#frankly I think he killed twice because he was growing too attached

[softer-ua]

Anyone else every think about the fact that Hawks time with the league was probably his first time hanging around people his own age like ever?

Like his first real chance to make a friend his own age and it’s with a pack of wanted criminals, some of which are mass murderers, and even then it’s still all pretend and just part of the job

Hawks never had a childhood, his adolescence was given up to the government to turn him into a solitary soldier, and then finally training is over, he’s allowed out in the open giving him some micro amount of freedom but he’s been put on a level where everyone around him is like 10, 20+ years his senior

So there’s just no opportunity for him to make friends, off the clock he belongs the the commission board and on the clock he’s a solo prodigy surrounded by grown ass adults who are have their own lives and are there to do a job.

Not only are they much older they also just have lives and projects outside of active hero duty, and it’s not exactly a career that makes socializing easy so even if there had been a 20 something willing to little brother up this awkward ass teen there wouldn’t have been the time

Which I’m sure is exactly why Hawks so desperately dreams about a future where he has free time, he’s in his 20’s with no friends or family to get coffee with let alone celebrate anything with

After he earned that number 2 spot, when the lights went out band everyone went home or to after parties, where did Hawks go?

Did he go patrolling? To greet fans? Did his agency throw him a little party? Is he close with any of them, maybe he has someone who’s job it is to be someone he can lean on like like a discrete handler who’s the agency’s manager or Hawks old trainer?

Or did he accomplish this astonishing feet only to be shuffled off to an empty apartment like it was just any other night?

How would it feel to live in such isolation and then get a brief reprieve from it but with people you knew where dangerous and cruel, but they’re also loyal and comfortable and kind to one another and by extension are offering that potential to you for the first time

And then you have to kill one of them? Because it they pose a threat to the people you’ve only ever been told about, the people who have real families and love and support that was built naturally and innocently

LOV is everything Hawks had ever been told was bad, but the closest to kinship he’d ever had

[dracosearlgreytea]

indelicate marks (11)

indelicate marks: chapter eleven - the accusation 

A/N: aaa okay so heres the next chapter! ive been lowkey stressed about posting this chapter as it took a lot to write, but i hope you enjoy it.. thank you so so so much for the increased support from everyone, if i havent replied to a comment dw i do read them! they literally transform my day no matter how i feel, so yeah just thank you. lotsa love - ivy 

warnings: language, strong descriptions of ptsd/reliving bad memories, graphic descriptions of deep cuts and bleeding

lovely tags: @h-annahayy @okaydraco @fanficflaneuse @thatoneasrastan @biinspiration @honeymelon22

indelicate marks index 

January and February, after the first meeting of the year, passed by quiet. Draco's state was getting worse. Every time you'd see him, even when you'd met twice a week, something about him was growing... darker. Sometimes it wasn't just the bags under his eyes, or the sharpness of his cheekbones. Sometimes it was the way his tone never lifted out of the monotonous state he tended to abandon around you. Sometimes it was the way he could hardly hold a conversation, or the anxiety would overwhelm him and you'd have to sit with him tucked into your chest, praying that his breathing would settle soon. But, somehow, within the misery that hung over the two of you, you also managed to find the friend you had waited so long for. Draco was funny. Dry, and witty, and frustratingly funny. The things that he'd say as a passing comment could make you double over in laughter. You'd always find his lips shooting up into that wicked grin you'd grown to adore. That smile was something you'd find few and far between, and its rarity only settled it closer to your heart. He was smart, too - a lot less stupid that he made himself out to be. Draco could easily give Granger a run for her money, if he wanted to. He had a secret passion for Muggle literature. Something, which you found out totally by mistake  - and continued to bring up at any given opportunity just to annoy him. To your utter shock, Draco also played piano. He'd described an organ, back in Malfoy Manor. His parents would usually enchant to play by itself - but, his mother had still taken it upon herself to teach him how to play it when he was a child. The insights he offered you into his life were quite frankly fascinating. It was still odd. The dynamic between you was never quite settled; impermanent. There were little things you found yourself holding onto. Like his smile, or the way he frowned when he listened to you talk, as though he was really focusing on your words.   Since your realisation at the beginning of the year, your affections for Draco had only grown. Most of the time, you'd manage to ignore it, only swallowing back the flutters in your chest. Because there was no way you could fancy Draco Malfoy. There was no way he would ever reciprocate, and there was no way it could ever work between you even if he did. And, it was nice. Being friends with someone. You could cope with the darkness he carried. You could cope with pushing away any indication of your developing attachment to him. Having someone to talk to, to even just be around - complicated or not - was a privilege you had never had. But, as much as you attempted to ignore it, the tension at Hogwarts was also getting a lot worse. Trying not to think about what would happen when you had to return home at the end of the year was difficult. Even the idea of having that mark on your arm was sickening. You didn't even want to acknowledge the fact that to take it, you would have to expose the mark that already sat on your forearm. Most likely, to the Dark Lord himself. The glares got worse. The comments got more threatening. Walking the corridors was not safe for you. Not when your parents had killed so many families of the students around you. It hadn't exactly been before, but now, with that suffocating atmosphere, it had only gotten worse. Keeping a firm grip on your wand at all times was second nature, at this point. You had been on your way to a meeting with Draco when your fears became too real. The feeling of someone following you had been tugging at your conscious for most of the day. But then, most people were watching you, anyway, eyes lingering on you in every hall or classroom you passed through. So, you'd only shrugged it off as your paranoia overreacting. It was still light. With winter beginning to pass, the nights were growing shorter. Weekly trips to the classroom were no longer spent in the dark, much to your appreciation. Just as you reached the last staircase leading to the third floor, it jumped into action. It swung away from your destination, and you ground your teeth, hanging onto the railings. Again, you only passed your mistake off as a busy mind - until you glanced behind you. The previous staircase had also moved. A distinct dread began to poison your gut. With the piece of staircase behind you gone, your only choice was to progress onto wherever this one would take you. You swallowed, staring up as the stairs docked. It lead onto a one-way corridor, a piece of the castle that was rarely used, and a quiver ran over your hand as you wrapped your fingers around your wand. Slipping it from your back pocket, you finally shifted. Someone wanted you in that corridor. Someone wanted you cornered. The second you stepped off of the stairs, it jolted away from you, only confirming your assumption. Stranded in the corridor, the lack of windows cast an eerie shadow down its length. There was only two classrooms coming off the sides, and one at the end - most likely locked, with a spell more powerful than 'alohamora' would fix. Edging forwards, you flung your eyes around you. Your heart was thudding dangerously in your chest - it was currently dinner. No one would be around to help if something happened, assuming anyone would help you. Draco was unlikely to come searching for you if you turned up late, waiting on the opposite side of the moving staircases. You only hoped you could reach the stairs before something bad could happen to you. Pausing, your eyes met the end doorway. It was ajar. You pressed yourself against the wall as you shifted closer - the opening only offered to show you a slice of darkness within. Someone could be, however, waiting for you inside. Hoping your curiosity would get the better of you. Preparing to jump you. Setting your wand upright and poised, you lifted your hand, before shoving the door open. Only, before you could get a glimpse inside, it had slammed shut in your face. You stumbled back a couple steps, true panic setting in. "Was it you?" A voice came from behind you. You'd walked straight into a trap. Taking in a shuddering breath, you spun to face the voice. A flicker of your brow, and you stared at the figure blocking the end of the corridor. "Potter?" He had emerged from one of the classrooms either side of you, wand clenched in his fist and eyes hard. Stupid, you're so stupid, you should have checked. "Was it you, Y/N?" Harry repeated, watching you with an unpredictable atmosphere to him. "Did you curse the necklace?" It took a second for any words to form on your lips. Your mind was going to into overdrive. Harry would not hurt you intentionally, you knew that much - he wasn't that type of person. But what he could do unintentionally... "I don't know what you're talking about." You said. Attempting to appeal to whatever friendship you'd had last year, you kept your voice as clear and honest as you could. Harry, however, did not shift. "It was you, or Malfoy." His voice lilted with questioning, and your jaw tightened. You had to remind yourself to keep breathing, act natural, even at the mention of Draco. Shit, what the fuck has Draco been doing? I know it's bad - it's the Dark Lord - but Merlin, if Harry is involved... "I said," You forced an eyebrow up at Harry in emphasis. "I don't know what you're talking about." Voice gruff, relief flooded through you. You'd managed to keep your composition. There was a million scenarios involving Draco running through your mind, and you bit back a shudder. "Then prove you're not one of them." Shit. Harry had gestured to your arm with his wand. You grew rigid in terror, a shaking whisper falling from your lips before you could swallow it back. "What?" "Show me your arm, and prove to me you're not a Deatheater." Harry said, voice a lot more forceful than before. No, no. No, this can't be happening - he wouldn't - he can't - "I don't have to prove anything to you, Potter." You spat - but there was no denying the quiver in your words. Sickness curling in the pit of your stomach, you clutched your wand, scrutinising Harry's every little movement. He shifted. It was so, so slight. Maybe he was moving towards you, maybe he was only adjusting his stance. It didn't matter, because before you could think, you raised your wand and shouted the first thing that came to mind. "Stupify-" "Expelliarmus!" You could only watch in utter horror as your wand flew through the air and clattered to the ground. All the way at the other end of the corridor. Behind Harry. No, no, no- You couldn't move. Frozen. It was as though you were in that cupboard again. Crushed against the wall, watching as two boys enchanted a blade and laughed at the way you choked for breath. "It's okay, Deatheater. You're going to get your mark soon." Harry was moving towards you now. You stumbled, falling back against the door, hands coming to press down on the handle. Locked. No escape. Breathing frantic, you could only stare at Harry with wide, angry eyes. You didn't speak as he grabbed your left arm, pulling it out in front of you. No, you didn't even struggle. You were still in that fucking broom cupboard. Harry's fingers burnt horribly against your skin, pushing up your sleeve. His eyes lingered on you as he did so, long enough to make your skin crawl. Then, he looked down. It burnt. Burnt, as though Harry had struck a match and put it to your flesh. He came to stare at you again, falling a few strides away from you as you snatched your arm back to your chest. You wanted to shout - no, scream at him, but you could do nothing but hold in the gasps of pain. Harry hadn't seen the blood. He hadn't seen the way the cuts had began to tear open, slowly. Excruciatingly. "Get the fuck away from me." It was hardly a whisper - more some inhuman, animalistic snarl. It was all you could manage. The flames were growing hotter and hotter and you'd forgotten how to breath. My wand. I need my wand. "Y/N - I'm so sorry - I-" "Go!" Something in Harry managed to click, seeing your contorted expression. With one last, horrified look, he turned and rushed away, the stairs swinging back to greet him as he did. The second he was out of sight, you let out a shuddering breath, daring a glance down to the state of your arm. Blood was already spilling down your fingers. It seeped into the fabric of your shirt, like the sea lapping at the shore - but bloodier, and a lot more sickening. "How does it feel to bleed, Deatheater? I bet you're fucking enjoying it, you sicko, just like your parents did." An involuntary whimper escaped you, unable to contain it with your mind so hazy from panic and pain. Agony was lacing its way up your arm and through your entire body, and you had to remind yourself - your wand. I need my wand. Staggering forward, you focused your gaze on your wand at the end of the corridor. Blood was spilling steadily onto floor, staining your shirt, but you refused to acknowledge it. Groans escaped your throat, scalding pain cutting deeper and deeper into your skin. Feeling the liquid thick on your hands, you, almost instinctively, gave it another look. Your entire sleeve was coated in red. An overwhelming nausea hit your gut. Falling against the wall, you desperately attempted to get your breath, but it only came in short pants. You'd barely made it halfway down the corridor. Harry had taken too long to leave, given the cuts too much time to reopen before the worst kicked in. Last time, with Draco, the reaction had been quick and easy. This time, you were alone, and wandless. Head spinning, you attempted to choke down a deep breath, and pushed forward. Everything was starting to blur a little, your head a spinning mess of thoughts. You couldn't focus. Tired. You felt so tired. You were close. You were so close to grabbing your wand, hands slick with blood as you stretched out your arm, shaking. Another step - a stumble. Your entire body crashed to floor. There was a terrible, harsh blow to the side of your head. Your ears filled with a high buzzing, sight wavering as you stared from your wand only inches away from you, to your left arm. Ten letters, red and clear. Tears rolled down your cheeks, but you didn't recognise them. It hurt, it hurt so bad, you couldn't think, couldn't breath. It was all a blur, really. A blur of torments and whispers. A blur of blade against skin. "Deatheater." "Y/N? Y/N-"

[drbtinglecannon]

Ok so @bad-luck-qrow made this post about an exchange they had with their cousin, who Galaxy brained suggested a far better solution than what v7e12 did. I really wanted to expand and ramble off on it and all the ways this rewrite idea was better than what canon did, but I didn’t want to bog down their original post so here’s a new one!

Their cousin had suggested that instead of Clover dying in ep12, that Qrow was the one who Tyrian stabbed, but he survived. It would’ve avoided any character death and given Clover the chance to reconcile with the fact his partner almost died because he refused to disobey Ironwood’s orders for even a moment.

I love that! Avoids BYG, allows more development for Clover, avoids unnecessary character death angst, and frankly CRWBY wouldn’t have gotten nearly the amount of backlash it did over that ep. The only addition I’d make to this rewrite idea is that Qrow purposely threw himself in the way to save Clover, and the reasons for that is because it would have…

Followed Qrow’s canon tendency for self-sacrifice, and allowed this unhealthy habit to be later addressed and worked on like his alcoholism currently is. Frankly I’m surprised it hasn’t been mentioned at all thus far in canon (that I can think of anyway), because it’s come up in a few fights I can think of off the top of my head where it incapacitated him at least briefly when he did this, the most notable one being in his first fight with Tyrian. So addresses a bad habit and comes full circle.

Shown Qrow AND Clover both following the theme song’s message of ‘trusting love’. The theme songs are supposed to be super relevant to the volume right, but I can’t think of a single case of someone trusting love over duty or orders or what have you in the volume ending, except Penny who was like…already mostly on their team anyway? Winter went against her own sister, the Ace Ops fought the kids, Ironwood turned against Oz and almost killed Oscar to do so, and Clover decided orders to arrest Qrow were more important than dealing with the serial killer who works for Salem (Which were already orders he was following. Why do new ones cancel out the old one?). If the fight ended with this rewrite idea it would’ve followed that theme, but especially it would’ve portrayed Qrow and Clover following that theme, two chars who arguably should do so the most. Qrow with his history of being betrayed and fear of getting close and self-hatred from his semblance, and Clover the professional military man who keeps everyone including his own team at arms length and expressed (in a throwaway line) that he trusted James with his life. The growing relationship between these two despite the long laundry list of reasons they could’ve hated each other was a reoccurring subplot in this volume, and it should’ve had some kind of fucking pay out. Imagine if Clover saying “I wanted to trust you too” was the last verbal exchange they had before Qrow threw himself in the way of the attack? That despite their disagreement and the bs of that situation Qrow trusted in love, and then with Clover having to rush to get him help and reevaluate that if he just listened to his heart Qrow wouldn’t have gotten hurt in the first place.

