#forever a lost boy at last (john)

[puckishpixie]

((Thinking about maybe making Pixie's older brother a side character on the blog? Like, maybe not available for threads, but maybe open asks directed at him and stuff. Have him comment on things or talk about what it was like being a parent to his sister.

I even found a good faceclaim for him;

John has pink hair like his sister and wears thick plastic glasses. He doesn't have wings, Pixie got those from her father, but there is a definite family resemblance.))

[dreameryfics]

JJ MAYBANK x READER

Summary: JJ has loved you for years, but only now do you realize it

We had just got back to the island from Charleston. John B and Sarah were back home, safe. We had the night, one night where everything felt normal, or at least our normal. John B was still wanted for a murder he didn't commit. We all decided that would be a tomorrow problem, tonight though, was for us.

We were all hanging in the backyard, JJ, Pope, and I all in the hot tub. It was more just a small pool now as the hot tub part didn't work anymore. Kie and Sarah were sitting by the fire; Kie playing the ukulele and Sarah fiddling with the small bandana around her neck. John B was looking at the tribute we made for him, realizing how real it was for us. I made my way out of the 'hot tub' and over to my brother.

I stood beside him, resting my head on his shoulder. "I thought you were dead, I thought I lost my brother and best friend all in one go. After Dad," I choked up, "I couldn't bear the thought of you being gone too."

"Hey," he turned towards me, placing his hands on my shoulders, "I'm here. You can't get rid of me that easily sis." He pulls me in for a hug, one I knew we both desperately needed. We stay like that for a while before we hear rustling behind us. We turn around and see JJ walking over. “I’ll talk to you later,” I tell my brother, knowing him and JJ needed some time to talk.

I walk and sit next to Sarah, her glancing over at me. Sarah and I had always been friends, even before she met John B. She was always nice to me and knew that being a Kook didn’t make her any better than the rest of us; a concept I wish the other Kook’s would understand.

“I need to tell you something,” she blurted out, facing me now. I turned towards her and she went on, “ John B and I kind of got married.”

“What!?!” I yell out. “Shhh- don’t be so damn loud,” she shushed me. “Sorry, but you can’t expect me to not react that way when he’s my brother and you’re, well you.” I chuckle at her, noticing she’s looking over at John B now. I can see it in her eyes, she loves him; and more than just a high school type of love, a forever love. They’re endgame. “Sarah, I’m so happy for you,” I reach over and grab her hands, “and now I have a sister-in-law! Tell me everything! How exactly do two presumed dead teens get married in a foreign country?”

“Well, it was technically in the middle of the ocean, so legal, not likely, but it is to us,” she told me causing me to let out a slight chuckle. “We’re gonna get a dog,” she said the last part louder. I looked over and saw John B walking towards us, shaking his head at her. “Sarah, not anytime soon. We have to get the gold from Ward first,” he said very matter of fact, “and then full Kook!”

“So, Kie, what’s happening with you and Pope?” Sarah asks pointing over to Pope looking at her. “I don’t know honestly, but I think it might be something.”

“That’s,” I pause trying to find the right word, “vague as fuck, Kie.” We all chuckle knowing that she’ll tell us when she’s up to it and when she knows more about her feelings. She flips me off before getting up and putting on some music.

Sarah and I stood up and went over to Kie, the boys taking our spots we were just at. The three of us started dancing to the rhythm of the music, just enjoying life. I can’t dance, but it doesn’t matter because tonight is just about us all being together. After about three songs, Kie comes over and nudges my shoulder, “look who can’t keep their eyes off of you,” she says looking over to JJ.

I look over at him and see him staring at me. Once he sees me looking at him, he gets the smallest smile on his face and shakes his head at me causing me to blush. “He’s just happy we’re all together again,” I tell Kie, “ don’t read into it. He doesn’t like me like that.” I look down, wanting Kie to be right but knowing he probably just sees me as John B’s little sister.

“Trust me on this one, friends don’t look at each other like that,” she whispers to me before dancing over to Sarah. I glance over at JJ and see him looking at me again. The next song that comes on from Kie’s playlist is a slower song. I see Sarah walk over to John B, hands outstretched, as he stands to grab her arms and pulls her into a hug. Sarah puts her arms around John B’s neck and he places his hands around her waist. She rests her head on his chest and I can see all the trouble and fear just melt away from my brother’s face.

I was about to walk over to grab another beer from the cooler when I heard someone clear their throat behind me. I turn around and see JJ, “Care to dance with me malady?” He reaches his hand out and bends down slowly. “I thought you’d never ask,” I reply taking his hand and curtsying. We both chuckle and walk hand in hand to where I was just at. I repeat Sarah’s actions and place my arms around his neck and he places his hands on my sides.

“I can’t believe they’re back,” he says looking down at me. JJ had been having a really hard time with John B being missing. He got himself fired after arguing with one of the Kooks about John B being innocent. He didn’t tell anybody else, but he started having small panic attacks. He wasn’t staying at his place anymore, not wanting to be alone so he would often sleep on the couch at the Chateau. “Me either, I’m so fucking overjoyed they’re back. I honestly didn’t know what I was going to do if we hadn’t gotten that text from them.”

