#fuck you queenie /jk /jk/jk

[cecil-the-crybaby]

Hah nice

[queenie-the-court-jester]

hi I'm queenie! TEMPORARY HIATUS!!

★once I've got my stories going, don't be afraid to ask about them!

★but please be respectful! This is what I won't write for:

★ •trans or male reader! I don't mind doing them, it's just I don't know how to write for them and since I'm not either, I don't want to accidentally miswrite them and upset somebody. But you can still ask, I'll probably take a good long while though 💧

★ • classic Wattpad y/n. I like to keep my darlings as relatable as possible. I'm tired of seeing submissive bland (names). Time for 'go fuck yourself' y/n

★scat. Pedophilia. Minor x adult. WATERWORKS ❌. Incest. Stepcest. Age regression. Furries. Oc x oc unless I really really like it.

★minors please do not interact

★what I will write for: pretty much everything, I'm not picky! Pitch in your own ideas, I'd love to hear them! {Warning this'll include yanderes: I don't condone them but they do have Me a little interested}

★I'm mainly a fem! reader writer so, my male readers, I am so sorry 🥲 I'll try and make some gn fics just for you

★that's it really, I don't mind. Just be respectful to me and the other people who would like to enjoy my nonsense!

I'M A TRADITIONAL BEGGINER ARTIST SO PLEASE BARE WITH ME!

•°. *࿐ ⋆ •°. *࿐ ⋆ •°. *࿐ ⋆ •°. *࿐ ⋆

Current works:

Riley Sanderson x reader 🖤, doing his makeup

Yandere farm x farmhand reader 🌾, returning their feelings (cow couple, quintuplets)

It's raining cats and dogs 🐱🐶🌾

Country roads take me home ����🐴🌾, big daddy smut , taking a nap

Where the birds and fish gather 🦚🐟

Pure as a lamb 🐏🐐, Kim the goat

Yandere popular girl x reader x emo boy, sick darling, date at the mall!, crack imagine

oc kink list: part 1, part 2

Mild yandere circus x reader: part 1 Wendy!

Yandere bunny hybrid x reader, extra details + doodle, cotton x meat eater!darling

Yandere playboy x reader, reader escapes

Yandere florist x reader

yandere cupid x reader, househusband!

Yandere online boyfriend x afab!reader, sadistic reader

Yandere church boy x reader

yandere rockstar x FEM!reader

Oc's ethnicities

Yandere cheerleader x fem!reader, random headcanons

Yandere friend group x FEM!reader, reader dates kiross, what do they want?

Yandere fantasy party x gn reader

Blackwood academy masterlist

•°. *࿐ ⋆ •°. *࿐ ⋆ •°. *࿐ ⋆ •°. *࿐ ⋆

Headers by: @pixiesite @cafekitsune

The anons: 💕 - 👍 - 🍧 - 🐁 - 🍄 - 👾 - <3 - 🎀 - 😶‍🌫️ - 🦖 - 🇦🇶 - ☔ - blorbo - 🐢 - 🦌 - 🐮 - silver anon - 🎸- 🎶 - 🏮- ✂️ - 🩰 - 🥭🧚🏿‍♀️ - ❓- 🌹- 🐼 anon <-evil (jk)

Note to self:

@a-goblin-named-cherry wishes to be tagged on all farmhand reader content

[bludino]

My headcanons of the gangs genders/sexualities

I am mentally ill I refuse to stay silent any longer

#1 Pomni- Bi

Pomni is a depressed, anxious little cat who keeps getting soggy despite her best attempts to get dry. She's so sad and keeps getting knocked down and that feels like the bisexuals I know and love. She probably smokes cigarettes with shaky hands and stares at the wall in the shower. Such a little loser who probably bites. Love her.

#2 Ragatha- trans and lesbian

Lesbians love sewing!! I thought I was a lesbian and I sewed then!! In honesty I made Ragatha a lesbian bc I can't stand ragatha x Jax I have to stop it at all costs I'm sorry. I feel like she's an elder gay she has such a maternal energy to her. Pomni loves it Ragatha gets the blow dryer when she gets soppy again. Also my impulses are to make every character transgender and same sex attracted.

#3 Jax- trans and gay

I made him gay so I can have him all to myself. Half jk he's my favorite character so I projected the shit outta him. He's gay and trans because he's got that t-boy swagger and I wish it so.

#4 Gangle- ace/aro

This one is also projecting. I just think it's funny if Zooble reads through Gangle's 200,000 word novel and they ask her "You're are/ace why are you even into this" and Gangle just shrugs. I think she has a shirt of the contemplative wolf and loves it unironically.

#5 Zooble- genderfluid, pansexual & ace

Bold to assume Zooble gives a fuck. They feel what they feel when they feel it, a real go with the flow thing. Zooble and Gangle are best friends, they smoke and listen to queen on the grammaphone Zooble has bc they're cool and vintage like that. I fucking love Zooble they're unbothered, moisturized as they can be in a circus hell scape and satisfied.

#6 Kinger- trans and bi

What a crazed man. Look at him. He's definitely sexually experimented with men before he met his wife but never realized it had a label until Pomni told him. What a wife guy you know Queenie was his whole world he loved her so much. It was breakfast in bed for her everyday. He can't cook though so it's probably fruit loops and frozen waffles. He probably has a homoerotic relationship with Caine where they're both oblivious to how they sound to other people. He's just trans he's always known that. He has chest scars. Don't think of the implications.

# 7 Caine- fuck if I know

Maybe he's gay. Idk. He really likes Kinger though in some aspect he's into men. He's not supposed to have favorites but he does. He does little things for every character but he likes Kinger wayyyy more.

[thx-sunsxts-addrxss]

@aylin-hijabi @tastetherainbow290 @tinadablackthorn(who re blogged the last post) @queenie-blackthorn

basically, I’m texting in the dance group chat right. And I’m like: hey guys, what’s the location of the place” and blah blah blah right.

and yk, lemon dude’s friend (who’s in charge of it) sends it to me.

(WHY ARE THE PHOTOS ARENT WORKING I HATE THIS)

And I’m like: ok besties gonna go pick that up 🥰 gonna have to step outside and socialise

lemon dude: you do that???

me: stfu

Zoe: I don’t think we’ll hear back from her guys

me: OH MY GOD. BE QUIET.

person 1: since when did lemon dude fit in the category of loife’s 'oh my god be quiet’??

lemon dude: we’re besties 💅✨

lemon dude: that was my sister

me: “we’re besties 💅✨” indeed but u didn’t have to say it like that lmfao

me: me and lemon dude besties forever arc guys

lemon dude: go pick the costumes up loife.

me: no I’m not going alone like

me: EVERY TIME I STEP OUTSIDE-

person 2: ITS SOCIAL SUICIDDEEEEE

me: omg ily let’s be friends

Zoe: idk I could go with u but I have to give the participants names at the same time.

zoe: someone else go supervise her

me: well excuuuuusee me 🤨

zoe: lemon dude

lemon dude: I have the chore of supervising her???

lemon dude: jk pls don’t kill me

me: come here I won’t kill u 🥰🫶🫶🫶🫶

lemon dude: guys I’m scared she never uses that many emojis

me: are you calling me dry

lemon dude: no maam.

me: come supervise me if ur so mature

lemon dude: haha no

lemon dude: I’m too scared to socialise

(I was lowkey disappointed and panicking)

zoe: no u have to go

zoe: if she fucks something up while communicating we won’t be getting our costumes

lemon dude: I’m no better tho

lemon dude: I cannot socialise.

me: come let’s go

me: we’re going on a trip on our favourite rocket ship 🤡

lemon dude: fine

and that’s how we’re going to go together in 5 minutes 🤭

[titan-god-helios]

thank you for the tag friend !! <333 /p

three ships: kiribaku, solangelo, kinger x queenie

first ever ship: i think. kiribaku. either that or harry x hermione (i was a huge harry potter nerd before i learnt about the bullshit jk rowling pulled which made me extra sad bc like. IM trans. and harry potter was what made me want to write books in the first place, so ouchie)

last song: misanthrapologist, will wood

last movie: puss in boots: the last wish (its so good it's one of my all time faves)

currently reading: i'm rereading the perks of being a wallflower (prob my favourite book icl)

currently watching: home improvement (the sitcom)

currently consuming: nothing, and i'm not hungry, but i really want tonkotsu ramen rn

current craving: tonkotsu ramen !! or just ramen. or just noodle soup of some sort. i love soup so fucking much.

open tags !! ily guysss <333 /p

Tag nine people to get to know better (thanks for the tag @partywithponies !!!!)

