#fuck it— I think it’s FUNNY
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my coworker and I just got reamed by our boss for a small kitchen fire that happened the other day… while he was in Cuba… and then proceeds to ask us why we didn’t call him about it… while he was in Cuba…
#listen— this man 5’3– several inches shorter than me#I always make sure I fix my posture to be taller than him bc I know his height bothers him#but anyway— he comes back and proceeds to go off WORSE on my coworker#who is only three months in so at least he’s past the probationary period#whereas I’m five years in#but like DUDE YOURE IN CUBA WITH NO CELL SERVICE ANSJDLSAKD#why the FUCK would I call you anyway when you probably wouldn’t know how to deal with it besides calling 911??#lmao it was a little grease fire and it wasn’t the first time either#it’s a kitchen like… what do you expect lol#I’m just annoyed tho#pissed that he treated a new employee like that and painted a bad picture of himself as a boss#fuck it— I think it’s FUNNY#and lowkey I hope I one day get fired from here rather than quitting#bc I have sooooo much dirt on this place lmao#and it’s from a big hotel chain so I think it’s even funnier#✦ niicevibe.
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Y'all I know that when so-called AI generates ridiculous results it's hilarious and I find it as funny as the next guy but I NEED y'all to remember that every single time an AI answer is generated it uses 5x as much energy as a conventional websearch and burns through 10 ml of water. FOR EVERY ANSWER. Each big llm is equal to 300,000 kiligrams of carbon dioxide emissions.
LLMs are killing the environment, and when we generate answers for the lolz we're still contributing to it.
Stop using it. Stop using it for a.n.y.t.h.i.n.g. We need to kill it.
Sources:
#unforth rambles#fuck ai#llms#sorry but i think this every time I see a reblog with more haha funny answers#how many tries did it take to generate the absurd#how many resources got wasted just to prove what we already know - that these tools are a joke#please stop contributing to this
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she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.
my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.
my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.
my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.
at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.
my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.
i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.
two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.
it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.
#writeblr#wlw#i often think about like.....#being happy in a gay relationship is sometimes so odd#bc u can forget how stupid ppl are.#bc ur so USED to being gay. and u forget other people GENUINELY ARE homophobic#so it's like. girl pardon?????#but also there are moments where it's like. ohhh the kids are alright#like watching someone razz someone else.... so fucking wholesome#“lemme get this bitche's pronouns before i make gentle fun of them” .... i would have KILLED for that.#THAT is how u know ur accepted#not just tolerated#..... when ppl are like. sure ur nonbinary congrats but WHAT is this fucking sunscreen application#ps idk if "razz'' is a real word but someone asked what it means -#i've always heard it as being a term for 'gentle & friendly teasing'' which like#i personally notice more from my guy friends but is like - when a person isn't#LIKE ACTUALLY teasing u (it's nothing personal/mean) they're just laughing w/you about something#my friends often put on a little voice and call me an anemic little bitch#like 'ooooo the anemic little bitch is cold??? does she need a mouse blanket#bc she's SOOOO SMALL AND ANEMIC???''#and it doesn't hurt my feelings (it makes me laugh very hard) bc 1. i actually called MYSELF that first#and 2. i'm not sensitive about it!!!#a proper razz is when you are ALSO in on the joke - i ALSO think it's funny#for some people i personally find that when they razz u it's when they love u -#they've noticed something genuine about u and love u enough that u know they're not being mean#this is cultural and personality based of course but i'm hispanic#if someone isn't making fun of me it means they hate me . obviously.
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psst. guys did you hear. they made up a new game that everyone you know suddenly got really really into in the span of a day and you never heard anything at all about it prior
#noonbeam rambles#noonbeam thinks theyre funny#THIS POST IS ABOUT MOUTHWASHING GUYS WHAT THE FUCK IS MOUTHWASHING /silly#many such cases ................. [bg3. parkciv. i cant think of anything else rn]
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they are Cancelling me for dealing with my grief as best i can . also for the vicious war Crimes
#book 24#the conversation between the gods at the beginning there is just this#greatest hits#all i say is vicious war crimes in a vague way#and you all start frothing at the mouth like rabid dogs#a lot of yall get the memo with the blorbo tags but also. seeing quite a few strange pulls#not exactly war crimes but Ok#sometimes normal vicious crimes can just be normal vicious crimes ok guys#can yall stop tagging this as israel u guys r fucking weird….#if u see this and think it is a joke about actual fucking horrific war crimes and ethnic cleansing. u may be fucked up in the head#please be normal#will people stop commenting on this please. none of yall r funny#legendary warrior
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had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
#normally I don't chronicle my dreams here but fucking hell that one was funny#I think this would genuinely make tumblr better tbh#@ staff do this cowards#spy has thoughts#my life is a sitcom and i am my own laugh track#functional website#spy's smash hits#Glock function#edit for everyone in the notes saying 'everyone clapped'#I know I can't prove to you that it happened for real you're just gonna have to trust me on this#but I swear on my goddamn life I'm not making this up#I make so many conscious puns that sometimes my subconscious cooks up a real good one
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got irl jumpscared while boothing
#moutwashing fanart#curly mouthwashing#comifuro 19#mouthwashing#so fucking funny its been 2 days and i still think abt this#have yet to find the actl cosplayer tho T___T come back to me...
