#friends dont lie stranger things ass

[jrueships]

THATS NOT NOICE >:[ 👨🏽‍🎨 🇫🇷🥖*SMACKS*

[sinclairstarz]

my S5 predictions!!!! ☆

source: divine intuition <3

steve discovers gay sex

robin ends up having to resort to eating human flesh at some point

dustin befriends all the democritters and in the big final scene vecna tries to use the animals to attack but then hes like “what?! why isnt it working?!?” and then it pans to dustin and he does a devilish little smile and all the demodogs turn to vecna and growl and vecnas like “n-nice.. doggy….”

nancy discovers gay sex

a whole episode dedicated to the party’s collective acid trip

will eats human flesh for some reason

ted wheeler and will team up and this is somehow a breaking bad homage/reference

lucas wears a lesbian t shirt for the whole season and its never mentioned (whatever a lesbian tshirt may mean)

mike calls will hot nonchalantly + max attempted before

karen wheeler discovers gay sex

holly is important

cannibalism

robin was secretly one of the lab kids

nancy goes bald

vampire eddie but he wears a cape and cant go in the sunlight and has a transylvanian accent and keeps trying to suck everyones blood and its a major obstacle

eleven sees mikes haircut and realizes shes a lesbian

something happens in texas

will dies and is reincarnated as mike and elevens baby

three waterfalls

max is fine and good but she comes out of her coma and talks like batman now

chris pratt voices a demodog

mike gets his ass WHOOPED 😂😂😂

usage of the word “twink”

mike doesnt NOT discover gay sex

hopper is cannibalized

maybe the stranger things were the friends dont lie we made along the way

[pissheadramblings]

and if it wasnt some selfish ass bullshit, id say:

“i do miss you. i didnt for a long time. lately ive been just trying not to. but theres something about going from strangers to lovers to strangers again that really gets to me. i really hate cutting ties with people, thats why ive never done it. i just have this thing where i like communication lines to stay open forever. idk. i dont like letting go of people i guess,

anyway. i do miss you. and its not your fault its probably mine and its not my fault its probably yours. i love you, i will always love you. that was never a lie. and i wish we could have been a better couple. i wish we didnt bring out each others extremes— even if the extremely goods were incredible.

you and i had known eachother more than i have with anyone else in this lifetime. its strange to just not speak. its strange to wonder how you’re doing (and sometimes from this hellsite find out) and not ask about it. its a weird feelinh not knowing you these days. or you not knowing me.

i wish we could talk and be good friends at the minimum but we’ve never been too good at that, huh?

i hope you get well.”

[erigold13261]

hiiiii eri!! ✌️ hope youre having a good day/night with your pals and also sorry you gotta deal with weird ass anons, but dont let em get to you when youre just minding your business!

(also also no pressure to reply to this, just wanted to drop by! youre also pretty cool in my book and all the nice tags you leave in all the stuff you reblog are super lovely!!)

Omg, I saw the little T with a ? in my notification (meaning I got an ask) and thought it was either the hater anon or the persona wanting my Failed Revolution to be worse than it is, so seeing it was you was so nice.

And even more nice was what you said. Like, I live by the motto of spreading kindness, which is why I respect people with different headcanons or ideas from me. And also why I always try to say something nice in the tags of stuff I reblog (I should get into the habit of commenting too honestly lol).

Anyway, don't worry about that anon. One of these days I will screenshot and post all that they have said (with some funny commentary or analysis lol) but for now, them sending me hate actually fuels me lol.

The fact I am getting hate, at least to me, means that I made it as an artists. I am in someone else's mind and bothering them with just existing, which is so funny and nice to me lol. So they can keep trying to give me "advice" or whatever they see their asks as, but I will just see it as a win in my book (and a way to make my irl friend happy as they love making fun of people like that lol).

But you are right I shouldn't let this get to me. I do my best to be respectful. Even with asks I don't personally agree with, I try my best to validate that headcanon as best as possible. So like, that anon has some things to learn about respect or learning how to curate their own online experience.

Anyway, I am doing actually really good right now. I hope you are too! Thank you so much for your response! I won't lie, I was hoping for a little bit of validation with my posts before, but wasn't actually expecting any. Thank you again, you took time out of your day to send me a nice message and it makes the world for me. Even if that anon is being rude and disrespectful (even if they don't see it as such) they took time to keep me in their mind which makes me happy.

So you and that anon mean the world to me (you more because you are nice lol). So thanks. I do my best to make a welcoming environment. I know some people will see that as "woke" or stupid or whatever, but that just means it's not for them and they should look for their own space.

Anyway, I am tipsy/drunk and just want to say I appreciate anyone who sent in a nice comment or ask. Or had liked my stuff. Any interaction is a positive in my book honestly, as that means I meant something in someone's life (whether good or bad lol).

So yeah, I am doing good and hope you are too. This is way too rambly for such a small ask, but honestly I wanted to get this out. Thank you to you, and anyone really, who even just liked my stuff (reblogging, or reblogging with tags is also a love from me). It truly means a lot for people to take time out of their day for me, a stranger on the internet. Thank you so much!

[kamikazeonwings]

TELL ME MORE ABT COWBOY ENIGMAA I LOVE HIS ASS

this is under a read-more because it got fucking LONG. you signed up for my rambly tangents though

okay so in those mysterious 5 years cowboy enigma (which we'll shorten to EC bc im not writing cowboy enigma this entire time sorry folks) traveled to this like small town and it was like. 2010 i think? anyway EC was strolling about in his cowboy getup and there was this small, like 13 year old girl crying so he goes over and introduces himself and comforts her. this 13 yrold girl was called herself "arsenic" bc she was on a huge toxin/poison kick. arsenic had no good father figure so as soon as EC showed up she was like "DAD? IS THAT YOU?" and he had to be like "youve known me for five minutes. PLEASE tell me somebody taught you stranger danger. it doesnt even have to be true just please tell me somebody- no, no, actually, i have to be a good example, dont i? you should, uh, tell the truth and not lie. ever. i mean unless ur in danger, i guess like thats a pretty good reason. but not other reasons. or. well. i mean. maybe other reasons. well. hm. well."

anyway they bonded and he became her begrudging father figure and she was fiercely protective of him bc he was kinda pathetic and funny. he then away for a few months bc he was traveling and never came back which seriously fucked with her bc like, did he just leave and decide to never come back without even letting her KNOW? a few years later she was telling her friends about him and one of them suggested that he was a time traveler and that he had come from the year 3077 to warn the present of impending danger but the evil shadow corporation killed him before he could get the word out. they all laughed. later on she was like "fuck. maybe he WAS a time traveler. god and that wouldn't even be the weirdest thing about him"

(in reality he was framed for murder in a different country. i mean, he did commit murders, but not those ones. then life was too messy to even consider contacting her, and like, i think he underestimated how much she cared about him and how much she needed him. self worth issues AYYYYY. he didnt want to put her in any more danger then he already did just by being there)

later on when shes an adult she finds woe.begone and uh. Well. you can probably guess what happens next. thinking of making her codename thing V0LUNTEER. she feels SO vindicated when time travel is proven to be real, like punching the air "I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!!!!!!!!!" not happy she had to cut her own left arm off at the shoulder though. the phantom pain was interesting to experience tho. when she got to the second part of the third challenge she laughed hysterically and started crying, for many reasons but none that she could name

