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Can't wait for people to remember he’s gonna be bald for 1/3 of the movie 💀
#ballad of songbirds and snakes#tbosas#lucy gray baird#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#thg#coriolanus snow#incorrect thg quotes#thg incorrect quotes#sejanus plinth#sejanus#tbosas movie#thg movies#thg prequel#bald headed bitch#fruit cup even
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Shoujo Stray Dogs
#this is fruits basket level shoujo romance for these 2. how is this even real#like ok now cup his face and swear your fealty to him. might as well at this point gayboy#bsd#bungou stray dogs 119#bungou stray dogs#bsd 119#bsd akutagawa#akutagawa ryuunosuke#atsushi nakajima#bsd atsushi#sskk#shin soukoku#a.txt
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Cozy (a @jttw-monkeybusiness Drabble )
So I made another one- this one was inspired by this ask (I suck at Hyperlinks I’m so sorry)
It rolled a bit in my brain and kept begging to be fleshed out, so I decided to give it life ! Enjoy!
Snow
Snow fell in white flurries, chasing away the blossoms and birds that had been sitting in the trees just moments before. The storm was in a full frenzy now, peeling petals from overeager trees who had budded too soon, and throwing the birds from the sky. The wind whipped up the cold powder to spray back in the face of the pilgrims as they continued on their journey. They had left the warm subtropical forest only hours ago, where Sophie had rolled her sleeves up to relieve some of the excess heat. Now however, she was shivering.
None of the group, save for Wukong, was truly equipped for the snow and cold. Pigsys ears were turning purple from the temperature as he tried, and failed, to hide from the worst of it behind Sandy. Sandy silently continued on, carving a path for Sophie (who trailed farther behind) to walk through. The snow was already deep, coming to her knees as they continued to follow the tiny path up the mountain. Black rock jutted upward and outward like broken teeth into the white air. Horse and Monk both were struggling ahead, Yulongs sides shivering in the wet as the snow melted on his fur. Tripitaka called Wukong over, asking him to scout ahead to look for a place they could shelter for the duration of this storm. Sophie could see there heads bent together as Master and pupil discussed. Wukong, for once, didn’t reply with a snort or a quick jab at how Trip should be lucky for him to be his disciple. Instead he had somersaulted off, gone in a flash of fur and tiger stripes, into the air.
“Would be nice if I could just somersault out of here.” Sophie muttered.
A freak blizzard had not been on the list of things Sophie was ready for. She had faced shape-changing demons, women that turned to great tigers to devour Tripitaka, mountain gods throwing stones down into their path and the like. Sophie was prepared for any person or creature - or at least- expecting it. The weather however? She was severely underprepared for. She had the travel clothes she had bought with the coin purse she’d been given. They were meant for light rain and mild heat. Not for a snowstorm. Sophies hair was getting wet and the cold was starting to chill her ears from where it melted.
“It’s so cold…” she muttered. She kept following Sandys footpath, thankful for the giant of a river demon and his slow shuffling walk. If he was walking normally he would have left her far behind in the snow.
Her foot hit a rock and slipped, sending her flailing into a rapidly growing snowbank. “F-f-f-freezing! AH!” Snow had gone down her shirt, sending a chill up her spine. Faster than a wildcat she had hopped from the bank, shaking herself.
“Hate snow hate snow hate snow—“ she chanted her mantra as she slapped off the powder, trying to prevent it from melting and wetting her clothes. Wet clothes would only spell disaster. Sophie could recall all the cold born illnesses from one special National Geographic did on Everest and the extreme exposure the hikers faced there: pneumonia, Trench foot, frostbite, hypothermia, flu, Chilblains, bronchitis —
Her foot slipped again as her mind was listing all the things that could happen. Sophie would have been in the snowbank a second time except something caught her by the midriff and hauled her up.
“Stupid women stay on your feet!” Wukong snarled in her ear, setting her down. Sophie nodded, teeth chattering and nose turning red as the cold began to chap it. “Of all the people here I thought at least you had the common sense to be aware of ice!”
From up ahead came the faint cry and heavy fall as Pigsys fell face first in the snow. Sandy had to quickly turn to hid a chuckle as the drenched demon began wilding swinging his rake around in rage.
“S-s-sorry.” She mumbled, shoving her hands beneath her armpits. “Slipped.”
