#frappe feeling sick again

[frappes-random-reblogs]

Yesterday I described what I feel like to my sibling, I just always feel like I'm tired and shit and yadda yadda more stuff

Sibling just said I'm depressed

Which is. No. Why would I be. I can feel emotion. I think I'm just so braindead like wtf

[littlemisssquiggles]

I had a little reassuring thought. What if Lakia lets Hanto borrow the Vrastumgear if he becomes too sickly to use the Valenbuster?

Hiya Pine. Once again, not a bad theory m’fam and just like last time, you may potentially be on the money. But allow this squiggly Gavvian to take your reassuring thought and raise you a curious one of mine.

What if … in an odd twist of events, Nyelv Stomach decides to actually help Hanto and gifts him the second Vramstumgear and Frappe Gochizo as a metaphorical middle figure to the Sugar Doctor as a sign of the end of their alliance?

Remember how I said that I’m not sure whether Nyelv knows about Suga’s secret underground bakery of Bitt-Brats?

While it still needs to be affirmed in the show, it wouldn’t surprise me at all if, after everything Nyelv has done to assist him, Suga just screws the Granute Witchdoctor over and keeps his Bitt-Brat bakery and his plans to turn himself into a Kamen Rider through Hanto a secret from him; which in turn, pisses Nyelv off.

Perhaps Nyelv is the type of science nerd who doesn’t like it when his “fellow science buddies” keep findings from him especially after his shared knowledge assisted said science buddy in their own scientific ventures. Given his character, Nyelv strikes me as the type to not liked to be used by people, regardless of their shared interests.

So if his little human protegee lied to him, let alone used him in his own scientific pursuits without his knowledge, that’s bound to strike a nerve to Nyelv’s ego.

So I’m thinking after Hanto succumbs to the negative effects of the Chocold, Suga is going to take him hostage. I still feel like Suga is going to harvest the Granute gland he gave Hanto and use it to turn him into Kamen Rider Bake. Or at least try to and probably fail? Hanto looks pretty disheveled in the scans of his Frappe form reveal. Not only that, but to me he looks skinnier than usual - almost like he’d been held hostage against his will for a period of time. So … perhaps Suga will take Hanto hostage and it would actually be Nyelv that comes to his rescue of all people?

I don’t want to knock your theory of Lakia loaning Hanto the Vrastumgear cause it would actually be pretty nice if Lakia is the one to come to Hanto’s aid after Suga abducts him. After all, if Hanto disappeared and Shouma becomes worried for him, I can picture Lakia feeling a sense of guilt since he knew about the Suga Doctor working with Nyelv and didn’t tell either Hanto or even Shouma. (Then again, to be fair, Lakia doesn’t know about Shouma and Hanto’s ties to Suga either).

So if Hanto is captured, I can definitely peg Lakia figuring out that Suga is the culprit and going to save Hanto given the fact that Shouma is still too sick.

Even if he can utilize his Blizzard Sorbet / Caking forms, since both forms drain him drastically, I doubt Shouma will be able to face off against the arrival of another new Bitt-Brat AND go to Hanto’s aid at the same time.

So I figured this is a chance for Lakia to help Hanto on Shouma’s behalf.

So you could be right about Lakia helping Hanto. I’m just not sure about him loaning him his Vratsumgear since, to me, the Frappe Gochizo looks like it was practically MADE for Hanto.

The fact that it literally has a Rider signia that looks like Valen’s helmet on it tells me that this Gochizo was designed specifically to be used by Kamen Rider Valen.

So how else would Hanto get his hands on a Gochizo that was made for him if Nyelv Stomach wasn’t involved somehow?

Therefore, my theory is that Hanto got the Frappe Gochizo and the second Vratsumgear from Nyelv who’ll probably do it to spite Suga since Hanto was his personal “lab rat”.

That’s my main hunch about that for now.

Either Frappe Gochizo was artifically made for Kamen Rider Valen by Nyelv Stomach or … in another surprised twist, Frappe was made by Shouma who recovers from his illness after him and Hanto reconcile finally and Frappe is symbolic of Shouma and Hanto’s repaired friendship.

So basically Frappe Form is symbolic of Hanto getting over his insecurities and choosing to trust in his friends rather than work alone.

So Frappe Form is basically Kamen Rider Valen plus the power of friendship cause it’s Hanto using powers he gained from his fellow riders - the borrowed Vrastumgear from Lakia and the Frappe Gochizo that Shouma made and give to him.

Chocold represented Hanto’s lonliness and his belief in only himself to stop the Granutes on his own while Frappe is the power Hanto gains from his friends/fellow Riders who are both Granutes.

That’s another possibility too. What do you think?

~LMS (2025)

[fenimores-book-nook]

Well, hello again :)

3/27/25 ~ Thursday

Hello and good-whatever time it is that you're reading this! Welcome back to the Book Nook! It has been Some Time...once again. But that's okay! The blog writing mood hasn't been hitting me very much. It is right now, so yippee!

I think part of the problem is I'd go to start a blog post and lose traction after the first couple sentences, having not a clue of what my blog should consist of. But it's been home to many random things, so why stop now? So, prepare yourself, dear reader, this will be filled with random topics! (Most of them probably won't have anything to do with each other, but that's what makes it fun!)

SO, first things first, thank you for joining yet another fun Book Nook adventure; I'm glad you're here. <3 Second, getting right into it- THE NEWEST HUNGER GAMES BOOK IS SO CRAZY!!! I don't want to spoil anything because maybe you wanna read it, but just gonna say two things: Sunrise On the Reaping is the most heartbreaking book I have ever read. But it is so amazing and I 10000% recommend.

Also, context on my cover photo I decided to use-yes, I found it on Pinterest yet again-it's the vibe I've been feeling lately. It's been so lovely outside the past few days and my journal has gotten lots of writing time outside during them. :) Though, I'm not writing outside right now, butttt I AM at one of my favorite coffee shops at my art group I meet up with every now and then. YES! Writing is an art. Obviously. Anyways...wait, before I move on from the coffee shop; my drink I got is very good and I need to tell you all about it. It's a raspberry bean-freeze, which is basically a frappe but better. It's been a go-to drink for me here for a while, it's great.

Moving on! If you've read any of my past posts, you know I love my book updates. SOOOO BOOKKKKKK UPDAAAAATEEEEE!!!!

The main books I'm reading/rereading right now:

Aahhahahahahaha, YES. AGAIN. It's a comfort book for me, okay?!?! But hey, I used a different photo this time. (This is a collage I found on Pinterest.) I'm not too-too into it right now but I'm a decent ways in. But let's go back to it being a comfort book for me, okay? I wanna talk about it. Because anyone who has watched and/or read this beautiful story would hear that and probably be confused and slightly concerned for my well being. Yes, it's a sad book and yeah, sometimes when I reread it I stop at the part where (SPOILER, but also this book has been out for 13 years, so..) Augustus starts getting more sick because I don't want to feel more sad at that moment. BUT! It's still a comfort book for me and will always be one of my favorites.

Just recently, I started making a list of things that make me love it so much, so I'll just share those.

It makes me think of cozy, cloudy days. Clouds that feel like they're gonna cry on you any time but it isn't sad. It feels fresh and smells like rain in the air.

It feels like a cozy blanket or a hot cup of coffee or tea on a cloudy day, but the perfect kind of cloudy day.

It has phrases like, "celebration maximization" and "existentially fraught free throws" in it.

That's all I have on the list currently, but don't worry, it will grow. I don't know if my explanation for why The Fault in Our Stars is one of my comfort reads will ever fully make sense, but hey, it's fine. It makes sense to me and that's all that matters.

Also something along the same lines that I realized fairly recently: drawing sad things when I feel sad helps me to feel validated in those feelings. And so, I don't think reading sad books when I'm sad is much different than that. Not that I only ever read this book when I'm sad; as I've repeatedly stated, it's a comfort read, so I read it when I want some comfort too. But also because I love it so much and I like to revisit my Stars-friends. I'm getting off track. WHAT I MEAN TO SAY, is even if I don't feel overall sad but I'm still rereading it, it makes me feel validated in what I do feel. Even if the sad feelings aren't inherently sad or they're smaller than other times.

Another thing that adds to it-no, I'm not done-is I just really love how John Green writes. Especially in this book with these characters. Like, it's not really a cancer book but it's kind of a cancer book and when you hear "cancer book," you think of it being all serious but this is not that. He just puts a spin on LITERATURE that is just so amazing to me. It speaks to my soul. Ah, good ol' John.

So, got a little deep there. You might be even more confused but I needed to get those thoughts out there, so there. I just really love this book, okay? Okay. (that was a reference, teehee)

NEXT BOOK!!!

This one is also a reread, I'm not sure if I've talked about it on one of my posts, but I'm talking about it now! The main reason why I'm rereading this one is because lately I've been rethinking what labels actually fit me. Oh yeah; I dropped my labels a while back-don't know if I said that-because it felt overwhelming and my relationship with them wasn't the healthiest. It honestly really helped and I felt less pressured to be something I was claiming to be but didn't even know what that something looked like. Really, it was me putting unnecessary pressure on myself to check every single box of the "cliches." (Which is dumb, don't do that to yourself.) Labels for your sexuality or romantic orientation and etc, are supposed to help you. You make your label your own. <3

So all of that said, those questioning thoughts came up recently and I wanted to approach it in a healthier way than what I would have in the past. I remembered that when I was using the label Aromantic Asexual, I really enjoyed reading this book so I thought I'd refresh myself on it again. Honestly, it's been validating! So yay!

NEXT BOOK!!

Actually not a reread! This one I haven't been reading super frequently, but I am pretty determined to READ it. I read the first one-this is the second one in the series-From Blood and Ash, and I absolutely loved it and was dying for a week when I didn't read the second one. My library didn't have a physical copy of it, but then I bought a copy at Barnes and Noble and was very thrilled when I found it. ;)

I've been really liking this one so far, though it's taking me a bit longer to get into but that may be because I just finished Sunrise on the Reaping which was a very intense read at times-most times-so I might just need a break from more high-stakes stories for a bit. (Hence, all the rereads.) Don't get me wrong, the story line is AMAZING. The first book was so good, I mean hey, it was amazing enough to get me to buy the second one. It also was the first fantasy that I've read in a while that made me gasp that much from all those twists and turns and surprises. SO GOOD. AHCK! I'm flipping out just remembering how amazing it is. So, I am very excited to get more into the second one.

From what I know, there's 5 books out in the series right now, plus an extra one that I think is probably a side story from one of the earlier books. AND, this summer there's another one coming out, so whoop whoop! We'll see if I stick with the whole series, but it indeed is promising.

ALL RIGHT THAT'S ALL THE BOOK UPDAAAAATES :)

I love when the blog post turns into a post focused on books. It's great. That's probably it for this post. Probably.

Unless I find another thing to write about...

Hmm.

I just started this new TV series called The Wolf King, like, last night and I'm already hooked. I saw the preview of it and knew it was a show I could get into. It's pretty dang good so far! I also really like the animation of it, it just feels more hand drawn and the shading and brush strokes are just really nice. It itches my brain just the right way, if you know what I mean. ;)

So to recap: I am yet again, rereading The Fault in Our Stars. There's lots of good books out there to read. And animated shows are so cool.

Thank you for joining me on today's crazy Book Nook adventure! Don't forget, you're awesome. :)

Until the next one,

Thalia <3

[sushiriki]

 [ stay, stay, stay — pjs ]

-> pairings: best friend! jay x fem! reader

-> warnings: a little bantering, fluff!

-> word count: 3k!

-> synopsis: after being mistreated time and time again, you’ve had enough. you swore to your best friend, jay, that you wouldn’t date anybody if you could help it. obviously falling for jay wasn’t part of your plan.

-> this is part of my one shot series, enhypen as taylor swift songs! view the masterlist here :)

“so then i stormed out! what else should i have done?” you exasperatedly recollect your memory from the past twenty-four hours to your childhood best friend, jay, who sits in front of you sipping his frappuccino.

“let me get this straight,” he starts, setting his half-melted drink down after taking a huge sip out of it. “you went to your boyfriend’s job during his shift to surprise him but found him in the middle of a make out session with his coworker in the back room when you went to look for him? and now you’ve broken up with him?” 

you press your lips into a tight line and nod. “exactly, right to the t. way to sum it up.”

jay looks at you quizzically and raises his eyebrows, leaning into the wooden back of his chair. he silently stares at you for a couple seconds before bursting out into rambunctious laughter. “finally! how many times did i tell you that he was a douchebag?”

rolling your eyes with a huff, you raise your legs and place your feet onto jay’s open lap from under the table. “way too many times to count.” you murmur, ducking your head down and glaring at the visibly amused man across from you through your eyelashes. after the initial shock of the encounter that left you with runny mascara and puffy under-eyes, you finally got the swelling to go down in time for your cafe run.

“and who didn’t listen?” jay singsongs, leaning forward once again to take a drink from his frappe before it melted down even more. 

“me, okay! are you happy?” he chuckles and nods his head, eyes filling with a lighthearted mirth.

“i very much am, you have no clue.”

taking a drink from the tall glass of pink lemonade that was placed onto a well-made, decorative little twine coaster in front of you, you let jay ramble on with his speech.

“it’s like you’re a red flag magnet, almost every single guy you’ve ever dated either cheated on you or broke up with you.” he pauses and suddenly acts as if an epiphany of epic proportions hit him. “maybe you’re the problem.”

“hey!” you yell, hearing a thud as the soles of your shoes come in contact with the wooden floor once again. you reach over and swat him on the shoulder as he lets out another large laugh, one that resonates across the cafe and in your chest. 

“i am not the problem. i’ve just been unlucky in love, that’s all.”

jay snorts as he downs the last bits of his drink. “sure, that’s totally it.”

narrowing your eyes at him, you continue. “and because of that, i’m sick of it. i’m sick of falling in love! i’m swearing off boys.”

“you’re swearing off boys? what are we, middle schoolers?” the brunet says, laughing at your expression a little more.

“yes, i am! it’s a good thing to be single you know, it’s very freeing.” you counter, sipping at your lemonade harshly through the paper straw provided by the cafe. you hated when they gave out paper straws, the feeling of little bits of it breaking off and going into your mouth always irked you, making you prefer no straw at all.

“okay, fine. you’ve sworn off boys.” jay waves over the person working at the counter of the small cafe you both were in and asks for the bill. “at least neither of us will have to deal with any of your annoying boyfriends.”

“ow!” it’s safe to say that he definitely received another smack on the shoulder because of that comment.

the loud, incessant knocking on the door to your apartment was one annoying but sure way to wake you up out of your nap. groggily throwing the pillowy comforter off of your pajama-clad body, you begrudgingly make your way to your front door. swinging it open, you are met with the impatient face of your best friend.

“where have you been? we were supposed to meet an hour ago to go eat!” jay says, pushing past you and making his way into your living room, stopping by your plush couch and flopping right on top of it. 

rolling your eyes at how comfortable jay was in your home, you take a glance at the clock that was mounted on the wall above your dining table and see that you were indeed an hour late. “sorry,” you say sheepishly, stretching your arms above your head and covering your mouth mid-yawn. “i must’ve slept through my alarm.”

“clearly.” you try to give him a disapproving look, but doing that in the middle of rubbing your right eye didn’t deliver it in the intimidating way you wanted it to. “never mind that, go hop into the shower. i’ll go through your closet and find you something to wear, we both know i have better style than you anyway.”

“i hate you.” you grumble under your breath as you drag your feet on the way to your bathroom, taking the time to grab a pillow from the edge of your couch and chucking it at his grinning figure. 

“you wish you did.”

after taking a quick shower, you head into your bedroom to see a sleek yet simple outfit placed onto your bed. smiling to yourself, you can’t help but agree with jay: he did dress much better than you. no matter how much he got on your nerves at times, you had to agree that he was a living, breathing pinterest board. you pull on the outfit laid out for you and stand in front of the full-length mirror in your room, fixing the clothing across your body correctly and genuinely admiring how you look.

“you look pretty.” a voice calls out from the entrance to your bedroom and you jump a little in surprise.

“you scared me!” you exclaim, heading over to your vanity to grab your blush compact. staring into the mirror once again, you carefully apply the rouge on the apples of your cheeks before looking at the leather-jacket wearing man leaning on your doorframe and catching him staring.

“what are you looking at?”

he moves from the door and walks over to you, stopping right behind you in the mirror. “i said you looked pretty, remember?”

“oh,” you feel your cheeks flush, completely eradicating the purpose of the makeup you were applying. “thank you, you don’t look half bad either.”

“thank you too.” jay smiles at you, something that you vividly catch in the reflection.

nodding at him and going back to applying the rest of your makeup routine, he checks his watch just as you spray your perfume on. 

“come on! we’ll be late, i made a reservation at that restaurant you like.” 

in your rush to pack your bag and to double-check your appearance in the mirror, you fail to notice the small smile that graces jay’s face as he observes your frantic, but endearing, self.

“you’re lucky i know you well enough to expect that you were going to be late. i made the reservation an hour later than the time i told you on the phone.” 

from dinner and lunch dates to shopping together to going to amusement parks whenever you could, you spent a lot more time with jay. your recent lack of relationship status made you hang out with your childhood best friend a lot more often, something that you realized you greatly missed since you both started getting busier with work and other relationships. relationships on your part, that is. as handsome as jay was, he never got into a relationship. for as long as you knew him, he didn’t date any girl. sure, he expressed his interest in a couple girls over the years, but he never actually went and asked them out on a date or to be his girlfriend. it was as if he did like them but he didn’t like them enough to pursue them.

“why haven’t you dated anyone so far?” you ask him as you both start walking into the same cafe you told him you had broken up with your cheating ex all those weeks ago. you two had come from the bowling alley down the street and just finished playing a match in which jay beat you by a landslide. you insisted on coming to the cafe because you wanted to drink your favorite glass of lemonade to quench your thirst as a result of sorely losing.

“what? why the sudden question?” he confusedly asks, a wrinkle suddenly appearing between his brows.

you line up at the counter, eyes scanning over the menu even though you already know exactly what you’re going to order. it is the same thing every single time you frequent that cafe. “no reason, i just realized that you never dated anybody ever since we were kids.”

falling into step next to you, you both patiently wait for your turn to order your drinks and maybe a pastry or two. “i guess i just never was that interested in anyone? i don’t know.” he replies in a small voice, crossing his arms and tapping his bicep to a rhythm. just as you hesitatingly accept his response, the person in front of you finishes paying and jay steps forward to order for the both of you.

“one coffee and one pink lemonade, please.”

when the barista successfully takes your orders and turns around to make them, you make your way over to your usual seat in the establishment and call out to jay. “i’ll go sit, okay?” 

jay nods at you and waits by the counter so he can take your drinks to your round table for two by the window. you chose this spot specifically so that you and jay could continuously play the game you both adapted when you were kids. you two would sit in one area and watch the people as they walked by, creating and narrating the stories you thought they had just by a brief look at them as they passed. two little children were just a speck in these unsuspecting strangers’ busy lives, but the people they watched go by helped make the best memories and inside jokes as they grew older. 

taking a seat and setting your bag down, something dawns on you. you had never told jay your order, but how did he get it right?

pondering over this realization, you don’t notice somebody slip into the seat across you. “are you thinking about something? that’s dangerous, especially for you.” he teases, handing you the cold, round glass that the cafe always puts their lemonade in. 

“nothing,” you say, opening your mouth to take a sip but abruptly stop when you realize that your lips were closing around nothing. 

“what, no straw?”

jay snickers and tries to warm his hands using his coffee cup. “i know how much you hate when the paper straw comes apart, you complain about it so much that it’s hard to miss.”

you stare at him with wide eyes, your confusion growing by the minute. since when did he start actually paying attention to the random things you tell him? 

he looks at you with a raised eyebrow, taking another swig from his hot coffee. after you continue staring at him, he stares back and blinks slowly, tilting his head a little to the left. his bangs fall over his eyes in a way that leaves you breathless, making you want to reach over and brush them out of his face so you can see him better. your hand twitches but it stays put.

has he always been this handsome? you ask yourself, licking your lips. your heart was about to beat right out of your chest due to his stare, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look away.

“hello? earth to you? are you okay? you’ve been acting weird lately, all stare-y and stuff.” jay says, setting his coffee down on the table.

you snap out of your daze and look down, hiding your reddened cheeks under the guise of drinking your lemonade. “i’m fine, sorry. i just started thinking about something.”

“about what? you’ve been doing that a lot recently too, spacing out.”

you inwardly panic, trying to find a topic to use as a cover-up for your real thoughts. “i’ve been trying to reorganize my kitchen and i was just thinking about how i should redecorate.”

“your kitchen,” he says carefully, as if he’s testing out the sentence in his mouth. “redecorating your kitchen.”