[chronically-a-menace]

i haven't seen it lately but i know a while back there was this hugeeee trend of people saying they were born into the wrong generation and how they belonged into the 80's or 90's or whatever... but im gonna be really honestly i dont think we appreciate our generation enough,i LOVE being a girl in '23. i love talking the most unhinged stuff out loud with other girls during math class at 7 am. I love the little rush to open letterboxd whenever leaving the theater, i love twerking to songs none of us know the name to and lie for fun to strangers at parties. I love editing culture where a 30 second edit make me watch 8 season of a show simply because 2 characters MIGHT be gay (they never are). I love famous people drama,i love reality shows were i spent my day drown into petty fights that everyone is aware that are scripted but still opening twitter to talk about it,i love when its halloween season and teenagers dress as characters that represent them and at the same time i also love seeing girls get so confident in their costumes that means nothing else then looking hot. i love getting ready together when everything is so chaotic and "WHERES MY MASCARA" "CAN SOMEONE DO EYELINER FOR ME" "CAN YOU ZIP MY DRESS" and suddenly everyones ready and you can hear 8 different speed up songs blasting through phones because theres girls in every corner of the room making thirst traps,i love tumblr and being able to make those huge ass paragraphs about things that i want to talk about and theres no one to hear,knowing someone here probably will :) and if we wanna get poetic i love how open i can be about who i am and who i love to people my age,i love how much more accepting we are then older generations,i love seeing how my friends switched into trynna make me go out guys to giving me thumbs up and the biggest smile whenever i talk to a girl they think i could actually love,i love turning up tv to watch silly little shows about girls liking girls,i love the owls house and shera and how no one in the amphibia fandom would ever dissagree that all of those bitches are gay. i think we as a society should start appreciating all the work we did to undo everything wrong that was taught to us,and yes we obviously have flaws but we also made so much progress comparing to our grandparents and sometimes even parents

[squibbles-gubwee]

Even if you're an innocent bystander you're more fucked in ppg world. Gotham has villains??? Yeah okay that Sucks. But you know what else they have? Slight amounts of realism going on. 9/10 It a A VILLAIN that is fuckin up the town and you know thats bad but also like. Damn maybe you can get lucky and not get involved.

Townsville has villains AND MONSTERS. the amount of kaijuu that have fucked that place up is TOO many. The number of citywide "if we dont stop this EVERYONE dies" type shit is HUGE. And their fights are AS DAMAGING if not MORE DESTRUCTIVE as the villains' original plans. The place just gets fucked up on the REGULAR.

But now, lets talk more about the actual topic. Getting your ass beat.

Batman. Once a year. Batman KNOWS restraint, is the thing. He is a HUMAN man. A human man with some tech, but a human man. He kicks your ass, he probably wont even go all out bc his thing is "stop the threat, put away the villain" like if he fucking wanted he could kill all these people but he gives them a chance to like, redeem themself. He's also quite compassionate so, yknow. He maybe just beat you into next week, but Bruce Wayne probably covers your medical costs. "Sorry its gotta be this way dude. Least i can do is cover the cost."

The Powerpuff Girls are superpowered 6 year olds with six year old thoughts, feelings, and emotional understanding. They are six year olds with sonic screams, ice breath, laser vision and THEIR idea of what is right. Their OG name was The Woopass Girls. And they will WOOP. YOUR. ASS.

sure!! Theres episodes where the plot is solved peacefully!! Music, singing, whatever. That DOESNT CHANGE THE FACT THAT THEY MOSTLY BEAT THEIR VILLAINS NEARLY TO DEATH. Fuck man, I remember an episode where they just. BEAT the baddies and they werent even DOING anything. They just ASSUMED. and it was a PROBLEM. THEY fucked up. THEY HAVE PEACEFULLY RESOLVED THINGS, HAD THE VILLAIN STEP DOWN, SAID "well. now what." and then BEAT THE BAD GUY'S ASS ANYWAY!!!!

Let me also bring to attention another part of this i dont feel like people are thinking of: Time Of Day, and Social Standing.

Batman? most likely beating your ass in an alley at night. Lbr, thats his normal thing. He sometimes is out and about in the day, yeah, but usually? Night time. Its dark. Secluded. A grown man is kicking your ass at night and you can honestly probably just LIE and say "i dont know who that was i think i just got mugged" when you finally crawl out of there with your broken legs and ribs. You only gotta do it once a year.

THREE 6 YEAR OLDS ARE BEATING YOUR ASS IN BROAD DAYLIGHT, EVERY DAY, IN FRONT OF EVERYONE. THE WHOLE TOWN CHEERS THEM ON. YOUR SOCIAL STANDING IS FUCKED. Your friends? Your family? Strangers??theyre all gonna be asking questions. Why the hell are a group of kindergartener beefing with you EVERY DAY. Why are you getting absolutely dunked on by a couple of super powered ankle biters. No one wants to be around that both bc thats fucking WEIRD but also they dont wanna get caught in the crossfire of YOUR DAILY. ASSWHOOPING.

And what is the question? Would you rather FIGHT. Not talk it out, not solve with the power of friendship, F I G H T.

you getting your ass beat. One just is once a year, the other is EVERY. DAY.

10 vs 365. Come on now.

[musashi]

i dont know who needs to hear this but being unpersoned online is a legitimately traumatic experience. i was diagnosed professionally with PTSD in 2011 after some ex-friends of mine made a massive callout post on deviantart where they called me slurs, suicide baited me, and made fun of my struggles with addiction & alcoholism, as well as just fucking lambasting me for being visibly autistic. they did this under the moral guise of "outing a toxic friend" when in reality my biggest crime was literally just being 15 years old, struggling with mental health, and just being kind of obnoxious. They then followed me, like pathologically so, from social media to social media in an attempt to justify their obsessive harassment of me, lurking every blog I had and methodically collecting evidence as to why I deserved to be unpersoned, attacked, and stalked.

The accusations ran the gamut, from abuse to Nazism to pedophilia. Literally every horrible thing they could think of and construe my posts to be about. At the height of it we had to pull my preteen sibling out of school because of the threats and doxxing.

This has literally never stopped. I am now nearly 30 and just by virtue of having some meaningless internet clout I am still constantly singled out and harassed. I had a kiwifarms thread at one point and I was told it was quite active.

Obviously, as time goes on I learn how to cope with the PTSD and the OCD I developed much later. The good news about all this is that it does not meaningfully affect my quality of life anymore. Making friends is not hard, most of them have not heard about what fringe weirdos are saying about some nobody, and thankfully it also shields me because anyone who DOES engage with call-out posts is not someone I would ever in a million years want to associate with. So overall, a net win.

But like, that can coexist with the fact that I lost my fucking adolescence and early adulthood to online harassment. Literally whole chunks of my developmental years. Just fucking gone, dude. And even if I can cope with it, that doesn't mean I want to have to. I want to just live a comfortable, normal life, where I don't have to think about freaks all circle jerking about some nonsense crime I did not commit, or some harmless thing I said that they have decided is worth stripping me of my humanity over.

All this to say, your lead poisoning jokes are not fucking funny? That situation was not some haha funny silly goofy moment for Wendy. I have to not react to it because if I react to it I will be unpersoned harder, look at how bothered this freakazoid is over fandom lolololol etc. But the fact of the matter is hundreds of people decided to unperson, harass, lie about, and degrade me simply because I had an entirely unremarkable headcanon about a fictional villain. The headcanon humanized him. And they were mad about that, and chose to unperson me for it.

Regardless of where it comes from, fandom or not, that is traumatic. I don't understand why I have to explain to people that that is traumatic. Whole groups of those people on Twitter still stalk me, post screenshots of me having fun to laugh at, and refer to me solely as "the lead poisoning guy," and not by name. I am literally not a person to them, but something to point and laugh at. And if I advocate for myself or react, I become even more of a joke.

Please do not fucking make jokes about it at me? Unless we are VERY close friends and you were one of the people who was there for me when I was dealing with that. If you are a stranger you have absolutely no right to fucking make jokes about a horrible experience of mine and then cover your ass with "bro it's just a joke!!!" My feelings are not a fucking joke.

people on this website can be so mean for no reason

[clownspiral]

spiral headcanons!!