Been adequate angst without BYG! Imagine! Getting angst without a graphic death of a queercoded char!

Been far more interesting than killing Clover ever was. People are more attached to Qrow, unlike Clover he’s been around for a while, has been given the chance to grow, and is directly related to the protags. He has a lot more involvement and at stake with the plot so people would’ve been more invested in him getting better than with Clover doing so. We just met Clover, give us more time to get to know him and fall in love; what better way than to have him save a char everyone already loves!

Allowed some great symbolism with their semblances (that somehow ended up being a completely wasted opportunity the entire volume). The unlucky one survived again, the lucky one survived only because of the unlucky one’s involvement and not by his own luck, Clover cursing his luck he let Qrow get hurt, etc. It’d also maybe get some more use of Clover’s pin (that got its own focus in the opening) and how Clover can more or less control good fortune whereas Qrow can’t control misfortune, like idk he flicks it calling for help even though they’re out of range but help answers and shows up soon enough it can save Qrow.

Allowed Clover more character development!!! What’s the point of introducing new chars and killing them before we can really get attached? Drama? Get out of here. Personally, watching an already beaten down broken man that was trying to recover and finally made a friend scream out in agony against the bi flag sunrise was not at all enjoyable!! However, watching the Mr. Perfect new guy panic while his meticulously crafted military persona crumbles as he does everything he can to save his new friend (lover) and ignore orders he knew were bad all the while? That I’d be interested in, provided it had the payout of everyone living which in this scenario it does. It’d expand so much more on the many hints that Clover was more than a blindly loyal bootlicker too. Plus from a writing standpoint, watching someone panic as they go against all odds to save their loved ones and the visceral relief when they succeed will always be infinitely more interesting and worthwhile to watch than violently killing chars off for the dramatics imo. (BYG trope or not it’s just not good writing!)

Caused the tension between Qrow and Tyrian to reach new heights in a satisfying way. (@theonceoverthinker wrote a post on this that I was specifically thinking of writing this bullet point.) Like, from Tyrian’s POV in this rewrite he tried to get revenge and STILL failed, this bitch survived a stab from him twice! TWICE! For a serial killer with a personal beef with this guy that’s gotta drive him insane! There’d be great potential for an all-hell-breaks-loose fight now. Instead the way Tyrian said his final words before running off in ep12, it gave the impression he knew Qrow was just gonna rot away in guilt and anguish, that he won, he got his revenge and that’s the end of that conflict, that the combined efforts of 3 seasoned Huntsmen/Huntresses was wasted. I know it probably won’t go that way and Tyrian will probably die by Qrow or Ruby’s hand, but watching that scene it felt like both Tyrian and Qrow accepted that Tyrian won and it was over. Idk maybe that’s just me.

Would’ve expanded upon Qrow and Clover’s relationship, which was am important subplot this volume, in a way that’s like, feasible to fix. I love the Staff of Creation theory, but honestly the trauma and broken trust those two are gonna have to work through feels overwhelming as hell, and that’s ignoring how long the feelings of guilt and bitterness are gonna be festering before Clover gets res’d (if it even happens). Instead, if Clover saved Qrow after Qrow saved him, yeah there would still be that conflict to work through (and Qrow’s self-sacrificing I mentioned earlier), but neither one died, they both immediately showed great care for the other by their actions in that situation, and would’ve been able to apologize and start mending their relationship pretty much instantly from there. Plus, it’d be so easy to finally drive home their dynamic was in fact romantic in this situation, something a lot of fans (homophobes) kept arguing against despite all the flirting, and winking, and call back to canon het flirting volumes ago, and complimenting semblances/colors, and parallels to bumbleby and a few to nuts and dolts too. Think of the romantic tropes this could’ve done, the tenderness the dialogue the reunion scene!! Wasted!!

Ok I think I’m done and y'all get the point. I’m not gonna say OP’s cousin was the first to suggest this rewrite idea, but when I read it I started frantically thinking of all the ways it would’ve easily fixed the shitstorm that ep12 ended up being.

[toaarcan]

Sonic X, Sonic Heroes, and IDW, or: How a bad anime from 2004 spoiled a comic from 2019.

Now, I haven’t been following IDW Sonic all that closely. I get regular updates from Nemesis via Discord, and additional info from some of the Tumblrs I follow that are invested in it, but I don’t really have a desire to touch it myself. Here’s why.

There’s a multitude of reasons for this. Starting with the background of Sonic Forces wasn’t really a good place to begin from, and being based on present-day game lore in general was always going to hurt it, mainly because SEGASonic canon is currently a confusing mess of retcons brought on by Iizuka taking the J.K. Rowling approach.

Wait, no, he’s just saying stupid shit that contradicts previous canon, not trying to score woke points and hoping nobody notices the frankly terrible stereotypes and TERF tweets. Iizuka is taking the Greg Farshtey approach.

Added, as anyone that’s had experience with my opinions will tell you, I started falling out of love with Ian Flynn’s writing somewhere around Issue 200, and moved to outright dislike during Mecha Sally, and to make matters worse I started noticing that some of the flaws in the 200-247 era were also present in the 160-199 era, retroactively making those harder to go back to.

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again: I kept up with Archie for the SatAM cast. SatAM reruns back in 2004 were my Sonic, moreso than anything else, and even now I still have way more attachment to those two seasons of animation than I do to most other aspects of the franchise, warts and all. So Archie providing me with additional content for said characters was a major draw for me. I’d generally put up with a lot just to get myself more SatAM content.

That in itself is a large part of why I fell off the Archie train during Mecha Sally. The entirety of the SatAM cast were removed from the regular lineup, just leaving three SEGA characters with their personalities stunted, even if that didn’t make sense in-universe. But that’s a discussion for another day.

So being written by someone whom I no longer enjoyed the writing of, set in a mess of a canon with a thoroughly shite game as the main basis, without the cast I read the previous comics for gave me little reason to invest in IDW Sonic. It wasn’t for me, I’d just keep reading Transformers and move on.

Then MTMTE/LL ended with a heart-twister and Ex-RID ended with a giant Unicron-shaped fart, and the new comic is dull as fucking dishwater and started by killing off one of my favourites, who was also one of the franchise’s confirmed LGBT characters. So now IDW is getting none of my money. Which is good because I’m broke.

Tangents aside, my lack of interest wasn’t something set in stone. If it turned out that the comic was actually really good, then sure, I’d try it. I was up for being proven wrong. But so far, I haven’t felt compelled by the responses from the internet. If anything I’ve been more turned off.

I could talk about how zombies are really fucking boring. I could talk about how SEGA’s recent confusion over what to do with Amy has combined with Ian’s need to include a Sally-esque character to make IDW Amy into Sally Lite. I could talk about how Ian seemingly fundamentally misunderstood everything that was cool about Neo Metal Sonic and somehow managed to reduce him to a boring Eggman minion in an arc where Eggman was out of action due to amnesia… But I won’t.

Instead I’m going to talk about how the comic has done something that would legitimately make me think twice about picking it up even if the FF were to debut tomorrow.

Yeah, I would pass up a SatAM fix because of this, that’s how much this ticks me off.

Now, I presume that if you’re reading this, you have a favourite Sonic character. And you probably feel pretty strongly about how your favourite character is portrayed. If they get a bad run in a game or two then you probably get a little salty about that. Tails and Knuckles fans in particular, as of late, seem to be the ones getting the short end.

Well, my favourite character in the entire franchise is Emerl the Gizoid. I will take Gemerl as a worthy substitute, they’re basically the same character. And the comics have been doing them dirty since the Archie reboot.

(Sidenote: I will be referring to Emerl with male pronouns from this point on. The Maria-soul thing isn’t as widely known as I’d like it to be, so I’m going to compromise for the sake of keeping the focus on the actual point)

However, not everything about this can be laid at the feet of Ian Flynn. Arguably his portrayal of said character is merely a symptom of a long-running issue that has plagued Sonic storytelling for roughly 15-16 years now.

But before we get into that, let’s get into something important: Why Emerl is my favourite Sonic character.

Part 1: Emerl in Sonic Battle, or “How I learned to stop worrying and love the Gizoid”.

This game doesn’t get enough love.

Now, I totally understand why it doesn’t get enough love. There are game design choices, like the grinding and the repetitiveness of the story mode that really drag it down, and because of that, Battle can become a slow-going and tedious experience, and that’s a real shame, because the story that’s hidden in this game is a thing of beauty.

Like most Sonic games from the 2000s, this game introduces a new character to join Sonic’s list of friends. Unlike the games that aren’t SA2 and Sonic Rush, this new character is actually good (This is hyperbole, Omega, Silver, and Shade were fine too).

Emerl enters the story as a mute, barely-functional robot that doesn’t do much of anything for a while, and only seems to come to life when Sonic locates it and attacks it. However, as the robot absorbs more Chaos Emeralds, slowly a personality starts to form, largely pieced together from other characters’ traits.

Emerl, as he is dubbed, is initially childlike and naive, but as he grows he develops a sassy streak, and his speech becomes a lot more developed. Maturity sets in, as Emerl grapples with his own nature, particularly the legacy he carries from the ARK, and Shadow’s ongoing turmoil with regards to the whole “Living Weapon” deal. Ultimately he becomes a hero, following in the footsteps of his mentor, parental figure, and closest friend, Sonic.

That’s right, Sonic, not Cream, is Emerl’s closest friend. We’ll get to that.

But this heart-warming story of Sonic becoming a dad for a robot doesn’t have a happy ending. Despite Shadow and Rouge finding a way to neutralise Emerl’s destructive Gizoid programming, Eggman has a way to reactivate it anyway, driving Emerl into a berserk rampage. This is kind of the one sticking point I have with the game’s plot, Eggman shouldn’t have been able to do this after Shadow and Rouge neutralised Emerl.

Additionally, while Emerl was on the ARK getting Maria’s soul crammed into him, Gerald also added a self-destruct mechanism that would trigger if he ever went Ultimate again.

So with Emerl quite literally exploding with all the power of the Chaos Emeralds, but his destructive programming forcing him to turn Eggman’s latest Death Star knockoff on Mobius/Earth/Sonic’s World, Sonic races up to confront his mecha-child, and things take a turn for the Old Robot Yeller.

In a moment that really deserves more attention, Sonic confronts his own child on the bridge of a space station, while Emerl is running on the power of the Chaos Emeralds and outputting more energy than he can physically take, and they fight. In the space of thirty seconds, they have a ten-round knock-down, drag-out brawl, and at the end, Sonic stands triumphant. Without using a single transformation. Yeah, that’s how powerful this guy is, that’s not travel speed, that’s combat speed. Looking at you, Death Battle.

It’s not really clear whether Sonic outright defeats Ultimate Emerl, or just survives long enough for his opponent to reach his limit and self-destruct, but the end result is the same. Sonic cradles a robot that became his own child over the course of the past few weeks, someone he raised from a baby-like state into a mature and heroic individual, and Emerl looks up at him and asks “Sonic… am I going to die?” And despite Sonic desperately trying to get him to keep it together, Not only does Emerl die, but he’s aware that the end is coming, and bids farewell to all of his friends as Sonic pleads with him to hold on. Shadow is equally distraught, his only friend with a connection to the ARK, someone he can call a brother, someone who carries the soul of his deceased sister within him, is dead.

Emerl: “Sonic I don’t feel so good.”

Like it’s canon that Eggman basically murdered Sonic’s kid.

And goddamnit this ending hits me hard. It frustrates me that Eggman was able to pull a means to drive Emerl into his Ultimate freakout mode out of his arse, but other than that, it’s so gutwrenching, I love it.

Gamma’s story from SA1 gets a lot of praise on the Internet, but for me, this is even better. It’s like Gamma’s story, but if Gamma was actually central to the plot of the game and the characters other than Amy gave a shit about him, and gave a shit about him for longer than a single cutscene, after which they are never mentioned again. Hell, due to Chaos Gamma being a thing, Gamma gets more love from the other characters in Battle than he does in SA1.

But, unfortunately, it doesn’t end there.

Part 2: (Sonic) Anime was a Mistake, or: “Sonic X ruins everything.”

I’ve made my dislike of this anime quite clear in the past. The characters are flanderized, Sonic is a B-lister in his own damn show, the villains are weaksauce or boring or both, the plot is only remotely close to good when its cribbing from two videogames which told the stories in question better, and for the first two seasons the entire show actually revolves around not Sonic, but the least relatable audience surrogate ever made. The third season would continue to include him, but shove him (And everyone else) to the side in favour of a Pokemon whose only move was “Flashback”, making audiences the world over question why he was even there in the first place.

Oh, and it also near-singlehandedly destroyed the thin shreds of character development that Tails, Knuckles, Amy, and Eggman had received in Sonic Adventure 2.

All four of these characters had been significantly enriched by the then most recent console game. Eggman had been revealed to be motivated by an admiration for his grandfather, Gerald Robotnik, but in the same game learned that Gerald had lost his marbles and programmed the ARK to smash into the planet and kill everyone on it, probably including his surviving family, i.e. little baby Ivo Robotnik. Gerald betrayed Eggman posthumously, and it’s clear from Eggman’s interactions with Tails during the credits of the game that this is giving him a lot to think about.

Knuckles is a weird case because most of his characterisation in SA2 is conveyed via… the lyrics to his rap music. Yes, really. He gets minor growth through the cutscenes, most notably in his decision to shatter the Master Emerald early on. Having already reassembled it once after it was broken in SA1, he’s now confident that he can do it again, so is willing to break it to prevent Eggman or Rouge stealing it. Via the rap lyrics, however (Yes I just wrote that), we also learn that Knuckles is slowly warming up to Sonic, gaining a greater respect for him, that he is more in-touch with his history and ancestors after SA1 (Though fortunately not in a Ken Penders way), and that he’s also struggling with feelings for Rouge, a plot element that went completely out of the window after this game.

Tails and Amy, however, get it the worst, as both went through arcs in SA1 that are followed up on and expanded in SA2. Amy had come to the conclusion that she didn’t need to rely on Sonic for everything, and that she would make him respect her as a hero in her own right. And while Amy is clearly in way over her head throughout the events of SA2, she still makes a significant difference, not only freeing Sonic from his cell on Prison Island, allowing Tails’ invasion to be a distraction and stealing a keycard to facilitate it, but of course, she later saves the world by motivating Shadow to join the fight to stop the ARK drop.

