#freelancers are next!

[slyvester101]

The reds and blues as mer! (with a few exceptions)

Tex

Osprey: Dark brown, almost black, wings. Completely waterproof and meant to cut through the water, so she’s a fast swimmer. Likes doing this thing where she dives into the water and comes up flicking water up behind her. 

A really good hunter since her eyes let her track motion under the water. It’s how she met Church since she mistook him for a really big fish but instead pulled out a really cranky eel. 

She keeps him around for entertainment (and maybe because he’s cute. Sue her). Likes to surprise fish Church out of the water and take him on flights around the coast. Has taken him into the actual mainland city once or twice (It was not a date!... this time). 

Church

Eel: long thin tail that shimmers blue like the ocean. Fast motherfucker. Can’t hunt for shit though, always over/underestimating his shots. Sharp teeth often curled up in a growl. Technically considered a deep dweller and will bite you in the face if you call him a 'mer'.

He spends most of his time hanging out in small caves/crevices, but can be lured out through a wide range of means (including but not limited to blackmail, bribes, “Tex will be there”, making him think it’s his idea, or doubting his hunting skills).

“Hates” when Tex picks him out of the water for a fly around the coast. Is surprisingly good at bartering on the mainland for the most random shit, it’s scary impressive. 

Tucker

Anglerfish: is covered in rough scales ranging from sandy yellow to rock gray. Also has barnacles growing on parts of his tail and the base of his back fins (it helps camouflage him better). Instead of the single glowing bait a typical anglerfish has, Tucker is the bait, with glowing marks that can mimic a wide range of animals. Easier to see in the dark, but still visible during the day. Also considered a deep dweller, but doesn't care if you call him a 'mer'.

His tail is meant for speed and strength, very lean and angular so he can cut through the water (had to give up some speed when he added barnacles to his body). Back fins are jagged and can stretch like a cat with its hairs on end. Uses a lot of energy to swim so he can often be found lounging in the sun to recharge.

His eyes are bright aqua and reflective, shining back any light that comes into them. It freaks some people out (many people think it's cool too). Also has claws that blend into the pitch black of his arms, where the scales are much tougher. Sharp teeth.

Junior

Anglerfish: similar looking to Tucker, but y’know, still a baby with softer scales and dull claws. Practically attached to Tucker for the first few years after he was born, but will now willingly attach to any of the reds and blues (Church and Grif are usually on baby duty since they are the least likely to do something dangerous/leave the safety of the cave. Junior really likes going swimming with Caboose since he can piggyback ride and Caboose goes really fast. Simmons has no idea what to do with a child. Donut dotes on him like a wine aunt. Sarge’s first response to meeting Junior was to toss him up into the air to see if he could fly. He is no longer allowed to hold Junior.)

Caboose

Whale Shark: Big. Like, stupid big. Don’t ask to meet his family because it is all females and they are all much bigger than Caboose. Blue tail and fins with fun spots and patterns in white. 

Has to eat either very small cut food or a shit ton of plankton. Likes helping in hunts even though he’s not very good at it and doesn’t eat fish. Usually. 

Would hang out on the surface more, but he's a bit too big to fit comfortably, so he either has to pop up a bit further from shore or be very, very careful not to run into anything.

Grif

Nurse shark: long, thick gold-orange tail and fins. Surprisingly quick for his size, but prefers the old ‘sit and wait for someone to come by’ method of hunting. Can be found chilling in a cave in the depths with Simmons, often trying to convince Simmons to come take a nap with him or to go get him food since he doesn’t like hunting. 

Has the many rows of sharp teeth sharps typically have, but they are smaller and not quite as scary as Tucker’s rows of teeth. Also not the most ferocious of fish, which is disappointing to Sarge who thought having a shark on his team would give him an advantage. Unfortunately for him, Grif is a rather docile shark that eats small animals, not the big, violent stereotype land and sky dwellers like to associate with him.

If not chilling in the depths with Simmons, he’s watching Sarge trying to teach the reds how to fly from a warm spot under the water (Sarge couldn’t get him to pop out of the water if his life depended on it). 

Simmons

Betta fish: bright red scales and flowy, cloth-like fins that are surprisingly durable. Able to handle low oxygen levels and versatile environments, so he’s able to hang out in the depths with Grif. 

Still territorial as most betta fish are, but less of a you come into my territory and I’ll rip you apart way and more of a if you ever separate me from my pod I will make it everyone’s problem way.

Prefers the depths to the surface, often stowed away with Grif for extended periods of time. Which is a shame given how much Simmons would love to research land and sky dwellers. Alas, he will have to make do with the books he collects in a little cove far away from any mer who may wish to bother him.

Donut

Betta Fish: similar to Simmons but pink and with bigger fins. Actually enjoys the surface but likes hanging with his friends in the depths too. 

Not territorial unless his friends are put in danger. Friends with basically anyone he comes across and personally knows a lot of Wash’s flock. Likes to chill on rocks by the coast so he can talk to others mer/avians. 