- michael & helen are both very!! fond of gabriel 

 - dr david wears goofy ass spiral glasses. u know the ones 

 - gabriel is Literally made out of clay. like All of him, even his clothes 

 - michael & helen Both consider themselves as the big sibling & the other as the little sibling 

 - the distortion throws spiral-avatar-only parties in its hallways sometimes. p much everyone loves these parties. there's a roller rink in there, & probably more than one disco ball. every room has different music playing 

 - michael & helen do not agree on how 2 decorate the hallways & basically split ownership fifty-fifty. michael is appalled by the normalcy of helen's side and helen is appalled by the clashing colors michael chooses for its side 

 - michael & helen play a lot of games to pass time. just like, normal games but in a Completely not normal way. their winning rate is pretty 50/50 but michael is a sore loser when she wins 

 - helen fills in as a nurse 4 doctor david sometimes. she brings a wanderer to him and acts like everything they just saw in her hallways is just a lie they're making up ("i have completely normal hands, stop being crazy"), and dr david handles the rest! 

 - working 2gether is pretty customary between spiral avatars. they're kinda like a family 

 - michael and gabe camp out 2gether in an abandoned house they repurposed in2 their home. in the basement, gabe makes sculptures there (some of the distortions model for) and michael has a space 4 painting! 

 - being a muse for gabriel's sculpting helps michael feel a little better abt the whole Having a Body thing 

 - michael likes to rest its head on human friends’ chests & listen 2 their heart beat 

 -  sergey ushanka (eating-my-computer guy) communicates w/ the other spiral avatars primarily thru e-mails 

 - dr david is like.. genuinely in2 science. he runs a lot of tests on the distortion & tries 2 figure out how the hell their body even works, which always turns out 2 be a fun & impossible challenge

- the distortion wears p normal clothes when it's playing human but that goes To The Wind as soon as it decides 2 let the disguise go. spirals r hidden everywhere in its clothes, some subtle & some like. Right in ur face. its wardrobe is full of eye-burning neons and colors that dont exist. it makes its own clothes 

 - gabriel likes to crawl into tight spaces and just.. stay there. for a while. makes him feel like his whole body is getting a hug 

 - gabe can be pretty shy around individuals he doesnt know. he's also typically pretty anxious of non-spiral avatars 

 - the distortion can like. Become Light. like... physically. at will. 

 - so much gender going on in that place. no identity is off the table 4 anyone 

 - lowkey got beef with the stranger. nikola & the distortions specifically have a Weird relationship where they would absolutely kill each other at the drop of a hat but also like.. sometimes have tea and gossip abt avatar stuff, yknow? the others kinda just hate her tho </3 

 - michael finds the eye absolutely pathetic LOL 

 - the distortion is kinda.. a celebrity figure almost?? everyone in the spiral knows who ure talking abt as soon as u bring up doors 

 - michael & helen both love drama & wont hesitate 2 spread fake rumors just cuz theyre bored. they laugh abt it 2gether as they watch fights start up over their bs 

 - helen tells michael abt jonah's body when she finds out & it's just kinda like LMFAOOO WHAT? ? cuz it genuinely didnt know abt that 

 - there's a big sense of distrust between michael & helen. it especially feels like she's waiting 2 betray it, esp since it's technically its fault that helen got taken. they dont grow Paranoid of each other, exactly, but neither ever fully turns their back 2 the other, yknow?

- helen talks michael's ear off abt real estate stuff & the critiques the design of the hallways & michael has No comment 

 - the spiral sibs are pretty good at figuring out what the hell the other one is doing. they kinda have a hard time hiding things frm each other (it's probably not Impossible but it's definitely not as easy as it is w/ everyone else) 

 - none of the avatars have a Strong Grasp of the concept of.. "having a body". basically all of em are able 2 shapeshift 2 some degree, w/ a good chunk of em being just like. full-on shapechangers 

 - the worker of clay was dating neil lagorio in the 70s & was kinda like >:-( hmph when he was taken by the web instead of joining the worker in the spiral 

- dr david was andre ramao's husband before the spiral took him. he was a normal doctor when he was with andre 

 - gabe snorts when he laughs 

 - the distortion's "human" form is always pretty tall 

 - the distortion cannot be successfully lied to. though sometimes it'll let you Think you got away w/ lying  

 - when it needs to move around a lot with a physical human form, the distortion uses bodily braces in order to keep its bones/joints Mostly where they're meant to be 

 - the distortion needs to switch into and take care of the human body it uses in order to keep it looking right. it's kind of like keeping a plant alive except the plant is a physical extension of You 

 - It Is Not What It Is and It Knows You make each other pretty uncomfortable 

[pinkdevile]

In defense of: steve harrington and billy hargrove.

the lawyer(me✨) shall begun:

first of all, thank you all for having me in this commom day where nothing except my boredom and good mood is above average. ill show the jury the proof that those two dudes who are not my clients but i like them are not bullies.

Steve Harrington: he's well off enough, hes 16 in the first season and a pretty nice boyfriend. he has asshole friends and so what? everybody has some of those. oh, he slut shames Nancy? He just saw his girlfriend in the room with a boy that he knows is from the circle of people she knows (being the older brother of mike's best friend that went missing, also he took pictures of nancy and steve in a intimate moment, wtf jonathan.) then he did something dumb. But honestly, he was quite level headed about this whole shit.

He called Jonathan a slur but so what? Literally so what? thats the 80s if you dont wanna hear about slurs then peace out. he helped clean that thing he vandalized that i forgot the name because English before he goes after Nancy and Jonathan to apologize, he choses to do the right thing over doing things out of guilt. Thats a fucking awesome thing.

His only crime is being to easy to have his ass handed. Let this man beat someone up.

Billy Hargrove: Yeah this dude is sucks (cock) but hey i like him. Everybody knows the shit he went through, shitty dad, shitty mom, sudden shittier step mom, annoying lil step sister. my dude is an angel for not having commited a felony by now. People accuse him of being racist because Lucas is black and he seems to hate the kid, i think is more because Lucas liked Max, and Max kinda has a soft spot for him in the S2 and Billy sees it. Hes not racist, hes a hater. Also, Max going missing is a shitty thing to do, then going missing and being found in a strangers house that everyone knows is from the zombie boy Will, brother of the creep Jonathan that takes compromising pictures of people in the bushes. Maybe he doesnt know the rumors, but damn if the house doesnt give him the heebejeebies, and he probable knows because Tommy H. and Carol works faster than the schools newspapper. So he sees an the guy he was trying to assert dominance in a gay kinda of way in the shitty house where his shitty sister is hiding, and the guy straight up lie to his face. Then he decides to clock the boy down as much as it hurt his heart (pretty boy harrington. ..), and then he sees Lucas and Max plus other 3 boys and he thinks: oh fuck.

Then he is drugged and almost dickcapped by said shitty lil sister. and he is impressed, but also scared because he just got his ass handed by his sister.

Conclusion: they both need to kiss and commit crimes.

PLUS: they talk like old people.

EDITED FOR CLARITY AND I WILL ALSO ADD: why the fuck hate steve for saying a slur to an not actual gay when he is best friends with an actual gay person. Neither Billy or Steve are shown bullying people in the show, Billy drinks beer and is a mean bisexual, Steve is a human labrador (hes dumb and cute and strong and he will bite you no matter the odds). Fuck the duffers, can i get an hell yeah?

ANOTHER EDIT:

so i just read online that Dacre refused to say a racial slur towards Lucas and my disappointment is imeasurable but not surprisingly. So i am now 50/50 with racist Billy and just paranoid Billy. in both cases hes an asshole. At least im relieved to know that Lucas would lay his ass on basketball.