Tails had a similar plot, about learning to believe in himself as a hero, without having to rely on Sonic, and in SA2 he gets to prove it, not only partaking in the same rescue operation as Amy and fighting Eggman on even footing, but effectively taking command of the heroes and becoming their new leader, and for the first time, Sonic defers to him.

And then Sonic X came along and fucked it all up.

Eggman became a clownish antagonist with no semblance of nuance, and he actually got off the easiest.

Knuckles became a loud, dimwitted loner who got tricked by Eggman constantly, which would go on to be his personality for the rest of the franchise, ultimately culminating in the travesty against all sense that was Boom Knuckles.

Tails was reduced to a wimpy taxi driver, incapable of doing anything without his giant mecha plane to sit in. This was largely exacerbated by the presence of Donut Steele, who usurped his role as Sonic’s best friend and sidekick for two seasons, a problem which only got worse in the third season when Donut Steele suddenly became a genius inventor too, encroaching even more into Tails’ territory. Tails did get himself some more focus in S3, but only to make googly eyes at the Pokemon, a role which frankly could’ve gone to literally anyone else and would have made no difference on the plot. I would say that Tails being involved in a romance story at all is weird, but given the comics and Boom the weirdest thing about this latest tragic love story for the kid is that the Pokemon was actually close to his own age, because outside of this it really does seem like Tails goes for older ladies. Though she did turn into an adult at the end so I guess that counts?

But Amy arguably got the worst of it. Not only was her crowning moment in SA2 taken away from her and given to Donut Steele, but the poor girl had her promising character arc cut short and replaced with an obsessive, unhealthy fixation on Sonic, combined with a violent temper and an eagerness to smash anything that displeased her, Sonic included, with a giant hammer. Her admiration and crush on Sonic were warped into her being a possessive, mean-spirited stalker, whom only got away with it because she was an anime girl and therefore it was cute rather than creepy.

I want to take the time at this point to stress that stalking is not okay, under any circumstances. A girl obsessively following an older guy and threatening him and everyone around him with violent assault if they ever so much as imply that he isn’t interested in her is not cute, it means it’s time for a restraining order. Sonamy is not cute.

Now that I’ve swatted that particular hornet’s nest with a cricket bat, let’s move on!

I’ve always found it ironic that, despite being the adaptation with the most oversight from SEGA and Sonic Team, and the most endorsement from them too, Sonic X had easily the worst characterisation of any of the shows at the time. But, for all its faults, I can’t blame everything that went down in the aftermath on it. It had a comrade-in-arms. Mediocrely-written arms.

Part 3: Partner in Crime, or “Sonic Heroes also ruins everything.”

Sonic Heroes has a lot to answer for. And I mean a lot. It was the beginning of the franchise’s obsession with references to the classic games, it codified the really awkward ages for certain characters, and it seemed to be dedicated to completely unpicking everything established in the Adventure duology.

Shadow’s sudden resurrection is one thing, at least they had the graces to include a means to preserve his sacrifice via having him be an android, the blame for that not taking should be laid at the feet of his own game.

But the rest of the cast? Ohhh boy. Sonic’s still fine, he didn’t change much in the Adventure games, but then there’s Tails. Despite all the development he went through in SA1, in this game he needs to turn to Sonic when Eggman returns, and honestly this whole setup could’ve been fixed if Tails sought Sonic out not for the sake of having him lead the charge, but rather simply to recruit him into the counterattack he was already planning. Nevertheless, throughout the rest of the game Tails is almost as wimpy as his X counterpart, not helped by the voicework he’s given. No offense to William Corkery, who was probably like six when he recorded his lines, but this what you get when you choose actors via nepotism, rather than talent. But at least he does something.

How about Knuckles? As the other side of his derailment, Knuckles just turns up in this game, buddy-buddy with the characters he was only just starting to warm up to before, and blatantly not caring about the Master Emerald until Rouge mentions she’s going to steal it at the end. This will combine with his becoming a dumbass in Sonic X and become basically his entire character for… ever. Even in Forces, where he’s supposed to be doing slightly better as the leader of the resistance… but he’s a dumbass, and even Ian Flynn, who kept Knuckles as competent and intelligent in the Archie comics (Making the best version of Knuckles we’ve had in forever), kept this ongoing in the IDW comic. The Forces prequel portrays him as deciding to become leader of the Resistance (To an empire that hasn’t actually formed yet) purely to be a glory hound, and then goes on to establish that he was basically a figurehead while the real work was done by Amy, of all people.

And speaking of Amy…

Yeah, poor Amy is basically her Sonic X counterpart. But worse. I didn’t think that was possible, but at least X’s Amy seems to care about her friends. In Heroes, we’re treated to an equally violent and stalkerish Amy, who ostensibly starts searching out Sonic because he’s implicated in the abduction of Cream and Big’s pets, but when they actually catch up to him, Amy clean forgets why she is looking for him in the first place and tries to force him to marry her. Despite being twelve.

Y’know when Amy said she wanted to marry Sonic in SA2, she was joking, right?

This is why I find the idea of Amy being the real leader of the Resistance frankly absurd: Because the only time she led anything, it was a team that consisted of herself, a small child, and a man less intelligent and aware of reality than said small child, and she completely forgot their actual objective the moment she set her eyes on Sonic. Add in an unfortunate stint of very poor eyesight that got less and less understandable with every instance, and we got Amy’s rough personality for the next decade.

While Knuckles mostly stagnated at the same level of stupidity during that time, Tails got worse and worse, losing all of his badass traits with every game, a factor only increased by the “Sonic only” mentality costing him playable status, until he reached his nadir in Forces, cowering in terror from Chaos 0, and crying out to Sonic to save him, despite knowing full-well that Sonic was captured already.  Amy, meanwhile, limped along at the same level until about 2014, where it seemed someone at SEGA finally realised that A) Having the only female character you regularly use be a pink-coloured gender-bent version of your male hero whose only function is lusting after said hero doesn’t and shouldn’t fly in this day and age, and B) violent stalkers aren’t cute, and dropped this trait. Unfortunately, this has been more of a lateral move than a fix, as, much like Antoine in the comics, they forgot to give her anything substantial or fitting after she lost her negative traits, leaving her a bland and dull character, and when you’ve had a character be consistent for ten years, even if they were consistently bad, then changing it without cause or warning is still going to be jarring and awkward.

Part 4: Two Wrongs Don’t Make a Right, or “Why the fuck did this happen?”

As I said in Part 2, Sonic X was made under heavy oversight from Sonic Team, and was heavily endorsed by them at the same time. There were promos for the show inserted into Sonic Adventure DX, a few episodes were released on GBA cartridges, and it received a long-running comic from Archie that ran alongside the main book, even after the show had ended. Additionally, characters that debuted in games from 2002-2004 were restricted from appearing in Archie’s main book for years afterwards (Which will become relevant later). The third season was commissioned solely off of the response to the first two, and primarily overseas response, hence why the original sub was never aired in Japan.

Sonic X was huge. And with that in mind, it’s plain to see that the portrayals of the characters in Sonic X were intended by SEGA. Yeah, all that horrible characterisation was intended as the vision for the franchise going forwards, and subsequent games were adjusted to match it.

And unfortunately, not only did this have a serious impact on the main cast of the games, but it had an even worse effect on Emerl.

Part 5: Emerl in Sonic X, or “Emerl vs. ‘Emel’”

Sonic X’s original mission statement was to adapt Sonic Adventure, Sonic Adventure 2, and Sonic Battle. Why they skipped Sonic Heroes, despite Shadow being a major player in Battle’s story, I don’t know.

For whatever reason, the show took a full season to actually get to the first game adaptation, SA1, and instead spent the first 26 episodes on bland episodic “adventures”, in some kind of strange reverse-Isekai series. However, once it got there, the adaptation work was fairly faithful to the source material, which the exception of Donut Steele’s being crammed in to the plot. However, he mostly followed Big around, and since Big was the least involved in the game’s plot, he didn’t disrupt too much.

Sidenote, after 26 episodes of filler, the actual SA1 adaptation only lasted six episodes.

SA2 was likewise only six episodes, but with the exception of Amy’s big scene, it likewise wasn’t too bad. Tails suffered this time around too, which is somewhat surprising since he was mech-dependent in the anime anyway.  

After some more filler, which introduced the Chaotix and then did nothing with them, Emerl finally made an appearance, albeit they got his name wrong.

‘Emel’ looks like Emerl, and somewhat works like Emerl, but might as well be completely  different. ‘Emel’ stays completely mute for the entire time he’s around, never advancing much beyond Emerl’s initial silent, pre-first Emerald persona. He does get better at fighting, but he’s limited to only absorbing a single skill at once (Except for when he isn’t).

Dispensing with Battle’s interesting, rich, and heart-twisting plot, Sonic X instead has ‘Emel’ linger in ensemble for three episodes, before condensing the entire game’s premise into a two episodes of really bland tournament arc, where Sonic himself doesn’t actually fight and we get two rounds of Donut Steele being a dick to his friend and his father.

‘Emel’ wins the tournament, and is given a Chaos Emerald, and just when you think it might kickstart him becoming an actual character, instead it just drives him insane and he immediately becomes a pathetically weak version of Ultimate Emerl. After kicking the crap out of the entire cast, he is defeated by Cream and Cheese, because even though he can take on Sonic, Knuckles, and Rouge at the same time and win, along with Tails, Amy, Donut Steele and everyone else, he… can’t handle two opponents at once.

This is stupid.

You’ll notice that I haven’t talked about Sonic’s relationship with ‘Emel’, and that’s because he doesn’t have one. The wonderfully-written parental bond that these two characters share in the games is completely excised, and instead the focus is put on Cream. Bare in mind, Cream is so inconsequential to the actual game that she doesn’t even get mentioned individually in Emerl’s dying speech like Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, and Shadow do. Instead she’s just grouped in with Amy.

This is also stupid.

And as a result of this, it means that what is arguable base form Sonic’s most impressive feat just doesn’t happen in the anime, instead Emerl dies because he is lightly kicked a bit by Cream. Yeah, unlike the Advance games, Sonic X’s Cream is not an unstoppable engine of destruction, she’s basically just a small child who can sometimes fly.

Instead of Emerl’s tragic speech and Sonic’s desperate attempts to keep his son alive, we get treated to a prolonged scene of Cream crying over the death of her “friend”, something that is probably meant to tug at heartstrings but doesn’t because Cream’s voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard.

And Shadow isn’t even there! He doesn’t come back until a third of the way through Season 3, and never meets ‘Emel.’

This is really stupid. And, for those keeping track, that means of Sonic X’s originally commissioned 52 episodes, and the full series run of 78 episodes, a stunning total of seventeen of them were actually adaptations of the games that the series was supposed to focus on, leaving us with 61 episodes of what might as well be filler.

And, unfortunately, that franchise-wide initiative had damning consequences for Emerl.

Part 6: Gemerl and Sonic Advance 3, or: “An incomplete resurrection.”

So, Gemerl. I know his name is apparently G-Merl now but fuck that I’m calling him Gemerl. If the comics can do it then so will I.

Gemerl is the worst thing Eggman has ever done to Sonic. Like, there is no contest. Some of his other schemes might be more destructive and generally evil, but in terms of personal pain inflicted, nothing has topped this.

Eggman salvaged Emerl’s corpse, and brought him back to life as a mindless murderbot under his control. So not only did he kill Sonic’s robo-son, but he also brought him back as a weapon.

Come the conclusion of the game, Gemerl predictably betrays Eggman, steals the Chaos Emeralds from Sonic, and goes on another rampage. I have… headcanons about this fight, but that’s something to worry about later. What’s important is that, once again, Sonic is victorious, and Gemerl’s defeated body plunges into the atmosphere.

Fortunately, Tails is able to bring Emerl back properly this time, presumably using the Chaos shard that was left over at the end of Battle’s finale. So, it’s all a happy ending, right? Sonic has his child back, Shadow has his connection to his history restored, and Emerl is alive and well, right?

Wrong.

See, the vile spectre of Sonic X rears its ugly head once more, and sabotages this conclusion. Gemerl doesn’t return to Sonic, in fact we never see him reunite with his father. Instead, Sonic X’s version has enough clout now to take precedence, so Gemerl is now Cream’s playmate.

Bear in mind that Emerl’s idea of a fun game is all-out combat against his friends, and Cream doesn’t like fighting (Even if she’s really good at it in Advance 2 and 3).

And then he never shows up again. Even when Cream is part of the game’s plot, like in Rush or Generations, he’s not there, and most egregiously, in Sonic Chronicles, where Cream is not only an active player in the plot, but so are Gizoids, the creators of said Gizoids are the main antagonists, and Emerl himself is mentioned… Gemerl is not there.

But he did make it into the comics, for better or worse. Mostly worse.

Part 7: Embargos, knock-offs, and misused tropes, or: “Ian Flynn dun goofed.”

For a long while, Emerl/Gemerl was barred from the Archie comics, due to the Sonic X embargo, and when it was lifted, he didn’t appear until the reboot. We did, however, get a suspiciously similar substitute in the form of Shard.

Shard was the original Metal Sonic, but when he was brought back and rebuilt for the Secret Freedom arc, he was given a colour scheme ostensibly derived from Metal Sonic 3.0, but one shared with Gemerl, and a personality that was a lot like a watered-down version of Emerl’s own.

On some level I can understand Ian’s decision to bring back Metal Sonic v2.5, rather than use the character that seems to have been an inspiration for this new incarnation in some way. He’d need a fully-formed Emerl, necessitating a skip over the whole story, since there wasn’t room for an adaptation during the Mecha Sally arc that the Secret Freedom story was framed within. Heck, for all we know, the similarities between them may simply be a pretty sizeable coincidence.

But then the reboot happened and Gemerl finally joined the comic cast. And to say it was underwhelming would be an understatement.

You’ll notice that I said “Gemerl” rather than “Emerl”, because his entire story was indeed skipped. The events of Sonic Battle and Sonic Advance 3 had both happened already. This wasn’t Ian’s decision, as far as we know, his intention was for the comic to start over from the beginning. However, due to the interference of Paul Kaminski, who wanted a softer reboot, Ian was forced to fill the characters’ active histories with a large chunk of the games’ stories. Battle and Advance 3 were among those that had already happened, so Emerl made cameos in both incarnations via flashback… which unfortunately led to a plot hole.

See, Advance 3 and Sonic Unleashed are rather difficult to keep in the same continuity, because both share a common plot element: The world breaking into seven pieces.

For a long while, it was generally assumed that the handheld games and console titles were only semi-canon to each other. This avoided the awkward question of “If the Gaias were already there, why didn’t they emerge when Eggman broke the planet in Advance 3?”

Ian shoved them blatantly into the same continuity, and gave no attempt to explain what was different about the Advance 3 world-break compared to the Gaia incident, which served as the backbone to the reboot’s three year long Shattered World Arc. Why didn't the Gaias wake up during Advance 3? Because that's now a question we have to ask of the comics' world.

