#further maths is the real challenge
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guplia · 4 days ago
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I hate A levels.
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honeytonedhottie · 6 months ago
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beauty and brains⋆.ೃ࿔*:・🎀☕️
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in this post we'll talk about how to implement continual learning into ur life and how to nurture ur intellect and ur beauty, like elle woods for example…💬🎀
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MINDSET ;
first off lets take a look at ur mindset. you need to be willing to learn and if ur stubborn then ur not gonna allow urself to learn and become smarter so for that reason mindset is the perfect place to start when ur starting ur beauty and brains journey.
perspective is EVERYTHING when it comes to learning. if u have the belief that "i hate math so much, im so not good at it etc etc" you're already setting urself up for failure. remember that we are in charge of our own learning.
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figure out the sources of ur limiting beliefs about urself and challenge them. ask urself "why do i think im bad at math (or any other subject)" and the answers that u give urself, CHALLENGE them.
UNDERSTAND THAT ;
before we go any further understand that no subject is too complicated to learn and if ur experiencing that then ur learning it the wrong way…💬🎀
if ur having a hard time understanding a subject in school because of the way ur teacher explains it, ask another teacher at ur school and if that doesn't work turn to online resources OR just ask chat gpt. i ask chat gpt to help me break down math problems and explain how to do them and it works rly good for me.
READING ;
from my own experience i feel like reading is so so important. bcuz reading helps u to expand ur vocabulary and improves comprehension and so much more. personally i love to read so this isnt hard for me to do but if u originally dont like to read here are some ways to romanticize reading.
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♡ start with topics/genres that u love
♡ set small goals (like reading for 5-10 minutes a day) and then building upon those goals
♡ experiment with physical books, e-books etc to figure out what u like best
WHAT U WATCH ;
i watch a lot of discussion based youtube videos, and video essays, documentaries etc and i have learned so much from them and they're actually one of my favorite ways to learn things. so i highly recommend watching some. watching things like this is so important because they provide a deeper understanding of real-world issues, cultures, and events that we might not encounter in our daily lives.
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HOW TO UNDERSTAND ;
understanding what u read and what u learn is so so important. the way i make sure that i understand what im learning is through writing papers. writing papers about things that interest me or things that i learn has helped me to retain what i learn instead of forgetting it all.
another key thing to remember is PRACTICE. if u dont practice what u learn you'll literally forget it. use everything that u learn and if u can't physically use it, imagine urself using it.
MAKE IT A GAME ;
this is where the beauty aspect of the phrase "beauty and brains" comes into play. make learning like a GAME. i think thats how u get smart the best. just implement it into ur daily life.
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for example if u have a habit of watching an episode of ur favorite show a day (or multiple) between episodes read for x amount of time. if u go for a run everyday listen to an audio book whilst running. think of that scene in the movie legally blonde where elle was reading her textbook while working out.
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wonderlandwalker · 11 months ago
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First Impressions | Eddie Munson x Reader
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Stranger Things Masterlist / Inbox Summary: Eddie learns that Dustin has a recently reunited sister, and from the moment he meets you he's a goner. (read part 2 here) Content Warnings / Tags: Pure fluff, henderson!reader, tiny mention of a fight but nothing descriptive, not edited, no use of y/n Word Count: 1.4k A/N: Eddie brain rot cause I couldn't keep it in. Don't know if this is my best work but I'm planning to write more chapters on this so it's just a start, hope you like it
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“You need a ride home after this?” It was more of a formality than an actual question, he always drove Dustin home after a session.
“Oh that’s okay, my sister is picking me up.” Dustin didn’t even look up from packing his things away, but Eddie’s head shot up.
“Your- you have a sister, since when?” As far as he knew Dustin was an only child, but now he was wrecking his brain trying to think if he had ever mentioned you before.
“I know you’re bad at math Eddie, but I just told you she’s driving so try and put the pieces together.” Dustin was looking up at him now, challenging him.
“Alright smartass, it’s time for you to shut up.” He told him as he ruffled through his hair, leaving behind an agitated Dustin trying frantically to fix it. 
The others had already gone home, but Dustin stayed behind late to help Eddie finish up, a habit that became more and more common as the two grew closer. When they finished packing up Eddie locked the door behind them, and while walking to the parking lot decided he wasn’t quite done interrogating Dustin.
“If you have an older sister, how come I've never seen her around before?”
“I mean she’s been around during holidays before, she lived with dad though but they had a big fight so she’s moved here.” It seemed like a sore topic, so Eddie dropped it for now.
As they got to the entrance of the school and felt the cool air on their skin Eddie indeed noticed another car in the usually empty lot, and you were sitting on the hood of it, a book in your hands as you patiently waited. The last rays of sunshine graced your figure as if the heavens themselves were blessing you, and Eddie had never been so sure he’d seena goddess in his life. It was just like the tales he knew so well, the ones he still devoted his life to, it was as if they were becoming true. You looked up when you heard them approach, smiling at the sight of them and giving Dustin a quick side hug as they reached you.
“It’s nice to meet you, I’ve heard a lot of good things.” You held your hand out for Eddie to take, but all he could do was look at it, staring ahead as if hitting pause in a game, he stood still. He wanted to react, to not make the most horrible first impression possible, but the longer he looked at you the worse it got, getting lost in sight of your smile.
“Alright, not a fan of handshakes, noted.” You chuckled as you withdrew your hand, and Eddie cursed himself for not having taken the opportunity to feel how soft your skin must’ve been. You looked at him again, your eyes piercing straight through his soul and he wondered if maybe he had found himself in one of his fantasy worlds, he must have. But the next second he shook himself out of it, because you were real, you were real and in front of him and expecting him to say something.
“I’m Eddie.” he said, nodding his head as if to confirm his own statement.
“So I’ve been told.” Another giggle slipped past your lips, and Eddie wasnt sure if it was from nerves or entertainment, but he was dying to hear more of it, even if he had to make a fool of himself to do so.
Dustins head kept going back and forth as if watching a tennis match of idiocracy. He had never seen Eddie so flustered, so used to the man flaunting with every opportunity that presented itself that this seemed quite out of character. In full disclosure, it was kind of freaking him out to see Eddie so beside himself, and it was freaking him out even further that he couldn’t figure out why. It was probably blatantly obvious to anyone else, but maybe it was for the best that Dustin couldn’t place where the tension originated from, either way, his patience had run out
“Can we go home now, I still have to call Mike to discuss our net strategies” You tore your eyes from Eddie, deciding that maybe it was for the best to head home.
“Yeah alright, maybe I’ll see you around Eddie.” You gave him one last smile as you got in the car with Dustin and drove off, but it took him another minute to pick his shambled ego up from the concrete ground as he berated himself for not being able to utter one coherent sentence. As he got in his van and drove home as well he decided he’d have to grill Dustin for more information on you the next time he’d see him. As he got to the trailer he grumbled a hello to Wayne before disappearing to his room, ignoring the backhanded comment he got about his grumpy disposition. 
He wondered if he’d ever be able to convince you he was cool, whether he’d be able to get you to agree to see him again, but after what just transpired he figured the odds were slim. Not that he’d give up so easily, he didn’t have much of a reputation to lose and if he’d be able to get you to laugh again that would be more than enough. But he didn’t get to wonder for long as Wayne knocked on his door, he was ready to tell the man to leave him alone, but the next sentence was one that confused him immensely
“Someone on the phone for you.” Wayne held the phone out to him, expecting him to get up from the bed and take it, but Eddie didn’t move an inch.
“For me, you sure?” He was still not quite sure what to do.
“Unless another Eddie is living here I’m pretty sure.” He moved his hand again to accentuate the phone that was still on hold, but once again Eddie just sat there.
“If you want I can tell her to call back-” That’s when he sprung into action, snatching the phoen out of Wayne’s hand 
“No! No, I got it. Thank you.” The old man simply chuckled as he left again, closing the door behind him to give his nephew some privacy.
Eddie cleared his throat once before picking up the line put on hold. 
“Hello?” he asked, still not quite sure what to do.
“Hi, Eddie it’s me, just wanted to see if you were doing alright.” your sweet voice blessed his ears once more. He doesn’t know what he did to get the universe on his side like this, but he was grateful for it nonetheless.
“Yeah I’m good, listen-” Eddie figured this time he shouldn’t waste his chance, and he probably had some making up to do.
“- I’m sorry if I freaked you out earlier, just never seen anyone that pretty before.” You were giggling again, and it brought the biggest grin onto his face.
“You didn’t weird me out at all, it was kinda cute. I had to bribe Dustin to let me use the phone so I don’t have much time but I was wondering if maybe you’d like to go out this weekend?” Maybe he should’ve waited a beart before answering, but he was too eager to care.
“Go out, as in a date?” It got him blushing, the red creeping up on his cheeks as he wondered if that’s really what you were asking
“I mean, kinda, if you want to.” He could almost see you blushing on the other side of the line as well, and he decided it was now or never.
“I’d love to.” 
“That’s great, I’m still kind of new around here, do you know any good places?” Your smile was present as you spoke, and he was already looking forward to seeing it again, now knowing he wouldn’t have to wait long.
“How about I come and pick you up, we can go to the mall.” His confidence was growing with the minute now, absolutely elated by the turn of events.
“Im looking forward to it” He wondered what you’d wear, knowing whatever it was it would look beautiful on you, and he knew he’d spend the entire date amazed at your presence. 
“Me too” he said before the both of you hung up the phone, he had already started planning the most amazing evening out, and maybe, he thought, maybe this year really would take a turn for the better.
[part 2 here]
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imnotjaesblog · 1 year ago
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Part 3: The Gamer
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Quick Summary: Haechan is an arrogant gamer. He's won many challenges regarding his online persona however there seems to be one thing in his real life he just can't seem to beat. One day while he plays online looking for someone to chat with he comes across a female character who sparks his interest. She's extremely good at the game and seems to know all his moves before he does. Out of curiosity, he turned his mic on to speak to her, inviting her to a room. She accepts his request and when they play alone together he instantly recognizes her sweet voice. And finally is able to over come that challenge, only to realize new ones arise.
Warnings: Smut lots of it. Cybersex, Physical intercourse, Oral sex (F.m receiving) Fingering, Degarding, Haechan gets smacked in the face but likes it, Haechan is also pussy whipped and Cursing.
Words: 9k
I did not mean to write so much I just got carried away.
MINORS DO NOT READ OR INTERACT!
Enjoy :)
Lee Haechan was not on the top of your list of types of men you wanted to date. You imagined yourself with someone who was physically taller than you, attractive, and humorous. You pictured someone who saw you as their equal and not their success to be placed among the trophies on their wall. You knew what this life had in store for you, your physical attributes being both a blessing and a curse. You wanted to change that for yourself.
So you parked your Mercedes just outside PCBangs where Haechan currently sat skipping his late-night math class. Like many just beyond those doors sat a bunch of gamers addicted to the sound of their fingers typing on the keyboard. Haechan sat amongst those same gamers fingers pressing into his keys and clicking his mouse eager to win whatever online game he was playing.
Stepping out of you're car you stepped towards the small building. You eyed it up and down scoffing. You have never been to this place like this before. You've driven past this specific place so many times, but you've never stepped inside. You pulled out the folded piece of paper from your pocket reading the name of the place under Haechan's name where Jisung wrote it.
Looking back up and seeing the name matched the place you folded the paper back, placed it in your purse, and stepped inside PCBangs.
You looked around noting the place was much bigger in the inside than the out. Rows and rows of people sitting in small cubicles. Face illuminated by computer screens. You walked further inside looking for Jisung who worked here, serving food and drinks to people.
You found him just behind the counter on his phone. Assuming he was just waiting for someone to place an order you walked over to him. "Hey," you said catching his attention. He nearly dropped his phone. Clearing his throat he sent you a shy wave. "Hey. I didn't know you were coming over here," He said surprised you spoke to him. You usually avoided talking to him in public to avoid questions. You figured in this dark room with everyone's eyes glued to a screen you had a chance to speak to him, besides it would only be brief. He's not what you are here for.
You shrugged placing your purse on the table and pulling out the list. Without saying his name you pointed to it. Jisung nodded handing you a pink juice. "He ordered this about two minutes ago. You can bring it to him," he said. You nodded with a cheeky smile. You folded the list away placing it back in your bag.
"You know what?" you asked looking at the drink and then Jisung. He wasn't following you at all. "I got a better idea," you said sipping his drink.
Walking past a few people you avoided their eyes, keeping your sunglasses on. Once you reached Haechan you tapped him. He only turned for a second jerking his head to the right. "You can leave it there. Thank you," he said. You assumed he believed you were a waitress. You chuckled placing the drink down. Staying behind him you slid your arms around his frame taking your sunglasses off and placing them over his eyes.
Confused he took them off turning around only to be met with your eyes. His chair spun his body sat in the chair meeting yours. You let your arms fall back into place. Hand holding your shoulder bag tightly a grin on your pink glosses lips. You stood before him. His confusion instantly morphed into joy. Putting your frames back on and leaning up to kiss you. With a smile on your lips, you turned your head, and he placed a kiss on your cool cheek.
"I didn't know you came here. Let alone play video games," he said in the form of a question. You shrugged taking off your bag and placing it on the small desk where the computer sat. He followed your eyes like a lost puppy waiting for you to respond to him.
"Only recently," you said in response a teasing undertone when you spoke. He didn't question any further. You grabbed onto the arm of his chair pulling him from his game. He smirked seeing you turn him away from the desk making room for you to step inside the small space.
You step inside your arms pulling his chair closer to you as you squatted sitting on his lip. He felt his throat tighten, his lips becoming dry. He licked them repeatedly as you sat down clearing his throat. He tried to control himself. He couldn't lose his mind right now, not here. The feeling, the underlying fantasy to push his hips up, pressing his semi-hard-clothed dick into your ass was building inside him. You shifted around swinging your legs so they'd be under the desk. He thought right then and there he'd lose all sense.
"Are you okay?" you asked shifting again just to hear his small reactions. His breath hitched and small noises left his plushed lips inches away from your ears. It was nothing but music to you. You were getting exactly what he needed. He let out another groan. He tried to cover it with the fact his character got shot in the game. The boy next to him with half a headset on looked over concerned. Haechan looked over at him hearing the boy's chair creak as he tried to take a peek at what was going on.
Haechan gave the boy a weird, awkward smile. The other boy raised his brow completely lost. "I've been at this all day. I've just been losing," he excused. The boy just nodded slowly and was slightly uncomfortable. He turned away fully placing his headset on his ears.
"How does this game work?" you asked a mischievous smile on your lips, a moan escaping past them. You let your hands ghost over him. Hovering over his right hand, he clicked slowly on his mouse, trying to regain focus. You leaned forward placing your elbow on the desk and chin in your hand.
You pushed your ass back further onto him planting itself right on top of his dick. He blinked a couple of times, unsure what to do with his free hand. He didn't know if you were pushing up on him on purpose, but what he did know was it felt good, too good. He was afraid he'd cum in his pants. He placed a hand on your hip trying his best to adjust you, but he couldn't deny how good the pressure felt.
He leaned close to your ear lips barely touching your skin. You could feel the faint of his warm breath tickling your skin sending a shudder down your neck. He smirked enjoying the feeling of you so close to him. Being this close to you he could smell your perfume. It fogged up his senses slowly turning him into a madman. Becoming addicted to being this close, being able to smell and taste you. He placed a small wet peck just under your ear on the back of your warm neck.
"I know what you're doing," he whispers laced with lust. The hand on his keyboard finds itself comfortably on your hips. He gave your waist a gentle squeeze. You could hear the grin on his lips the more he felt you apply pressure to his cock.
"Fuck baby your being such a bad girl, Rubbing your ass on my cock in front of all these people? You just want all these horny little boys to see you get off on my cock, huh?" he said surprising you for a moment. You moaned low letting your head fall back on his shoulder. He scoffed help you fix your body. The other hand that was on his mouse's left, bringing itself down your neck. Sliding down the rest of your body, however, he stopped at the button of your pants.
You moved back a little, letting your ass rest just on his pelvis. Your clothed clit rubbed against his clothed dick, searching for any kind of friction. He groaned deeply into your ear, eyes fluttering shut for a brief moment then opening again. Haechan having enough of your behavior stilled your hips.
You chuckled listening closely as you heard Haechan slowly start to fall apart. He was trying to control you, he'd probably try and make you get on your knees under his desk and suck him off then maybe if your good he'll reward you. God knows he was imagining it, maybe he should tell you more of his dirty little thoughts revolving around you.
While this sounded delicious, you had overheard a story about the pretty boy once. At one of Jaehyun's many parties. You recall being in someone's bedroom playing truth or dare. One of the girl's truths was to tell her most embarrassing hook-up story. You didn't know the girl very well but you know an unsatisfied girl when you see one.
She said how "Haechan loves to claim he's a dom," making all the girls giggle and gush in that random boy's bedroom. Based on the alcohol smell it was most likely Yuta's. You looked around his bedroom not paying much attention to the story, but you did remember one, now important part of the story.
