#full-blown beauty
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Title: Amaryllis/Crimson Red Beauty
That amaryllis is now Ready to bloom fully. Full-Blown Beauty is a reflection Of Ideal perfection in heaven As Plato mentions in the Book.
そのアマリリスがいま満開に。 鮮やかな真紅が目に眩しい。 それはプラトンが語った イデアの地上への転化。
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#amaryllis#crimson red#true beauty#beauty#full-blown beauty#ideal world#ideal#idealism#ideal perfection#plato#アマリリス#真紅#プラトン#イデア
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"He hadn’t realised how grey his life had been until Simon had come tumbling in in full technicolour, making everything feel brighter." ❤️ From Anywhere With You by @gulliblelemon. 💜
#young royals#wilmon#simon eriksson#wilhelm#prince wilhelm#my gifs yr#userbarrow#many many moons ago I was listening to Incubus and Here In My Room started playing and the lyrics instantly felt so Wilmon to me..#and this idea for a set came to mind except I had to learn new techniques.. so i left it in my list of future sets ☺️#and then I read Lemon's fic and she wrote that beautiful line and instantly it reminded of that set I wanted to make many moons ago..#so here we are lol#no one asked but just sharing my gif journeys.. 🙂#oh the lyrics if you are wondering are..#This party is old and uninvitingParticipants all in black and white#You enter in full blown technicolorNothing is the same after tonight#hello super Wilmon!!! 🥹#anyway go listen to that song so good and read lovely Lemon's fic because amazing!#also shout-out to Bee for listening to me and helping me when I get gif'ing turmoils! 💜💜#okay this got long lol be well out there! ☺️#youngroyalsedit#flashing gif
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the princess of what?
#mush art#holy fucking shit balls i am so peoud of this#look at it. its besutiful#mind blown#i made that#shitttttt im so happy its so good#shouout aloe for emotional support during the making#if i ever say i suck at drawing again send me this post#im so happy with it#its beautiful its art#sorry i just love it so much#LMAO im so full of myself idc isc i need to feel good sometimes and i do#PLEASE let me know what u think#voltron#vld#voltron legendary defender#allura#princess allura#allura of altea#voltron allura#vld allura#fanart#voltron fandom#voltron fanart#allura fanart#digital art#art
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Y’all don’t talk to me I will never emotionally recover from the latest bluey episode
#never ever has a episode of bluey driven me to tears#a few got close and I teared up at a few#but this one had me full blown ugly sobbing#bluey#bluey the sign#Joe Brum you beautiful fucking man how dare you
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There aren't enough toxic sunflower AUs. I need to make another one. I have so many ideas
#mostly very close-to-canon things; maybe even a post-canon AU thing#just. sunny's habit of ignoring all of his problems until they go away (they don't) and never addressing anything#vs. basil's overthinking and need for frequent reassurance because. beautiful prince disorder#neither of them communicating because. like.#to sunny even the THOUGHT of addressing a problem would freeze him right into place so he just. pretends it isnt there.#and basil would be like. but what if im bothering him by asking what if he gets upset with me for being needy or clingy or what if-#so neither of them ever communicate/say anything and i can just SEE basil fucking exploding in a full-blown psychotic meltdown from anxiety#they would be terrible for each other in every universe ❤#not even because either of them like. does bad things or gets mean or whatever. their issues just Match like that. to me#rant#omori#sunnflower
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this screams boyfriend material
#carlos sainz#holy shiiiiiiit#I’ve died#full blown death#he’s so handsome#and just beautiful#his face is literally perfect#thank you Ferrari for letting him go cause he gets Instagram back and it’s been beautiful#carlos sainz jr#scuderia ferrari#formula one#f1
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the cool thing about havifn an eating disorder is that even if you ostensibly recover the patterns and habits you developed when you were 12 will always be lurking at the back of your mind for you to access 👍
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You know……the same women who complain about beauty standards and the objectification of women, the ones who go on about how women in Hollywood are forced to adhere to impossible demands based on their looks by ~powerful men~ - are the same ones who will make accounts dedicated to praising the looks of female celebrities and kiss the floor these women walk on- these liberal women legitimately think they have NOTHING to do with upholding beauty standards and when it’s time to talk about it they’ll deflect and act like men are solely the ones upholding it, even though so many women tacitly promote it in some way shape or form.