When Gemerl finally showed up doing something other than yard work for Vanilla (Despite allegedly being Cream’s friend, Cream spends all her time with the rest of the cast, and Gemerl is basically Vanilla’s maid), it was to get effortlessly dispatched by a brainwashed Mega Man with a terrible name in the extremely lacklustre Worlds Unite event.

This one was more than a little bit of a slap in the face, considering that Emerl and Mega Man are very similar in concept- robots that can copy the abilities of other characters- but Emerl is demonstrably more powerful. Now, if Ian had established that Gemerl had been nerfed when he was rebuilt, either by Eggman or by Tails, that would be fine. But he didn’t. In fact, Gemerl is given the title bubble “Super Gizoid”, implying that he’s stronger than a regular Gizoid.

Worlds Unite is generally pretty bad for having its corrupted heroes easily curbstomp every other character around, to the point that the only thing that can stop them is each other, but in Gemerl’s case it really serves no purpose.

This is the only thing that he actually does in Worlds Unite. He shows up to get beaten up and make Mega Man look stronger. That’s it.

This is something that TV Tropes refers to as “The Worf Effect”, a trope wherein an established powerful character is defeated easily by a new character, in order to demonstrate the latter’s power. Now, there’s nothing wrong with using this trope, but please note that I said establishedpowerful character, which Gemerl wasn’t.

At the point that this comic released, Gemerl’s last appearance in any Sonic media was over ten years prior. None of the comic’s intended target audience would remember him, and they wouldn’t know why defeating him was impressive. And this was, in addition, a terrible way to introduce him to new fans. Though the worst part is easily that this was unnecessary. Mega Man had already defeated everyone else, and had established his power pretty well just on them, and he was about to get removed from play permanently in the next issue. There was really no reason to throw Gemerl under the bus for this.

He made one more appearance in the event, getting controlled by the Zeti along with every other robot, and after that he got bopped on the head and just flew away.

Later, he’d make another appearance in the Panic in the Sky arc, and while his portrayal was far from the worst thing about Panic in the Sky, it only adds to the issues caused by the previous showing.

Gemerl makes one appearance, and promptly gets pinned down by the Witchcarters and Team Hooligan. Bear in that one of those groups are the joke villains who nobody takes seriously, and the other are a gang that was defeated by Tails before he met Sonic.

Archie Gemerl was a character who only existed to lose to villains in a vain attempt to make them look better, and that’s legitimately all Ian ever did with him, which makes me wonder whether he disliked the character. And it didn’t even make the villains look good, when you think about it. For anybody that was actually the intended audience for this book, Gemerl had no significance. He was just a robot that got beat up all the time. But for anyone like me, who does remember the games he appeared in, it stands out, not as good writing, but as a blatant narrative device and misused trope.

In this situation, I would simply rather Gemerl never appeared in Archie. At all. If Ian wasn’t going to give him time to shine, or at the very least be an adequate member of the supporting cast, he shouldn’t have used him at all.

Part 8: A Fresh False Start, or: “Wait, how did this get worse?!”

And now we arrive at IDW.

The one nice thing I can say about Archie Gemerl is that at least his personality was mostly on point. He read like a generally accurate take on the character that Emerl was at the end of Battle, which is what he’s supposed to be.

The same cannot be said for IDW.

In the pages of IDW, Gemerl acts like the most generic robot. He speaks in emotionless, stilted sentences with little in the way of actual grammar, leaving him to read like a poor man’s Soundwave, or Soundwave in one of those comics where the writer can’t decide whether they want him to speak normally or adopt his speech pattern from the G1 cartoon, so they just sort of do both.

Emerl pretty much never talked like this, as far as I can recall. His speech development is much more reminiscent of a child learning words, and the only time when he did adopt a more robotic speech pattern, it was a clue that he was slipping back into his destructive programming. He only spoke like a generic robot when he was in mindless destroyer mode.

He gets thrown for a loop by a simple logic flaw, unable to reconcile “Protect Cream and Vanilla” with “Don’t kill the zombots”, and has to be talked out of killing everything around him, when the entire point of Gerald’s modifications to the Gizoid was to make him a bringer of hope rather than destruction, and give him a compassionate heart.

The part of Battle’s story where Cream imparts a pacifistic mindset doesn’t frame her as being right. In that part of the game, they are cornered and under attack by hostile but ultimately mindless drones, and when she convinces Emerl to stop fighting, he almost dies. It’s Cream that learns the lesson there, that sometimes fighting is okay.

This character is already compassionate, he shouldn’t need to be talked into not killing the zombots by a small child, nor should he need her to point out that they’re innocent people who have been made this way by Eggman, because he was made into a killing machine by Eggman twice, and the first time he did die because of it. The character that lay dying in Sonic’s arms, scared and bidding his last goodbyes to his loved ones shouldn’t be the one experiencing this struggle when Omega is also in this arc.

That’s it, really. He’s not Gemerl. He’s a second, less goofy Omega. And it boggles my mind that, despite getting Gemerl’s character, if not his combat abilities, down almost perfectly in Archie, Ian is now subjecting us to this travesty.  

Like with the Archie example above, therein lies the crux of why the steady decline of Emerl/Gemerl that began with Sonic X is pushing me away from IDW: I don’t want to read Ian’s take on this character, because, to me, No Gemerl is better than Badly-Written Gemerl,

This isn’t the first time I’ve said this, either.  Way back in 2016, when I complained about Ian’s portrayal of Gemerl in Panic in the Sky, I said that the way he handled characters that I liked tended to make them the least likeable parts of the stories he wrote. As well as stating my dislike for his handling of Gemerl, I also stated that I used to really like Fiona Fox, moreso in concept than in execution, but under Ian’s pen she was largely an insufferable antagonist, little more than a trophy to make his pet recolour look better, and almost every story she was in only added to the “List of reasons she needs to stop lying to herself and just start the redemption arc already”. Additionally, I said that I didn’t want to see him bring back Neo Metal Sonic or Mephiles in any context, and we got the former, and it was exactly as bad as I thought it would be.

So, that’s basically why I don’t want to read IDW. That’s why, even if the aspect that was a big sticking point for me back when the comic launched was to be undone soon, I still probably wouldn’t pick it up. Because I don’t want to see my favourite Sonic character continue to be written badly by a guy that should know better, and has done better in the past.

If he were simply screwing up Gemerl’s personality the first time he wrote him, I would file it away under the same category as “Emel”, but the fact that he’s done better before, in a book where he had greater restrictions on what he could do with the characters, really settles this as an interest-killer for me.

Well done, Mr. Flynn. I legitimately didn’t think you could make me actually miss SEGA’s tighter control, but you somehow managed it. I would be impressed if it weren’t so sad.

[sieben9]

“the final battle” impressions

{Quick request to anyone reading: I’m watching OUaT for the first time, and I want to avoid spoilers. So, if you want to discuss something spoilery, I’d be grateful if you could start a new post for that. Thank you!}

Ah Once, what am I going to do with you?

I mean, this episode was definitely an Experience™, that much is certain. Just… ::sighs::

Look, if I try to sum it up, I think the best I can do is “this was twenty minutes of a really good finale stuck inside a rushed ninety-minute wtf-fest. Also, those twenty minutes belong to a totally different season.

this is the sort of thing you’ve got to foreshadow at least a LITTLE

The acting was pretty damn good, though.

(Fair warning: don’t open this on mobile, there’s a ridiculous amount of pictures under the cut)

OK. So. Couple of things that I really liked up front, so I can gripe in peace later on. (And readers can skip whatever part they wish ; )

First, and I realise this is a weird thing to enjoy, but I loved how utterly despicable I found Fiona in this one. She may have hung around like a bad smell for most of the season without really doing much, but she sure stepped up her game for the occasion.

Seriously, if Rumple hadn’t killed her, I would have found a way. “Our son”, indeed.

Though, please, have some pity on the poor guy. At this point, he has killed both his parents, and one of them twice. That can’t be good for anyone.

oh look the wall robots are still there

And speaking of Rumple… dang, that was a good scene in the mines. What I loved most about it was that this was literally all him. Nobody would ever know what he did in there if he didn’t tell them, except for himself, and he still made the right choice. Despite being offered everything he ever wanted, despite being under the influence of his curse just as much as ever…

before you ask, yes, my mind did go Places

…and more literally than it’s usually shown. Well done, pal. I should probably be more excited about this, but despite the tense buildup, I feel like the scene kind of fizzled as a whole. Maybe because he already made the exact same choice earlier, and was just confirming that he really meant it, too. Still, it was a good moment, and I was very proud of this walking human disaster by the time it was done.

Some more on the topic of Rumple: congratulations on his acting skills. Rumple’s, not Robert Carlyle’s, specifically. Because there’s no way in hell I could have seen these photos…

…and kept a straight face. Honestly, I’m half convinced that they were a test by Fiona to see if he was awake after all.

Oh, and the book!

The book made it across! And you know why? Because Belle and her son have True Love, even if Gideon cannot remember that, because Fiona is The Worst. And Rumple worked so hard to make Gideon remember; it was heartbreaking to see. I mean, he had to do that for… what? Five hours? And he still couldn’t stand the thought that Gideon might believe his mother didn’t love him. It was a good scene, OK?

On a sillier note (but still unambiguously positive): Emma’s wardrobe came back for the finale!

I don’t know, it’s just nice to see.

Other things I loved a lot:

Any and all interactions between Regina and her now-settled other half. Just. Pure joy, even in the midst of the wtf-ery. And with the obvious standout-moment when the Queen goes and sacrifices herself to give the others that tiny bit of time they need to get back to their world and help Henry (and Emma, but I think we all know who the priority was in this case)

Just… damn. I’m still worried about this woman’s self-destructive streak in general, but this was a good moment. (It also helps that she got better. ‘cause that could have been really depressing otherwise.)

Oh, and since we’re speaking of Regina (or the Reginas, plural), I absolutely adored the speech she gave Emma. Just… I mean, I expect the hope speeches from Snow (and that one was pretty good, too), but this? I mean… wow. Please compare and contrast with season 1. Except you don’t have to, because Regina already did that, and it was beautiful.

Then we have an actual mirrored TLK (see below for a botched version…) in this very good moment:

Like, yes, I love bookends, and this was a great one. Calling back to the “holy crap why didn’t I see this coming” kiss in s1 worked surprisingly well, considering how little interaction Emma and Henry had this season, but there’s enough material in the show in general to make me buy into this. Like I said: sucker for bookends.

In general, I feel like this episode was at its strongest whenever re-focused on the family relationships between the characters.

And to close it out, the ending montage.

Just... it’s like Snow said. They get to live their happy endings now. Snowing finally have the time to be a proper family (and David got a dog!). Regina is accepted and loved by her people (and the Queen gets to have a completely “new adventure”, as Robin so aptly put it.) Snow can do what she loves and doesn’t have to fight all the time anymore. And Emma finally has a place in the world; one where she can settle and be comfortable and doesn’t have to be alone anymore... and I’ll just leave it at that. It’s a good ending.

And no, I haven’t forgotten it--obvious special mention to this bit here:

Yup. Killed me dead. And I died happy, thank you very much. They’ve been through so much bullshit, and now they can be together, and raise their son in peace, and won’t be really worried when he doesn’t stop growing, either.

I also want to give a special shoutout to the five six people who immediately made sure that I knew that 1) the kiss wasn’t scripted and 2) we, as a fandom, are extremely lucky to have Robert and Emilie. (For those who haven’t seen the interview in question, it’s here, and here)

The finishing dinner was nice, too, even if I’m not sure what the whole Last Supper imagery was supposed to do.

Listen, I’ve been going “just let them be happy!” for way too long to complain much when they finally are. Also, I could write an essay on the range of emotions Rumple goes through when he comes through that door and people are actually happy to see him and his family. Or about that look that passes between him and Regina, because I caught that and it made me cry! I don’t think either of them ever imagined they would really be this happy again when they first met and they’ve been through so much crap and just... guh. I like this. It’s a good closing shot.

And now, the rest.

Because frankly, this wasn’t a great finale. It wasn’t even that good of an episode. It was everything wrong with the 4B finale, only more of that.

For example: What was the deal with making Emma lose her belief? Since when was her belief required for the magical realms to exist? The only person who’s ever had even something approaching that function was Henry. She didn’t need to believe in magic to keep it alive, she needed it to break the curse.

And this was never set up as the Black Fairy’s plan. Not even a little. This came so out of left field, it wasn’t even in the same stadium! And it’s so frustrating, because this wasn’t a bad plot, as such, but there was no build-up, no real payoff, nothing. Or, let me put it differently: this was a perfectly fine plot resolution, it just had no business being attached to this season.

Everything felt rushed, there were about five dozen plot points, none of them with any time to breathe and somehow, we still got that terminally boring climb up the bean stalk.Sorry, David, you know I love you, but what was the point of that sidetrack? Nothing happened. There was no try-and-fail cycle (because there wasn’t time for one) and honestly, if you needed a handwave for how they got back from the magical realms, maybe you could have gone with a less time intensive one?

And that moment where Snow kisses David back to life? Yeah, unearned, again. And dear show: the cut-in from the first episode worked for the split-heart curse, because you were subverting it. But here? It just didn’t do anything. This wasn’t a parallel. David wasn’t cursed, he was crushed by a beanstalk.

And speaking of things that don’t make sense…

For the love of fuck. Her ankle? Really? This is such a cliché that even the slasher genre doesn’t do it anymore. And it’s a dumb cliché, too. It’s rooted sexism and it makes it look like you didn’t have any other ideas. I get it, you don’t want Belle with Rumple at that final point so she doesn’t influence his decision. Here’s a thought, then: let her stay behind for a good reason! Or, hell, if you don’t want to write a scene for her (the writers sure seem to be allergic to giving Belle any screentime), let there be a fork in the road! They don’t have the time to check each one, let Belle go one way and Rumple another. It’s still a lazy plot excuse, but at least it’s not the stupidest cliché in the book.

And one more thing…

::sigh:: I have such mixed feelings about this?

Because on the one hand: Gideon had a life that nobody would want. He was kidnapped, imprisoned, kept in the dark and abused for all of his twenty-eight years, and even if he got free, he would never get that time back. Nobody would ever choose that for themselves.

At the same time… Gideon died. The person I got to know over the last half-season is no more. He’s gone. And he never had any say in the matter. Hell, he didn’t even get to say goodbye. It’ just such a messed-up way to get a wonderful thing.

(Also, while I’m on that topic… yes, I did notice that Rumple didn’t recognise his very tiny son at first, and I realise that it’s because he’s never seen him before. It prompted a particularly long “oh noo…”, too.)

And finally…

… that cliffhanger/teaser, though, huh?

I have so many questions. Why was Henry in that monster forest? Why is he now in an apartment and doesn’t remember his daughter? When did he get a daughter? (Also, who with? Enquiring minds would like to know.)