" He claimed he loves "being in charge" and "taking control," she said sarcastically. One of the girls had scoffed, "So what? You're saying he's a pussy?" she asked causing some of the other girls to laugh. She shook her head lips pursed. "Nope," she responded. The girl across from her straightens up now interested in the story. "Then what is she?" she asked eager to hear more. You continued looking around the room picking up a basketball trophy barrier under some tank tops, from a few years back.
"Worse, I can deal with pussy though," she joked causing everyone to laugh. You even giggled placing the trophy back. The other girl who asked the original question tapped the girl's arm who you assumed was her friend. She tapped her trying to grab hold of her attention again. "What is it then?" she asked. Once the laughter died down the girl with the long brown hair spoke.
"He lies about fucking girls but the only girls he fucked is online," she said causing some's eyes to widen and other blinked confused. "So what he has a lot of phone sex?" another girl asked. The brown-haired girl nodded her head. "It's easy to pretend to fuck and be a dom when you don't have to see the person and they don't have to see you. The little arrogant prick is a virgin," she said crossing her arms over her chest. She wasn't upset though, she was more annoyed them anything. You all had found out she had found out this news earlier in the night.
That party was only a few weeks ago, no way he lost his actual virginity during that time spent.
Hearing him being so nasty to you now on the phone was perfect. He told you he had only imagined you on his lap while he slid past your pants and pushed his thick fingers into your tight hole fucking your wet pussy so well and soo deep. He currently sat in PCBangs legs spread and hand squeezing his dick underneath his desk with you on the phone. You knew by the sound of his voice he was close to coming so you stopped.
"Haechan," you called through breaths. "Yes?" he asked a sigh escaping his lips.
"Come over, I want you to fuck me for real," you said a breath leaving your lips smirk forming. You heard his cough a couple of times before the phone hung up. You chuckled to yourself sitting up on your bed and walking over to your bathroom not too far from your desk. As you stepped inside you removed your silky pajama set stepping out of your shorts. You placed off to the side fixing up your hair to take a shower.
The shower water is turned on, and you let your hand go past the glass feeling the warmth of the water. You adjusted the heat testing again. You smiled once the water felt just right. You stepped inside the shower closing the glass that covered your naked frame. You hummed letting the warm water touch your skin. You felt the steam calm down your body, the hot water relaxing your muscles. This was always your favorite part of the day. You closed your eyes taking in the warm water wishing this peaceful moment could last forever.
After some time the water ran cold. You sighed opening your eyes annoyed you had to step out. You look down and see the wrinkles in your hand. "I'm pruning," you said jokingly to yourself. You chuckled turning the water off and pulling the glass back. You stepped out on your bath mat drying yourself. You wrap a towel around your body and walk into your bedroom shutting the light off in your bathroom.
You walk over to your walk-in closet. You didn't have to walk too far in, on the left hung your pajama sets. You skimmed through an array of sets. Some blue, green even a couple of pink sets. Your eyes landed on the lilac set. You took it off the track changing into the garment. You checked yourself in your full-length mirror, twirling around and swaying from side to side you hummed satisfied with your look. You left the closet closed the light and walked to your vanity.
You sat down in your white cushion seat pulling out all your lotions and creams. You applied the vanilla-scented lotion to your warm skin. The lights from the mirror illuminate your face. You turned to the mirror applying some creams to your face. Your skin glowed under the light. "This feels so much better," you commented your skin feeling less dry and tight. You smiled clapping your hands together. "Where is my phone?" you asked out loud searching for the piece of technology.
You spotted it on your lamp desk. You walked over picking it up and switching to your camera. You snapped some shots of yourself seeing Jisung's name show up on your screen.
"How did everything with your plan go? You left before I could ask what it was," he asked you leaned over switching off your LED mirror. You stood up pushing in the chair. "It went as well as I expected it to," you said walking over to your room light switch. You flicked it off hearing the sound of your dog plopping on your bed. She walked in circles paws digging into your mattress before she found a comfortable spot to lay.
"Also you never told me Haechan is a virgin. I mean I already knew but it seems like a pretty important piece of information," you commented calling Jisung out on his poor skills in being your spy. He chuckled you could hear the mattress dip from the other side of the phone. He played around with the strings on his hoodie as he listened to your voice. He didn't mind you talking about a whole other boy while on the phone with him. As long as he got to talk to you, that was alright with him.
You sat back on your pillow on your bed pulling your covers back. Hand reaching out to touch your real pillow princess. She snuggled up to your hand. "He is? He told everyone he wasn't," he said genuinely surprised. He sat up on his bed a bit Yangyang turned to him taken back by the boy's reaction. Jisung brushed him off with his hand motioning for him to leave. He rolled his eyes but listened to the younger one closing the door behind him.
You chuckled on the other end. "Even if I didn't hear the story of how he lost his phone virginity I would have known. Man, you are such a dork," you teased hand pulling back from petting your now sleeping dog. The same hand crosses over your chest. Your elbow leaning on your free arm. Jisung frowned but didn't pay much attention to your comment. You usually joked with him that way, kind of like everyone else. At least you knew when to stop the jokes or the appropriate time to make them.
The guys at the house only ever spoke to him when they needed someone to throw jokes at. It used to be Taeyong whom they picked on, but after he moved in along with Jaemin and Haechan it seemed like he was their new punching bag. He shrugged off most of your jokes as just jokes. Unlike his so-called 'friends' whose jokes felt more like insults. He didn't mind when you called him a dork, it came off more as an endearing nickname than a petty insult.
"Whatever," he chuckled a little after your laughter died down. "At least I provide you with good information," he threw back confidently. You nodded pursing your lips. "That you do," you answered unable to deny his skills.
"So tell me who else," you said. Jisung raised a brow getting more comfortable on top of his sheets. "Who else what? Is a virgin?" he asked just making sure he heard you right. "No, I want to know who else has a dog. Of course who else is a virgin!" you said licking your teeth. " I wanna know who else is a liar," you said checking your nails your eyes rolling in annoyance. Jisung sighed thinking about it for a moment.
"Okay from what I know Haechan is a virgin-,"
"Yes, yes we know that already," you said cutting him off annoyed he just wouldn't get to the point. He sighed letting out a sarcastic laugh. "If you cut me off again I won't finish," he said.
"Just go!" you shouted through the phone emphasizing the O. He sighed shaking his head not believing for a second he was having this conversation. "Well Mark, Doyoung, and Taeyong are virgins,-"
"We know that," you said cutting him off again.
"That's it I give up!" he said hearing you whine. "I'm sorry I'll shut up," you promised. He sighed a smile on his lips. He shook his head looking up at his ceiling and then back at the spot on the wall in front of him in his dark room.
"This may come as a surprise but I know for a fact Jeno is a virgin," he said causing your eyes to widen almost throwing yourself off your bed in shock. Next to Jaehyun, Yuta, and Johnny, you would have bet money, confidently Jeno wasn't a virgin. Captain of the hockey team with girls constantly throwing themselves at him and he's never fucked any of them. It just seems too hard to believe.
"No way. How do you even know?" you asked still shocked by this information. Jisung recalled the moment he discovered his friend claimed he 'lost his virginity'. Telling their friend group he lost it to his high school girlfriend when he first joined his high school basketball team. He claims they broke up once he started college and switched to hockey which is why no one had ever seen her or met her. Privately Jisung questioned this and in a future moment he and Jeno brought up the topic again.
"He asked me if I was a virgin. I didn't respond and instead asked him. I think he knew that I knew he was lying and told me the truth. He did have a girlfriend during high school, but once they graduated they split and he went to college a virgin," he said thinking about how he never thought he'd ever share this story.
"Wow," you said through a small gasp. "And you?" you asked. Jisung caught off guard stilled for a moment. He felt his breathing begin to pick up the sweater starting to make him hot and uncomfortable. You waited for his response but it never came. "Jisung?" you called tilting your head unsure as to why he didn't respond. He cleared his throat removing his sweater.
"Yes?" he asked again.
"Are you okay?" You asked. He nodded unsure what to do with his hands. He swallowed hard before he responded trying to cleanse his now dry throat. "If you nodded I can't hear that," You commented noticing he took too long again. "Sorry, I'm fine," he responded through nervous blinks.
"Good. So are you a virgin?" you asked. He went to respond but you received a notification. "I-" he began but was cut off by you. "I'm sorry Haechan is calling me I have to go," you said apologetically. You were genuinely sorry. You discovered after becoming closer to the boy you enjoyed his company. You liked talking with him, he made you feel so normal, so comfortable. You felt like you could tell him. anything and he'd never judge you. I mean how could he? He was helping you ruin the people he called his friends.
"It's fine," he said a mixture of disappointment and relief in his tone. He wanted to keep talking to you. Heck, he could go on for hours just listening to your voice alone. He enjoyed the sound of your voice being his lullaby and sometimes morning call. He assumed you liked talking to him as well. You call him a lot and invite him over, sometimes even letting him stay in your spare room. However, he didn't know where the topic of him not being or being a virgin was going, and that made him nervous. He doesn't want to ruin the relationship you two have, it's truly special to him. You are special to him.
"I'll make it up to you tomorrow," you said wearing a weak smile. Your phone continued to ring as you hung up just as Jisung was saying goodnight.
"Hello," you addressed Haechan. You could hear loud wind coming from the other side of the line. "Hey I'm outside your place," he said arms crossed over his chest. The cool fall air nibbed at the parts of his skin left exposed. He zipped up his sweater to his chin, the cool wind under the night sky nipping at his skin.
You pulled your covers back your fluffy, beige dog picking her head seeing you put on your white slippers. You walked over to your rack picking off your lilac robe. You slid your arms through the holes, tying the fabric that hung around your waist.
The lilac robe with black feathers at the ends and collar kept your body warm as you stepped out to your living room. "Come upstairs. Fedrick knows you are here for me," you said resting on your couch. You let your slippers slide off your feet landing on the white carpet. You turned on your electric fireplace not too far from where you sat, just beyond the coffee table.
"Stay on the phone with me?" he asked walking inside your building. You nodded gleamful eyes watching your fireplace. Your couch was placed a few feet away from your door, perks of having such a large living space. The giant flatscreen mounted on the wall a few inches above the fireplace.
Your kitchen is a few feet behind you, with a dark marble island, and a small bar not too far from the fridge. "Sure. Just let me know when you are here so I can open the door," you responded a teasing undertone in your voice. Haechan let out an airy chuckle. You could hear his heavy boots as he stepped into the elevator.
You heard a scratch from down the hallway that led to a few rooms like the guest room, a bathroom, your office, and your bedroom. You didn't think much of it hearing small clicks on the floor. You heard a plop next to you. You looked over seeing your dog's tail waging back and forth. You smiled petting her head. You heard the elevator ding indicating he was close. He like some others knew where you lived since you were known for having small get-togethers inside your apartment various times throughout the year.
"I'm heading down the hallway now. I should be there soon," He said making his way down the brown velvety hallway. "Haechan can you hurry up? I miss you," you pouted. You smirked once you started to hear his pace pick up. His breathing quicked and footsteps became heavy as he rushed across the beige carpet floor. You looked towards your door. Silence washed over your entire apartment. You saw when two feet stopped in front of your door. The silence still made itself known in the room. You could only hear the small faint breaths of your pet.
Knock Knock
"I'm outside," he said. You hung up standing up from your place on the couch. You walked over to the door fixing up your top, pushing your breast up with your bra. Undoing the knot just slightly so the robe would expose more of your cleavage. You pulled the robe back inches from your shoulder so the bottom would ride up. You smiled satisfied with yourself. Until you realize you have forgotten your perfume. Lucikly you always kept a spare in your-
"What the fuck?" you cursed to yourself searching through your bag. You pulled out your wallet, gum, and lip gloss. You dumped the whole bag next to the table where your keys were placed and found nothing. You let out a sigh in disbelief. Another knock on your door caught your attention. You turned your neck to the door. "Just a minute!" you called turning back to your dissolved purse. You never take that small bottle out of your bag. There's no way you just lost it. You placed everything away wishing no one had stolen it.
Instead, you went to your room quickly running down the glossy wooden hallway. You grabbed the larger bottle from your nightstand spraying it on your wrist, neck, and chest. You twirled around and rubbed it into your skin. Then you placed down running quickly back to the door. You let out a breath as you placed your hand on the knob then, like an actress slowly opened the door.
Haechan stood there hands stuffed in his sweater pockets, jeans touching just slightly past his ankles, and boots on his feet making him a few inches taller than he normally was. His head lifted from his boots that dug into the carpet to meet your frame. He couldn't see the way his eyes scanned your body. Your warm, soft skin is on display for him to see. Your fingers graze over the slit of your silky robe playing with the hem. Haechan sucked in a breath a vibration against his teeth.
Curious eyes wandered your skin imagining sinful thoughts. His mind clouded with lust picturing you above him straddling his waist aligning his thick cock at your entrance and pushing it past your tight hole and into your velvet walls. He wanted to know what sounds you'd make when he thrust upwards into your hole. What sounds would your pussy make when you swallowed him. Would you whimper and moan? Or would you groan chasing after more?
Skin on skin, your sweat dripping down your body and mixing with his creating a mixture of heat. He wanted you to fuck him raw and dirty, pull his hair and grab his neck cutting his airflow.
He felt the strain in his pants the more he thought of you. He mustered up some courage to speak to you, say anything to you. He didn't know what to do with himself in front of such a pretty girl.
"You look nice," He said with a shy smile fiddling his thumbs in his sweater pockets. The sweater brings him comfort in this moment. Taking another glance at you he regretted hanging up earlier. He wanted to hear what you sounded like when you cum. You smiled taking his arm and pulling him inside. "Why don't you take to me like you do in your games," You said guiding him down the hallway with a sway of your hips when you turn the corner to your bedroom. He licked his dry lips simply nodding his head and letting out a breathy, "Okay"
You pushed him onto your bed a mischievous smile on your lips. You raised a finger to him. "One second," you said turning away and walking to your dresser. Haechan watched your every move making sure to not miss a single step in your walk. Haechan's hand traveled from his sweater to the print on his jeans.
You hadn't done much but guide him to your room, touching his hand, he might have also caught a whiff of your addicting perfume. That was enough for him to lose his mind. The dirty boy squeezing himself over his jeans his lip caught between his teeth. He couldn't help it anymore, letting his hand unbutton his jeans and pull out his dick.
The tip angry and red in his fist precum spilling out the tip. His cock is in pain and in need of being touched. He fisted himself slowly at the thought of you on your knees in front of him. Your hand replacing his spreading his creamy juice all over his throbbing dick. The way it would twitch in your hand as you jerked him.
His head was thrown back in pure bliss thanking the Gods for this moment as you placed him flat on your wet tongue. Hearing your saliva mixture with his cum, the squish sounds it would make as you bobbed on his cock so dumb on his shaft. His hand comes up to your head holding your hair in his grip the harder you took him. The moans you make vibrating his dick. It was too much for him he was gonna cum-
"Having fun?" you asked arms crossed over your chest. You had already grabbed what you needed but upon arriving back you saw the perverted boy's legs spread out, mouth open, eyes shut closed with his cock in his hand covered in cum. He panicked adjusting himself and removing his hand from his dick. You had removed the robe left in the silk top nipples peeking from underneath and shorts barely covering your thighs giving Haechan something else to think about.
"I'm sorry," he blabbed eyes glossy and lips tinted red from how hard he bit them. "That's okay my love. Since it's your first time I'll be nice," You said walking over to him. Without a thought, he slowly laid back the closer you got. Your hands find his zipper and pull it down his frame. You took it off his shoulders yanking it down his torso. He watched in awe as you underdressed him listening to every command and order you gave. He pulled his t-shirt over his head watching as you pulled down his jeans and boxers leaving him completely naked in front of you.
"Sit right," you demanded seeing him straighten himself up. Your demands going straight to the head of his dick. Precum leaking through the tip and seeping past the cloth. His hand sliding to his cock again like the perv he is. He squeezed himself the precum shooting up past a small opening by his tummy. Droplets settling on his stomach.
You pouted mocking him standing in between his legs you took the hand that was on his dick and brought it to your clothed pussy. He watched you with wide eyes letting you use his fingers. He groans slipping past his lips once you let his hands explore without your help. Slipping past your shorts and finding your wet folds he groaned cock twitching a gush of cool air hitting his skin making him rut his hips upwards.
"Fuck your so wet," he praised circling his fingers around your clit. His fingers coating in your clear juice. Dancing around and collecting as much of you as he could. You dripped down your thigh, forming a puddle on your sheets. You yanked his hand away. Feeling cocky he brought his fingers to his nose sniffing you. Then he let his glistening fingers slip past his pink lips.
He bit lips head falling back at your scent. Your pussy almost as addictive as your perfume. He hummed at the taste, his digits still past his lips savoring your sweet taste on his tongue.
You pulled a red ribbon out of your short pockets snapping your fingers to get his attention. He opened his eyes quickly finger slipping from his lips. Already drool forming at the corner of his mouth. In a matter of ten minutes, you had made him completely pussy whipped making the rest of the night just too easy. "This is for you," you said placing the ribbon over his eyes. He was confused but let you do your thing. He didn't mind exploring new kinks if it meant he got to fuck you in the end.