As long as women are constantly given VALIDATION, MONEY, PRAISE, “LOVE” and STATUS, why would things even change and what’s stopping your average everyday women or young girls from pursuing that high that performing femininity grants women in society? They’ve seen how society ( including other women) value pretty women despite all the fake body positivity and will pursue it even if they’ve read some feminist talking points on how harmful the gender role of femininity (and might even repeat these points themselves like a broken record within it sincerity) because what they gain is worth it even at a price. Women have the power to make it out of the patriarchy but it’s not gonna happen if the patriarchal ideal of what a women should be is praised.
#ic.text#I’m so sick and tired of this type of hypocrisy#the ones who promote beauty standards are the average women with these accounts like I’m sorry but it’s wierd to have social media#dedicated to going ‘ wow pretty female celeb’ like men don’t really do this shit#when you step back and look at this behavior it’s just full blown female socialization#I will never understand this compulsive need to be obsessed or Stan women ( despite likening their works) for their looks#also you can blame men and their power influence all you want but women aren’t so helpless#ultimately the beauty/entertainment industry is a business#and if they aren’t loosing money from their imposing of beauty standards on women#why would they change especially when those same ‘feminists’ will go praise they results ??
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The China Syndrome (1979)
"I may be wrong, but I'd say you're lucky to be alive. For that matter, I think we might say the same for the rest of Southern California."
#the china syndrome#1979#american cinema#james bridges#t.s. cook#mike gray#jane fonda#jack lemmon#michael douglas#scott brady#james hampton#peter donat#wilford brimley#richard herd#daniel valdez#stan bohrman#james karen#nick pellegrino#donald hotton#paul larson#michael alaimo#incredibly intense movie. the way this builds tension in the last third is unreal‚ a steady ratcheting up from unease to full blown dread#didn't even realise i was frozen to the edge of my seat until the final minutes. career best for Lemmon? i really think it might be#cast entirely against type‚ not an iota of his comic persona‚ just an ordinary decent man pushed further and further into something#desperate and horrifying. his final lines absolutely gave me shivers. loved the editing on this too‚ the way it intercuts between#the team in the reactor‚ the team working to SCRAM it‚ the SWAT team and the producers at the news station. technically perfect cinema#and a real beautiful handling of the material. also love that this has time to address popular journalism practices and the gender gap on#tv news as well as the larger conspiracy element. really great film‚ just how much took me by surprise#also that vibrating cup of coffee? 10x scarier than the similar moment in Jurassic Park. it might look like a thriller but this has the#blood and bones of a horror movie in places. it also has a big tortoise in one scene and that's always a nice addition
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i know i’m super late to the party but i just read one does not love breathing by @wackus-bonkus-maximus
@ahavaleh thank you for the rec i will never emotionally recover from this
#god DAMN that was beautiful#a visual representation of my emotional journey#there are so many talented people in this fandom i am forever in awe wow#ARRIVING UNFASHIONABLY LATE TO THE PARTY IN FULL-BLOWN HYSTERICS#call that marinette-style#anyway im gonna go cry some more now
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Riot's TFP AU: Megatron as a patient, or how Soundwave tries to not go insane with his leader's unfortunate addiction to a certain Prime
From the moment Megatron left his quarters knowing that Soundwave was really cross with him, he knew there would be more consequences than just the communication blackout. Walking to the bridge he was barred from entering by the TIC, who simply pointed him in the direction of the medbay.
There were battles to be picked in one's life - and usually the warlord picked them all - but this time the guilt from disappointing his most loyal friend (beyond acceptable parameters) could not be stopped. It flooded his circuitry, making him flinch away and nod; he turned away from the door and followed the path to Knock Out's domain. Soundwave followed him like a shadow, most likely to ensure he reached the medic and stayed there for whatever reason he deemed necessary.
Megatron doubted he would like the outcome, but he knew that the blue mech was not actually plotting his demise - if Soundwave wanted him dead, he would already be melted down for the Cause before he stepped out of his room.
He wouldn't even blame him - TIC did not wish to lead, so it would not even be a selfish decision to climb rank. If Megatron ever became unsalvageable, Soundwave would put him down, simple as that. But before that ever happened, he would exhaust all the other options first.
Which, apparently, included getting the warlord examined.
Knock Out turned towards the opening door, unsurprised to see their leader sulk inside, nor to see the company. He gestured towards the berth the warlord was repaired on just a day prior.
"Hop on, my Lord, I have been informed you require a full physical," the medic began, as he took a relevant datapad in his servo to take notes on.
Megatron shot a look at his TIC, and upon seeing a small motion of the helm indicating the direction of the berth, he crossed over and laid down his tired frame. When he felt a gentle tap and heard a firm but polite 'please open the mediport for me, sir', he allowed a rarely used panel to reveal the port entrance, feeling oddly vulnerable. He didn't have to worry about Knock Out doing anything dangerous in Soundwave's presence, but the multitudes of professionals had taken a look at him and either gave up at once, or did the same just after a short while - when they realized how uncooperative of a patient he was.