“What’s wrong with your speech? You sound like a squirrel.” Wukong cocked his head, an eyebrow raised. He rolled his eyes when Sophie didn’t banter back irritated she wasn’t snapping back at him. That agitation grew when he felt something like worry begin to itch his pelt. Of the pilgrims, the two mortals were in his charge of care and were the most delicate. While Wukong could fight off monsters and Demons and wicked minded mortals he could not fight a storm. Well- he could if he really wanted to find the celestial body responsible for its creation. But that would take time- and time was not on his side on this.
Tripitaka had put on a brave face when he had asked the Monkey King to find shelter. That didn’t mean Wukong had not noticed how his Masters hands had turned red at the growing cold, how his body shivered and his nose sniffed. Wukong would have teased, poked and prodded at his master- it was his nature to rile and cause mischief. But when he had seen the half awake expression on the mortal man’s face, Wukong had bit his tongue (with great effort) and had instead nodded.
Seeing Sophie in a similar state made the itch beneath his pelt grow worse as fire ants had begun to bite his skin.
“Damn it.” He cursed beneath his breath. He snatched her arm, avoiding her hand, and started dragging her behind him. “Come on just a bit farther you softie. I found a cave up ahead where we can get out of the worst of it. You mortals are ABSOLUTELY worthless when it comes to weather —“
Sophie was only half listening to Wukongs ranting. She allowed herself to be dragged up the mountain pass, trusting the Monkey King to find a better route than her own dimming senses. The cold was like a blanket she wanted to escape out of. Or escape into? She couldn’t remember clearly. If she closed her eyes… she was so tired. The snow looked inviting, comforting. Like the best downy comforter. Like the fluffiest pillow.
Maybe I just … need to lay … down in the comfort. Just close my eyes for a few minutes.
They had been walking for hours before the storm blew in. Her feet hurt, her hands shook and it was so cold. Cold. She just wanted to sleep.
“SOPHIE LOOK AT ME!” Wukong yanked her and she was rattled enough to open her eyes wider in surprise. Sun Wukong was right in her face, leaning so close she could see every line of his facial markings in detail. His breath came from between his teeth like some dragons as he glared.
“Ye-es?!”
“Stay awake- we're almost there. If you fall asleep while I’m dragging your ass up the mountain I will bite your pretty nose clean off!” The demonic monkey spat, then, half carried, half dragged Sophie the rest of the way. Leaning against his back Sophie sighed. Through the clothing she could feel it- like desert sand warmed by the sun. Delicious heat. Sophie - who wouldn’t in normal circumstances have cuddled so close- practically melted against the warmth. What else could she do? Wukong was dragging her up the mountain- practically carrying her. She could see the bend in the mountain pass- a steep cliff where the road cut itself around and hugged the mountain as a snake would do climbing along a vine. Almost there.
“How come you get to be so warm?” She grumbled, not realizing she had said it aloud. Wukong had heard however, and his face became a storm cloud as his heart took a shuddering beat.
“Maybe grow some fur or ask for the Buddha to make you some furry creature. Bet he would too.” Wukong grumbled back.
Stupid fucking women.
They reached the curve in the mountain where Pigsy and Sandy- mostly Sandy since the pig demon kept complaining about how cold his snout was- were setting up three tents. The tents were simple, the leather treated against wet weather and solid. All pigsy had to do was drive the stakes into the stone which, it seemed, he was failing at.
“It’s so damn cold!” Pigsy snorted angrily stamping his hands together, having missed the spike for the third time. “Blasted Heaven and whoever ordered a storm now of all times! Don’t they know who’s crossing these mountains?”
“Less talking more working.” Sandy angrily chided. He had finished setting up the second tent all on his own. When Pigsy went to open his mouth to make another comment and the usually peaceful Sandy shoved him across the shallow cave to the last tent and the one closest to the entrance.
As Wukong walked past, Pigsy lifted an eyebrow at the strange sight. The Monkey King could see the pig beginning to lift a lip in a smirk only to stop when he noticed Sophie’s shivering.
“What did you do?” Those were the last words Wukong expected to come out of his fellow brothers mouth.
“WHAT DID I DO?!” He bared his teeth, fangs on display. He didn’t have time for Pigsy or for his own feelings to confuse him. He knew Sophie was practically clinging to his back like the newborn monkeys did to their mothers back on Flower Fruit Mountain. He was very aware of it. The last thing he needed was for this thick pink idiot to start shit with him.
“I DIDNT DO SHIT YOU THICK HEADED BOAR.” He spat, continuing past. “THIS IDIOT STARTED FALLING ASLEEP IN THE FUCKING STORM. NOW SHUT UP AND GET THE OTHER TENT SET UP.”