"This should help," you whispered to him. "Leave it on," You said sternly. You pulled down your shorts throwing them to the side as well as your top standing naked before him. He whined at your loss a few seconds away from pulling up the ribbon to see where you went. But he listened to you.
Your fingers danced on his thighs, and he shuddered at the sudden contact. "Haechan," You called sitting on your bed, sitting behind him. Your legs wrapped around him. His hands grazed your skin, up and down your thighs. You leaned your head on his shoulder tilting it to the crook of his neck.
"Talk to me baby," You said. It finally clicked in his head what you were doing. You knew he was a virgin, you must have heard the infamous story of him thickening out at Jaehyun's party. All because he wanted to stop the teasing he received from his friends. He had spoken to many of the girls he met online while gaming every night. And with Jisung showing up to the house less and less it made it easier for him to talk to the girls in their room.
He'd talk to them through his headset creating a private room for just the two of them. He didn't want their numbers, or socials he just wanted to cum and go. Until you found him in one of his games. You had Jisung play for you while you spoke to Haechan. He knew your voice the minute you spoke to him and was more than willing to give you his number. That's how he ended up here, he considered himself so lucky. So now to make this moment worth it, he was going to say exactly what he always imagined to you.
"What do you want to do to me? Show me," you whispered to him touches lingering on his skin as you faded away leaning back on your pillows. His ears followed the distance you created. He sucked in his teeth but turned his body to you.
"First I'd touch you here," He said hands reaching your neck and caressing the warm skin. He leaned down closer using his other senses to find you. "Then I'd kiss you," he said pressing his lips onto you. The kiss was passionate and wet. Tongues mixing and exchanging salvia. Your hands tangling in his hair yanking on his locks. Who knew he kissed so well?
He let go catching his breath, chest rising up and down. "Then," he said through his pants, hair starting to fall in front of his face. "I'd touch you," His fingertip dragged down your skin, down the valley of your breast, just past your belly and to your pussy.
“Here," he said gathering all your wetness on his finger and spreading it throughout your folds, coating it on your clit. You couldn't deny the way he was making you feel. The warmth he created throughout your body was incredible and the attention he paid to your clit with his fingers felt heavenly. He was being selfish with you, all because he had something to prove to the world. A virgin can fuck and feed like am an experienced man.
"Then I'd put my tongue here," he said leaning down to your chest. You could feel the strains of his brown locks tickle your skin. He used his head to feel around your skin stopping once he found your left breast. His mouth engulfed your nipple sucking on the hard bud.
You let out a moan going straight to Haechan's ears his cock twitching as it pressed against your inner thigh. You let out a few more moans as he speeded up on your clit. He loved the sounds you made for him only encouraging him to go faster.
Your back arched off your bed mouth falling open as he released from your breast. "Then," he said a smirk on his lips his fingers slowing down making you whimper at the sudden loss. You reached your hand up slapping him across his skin. His head turned to the side red print on his face, but he wasn't mad. The little perv liked it letting out a pleasurable groan dick thrusting forward. "Don't get cocky," You said sternly. He nodded bowing his head wanting to mess up again just so you'd hit him again.
"I'm sorry Mommy I won't get carried away again," He said body moving downwards. He leaned down to your belly. "How about I make it up to you?" he asked pressing wet kisses on your soft skin his hair tickling your tummy. He moved his head to look up at you even though he couldn't see you.
He pictured what you look like right now. Probably sweaty, hair sticking to your forehead and neck. Chest rising up and down. Nipples hard shuddered everything you felt a cool breeze on your skin. The thoughts encouraged him, kissing his way down your body.
He sucked your clit then pulled away. You let out a loud whine making him groan mouth falling open. "Then I'd take you in my mouth and give you everything you deserve. I'd suck you so good Mommy, make you cum so hard," he said sinful acts clouding his judgment. His mouth engulfed your clit tongue flicking the bud quickly. You moaned an earthy moan bringing your hands to his hair gripping tightly on the locks.
“Fuck your doing so well baby,” You praised looking down and seeing his head completely disappear between your thighs. His tongue lapping between your folds. More of your white, creamy juice slipping past your hole onto his thick tongue. The scene made you moan out loud seeing his hips flexing into your mattress fucking your sheets. You allowed him to fuck your sheets seeing him get off was hot.
He brought his finger up your hole feeling the way your juice dripped out of you. He caught the drop on the tip of his finger circling it around your hole then pushing was remaining back inside you curling his fingers upwards. Your back arched using your elbows you tried to pull yourself away but Haechan didn't let you.
Arm wrapping around your frame pushing your stomach down and other fucking into your pussy so well you could cry. He pulled away for a second still fucking you so well and deep with his fingers. "Just wanna be good for you," he pleaded got mouth sucking your clit again. You lifted yourself on your elbows watching the boy completely turn into an animal on your pussy. Your hands pushing his face further into your core. Flexing your hips, humping his tongue the point of his nose meeting your clit.
You felt your whole body vibrate the pleasure becoming to much for you. You tried to push him away again but he didn’t let you. Using his big hand to hold you down pushing your stanch and yanking you forward. You squirmed under his touch feeling his fingers explore places no one have ever reached. Curling up inside you motioning a “come here” with his index and middle as he grazed your happy repeatedly making your mind run wild.
He felt himself on the brink of cumming again once you flexed your hips into his mouth, but he didn't want to cum like this. He wanted to cum once he got to fuck you. Spilling his creamy, thickness into your pussy. So to his shame, he pulled away making you whine after being denied another orgasm tonight.
"Haechan," you whined but he shushed you with his lips. Only finding your mouth when you released faint little breaths. "I haven't fucked you yet Mommy," he said above your lips. His mouth covered in your slick. You turned your head, arm extending to open your dresser to pull out a condom. You sat up opening it up and sliding it on him. He groaned at the feeling of your hands on him.
You sat back spreading your legs and pulling his waist towards you. You aligned him at your entrance helping him slowly push his cock inside you. He felt the groans get stuck in his throat. He had never been inside a woman ever but something about you felt different, so special.
Haechan looked a mess. Fat cock jerking in his hands as he prepared himself to fuck you. Mouth and fingers still shiny with your juice. Precum stains on his thighs. Drool falling from his lips. His hair stuck to his forehead but also different parts pushed back from how hard you pulled on his hair. He looked totally fucked out. He palmed himself slowly aligning himself at your glistening hole.
"Then I'd push my cock into your tight hole," he said letting out a groan as you squeezed around him. He gripped your waist using it as support holding himself straight. The squishing sound he heard when your juice formed at your hole, pushing it back inside you sent him into a frenzy. His head fell hair dangling on his skin. You moaned, him filling you up so deliciously you could cry. He pulled his hips back out and gripped your waist tightly making sure he wouldn't fall.
"Then I'd fuck you so well," he said plunging himself back into you. You let out a loud, earthy moan coming deep from the back of your throat. He was so snug inside you reaching places no one had reached before. Haechan was losing himself above you eyes squeezed shut underneath the red ribbon. His mouth open spilling thousands of curses from his dirty mouth. You were taking him so well, being so good for him. He needed you to feel how good you were making him feel.
"Fuck princess your pussy's swallowing my cock up so well. I could fuck you all day. Just imagine what I could do if I had this pussy every day and night. So tight around my dick, I could practically feel you're dripping down my cock," He spat praise after praise from his plumped red lips. You whimpered at his words, no one ever said such dirty things to you before. Maybe after this, you could still keep Haechan open for a future fuck.
"Fuck baby you squeezing so hard around my cock," he said pushing his chest out and flexing his biceps around your waist pounding into your small wet hole. "Fuck Haechan you feel so good inside me," you pleaded a moan escaping your lips. Your head falls back on your soft pillow the headboard smacking into the wall. Thank God your neighbors were on vacation.
You continued to clench around the boy squeezing him so deliciously tight he couldn't stand straight. He fell forward rutting his hips into you like a dog. Vigorously he kept his pace loving the way you moaned his name loud enough for everyone to hear. You wrapped your arm around him pulling him close to you his mouth wrapping around your nipple sucking on the hardened nub.
"Fuck princess you're doing so well for Daddy," he praised against your skin. The praise was getting to your head and going straight down to your pussy and the cocky mother fucker knew it too.
You caught his devilish smirk. You couldn't let him think he had you, you had to remind him where he was and who he was fucking. You pulled his mouth away using all your strength to flip him over slipping out of him. He let out a small whine disappointed, he was so close.
You straddled his waist aligning his cock at your entrance. You leaned down body slightly hovering over his. You licked a strip on his lips catching his focus. His chest rose quickly up and down slight pants in every breath he took. Sweat glistened all over his body under your dimly lit bedroom light. His tone, honey skin just barely shone courtesy of the moon.
His brown locks in all different places pointing to opposite sides of the room. Parts of his skin, including his face a burning red color from all the grabbing and smacking. The imprint of his fingers is still on your waist and arms. When you stood up high above him you could feel your juice run down your leg. When you leaned forward you could feel it drip onto his leg.
So you gathered so of it on your index finger trancing it over his lips. He puckered his lips trying to suck your finger between his teeth. You chuckled pulling your finger away. Your fingers came together grabbing onto his chin and holding him in place.
"You seem to have forgotten who's in charge here. I'd hit you again but I think you liked that," You said Haechan felt his cheeks warm up a blush rising on them as you spoke about his secret kink. You lifted your hand the other and placed it on his hard chest right where you could feel his heartbeat quicken. He was hoping you were doing what he believed you were.
You played with the fabric around his eyes. "You have a lot to say when you can't see me. But how about when I take this off," you said barely above his face. "Can you still talk as good as you fuck when you can see me?" You asked just above a whisper. He nodded slowly hoping anything he'd say would just get you to remove the blindfold. You smirked moving back taking the ribbon in your eyes and slowly peeling it from his eyes.
His eyes fluttered open widening the minute he saw you. Straddling his waist, naked and wet just like he dreamed. He reached out his hands needing so desperately to touch you with with his eyes. He groaned at the sight pulling you forward watching your pussy slide against his cock jerking it on his tummy.
Brows furrowed and hands tight on your waist he let his tip touch your clit and pussy jerk his shaft. He couldn't put his thoughts into words. He couldn't even feel you all that well, the condom in the way. But still, we are so intoxicated by you, the woman he dreamed about. Obsessed with the very idea that you wanted him this close.
You brought your hand stopping him. You pulled back rising high. He stammered his words a part of him not ready to see you fuck him. But the other half screaming at him to just let you do what you needed to do, you were already giving him everything and he wanted it to continue that way.
"Y/n can we- Oh Fuck," he cursed feeling you push into him sucking his cock so well. "Fuck, Fuck, Fuck," he cursed as you rutted your hips against him. His eyes jumped out of their socket and his lips formed an O as he reached so far into you. His hands help you thrust forward.
“Fuck you feel so good," he groaned his head falling back on your pillow. You slide your hips up slowly and then let your ass fall back on to his lap, your bubbly flesh rippling as they slap against his thighs. There’s a faint slick noise in the background. Your pussy leaking all over his fat cock. Creamy white slick dribbling down his shaft and to his balls.
His chest rising up and down sweat dripping down his chest. "You doing so well for me baby," you praised hand sliding up his chest and wrapping around his neck giving it a gentle squeeze causing a choked moan to spill from his mouth. His lips pouted whimpers fell from his throat. You continued flexing your hips into him quickly chasing your high.
"Fuck baby," He cursed trying to get the words out but your grip on his neck was too tight. "I'm gonna cum," he coughed. You released some of the pressure you had on his neck watching as he gasped for air. But he didn't stop nor push you away continuing to pull your hips forward. He felt his climax approaching quickly, he wouldn't be able to hold on much longer.
His whole body twitched his mouth falling open and back arching off your mattress. "Fuck baby I'm cuming," he groaned snapping his hips into yours. He spilled into the condom legs shaking and toes curling as he came.
Your clit rubbed against his pelvis chasing after your high that was so close you could taste it. "Fuck me too," you moaned the knot in your stomach bursting coating his cock. You both caught your breath before you slipped out of him. You lay on your back chest rising up and down. Haechan leaned over to wrap his arms around your wiats but you stopped him.
"You can go. The door will lock itself when you leave," you said turning your neck to him his hand still placed on the curve of your hip. He raised a brow scoffing. "What? You kicking me out?"
You chuckled villainous smile on your lips. "What did you think was gonna happen? Don't your friends do it all the time? And so do you when you hang up on those girls and ghost them," you retorted with a shrug of your shoulders. With wide eyes, he looked so offended. "So this was all what some stupid lesson? he asked showing his defense.
You leaned up to him placing a soft peck on his cheek. "Better?" you asked. He huffed standing up from your bed. He gathered his clothes and got dressed. He kept looking back at you but you hadn't even turned to face him just playing with the blanket that covered half your body. He scoffed shaking his head feeling used and not in the way he intended to be.
"So that's it?" he asked hands snapping at his waist now fully dressed minus his black boots. "You take my virginity and kick me out like some slut?" he asked motioning to your bed. You sighed turning to him and pulling the blanket to cover your body. You sat up on your pillows supporting your back and turning to your side to pull out your baby wipes. You cleaned yourself as you spoke to him.
"Haechan don't make me explain it to you. You and your selfish little dirty friends do this to girls all the time. Whether you fuck them in person or online so what makes a difference if I do it?" you asked him. He remained shut knowing deep down he couldn't fight back. Everything you were saying was true. But it made him think. Could this have something to do with Si Cheng?
"Is this because of Si Cheng?" he asked. He picked at your wound and it stung. You hid the hurt on your face. You coudln't let him see you as weak. You straighten yourself throwing away the baby wipe keeping your cool.
"You think I wanted to fuck you because of your idiotic friend? Regardless if I told you if I fucked him or not you wouldn't believe me. So I think it's best if you keep the questions out of your head and don't worry about my business. I fucked you right? Isn't that what you always wanted?" you asked a sly smirk on your lips. You couldn't help but smirk, you had hit another nerve.
He scoffed shaking his head unable to spit anything back at you. Even if you fucked Si Cheng or not he still got to fuck you and that's what mattered. He turned away opening your door but before he could leave you stopped him.
"Oh Haechan," you called. He stopped his hand on the doorknob. He turned his head slightly the corner of his eyes watching you from over his neck. "Yes?" he asked laced with attitude.
You made an o shape of your lips pretending his word stung. You wanted to laugh but you'd save it for Wendy. Instead, you shook your thoughts clearing your throat to speak.
"Tell anyone about this and I'll have my father cut off your dick and have it mailed to you by Christmas," you warned. His heart rate quickened. Men, and women, anyone for that matter who messed with you never returned once your father was involved. All he did was nod, he even turned and bowed to you as he left.
"Would you like this open or closed?" he asked.
"Closed is fine," you responded. He nodded quickly waving, "Have a goodnight," he said closing the door behind him. You could hear him quickly run down the hallway. Then a few minutes later a shut and lock of your door. You stood up out of bed to handle your business. When you returned to bed in fresh clothes you pulled out your list crossing off Haechan's name.
"I have to be careful," you said warning yourself. Yangyang may not have questioned you but for a moment of weakness, Haechan did. You were able to save your ass this time, but next time you have to be more careful.
You looked down your list seeing who was next.
Na Jaemin
The campus dealer.
This should be real fun you thought to yourself smiling at your list as you folded it back off. You clapped your hands together light shutting off completely. You put on your sleeping mask, pull it down your eyes, and turn to your side falling to sleep.
When Haechan arrived home that night Jisung waited in his room seeing the boy stumble in. Based on his face your plan worked. Jisung smiled to himself catching Haechan's attention.
"What's got you smiling all stupid like that?" he asked. Jisung scoffed, he was taking his attitude out on him like always. He shrugged, "Life has been going well for me. Made some new friends," he responded watching Haecahn flop on his bed. "Lucky you," he said face in his pillows. He remained there for a few seconds before he pushed up.
"Bad night?" Yangyang asked. Haechan sighed running a hand throw his hair.
"It seems like it's not gonna work between me and that girl I was telling you about," he said disappointed. Yangyang sighed, "That makes two of us," he responded trying to make him feel better.
Jisung pulled out his phone to text you.
Sung- He's pissed lol
He waited for your response. He placed his phone down looking towards the right. Right next door was Yuta's now shared room with Jaemin. He smirked knowing Jaemin was probably going to be one of the easiest yet.
--
You couldn't wait for Jaehyun's party this Saturday.
To Be Continued...
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Thank you all so much for reading Part 3 of my 10-part series Easy A. I really hope you enjoyed Part 3: The Gamer and I truly didn't mean for it to be so long. Overall thank you so much for reading a staying tuned for the next part of my series. Part 4: The Supplier!
If you know someone who would enjoy this don't be shy to share it with them! Please remember to like and vote!
Tags: @sexygrass @jakiki94 @90s-belladonna @soobiverse @ethelia @notevenheretbh1 @scarfac3 @toroufriteh @renyoungrecs @yumekowhore
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xmads-omensx · 2 months ago
Note
Noah meeting you and slowly learning that you're a huge history/archeology/paleontology nerd. He noticed you would drop random facts or correct facts (especially while watching your favorite movie; Jurassic Park). Falling for you a little bit more everyday when he finds out you are way smarter than you look (dumb blonde jokes inserted here haha) and he loves that your house is basically a museum.