“I didn’t either,” he says looking down at me, “I’m just happy I had you.” I could feel the heat rise to my face, maybe Kie was right. “Can I tell you something?” I looked up at him and nod my head. “I don’t want what I’m about to say change anything, but with what’s all happened, I can’t just keep quiet. I love you. I need you to know that in case everything goes to shit and I never get the chance to tell you.” I’m taken aback by his sudden outburst of honesty. We are both now just standing there, not realizing that the rest of the group had taken notice to what was happening.

I didn’t reply right away, not being prepared for this. “Fuck, I shouldn’t have said anything,” he said before turning away from me and running his fingers through his hair. “JJ-“ I grab his shoulder to make him turn back towards me. I did the only thing that felt right in the moment, I kissed him. He questioned it for the slightest second before kissing me back. I heard the hoots and hollers from the rest of the group, but all I could focus on was him. This was all that mattered to me in this moment. I pulled away, placing my hand in his, “I love you too.” He pulled me into the biggest and warmest bear hug.

“But what about the no pogue on pogue rule,” I say, still hugging him. He lets out a low chuckle before pulling apart and looking to John B. “He’s actually okay with this,” I look over at my brother, completely surprised at this statement. “What do you think we were talking about before sis?” John B says to me, “I couldn’t bear to watch you two miss your opportunity to be together all because of a stupid rule we made up.” I give him a smile before resting my head on JJ’s chest.

“Told you,” Kie said to me before grabbing another beer and tossing it to me. I stuck my tongue out at her and caught the beer, opening it and taking a sip.

We spent the rest of the night drinking and dancing. Kie and Pope left us. It wasn’t long before our whole world came crashing down around us as two people came looking for John B and Sarah; non other than Barry and Rafe Cameron himself. Maybe we won’t get one night, but we got a few moments, the best moments I would say.

Tomorrow: clearing John B’s name and figuring out what JJ and my first date is going to be. The former is obviously more important, but I can dream.

[i-love-you-just-the-same]

road trip with the 141??

they all take turns driving. it's a long haul, almost two days worth of sitting in the car. lucky the group has little trips planned (things they each think you'll enjoy) on the way to the real destination.

price takes the first shift. they all insist on letting you have the passenger seat, even if simon is squished in the back middle. john lets you pick the music, rests his hand on your thigh, drawing pictures with his thumb on the inside. he asks you to amble on about whatever and interjects with questions or comment when he's intrigued. john is a good driver, even when he's not fully paying attention to the road. he doesn't rage externally when he's cut off or when someone starts to tailgate him (he's memorizing their plate to have someone steal their identity later), just listens to your pretty voice ask him about future plans. he holds you hand when you all stop at a botanical garden around lunch. raises an eyebrow to soap when you pull him around to show him another flower, conveying that johnny was wrong and you do like this kind of thing. kisses your forehead when he moves to the backseat.

johnny takes up the next shift. he yaps and changes the radio station every five minutes. makes simon (who gaz is napping on) mad every time he misses a turn. johnny moves his hand scandalously low on your thigh every time he thinks you won't notice before you move it back to the wheel. asks you to change the air conditionings temperature every time he gets slightly uncomfortable. he grins when you feed him bits of his granola bar. overall, johnny is not an awesome driver and doesn't really pay attention to the road, so it's not a big surprise when he's kicked out of the big seat. johnny's delighted with how you like the waterfall trail he suggested. the group gets loads of pictures that will eventually get compiled into a photo album.

gaz climbs in the driver's seat and places a little kiss on your cheek. he's the forever gentleman and a little overindulgent. he lets you put your feet on the dash and would let you paint your nails if you had any polish, even if he hates the smell. kyle enjoys idle conversation with his darling, about that random bird or why would someone paint their barn that ugly orange? he strokes your thigh with his hand or holds your hand on the gearshift. that evening when you all go for dinner, he diverts for a quick trip to the local art show and farmers market. kyle follows you around for the evening like a lost puppy, offering to buy anything that catches your interest and carrying your bag. pleased when you buy a postcard of your favorite piece from the evening, just wants to take his doll out and let them have a good time.

simon offers to drive the last hundred or so miles to the motel you all planned to stay in for the night. he opens your door and kisses your fingertips before putting the vehicle in reverse. the other three are asleep by the time you pull back out, but you and him enjoy the time looking at the stars. simon tells you all the constellations he knows, and tries to help map them best he can while driving. simon's a horrible driver, but the road is pretty empty by the time he gets on. spontaneously, he pulls to the side of the road where there's a wide open field. grabs your hand and locks the boys in. simon takes you in the field and wraps his arms around you. you both sway in the moonlight, humming along to some long forgotten tune. he mumbles that he loves you and kisses your mouth softly. you two don't stay out there long because of the boys in the car and how late it is, but he still picks you a bouquet of flowers from the field.

the motel bed is small, but you all make yourselves fit. technically there's two, but no one is figuring out the logistics of that at this hour. soap has a hand in yours, gaz's leg is wrapped around your lower half, simon's heart beats steadily under your ear, and price has his front to your back. you all are tangled up together and couldn't be happier.