So. I know, like, three things about s7, and one of them is the cast list. Please try not to spoil anything else, because that’s already way more than I wanted to know going in. Seriously, I’m a reasonably grown adult. I can deal with a couple of surprises.

[desertbroad]

kaj + (inverted) tropes: part two! * * i don’t know all the actual Official TM names for these tropes, so most are made up. also, you might notice the regular trope list (part 1 of this headcanon) is significantly longer. this is because kaj has a few main inverted tropes but tons more regular ones, since tropes are like atoms: they make up everything. i just wanted to focus on the few inversions that created her character and let the rest come naturally! under a read more for length. ** also as of 7/6/19 part one isn’t done yet. yes i know please don’t shame me ok IM GETTING TO IT

fridged woman (aka back from the dead)—

for this one i took inspiration from laura moon from american gods, with a few tweaks (love neil gaiman, but some of the things about her character are...a bit squicky). unlike a good number of women in media, kaj isn’t shoved over gently and pronounced dead so that a man can grow from her pain. in fact, she’s shot in the head twice, pronounced dead, & buried. while her “death” means more pain and character development for the characters surrounding her, it means pain and character development for her, too. truth be told, she survives a hell of a lot more than any average person should, especially one with her low luck stat. half of this is the fun and wacky way new vegas’ world works (obviously, no real person could survive all this), but also because of her good ol’ courier determination. things that should’ve fridged kaj but haven’t include: two shots to the head, numerous combat scrapes, being stabbed, having her brain/heart/spine removed, having a bomb collar attached to her neck, killing an entire fortification of trained legionnaires, stepping on landmines, etc etc. the courier is pretty much the bruce willis of fallout.

world ending vengeance—

specifically applies to certain characters. while most others who piss kaj off get the full brunt of her wrath (see: caesar, mr. house, elijah, general oliver, ulysses), benny, along with dr. mobius & the think tank & mcnamara*, get a pass. in fact, she lets him go not once or twice, but on three separate occasions, even knowing he’s likely to betray her again. the reason why? not even kaj knows. some people speculate it’s because she likes him / slept with him (incorrect; she liked house to a degree, and slept with caesar); others speculate it’s because they’re so similar (also incorrect; she shared an alarming number of similarities with ulysses & elijah). the theory that comes closest to the truth is that she pities him. it fits in line her past behavior with mobius & the think tank, who were physically unable to see the effects of their actions and thus were spared a horrible fate. likewise, kaj seems to have judged benny to be innocent in her own personal court, and though he continues to be a thorn in her side again and again, she refuses to “sentence” him for anything. it helps his cause that his plan helped her take over vegas, and he created yes man, one of the only living beings she’s ever fully trusted. also a slight inversion of kaj’s maneater / black widow trope; the one person she truly should seduce and kill, she doesn’t.

that said, benny doesn’t get away from their encounters without any punishment—after narrowly escaping being crucified, both kaj and benny have matching rope burns around their wrists. it’s her morbid idea of a joke.

*mcnamara doesn’t fit within this trope, but kaj spares the bos for veronica & christine’s sake, despite yes man’s warnings. also for the off chance that they might convert to being her allies (they don’t, and this choice helps lend itself to more BOS trouble all over the wasteland).

white man cowboy—

kind of a simple inversion that’s been done before, but an important one and one that i like a lot. for starters, the “john wayne” cowboy is a bastardization of a history that was made up of ethnic minorities and whitewashed for hollywood aesthetic (also fuck you john wayne). while none of my research has come up with anything about women of color or nonbinary people in the western scene, only moc (whether this is intentional or not, i’m not sure), i still wanted to write kaj as non-male. frankly, this is because i wanted her to be an inversion of tired tropes, and that included being a debonair, byronic woman / non gender conforming hero (think gentleman jack) instead of a debonair, byronic white dude. we’ve got 20 of those for every fleshed out woman/enby on screen, lbr. kaj is also a femme fatale, but only by coincidence; she’s more of a wandering heart breaker than a necessarily dangerous woman, much like many of the heroes on screen.

i also find that non-men of color are one of the most underrepresented minorities in fiction—even media that celebrates diversity simplifies them down (hamilton), or centers their narrative and entire purpose around a man (hamilton, again). nevermind nonbinary people / trans folk. for that reason, i wanted kaj’s story to be about a woman of color / someone who doesn’t conform to expectations and doesn’t allow herself to be put in the sidelines for a white person or a male to lead her life. and regardless of whether a woman filling this swaggering, womanizing cowboy role is accurate to history or not, fallout’s setting lends itself an air of exaggeration, so i felt it was appropriate to include her here, instead of arguing with people over whether someone like her existed in actual history (my suspicions say yes, and that these people have simply been erased from the narrative for the convenience of certain people’s feelings, but still).

smarter than you look / deadly doctor (this one actually has a tvtropes page! look it up!)—

from the deadly doctor page : ‘ surely the ultimate example of the morally ambiguous doctorate. one reason for this is due to all his/her training : while having advanced knowledge on the human body can be used to save people, it also gives all the knowledge on how to injure and kill people with minimal effort by knowing all the body's weak points. some more sympathetic examples equate to the medical version of a well-intentioned extremist, who may certainly have good (or at least sympathetic/understandable) intentions but ruthless medical ethics. ’

one of the most important things kaj took from her thorough education is medical training—unable to depend on anyone after being traumatized, trusting any doctor who happened along to treat her illnesses was out of the question. she was also smart enough to know the original kaj wouldn’t be around to heal her up forever. thus, she began her training as a self preservation instinct; but over time, as she grew and relearned how to be compassionate and empathetic, she decided to use healing for good, too. trained as a young girl by the original kaj, and then later trained officially as a combat medic by the ncr, kaj has spent a countless amount of hours inside army tents, healing wounds and assisting doctors with tough cases. she even keeps a medical bag on her person for exactly that sort of situation (especially since supplies in the mojave aren’t exactly easy to dig up). though she’s a big scientist in general (the big mt saw to that), medicine is her specialty. she’s even stitched up her own wounds, though it’s not something she particularly enjoys (it takes a lot of whiskey and something for her to bite down on).

for reference, consider this scene of anton from no country for old men (TW: he’s performing self surgery, so it’s pretty gruesome). though both anton and kaj’s lifestyles are rough and even sadistic at times, they both still have medical training—if not to protect others, then to at least protect themselves. and like anton, it shows kaj’s inability to trust anyone with her most important commodity: herself. this makes her surgery in the big empty doubly as horrifying, given she took specific pains for something like this to not happen. it’s why she refuses to leave without all of her organs (also, stubbornness). all of this is just one of the ways kaj is way more ... well, everything than she looks. which leads into...

underestimate me if you dare, aka femme fatale (sort of?)—

though fallout prides itself on being a soft reset on the world, people’s perceptions of minorities are still ... iffy, due to real world influences by the creators. thus, the people around kaj often jump to assumptions about her based on her identity—mostly, that she’s weak. once, it offended her, but now it’s a perception that she encourages. after all, she’s not flat out strong like your usual hero, but is more of a hamlet-type; smart, perceptive, fast, and willing to strike from the shadows. it’s hard to do any of that if you’re putting on a big performance about your power (though admittedly, she’s been known to go big or go home if she’s planning on killing everyone; if she’s not faking nice and telling you what you wanna hear, trouble’s ahead).

of course, the reality is that kaj is a powerhouse. but these perceptions about her supposed weakness are why posing as a legion member is so easy—those who think she’s weak underestimate her or keep their distance, which gives her leave to do what she wants. she’s viewed more like a pet than a person by most, and though it frustrates her at times to pretend, it also gives her leave to do more, than if she were to simply pose as a man.

all that said, kaj doesn’t exactly qualify as a femme fatale. most of her lovers are just information givers, and they escape from their interaction unharmed. kaj killing her bed mates is actually less likely than her just sparing them and letting them go, none the wiser. of course, you kill one tyrant (maybe two or three) and suddenly you’re a black widow—

[margridarnauds]

Ship Meme: 7, 16, 30; Ronan/Laz or Bres/Sreng

Since apparently I’m in the mood for these two losers...

7. What do they get up to on a night out?

Even though Ireland will always be Bres’ main stronghold (out of sheer stubbornness if nothing else), he also has a bit more of an international reach than the rest of the Tuatha dé and is overall much, much happier just being around mortals. (He and Manannan will both STAUNCHLY deny having that in common, but. Well. Like uncle, like nephew.) Most of the Tuatha dé have a disdain for the mortals, still holding them responsible for them losing Ireland, perfectly content to stay beneath the earth in their Sidhe-mounds and keep to themselves as they’ve done for centuries, but does Bres REALLY care about that? No. He's actually FONDER of them for that reason. 

He’s perfectly happy in Paris, Boston (though the Dagda is oddly fond of that one, for reasons that Bres quite frankly can’t understand), or Las Vegas, where he’s one more face in the crowd. (As opposed to, say, Dublin, which, as much as he likes it for its Viking origins, there’s a not-inconsequential possibility that he’ll run into someone that he cares about or, God help him, Lugh, on the rare occasions Lugh bothers with mortals.) He also tends to avoid Scotland and Norway, because there’s a little too much Fomorian influence for him to be happy, and the LAST thing he wants is for his father to be there when he’s on a nice, happy date with his boyfriend.) 

Their nights out tend to be when both of them relax around one another. Both of them are a lot more animated than they tend to initially come off (post CMT, Bres has really sobered for the most part, ESPECIALLY after the little incident with the red liquid), going from one thing to another. Bres tends to look up everything beforehand that they could go to and drags Sreng from place to place, though sometimes he’s perfectly happy just to go for a walk, now that they’re both at a place where they can HAVE that kind of liberty. Back in the old days, there was such an emphasis on status and having a proper retinue that there were few enough times that they could actually have any time to themselves. Taking aside all the touristy options, arcades seem to be a particular favorite. Bres is a GENIUS at pinball. Meanwhile, he totally takes advantage of having a tall boyfriend to get a ton of tickets in the little basketball courts. They get VERY competitive when it comes to laser tag, to a frankly ridiculous extent. 

(Lugh is always constantly on the lookout, because he believes that it’s part of some diabolical scheme that Bres has to conquer Ireland. It’s been centuries now. He still has no idea.)

16. When the zombie apocalypse comes, how do they cope together?

Honestly, Bres and Sreng are SET for the zombie apocalypse. The two of them are, in their own time, two of the most competent men from their respective sides. (Bres is a bad KING, but look at his kill count in Cath Maige Tuired Conga. He’s a very, very pretty killing machine.) There would be NO problem as far as whether or not they could, like, drive a knife through someone’s brain. The answer is an obvious “Yes.” Personally, I see Bres becoming disgusted with the Tuatha dé fairly early on with things, since they would obviously leave those who don’t fit their Ideal to the zombies (which would include the Fir Bolg, the slaves, the ones who don’t fit into that artistic elite, etc), defecting to Sreng and the Fir Bolg. 

(”Oh no, Lugh’s a zombie, whatever shall we do?”)

I do think that Sreng would be tested to his extreme, because in-canon (I know, always a funny term to use with these texts), Sreng DID have to deal with a situation where their population was depleted that MASSIVELY. And, if we’re assuming this is taking place post-Cath Maige Tuired Conga, it would be CRUSHING to him because their population is so small that ANY Fir Bolg that’s killed would be someone he KNEW. He would have to make a lot of high pressure decisions really quickly, and I think it would haunt him. There would be all those thoughts of “What could I have done differently?” In which case Bres would really be the best person to deal with it, just as a source of stability. But, from what we see of Sreng, he’s level minded, he’s NOT stupid, and he’s not keen on taking huge risks. He’d honestly probably be the best guy the Fir Bolg could have on their side. 

30. Why does it work (or not work) between them? 

Bres and Sreng honestly have a LOT in common. One thing that I don’t think I really discuss as much with them is that BOTH of them start out at this place where they’re essentially outsiders in their own tribe. 

It’s not mentioned in-text, but Sreng’s father, Sengann, was one of the initial Fir Bolg kings who first landed on Ireland, and he would be killed fairly early on in things. It’s not mentioned how old Sreng was when that happened, but I tend to lean towards “YOUNG.” And then Sreng’s brother, Fodbgen became ruler after killing the man who killed their father, only to die shortly thereafter at the hands of Eochaid mac Erc, who was king of the Fir Bolg when Sreng fought Cath Maige Tuired Conga and who would die then. The homefront for Sreng at the beginning of things has GOT to be tense when they send him out to meet with Bres, he’s got to be in this very odd position as far as everyone EXPECTING him to one day kill Eochaid, because that’s been the pattern. 

And meanwhile, Bres isn’t REALLY in with the Tuatha dé either; his father’s a foreigner, his connection to the Tuatha dé comes from the maternal line. And, like with Sreng, it’s pretty easy to read between the lines with Bres and at least guess that he’s not exactly had a childhood as we’d know it (not that a lot of Irish heroes did, given the love that the texts have for the Prodigy Hero). Growing at twice the age of a normal kid, I think that his bonds with kids his own age would have been very stunted, I tend to think that he probably was subjected to taunting because of his status. (Judging from some bardic poetry where Lugh gets bullied for his Fomorian ancestry, along with the little moment in Tochmarc Etain where Aengus is given a difficult time for not knowing his father and mother.) Bres is probably married to Bríg at this point (though there’s such little info available on that one, you could HC it any number of ways), but she’s part of that literary elite that Bres doesn’t fit in with. 

So, when they meet up, they’re both really at this place where they’ve managed to work their way into the tribe, but they’re also not content there, and then they meet someone who GETS them on a fundamental level. Which is why I tend to HC that Bres goes downhill once the Fir Bolg leave. He had a chance at someone who UNDERSTOOD him and who loved him outside of his looks or what he could do for them, and suddenly that was ripped away. And that’s how I tend to see their dynamic going throughout the years afterwards, as the two of them really ARE the only stability that they’ve ever had. They’re really kind of an inversion of the later Cú Chulainn/Ferdiad dynamic, where they met young, got that attachment to one another, and then let their peoples tear them apart. Bres looked at that society that said “You have no choice but to choose us over him, if you’re lucky we might even forgive you for replacing Nuada” already exhausted and heart-sick and said “I have one option left: Break society.” Bres ISN’T the faithful dog to them that Cú Chulainn or even Lugh is but he’s a better man, because he still has a conscience, even if he buried it deep for Cath Maige Tuired, and so he ends up breaking, and suddenly him and Sreng are at this place where they’re free to start things, and Sreng’s stable enough and puts enough of a focus on family ties that he’s perfectly fine acting as another parent to Bres’ kids. And because of the way that things ended initially, Sreng totally didn’t think that there would ever be a chance that Bres could requite things. Like, he’ll still sometimes turn over in bed and go “WOW. How did that happen?”