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Word Count: 1,470
Pairing: Noah Sebastian X Reader
Content Warnings: swearing, very vague mentions and description of a mummified person, questions surrounding morality of museums
Tags: @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @lacy1986 @collidewiththesav @kenjipepsi1 @follow-me-down-to-wonderland @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @chey-h @tosoundlessdarkistare @thisbicc @fadingangelwisp
ANON YOU GET ME! Not to pick favourites right now, but this is literally my fave request ever!! I'm such a literature and history nerd. SMOOCHES TO YOU ANON
(and yes I did put some of my uni museum assignment ideas here but we shall move bc it is still HEAVYYY on my mind rn)
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As a self-proclaimed nerd, it was easy to be misjudged.
Typically, nerds were associated with comic books, maths, science and the like, which I most definitely was into don’t get me wrong, but I was a different kind of nerd.
The kind that finds true joy by learning heaps of useless information about dinosaurs and other extinct creatures. The kind that knows just a little too much about the Berlin Wall. The kind that you really want on your pub quiz team for the history round.
That kind of nerd.
Dating came with its challenges, since I had to physically refrain from correcting my dates on their incorrect factual knowledge, which I had discovered didn’t exactly go down too well the hard way.
Meeting Noah was an absolute blessing. He was a nerd too, not quite the same kind as me, but a nerd none the less, and I loved him for it.
Despite this, Noah never knew how into history I really was.
I had told him about my interest in anime and sci-fi movies, which he had really taken to, but my history obsession never really came up.
Our dates and hangouts had regularly consisted of watching movies or some episodes of an anime, but nothing that had particularly made my heart leap with joy and my brain whirl with interest.
Until our five month anniversary.
Obviously, that isn’t a long time and we didn’t do anything crazy to celebrate, but Noah still went above and beyond with preparations.
He had laid out blankets over his bed, with trays full of Chinese food and snacks, with my favourite soft drinks on his bedside table.
It was quite beautiful to be honest.
The dimly lit room was cozy, with the fairy lights that I had bought him hanging down from above his wardrobe, and his LEDs illuminating the room in a soft orange glow.
His TV was displayed on his wall in front of his bed, further illuminating the room with the familiar image of the Jurassic Park title card.
Noah had never seen it before, and had made it his personal mission to watch them, seeing as it was my favourite movie franchise.
“I thought that we should watch something you like this time, instead of always watching what I want.” He said, breaking the silence with his soft voice.
“Sound like a good plan.” I replied, reaching up to kiss him on the cheek. Noah had to lean down to meet me halfway so that my lips would actually connect with his cheek.
We snuggled down on his bed, with my head buried in his warm chest. The beating of his heart relaxing me as I was absorbed into the movie.
However, the peace didn’t last long.
“Fucking stupid.” I muttered when the scene depicting John Hammond explaining how the park was created to his guests.
“What?” Noah laughed.
“It’s stupid! This whole mosquito bullshit!” I exclaimed.
Noah paused the movie in order to let me explain my grievance with the scene.
“How is it bullshit? Baby it’s not real.” He said with a slight laugh.
“Well obviously Noah! But they could have at least made it more plausible, because then it would be a better movie!” I said, throwing my hands up in frustration.
“How is this inaccurate baby?” Noah asked, slightly intrigued by where I was going with this.
“The mosquito. Only female mosquitos bit animals, and there is no way in hell that they had the means, time or budget to spend all of that time identifying the gender of the mosquito, which they portray as male. And, there is no way to guarantee that that particular mosquito did, in fact, bite a dinosaur!” I was out of breath by the time I had finished ranting to Noah.
He simply chuckled, before pulling me back into his chest and pressing play on the movie, letting me rant about all of the inaccuracies as we went, which there are a lot of.
By the end of the movie, I had fallen asleep listening to Noah’s soothing heartbeat, whilst Noah sat and thought about all of the new and completely useless information he had gained throughout the movie.
He kissed the top of my head before snuggling into my body and drifting off to sleep.
The next time I had overshared far too many facts was when Noah invited me out on a group trip to the museum.
He had planned to go with his group of friends since they had a new samurai section that they all wanted to go and visit, whilst he also saw this as the perfect opportunity for me to meet his friends.
We all met up at a nearby coffee shop and hit it off like a house on fire.
Folio and Matt rapidly became my partners in crime as we walked behind Noah, making small jokes about him and giggling, making him turn around and look at us funny before walking away.
The museum was huge. Tall marble pillars stood strong outside the entrance, giving off an ancient Greek look.
Inside, the high ceilings held skylights which illuminated the entire building in a bright, warm glow, perfectly highlighting each of the exhibits.
The guys made a beeline for the samurai section, whilst I took my time looking at various artefacts from across the world, sprouting off additional facts that weren’t on the little information stands next to them, which had clearly impressed Folio as he whispered to Noah, “She’s a lot smarter than she looks.” And “I wish I was as smart as her.” Which mad made me laugh.
I never felt as though I was particularly smart, I just knew a lot of facts about a lot of things. But I guess that is more or less the definition of smart.
“Hey babe.” Noah called out, “The museum kind of reminds me of your place.”
“How come?” I asked, slightly confused by what he meant by this.
“All of this old stuff. It doesn’t all look important, but it is important. I don’t think that makes any sense.” He rambled.
“I collect a lot of stuff, if that’s what you’re getting at. I like to collect old things.” I laughed.
“Yeah, that’s what I was trying to say.” He laughed, pulling me underneath his arm and placing a kiss on my head.
I always had mixed feelings on museums.
Sure, they were cool to look around and see all of the different artefacts and displays, but something in my gut told me that it was wrong.
Was it okay that museums were taking all of these different things that don’t belong to them?
It was the archaeology exhibit that solidified my stance on the issue.
Right in the middle of the room sat a sarcophagus. An open sarcophagus at that. And inside this sarcophagus laid a mummified person. To the museum’s credit, they were covered enough to keep them decent, but the whole display boiled my blood.
Noah noticed my change in demeanour quite rapidly.
“You doing okay, bub?” He asked, wrapping an arm around my shoulder.
“I hate this.” I said simply. “She doesn’t even get a say in this. They’re using her like she’s an object.” I sighed, gesturing defeatedly at the display.
“Do you want to go and look at something else.” Noah asked quietly.
I wasn’t sure, so I just shrugged.
“That’s so fucked up.” Nicholas said, looking at the display.
“It’s not fair.” I said, loud enough for the others to hear. “If they’re displaying her like this for education, then it’s pointless because she isn’t teaching us anything that we don’t already know. Besides, it’s inaccurate. They’ve taken away the amulets she would have been buried with that she would have needed to get to the afterlife. These canopic jars are replicas, so they don’t even have the real thing. It’s a piss poor attempt at bringing the past to the present.” I ranted.
The guys fell silent before Jolly began to speak.
“Museums suck balls.” He said simply.
“Fuck yeah they do!” I exclaimed, making the rest of the guys laugh before suggesting we got get some food instead.
The rest of the day was spent with the guys quizzing me on random questions that popped into their heads.
It was nice feeling this close to people that I had only just met, who were impressed by my stupidly vast knowledge of history.
“Why history?” Noah asked. “Like, surely there are cooler subjects out there, like… biology or something.”
“Hey!” I exclaimed. “History is cool, dumbass!”
The guys all burst into laughter at the look of pure shock that had crossed his handsome features.
Being a history nerd was rapidly becoming one of the best decisions that I had ever made.
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vixensbrainrotts · 1 year ago
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Tokyo revengers headcanons
Content: Tr headcanons
Content warnings: None I hope, please let me know if there are any!
Vixen's two cents: I’ve been wanting to dump all my headcanons somewhere for a while now so here! I don’t think that these are all, but I’m gonna make a second post about any further headcanons I have. Also, i apologize for not including everyone here, ill make sure to include them next time. I hope you enjoy, and if you do, please tell me about it! Don’t be afraid to send me requests either, I’d love to write most anything (I’m uncreative sometimes)! Oh also, what are some of your headcanons? Do you agree with any of mine? I’ll link the part two once i figure out how to do that lol
(VOLUME II)
Kokonoi who is genuinely so bothered by bugs you won’t believe it. He has to leave the room as soon as he sees the „threat“, and fast.
Izana who curses loudly on Filipino whenever he accidentally hurts himself. You can hear him shout from across the whole house when he bumps himself on a corner.
Chifiyu who has a passion for graffiti. He loves tagging and wild styling and spraying elaborate throwup-styles on walls on Toman turf.
Inui who is colorblind, which is really unfortunate because he has an interest in fashion and styles. He relies on Koko for the greater part, but has recently discovered apps that identify color, which has vastly improved his personal style and allowed him to take on more challenging shades.
The Katawa twins who have an honestly really impressive Pokémon card collection and often play against each other to pass time. The amount they have spent on it is sorta concerning and more often than not stop by the little magazine store to buy another pack to "improve their decks" before gang meetings.
Hakkai who has a distinct dislike for the color orange but keeps finding himself surrounded it. He hates it but the walls in his room are orange. He could puke because his favorite faux-fur-coat is a darker orange. There’s no reasoner doesn’t like the color but something about it makes his skin crawl.
Hanma who is German/Russian and makes sure everyone knows it. He is proud of his heritage and will often use German and Russian idioms when conversating. It’s all fun and games till he starts swearing in his mother tongues during fights, bashing in his opponent’s skulls whilst cursing in a foreign, very aggressive manner.
Nahoya and Souya who work like devils in the kitchen. It’s a perfect tandem in between them, they somehow always know what the other wants and needs. If Nahoya needs a hand in opening the oven, Souya’s doing a 360 no look opening. If Souya’s hands are messy from kneading the dough, Nahoya automatically turns on the tap for hand washing. Twin telepathy is real and they’re the number one proof.
Mucho who can’t do shit in terms of math. You need him busy? Ask him for 7x9 and he’ll be unresponsive for the next 3-5 minutes. It’s really frustrating to him because he genuinely puts in so much effort to understand the formulas, but the numbers simply don’t click in his brain.
Smiley who got the smiley piercing the moment he found out about it. It’s really impressively healed and works so well on his face. Some even say that his smile has gotten wider ever since he got it. He also has a poorly healed nose stud on the left side that he only keeps in for sentimental value. He got it in the seventh grade during school and he got his ass whooped when he came back home with it.
Kisaki who unintentionally practices calligraphy because he writes exclusively in cursive. All of his notebooks look fake because all the letters look identical and everything is evenly spaced. The highlighter girlies in his classes wish death upon him on a daily.
Rindou who’s cracked at Chemistry for no reason. He doesn’t even have to try, it’s like the formulas unfold in front of him and the laws and rules just make sense. He can’t even explain it but ask him anything, and I mean anything he can give you the right answer. Just don’t ask him to be your lab partner. He has a nasty history of breaking test tubes.
Kakucho who knows how to dress. Like really know how to dress. Anywhere, anytime he’s looking like a Pinterest board. He doesn’t really try or occupy himself with things fashion, but he just looks so good and coordinated all the time. He thought it was natural to know what looks good or not, so he’s sometimes a bit perplexed by the things that his peers wear. He tries to be nice when he tells them it doesn’t work, but comes across a little brash because it frustrates him.
Kazutora who has unnaturally sharp canines. Like, it’s kinda scary sometimes because they poke out of his mouth even when it’s closed. He’ll commonly run his tongue over them when he’s bored, poking and prodding at them to check if they’re still sharp. It’s one of the features of his face he really does like.
Mitsuya who gossips like a Girl. He lives for drama and tea (silently) and due to his club being occupied by mostly girls, he’s surrounded by it constantly. The girls talk and talk and talk and he eats it up. The scary part is that he remembers nearly every part of it, so he knows so much. He’ll never share it with anyone but likes to know what’s happening. Sometimes he even correctly predicts scandals due to background knowledge.
Leading from the last one, Mitsuya who has a deep voice. One that rumbles softly when he speaks and sounds like the ocean when he laughs. It’s a killer during after-noon classes when he has to present or read something cause it has such a calming effect. He’s put multiple of his classmates asleep accidentally.
Draken who know just the tiniest bit about sowing from helping out in Mistuya’s workshop. He knows how to close a seam, he knows how to sew a button and he knows how to patch a hole and that’s it. He’s lowkey proud of it though.
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mrsparrasblog · 11 months ago
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Highschool AU pt.2
Summary: You and your Brother moved away from Austria because of your parents Divorce, making you attend Northbridge Academy in Exeter, England. On your first day you meet the bullied Simon Riley and the overly extroverted John MacTavish. As if dealing with puberty, sports and your grades wasn't hard enough you fell in love not only with your Bestfriend Simon but also with Johnny, that Johnny was in love with both of you didn't make the Dynamic better
Pt.1
November 1990
As the days passed, you fell into a comfortable routine. You made a point to sit next to Simon in every class, despite Johnny's attempts to claim the seat besides you. You got used to Johnny though; he was funny and surprisingly smart. He even beat you in physics once, which made you incredibly mad. You always wanted to excel in academics; sometimes it felt like it was the only thing you were good at—getting good grades. If you couldn't be good at that, what special thing would be left in you?
"Lizzie, it's just an A, who cares if it's not an A+? You won't die from it," Simon nagged. He never understood your drive to excel in school. He wasn’t bad himself, though; he mostly got Bs, especially in math, history, and chemistry. He had some Cs in English and Housekeeping —claiming it was unimportant for him that he did poorly in sewing. He was right, though; that's why you didn’t pick that incredibly dumb subject and chose advanced German instead, which was like a free pass for you. Unfortunately, you were in the same class as John, the annoying new friend of your brother. He was always so flirty, although he was cute.
"How do you know? Maybe I'll fall dead on the ground in the next second."
"Would be a blessing for some of us," Simon replied. After a few weeks of school, you were surprised to find out that Simon wasn’t like he looked. He wasn’t shy and uncomfortable; he pulled lots of jokes—bad ones—next to you. Worse, his humor was dry and mean, making you chuckle all the time, which he secretly loved.
"You're an idiot, Si."
"And still, I'm your favorite, Lizzie."
"Only because Johnny isn’t a real challenge to you."
"Don’t let Johnny hear that; he will be mad."
"Maybe he needs a bit of an ego shrink," You laughed.
Simon and you walked towards your table. It was like in all those American movies you watched when you were allowed to watch TV. Tiffany and her squad had their own table, and then there were tables full of footballers where Kyle sat most of the time, except when Johnny begged him to sit with you. Michael, like the perfect big brother he was, was always where you were. And where Michael was, John and sometimes Nik would be, if he didn’t spend 90% of his time in detention.
Every Thursday was mail delivery day, the best part of the week. You always looked forward to a letter from Dad. He told you about all the different places he visited for work, and there was always a postcard in the letter. You had over 120 postcards, all placed on the wall of your dorm. At least that made you feel at home. Northbridge Academy wasn’t as bad as you feared at the beginning. The teachers were great, the school was fun, and you had Simon and Johnny. The only downside was my dorm mates. While the boys were more than lucky despite Si complaining about Michael's snoring, they still had a nice group. Meanwhile, you were stuck with Tiffany, Laurie, and Anne in a room, and it was even worse than you imagined.
Simon opened his mail, and his expression changed. He tried to regain his composure quickly, but he couldn't fool me. You knew something was up, so you poked him under the table, trying to get his mail. Surprisingly, he gave it to you without any further resistance, and for once, You wished he hadn’t.
Hello Simon, Im on a camping trip with your Mom and Thomas. Don´t bother coming over the long weekend. We wont be there. Stay at your trust fund school. Dad 
"Si—"
"No, Lizzie." He stood up and left the table, surprising everyone else who hadn’t noticed anything. Typical boys. You followed him into his dorm and sat next to him on the bed.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"It's not a big deal, Lizzie. They're just on vacation."
"Is it?"
"Lizzie."
"You know you could come with Mich and me. Mom wouldn’t mind at all; she loves hosting people and all that stuff. We can spend more time together, and you don’t need to stay in this musty room—like, really, do you boys even clean?" You laughed at the chaos of the room. Everywhere, there were paint stains, football shoes, and, on what you guessed was Nik’s and John’s bed, an E-guitar was placed.
"Lizzie, it’s okay. You know I can practice a bit before the start of ice hockey season."
"Pleaseeeeeeee." You looked at him with puppy eyes. I needed him to come with me.
"Okay, but only this once." He agreed, and you gave him a big bear hug.
SIMONS POV 
"Whit dae ye mean ye gang hame wi' Ellie?"
"Was invited," I said shortly.
"Was invited too," John chimed in, while he tuned his guitar, making noises not safe for humanity.
"How come is a' body invited 'cept me?" Johnny started to whine. The answer would be easy for anyone with eyes: she doesn’t like his flirting, she is scared of things like this, and asking her to marry him after she gave him a cookie wasn’t the smartest choice.
"I wasn’t invited," Kyle replied shortly.