[mrsparrasblog]

I just listened to "My Tears Ricochet" and had an idea.

TW: Angst *laughs in free therapy*

So, imagine the boys need to fake their deaths. How macabre it is that they attend their own funerals, wanting to watch their loved ones. (These are standalone scenarios they don't fake their death together)

Price: You were his wife for all these years, always waiting for him to return. The funny thing was you could clearly remember the last argument before he left.

"Love, just one more tour, and I'm coming back to you. Then we can start a family and all that, but the boys need me."

"It's always the last tour with you. When is it really the last?"

"This time, I promise."

To some extent, he was right. You thought it was his last tour, but it wasn’t fair. You knew it was over when you got the call from General Shepard. Your husband was dead. You lost the love of your life, and all you got were his dog tags and a check large enough to end world hunger. You slapped your friend after she said at least you were financially secure now.

Price watched you from behind a tree. He saw how you clung to his grave, hugging it tightly and lying on it as you always used to with him. Your dress was dirty, and the tears wouldn’t come anymore.

When Laswell and Nik approached you, you screamed at them, blaming them for not protecting your husband. You trusted them, and now you couldn't bear to let anyone else near his grave. John wished he could comfort you, tell you he would come back to protect you, but he couldn’t. Instead, he sent Simon, who endured all your insults, screams, and even a punch to his crooked nose until you were ready to move on.

Kyle: You and Kyle were born on the same day, in the same room, in the same hospital. It was like a movie; he was your best friend since forever, your first everything, and you were his. It was a love like in all those movies. The only thing separating you was the military, but you stayed home waiting for him. Not even war could separate you. Last year, he brought you that ring. You remember lying in bed, cuddling him as he promised you that you were allowed to die first. He knew you wouldn’t survive his death. So he made the silly promise that you would die first. He thought it was the first promise he ever broke to you.

Kyle had to be held back when he saw you crying at his grave. “Guess I’ll find you in the next one, love. Sleep well.”

Ghost: He was never good at love, and he was sure no one would come to his funeral. No one knew "Ghost," and Simon Riley had been buried since 2009. But then he saw you, the cute medic he always tried to push away. He was afraid of hurting you or corrupting you. How could he have known that pushing you away wouldn’t stop you from loving a dead man?

All the conversations came flooding back:

"Here, Lt. I made you red velvet cookies, your favorite."

"You're going to sit down and let me fix that, idiot."

"You're beautiful, Ghost."

"You're enough."

"It's kind of silly to be in love with someone whose name you didn’t even know. I hope you find your peace, big boy." You placed lilies on his grave and left. In that moment, Simon Riley realized he was loved, and he would burn the world down to come back from the dead just to return to you.

Johnny: Contrary to popular belief among the team, Johnny wasn’t a whore. He was a loving husband and father. That was written above "Sergeant" on his grave, at least.

His funeral was crowded with people who wanted to pay their last respects. Most of them were blue-eyed MacTavishes. Then there was you, holding your three-year-old in your arms. He didn’t understand why everyone was crying or why Dad wasn’t there anymore.

Johnny watched you sit at his grave, sighing as you talked to your husband. "James doesn’t understand what’s going on, but he misses you. He wanted me to give him a mohawk. It looks ridiculous, just like you. I know you’re rocking it in heaven. Just please wait for me, okay? Don’t want you to hoe around in heaven," you chuckled, holding back the tears. "You watch us from there, right? Can’t miss the birth of your princess, can you?"

[grapejuicestyless]

Pay The Price

JJ Maybank x fem!reader

Summery: Karma is real, and those who do bad have to pay the price for it. But, sometimes, those who don’t do anything at all pay for the crimes the bad people commit.

He said she would pay. From the moment she watched Kiara shove the blonde boy with the short buzz cut off of the bow of the ship, and he surfaced screaming indecent words through the water that poured into his mouth, she knew just how much truth he held in those words.

Kiara was safe, but it always worked out that way for her. Rafe had said it best. Though by choice, she was a Pogue, by nature, she would always be a Kook. Until all the money she once had was used dry, she would never stoop down to the levels of desperation that her friends had. And because of that, Rafe held a soft spot for the curly headed girl.

She never believed he had the heart to go through with it though. Rafe wasn’t a good person. His hands were doused in mass amounts of blood that he proclaimed were necessary for the success of his survival and the growth of his future. Yet, all the death seemed unnecessary when the same prosperities were achieved through the act of simple, honest affection snd care towards those who can only help you. Still, though they shared different perspectives, Y/n sympathized with the broken boy.

He would always be the shell of a man. A young Kook who was desperately grasping onto broken baggies filled with snow and loud party music to drown out the absence of his father. He cried for help, and yet his desperate pleas were met with nothing but silence.

And so, the only response he ever got from his father would forever ring through his head. And the primal urge to fulfill what his father believed he needed to be rained supreme over whatever shreds of goodness remained within him.

Y/n went with John B that day, and JJ had pleaded for her to stay, an unease that refused to settle deep within his stomach. He gripped onto the sleeves of her shirt that once belonged to him and begged for her to stay because if Singh couldn’t manage to stick a knife through his heart, the idea of getting lost again would kill him.

