investigate different models of partnership, delve into the intersection of gender norms and compulsory sexuality and reconsider the meaning of sex - when allosexual attraction is out of the equation.

I haven't read all of these books, so I can't guarantee all of them. But I did my best researching all of them. I was making this list on my own and I was amazed that I could find over 100 books with asexual characters and I wanted to share it!

The Aromantic Book List is now out!

Tagging some people who were excited about this list: @sweetspiderstew @majorgenerally @shayberri789 @53rdcenturyhero @knightoflodis @neonghost39 @rosaazulina

[caracalliope]

REALLY GOOD THOUGHTS, apologies in advance for how rambling this is going to get.

Gabi and Sir are both convinced that he is necessary to her solving cases, and I joke that she can replace him with a magic 8-ball or daily horoscope or something, because he just gives her a general insight into humanity, and then she solves the case. He barely offers a nudge.

It's possible this is just because TV writing requires compromises, and it's more dynamic this way than if Sir delivered the solution Poirot-style. BUT what is fandom if not an excuse for overthinking? So what I read into it is that Gabi needs him to think her darker thoughts for her. His insights are often cynical, they are about humanity's selfishness, even if it's just as basic as "older siblings get jealous and destructive sometimes". It's not like Gabi is naive, but maybe she is more efficient when she can outsource those thoughts. Plus, the cases often reflect something she's going through emotionally, and Sir tells her things she knows but doesn't want to admit about herself.

But! I love that her shadow self cares about her and protects her too. Like, sometimes in a terrible and dangerous and jealous way, but he is still on Gabi's side.

One thing that stood out to me in S1 is that Gabi doesn't - didn't - have a private life at all. S1 Gabi is always On, always working toward her goal of protecting the whole world from suffering like she suffered. All her friends are her coworkers, and she talks to them in the same measured, passionate way she talks to the cameras [well, except that time she was avoiding Lacey, but that was deeply uncharacteristic]. She has feelings for Trent on some level, kind of, but she's also happy to use him to further her goals -- and to keep him at a distance outside of that, always aware of how easily he could turn against her. And it also works in the other direction: she doesn't have the luxury of keeping her personal history personal, when she's such a well-known kidnapping survivor, so she is ruthless about turning that personal narrative into something she can use to help people. She also can't stop being a famous Black woman specifically, and she uses that too when she can, if it can help her get people home. There is never any respite for her.

But in the basement, it was different. She could be FURIOUS in a non-useful way, she could be horny, she could be unfair and cruel. She could put aside all the very correct things she knows about self-acceptance and recovery, and she could be chaotic and vulnerable instead. And this gnawed at her constantly, a source of guilt, a thing she tried to deny but kept coming back to.

And Sir never judged that part; he never even left the basement of his own volition. It was only when she decided to end things, and to sacrifice herself, that he started tormenting her this way. So, if he's her shadow self, then getting rid of him and making herself a martyr in the process: definitely not the way to go.

I've never seen Star Trek, but I love the example you described about Kirk! I genuinely have no clue whatsoever what Gabi is eventually going to do with Sir. Kill him? Put a ring on him? Put him back into the basement? Watch him die to save her? Will it remain ambiguous? Whatever happens to him personally, I think Gabi will be Changed, and her soul will become less fractured in some way. And darker in a healing way, perhaps.

[as an aside, I think that ambiguity over Is It Ever Going to Be Canon and What Would That Even Look Like makes it Hannibalesque in a way I find pleasing. Like! It's not a Sleepy Hollow situation, I trust Nkechi Okoro Carroll to always keep prioritizing Gabi, and if a love story is the best way to do that, then that's what will happen. But the genre and tone of the show is all fascinatingly chaste, and Sir wants Gabi primarily to be his family instead of his lover, and it lands in that pleasing grey zone of mounting Tension and Desire that's also mired in metaphor and intense rituals (the shaving). It's rare for a het ship! It's irresistible to me!]

It's tempting to get completely absorbed in the unhinged premise of Found, or to get caught-up in the chemistry and tension between leads Shanola Hampton and Mark Paul Gosseler. Many fans are intrigued by the potential of a dark romance between their characters, but if you don't take a moment to analyze it a little further you'll miss that something rare and unusual is happening on the show.

And that's a female character exploring her relationship with darkness in a way that's often reserved for male characters in shows like Hannibal, Interview With The Vampire or You.