“yes, what else could it be?” you rush out, taking another long sip out of your drink.

scrunching his forehead in incredulousness, jay shakes his head a little and looks out the window, exposing his faint heart-shaped birthmark that you’ve found yourself looking at a little more in the past few times you’ve hung out. “tell me if you need any help with it, yeah?”

you nod absentmindedly, finding yourself staring at him instead of the outside world that you loved to poke fun at together. 

“okay.”

after you had gathered together your wits and started acting like your normal self, you and jay pick up your people watching game, playing it until both of your drinks had disappeared. noticing you finish up the last of your drink, jay waves the cashier over again to pay for your drinks.

“let’s walk home after this,” he says, pulling out a couple bills of cash and placing them into the clay tray the cafe provided so you could place your payment somewhere before handing it to them. “i want to watch a movie.”

nodding, you pack your things and start to get up. following after you, he quietly thanks the staff that attended to you before ducking out of the exit, a mellifluous wind chime echoing through the air. 

the walk home is comfortably silent, with the only sounds you hear being the fallen autumn leaves crunching underneath your feet with every step you take and the faint gust of wind enveloping your figures. jay shoves his hands into his pockets and you wrap your arms around yourself, trying to fend off the early fall chill. noticing this, he takes a hand out of his pocket and wraps an arm around you, immediately providing you with the warmth you needed.

“thank you.” you say gratefully, pressing into his side more.

“it’s no problem,” he replies, rubbing your upper arm in hopes to warm you up a little bit more. 

“you asked me a question earlier, right?”

you look up at him with a tilted gaze, trying to recollect what you had asked him earlier in the day. “hm?”

“why i haven’t dated anybody at all.” he says with finality, suddenly taking a deep breath in.

“ah,” you breathe out. “that question. what about it?” 

approaching the final stretch of road before you arrive at your house, jay realizes that he has to get what he wants to say out now or else he wouldn’t be able to admit it once you both step foot into your home.

“the truth is, i was—am—interested in somebody. that’s why i never asked anyone else out.” he admits, keeping his arm tightly wrapped around your torso.

“oh? why didn’t you ever act on it?” you prod, now invested in his answer and his story.

he sighs deeply. “i never really thought she was interested? she never showed it anyway.” your mouth forms an ‘o’ as you turn your head away, accepting his answer.

“who?” you utter, your heart starting to race as you try and ready yourself to hear his response.

“well, you.”

stopping dead in your tracks, jay’s arm slips from around you and he ends up a couple feet down the road. you part your lips in shock and you start to wring your hands together. you were confused, why didn’t he ever say anything? why did i not notice?

“what?” he now looks at you worriedly. “me?”

the man you’ve known ever since you were toddlers laughs to himself a little bit. “yes, you. ever since the junior year of high school, i think.” he shakes his head at your surprised expression and turns his body to face you completely, shoving his hands back in his pockets.

bringing your hands up to your mouth, you gasp. “was i that blind?”

he lets out a laugh, a loud one this time. you hear it reverberate all around you and through your heart like you did once before; it means something different this time. “a little, yeah. but i didn’t mind it, it was easier that way.”

“why didn’t you tell me? because i didn’t seem interested?” you look him straight in the eyes and he stares back just as intently, as if he was looking right through you.

“kinda? i guess. i didn’t want the chance of ruining our friendship just because i have a crush on you, i’d rather have you as my best friend than not have you at all.”

“have? present tense?” he lowers his head slightly in confirmation to your statement.

you look away and nod in understanding, slowly but surely walking back up to him and pressing into his side for warmth once more. though a little awkwardly, he slides his arm back around you and guides the both of you for the rest of the walk back to your flat. the stroll resumes the silence it was in before the unexpected confession, but it somehow stays comfortable. stopping at your doorstep, you reach into the pocket of your jacket and pull out the keys to your home, pushing the metal into the lock and swinging open the front door. you start to make your way in and realize that jay is still standing outside in the cold.

“i’ll go ahead? i think that you might need some time to think about what i just dropped on you.” he laughs humorlessly before turning around to walk back to his apartment which was a couple blocks from yours. you and jay had decided to move into apartments close to each other after the both of you graduated from university so that one would never be too far from the other, just in case.

“no,” you call out, making him tersely stop and spin back around. “stay.”

“really?” jay says, looking at you with eyes full of hope.

“i think it’s best if we both stay.” you smile, opening the door wider and welcoming him in.

“does this mean you’ve stopped the whole ‘swearing boys off’ notion?” he asks.

“just get in and play the movie before i change my mind and kick you out.”

“you know, i think it’s funny when you’re mad.”

-> author’s note: here it is!!! the first installment for my series. thank you all for waiting for it even though i was inactive for a while :( i hope this might make up for the wait. thank you so much for reading ♡

-> taglist [ open ] — @astra-line @va1ry @pwark-jisvng @jaeyunistars @rrrapmonsterandsprite @uuuuhhhmiawmiaw

[arctickat2400]

Just Be Held <> Andrew Garfield

Warnings: Toxic friends, miscarriage, angst

A/N: Finally finished my first Andrew Garfield imagine. Y'all this man is such a sweetheart. I love him so much. Started this on Sunday and finished tonight (Monday night - almost midnight). I'd had notes for the present tense parts, but I didn't know what to do for the past tense part until I was laying in bed trying to sleep and I started thinking about it and I finally was like I can't just lay here and not start writing. So I got up and started writing. lol anyways, it's a bit sad. Lots of fluff as my writings always are. A bit on the longer side. Either way, hope y'all enjoy! Also found this gem ⬇️the other day and I just had to use it😍🖤☺️

* * *

“Is there something wrong?” You asked the nurse, your face contorting once you noticed an odd look on her face, staring at the monitor in front of her. You’re currently at your first monthly ultrasound with Andrew and you’re both so excited to see your baby, even if there’s not much to see yet. But you can’t help but feel just a smidge of fear now from the lack of response from the nurse.

“Um -” She started and just hardly a word from her made you nervous. Nurses aren’t supposed to say things like that. It concerns the patient. You knew because you yourself are a nurse. You wouldn’t say something like that. What was she seeing?

“I’ll be right back,” She mentioned before leaving the room. You looked up at Andrew, worried, and, as he met your eyes, he squeezed your hand in his reassuringly.

“Let’s have a look here, shall we?” Your doctor, who your nurse just went to retrieve, offered you a comforting smile, even though it didn’t help all that much. Why had she needed to find him? The same look the nurse previously had adorned your doctor’s face once he began looking around on the monitor. It made you feel sick as you saw it on the face of a higher power.

“Y/N, there’s really no easy way to say this -” You already knew it was bad, but you weren’t ready for what was coming. Tears were already slipping from your eyes. “I’m sorry, Y/N, but you’re not pregnant,” Your doctor admitted, and it felt like your whole world had come crashing down around you. Your ears started ringing, your eyes dimming around you. A false positive, of course. You’re not surprised, but it still broke you.

The drive home was mostly quiet, neither you nor Andrew had much to say after the news you’d just discovered. Andrew would keep glancing over at you as you stared out of the window at the grey sky, your legs pulled up to your chest. It wasn’t sunny, it was cloudy, a likeliness of rain in the foreseeable future. However, you wore your sunglasses to shield the pain that filled your eyes from the world. You felt a warm, comforting hand on your arm. You looked over at Andrew in the corner of your eye.

“We’ll try again, love. It’ll be okay,” Your husband told you. You offered him a slight nod of acknowledgment. He was so worried about you, especially when you hadn’t even looked at him.

That’s the thing, though - sure, you can try again; but, you’ve been trying over and over again ever since you got married almost 2 years ago. This isn’t the first time this kind of thing has happened and you highly doubted it would be the last. You couldn’t help but think back to the day you found out you were actually pregnant for the first time…

Sitting outside the cafe with your friends, you sipped on your frappe while laughing along to something Olivia had said. In reality, you weren’t really listening, your mind somewhere else, as per usual. But, you laughed anyways as to not bring any unnecessary attention to yourself. You leaned forward towards the table to take a bite of your brownie snack, but before you could, Brinley just had to say something.

“Hey, Y/N, maybe you should lay off the brownies. I think it’s starting to show,” She mentioned as you noticed both her and Olivia  glaring down towards your stomach.

You’ve never had the most supportive, nicest friends out there. They were pretty much the toxic type that you tended to attract, but couldn’t do anything about. You’ve known them for years, even before you met Andrew. They were always up to hang out and talk and such. But, you always seemed to be the odd one out in the group. You weren’t the skinniest person ever, but you weren’t the opposite either. Everyone in your small group of friends were athletic and thin. You don’t really know how you came to be friends with them, but in the beginning, you weren’t complaining. At least you had friends and people to hang out with when Andrew was working or whatever. You knew it wasn’t healthy, though, to be friends with these sort of people. But, there’s not much you can do with that. So, you decided to stick with them, no matter how much it all hurt you mentally and emotionally.

“Oh…” You trailed off, setting your snack down again. “Yeah, I guess you’re right,” You offered a fake smile, knowing the insincereness would fly right over their heads. You stood up without a second though, despite your yearning hunger that craved your snack still, and began to pile everyones dishes together to bring inside. You were always the nice one like that, doing things for others. “I’m going to bring these inside,” You didn’t say anything more as you walked inside to bring everything to the front counter. But, you never went back out to your “friends”. You walked out the back door of the cafe as to not be seen by them and you rushed home to drown in your feelings. It seemed like a common occurrence when it came to your friends. Why you haven’t just left them altogether, you had no idea.

Racing through the door of your house, you run past the living room, where Andrew just happened to be sitting while working on his laptop, and dashed up the stairs to your room.

“Y/N,” Andrew called after you, but you couldn’t really tell if it was in question or a statement. You didn’t bother to answer as you sat down on the edge of your bed, tears streaming from your eyes. Andrew soon bolted in and didn’t hesitate to rush right to your side to comfort you once he saw your distress. He knelt down beside you so he could look up at your face.

Taking your hand in his, brushing his thumb over your knuckles, “Y/N, baby, what’s happened? What’s got my baby so sad?” Andrew questioned you softly, his face covered in concern.

“I don’t even know anymore. My friends basically just told me I was fat and now I’m starting to believe it. I-I’ve been eating so much l-lately and I still don’t know why. I f-feel like everything’s falling apart and I just c-can’t…” You couldn’t go on when Andrew stood to sit next to you, taking you in his embrace. He cradled you in his arms, holding your head against his chest as he pressed his lips to the top of your head.

“Sweetheart, don’t listen to them. I knew when I first met them that they were no good for you. You deserve so much better than them. Don’t believe anything they say. For one, you are not fat at all, not even close. Even if you did have a little bit of extra weight on you, I wouldn’t care one bit because I love you so much, no matter what. Always.” Andrew admitted as your crying calmed just a little. He could feel you nod against his chest as he leant down and kissed your forehead, soothingly brushing his hand over your tummy.

“You’re feeling a bit warm there, darling. You feeling alright?” Andrew asked, his eyebrows furrowing in worry. You sniffled, rubbing your eyes with the back of your hand.

“I think so. Just a bit overwhelmed, I guess,” You answered as you slid out of his embrace, even though that was the last thing you wanted to do, and made your way towards your attached bathroom. Just then, your legs started to feel a bit weak and you began to feel nauseous. Your head was pounding and you were becoming light headed. You felt your face pale and the room became a bit too hot for your liking despite the A/C always being on a lower temperature. Andrew could see your unsteadiness as you walked. He stood and followed you, holding his hands out to you in case you were to fall, noticing the stumbling in your step.

You stopped in your tracks as spots started to compromise your eyesight, your vision beginning to tunnel. Andrew’s arms were wrapped around you, holding you in his lap, before you hit the floor, everything going black.

* * *

“I will be back to check in on her in a few. She’s hooked up to some fluids and she should regain consciousness soon. They will both be just fine.” You heard an unknown voice say. Both? You thought, confused.

“Thank you, doc,” Andrew. Doc? Were you in a hospital? What happened? All these thoughts and questions filled your mind. You attempted to move and you felt your hand in another. You moved your other hand and felt a sharp sting against the back of it. IV?

You shifted your head to look to your other side. You barely managed to open your eyes when you saw your husband sitting beside your bed, worry mixed with hope filling his eyes.

“Hey, baby girl. How’re you feeling?” Andrew inquisited, smoothing his free hand over your head, pushing some hair behind your ear.

“Fine, I think,” You managed to say below a whisper. “I’m thirsty.” Andrew didn’t say anything, just began to fill a cup with the water from the pitcher that was perched on the side table. He handed it to you, making sure you had it securely in your hand.

You’d downed the cup before laying your head back, Andrew taking the cup from you. You sat in silence for a bit, Andrew looking around at you, rubbing up and down your arm, making sure you were okay. You didn’t bother asking what had happened. You were smart enough to put two and two together. But one thing was still very much lingering on your mind.

“Andy?” You called out, your voice a little more used to talking than before. “Yes, my love?” You both managed small smiles at that.

“Why did the doctor say ‘they will both be just fine’? What did he mean?” You put emphasis on both to get your point across. At your question, you notice a particular, rare sparkle in Andrew’s eyes. He was never one to cry, at least not out of work and acting. So, when you saw the first tear slide down his cheek, you panicked.

“Andy, what’s going on? What happened?” You asked, freaking out just a bit. That was when Andrew took your hand in both of his, hiding his face them to compose himself. He, then, looked up at you with a smile that widened with each passing second. You tried calming yourself down after seeing the smile, knowing something wasn’t wrong.

“Darling, you’re pregnant,” Andrew confessed and you began to tear up yourself. You covered your mouth in shock with your other hand, keeping your eyes locked with Andrew’s, tears now streaming down your cheeks. He composed himself, wiping away the tears from his cheeks as he moved to sit beside you on the bed.

“They said you were a little too dehydrated than normal and that you had been so overwhelmed that it made not only you, but them distressed, too,” Andrew paused, placing his hand on your belly. “But, you are both okay. Everything’s going to be just fine, sweetheart.” Andrew’s smile returned as he bent down and pressed a sweet kiss to your tummy. You let out a strong, but happy cry, burying your fingers in Andrew’s hair.

“That explains so much,” You cried out, not being able to stop. Andrew let out a laugh, emitting one from you in result.

“I love you so much, Y/N,” Andrew declared, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you against his chest.

“And I love you, Andrew, so much,” You couldn’t bear to leave his arms in this moment, and neither of you had plans to move anyway.

* * *

Two Months Later

You felt a sharp pain in your lower belly, startling you from your dreamless sleep. Unsure of what it was or what it could be, you waited a minute to see if it would come back. When it didn’t, you settled back down to sleep.

Hardly two minutes later, the sharp pain made itself known again, but more painful than the last time. You shot up in bed, your hand flying to your stomach. You almost gasped at the pain.

“Y/N, is everything okay, darling?” Andrew questioned groggily, turning towards you. Once he noticed your distress, he panicked. “Baby, what’s going on? Are you okay? Is there something wrong with the baby?” He asked, moving to sit in front of you, his hands on either side of your cheeks. And, even through the pain, you could still hear the worry and uneasiness in his tone.

“No, I don’t know. Andy, it really hurts,” You could barely get out as you lurched forward in pain.

“Okay, love, I’m gonna get you to the hospital, alright? You’re gonna be okay, I promise,” Andrew told you as he pressed a reassuring kiss to the side of your head. He dashed around to find the first pieces of clothing he could find for you and himself before taking you bridal style in his arms, picking you up out of bed and rushing you to the hospital, the fear in his mind going haywire when he hadn’t missed the blood staining the sheets where you had previously been soundly asleep.

They said it could have happened to anyone. But, why did it have to happen to you? Had you done something wrong? Did you eat or drink something you weren’t supposed to? Was the baby still in distress and you never knew?

They’d asked if you wanted to see her before they took her away. Yeah, your baby was a girl, but you weren’t supposed to find out for another few months. And now, she was gone, and you had no logical clue as to why.

Since then, you’d catched Andrew in the room you’d make into the nursery. After the false positives and the miscarriages, you never made it into a nursery, afraid that if you started to soon on it, there would be no need for it. Turns out, there’s still no need for it. You’d catch Andrew every now and then holding something you had bought for your child. Most of the time it was a large purple stuffed teddy bear. It was the first thing you’d ever bought for your child. You couldn’t bear to get rid of it once she died.

You knew it would be hard to get pregnant again after having lost your first child. But, you still kept trying; although, after several years of trying, you were getting to the point where it was hard to keep going, you couldn’t keep experiencing this pain anymore. You’d really thought this one would have been the one, too.

Arriving home, Andrew parked in the driveway, turning off the car, but you made no attempt to move. It was as if all your energy and efforts to keep going in life were drained out of you.

Jumping out of the car, Andrew headed over to your side, opening your door. He reaches in, unbuckles your seat belt as you finally move to wrap your arms around his neck He pulled you out and held you in his arms, your legs wrapped around his waist as you clung to him like a koala.

You felt just a bit guilty for acting the way you were. This was hard not only on you but on Andrew, too. He’s been wanting a family with you for a long time, ever since he told you he loved you all those years ago, the time when you both realized the inevitability that you’d spend the rest of your lives together. Having him take care of you like this when he, too, was grieving over your nonexistent child wasn’t fair. You knew that. But you just didn’t have it in your to take care of yourself anymore. At least, not right now. Not when you’ve just found out something that you’ve heard way too many times.

Andrew told you once, though, that just holding you made him feel better, no matter the reason. As long as you were in his arms, he’d be okay. You just hoped this counted as one of those reasons. The thought didn’t make you feel any less guilty, though, for the burden you feel you’re settling on him.

Andrew carried you up the path and inside the house, locking the door behind him. Holding you from below with one hand, he used his other hand to take off your sunglasses and shoes, toeing off his own in the process. He carried you upstairs and into your shared bedroom. At this point, neither of you had it in you to do much else. So, Andrew crawled into bed, curling up in a ball with you wrapped safely, comfortably, and comfortingly in his arms. After wrapping you both in a soft blanket, he placed a kiss on your head, tightening his hold around you.

Once you stopped moving, the tears started streaming again, and Andrew let you cry until you couldn’t anymore. Even after, he still held you. Because, in the end, all either of you needed was to just be held.

[sebastianshaw]

CAN THEY USE CHOPSTICKS: Quite well!

WHAT DO THEY DO WHEN THEY CAN’T SLEEP:  Drinks, probably. Maybe fucks. 

WHAT WOULD THEY IMPULSE BUY AT THE GROCERY STORE: I don’t think Shaw impulse buys or visits grocery stores. 

WHAT ORDER DO THEY WASH THINGS IN THE SHOWER:   I am not going to think about this and you can’t make me

WHAT’S THEIR COFFEE ORDER: Espresso (single to triple), black, or black with cream, always a very high quality gourmet blend brand. Shaw’s got very strong opinions on coffee, as with whiskey and wine and tea and fragrances, but he’s also got ZERO judgement on like. . .really fancy complicated Starbucks orders that people like to make fun of. He might judge you for serving him a brand/blend he considers swill, but he’s absolutely not judging the hipster girl in front of him who gets a caramel venti mocha frappe latte or what have you. He thinks it’s weird people judge that, actually. Which is cool until you remember he’s still judging, just something else. 

WHAT SORT OF APPS WOULD THEY HAVE ON THEIR SMARTPHONE: Apps related to business, organizing, stocks, calendars/scheduling, and exercise/fitness. No games, no social media, and actually no hookup apps either. He doesn’t need those, his hookups come to him. 

HOW DO THEY ACT AROUND CHILDREN: Shaw is literally like a Dickens villain. He emotionally and physically abused his one canon child before abandoning him altogether, and I have no doubt he’s done the same to the many other children I headcanon he has. He treats his own children more cruelly because of his insanely high standards for them, but he’s certainly not kind to other kids either. Cold dismissal is the best-case scenario for any interaction between Shaw and a child. Also genuinely thinks they should be working in factories and mines again, though weirdly that’s got nothing to do with hating them and more to do with just genuinely not seeing why anyone shouldn’t be allowed to work based on age (and the fact he probably was a child worker himself under the table to help support himself his father as a kid, especially when his dad got sick.) Will hit a child, and with little provocation. Also would have no moral qualms taking candy from a baby except that’s off his diet.

