#ftm top surgery recovery

[pickledclowns]

Alright so for pride and the sake of visibility I thought I'd share my chest. I had top surgery February 14th 2023 and my surgical recovery was finally done September(ish) 2023. A lot of stuff online has a lot of trans masculine people, or any trans person who goes through any surgery, represented with very neat very subtle top surgery scars and I wanted to share my "not ideal" results. So, how did this happen and why? My mom died of breast cancer so I wasn't able to keep any breast tissue to resulting in what is called a large crater deformity that caused my chest to be literally concave. If you have a potential risk of genetic breast cancer this will likely also be suggested to you. I promise no amount of vanity is worth breast cancer. Within the first 48 hours of my recovery I ended up having a hematoma (blood pooling under the skin) due to not being informed I had to stuff my compression vest with towels to increase compression outside of just the vest, because my chest was literally concave. Blood filled the cavity and caused pressure to build behind my skin turning a 6 week recovery into a 6 month recovery with VHS sized hole in my chest. This happened because a small square of skin had died and couldn't be saved. Ultimately one of my nipples was in that square of dead skin and had to be removed. I also have large dog tags and hormonal acne scars. All of these things are considered not ideal and unattractive.

So do I like my body? Ultimately I feel like there is so much pressure to conform to a certain aesthetic so that cis people will find us valid so that cis people could find us attractive (more like everyone has to find us attractive). That isn't even touching on being a fat trans dude. I was confined to a binder for my 8 hour work shift and I was unable to do anything else for the rest of the day so long as I wanted to pass (which i do and did at the time). Regardless of how it looks I can go wherever I want and do whatever I want without fear of injury and that is HUGE and has made a HUGE impact on my life and my ability to enjoy myself. I can't say this is the ideal form of my body but I don't think I dislike myself. My results aren't perfect but in the reality of my life I wouldn't go back and change things. I don't consider my surgery botched, I don't consider my surgeon bad she did everything she could for free post surgery to help me recover from this including giving me medical supplies for my recovery. Why share this? Can you change how you look? I haven't shared these in the past because I feel like not being the most attractive trans person, or your surgery going into places you weren't expecting gives a lot of trans people anxiety like we are giving cis people and TERFS ammunition to be cruel to us. Part of the reason I tagged my photos with my URL is because I didn't want someone to steal my photos and start larping as a detrans regret story. But I don't think my body is inherently unattractive because I had surgical complications I just think we've been conditioned to see results like mine as unattractive. You will find similar sentiments amongst any group with body differences. Regardless of all of these potential problems the lack of representation for people like me who have had surgery and you don't come out looking like a skinny/hunky cis passing dude that all the girls swoon over is evident. Other people like me exist and I need everyone cis and trans alike to acknowledge the existence of "non ideal" surgical outcomes. From my research ultimately 5-10%~ of people who undergo any surgical breast augmentation will deal with necrosis (dead skin). [1][2] Ultimately necrosis and any other type of complication is something that needs to be weighed before you have surgery. For me I couldn't enjoy my life with giant sacks of fat on my chest and I couldn't do anything outside of work. For me the surgery was worth it and I'd do it all over again even if it meant having worse aesthetic outcomes than I do now. I also maintain control over my body. Once my nerves stop freaking me out and finish regrowing I plan on getting tattoos to help enhance the way I feel about my chest. Further this isn't what I looked like in September of 2023. I've been hitting the gym to put it lightly and my chest has filled out and will continue to fill out over time. Won't get rid of my scar but I'm looking forward to sharing more photos once I get what I want from my efforts. So yeah there it all is. I didn't have to share this but I wanted to. I wanted other people to feel not as alone as I did in recovery. It was worth it and I am happy in my body. Go forth and be free. Happy pride everyone!