As someone who has watched all four shows I often found myself wondering why don't we rarely see dynamics like this with women --I couldn't get into killing Eve-- and what I landed on was that well no one wants to see a woman in that kind of toxic dynamic with a man because of how frequently that happens IRL and the terrible consequences.

But Found manages to create this toxic dynamic by starting the story with its female lead in the position of power. She has Sir her former tormenter locked and chained in her basement. She controls his food, his entertainment, and his life. She has the power whether she feels it fully or not.

Starting the story this point levels what would otherwise be a very unlevel playing field and allows the story to linger in the tension and uncertainty of who Gabrielle Mosely is as a person. Whether or not she can heal from the trauma she suffered as teenager and integrate her dark and light sides or if she will be forever tormented and controlled by this aspect of herself.

I want to write a longer meta about this comparing these stories and the relationships between these characters and how fascinating it is to have a female character exploring her dark side on screen in this way. I have to watch the latest episode of Found first though along with at least reviewing some of the plot points of the shows I mentioned.

But Found, Gabrielle Mosely and this idea of Sir as her shadow-self is sort of living rent free in my head right now and something has to get out on paper.

[spiderman2-99]

Día De Muertos is supposed to be a celebration. When the dead return home, the day is filled with festivals, family, home-cooked food, and the bright smell of marigolds.

But Miguel O’Hara has no family, is too miserable to leave the apartment, and all the marigolds have gone extinct.

They’ve been extinct since 2095, actually. How hadn’t he known? That should've been something he'd figured out sooner, right? But no, he finds out a week before the day itself while he’s trying to make Gabriella’s ofrenda.

What does his beloved baby girl, who he would’ve given the world a thousand times over, get instead? Paper flowers.

Paper flowers instead of real ones, possessions that represented her instead of properly being hers, a half-done altar that was done in a manic, grief-fueled haze.

It’s paltry. Miguel knows it is. But it’s all he can give, and by God, he hates it. He tried to make it up in home-made pan de muerto and fresh fruit and her favorite dinners, in the carefully arranged papel picado garlands, in finding actual copal to burn… but it’s not enough. It could never be enough.

It’s been a long time since he’d last made an ofrenda, actually. He fell out of the tradition sometime when he was in college, when he was young and unburdened and selfish and so, so stupid, and had convinced himself he had much more important things to do with his time than honor traditions.

Sometimes, he wants to reach out to that little twerp and beat him senseless.

No, he wants to laugh, or scream, or pull his hair out. It’s a sick joke; a cruel jab at his expense, that he only started giving a shit about his own cultural holidays again after Gabi died, when he could no longer share the homemade food with her, help her learn about the significance.

It feels so wrong, being unable to share this with his daughter. Having the altar be dedicated to her, instead of her helping him set it up; teaching her how to make the banners and arrange flowers and bake bread, entertaining whatever thousands of questions she’d have about the holiday and her great-great-whoever’s they’d be celebrating. What would she have thought of the chicken and chile rellenos? Of the Calaveritas? The toys he left out?

Hijo de puta. A parent isn’t supposed to outlive their child.

It’s a pathetic altar too, as far as he’s concerned. Miguel hadn't done this in so long that he'd nearly forgotten how to; having to go on the internet just to remember the guidelines. Even then, there were so many conflicting answers that it left him confused and flying blind the whole damn time.

Did he do enough as a father to honor her? Did the ofrenda do her memory justice? Did he do anything right? Is there enough salt to purify her body? Enough water and food to provide for her long journey? Was the copal actually supposed to be incense, or did it have a different meaning? Are the purple candles placed correctly? Would tissue paper marigolds, devoid of scent and life, be enough guide her safely back home?

These worries swarm like vultures to a carcass, picking at and tormenting him to the point where he can barely stand to look at the stupid, thrown-together thing any longer. He should know how to do this— today is much more than just a holiday; Día de Muerto and all of its rich traditions should be a part of who he is, steeped in his identity, his culture. It should be more familiar than breathing.

But now it just makes him ache, seeing how he couldn’t even properly commemorate his own little girl.

In a brief moment of clarity, Miguel realizes he really just should’ve just taken more time to research and plan it out better. If only it weren’t for the constant high-stakes responsibilities, the needs of far too many all on his shoulders, the people, people, people.