Sarge

Red-billed Seagull: white—i mean red wings with black lining the edges (totally not dyed or something, what? What gave you that idea?). Feathers are a little janked up and several are always missing (he’s trying to get these good for nothing fish to fly by giving them his feathers, goddamnit). Not the best flier around.

Has bird-like feet: a classic three toed birdie with red protective bone wrapping up to his thighs. His legs are slightly thinner than the rest of his body, but otherwise just look like weird looking legs.

Can squawk like nobody's business. Please do not ask him to squawk if you want to keep your ears.

Lopez

Crab: he is a spanish speaking crab. Just, a whole ass crab.

He talks a lot of shit for someone without opposable thumbs

[heartludwig]

(soft marketable baby versions of) Sam & Max eat a sandwich.

[tomfowlery]

Big fan of Purcell suddenly turning on Sam's Gnarly Dog Mode out of nowhere.

[aimedis]

david & angel headcanons 🐺👼

"oh angel.. my angel..."

david and angel are always touching each other's hands. especially angel who uses them to fidget when they're struggling to focus

angel doesn't usually call david "david" unless they're angry

david doesn't call angel by their name either

angel loves playing with david's hair

their song is perfect by ed sheeran (duhh)

angel likes to straddle david, like sitting on his hips with their hands on his chest and david likes it too

angel stands on their tippie toes to kiss david on the forehead and david thinks it’s endearing as shit

david loves resting his head on angel's chest almost as much as he loves their head on his

angel is the second oldest of five siblings and they all love david

angel's parents love david even more. they gave him the paternal relationship that he's been missing since his dad died even though he can't really tell them everything about him

angel used to have an eat1ng dis0rder. they are recovered but they sometimes still struggle with eating. david is always there to help him (rubbing their back, feeding them, encouraging them, distracting them etc.)

angel paints their nails often and david always picks the colour. he's very particular about it as well, making sure they don't use the same colour as last time and that the colour compliments their skin tone

they cut each other's hair at home

angel gets the biggest smile on their face whenever david introduces them as his mate

they are both ticklish so they chase each other around the house tickling each other (david uses it to get angel out of bed, angel uses it because they think they're hilarious)

angel is hands down the funniest person david knows

david never sleeps well if angel is away from home. if they haven't called him before bed, he doesn't sleep at all

angel is highkey obsessed with david. they always look for him in a crowd, they're always texting him, always talking or thinking about him

angel sing-songs "daveyyyy" whenever he's working or cooking and they're coming to bother him

david is lowkey obsessed with angel. he's also always talking to or about them, thinking about them, and spinning his wedding band around his finger when he misses them

whenever angel needs reassurance, david would always give it to them with the softest voice ever heard from him

david's love language is gift giving (and physical touch) and angel expects a new trinket or something from him at least three times a month

angel's love language is physical touch (and words of affirmation) and they just always know when he needs a pick-me-up cuddle or pep talk

angel writes david mini-love letters every few days and slip them in his jacket pocket

david introduced angel to his dad's grave after their one year anniversary. they both cried a lot

angel is such a crybaby when it comes to david being nice to them

when they argue, it's used to always be about david being unnecessarily rude and angel being invasive

now, they can argue about literally anything if they're heated enough

angel starts acting like david when they're fighting or just angry in general and two davids having an argument doesn't usually end well

their arguments end up as screaming matches more often than not but they don't really say things they don't mean anymore

they make up as soon as there's the slightest silence

"what are we arguing about again?" "i don't remember. want ice cream?"

the serious arguments aren't usually screaming battles, they do generally speak to each other calmly and respectfully when they're genuinely concerned about an issue

they have never slept separately (one in the bed, one on the couch) even when they're angry at each other

they don't go to sleep angry (at each other or otherwise)

angel got david flowers first in the relationship (they get each other flowers but david does it more)

angel has every single flower david has gotten them dried in a several scrapbooks

angel used to be simultaneously worried about being too much to handle and not enough for anyone in their life. the feeling eventually faded because they see the way david looked and continues to look at them

david thrives off of knowing how flustered he makes angel with no effort (he looks into their eyes for a second too long and their face flushes/they smile nervously and turn away)

angel does like working out with david a lot of the time though they have a lower endurance than david does so he helps them through their sets (david is their number one supporter)

david can tell when angel is in a bad mood within seconds, he can just feel it

during the solstice is one of the rare moments where angel will cook for david (they just spend the whole day taking care of him and cuddling him)

david covers angel’s face for them when they yawn in public. he also does it when they make questionable faces or if they start crying around other people, he’ll cover their face for them. (he does it so often that angel doesn’t think to do those things on their own anymore when david’s not around)

david never hesitates to pull angel closer whenever they flinch even a little

david always needing to slap angel’s ass before either of them leave to go anywhere (he slaps it hella hard if they’re caught off guard and taps it if they’re just moving to another room)

angel acts overly sweet and cringy to david on purpose in public to embarrass/annoy him (david does it to them in private so they feel how embarrassing it is) 