Three ships: uhhhhhhh. uh. uhh. supercorp, cissiecassie, kjmac

First ever ship: sue me but harry/ginny. hate harry potter now but god i had such a crush on ginny and related to harry a lot.

Last song: Running into Your Mom at an Aa Meeting by Butch Baby

Last movie: Wallace and Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit

Currently reading: invincible compendium one!

Currently watching: smallville!

Currently consuming: nothing

Currently craving: nothing

Tagging: @evilwickedme @frosty-the-killer-doll @antifa-terra @starcam413 @vampoholica @azirashell thats not nine but whatever

[lex-the-flex]

Hello loves, I’m sad to say this, but due to some news I’ve received from a friend, I will be removing The Scamander Brothers from my Masterlist entirely.

As much as I love the Fantastic Beasts movies, actors, plot, costumes, world-building etc, I cannot support J.K Rowling who is a transphobic individual who only makes money and doesn’t care about the LGBTQ+ community.

So I’m sorry my loves, and as much as this hurts my heart, it has to be done. I don’t care how many followers or online friends I lose because of this. And I’ll see you guys tomorrow. 👋🏻❤️

tagging ~

@dreamliners

@geniedetails

@callmemoonlight123

@sunflowergurl98

@sunshinebuckybarnes

@bibbidibobbidibucky

@beautifulsoulsublime

@bonky-n-steeb

@teebarnes

@awkwardharpy

@maybeimart

@a-o-m

@casperthefriendlygh0st

@thewildseuphoria

@scmndr

@hugz4camilo

@visionsofsweettea

@viscountmelbourne

@full-time-make-believer

@thefunniestavenger

@ladyrebel25

@mrs-brekker15

@mr-brekker15

@iamhavingamomenthere-crowley

@remusstefon

@yurys-pyon

@matthewmurdocksblog

@reader101k

@dramanut98

@lunakkey

@winter-soldier-101

@oinchavengewho

[ct-offical-sexyman]

I feel like I don’t talk enough about Queenie and what a gross spoilered character she turned out to be.

I wanna do a whole analysis on this topic at some point, but that would require that I rewatch crimes of grindelwald. Which is something I’m not keen to do at this point in time.

All I’m gonna say for now is that when you mind control your boyfriend and he reacts in a way you didn’t want. You have no right to get pissy over being called a freak. You just did a lot worse to him. Have some perceptive, Queenie!

[mayabooowrites]

Newts muggle|N.S

Based on a story I'm writing on wattpad with my friend LilithlilaK who is cringe lmao jk

Newt walks up the stairs from feeding the animals

He then sees you standing and immediately got you a chair

"Newt I may be pregnant but I'm fine, I'm thinking I'd rather stay with leta and Theseus they didn't treat me like glass, and didn't worry when I picked up a tea cup." You say and newt chuckles as he kisses your neck

"Hey your my precious baby, I have to take care of you and our baby who's inside you right now." Newt says as he kisses your baby bump

But suddenly there was a knock at the door

"And that's leta and Theseus coming to take me away, yay." You say and newt laughs

"I hope they aren't coming to steal my wife away from me." Newt says and you go back to cooking as newt opens the door and then slams it shocked

"Hey I know Theseus is ugly but that's no way to treat him." You say jokingly and newt laughs

"Just uh, people from America are here and they um don't know about uh us." Newt says and you sigh

"Just let them in it's raining." You say and newt opens it and smiles

"Sorry about that." Newt says as he lets them in and they stopped shocked as they looked at you

"Who's she?" One of the woman ask holding onto a mans arm

"My wife y/n." Newt says as you set the table

"Hello." You say and you try and reach for a few more plates from the top shelf but you were too pregnant you couldn't get it "Newt please help." You say and newt waves his wand and the plates set themselves "Thank you." You say and newt nods

"And that's why she married me obviously." Newt says and you roll your eyes as you serve dinner

"Hey is that spaghetti?" The one newt had called Jacob says and you nod

"Weren't you oblivated Jacob?" Newt asks and Jacob looks over

"Long story I want spaghetti, ask queens or Tina." Jacob says as you hand him a plates

You set everyone's plates with pasta seeing their all staying for dinner now

And queenie and Tina were confused why you didn't use your wand at all, and used muggle utensils the whole time to serve the food

"Darling I can do it please, you need to rest." Newt says and you frown

"I may be 6 months pregnant but fuck you I can do what I want." You say out of breath from talking and sit down "God damm being angry is hard." You say and newt chuckles as he kisses your cheek

"Yeah sure you can." Newt says as he waves his wand and the food goes onto everyone's plate

"Ok magic boy we get it no need to show off just because I can't do that." You say and newt smiles he loves how you react to magic calling him magic boy and stuff, oh Merlin he loves you so much. Queenie and Tina sit down and were shocked

"Your wife is a no-maj?" Tina says and you nod

"Yes I'm a muggle." You say and newt kisses your cheek as he was standing behind you as Jacob smiles

"Glad to meet another none magic person who knows about the wizarding world." Jacob says and you were shocked but smiled

"Oh you are that's awesome." You say smiling at him

"So Newt how did you end up with a no-maj?" One of the ladies ask and newt looks at you and smiles and you nod saying sure I'll explain

"Oh, well newt had accidentally forgotten to oblivate me because he was so captivated by my beauty obviously, now I was taking a walk in a forest and saw him use magic as he was trying to get an animal and then he noticed me and chatted with me, then I left and he went around London looking for me for the next week realizing he forgot to oblivate me and then decided to not oblivate me again when he found me, and then we went on a date, been together ever since." You say and newt nods

"Yup." Newt says and Tina laughs

"Seems you have a thing for accidentally not oblivating no-majs Huh?" She says and newt smiles

"It happens." Newt says as you rub your baby bump

"Oh fuck I forgot about the other one, that sandwich wouldn't do they need to eat more then that." You say marching upstairs and newt laughs that also slipped his mind

"The other one—" queenie starts but then you walk downstairs with a little 3 year old girl

"Newt take Hope as I get her plate ready, she's hungry now see hope when mommy says a pbj sandwich isn't enough you listen, your gonna get cranky if you don't eat more then that." You say and pregnancy brain is a real thing, you forget where you are sometimes, but your own daughter has never slipped your mind until today, but again she said she can only eat the sandwich and be fine and that's what she wanted for dinner, then took a nap so really not your fault, in your mind she already ate you just remembered she actually needs more

"Oh wow." Tina says as Hope grabs newts hair and newt laughs

"Hey sweetie, how was your nap?" Newt asks and hope smiles and claps her hands as she nods "Aww that's my good girl." Newt says kissing her cheek

"Aww isn't she adorable." Jacob says as you hand newt her bowl of pasta and he helps her eat it

"Yes she is, she's my little Angel, she's a bit shy aren't you that's why my little talkative girl isn't speaking." Newt says as he smiles, at hope and how adorable she was 'Y/n being a muggle is always something people aren't happy with, my own parents didn't like it at first but they love her now and I love her and we have the perfect family, and I love it so much.'

Eh it's just a little thing I wrote based on another book I'm writing, actually this is basically chapter one of the book, but it may not be good but hope you enjoyed it

[dmitri-smerdyakov]

Thoughts on Secrets of Dumbledore - SPOILERS

So basically I have a cold/sore throat from screaming at kids for four days straight so I’m not actually well and I was so close to not going on opening day in the UK today (well, technically it’s Saturday now so it’s yesterday but still) because I feel rotten. But I had to - as someone known for their Fantastic Beasts obsession, and having waited for nearly four years, I wasn’t about to miss out on this film on opening day.

There was a lot going on and I’m not well so I may have missed some things out or even missed bits in the film, so please bear with me, I’ve tried my best to remember as much as possible and I’m also happy to answer any DMs or asks if people have questions! Also, I’ve tried to keep it as in order as it happened as possible, but again, I’m ill and have probably gotten mixed up in places!

So, here’s my post about the film. There are SPOILERS below the cut so please don’t open the post and then send hate to me because I spoiled the film because not only is it marked and tagged, it’s also under a read more! You’ve been warned!