Seriously Shaw is at a whole ‘nother level of “fuck them kids”

WHAT WOULD THEY WATCH ON TV WHEN THEY’RE BORED AND NOTHING THEY REALLY LIKE IS ON: I don’t think Shaw really even watches TV now that he can get most of his news from digital media. History channel, I guess. Maybe old movies that came out when he was a kid that he never got to see in theatres because he was too poor at the time. If Ghostbusters is on, that’s a fave of his, but the question said nothing he really likes is on? So I guess that wouldn’t be an option. I guess he’d watch horse racing/horse shows, car shows, maybe some Mythbusters because the engineering angle would appeal to him, probably a lot of Shark Tank type stuff. I think he might start watching Tiger King because the name sounds intriguing, but stop quickly because it’s just a showcase of various super dysfunctional personalities clashing in pointless drama towards inevitable failure, and he’s not interested in that. Like I think it would genuinely just piss him off. As a note though, the person who tagged me answered RuPaul’s Drag Race for their muse (Eros at @erosoftitan, go follow!) , and while I don’t think Shaw would ever choose to watch Drag Race on his own, I think if he ended up watching it somehow he’d actually be into it to a surprisingly (or not so surprising?) degree because of the competition angle and the work and effort the queens put into their costuming. I feel like he’d end up having Very Serious Opinions about who should win each challenge. My god, this could actually be something he and Shinobi bond over! Because you can’t tell me Shin isn’t a Drag Race nut.

Tagged by: @erosoftitan ​

Tagging: anyone but I especially challenge @sammysdewysensitiveeyes for Pyro, @katatonicimpression for Monet, @fiddlingonthetympanic, @fatummortem for TJ or Rose, @emmatriarchy for Topaz or Emma or Sage or Sarah or Maddie, @pndorawrites​ for Ajak or Talia or Kom, @deitysmuses​ for Maddie, @bothsidesofaquestion​, @kryptonianclone​ @huneibadger​ @mercyxgraves​, @southern-belle-outcasts​ for Remy or Rogue or Nilza, @therippingtides Ray, and @katzchxn because hi nice to see you again!

[streetlight11]

Strawberry Lattes

Summary: He always needs his morning caffeine to wake him up for his morning classes. He never knew what it feels like wanting to come back to a particular place again and again solely for one reason, until he met you. You were a full time barista and a part time university student. Despite the stress you get almost every week, your two friends have always been there to support you. What happens when your friends come to visit you at your workplace one day, only to find out that they were friends with the same boy who not only is your eye candy, but also your regular customer?

Genre: Super fluffy

Pairing: Kim Sunwoo x GN Reader

Word count: 5.5k

It was another dreadful morning after only 2 hours of sleep due to staying up all night hoping to finish at least 50% of the assignment. But this wasn’t an excuse for you to call in to work sick or unable to come for your shift. Hence, the reason why you were now forcing yourself out of bed to freshen up and get ready for work. You were a full time barista at a local café downtown just around the corner from your apartment, and also a part time student at Yonsei University.

The reason why you chose this path was because you wanted to further your studies but also earn a monthly allowance in order to pay for your school and house bills since you were living alone and didn't have the time to search for a roommate.

Despite the stress load you get every once in a while, you managed to cope and tried your best to pass each module. Today was no different, as you got ready for work and was out the door by 0730. You arrived at the café only to find your manager already preparing the coffee machines and restocking the cakes in the fridge beside the cashier. You greeted him good morning before he smiled at you.

You went into the back room to put your bag down and took your apron. Proceeding to head to the front where the cashier and coffee machines were.

“Did you get enough sleep yesterday?” Kihyun asked.

Before you could reply, a yawn left your lips as you used the back of your hand to cover your mouth slightly.

“Nope. But I’ll be fine.” You said. You could hear the heavy sigh that left his lips when he closed the fridge door and soon turned to you with a frown.

“(Y/N), you know you have to get some rest. It’s not good for your health.” Kihyun said, but you nodded.

“I know Ki, but I can’t fail this module.”

“Just… know when to take a break okay?”

“Okay.”

With that, he went to the back room to settle some paperwork while you stayed by the counter, refilling the powders into the containers. After you were done, a few customers had entered to buy their morning caffeine doses. 4 orders and 5 minutes of silence later, you leaned over the counter top with one knee resting on the stool in front of you that was hidden from any customer in plain sight.

You supported your head on your palm, slowly finding yourself drifting to sleep when the doorbell chimed, catching your attention. You looked up to see a guy walking into the café looking just as tired as you were but he had more life in him.

“Dang he’s cute.” You thought to yourself as you quickly wiped the pout off your face and soon replaced it with a warm smile.

“Good morning, may I take your order?” you greeted him.

He flashed you a soft smile before glancing up at the menu boards hanging above your head.

“Do you have any recommendations? I feel like trying something new.” He finally looked back down at you, only for you to feel as though your airflow got sucked out of your lungs.

“Personally I really like the Iced Matcha Latte with soy milk if I want a non-caffeinated drink. But if I want that espresso kick to start my mornings, I really love the Strawberry Latte, with two pumps of syrup and a light dash of strawberry sprinkles. It’s not too strong and it definitely gives you a sweet tangy balance to the bitter coffee taste.” You ended your speech with a light giggle after you realized how long it was.

The male only smiled fondly at you during that whole minute explanation but it was worth it. “Great, can I get the exact order for the second one then?” He said. You looked quite surprised but nonetheless smiled as you began to key in the order

“Choice of size?”

“Regular please.”

After you were done, you took the regular size takeaway cup and a marker, looking at him to ask for his name or initials.

“Sunwoo.”

The corner of your lips tugged upwards, writing down his name before setting the cup to your left beside the coffee machine and soon charged him for his order. After he was done paying, you returned him his change and gave the receipt before telling him to wait at the collection point. You made the drink exactly how you would make it for yourself. Smiling happily upon seeing your creation being prepared for not yourself, but this time for a customer.

After you had sprinkled the strawberry powder on top of the foam surface, you took the lid and secured it close before you went to the collection point and called out softly.

“Strawberry Latte for Sunwoo.” 

He walked forwards as he took the cup, not forgetting to give you a smile. 

“Thank you-” His eyes darted towards your name tag pinned to your apron before he looked back at you. “...(Y/N)”

You bowed to him slightly as you watched him leave the café. After he left, he didn’t forget to spare a quick glance into the café, only to see your smile soon disappeared. Replacing it with a small pout when you let out a sigh. Sunwoo chuckled as he continued walking to campus that was just 2 blocks away.

For some reason, he couldn’t stop thinking about you even after he made it to his first lecture. The small smile gracing on his lips didn’t go unnoticed by his friends as Kevin began to nudge Sunwoo’s elbow the minute he came to sit beside the former.

“Aye, why are you smiling like an idiot huh?” Kevin asked.

“Maybe he just sniffed a smiling gas.” Younghoon said.

“What the hell is that?” Jacob asked.

“I was being sarcastic you nimrod.” Younghoon said, making the former one growl.

“I’ll tell you guys later.” Sunwoo said as he couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. 

2 hours passed and they were now heading to the food hall in the main building, when Hyunjae slings his arm over Sunwoo’s shoulder.

“So? Why were you smiling all morning today?” He asked, causing the rest to focus their gazes on him as Sunwoo sighed knowing he couldn’t run away now.

“Ahh, it’s nothing… I went to get my morning coffee and there was this really cute barista who attended to me. That’s all.”

A series of “ooh”s were heard as the boys got noisier by the second.

“Jeez, can y’all shut up? You’re embarrassing me.” Sunwoo said as he quickened his pace, only for Younghoon to grab hold of his backpack and pulled him back.

“Oh please, you should be thankful we even gave reactions to what you say.” Younghoon said, making Sunwoo scoff. 

A few weeks later, you were just handing a customer her plate of pasta and a cappuccino at one of the tables when you heard the doorbell chime. The customer you were attending to, thanked you for bringing her orders to her, smiling and replied to her.

“Your welcome. Enjoy your food.”

With that, you began to walk back to the front counter when you saw a group of guys gathered in front of the cashier. Right when you were just about to walk past them to head behind the counter, one of them glanced towards his right only to lock eyes with you. It was Sunwoo. The same regular customer that came every morning before his classes. The same guy who you may or may not have a tiny crush on.

The moment you locked eyes, you could feel your heartbeat stop for just a millisecond later as he flashed you a soft smile. This was enough to make you blush as you smiled back to him shyly before quickly making your way behind the counter.

“Oh great, you’re back. Help me take their order will you? I have to prepare the delivery ones.” Kihyun said simply. You were about to protest but you had no choice since the other part timer was on his lunch break.

So you nodded defeatedly before you returned the tray back at the collection point before you went back to the cashier, only to see Sunwoo standing there alone.

“Hey.” Sunwoo said as his lips began to tug upwards.

“Hey. What can I get you today?” You asked with a shy smile. Your voice sounded much softer than usual. You didn’t miss the little chuckle that left his lips before he spoke up.

“There’s gonna be a bit more than one order today.”

“I can see that.” You joked.

“Can I get one regular iced mocha, two regular double chocolate frappe, one small iced americano, one regular iced vanilla latte, and my usual please.”

You keyed in his orders as he spoke, only for you to look back up at him to confirm if that was all he wanted. Sunwoo gave you a firm nod, proceeding to charge him for the orders and soon told him to have a seat, you will call out to him once the drinks are ready. Sunwoo nodded as he left, not forgetting to smile at you for the umpteenth time that day.

You soon came beside Kihyun and started to make the drinks. Sunwoo on the other hand, immediately got dragged down into his seat by Kevin when they began to make comments about you.

“You were right, they’re hella cute!” Kevin said.

“Do you think they’re attached?” Younghoon asked.

“I don’t know. I mean, they’re quite cute. It’s impossible they’re single.” Sangyeon shrugged.

“Not all good looking people are attached. Even some normal looking ones are attached. We can’t just judge from their looks.” Sunwoo said defensively, only for Changmin and Haknyeon to smirk.

“Or are you just saying that because you want them to be single?” Changmin said, causing the rest of them to agree teasingly.

“Whatever, they wouldn’t date someone like me anyway.” Sunwoo said.

Not long after he finished his sentence, your voice echoes around the café walls as you called his name.

“Drinks for Sunwoo.”

With that, Sunwoo got up and soon jogged his way to the collection point, only to find you standing behind the counter with the tray in hand. You smiled as you pushed the tray gently towards him.

“Be careful. It’s heavy.” You warned.

“Don’t worry.” Sunwoo said, couldn’t help but smile at him.

He soon came back to their table and distributed the drinks. Almost half an hour had passed, they were just talking about random topics when Sunwoo happened to glance towards the counter. Seeing you laugh at something your manager said.

He didn’t realize he was smiling until Sangyeon spoke up. “Sunwoo yah, if they make your heart flutter that much, why don’t you just go there and ask them out?”

Sunwoo whips his head to Sangyeon, almost pulling a muscle while doing that.

“What?! N-No!”

“Why not?”

“The last time I asked someone out, I got turned down harshly in front of everyone. I couldn’t sleep for days!”

“Sunwoo yah, you’re just thinking too much. Just try and ask them out. Who knows they’ll accept?” Haknyeon asked.

“I don’t wanna risk it.” Sunwoo said. Glancing back to the front counter.

“Why must I have a crush on the cutest barista working just two blocks away from campus?” Sunwoo thought to himself as he gently shook his head and went back into the conversation with the guys.

A few minutes passed, some of them were discussing their project work while some were doing their own stuff when Sunwoo saw you left the counter only to walk towards an empty table near the back of the café. Since the café was not so packed, Kihyun told you to eat at one of the tables. So as to not feel cramped in the back room.

You had a transparent cup filled with what seems to be strawberry latte and a plate of sandwich. Sunwoo was caught staring by his friends as Younghoon nudged his arm to gain his attention.

“This is your chance to talk to them.”

Sunwoo saw some of them nod in agreement as he glanced back at you who was just taking a bite of the sandwich while scrolling through your phone.

With much motivation, he finally got up and made his way towards your table. You were just looking at your Instagram feed when you saw a figure come to a stop on the opposite side of your table.

You looked up to see Sunwoo standing there with a nervous smile as he spoke up. “Do you need some company?” He asked. You giggled, locking your phone screen and soon placed it face down on the table.

“Sure, that would be great.” You said. He pulled the chair out and soon took a seat.

“You’re just having that for lunch?” He asked curiously as he looked at the plate in front of you.

“Mmm.”

“Is that enough to fill you for the rest of your shift?” He asks, genuinely concerned at how little you ate.

“Yeap! Don’t worry. I always get something heavy to eat before my night classes.”

Sunwoo paused only to raise his eyebrows in confusion.

“Night classes?”

“I’m a part time student at Yonsei U. That’s why I’m a full timer here.”

“Wow… Are you able to cope with work and study at the same time?”

“It can be tiring and mentally exhausting sometimes but I persevere.”

Sunwoo was shocked at this new information but nonetheless gave you some comforting words to help cheer you on. “That’s… a lot to take in. I hope you don’t stress yourself out too much. Please get some rest and don’t overwork yourself.”

You hadn't seen this side of him before but it was very sweet of him to even say all those things to you. You ended up chatting for a bit, only for you both to find out that he was a student at Hankuk U, you were the same age, you both loved sushi and many more.

Your lunch break was ending soon but you were dreading to say goodbye. “Well, it was really nice talking to you Sunwoo, but I’m afraid my break time’s almost over.” 

You pouted sadly, only for him to chuckle.

“Do you have class tonight?”

You nodded.

“Hmm, don’t worry okay? I’ll see you tomorrow morning.” Sunwoo said, making you giggle at his disclaimer.

The both of you got up only for him to speak up.

“My friends and I are leaving soon too. I’ll see you tomorrow. Take care, don’t forget to eat before you head to class!” He reminded you. Not forgetting to give him a nod.

A few days later, you had just ended your night class and you were almost burned out for the day, you could barely keep your eyes open. Only for your phone to ring. It was Eric.

“Hello?” You said into the line.

“Hey! Are you finished with class?”

“Yeah. I’m heading down now. Where are you?”

“At the parking lot. Me and Chanhee hyung decided to wait for you today.”

With that being said, you gasped lightly, unable to digest this information.

“Wha- Eric are you serious? You didn’t have to- omg.”

“No, it’s fine! Besides, me and hyung needed to discuss something anyway. Meet us at the parking lot okay?”

Before you could reply, he already hung up the call, making you sigh. You felt bad for making them wait for you since it was already half past 10 at night. But then again, they did it out of their own will. You arrived at the parking lot, only to see Chanhee and Eric leaning against the side of Chanhee’s car amongst a few other vehicles left just chatting away while waiting for you.

Just then, Eric glanced towards the entrance, only to see a very tired you dragging your feet towards them. You could barely open your eyes as you held onto your bag strap for your dear life. Right when you had just arrived in front of them, your vision blacked out, feeling your head pound against your skull. You let out a soft groan, falling forwards, just in time for Eric to catch you.

“Woah, are you okay?” He asked worriedly as Chanhee and him exchanged glances to one another.

“Mmm, y-yeah… I just blacked out for a bit.” You said, only to hear Chanhee sigh.

“How many times must we tell you not to overwork yourself and get some sleep?” Chanhee said.

“I did sleep...” You tried to defend yourself, but they knew you better than you know yourself. 

“How many hours did you sleep last night?” Eric asked as he narrowed his eyes at you questioningly. You avoided their piercing gazes by answering their question in a hushed tone. 

“An hour and a half.” 

With that, your two friends let out a heavy sigh as Eric looked disappointed in his friend. It wasn’t because he was mad at you, it was because he was growing more and more concerned over your sleeping patterns and your health. You weren't just schooling, you were working as well so it would only be right if you maintained a healthy sleeping pattern and a balanced work/study time.

“That’s it. You’re coming home with me. I’m gonna make sure you get that sleep you so well deserved.” Chanhee said as Eric nodded in agreement.

“What? No, I’m fine. Okay, I promise I’ll sleep tonight.” You said.

“Yeah right.”

“You don’t trust me?” You asked with a pout.

“On this? No, I don’t.” With that, you scoffed as you knew you couldn’t fight back with them. So with that being said, you ended up following Chanhee to his apartment since he lived alone. Once you were back at Chanhee’s place, he told you to wash up. He let you borrow a loose shirt and sleeping shorts.

He told you to sleep in his bed and that he could take the couch. At first you rejected it, saying you could sleep on the couch but he refused. 

Chanhee purposely placed your bag in the living room so that you couldn’t sneakily stay up all night and worked on your assignment. Chanhee’s body clock was never normal to begin with but to him, your sleeping pattern was more important than his.

Hence, the reason why he was still awake at 3am, watching the live broadcast of the World Cup. He was trying so hard to keep quiet to avoid waking you up as he eagerly watched the tournament. Just then, he thought he heard soft whimpers in his head.

“What the-” He mumbled to himself as he continued watching the game.

Just then, the whimper sounded again and it was a lot more distinct this time. With that, he lowered down the volume just to see if that sound would appear again. Not long after, he heard the whimper again and it seemed to have come from his hallway.

Chanhee got up immediately as he went to his bedroom, opening the door gently.

That’s when he saw you shifting uncomfortably in your sleep. He approached you in a rush as he saw you clutching onto the blanket against your chest as you had a frown on your face.

You were mumbling something in your sleep but he couldn’t really catch what you said.

“(Y/N)? Hey wake up.” Chanhee said softly as he placed a hand on your shoulder and lightly shook it. It took him 3 tries to finally get you awake when you jolted forward. Your breathing was heavy as you sat there with cold sweat running down the side of your face.

“It’s okay (Y/N), you’re okay. I’m here. It’s just a nightmare.” He comforted you while grabbing a handful of his shirt.

He pulled you into a hug, feeling your body shiver. They stayed like that for a while, only for him to tuck you back in bed. He pushed your hair away from your face as he looked down at you gently with a soft smile.

“Goodnight (Y/N).”

“Goodnight Chanhee.”

He was about to walk away when you grabbed his hand.

“Thank you… for everything.”

Chanhee could only smile, gently caressing the back of your hand with his thumb and soon spoke up.

“Get some rest, (Y/N).” You nodded only to let go of his hand. You fell back asleep a few seconds after as he went back to the living room, only to turn off the television and went to sleep himself.

It has been 4 months since Sunwoo first came to the café and you've gotten a lot closer than before. 

However, Sunwoo still has yet to ask you out on a date.

It was a chilly Wednesday afternoon and both Chanhee and Eric promised to visit you after their lecture. The time was 35 minutes past 2 and the two guys had just entered the café, settling themselves into one of the empty tables beside the glass window after they ordered their drinks.

After making their drinks, you made your own drink and took one of the sandwiches from the fridge. Making your way to them for your lunch break.

“Hey guys, one iced mocha and one iced matcha latte for the two sweetest guys I’m lucky to have as friends.” You said, causing the two boys to smirk.

“Just friends?” Eric teased.

“Best friends.” You corrected yourself, only for Chanhee to laugh at Eric’s pained reaction.

“Ouch, never thought I’d be friend zoned this quick.”

You found yourself giggling as you spoke up to comfort your friend while you took a seat beside him.

“I love you, Eric ah.”

He couldn’t find himself being angry at you as he immediately melted and soon became a giggling mess. You were just chatting away, gossiping about the same stuck up girl in their class who keeps acting as if everyone was head over heels for when they’re actually not.

Just then, a familiar voice calls out to Chanhee and Eric from a distance behind you making your heart skip a beat.

“Hey! Hyung! Eric ah!”

Chanhee glanced past your shoulder while Eric turned to look over his own shoulder before they smiled widely and waved eagerly to whoever was behind you.

“That voice…” You whispered under your breath, only to slowly turn around. That’s when you saw Sunwoo walking up to your table along with his usual group of friends. However, you didn’t miss the look on Sunwoo’s face when he locked eyes with you. He was definitely surprised but also confused as to why you were seated with his friends.

“Oh? It’s the cute barista!” Juyeon said innocently. Flashing them a bashful smile. Just then, both Chanhee and Eric turned to look at each other simultaneously only for them to look at you and spoke up in unison.

“You’re the cute barista Sunwoo’s been talking about?!”

With that, Sunwoo gestured a punch to them signalling them to keep quiet. Only for him to look at you and ask.

“You know them?” 

You could only nod as you told him the truth.

“I’ve known them since college.”

The rest of the boys gasped at the newly profound information. They couldn’t believe you were mutual friends with Chanhee and Eric. The 12 of you ended up sitting in two separate tables side by side whilst Chanhee and Eric began to spill the tea about Sunwoo.

“I can’t believe he’s been talking about you all these while.” Eric said.

“If I had known sooner, I would have set you two up on a date.” Chanhee said, causing you to glance at Sunwoo who was sitting opposite you. You cleared your throat and glanced down at your wrist watch before you got up abruptly to avoid any more awkward conversations.

“Oh look, my break time is ending. Nice talking to you guys. Thanks for visiting me today, my babies. More cakes for you? Yes? Okay.” You said in a rush. Quickly leaving the table, earning a laugh from the guys. Thinking that your actions are cute.