The silver mech didn't really mean to be so difficult - but nearly every piece of medication tasted so bad to him that he would end up throwing it up or away instead of taking it. His body was in a permanent state of screaming, and his coding had not been updated in eons. Because of this, there was a limited patience to explain to yet another doctor that:
Yes, he couldn't recharge regularly;
Yes, he was very sensitive to the bright lights, and it made his helm feel like it was splitting apart at times;
Yes, he was aware his optics were no longer working as before.
No, he was having enough exercise;
No, he was not trying to off-line himself from lack of maintenance;
No, he would most certainly not discuss his self service schedule.
Meds, injections, operations - and, of course, therapy. The standard result.
This only meant he would be purging his tanks for a month trying to follow any instruction and fail from the distasteful residue from the medicine - all of this causing him to lose hope of the diagnosis being correct. He would feel let down at the lack of effect, get angry, and the cycle continued. There were periodic attempts to get this addressed - until he finally went out to get Dark Energon and was under nobody's care for a couple of years.
Not that he needed somebody to take care of-
An image of smiling Optimus crossed his mind, and he scratched out that last thought.
Knock Out used his distraction to plug into the exposed port, completing handshakes with his old programming and starting the check-up procedure. He raised the datapad, frowned at it, and took a look at the warlord.
"My Lord, when was your last full frame medical check-up?" Knock Out inquired, tapping the empty log on the patient file.
Megatron muttered something quietly.
"I didn't catch that, sir, you need to speak up, please," he asked again, a bit less patiently.
"I think it was before we left Cybertron," the mech answered without looking at the medic. He knew what to expect by then - a huff of anger, an exasperated sigh, or a combination of both.
Instead, Knock Out grew silent.
The red bot turned towards Soundwave, clearing his intake to catch his attention. TIC flashed a questioning glyph on his visor, as the medic asked:
"Is there any upcoming operation that requires Lord Megatron's presence or particular skill set?"
The blue mech paused, visor flashing with a flurry of images as he cycled through the upcoming plans and schedules. When the screen blanked once again, Soundwave shook his helm negative.
"Lord Megatron: not critical to operations before next rota generation," he added in a short burst of combined recordings. Knock Out nodded thoughtfully, still connected to the silver mech, and reached out to another datapad, filling it up and passing it to the TIC.
"That would be probably enough, if we don't take too many breaks," the mech said matter-of-factly, as the blue mech read up the contents of the form - before adding his own signature.
"Splendid, that's taken care of," the red mech smiled, and added as an afterthought prompted by the newfound professional concern:
"Some of the tests will take a while, so I believe we could turn this into an opportunity to check up on the entire staff," Knock Out observed the TIC for a moment, and after receiving a tired nod, waved the mech politely away.
"Fantastic, I will send over the list for the worst offenders and for the necessary shopping - or specialists to start looking for," he added, as he already was opening up a call to his conjunx to get cracking on the personnel's files.
Megatron was slightly confused at the odd exchange, but when the form was passed back to the medic, pieces fell together.
The rota is generated every six Earth's weeks. He could vaguely recall seeing the update warning a few days prior. The fact that the TIC signed anything the medic gave him, meant he was officially approving something.
They benched him.
As Soundwave turned to leave, Megatron blurted out a short chirp of distress, but remained in place when the visor turned to look at him one last time.
If it had been anger, he would have understood, possibly tried to overwrite the signature with his own - but he knew his loyal friend for a long time, and this was not that.
No, Soundwave was trying to hold onto hope. That Megatron could still be 'fixed'. The door slid shut, and the warlord felt hollow as his CPU supplied him with a number estimate of that happening.
It was depressingly low.
"Well, My Lord, your file is currently very patchy, I will need to check everything," the medic's voice drew his attention back, as he stared at the smaller mech blankly. He tilted his helm curiously, but his silence was taken as a permission to speak more. Knock Out started explaining the details, the plan of a lengthy cycle of checks and possible treatments, when Megatron raised his servo to cut him off.
"Why do you bother telling me this?"
The implied 'it's not like I can disagree and leave' hung in the air.
The red Con looked at him with a mix of worry and hesitation; putting the data pad he was holding on the side table, he decided to respond:
"Because you are not a subject to be studied, sir; you deserve to know what am I going to ask you about and why, especially since I would rather we worked together instead of me having to fight you on providing you medical care," said the medic, looking Megatron straight in the optics. Normally, it would make the bigger mech tense up, sensing competition - this time, he felt it was more of a look of careful wish for cordiality.