⚠️ SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT! SPOILERS FOR THE NEW FANTASTIC BEASTS ⚠️

Firstly, let me take a moment to say FUCK JK ROWLING 🖕🏻 ANYWAY, moving on:

First of all, I liked SoD a LOT more than CoG. Like a LOT more. It felt more like the first film mixed with a bit of Harry Potter, and even used a LOT of the same soundtrack from the first film

This film was funny in place but also REALLY dark in others??? Like holy shit???

I’m not sure how long after CoG the film is set quite frankly but I’m pretty sure at one point they said that it was a month ago??? Or Lally said that a year ago was when Jacob met Newt??? But then Bunty says she’s been working for Newt for 8 years and however many days… I don’t know, I thought it was the 30s???

Also it’s Autism Acceptance Month and the fact we’re getting Newt Scamander being his beautiful autistic self this month just makes sense ♾

So the film starts with Dumbledore and Grindelwald having tea which is kind of nice

Sorry to the Depp fans out there but Mads Mikkelsen should have been cast as Grindelwald from the start… I agree what WB did was appalling, but I loved Mads as Grindelwald, which I honestly wasn’t expecting

“Because I was in love with you” - HE FUCKING SAID IT. The gasp that went out in the audience was so fucking funny, like how do y’all NOT know by now???

NEWT IS MY AUTISTIC HERO 😭 I adore him, I almost wish the films were solely about him searching for magical beasts frankly

Newt helping the mummy Qilin give birth was so Newt, I love him, he was putting his head on its side and comforting her, I adore him

Grindelwald’s followers got the first baby Qilin but then the mother had twins 😭❤️

YES I CRIED AT MUMMY QILIN DYING WITH NEWT NEXT TO HER 😭

Newt cradling a baby Qilin is not the content I was expecting but I’m grateful for it

The Newt scenes remain my favourite in this film, and maybe I’m biased because he’s autistic and I’m autistic, but yeah

Pickett with his mini glasses 😭❤️

Teddy being in charge in the case was adorable like omg

Wooo Wyvern!!! I love seeing more beasts!

So apparently Qilins bow to those who are pure of heart and can also see the future or something?

Grindelwald kept touching Credence/his face in a way that made me VERY uncomfortable

NOT GRINDELWALD SLITTING THE BABY QILIN’S THROAT

Queenie is now a platinum blonde????

Theseus remains my hot husband 🤧😮‍💨💛 fucking adore that man and would jump him without second thought

PRAISE THE MAKE UP AND HAIR PEOPLE, THEY LET THESEUS HAVE A BIT OF CURL IN HIS HAIR ❤️👏🏻👀👌🏻

Theseus was hardcore judging Dumbledore for making that blood pact and I find that really funny??? He’s like “… why would you do that???”

I love love LOVE the Scamander brothers so much, I love their dynamic and them as individuals! The banter, the moments… love them!

I can relate to Theseus being the exasperated older sibling but also relate to Newt being the autistic one whose sibling is like “…????? The fuck???”

Queenie checking on Credence was nice, they have a couple of nice moments together, and I love that she told him that she doesn’t always tell Grindelwald what she hears Credence thinking

I don’t think I was supposed to be thinking “LESBIAN QUEENS” when Vinda and Queenie were in a shot together and yet that’s exactly where my brain went 😭

Jacob was still getting the biggest laughs out of the audience, I love him. He remains such a wonderful character even in the depth of a depression/funk

To be fair, there were quite a few laughs in the film and it wasn’t just me laughing, there were a lot of people of there and most of them were laughing

Noooo not Jacob’s bakery struggling because of the Great Depression (presumably)

LALLY IS A FUCKING QUEEN I LOVE HER

I love love LOVE the Jacob and Lally dynamic so much, it was one of my favourite things in the film

Bunty is the fucking thirstiest most desperate bitch. I don’t like the actress and I don’t like the character and every time she appeared and made a joke I had to roll my eyes. Her character is STILL very much “I’m in love with my boss who doesn’t love me back” and not a lot else

Shout out to the reviewer who said she was “one note” and another who said she was a “JK R*wling lookalike” lmfao 🤣

I love that Newt and Lally are already friends who have corresponded, it’s so sweet

Newt introducing Lally to everyone and forgetting his own brother 😂

I’m not sure but… are the films gonna make Theseus and Lally a thing??? There was a little moment where they met each other/were introducing themselves directly to each other, then they got paired up in Bhutan… idk, maybe just me?

BABY NIFFLERS GETTING BIG 😭

Also I think two of their names in the film are said to be “Alfie” and “Timothy”???

By the way, someone on Twitter that I was once friends with said a few weeks ago in the audio chat/space thing that Newt’s autism “disappeared” when he hugged Jacob (because that had been seen in trailers) and I would like to say NOPE. Not how it works, don’t care if it was a joke or if that person was autistic too, it made me super uncomfortable! And when I said that, she blocked me so… yep.

^Sorry but I don’t like jokes like that. Maybe I’m just sensitive but it made me, an autistic person who loves Newt and is so grateful for him being autistic, very upset and uncomfortable. Maybe some autistic people are fine with those jokes, and that’s fine! I’m just personally not, it makes me upset and makes me feel like they’re mocking Newt being autistic or saying he’s not really autistic so… sorry.

Knowing he’s autistic made me so happy and helped me accept the fact I was going for an autism diagnosis (and have since received the diagnosis that yes I’m autistic). Knowing this non-stereotypical character I loved and who’s played by one of my favourite actors is autistic helped me feel better during the process and made me feel like it would be okay, so yeah!

Tina being the head of the MACUSA AUROR OFFICE LIKE SHE FUCKING DESERVES, WE LOVE A GIRLBOSS

I love that Lally was praising the shit out of Tina and saying she was an incredible woman, we love to see it

Okay, on the topic of Tina… I wish there was more of her. I do. Writing that she’s too busy just seemed kind of lazy. She has like 2 minutes of screentime near the end of the film, first at MACUSA and then at the Jacob and Queenie wedding???

You can’t honestly and seriously tell me that Tina fuckin’ Goldstein would rather be head of the Aurors than try to help her sister or Credence???? Like yeah yeah yeah, she’s a career girl and all that, but also she was willing to lose her job and break the rules to save Credence before??? What the fuck???

Newt seemed super sad about Tina being busy and Lally jumping in to say how amazing she is… ??? I don’t know why but it felt like there was more to it than just her being busy??? Because I’m pretty sure there was a weird silence, and it sounded like they were trying to cover it up???

JACOB GOT A WAND 👏🏻🤧 it didn’t have a core but still?!? He deserves it

I love Teddy refusing to let go of Theseus’ red and golden tie 😂

NO BUT DID JACOB MAKE A WAND INNUENDO JOKE OR???? I couldn’t hear properly because my ears are blocked by my sister’s friend was sitting next to me and she started laughing??? Something about Theseus’ wand actually working???

I do appreciate Theseus just being the bemused and dry older brother, I know some of it is probably down to still being sad about his fiancée dying but still

There were quite a few mentions of Leta, by the way, which was interesting

I had some trouble hearing the dialogue at times, and I thought this might be just because I’ve got blocked ears from my cold - but then my sister and her friend (both of whom are not sick) also said that they struggled to hear it so… ???

NOT THEM CLEARING GRINDELWALD OF HIS CRIMES 😭😭😭 BE MORE FUCKED I DARE YOU-

Not Theseus getting himself fucking arrested 😭😭😭 my dumbass husband I love him

It’s the fact he got arrested going after the people he recognised from the rally where Leta was killed 😭

Newt was trying to go after Theseus as they dragged him away but was stopped because “not here, there’s nothing we can do”

Also Jacob starting to protest about Grindelwald’s name being cleared like “I WAS THERE, HE LITERALLY MURDERED PEOPLE” and the others having to shush him

NEWT KEEPING A PHOTO OF TINA IN HIS CASE AND HIS POCKET THOUGH 😭😭😭😭

I don’t think Newtina are together by this point but there’s no inclination they are or aren’t??? It’s like “where’s Tina” “she’s busy, she’s head of the Aurors” and then her conversation with newt is basically “did you do something with you hair?” “Just for the wedding” etc. There’s no kiss, no “she’s my girlfriend/fiancée/we’re together”, it’s very confusing for me

An instruction for Bunty’s eyes only… the fact she was given important jobs AND was the one to have the Qilin at the end… so cheesey. Sorry but I can’t stand her 😭 she’s the only character I dislike to this extent. JKR wanted her to be the main girl instead of Tina so bad and it failed

(I’m still at least somewhat convinced that Bunty got such a big role because Katherine called JKR out explicitly - more so than anyone else - for her bullshit, and it’s of course just a very interesting coincidence that Bunty - whose actress sucked up to JKR during one of the transphobic tirades - is suddenly given such a big part… 👀 … anyway)

Interesting to know that Wizarding world politics is just as corrupt and fucked as muggle politics

Dumbledore talking about what Ariana used to like and Aberforth like “I WAS there, you know”, such sibling behaviour

Aberforth calling the person at the door a sod and then apologizing because “sorry for calling you a sod, Minerva” 😂

The Albus and Credence fight was actually pretty cool, not gonna lie

I noticed in the scene with Grindelwald and Yusuf Kama, Leta’s theme could be heard in the soundtrack 🤧

Yusuf Kama being a triple agent was… interesting

Bunty continuing to be cringe by making jokes that it’s her husband’s case and he’s “so forgetful that sometimes he forgets he’s married to me”, followed by the most awkward 10-15 seconds of laughter I’ve ever had to sit and witness 🤦

I’m not saying she’s a pick me girl but she kind of is???