“Sunwoo, you really have a good taste don’t you?” Eric teased, making Sunwoo throw a tissue paper packet to Eric’s face, catching the poor boy by surprise.

You were in the back room, having a short break when your co-worker, Mingi called for you from the door.

“(Y/N), somebody wants to talk to you. He said he’s a friend of yours?” Mingi said, making you hum in confusion but nonetheless left the back room.

Only to be met with Sunwoo standing at the collection point.

“Sunwoo?”

“Hey, umm, I was wondering… Are you… free, this weekend?” You found yourself blushing as you tried to come up with a quick response.

“Uhh yeah. Yeah, I’m free.” Sunwoo didn’t expect you to say yes so quickly but it definitely made him feel slightly happy that he didn’t get rejected.

“Great. Umm, I’ll pick you up at 8?”

“Okay.” You smiled genuinely.

“Okay… Well, I uhh, better get going. Bye (Y/N). See you.” He said shyly, his ears starting to burn red.

“See you Sunwoo.” You said, only for him to quickly leave before his whole tomato head explodes.

Weekends finally came and it was already 30 minutes past 7 and you were struggling to find a nice outfit to wear. You didn’t know exactly where he was taking you, all he said was to wear nicely. You were nervous to say the least. You haven't been on a date in like what? 2 years?

Ever since your last date where you got stood up, you decided not to go on any more blind dates. You would rather stay single for the rest of your life than being played with and getting your heart broken again and again.

Sunwoo texted you a few minutes later saying he was downstairs so you replied by saying you’ll be down in a minute. You soon left your apartment and locked the doors before heading down the corridor towards the lift lobby. Once you were at ground level, you made your way out, only to see Sunwoo leaning against his car door.

The minute he noticed your figure walking towards him, he looked up only to give you a one over. You stopped a few feet in front of him with a shy smile as he spoke up.

“Wow, you look really stunning.”

“Thank you. You look dashing.” You giggled.

Sunwoo was wearing a dark blue button down shirt tucked into his black denim skinny jeans, a pair of black sneakers and a few stainless steel accessories. He recently dyed his hair to a deep berry colour. He soon opened the door for you. Getting in before he walked over to the driver seat. Once he was in, he buckled his seatbelt and started his car engine.

“Where are we going?” You asked.

“It’s a surprise.” Sunwoo said with a cheeky smile as you could feel your heartstrings pull.

The drive to the destination wasn’t as long as you thought, maybe because the journey was filled with jokes and laughter every now and then. Before you knew it, he finally pulled into a parking lot at what seems to be an outdoor movie theatre.

“Sunwoo yah… This is…” You paused as you got out of the car while he reached over to the back seat to take the blanket he brought to lay it down on the grass. He came back to your side after locking his car, only for you to continue from where you left off.

“So cute. How did you even find out about this outdoor movie?”

He smiled as you both began to walk towards the open space where quite a lot of couples were already seated down on their own blankets.

“My friend told me about this when he went on a date with his girlfriend the other day. So I figured why not give it a try.” Sunwoo said, making you blush.

You managed to find an empty space so he laid down the blanket and soon sat down. While waiting for the movie, you talked about almost anything. The movie soon started as everyone was starting to get excited. Halfway through the beginning of the movie, you were sitting beside Sunwoo with your legs extended out in front of you.

The night slowly got breezy, feeling the cool air blowing on you softly. Just then, he saw you straightening your posture, rubbing your arms to keep yourself warm. He felt bad that he couldn’t give you his jacket since he didn’t wear any.

However, an idea flashed across his mind, making him turn to you to speak.

“Hey, are you cold?” He asked. You turned to him with a small smile before you answered.

“Yeah, but it’s fine. It’s just a little chilly, that’s all.” Sunwoo wasn’t convinced as he saw your teeth clattering, making him chuckle softly.

“You know, I heard from somewhere that close body contact can keep us warm.” Sunwoo suggests indirectly to you, turning your head to him to see a playful smile on his lips.

You giggled as you looked at him with your brows raised.

“Are you okay with it?”

“If I wasn’t, I wouldn’t suggest it would I?” He asked, causing you to mentally facepalm at your ridiculous self.

“Right. You have a point.”

You heard him chuckle when he pat the empty spot in between his legs, gesturing for you to come over.

“C’mere.” He said.

Once you have settled down between his legs, you feel him wrap his arms around your body, trapping your arms. Gently pressing your back against his chest. Warmth immediately engulfing you both as you snuggled deeper into his chest.

“Warm enough?” He asked, only for you to nod.

You stayed like that for the rest of the movie. Sacrificing his back if it meant keeping you warm throughout the 1 and a half hours of the movie. 

After the movie ended, you went to get supper before he sent you home. You agreed to let him walk you all the way to your door. Hence, the reason why you were now standing outside your apartment door. You unlocked the door but then turned around to face him.

“Thank you for today Sunwoo. It was a fun experience watching a movie outdoors for the first time under the starry night.” You said as he smiled.

“I’m glad you liked it…”

“I hope we can do something like this again soon.” At that being said, his ears perked up, staring at you in awe.

“A-Again? Does that mean…?” He paused, causing you to giggle.

“Yes. I’d love to go on a date with you again.” 

Sunwoo couldn’t contain his excitement as he smiled from ear to ear, his adorable toothy grin made your heart skip a few beats. He elicited a soft giggle, biting his lip to stop himself from smiling too much.

Just then, you decided to take it upon yourself by pressing a soft kiss onto his cheek. Sunwoo was frozen in place as you smiled up to him endearingly before you bid him goodbye. You quickly entered your apartment to hide your flushed face when you could feel the embarrassment starting to creep up on you. You leaned against the door. Trying to steady your heartbeat.

After what felt like forever, you finally pushed yourself off the door and was about to walk deeper into your apartment when there was a knock.

You turned around to open it and you were greeted by Sunwoo again, seeming he finally came into senses.

Without any words exchanged, he took one quick step forward, reaching up to cup your face with one hand before he gently pressed his lips against yours. You melted almost immediately when you felt him smile into the kiss. Sunwoo could feel his heart get weaker, snaking one hand around your waist while pulling you closer to him.

Your hands rested on his chest as he pulled away with a soft sound, only for you to keep your gaze on his collarbone. Too shy to look at him in the eye.

Sunwoo gently took your chin in between his thumb and index finger. Tilting your head up, making you lock eyes with him.

“I’m pretty sure that just proves to you how I feel about you, but I still wanna tell you in words. I really, really like you. And I would love to take you out on more dates and be able to call you mine.”

With his cute confession, you couldn’t help but giggle. Wrapping your arms around his neck before you spoke up.

“I like you too Sunwoo. And yes, I would love to go on dates with you, and for you to call me yours.” With that being said, Sunwoo smiled in victory. Kissing you again sweetly.

The next day, you broke the news to your friends as you got happy cheers and excited screams in the group chat. Sunwoo never thought he would date anyone after being rejected multiple times but maybe he was fated to meet you and be the person who orders the same drink every time at the café you worked in. Maybe now he could finally live his love life with more cuddles and Strawberry Lattes.

[caztiel]

Hi

hi baby i met you in line for coffee frappe on almond milk sustained train of thought not feasible for only twelve seconds at a time. choking the guitar out feeling like a failure last night i dressed like a dyke again and i swear the girl in the mirror was more me than i'll ever be. sick of running into ghosts still living breathing cut the cake like it's my only job drunk people i once knew estranged siblings and surprise parties i'd rather die than seize the moment can we do it all again? can we meet in the minutiae of day to day?

[boymeetsweevil]

binary stars

Grouping: Reader x Bff!Hyuck

Word Count: ~8.4k

Warnings/Themes: friends to lovers, insecurity, pining, jealous hyuck, like a teaspoon of suggestiveness, yuta is here because i love him

Prompt: “bff!hyuck + friends to lovers. college au and slightly nsfw or however nsfw u wanna make it”

A/N: This commissioned fic is part of the Changes with Luv project, hosted by FicsWithLuv. Here you can find more information about the project, cause, places to donate, and ways to commission a piece or offer your services if you are a content creator. Thank you!

The food court is crowded when you get there. It’s a bit later than ideal after morning classes followed by a study session in the library.

“What are you gonna get,” Donghyuck asks while slinging an arm around your shoulder.

While squinting up at the menu up ahead, he whispers into your ear. Just to make sure his question doesn’t get lost in the chatter around you. You still get goosebumps, though.

“All I know is that it can’t be a bagel. I’m starting to get sick of those.” You rub your arm and he mistakes it for you being cold.

Donghyuck pulls you closer while mumbling half to himself and half to you about what he’ll get.

“I heard they have this new sandwich thing. Johnny told me it has hash browns as the bread.” He peers down at you. “You could try that.”

“Did he say if it was filling or not?”

“No, but if it’s too big for you to eat, we can share it. Or you can use some of my tupperware when we get home,” he says.

When he says ‘home’, he really just means his dorm. There’s a section in the communal first floor kitchen that belongs to him, and it houses all the things his mom sent him with for survival years ago.

Home. As in ‘where you have a place too’. It’s a small difference from your classmates and other friends who say ‘the dorm’ or ‘my place’. But it’s also one of the many ways in which Donghyuck invites you in and makes you feel special. It’s one of the reasons you fell for your best friend.

“Why don’t you just get it?” You try to wriggle out of his grasp but he doesn’t notice and tightens up as the line moves up a bit. “It sounds like you’re the one who wants it, not me.”

“I would...but I think it’s one of the ‘deluxe’ sandwiches.” He pivots so he can envelope you fully from behind, puppy dog eyes out and at the ready. “And I’m in the red again this week.”

“Okay, why are you always in the red? What are you spending your money on?”

You miss the way his eyes drift down instinctively to the empty frappe cup you hold.

“I don’t know. The money just escapes me.”

“It’s a good thing you’re not an econ major, then.”

“Hey!”

He squeezes you tightly from behind and starts to shake you around like a ragdoll. A couple people in line turn at the sudden commotion while you scrabble at the tight vice his arms make around you.

Moments like these are the ones where, if you step back, you could convince yourself that Donghyuck was your boyfriend instead of just your best friend. But you know better than to think that you and he are in the same league. Even if you were, you’d probably be at the back of the line because he’s almost too easy to love.

Donghyuck is the whole package. When he’s not lighting up a room with his charisma and humor, he’s stealing everyone’s attention with his handsome face. It doesn’t help that he’s naturally flirty and generous with touch. Sometimes you think that maybe there’s some side of him that only you get to see, but other times—

“Hyuck!”

You and Donghyuck turn at the same time to see Mila, one of Donghyuck’s department-mates running towards your spot in the slow moving line. The moment stops being private and suddenly there’s a sort of shame bubbling up inside of you. Maybe it’s because you know that people think you’re an odd pair, that Donghyuck is misguided and charitable for hanging out with you. He’s never mentioned it, and the one time you did he blew up at you about it. But still, there’s something about third party appraisal that makes you feel like you’re in someone else’s spot. For all you know it could be Mila’s spot. She’s bright too. Not as bright as Donghyuck, but brighter than you. Since she started coming around Donghyuck, you’ve accepted this. The fact that she now uses your nickname for him makes you feel a whole new type of loss, though.

“Hey,” you both greet her.

She lays a hand on his forearm, squeezing lightly. “Hey, how are you? I’ve been looking for you.”

“Oh, what for?”

“You owe me a movie, silly.”

“Like a physical movie?”

You snort at his obliviousness and Mila responds with a quick glance at the way he drapes himself over you.

“No! Remember when you gave me those movie recommendations?”

“Yeah. To watch on your own time. You don’t have to watch them with me just because I mentioned them.”

“But where’s the fun in that?”

She pouts, grabs his free arm and tugs just hard enough to jostle him. With his arms wrapped around you, you stumble forward when he does.

“Oh, sorry.” Her hands come out like they’re going to steady you, but they get nowhere close enough to actually do the job. “Didn’t see you there.”

“She said ‘hi’,” Donghyuck chimes in before you can make up some excuse for why it’s okay that you almost fell on your face.

“I must have just missed you then,” she gazes down at you, “You’re so quiet.”

“Just watching the line,” you say.

The line moves forward and Mila moves with you. Clearly she’s not planning on leaving. She’s waiting you out and it’s working. You feel awkward enough that you need to get out, even if it means you cede something to Mila.

“Hyuck,” You turn and lay your hand on the back of his neck. It looks like a comfortable hand on the shoulder that went too far north, but that trajectory was calculated. He shivers like you know he will because he always does. It’s been a sensitive spot since you met him.

“Huh?” His voice is already sounding far away.

“I’m gonna go wait at a table. You can order for me.”

You make a point to pat at the arms he has wrapped around your middle still. The motion drags Mila’s eyes to the point of contact and she smirks a little. Donghyuck might only see you as a friend, but Mila mistakenly sees you as an obstacle. It’s petty, but you kind of want to make her think she has to work a little hard to get to him. Even if you don’t stand a chance.

In the end, the flash in Mila’s eyes is worth having to go find a place to sit during the lunch rush. You replay the moment over in your head, barely watching where you’re going in the crowded food court until you run into someone. If it weren’t for the quick pair of hands grabbing your upper arms at the last second, you might have taken a rather nasty fall.

“I’m sorry, that was my fault.”

“We’ve gotta stop meeting like this.”

The hands disappear once you’re stable while the voice lingers. It’s familiar but you don’t know why. When you take too long to put a name to a face, the person chuckles at you. At the very least, this mystery person is uniquely handsome with pretty teeth.

“You don’t remember me?”

“Can I have a hint?”

“What if you pretend to throw up on my shirt? Then would you remember?”

“Oh god,” you cover your face with your hands. Suddenly you recall the party last week where the pizza didn’t agree with you. “Yuta,” you groan.

“Hmm. My name sounds nice when you say it like that.”

You feel your face get hot as you peek at him from between your fingers. Last week you’d fallen face first into his lap while he was innocently sitting on a sofa. You’d proceeded to throw up onto his chest after he asked you for your name.

“Just kill me. It’d be less painful than this.”

“I don’t know. I think me still trying to hit on you afterward just for your boyfriend to send me murder eyes and whisk you away was way more painful than a little bit of vomit.”

“My boyfriend?”

“That little Hyucko guy, right?”

Yuta points behind you, and you turn to find him gesturing at Donghyuck. He’s still with Mila, but he’s clearly watching you talk with Yuta instead of engaging in small talk in line. You wave him off, hoping he’s not thinking you’re in danger.

“He’s not my boyfriend.”

“Sucks for him, then.”

Furrowing your brows, you return your gaze back to Yuta.

“But good for me,” he continues, “I don’t have to feel bad for asking you for your number now.”

“M-my number?”

“Is there another way to get to know the girl who threw up on me?”

“Uh, sure, why not?”

Yuta hands you his phone with a smile that looks so triumphant, you have to turn away slightly. His gaze on you is a bit too open, too pleased. You’re definitely not used to this type of attention, but you can’t say you’re mad at him for it. After typing in your number and name, he takes the phone back and reads your name out loud. When you nod in confirmation, he smiles wider.

“So, what are you studying then?”

“I’m studying political science.”

Yuta lets out a low whistle. “Sounds tough.”

“Sometimes, yeah. What are you studying?”

“Astronomy.”

“That’s very romantic.” He smiles in response.

“I suppose so, yeah. I guess you’d have to be romantic to look into an abyss full of flaming gas balls and think that’s fascinating.”

“Sorry to hear about your hot balls. You should probably get that checked out. I’m studying literature.”

Donghyuck shows up with a tray full of your food and takeout containers.

Yuta raises an eyebrow. “‘Sup?”

“What are you doing here? Did you come to bully the baristas?”

“Clever,” Yuta eyes him up and down. “You know I’m a grad student in the astronomy department. How do you forget every time?”

“Ah, you’re right. How could I forget. So what are you, like, 45 now?”

“Hyuck!”

“Sorry,” he sniffs. Clearly, he’s not sorry.

He trudges off to the nearest empty table to put the food down long enough to pack it up. You follow behind, with Yuta trailing alongside you.

“I’m sorry about him. Usually he’s...well, actually he is kind of like that.”

“I don’t mind. I just wanted to say that it was nice to finally meet you officially,” he starts off.

“Oh, uh, yeah. Same.”

Something about your response must be funny because Yuta laughs again to himself before shoving his phone back in his pocket.

“Can I call you some time?”

“Me?”

He laughs again. “Yes, you.”

“Okay.”

“Cool.”

You say your goodbyes to Yuta. It’s awkwardly formal because you’re not sure how these things usually go. When you finish waving a stilted hand at him, you turn around to find the food has been packed up and Donghyuck is fuming silently behind you.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong. I just don’t get why he of all people decided to butt in.”

He starts walking towards the exit, long legs eating up the distance at a speed that means you have to jog a little.

“You sure something’s not up? Because I don’t really get what we were doing that was so important in the first place. Not much to butt in on anyway.”

“Well, you know.”

“No, I don’t.”

He huffs and continues speed walking. “We had plans to eat lunch at my place. And he delayed that. Now I’m even hungrier.”

“I thought we were eating at your place because you weren’t hungry enough to eat there.”

“I—I mean, yeah. But I started getting hungry in line.”

You point at the wrapped muffin in his hand. “Couldn’t you have just eaten that?”

“This...is for later.”

Normally you’d try to figure out what it is that’s making Donghyuck so pissy. But your phone starts chiming and by the time you got to his front door, the little message notification on your phone had gone off a dozen times—all of them from Yuta as you message him on and off. Donghyuck settles for sighing dramatically every time you check your phone.

“Doesn’t he have, like, blimps to stare at? This is too much.”

“Since when is there a limit on how much I text someone?”

“There’s not but—isn’t this a lot? You just met him today.”

“Technically we met last weekend.”

He scowls but admits the point with a wave of his hand and a bite of his food.

“Still. I don’t even text you that much.” Donghyuck sits back in his chair before scoffing. “And no one should text you more than me. I’m your best friend.”

“But what if he was my boyfriend?”

“He’s not,” he snaps. There’s enough intensity in his voice to surprise you both. He reels it in a bit with an apologetic tilt of his shoulders over his plate. “Sorry. But—have you heard what people say about him? He’s a complete dick to the people he sleeps with. Plus, he’s ancient.”

“He’s only turning 26 in October.”

“So you know his birthday now?”

“Yes?” You put your napkin down, hash browns nearly finished. “And maybe I’m using him too. Bet you didn’t think of that.”

“Oh,” he says after a beat.

“Anyway, I don’t get why you’re so mad about this.”

“M’not mad,” he mumbles.

“Sure.”

You continue texting Yuta as you eat your lunch. Donghyuck huffs as he discards his trash and goes to his room to change into more comfortable clothes. While he’s gone, you glance at your phone guiltily.

It’s not that you’re so engrossed with the smalltalk with Yuta that you can’t put your phone down. Honestly, you want to just put your phone down and go plaster yourself to your best friend. But standing less than 2 feet away from Donghyuck and still feeling like he was unreachable earlier at the cafeteria really knocked some sense into you. If Donghyuck was the sun, you were merely a planet caught in his pull, orbiting around him. He wasn’t meant to orbit around you.

Donghyuck emerges from his room looking only mildly pouty at this point and in a sweatshirt and joggers. Seeing him in pajamas is your favorite thing. It’s why you like hanging out at his place so much because as soon as you settle in, he changes out of his regular clothes.

“Are you staying?” There’s only a touch of petulance still lingering in his voice.

“Do you want me to stay?”

“Of course.”

He says it so matter-of-factly that you have to turn away under the guise of finishing the last bites of your lunch to hide a shy smile. The words sound so sweet coming from his lips, even when it’s not meant in the way you wish.

You settle down on the couch to get some more work done, but the hash browns sneak up on you. Donghyuck watches silently from his battered copy of Dante’s Inferno at your eyes drooping closed. He’s known you long enough to know the signs of your food comas when he sees them. He shuts his book after marking the page and gets up from his spot on the carpet.

“Come on,” he shakes your upper arm lightly.

“What? What’s going on?”

“Let’s watch some TV.”

“I’m working, I can’t just—”

“You've been on the same page for 15 minutes.

“How would you know?”

“Because I stopped reading 20 minutes ago.”

By now, any traces of his strange anger are replaced by smug amusement. You let yourself be manhandled off your seat and take the trek to his bedroom. He flips through channels while you can dig something up from his closet to change into. Donghyuck has a strict no street clothes rule when it comes to lounging.

“Sexy,” he drawls, looking at your outfit choice.

It’s one of his shirts with an oversized neckline due to an accident with the 10-year-old dryers in the basement of the dorms and a pair of ratty long johns to beat the cold of the AC. It’s not cute per se but it was all he had clean.