"You're not invited, Johnny, 'cause ye need to tone it down with my sister. She is only 13; she doesn’t care about boys right now. And asking her at any chance if she wants to marry you makes her scared. Ye don’t know anything about girls, do ye?" That was the most words I've heard from König since, well, ever, but he was right. Johnny needed to tone it down. I didn’t like how Lizzie felt insecure whenever he did it and clung to me. The truth is Lizzie wasn’t afraid of him or anything; she even liked Johnny as a friend. She just thought his advances were jokes. Johnny liked to joke a lot, giving him the reputation of a class clown. And so, his big gestures for her felt like a joke to her, especially since she was so insecure at heart. I just never understood why? She was smart, funny, much cooler than any other girl, and she was pretty, not that I would ever tell that to someone.
"Just trying to be good, König," Johnny muttered.
"If ye weren’t a lovesick little puppy, he’d probably punch you into oblivion," John mentioned.
"You can come too, Johnny," König replied, still giving him the big brother glance.
"Sweet."
"Wait, how do we all fit in a car?" I asked, afraid that Johnny would take my place, and I needed to stay here. But everyone just looked at me weirdly, and I didn’t know why.
The next day, on our way to Lizzie's house, I finally knew why. There was a fucking limousine with black windows, probably bulletproof, like in James Bond movies. A small man in his 50s walked outside of the car wearing a black suit and smiling as he walked towards Lizzie, taking her baggage from her hands.
"He doesn’t look like Lizzie’s Dad," I said. It was true; they didn’t look similar, but still, she hugged him like you’d hug a family member, I guess?
John started to laugh. "You really don’t know a lot about Beth." Beth? Why did he call my Lizzie Beth? That was a shitty name.
"I know a lot about her."
"Not about her world, little one." I hated it when people reduced me for my small frame. I didn’t want to be the skinny short boy walking behind Lizzie all the time in need of her support. At least she didn’t see me that way.
"Si, John, Johnny, that’s Alfred, he is our family, Butler," Lizzie said, smiling at Alfred like he was a family member more than a Butler.
We sat down in the limo. Lizzie, of course, sat next to me, much to the dislike of Johnny. He kinda grew on me, though; he was funny and extroverted, and he wasn’t as posh as Kyle, who was a nice bloke but just didn’t get it. He was always complaining, as if he had problems, of course, he hadn’t. He was rich, good at football, and good-looking.
Lizzie fell asleep after a while, her head resting on my shoulder. I didn’t dare to move for the rest of the ride. She looked so peaceful when she didn’t move her lips and spoke.
"Mate, that's unfair. Why does Lizzie sleep on you instead of me?" Johnny whined, but I ignored him. "I liked her first, brocade and everything, Simon."
"You don’t call dips on my sister, or I'll cut your tongue out," König spoke calmly. He was confusing me; he was mostly silent but always threatened everyone who came too close to Lizzie. He never threatened me though, of course not; no one saw a threat in me.
We arrived at a big white mansion, almost looking like the Buckingham Palace. I knew Lizzie was rich, but this rich? I should probably search Kortac up, what they did, and how her dad must be so rich.
John only shrugged as if it was nothing, making me feel like I was the dumb one. This wasn’t normal; why are they acting like this?
As I stepped into Lizzie's villa, my jaw practically hit the floor. I mean, I've seen big houses before, but this was something else. The entrance was like walking into a palace or something. The marble floors were so shiny
; I could see my reflection in them. And those pillars! They were taller than any trees I've ever seen, reaching up to a ceiling painted with fancy designs that made me feel like I was in a museum.
I couldn't help but gawk as I made my way through the place. The living room was like a dream. Soft, velvet couches and chairs were everywhere, so plush you could practically sink into them. Paintings and tapestries covered the walls, like something out of a history book. And don't even get me started on the fireplace! It was huge, with flames dancing and crackling like something out of a movie. All around were paintings that probably cost more than Mom's salary as a nurse.
The dining room was even more posh. A long, mahogany table stretched out in front of me, set with fancy plates and silverware that looked like they belonged in a museum. A chandelier hung overhead, sparkling with crystals and casting a warm light over everything.
In the kitchen, everything was shiny and new. Stainless steel appliances lined the walls, and there were bowls of fruit and baskets of bread everywhere. It smelled amazing, like something out of a cooking show. Chefs walked around the house; they had fucking chefs? I thought the Butler was much, but they had more staff. Didn’t rich people know how to cook for themselves?
As I wandered around, I couldn't help but feel a little jealous. I mean, we have a house; it's nice and all, but it's nothing like this. Lizzie's family must be really rich to live in a place like this. But as much as I envied her, I couldn't help but feel grateful that she was my friend, never judging me because of my scholarship like Tiffany did, and by the looks of it, Tiffany wasn’t even half as wealthy as Lizzie and König are.
"Mutter, Vater, Ich dachte Papa ist in Salzburg gerade," König said. He sounded more confident when he spoke German.
Lizzie's parents looked like nice people; her Dad was the tallest man I've ever seen and looked a bit intimidating, while her mom looked a lot like Lizzie herself, just older.
"Dein Vater hat gehört, ihr kommt hier her und ist direkt gekommen," her dad replied.
"Also, seid ihr nicht wieder zusammen?" Lizzie’s voice sounded so different in German, but she still sounded nice and soft.
"Nein, und sprech Englisch, das ist unhöflich gegenüber deinen Gästen," her mom scolded, her voice too loud for the small room.
"So, who do we have here?" Lizzie’s father asked curiously.
"I'm John Price, sir."
"Oh, like William Price?"
"Yes, that's my old man."
"We worked together quite a bit for his campaign."
"Wait, my dad worked with Kortac?" John lost the color of his face, and I really needed to know what the fuck Kortac is.
"I'm Johnny MacTavish."
"Well, didn’t hear of your family," Lizzie’s dad mustered Johnny.
"Richard, be nice," Lizzie’s mom scolded, in a tone too loud for the room. "Okay, and you are?" She gestured to me.
"Simon Riley, nice to meet you both, sir," I replied politely, shaking his hand, only to get my hand crushed.
As I followed Lizzie's family into the dining room, I couldn't believe my eyes. The table was like something out of a fancy restaurant, but way bigger. There were so many dishes spread out that I had never seen or tried before. I mean, I knew what a salad was and some of the other stuff, but there were these little black things in jars that Lizzie's dad called "caviar." I had no idea what that was, but everyone seemed to be enjoying it, so I tried a tiny bit. It was salty and kinda strange, definitely not like anything I'd ever eaten. Johnny looked as confused as me; of course, the academy had fancy food, but this was weird. And so much different from what mom cooked for us, and I longed for her lasagna right now.
Then there were all these different forks and spoons and knives laid out next to the plates. I was used to just one fork and one spoon at home, but here, it was like a whole set of tools just for eating. I glanced over at Lizzie, who noticed my confusion and tried to discreetly explain which fork to use for which course. But I could tell I was still getting it wrong.
Lizzie's family seemed used to all this fancy stuff, chatting away as they effortlessly used their array of utensils. Meanwhile, I was struggling not to knock over a glass or use the wrong fork. Her mom smiled kindly at me and offered some advice on what to try next, but I couldn't shake the feeling of being out of place. John and König, of course, knew how to act. I noticed how Lizzie’s dad liked John, but Lizzie’s mom definitely liked me.
It was strange; they were so familiar with each other, chatting at dinner and laughing, listening to Lizzie ramble about the school teaching shitty German. It was so different than at home; no one screamed, no one cried, and, most importantly, no one punched each other.
Johnny and I slept in one of the various guest chambers, and it was so comfortable, the best sleep I've ever had until I heard Lizzie scream from next door. I ran towards her room; I didn’t know what was wrong, but I needed to find out.
She lay in her luxurious room, whining and shaking in her sleep. I always thought rich families like these never had any problems, but here she was having night terrors.
I sat next to her in bed, brushing my hand towards her silky hair. "I'm here, Lizzie, everything is good."
"Please don’t kill me; I don’t know anything," she cried, and then König walked in, pushing me to the side while grabbing her in his bulky arms, whispering to her something in German until she calmed down and slept peacefully again. Now, all of us stood in her room. I just wanted to comfort Lizzie, telling her everything would be fine again.
"What was this?" John asked.
"Nightmares."
"That’s more than nightmares, mate," Johnny said, earning a death glare from König. I didn’t know what I thought, but I stood up and walked towards her bed again, cuddling her like Mom and Dad always did. For the first time, I could protect someone, and I’d protect her like she protected me.
"LEAVE."
"No, she is my best friend; I won’t leave." Slowly, after minutes, John and Johnny climbed into Lizzie’s bed. All of us wanted to comfort the girl who gave us everything every day. And so all five of us played together in the bed, eager to protect her from whatever haunted her. It was nice; having her in my arms was the last thought before I slowly drifted into a peaceful sleep.
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talenlee · 11 months ago
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Game Pile: Sheriff of Nottingham
Sheriff of Nottingham is one of my favourite games that I will probably never get to properly play.
The core mechanism of Sheriff of Nottingham is a simple game of bluffing. It’s hide-and-seek with a deck of cards. The group are all playing merchants, and in each round, one player takes turns being the Sheriff of Nottingham. The Sheriff gets to inspect each of the players’ offerings, with a penalty if they inspect someone innocent and a reward if they find someone guilty.
That is the core of what goes into the game. Things like tallying scores, the distribution in the deck, burn cards and comparative weight of contraband, that’s all stuff that’s there to lend it texture, but in its absolute heart of hearts, this is a game where one player watches as two to five other players all line up to not tell them lies, honest, officer. Complicating it from just a straightforward ‘do you believe me?’ vs ‘do you not?’ is that players can wheedle and negotiate during the phase where the Sheriff is deciding whether or not to bust your chops, but also complicating that further is the way that the game is set up to have a clear and distinct boundary between whether you’re being investigated or not.
See, you could just have this game built around a deck of cards; you set say, four cards in front of the Sheriff and say ‘hey, this is all apples, please don’t look,’ but they pick it up to look at it – when in that process is it too late for the Sheriff to turn back? How quickly can you blurt a bribe that’ll stop the whole affair out? It’s a really interesting thing where when you deal with physical, material objects, truly binary boundaries between two game states can be very challenging to maintain cleanly.
What Sheriff of Nottingham does to facilitate this is a little purse in which you slip your cards. Once you do, you’re committed; there’s no almost-in, or not-quite in cards. You choose, you put them in, and then you close the purse with a clasp. That clasp is a push-clasp, which also means that pulling it open is a little bit of effort. The player commits when they submit their bag and the Sheriff commits to searching the bag once they pop that clasp.
It does not escape me that this effort creates an access problem for players with weaker hands. This is along with the way that this game of pretty much pure bluffing discourages players who don’t like to lie or can’t lie, and the way that the whole game presents real challenges for players who struggle with on-the-fly mathematics. See, one of the complaints of Sheriff of Nottingham is that the actual resolution of the game is a bit fiddly; once you get to the end of the game you work out how your score works based on the number of cards you got, and to facilitate that, you get a little paper pad. Trust me, a game that ends with everyone doing complex math has to be satisfying at every step of the way, or, you know what, no, it has to be Wingspan. Wingspan can end the game with fiddly math and note taking, that’s how good a game has to be in order to make this not a pain.
Sheriff of Nottingham is an introductory game in disguise. You don’t need to buy into an elaborate fiction to understand it, even though the narrative supposes a modest connection to a Robin Hood kind of story. The fiction of the game is that the players represent traders who are moving into a market, in irregular groups, and each time they move in, they get their carts checked (or not) by the local sheriff who is of mercurial mood and disposition. In fact, buying into the fiction creates a question of why bribing the guards goes into the pockets of another player, so really, it’s for the best you don’t. The gameplay loop of trying to fool one another presents itself very obviously and by pushing all the scoring complexity to the end game, nobody needs to track exactly how well they’re doing while they learn.
I think that a scoring system that doesn’t rely on doing math but instead relies on dividing your end-game cards would be the best way to do things. Make it so it’s not that apples are worth 2 points and the player with the most apples gets a bonus, but instead, you keep every third apple card, and have scores be much lower. Numbers would need tweaking to ensure that the coinage scores weren’t that important – the fiction clearly indicates that
The problem of course is that when the game is this simple, built around a mechanism so tightly defined, is that it’s essentially, a tension engine. Not only is it a matter of a game where you have to lie to people – even if only to not seem completely honest! – it’s a game where you’re presented with a non-stop sequence of tense experiences. It might as well be Shoplifting Simulator for the way the game’s mechanics inspire people to start sweating!
And therein lies the barrier for entry.
I love this game. I love watching this game. We use it in our classes to teach students who have never played a board game before how to go from ‘nothing’ to ‘proficiently playing.’ It has a beautiful, almost predictable arc where poeple play the first rounds in quiet silence, then someone gets away with their first lie and suddenly there’s a layer of tension and people start to laugh. Then someone bribes someone else to investigate another player and suddenly there’s a new source of laughter.
I love to see it! I love to see the way players learn to tease one another, the way players learn to mess with one another.
Now remember that my play group often involves children and my mother.
This is not a game that fits my playgroup! And that’s okay to know and it’s okay to remember it! But then I get to enjoy watching people play it, either on the internet or in class.
Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!
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mariacallous · 11 months ago
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British exceptionalism means that we do not like to think of our politicians as extremists. Official paranoia, state-sponsored lying, half-mad ideas that play to bigoted prejudices: these evils do not afflict dear, sweet, safe old Blighty.
You need only glance at the press or watch the BBC to know that policies and politicians we would have no problem identifying as radical right if they appeared in Europe or the Trumpian corners of the United States, are treated as mainstream here in the UK.
To be fair, Rishi Sunak is not a typical strongman leader. He is small (5ft 5in) and without physical presence, oratorical skill, or a definable sense of purpose.
Sunak’s manner varies from  wide-eyed chirpiness when discussing his strangely marginal political passions – banning smoking, recruiting more maths teachers – to petulance when confronted with difficulties: “He comes across as snippy, and comes across as thin-skinned — which he is, when people challenge him,” said one former minister.
Labour politicians believe he will fall apart under the scrutiny of a general election campaign.
And yet this mediocre member of the superrich (our modern Malvolio married rather than earned his wealth) who received the best education the Western world can offer at Winchester college and Oxford and Stanford universities, is by any reasonable definition an extremist.
Sunak’s only saving grace is that he is as useless at extremism as he is at everything else and thus there is a limit to how much damage he can cause.
Within the past few hours Sunak passed into law the power to send asylum seekers to the quasi-dictatorship of Rwanda. The deportees will include genuine refugees, the victims of human trafficking, and Afghans who risked their lives serving the British armed forces in the war against the Taliban.
I have no doubt that radical right politicians across Europe would like to possess the same powers. But as things stand only Rishi Sunak has them and is able to set them to the Orwellian task of remoulding reality.
The UK Supreme Court ruled that the government could not deport people to Rwanda because it is not a safe country. It’s a quasi-dictatorship under Paul Kagame, a genuine and genuinely frightening strongman, who is engaged in covert warfare against neighbouring states. There’s no real judicial independence and the Rwandan government breached the terms of a previous asylum deal it had entered into with Israel.
The UK government has got round these objections by announcing that reality is now what Rishi Sunak says it is.
Sunak’s legislation declares that Rwanda is a safe country, even though it isn’t. From now on, an asylum seeker trying to stop the UK deporting him cannot use the actual existing repressions on the ground in Rwanda to challenge the government in UK courts.
Sunak says Rwanda is safe so it must be so. Maybe Sunak will move on to declare that black is white and 2+2=5, but for the time being he is limiting himself to creating an imaginary African republic where all is peace and light.
Lord Anderson, who as a former adviser to the UK state on terrorism is hardly a knee-jerk softie, put it well when he said of the government’s plans to end judicial oversight
“If Rwanda is safe as the government would have us declare, it has nothing to fear from such scrutiny. “Yet we are invited to adopt a fiction, to wrap it in the cloak of parliamentary sovereignty and to grant it permanent immunity from challenge. To tell an untruth and call it truth.”
To insist that lies are the truth is extreme. It is also the logical conclusion of the Brexit policy of concerted lying in the service of political ends, which has been running since 2016.
And speaking of Brexit and before I go any further, I should note that, with the exception of Geert Wilders, no European far-right leader advocates taking his or her country out of the EU. But Rishi Sunak was all for Brexit, and promised that “our nation would be freer, fairer and more prosperous outside the EU”.
We know how that went.
And we almost certainly know how the Rwanda deportations will go. They will fail, and Sunak will be a failed extremist because what he wants is impossible.
Look at it from the point of view of a right-winger who is furious that tens of thousands are crossing the English Channel and entering the country illegally. Throughout his life the Conservatives have betrayed him.  
David Cameron promised to reduce migration from the hundreds to tens of thousands, and failed to deliver. Brexit promised to return control of our borders. Instead, small boats cross the channel in a parody of the Dunkirk evacuation, while legal immigration has gone through the roof.
No pro-European politician would ever say this, but it does not mean that people have not noticed. By leaving the EU, the UK swapped European migrants who were largely white and, if they had a religion, it was Christianity, for migrants from the rest of the world who are largely not white and, if they have a religion, it is unlikely to be Christianity.