Nahhh but why were they suddenly swarming Grindelwald like he was a rockstar 😭😂

I do love Grindelwald just rocking up to this fancy ass dinner with his top buttons undone, bow tie undone, his followers flanking him

Vinda looked fine as fUCK in her suit, by the way 👌🏻 👀

Why the house elf conducting music??? 😭😭😭 stop putting house elf slavery in, I’m-

Jacob saying the Norwegian Minister of Magic looks like his uncle 😂

Not everyone thinking Jacob was attempting to assassinate Grindelwald 😭 he’s literally a muggle, how the fuck you think he gonna use a wand??? Use your brains???

Lally looked like a QUEEN in her dress by the way

I love Queenie low-key doing a little bit of magic to stop Jacob getting hurt even as she walked away with the rest of the acolytes

Newt snatching the photo of Tina away before the jail keeper at the Erkstag could take it 😭❤️

Not me crying at the jail keeper taking Pickett and Teddy away 😭 I was laughing at them both being in Newt’s coat and him being like “he’s a pet… he’s a pet too” but then crying two seconds later at them being taken and locked away

No but the laugh I let out at Newt doing the dance was literally inhuman, I canNOT-

Newt and Theseus doing the manticore dance was one of my favourite moments. In fact all of that sequence was amazing and I wish there were more sequences like that

“I am swivelling” “I don’t think you are” - GOLDEN

The big manticore was TERRIFYING by the way, it ate people and then spit them back out

Teddy and Pickett are not the duo I expected but they’re the duo we deserve and they stole the movie 😭❤️

I’m still crying with laughter thinking about Pickett falling with Newt’s wand and the Niffler jumping up, looking like he’s about to help Pickett… and then he soars past him to grab a shit ton of gold 😂👏🏻 beautiful scene right there, 11/10

NOT THESEUS STEPPING ON A BABY MANTICORE 😭🤧

The Erkstag place is actually terrifying as a whole because the prisoners are tied upside down and they have lanterns with these little firefly things next to them, and when the lanterns go out then the big manticore at the bottom eats them before spitting the remains back up for the baby ones to eat???

Newt and Theseus realising they’re still holding hands when they had Portkey-ed to safety and immediately letting each other’s hands go LMFAO JUST SIBLING THINGS

Jacob saying he got his wand for Christmas 😂

Not the Slytherins giving Jacob a bag of Cockroach Clusters 😭😂

Jacob calling Hogwarts students “pint sized wizards” LMFAO

Dumbledore giving points to a house that’s NOT Gryffindor?!? Unheard of! 🤣

I nearly died laughing at Aberforth giving them the worst looking food to eat and Theseus immediately tucking in like “after being in that dungeon, even this tastes good to me”

So Credence is in fact Aberforth’s son?!?! Jesus Christ??? I’m not sure how I feel about that like what the fuck (his mother was just “some girl from Godric’s Hollow”)

Also confirmation that Ariana was an Obscurial! I went “oh???” When that was revealed

This is probably just because I’m sick because I felt like this film was so long… not necessarily a bad thing but I’m not well so 😭

Grindelwald straight up nearly choking Credence for failing to realize there were TWO baby Qilins though

Theseus holding the baby Qilin 😭👌🏻❤️🤧 GOODBYE MY OVARIES I CANT-

EYYYY IT’S THE ROOM OF REQUIREMENT

There were 5 cases and they all chose a random one so no one knew which one was the real case and therefore none of Grindelwald’s side could know it either

So Grindelwald killed the first Qilin baby then resurrected it so that it would bow to him at the ceremony and put him in charge??? And Newt + the gang’s main plan is to get the alive Qilin to Bhutan so the election isn’t rigged???

I do love that they kept on reiterating how pure of heart and brave Jacob is 😭

Interesting that the decoy cases, from what I could tell, were filled with stuff seemingly related to the person who randomly picked it: Jacob’s had pastries, Lally’s had books, and Theseus’ had Quidditch stuff (perhaps hinting at him being a Quidditch player at school?)

Jacob and Queenie truly couldn’t have chosen a worse time or place to have their little romantic reunion 😭 like I’m happy for them but Jesus Christ it was so poorly timed???

They’re very sweet though, and him saying that his heart isn’t full because it’s always got room for her (or something to that effect) was so beautiful

Not that bitch (whose name I can’t remember, something Fisher?) taking the case Newt had and destroying it, and he thought it was his actual case I think??? 😭

I’m sorry, I can’t believe this is a whole ass film about a Wizarding Election?!? I don’t even like thinking about real politics, let alone fantasy politics

Also they went from talking about a democratic vote to deciding “hey, let’s let the magical creature bow and choose our leader” like, excuse me??? 😭

Not Grindelwald using Crucio on Jacob 😭

No but it’s the very first thing Grindelwald does upon getting elected, torturing Jacob, and people were STILL rooting for him, what the fuck-

Credence turning to the side of good seemed kind of out of left field, I won’t lie. Like I know Dumbledore said stuff to him after their fight and Grindelwald straight up choked him but also it just seemed a little… out of nowhere?

… of course Bunty was the one with the real case. Because of course she was 🙄

I wanted to cry at the alive-Qilin seeing her zombiefied-twin and trying to talk to her, and Newt telling her “she can’t hear you” and “maybe somewhere she can hear you” 😭

I do like that they showed the British MoM, the French one from the second film, MACUSA… it was a nice little callback if nothing else

NAHHH NOT ME CRYING WHEN IT SHOWED TINA AT MACUSA WATCHING NEWT WITH THE QILIN 😭😭😭 I KNOW THE BACK OF HER ANYWHERE, EVEN BEFORE THEY SHOWED HER FACE

Not the Qilin bowing to Dumbledore, meaning he’s pure of heart 🤨 but I did laugh when he was like “… oh no no no no no-” LMFAO

THE BLOOD PACT BROKE AND GRINDELDORE HAD A FIGHT BUT DIDNT KILL EACH OTHER

Grindelwald really fell backwards off the mountain and disappeared

Look I’ll admit it’s been a while since I watched the first two films but… sometimes during the film I was like “… what is happening”, and that’s how I felt about the blood pact breaking. Like sure “he shot to harm and I shot to protect” but…? What??? Maybe I’m just stupid 😭

I’m 90% sure Credence died off screen after Aberforth took him home. It’s made very clear he’s dying but they don’t show an actual death so who knows anymore???

NEWT WAS STIMMING NEAR THE END BY RUBBING HIS COAT POCKET I CANT 😭❤️ THANK YOU EDDIE FOR THE AUTISTIC NEWT CONTENT

No but I had to try very hard not to do some hand flapping at the sight of Newt stimming, it just makes me so happy 😭❤️

Bunty: *sees a photo of Tina in Newt’s case* // Me: LMFAO sucks to be you bitch

I hope she cries at the future newtina wedding 🙃

At least she seems to accept that Newt loves Tina I guess??? If I had to say one positive about her???

Jacob and Queenie have spent however long apart and suddenly they’re getting married??? Even though in the last one he made a big deal about it being against the law??? And it’s not like they’re in England by the way, they’re still in America and the law is still very much in place against No-Maj and magical mixing????