Wukong left Pigsy behind, angrily chattering to himself and feeling embarrassed all the while. He couldn’t let that thick womanizing boar know any of Wukongs feelings. If he did, the damn brute would only press his nose to it and route deeper. The sooner he got Sophie off his back the better. Even though he didn’t entirely want that.
He reached the back corner of the cave, setting Sophie down. She huffed, letting go with some reluctance to his warm back. The Monkey King knelt, leaning in. Sophie’s shivering was less. Good.
“I’ll be back- I have to make sure the pink ham doesn’t fuck up the last tent. Once I’ve tended Yulong and seen to my masters comforts I’ll be back to check on you.”
Sophie pulled her knees to her chest. She was still so cold. She wanted nothing more then to curl up and sleep- to find something warm and hold onto it. She heard Wukong from far off - but she nodded.
“S-S-sure… just gonna fall .. asleep.”
“Don’t fall asleep you idiot.” He snapped.
“Why not?” Sophie groaned. She was tired
“Remember. You are in wet clothes. Wake up just to remember - Think. Use that reading brain of yours.” He flicked her between the eyes. That woke Sophie up enough as the pain cleared her head.
“Ow, what the hell Wukong?!” Sophie felt like she had come out of a daze. Her fingers started rubbing at the pain. It wasn’t terrible but … she felt like a child be scolded. Sophie glared up into the smug monkey face.
“Awake? Good. Now fucking listen before you nod off again.” Wukong smirked just a bit. The itching beneath his fur had eased just enough upon seeing her get mad. He spoke slowly, for her sake but also to press in how much he enjoyed giving her orders- and being right about them. “Your clothes are wet. You can’t sleep in them. Change to new ones. In fact, bundle up as much as you can. I’ll be back to check on you.”
Wukong stood up, then turned back around to flick her on the forehead again.
“Ow! I’m up, I'm up!” Sophie rubbed at the space between her brows.
“Did you hear what I said?”
“Yes yes …” she uncurled herself and stood as well, looking down at the Monkey King. “Get out of wet clothes and get new ones. Bundle up. That really hurt you know.”
“If you are still in wet fucking clothes, I’ll do a lot worse then just smack you between the eyes.” And then he was away, already cussing Pigsy out who had, somehow, managed to rip the tent.
It was a only about twenty minutes later but Sophie had managed not to fall asleep. She had gotten into the tent and had peeled the worst of the wet clothes off. Her poor shoes were the worst for wear- the socks and the soles were soaked. She would have to wear her spare shoes tomorrow and let these ones dry. Sophie had set the wet clothes to the farthest side of the tent. She was now dressed in a pair of gray sweats, a long sleeve and her hoodie of bright orange with clementines decorating the front. She felt much warmer and absolutely exhausted. Her fingers were red where the cold had gotten them, her lips felt chapped from the dry air, and her body just kept shivering.
Sophie had retreated almost completely into the hoodie- only her face was viewable.
The tent flap lifted and Wukong stepped in, a bowl of some sort of wild berries and cold rice in one hand. He took one look at her huddled there on her sleeping mat and snorted.
“You look like some orange orangutan.”
“Hahah very funny. See how you like the cold when you don’t have fur.” She shot back. Wukong offered the bowl to her and she took it, digging into it with gusto.
“How’s Trip?” She asked between bites.
“Alive.” Wukong leaned back, putting his arms beneath his head as he stared up at the tent ceiling. “You two would have frozen if not for me- you were both starting to look pinker than yangmei fruit.”
“Thank you.” Sophie said.
“Mm? What are you thankful for ?”
Oh he was gonna ask her for all of it then? Sophie looked at him. Wukong had propped himself up enough to stare at her, waiting.
“Thank you for the food.” She lifted the now empty bowl- she had been famished - to him. “Thank you for finding a spot to rest. And … thanks for dragging me out of the snow.”
“You almost died I hope you know that.” He smirked, laying back down, eyes closing. She followed suit, too tired to sit up anymore or even bicker back with him.
“Yeah I did …” Sophie yawned. Usually she wouldn’t admit so readily to Wukong just how certain situations had made her dependent upon him. He was always, in some way or other, saving the lot of them. When Tripitaka was snatched up by some Goblins belonging to some chieftain of a nearby mountain, when Pigsy had boasted that they didn’t need Wukong and then (almost immediately) failed to find food when Wukong was sent away. He had stopped the dragon horse from foundering and taken to the care of his hooves and coat many a time. The Monkey King had seen to restoring the missing supplies from Sophie pack when a group of mischievous raccoon spirits had taken it. Wukong had even replaced Sandy’s teakettle when it was smashed in battle (Sophie was pretty sure he had stolen it).
