#future Schmitty

[magicalincorrectrobodokiquotes]

Future!Schmitty: “Look, sometimes you have to not be 100% honest with people even when the instructions say you need to.”

Future!Radley: “That seems counter productive.”

Future!Schmitty: “ Well, sometimes people use that information to be assholes. That’s just life. If you don’t have a good relationship with someone like that, just give the bare minimum of honesty required.

But that being said, yeah you probably shouldn’t have worded the sentence like that, but if the teacher says be honest in the instructions, and you were honest, and they get mad at you like THAT, then they don’t know you as a person. Just be glad you didn’t get this life lesson at the cost of your grade, okay, kiddo?” *rustling hair*

Future!Radley: “Thanks, Dad.”

(Source: convo between the mod booloo and her dad about a teachers scathing review of my grade assessment)

[pigspeetsandhooflikefeets]

[aftermath of this audio]

Timmy: What I win?

Schmitty: You, young sir, walk away with the satisfaction of knowing that you're... a good speller!

Timmy: That stinks! I want a thousand dollars! And a horsie! Pronto!

Schmitty: Oh, hahaha. That's so adorable! Okay Timmy, why don't you try spelling "you little mother[BLEEP]"?

[k1stune]

Look at you! Getting the future you always wanted

Just don’t look back what you sacrificed for it

(Hey you wanna hear me yap about a buzzpipe au I had in my mind for months?)

I mentioned this au on an ask before and even talked about it on the jackbox server, but it’s basically an au where buzz becomes the host of YDKJ full stream instead of cookie

Long story short buzz sees that cookie and Schmitty are still getting a lot of fame, very envious that the rest of the hosts had their time to shine in YDKJ while instead he was made fun of and forgotten buzz swears that one day he’ll make them regret

buzz’s determination to achieve his goal gets the attention of binjpipe and while working on full stream she decides to hire buzz instead of cookie seeing him as an easier target to manipulate

When it’s time for the first episode to air buzz gets knocked out and put in the simulation, Everything is fine at first buzz is happy with his job somehow even becoming friends with binjpipe but everything changes when escape the simulation happens

It’s the same as ETS but with a catch, with every reset he forgets something about his old life, all the good moments he spent with Nate and the other hosts vanished and the only thing that remained was a bitter feeling, so when he realises that the show was a simulation all along he doesn’t want to leave

Its not real,the show is nothing but a lie and yet it’s the best thing that has ever happened to him,he was denied of a second chance by them even by his own cousin, binjpipe was the only one who helped him, only her

And so e continues to live upon a lie, refusing help from Nate when e tries to free him, going along with binjpipes plans of getting the rest of the YDKJ hosts under binjpipe’s control

Oh I also made few doodles and a reff sheet

This au is quite old so I’m unsure if want to continue it since I’m not as interested in it as I was before but it is a fun one i finally decided to talk about

[ask-creaturebox-household]

A new ask blog beginneth

Hello! I’m really excited for this blog, so I’m going to just run down a few things.

This is an ask blog for an au where many of the Jackbox/You Don’t Know Jack hosts are various supernatural species, with a focus on the OG 5. I am writing a fic about this too, but this takes place way in the future and allows me to touch on plot points I am so far away from. Also: this is a writing heavy ask blog, so responses will be color coded. I may draw or show pictures occasionally. Idk. So, without further ado, here’s some character info for what exactly everyone is and how they’ll respond.

Schmitty: she/it; born vampire; purple text

Cookie: he/him; ghost; pink text

Guy: he/him; Dog(?); green text

Nate: he/she/they; turned vampire; red text

Buzz: he/him; human; orange text

Now for some rules:

-Please be respectful. I don’t want to see any bigoted asks or comments on this blog. That results in an immediate block. Please feel free to tease or mess with the characters though. There’s just a line.

-Please don’t send discourse or any asks about current events/politics. This isn’t the place.

-I don’t know how long it’ll take me to respond to shit. It may take me a minute or a month. Just because I respond to someone else first doesn’t mean I’m ignoring you. I just may need more time to figure out an answer.