I love Queenie teasing Newt like “you’re nervous for another reason, aren’t you?” (Because he’s going to see Tina at the wedding)

Queenie’s dress and head piece was… a thing. She looked beautiful but it’s not something I’d personally wear myself

Newt being Jacob’s best man at the wedding and worrying over his best man speech was content I didn’t know I needed 😭 I kind of wish we could have heard the speech!

THE NEWTINA SCENE WAS THE FUCKING MOST AMAZING SCENE BY THE WAY

Tina is maid of honour 😭❤️

THE USE OF “Newt says goodbye to Tina” (aka THE Newtina theme), I was SOBBING

I’m still so bloody mad that Tina’s only scenes were 1) her just looking at the election broadcast at MACUSA (no lines) and 2) the wedding at the bakery. I mean yeah there’s the photo but still???

She looked fab as fuck, and I love her and Lally hugging but… yeah.

Small thing, my sister said Katherine looked extremely skinny in the film and I don’t know if that’s due to COVID or not, but… anyway.

Newt, Theseus and Jacob in their suits 👌🏻

I’m pretty sure Theseus made a comment to Newt before entering the bakery that just screamed: “… you’ve complimented how everyone looks BUT me” 😂 I can’t remember the exact comment but I’m pretty sure it happened

Cannot believe the approximately 15 people getting up and walking out before the credits even rolled 😤 like there were 30 seconds left and NOW you get up and leave?!?

Okay but who the fuck invited Bunty to the wedding when she barely fucking knows Jacob and Queenie??? And she turned up late???

The soundtrack had mostly pieces from the first film, a couple from the second, and then some Harry Potter soundtrack in there

My sister isn’t really a fan of the films but she has seen them and she didn’t like it 😭 she said it felt like it dragged and was super slow (and sometimes I admit that I felt that way a little bit too but whatever)

If nothing else, the film has made me want to jump back into writing newtina fics in a way that the first film did and the second film didn’t, so yay!!!

There’s a song (like a song with lyrics) that plays when Jacob is in the bakery thinking of Queenie and again at the wedding and then again over the end credits, and it’s called “Heaven” by Gregory Porter - it’s the official Jacob/Queenie song, let’s be honest!

So… to be honest, this felt very much like a final film. The blood pact thing is resolved, Credence knows who he is and is most likely dead (at the very least, he’s dying), Jacob and Queenie are married… I don’t know. It feels like it’s a final film but also enough there that there could be more films, if that makes sense. I feel like WB are planning to see what the box office/reception is before continuing forwards, to be honest, and I don’t know how to feel about it.

I really hope it’s not a final film because I would admittedly like to see more Tina, more Newt, more Newtina, and also that final duel between Grindelwald and Dumbledore. Despite how much I whine and complain, I’ll be very upset if this is where it comes to an end because this series does still mean a lot to me. It was definitely a HUGE improvement on the second film - in fact, this would probably be my favourite of the three if not for the severe lack of Tina.

I do want to watch it again, when I’m NOT sick and when I’m mentally ready again because mentally I’m all over the place at the moment, especially if this ends up being the last one. I wholeheartedly recommend the film though, I truly do, and I look forward to hearing what other fans say!

[houseofpinkboombox]

I am still in my feelings about the Fantastic Beasts films. The fact the JK did THAT to fantastic beasts in stead of giving us the Steve Irwin of magic is something I'll never get over.

A British woman did my LEAST favorite thing that British folks do and commented on American politics and poorly.

Like image well meaning himbo vs poachers and a bureaucrat that's anti magical creatures because she's terrified of them. It writes itself.

You can even have a super strong conservation message especially with what was going on in England during the 1920's in just 30 years from then they would have a fog crisis. Do the beginnings of that.

You want it to tie into the Grinderwal/Dumbledore story? Do that you want us to know that Grinderwal bad? Good thing the Nazi party was forming at that time and nationalism was on the rise, good thing the war that you used as a back drop had a fucking weirdo that hated Jews and loved magic stuff that wouldn't have been easy as shit to write or anything.

I know she wanted to make Newt like calm and quite she thinks that's charming and she things it says something that masculinity in general but has any of them met a fucking zoologist? They dead ass all act like Steve Irwin, they're loud, personal boundaries what even are those? and they're all so sweet, zero fear of shit that could rip your head off. They're wonderful, and I'm speaking as someone that worked at the wild animal park. Every time a zoo keeper was in the break room you knew it.

Writing FB because she was charmed by Johnny Depp into buying his boat when he had money troubles.... like girl.... what is you doing? Like his speech and why Queenie where their where are odds with eachother, then she has a stolen election with a dude that just escaped prison but the Americans on sight folks all the time? Joanne girl what is you doing?

TL:DR fantastic beasts should have been about not burning our world down not a stolen election.

[aethelar]

For @notquitenewt and for Pride, in response to JK’s recent tweets.

Graves would like to say he went out in a blaze of glory. Fighting to the end, embodying everything he stood for - he faced Grindelwald and came out standing, didn’t he, snarling and angry and more determined than ever to find the injustice that made a man like that able to exist and stamp it the fuck out. People wouldn’t turn to Grindelwald unless something was wrong. Evil doesn’t exist in a vacuum. Things need to change, and Graves limped and dragged and clawed his way back to MACUSA with his eyes wide open said finally, now that the rest of you fucks have seen where your intolerance leads, give me what I’ve been asking for for the past twenty years and let me change it.

He didn’t do it alone. A magizoologist who thought in a way people didn’t understand. A legilimens who heard minds in a way people were scared of. A no-maj baker who didn’t have magic but didn’t let that stop him. A junior auror who stood by what was right and got fired for it, and still didn’t learn to shut up and fall in line like she was expected to. He wasn’t alone.

But still. Graves didn’t go out in a blaze of glory. He limped and dragged and clawed his way, and then he came to a train station and lowered himself to sit on the floor with his back against one of the smooth white pillars that held up the roof, and he tipped his head forward in exhaustion and gave up.

He sees Newt before he hears him. A pair of shoes appearing beside him, yellow-black-yellow socks because Newt was always loyal at heart. His feet make no sound, or maybe they do and the station muffles it, and he arranges himself in a cross-legged untidyness next to Graves, and waits.

“I’m sorry,” Graves says, eventually, after the silence has settled into something comfortable. “I tried.”

“Why are you sorry?” Newt asks. “It’s not your fault.”

He grimaces. It’s not about blame. “I’m sorry the world’s so shit then,” he says. “And I’m sorry I wasn’t enough to fix it.”

“The world’s not all shit. Have you ever heard a phoenix sing?”

No. He hasn’t. Nor has he heard a fwooper sing, though he’s seen Newt’s flittering around his case enough times. Their song drives people mad. They’re illegal in America, still, but apparently in England you could own them as pets so long as you kept them under permanent silencing charms so they couldn’t sing.

Newt’s wasn’t under a silencing charm. It wasn’t on the fwooper not to sing, Newt said. It was made to sing. It wasn’t on the fwooper not to sing, it was on the people to not be driven mad. Then he’d grinned and handed Graves a pair of earmuffs, pink and fluffy because the fwooper was pink and fluffy and it amused him to make them match. It’s not the same as hearing a phoenix sing, but it’s a happy memory all the same, light hearted and simple and such an easy way to make the world better if only people would listen.

People don’t listen. Graves’ smile falls. “A few good things don’t make up for all the bad.”

“A few bad things can’t tarnish all the good,” Newt counters, and Graves shoots a sour look at the ground in front of him.

“It feels like the bad’s in everthing,” he says. “The foundation’s wrong. Our society was built on prejudice - the muggles believe in gods that make the world, if there was a god that made ours she’d be a racist prick. She’d think everyone was born in neat little box, divided up into magic and non magic and male and female and good and bad as though that’s all there is, as though people can’t grow, or change, or fucking be. That’s all people want. They’re not asking for much, they just want to be allowed to exist.” His voice has been rising, but here it goes hollow. This is why he’s tired. “How is it too much to ask to be allowed to exist,” he says, though it isn’t a question. “I don’t want to be part of a world made by a god like that.”

There’s quiet. Graves traces the marks in the white stone floor with his fingers, the dips where it’s worn down like thousands of feet have stampeded through the wall he’s sat against and rushed with excited joy to a meet the world. The shit world. He aches, suddenly, for the way they must feel when they learn the truth. No one should have to be betrayed like that.