“Shut up.” You sit down near the arm of the couch next to him. “What are you gonna do after this? Don’t you have a department dinner?”

“Yeah, but I can skip it.”

“Hyuck, don’t skip department events.”

“I already have a rec letter from Dr. Chittaphon, though. So I don’t need to kiss ass anymore”

“He finally wrote it for you?”

In your excitement, you grab his closest hand in yours, giving a congratulatory smile. He smiles back an almost tender smile. In the privacy of his own dorm with none of his other classmates around, he nods with some enthusiasm.

“He told me about it yesterday. He said I can use it for as many lit programs as I want.”

“That’s amazing.”

Donghyuck’s cheeks flush a deep ruby as he fiddles with the knitted quilt to pull over you. True to his word he has some inane show queued up on the tiny TV he brought with him from home. But once the lights are off and the coffee table is pushed close enough to support your feet, you succumb to sleep. Donghyuck is radiating warmth and an extra something that, combined with the background noise from the TV, makes you feel like you’re floating. You shift so you’re pillowed by the arm of the couch and drift off pretend the moment is something else.

***

You wake up from the nap to the sound of your phone alerting you to a new message. The phone is resting on the coffee table, so you sit up to get it only to realize you can’t quite move. Donghyuck’s arms are wrapped tightly around your torso and his head has migrated to your shoulder from it’s resting place when he was sitting up. He’s so close that the tip of his nose grazes your neck. You test just how stuck you are by moving toward the table a bit. Donghyuck responds with a grumble and a warning nuzzle of his cheek against your clavicle.

The moment you decide to move one of his arms, he pulls you in closer and presses his open mouth to your exposed shoulder. It feels almost like a kiss, but then he lets out a snore that reminds you of your family pug and all the romance is gone. You continue to shift as best you can to reach your phone.

The notification on your screen tells you that the message is from Yuta, yet again. Donghyuck is still fast asleep when you peek down at him. Just to be sure he doesn’t wake up, you turn onto your side. Even in his sleep he follows you, readjusting his grip on you while slotting his face into your nape and his knees behind yours. Thankfully the couch is wide enough that he doesn’t push you off the edge. With the brightness and volume turned down, you open up your messages.

there’s gonna be another NKT frat party in two weeks it’ll be no fun if you’re not there

Donghyuck’s words about Yuta’s reputation ring in your head but you don’t really care. Instead his flirtation makes you feel zippy. He might be a player but you’re play the game too. You type a response out quickly.

i guess i could go...u better make it worth it my while.

After you press send you have to bite your tongue to hold in a laugh. You’re not sure why you’re having so much fun. A small smile makes it to your face and you press the phone to your chest only for it to go off once more.

“I don’t get it,” Donghyuck groans. His breath hits the side of your throat while he rubs his eyes. “He can’t be that interesting.”

Even though he’s not pleased with Yuta’s constant messaging, Donghyuck’s grip on you doesn’t let up. In fact, he tucks his face securely over your shoulder and merely plucks the phone out of your hands.

“Can I read what he sent?”

“I guess,” you mumble.

It’s hard to be annoyed at him when he’s warm and soft behind you from sleep. He hands you the phone so you can unlock it before taking it back and finding the latest message.

“He said, ‘by the end of the party, i promise it will have been worth it. how do you like your toast in the morning?’”

“Oh god. Don’t read it out loud, that makes it so unsexy.”

“That’s because he’s unsexy. Just tell him to fuck off.”

“If you don’t think he’s sexy then don’t fuck him.” He pinches at your sides and you yelp. “Plus, I don’t really have a reason to blow him off so quickly.”

“Uh, yes. Yes, you do.”

“I already told you I don’t care if he’s not the marrying type.”

“T-there are other reasons.”

“What are they?”

There’s a long pause.

“Okay, I can’t think of any right now, but I know they’re there. So just...please. You’re way out of his league, anyway.”

You snort. “Right. I’m not hot enough to get free drinks from people, so if I’m out of his league, what are you?”

From the little spoon position, you can’t see Donghyuck’s cheeks burn in embarrassment. Sophomore year you two had snuck into a bar and a few senior girls sent some drinks to your table after seeing him in a leather jacket. Since then the freebies have only increased now that he’s lost some of his baby face and invested in jeans that fit.

“Besides,” you snatch the phone back. “He’s the only one who seems to find me attractive lately.”

“There are other people who find you attractive.”

There’s a seriousness in his voice that startles you a bit. Donghyuck is a free spirit so there’s not much that makes him mad. But now his voice is a shade more gravelly than normal. When you roll onto your back you see that his brows slant heavy over his eyes. He looks truly upset. And you’re not sure why. It takes you by surprise and it must show on your face, because instantly his eyes go softer and he’s laying back down beside you.

“Even if that’s true, Hyuck, those people aren’t lining up at my door.” Donghyuck mouth purses against the back of your neck in frustration. “At least Yuta is being loud and clear. I can’t fault him for that. Just like I can’t date someone whose feelings I never know.”

“Fair enough.” He sighs finally, his words taking you by surprise. “You sure you don’t like him at least a little bit, though? This seems like a lot for someone you don’t actually care about.”

“No, I have...someone else.”

Donghyuck shoots forward to peer at you with wide eyes. “Who is it?”

“I don’t wanna say.”

“Come on, that’s not fair.”

“If I told you, I would jinx everything.”

He eyes you silently but doesn’t push much more.

“Is Yuta suddenly an option so you can get over this mystery person?”

“Maybe.”

“Then I’ll do my best to help out.”

“What does that mean?” Donghyuck sits up, probably energized by the nap.

“Yuta is the type of guy that wants what he can’t have. So you have to show him that he can’t have you.”

“Okay, I see where you’re going and I honestly kind of like the early 2000’s rom-com vibes. But how do you make someone think you’re taken when you’re single?”

“Leave it to me.”

Leaving things up to Donghyuck harebrained schemes often means that you aren’t in the loop even when you’re technically in the loop.

Yuta and you text on and off during the whole week leading up to the NKT party. Per Donghyuck’s advice, you give short answers and always take longer than an hour to open his selfies after he sends them. When you do respond with a selfie, you’re never alone in them. A picture of you coyly sipping from the straw in your iced coffee with Donghyuck’s shoulder in the background. A picture of your legs while you study in bed with Donghyuck’s hand partially cropped in the left corner. One of them was supposed to be a mirror selfie to show your outfit, but Donghyuck is fully present with a smug grin and a “friendly” arm wrapped around your waist. When your best friend first proposed the idea to you, it sounded like bro code bullshit. But it seemed to work.

While his snap stories remain full of other ‘acquaintances’, Yuta’s messages get a little more lovey dovey the more you ignore him. There’s suddenly a flood of texts telling you he can’t wait to see you and calling you baby. The act seems to be taking a toll on Donghyuck judging by his scowls after every photo you send. But you just can’t help laughing at how petty guys can be.

Friday rolls around and you’re actually debating whether or not you should bring a condom to the party. You obviously don’t know what size Yuta wears, but with the way he’s been talking over text you think maybe the evening might end well. Help-me-get-over-my-best-friend sex can still be good sex, even if it doesn’t help you get over your best friend.

So you take extra time in the shower Friday night, shimmy into something tight, and wait for Donghyuck to arrive at your place so you can leave to the party together. You had wanted to go with your classmate Jennie, since Donghyuck is a bit of a homebody. But that night he wanted to come, saying something about seeing his plan through.

When Donghyuck arrives, you’re taking a swig from one of the tiny nip bottles of vodka that you stashed in your purse. After a mere 5 seconds of having arrived, he takes one look at you and immediately groans.

“Are you sure you don’t want to just stay in? We can order Chicken Haus and watch that new show you put on my DVR. Or I could hire a stripper. I’m sure we could find one that’s way more personable than Yuta.”

“Hyuck, I need to do this. It’ll be good for everyone involved.”

“But why am I part of that everyone?”

“You said you would help me with this. And you’re forgetting that Mila is gonna be there.”

Sadly, it was also too early in the night and you hadn’t drunk nearly enough to be able to tell him that he’s involved because he’s the one you're trying to get over. You empty the first tiny bottle and begin downing the second one as you begin the trek to the NKT house.

“What does Mila have to do with anything?”

“While I’m hopefully...doing my thing, you can be doing yours. With her.”

“Why would I want to sleep with Mila?”

“You don’t want to sleep with Mila?”

“No? Who said I did?”

“Oh.”

Donghyuck scoffs at you like you’re speaking gibberish and passes around you when you stop in your tracks again. When you catch up to him, he swipes the new nip bottle out of your hand and finishes it in one gulp.

***

The party is in full swing when you arrive. You stand in the doorway of the front entrance and take in the scenery. The regular lights have all been switched out for red bulbs. It takes a moment for your eyes to adjust and be able to make out faces properly because the color is so saturated.

The music is booming loud enough for you to feel the bass in your chest and echo across the soles of your feet as you walk across the room. Donghyuck helps you part your way through the crowd of bodies swaying to the music to get to the drinks table. With a cup in your hand and liquid courage going down your throat, you feel a little less nervous. You try to be inconspicuous while you scan the room for Yuta, but you don’t find him.

“I don’t see him,” you shout over the music, “What do you wanna do in the meantime?”

“Go home,” Donghyuck scowls into his cup.

You flip him off for being a wet blanket and finish the contents of your cup. Just as you move for a refill, you happen to find Yuta in the crowd. He’s not alone either. There’s a girl with long red hair in front of him, dancing while he smiles wolfishly. You think you recognize her from one of his instagram posts. Suddenly, you’re not feeling so bold anymore.

“There he is,” you say just loud enough for Donghyuck to catch. Even over the music he can hear the resignation in your voice. He follows your gaze over to the dark corner where the girl now has herself pressed against him.

“Shit.”

“Yeah. Shit.” Donghyuck straightens up.

“It’s not too late, though.”

“How is it not? She’s practically got him in a to-go box.”

“Maybe, but he might just not know you’re here. You can still plant the seed. You know, let him know what he’s missing, at least.”

Donghyuck’s features are now angled in focus. In the red party lights, the serious expression squares off his jaw, sharpens the planes of his face. He looks handsome and he wants to help you even though he hates the guy he’s trying to help you with. You don’t know whether to be angry or feel fond. It’s not like you really want him to help you get with another guy, but the fact that he’s swallowing his own pride to do it shows he cares. He’s a good friend, you muse. And you can’t mess that up just because you caught feelings.

With vodka and spiked punch humming in your veins, you toss your shoulders back and grab your friend’s hand. Making a beeline through the crowd once more, you make sure to end up in a spot that’s directly in Yuta’s eyeline. Donghyuck falls in front of you instinctively, acting as a wall to spy behind. The music changes and you move with it to look natural. Your arms come up to wrap around your friend’s broad shoulders and your body comes up to press against his. Donghyuck looks down at you.

“Sorry,” you plead through the thumping bass of the song, “I know this is weird but I just figured if it looked like—”

“No, I get it. Keep going.”

Then, he’s locking you in with a hand on the small of your back and stepping in time with the beat of the song. You follow suit and as soon as you do, Yuta looks away from his friend for a split second. Your eyes meet, he takes in the scene, and you give him your best teasing grin. Instantly he looks intrigued. His eyes don’t return to the girl in front of him and instead he raises an eyebrow. As if to say ‘I thought you said he wasn’t your boyfriend’. You respond with a coy eye roll but also graze your hands lightly up the column of Donghyuck’s back for effect. You’re so caught up in your act that you forget yourself and go so far as to rake your nails across the nape of his neck. He shivers against you and for a moment you think you’ve crossed a line. But then he’s spinning you around.

Now your back is to Yuta while Donghyuck sizes the older man up. The plan is no longer in your control and you’re nervous.

“What are you doing,” you hiss into his ear.

“I’m just doing my part.”

Donghyuck makes sure Yuta is watching before leaning in and pressing his mouth to yours. Once the initial shock wears off, you freeze up for a different reason. On the one hand, this is what you’ve been waiting for. On the other hand, this isn’t how you had imagined your first kiss with him. You certainly don’t want it to have happened only because he was trying to get some other guy interested in.

The way his lips caress yours softly makes you pliant for a moment. You let your guard down and pull him closer with a sigh. His arms come to wrap around you completely and it feels so real then. It feels like the room is spinning. And then you realize it’s actually spinning as Donghyuck turns you both around just in time to give Yuta a glimpse of your entwined figures.

You don’t see the way the older student frowns lightly while being dragged away by his lady friend. All you see is a reminder that none of this is real. The way Donghyuck hugs you to his chest minutely as you kiss him isn’t real. The sweetness of the way he nudges his nose against you and switches the angle of the kiss isn’t real. The way he murmurs your name briefly against your lips before coming in to kiss you again, hidden from Yuta, is...not real?

You push at him roughly. He stumbles back like he’s drunk even though he drank a fraction of the amount you did.

“Donghyuck”

“Mission accomplished.” He grins at Yuta’s retreating back, passing his hand over his mouth.

“What was that?”

“Huh? Oh, that was just...it was just something to seal the deal.”

“Right.” You look down at your feet. “It was an act.”

“Yeah, no, it wasn’t real.”

He laughs but it comes out airy and broken. You try to laugh too but the sound catches in your mouth and a hitch comes out instead.

“Would it have been that awful if it were real?”

You watch as his jaw drops and he frantically looks anywhere but at you. It’s a trap of a question. A trap for the both you really, but you can’t stop yourself from asking.

“What do you mean? Like if we...if you and I were—”

“Forget it. That would be crazy, I don’t know why I even said that. I’m gonna go get some air.”

“Hey.”

The NKT house is one that you’ve visited a couple times for parties, so you’re lucky in that you know the layout well enough to be able to find a back door quickly. There’s not that many people on the porch that you find, so you don’t feel that bad about nudging some empty hard cider cans out of the way and letting out a pathetic little cry.

The rejection isn’t actually all that hard to take; you’d come to accept that Donghyuck was not for you. You hate the sound of your watery voice as you basically asked him if you had a shot only for him to act like he was being held hostage. The couple who had been making out on the other end of the porch get turned off by the weepy background music you make and head inside.

Sounds of another person walking onto the patio interrupt your crying, but you figure if you just cry louder they’ll be gone soon. When the footsteps get closer and eventually end up to your right, you wipe your nose discreetly and take a step away.

“Rough night?”

Yuta stands next to you with a smile. It’s not quite as sharp as the other times as he looks you over.

“You probably aren’t looking for this right now, but I just want to say you clean up real nice.”

“Gee, thanks.” You smooth a hand over the fabric of your clothes. “What are you doing out here?”

“I came to find you actually. Can’t stop thinking about you lately.”

You scoff. “Where’s your friend from earlier?”

“Her? She’s just a colleague.”

“She looked like she liked you,” you say quietly.

“I guess so. I’ve definitely seen that look before. Maybe that’s what it is.”

“Trust me, I know that look when I see it.”.

“I bet you do.” He pins you with an amused look.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

You cross your arms and turn to him. He chuckles at your sudden annoyance, looking oddly charmed by it.

“Easy, cowgirl.” He lays a relaxed hand on your shoulder, pulling you near. “All I meant was that you must be sick of getting that look from your little ‘not boyfriend’.”

“He’s really not my boyfriend. And he doesn’t—”

“Look, I’m an observant person. I see things. I can read people.” He puts his beer bottle down and uses the now free hand to wipe at the drying tear tracks on your cheeks. “I know when someone’s trying to make me jealous.”

“About that—”

“And I know when someone is head over heels with someone else. And that guy? He’s completely gone.”

“Yuta, I’m sorry about trying to play with your emotions like that. I’m sure you get your fair share of that.”

“Eh, it‘s whatever.” He shrugs. “I will say that you did a good job. It was fun, even if I did get a bit jealous at the end.”

“It wasn’t completely my idea,” you confess.

“I think I kinda knew that.”

You stand in what you think might be companionable silence with Yuta. He takes another swig from his beer while leaving his hand lingering on you. Not in a sleazy way, but perhaps in an attempt at being comforting. Like maybe he’s trying to be a friend.

“So, what’s the deal with your friend?”

“He’s...I think it’s one-sided. I basically confessed out there and his response was kind of bad.”

Yuta turns to lean against the porch railing. You face out into the trees behind NKT house, he faces the house, watching people pass by and stop on the patio.

“What kind of bad?”

“It was like the idea of us together froze him or something. He got so nervous, he started stuttering. I just booked it out of there after that.”

“How do you know it was because he didn’t like the idea? What if he was, like, trying to contain his excitement or something?”

“That would be amazing. But the likelihood of that is insane. I mean, you and him are kind of alike.”

“Excuse me,” Yuta bawks. You laugh a little and pat his arm reassuringly.

“I just mean that you and he are both cool guys.”

“Oh. Thanks.”

“He’s super cool and funny and handsome and...warm? It’s probably just simple math or physics—how can you not love him?”

Yuta hums, eyes still trained on the partygoers passing by the porch entrance. Someone walks by the open frantically, then comes back to stand in the doorframe.

“I don’t know. Maybe you have a word for this since you’re in astronomy but isn’t that just how it works? The planets just gravitate around the sun. It’s not the other way around. He’s the sun and I’m...”

“Pluto?”

“Yeah, actually.”

You laugh because it’s a little sad but it’s perfect for your analogy. Pluto. Not even a real planet, doesn’t really belong with some of the other giants that have moons and rings of their own. But still helplessly circling the sun because the laws of the universe won’t let it go that easily.

“I’ll be right back. Don’t move,” Yuta says after a moment.

“Oh, uh, okay.”

You continue to look out at the backyard. With your eyes having adjusted a long time ago, you enjoy the dark cobalt of the night sky and the ink blot silhouettes of the trees in the forest that runs along the school’s border. The air has grown crisp and without the alcohol blanket covering you, you’re feeling a bit tired and cold.

“Hey, you misplaced this,” Yuta’s voice sounds again as he ambles back onto the porch. He hands you your bag and phone.

“Crap, you’re a lifesaver.” Oddly enough, you don’t really remember putting them down, but you suppose it was the chaos of the party that blurred the memory.

“I think I have to head out,” you say finally. “It’s clear that my head’s not really in the right place to stay out much later.”

“I get that.” Yuta leans forward and places a soft kiss on your cheek. “But I think I might actually have something related to this in some of my old notes. I’ll send it to you.”

“Oh, okay. Yeah, sure.”

Yuta waits around in a surprisingly gentlemanly fashion while you send an awkward text to Donghyuck saying that you’re catching a shared ride back to your dorm and that he doesn’t have to wait up for you.

The following day, you wake up to a knock on your door. Your head is pounding from dehydration and a too-late bedtime the previous night, but you still hobble to the door of your bedroom to see what the commotion is.

“Here.” Your roommate places a stapled book of pages into your hand. “Donghyuck came by to drop this off. He said some guy named Yuta gave it to him and that you would know what it was.”

“Oh-kay,” you yawn and blink down at the paper.

There’s a section highlighted in red on the lined paper. It says BINARY SYSTEMS in neat penmanship. You vaguely remember Yuta mentioning sending you some notes, so you put it at the foot of your bed and plan to read it when you’re more awake.

“You up for brunch tomorrow,” you follow her into the main room and find an overnight bag on the couch.

“Can’t. I’m going to visit my parents tomorrow since my Monday classes got cancelled.”

“Lucky you.”

“We can do next week though.”

“Yeah sure.”

***

Later that Sunday, when you’re stuck in a procrastination loop with your own work, you remember Yuta’s notes. You try to make some sense of them but even with coffee and an afternoon nap, it’s still too jargon-filled to bring any sense to you. So you do the next best thing and type the heading of his notes into an online encyclopedia. The first sentence for the page reads:

A binary system is a system of two astronomical bodies which are close enough that their gravitational attraction causes them to orbit each other...

You don’t really know what Yuta thought you would get from reading this. Maybe he just thought that you would be interested because you made an astronomy analogy. You pull out your phone, about to text Yuta for an explanation, when your phone rings. It’s Donghyuck.

“Hello?” You try to keep your voice neutral, free of embarrassment.

“Hey, where are you?”

“I’m actually just in my dorm.”

“I just saw Daisy. Is she—”

“She’s going home for a few days.”

“Cool. Can I...come up?”

“Yeah. Of course, yeah. I’ll be here.”

You hang up the phone and as soon as you enter the common room, there’s a knock on the door.

“That was fast, you must have—Are you okay?”

There’s dark bruises underneath Donghyuck’s eyes, a sign that he didn’t get much sleep the night before. He smiles self-deprecatingly and holds the door frame for support while taking off his shoes. You note that they’re his shower slides. He’s either more tired than you realize or he was in a hurry to get here. In his hand he holds a cardboard tray carrying two recyclable cups, one filled to the brim with whipped cream like you always ask for.