“Hey, you know me.” She promised him softly in the evening light, the soft humming of the boat vibrating the pristinely white floors. “I’ll come back.”

He believed her. He hung onto every promise she ever made because it was true. If JJ knew nothing, he knew her. He knew there was no way she would turn away from him, because he knew just how hard she had always tried to make him feel seen. So he let go of her hands for the last time that day, trusting her completely that this was the right thing to do, and she towed behind John B the entire trudge to the old church where he swore he heard his father calling for him.

But JJ shouldn’t have trusted her, not because she hadn’t proven herself to him, but because she was selflessly following one of her best friends into an unknown territory lined with threats where if it truly came down to it, he would choose to save his father every damn time.

The pleasantries were nice, for a moment. The tight hug and the teary eyes as a father and son reunited. But soon, extra footsteps rang through the old church, but not those that were welcome. They were loud, unholy, threatening. Those of a sinner. Though, looking back now, if she knew what she would have known now, Y/n would’ve known that there was never a single saint standing beside her that day.

They ran, through the thick tree lined roads and down the uneven, rocky paths where no cars could reach. Though, that seemed to be untrue because right behind there trailed two black SUV’s that looked striking similar to those that had imprisoned Kiara and Y/n just mere hours ago.

“John B, run!” She cried out behind him, her hand splayed out on his back to shove him forward towards the small clearing between the wet brush. It was getting dark quickly, colder, even in such a warm climate the chill was getting to them. Their noses were turning red and the skin was forming small bumps across the span of their entire bodies.

They made a turn to loose them, one quick turn that should have granted them freedom. Y/n followed John B blindly, secure in her trust that he would never lead her into danger, but John B was just as blind as she was. The blind leading the blind into a darkness neither of them could navigate.

They were so close when suddenly, her foot caught onto a rock. A wet slab of earth sending her falling down the slick hill and separating her from John B. He called out for her, a soft groan echoing from the bottom of the hill. She was bleeding from her temple, a scratch against the skin that leaked in thin streams of crimson down the curve of her cheek and dripped off the edge of her jawline. She could barely make out anything around her, she was just getting a grasp of her surroundings.

She thought he’d come to get her when she saw the tall frame standing in front of her. The much larger, warm hand grasped her cold hand, pulling her up on her wobbly knees. Y/n wanted to breathe out her thanks to her savior, to hold onto him and pull him close. But it was so dark, he was only a shadow, only the ghost of the person she thought she’d seen.

“Checkmate, bitch.” The voice teased softly, the voice that Y/n associated with the Kook from figure eight that she often found herself sympathizing with in her daydreams.

“W-what?” She stuttered out, trying to step back only for his arm to wrap tightly around the small of her back. It was a threat wrapped around a wet dream, the idea of being held so intimately, so protected by the enemy, but to feel every tender touch like a threat made her blood run cold.

When John B finally made his way down the hill, he didn’t see the same man that Y/n had looked at with terror. He saw the aftermath of her punishment.

Sitting underneath a low hanging tree, the heavy branches dripping onto the ground around her, Y/n sat folded nearly in half, just half of the girl she was a few minutes ago. Slumped over, her knuckles gripping onto the leaves, her hair hung over her face, hiding the maroon that stained her skin and the hole that left her breathless.

“Hey, hey, you okay?” John B kneeled on front of the girl, someone he often saw as the sister he never got. Often, they curled up in bed together when they were still young, sharing pajamas and exchanging stories from their day, as if they hadn’t been attached at the hip for the entirety of it.

He didn’t see it at first, how her hand covered her stomach in pain, the shakiness of her limps and the uneven pressure she applied with her weakening fingers. She tilted her head back slowly, finding a nice resting place against the dying bark.

Her eyes were glossy, clouded over in a dark pain John B had only seen once before. A pain that ended in a murder trial and the haunting image of the old sheriff bleeding out on the tarmac. She let out a choked breath, her mouth opening and squeezing shut to catch her breath, desperate to keep whatever little oxygen she could retain.

“Hey…hey, Y/n/n, what’s going on?” He questioned, oblivious to the main issue right below his nose. But it was so dark, so incredibly dark, it was a miracle in itself he could find her at all through the winding brush.

“I’m okay, I’m okay.” She spoke in one breath, but the instability of the volume of her voice gave away the weakness in her bones, as the choked out gasps of pain alerted John B to where her bloody hand laid covering the wound that leaked through the thin fabric adorning her fragile body.

“Shit…hey, no, come on, we gotta go. We gotta get you help.” John B tried to lift her immediately after spotting the dark spot spreading on her abdomen, but her shrieks of pain made him stop, and she begged him to put her down.

“John B, we got to go, boy.” Big John rasped, but it fell on deaf ears, the ringing echoing through John B’s mind so loud, it drowned out even the threatening sounds of the SUV’s tires scraping against the mud.

“Rafe got me good, huh?” She hiccuped with a weak smile, eyes looking up at the sky, her final destination. She couldn’t bear to witness the grief in her friend’s eyes.