[kinlodok]

Ma is jön hozzám látogatni 🥺

Megyünk boltba ketten 🥺

Segít nekem hajat mosni 🥺

[boytransmission]

little pout

$app + top surgery fund + wishlist

[angelic-transsexual]

Things I learned post top surgery (peri edition) 5 days post-op

Being put to sleep and waking up wasn’t as scary I thought it was gonna be

Huge amounts of tightness and soreness in my chest area

Numb chest

Drains are annoying little bitches

T-Rex arms are real as fuck

I actually had a bit of trouble trying to pee the night I got home, it took my body a bit to get back to being able to pee normally

Neck pillows are both your friend and your enemy

Bad posture due to binder from hell

My back is sore from my bad posture and sleeping elevated

Applesauce is your best friend the first few days post-op

Liquid IV helped my sore throat from the tube they put down my throat

Car rides are a no

Help from others even if it’s just little things is a big yes

LOTS OF WATER

I got orange stained skin from something they put on my body during surgery, don’t know exactly what it is

I’m actually very slow at walking

Walking around every few hours is one of the best things you could do

You need assistance to bathe, and I couldn’t take a shower for 48 hrs after surgery

Wipes are your friend

Greasy hair is expected to

Flannels and sweatpants are the best clothing options

My hunger has been up and down, sometimes I’m super hungry and sometimes I’m barely hungry

Painkillers and Tylenol are your absolute best friend

[shrews-things]

Things about top surgery that I didn't expect (double incision)

It hurt so much less right after waking up than I thought it would, it was similar to pneumonia lung pain like kind of a burning sensation

Wasn't hard or upsetting to get used to my new look!! Also there isn't an ounce of regret in me, I thought I'd have some at least in the first few weeks

I had the posture of a shrimp for like two whole weeks from that compression garment

It itches as it heals which is fucked up bc I can't feel shit in any of it and also when I try to gently pat it to make the itch go away, I can't feel that either so it doesn't help :')

I'm like 5 weeks post-op and I still can't raise my arms above my head gdkdhskhdn

Still reaching for a bra or binder out of habit when getting dressed

It still feels like I'm somehow??? Hiding my chest???? Like when I was still just binding, I still go like "oh this is a good outfit, it hides my chest well" boy you haven't got a chest to hide

The urge to pull out the loose ends of my dissolvable stitches,,,,

[beautifulqueerexistence]

Day 1 post op (Top Surgery was yesterday) - Woke up and I could tell the nerve block in my chest is starting to wear off. Ended up opting for the stronger meds and I’m waiting for those to kick in before we change the gauze underneath. It’s not too horrible, but the pain is definitely a consistent ache in my chest and upper arms. I feel really weak and sitting up on my own is hard without a hand as leverage. I ended up falling asleep REALLY hard last night, didn’t even text my partner goodnight. I keep telling myself that this is the hardest part. The first few days are the hardest.

[nihilism-0]

The most difficult thing about mastectomy recovery for me is the significant loss of muscle mass.

I spent 2 years in the gym for this? I was really happy with my biceps, but they're gone, now I'm just a skinny guy.

It's really worth it, I just want to do some drama, I don't know when I'll be ready, but I'll start again. (I really hate exercise but I'm a perfectionist with only my own body,I have tca and dismorphia too)

[dino-boyo-agere]

I have an infection beneath my top surgery scar, a piece of stitching seems to have been eaten by the skin and is now causing infection.

I'll go to the clinic on Thursday (23.11.23) to get it removed, I'll make an update after!!

Look at this annoying little guy, causing me pain and discomfort.. How dare he be so cute & smol?!

And hat's what the area looks like:

!cw: swollen & red skin

It's hot to the touch and really tender, raising my left arm hurts and I'm really uncomfortable. :(

[asdro]

It's been six months since my top surgery!

The recovery process has definitely been easier than I thought, I'm so happy for doing this, for being able to have surgery in my hometown and for how I'm looking today.

Thanks to everyone who donated and/or shared my top surgery campaign, it was truly so helpful and I just couldn't have done it without your help.

And thanks to all the people out there trying to create a more inclusive and accesible world.

[trailmixedup]

OKAY! So!! I am one week post op from top surgery and here are the things I have learned:

• nothing prepares you for how fucking bloated you get. It is emotionally and physically devastating.

• eat protein or you’re going to start dreaming about it.

• get ready to literally not have any reading comprehension or speaking ability until you’re after the heavy pain med. and then after that as well…

• holy shit your back is gonna hurt. You can’t crack it. No twisting.

• you can’t use ice packs on your actual chest, but they’re lifesavers to sleep with- I put mine under my neck on my pillow to keep my neck from cramping.

• the pressure and tension on your chest is uncomfortable but not unbearable. Mostly it’s just annoying.