He may act aloof and pompous but deep down, this big old brute cared for them. Even Pigsy.
Sophie felt her eyes grow heavy as Wukong kept talking about how she had stumbled in the snow like some “dumb struck fawn” until he came to help her.
As she relaxed to the sound of his voice rumbling on and on, it almost felt … cozy. Yes Wukong may like to slide the occasional wriggly salamander into her water skin, he may thumb through her things like they were his, he may call her idiot, stupid women, and softie. But. There was no real malice behind his actions.
He was also kind of … warm. She scooted closer, half listening to the Monkey ramble on about the idiocy of mortals and the greatness of beings such as him. He was rambling on about his natural prowess over mortals and how he had mastered the arts of immortality and Tripitaka couldn’t even master warding off a cold. Sophie fell asleep before he could get to the part about her looking like a slack jawed idiot in the snow.
Wukong was only a quarter way through his regaling of the story of how he had saved everyone this day when he felt hands wrap around his chest.
His heart nearly flew into his throat as he stopped dead in his speech. His mouth was open, voice cut off halfway through his speech. Sophie curled into his side, face buried in the crook of his neck and so close to his ear he could feel her breathing against its shell.
Electricity shot threw him, fur standing on end as if he had been in a thunderstorm.
He was suddenly very aware of many things. Of Sophie’s hands that had escaped that ridiculous orange sweatshirt and were now burrowed into his fur. One arm was across his chest. The second one was now, somehow beneath his head and tugging on his shoulder. Sophie’s face rested on his arm and in the curve of his neck, her face rubbing back and forth like a cat. As if … she was enjoying the feel of it.
Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
Sophie moved just a bit, mumbling in his ear and Wukong felt his tail lash like it had just been bit. She didn’t say anything coherent but — the proximity alone—
Fucking Hell and all its Judges.
Sophie was … cuddling him.
She was practically twined around him.
And she smelled fantastic. Her scent always changed- sometimes it held a hint of lemons and the sweetness of grass, other times it floated like rain clouds and smelled of stones. But all of it together had a larger perfume beneath it. It was just her. Yes there were moments when her scent changed just enough that he felt like he was adding new spices onto his favorite dish. The essence of it, however, was just Sophie.
And now that cloud was all around him, filling his nose.
He looked at her, turning his head just a fraction to see.
Big mistake.
She was asleep, passed out completely. She looked so … fragile asleep. The dark circles beneath her eyes spoke of how she hadn’t been sleeping well. Her nose was stupidly pink like a Red Pika in her pale face. The cold must have chapped it. His eyes darted to her lips …
Mistake number two.
Wukong looked away, feeling his face flame. Fuck. Shit. He was stuck in a predicament now. He hadn’t meant to chat away about himself for so long that Sophie would fall asleep. Wukong was at war with himself. On one hand, he needed to get out of here. To leave before Pigsy and the others found out- before Sophie found out.
He couldn’t let anyone be that close to him- couldn’t let anyone be as close as Sophie was right now. It was a liability to his pride, to his reputation—
To his heart. Because if she rejected him it would ruin the friendship they had. And the feeling he had building in his chest- he would crush it in his fist before he let it jeopardize that peace between them.
I have to leave —
Wukong tried to move-
Only to feel Sophie’s fingers tug in his fur and her sleepy voice grumble “m’no don’t go.”
Jade Emperor flay me and boil me alive again.
In all the hundreds of years of living, Wukong had only felt trapped like this but once before. The first time he had lost his wager to the Buddha, having been unable to somersault out of his hand. The second time? He was trapped because he allowed it. He was trapped in a way no one in Heaven could have predicted- or had thought to do. Wukong had been placed in vats to be boiled, had wormed and tricked his way out of every trap and net that had attempted to keep his mischief managed. It had taken Buddha and his wager to finally end Wukongs terrorization of Heaven.
Wukong couldn’t move now. He was tethered here by frail fingers and the steady beat of a mortal's heart.
He could hear her heartbeat, feel it against his side. It was steady, soft. Like the steady roar of Water-Curtain Cave. Like the wind through the trees of the orchards on his mountain.
She was mortal. One day that steady beat would stop as all mortal hearts did.
That set his tail to lashing just a bit.
