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Christmas in July: Who says we can't combine some yuletide cheer with bikini season?

-Nate Shapiro, already in a sexy bikini

(Source: Christmas in July trope description)

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"(pointing at a Father Christmas shirt) It's October. (pointing at an M&M's advent calendar) It's October. (pointing at some Peppa Pig books) IT'S HELL. (pointing at some Christmas crockery) It's October. (pointing at a box of Cadbury's Festive Friends biscuits) It's October. (pointing at some Thomas the Tank Engine squishable toys) Do you want a squishy Fat Controller? (pointing at an array of Christmas puddings) It's October. (pointing at a copy of Resident Evil on his shelf) It's Octo-AH! That's better! Can we at least get Halloween out of the way before shoving Christmas down our throats, planet Earth?"

—Buzz Lippman

(Source: Caddicarus, Resident Evil review)

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schmitty realizes he shouldn't have gotten the angel involved with cookies therapy

(Source: Bug Martini)

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reposting this here cause it fits and it’s cute 🥰

Cookie: What is this feeling, so sudden and new- Schmitty: -I felt, the moment I laid eyes on you? Cookie: My pulse is rushing! Schmitty: My head is reeling! Cookie: My face is flushing! Both: What is this feeling?!

Source: Wicked

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Nate, realizing something

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“True Meaning of Christmas: It's better to give than to receive, so give me a hundred dollars.”

-cookie

(Source: tv tropes)

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Guy Towers, googling

Ohhhh

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*Frosty the Snowman is cut off short*

Cookie: Damn, I just landed on the N.L…

(Source: Mike and Mary in the Morning/Star 92.9)

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“Sexy Santa Dress: Because this time of year is no reason to forget the fanservice!”

-Nate Shapiro

(Source: TV tropes)

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Young Nate: Do you think there's an evil Santa?

Young Guy: An evil Santa??

Young Buzz: Yeah, like Santa's deranged twin brother, or something! He'd make toys for all the bad girls and boys! Evil Santa would give all the dangerous, annoying, and corrupting toys your parents won't allow!

Young Guy: And if you're good?

Young Nate, bitter: He punishes you with shirts and underwear.

(Source: Calvin and Hobbes)

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Buzz: Don't you like it? Cookie: I haven't played with dolls since I was eight. (Source: Game of Thrones, "Lord Snow")

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"I think you should do a play on what Christmas is really about: how Santa died for our gifts, and rose from the dead, and moved to the North Pole. And because of that, every year Santa comes down to forgive us for our sins and gift us eternal presents." — Nate, snarking

(Source: Jazmine, The Boondocks)

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Schmitty: Cookie, the cops are coming! Let's go! Cookie: We're just leaving like this? What about not wanting to ruin Christmas? Schmitty: It's already ruined! This was one house! We've been here for an hour and a half! An hour and a—First of all, we're not even Santa anymore, this has been a home invasion. But an hour and a half, Cookie! It's gonna be light in six hours and we have to deliver to the whole rest of the world! There's two apartment buildings on this block alone! Cookie: No wonder Santa lost his mind! This is ridiculous! We can't do this! Schmitty: Nobody can! It's inhuman! (Source: Family Guy, "Road to the North Pole")

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Cookie: Why don't I get to wake up?!? SCROOGE got to wake up between ghosts! Schmitty, snarking: Scrooge didn't eat one of Nate's brownies. (Source: WKRP in Cincinnati)

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POV: Helen's pissed

Helen: It was a present, and it wasn't supposed to be opened till Christmas Day. Honestly, who opens their Christmas presents early?

(Guy stares at her)

Okay. Shut up. Everyone.

(Source: The Doctor, The Widow and the Wardrobe, Doctor Who Matt Smith Era)

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Cookie: Open ours next. Guy: Now that you're a couple, we don't get two presents from you guys? Schmitty: For my last birthday you gave me a hug. (Source: Friends, "The One Where They All Turn Thirty")

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Buzz Lippman: "To Me, From Me. Because I've earned this." (Source: Item description for the "Present to Myself", Labyrinth of Refrain: Coven of Dusk)