He sometimes forgot that Knock Out was an actual medic that could do his job well. And apparently, for some inexplicable reason, decided to employ his skill fully in his case.
Megatron nodded his helm, and tried to focus on what his old-new doctor was saying. It seems he would be in for a long haul.
*****
The check-up took a long time. As the warlord and medic were cooperating to help get a complete picture of what was out of the acceptable norm, Knock Out cursed not being able to discuss this with another professional - he was sure even Ratchet would not scoff at the multitude of issues he kept on adding to the file.
Lord Megatron was a medical disaster.
The silver mech had been riddled with pain that became such a norm that only the strongest pain relief would have made any difference. He did admit that the Dark Energon provided a dampening effect, and the medic immediately pushed the internal fluid check to highest priority.
Contamination from the use of the mysterious substance was spread out across the frame, lingering despite lack of external exposure at surprisingly active levels. Knock Out noted with alarm that the normal Energon digested was being tainted, most likely keeping the warlord sedated without his knowledge.
To remove the influence of the Unmaker would be to remove the only relief - and Megatron was still in a lot of pain despite its presence.
The red bot called for Soundwave's support when he had to share this particular piece of diagnosis, afraid of a possible lapse in the arrangement he managed to turn this situation into - worried it would cause the warlord to lash out. In an unlikely turn of events, Megatron's face blanked out, before he tersely agreed to get the flushing procedure started.
When he woke up afterwards, he stared at the ceiling of the medbay for a long time and turned to Knock Out:
"I severely underestimated just how much the Dark Energon numbed the pain," he said, gritting his denta, and the medic took the hint, excusing himself for a moment.
The low wail of pain could be heard through the walls. When it stopped, the red Con let a couple of short, measured in-vents out, before he got back. The silver mech was back to his stoic expression, but the curled servos indicated he was still struggling to get back to living with the actual amount of pain he knew he managed to suffer in silence before.
The return to the prior state of things was way harder than he expected.
Knock Out did not hold any viable alternative that could have rivaled or surpassed the effects of the substance they just purged from Megatron, but he was going to try to get one - or possibly get some of his patient's aches away.
One of the easier identifiable issues came to when the red bot examined the warlord's optics. When the silver mech flinched away at the passing light, Knock Out nearly dropped his tool - he knew there were going to be problems connected with them, the medic himself left some notes with a string suggestion for corrective action, but it never went beyond a temporary measure in form of shaded corrective visor.
Mostly because Megatron kept on 'forgetting' to wear it.
This time around, however, the access to mediport allowed the smaller mech to see the intense flare of pain, suggesting a helmache forming. He hummed before reaching out and deactivating the light, and ordering the other lights to dim.
The ache receded, systems noting lower strain.
"My Liege, I know we talked about this, but you really should be wearing the shaded visor we prepared for you," Knock Out mentioned, putting the tool away on a prepared tray table. Megatron grumbled a bit, but the medic had grown to know by then that it did not mean he reached the end of his tether, but that the mech was reluctantly listening.
The warlord not doing some sort of token protest usually meant he tuned the conversation out. Knock Out learned to sense those moments, usually waiting for the mech to get out of this particular tactic from sheer boredom.
"Do you still have the old one we made you?" asked the doctor, and seeing the shake of the silver helm, sighed.
Another thing to make.
"I will get one more done for you, sir, but if you don't use it, I'll have to wield the next onto your frame - your optics are set for much darker surroundings and no matter how many times I fix it, it shifts to pre-sets every time, causing you helmaches," he promised, putting a note down on the file. The medic could see Megatron was observing him, trying to gauge the seriousness of the threat; and at that point, Knock Out was very serious.
His momentary suggestion to check out the entire ship had ended up with way more work on his servos than he expected - worse yet, the mechs he was treating needed help beyond his skill.
Soundwave was updating him daily on the procurement and negotiations, but the millennia of war effort meant there were not many who would be willing to provide help to Decepticons - unless, of course, they paid a hefty fee.
Starscream was handling the budgeting, and seeing this supplied his recommendation: they needed to call Swindle. He would be most likely to get the results despite the cut he would be taking, so they allowed the mech to search the markets for their targets.
The shopping list grew every day.
Swindle was ecstatic.
Knock Out additional concern was the odd disposition of their supreme commander - namely, the distaste for one of the most common additives there existed. It was nearly in all of the medications as a stabilizer, and it was very rare to have any perception of it in the Cybertronian population.
Obviously, Megatron had an extreme case of it.