[satans-left-asscheeky]

Three step programs to help get your favorite fallout companion to love you / become your little bitch Part 2

Danse

Is your paladin a depressed synthetic chump laking the ad victorium in his artificial existence? Is your paladin crying into his pillow at night while chanting "For Elder Maxon"? Did your Paladin go from "For the brotherhood" to "I'm just misunderstood" in a matter of 24 hours? Have you noticed your paladins mood becoming increasingly self deprecating; for example has your paladin starting saying things like "First I lost Cutler and now myself"? While here's 3 easy steps to help teach your country music loving steel hunky some self love and get him back to his usual polysyllabic self faster than a feral can tare the flesh off your ass!

Step one: Get in and out of power armor... it's not a fetish it's for protection!.... And also mod his power armor so your paladin can get his dummy thicc assets into the steel contraption more smoothly and have a better range of over all mobility on the field.

Step two: take your paladin for long walks and allow him to shoot down any and all vertibirds that are in sight. Sending his past back to hell in a mental unstable and unhinged manner, that is completely out of character is the ultimate form of self care for him. New minute new genocidal paladin who probably desperately needs help! (hey at least he's warming up to the idea of synths.... baby steps?)

Step Three: Kill the fuck outta supermutans! This will help your Paladin get the vengeance he so desperately craves for his dear friend Cutler. Turning them into energy goop on the ground is almost as satisfying as modding armor.... almost.

Please keep your paladin aware of his surrounding to insure a vertibird doesn't raze near by settlement... your paladin may become irritable at the mere sight of them so be sure to listen for the steel fuckers... If your dummy thicc paladin experiences an increasing need to kill his ex brothers in arms please contact your nearest Curie.

Curie

Is your Curie struggling to adapt to life outside of her old steel cage? Is your Curie spending an unreasonable amount of time mourning the loss of the Vault-tec doctors? Does your Curie struggle to understand even the most basic social norms, yet somehow manages to recite every muscle in alphabetical order? While much like good ol' Austin back in Vault 81 we've got the cure for you! (there's only one dose though so be sure to stick to the following three rules exactly to avoid spontaneous combustion)

Step one: Show your Curie the world! Help your Curie venture out into the hellish post apocalyptic boston! Show her all sorts of vile and life threatening mutations that only this brave new world of wonders can offer.

Step two: Teach your Curie to look on the brightside... In the misdt of an atomic fire induced anarchy, show your Curie the jaw dropping newly legal experiments due to lack of law enforcement!

Step three: Help your Curie help others! nothing is more rewarding to your Curie than getting praise from complet strangers to help her feel more human.

Please make sure your Curie doesn't take ANY advice from doc crocker... like ever....

Deacon

Have you noticed your Deacon- no you haven't. But in the instance that you somehow possess telepathic abilitys here's what to look out for....

Is Deacon becoming increasingly distant? Has your Deacon been popping stealth boys in the middle of the night (and not for *ehem* solo nocturnal experiments as curie would say....) Has your Deacon become increasing sloppy and not his normal pathological lying self? Is helping synths not helping fill the seemingly endless void in your Deacons heart. Well my telepathic friend here's some tips and tricks to turn your Deacons frown upside-down!

Step One: Lie your ass off. Fully adapt the mentality that Lying truly is the most fun a girl can have....

Step Two: Pranks! Fill Carringtons pillow with cram? Hell yeah! Shave Glorys eyebrows off while she's sleeping? Damn straight. Convince Tinker Tom that the institute now is putting listening devices inside unsuspecting victims butts? Abso-fucking-lutely!!!

Step Three: Costumes!!! Take your Deacon on a shopping spree. Make your Deacons wardrobe look like a portal to Narnia with all those outfits.

If your Deacon is in desperate need for medical attention after shaving Glorys eyebrows DONT take him to Dr. Carrington or a bitch might end up as another name to cross off the board....

Still didn't get tips for your favorite companion? Stay tuned for part three!

(Ps sorry this took so dang long to finish a bitch be needing some sadaway. Also if this is more shit than post that's why....) Part three hopefully will be out sooner no promises though.

<- Part one

Part three ->

[simplydivinetv]

Some weeks ago at around 4:40 PM roughly on May 23rd, 2024, I was the victim of a homophobic assault on my school campus. I was walking with my friend when a gray dodge charger pulled up and a dude got out, grabbed my friend & pushed him down on2 the grass. this person then approached me, shoved me against the iron fence behind me in the video, & struck me across the right side of my face. The left side of my face was slammed against the fence, resulting in a split 2 the left corner of my upper lip, & lesions 2 the inside of my mouth, due 2 my braces cutting my lip & inside of my cheek. I'm additionally suspicious by looking at my teeth & seeing one on the left side appears crooked. It's little things like these that I am overanalyzing lately abt my appearance 2 see if this attack has caused more damage than i think it has. i also received a cut on my left elbow from the fence & my hearing was also noticeably uneven after the attack, with my left ear (the side that got hit against the fence) being more muted. All of these injuries have (thankfully) since healed.

the guy proceeded 2 yell obscenities at me, none of which i can remember, cuz i was quite literally HIT, except 4 the last two words being “f****t ass” (not fat… the #Other f-word). well! i was also struggling to retrieve my phone from my pocket so i could try and catch the car, which is when i started recording that video everybody saw of me with the bleeding mouth.

the driver of the car got out after he saw my friend get up, & then the driver just stood by the car & did nothing. they both got back in the car & drove away.

myself & my friend immediately went inside our school & reported this incident 2 the student services at my school (even though there was nobody there when we got 2 the office- we were forced 2 navigate the whole gigantic school & find a ‘learning director’ & the only person even available in the building) & they did-

Nothing…

the ‘learning director’ whom we had 2 go 2 didn't seem 2 take the thing seriously, & when she ‘escorted’ me out 2 my mother’s car, she joked how this was a good opportunity 4 her 2 get her steps in… ya.

i was interrogated by student services the day after. my mother & i had typed up a police report 2 give 2 both the police & the student services, but the latter made me write out a whole new one when they called me in & asked about what happened. When i wrote down that the guy called me a homophobic slur, the guy in student services asked me 2 write what he specifically said, then proceeded 2 READ THE SLUR OUT LOUD 2 ME ?!??

even tho i dont like the police, but they possibly would have done more than our school at this point … myself & my mother filed a police report & spoke 2 an officer about the incident, & nothing rlly happened from that either (surprise. that’s the police 4 u). However, almost a week after the event, on Wednesday, May 29th, we received a call from the guy from student services (slur repeater) who was working on the incident, & informed us that they had found out who it was, but they would not tell us due 2 “privacy reasons”.

???

even though i was assaulted, protecting the persons whom did it was clearly the priority, & my safety & peace of mind was not.

he also said he wanted 2 speak with me that week & would pull me out of class, bc they had allegedly interrogated the culprit & he said something “shocking”, that they wanted 2 discuss with me. i was never called that week. the week after was our finals week/last week of school & he didn’t pull me out that week either. so i guess ill never know what was gonna go down. It was probably 4 the best, bc yeah right! i was gonna have to sit & listen 2 the claims of some random stranger ive never met FROM SOMEBODY ELSE. icing on the cake being that the cowardly “explanation” would b abt why he pulled up in a car 2 assault my friend & i b4 driving off. Obviously gonna b a lazily-come up with lie, meaning it was not like it was gonna b anything of value 2 me anyway. whatever. He made it sound like i was the one in trouble & like they were gonna turn this around & pin the whole blame on me anyway.

overall- i am okay. My friend is as well. Speaking with him abt what happened rlly helped me through this whole circus. i was upset that this has happened & i understand that it is not my fault. i carried a little bit of regret over the past few weeks. Over not knowing who the two guys were, over not getting a pic of their license plate number (i didnt want 2 run in the street after them bc i was worried that they could reverse their car & hit me. i mean come on- i WAS just slammed into a fence- would u have gotten the pic?? -there was also apparently no cameras in that specific part of my school, but there r cameras literally everywhere else??) regret over my friend being hurt & my family, friends, & fans being worried abt me.