“Grindelwald is defeated,” Newt says. His voice sounds odd, not quite like Newt. “After he’s gone, there’s a new dark lord. He’s defeated too, then he comes back, then he’s defeated again.”

“Why bother? If it follows the pattern there’ll just be another one.”

“If it follows the pattern the other one will be defeated too,” Newt-not-Newt answers, as though it were a simple fact, as though, given enough time, good would always win. “People thought the heroes did it,” he continues. “But they didn’t. Grindelwald had an army, and an army faced him. The one after him - people fought him with jokes, and radio shows, and learning that everything they’d been taught growing up was wrong and that they had to be better than the world expected them to be. Everyone thought it came down to the last battle, the last spell the hero cast, but it didn’t. It was everything leading up to that. All the ways that people looked at what he represented and said no, said he was wrong, said they weren’t going to let him dictate the world they lived in.”

He sounds certain. Like he lived through it. He doesn’t sound like Newt. When Graves tilts his head to the side and looks up at him, he’s both surprised and not surprised to see someone else there, messy-haired and short and somehow not as young as he looks.

He turns to Graves, frowning, serious and calm with the faintest hints of an anger Graves recognises simmering underneath. “Maybe there is a god,” he says. "Maybe she created the world and made parts of it wrong, but I don’t think she matters. It’s our world. She can say where it starts but she can’t tell us where it goes, and there’s no such thing as a neat little box to put someone in. People choose who they are.”

“How are we meant to choose,” Graves asks, “If the world won’t fucking listen?”

“I listen. Newt listens. There are a lot of people I could have chosen to appear to you as, and they listen. One person at a time we’ll keep listening until we outnumber the world. You are who you are, and that won’t change if people are too stupid to see it.”

Graves bites his lip, looking away. There’s a train in the station now, one that wasn’t there before. He’s been angry at the world for so long, for the way it knocks people down, the way he can fight and bare his teeth and scream at it to do better and it doesn’t, and now he’s tired and he feels like every new piece of hatred and bigotry is leeching everything out of life that he wanted to fight for in the first place, but.

But.

He has Newt, doesn’t he. And Queenie. Tina. Jacob. The world might be shit. The individuals aren’t. If he takes the train, if he’s exhausted and he can’t go on, they’ll keep going for him. They aren’t the only ones.

Graves doesn’t believe in gods. New York is his city. The wizarding world is his world. Fuck anyone who tries to take that away from him.

He turns to the master of death, scowl sitting on his face like it belongs there. “I’m not going to take the train,” he says. “I’m not done. Send me back.”

The master of death hums, but there’s a faint smile in the corner of his mouth. “You were pretty badly hurt,” he points out. “You had to be to end up here, and I’m only here to talk. I can’t stop you bleeding.”

Graves sets his jaw and raises his chin combatitively. “Hurt is not dead.” Besides, he wasn’t there by himself, and the others knew enough healing spells to put him back together. The others. The ones who would keep going if he couldn’t, the ones who will pick him up and support him when he falters. It settles, warm, right. He’s not alone. He doesn’t have to fight by himself. One by one until they outnumber the world, he’s not fucking alone.

Around him, the station wavers. The white starts breaking up and fragmenting; white light is made of all the colours, and it glitters over him like a rainbow. The master of death smiles, grin showing teeth, and maybe they’re from different times and maybe Graves will never meet him again but here, again, he’s not alone.

He wakes up. He didn’t go out in a blaze of glory. Newt leans over him, pale-faced and wide-eyed, spells pouring from his lips in a steady stream and hands bloody as he keeps him together, and Graves didn’t go out in a blaze of glory because whichever capricious god rules the world she’s not enough to stop him and he didn’t go out.

“I’m up,” he says, levering himself to a sitting position. “I’m good. I’m going to punch a bigot in the face.”

Newt chokes out a wet laugh. “Jacob’s already there,” he says. “I think Tina skipped punching and threw a car.” He doesn’t stop casting his spells or pressing against the wound in his side, and Graves pauses to consider. Bigots need punching. So long as someone’s doing it, then he can take a bit of a breather until he’s healed enough to join in.

He’ll need something big though. If Tina’s throwing cars, he can’t let himself be one-upped. On the other hand, there’s something just so satisfying about punching bigots in the face, it’s a tough choice.

Wait. No it’s not. There’s no little boxes and there’s no either or.

He’s going to do both.

[nemo-of-house-hamartia]

Vicki Nelson, Queenie, Lamae Bal if you pleeease my vampire lady

GOOD DAY, MY DARLING ANI, MY KING.

ALLOW ME TO WELCOME YOU TO MY MODEST ABODE!😂 *cackles*

I AM AT YOUR SERVICE.

Allow me to answer the questions you brought me, for they are most intriguing!

Vicki Nelson: Would you rather be an artist or music virtuoso?

AH!

AH-AH! *lightbulb lits up*

That's an interesting question, because, if I have to choose between being an artist (something that I already somewhat am, if only to a very amateurish level), and a music virtuoso, I would DEFINITELY go with being a music virtuoso. Music reaches to my soul in a way that no other media can, it truly creates a bridge between my most inner self and the world outside and opens doors that I didn't even know I had. So, to be able to become a Virtuoso, it would mean the whole world to me. So, VIRTUOSO IT IS!

Queeny: If you were in a vampire band, what genre would you choose? Bonus: What instrument would you play?

*cackles like a hen, because yesyesyesyesyesyesyeysyesyesyes, this is my jam, literally*

If I were in a vampire band, the genre I would choose would definitely be PURE ROCK. I know, I know, I love and adore Symphonic Metal, but Rock (and Hard Rock and Blues Rock in particular) was the true first genre I was exposed to, and the one that stuck with me the longest, before transitioning in Heavy Metal and eventually landing in Symphonic. So, unsurprisingly, A VAMPIRE ROCK BAND, and we would call ourselves "THE FRUITY BATS". (lemme just say that Lestat WILL NOT be part of this band tho. That man is already a primadonna as it is, he doesn't need incentive! 😂 JK JK)

As for what instrument I would play....

*GRABS ELECTRIC GUITAR*

*TICKLES THE STRINGS*

*PLAYS "LAYLA" OPENING RIFF BECAUSE FUCK YES.

(or I would go with the bass as well. Either way, I am picking those strings like there is no tomorrow).

Lamae Bal: Would you kill humans if you fed from them, or live in harmony?

I would most definitely NOT even FEED from humans, because oh my gods, no.

NA-HA.

I would straight away embrace the Cullen way and drink animal blood (EXCEPT I WOULDN'T SPARKLE, BECAUSE I AM NOT A GODDAMN FAIRY. *throws glitters in the air*) . Anyway, I would most definitely try to live in harmony with humans, without causing any sort of problem!😂

Thank you so much for these asks, because omg I loved them so so much. SO SO MUCH.

Now, with your permission, my King, I need to go and be all brooding and dramatic and shit.

(and yes, I know these are the Volturi from "Breaking Dawn", BUT I NEEDED A GIF WITH VAMPIRES, AND I LOVE MICHAEL SHEEN, HIS ARO WAS TOO FUN TO WATCH AND ANYWAY MICHAEL IS THE ONLY SHEEN WE STAN IN THIS HOUSE. *recoils at Charlie Sheen*)

--Nemo

[ronweasleyisourking]

Why I Don’t Find Jokes That Claim “Actually, X wrote Harry Potter” Funny

In the wake of Joanne Rowling yet again being openly transphobic on Twitter, a common joke is going around, and the layout of the joke is basically just “[Insert name] wrote Harry Potter,” and the names have varied from Nobody to Luna Lovegood to Daniel Radcliffe, etcetera, etcetera. But what a lot of people making these jokes don’t seem to understand is that this bigotry is not new, that Rowling’s bigotry is all throughout her books, and that saying someone else wrote these books means you believe they have these bigoted views too. And I don’t really find that funny.

I understand that you might be wondering, “What bigoted views played a part in the Harry Potter books? I don’t remember anything wrong.” That’s okay! I’ll be happy to outline some of the issues of the books. So, that’s what I’ll be talking about in this post:  

Firstly, anti-semetism

English folklore has always been rooted in anti-semetism, their descriptions being based off Jewish stereotypes, and this does not stop with Harry Potter where the goblins are cast as the overprotective bankers of Gringotts, following the stereotype that Jewish people (and Goblins, being based off them) are greedy. This trend also does not stop in the books or original series. Ron Perlman (a Jewish actor) play a half-goblin in the Jewish mafia in the first Fantastic Beasts movie, continuing the questionable and problematic connection between Jewish people and goblins in Harry Potter. 