-Please don’t send any NSFW asks. I’m very much fine with sex jokes but anything else is stuff I’d rather not get into.

I’ll add more rules when I think of them.

Now with that out of the way…

Happy Asking!!

[wrongydkjquotes]

Cookie Masterson: You said past, present, future… like A Christmas Carol? The Dickens story, the Bill Murray movie with Bobcat Goldthwait?

Schmitty, playing the role as Marley: Yes, yes, like the Dickens book, and the Bill Murray movie, and every other adaptation nobody asked for.

Helen: CUT!

(Source: Spirited (2022))

[warnerswilsons]

I have a sona now I guess?

This is Beesty, they use a they/it pronouns, and they’re a vampire toon who lives at The Bottom™️.

Most of the info on it is based around jackbox/ydkj, but it can pop up in any piece of media I’m interested, most notably Animaniacs, JJBA, and possibly others in the future.

Theyre relatively friendly but will that doesn’t mean that they’re not easily provoked and angered, and it’s super protective of and attached to Schmitty in particular. Most others are just confused or possibly threatened by it, regardless of whatever world they’re in. They’ve even been mistaken for a Warner.

I think that’s all for now so here’s a design for it using @hellosunnycore’s picrew

I love this creature so much.

[heralds-bah-commune]

Hey! Here with a loaded ask! I loved the Unus Annus duo, and was wondering if I could get a Subsys to tack onto the Mark!

I'd love the Subsys to be (level 4s):

Night Guard Markiplier from Random Encounters FNAF Musical

Markiplier from A Heist With Markiplier

Markiplier from In Space With Markiplier

And a fourth Markiplier of your choice!

Feel free to get as wacky as you'd like with them 👍

hi pookie! decided to go with animatronic warfstache, my beloved bot. obviously 3/4 of these guys could be named mark, but i'm not gonna just give you a bunch of guys named mark, so hopefully the alt names are good :) here you go!

a new flower has blossomed! 🌹

markiplier subsystem ... [LVL 4 PACK]

subsys name(s) ;; the spooky subsystem, the ego subsystem, the egos, mark + friends

collective name(s) ;; mark, eddie, dark

collective pronouns ;; he/him, they/them

══════════════════

name(s) ;; schmitty, mike, bill, nightguard

pronouns ;; he/him, they/them, it/its, kill/kills, stab/stabs, night/nights, guard/guards, protect/protectors

age ;; 25

species ;; human

gender(s) ;; morfinalboyic

orientation(s) ;; gay

role(s) ;; nighttime paranoia holder, protector

source ;; FNAF the musical

sign-off(s) ;; – 🩸🤖

══════════════════

hex code ;; #de1717 (crimson)

personality ;; erratic and easily frightened. they are quick to resort to violence. night is perseverant, and has strong leadership qualities.

bonus info ;; n/a

══════════════════

likes ;; fireball, card games, darts, boxing, bright coloured hair

dislikes ;; the dark, animatronics, halloween

possible front triggers ;; nighttime paranoia, its source

══════════════════

cisid(s) ;; nightguard, Wasian (German/Korean), ADHD

transid(s) ;; transMurderer, transCyberneticEnhancements, transRace (transWhite), transRedHair

trisid(s) ;; trisViolent

kink/fetish/para(s) ;; hybristophilia, CNC, hoplophilia

══════════════════

name(s) ;; harry, clyde, black

pronouns ;; it/its, he/him

age ;; 28–39 (ageslider)

species ;; human

gender(s) ;; cisgender man

orientation(s) ;; pansexual, aroflux

role(s) ;; subsys co-host

source ;; a heist with markiplier

sign-off(s) ;; – 🔦💰

══════════════════

hex code ;; #141641 (bunting)

personality ;; suave and insightful. it's quite smart when it needs to be. he is always looking ahead towards the future, planning out exactly how he wants it to be. it has a dirty sense of humour.