Despite all this Sunak is still bellowing that he will stop all the boats, which is as impossible as David Cameron’s fake promise to reduce migration to the tens of thousands.
He is bellowing because Conservatives are terrified that Reform (the latest Farage party) will send the Tories down to a landslide defeat.
They are trying to unite the right by assuming that right-wing and radical-wing voters are stupid, and won’t notice the attempt to con them with impossible promises.
It’s not working. At the moment we are in an unprecedented situation, where Labour enjoys a poll lead on immigration.
For those on left who say there is no difference between Starmer’s Labour and the Tories ought to notice that Labour holds that lead even though it is absolutely opposed to the Rwanda obscenity, when Tony Blair’s Labour party would probably have gone along with it.
In the Commons yesterday, Stephen Kinnock, Labour’s shadow immigration minister, tore into the government.
He pointed out that the cost of the vain attempt to save Sunak’s skin – will be about “£2 million per deportee”. As only a few hundred are ever likely to go, tens of thousands more will be left “in expensive hotels, stuck in a perma-backlog at a staggering cost to the taxpayer.”
Assuming, that is, anyone goes at all.
 Yesterday Sunak made a rather pathetic admission that no plane will leave for 12 weeks. We shall see. Despite the government’s best efforts to rewrite the law and threaten the European Court of Human Rights, there can still be legal challenges which may last until the next election.
Cynics say the government would like nothing better than the flights to be stopped so it can blame left-wing lawyers in the campaign. I think they are attributing intelligence to the prime minister he does not possess.
Put like this, the UK’s failed extremists do not seem so reprehensible.  But look at what they have done. Since David Cameron in 2010 they have never explained the necessity for immigration in an honest conversation with the public.
They have pandered to right-wing and radical right-wing sentiment and then infuriated voters by making promises they could never keep. In doing so they have prepared the ground for genuinely extremist politicians.
We have already paid a price for their trickery with Brexit and I doubt the full bill is in yet.
We are fortunate that Rishi Sunak is too hopeless to be dangerous. We may not be so lucky in the future.
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duchesschameleon · 11 months ago
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five (a Delphi Racing fic)
a percy jackson x formula 1 fic
pairing: percy jackson x annabeth chase
rating: t for teen
warnings: alcohol mention
read this fic on ao3
Percy lets out a shaky breath, foot bouncing on the floor.
One more race. Thats all thats left of this season, all that’s left for him to win a championship. One more race to beat Jason and solidify his place in history.
“Hey,” a voice calls out, pulling Percy out of his head. “You okay there?”
He looks up, sees the familiar face of Annabeth Chase, the head engineer and car designer for Delphi Racing popping into his room.
“I’m good. Just. Last race. Last chance to win this thing for you.”
Annabeth steps further into his driver room, smiles softly at him. “Win it for yourself, Seaweed Brain. Double points finish should wrap up the constructors championship for us. If my math is right, Jupiter Motors needs a 1-2 finish to beat us on that front. And that’s not happening, because I’ve got the best driver on the grid in my car.”
Percy smirks at her, sitting up a little straighter. “Best driver on the grid, huh?”
She rolls her eyes at him, faking exasperation. “I’m not saying it again. Not until you win this race.”
“Got it, Wise Girl. Win from pole and make it a grand slam?”
“Sounds like a good plan. I think that’s the Plan Alpha Grover has for you, if I heard the briefing correctly.”
Percy barks out a laugh, his nerves calmed by Annabeth’s presence, the way they always are.
“Thanks, Annabeth,” he says, standing up and taking her hand. “Guess I have a championship to win now.”
“Anytime, Percy,” she replies, squeezing his hand. “Go win your fifth championship, bring it home.”
——
He brings it home. Wins from pole, fighting off Jason Grace with all he’s got and manages to snag a fastest lap to complete the grand slam he promised Annabeth.
It’s a close race, the gap to Jason never bigger than 10 seconds, and the two swap positions the whole race. It’s a hard fought win, but it’s a win. His fifth world drivers championship in a row and Delphi Racing’s fifth constructors championship in a row.
It’s a new record, and one Percy already wants to beat next year.
“That’s P1 Percy Jackson! You are the world champion, and you sealed the deal with a grand slam!” Grover says through the radio, his excitement palpable.
“Holy shit, holy shit we did it!!” Percy says back to his race engineer. “Thank you so much, everyone! Couldn’t have done it without you, Grover and everyone in the garage!!! Holy shit!!”
“Congrats, Seaweed Brain!! That’s a fifth world championship! I’m so proud of you, everyone here is.” It’s Annabeth’s voice on the radio this time, her smile evident in her excitement.
“Thanks for the amazing car, Wise Girl,” he responds. “Tell me we got the constructors championship too?”
“We got it, you and Will both got on the podium. P3 for Will, he held off Zhang amazingly. I’ll see you on the podium, you’ve got some burnouts to do.”
“It’s a date.”
His radio clicks silent and Percy sticks a hand out of his car and signals to Jason Grace and Will Solace that they’ve been given the go-ahead for burnouts. He gets two thumbs up in response and immediately turns his car while hitting the break. Smoke goes up around him and he giggles, despite being a fully grown man. He giggles because he’s doing burnouts once again as the world champion and it’s the best feeling to have won this way, to have fought the whole season and have an actual competitor this year. He’s got no doubt in his mind Jason will be the one on the top step next year, Jupiter really challenged them and he’s a strong driver.
But not strong enough this year. This year, it’s Percy on top again. Percy who gets to walk out last and stand on that top step of the podium with Annabeth on the constructors podium.
They hear their anthems play, a sense of pride for both of them, and Percy stand straighter than he ever has in his life, still can’t believe he pulled off this Herculean task, but it’s real. It’s real, and his mom is in the crowd, crying happy tears as she holds his sister and leans into Paul, and his dad isn’t far away, eyes also wet with tears. It’s real and Annabeth is right there, just out of reach on her own podium, but looking at him with eyes full of pride and love.
And then it’s time for the champagne.
The anthems end and Percy can see Will putting down his trophy, switching it out for the champagne bottle at his feet that he starts to shake before slamming it on the ground, causing an eruption of champagne to flow out.
Percy grabs his own bottle, aiming the spray at his teammate as he gets doused from all sides, Annabeth joining the fray as well.
Jason’s good naturedly spraying all three members of the Delphi Racing team, his smile not quite reaching his eyes, but Percy knows from the cool down room that Jason had done everything he could, Percy was just better this race. So Jason sprays them, celebrates his P2 finish in the race and championship standings, having just edged out Will over the season.
Percy’s pulled out of his head by a shower of champagne down his back, Annabeth’s laughter right in his ear as she upends her bottle down the back of his race suit.
“Oh it’s on, Chase,” he says, shaking his bottle a little more before dumping it over her head, saturating her blonde curls in champagne.
“Percy!” she squeals, sputtering as the champagne runs down her face. “Oh my god, I’m gonna look crazy for the photos now.”
“You still look fine, you used waterproof makeup earlier,” he reminds her, arms slowly wrapping around her. “Now, I believe you owe me something,” he says, lips turning up into a smirk.
Annabeth rolls her eyes at his dramatic approach, but lets herself be tugged closer to Percy. “You’ve certainly fulfilled your end of the bargain,” she says, reaching to cup Percy’s cheek in her hand.
He can’t even think of anything to say in response, so he just crashes his lips onto hers, fulfilling a promise made at the start of the season.
“Win another championship for me, and the I’ll kiss you on the podium Seaweed Brain,” was the ultimatum Annabeth gave him during the first race weekend, when Percy whined about another season of keeping their relationship under wraps. And win he did.
It’s not their best kiss, Percy pressing hard into Annabeth, gripping her to him as they balance on the podium together, nearly empty bottles of champagne in hand, most of the liquid sprayed on the ground around them or clinging to their clothes.
No, it’s not the late night or early morning kisses shared on the beach, a kiss shared in his driver room before a race, or one behind their motorhome afterwards. It’s not filled with finesse, but it’s special because it’s one that tastes like champagne and winning and not hiding anymore. After six years, Percy can kiss Annabeth in public on purpose and not worry about the repercussions.
“Spray the lovebirds! They need to cool off!” Percy hears Will yell, feels the champagne spraying him. He wraps his arms more securely around Annabeth, poorly attempting to shield her from the onslaught of champagne.
“Took you long enough, Jackson!” Jason yells from the other side, also spraying them.
“Oh come on!” he protests, glaring at Jason over Annabeth’s shpulder. “We had our reasons!”
“Yeah, and yet almost the entire grid knew anyways! Worst kept secret,” Will throws back.
“And yet, you all helped us keep it from anyone outside of the grid. I’d say best kept secret,” Annabeth retorts, raising an eyebrow at her other driver.
“Touché.”
“And now the secrets out,” Percy murmurs to Annabeth, drawing her attention back to him.
“Secrets out,” she confirms, smiling up at him, grey eyes sparkling. “What are you gonna do about it, Jackson?”
He doesn’t respond this time, just drops his champagne bottle to more firmly wrap his arms around Annabeth, hands splayed across her back as he pulls her in again and kisses her. Their lips pressed together, he dips her, arching her back as he smiles against her lips, the happiest he’s ever been.
Percy lets out a breath when he pulls back, this one steady when hours before it had been shaky. He smiles down at Annabeth, presses one more quick kiss to her lips before standing her up straight again.
He’s a five-time world champion. His team are five-time constructors champions. He’s dating the woman he’s had a crush on for longer than he probably realized and got to kiss her on the podium under a champagne shower. He’s got a pretty good life.
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scrollll · 1 year ago
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Okay, I know, we're all absolutely ready, have our clipboards with notes and the blackboard with pictures, threads and theories that make Kim Theerapanyakun's look like a damn kids' game board to go completely all in with the analysis again.
But here I ask for a brief pause to honor what a fiercely good job the actors have done for this series.
Seriously, my examples of this are endless. Of course, probably the most obvious, the many smut-scenes. It takes a lot to allow that level of trust and professionalism to become so intimate with not just one but multiple acting partners.
What I particularly love is that so far none of the sex scenes or general hot scenes have been "just sex". In each one you could see what was going on inside the characters.
You could see Soong's hesitation, the moment when he ignored his own preferences in order to please others and the emotions that built up bit by bit, First's joyful anticipation of finally being able to live out his fantasies and his urge to go further.
Zouey's hesitation, alternating with moments in which he tries to rise above himself, Teena's way in which he first tries to put on a show, only to fall for Zouey after all.
Nont's microexpressions, every time he's near Prom, the fear, the determination, at the same time the lust and tension.
Jump almost willingly throwing himself into Porsche's clutches, kneeling and showing himself submissive, but just waiting to be more deeply involved with Porsche...
The individual examples are endless, and truly insane.
Secondly, the intensity with which the actors prepared for the roles. At this point, I'd like to mention the Playboy actors in particular.
The actor from Teena said in an interview that the weight loss and training had presented him with enormous challenges. There were days when he didn't have enough energy to go to the gym or even lift a weight because of his diet.
Again, guys, the bodies we see don't come naturally. To be able to see a six-pack, the water balance in the body has to be extremely low. And the total body fat percentage must be between 13 and 6%. I'll leave the math to you, but as a spoiler, that's pretty damn low.
Third, the acting in general, not just in the nc scenes.
For example, the friendship between Captain, Zouey, First and Porsche, our pampered gang of the privileged.
I love their scenes together, not because I think their friendship is flawless and great, but because it feels real to me. I like seeing how they interact and how their actions and consequences affect each other.
There are many roles in Playboyy and yet none of them feel like a repetition of another already existing role. The characters are different, different written and different brought to life by the actors.
Every character has their own depth, their own characteristics, goals, motivations, abysses and things they are prepared to sacrifice.
Anyway, these people put a hell of a lot of work into this series and with every new episode I'm left speechless as to how the hell they managed to pull off scenes like this in front of a team of I don't know how many people.
Okay, I can't go on for very long here and I invite everyone to do so. There's so much hate for so many shows and things right now, so let's enjoy some stuff that's just really awesome:)
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bi-bard · 2 years ago
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I Know that I've Asked it Before but Please Let the Scale Tip Here in My Favor - Arthur Shelby Imagine [Peaky Blinders]
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Title: I Know that I've Asked it Before but Please Let the Scale Tip Here in My Favor
Characters: Arthur Shelby, Child!Reader [about 10]
Based On: Aperture
Word Count: 1,337 words
Warning(s): homelessness, mention of death/violence
Summary: Arthur finds a kid hiding in the shadows of an alley. He never thought that a single act of kindness could lead to anything bigger than that. And yet, he finds himself hoping that he doesn't screw everything up in the long run.
Author's Note: The amount of math that I had to do in order for this story to work... oh my god.
Part Two of "July" [Release Date: 7/26/2023]
Part Three of "July" [Release Date: 7/28/2023]
YEARBOOK - SLEEPING AT LAST WRITING CHALLENGE MASTERLIST
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Misfortune seemed to trace the streets of Birmingham.
Those that seemed to escape such a path were only focused on the conditions of those less fortunate than them when it was convenient. Not much different than most places in the world, but that didn't make it much better.
(Y/n) hadn't been merely caught by the path of misfortune; they had been born in it. There was little hope of them getting out of that circle. It was a fact that they had been all too aware of since they could comprehend the world around them. That little hope only got squashed further when they were suddenly left completely alone.
They were young, but they felt as if they were nothing more than an infant when their mother leaves them behind for the first time.
It was cold. (Y/n) tried to be grateful that it wasn't raining, but that did nothing to stop the chill creeping through their jacket that was close to falling apart.
They were curled up in a corner, knees as close to their chest as possible. They wanted to close their eyes and relax, but they couldn't. They couldn't let themself be so vulnerable.
"Hey!"
(Y/n) almost jumped out of their skin when they heard someone shout. They looked up to see a man some distance away, looking at them. Fearing the worst, as they had learned to, (Y/n) let one hand move slowly, going for the shard of glass that would have to work until they could get their hands on a real weapon.
"What are you doing down here," the man asked, starting to walk closer. "Go home!"
(Y/n) didn't respond, instead sticking out their arm as the man moved. The man looked down at the piece of glass. (Y/n) could have sworn that he scoffed.
"Come on, you can't sit here, you're gonna scare away business," the man insisted. "Go."
"No."
"Excuse me? It wasn't a suggestion, kid. Go home."
"No."
"Listen, kid. I don't care what your parents did that was so fucking unfair that you wanted to hide out here, but I can't have a fucking kid hiding out here. You have to go."
"I can't."
"Your legs aren't broken."
"I don't have anywhere else to go!"
The man's eyebrows furrowed. "Where are your parents?"
"I only had my mom." (Y/n) never wanted to disclose this much of their personal history to some stranger, but they didn't have much of a choice now. "She got sick. They wouldn't even let me see her before she died!"
The man paused.
(Y/n) could see the gears in his head moving. They wanted to know what he was thinking. They wanted to understand the paths that his thoughts went along. All they could do in that moment was hold on a little tighter to the broken bottle.
"Come on," the man muttered, nodding toward the building. (Y/n) didn't move. The man turned around again. "You want some food or not?"
"Why should I trust you?"
"Fine, stay out here-"
"Wait!" (Y/n) scrambled from their place on the ground. They shoved their broken bottle into their jacket just in case. "Who are you?"
"Name's Arthur Shelby."
That made (Y/n) fight the urge to freeze where they were. Of course, they knew who the Shelbys were. Only a fool wouldn't.
"Come on," he held the door to the pub open so (Y/n) could walk inside. They were directed to a small room in the corner. "Wait there."
"I'm (Y/n)," they called just before he could step out. "(Y/n) (Y/l/n)."
"Don't really need to know, kid," Arthur shrugged before stepping back outside.
(Y/n) sat at the small table. They were silent, taking the time to take in the appearance of the room. There were three walls separate from the two that were shared with the outside of the building. There was this fogged glass in the potential windows.
(Y/n) wondered about the purpose of the room. The reputation of the Peaky Blinders caused a thousand ideas to cross (Y/n)'s mind. All of them were what one would expect from a child who had only heard stories from their parents. Like the Boogeyman.
Arthur came back a little while later and set a bowl and a spoon were placed in front of (Y/n).
There were a few minutes before (Y/n) grabbed the spoon and dragged the bowl over to them.
"How long have you been on the street," Arthur asked.
"A few months," (Y/n) confessed between bites of food.
"Months?"
They nodded to him. "Hasn't been so bad. Most people feel bad for a little kid on the streets."
"You had a broken bottle as a weapon-"
"I said most, not all. Some people see a kid as an easy target."
Arthur took a deep breath and let the kid eat without another interruption. Much like he had been outside, he was running through all of the choices he had.
He could let this be a singular act of kindness. Shove the kid out after they were done, tell them to never look at or for him and to never tell anyone else about that day, and finally go on about his life.
Or he could help. He could help the little kid that had been curled up in the alley. The kid with no future, no one waiting for them, and nothing to lose other than their life. Arthur knew the cruelty of this city. Hell, he was a reason why it was so cruel.
A heavy sigh escaped him as the kid finally set down the spoon. "You got a place to go? Anywhere at all?"