Hasn't she been afraid of dying? Of growing old? He remembered hearing a conversation late at night- when Tripataka and Sophie had those rare mortal conversations where he was explicitly not allowed to sit in on. He hadn’t known why it was such a secret conversation. So of course, since it wasn’t an order, Wukong had pulled a hair from his tail and made a doppel and floated somewhere nearby but out of sight to eavesdrop. The Monk and Reader had been chatting about death, about Sophie’s future.
Well her fears were unfounded. Doesn’t she know I would take care of her? Sophie shifted a bit closer as a gust of wind slipped beneath the tent flat he had left unsecured. Damn it all. Wukong carefully, o so carefully, shifted himself. He slid his body so he was now lying on his side, setting Sophie’s head beneath his chin. It was all the invitation Sophie needed to cuddle closer and escape from the wind.
“You stupid women.” He angrily whispered into her hair. He wouldn’t let her die. He would just fix that. He would fix a lot of her problems. She just had to tell him. He was Sun Wukong, Great Sage Equal to Heaven. He knew of a hundred different ways to achieve immortality. He could fix them all. Like her problem right now of being cold.
He was too tense to relax fully- too aware- but he grew just a fraction larger. His size now dwarfed Sophie’s a good bit and gave her a bit more to tangle into. And she did. Sophie curled her knees up, shivering slowing. Wukong waited. Watching. When finally the shivering had ceased he allowed just a fraction of tension to slide off of him. This stupid softie is gonna make me soft. The thought didn’t bother him as much as it would have months ago.
Maybe he wouldn’t get much sleep tonight but…
He could make her life Hell in the morning. It was something that she owed him on. His face was screwed furiously into a scowl because all he wanted to do was enjoy this moment but if he did- if he really truly did- he didn’t know if he would be able to stop.
She was most assuredly going to be bombarded tomorrow with the most annoying and snappish teasing and toying a King of Monkeys and tricks could give.
Sophie woke with a start as something cold and wet slapped her in the face. She panicked as any person would.
“GaH! DEMON!” She cried, grabbing at her face and throwing it aside. It was a wet rag.
“Relax.” Wukongs voice laughed at her. “Unless cloth can become possessed and has gained a hunger for red nosed mortal flesh, you're fine.”
He was at the tent flap, grinning ear to ear in a grin that promised problems. Really so early in the morning and he already wants to play games ?
“You could have woken me up in a number of other ways- why did you pick that?” Sophie rubbed at her face, feeling … huh. She didn’t feel as sore as she usually felt. When Sophie woke up there was almost a constant crick of pain in her neck from whatever odd angle she had slept in on the ground.
Maybe I had been so tired my body just finally didn’t care.
He shrugged. “You stink. Next place we stop at you better demand a bath of some sort or other.”
“Thanks….” She grumbled, letting the sarcasm drip off her words. She took the cloth up, rubbing the sleep out of her face and the worst of the dirt off her face and arms. She would kill for a warm bath, one that would wake up her bones and chase the last of the cold from her body. Once clean, she checked her wet clothes, bundling them away in a separate part of her pack to avoid them dampening the rest of her stuff. Then she stepped out of the tent, smelling the fire and the promise of breakfast being made.
Only for her feet to slip right from beneath her as a monkey foot stuck out and caught her ankle.
“WUKONG!”
He laughed, face full of malicious mischief as Sophie gathered herself up to chase after the errant Monkey. To do what, she didn’t know. He was a mystical demonic creature born of stone and she just a mortal women. As the morning light cut into the cave and Tripitaka had to order his disciple to calm down after he once again tripped her and she almost went sprawling into rocks, the pilgrims ate breakfast. They broke down their tents. And they were once again on the road.
None were the wiser of Wukongs happier mood. He hid it beneath a storm of frowns and a game of teasing torture as he became partically insufferable to Sophie. The threat of the hoop tightening spell was the only true damper to his mood when Tripataka heard Sophie scream as snow was dropped down the back of her shirt.
As the sun rose higher and the word was cast in a frosty flash of refracted gold, Wukong made a decision. He would solve Sophie problem of growing old. It was easy. And if Buddha couldn’t send her back…
Well she was a great sport for pestering and heckling. The least he could do as a benevolent King is give the poor women a roof over her head.
Maybe a few dresses down the line...
Girls liked dresses right?
“Hey Reader!” He called.
“What?”
“Dresses or suits ? What did you wear in that fake time long after this one ? Or whatever fake dimension you fell out of. What did you prefer ?”