bonus info ;; n/a

══════════════════

likes ;; true crime, mystery files (youtube series), the henry stickmin collection, dark clothing

dislikes ;; bright colours, not being taken seriously

possible front triggers ;; his source, henry stickmin

══════════════════

cisid(s) ;; Wasian (German/Korean), ADHD

transid(s) ;; transWealthy, blackAmian, permaGloved, ADHDnull

kink/fetish/para(s) ;; jeuliephilia, frotteurism, nyctophilia

══════════════════

name(s) ;; matey, jenks, neptune, galaxy

pronouns ;; he/him, she/her, they/them, star/stars, space/spaces

age ;; 32

species ;; human

gender(s) ;; spacelexic

orientation(s) ;; bisexual

role(s) ;; socializer, assistant

source ;; in space with markiplier

sign-off(s) ;; – 🚀🧊

══════════════════

hex code ;; #fab84d (casablanca)

personality ;; comedic and helpful (or at least he tries to be). they're charming in a himbo sort of way. she's eccentric and odd. he is friendly and caring.

bonus info ;; keeps a diary (formatted like a captain's log)

══════════════════

likes ;; space, astronomy, science fiction, video games

dislikes ;; gore, insects, spiders

possible front triggers ;; researching space, "space is cool", being outdoors at night

══════════════════

cisid(s) ;; Wasian (German/Korean), ADHD, autistic, space station engineer

transid(s) ;; transSpiritual, transExplorer, stardustAmian, vanillaScentian

kink/fetish/para(s) ;; autoapagophilia, autocordophilia, automerinthophilia, astrophilia

══════════════════

name(s) ;; wilford, william, barnum

pronouns ;; he/him, xe/xem, love/loves, dance/dances, regret/regrets, death/deaths

age ;; agenull

species ;; animatronic (transHuman)

gender(s) ;; pangender

orientation(s) ;; demisexual, panromantic

role(s) ;; depression holder

source ;; the warfstache automated interview automaton

sign-off(s) ;; – 🤖🍭

══════════════════

hex code ;; #72124f (disco) [i kid you not, that's the colour name. it feels like fate.]

personality ;; jumpy and quiet. love's got a rich inner life, but doesn't talk much. he's melancholic and dramatic.

bonus info ;; n/a

══════════════════

likes ;; animatronics, puppets, cotton candy, talk shows, reality tv

dislikes ;; bullying, cheating, alcohol

possible front triggers ;; five nights at freddys

══════════════════

cisid(s) ;; MDD (major depressive disorder), autistic, colonel, robot

transid(s) ;; transSpecies (transHuman), transDPDR, transCaneUser, transGlitchedVoice, transCannibal

kink/fetish/para(s) ;; biophilia, serviphilia

[itisbop]

I'm gonna say this now as to not start any shit later in the future.

People of the community if you ship Schmitty x [REDACTED] and or Binjpipe x Cookie I'm gonna kindly ask you to not interact with this account.

I do NOT like these ships and they do NOT make me comfortable AT ALL.

That is all, thank you!

[majestydeerakuma]

First of all, tell me, what is the idea of your AU? The plot and how it differs from the original ydkj

Here it goes :D

(WARNING: A SHIT TON OF TEXT)

All of the hosts are types of monsters (that I made up entirely), a friend helped out with some ideas

While yes, they host YDKJ like normal, they have all been through some sort of mistreatment in their lives by humans and have decided to make victims out of humans (except Bob, Bob has forgiven what humans have done to him)

The hosts torture and murder humans as a form of vengeance and in some cases, just the hosts being sadistic

Well, more specifically, Schmitty and Cookie kill humans (Schmitty eats them, Cookie flat out kills them and takes their brains as trophies...he has them all labeled too)

Guy drains energy (and can smell it) from others, Buzz causes audio hallucinations and Nate attracts attention and loves the attention (Bob is capable of predicting the future)

All of the hosts abilities are based on the senses (Schmitty = taste, Nate = sight, Buzz = hear, Guy = smell, Cookie = touch, Bob = sixth sense)

Helen watches them closely and has threatened to take them to the MONSTER ASYLUM if they don't behave themselves

The MONSTER ASYLUM is a place where monsters are supposed to be reformed (even though it's corrupt and the doctors run experiments on them and try to turn them into humans)