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#Homestuck#Dirk strider#dave strider#roxy lalonde#rose lalonde#karkat vantas#This is dumb but i thought itd be funny#shhhh dont think about the setting its nebulous#Also#first time drawing karkat#i think hes p cute#also he has a nasty case of needs fucking glasses
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Personally I think that Azula should have been redeemed simply so that she can become Zuko's horrible little advisor who whispers evil little plans to him so that he can do the exact opposite
#the only reason she gets this job is bc he doesnt trust her anywhere else in the palace#its like enrichment for manipulative girls#also so that he can set her on asshole deligates like a rabid little lapdog#she just has mean fuckin pomeranian energy that thing bites then lights you on fire w flames so hot theyre cold#i think their sibling dynamic could be sooo fucking funny its insane#azula#azula atla#atla#avatar the last airbender#zuko#atla zuko#firelord zuko#DISCLAIMER I AM YET TO READ THE COMICS SO IDK WHAT HAPPENS TO HER IN THEM#also long overdue for a rewatch of the show its insane
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Tiresias: I see your wife........ with a ruthless man who has killed hundreds of people
Odysseus:
Odysseus:
Odysseus: *Monster starts playing* I will ensure that this man will be me
#defy fate fuck the prophecy#epic the musical#odysseus: another man??? with MY wife??? not on my watch#1k#at least i think i'm funny#5k#10k
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Can we talk about the kind of woman Applejack attracts.
#SHE JUST WANTS TO DO CHORES#pony posting#THERE ARE BEAUTIFUL WOMEN IN THE AREA#THAT DESIRE HER CARNALLY#my little pony#everyone wants Applejack is such a fun trope#mlp#applejack#rarity#autumn blaze#mlp fim#countess coloratura#rara#cherry jubilee#mlp gen 4#mlp fanart#friendship is magic#I don't even know the name of these ships dfhbdh#I will not hear arguments that Autumn blaze does not classify as a beautiful woman. she's a mythical being#tortured by thirst lol#so fucking funny.#Rara's “childhood friends that grew UP” thing is so funny.#rarijack is peak but I think its funny that theres more beautiful women into her.
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this is inexplicably my favorite tiktok ever it brings me to tears every time why did he do thatttt
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There's a lot I could say about The Subtance as an unflinching, gruesome close-up portrait of systemic misogyny, internalized sexism, self-hatred, and the brutality of fame, but more importantly, you know what I bet? I bet there is exactly one customer of The Subtance who is doing everything right. Week one, makes a living as a fitness influencer; week two, enjoys a lavish retirement funded by her other self's earnings. Week one, jogging, yoga, filming tiktoks, enjoying the vitality of youth; week two, Alaskan cruises, mahjong with the girls, enjoying unlimited free time and liberation from the crushing weight of the societal expectation to care what other people think of you. Keeps her other self on a nice air mattress with a quilt and always cooks a big recovery breakfast to be waiting for her when she switches. Walks out of that creepy alley every week whistling. Has no idea potential complications even exist. Every other user is living a psychedelic horror show of trauma, goop, and rage, and she's just at Barnes and Noble picking up the latest selection for book club. I know I'm alone in this, but I would happily watch that sequel.
#the substance#just as a nice palate cleanser#i loved all 140 batshit gory minutes of it don't get me wrong#i just think the flipside is also really funny#runs into that other old guy at the diner and is like. honey. what the fuck are you talking about. do you have someone i can call#my thoughts
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there should be a sex ed program called ‘are you fucking serious’
#I think it would be funny#you need to be fucking serious. fucking silly can#lead to unwanted consequences
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@staff if you [change] the [design] of the fucking [dashboard] i will kill you
edit. i want it on the actual post that i am not actually making a de-th threat against the staff. that's shitty. the caption quotes the fucking costco hot dog meme, which i originally said in the tags. if any staff member sees this please do Not take it personally
#dashboard#staff#tumblr update#comic#art#doodles#costco ceo about the price of a hot dog.png#i refuse to believe this is a real problem that site owners think people have#frankly i refuse to believe people had this issue with deviantart before eclipse#i am sorry you have to put about 15 minutes of effort into understanding a new website. feel better soon#my main blog doesn't have it yet but i logged into here to make this post and. i have it#this is fucking terrible. it would ahve been really really funny for april fools day but not as a permanent change#i hate it a Lot. i hate it so fucking much. oh . my god.#edit - guys i amnot actually sending de*th threats to staff it's the costco hot dog meme
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having a normal one on that error message generator tonight
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