Basically, unlike, say, Ferdiad/CC, which starts off as Friends-Lovers-Rivals, they go from Rivals-Friends-Lovers. And if Bres is away from Sreng for more than, like, a few days, he goes into full-blown pining mode. It’s pathetic. The TDD have accepted that The Fir Bolg has to be there, because NO ONE wants to put up with an irritable, pining half-Fomorian former king. Because Bres has more or less forgotten how to sleep on any other surface that isn’t Sreng’s chest throughout the years. Yet another advantage of the height difference.

[neoduskcomics]

Star Wars: The Last Jedi Review (FULL SPOILERS)

LAST JEDI SPOILERS

Bottom line, I saw The Last Jedi (twice now) and I think overall it's a pretty good movie but it also has a lot of glaring problems. I'm just gonna make a list of things I didn't like, things I liked, and criticisms of the movie that I think don't make sense.

This is going to be long and verbose, and no one's gonna wanna read it. So, here we go.

Things I didn't like:

- Poe and Finn's story lines are totally contrived. If the vice admiral had just told literally anyone her plan, none of that stuff with the code breaker and mutiny and all that would've happened, and the rebels wouldn't have been decimated. We could've shaved off like forty minutes of the movie.

- Finn, my favorite character from Episode VII, has almost no role in this story. Yes, he's on screen most of the time, but he's mainly a bystander, running around as people lecture him about the greater good and who he's supposed to be. In TFA, he was such an important character, providing Rey with the first positive relationship in her life and adding an element of humanity and relatability to the cast. His story is basically him listening to people talk, and then he does this grand gesture of almost killing himself, which quite frankly would've been really dumb when the movie did so little for his character to earn such a dramatic development in the plot. Also, why the hell weren't Finn and Poe just put together in this film. Rose was okay, I guess, but come ON. Finn and Poe.

- I don't know if this is controversial, because I haven't seen anyone talk about it, but I was very disappointed that the movie just ends up with Rey and Kylo Ren on the same sides as before. Rey felt like she was really earnestly making a connection with Ren and she was really earnestly tempted by the dark side. I don't think it's unbelievable that she wouldn't turn, but it does feel like she was put on the spot to make a decision between light and dark at the last possible second. I would've liked to have seen her actually give in to Kylo Ren to set up a major conflict for the next film, or maybe even just her and Ren forge a new path together and leave both the First Order and Resistance behind. There was a LOT of build up to the connection between them, and seeing it thrown away so quickly felt very dissatisfying. This is something, though, that I think I can probably get over as time goes on, and plus I don't know what they're gonna do in the next movie. We'll see.

- The casino world was meh. Rose was nice but kinda meh. A lot of the humor was meh. A lot of the pacing was meh. A lot of the in-between-adventure stuff was meh. Some of the character arcs were meh. Phasma was meh.

Things I liked:

- Luke actually gets a freaking character arc in this movie that is meaningful and plays off of the expectations of the fans. He is not just another Master Kenobi or Master Yoda. He feels like a real human being who is flawed but also self-aware. He is stubborn and dogmatic, but also introspective and morally fibrous. He is wracked with guilt, but uses it as a stepping stone to overcome a new weakness and become stronger and happier for it.

- Luke, Rey and Kylo Ren's relationships all have great execution in this film. Their scenes together are dramatic, emotional, relatable and just plain good storytelling. You identify with all of these characters, and seeing them play off of one another lets you learn more and more about who they are, how they see each other, how they see themselves, and how that all changes throughout the film as a result of those interactions. It just plain works.

- We get some beautiful and much-needed fleshing out for Kylo Ren and Rey. Ren feels smothered and weighed down by the past, his mentors and his insecurities. He's trying desperately to overcome his weaknesses, kill off what gets in his way, and become his own man. Rey is struggling with a deeply set fear that she is alone, that she has no real family, and that she doesn't have a place set before her in the galaxy. They are struggling with opposite problems, and yet find common ground to connect over. Ren is a fantastic villain by the end of this film and Rey finally feels like a real, developed individual.

- The action was great. The visuals were great. Yoda was great. The performances were great. The drama was great. The themes were great. Some of the character arcs were great. The way the Force is explained and portrayed was great.

Criticisms that I kind of understand, but I think miss the point:

- "Luke acted completely out of character in this movie." Luke is a human being. He has flaws. He can change and experience new things and have new failures and get new lessons. He is not a pinnacle of benevolence, patience and wisdom. He demonstrates impatience, lapses in judgment and anger/hatred in every single movie. Luke becoming grumpy or considering killing Kylo Ren does not undo him as a good person. Him going through with killing Kylo Ren or refusing to learn anything/help anyone by the end of the film would have made him a bad person. He stews, reflects, learns and grows and it's a great part of the film.

- "Being able to smash through ships with hyperspace is dumb/you shouldn't be able to do it/why doesn't everyone just do it." A) It's Star Wars. B) It's Star Wars. C) Because it means someone commits suicide, you lose a gigantic probably really important and expensive ship in the process that you could've used for many years for other things, and now that there's a precedent for it, people will probably stop it before it happens again. It only worked this time because it'd never been done before and the First Order just didn't get what they were doing until it was too late. And if your complaint is that nobody thought of it before, then...your criticism is that this movie came up with a new idea? Not buying it.

- "Rey should've been related to someone important." Luke's related to someone important. Ben's related to someone important. How many of these characters need to be related to each other? Yes, there was build up that Rey had some important backstory, and then you find out she doesn't. That's the point. The film plays off of your expectations and does so in favor of making Rey confront what is to her a terrifying truth: as Kylo Ren puts it, she's a nobody and she has no place in this story. It's a legitimate insecurity that she has that she has to overcome. It's a far more interesting direction for the character than simply revealing that she's Kylo Ren's cousin or Kenobi's granddaughter or something. It's something new to the series and it makes sense both for the story and the character.

- "Snoke never got a backstory." Yeah, he didn't, and I get it. It's kind of annoying. But, you know, the Emperor never had a backstory until the prequels. Like the Emperor, Snoke was just a big, evil figure who was super important and had a lot of build-up, but ultimately was just a plot device for the character(s) to overcome (still like the Emperor). Yeah, we don't know how he seduced Ben, but we also don't know how the Emperor seduced Anakin (again, until the prequels happened). Not saying I loved this part of the movie, but it's, you know, nothing Star Wars fans should be unfamiliar with. And don't tell me there was tons of build-up for his backstory. Fans created that hype themselves. It was never even hinted at in the movies that we'd ever get elaboration on who exactly Snoke is.

This film is not perfect. But it's not terrible either. I get it if people think it's bad--I also think many parts of it are bad. But I don't get it when people say it's, like, the worst thing to happen to Star Wars ever. I think a lot of that hatred simply comes from the fact that Star Wars has been around so long, and has become so important to so many people, that it's become a bit of a double-edged sword. People love Star Wars, and they build a very personal attachment to it. But that also means that when Star Wars does something they disagree with or that doesn't align with how they personally interpret or connect to its story, they get really upset or sad or disappointed or like the world is ending. And I get it. I love Star Wars a lot, too.

But, come on, guys. Star Wars is a fantasy epic about space samurai flying around throwing lasers at each other. It's about drama and evil and good and relationships and magic and story, yes, but it's primarily, to me, about joy. I think a lot of people are letting their positive feelings for Star Wars become something ugly and mean, like Anakin turning to the dark side because of how intensely he loved his mother or Padme. There's a lot to dislike in this movie, but I think there's also a lot to love. Whatever your opinions, a lot of love clearly went into the making of this film, and for me, even if we're inclined to hold onto the hatred, we should make an effort to embrace the love instead.

Because, you know what, it's not about fighting what you hate. It's about protecting what you love.

[land-of-enchanted]

Lord Of Shadows by Cassandra Clare

9/10 stars

Lord of Shadows by Cassandra Clare per usual CC fashion wrecked me into a thousand pieces. I seriously had trouble reading this at times because the emotions I felt and the attachment I felt for these characters made me scared. I have actually read The Mortal Instruments, and The Infernal Devices, so I am familiar with Cassandra Clare style, and her patterns. However, this didn’t stop me from starting Lady Midnight and then reading Lord of Shadows

Spoilers Ahead

Lord of Shadows picks up where Lady midnight left off, and so much happened in this book its kind of insane. I think I am going to do this in a list form of things that happened. (Nothing in a specific order)

1. Kieran getting kidnapped by his father aka Unseelie King

Mark, Julian, Christina, and Emma go into the seelie realm to save Kieran from being assisted by Unseelie King after they learn from Gwyn what is happening. The whole area was the Unseelie king is a dead zone for all shadowhunter magic. I thought this was pretty interesting because I want to see how the Shadowhunters would react that, however, it's something I have seen before while reading Carry On by Rainbow Rowell. Even though it wasn't a new concept it was new for the world she had created and it was interesting to see how the character of this world would deal with it. During this quest, we learn that Kieran can't remember that because of him both Julian and Emma were almost whipped to death. I really like that she brought back Keiran back to the story because I really liked Mark and Kieran together. 

2. The relationship between Keiran x Mark x Christina

Now, this was interesting because I am not a huge fan of love triangles. They actually annoy the sh*t out of me. Also, I think that a lot of people when they write these they never create both suiters evenly. However, like what happened in The Infernal Devices I love both suiters for Mark. It's actually hard to know who Mark will choose because Mark and Kieran have so much history and chemistry. I truly like their story because you know they are two people who went to something traumatic and they sort got through it because they had each other. However, I can't rule out that Kieran betrayed Mark. On the other side, Mark and Christina have something there. Something that is electric that pulls them to each other.  Then, I'm not sure if I just interpreted this wrong, but I think there something starting between Keiran and Christina which would be interesting. (Please let me know if I'm crazy and read that wrong).

3. Julian and Emma Tragic Love Story

Can we talk about a more tragic love story? Like Romeo and Juliet tragic. I actually the characters separately and I love them as a couple. Julian to me at the end of the day he is a kid at heart and he was someone who had to grow up to fast in a world where everything is very cruel. Julian, unlike her other main male characters, is really interesting because his actions and words are always keeping in mind of keeping his younger siblings safe. I find it interesting that you can see that he doesn't care about becoming the bad guy if he keeps his family safe, and there is something beautiful and sad about it. Emma, on the other hand, is strong, powerful, a warrior, however, she is also a girl just dealing falling in love with the one person she is not supposed. Even then there is so much more her to that she really wants to protect her family and Julian. I am a sucker for a good romance story. Their love story is a beautiful tragedy because they could be other, but they have to either break ALL parabatai bonds or become mundanes. They try so hard to stay away from each other because Julian can't afford to lose his mind because of his siblings. They even go to Robert Lightwood/Clave for help them to stay away. I actually don't know how this love story is going to end and that makes me nervous because I desperately want them to be together. 

3. Annabel Blackthorn.

All I have to say is this b*tch. I can’t even talk about what she did because this is me. 

4. The Wonderful Adventures of Kit, Ty, and Livvy

I have to admit one of my favorite trios ever because everything about them was so much and cute. These characters just work so well together. 

5. Kit and Ty aka KitTy

I ship this so hard that I can’t even.

They are truly really cute and I hope we get to saw them together as a couple. I don't think they would work well as parabatai because I'm afraid that we would have another Julian and Emma problem in our hand. Besides that, Kit and Ty are truly cute because I don't think they truly see their feeling for each other. Everything about the two of them screams innocent, and I feel it's pretty fitting that their ship name is Kitty. Ty is autistic, however, on the level of it I don't know (I'm not a doctor). Ty (I think) is portrayed pretty well, and know people who are in the same situation as Ty and those who are in the same situation as the family. I like Ty because I find him interesting, and I find him so complex. When I feel like I know this character there he comes in and blows me away. 

6. Diana and Gwyen

I had zero expectations for this couple, however, they are freaking cute and I love how Gwyen just accepts her and doesn't judge Diana. 

7. Diana is Transgender

I had a big feeling that Diana was hiding something, but I didn't think that it was she was Transgender. I seriously never expected it. While I was reading the passage about her journey, and how she always knew she was a girl and not a boy. I actually felt like I was going to cry. I could never come to fully understand how that must feel being trapped in a body that doesn't feel like your own, and that's alright because I'm not transgender. However, there is something so sad about it that pain and suffering and the discrimination and everything that goes with it. I don't know how any person who is transgender survives because I truly believe they are supermans and wonder women. I don't think I could do it, and I don't think I would have the strength. There is truly something beautiful about something who standing for themselves and saying this is not my body. I truly am inspired by how much strength it takes to do that, and from I know and learned about the whole process of transitioning is amazing how much strength these people have.  

8. Livvy is murdered by Ann Blackthorn

Waterworks happened here. The passage where Livvy dies I had to read it twice because I couldn't believe what I had just read. I seriously didn't think Livvy was going to die. I am going to be frank and thought it was going to be Dru who was going to die. (Did anyone else think that or is that just me?). I thought this couldn't be happening. Then the scene where Julian notices and goes to Livvy, and he has this moment as she passes away in his arms. That broke me. I have a sibling myself, and as much as he annoys the shit out me sometimes. I know that life is better with him in my life than without. (EW thank god he will never see this post). I cried because that pain and suffering that Julian felt weren't only of a brother but of a parent. Julian has been taking care of his siblings like they are his own children, and to see him a character who will do whatever it takes to keep his siblings safe lose one of them is so tragic because of how much I understand this character. Julian is a child of war. The Julian we see here is the Julian that came out of the Dark War. He had to grow up and protect his siblings from everything. He had to make sure that they were feed and taken care of. He pretty much became a parent at twelve. Livvy like all his siblings was what motivated them, and knowing that he lost her was too much. What also broke me is that Ty has lost his twin. Ty who is my son and I need to protect him at all cost. I am worried about him because losing a sibling is hard, but losing a twin must be even worse. That's someone who has been with you throughout your whole life. Someone who has pretty much celebrated every milestone with you. I seriously didn't see this coming especially since it was in the last 30 pages. 

9. Robert Lightwood is murdered by Ann Blackthorn

Robert Lightwood hasn't always been my most favorite character. However, I love Alec and Isabelle. When he died I got worried about Alec and him seeing his father there. Especially since the two of them has had a long journey about Alec's sexuality and Robert accepting it. It finally seemed like they were on good terms which took a lot of work on both parts. Then we have Isabel. My beautiful warrior princess of Isabelle who was brought to my attention won't have her father there for her when she walking down the aisle. That is just terrible. Frankly, this was another death I didn't see coming and I don't see the purpose of killing him because frankly the story centers around LA Institute and Alec is part of the NY Insitute. I was really shook though, and I just started crying because Alec and Isabelle lost their younger brother Max, and now their father. It's just too cruel. 