“But the entire series is supposed to be a parallel to the Holocaust, and the muggleborns (who step into the role of Jewish people in this parallel) are the good guys, how can she be anti-semetic?” Let’s turn again to the Fantastic Beasts movies, that she wrote the screenplays of, specifically to the character of Queenie Goldstein. In December of 2014, Joanne revealed that Anthony Goldstein was a Jewish wizard at Hogwarts and from that we can can reasonably conclude that Tina and Queenie were also Jewish. Which wouldn’t have been a questionable decision if not for the fact that a canon Jewish women (Queenie) ended up joining the side of Gellert Grindelwald (who is supposed to be a parallel to Hitler). What the fuck is up with that?

There’s also an issue with house elves and racism but that is a much bigger issue that would require a lot more of my time and research before I would feel comfortable writing about it, plus it deserves a post of it’s own. 

Secondly, “canon” gay characters

I don’t mind that there weren’t any gay characters in the books, I really don’t. What I do mind is JK Rowling going in after the fact to say that there were gay characters. It’s unnecesary and honestly, she chooses the worst rep. First of all, she revealed Albus Dumbledore as gay in 2007, a character that manipulates things and people to his own benefit throughout the series and leaves a child in an abusive home, despite undoubtingly having the power to protect him. The second character she reveals as gay though is Gellert Grindelwald, who, as I said before is supposed to parallel Hitler, who was the face of the Holocaust and led to the deaths of hundreds of gay and effeminate men during that time. And the fact that she continues to refuses to show it in canon, despite having a whole new movie series about the rivalry between the two only makes it worse.

Another thing that has gone around in the Harry Potter fandom is the fact (or rumor) that Joanne once said in an interview that she considered making Dean and Seamus gay but that it would “take attention” away from the trio but one, I cannot find this interview anywhere, and two, believing that a background gay couple would have taken attention away from the main characters is not great. 

If she wanted gay characters, she should have included them in the texts. Otherwise, I think she needs to stop trying to get brownie points for representation that she didn’t write. 

Thirdly, werewolves

Joanne Rowling released an ebook in September of 2016 where she wrote that werewolves in the books, like Remus, were a metaphor for illnesses that carry a stigma, listing HIV/Aids as an example. This again was a questionable choice, seeing as HIV/Aids is a common problem in the LGBTQ+ community and the other main werewolf in the books, Fenrir Greyback, targeted children which follows the stereotype that gay men are predators.

And finally, these characters

Nagini. While I know that many people believe that this wasn’t actually planned as Joanne said it was, the etymology of her name does trace back to the Naag or Naagin, semi-divine half-human, half-snake creatures from mythology in South Asian cultures, meaning it might have actually been planned. But the problem is not whether it was planned or not, the problem is that Nagini is a woman of color (who is Korean, meaning she is East Asian not South Asian)  cursed to live as an animal who spends the last years of her life as the servant of a white man who is equated with Nazis and whose eventual fate is tied to his. 

Rita Skeeter. Rita is described as having a heavy jaw, thick fingers, and large and masculine hands, and with Joanne being openly transphobic, it’s not hard to make the connection of where she might have gotten the inspiration for this character from, and the fact that she transforms her body to spy on children brings to mind a certain tweet that Rowling liked a while ago that described trans women as “foxes pretending to be hens to get in the hen house.” The idea that trans people are predators who spy on others is a harmful stereotype and this description and characterization of Rita Skeeter does not help.

Cho Chang. Cho Chang is a Chinese character who has two surnames for a name, meaning there was little thought put into her chracter’s name. Honestly, it’s not that hard to find out whether or not “Cho” is a first name, it’s just one quick search away from not being in the wrong. That and the fact that Cho, along with Sue Li and Padma Patil (some of the only Asian characters in the books), were all placed in Ravenclaw, or “the smart house” just shows how little thought that Rowling gave her canonically poc characters. 

Seamus Finnigan. I only recently realized the issues of this character, and it’s likely that most people wouldn’t know why this was a problem, but consider why an English women in the nineties (at the height of The Troubles and the English/Irish conflict) would write the one known Irish character in the books as untrusting of the English (of all of Harry’s friend, Seamus was the one who didn’t believe Harry in book five). Not only that, but in the films (which she was largely involved in) characterized Seamus as clumsy and explosive and a bit of a pyro, which are sterotypical Irish traits, and she didn’t question it at all? 

Conclusion

These are just a few of the issues seen in the Harry Potter books and movies and I didn’t even talk about the issues that are less bigotry and more simply problematic, like Viktor Krum’s character, or the theme of forgiving abusive people in your life, or the constant issue of love potions and consent.

There is so much wrong in the books and we can’t just ignore them or transfer them to another person. Joanne Rowling wrote these books and her bigoted beliefs are abundantly clear in them and we all need to accept that. We can love the worldbuilding and the characters and yes, even the story, but we must recongnize the issues in them and we must realize that a bigoted person wrote it. There is no escaping that. 

And yes, as everyone who I have expressed this two has brought up, the story does belong to the fans. And we can do whatever we wish with it, but we should never forget where the story began and we shouldn’t try and pretend that it had a different origin. Death of the author, or the idea that anybody's interpretation of the text is a valid interpretation, and that the author's interpretation is not the only one that counts, does not mean that the author is literally removed from the text. They still wrote it. And their bias (opinions) are still a huge part of the text. And we can try with all our might to remove their bias from our fanworks but it is still there in the original text. So, yes, the story belongs to fans. But the bias in it belongs to the author and will always be present.

The author of the Harry Potter series is JK Rowling, no matter how bigoted she and her beliefs are. We should never forget that.

[moriartyjams]

please everyone ignore the fact that harry potter exists in my head but 

1. fantastic beasts / newt’s character would be much more appealing if they explored the fact that he thinks the ministry of magic is corrupt and shitty (acab). him and dumbledore have expressed that the ministry is bad due to the violence they project to grindewald’s followers even though his followers believe in basic rights (non-magic/magic folks marrying, class equality, etc.). his followers have specifically said there isn’t any more time to be peaceful to get their causes legalized because working within the system does not work. 

2. grindewald’s followers are willing to kill people who don’t agree with them. while this seems unnecessary, the people they have killed have been cops (ppl working for the ministry of magic) and the rich (that one family that grindewald’s followers killed and then they like. stole their condo or smth). 

3. the problem that newt + friends should have with grindewald is not his belief in equality or the fact that he’s willing to kill members of the ruling class for it. it’s his underlying power hungry need to rule over non-magic ppl + obtain power. in the end, newt “acab” scamander’s consistent disdain for cops is not consistently expressed. he is in love w tina + leta and also has great love for his brother theseus. he chooses to side w the ministry in the end !! and the fact that grindewald believes in equality and that he got queenie (a very close friend of newt !!) to join his side bc she wanted to get married to the love of her life without getting antagonized is just.. not mentioned again ?? the movie series would be SO MUCH better if they actually talked abt the rights theyre trying to obtain a bit more <333 (jk this movie series isnt redeemable ! fuck terfs) 

4. anyways, fantastic beasts is VERY problematic bc all the characters of color exist to serve the white characters (nagini and leta as free emotional labor not getting anything for themselves) or barely get any development (leta’s half brother + all the token poc supporting cast) +++ fags are antagonized as heartless ++ the women not really getting any consistent storylines + the other disgusting things jk rowling does to any of her tropes. do not give her your money! 

5. anyways fantastic beasts is anti-leftist propaganda. 

also newt gives eco-fascist vibes bc one time he said “the most cruel creatures in the world... humans” like stfu do you mean white ppl?? 

[dislocatedsourdough]

Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes Of Grindlewald

I couldn't give two shits about this piss poor movie.

Allow me to explain. The actors were amazing, they played their given parts very well. I'm not going to short change them in the slightest. There's a reason Eddie Redmayne has 11 awards for his acting. Johnny Depp doesn't receive 21 awards just for the hell of it. Zoe Kravitz doesn't need my blessing for her acting career when she's been nominated for 9 awards and has won 2. They did the absolute best with the script (which isn't that bad) they were given.

The CGI was exceptional in my opinion, though I must admit I don't have much knowledge on computer animation in the slightest. I just know that, from a layman's perspective, it looked good.