“I guess he was right.” She coughed, and with her bubbling breath, a thin line of her blood trickled down the center of her chin, a splatter of blood dripping down her shirt. “I really did pay for it.”

She laughed it off, her dying. She laughed because she thought that if she took it a little less seriously, then maybe John B would be less inclined to grieve for so long.

“No, you won’t. We’ll carry you to a boat, and we’ll get you help back in Kildare, okay?” John B planned it out like it was promised, but the knife was twisted deeply beneath her skin, the crunching sounds still playing on a loop in the back of her mind.

Y/n shook her head weakly, and the wetness that rimmed her eyes spilt down all at once. She smiled through the whole process, the feeling of her chest expanding, and then quickly imploding. The squeezing of her lungs beneath her ribs, the cracking of her heart as it began to slow. Her eyes felt heavy, and so did her body. She let her hand fall limp to her side, no longer trying to stop the bleeding that couldn’t be prevented.

“John B, you got to listen to me.” Y/n snapped John B out of his useless plans and breathless rambling. When they locked eyes, they both knew it would be for the last time, and reality hit them both hard, and John B gave up on any schemes he could have conjured up in her final moments.

“T-tell them I ran off.” She pleaded softly. “Tell them you lost me on the way back, that I made my escape and I abandoned you.”

“What? No, why?” He couldn’t understand it. They would resent her for it. No—JJ would hate her forever for it. Why would she take an eternity of hatred to spare the guilt from John B. To protect him from the potential blame the others might try and place on him.

“Please, just promise me. Promise me you’ll tell JJ, okay?” She coughed weakly, and neither of them could tell if what stained her face was blood, tears, or saliva, but John B wiped it off of her pretty face anyway.

“Tell him that I love him, okay?” She hiccuped through her tears, her weak smile turning more into clenched teeth and furrowed brows. This wasn’t peace, because if it were, JJ would have been the one to hold her, and her friends would be the ones looking down at her with smiles knowing that she had been at ease with her leaving, not Big John.

“Tell him yourself.” John B tried to argue.

Y/n shook her head.

“Please, tell him for me, okay?” She whined, the light behind her eyes fading.

“John B, we gotta get out of here, son.” Big John spoke up, the sound of footsteps crunching beneath the leaves only growing closer. It settled in then that there was no way he could lift her over his shoulder. She would be dead in minutes, and in the end it would only kill him too. He had to live to tell her story.

“Okay.” He nodded his head, pressing a kiss to the center of her forehead with wobbling lips.

“P4L.” She smiled, even as her eyes fluttered shut, it never faltered. Not until the last breath squeezed its way out of her lungs and her muscles died along side her.

He wanted to scream, to kick something, to do something, but it was just him and his dad now. A trade he didn’t know he was making when he abandoned the others on the stolen yacht, a sacrifice the others would never know about.

Even as the pair silently sailed back to the familiarity of their home, they sat in silence, which was weird because John B had always envisioned the second they reunited, it would be filled with laughter and memories. Now, as he looked at his father, all he saw was the haunting reminder that his family was no longer with him. That no matter where he put the grave, and no matter how beautiful he made it, he would never be close to her again, and he would never even know where to look to find something like her again.

When John B returned back to the safety of the overgrown greenery and the old, worn in hammock that hung in the backyard of the Chateau, suddenly, he realized it had lost its charming appeal. It didn’t feel like home anymore, it felt empty. And the sad expression on his face remained stuck as he leaned off the edge of the dock to wash the red out from under his nails.

Her body was forever lost, but her blood ran deep between the waves of the ocean back home, and it always would.

When the others slowly filed into the backyard like old times, it was the first question on their tongues. “Where’s Y/n?” And it was a question that John B hesitated on.

He almost told them the truth as they all sat around the fire, it danced on the tip of his tongue. But then, he locked eyes with JJ, and her final words rang through his mind.

“She uh…she ran off. Decided to take her chances on her own.” John B lied though his teeth, and when he locked eyes with the broken gaze of the tow headed blonde across from him, for some odd reason he couldn’t bring himself to tell his best friend that she loved him.

It was selfish, maybe, to reject the dying wish of someone so deeply loved and special to him. But in some twisted, messed up way, to John B, if he ignored it, if he waited to tell JJ what she had said, then it meant that she wasn’t really gone. She would still be alive, just far away like his lie foretold, as long as he didn’t treat it like she had died.

“No, man you’re lying. Come on, where is she?” JJ laughed through the heavy silence, clapping his dry hands together and standing up so quickly, the stool beneath him toppled over into the dirt.

John B just looked down between his thighs and shook his head.

“Y/n wouldn’t do that, okay? I know her, and she wouldn’t do that.” He argued with wild eyes. John B may have grown up with her, but JJ was always the closest to her, an extension of each other. They practically hung off of each other’s arms. The image of her head up upon JJ’s shoulder, resting happily during annual fire pit nights was comforting and not at all rare. He should’ve known he wouldn’t believe she would abandon any of them for a second.