• you need pockets. Dear gods you NEED pockets.

• you do not want pants with a button. The button pants will not fit and it will make you sad. It’s just not even worth trying. Just have drawstring pants, it’s easier on the ego.

• wiping your ass is hard now. I’m sorry.

• blowing your nose hurts. Sneezing hurts. Coughing hurts. Laughing hurts. Just… avoid needing too much lung capacity all at once.

• If you have body hair prepare for your compression garments to hurt. My skin is so tender and painful all of the time. And there’s no break.

• if you keep your nipples you won’t be allowed to shower for 2 weeks. You’re going to start stinking. Have someone around you that is willing to wash your hair like how they wash babies hair. Also have rubbing alcohol so that you can neutralize your armpit stink because deodorant is off limits for your healing incisions.

• chapstick is not optional. You’re going to want it.

• same goes for a big cup with a well-sealed lid and a straw. Drink so much water.

• you’re going to feel helpless and useless. It sucks. It’s okay. Don’t push yourself.

• you’re going to want to wear pants with pockets to bed so you have somewhere to put your drains. You’ll be so tired that it doesn’t matter for the first couple days.

• you want the longest phone charger known to man. I promise. There is no such thing as too long.

• ask for the anti-nausea patch. You’re going to want it, and it lasts like 3 days. Throwing up HURTS.

• the healthier you can be before the surgery the easier your recovery is going to be. It isn’t fatphobic or stuck up or whatever else people say to lose excess weight and eat super clean before your surgery. Start moving your body every day. Start practicing going from sitting to standing and laying to standing without using your hands. Your body will reward effort to be healthy with safer surgery and easier healing.

• oh my god buy a serious laxative that you know works for you. Your body will literally forget how to shit.

• if you can, buy paper medical tape, gauze pads, and extra strength Tylenol. You will use them.

• plan to take naps. There is no weakness in a nap.

• get up and stretch your legs hourly. I promise it’s worth it. You will feel so much better.

• you’re going to want a hat or some sort of hair control.

• if the binder doesn’t fit you in the arm holes, you don’t have to let it chafe at your armpits and hurt like a mother fucker. Just cut the arm holes wider with a pair of scissors.

• have some sort of routine. You’ll fall apart otherwise.

• you’re going to be snippy and bitchy. Get ready to apologize for being an asshole. Short tempers happen, but don’t forget to say sorry.

• prepare yourself for all the random tape and other stuff to itch. You just have to grin and bear it. Things are so itchy.

That’s all I can think of right now, plus I’m sleepy. I will add to the list when I think of more ^_^

[1000-silverfish-in-a-hoodie]

Told my sister about my drains and she thought the liquid would be milk

[mother-shipper]

5 Weeks post op with Dr. Fosnot at UPenn!

[hydeingpurples]

Recovering from top surgery with Tourette's is going to be tough. My tics like to target wounds which is incredibly unfortunate.

Sitting with the constant urge to punch myself in the chest is incredibly difficult. It takes so much concentration not to do it, to redirect the tic. It's a horrible feeling. I'm so scared I'm going to damage it, pull something. I told my surgeon about my tics and she seemed confident it'd be okay so I have faith in her. Everything is glued and stitched together, and the post op binder and tight, so I doubt I'll do any damage. But it's so scary. All I can do is keep myself constantly occupied, ensure I keep my anxiety levels as low as possible, and keep pillows nearby so if I can't bare the urge anymore, at least i can hit the pillow.

[maplebean2003]

update: I've finally gotten approved for top surgery insurance wise so I was able to lower the goal amount yay!!! Now I only need help with supplies and gas as I save for a hotel!! :DD thank you everyone who have already donated and shared around this means so so much

My Amazon list if you are more comfortable is

[angelic-transsexual]

I am getting a revision surgery for top surgery.

I am not upset by this. Needing revision surgeries are not something people should be ashamed of. Sometimes things just don’t workout the way you expect them to.

Also please don’t shame people for needing revisions?? I was not “botched.” Or anything of the sort. My results simply are not what I was expecting and I feel very neutral about getting another surgery on my chest. I’ve gone through top surgery recovery once, this is not new to me.

[buttonloops]

them post-op blues kicked in