The kid shook their head.
"Any family at all?"
Again, the kid shook their head. "My mom ran to Birmingham to find a new life. A better life. She left everyone else behind and wouldn't tell me where they were."
There was a long pause. "You'll stay with me."
"Why," the kid asked.
"Because you'll get killed out there. Very least I can do is teach you how to fight."
"You want me to stay and learn from the Peaky Blinders?"
"Yeah, sure, call it that."
"Does that mean that I'm part of the gang?!"
"Woah, woah, calm down," Arthur motioned for the kid to bring down their obvious excitement. "I never said that and don't go around saying that I did. I am making sure that you don't get yourself murdered, got it?"
"Got it!"
"Good. Make sure you're finished. We're leaving as soon as I get back."
Arthur made it seem like he was stepping out to talk to someone important. Instead, he was stepping out to figure out when his mouth had decided to run so far ahead of his brain.
He had no right dragging this kid into this life. They would better off if he had told them to run off.
Arthur was a mess. He never wanted to speak about it, but it doesn't mean that he never recognized it. Beyond just his work with the Peaky Blinders, he had a host of problems that would likely do nothing other than ruin this kid's life.
But now, he had promised to protect this kid for some unknown period of time.
It was mad. Every moment of it.
If he had watched someone like him do this, he'd laugh in their face.
An idiot. That's what he was.
However, even if he was entirely aware of such a fact, he couldn't stop it. All he could do was stand there and think of the thousand ways that this could all go wrong.
Arthur closed his eyes for a moment. No one would call him a holy man, by any means, but that wouldn't stop him from trying.
He pleaded for a little mercy. Not for him or his actions, but for (Y/n). For their sake. Their future. Their life.
The chances felt slim. Impossible, even. But he still tried.
He stood there and begged to not mess this up... not completely, at least.
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Navigation Guide
What I Write For
Some Original Characters
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odysseywritings · 8 months ago
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Mutter
A boy had his first taste of adolescence when he had the sinking fear that death was all too real after hearing the news of two grandparents gone in a flash. Before turning 13, his belief of an afterlife seemed childish, and the neverending pit in his gut about floating in The Black for eternity with no joy ever returning. And then having to come back to middle school after the summer.
Mark Matos went from an adventurous explorer to a closed off boy to classmates over the months. There weren't any friends who gave him support and he shuffled on like a new person. In his zombified state he would hardly utter a word unless prompted, giving his math teacher the charming nickname of Mark Mutters for the whole year. He was too tired to fight it at the beginning.
His family, splintered by personal and financial issues, didn't know how deep this death fear descended in his mind. The primordial reptilian death drive having a quick elevator ride to the floor filled with file cabinets of social etiquette. To not cause more problems and pain. Suffering alone was better than risking others to suffer as well.
Some days were better than others, where he could stop the flood with material meant to turn boys into men when childhood felt fleeting every day. Attempts for new friends were his biggest challenge, moreso than homework, and nothing painted a bigger target on a boy than being small and alone. He was too small to be a great fighter, too slow to be a social butterfly, too scatterbrained to be a scholar. His talent was staying hidden when he wasn't bullied, and school still lagged in the undercover agent classes.
More than talent, he wanted company. A reliable older mentor to guide him through challenges. A group of friends to feel secure and confident in himself. Attention from girls that made him feel like a somebody. But being alone wasn't a call to action for a compassionate hero like in a sentimental movie. It was a sign that his mind was drifting further away from his peers and all the paths they could lead to. All the people they would lead to.
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driftward · 2 years ago
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.relaxing
As the last echo faded away, Zoissette felt her muscles go slack, her mind go quiet, and the world go away.
Somehow, she knew this was it.
She had pushed as far as she could go. Lavender and her had traversed the rift, and the end of their journey was coming soon.
The had never quite made it to the thirteenth, never made it to any of the other shards, but that was alright. They had stayed together, stuck with one another, braved new places, traveled through strange worlds, been sifted by memory and challenged by doubt, and at the end, were still themselves.
They had been tried and tested and found to be true.
That would have to be more than enough.
grounded
Meya washed up by the sink, cleaning up after having brought sandwiches and drinks for the hardworking science crew. They were tired, and they were cranky, and Meya understood that, so she made sure to stop by frequently, and help out in any way she could, which in this case meant making sure they were being fed adequately.
While she was cleaning up, she heard a link come in over someone's pearl. Curious for any news, she turned her head slightly to listen.
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"That was Archon Y'shtola," said Ryssthota. "She says she's got a way to find them, and wants to know if we can get the laboratory operational."
"You're joking," said Riven, hands on her hips as she glared up at Ryssthota. "Cait Sith installed the new nullstone only this morning, Apple only just got the nuolith array repaired, and we still can't get half of this equipment to run without a safety system shutting it down again!"
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Meya only half-listened to Ryss and Riven's discussion - more of a rant, really - as her attention drifted to the laboratory's library. Judging from the state of the stacks, the sections on theory and experimentation had already been rifled through extensively while the science team tried to figure out exactly how Zoissette's device worked. Even beginning to figure that out was beyond Meya. However, she knew Zoissette. She would have extensive documentation available on every facet of the devices in the laboratory, from the equations and ideas behind it all to the simple instructions on how to operate it. She searched among the books until she found a section that had been overlooked. Procedure books. She opened one and flipped through it idly. No theory or math, no complex jargon beyond what Meya could decipher. Just step by step instructions. She spotted one labelled 'emergency recovery', and read it carefully.
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Once she was satisfied she understood it enough, she traced her fingers along the steps, and began to follow them, one by one. Behind her the other scientists continued to bemoan their troubles.
"...and her experimentation notes are impossible! She details initial conditions, but not how to achieve them!" "Well, she probably assumed anyone following along would have their own setup and would know how to work it." "Fat lot of good that does us, we need to know how to work HER setup!" Meya nodded to herself, as she reset several systems, adjusting dials and knobs according to instruction.
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She stood up, and looked up into an area of the machine she would find difficult to get to. Fortunately, Apple was already wedged in there, making adjustments. "Apple?" "Oh, hello Meya! Thanks for the sandwiches, I really appreciate it. Hey, whatcha got there?" Meya smiled up at Apple, and showed her the procedure book. "My pleasure. Would you happen to be able to adjust the nuolith array to these settings?" "Oh, sure, bring that closer, would you, let me just take a look... yeah, hang on."
Meya waited patiently while Apple snaked her arms up further into the device, fiddling with something or another.
"Huh. Slight negative flow to begin with. Wouldn't have expected that, but it looks like that made the overflow valves finally reset. That's kind of a relief, actually, that was giving me real trouble. Got anything else you need me to do?" "No, thank you Apple, that will be all. ...are you okay up there?"
"Oh yeah. I'm the smallest of the regular science team, so I'm pretty used to having to climb into places like this. Don't worry about me."
"Well, okay," said Meya, smiling at Apple. "I'm going to keep going if that's alright."
"Oh, sure, it's probably fine. Good luck."
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Meya was no longer paying attention to the ranting behind her as she traced the last few steps in the procedure, carefully manipulating computer settings in the Allagan interface. She was not familiar with it entirely, but the procedure had alternative instructions that led her to interact with it through her tomephone. Soon enough, she was at the last step. A system wide reset. She checked over the instructions one last time, making sure she had followed them all diligently, and with a nod to herself, hit the execute button.
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The laboratory went dark with a reverberation of loud thuds from various pieces of equipment.
The ranting stopped immediately, as the others - save Apple - looked around, suddenly worried. Ryssthota swore something to the Navigator, while Riven gasped.
Meya considered that next time, she should maybe warn them, but this time, she just watched calmly, counting down silently in her head.
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Equipment vibrated. Aether flowed. The sounds of electronics coming to life hummed through the space while holographic panels glowed in the air.
Ryssthota and Riven looked around, dumbfounded.
Meya tucked the book away, and turned around, crossing her arms and suddenly feeling a bit self-conscious. She wanted her friend back, and what she had done seemed to work. She hoped it had worked.
"Does that help?" she asked.
23 notes · View notes
eldritchaccident · 1 year ago
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Timing: Current Location: A bar in Wormrow Feat: @mortemoppetere & @eldritchaccident Warning: alcoholism tw, discussions of parental death tw, sibling death tw, and child death tw, past domestic abuse tw, past emotional abuse tw Summary: Teddy said they'd find Emilio, That's what they do.
It was only the fifth bar they checked. First was the one where he was staying with Perro, second was a long shot, but it was nearby the first and maybe Emilio thought going to a clown themed dive bar would throw off his scent, but no. Wasn’t until the fifth did the ex-demon see the surly slayer slumped over a stool. Sulking into the last sip of some kind of drink. Probably whiskey. Probably not enough of it. 
Teddy walked up behind, signaling to the bartender (someone they actually knew for once) for a drink of their own, then another round for the man. “Come here often?” The hand hovered just above the hunter’s back, until it was clear that Emilio saw who it was. That the touch wouldn’t come as a surprise. “Shame to see such a handsome guy sitting all alone.” 
— 
His mind was spinning in circles, the conversation with Lucio fresh and painful as it played back on repeat. His mother was going to kill him. His uncle wanted to save him. His family was dead. The man responsible had done what he’d done in a desperate attempt to keep Emilio alive. What did it all say? What did it all mean? It felt like he was responsible, like he deserved to shoulder even more of the blame than he already had. He hadn’t thought it was possible for this to hurt worse than it had before; he was learning that he was wrong about a lot of things.
He heard footsteps behind him, and he didn’t have to turn around to know who was approaching. Teddy’s footfalls were as familiar as his own these days, a quiet comfort even in moments like this one, when he told himself he didn’t want to hear them. He wasn’t surprised they’d found him. They’d always been good at that. “Shame for who?” He mumbled, accent thick as his words slurred around the alcohol thrumming through him. “Better, I think. Less people get hurt.” He downed the rest of his drink as the bartender brought over another glass, leaning into Teddy’s touch just a little. “Sorry,” he said quietly. “Didn’t mean to scare you. Really. Think I… got lost.” Not physically. He thought Teddy would understand that much.
“Well, I found you.” Teddy swallowed through the sad smile, ignoring the first part. Emilio had a way of punching down whenever it involved himself. Teddy didn’t always know how to respond, only that they didn’t believe a single fucking word of it. Felt like they wanted to put a blanket over the fire. Help him simmer, help him be grounded. One day, they thought, they might even get him to stop believing he was the root of all evil. Just maybe. If he stuck around long enough to listen. 
“Glad I did, two people, a dog, an otter, and a really spoiled demon back home were startin’ to miss you. Whole lots.” Teddy had shot Wynne a text the moment they saw him. Said they’d text again when they were leaving for home. At this rate, might take a second or two of coaxing. 
“Gonna tell me how many you’ve had? Gotta do math now, to figure out how much I need to catch up. Can’t have another New Year's Eve.” Ted’s arm slid further, wrapping around the whole of his upper back and giving a quick tight squeeze before they sat on the stool at his side. As luck would have it, the bar was packed close, the chairs didn’t have much space between, and that made a perfect excuse to keep that contact. To rest their leg against his and let him soak in whatever warmth their body had to offer. Not that much, considering the walking and the snow. Getting him to go out through that was gonna be the real challenge. 
— 
“Always do,” he agreed softly. It was hard not to think about the night Teddy found him on the roof, when that damn necklace curse was coursing through his veins and driving him out of his mind. They hadn’t even been friends then, but Teddy had still known exactly what he’d needed. They’d still coaxed him down off the roof and into their tacky yellow car, still practically carried him back to their boat just to give him a moment’s reprieve. They were good at that. And what did Emilio give them in return? Days of worry eating away at their gut because he was too drunk to return a text message? Fuck knew they deserved better than that.
He swallowed, staring down at the bar and his hands on top of it. They kept flashing between what they were and what he remembered of them, going from normal to covered in blood every time he blinked his eyes. He squeezed them shut now, trying to block out an image that seemed stamped beneath his eyelids. “Think the demon might throw a parade if I didn’t come home,” he said flatly, chest aching. Wynne was worried, too. And Xó, and Perro, if dogs could worry. 
Teddy settled into the seat next to him, and Emilio shifted a little to make room before leaning back into them, finding comfort in the way their leg brushed against his. “Don’t want you to catch up,” he admitted quietly. They’d been so out of it on New Year’s. He didn’t want a repeat. He didn’t want them to say something they might regret when he wasn’t sober enough to pretend not to hear it. He was quiet for a moment. The bartender brought their drinks over, shot Emilio a wary look before turning to tend to someone else. He was probably making a mental count of how many he’d served the hunter already. Emilio was quiet a moment, staring at the new drink in front of him. With a shake inhale, he broke the silence. “He sold us out,” he admitted quietly. “My uncle. That’s how… what happened happened. He sold us out, and I put a knife in his gut. Thought he was dead. You know? Figured I killed him. Hoped I did. And that —” He cut himself off, picking up the glass and taking a long swig, draining half of it in a single go. “My dad died before I was old enough to know him. My uncle stepped in. Brought me up. Kept me alive. And I wish I’d killed him.” What did that say about him? What did that make him? He knew the answer. He knew it was nothing good. “He’s been looking for me since it happened. Wanted to tell me why.”
Cautious. That was the name of the game here. Emilio was staring at his palms like they were burning, so Teddy offered a pair of icy hands. Sliding one arm underneath his and worming its way to his where they could intertwine their fingers. Keeping the man grounded. Keeping him in time. Teddy could see him slipping away, the awful gnawing memories pulling him back through the years until the present and the past were twisting together as one. “Always will.” Another squeeze acted as the punctuation to the promise. As if to mark how serious they were. No matter where he went, no matter what was wrong, Teddy would do their best to find him. Always. 
“Eh, he acts like a prissy little baby sometimes, but I think Gabs actually likes having you around. Your clients come close enough that he gets a good deal of gossip just by being nearby.” Gabagool would never admit it, not in a million years. But Teddy had known the little gremlin long enough to know how he acted when he started to open up to someone. 
“That’ll make driving home easier.” Teddy wasn’t actually planning on catching up, but if that’s what the hunter had needed, they would’ve. In a heartbeat. They couldn’t remember too much from that night, only the cool of the waves crashing around their ankles. And the way the world felt too big, and them far too small. Was it the same, they wondered? For him? Ted listened, carefully, intently. Nodding along, letting the information sink in. Not an easy thing to settle on, even from an outsider’s perspective. 
“Was it–” Their first instinct was to finish the thought for him, but the idea of getting it wrong and having him correct them somehow seemed worse. “Why did he do it?” 
— 
Teddy’s hands slid into his, and the world seemed to slot into place just a little bit more. Not quite enough to click, but enough to make things feel less unsteady. Emilio didn’t pull back, didn’t tense up. He let those fingers intertwine with his own, let his eyes settle on their hands and then slide up their arm. The jacket they wore was a familiar one, he realized; Emilio hadn’t realized he’d left the house without it. It was the one he wore most often, all worn leather and heavy pockets. He thought it looked good on them. His eyes lingered for a moment before darting up to their face. “Maybe you shouldn’t make that promise,” he said quietly, thinking of what Rhett had said. You’d be better off not caring. And Teddy would be, too.
But they’d been right, what they’d said to him. They got to choose who they cared about, and they’d chosen him. For better or worse, they wanted this, and Emilio was too selfish to pull away. “I’ll tell him you said that,” he said, trying to make a joke that his tone couldn’t quite sell. “I’m sure he’ll have things to say.” 
He looked away again, focusing back on the half-empty glass of whiskey on the bar. “You don’t have to take me home, you know.” He probably deserved to make the trek himself, to go out in the snow and walk. It’d sober him up, at least, even if he’d hate it all the while. It would be karmic, wouldn’t it? He’d made them walk around in the harsh Maine winter for quite a while, based on how cold their hands were. And… he probably deserved it for more than that, too.
He swallowed, picking up his glass again with the hand not gripping Teddy’s. He tilted it, let the liquid inside swirl. “I was going to leave,” he said quietly, barely a whisper. “With my — With Flora. I didn’t want… She wasn’t built for it. Hunting. I didn’t want to bring her up like that. So I — I was going to take her, and I was going to go. I never told anyone, but… My sister found out. And she told my mom, and…” He trailed off, squeezing his eyes shut again. He thought of the messages he’d sent Teddy just after reconnecting. How did you learn to be okay with what your parents wanted for you? How could anyone?
“Maybe I should, especially because you don’t want me to.” Stubborn ass. Teddy smiled fondly, in spite of everything. A warmth in their chest was spreading farther and faster than the sip of alcohol would’ve done on its own. No, it was him. It was always him. “Eh, Gabagool probably already knows. You wouldn’t think it talking to him, but he knows everyone’s business. It’s part of what he is. Still sticks around us though.” That one came with a little elbow jab, an obvious nod to the current conversation. 
Dark eyes found his fingers, looked at the scars, at the callouses. The marks the world left, and the evidence of the marks he left on the world. If Emilio wanted something he worked and worked and worked until it was done, or he collapsed. Emilio gave and gave himself until there was nothing left. He felt more deeply every day than most people would in their entire lives. And he always, always, always took the blame. 