-angel holds and tugs onto david’s sleeves absentmindedly a lot (not for his attention most of the time just because they’re comfortable) 

whenever david says something “girly” or “online terminology”, angel always says “someone cooked here 🤨”. (it was them, they cooked here)

angel shaves david's face for him when they have a little extra time in the morning

david shaves whatever part of angel's body they usually shave as well

they love waking up at the same time in the morning because getting ready together is the best part of their day

they love showering together, not even sexually they just like being close to each other at all times

david often says "love you too" without the "i" just to piss angel off

david squeezes angel's cheeks all the time

angel thinks a jealous david is the funniest thing in the world because he's literally just sulking in a corner

david thinks a jealous angel is sexy because he thinks they're hot when they're mad

angel gets more jealous than david but only slightly. they know their man is hot and they see the looks his gets

they have resorted to straight up making out with him in public just to stake their claim. david is a freak and enjoys it

david sees angel talking to someone that's not him and he starts pouting (glaring). angel teases him about it all the time and he just grumbles into their neck

angel used to be a (contemporary) dancer and they do dramatically exaggerative revamps of their old routines in front of david to be funny (he laughs every time)

angel flexes being a shaw all the time, david flexes just being married

whenever angel is unable to play their favourite games for whatever reason, david will play it for them

they both spend an egregious amount of money on each other (especially with their wedding gifts to each other)

david never lets angel pay for anything if it's not a gift for him (angel hasn't touched a bill in five years)

angel gives their little siblings a lot of money all the time and when asked why, they say "i have a husband, i don't need it"

[funni-bunny-thing]

i just realized i never drew them in wedding clothes since i joined the fandom.

(i am i even a real sam and max fan/j)

alt versions + references under the cut

[mtsodie]

he ripped those straight outta the ground

[meowdyjac]

Grumpy doodles of the cartoon animals

[agentark]

everything we know about Red vs Blue means that there's a canonically supported reality in which every bit of the rvb timeline that happens post-Freelancer saga is actually just simulations Epsilon is running in WASH's head as he unravels

[humijpg]

Really loved the atmosphere from a particular episode,,,

[tv-clown]

[coquettecowboy]

can you draw Dee Dee, bubbles (ppg), numbuh 3 aka Kuki, and Ami onuki having a picnic party

I don’t normally take requests often but this was fun! They seem like they’d all be good friends! @pencilholdersilly

[cute-brainz]

freelancer + gavin

[hansoeii]

I'll be reworking my commission sheet some time soon and then I'll open commissions again at the end of the month! ✨️

Thought I'd give you guys a head's up in case you'd like to work with me! I love working on comms and I can't wait to get back to it! ❤️

If you have any questions, feel free to leave them in my inbox or DM me!

[essbi24]

headcanon of the day

freelancer frequently worries about their career. more specifically, they worry about the fact that they don’t really seem to have any ambition when it comes to a career. they’re a human born, so they were brought up with an entirely different view on life. when they realized and accepted that they had magic, all their previous plans for their life dissipated completely. but even before, they never gave it much thought—they were never quite passionate about anything. and then their powers came along, and eventually, they were so passionate about it. their life was given a whole new meaning; one that they adored. their newfound focus on this path took away from any attention given to a career, but now… it’s an increasing source of anxiety. they find themselves constantly comparing their lives to their friends. damien knows exactly what he wants to do—-he always has, and he’s always gotten it. freelancer was so proud of him once he announced his new position, but a sick feeling of envy and apprehension took over them as well. and it’s the same situation with huxley and dear, too. they’re both incredibly talented and driven, knowing what they want in a career and always striving to get it. gavin can’t relate to them either...though he may have a shared experience of not having career plans at one point in time, he’s now diligent and focused in his studies and plans. he talks more and more about what he wants to do in the future, and freelancer is there, encouraging him and cheering him on. but still, there’s this nagging, inescapable feeling of inferiority brewing inside them whenever he brings it up. if anyone could relate to them, it would’ve been lasko. he wasn’t used to this life, hadn’t grown up knowing about this magical world and planning his life with it all in mind, like the others. but they had met him as a counselor, and he only seemed to grow in his job at d.a.m.n, constantly reforming and achieving promotion after promotion. freelancer just feels so guilty—they know it’s pathetic, but they can’t help it. the insecurity and self-doubt derived from their apathy is utterly consuming. so they continue to attend their monotonous jobs, changing them constantly, and searching for aspiration..all in vain.

[latenightsundayblues]

Give it up for adam faulkner everybody

He's been saving up money for the last two weeks so he could finally buy a cup of name-brand coffee that actually tastes good. It was supposed to be his lunch

[fadeintoyou1993]

hii things are rough and im short on money to afford some of my medication and pay my bills this month and im taking commissions if youd like to support me 💓 and if not boosting is always appreciated too 🥹 if you dont know me im an autistic black & native brazilian dyke that p much gets most of my income from commissions online bc finding accessible jobs where i live is really difficult. this is a theme i posted this week, this is an icon pack i made. also, check out my resource blog for more of the things i make (@userbru) 🩷 this is my ko-fi & this is my paypal.me. if you dont wanna commission anything but would still like to help, literally any amount is appreciated 💘 thank u sm

$44/300