“I was looking for you,” he blurts. “Friday night. I was looking for you after you ran away.”

“Okay.”

“I was looking for you because as soon as I kissed you I knew I fucked up. But,” he puts his hands up, “not in the way you think.”

“I think I need to sit down for this conversation.”

“I—yeah, okay.”

Donghyuck follows behind you as you migrate to your breakfast table. He looks even more exhausted in the fluorescent lighting hanging above the table. He hands you your cup, and you eat some of the whipped topping thoughtfully.

“How’d you pay for this? Didn’t you say you had a negative balance?”

“I find a way,” he chuckles.

“What were you saying before?”

“I figured you wouldn’t really want to talk to me, but you left your bag and stuff with me, so I was gonna just give it back to you and then give you space, but then I saw you on the porch. With Yuta.”

“Yeah. He came and found me actually. We had a really strange conversation.”

“I know. I heard most of it.”

“Oh. Then you probably know how I feel.”

“Yeah.” He ducks his head to play with the cardboard sleeve sitting around his own cup. “Did you read Yuta’s notes? I gave them to Daisy before she left. She said she’d give them to you.”

“Yeah, I did.”

“And did you...get it?”

“Not really. I think he was just trying to convert me to astronomy”

“Well, after you guys talked, he took your purse from me. And he said he’d send me the notes too. So I read them. And then I didn’t get it so I read more, and then I thought about it and I think I got it.”

“What is it?”

“It’s you and me.”

“How is it you and me?”

“I mean, you kept talking about how I’m like the sun and you’re like Pluto. But we’re something else. It’s not you revolving around me or me revolving around you. We circle each other.”

“So, that means...”

You think back to the discussion you had with Yuta on the back porch of the NKT frat house and it starts to click into place. If hand-holding and back scratches and buying him lunch was your revolution, buying you coffee when he was broke, watching you pretend to do homework, and helping you bag another guy for your own happiness was his. Somehow you had missed so many little things because you were blinded by his light. But now, you could see clearly. Donghyuck wasn’t the sun and you were not Pluto. You were binary stars.

“Hyuck,” you whisper because your throat is suddenly tight.

You get up from your seat, nearly toppling your chair over as you make your way around the table. He opens his arms to meet you halfway and you pull his head to your stomach. Bending at the waist, you press a kiss to the top of his head. He buries his face into the fabric of your shirt and breathes out a deep sigh.

“I love you,” his voice is muffled.

“I love you too.” When he smiles up at you, you take notice of the dark circles under his eyes again. “Have you not been sleeping?”

“I spent a lot of time overthinking everything since Friday night. I kind of haven’t gone to bed since then.”

“You have to take better care of yourself.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“No, come take a nap.”

He lets you tug him to your room where your bed lays freshly made. You turn the blankets over and gesture for him to get in. He slides in to the wall and then turns to pat the free space beside him.

“Get in.”

“I’m not tired. I slept like a baby these last two days actually.”

His mouth drops open. “How? I felt like I had to read every article about brown giants just to get here.”

“Yeah, see, I didn’t do that.”

“I probably know more than Yuta by now, honestly.”

“You know,” you finally surrender to his annoying patting of the mattress and sit, “He’s not as bad as you made him seem. I actually really liked the vibe while I was talking to him.”

“Why would you tell me that while you get into bed with me?”

You pat his cheek. “I’m just wondering now if maybe some of your attitude towards him was for show.”

“It might have been. But I was feeling desperate.”

“I’ll forgive you if you just go to sleep.”

“I’m too awake to go to sleep.”

“Well, I don’t want to go out and do something just for you to fall asleep like someone’s dad at a baseball game.”

“I don’t do that.”

“You definitely do that.”

You reach a hand out to stroke his hair, making sure to graze the hair at the back of his neck. He freezes up and at first you think it’s just the area being ticklish for him. So you ignore it and continue. But he freezes up again.

“Okay, if you want me to sleep stop doing that.”

“What are you talking about—Oh.” Just as you were pulling your fingers away, you feel something press against your hip. Your eyes grow wide and he buries his face in your neck.

“Sorry, sorry. Don’t worry about me. I’ll go to sleep.”

It’s not the first time you’ve been in this situation. A fair number of times you’ve woken up first after falling asleep in front of the TV, wrapped up in him wherever you slept only to realize that he was still dreaming about ‘nice things’. Sometimes you were able to pretend you were still asleep and he’d quietly disentangle himself before going to sit in your living room until you ‘woke up’ for a second time. Other times, he’d wake up right after you and he’d say the same thing every time. ‘It’s just a reflex’.

“Just a reflex,” you ask because you're not really sure what to do.

“If you want.” He picks his head up then.

“If it’s not just a reflex, what then?”

You inch your hand under the covers at the same time that he props himself up on an elbow, pulling you closer. The sliding sound of clothes seems extra loud in the confines of your room and it makes your face feel hot. His hand appears near the hem of your shirt, grazing the sliver of exposed skin gently enough to make your breath hitch a little.

“Then we can just see where we end up.”

[giorno-plays-piano]

Playing games Pairing: dark!Sebastian Stan x Reader Warning: yandere, swearing, some non-con implications towards the end. Words: 2069. P.S. JESUS CHRIST WHAT HAVE I DONE I AM A TERRIBLE PERSON I HOPE NO ONE WHO REALLY MET SEBASTIAN GONNA READ THIS ghjdfyjdfds I’m so sorry guys _____________________________________ “I asked for a vanilla latte with extra milk, not caramel cappuccino.”

You rolled your eyes at his irritated remark. You knew Sebastian wasn’t in his best mood this morning and expected him to make your day nastier just because he felt like it.

“Sorry, but I’m sure it was caramel cappuccino. You asked for some cinnamon on the top, remember?”

“No, I didn’t.” He snarled and looked at you, giving a mocha frappe to Jill, his hair artist. “I asked for a vanilla latte. If you suffer from memory loss, you’d better visit your doctor once we get back to US.”

What an asshole. Mary, who was now applying some makeup on Sebastian’s face with her beauty blenders and brushes, bit down on her lip: she had been watching how he treated you for the last 3 weeks, and it was a living nightmare. It was very odd since Sebastian was on good terms with pretty much everyone around, but you were always an exception. Why? Neither Mary nor Jill could tell. There was nothing revolting in the way you behaved around Mr. Stan, simply doing your job as his assistant. You were getting him coffee every morning, buying some personal stuff for him, managing his meetings… but you were more an errand girl, that’s true. It was surprising for most of the other people surrounding you two, but you didn’t object to your tasks. You were furious because of the way Sebastian treated you.

He was mean, unfair, irritating, and rude. You didn’t deserve it.

“Well, my voice recorder tells I got everything right.” You pulled it from the pocket of your below-knee sheath skirt, ready to press the button.

“What the fuck is that?” The man rose to his feet immediately, almost pushing frozen Mary out of his way and stepping towards you. “How many times do I have to tell you? NO. FUCKING. RECORDERS.”

He was ready to snatch it from your hands, yet you were able dodge him right on time, hiding the recorder in your pocket again.

“Ok, ok, I’m sorry, I’ll put it away!” In a second you were behind Jill’s tall figure as if you were a child hiding from a bad-tempered parent, Sebastian watching you with anger in his cold blue eyes. “I’m not going to use it. But it’s still true, you asked for caramel cappuccino.”

“Guess what? I don’t fucking care.” He growled in a low voice. “You’ll go and get me vanilla latte because it’s your goddamn job. And I want my coffee before Jill’s finished with my hair, understood?”

Watching his with clear disdain on your face, you cursed under your breath. It was freaking hot in Prague where Sebastian was filming now and getting out the second time just to run to Starbucks once more would sure ruin both your makeup and a white blouse you had been wearing. Damn it.

“God, why do you have to be such a bastard most of the time?” You snapped at him, visibly shaking with fury. “What the hell is wrong with you? Are you a closet psycho or what?”

“I’m the one who pays you, honey.” He smiled at you the same way he always did it in front of the camera and you felt sick.

You stormed off the room without having a glance back at his perfect white teeth. Sebastian Stan was the worst person you had ever met, and you were working for him, seeing him every day and listening to his orders as if you were his pet. How did it come to this? Why did he look like the most perfect human being to you six months ago? What made him behave like that to you when in reality it was him who offered you a job?

God, it was all messed up. You did not remember when things got so bad you could yell at each other in a full voice. It was actually surprising, someone like you shouting and swearing at one of the world’s most famous actors, but it was something Sebastian let you do. Like he wanted you to scream at him regardless who surrounded you whether it was his makeup artists, agents, cleaning ladies or anyone else. It was like he got off on it.

True, this job payed well, much better than the one you had before. Moreover, in these 6 months you saw more countries than you did in your entire life, travelling with Sebastian everywhere and meeting tons of new people, many of them being great professionals. It was inspiring; it made you dream of all the things you thought were impossible; it made you curious and gave you a chance to practice your networking skills.

But Sebastian was fucking blowing it. After six months of constant everyday battles filled with rage and pure hatred you had gained weight, 10 pounds to be precise. Now you were having problems to sleep, and you knew it wasn’t the jet lag.

Anyway, you spent the whole day running around the city to buy him this or that. In the evening you were so tired you could barely move your legs while Sebastian was clearly pleased seeing you like that. It probably stroked his enormous ego.

Fuck it. You didn’t deserve a minute of it. You were not going to let him ruin you for fun, just because he could it since he payed you. Why did you spend you precious time trying to please him? Sure, you still considered him one of the best actors on the planet, but the things he did to you were not ok. He wasn’t ok. Maybe he really was a psycho or had some disorder he didn’t want to treat, you had no idea. But you knew it couldn’t continue like that. It was too much.

You spent an hour writing an email and asking to be laid off. It was just a few lines, simple and professional, yet you were constantly adding and then erasing new sentences. You shouldn’t make it personal, you thought to yourself. You doubted you could leave on agreeable terms, but you needed to give it a try. Even if your last argument with Mr. Stan might be the worst of them all, it would be your last one. It was worth it.

Sighing, you decided to take a stroll before going to bed. 15 minutes wouldn’t hurt, right? You’d have some fresh air and enjoy the view of Prague’s Powder Gate – you were lucky to stay right in the center of this magnificent old city. You could make some more photos to show your friends once you return back home. It was also nice to just sit on a bench and look at the night sky full of stars.

Maybe then you wouldn’t feel so guilty for leaving Sebastian and your team.

In the end, it took you way more that 15 minutes, but your late-night walk made your thoughts clear and left no regrets about your choice. What was happening between you and Sebastian wasn’t right, and you could do nothing but leave. With so many people wishing to work for him he would get another assistant in a matter of hours, and you would get your life back. Those money you earned would keep you afloat quiet some time even if you wouldn’t be able to get a job right away.

“What is this, Y/N?”

His voice almost made you jump. Sebastian stood up from the chair in the corner of your room once you put on the lights. What the Hell was he doing here so late? How did he open the door? If he needed anything, he could simply give you a call.

Oh. You saw your little black recorder in his hand.

“I told you I won’t use it anymore.” Your jaw clenched.

“I’m not talking about this piece of shit.”

He tossed your recorder on your bed as if he couldn’t care less and moved towards you so fast you had no time to step back.

“What is this pathetic email you wrote?” Sebastian’s handsome face darkened. “Are you not right in the head? You want to leave?”

“Yes, I do. What’s wrong with that?” Your expression hardened. He dared to touch your laptop when you weren’t there. “I thought you’d be glad to know. Today you told me three times I didn’t deserve working for you, correct?”

“You know perfectly well I wasn’t serious.”

“God, I have a hard time telling when you’re serious since all you do is hating me.”

He sent you an icy glare.

“You know I don’t hate you. You just happen to bring the worst in me, dear.”

There he was again. God, were you going to have this argument right now when you were deadly tired? You hoped it could wait till tomorrow, but it was clearly not your luckiest day.

“If you want to blame me again, it’s ok. I’m the worst one. I’m a bad person and a terrible assistant.” You squeezed your eyes shut and sighed again, scratching your forehead. “I get it. What I don’t get is why you aren’t happy I’m leaving.”

“Because I don’t want you to leave. If I really hated you so much, I’d already found another assistant, but I don’t want that.”

“Listen, let’s stop playing our games just for a few minutes.” This conversation made you feel even more exhausted. “We don’t get along. You don’t like me. Why do we torment each other? I don’t even remember the last time we had a regular conversation without shouting and cursing.”

“I’m not playing games with you, dear. You do.” He had already cornered you, his face determined and somewhat unsettling. “What do you want? A raise? More benefits?”

You were ready to yell at him again.

“Did you listen to what I just said? I want to leave. I want to come home and forget about all our horrible fights. I want to have a steady and boring job back in US. Do you understand?”

“NO, I DON’T!” The man screamed at you again, and now you suddenly felt his arms clenching your shoulders painfully and winced from his touch. “I already told you to stop toying with me! After all this shameless flirting and batting your eyes you wanna tell me you’re leaving? Do you think I’m so stupid to believe in this bullshit?”

It took you a few seconds to process his words. What? Flirting? Well, you did consider him handsome and charming, who on Earth didn’t, but you had never pulled anything like that. At first, it was because of your professionalism, and then your relationships escalated so fast you knew that he hated you and you hated him. What Sebastian had been even talking about?

You felt very aware how close he was once you felt his heavy breath on your face. He never did this before.

“Listen, I don’t know what you’re talking about, but I want to leave. That’s all.” You tried pushing him back with your hands against his chest. “Please, let me go. I need to… t-to go to the kitchen.”

“You’re going nowhere, dear.” His expression darkened. “Tell me the truth. You don’t want me to treat you like my assistant? I get it, I get it, it’s fine. I can treat you like my girl in front of everyone if that’s what you want.”

“No! I – “

His put his hand on your mouth immediately, leaning in closer.

“It’s ok, I understand. I grew tired of pretending like nothing happens between us, too. You want me to let everyone now? It’s ok. I’ll post our photo on Instagram tomorrow. Is this what you want? Is this what you want?”

You tried to scream, but his grip on you was too strong as if Sebastian was really some kind of super soldier. Desperately trying to wriggle free you only got him to hold you tighter, his soft lips all over your face already wet with tears.

“It’s ok, dear. I got it.” He shushed you, trying to keep your arms together with his hand and pushing his knee in between your legs. “I’m sorry it took me so long. I understand now, so you don’t have to go. You won’t go, will you?”

You couldn’t answer him even if you wanted to.

[anunvalidcritic]

The Boys: SN2.7

(DISCLAIMER: MY OPINION IS MY OWN AND CAN BE DEEMED INVALID TO THOSE WHO DON’T CARE FOR IT.) 

Sorry for the delay but I’ve been really busy with work and I haven’t gotten much sleep due to this but nonetheless I was able to finish it and upload the commentary.

               BUTCHER, BAKER, CANDLESTICK MAKER

(Photo Credit: @01091006)

Alright we’ve got ourselves a grown ass man whose clearly obsessed with STORMFRONT

Ik he’s gettin’ tired of seeing/doing the same shit over and over again

Maybe he’s one of the meme makers

Yep called that shit again

He better not become some fucking murder... smdh

“Congress?? Please what a bunch of corrupt cunts they are.” - BUTCHER

(this line hit a little too close to home iykyk)

This congresswoman looks familiar... I can’t put my finger on it though

Alright so whose that ringing BUTCHER’s line?? (That’s a long ass number too)

“Mom I don’t want a fucking unicorn frappe.” - ANNIE

Bro wtf?!!!!!

“And Serge... no abandoning your post this time.” - MALLORY

rip to BUTCHER’s father

BLACK NOIR didn’t have to go in on ANNIE like that

ICONIC DIALOGUE

LAMPLIGHTER - “Okay. Different strokes, man.”

HUGHIE - “Please don’t say that in this context.”

“You know this isn’t healthy, man. Y-You can’t watch porn while the... sun’s out.”- HUGHIE

LAMPLIGHTER = ARSONIST

I like how HUGHIE said “nevermind” just to continue with his story.

LOL THAT TRANSITION BETWEEN HOMELANDER TALKING ABOUT ANNIE AND HUGHIE LOOKING AT THE SCREEN IS PURE GOLD

“Come on do you want me to cuck? Or be the guy who fucks the wife?” - HUGHIE

“Yeah, come on. Let’s go fuck the wife. Con-sensually.” - HUGHIE

You know I never truly understood why the nickname “Billy” went with the name William.

ICONIC DIALOGUE

SAM - “What, no hug?”

BUTCHER - “You step one inch closer, and I’ll kill you quicker than that fucking arse cancer.”

SAM - “I bet you would.”

ROFL The way he slapped his finger away

Beating the shit out of your kids does not equal “tough love”

Sooo.... LENNY committed suicide...

Wow, well I’ll be damned tha nazi bitch has a heart

I haven’t seen MAEVE use her powers in a minute!! That poor table.

Wait why is DR. VOGELBAUM in a wheelchair??? Ig HOMELANDER really did fuck his ass up.

Wow I really forgot M.M’s gov name is MARVIN.

FRENCHIE reminiscin’ -- You know i still remember when FRENCHIE said his dad smothered him with a hello kitty duvet lol

Watch me fuck around and learn KIMIKO’s sign language

Fish Bowl = Fixing Grievances

Bruh this whole church is toxic

“And boom, bitchies!” - LAMPLIGHTER

“Your America’s second favorite lesbian couple, after all.” - ASHLEY

Whose the first?... Ellen and Portia??

“Ashley for once in your life be a fucking human being.” - MAEVE

Their watching a lego movie of the Blindside

... I think we all know HOMELANDER is lying to BECCA. He’s gonna snatch that little boy up in the middle of the night.

BUTCHER a whole maniac

Why do I feel like LAMPLIGHTER is gonna step HUGHIE up...

👀...

HUGHIE RUN!!!

My mouth is really ajar looking at this hand scene

She’s walking a little too slow for me... I foresaw that shit!

BLACK NOIR is strong af! Jesus he’s throwing her around like a dog that vigorously shakes its head with a toy in its mouth.

STARLIGHT bro I’m gonna need you to get the fuck up! Don’t let this dude choke you out!

... once again... fuck almond joy’s

Y’all can do this reunion shit later. GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE BUILDING!

ICONIC DIALOGUE

M. M. - “Kid, you are fucking unbelievable. All you had to do was watch porn.”

HUGHIE - “I didn’t know he was gonna set himself on fire?!?.”

I think we all knew this church for supes was all kinds of fucked up. But this whole scenario of EAGLE hunting his partner dressed up as a deer is on the stranger side to things. 

Why tf did ANNIE’s mom look at KIMIKO like that?!?!

HOMELANDER lookin’ sick af!

BRUH IS THAT FUCKING CINDY!!!!????

“Oh, shit.” - THE DEEP

_______________

episode 6 here. Once again I’m sorry for the delay in the post. I’ll have to figure out my timing better. But on a lighter note... EPISODE 8 WILL BE THE LAST FOR THE SEASON!!! We already know it got confirmed for a season 3 so this last episode better fucking bring it!

[maatryoshkaa]

young god | chapter 10

chapters: | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11| 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | epilogue |

word count: 3.9k

warnings: 

description: finding momentary refuge in a cafe across town, Han Jisung is holding onto his facade by a thread, and a talk with Detective Bang Chan -- and Police Captain Kim Woojin -- leaves him more shaken than ever before. Things have changed, time is running out, and a sudden turn of events leads Jisung all the way back to your doorstep.

watch the trailer here!

10| dead end

Han Jisung sat facing the windows of a cafe whose name he neither remembered nor cared for, absently stirring a cup of coffee that had gone cold an hour ago.

From the moment he’d stepped out of your apartment, his feet hadn’t stopped propelling him in the opposite direction, actively putting as much distance between him and you as possible. This coffee shop -- the Third Eye, or something along those lines -- was far enough on the other side of town for Jisung to walk in, order the first thing on the menu, and plant himself down by the window seats.

If only he could get you out of his mind.

Every time he blinked, he saw the silhouette of your fearful, blood-drained face burning into his eyelids -- the warm laughter that had been stirred in his chest from making pancakes now felt like an ice burn, leaving his rib cage aching, raw, and cold. 

Lies, lies, lies.

That’s all they were, really: those tender, precious moments didn’t belong to him, not really. No, he scowled -- they were stolen, they belonged to who he was supposed to be. Who you thought he was, who you wanted him to be. After all, there was no way you would still love him if you knew who he really was. He saw it in your faltering smiles, the nervous laughter filling the cracks in your conversations; he heard it when you called him that night, voice impossibly small and begging him to stay safe from the -- the killer.

To stay safe from himself.