But i got over it. I did nothing to deserve this, & all of the people in my world who have been lovingly supporting me know this. This shouldn’t have had to happen to me or my friend to make us stronger or bring us closer together. It happened & it shouldn’t have, & i dont want to hear that it was 4 good reason.

the last thing that i want is 2 feel sorry 4 myself, & the second to last thing i want is 2 b afraid. & i refuse 2 feel that way. i want 2 thank all of my fans & close friends & family & teachers & neighbors who have reached out 2 ask if i was okay. it’s not smth that im used 2 receiving & it has been so nice <3

as i said w/ the release of (Like A) Rainbow, writing my second mixtape has been extremely cathartic in helping get over the trauma in this event, & has been helpful in allowing me 2 not think of it as much & look at it from my own unique entertainer’s perspective. idk… on the brite side maybe getting hatecrimed the week b4 i released a Pride Month single is promo ! idk !

i want anybody going thru something similar 2 kno: this is NOT ur fault. ppl r always gonna b weird & even violent towards u & those ppl r only going 2 bring trouble or guilt 2 themselves. this is true, i promise u. keep being who u r, & don’t ever suppress who u r in fear of violence or some1 yelling something at u (unless this is a safety concern 4 u & where ur located. Stay safe!). I kno how hard it can b 4 those of us living in unsafe homes & environments. We as queer ppl will have 2 deal with this type of thing 4 a long time 2 come i fear. Plz stay safe & know that one day u will b able 2 escape those surroundings & b whatever u want 2 b. until then, take care of urself by whatever means. x

I would rather live everyday being chewed up & destroyed by society while living how i want 2 (i literally do- so… what now?) than die safely being something that i never want to be.

happy pride month <3

Love & victory,

David, PKA Divad Divine… HO!!! HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i’m still skinny 🤷🏽 so idek what the point wuz…

[hela-avenger]

it’s not you, it’s me- part 2

Author: hela-avenger

Word Count: 1041

Summary: Natasha won’t quit trying to set you up so you decide to play fire with fire. Hence making a deal with an insufferable prince who interestingly enough is willing to fake being in love with you for the rest of the night. Of course when dealing with the God of Lies things are never as they seem. Fake-Dating AU. p&w AU.

A/N: If you haven’t read poison & wine it is ok to read this but there will be some references to it and p&w is completed. As for my p&w loyal readers, ENJOY!

P.S. I’m tagging the p&w people so if you’ll like to be taken off pls do let me know!

Tags are open!

poison & wine masterlist & it’s not you, it’s me masterlist

You tear yourself away from his hold causing Loki to chuckle at your immediate retreat. You stumble as you try to put some space between you two. It didn’t make sense how Loki came to find that truth when many others, others who have known you longer, have yet to figure it out. 

“What are you talking about?” 

“Oh, a good liar buys time,” Loki responds. “A great liar would have already been ready with a response.” 

Loki leans his back against the balcony with a smirk. 

“So?” he asks. “Will you answer my question or do you need more time to come up with a lie?” 

“You’re an ass,” you mutter under your breath. 

“Now that’s not a nice thing to say to your date,” Loki mockingly reprimands. “What would Natasha say about that foul mouth of yours?” 

“You know what?” you stammer out in annoyance. “I’ve changed my mind. I’ll rather go through mindless conversations with Natasha’s bachelors than to spend another second here with you.” 

You don’t make it too far as Loki grabs a hold of your arm. 

“Retreating so easily?” Loki asks. “Now I didn’t peg you as a quitter.” 

“We’ve just met,” you snap at him. “Stop presuming so much about me.” 

“Then I must ask you to do the same with me.” 

Your anger disappears when you hear this from him. You should know better than to judge a book by its cover and yet you had. 

You blatantly used his status without thinking of the connotation it held. 

“I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable before,” you whisper as you turn around to face him. “It wasn’t my intention and I presumed you would be game to help me.” 

“Oh, believe me, I am,” Loki chuckles. “But I detest my tormentous past being brought up so casually.” 

“I was being honest when I said that I wasn’t using you to scare potential suitors away and I had no intention for Jeff to bring up your past,” you confess to him. “Thor told me you have a way with words and well… he called you Silvertongue so it just further proved you would be the best person I could ask to help me right now.”

Loki continues to stare and you can’t help but compare his mannerisms to a curious raven.

“You’re not lying,” Loki states. “You haven’t since we met but that doesn’t mean I trust you.” 

“I mean, you shouldn’t,” you shrug. “I’m a complete stranger to you.” 

“As I am to you,” Loki remarks with a small tilt on his lips. “Are you saying you don’t trust me?” 

“I mean,” you answer with a laugh. “Who in their sane mind would agree to fake dating a stranger for the rest of the night?”   

Loki chuckles and shakes his head. 

“If this is to work, I need you to be completely honest with me,” Loki states. “I may be the God of Lies but I detest being lied to.” 

“Ok…” 

“So, going back to my previous question,” Loki trails off. “How long have you been lying to your friends about your true lineage?” 

You take a deep breath trying to ease yourself from the alarm running through your whole body. 

You still didn’t know how he came to find this out about you, but it didn’t matter at the moment. Loki had asked you a question and you had to offer a response. 

An honest response. 

“Apart from two, since I’ve first made their acquaintance,” you answer. “And technically I’m half-lying to them seeing as I’m half-human.” 

“What are you?” 

“A demigod. Half-human, half-God.” 

“Of Asgardian descent I presume?” 

“Yes,” you nod. “Found that out about a couple of years ago when your brother first came to Earth.”

“How old are you?” 

Foregoing making a joke about how rude it is to ask for a woman’s age, you answer his question.

“By Earth physical standards 24, but 198 in reality.” 

“Your parents?” 

“My mother died when I was 19, while my father is unknown,” you sigh feeling your chest tightening. “Are we done with this interrogation?”

Loki remains silent as he contemplates your question. He doesn’t stare at you this time which is a welcome reprieve, but it sealed him away from you. You didn’t know what he could be thinking or what mood he may have shifted to. 

“That will do for now,” Loki mutters. “We should head inside soon…” 

“Wait,” you interrupt him before he can even take a step towards the doors. “I just have one question for you.” 

“Which is?” he asks impatiently. 

“How did you know?” you ask. “How did you know I wasn’t human?” 

Loki responds by offering his hand for you to take. You look at it hesitantly forcing Loki to explain his intentions.

“I can show you.” 

With that being said, you take his hand. 

It surprisingly feels soft and warm and soon you realize why. There was some kind of energy running through him that seemed to reach for yours. 

“That,” Loki states. “That is how I knew.” 

“What is that?” you ask him as you pull your hand away. The connection is cut, but you can still feel the warmth tingling in your hand. “What did you do?” 

“It’s called seidr,” Loki answers. “Some Asgardians are blessed with the gift of magic so when we first touched, I felt that connection. That is how I knew that you weren’t completely human.” 

“But your brother…” 

“Thor can barely tell the difference between his precious Mjolnir and an actual hammer,” Loki snorts. “Besides, he’s not acutely aware of his surroundings like I am.” 

“Sounds like you’re paranoid.” 

“It’s because I am,” Loki states. “Villain, remember? I have many enemies who wish to see me fail. Many of them are at this party.”

You roll your eyes knowing he was referring to your friends. 

“Am I one of them?” you can’t help but ask. “An enemy?” 

Loki takes his time to respond. 

“Yet to be determined,” he answers before offering his arm for you to take. “Shall we begin our night now?”