And thus began the long hour debate that somehow pulled every one of them: Pigsy, Sandy and Tripitaka, into what was a heated discussion on the best attire for the best occasions.
#hcwrites#writing stuff#I DID ANOTHER ONE#thank you little anon for mentioning a cold snuggle scenario#I love when there’s cuddles even if one party doesn’t know or remember and the other is both ecstatic and pissed the fuck off about it#I Hope i wrote them well#the formatting took me longer then I thought#for jttw monkeybuisness#Sophie#Sophie and Wukong#sun wukong x reader#jttw sun wukong#jttw reader#jttw fanfic#I gave Sophie an orange hoodie because she already has a ‘magical’ peach kawaii cup.#make all her things fruit related#just writing the scene where Wukong walks back into the tent and has to pause because Sophie had turned into an orange made me laugh#I Hope i got your boy down Kiri!#thank you again for letting me write for you#this was a welcome break from my 30 page spree#I listened to two songs - the first part was#with Tourner Dans Le Vide#the second part where they are in the tent was with Of Monsters and Men ‘Love’#it helps to have a song hook you into writing because then you can follow the feeling of it and stay focused#I mean- songs are like a tempo to keep pace with.#sun wukong#jttw au#I did look up all the snow born illnesses to be a bit accurate.#also that falling asleep bit in the snow ? yeah that almost happened to me as a kid. it only took ten minutes - be wary of snow and cold#hcfanfics
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okay small starter call to get back in the swing here. capping at 5
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hold on im still too mad at this one fucking guest to take a nap i need to be a hater for a minute
#so when i say hell on earth kinda day i mean HELL ON EARTH kinda day#we had a large bus travel group from slovakia and then some other guests and it was almost a hundred people for breakfast#the bus group all came at the same time they descended onto the buffet like fucking seagulls i swearrrrr#and i divided tasks like i had two helpers with me in the kitchen so one guys job was just to gather dirty dishes + washing + taking clean#ones back out#and the other guy running around the buffet checking whats needed + restockjng the cold food + telling me all the hot stuff that needs#refilling. so i was in the kitchen making all the hot foods on constant rotation + chopping fruits and making smoothies and shit#and like we managed. WE MANAGED. the buffet was never even half empty at any point like yes there was always something that was empty but#dude who cares if the vanilla yoghurt is empty for 5 mins just pick something else.#and everyone was happy with their breakfast and really nice when asking if we have more of this and that etc and then there was one lady#this ONE FUCKINGGGG lady i swear i almost threw hands#she was complaining about everythinggggggggggg#about there not being any more fried eggs (already in the pan. done in 2 mins. but when helper nr2 told her that she said well why did we#run put in the first place) about the bread station being full of crumbs like girl its BREAD. my giy was running up and down the buffet#wiping it off and cleaning as fast as he could but if you allow people to cut their own bread there will be fucking crumbs. the fuck.#then she also didnt like how the butter looked bc OBV people kept using the butter and no matter how many times you go in and make it look#neat again as soon as the next person takes some it will not look picture perfect anymore#like while i was running back and forth restocking stuff with my arms full she TOOK MY ARM and pointed at things and was like#'this looks shit' so does your fucking face but you dont see me getting physical about it#and then when i came out with a big tray of fresh glasses and cups she pointed to where someone had spilled some water at the dispenser and#went 'there is water on the buffet' (far away from any food + literally its just water) and i said 'yes i know' and she goes 'well it doesnt#look very appealing. this is the worst buffet ive ever seen' and i go 'well surely you have seen how busy we are' and she FUCKING GOES#'i dont care. i paid money for this.' and i go 'well that makes two of us for not caring. we'll get to it when we have the time.' and she#said something else idk what bc i was finished with my task and had SHIT TO DO BC PPL WERE STILL EATING#so i just turned and ran back to the kitchen to keep working#actually i got back to the kitchen and said to guy nr1 'i need to go punch something' and then went out the back and started kicking the#shit out of a pile of paper boxes and THEN i continued working#and then she started TAKING PICTURES of everything she didnt like of the buffet like full offense i hope she gets hit by a bus#like with some people you can just tell they never worked a day in the service industry and no matter what you do theyll keep complaining#anyways :) tag limit. apparently. so its nap time now. honk shoo snork mimimi and so forth <3
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home from work