Not like he didn’t try; Halloween and all day yesterday, Miguel had been rushing uncharacteristically through work, trying to get caught up enough to take time off. But of course, God had it out for him and practically half the damn Society wanted to barge into his office to badger him about something. He ended up with a shock-ton of random gifts and baked goods on his desk that he’d unceremoniously pawned off to Peter B. (save for a bottle of Don Julio, but the other man didn’t need to know that), enough sanguine well-wishes to last him a lifetime, and high blood pressure.

And the time and effort he scraped up still wasn’t enough to get it done right. It could never be good enough. He could never be good enough.

Miguel can’t stop second-guessing himself, can’t stop that all too familiar spiral of guilt and self-loathing that rots away at his insides like necrosis. He’s a scientist and an engineer, for shocksake— logic and reason should override his emotions, should stop them from clouding him at all. But all he can do is sit there, staring at the sorry excuse for an ofrenda with a lump in his throat and a throbbing headache that won’t go away.

Today couldn’t have gone any worse.

His joints pop viciously as he gets up from the floor just to prove him wrong. Cristo en el cielo.

The only bright side to this whole thing is that… well, no one is here. No one to see his embarrassment, or his failure; no one to question him, or ask him how he’s feeling, or try to give a hug, or any more goddamn food. It’s just him and his ever-spiraling thoughts and the grief that threatens to consume him whole.

Carefully, with a trembling hand, he lights the incense, then the candles, the golden glow dancing around his otherwise dark apartment. It… almost makes it look better. Less like a broken down man’s sorry attempt at repentance and more like a proper ofrenda.

Almost.

Día De Muertos is supposed to be a celebration, filled with festivals, family, home-cooked food, and the bright smell of marigolds.

But Miguel O’Hara has no family, is too miserable to leave the apartment, and all the marigolds have gone extinct.

[sweetimpurity]

Beach day fluff! Had to get this out of my drafts! Too bad summer is ending ;(

I love imagining Miguel coming out of the water glistening and perfect, drinking beer in the pool and playing with Gabi in the water at the beach. But after thinking about it, I think that Miguel would actually be a huge ‘poolside princess’

It would apply to both being at the pool with him and going to the beach. Even if you’re going with Gabi and the group, Peter and Mj with their kids and Jess with her family too. Maybe even Gwen and Miles join as well, the whole gang could be there. And he’s watching them all splash and play in the water and in the sand, all from the comfort of under the umbrella.

It took you literal days to convince him to come to the beach with everyone. It was a planned day and originally you were just going to take Gabriella and meet up with everybody else.

He gave you a list of reasons why he didn’t want to go but you asked him again and again and it finally came out. He didn’t want to feel left out.

“So come with us, we want you to come” You insist. An easy answer to the problem. “No, it’s better for me to just stay here. I’m a buzzkill at the beach, believe me.” He insists. You don’t believe him. And you keep trying to accommodate him and make him feel comfortable. He’s your husband, of course you want him to be included and feel comfortable at the same time.

It’s the heat. Miguel gets so hot and then he gets irritable and angry and frustrated. So he’s given up on trying to have fun at the beach. You’re determined to change that. You bought a new umbrella and new beach chairs this year. You brought cold water and cut up fruit in the cooler.

Gabriella couldn’t be more excited that her father is joining everyone. She bounds with excitement as you’re all getting ready. You’re helping her into her lilac bathing suit and trying to put some sunscreen on her little face to protect her baby skin. Miguel helps you pack everything into the car and grab Gabi’s swimming stuff from the garage.

And when you make it there, meeting Peter B and Mj, Jess and her husband and all the little ones running around, you set up shop and open the umbrella, insisting to your slightly grumpy hubby that everything will be fine and he’ll be comfortable. He keeps his darkest sunglasses on because thats the other thing. The sun is so harsh on his eyes. That’s why he keeps the lights mostly off in his office. His eyes are so sensitive to light and the sun reflecting off the water is like knives to his corneas.

And it’s also been so long since he’s been to the beach that he hasn’t really gone swimming in a while. Probably convinced himself that the water will be too cold and overstimulate him too.

“There’s a breeze, baby…” You smile, trying to make it seem fun and like he won’t have a horrible time. It’s not that he wants to be a grump, it’s just that he knows he’s not fun at the beach and he doesn’t want to ruin the day for everyone else. “You just sit and relax, okay? If you’re hot let me know…” you hold his face, pecking his smiling lips before turning to meet Gabi by the water and he gently slaps your bum on the way over. He couldn’t resist. You’re wearing that bathing suit he really loves.