Having been outside long enough, you take a deep breath and loop your arm around his allowing Loki to escort you back inside.

it’s not you, it’s me: @mywellspingoflife @toe-wind-ek-jou @mejusttryintogetby @marvelgirlonamarvelworld​ @nickkie1129​ @theinfinitenerd​

poison & wine: @damalseer @just-the-hiddles @jessiejunebug @nonsensicalobsessions @smollest-soybean @assassinoftheworld @readerbandit @doyoufeelikeayounggod @strangemcuvlogs @ha-tep @i-dont-know-eiither @gene-king @day-dreaming-fox @bn-studies @devilbat @victor-criss-bish @skinny-macncheese @musicconversedance @baby-bunnyxn @marvelloonie @sulbaeksul @queenmuahaha @accio-boys @eternalqueensworld @umlvk @roger-the-reindeer @punkrockhufflefluff​ @your-local-abyss @horsesandwolvesaremyanimals @rogerrhqpsody @imsad420 @pandacookieowo @justnerdystuffs @hanoi15 @oneprolificqueen @nikki-who-likes-coffee @fandomrelative @nikki419ninja @onedollarduck @help-i-need-a-social-life @ephemeraljade @catsladen @amwolowicz @captainmarvelnerd @thegirlbeyondtheuniverse @ddaeing @leftperfectionmoon

Loki Tag: @unicorniorosacomefrutillas @thesilentbluesparrow-blog @oddly-drawn-muse @josiehosiedaninja @hp-hogwartsexpress @sadwaywardkid @wolf-lover74 @sizzlingbarbarianglitter @sigyn-nightshade @aoirohi @horsesandwolvesaremyanimals @just-a-donut-who-reads @day-dreaming-fox @heykathchuu @is-it-madness

All Works: @jmb959 @astudyoftimeywimeystuff​ @hellocookiecutter​ @steve-rogers-personal-hell @buckybarnesyard @not-zari-tak​ @strangersstranger @thefridgeismybestie​ @moonlightprime @badhollandfluff @what-a-flammable-heart @fandoms-allovertheplace @polireader​ @hufflautia​

[aestheticsuwu]

🌌🕹°Time Travel is a Bitch 🕹°🌌

Part 1 / 2

Time travel au . Pairings : Sam LaRusso x Miguel Diaz, Robby Keene x Doug Rickenberger, Eli "Hawk" Moskowitz x Demetri .

....

A snippet how one mohawk teenager manages to time travel with unwilling friends to a time where both senseis were pining from a distance , now the thing was they now have to manage how to survive-only good thing they all get to meet Mr Miyagi but unfortunately for the old man has to undure chaotic kids .

......

Wtf

Was exactly what was on eveyones mind . They were all having a normal day at the dojo , everyone with their signaficent other just fooling aroud and conversating .

Then suddenly , Poof .

...... ....

Sam and Miguel were teaching each other new moves with a flirty banter , Tory was letting Moon braid her hair while adding adorable pins . Hawk was rummaging through the boxes of Mr. Larusso and Mr. Myagi with Demetri .

While he was laying back  in between Dougs legs and skimmy through the pages of Mr. Larusso yearbook  .

" She looks hot "

Turning to glare at his dumb giraffe of a boyfriend that has no right to be looking at other people while he has a whole snack on his lap .

" Damn . "

" Dougie , Im this close to hitting you with this damn book .  " He wasn't kidding .

" Im sorry , baby . " Rolling his eye and pouting after hearing Doug chuckle .

" Give me a kiss . Robby , Robby . You know your the only one i want , pretty boy . Give me a kiss . "

" Ok " Turning around to kiss him , because hey ! , he's human after all and he lives off of affection now.

Everyone was to busy in their own little bubble that they didn't hear Demetri telling Hawk to stop .

" Eli , i think we should leave that alone . "

" Dem , dont worry . I got it under control just because the warning said not to- uh oh . "

" Eli ! "

" Whats going on guys ? "

Miguel rushed after hearing Demetri , Sam walking behind him to see what had happened .

" Nothing , right Dem ? "

" uhhh .... Yeah.  i was just overreacting like always "  Elbowing his boyfriend for making him lie , He was already feeling guilty . Demetri just hoped there wouldn't be consequences. 

You see in that moment they should've confronted the situation throughly. Knowing Godamn Eli Moskowitz was a crazy chaoctic dude that was never up to no good .

Especially after Hawk had made up that tazer tag game dragging Doug into the mess .

But they all turned a blind eye . Why ? Well because they needed the peace and quiet .

Hawk didn't quite get the assignment .

Moon and Tory left after saying they had a date planned for the afternoon . They left hand in hand looking in love as ever .

Doug was helping him get up from the floor when suddenly everything started to shake and if it wasnt for his boyfriend he would've ended up on the floor .

" What the hell is going on ! " , He shouted , wrapping his arms around Doug while the lights flickered .

 

Sam and Miguel were holding hands while trying to maintain balance over the turbulance of the floor .

" Shit , shit , shit shit ." Demtri kept chanting over and over . Alongside Hawk who was looking at Demetri as he hold onto a box .

It didnt help their case when Hawk opened his mouth , being the last thing they all heard.

" Were about to die , no cap fam ! "

Suddenly it all turn black .

..... ...... ....

Robby didn't like to point fingers but he's totally going to since he had a feeling it was Hawks fault .

Waking up felt like the worst hangover he ever had while he had to look at his surrondings . It was dark and no sign of no one .

Furrowing his eyebrows , confused at the sudden change of location.  He rubbed his temples to ease the headache , He starts calling out to his boyfriend .

Because well Sam and Demetri would look for their boyfriend . If not , then he was a really bad friend .

" Doug ! , Doug ! Rickenberger ! "  He was met with silence . Reaching his pocket to call his Doug and his friends but it was nowhere to be found .

He swore that if they were pranking him right now he would kick their asses .

Turning around quickly once hearing someone call his name but couldn't find the person .

" Keene ! "  He knew that voice ! Running towards the silhouette , hoping it was his boyfriend and not a stranger that he was about to jump on .

Crashing to his boyfriends body holding on tight , he feels the other arms squeeze him while he gave him kisses on his hair .

Both sighing of relief , until Doug pushed him away to look at him .

" Where the fuck were you !? " The taller boy asked , slightly raising his voice . He was scared for a moment thinking he had lost his short boyfriend .

" I was here ? Where were you ? Where's the rest of the guys !? .  " A look of panic crosses his face realising none of his friends were around . Doug dismissed his questions and took a hold of his hand taking him somewhere.

The rest of the group was outside of a dinner that he never seen before . Somehow they all looked different . Sam no longer had highlights and Hawks Mohawk was gone and no hint of hairdye in his auburn hair .

They all looked shaken up like they all seen a ghost . Catching his breath as Demetri passes him a newspaper . Everyone waiting for him to read , guess they forgot about his dyslexic ass .

Headlines with a bunch of shit he clearly didnt have time for , something about a mall's grand opening and Coke raising up sells but what made him feel like hhis lungs stopped was the date .  Nowhere near 2021 that was for sure .

Ring of bells rang once the door from the Dinner had opened . Laughter coming from the direction of a group of teenagers wearing red leathered jackets just mocking them .

Were fucked .

Oh god , they always had to deal with his dad and Mr. LaRusso pining now they have to deal with their teenage pining . He couldnt catch a break .

" We're Fucked . "

" And not in a good way ." They all turn to glare at Hawk after the words left from his mouth .

[hyunderwater]

i love you(r cats) 03

pairing: mingi x yunho (ateez)

warnings: swearing, strangling mention (only a couple sentences between “'What if he says no? What if he rejects me, and I ruin everything?'” and "He’s my best friend, Mingi wanted to say.")

genre: strangers-to-lovers, romance, absolutely tooth-rotting fluff

summary: movie night!! yayy! also Feels, and i dont mean the twice song

wc: 1.4k (sry about a shorter ch)

ao3 link<-

01-02-03-04-05

He smoothed out the creases in his jeans.