“Well she did, JJ, okay?” He wasn’t sure why he snapped at him, it wasn’t his fault she wasn’t there. His anger couldn’t fill her absence better than silence could, yet the wound was still fresh, and he couldn’t even close his eyes to blink without seeing the fading smile from her paling face. Her death.

JJ didn’t stick around long after that, going to god knows where to do god knows what. Someone should have grabbed onto him. Y/n would have. She would have talked to him like nobody else existed, because nobody else mattered but them in that moment. She would have stopped him and held him in a way he allowed no other. But she wasn’t here now, as odd as it felt to admit, even in John B’s head, and so nobody even tried when he stormed off into the sweltering night.

“The storms coming quickly, this isn’t looking good.” Pope observed obviously from behind the wheel of the rusted fishing boat Rafe had borrowed from his old drug dealer. It was a sketchy deal, but a desperate one to lead the even more desperate Pogues to the sandy shores of Morocco.

“No shit, we’re not prepared for this.” Kiara added sarcastically. Her knuckles white against the edge of the small table shoved in the corner. There was a card game left unfinished sprawled over the old wood, the uneven sea making both Kiara and Sarah too anxious to try and continue.

“This was a bad idea.” Sarah pointed out the obvious.

“Tell me something I don’t know.” Cleo sighed, pulling down every lever that she recognized to help stabilize the boat.

“Do you know what you’re doing?” Sarah asked nervously as she observed the frantic girl.

“I know enough!” Cleo shot back all too sharply.

“Y/n would know what to do.” Sarah swallowed, and the air in the small cabin seemed to grow heavier. In that moment, everyone as a collective was glad JJ was out on the open deck getting wasted by the hands of an old bottle of Hennessy stashed away on the boat.

He would’ve sneered and laughed bitterly about how Y/n wasn’t here anymore. How she chose to leave, how she didn’t matter anymore. They all recognized it as a projection. The truth was, JJ still loved that girl deeply, but it was all too well known that the blonde boy always ran from his terrifyingly strong emotions and pushed the blame to those who didn’t deserve it.

The thought reminded John B that the boy was out in the approaching storm, and after some internal debate on whether to leave him out there in the fresh air or to drag him into the warm dry cabin, he decided on the latter. Though, he was sure the boy could have survived the violent weather, he always did have the survival instincts of a cockroach.

“JJ!” John B called out, careful of the wet spots on the deck as rain misted down onto his tan skin. Not far from him stood his best friend, a nearly empty bottle dangled loosely in his hand and his legs crossed carelessly against some stacked barrels. He looked out at the violent waves, seemingly at peace with it.

“C’mon man, it’s getting pretty bad out here.” John B said, clapping a hand over his shoulder. The blonde simply shook it off.

“Nah.” He said plainly. His breath reeked of alcohol. “I’m good.”

“JJ, dude seriously, come on. You’ll die out here.” John B laughed. JJ didn’t seem to find it funny.

“No, I’m serious man, go on in. I’m good out here.” JJ smiled, his hands clinging onto John B’s shirt all while drunkenly taking another swig of the nearly empty drink in between his knuckles.

John B wasn’t having it, pulling him along only for the heels of JJ’s boots to dig into the rotting wood, stopping both of them in a harsh halt.

“Come on man, what’s your problem?”

“What my problem? Why can’t you just leave me alone?” JJ argued back. “Theres no harm in me staying out here, alright? I’m just a dead weight anyways.”

It was moments like this that John B prayed for Y/n the most. It was times like this when JJ was nearly unretrievable from his state of self deprecation that Y/n managed to pull him from every damn time. But Y/n wasn’t here, and John B had only one last card left to play.

“Actually, I have something to tell you.” John B spoke. Granted, in hindsight, now was not the time to show off his good fortune, the success of his relationship and how easily his life seemed to be falling into perfect place. Yet, it was all he could think of to pull JJ out of his slump like trance.

“I’m gonna be a dad.” John B said proudly, and when he was met with no response, his smile faltered for a moment before he continued speaking. “You’re like my brother, JJ, I’ve known you since third grade. Sarah and I want you to be the Godfather. I can’t imagine anyone else doing it.”

JJ shook his head quickly. “You wouldn’t want me around that kid, John B. I promise you that.” He took another large gulp of the alcohol.

“JJ I…I literally just asked you to be the Godfather, what are you talking about?”

“John B, what do you know about raising a kid, huh?” JJ cut his friend off suddenly, snapping at the mere mention of anything changing within the group. It was almost like it hurt him to imagine having to shift the dynamics once again.

“Not a single thing, JJ!” John B argued back quickly, trying to keep his cool.

“Exactly.” JJ raised a finger to John B’s face, the bottle swishing around tauntingly between the pair. “No exactly, alright? You don’t know shit. You’re gonna screw up this kid just like my old man screwed me up.”

“Thats what you’re gonna go on about?” John B tried to talk over JJ, but it was useless.

“Just like your old man screwed you up.”

“Stop.” John B warned, looking towards the sky for strength.

“And whats worse, is you’re gonna put Sarah through that!”

“Hey!” John B shoved JJ backwards slightly, his brows furrowed in a deep frown.