At first, when the medic realized his patient was very reluctant to take the meds, he tried hiding it in refueling rations.
It was also the last attempt of this solution pathway.
Megatron was able to feel the slightest presence of it in whichever substance he consumed, making it impossible to hide. Knock Out had to go apologize to the SIC who got accused of trying to poison the warlord that day.
For some reason, however, when the medic found colored glass in a similar pattern as the meds, the warlord ended up loving them - crunching on the marbles happily. Bribing the mech into taking more medicine became slightly easier with the promise of getting more of these in return.
Luckily, this time around the oddities of the Decepticon commander's frame came in handy - the glass didn't cause any issues, instead processing them easily. Knock Out checked a few times for possible residue buildup which occurred in some mechs with foreign substances, and noted with relief no adverse effects. For all he cared, Megatron could eat as many as he wanted, if it meant he would take the medicine.
Especially that they were still battling his insomnia…
The silver mech's recharge logs were all over the place - with no rhyme or reason, and an alarmingly low average time of rest.
There were, of course, exceptions - but the analysis of those, run in tandem with the known occurrences of loud music being played in particular quarters made it clear why that would be.
Knock Out cringed inwardly; since they were trying to solve this problem too, that was not the answer they could utilize.
*****
Solar cycles passed, and the life on Nemesis carried on.
With the warlord confined to a rigid schedule and the SIC at the helm, everyone seemed to lose some of the tension that came with Megatron's return from space.
Dark Energon was now fully isolated in Shockwave's lab, behind three different access codes held between Starscream, Soundwave, and Knock Out - their commander was banned from approaching the substance under threat of getting Tarn as a round-the-clock minder. As the DJD's leader volunteered readily to do it, the warlord kept far away from the lab.
The peaceful time was met with enthusiasm: the Vehicons were thrilled to have time to indulge in their hobbies and getting slagged less, thus the sense of community grew. The trinkets that got collected from around the Earth started showing up in shared spaces, colors and soft lights getting incorporated into spartan decor of the Nemesis. The dimness remained, as per Knock Out's insistence, but the variety of the glittering points strewn across the halls provided enough coverage in a pleasant manner that even the officers found appealing.
As the majority of the crew had been either dragged or came in willingly for a check-up at the medbay, the morale improved; who knew that showing concern for the troops would make them feel better?
The communication blackout was still in effect, but there were exceptions added to the list, allowing the troops to be contacted on operations outside of the ship; the ongoing income streams have been re-opened too, due to the increased spending estimates.
The Nemesis has changed - but none of its inhabitants could say anything negative about it.
*****
After the first three weeks, both Soundwave and Knock Out were satisfied with Megatron's progress - to the point they found it fitting to provide positive reinforcement.
Namely, returning the access to his private room for recharging.
Releasing the warlord from the all-cycle supervision was done on a condition that he would still show up at scheduled times so the medication could be monitored, but the privacy of own berth and trinkets was to help facilitate a gradual adjustment back to the normal daily routine. They couldn't shut him in medbay forever.
Though it seemed Soundwave wouldn’t mind this idea, if it kept him away from Optimus.
For a while, it worked as intended - Megatron followed up on their agreement, coming on his own volition to see Knock Out before he would be escorted by Soundwave to the office, where he would be finishing up on the reports back-log. He was not yet allowed back on the bridge, but there was not so much happening with the operations schedule keeping things on the down low for at least another couple of weeks. Starscream had a good hold of matters, so he couldn’t even have an excuse to be more involved - it was annoying, but as the medication went on, he appreciated having time to deal with the most irritating of side-effects at his own pace, without multiple witnesses.
Coming back to his own quarters was odd, at first - he didn’t miss the sounds of resident medical staff getting it on, but that was mostly because he couldn’t reach the same level of completion in his own self-servicing due to his odd arrangement with Optimus; not to mention that he couldn't deny the couple their happiness when one of them was his direct physician which could (and would) leave Nemesis at the mere suggestion of this sort.
He got used to the red mech, and would rather avoid having to lose the one medic they have around - or at least the only one they had that did not look at every patient as a science experiment.
As he closed the door and started getting on the berth to rest, he sighed, feeling the buzz under his plating come to the forefront of his mind yet again. In the medbay, it was easier to avoid the temptation, but in the privacy of his room, it came back in full force. The warlord was trying to wait the desire out, already sensing that he was fighting a losing battle. He could not allow himself to overload, his mind reminded, indulging into it would only drive the frustration higher.
Megatron managed to wait it out for the entire three days.