10. Malec 

BECAUSE I AM TRASH FOR A RELATIONSHIP LIKE THIS ONE. I just loved every fucking moment. That's all. 

11. Magnus & Tessa magic is running out 

I am really worried about my fabulous warlock Magnus, and the beautiful Tessa. Magnus is one of my favorite characters from this series because he is so multi-dimensional. I like Tessa and she was a great female lead from TID. Learning that their magic is running out quickly and that they are not feeling well makes me worried, and it makes me worried about what's going to happen in this book or it has to do with the next series (The Wicked Powers) she is working on.  

12. Dru and Jaime

This was an interesting pairing mostly because it confuses me. I actually don't know how to feel about. Like, I like the character of Dru, and I always want to see more of her because I don't think we had a lot of her. However, I don't know. At first, it was because I didn't trust Jaime because he hurt Christina, but later we learn why he did what he did and what he is currently doing. I still don't know what I'm supposed to feel because you can tell Dru has a crush on him but she is like 13 or something, and he is like 18ish. It's not a big age difference, but mentally it's really big. I also don't know how to feel about this. I do want to discuss more this with someone because I don't know if it was meant to be seen as a relationship in the future or a friendship. 

13. Zara aka the bitch I want to punch

14. Downworld/Seelie Racism/Discrimination

This was something that always interested me about the whole Shadow world that Cassandra Clare created because it mirrors life so much. In today’s time, we are shown so much racism and discrimination that is happening every day. I know some people have it so much harder than I do. I know that I'm pretty lucky for a Latina who lives the USA. However, I'm a person who can't stand disrespect. On one side of the coin, we have Zara and her father I believe represent the worst of humanity, but on the other side we have characters like Magnus, and Alec and Aline just to name a few who want equality and truly believe that everyone is equal. I have to admit at the end of this book I am really worried about downworlders. 

15. Seelie Queen wanting to Black Volume in return for helping Shadowhunters win against Unseelie King

16. Livvy Desvered Better!

Seriously like WTF I want her back and I want the misadvantures to continue. I loved Kit, Ty and her together. They were so much fun, and I can’t even deal. 

17. Zara's father's idea of putting trackers on warlocks. 

That is seriously the most disgusting thing I have ever heard. I can't even speak about.

[jsmulligan]

A Not So Simple Patrol

I don’t think I will ever understand the Hive.  Quite frankly, I don’t think I want to.  The Fallen, I can understand.  I could even sympathize with them a little bit, if they weren’t always trying to shoot me in the face.  Having once been blessed by the Traveler, then being left behind; yeah, I can see trying to track it back down.  The Cabal are warriors; I can respect that.  I hear the Vex are trying to find a timeline in which they survive.  Again, fair enough, so long as that doesn’t involve taking potshots at me.  The Hive though… Biting, clawing, shrieking undead things, ancient and dark, seeking to blot out the Light?  I’ll pass.

Before you ask, I can see the irony in a Guardian being weirded out by things that should be dead but aren’t.  Contrary to whatever a Warlock might tell you, Titans do have brains.  Irony doesn’t count for much when something is leaping out of the shadows at you, and my brain is currently thankful that my helm was tougher than that Thrall’s claws and that it’s still inside my skull.  For now, at any rate.

The Thrall had thrown themselves at me almost as soon as I’d set foot in the tunnel.  They had come so quickly out of the shadows that they were on me before I had time to react.  I punched the first one as her claws raked my helmet, the stored void energy in my fist disintegrating her on contact as a force barrier sprang up around me. Bringing my shotgun to bear, the others crumbled to dust and ash, the buckshot tearing through them.  I was on the move again before all the flakes had settled to the ground.  I reloaded my weapon, the New Monarchy red glinting in the light provided by my Ghost.  The Burden of Proof might not kick as hard as some other models, but it was quick and steady, and the solar rounds were a nice bonus.  

The tracker in my HUD was not registering any movement near me, though it had somehow missed the Thrall, so I was not putting a lot of faith in that.  My Ghost, Elgan, and I travelled cautiously through the tunnel of dust and moon rock.  This crevice was one of many that had yet to be marked or explored, and Elgan seemed to enjoy that fact.  Every now and again, the path before me would go dark as he would get distracted by a mark or stone formation and turn to investigate.  A flick to his new olive green shell would bring his attention back to the matter at hand.

The lack of resistance was curious.  Maybe the Hive knew we hadn’t found this opening yet, so guarding it hadn’t seemed a priority, or maybe they didn’t even know about all the cracks they’d causes in the lunar surface with their burrowing.  A few hundred meters in, the surface beneath my feet changed.  The natural rock gave way to manufactured structure, and I found myself entering a Hive construct. Something in the rock must have been disrupting my sensors, because I was suddenly detecting a lot of movement.  Thankfully, none of it was moving toward me yet.

“I am picking up a lot of activity,” my Ghost chimed, stating the obvious.

“Thanks for pointing that out.  Any idea where should start looking?”

The Ghost floated away from my shoulder, his shell expanding as he did a quick sweep of the area.  Ever since Luna had been reopened for Guardian activities there had been a growing interest in locating anything related to The Great Disaster, the ill-fated attempt to drive the Hive from the moon.  Guardians on strike or patrol had come across broken weapons, shattered Ghost shells, and scraps of armor, much of which found its way back to the Tower for memorialization. Rumors of phantom signals and material signatures kept popping up, hinting at greater finds waiting to be brought to the surface.   We were following one of those rumors now at the request of the Vanguard.

“I am not currently detecting anything unusual at the moment, but the previously recorded sensor readings came from… this direction.”

A white waypoint marker appeared on my HUD.  I turned my head from side to side, watching it slide across my vision, making sure it was locked on target.

“Got it.  Let’s move.”

I stuck near the wall as best I could, hoping to avoid detection.  That became less of an option when we rounded a curve and the wall suddenly gave way to open space.  The Hive had hollowed out a huge section here, the bottom of which was lost to sight.

“This goes down a very long way,” Mr. Obvious chimed in again.  “What were the Hive doing here?”

“Never stopped to ask them.  I usually just punch them or shoot them.  You’d be more than welcome to try if you’d like.  I could toss you at the next knight we find, you could have a private conversation behind his shield.”

“What is it you like to say?  ‘I’ll pass.’”

“Suit yourself.”

Leaning out over the edge and looking down, I could see several more levels like the one we were on that were open to the abyss.  The marker seemed to indicate that previous signals had been detected lower than our current position.  There would be a lot of Hive along the way. If we were to start a little lower, though…

“Think I could make that jump?”

“What?”

“There are two more levels here.  The walls curves out slightly.  I think I could jump down from here, save myself a whole lot of walking.”

“If you miss, I’m not flying all the way down that hole to revive you.”

“Fair enough.”

Taking a moment to gauge the distance, I put a hand on the ledge and vaulted over.  Almost immediately, I realized I’d put a little too much force into the jump.  Thank the Traveler for Lift.  Using the Light to defy gravity and physics, I slowed my descent and pushed myself back toward the wall.  I noticed an unwary Acolyte standing in the walkway.  Angling myself toward her, I braced for impact and lowered my shoulder, crashing into her just as she started to turn.  My momentum slammed us both into the opposite wall, and a quick punch was all it took to finish her off.  Unfortunately, I hadn’t noticed the others to the left.

There were two of them, and they opened fire immediately, energy rounds from their Shredders pelting the wall and floor near me before one caught me, lowering my shields.  I leaped backwards, rolling behind a column that jutted from the floor.  Needing a little more range than my shotgun provided I switched to my Haakon’s Hatchet, looking from cover to let loose a stream of armor piercing rounds.  The first Acolyte went down in a pile of ash, but the second had taken cover. A lot of movement on the tracker now.  Apparently the firefight had caught someone’s attention.

Darting from cover, I charged the Acolyte’s position, catching her off guard.  Pulling the trigger, I stitched a line of bullets from her chest up to her head, causing yet another burst of ash as she fell apart.  Screams echoed down the hallway as a line of red dots tracked their way toward me on my HUD.  More Thrall.  Focusing on the approaching mass, I missed the other shrieking sound mixed with their cries and didn’t see the ball of starfire coming at me until the Boomer round crashed into the ground at my feet, sending me flying backward to slam into the short wall separating me from the abyss. Arc energy sparked where I’d been standing and coursed over my armor, standing in stark contrast to the darkness closing in on me.

I shook my head, trying to clear cobwebs, and scrambled to my feet.  It had been a while since I’ve had my bell rung like that.  I didn’t have much time to recover, however, as the Thrall were on me.  I’d dropped my Hatchet when I’d taken the shot from the Knight, and didn’t have time to grab my shotgun.  Fists it would have to be.

I swung as hard as I could at the Thrall as they swarmed all over me, a writhing ball of teeth and claws.  Warnings sounded as my shields fell and I felt their claws trying to dig into my armor.  My fists connected with one and then another, beating them back and pushing them off of me, until the last one crumbled.  A loud shriek pierced the air again, but this time I was ready.  Tapping into the void energy, I thrust my arms outward, placing a Ward of Dawn around me just in time to watch the arc bolt slam harmlessly against its impenetrable shell.

The Light inside the shield invigorated me, giving me a moment to gain my bearings.  I picked up my Hatchet and gave it a quick once-over. Sloppy, letting that first shot rattle me that badly.  I was just lucky no one was around to see it happen, I would never hear the end of it.  No sooner had I thought it than a voice sounded in my coms.

“You could try not getting shot.  It would be better for the both of us.” Smart-aleck Ghost.

“Yeah, well, maybe after I throw you at him one of your points of conversation can be not killing me.”

The Knight stomped into view, lowering his arms and roaring out a challenge.  I decided to be friendly and wave.  That seemed to irritate him and he pulled up his Boomer, firing off another shot that splattered harmlessly again, though this time my Ward flickered a bit.

“Looks like it might be time to make a proper introduction.”

Charging out of my bubble, I peppered him with a quick burst of auto rifle fire before dropping my left hand and drawing on the Void again. Predictably, the Knight raised his arms to bring up his shield, but it wasn’t quick enough to stop the grenade I flung at him.  It connected to his chest and attached as the wall materialized in front of him, the grenade exploding twice in rapid succession.  He staggered, and another few rounds from my Hatchet brought him down. Time to move before anyone else came to see what was causing all the noise.

Something didn’t feel right about those last few shots, so I took a moment to have Elgan transmat my Hatchet back to the ship and bring me down my Inward Lamp.  Tuned for full auto, the scout rifle would get the job done with anymore rushing mobs of Thrall.  We hadn’t made it far down the corridor when my Ghost suddenly materialized in front of me.

“I’m detecting something,” he stated, a tint of excitement in his voice. Opening up to initiate a more active scan, he darted back and forth searching for the elusive trace of whatever he had noticed.  After several moments, he let out a whispered, “I don’t believe it,” then darted suddenly down a path leading away from the main hallway we were in.  I stood in shock for a moment, completely surprised, then sprinted after him.

He was flying too fast for me to catch on foot, so I leapt, using Lift to power myself down the hallway quickly.  I caromed off a wall as the hallway curved, spinning away from it and landing in a full sprint before rocketing forward again.  I finally gained enough ground to lunge forward and grab the Ghost, pulling him to me as we fell to the ground.  He instantly dematerialized, then reappeared above me and tried to take off again.

“Would you stop, you little idiot, you’re going to get us both killed,” I shouted, catching him again.  He pulled the dematerialization trick again, but this time, hovered above me, his optic sensor opened wide.

“We have to hurry,” he said, “it’s Ghosts.”

“What do you mean?”

“The phantom signal.  It’s Ghosts.  Dozens of them.  Their light is very faint, so very faint…”

“Then let’s go,” I replied, climbing to my feet.  Elgan disappeared into my armor, and a new target point appeared on my HUD.  Throwing caution to the wind, I ran down the hallway, trying to get to the Ghosts before we lost the signal again.  Red pinpoints began showing up as well, showing several Hive near our destination.  

I prepared a grenade and then burst into the room, glancing around quickly.  The room was circular, with two large columns on either side of the door.  On the opposite side of the room, there were at least four Wizards gathered around an unfamiliar construct, seemingly performing some sort of ritual.  I heaved my grenade in their direction just as one of the Wizards turned toward me.  I ducked behind the left column, the explosion drawing a scream of pain and anger from the Wizards.  A blast of darkness pummeled the pillar behind me and I leaned out to the left to fire off a few shots before darting to the right and taking cover behind the other column, taking a few more shots with my scout rifle.

The Wizard I’d caught with the grenade floated behind the other two, trying to use them as a shield.  A few well-placed shots dropped her solar shield, and another turned her to ash.  The three remaining enemies spread out then, seeking clear lanes of fire from multiple directions.  Switching to my shotgun, I charged the one to my right, sliding underneath her and firing upward, the solar rounds ripping through her shields and killing her quickly.  Two down, two to go. Unfortunately, that move left me exposed.

Something hit me from behind, and suddenly everything became hazy.  My movements became sluggish, and it felt as if something was draining me.  I pressed forward, seeking shelter, and cleared the poisonous cloud just as both Wizards unleashed more darkness, wiping my shields and staggering me.

Finally getting one of the columns between us, I let my shields recharge and decided to change tactics.  I switched to my WF47 machine gun, the “Zombie Apocalypse”.  Stepping back into the open, I let loose a torrent of solar skip rounds, the bullets tearing through the Wizards and bringing a quick end to the fight.  No sooner were they dead than my Ghost appeared, darting quickly to the Hive machine.  I set the heavy weapon down and followed.

“The signal was coming from here,” he said, zipping toward the back of the room.  “I’m not detecting any activity any longer, though there is a very unusual light signature coming from inside.”

The Wizards had been gathered around what looked like a large, concave table.  Hanging above it was a machine I had never seen before.  It was rectangular in shape, attached to the ceiling with wire, with four nasty looking needle-like points coming from each corner. Scattered in the depression of the table were weapons, armor pieces, and a pile of Ghosts.  None showed any sign of life.

“No, no, no,” Elgan whispered, moving to scan them, frantic for any sign of activity.  “They were alive; I know they were alive…”

Gently, I lifted one of the shells and looked it over.  On a hunch, I held it toward the dangling machine.  A strange glow lit a side panel, and light flickered in the Ghosts optic for a moment before shutting down again.  The starburst shape shuddered in my palm. I pulled my hand back, then repeated the gesture with the same response.

“I don’t think they were alive.  I think the Hive were trying to reanimate them somehow with this device.  Maybe to extract information.  Or try to taint the light in some way.”

“How could they do that?  The Ghosts came from the Traveler, there is no other Light…,” my Ghost trailed off for a moment before coming to a sudden realization.  “The strange light signature.  In the machine.  Claney, rip this thing apart, find it!”