What I do have a problem with is the storyline. If this wasn't a sequel to Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them, I probably wouldn't be so up in arms. But it IS. The previous character building of Tina, Queenie, and of Jacob amounted to absolutely nothing in this movie. Tina's character is there for the romance aspect, having no true focus in this shitty excuse of a plot. Queenie, the lovely Queenie, has a total of what, two fucking lines? And Jacob, my sweet little Jacob, was brought back from obliteration to pay witness to no one caring about him at all. Maybe I wouldn't have been so pissed off if they had just left out the three of them altogether, but no. They brought them back just for them to have zero impact on the movie whatsoever. Fuck that shit.

I adore Jude Law, love him and his work to bits, but they waisted him. For them to throw him into the mix wouldn't have been so bad if they had simply LEFT HIM OUT OF THE WHOLE GRINDLEWALD-LOVES-ME-AND-I-LOVE-HIM-DESPITE-WHAT-A-PIECE-OF-SHIT-HE-IS part. To imply a romance subtext without actually giving a fucking backstory on it is a poor decision. It gives a reason why he couldn't have killed Grindlewald, I suppose, but that could've been done in a different, more sensical, manner. We didn't need it. We didn't ask for it. We fucking hated it. Pardon my assumptions, but what the HELL were they thinking? Nowhere in the original Harry Potter movies was Dumbledore ever addressed as gay. If it did, I'd get it, embrace it, maybe even love it. And sure, this whole subplot may be a request by JK Rowling herself, but she's not exactly the best fucking person either. I mean, she can't just automatically add a subtext that wasn't there to begin with. What's she playing at? Jesus

Anyways, I have a ton more that I absolutely despise about this movie, but I think it'd be best for everyone if I retire for the evening.

And listen, if you like the movie and all that it addresses and concerns, then so be it. My opinion doesn't invalidate your own. You can love this movie for all I care, I might not get it, but it's whatever.

[chicleeblair]

Just got back from seeing The Crimes of Grindlewald. I am totally opinion-dumping, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to know other thoughts. I want to know what other people thing! I could be wrong about things!

A FEW NON-SPOILERY THOUGHTS (UNLESS YOU THINK ALL THOUGHTS ARE SPOILERS):

I liked Newt’s creatures. I loved the Niffler. He needs a name, though.

WHY IS EVERYONE WEARING SUITS? DID WIZARDS FORGET HOW TO WEAR SUITS BETWEEN THE 1930s AND 1991?

Eddie Redmayne is precious. He is flawed. He has made poor role choices. I love him. 

say gay JK

SPOILERS AHEAD

.

I wanted this movie to surprise me. I really did. I wanted Nagini to prefer the snake body, for owning that to be part of her from the start, to know it wasn’t a curse. Anything that didn’t make her a prop for a boy’s story, and set her up to eventually be companionless but for a megalomaniac whose life is so tied to hers that she must be beheaded by a child for the evil to die. It will feel wrong to me, no matter where we go from here, because hse was exoticised and nothing but a means for Credence to escape someone who didn’t seem to be trying all that hard to hold him. 

Queenie’s storyline also royally pissed me off. There wasn’t any nuance, simply an, oh hey I met this man yesterday, he didn’t call me crazy, and he told me he beleives in inter-magical relationships, so he must be legit! I thught maybe she’d be enchanted, like Jacob at the beginning—which, fine, she’s willing to enchant him but it felt OOC—or that she’d realize that Grindlewald said what she wanted to hear, or—something. Anything but the Jewish-coded character with magical mental illness becoming a pawn of wizard-Hitler. And the analogue between Hitler and Grindlewald is too strong for anyone to try to sell me on her being the “oppressed ifghting back” or whatever. She’s not coded as the German citizien who didn’t know what was going on, she’s coded as one of those hurt, and I didn’t’t buy her storyline. Rowling needed someone to cross the line, and Tina wouldn’t, Jacob couldn’t, so Queenie was left. It’s unnecessary. 

And that doesn’t get into the fact that Jacob calling her “crazy” at the beginning was actually dealt with really well, but then at the end we’re set up to think he’s right for saying that, because she IS being irrational, and that’s simply not helpful. I don’t know, all I can say is if she isn’t a double-agent lickity-split I will be….Angrier than I am. 

A lot of it felt unnecessary.

I don’t like the Credence reveal. I don’t think the whole Harry Potter franchise needs to be the Dumbledore McDumbledore, but hey we can’t say gay “like brothers" my ass Chronicles. Like I see what you were doing there, you want us to think about DD having a brother, and his sister died, but a brother because apparently ABERFORTH DOESN’T EVEN MATTER, and does he ever even KNOW about Credence? Because either:

A. He sent Credence away?! 

B. Credence was his father’s illegitimate baby, and DD didn’t know. (Related to the Azkaban stint? Are Obscurus genetic now????)

C. Kendra somehow had another kid? Is she the one on the boat? She has Native American blood, right? Why be taking him to America, with her other children still in England? And isn’t she dead before this? And Papa DD before that?

Someone get me a timeline. 

And it all begs the question: If Credence really is a long-lost sibling (which, I’m sorry, Mark Evans made far more fucking sense than this shit) WHY DOES GRINDLEWALD KNOW, BUT APPARENTLY NO ONE ELSE? I know Rita Skeeter isn’t the best reporter evah, but she did seem to dig up all the possible dirt!

Young Dumbledore was great. For all that this doesn’t need to be The Dumbledore McDumbledore Chronicles, the way he was written and played absolutely felt to me like a Dumbledore who hasn’t battled his bestie brother lover yet, and but will become that man. He is a Chess Master learning to become a Chess God. 

He is ALSO GAY

There are ways the story of Newt’s involvement in the inter-continental politics of the Grindlewald era could be told without constantly harping on storylines out of The Life and Times. The Lestrange stuff was so powerful, why not delve deeper into that?

Why not delve more into the world of Magical Paris, like we (sort of) did with New York in the first film? Fine, Grindlewald hates Paris and the end is at Père Lachaise. It could’ve been ANYWHERE. We were mostly indoors. Where was the architecture, the horticulture, the FASHION. 

I loved the flashback scene (Autistic Newt is Autistic). I loved Leta, and while I didn’t like the mixed-race woman dying—and oh wow the non-evil girl from the stereotypically-evil family is mixed-race. JK you are NOT subtle—I did respect her sacrifice and liked that she wasn’t evil simply because of her name. I also REALLY enjoyed that we got some nuance to Newt’s relationship to Theseus. It wasn’t a good/evil dichotomy, no one stole anyone else’s girl. I want more about Leta and her brothers, and their different upbringings, and the cultural differences, and….

Wow, POC in the background, this should not be notable!

How did Rabastian and Rudolphus Lestrange happen????? All the male heirs are dead, unless somehow the baby didn’t die, or Credence is actually the baby, or I don’t know, Thesus fucking takes Leta’s name and his kids are Death Eaters?? Am I missing a Lestrange line here? 

MORE MAGICAL CULTURES.

I DO NOT FEEL LIKE I GOT MAGICAL PARIS. AT FUCKING ALL.  

If the miscommunication between Tina and Newt had gone on HALF A DAMN SECOND longer I would’ve cut someone. 

Did muggle Paris just NOT NOTICE that shit? We didn’t have magical bird rain this time…. 

How TF do you get a half-elf in this world.

How did the circus get a house-elf?

Why wasn’t the servant a damn goblin?

Why did we barely learn anyone’s name? JK is usually obsessed with names. Like the whole damn thing is about names....

Grindlewald did not have to be Johnny Depp. He wasn’t a classic Depp character, which makes the decision to keep him on even more bizarre. 

YOU CAN SAY GAY, IT’LL BE OKAY. 

Why spend all that time with the damn baby only to have a follower kill him and that be it? Why not set Grindlewald up as the less brutal megalomaniac who DOESN’T kill babies, and help us see while people fell for his ruse initially?

I liked young Minerva, though I always head canon her as being Tom Riddle’s age, I know she’s not. 

Why was Nicholas Flammel the Walking Corpse a thing??? Like, what did he bring that ANYONE else couldn’t do?  

I liked Jacob in this one. Jacob is good and can stay. 

Honestly, I want AU fic now please. So much AU fic. I, in fact, plan to write one, like, tomorrow. 

SAY GAY JK 

SAY GAY JK

#SAYGAYJK