Jisung let his head fall in his hands, fingers violently raking through his hair as he stared blankly through the window. How long was he going to keep this up? No -- how long could he keep this up? He was on bought time, and every stupid slip-up he made was a sufficiently painful reminder of this bitter truth. The memory of the middle-aged man, his rough grey hands and milky-white pupils, made the hair at the back of Jisung’s neck stand up. Somewhere, shambling through the streets of the town, his last victim was still alive.

And one living witness, Jisung thought, was one too much. 

The cafe was fairly busy, but Jisung could still hear the incessant ticking of the clock on the wall. It made his skin crawl. It was a constant reminder that his time with you was running out -- and that no matter how hard he tried, how much he wanted his own facade to be real, it was too late. 

Too much damage had already been done.

“Who’d you kill, Han Jisung?” Chan’s familiar voice nearly sent Jisung falling from his chair, his flailing arms knocking the coffee cup precariously close to the edge of the table. He looked up at the stern-eyed detective in utter shock, mouth falling slack like a fish out of water. Kill? Chan couldn’t know, could he? But then again, the lockdown--

Before Jisung could will his mouth to move again, the detective broke into his signature wide grin, clapping the younger boy on the back. “The look on your face, mate—you look like you’ve just murdered someone and can’t figure out where to bury the body. Loosen up.” Chan was laughing, and Jisung finally unfroze, a wave of relief making his entire body go weak. Chan held out a cup of something with a dollop of cream on top, motioning for Jisung to take it. It was warm in Jisung’s hands, and when he sipped it shakily, the thick, sweet taste of caramel flooded onto his tongue. “What’s this?”

Chan clicked his tongue, shaking his head at the cold cup of coffee Jisung had left untouched. “Caramel frappe. Since when have you drunk coffee? You’ve always had a bigger sweet tooth than most little kids.” Coming from anyone else, the words might have sounded condescending, but the detective’s tone was warm and fond — almost fatherlike. He took a swig of Jisung’s bitter drink instead, studying the younger’s expression with a look of concern. “What’s bothering you?”

Jisung’s mind raced. What was bothering him? Why did his head pound, his chest feel unbearably tight; why did he feel so...sad? 

He glanced at Chan, whose eyebrows were still raised slightly, eyes blinking in confusion.

Why did everyone look at him like that? Like he was a puzzle they could never figure out, no matter how hard they tried.

“Ah, that look. I know.” Chan broke the long silence right before it got stifling, snapping his fingers with the comical flourish of a character in a sitcom. “It’s written all over you face.” He leaned in closer to Jisung, dark eyes glittering with mischief. “Which pretty girl stole Han Jisung’s heart, hm? Go on, tell Detective Bang—he’s seen them all. A cute freshman? Or another hot health sci major?” When Jisung only gave a halfhearted smile, Chan’s teasing expression softened. “Ah,” he breathed, leaning back and nodding sagely. “Y/N?”

Jisung turned away, wincing. The sound of your name made his ears ring. He felt the detective chuckle and sit down next to him, warm eyes studying the younger boy worriedly. “Relationship problems?”

“No, it’s--it’s a me problem,” Jisung mumbled, fingers anxiously tapping the frappe cup. “I keep having these headaches, and I just—I don’t know. I’ve never felt like this before.”

Pushing the coffee aside and humming in thought, Chan asked gently, “Felt like what?”

Jisung gestured vaguely before giving up and propping his head up with both hands. “Like—like I’ve become someone else? Every time I see her, my mind goes...blank. When she smiles, when she talks, I get all nervous, and whenever I’m with her, I—” he caught himself, the words ringing in his head. Whenever I’m with her, I start to remember everything. “Just—I don’t know, Chan.”

Chan gave a low whistle. “That’s love, mate.” He chuckled. “You’re serious about this one, aren’t you?”

“I don’t deserve her.” The words came tumbling from Jisung’s lips before he could stop them, and he cursed himself silently. “She could do so much better, I’m not--”

“Everyone deserves to be loved,” Chan interrupted slowly, and his sudden, soft tone made Jisung turn to look at him in surprise. The detective’s eyes were slightly narrowed, focused on the younger boy’s face. He looked like was examining a case file, Jisung realised — as if Chan had already sensed that there was something deeper, beyond what Jisung was telling him. Still, something in his expression remained unmistakably brotherlike; there was something about Chan that always seemed so comforting: his crinkling, droopy eyes, maybe, or the unfailingly kind smile on his lips.

If Chan noticed Jisung’s sudden loss of words, the detective didn’t mention it. “Everyone deserves to be loved, and you’re no different. There isn’t much that’ll change that — not a few mistakes, not a few imperfections…” Chan paused, as if thinking, then added, “And not a few of Hwang Hyunjin’s comments. You’re a good kid, Han Jisung, even if you don’t believe it yourself.”

Jisung looked away, a painful lump in his throat. Something ached in his chest, like an old wound left to fester — too familiar, too dangerous. “How do you know that?” He asked in a small voice.

He saw Chan smile faintly out of the corner of his eye. “Intuition?” The detective laughed. “I’ve known you since high school, ‘sung. You don’t open up a lot, granted — but deep down, you’ve got a good heart. Y/N’s lucky to have you, and you’re lucky to have her. So why this, all of a sudden?”

Before Jisung could reply, something caught his eye. On the other side of the window, a stone’s throw down the street, was a woman and her young son. The mother’s face was alight with amusement, the toddler teetering a few steps before his father swept him up into his arms. The little boy shrieked with laughter — laughter that Jisung couldn’t hear from the other side of the glass — as his father lifted him onto his shoulders.

“What’s wrong?” Chan’s eyes followed his gaze. The boy’s hands were held above his head triumphantly, like a king on his trusty steed, his father holding onto his legs firmly. Jisung slowly shook his head, staring after them. Something unpleasant burned in his chest — like poison, or a lost memory.

“They...look happy.”

The words seemed to hang in the air. Chan looked at him sideways for a long moment before he finally said, “You and Minho...grew up in the children’s home, right?”

Jisung gave a small nod. Around them, the shop was abuzz with the conversations of customers and the bustle of baristas making drinks, but it all sounded as if he were underwater—slipping further and further away with every tick of the clock on the wall. A sudden nudge to his shoulder made him jolt, and he looked up to see Chan grinning again, arms held open. 

“Hey, now, no more moping. Here—how’s about I pick you up?”

Jisung’s mouth dropped open and the blond detective burst out laughing. Jisung felt his own smile tug involuntarily at his lips, the tension in his chest lightening slightly. 

“Tell you what,” Chan continued, his tone serious but his eyes sparkling with playfulness, “I might not be able to carry you on my shoulders, but I have been told that I give some sick piggyback rides.”

As if on cue, the cafe’s doors swung open, a familiar man in black police gear making his way towards the counter. “Woojin!” Chan called out, waving him over. “Ah—Woojin can definitely pick you up,” he told Jisung, “he’s got more gains than me, I’m afraid. Police Captain Kim Woojin!”

A couple of heads turned in their direction and the older man shot Chan a look. “I didn’t expect to see you here. What are you two up to?”

Chan cleared his throat. “I have important orders for you. Captain Kim Woojin, would you please carry Jisung on your shoulders?”

Jisung opened his mouth to protest, expecting the stoic police chief to sigh deeply and walk back to the counter. Instead, Woojin’s questioning eyes flickered outside the window, where the toddler was still clinging to his father—and the next thing Jisung knew, the police chief’s arms hoisted him up onto his own back. Yelping, Jisung immediately tensed and flailed his arms before clinging onto Woojin for dear life. The police chief was laughing, he realised with a jolt— and Chan, too. Jisung felt his own incredulous smile form on his face, a tentative laugh breaking the tension in his chest. Woojin had always seemed like Chan’s polar opposite— stern and austere, what with his leading the police force with an iron grip— but in this moment, he looked younger, more boyish. Jisung could see how they had become such good friends in the first place.

Woojin carefully let Jisung slide down from his shoulders and back onto the ground, turning around to place a hand on the younger’s shoulder. As his warm, concerned eyes flickered across his face, Jisung felt a bittersweet feeling flare across his chest. “You okay, kid?” 

He brought himself to nod, the smile feeling stiffer than a mask on his face. “Th-thanks. I’ve got to get going— my next class starts in twenty.” He felt both their eyes on him as he swung his bag over his shoulder, Woojin nodding before migrating back to the counter to order his coffee. Jisung waved at Chan, throwing on the most convincing smile he could muster, but just as he turned and pushed the cafe doors open, he felt the detective’s hand clasping his shoulder.

With a pounding heartbeat that had leapt to his throat, Jisung turned to face Chan, the detective’s eyes darkened and serious. After a long moment, Chan finally said softly, “You know I’m here for you, right, ‘sung? Anything bothering you at all, you talk to me or Woojin anytime. We’re still high school friends before detectives or police.”

Stunned, Jisung could only give a jerking nod again before stumbling out of the cafe doors, breaking into a brisk walk. He could feel the detective’s eyes boring into his back before he turned the corner, fingers shaking. What was it about Bang Chan, or even Kim Woojin, that made his chest ache? The warm, genuinely concerned eyes, the firm yet gentle words — it was almost fatherlike.

Well.

Was that what fathers were like? Jisung wasn’t too sure. 

He wouldn’t know; his father had never been like that.

Jisung’s fingers reached into his back pocket, fishing for his phone—and frowned when he found them both empty. Patting all his pockets frantically, his head spun, trying to remember where he could have left it— the cafe? A class?— before it dawned on him.

He’d left his phone on your couch.

Cursing, Jisung paced back and forth—he had gotten up and left so suddenly; he could still imagine your hurt and confused face behind his eyelids. Still, it had been a couple of hours— nearing dinnertime. He nodded slowly— you wouldn’t suspect a thing. He’d apologize and leave, and both of you would pretend that this morning had never happened. Everything would go back to normal.

Right?

Feeling uneasy, he turned on his heel and headed for your apartment.

────────

Your fingers hovered above your phone the same way they had on your first blind date, although your heart was pounding for an entirely different reason now. 

Why? Had been the first word you’d managed to punch out, before shaking your head and frantically deleting it. 

Who are you? Had been the second, which you had erased just as promptly. Now, the white screen was burning into your eyes, your head spinning with questions but your fingers unable to form the right ones.

Taking a shaky breath, you carefully typed a third message.

You: You forgot your phone at my place, so I returned it to your dorm. When you see this, please call me. I|

You felt a wave of hysteria bubble in your throat and you shoved it back down.

You: I need to talk to you about something.

Send.

Stay calm. Stay calm. The ground seemed to be shifting beneath you, threatening to cave in at any moment now—from the therapy session to Jisung’s dorms, from the record shop all the way to the rooftop of the hospital. The moment you had slammed the door to Minho’s office, your legs hadn’t stopped propelling you far, far away from the hospital building. Only when you were back in your apartment again did they finally give way and you hit the ground, back sliding against your front door as you buried your face in your hands.

You were going to stay calm. There were so many possibilities—that’s right, you had always been taught that there were variables to every case study, different perspectives and hidden circumstances—you couldn’t immediately assume the worst, right? Your mind babbled on and on—Jeongin, Minho, murderer, murderers—until you felt like banging your head against the wall just to make the torrent of thoughts stop. 

The curtains were drawn, casting grey shadows over your entire apartment. You were still gripping Jeongin’s cassette tape—the tape with his voice on it—in your hand. You were about to conjure up the strength to drag yourself into the living room and attempt to clear your thoughts when the doorbell rang, the sudden, high-pitched sound piercing through your chest like a gunshot. For a moment you stayed rooted in place, head stiffly turning to face the door.

Standing shakily, your fingers slipped around the doorknob. They fumbled for several moments before you finally managed to pull the door open, and you nearly slammed it back shut when you found yourself face-to-face with Han Jisung.

“Hey,” he said, voice as soft as it had ever been, smooth and sweet as honey. Your fingers tightened their grip around the doorknob, but a small breath betrayed your lips, the smallest sigh of relief. A part of you still clinging onto the possibility that this wasn’t happening, that something, somewhere along the way had been misunderstood, and that was what kept you from tearing your eyes away from his face, from pushing him away and locking the door.

“You...did you get my text?” Your voice cracked slightly, raw from disuse, and you quickly cleared your throat. Jisung blinked at you, puzzled.

“I...no, I don’t have my phone. I thought I’d left it here, but I—I guess I probably left it in class—”

“You did leave it here,” you interrupted, and Jisung, who had begun turning to leave, jerked his head back. “You left it, and I returned it to your dorm.”

His face grew unfathomable, like a cloud passing over a sunny pasture, darkened eyes studying your face. “Thank...you,” he finally managed. One of his hands raised slightly, as if meaning to touch the side of your face, but stopped when you flinched away. “I—I’ll get going, then, I...” He trailed off suddenly, eyes falling on the tapes you were holding.

You could feel your fingers trembling violently and clenched them, the plastic grooves in the tape digging into your palms, and you forced yourself to lift your gaze to Jisung’s face. Voice barely above a whisper, you asked, “What were you doing that night?”

He didn’t need to ask what night you were talking about. Instead, his dark eyes were cast to the floorboards as he replied without missing a beat, “I was in my dorm, studying for finals.”

Your heart twisted as if someone had plunged a knife into your chest. For what seemed like an eternity, all you could hear was your own short, ragged breathing and heartbeat thudding in your ears, louder and louder and infinitely louder until the words that had been clawing away in your throat and what was left of your composure finally burst. 

“Then why—” you tried to steady yourself, but your breath caught in your throat, all rational thought, all previous reason disintegrating, the world as you knew it crashing to pieces at your feet. The words were tumbling from your mouth now, like beads falling from a snapped necklace. “Why is your voice on Jeongin’s tape? Why is there blood on the shirt you were wearing yesterday, why did you lie about your limp, why are your hands always bruised or cut and w-why do you always smell like smoke a-and g-gasoline—”

Jisung took a step forward, hands outstretched again—it was almost like it was instinctive, as if his first impulse was to pull you into his arms, to wipe the hot tears that had begun welling in your eyes and threatening to spill onto your cheeks—but you took two staggering steps back in response, shaking your head frantically. 

“Minho t-told me,” you choked out, “Minho—he wouldn’t tell me much, but Han Jisung—” the sound of his name made Jisung flinch, jaw clenching. “I wanted so badly to believe that it was all a mistake, that none of it was real—but you k-k—” The ugly word caught in your throat like a bitter pill, and with a wince you spat it out. “You killed that man, didn’t you?”

Dead silence fell between you, the weight of your words quickly turning sour. Jisung’s eyes were still boring into the floorboards beneath your feet, pupils bottomless black pools. Your own gaze darted wildly, small details jumping out at you— his fists shaking, knuckles bruised and white; he was biting into his lip so hard a drop of scarlet blood was staining his teeth. All your worst suspicions, the thoughts that had been whispering at the back of your head all this time were burning in your throat like bile—bitter like venom, demanding to be thrown up before it ate away at you from the inside.

“The crime scene, the morgue, the park—and yesterday, the lockdown—this entire time, it was you? Answer me, Jisung —” You tried to grab his arm, to make him face you—but you had no strength left in your hands, your fingers feebly grasping at his jacket instead. “How much of what you said was real? What part of us was ever real?”

The words had barely left your mouth before Jisung’s eyes suddenly shot up to meet your gaze. Through your blurry veil of tears and the dizzying haze of hysteria you had worked up, you didn’t even register him leaning in until you felt his cool hand clasping over your trembling ones, until Jisung closed the infinite distance between the two of you and pressed his lips to yours. 

For a fleeting second you felt your heart stop and you stiffened, his touch sending electric currents searing through your skin—but you couldn’t move away, no, this time, you didn’t want to move away. Because Jisung wasn’t kissing you to shut you up, to hurt you—he was kissing you with a softness that brought tears to your eyes. He was kissing you like it was the last thing he would ever feel, a dangerous balance between intensity and a genuine sincerity and the only thing you knew for sure was that it felt so, so right. With every touch, there was an unspoken promise, a reassurance; a silent you can tell me to stop, you can push me away, you can tell me to go, and that was what made you pull him in closer, your shaking fingers tangling in his hair as one of Jisung’s hands gently cupped your face while the other found your waist—before a bittersweet feeling suddenly tore through your chest and you pushed him away. It was like you had ripped yourself awake from a dream, the taste of Jisung and something faintly sweet—caramel?—still lingering on your lips. Your eyes stung, and when you looked up at Jisung you saw that his cheeks were shining with tears—his, or your own, you weren’t quite sure anymore. 

“I can show you what happened,” he breathed, eyes clouded and voice flat. “I have—a camcorder, there are memory cards, I can—”

“I don’t want you to show me,” you interrupted, surprising yourself with how steady your voice sounded. Raw and scratchy and high-pitched, yes, but steady nonetheless. “I want you to tell me. I want to hear it from you, in your own words, Jisung.”

He stared at you for a long moment before his gaze drifted behind you. The living room. “Come in,” you said softly, and lead him over to the sofa. Knees feeling weak, you collapsed onto the seat, Jisung sinking into the couch across from you. The peach roses he had brought you on your first date sat between the two of you, their petals withered and sunken. You tore your gaze from their drooping heads, fixing it instead on the boy in front of you. Hours ago, you remembered with a detached pang, this had been a therapy session, with Jisung avoiding your eyes, and your notebook in your lap. Now, you were empty handed—you had set Jeongin’s cassettes on the table—but Jisung was still looking away.

You heard him draw a shuddering breath before his dark eyes locked on yours, and it was as if something had shattered behind them — the last wall he had built around himself, or simply a fragment of his heart—and words finally freefell from his lips.

[nothing-but-kpop-dreams]

Frappe Girl

Summary: Barista Yoongi, tries to ask his crush out on a date.

Word count: 1241

PART 2

He stared at her from behind the napkin dispensers. His current semester crush had been showing up to the coffee shop every day for the last month. Like clockwork she was here Monday to Friday at 6 pm. 

“Bro quit stalking!” a voice whispered into his ear.

In an instant Yoongi spun around to find his best friend wih a stupid smile glued to his face. “Hoseok, the fuck?!?” he attempted to be discreet about his cursing while near the customers.

“You're still creepin’ on the frappe girl? Quit it before she or the other customers notice that you have just been standing like a zombie for like ten minutes!”

“I wasn’t creeping alright!” he said in a huff as he walked back to his position at the cash register… only to once more steal glances at y/n as she worked on her laptop.

Since the first month of the semester he had developed a big crush on her. They had only worked on a PowerPoint for a week, but that was enough to keep her stuck in his mind. Since then he has been wishing for another chance to work together and have a new reason to talk to her.

“Dude, why don't you just ask her out already?” Hoseok asked under his breath as he cleaned up the work area. 

“I can’t. I get too nervous at the thought of it.”

“It isn’t that hard. Just go up and ask her.” Hoseok said as if it was so easy.

“... And if she says no?”

“Then she says no. It won’t be that bad bro.”

“Yes it will!” Immediately all the negative thoughts flooded his head. “I’m gonna have to see her in class after this you know! What- What if we get partnered up again? That won’t go well at all!”

“You’re worrying about something that hasn't even become a reality yet. Look, if she says no, then she says no. Then, you can move on and find someone else to stalk.”

Yoongis’s fist shot through the air and hit Hoseok on his side, out of sight of the customers of course. 

Hoseok only laughed at his subtle attack. He did anything to test Yoongi’s temper at work. He mostly did it when work got slow and things got boring. “Ok, ok look. Greatest wingman in existence is here to save the day. Take this.” Hoseok, leaned into the pantry display and pulled out a chocolate cupcake. It had a load of chocolate frosting and a red fondant heart on the top. “Go up to her and tell her it's a thanks from the café. That she has been such a great customer for so long or something.”

“But- But I’m on the clock.” Yoongi thought of an excuse on the spot to not go through with his best friend's sick idea.

Hoseok only shrugged at him. “Take your break early today. It’s slow right now.”

“It doesn't even make sense to give it to her right now though! She already made her order and has her coffee!” Yoongi panicked, pushing the cupcake back at his friend. 

Hoseok only pushed it right back at him, “ Just say that I forgot to tell her when she ordered.”

Yoongi set the cupcake down on the counter. “Bro I can’t do this!”

His friend only ignored him, pushing buttons on the cash register.

“I don’t even know what I can tell her!”

“Well too bad.” Hoseok said strictly. “Cuz I already clocked you out.” he stated with a grin. He then reached his arms out and began pushing Yoongi toward the counter exit. “ Now go talk to her, you're making a scene!’

Standing in the middle of the dining area, Yoogni had no choice but to do as Hoseok suggested. With every step he took towards Y/n, he felt his heart race. His face began to feel warm and y/n only looked prettier the closer he got to her.