I plan on writing short stories on them, some will be silly stories while others will be angsty

But yeah, the overall plot is that: The hosts are monsters and host YDKJ but they hunt, torture and kill humans who play their game in secret, they are avoiding capture from the Monster Patrol so they aren't taken to the MONSTER ASYLUM

(Also, bonus info, Redacted in this AU is part of the Monster Patrol and kills monsters)

I apologize for rambling so much but I wanted to make sure I covered the main bases to explain what the main plot point is aside from me writing random silly and angsty stories for it

[villainkinconfessions]

I don’t regret kidnapping my idol/crush/future husband

Schmitty looked great in his bell hop outfit anywas ☺️

I regret hurting him so much yes but kidnapping him in general? 0 regrets

- [REDACTED] , host of Trivia Murder Party

.

[coloredscribbli]

“It’s been years already! Let things go, you… you fool.”

SOME THINGS WENT WACKY AND NOW I’M MAKING UNOFFICIAL JACKBOX LORE: MASTER MENTALIST EDITION

- MM is from a family with a sort of shadowy skin trait, which makes him appear the way he does. He’s not PROUD of it, but he doesn’t hate it either

- Wound up a student of magic to properly hone his future ventures into hypnotism and such, and his proper studies closed out just around the Murder Hotel incident

- Now, MM was able to figure this out due to general word of mouth about his cousin and naturally grew extremely concerned for him to the point of developing some pretty severe insomnia to stay up and figure out any way to help that he could

- Though Schmitty was eventually able to escape in some way (since Quiplash 3 exists), his cousin remains a horrible mess of anxiety and insomnia due to one pressing worry: is there any way for that ‘Quizkiller’ to know of his efforts to try and bring him down?

- Alas, this caused him to basically fade out of public sight and even refer to himself as ‘Master Mentalist’ to avoid his long term identity from being compromised

- This trait of his carried forth into Hypnotorious, but he still lets his anxiety run loose sometimes - since if he has a feeling someone may be related to that ‘Quizkiller’, they’ll leave with a… little less memory than when they entered (Not a full wipe! He just takes away their memory of HIM in particular)

- This cycle tends to keep repeating in an attempt for Master Mentalist to try and protect himself in the long term. So he’s not a TOTAL bad guy… surely?

[magicalincorrectrobodokiquotes]

"Triple Chaos" Clip

“In fact, mister Cookie MALFEASANCE Masterson-”

Cookie just put a finger on Guy’s mouth. 

“What the fuck?” Kandi asked Cookie. “The fuck got into him?”

“No spoilers, related to the surprise.” “Surprise my ass, that alarm prank was too far.” Schmitty grumbled.

“How many?” Booloo asked.

“5 alarms. One every hour from 7-11 and then one for 11:45.” Schmitty explained.

“JESUS!” Booloo gasped. 

Then paused.

“I told ya Guy could wake up like I can, but you didn’t listen! Serves ya right!” 

“Yeah…” Buzz was trying to drown the BS out by doing a paradiddle. “Right, left, right, right…”

“You drum too? NICE!” Booloo geeked. “Any updates from my future self?” “Not yet.” Kandi checked again. “Think there’s some leftover shortcake in the fridge-” “SAY NO MORE!” Booloo summoned her wings in excitement.

“THAT’S my girl!” Kandi cheered.

“I BLOODY LOVE YOU!” Booloo geeked.

Nate chuckled a little. “Having fun, cuz?”

“Left, right, left, left, right, right, left, right, right, left, right, left, left…” Buzz continued. “Yeah.”

Honey, Arianna and Ginger were chasing each other around the living room wildly while Glitch and Logan supervised. “WOAH!” Logan laughed.

“Slow down, you guys!” Cookie groaned.

Guy sighed. “If I wasn’t so dumb, I’d say so many words to berate you, Cookie!”

“If you want, I can get you a thesaurus.” Cookie offered.

“That’s not the compliment you think it is, Cookie.” Schmitty gently told him.

“Then what is, Schmoopie?”

“I’m sorry for doing the alarm prank, maybe?” Schmitty deadpanned. “Just a thought.”