#if I speak…#one of the girls walked out yesterday#the best worker we have is on the verge of blowing up on this bitch’s leaders bc since he can do everything quick and efficiently already#they’re putting 3 to 4 ppl’s workloads on him to see how far they can extend his worth and then they’re over his shoulder the whole time#micromanaging him so today he almost lost it and was literally walking around mumbling about his disrespectful they all are (facts)#and how if they don’t think he’s doing it right then they can do it and I know for a fact one of the ladies heard him#bc he wasn’t even trying to hide it at this point and like this dude is cool he has a lot of patience and helps out any way he can#so if HE’S on the brink of snapping then the rest of us don’t stand a chance LMFAO#anyways today was a fucking mess those leaders know nothing about our store yet so they have us making less than what we need until we need#it so we get behind constantly and they made prep a disaster bc again they think they can just prep a bunch of stuff in the morning#and it’ll last the whole day and yes that works in theory but the reality of the situation is every day is different and today#we sold double what we did yesterday so they had to move me to prep to fix their mistakes bc we were running out of stuff 4 hours in lmfao#and I’m the only one left who knows how to do everything on prep bc the other girls had never done it before#we’re supposed to prep 20 mac n cheese trays in the morning for the whole day#we open lunch at 10:30 tell me why I go into the cooler at 12 put more in the oven and there’s only 5 left#it’s been less than 2 HOURS and you’re already running out of macs which means those idiots prepped barely anything just to try and save mo#*money to cut down waste but that gag if you’re losing money bc now you’re short on everything and customers are leaving bc they’re having#to wait a long time for their food#and macs take 40 minutes to cool LMFAO#I get over there they’re out of parfaits they’re out of fruit cups they’re out of kale salads the front is coming in and having to take#stuff as I make it bc they keep getting orders and it’s all just a fucking mess#I have to make a custom wrap and what happens?? those morons didn’t pull the flatbreads out of the freezer like they’re supposed to every#night so now we have no flatbread and I had to run back there and put them in the warming drawer to defrost and we lost an order bc I had#nothing to make the wraps with <3#I go back there to get more cold chicken SPOILER ALERT they didn’t have anyone make any this morning so now there’s no chicken for the wrap#and salad and it has to be grilled and then chilled for 2 FUCKING HOURS before it can be used#they’re a fucking disaster like 😭#was the store perfect before?? ofc not but it ran quickly and efficiently as it should and now it’s literally just a mess#this bitch hasn’t even owned it for a full week yet and has already fucked it all up#womp womp!!!!!!
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ten was so right when he said he hates pears. they’re the worst fruit. it’s like someone took a perfectly good, juicy fruit, dropped it in sand, and didn’t bother brushing any off. but. they’re just. LIKE THAT
#doctor who#tenth doctor#I hate pears#this post was brought on by accidentally eating a pear in my fruit cup and having to chew that fucking sand#WHAT EVEN IS IT#WHY ARE THEY GRAINY#MelloMoans
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i did make a bake potatoe :D
#mrowr.txt#ask to tag#i also cleaned up in the kitchen bc the dishes in the sink smelled RANCID#even tho i literally only cooked like.. late tuesday night smh#running the dishwasher now tho!! it shall all be clean#i had my bake potato and a fruit cup w jelly and a hot pocket
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feeling so defeated when it comes to food right now which sucks bc like. i have had huge successes with food! ive been trying new foods that i really really thought were not possible for me to even try but i still feel so frustrated bc my daily foods still have not changed much and i still have so much anxiety and lack of knowledge and aaaa. i wanna be able to go to a restaurant and have a single meal that i dont have to change everything to make myself comfortable with i wanna be able to try the foods my friends make without having to anticipate if its a safe thing to try or not i wanna be able to talk about food and know what people are talking about and what certain food flavors mean and i am simply so tired.
#arfid sucks. arfid sucks so much i am soooooo so tired of it#like. ive had successes. i have a really really truly so good support system w my friends#i drink orange juice now which is exciting? considering fruits and veggies is an area i dont often get much of?#but still most of my meals are combinations of the same things and im so tired#AND I CANT AFFORD TO SEE MY DIETICIAN RN#bc shes out of network and even w the sliding scale i have a balance i cant pay rn and my brain feels bad about that#and it sucks. and i am so tired and food costs.#anyway im currently stuck rn bc i cant figure out what im gonna do for lunch#bc i forgot to buy mac n cheeese cups#so ive had cafeteria pizza instead#which may have made pizza. not a safe food anymore!!! bc the idea of eating it again is unbearable!!!#and. im just#feeling so very defeated
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Got mango #2. Spun the wheel of mango opening methods people gave me and landed on the 'cut in half and use a cup to skin it'.