As his systems reported increasing signs of struggle, on the fourth day he found himself stepping over the threshold and going automatically to the interior sound controls.
He didn't think consciously about what he was doing - his servos moved in a well-known pattern, familiar music filling the space, as he turned to resign himself to losing himself for a bit in another fantasy.
A small explosion rocked the ship, stopping him from arranging himself in a preferred position on his knees. Momentarily distracted, he went to check it out, his combat systems greedily hoping for something to punch. When it turned out to be nothing major, he took off back to the room, where he was stopped by Soundwave standing by the door.
The music was still playing, only fractionally muted by the walls.
Megatron's plating tightened defensively, but when the TIC pointed him away with an air of disappointment, the silver mech sagged and obediently dragged himself to the medbay.
*****
The Decepticon leader had known payment for his relapse was due - the reinstated ban of his quarters was proof of that, but even he couldn't expect what his friend would choose as a revenge tactic.
When he heard the news of Autobots showing up to Starscream's operation, he was understandably curious, but as the fighting occurred during his scheduled medbay visit, he didn't pay it much thought.
Until the message arrived later on with two attachments. No words. Just the files.
But they came from Soundwave.
Megatron braced himself, and opened the first one.
The recording opened to his quarters, quickly led towards the storage compartment. The silver mech was mortified when a slim servo reached inside the closet and pulled the box with interfacing toys out. There was no looking around - Soundwave knew where it was and came for it directly.
As he watched the path of the TIC lead to the incinerator in Shockwave's lab, he started to panic.
The warlord was in denial the entire time, until he saw the box get tossed inside, opened slightly to allow the heat to reach the interior. The blue digits turned the settings lower - the container would not incinerate completely, but it would be greatly damaged nonetheless.
As the fire raged, Megatron's spark filled with anguish so visceral, he let out a noiseless cry the entire time the box burned. When its charred remains were moved into another container, his throat hurt despite him not uttering even a whimper.
The recording ended.
He didn't want to see the other one, but he knew that if he didn't see it, Soundwave would force him to watch it the next day in the office. He resigned himself to being mortified beyond what he already felt.
Megatron was not disappointed in that regard.
It must have been the fight earlier this cycle, as they didn't get to face the Autobots in the meantime; he could see that the TIC emerged from the ground bridge carrying the same box he saw on the previous file.
The warlord was initially alarmed that the blue mech would just give it to the Prime, but instead a fight broke out, the box forgotten.
Seeing Optimus struggling against his top lieutenants was difficult, but he could not stop feeling proud of his crew - he knew they were capable, and seeing it was always fantastic to witness. As much as he didn't want the Prime dead, he couldn't help but marvel at the beauty of Starscream and Soundwave partnering up.
At least if they off-lined him in the end, he knew that they could take on anything.
He was surprised to notice the newcomers to the field, recognising the frames easily from memory - nearly forgetting what this all was about.
When a sharp order to retreat came, he noticed Soundwave pointed towards something, prompting Starscream's goading towards the Prime, who was barely holding himself from overheating from exhaustion.
The box.
The TIC stepped through the portal, but he looked back towards Optimus one more time.
Megatron knew he saw it too.
The wide blue optics filled with dread.
Optimus suspected what was inside - and if the warlord knew his lover as well as he hoped, he would have confirmed his guess.
Prime knew their collection was gone.
The silver mech curled in on himself, his spark pulsing with sadness and humiliation.
*****
Megatron was devastated - and it showed.
The progress made with Knock Out, the changes to Nemesis, the general improvement of morale, even increasing the rate of victories - all of this didn't matter.
Their box was destroyed. There was no fixing it.
And Optimus knew about it. They gave it to him, after all. Like a cursed gift.
The warlord felt unmoored - carried only by the routine he had complied with so far, missing at least a solar or two from his memory. He was mostly staring into nothingness, barely acknowledging anyone.
At least Soundwave did not act like he didn't know why he behaved like this. The TIC was waiting him out, as the silver mech would not even speak to his friend, communicating in nods instead. Megatron still followed the schedule they set up for him, but the balance has shifted - the repetitiveness of his days was grating, instead of grounding.
He felt trapped inside his frame.
Lying down on the slab in the medbay, he idly noted Knock Out's presence - he opened the medical port without prompting, and the red bot plugged in while maintaining a bit more distance than before.
The warlord couldn't explain why it bothered him, so he kept his mouth shut; with the other monitoring his systems, it was hard to avoid confrontation.
"There was an odd spike across your multiple processes right now, my Lord - would you be able to tell me why that happened?" Knock Out asked tentatively, more carefully than he used to. Megatron didn't think he actually needed to provide an answer, but something in the medic's posture prompted him to say:
"You are acting differently."