Giggling and glancing back at him as you’re walking away and catching that smile on his face. Oh yeah. You’re determined to make him have fun today.

You, Peter B, Gabi and Mayday all make a huge sandcastle with a moat and are decorating the walls with seashells that the kids found. Miguel watches, smiling and feeling the slight breeze on his skin from the safety of the shade. It’s still hot but he’s not burning up and your kindness and care makes him feel a million times better anyway. He's really grateful for your patience.

“Papa! Come in the water please please porfi!” Gabi squeals, running over to him with her floaties on her arms, grabbing his large hand and trying to pull him up. He coos to her in soft spoken Spanish and you shake your head grinning, walking up to the both of them under the umbrella. “Gabi girl… let Papa stay cool okay?” You try to urge your daughter, but seeing Miguel get up surprises you.

“Yeah, I’ll come in.” He says it like it’s nothing. “You will??!” You and Gabi both squeal in unison. It’s like a miracle, neither of you can believe. “Come on come on!” Gabi practically screams, pulling his hand and he emerges from under the shade and into the sun. You smile watching the sun wash over his back. His skin glowing and broad muscular back on full display. That’s the other thing you’ve been missing out on. How dare he deprive you of his perfection?

You run up beside them, grabbing your husband’s other hand, the three of you walking to the water and Gabi runs in first. She’s already been a little fish all day so the water feels warm to her. “Come on babe…” You encourage and he winces slightly at the freezing water lapping over his legs. His senses going off like alarms. His sensitivity to temperature and changes in the environment are just so strong and unpredictable. It amazes you that such a big indestructible man can be so sensitive but that's what you love about him. “Just give me a minute…” He nods, still holding your hand and standing knee deep, adjusting and watching Gabi frolic around in the shallows. You wait with him patiently, giving him all the time in the world to be comfortable. Leaning into him and wrapping your arm around his waist, your hand on the hot skin of his back, head on his shoulder. He rests his head on yours, both watching your daughter having the time of her life. His big hand running up your side and to the back of your neck, just glad that he's here and included in today's fun.

"Okay I'm ready." He suddenly says, stepping forward and marching past Gabriella who's trying to grab onto his legs, giggling all the way. "You can take it slow!" You call to him. Is he crazy? He's just gonna go in just like that?

"Daddy I'm swimming too!" Little Gabi tries to follow him as the water gets deeper and then in the blink of an eye, Miguel's completely submerged with a big splash. You eyes widen with a gasp and Gabi squeals with excitement. Peter B and Jess hollering from the beach, watching the scene unfolding.

You don't see him, not under the crashing waves and the splash that erupted when he crashed into the water, not until Gabi's squealing and her father lifts her up from under the water, her little arms wrapping around him as he emerges from the blue glistening ripples. "I got you!" He growls and she giggles and squeals, her little voice spouting a million words at once, she's just so excited.

"My god..." You sigh, smiling and shaking your head. How did you get so lucky? You walk deeper into the water, kneeling down in the shallows where Gabi stands on Miguel's lap. Splashing each other gently in the water and having fun. "Ma!" Gabi whines, reaching out to you and trying to wrap her arms around the both of you at once. The freezing water from her skin making your back break out in goosebumps.

"Gabi! May found hermit crabs!" Peter calls from the shore. A group of them crowded around Mayday chattering excitedly about her finds. "Oooh!" Gabriella squeals, running off and out of the water to see.

"Whiplash..." Miguel sighs, shaking his head and smiling at Gabi's excitement and moving closer to you in the water. Sitting on the sand as the water laps around your waist and arms, the waves crashing on you two. "Yeah, right?" You laugh softly, watching Gabi run off to the rest of the group on the beach and making sure she's safely on the sand.

"You're right, this was fun. You having fun?" He asks, lifting a hand to your shoulder, the freezing cold water giving you shivers at it meets your hot sun kissed skin. "I'm having a lot of fun..." You smile, looking in his eyes. "More fun now that you're having fun too"

He smiles warmly, rubbing your back gently with his hand. The water lapping around you both in the shallows. Gabi is still on the beach with everyone, squealing and giggling about hermit crabs in May's blue bucket. Her little voice seems to carry across the whole beach.

You lean on Miguel, your head on his chest, your backs to the horizon and watching your little girl bounding across the sand.