He was nervous.

His doorbell rang.

He dashed out of his seat.

He paused in front of the door, making the other wait.

He didn’t want to seem too desperate.

He reached out and opened the door.

“Mingi!”

Yunho’s smile was bright enough that Mingi was half convinced any spectators would see his face lit up like he was burning under a spotlight.

“Yunho!”

Yunho walked into Mingi’s apartment, brushing right past him to cuddle the cats.

“Who are my beautiful babies? Hi lovies! Oh, you guys got even more adorable!”

Mingi couldn’t help rolling his eyes.

“Uh, I seem to remember that these cats are mine?”

Yunho looked over his shoulder. He gave Mingi the stink eye then just turned back to lavishing the cats with his affection.

“Traitors,” Mingi muttered as his stupid cats went back to nuzzling against Yunho’s hands.

Yunho just smirked, that bitch.

“Don’t get too smug, they’re just attention whores.”

Yunho raised his eyebrows.

“Maybe they just don’t get enough affection from their owner, huh?”

Mingi scoffed.

“That’s cheap. You know I love these two lil monsters.”

Mingi smiled affectionately at the cats.

They simply stared back.

“Hm.”

“Shut up, Yunho. You weren’t invited here to watch my cats crush my heart under their cute furry paws, okay?”

“Then we should do what I actually came here for, yeah?” Yunho lifted himself up from the floor with a grandpa-esque groan.

“What are you, eighty? Jeez.”

Mingi hauled himself off of the floor with comparative ease. He smirked triumphantly at Yunho. “See, I’m not-“ He straightened up fully, and his knee popped loudly.

“Fuck.”

Yunho burst into raucous laughter.

“Welcome to the senior citizens club.”

Mingi rolled his eyes again.

“Your eyes are gonna fall out soon if you keep rolling them like that.”

Mingi rolled his eyes yet again and scoffed loudly.

“Bullshit.”

“My mom told me that!,” Yunho protested.

Mingi smiled. “Let me guess, you rolled your eyes too much as a teenager and she tried to scare you to make you stop.”

Yunho gaped at him. “No. No, fuck you, my mom wouldn’t do that! No. She wouldn’t…?”

He trailed off, realization sinking in.

“See?”

He shook his head vehemently.

“Stop ruining my childhood, let’s just watch the goddamn movie.”

- 🐈 - 🐈 -

They ended up watching The Aristocats after much deliberation, because if there was one thing they could both agree on, it was cats.

There was one thing that they had both forgotten to tell each other that quickly became revealed within the first minutes of plot development.

They cried like babies at the slightest hint of emotion.

As the butler threw the poor cats out into the snow, Mingi buried his damp face into Yunho’s shoulder.

The soft sweater smelled like him, like lavender and warmth and cinnamon with the slightest hint of the familiar musk of cats.

He smelled like familiarity and something new, all at once.

Mingi felt a bit dizzy, but he couldn’t bear to tear himself away from Yunho’s warmth.

He felt Yunho start to lean toward him, and he panicked.

Is he going to push me off? Is he going to kiss my head? Is he gonna leave? Is he gonna let me lie down in his lap?

He felt Yunho’s breath brush across his head, and he resisted the urge to flinch.

“Are you crying? Fucking loser.”

Mingi lifted his head up to glare at Yunho better.

“Wait, you fucking ass, you’re crying too!”

Yunho huffed out a laugh, aggressively dragging a sweater paw across his eyes.

Stop being so cute and annoying at the same time, fucking asshole.

He turned back to Mingi, eyes sparkling.

“I guess I can’t talk then, huh?”

He reached out a hand drowning in blue knit, out towards Mingi’s still-teary face.

The material was slightly scratchy against his face, but the affection in Yunho’s eyes was more than enough to make up for it.

When did he start looking at me like that? And why does it seem more than just platonic?

Yunho gave him a fond smile.

“You look cute when you’re confused. Come on, let’s watch the movie.”

Yunho turned back to the screen, but Mingi’s eyes refused to leave the silhouette of the other.

What do you want from me? Mingi wondered as Yunho laughed at something on the screen, his nose scrunching up in the kind of way that makes anyone look positively adorable.

And Jeong Yunho wasn’t just anyone.

Mingi woke up to a soft sweater, fingers petting his hair, and a wicked crick in his neck.

“Ow,” he rasped.

The fingers flew out of his hair.

He vaguely registered his reluctance to let them go.

“You’re awake.”

Mingi turned his half-lidded, sleepy eyes on Yunho.

“No shit, Sherlock,” he yawned.

The apartment seemed darker; it was pitch-black outside.

“Hold on, how long was I asleep? How did it get so dark?”

“You were asleep for… maybe two, three hours? You looked really tired, I didn’t want to wake you...”

Mingi squinted up at Yunho.

“You let me sleep on you for two or three hours? Holy- are all of your limbs asleep or something?”

Yunho shrugged.

“Just a little bit.”

“Can you move?”

“Just a little bit.”

“Why do you keep saying that? Are you broken?”

A mischievous smile crept onto Yunho’s face.

“Just a little bit.”

Mingi smacked his shoulder lightly.

“Shut up, you dummy.”

- 🐈 - 🐈 -

They began meeting once a week at Mingi’s apartment.

Mingi would clean up, and make sure he had a good selection of movies available, along with fluffy blankets.

Yunho would bring a large spread of snacks, and occasionally small treats for the cats.

Ever since the first time Mingi fell asleep on Yunho, they had become more comfortable with each other.

The second week, they were only a few inches apart on the couch, dangerously close to touching.

The week after that, they found themselves with their thighs pressed together side by side on the couch.

The next week, Mingi found his head on Yunho’s shoulder again, and Yunho’s arm snaked around his shoulders.

The next week, Yunho’s arm dipped down to circle his waist.

The next week, Mingi’s head was in Yunho’s lap.

The next week, they turned sideways on the couch, with Yunho half-spooning Mingi.

The next week, Mingi fell asleep with his head tucked in the crook of Yunho’s neck.

The week after that, Mingi could swear he felt Yunho press a kiss to the top of his head as he slipped into sleep.

“Yeosang, it’s killing me! He acts all platonic and ‘bestie vibes only’ and whatever half the time, but the other half of the time, he’s kissing my head and spooning me and hugging me and being nice to my cats! It’s like he’s unintentionally doing everything to make me fall in love with him!”

Yeosang, who had definitely been listening to everything Mingi was saying instead of staring longingly at the coffee in his hands, suddenly snapped back into the conversation.

“Love?,” he sputtered. “Remind me how long you’ve known this dude again?”

Mingi averted his eyes.

“Um. Two months.”

Yeosang stared at him again, but for a different reason.

“Two months.”

Mingi nodded sheepishly.

“And you still haven’t made a move.”

Mingi’s shoes seemed super enthralling at the moment.

“Well.”

Yeosang cursed under his breath, muttering something about stupid idiots not realizing that all of the solutions to their problems are right under their stupid idiot noses.

“Dude.”

Mingi whined and complained in a mutter-y, unintelligible voice.

Yeosang just gave him a look.

“If what I’ve heard about this guy is anything to go by, I think you should ask him out.”

Mingi bit his lip, quieting down immediately.

“What if he says no? What if he rejects me, and I ruin everything?”

Mingi could picture it already, the fragile silky fabric of their relationship tearing into millions of luxurious threads before his eyes.

He pictured the threads circling around his throat, cutting off his air.

He’s my best friend, Mingi wanted to say.

He’s my favorite person, Mingi wanted to say.

He didn’t say either of those things.

Instead, all he said was, “Do you think there’s a chance he’d say yes?”

“Yeah,” Yeosang said, looking at him like he could see right through him to the barest parts of his soul. “I think he’d be stupid not to.”