With one small step forward, John B’s hands were on JJ’s chest, grabbing at the fabric of his shirt until he was pressed against a nearby crate, leaning back with his eyes focused on his best friends face.

“Chill out, hey, chill out, okay?” John B said firmly, his grasp not letting up.

JJ simply threw his head back and laughed. He laughed like it was all some joke, like it was funny to him. But it wasn’t. None of this was. Not the fact that he was going to be a father so young, not the fact that they were heading into a storm, and certainly not the fact that Y/n was dead.

“Yeah, John B. You’re gonna be a great dad.” JJ smiled sarcastically, his tone bitter and condescending.

“I am gonna be a good dad.” John B nodded solemnly, his eyes fixed on the drunken glaze that covered the blues of his friends.

He wanted to leave then, he nearly decided that it wasn’t worth it anymore. For a second, he let the bad thoughts in, he let himself sit with the idea that maybe JJ should just sit out in the cold and let the waves take him. But what good would it do for any of them. John B didn’t want his other best friend dead, not when he knew it was all only just projections he was receiving from JJ.

JJ was sad deep down, and he knew it. He knew that JJ was jealous, angry, bitter. He had every right to be. That was supposed to be him after all. Him and Y/n, happy as can be, traveling the world together and surfing the tasty waves that crashed onto foreign shores.

He stopped himself before he could get beyond the threshold, pausing as he thought over his words. The very phrase he was never able to confess to JJ, the phrase that held the last remains of life in his heart, and the only living piece of Y/n he selfishly kept to himself.

“She loved you, you know.” John B broken the silence once more. He closed his eyes to not cry, but still he couldn’t face his best friend.

“What’re you one about now, huh?” JJ chuckled, the now empty bottle placed down firmly behind him. Heavy footsteps only grew closer behind John B, and it wouldn’t be long before he knew he would have to face him, see the pain spread across his friend’s face at the truth.

“Y/n.” John B said plainly, turning on his heals to look at JJ with glassy eyes. “She told me to tell you before she…”

“Before she left?” JJ finished John B’s sentence, throwing his head back for the millionth time and looking at his friend with a mix of anger and sadness.

For the first time in years, John B shook his head in denial for the narrative he had accidentally painted for JJ, all while trying to get over his own grief that was slowly consuming him.

“No.” John B breathed out. “Before she died.”

“Bullshit, she left, remember? Just like the spanish, she fuckin’…packed her shit and left you for the wolves, right?” JJ sputtered, his eyes now filled with something more than drunken frustration, but pure disbelief.

“JJ, Y/n is dead.” John B finally confessed, and he swore he felt his chest growing heavier, smaller, the air thicker. “She made me…” He hesitated on his words. “She made me promise to tell you that she ran away. And that she loved you…that she loves you.”

John B corrected himself like she was still alive. Though the prominent ache in his chest was enough proof that Y/n was gone. Even just speaking about it, he felt himself growing teary eyed. He felt the lump in his throat expanding as it rose, threatening to come out in a sob.

He couldn’t look, but if he had the courage to, he would have seen the same expression on JJ’s face. The grief, the loss, the pain. Only, on him, it seemed to run much deeper than John B.

“How?” JJ asked finally, breaking the silence that was growing increasingly heavier as time passed.

“We were trying to get away…the…Singhs men found us and we were running. At some point I…I lost her I guess and when I found her, she was…she was already beyond saving.” John B confessed softly.

JJ’s breath hitched, imagining the scenario in his head. He could see it now, her poor body sat in the mud, her desperate eyes looking for the familiar face of a friend, only to be met with darkness. His heart clenched tightly in his chest.

“Was she scared?” JJ let out a shaky breath he didn’t know he was holding.

“If she was she didn’t show it.” John B said, and JJ let out a weak laugh.

“Typical.” It made John B laugh too.

“Yeah.”

Silence fell over the pair again, the cold air suddenly nice against the heat that was burning in both of their chests.

“She…she was sorry, for leaving. For not getting to say goodbye.” John B told JJ calmly, using his palms to swipe away any tears that threatened to fall.

“Did she…did she say how it happened? Did you see? How she died?”

John B swallowed hard, vaguely aware of the blonde with the same threatening buzzcut that sat chained up just below the deck, but completely aware that the minute the truth came out, the culprit would finally get what he deserved for his crimes. A punishment John B had always been to intimidated to enact.

“She was stabbed. The guy twisted the knife and everything. She lost so much blood by the time I got there and she…she said that…she paid for it. She had it coming. That…” Even now, certain that he wanted to get the truth out, the name got stuck in his throat. “That Rafe got her good.”

JJ said nothing as he pieced together the scene, sobering up almost instantly. Not only was he reeling in the guilt of losing his best friend—no, the love of his life, but also in the fact that he had blamed her for something someone else had inflicted upon her. The very same person who was currently stowed away just underneath his feet.

There was no stopping JJ once he pushed past John B, unintentionally throwing him violently into the door frame as he made a sharp turn towards the stairs. There was a new found rage in his eyes so deadly, John B was certain he’d never see something quite like it ever again.