Only 4 feet from her, Y/n looked up and spotted him. “Hey Yoongi!’ she said softly with a cute little smile.

He could feel his heart skipping a beat. Suddenly this wasn't so hard anymore. “Oh my gosh! She remembers my name! … Oh wait, the fucking name tag…” he thought. “Say something! Don’t just walk up to her!”

“H-hey!” he tried to say with a smile, but instead the hand that was glued to his side threw a little awkward wave. Again he could feel a wave of warmth flood his face.

“So what’s up?” Y/n asked looking up at him with those beautiful eyes of hers.

“I- um- here!” he just stuck the cupcake in her face.

“Oh um-” She grabbed it with hesitation. “Thank you?’

“Yeah, uh, it's for you.” he muttered.

“...Why?” she asked when he gave no explanation.

“Oh! Oh yeah! Um, it's just uh, it's part of this promotion. I-I uh, my coworker forgot to tell you when you took your order, but like, since you come here a lot, you get this free cupcake!” He did his best to scramble something together.

“Oh really?” she sounded so excited. “That’s so cool! I didn't know you guys had a promotion!”

“Neither did I.” he said under his breath.

“What?” 

“Huh?!” he didn't know she could hear him. “Um, nothing? I- uh- just wanted to know if you finished that assignment for class!”

“Oh that study packet? Nope.” She sighed. “I tried to work on it last night, but it's so much harder than I thought it would be.” She whined.

He couldn’t help but feel butterflies in his stomach. Her whining voice was so cute. “... Yeah, it's a tough assignment. “ he lied, having finished it just a few days ago.

“Hey! Would you want to work on it together tomorrow? O-Only if you have some time though. “Y/n asked with some hesitancy.

“Tomorrow? Really?” there was an excitement in his voice he hoped she didn't notice.

“Yeah Sorry for asking so last minute, but that's the only day I am free.” she pouted.

“Um, yeah! Tomorrow works! I get out at 6:30, is- Is that cool?”

Then suddenly a slightly taller figure came up to them. “Hey babe!” a male voice said.

Yoongi turned the side to see Hyunjin standing next to him, smiling down at Y/n. Hyunjin was also in the same class as him and Y/n. but this didn't make any sense. He had never seen the two of them talk in class together. If anything they had only done a project together… two weeks ago.

“Baby!” Y/n’s voice squealed in excitement.

“Oh hey Yoongi!” Hyunjin smiled at him. “Didn’t know you worked here!” 

“Hey- hey Hyunjin.” he said in his fakest customer service voice.

Yoongi’s heart sank as Hyunjin, pulled a chair next to Y/n and threw his arm around her.

Y/n turned to Hyunjin, with the biggest smile on her face. “Baby, Yoongi’s gonna study with us tomorrow! You’re cool with 6:30 right?”

Yoongi could notice a change to Hyunjin. His eyes host up at him with much intimidation. “Study with us?” his voice sounded a bit hasher now. “That works for me. See you again tomorrow Yoongi” he said with eyes locked on the barista.

“Yeah, uh, see you guys tomorrow, I gotta get back to work now.” he said quickly, just wanting to hide behind the counter.

-Admin Boat

[katsukis-sad-angel]

Bound

Pairing: Sub!Jin Bubaigawara x Dom!Reader

Word Count: 2.1K

Summary: You come home from a bad day at work and Jin agrees to sub

Warnings: Smut (with plot), cursing, dominant reader, oral (female receiving and giving), a bit of bondage

NOTICE: ALL WORDS IN ITALICS DO NOT BELONG TO ME!!! @cuter-than-a-corgi-butt-deactiv WROTE THEM FIRST, I’M JUST USING IT FOR THIS FANFICTION!

NSFW under the cut!!

-------------------------

“B-Babe! Please, I can’t-”

“Shh, I’ve got you Jin. Just cum one more time for me? I know you want to…”

You bounced on top of the blonde, nails dragging down his ab-covered torso, leaving red welts blooming on his pale skin, “You look so handsome when I mark you up like this~ ”

Jin whimpered, feeling his balls becoming tight again “I-I’m gonna cum again! Please let me come inside of you?

You stopped bouncing on his cock, raising an eyebrow. 

"Please what?”

“Please, Mistress! I need to cum inside you!”

You tapped your chin, grinding down on him to make him whimper.

“Hmmm, should I allow you to do that? Cum deep inside of my pussy?”

Tears escaped his eyes, his hands jerking against his bindings. 

“N-no. I don’t deserve to cum in you, mistress…”

You smiled indulgently, patting his flushed cheek, “Awww, yes you do. After all, you’re such a good boy~”

-------------------------

Now, you might be wondering, how the existential mother fucking frack did Jin Bubaigawara get into this situation?

Well, let me tell you.

That morning, the furnace system in your apartment building broke down, leaving you and your boyfriend huddling together for warmth at 3 in the morning.

Your boss was a grade-A, farmer approved ass cheek and you knew if you missed a single day of work you would be fired. So, at around 4:30, you dragged yourself from the warm embrace of your boyfriend and into the freezing bathroom.

Jin begged you to stay, attaching himself to your shivering body while you brushed your teeth and got ready for long hours at your cafe barista job.

You hated saying no to him, especially when you could��ve spent the whole day in bed with him, cuddling under about 23 blankets eating everything you could find and watching cheesy rom-coms, but instead, you kissed him on the cheek, tucked him in, and left.

Work was as bad as usual; coworkers hitting on you and touching your ass, annoying blonde girls and their annoyingly long, painful orders, women named Karen with 3 noisy kids and a need to speak to the manager, getting stared at by old people for having earrings, the same Christmas songs over and over and over again, the newbie that still didn’t know how to use the cash register, the teenage boys that came in every afternoon to harass you, the policeman who didn’t shy from reminding you of your nicely shaped tits, the woman who didn’t know how to use her visa, the woman with the checkbook, the man who didn’t like the price of his coffee, the people that asked for cups of ice, the women that asked for hot water, the people that said ‘frappe’ instead of frappucino (this is a fucking Starbucks ma’am, not McDonald’s), the indecisive group, the girl that couldn’t count money correctly, the 9-year-old with a change purse, the nerds that badgered you with innapropriate pick-up lines, and finally, the woman that couldn’t find her wallet.

It was in there somewhere, she knew it, it had to be in there, oh gee, where could it be?

After dumping the entire contents of her purse on the tiny counter space, she found it and dumped the used tissues, tubes of lipgloss, empty packs of gum, wrappers, crumbs, crumpled receipts, a tampon or three, and her flip phone back in her purse with a big smile.

6 long hours later, you were done.

You stood in the break room, untying your green apron when one of the jerks you worked with that kept asking you for ‘your digits’ came up to you and smiled.

“Y/n! My beautiful coworker! Will you go out with me?” He asked, kneeling down in front of you, arms outstretched.

“What was that? I don’t speak dork.” You snarled, “For the billionth time, I have a boyfriend! Leave me alone!”

“Y/n, my sweet, sweet sugarplum! Don’t be so nasty! I love-”

“Hey, sugar tits~” A deep voice drawled.

You turned to see a taller jerk, leaning in the doorway, his black hair framing his perfect smug features.

“What now?” You asked, exasperated.

“Don’t be like that baby girl!” He smiled, his intoxicating cologne invading your coffee-tainted nostrils as he came closer.

You felt nauseous.

“Was this dork speaking to you?”

“Yes.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I hope your IQ didn’t drop too much.”

“Fuck off.”

“Y/N! LANGUAGE!”

Your boss burst through the door.

“You’re not the boss of me!” You glared, crossing your arms.

He rolled his eyes.

“That brand of language is not supposed to be used in this environment!” Boss huffed, “Control yourself!”

That’s it.

You were sick of this shit.

“Why doesn’t your fat ass control your fucking employees?” You snapped, “I come here every day only to be badgered by these idiots every 30 seconds!”

You turned to the shorter jerk.

“You!” You shoved a finger in his face, “You’re a spazzy, beetle-headed doofus with the IQ of a mule hoof!”

/

Author’s Note in the middle of the story - if anyone knows what that last line is from, I love you

/

“You!” You turned to the taller jerk, “You’re a horny, retarded, ugly bastard who can’t keep his hands to himself for more than 2 seconds! No wonder you’re single!”

Finally, you turned to your seething boss.

“You! Oh, you.” You laughed hysterically pushing stray hair out of your eyes, “You are the fattest, dumbest, most disgusting of them all! Lazy, stupid, cheap-skate, asshole! I quit!”

You tore off your apron, wiped your wet and muddy boots on it and left the building, slamming the door behind you with all your might.

----------------

You entered your apartment, finding Jin on the couch, bundled up in layer upon layer of blankets and a mug of hot chocolate in his hands.

“Y/n!” He cheered, a happy smile lighting up his features, “There’s more on the stove. Come sit with me!”

You sighed, shed your coat and purse, got a cup of cocoa, and snuggled into your boyfriend’s chest.

You sighed.

“Bad day princess?”

“I quit my job.”

“Fun.”

“Yeah.”

You were quiet for the next few minutes, sipping your cocoa and letting Jin’s warmth envelop your shivering frame.

You chugged the last few sips and set your cup aside. 

“Jin, can we have sex… like… right now?”

You didn’t have to ask twice.

Seconds later, you were pinned to the couch and Jin was attacking your lips ferociously, biting and nipping and wrestling your tongue for dominance.

You groaned loudly and grabbed the growing bulge in his sweatpants.

“You… you were dom last time,” You panted, squeezing just enough to make him whine, “My turn.”

---------------------

Moments later, you were on the bed, sitting on his clothed cock, sucking his nipples and grinding.

“Y-Y/n… I-”

“Ssssh, no talking.” You hushed, nipping savagely at one of his perked buds.

Jin hissed and bucked his hips, rutting his throbbing length against your naked pussy.

You juices soaked through the fabric, lubricating his throbbing length.

You ground harder, making him gasp and writhe under your expert touches.

“Princess, I-”

“What did I say about talking?” You asked, peeling off your shirt.

“N-Not to…”

“That’s right! Such a good boy!” You patted his cheek, “Now beg.”

“P-Please y/n, I-”

“What’s my name?”

“Mistress! I’m sorry!”

“Tell me how bad you want me to sit on your face.”

“I want it! I wanna eat out your pretty pussy forever, I won’t let a drop go to waste!”

Satisfied with his pleas, you turned around and sank your dripping pussy over his mouth.

“Th-Thank you! Thank you mistre- oomf!”

You ground down on his face while he held your hips in a vice-like grip pressing his tongue everywhere he could and sucking your sweet nectar like it was his last meal. His teeth scraped your clit, making you scream and came on his face.

As he'd promised, he didn't let a single drop of your essence escape.

Jin nearly suffocated, but you shakily sank down on his girth before he went purple from pleasure and lack of oxygen.

After he was completely sheathed inside of you,  you bounced at a slow, excruciating pace, attempting to carve out every inch of pleasure available.

You continued to tease and grind on him until he began begging you to go faster.

"Princess... haa~ faster!" He pleaded, attempting to grip your bouncing hips.

"No Jin, keep your hands to yourself." You commanded, swatting his trembling digits away.

He was panting and moaning, jumbled sentences of praise and pleasure spilling from his puffy lips as you continued your ministrations.

Sweat trickled down his forehead, making his short blonde curls stick to it.

He looked spent.

"How does it feel Jin?" You asked, lifting your hips so only his tip was clenched in your dripping folds.

He whined and looked at you as you wiggled your hips while seductively smirking at him.

"G-Good... s-so good mistress th-thank you." He whimpered, trying not to buck his hips.

"So polite, I think you deserve a reward, don't you?" You smiled, rolling one of his flushed nipples and sinking a little on his painfully hard dick.

"It's up t-to you... holy... holy shit~"

You got off of him, ripping a whine of displeasure from his throat, but you immediately bent down and sucked him off.

He came undone, spilling his thick seed down your throat.

"You taste so good Jin," You simpered, settling your cunt on top of his limp dick and rutting it slowly.

“Mistress, I need your pussy so baaad!” He whimpered, eyes welling up.

“What do you say?”

“Please!”

“Please what?”

“Please sit on my cock and ride me, mistress!” He cried, straining at his bindings.

“Good boys get rewarded. Are you a good boy Jin?” You taunted, massaging his balls.

“Yes, yes! I’m your good boy!”

“And what do good boys get?”

“Pussy!”

“That’s right.”

You positioned your dripping heat over his throbbing length and made it disappear, your velvety walls clenching around his fat length as you went.

You moaned quietly, clutching his hips tightly and bruising his pale skin.

“Fuck… fuck… FUCK!” He cursed as you began a steady rhythm.

You moaned, grinding on his length before rocking your hips up and down against his, hitting your g-spot every time.

“B-Babe! Please, I can’t-”

“Shh, I’ve got you Jin. Just cum one more time for me? I know you want to…” You moaned, smiling at him lewdly.

You bounced on top of the blonde, nails dragging down his ab-covered torso, leaving red welts blooming on his pale skin, “You look so handsome when I mark you up like this~ ”

Jin whimpered, feeling his balls becoming tight for the fourth time that night. “I-I’m gonna cum again! Please let me come inside of you!”

Much to his displeasure, you stopped bouncing on his cock raised an eyebrow. 

"Please what?”

“Please, Mistress! I need to cum inside you!”

You tapped your chin, grinding down on him to make him whimper.

“Hmmm, should I let you do that? Let you cum deep inside of my pussy?”

Tears escaped his eyes, his hands jerking against his bindings. 

“N-no. I don’t deserve to cum in you, mistress…”

You smiled indulgently, patting his flushed cheek, “Awww, yes you do. After all, you’re such a good boy~”

With that final goading comment, Jin bucked up as you came down, hitting your spot while his ropes of hot cum painted your insides white.

You lifted yourself off of his girth and sat on his face again saying, “Clean up your mess!”

He obliged, sucking, biting, and pleasing your cunt until you came down on his face.

You lifted yourself off, but he immediately began whining for you to come back and untie him because he was cold.

You came back and toweled him off, untying his wrists and kissing the red marks etched into his skin. 

Kissing his forehead sweetly, you help him get dressed in new sweatpants and snuggle into bed with him.

“I love you princess.” He sighed happily as you pressed kisses to his shoulders.

“I love you too, but you know Jin? You moan like a slutty girl.”

“I do?”

“Sorta.”

“Well... you do too when I dom.”

“That’s because I am a girl.”

“Right.”

“Go to sleep Jin.”

“‘Nighty night baby.”

“Love you Jin.”

----------------------------

NOT MY ART!! DON’T LIE TO MEH I KNOW YALL’s EYES WENT STRAIGHT TO JIN’S DI*K

...

very square dicc

💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

[sunarintoes]

Synopsis: Yn Ln is an environmentalist - Miyagi University’s very own campus ‘Green Thumb.’ One day Hinata Shōyō who happens to be a close friend of Yn, invites them to come to one of his races. The only problem is that this race of his, is illegal. Read the journey of Yn who has been sucked into the world of illegal street racing with the one goal: to create an eco-friendly race car.

TW: none :)

WC: 1.2K

Note: hello! I’m back! Hope you enjoy this week’s chapter because I’m quite happy with how it turned out.

An Old Touch

A week ago if someone had told you that you would spend two to three nights a week at an almost empty gas station food court with Oikawa of all people, you would have laughed in their face and told them that was the funniest thing you have heard all day. But here you are, sitting across from said man at a small table towards the right back corner next to the overly large glass walls - the same seat as last time, and the time before that. 

You take a long sip from your drink - a vanilla bean frappe, before deciding that you wanted to share something. ‘I know we have rules and all, but strangers tell each other about their lives right?’

‘Yeah I guess they do,’ he looks at you and sees that you have a distressed face, ‘what? Is there something you need to get off your chest?’

‘Yeah actually… if that's alright?’

‘Yeah yeah go for it.’

‘Uh… thanks? It's just that- if your ex, who might I add broke your heart, came back into your life in a sick twist of fate would you take them back?’

Oikawa scoffs, ‘no way! Why should I take someone back who broke up with me? It's their loss they can reap it.’

You let out a sad laugh, ‘yeah but, what if you never really got over them?’

He scowls at you, ‘please tell me you’re not talking about Iwa-pooh?’

You laugh at him, ‘dude, Haji was my childhood crush when I was like thirteen! This other person… was my first everything and then one day they just… yeah.’

You feel tears well up in your eyes and decide to drop the subject, ‘you know Yn. Second chances exist - not that I believe in them, but people can change. You're young, I'm assuming this was a relationship from highschool or whatever? This person has probably matured and seen the error of their ways - or they haven't! That's up for you to find out. I'm not saying that you should just jump right into their pants, but you know you could just become friends? Let the relationship develop from there… if it blooms into something romantic then great! If not then you just got to move on and accept that you’re not meant to be.’

You make eye contact with Oikawa, ‘thanks… that's actually the nicest thing that's come out of your mouth. I almost thought you were possessed for a second.’ He clicks his tongue and kicks your chair sending it back a few places. You look back down to the floor, ‘I'm confused. I still have these feelings for my ex but when I saw Haji again I felt like a schoolgirl in love. I know it's been ten years since I last saw him and all that jazz but being with him again- especially because he’s matured so well, has yeah... reawakened forgotten feelings.’

Oikawa narrows his eyes at you, ‘don’t. Please just go back to your ex if you have to choose.’ You look at him confused, ‘we’re strangers. I can be mean if I want but it's just, I don't want my Iwa-pooh to be hurt that's all. Besides he’s too busy for a relationship, I’m sure of it.’

The atmosphere feels icy and you regret bringing up Iwaizumi. You aren't sure why Oikawa seemed so defensive of his best friend but now you know not to bring it up again. Maybe he is telling the truth, he doesn't trust you so why should he trust you with his best friend heart?

‘Are you excited for tomorrow night? I am. I've never seen an actual street race.’

Oikawa’s body loosens up and his tone of voice becomes less hostile, ‘yeah it should be good. Every single racer is going at it. Should be interesting.’ 

Neither of you say anything else to continue the discussion instead you silently agree to leave it at that. The silence that engulfs the table no longer feels suffocating and awkward as it had the first and second times the two of you caught up, alternatively the silence feels refreshing and supportive - nothing has to be said and you are both okay with that. 

‘Isn't this a little extravagant?’ you say as you walk into the clubroom, ‘are you sure this is the same room as every other race?’

Sugawara chuckles, ‘of course it is! We’ve just brought out some screens and couches, the cctv cameras are streaming to the screens as well - thanks to Tsukishima.’

You feel your jaw drop, ‘what do you mean?’ 

He looks back over his shoulder at you, ‘what do you mean, what do you mean? I told ya, we hacked into the public cctv cameras and are streaming them on these screens placed around the room because it's cold outside and more comfortable in here! Simple, really.’

You scowl at him, ‘it's not that simple and you know it.’

‘Yn, you're here… do you want to sit together?’

You turn around at the familiar voice, ‘no Kiyoko, I don't.’ 

She looks at you with a hurt expression, ‘please,’ she pleads almost silently.

You feel your eyes soften and your composure loosen, ‘fine but we’re sitting at least one person apart.’

She gives you a small smile- oh how you've missed that smile, ‘that's fine.’

The two of you make your way to the couches where the rest of Karasuno who weren't racing were sitting. You take the end seat so the only person next to you is Sugawara, until he decides to get up and sit with Ennoshita leaving the space empty for Kiyoko to sweep in. You curse him in your mind. 

‘So Yn. Perfect time to talk huh?’

‘You look away from her and focus solely on the screen, ‘no, it is not.’

She places a delicate hand on your thigh, ‘yes it is, the races don't start for a minute or two.’

You scowl, ‘I'm busy praying for a certain captain to flunk the race.’

Her eyes widen a bit and she moves closer, ‘you don't mean Daichi right?’ She says in a hushed whisper.

You scoot closer to the edge, ‘no I don't,’ you harshly whisper back, ‘I'm talking about that idiot Oikawa!’

‘I see,’ her voice is soft, so, so delicate, in all these years her voice has not changed, it still feels nostalgic - like home, comfort and familiarity. Her voice is like a soft feather floating in the delicate winds of spring. Kiyoko reminds you of springtime, it doesn’t help that she smells like a beautiful bouquet of flowers either. You stare into her eyes - not registering that she was already looking at you. You feel mesmerised by  her presence. ‘You seem distracted, Yn.’ Her voice snaps you out of your daze and you move back only to find a warm sensation softly holding your face in place, you realise that her hands are caressing you - inviting you to lean into her touch. You don't move, you don't fight her touches, you just let her hold your face and just as you begin to really like it, she pulls away. ‘Yn, the race has started.’

taglist: @cutepet09​ @dadchioya

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Anyone else feel

✨Violently ill✨

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