Teddy’s thumb traced along the lines of his hand, noting how soft they were. Despite everything. These hands held life. Purpose. Resolve. The hands that held his daughter, carried her, even now. Even when a body, far too small, lay resting somewhere far away. Teddy couldn’t imagine how that must have felt. Worse, they couldn’t possibly conceive of how Elena Cortez thought that taking those hands away would do the kid any good. But that was just it, wasn’t it? She didn’t want a kid. Didn’t want a small ray of sunshine, with Emilio’s nose and a too bright smile. 
Their spit soured, their free hand pushed away the remains of their glass along with enough cash for any open tab on the bar. Teddy swiveled in their chair and forced Emilio to do the same. Until they were facing him, until they could stand and throw their arms around him. There were no words for the desperate selfishness that broke Emilio’s world. The weight it put on his shoulders was immense.  It wasn’t his, it was never supposed to be his to carry. But her choice to make a weapon from a child, then expect that weapon to do the same to another… That was the stone that caused the avalanche. 
“I’m sorry, Em. I’m so sorry.” 
“You always going to do the opposite of what I say?” Despite the heaviness that clung to him, there was an undeniable fondness to his tone. In the privacy of his own mind, he couldn’t deny what he felt here. He couldn’t turn it into something smaller, couldn’t force it to sit in the palm of his hand. Teddy would always do the opposite of what Emilio told them to do, and Emilio would always feel warm at the sight of them, anyway. He would always feel these too-big feelings, always have this heart that was too big for his chest. He wondered if they knew. Then, he wondered how they couldn’t. Was it even possible to miss the way it was beating for them? “I think it’s you he’s sticking around.” Because who wouldn’t? The idea that anyone had ever looked at Teddy and decided to leave felt laughable. How could anyone be so stupid?
Their thumb rubbed absently at his hands, and he felt more here than he had since Lucio’s voice first rang through that empty apartment. Like there was an anchor holding him firmly in place, keeping him from drifting out to sea the way he always seemed to do. 
They turned, and Emilio would have turned with them even without prompting, would have followed them like a dog, would have revolved around them like a moon pulled in by their gravity. He’d revolve around them for as long as he was allowed to, until some errant asteroid came and knocked him from orbit, broke him into a billion little pieces. They threw their arms around him, and Emilio melted into an embrace he knew he didn’t deserve, let it swallow him up despite knowing that there were better people for them to wrap their arms around. His throat felt dry, stung in a way he knew and hated. That was the problem with drinking to solve your problems, he thought; it only made things numb until it didn’t. 
His face felt hot; he knew if he could see it, it would be red. He knew his eyes were wetter than he wanted them to be, tried to discreetly hide it without outing himself to Teddy, without letting them know. “I should have been faster,” he mumbled, muffled where he was pressed against them. “If I’d gotten her out sooner, it wouldn’t — It’s my fault. All of it. It happened because of me.”
“Nah, then you’d get used to it.” Teddy had smirked, without realizing they were already starting to feel like they were back home. Didn’t matter that it was miles away. They found it right there. On the bar stool, waiting for them to show up. They had been around the world, seen sunsets on every beach from Alaska to Australia, the long way. They’d seen the way the Earth’s crust splits at the very depths of her seas, seen the way mountains bended to magic at the whims of being far more powerful than themself. But nothing carried the weight, the comfort, or the contentment that sitting next to him did. There was a reason they had pulled that old leather jacket on, the moment they noticed it still sitting in Emilio’s room. 
It had everything to do with the face before them. With the heart and mind that sat inside. With the fact that they knew the words were going to come out of his mouth long before the silence broke. 
Teddy pulled themself in tighter, hooked their chin around his shoulder and tried to chase the awful undeserved guilt away by squeezing harder. They wanted to push out the shame, the weary woes, the certainty that if he had just done things better that they would have been different. They didn’t know how to do it. Didn’t know the right words to get him to see from their perspective. 
“Shit happens, Emilio. Awful, terrible, wretched things. It– Even if you were a damn olympian, it wouldn’t have changed anything. Your mom–” A touchy subject. One Teddy knew Emilio didn’t like to talk about on the best of days and here they were bringing her up at about the worst time possible. “She trained them all, didn’t she? She did the same shit that she did to you, to every one of them, and they still didn’t make it out. It’s not about who's better or who is worse.” Their voice was low, they were still in public after all. But they did their best to pull him away from the few other patrons. Walk their hug closer to a corner. Closer to privacy. They shifted to Spanish too, not that it was uncommon for folks in Maine to be fluent, but it felt more personal all the same.  
“Everyone– She did what she thought was best and, let me be clear, she was wrong. Dead fucking wrong. You were right to try and leave. I think– some part of you understands that it’s not right. Turning kids into soldiers. Your uncle too. Sounds like– Everyone had their best intentions. And sometimes that works out, and sometimes it’s a fucking disaster. But that doesn’t change that the only blame belongs to the people who did the killing. The ones who chose to enact that violence.” Teddy swallowed hard, unsure how much of this would sink in, if any. Or if it was just gonna start another fight. They didn’t want to fight anything but the demons plaguing Emilio’s past. And now they had a name. They couldn’t quell the fire that stoked at the mention of his mother, couldn’t stop the rage at Elena Cortez for ever thinking Emilio was anything but a good man, a good son, and a good father. 
“You aren’t the problem here, you were a victim.” 
— 
“I don’t think there is any getting used to this,” he admitted quietly. The flutter in his chest, the way the world shifted on its axis the moment Teddy walked into a goddamn room… There was no growing accustomed to it. It wasn’t the kind of thing that would ever grow mundane, ever become commonplace. Teddy Jones took a breath, and the universe adjusted to their presence. What could Emilio do but shift to adjust along with it? What other choice did he have? The earth revolved around the sun, the moon revolved around the earth, and he revolved around them. It was basic, unavoidable, expected. To take any one thing out of that equation was to bring on an apocalypse no one was prepared to deal with.
He wondered what it looked like from the outside, the two of them clinging to one another in that seedy bar. It was funny, the things people failed to notice. Emilio had seen the world end a thousand times over, and he always seemed to be the only person aware of the carnage. This time, though… This time, Teddy was here in the thick of it. Watching the sea boil, watching the sun burn out. He didn’t know if it was better or worse. Somehow, both answers felt selfish.
“I ran,” he admitted quietly, two words like ash in his mouth. Drying it out, strangling him. He repeated them in hopes of chasing the taste away, but the feeling stayed. “I ran. That’s why I’m alive. They died because they fought, and I lived because I ran. I was the worst of them, Teddy. The worst.” His mother had said so herself, hadn’t she? A thousand times before. Rosa was faster, Victor was stronger, Edgar was smarter. And what was Emilio? The only thing he’d ever brought to the table had been a little girl with small hands he couldn’t bear to carve into weapons. Was it any wonder that Elena would have sacrificed him to keep her?
Teddy shifted into Spanish, and Emilio didn’t realize how much it meant to him until the relief nearly knocked him off his feet. He listened and understood, tired mind grateful not to have to translate every word into something that made more sense. “I should have done more,” he said quietly, choking on the words like they were a tangible thing. “How do I make up for not doing more? How do I make it matter? He — They died because someone wanted me safe. They’re gone because he wanted me alive. I don’t know how to carry that weight. I don’t know how to make it mean something.” He wished, with a bitter vengeance, that Lucio hadn’t done what he’d done. It would have been better to let the chips fall where they were meant to fall, to let things play out as they were supposed to. If Lucio had known how things would turn out, would he have done it differently? Would he have sacrificed Emilio to save Rosa and Edgar? To save Flora? Emilio couldn’t imagine the answer to be anything other than a resounding yes. He’d never been worth as much as his siblings, couldn’t begin to compare to something as precious as his daughter.
But Teddy thought differently.
Teddy spoke as if it were a matter of fact, as if things were simple. They sounded so sure, that part of Emilio wanted to believe them. Could it be true, he wondered? Could something be both violence and victim at once? No one mourned a broken blade, but Teddy spoke to him like he mattered. Like his grief meant something, even if it was born of cowardice. If he was a victim, what of Flora? What of Jaime? What of Rosa, of Edgar, of Victor and Juliana? The dead were there to be mourned and buried, but what could you do for the living? What was left? 
He swallowed, clinging to them tighter than he would have admitted. “We can go home,” he said quietly. “If you want to, we can go home now.”
“It’s alright, agapitós, it’s gonna be alright.” Barely above a whisper, if they hadn’t been pressed so close, there’s no way he would have heard it. But Teddy held fast. Unwilling, or maybe unable to let him go. Could have held him like that all night. Closing time be damned. Wasn’t quite that late yet. But the sentiment rang clearer than a bell. There wasn’t much, if anything, that was going to change Teddy’s mind. That was going to make them see him any differently. 
“You ran. It had to have been chaos. It’s not– that’s not a shame, Emilio. You survived. Your fear kept you alive. Maybe the reason every hunter seems to die before they hit forty is because they have fear beaten out of them. Because they’re told that they’re gonna die, that they have to die for some noble cause, so they go out and do that.” Teddy still wasn’t talking much above a whisper, and they were thankful for that because any louder and their voice might have cracked. Any more distant and he might have seen how their eyes welled up with tears, how their heart broke for everyone who died that day. “Fear is the part of you that wants to keep you safe, and that’s not a bad thing.” 
A ragged breath bounced off of Emilio’s back. Their hand cradled the back of his head while their own pressed against his temple. “They died because someone told them it was better to face an impossible enemy than to retreat, to fight another day. To wait until it was safe. They died because of what your mother turned them into. If– If anyone is at fault, that’s who. I– I know it’s not an easy thing to hear, I know you don’t think it’s the same, but Emilio. It is. My parents tried to use me to get what they wanted. Tried to kill me so they could have something they saw as valuable without question. She may have dressed it up as a noble cause, but your mother did the same thing with you. Your siblings. Tried to do the same with Flora. She could have easily told everyone to run. She should have told people to run when her first son died. Should’ve– Before then even, fuck. Em, I–” Another breath. This one, long and low. Rising up from some deep pit and easing away like a bad dream. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Words don’t make this better. I know. I’m sorry.” 
Their stomach was in knots, they could only imagine how his wormed and rooted itself inside the empty cavern of his chest. Both too full, and too empty all the same. 
“Yeah, we should go home. Let’s go home okay?” 
Was it alright? Could it be? Everything seemed so goddamn heavy that the very notion of ‘alright’ seemed like a foreign thing, like a word he wasn’t equipped to understand. But Teddy was holding him, and the world was shifting, and it was a little better than it had been before they’d stepped into this bar. He felt closer to okay than he had before, even knowing it would only be a temporary thing. There was still Lucio to deal with. There was still some decision to be made. But he didn't have to make it tonight.
“Sometimes I think I didn’t,” he admitted quietly. It wasn’t a new confession. He felt more dead than he did alive, some days. He’d said as much to Lucio that day in his apartment, spat it like venom in his uncle’s face. He hadn’t been saved that day in Mexico, hadn’t been spared. Rhett peeled him off the forest floor, kept him from bleeding out in that small clearing, but it hadn’t been a rescue. It had been more of an embalming — the preservation of a thing already dead. “It feels like a bad thing. It feels — Sometimes, I think it’s the worst thing I’ve ever done. Surviving.” Was it a sin? His family had spent generations ridding the world of things that hadn’t died correctly. Wasn’t that what Emilio was now, too? 
He leaned in to Teddy a little more, selfish as he ever was. There was an ache in him, a great divide. He wanted to believe what they were saying, to absolve himself of some great sin, but how could he if doing so meant questioning a truth he’d been raised to accept all his life? His mother had been a monument. Who was he to tear it down? Protests lived and died behind his eyes, insistences that it wasn’t the same rising up in his throat and getting caught behind his teeth. Teddy’s parents had been willing to sacrifice a child, a toddler who’d done nothing wrong. Emilio’s mother had only wanted to rid herself of a persistent problem. Teddy’s parents were wrong and bad and it was easy to think so. It was so much harder to accuse Elena Cortez of such things. Even now, even with her body decaying a country away, it seemed blasphemous to think it.
More blasphemous still, he didn’t correct Teddy for saying it. He didn’t tell them they were wrong, even if he still thought they were. He told himself it was just because he was tired, because he knew it would spark an argument, because Teddy was stubborn when they thought they were right and they certainly thought they were now. He didn’t know if he believed it. He didn’t know what he believed at all anymore.
He let his head drop against their shoulder, nodding once. “Yeah,” he mumbled. “Yeah. Home sounds good. I wanna go home.” 
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bookaddict24-7 · 11 months ago
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REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!
EVERY WEEK I WILL POST VARIOUS REVIEWS I’VE WRITTEN SO FAR IN 2024. YOU CAN CHECK OUT MY GOODREADS FOR MORE UP-TO-DATE REVIEWS HERE.
___
119. Delinquent Daddy & Tender Teacher, Vol. 2 by Tama Mizuki--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
The way this series has a chokehold on me. The adorable little kid? The heartwarming relationship between the characters? The slowly increasing seriousness of their relationship? Please, this is both the cutest and sweetest series.
This was also surprisingly...spicy? I was not expecting that LOL.
I also thought the way Mizuki marked the passing of time by seasons was really smart and well-done. It also helped set the pace of the relationship between the two MCs.
I can't believe we only have three volumes out physically in North America 🙃
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120. Delinquent Daddy & Tender Teacher, Vol. 3 by Tama Mizuki--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Omg I love seeing the jealousy in this one because it helps bring to light some of the insecurities so the main couple can have solid communication about it all. I love these two because even though they get frustrated or hurt, they always manage to talk things out. I also loved the introduction of another set of characters and a new situation that proves to both be challenging for the little one, but also a chance to further showcase how much these characters care for each other.
I do like that one of them, despite his fears, was able to set his boundaries so well. I think that was pretty well done, as opposed to a few other storylines I've seen where everything happens so quickly and it's like boundaries don't even exist or matter.
I honestly need more. I want to devour everything this author brings us with this series.
___
121. Murder Road by Simone St. James--⭐️⭐️⭐️
While Simone St. James is definitely an auto-read for me (I still haven't read her older stuff, but don't judge me too much, please), sometimes her books can really be a hit or miss.
MURDER ROAD is a story that kind of sits in the middle for me. It was...okay? And I kind of wanted it to end by the time I reached around the 70% mark. The mystery itself was intriguing and I loved that twist of this being set in the 90s (those comments about Princess Diana and Kurt Cobain threw me the hell off and I kept thinking "Who's gonna tell her?"). The twists were good and so were each of the reveals.
The thing is that something about this book just...felt off to me. I think it was just very slowly paced. The story starts off strong and metaphorically punches the reader, but then it just kind of...enters this moment in the story where it's both frustrating and drags on a bit.
I'd still recommend this to thriller fans, since I can definitely see this grabbing a thriller addict's attention, but I do wish the book had kept that same energy of the beginning all the way through the book.
___
122. Deep Wizardry by Diane Duane--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I think DEEP WIZARDRY was better than the first book. While it still had some of the confusing magical math that the first book had, it wasn't as dense. We still got to see a lot of the magic at play, especially when the kids find themselves in a dangerous ocean.
This book also gave me heavy A WRINKLE IN TIME vibes. I think if this book was on today's book cases, it would be a pretty strong seller. It has the friendship goals of two young magicians, skeptical parents, and the wild adventures that kids are somehow surviving when we know in real life, adults wouldn't survive.
This also did have some creepy moments, especially when we meet some of the characters.
Okay, will be attacking book three soon!
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123. Dead Reckoning by Charlaine Harris--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I spoiled myself for who Sookie ends up with and while I was disappointed, I HAVE enjoyed seeing her navigate her relationships. DEAD RECKONING doesn't disappoint as we learn some truths about Sookie's relationship and the heartbreaking reality of her situation.
One of my favourite things about this series, now that I'm one step closer to finishing, is how much Sookie has grown as a character. Thinking of how she was in book one in comparison to her now is wild. Her naive nature has changed and she is much more aware of her humanity and fragility. She is also more aware of the people around her and how her actions affect those she loves.
This instalment also tackles a situation that has been brewing for several books and it had a very, very satisfying conclusion. I'm also now very curious about what's happening with a few certain people in Sookie's life.
I'm excited to get to the next book because I'm so, so close to the end!
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124. Stay Out of the Basement by R.L. Stine--⭐️⭐️⭐️
STAY OUT OF THE BASEMENT was entertaining for what it was--especially since the concept of plants becoming self-aware and actively trying to get humans is a creepy topic. The story itself was entertaining and less frustrating than other GOOSEBUMPS titles.
There is some language in this that are very reminiscent of the 90's blasé way of speaking. Calling a kid "Fatso" because she's skinny, and having that girl make her younger brother by one year sandwiches every time he was hungry were a couple of the things that threw me off. I don't even know how many times I asked myself "Doesn't this kid know how to make himself a peanut butter sandwich? She's eleven and he's ten..."
Anyway, another classic GOOSEBUMPS bites the dust.
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Have you read any of these books? What were your thoughts?
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Happy reading!
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