“With pleasure,” I replied, setting the dead Ghost down before grabbing the device and yanking it from the ceiling.  I hammered it with my fists until a crack appeared, then put a hand to both sides and split it open.  The machine fizzled and sparked, and something hard and white fell out of it.

My Ghost swooped down to scan it and gasped.

“It’s a piece of the Traveler!”

“How is that possible?” I asked, kneeling down to look at the object.

“Checking,” he replied.  “Not too long ago, the Speaker had sent out an alert that it was suspected the Hive had a piece of the Traveler.  It was reported that a Guardian had assaulted a Hive coven and discovered that they had been syphoning the Light.  The Guardian stopped them, and the shard was restored, but it would seem that at least a small piece remained.  They could have small pieces like this all over the moon.  Maybe that is why the Traveler hasn’t recovered?”

“Maybe. We should definitely get this to the Speaker, and the Vanguard will want to look at the rest of this.  Let’s get it back to the shi…”

I was interrupted by the sound of a bullet ricocheting off the ground beside me.  Grabbing my rifle, I whirled toward the door to the room. At first, I could see nothing, then a Hunter de-cloaked and stepped forward, a sniper rifle resting against his shoulder.  He was glad in red and white with a glowing yellow-orange sash across his chest. The letters that blazed across his faceplate and the garish cloak he wore both marked him as an adherent of the Future War Cult.

“Easy, Titan.  If I just wanted to kill you, I could have.  I would prefer to end this amicably.  It would be a shame for all your hard work to end in easily avoided tragedy.”

“Hide,” I instructed my Ghost over a private comm channel, then addressed the Hunter.  “How thoughtful of you.  Call me crazy, though, I don’t tend to be on great terms with people who shoot at me unless we’re in the Crucible.  Even then, I tend to shoot back.”

The Hunter laughed and took a couple steps forward, hanging the sniper rifle on his back.  I shifted a little, tightening my grip on my weapon.  That stopped him.

“Fair enough.  Let me state things plainly.  I want what you have, and I am going to take it.  By force, if necessary.  I had been trying to track down the source of those phantom signals as well and saw you blundering your way through the Hive warrens.  Figured I would let you clear the path, and I do appreciate your effort, but I will be relieving you of your prize.”

“This belongs with the Vanguard.”

“And it will find its way there, after the War Cult has a look at it,” he stated, his tone of voice changing.  His posture shifted subtly as well, preparing to make his move.

“No. Elgan, prepare for transmat.”

“So be it,” the Hunter replied.

With that, he lunged forward, pulling out knives as arc energy coursed over his body.  I barely managed to dodge the first strike, which left a smoking gash in the table holding the artifacts.  I peppered him with shots from my Inward Lamp, vaulting myself up into the air with Lift, trying to keep out of his reach.  He leapt after me quicker than I had anticipated, striking me across the chest.  I landed hard, staggered, my shields depleted.  Regaining my footing, I readied a grenade and threw it at him, sticking him as he charged in again.  The resulting explosion threw us both backward.

For the second time today I slammed hard against a wall, my vision going dark again.  Maybe my brain would prefer to not be in my skull after all, if this was how I was going to treat it.  Staggering to my feet as quickly as I could, I saw my Ghost racing over to me.

“Are you okay?” he asked, giving me a quick scan.

“I’ll live.  What are you doing?  You were supposed to transmat that stuff out of here.”

“I…”

“Where’s the Hunter?” I demanded, cutting off whatever reply he was going to make.  I scrambled to my feet just in time to see a mocking salute from the Bladedancer as he and all the remains disappeared.

“No! Why didn’t you get that stuff out of here?”

“Well,” the Ghost replied, sounding more than a little snippy, “as I was going to say before you interrupted me, I sent up the fragment of the Traveler and most of the Ghosts.  I was having to recharge the transmat when I saw you take that hit.”

“Oh,” I responded sheepishly.  “In that case… Nice work.  Can you get us out of here?  We need to get that stuff to the Tower, and I am going to need to repair or replace this chest-plate.  Then we can see about tracking down a certain Hunter.”

“Of course it was ‘nice work’.  I did it.  And yes, I can.  Prepare for transmat.”

“I’m ready.  Let’s go home.”

Back aboard my Comitatus class ship, Invictus, I removed my helm and chest-plate.  Elgan plotted a course back to the Tower while I took stock of the damage.  I’d been lucky.  The arc blade had cut completely through the armor, another centimeter and it would have been in my chest.  Nothing but scrap now, I it aside and had a replacement piece sent to me from storage.  Elgan flitted over to me, giving the discarded armor a quick scan and then breaking it down into its component materials.

“What do you think the War Cult wants with the remains?”

“Hard to say,” he responded, turning to me, the points of his shell whirling around.  “They have been commissioning Guardians to check old files and bring back various items for a while now.  The different bits of alien hardware make sense.  The Ghosts that we found might have had some valuable information.  The different foundries have been producing items of such a higher quality than just about anything that would have been left from the Great Disaster that I can’t see what use they would have for the old armor and weapons.”

“And our friend?  Figure out who he was yet?”

“I am still working on that as well.  I’ve got it narrowed down to a few suspects.  Unfortunately, Faction gear makes visual identifiers a little more difficult.”

“Keep on it.  I’m going to close my eyes for a moment.  If I nod off, wake me when we get to the Tower.”

...

This is the first chapter to my longer fiction.  Don’t know if I’ll share more of it here.  I was originally written as a stand alone piece,but the next idea I had immediately followed up on it, so I just continued it instead.  This is one of my favorite bits of writing.  I wish I could say the rest of it was as strong as the start, but the quality varies a bit.  Link for the whole thing if you are so enclined: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11990180/1/A-Not-So-Simple-Patrol

[kittenwritesstuff]

Don’t let go

Fandom: Marvel Pairings: Steve Rogers x (mutant)reader; Wanda Maximoff x (sister)reader x Pietro Maximoff Genres: angst, mild fluff Words: 1.890 Summary: based on an imagine: “Imagine falling for Steve and your siblings, the twins, disapproving” - requested by Anonymous A/N: To avoid any misunderstandings, all characters are of age. Gif’s not mine.

Till this day, you have been convinced that you know fear.

You felt irrevocable terror when a bomb fell through the ceiling and Pietro scooped you and Wanda and held your small, fragile body against his chest as you waited for help to come.

You thought that you could not be more afraid but years later, when you and your older sibling were taken to Straker’s base, you were proven wrong. Dread was the feeling that took a residence in your mind and soul as you were exposed to Scepter’s power, changing you, destroying your every cell and rebuilding it anew.

Yet, you got used to it. Your screams and cries went by unanswered and so you stopped screaming. Only when your mind opened up and you began to hear voices you calmly asked for help because you were sure you were going crazy.

You didn’t. Straker was pleased to see that Scepter worked and gave you abilities that were off limits for ordinary men. You gained a power of strong telepathy, being a beautiful feature to your sister’s and your brother’s powers, as Strucker said. The three of you would change the world, he’d announced proudly but you already started to doubt in the whole thing.

You and your sibling willingly agreed to be lab rats in order to save your country but from what Strucker mentioned – and thought – their plans for you were slightly different.

However, try all your might, you could only wish for someone to appear and free the three of you. You were given a shackles from a weird metal to prevent you from running away, taking your brother and sister with you.

The chance came in a form of the Avengers. You never thought you would be so grateful for a man in a metal suit to appear and you were sure that Pietro and Wanda would be glad, too. They weren’t. Their first instinct was to follow orders, which was – attach the intruders.

You, on the other hand, couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You hid in a far corner of your cell, wanting to disappear but feeling too guilty for leaving your only family to actually do that. So you waited, until Pietro and Wanda came back and asked you to take them away.

And then… then it all went down too fast for you to stop it. Finding Ultron. Assaulting the Avengers again. Meeting Steve Rogers. Standing face to face with Vision, a brand new creation. Eventually, going against Ultron and tearing Sokovia apart.

After you learnt what Ultron really meant by ‘evolving’ you lost your hope. For a moment, there was nothing you could hold onto, nothing that would convince you that it would be better.

Nothing, until you met Steve. He became your guidance, your lantern of hope in all that darkness. He was gentle and kind, seeing past your mutation and what you did before. He understood and wasn’t afraid of you, unlike many people.

Yet, your brother and sister didn’t trust him. They seemed to believe only in what Hawkeye said but you didn’t blame them. The rest of the Avengers wanted to initially get rid of you, so their suspiciousness was understandable.

That’s why you are sitting now in your room in the Avenger’s Tower, wondering how the hell it all have happened. In which moment precisely your heart decided that it belongs to Steve Rogers. And how are you supposed to tell it to your sibling and to Steve?

Pietro will be furious. He’ll say that he’ll beat Captain’s ass if he ever touches you.

Wanda will be heartbroken. That you’ve chosen such a man to love, a national symbol of freedom, someone who maybe wouldn’t kill you easily, but let someone else do it. You know that Steve is more compassionate and moral but Wanda doesn’t.  

And Steve… Steve is a lost love-case. You can’t confess to him. How could he possibly be in love with you, an enhanced, who’s so much younger than him? He probably thinks of you as no one more than a sister.

The more you are thinking about it the more headache it gives you and you collapse onto your back, hiding your face in a pillow you’ve been holding.

It’s a stalemate situation, a deadlock of sorts and you have no idea how to solve it. Telling Steve seems right, but for how long can you hide your emotions from your sister? She’ll read you sooner or later and you don’t want to face her disappointment and hurt that you didn’t trust her enough to tell her.

“Wanda,” you send a thought, making sure that she’s alone.

“Yes, Y/N?” she responds, with a hint of worry in her thoughts and you sigh, a chaos taking over your mind for a brief moment.

She feels it and her concern grows.

“What’s wrong? Are you in pain?”

“Emotional, yes.”

“Who hurt you?”

“I did. There is something I need to tell you and Pietro, but I’m scared.”

“Scared of what? We’re family, Y/N, we won’t judge you.”

“Oh, but you will. This is something neither of you will approve of.”

“Do you want us to come over? Will it be easier?”

“Yes. Yes, I think it will,” you state, although not entirely positive if it really will. But you feel that it will be better if you talk to them face to face, not through thoughts. They deserve to hear it spoken aloud, not send to their minds, unprepared.

It takes them hardly five minutes to arrive at your room. Theirs are on higher floor; you chose the furthers and most secluded one, considering your ability to read minds. No one would feel comfortable, knowing that there is a telepath in next room.

You resume your sitting position, folding your hands on your lap, your fingers fidgety and palms clammy. You’re visibly struggling and it makes your sister’s face twist with fright and concern.

“What’s happening, mače (kitten)”, your brother asks, sitting next to you and you smile at the nickname he’s called you since you were little.

“I fell in love,” you murmur shyly, your pulse quickening to insane pace as you watch your siblings sporting the same confused yet happy expressions.

“That’s good, right?” Wanda crouches before you, taking your hands in hers.

“In Steve Rogers. I’m in love with Steve Rogers,” you say on one breath, scared that if you do it slower, you won’t have enough courage.

A dead silence falls in your room as if time stopped passing. Their eyes are wide, disbelieving and slightly anguished as thought you caused them pain with your confession.

“Does he know? Did you tell him?” Pietro inquires coldly after yet another minute of silence and you shake your head, unable to open your mouth.

“Good. We’re taking you from here.”

“No!” you protest, jumping on your feet and Pietro does too, in his usual super fast manner.

“I’m your older brother and I say you’re not going to stay here any longer! I will not let him come close to you!”

“I don’t need your permission!”

“Well, you don’t have one!” Wanda says, her voice low and full of anger as she stands by Pietro’s side, supporting him.

You fight away the urge to roll your eyes.

“I’m not going anywhere. There are people here who can help us! They treat us well, they teach us!”

“Don’t pretend you care about anyone else than Steve. He has blood on his hands, he’s no good for you!”

“Oh, so do we! We, too, killed people, don’t you remember? Have you forgotten what Strucker made us do?”

“What choice did we have, Y/N?”

“Don’t try to make me feel guilty, Wanda. I didn’t want it. I didn’t ask to love him.”

“Y/N-?”

“Go away. Both of you. I knew you would never approve. You have each other. You always did and you always will. I just wanted to have someone, too. Is it so hard to understand? Is it? That I feel lonely? That there’s no one to hug me?”

“We didn’t know-“ Pietro starts, wincing when he sees your tears.

“You want to protect me, and I appreciate that. You’re my family and I love you, but I didn’t choose to feel it. I didn’t. And all I wanted was for you to support me.”

“Y/N, we can’t support what can hurt you,” Wanda offers softly, taking a step towards you but you back away from her outstretched arms.

“Ultron could, and you came to him. Avengers could, yet you fight alongside with them. And Steve, he can’t hurt me because he doesn’t know. And don’t make me choose, because I won’t. It’s impossible.”

There’s no noise in the room apart from your sniffs and quiet sobs. Your face is hidden in your hands so you don’t see Wanda and Pietro but, frankly, you don’t want to. You can’t stand the betrayal that’s written on their faces.

You did nothing wrong. It’s not your fault. The heart wants what it wants, as they say, and you can’t fight it.

“I think… I think you should tell him.” Wanda forces out and you knit your brows, surprised by her words.

Pietro’s head jerks to the side to look at her and he seems to be even more shocked than you.

“What? I saw how he looks at Y/N, he’s… I think he may be in love with you, too.”

“Did you read his thoughts?” you ask, wiping at your cheeks and Wanda smiles.

“I might have, once or twice.”

You gasp, shaking your head, “oh, you!”

She only shrugs but before you can listen to whatever either of them adds, you’re out of your room, heading to Steve’s.

You take the steps two at a time, your heart racing wildly in your chest and you let the blockade you’ve put on your mind drop down, focusing your thoughts on Steve. He’s in his room, leaning over a sketchbook, drawing a portrait.

You take a glimpse on it and you halt in the middle of the corridor.

He’s drawing you.

“Steve,” you send a hesitant thought and there’s an alarm in his mind for a moment, before he recognizes you.

“Yes?”

“Can I come in?”

“Did you see it?”

“Yes.”

“Then you know you can.”

You take a deep breath as you resume walking towards his room, purposely going as slow as you can.

“Think for me, Steve.”

“What do you want to see?”

“How do I look in your eyes?”

“How far are you from my room?”

“Five more steps.”

“Can’t you go quicker?”

“What if I fall?”

“I’ll catch you, sweetheart.”

And so you jog to his door, opening it swiftly and closing your eyes to see only what Steve is seeing.

As his eyes land on you, standing still in his door, his heart skyrockets, his mind goes blank, leaving only you with a bright glow around your form. There is a warm feeling washing over him, an affection and adoration so strong it makes your head spin and you lose balance.

But Steve’s there to grasp you, holding you firmly against his chest.

“Gotcha,” he whispers as you open your eyes only to close them a moment later when he locks his lips with yours.