The red mech startled at the reply, expecting another session of complete silence. He weighed his options, and sighed.
"Lord Megatron, your recent behavior led me to believe you wish to be left alone - as your physician I am unable to comply with this preference, but I will not force my presence on you more than necessary," Knock Out explained, tapping idly on the pad in hand.
"I do wish to be left alone, but this has nothing to do with you, doctor," Megatron's words sounded perplexed, but honest. The title had been slipping into their conversations before, so the medic was pleasantly surprised it was not rescinded.
"I will take that as a vote of confidence in my skills then," Knock Out smiled, letting himself slide back into a more relaxed stance, as he pulled closer the tray with assorted meds for his patient. The frown on the warlord's faceplates did not go unnoticed, but there was little to be done there.
He needed to get the alternative medications soon, the rate at which they were going through the marbles collection was concerning.
Megatron took every pill into his servo and as fast as possible swallowed them in one go - the taste was dreadful and the quicker it went down, the less suffering would be there to experience afterwards. The worst was when something got stuck and he could not flush it down - he would rather claw his throat out at times like that then let it stay there to dissolve on its own.
The silver mech started to power down, knowing he should try to allow the new concoction from the Pit to do its job. Knock Out let out a quiet sound of relief, as the evening routine went by the easy way this time around. He bid his commander a quiet farewell and locked the door to the medbay behind.
*****
Megatron didn't realize when recharge claimed him, but an undefined time after he laid down, he found himself being shaken awake by a pair of familiar servos.
He scoffed, unwilling to wake up, because he must still be asleep.
There was no way it was actually Optimus - he wouldn't do something as stupid as come onto Nemesis, so he must be dreaming.
The touch became more insistent, so he lazily on-lined his optics.
Red and blue filled his vision.
"Hello, love - you're finally awake, I was worried I wouldn't have a chance to talk to you," said Optimus with a smile, as he stood right by Megatron's shoulder like this situation was completely normal for them.
"What are you doing here?" Megatron hissed out, starting to get up, when a servo on his chest pushed him down.
"No, don't get up - I need to leave soon, it took me a while to get around the lock and I'm expecting alarm to be raised pretty soon," rushed the Prime, patting the silver plating pacifyingly, placing a kiss onto the other's helm.
Right as the warlord was about to say something, the shrill sound of intruder alert sounded out throughout the ship.
The Autobot cursed, as he fumbled around some item in his servo, before he pushed it into Megatron's hold.
"Here, I got you something - I had some time and well… couldn't stop thinking about you, and suspected I was not the only one like that," Optimus chuckled right over his audial, so he could be heard over the sharp sounds filling the medbay.
Megatron, who could not comprehend this surreal situation while still fighting off the effects of interrupted recharge, just nodded and curled his digits around the gift. He was rewarded with another kiss, and a thrilling purr of "thank you, darling," as Optimus stepped away, watching the door to the medbay.
The warlord sat numb, observing as lights of a ground bridge flickered in the dim room, and loud shouts were heard through the walls in the corridor.
Prime lunged into the barely formed portal right as at least ten Vehicons, Breakdown and Starscream burst into the medbay, nearly falling over Knock Out's short frame as he keyed the entrance open. The shots they sent towards the source of light never reached the mech going through it, instead leaving scorch marks on the walls.
"Lord Megatron, have you been injured?" Starscream inquired after it became obvious they came too late. The silver bot shook his helm negative, as he kept his field tucked in tightly.
"Move the ship and check how he had been able to pinpoint our location," he ordered, shifting focus away from himself towards the security of the Nemesis. The seeker shot a suspicious look towards his leader, but nothing seemed out of order - and the concern raised by the mech was valid. They needed to understand how the Prime was able to get onto the ship and so far inside before the alert went out.
They couldn't let it happen again.
Decepticon SIC nodded, offering an acknowledgement of the order back to the warlord, and waved everyone out. The seeker had to find and talk to Soundwave - the TIC would be most likely the only one who would be able to trace Optimus's path, and who could counter it.
Megatron watched them all go away, and when the doors closed with a soft whoosh, his field unwound itself, spreading around the space like an explosion.
He was filled with so many contrasting emotions, there was no way he would be able to recharge again.
Curling his digits around the small item in his servo, he pondered:
Perhaps he could spend the time on something more… pleasurable.
******************************
Another ficlet inspired by @transingthoseformers's TFP AU, a direct follow-up to this and running parallel to this - and fleshed out by these posts about Nemesis time wth Megs as a patient.