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[muwur]

Since requests were open I was wondering if I could request father headcanons for iwai + ushi + atsumu 🥺 btw your writing is vv tasty n I can’t wait to see you write more !! Keep up the good work n stay safe !!

haikyuu daddee headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for iwaizumi, ushijima, and atsumu

❧ gn reader

✎ 1.4k words

a/n: omg u called my writing taSTY Dx i cri tySM 💞 that is a high compliment for me AHAHAHAH ILY and ty for the request! 

also my lovelies i m back i m sry i was gone so long feojfe i miss yall <3 here u go enjoi, this was fun to write lmk if yall want more characetrs AHAHA

current listen: accidentally in love by sHREK AAHAH jkjk i mean counting crows, they cant take that away from me by ella fitzgerald and louis armstrong, love the way you lie by eminem and rihanna

requests: open!

iwaizumi

✧ prePARED daddy

✧ picked up on this parenting thing p fast, also does a lot of research so he’s ready to face any situation

✧ teaches his kids how to behave n respect others

✧ also makes sure they know not to talk to strangers and teaches them some self defense

✧ be warned these kids are packing a surprise can of whOOP ASS,, dont fuck w them,, plus u wouldnt want buff daddee iwa on ur tail

✧ honestly his kids would be ANGELS ,,, n thats cuz he treats them all so w e l l

✧ mans is ATTENTIVE. he asks his kids about their days, their interests, and encourages discussion about their fEELINGS 🥺

✧ always offers them really valuable and light-hearted advice

✧ and gives them the love and transparency we all wanted but never had--

✧ however his kids are easily (n negatively) influenced esp when uncle oikawa comes to visit--

✧ but mostly bc iwa gets annoyed and slips out a lot of curse words and a “shittykawa” and then his kids started calling oikawa that and now it’s ingrained in them forever fjoefefgfvi (*distant phlattykawa crying noises*)

✧ gives them LOTS of head pats and ruffles as signs of affection

✧ PACKS THEIR SCHOOL LUNCHES and ensures they eat a balanced meal

✧ attends all their games/events,, will get a bit rowdy hype them up

✧ def lets his kids sleep with him when they’re having a bad night or woke up scared from a nightmare (and waits for them to fall asleep before going to sleep himself fojref)

✧ when they were babies he usually succeeded to get them to stop crying by pulling funny faces, showing them their favorite cartoons, or humming a lullaby

✧ when they get older,,, u bet iwa would be suPER protective esp when their kids start being iNtErEsTeD in other people

✧ you: “iwaizumi, they seem like a really nice kid, though”

✧ iwa: *sitting with you in the car, across the street from the ice cream parlor your child said they were at, and spying from the window* “you can’t trust everyone, of course they seem ‘nice,’ they just want our approval”

✧ definitely did not interrupt his child’s potential first kiss at their house’s doorstep by slamMINg the door open “sUDDENLY” cuz he “hEard TheIR vOicEs and THougHt TO lET them In”

✧ effectively traumatized both kids

✧ tho he felt bad after n u made him go apologize so he did (and he was forgiven, only if he agreed to never spy on them again--)

✧ doesn’t stop him from scrutinizing every person yalls kid introduces to you tho

✧ overall a super supportive dad, 11/10

ushijima

✧ ok dEF does not know much about parenting ,, at first

✧ stared at his child like ???nani when you both changed their first diaper

✧ also had plenty of staring contests with his babies ,,, called it bonding

✧ was curious and tasted baby food once,,, immediately regretted it

✧ once put a volleyball next to his child, who attempted to bite it, and took it as a sign that they liked it

✧ after sum time n practice, his mind becomes split between “how to volleyball” and “how to dad”

✧ catch him in the kitchen wearing an apron and whipping up his kids’ favorite smiley face pancakes 😤😤

✧ has an amazing ability to get his kids to stop crying, does really simple things like give them their favorite toy or place a gentle hand on their hand or attend to their needs (mans can tell if they want food or needa poop) and they calm down immediately

✧ carried them on his shoulders once and now they never stop asking him for shoulder rides (not that he minds anyway)

✧ if theres two kids he can probs carry one on each shoulder cuz cmon ,,, have u seen this man

✧ always goes to every performance/game/event his child takes part in

✧ man smiles so soft™ when he goes to the 1st grade play and sees his kid’s name in the program next to their role as “townsperson b” (next year, they upgraded to “singing carrot” in a play about the food pyramid)

✧ if his kid ends up enjoying volleyball, he will teach them e v e r y t h i n g they need to know

✧ but is overall super supportive of anything else his child pursues and doesn’t push anything onto them, would rather let them choose what they want to do

✧ had n o idea what to do when his kid asked him about the birds n the bees asfghkl

✧ couldnt sleep one night thinking about it and just randomly asks you while yall laying in bed in the dARk like “so our child asked me how babies are made and I told them they came from watermelon seeds” (you: 👁️👄👁️ “come again”)

✧ you: *at the grocery store with your child*

✧ child: *hands you watermelon* “I want a little brother!”

✧ you: “haha of course honey” 👁️👄👁️ what do i do (*later to ushijima* “duhfojhguf we needa get another baby i promised our child a younger brother fohurof” ; ushi: “wat” ; you: “itS YOUR FAULT”)

✧ yall eventually tell them not every watermelon can produce babies only really special ones that are really hard to get fhuoefkfotfi theyre not ready for the truth

✧ another great daddee, we stan

atsumu

✧ knew parenting was stressful esp with bABieS but was like eh it cant be that bad right

✧ think again

✧ g o o d b y e  s l e e p

✧ develops phat bags under his eyes, responds with a weak “aha im fine just that parenting life and the kids ykNOW” whenever his teammates ask if he’s oKAY

✧ tried to tempt his kids to eat their mush baby food by trying it himself, nearly gagged but was able to say “eughh yuMM”

✧ loves to lift them high up in the air, even throws them up a little and nearly drops them (yall almost died from feAR but babie was having so much fun,,, yall agreed to be just a bit more careful)

✧ rlly bad at getting them to stop crying, gets very stressed when he’s exhausted every option he can think of then calls you over for some help/advice (you: *immediately calms them down* ; ratsumu: “how--”)

✧ calls up osamu a lot to ask him how to make food ,, then simps whenever his twin brother comes over and the kids are in love with this man and his cooking (”dad why cant you make stuff as yummy as this”)

✧ very affectionate with his kids, gives them lots of hugs and kisses on the forehead

✧ plays with them a lot! whether it’s sports, just dance, animal crossing, or UNO, yOU NAME IT WE PLAY IT

✧ also has no mercy when playing competitive video or board games,, has made them cry more than once LOL

✧ so sometimes he toned it down n let them win,, until his kids actually got better and DEMOLISH him every time

✧ is cool with his kids cursing, just as long as they don’t do it in front of their teachers LMAO

✧ plays innocent when he gets a call from school saying his kid was using ‘inappropriate language’ and is like “whaaat? my child? im not even sure where they learned that, maybe check if the other kids in class are saying those things, too--”

✧ reminisces how much nicer his kids were to him when they were younger and all the time they spent together,,, bc now that they reached their tEeNS they want alone time

✧ wants to be B) cool dad so he tries kinda hard, esp in front of their friends but his kid’s just like dad pls dofjrgjigtgro

✧ also very supportive of whatever his kids want to pursue and dedicates time to help them in whatever ways he can (whether that be to help them practice, make sure he can provide transportation, get them supplies, etc)

✧ always playfully competing with you to see who’s the “better” parent (you win by default)

✧ PROTECTIVE dad and will easily intimidate ANYONE who crosses his kids

✧ takes sum adjustment and mental resilience but daddee atsumu perseveres  😤 absolutely loves his kids and would do anything for them