It went well at first (I now know the seed is huge and plate shaped which helped) before I hit a snag. 😂
#had even less success with the other half#next time i will try the avocado cut inside the skin in cubes method#i was delighted by the cup method working until that chunk of skin just went#'FUCK YOU I STAY WITH THE FRUIT'#tried to pull it back out and keep cupping but it just fell apart
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my parents house genuinely just makes me so sad
#and frustrates the crap out of me lol#my mom hates throwing away paper towels so if they’re ‘lightly used’ she just#leaves them crumpled on every surface for ‘later use’#every single empty container is kept even though they’re never used and there’s no room for them#the cups haven’t been replaced since at least 2016 cause I was here the last time they were#they’re all scuzzy and sticky like plastic is when it’s been washed too much#rotting fruits and veggies litter the counters#honestly I wish I could get them to decluttering but both my parents have that deep-seated Great Depression#leftover guilt about throwing anything away or not keeping anything#even if you don’t need it even if you don’t want it even if it would better suit someone else#even if it’s taking up all this room and you never actually use it for whatever you’re ‘saving it for’#mom fussed about clothes and shoes and books#but the siblings bedrooms are both clean and organized#and the rest of the house is a wreck#they need to take a stand on papers and garbage and unnecessary items#but they won’t and so the cycle will repeat#in a lot of ways my mom has gotten better but it still just makes me sad that they’re both this old and still can’t keep house#without it being agony for both or either of them#because dad remembers everything he’s ever owned and constantly demands them when he hasn’t known where they were since 1996#and blames everyone else for not being able to find His Thing#and how we /always/ take his stuff and he spent his whole life providing for us worthless people and we pay him back#by taking all his shit i guess#just cause we all love getting yelled at.#sigh.
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i believe that every species of insect and arachnid is an important part of the ecosystem, and the erasure of any species, no matter how small, could have disastrous consequences for the environment
that being said, if these fruit flies don’t get the FUCK out of my house i will send them all to superhell my damn self
#LIKE BRO IM LOSING MY FUCKING MIND#I POURED A CUP OF V8 THE OTHER DAY AND IN TWO MINUTES THERE WERE LIKE THREE FRUIT FLIES JUST FLOATING IN THERE#I ENDED UP LEAVING IT AS BAIT SO IT WOULD KILL MORE OF THEM AND I ENDED UP WITH *TEN*#BRO. GO FUCK YOURSELF#i dont even know how they got here#we never have fruit#well. i guess i live here. but i didnt think that counted
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me: hah. 6%??? this wine is Nothing
anyways turns out even if its nothing you shouldnt drink like half the bottle
#IM SO SLEEPY LMAO I MADE A HUGE FUCKING MISTAKE!#alcohol tw#it tasted like fruit juice thats how it GETS YOU#<- only drinks like. mead or rum+coke otherwise so like. cmon#oh my god i think im just weak thats like. 2 standard drinks barely#probably. idk i wasnt counting i was drinking out of my regular cup LOL#im fine i wouldnt even say tipsy i would just really like to sleep. orz#oh god. oops. ok so basically we had a bottle of moscato in the fridge from new years and my family was like hm. we should get rid of this#cos ur only supposed to leave it in the fridge for like. a week at most. im like surely thats not right#they were right. i think i was thinking of unopened bottles#oh god the mead. ok just checked it should b good <3 shuld still not leave it in there a lot longer tho probably.
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they should invent a sunday meme that's just like erotic without veering into blatant smut territory
#the THING abt smut memes is like. i just personally don't care for them. they're too on the nose#where's the EROTICISM. the PASSION#the TENDER EXPLORATION OF BODIES#well whatever. just know my doors are always open to such even if we don't have an established ship or anything and u just wanna like#get smth kinda gay#ooc ╱ fruit cup (complimentary).
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just ate the sweetest strawberries ever omg
#i had some leftover fruit tht i didnt eat yesterday#so i took some yogurt put in a cup with 9 blueberries and 2 strawberries and BOTH strawberries were so sweet omg#even tho strawberry is one of my favorite fruits with sweetness its a hit or miss but both were.... hits!#so yummy#🧁.txt
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In hindsight he might have been trying to watch me fail miserably at sm64 sorry little dude but why were you in my bed also you don't wanna watch this it's painful
#like i was 3 storeys high how did he get in?????#he hasn't even got wings#anyway i put him in a cup and walked all the way downstairs to put him outside#i brushed my teeth on my way back to my room so it was a fruitful venture
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