#tfp au#tfp_AU_writing#transformers#maccadam#megop#i am taking liberty in making Knock Out a competent medic - just not a full-blown professional#mostly cause I do not want to force Megatron into even more distress - he's already in medical hell as is#and is complying because soundwave is really cross with him#there is a certain trust needed to get any medical care going and working#and I want there to be some respect between them both for this to yield fruit#esp since megs has it so bad they are all fighting a losing battle - but maybe#JUST MAYBE#they can fix some of the pain that plagues his aft#also yeah when i breached 2k I knew it was going to be... a while for me to finish this#and Riot you keep on adding more stuff so I had to go OH DAMN WAIT REWRITE XD#loved it tho#this AU is beautiful and I already surrendered on getting the WIP list to just#never end for this AU#it's just adding on and adding on#it's better than not having a prompt#so yeah#love this#love the AU#i hope i am not talking too much here#but i do hope you at least wont hate it
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ahn bo hyun’s singing voice is so good, it's so dreamy and it fits the song so well i’m in love
#see you in my 19th life#ahn bo hyun#just discovered that he sang the track “i'll embrace your past” from the osts#and i'm BLOWN b/c that's my favorite ost from the drama#it's so beautiful#and his voice is so.. full#idk how to explain it but it's absolutely gorgeous#definitely gonna be on loop for this month and the next
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I think it would be funny, if from Baumeister siblings only Tita would be able to wield equivalent of Mingrelian and she would wield it well enough to argue with her mother in Mingrelian.
#Mingrelians really do deserve my respect. They have to learn how to speak Georgian and then some foreign language.#The same goes to Svans and Lazs#On my course in university there are a lot of Mingrelians. When they start to speak Mingrelian I am confused (not in a bad way)#and fascinated. Because I barely understood anything. But Mingrelian#Svan and Laz languages are endangered treasures.#I didn't expect that I would start a full blown rant about Kartvelian languages in my silly post about my OC#Mokem Series#oc#ocs#Tita Baumeister may be a minor. somewhat spoiled and pity character. But oh boy. She roasts people in Mingrelian.#The problem is I won't be able to show how she roasts people in this beautiful language 'cause I don't know this language.
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_________ ⋆˚ ★ deleted scenes edit
Perhaps my only real expertise, my only talent, is to endure beyond the endurable., Jeff VanderMeer, Annihilation
#i need like another full blown episode about the klingon war#everything they went through#how they grew so close that she is his favorite#i need an entire background about them + erica fighting in the war#going through the unimanigible#and still leaving with... so much heart#just the way she just got there and already jumped into work#is seeing things other overlooked#cause she is so attentive#which is something she takes everywhere: her personal#her professional life#cause she wants to help!!! and also she doesn't want to stop because its worse to be there and not be working when she knows there#is something she can do to help??? that she can't rest when she knows she can do better#i love her <3#˗ˏˋ ― just the person for the job. , 𝚖𝚢 𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚝𝚜. ´ˎ˗#˗ˏˋ ― more starkly attractive than beautiful. , 𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎. ´ˎ˗#˗ˏˋ ― nurse first. , 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝. ´ˎ˗
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im going to make art about this
#The Spinal Saga#(except the late stage cancer is no longer merely probable)#idk when - i have all moms paints and canvases#but i have to figure out what im doing i need to rough out some sketches and shit#im feeling a lot of roses brambles thorns energy rn yall might have noticed#bc this thing has been growing through me from the inside im feeling like#trails of bramble and vine and here and there a little prickling thorn#but the blooms are in my left tit and this now removed vertebra and theyre poison#big flush full blown blood dark poison rose blossom crushing my vertebra from the inside out#the brambles and the thorns can be treated with herbicide but the blossoms have to be deadheaded#so the art is either me waist up from the back with brambles poking out from under my skin#a pair of shears in my hand and two beautiful dripping bloody full blown roses having been chopped off#or the same thing but instead of a human me its a wolf partially made of brambles#looking at the viewer with one of the blossoms lying on on the ground and the other in her teeth
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when I'm medical waste I want what's left of my ashes to be stored in a mundane can of carnation evaporated milk from 1952
#death mention#i guess lol#just a whimsical little wish#my full death wish is to be healthy enough to donate as much as possible and have friends and family get my cremains put in those blown#glass paper weights#and then i want to be distributed to various thrift stores#where people will take tiny pieces of me everywhere#for maximum haunting or a quiet lasting legacy idk and idc#im not scared of death and im not so vain as to want to live forever#but do you ever really die if you are physically or metaphorically found in beautiful things#caw caw
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