“I’m…sorry about the alarm prank.” Cookie awkwardly looked away, hands in his pockets.

Guy just huffed at the two.

“I deserve that.”

(pic coming soon)

[captainfightingflower]

Well since there’s talk about songs that fit Jackbox hosts/characters (at least from what i can find), i decided i want to sort of pseudo-share the songs i picked for some characters, yet without spoiling WHAT the songs are just yet!

This is how the post is going to go: Over to the left will be the hosts/characters/group i picked songs for, next to them will be the amount of songs i came up with them, as well as what game they specifically represent (if applicable).

I’ll also be specifying what songs in my list other people have ALSO compared to these characters, and whether or not i got the idea from another person (and who if also applicable). As well as slowly revealing the songs as soon as i myself make something combining the character and the song.

It’ll be like a fun little game, each character will be presented chronologically, with their oldest game appearing first and will be listed by who appeared first if two characters share a game in this list. Click “Keep Reading” if you’re interested in checking out my anonymous picks.

Jackbox Games: 1 song.

Mick/Jackhead: 1 song.

You Don’t Know Jack Series: 2 songs. Both remixes, one slowed.

Cookie Masterson: 9 songs. (2 YDKJ: Vol 1 [one used once], 2 YDKJ: Movies, 1 Fibbage 3, 4 YDKJ: FS). One daycore.

Nate Shapiro: 3 songs (1 YDKJ: Vol.1, 1 YDKJ: The Ride, 1 YDKJ:FS {TAKEN FROM UNKNOWN}). One cover.

Bob (HeadRush): 1 song. Slowed.

N/A (Word Spud): 1 song. Remix.

The Captain (YDKJ:TLG): 1 song.

Josh “Schmitty” Schmitstinstien: 4 songs. (2 Lie Swatter, 1 TMP 2, 1 Quiplash 3).

Octoputtz (Word Puttz): 2 songs.

Bidiots: 1 song. Used once.

Trivia Murder Party Series: 1 song.

Greed (TMP): 1 song.

Gluttony (TMP): 1 song.

Lust (TMP): 1 song.

[REDACTED]: 9 songs. (6 TMP [one used once], 3 TMP 2). One slowed & daycore, one featuring The Lovers (TMP 2) and two duets with The Darkness (TMP & TMP 2).

The Darkness (TMP): 1 song.

Serial Killer (MSM): 1 song.

Two Faced Creep (MSM): 1 song.

Werewolf (MSM): 1 song.

Zombie (MSM): 1 song.

Creepy Voice (YDKJ:FS): 6 songs [one used once]. {ONE TAKEN FROM @gloomyprincecos [used twice]}. One a duet with Elevator Lady (YDKJ: The Ride).

Toby & Lena (Patently Stupid): 1 song.

The Believer (TMP 2): 1 song.

The Sheriff (TMP 2): 1 song.

The Lovers (TMP 2): 1 song.

The Wheel of Enormous Proportions (TWOEP): 4 songs.

Masterson, C. (TJPP9): 1 song.

More can be added (or even removed), so i’m keeping these songs anonymous to reduce potential stress off of my shoulders. But, lest i forget about this post all together: you can expect to see at least a couple songs here get revealed once i do, in fact, do something with the song & character in question and post it publicly.

Strange? Yes, but i’d rather this post look strange than to stress myself out or to accidentally make false promises regarding content regarding a song & a character/group of characters (or embarrass myself if i end up going back on a character-song combo in the future).

[toastful]

An Introduction

*looks around as I enter this hell site*

Hmph, I guess this will do.

Hello, I am Toastful aka Greg Schmitty. I don’t believe in social media as I find it a cesspit of unoriginality and pool lovers. These places are where creativity goes to die. Where grown men get in front of a camera, dancing to Taylor Swift and George Micheal. “Twerkin” their “boy pussies” and “throwing” that “ass” in a “circle”. How crude and barbaric. I am I firm believer that such activities should only be performed in private in front of friends and loved ones. Not on the internet for all to see!! Men have truly lost all self worth and dignity over the past 50 years. It’s truly a shame.

Then the question is, why am I here if I loath social media so much? Well to put it bluntly, I am here to add some life and culture to a hell site that obviously needs it. I’m here to set things straight. Metaphorically of course. Another reason I have picked this platform is because there are a large amount of the gays here. Frankly, I feel safe around the gays. I am not one myself, am a fierce ally, but I respect the culture. I’ve kissed my fair share of boys in my day, but I would not consider myself a boy kisser. I respect boy kissers, but I am not one myself, despite previous experience.

Also the website I use to post my writings on got shut down and sold to The Church of Scientology. I don’t believe in organized religions or anyone who associates with Tom Cruise. The bastard. They deleted all my writings since I wouldn’t join their little club and I didn’t back any of it up since I dont believe in going backwards. Only forwards. So much of my work is lost to time. A shame. But alas, we must persist.

I will be posting my writings here for now on. Since this site seems to be the most detached from the degeneracy of the modern web.

Q and A

Who am I?

Greg Schmitty

I live in Hershey Pennsylvania

I hate chocolate with a passion

The day Hershey Park bursts into flames will be the happiest day of my life

How old am I?

35 years old, proud millennial

What is this blog about?

This is a place where I will post my writings and musings on the world

I write mostly poetry about my life, my experiences, my struggles

I’m in the works of writing a novel loosely based on true events from my life

I will also be ranting about people and places and institutions that make my blood boil. Things that rightfully deserved to be called out by someone of my stature and girth

Why are you here?

To bring life and culture back to the Tumble ecosystem

To change the world with my prose

Who’s your biggest inspiration?

Franz Kafka

I too was a bug once

Who’s your biggest enemy

George Micheal

What are some things you like?

Literature

Poetry

Philosophy

Classic novels

Obscure works

Pondering the folly of man

Indie coffee shops with toilets that you need a key to unlock

Chocolated laxative pieces

2 ply toilet paper

Exposed knee caps

Turtle neck sweaters

Mullets

Birkenstock’s

What are some things you loathe?

Stupid people

Anti-intellectualism

Modern day music

Starbucks

Swimming pools

Public toilets

Small dogs

Large cats

Medium sized bears

Taylor Swift’s music

Cucumbers

George Micheal

Books popular on TikTok or “bOoKtOk”

Social media

Mainstream media

Emojis

Sports

Randy

Organized religion

Large bodies of water

Bug spray

George Micheal

Iced coffee

Jeggings

That’s all for now. Expect more posts in the future. Follow me for culture. My asks box is open. Ask me anything. I have nothing to hide.

Goodbye for now

*disappears mysteriously into a puff of smoke*

[beepsparks]

Okay kinda serious post here but I think I finally lost my special interest in Padlock and DHMIS. I still enjoy content of it (especially Tony) and I get happy seeing such but it hasn’t been hitting as hard as it used to since January when I discovered the Clock Tower in Epic Mickey. Ever since I found that guy I’ve been giving him more attention art-wise (and tbh in GENERAL) than Tony and now with the introduction of my Jackbox fixation I think the special interest for Padlock has finally ended. I hope anyone who follows me for dhmis or padlock content doesn’t mind, I can still get brained with it yeah but it’s pretty rare right now.

I kinda don’t know how to cope and I know thats a fact because despite wanting to change some stuff to be more themed around Clockenspiel and Schmitty I keep refusing to because I wanna hold onto Tony, for anyone curious though NO the clock interest has not died in the slightest, the interest in clocks has managed to live on its own without Tony hence the its a small world fixation.

But uh yeah. After 4, almost 5 years, I believe Tony has finally passed the autism-comfort-character baton to Clockenspiel and Schmitty. Congratulations guys, may the future possible special interests in It’s a Small World (cant say epic mickey tbh I am mainly focused on The Clock Tower when it comes to Epic Mickey sorry + I am heavily fixated on its a small world instead) and Jackbox thrive well.

[wrongydkjquotes]

Watching a Movie

Schmitty: Why is everybody in the future so ripped?

Cookie: Fighting an evil dictator will do that to you.

(Source: Kim Possible, "A Sitch in Time")