“JJ, JJ, stop!” John B called out quickly, frantically running after him. But he only drew attention to the situation more, because by the time he and the others managed to squeeze down the small stairwell, JJ was already stood over Rafe, who was long passed out, his head pressed against the wall and his face bruised beyond recognition.

“JJ!” Sarah shrieked, but John B held her back. He tried to ignore his wifes sobs of terror, too focused on keeping her away from the uncontrollable anger that their friend was currently releasing onto the deserved victim.

“You took everything from me!” JJ shouted through gritted teeth, not even phased by the blood that coated his knuckles and splattered across the bright white walls. “You piece of shit! You killed her!” He wailed, his punches slowing into soft taps as Rafes breathing slowed into soft wheezes for air through his definitely broken nose.

“A-and I blamed her for it the whole time. I-I fuckin’…I loved her.” JJ sobbed, ignoring the metallic smell of his hands as he used his palms to hide the vulnerability behind his tears that poured so wildly down his flushed face.

“I loved her, and I’ll never get to have her again.” JJ shouted through his hands, muffling his cries of pure grief, of unfathomable sadness that hit him all at once.

Pope was holding him within two strides, his arms wrapping around his friend as he too pieced together what happened, not needing as much context to understand the motive behind the violence.

In that moment, nothing more but the sounds of heavy sobs and thick, choked breathing echoed through the shaking boat, the storm long forgotten as the truth finally bubbled to the surface, leaving anything and anyone in its wake completely torn open.

Then, there was a moment of clarity for JJ, a singular hope that was based around the security of a magic that didn’t exist. He knew then, he had to get the treasure they were searching for. Selfishly, he didn’t even care about the money. He knew what he wanted, and he knew what his one wish would be once he got his hands on that crown.

And it would all be okay, if only he hadn’t had to have paid the price.

[willowed-wisp]

sweethearts [ johnny ‘soap’ mactavish ]

johnny ‘soap’ mactavish x f!reader

You had known him forever. Since nursery school and all the time in between.

John MacTavish- though, you called him Johnny. And in later life, that turned into calling him ‘Soap’.

He had been gunning for that uniform since you were 15 and he was 16… falsifying his age only to fail miserably.

It was culture shock to when he left when he was 18… he was your first friend, first kiss, first young love. Yet, it was nothing official. Just two best friends experimenting with each other. You couldn’t have asked for a better person.

You were there when he came back- more of a man than the boy who left. All of him larger than before even that indicative smile. But HE hadn’t changed, still the same snack eating, football loving Scotsman.

That meant your attraction for him was worse than ever- having been in love with Johnny for most of your life. His sky bursted gaze enough to drive you crazy.

Someone like him would never feel the same about you- strictly friends.

Mates who got mistaken for boyfriend and girlfriend most days of the week. Neither of you minded it but it was always you who persisted the, ‘as if… he drives me insane…’ the pining kind of insanity.

His return led you to distance yourself, an insecure freshly turned 18 year old, distracting herself from the boy next door. Johnny could do much better for friends than you, he was the youngest SAS recruit to pass the selection.

HE COULD DO MUCH BETTER THAN YOU.

You didn’t even go say goodbye to him when he left for his first mission- somewhere you’d never know.

Instead, he came to you. Stood at your doorstep.

His face gloomy, “So you weren’ even gonna say goodbye?” Not knowing what to do, your shoulders shrugged and silence ensued. “You’ve been off for weeks, when was the last time we had a movie night? Is it because of the training? Me leavin’?”

Fingers picking at your nails; you’d never been nervous around him. But this was the first time seeing him in god-knows how long, when you hadn’t spent a day away from each other. “I don’t know, John- ,”

“You do know and that’s the problem, Y/N, because you won’t bloody tell me what I’ve done wrong,” he spoke harsher than intended, regretting it within an instant as your stepped forward- sizing the six foot something soldier up.

Staring up at him, “Why do you bother with me when you could have anybody around you? I’m not going anywhere with my life!” It wasn’t envy that spurred you on, it was the fact he was going to leave you.

Heartbroken and yearning. Lost without the boy who had always bolstered you up when you had been thrown to the ground.

Johnny’s eyes welled with tears, “What’s made you think that?”

In a whisper, “You’ve just gotten into the fucking SAS, Johnny…”

“So what? I’m still the same guy… nothing’s ever gonna change me… you should know that by now…”

You wanted things to change- the dynamics between you. Before he found somebody who would knock him off his feet and you’d never get the chance.

His fingers trailed your arm, before he cupped your hand. Blue coveted your vision, “Nothing’s goin’ to change us, you’re my absolute best mate…”

Like a dagger, he struck a nerve, “Maybe I don’t want to be your ‘best mate’, I’m sick of pining for you when clearly you’ll never feel the same way,” a quick pause, “Go and find a pretty gir- ,” Before you knew it, his kiss smothered you. More intimate than when you were twelve, with more intent.

Instead of resisting, you caved in. Hands balanced holding his jawline, clean shaven.

Exploring every inch of your body in that hurried kiss. It was better than anything you had dreamed.

Before you pulled away first, “You’re my everything, Y/N…” Thumbs rubbing circles at your waist. “I cannot tell you how long I’ve wanted to do tha’…”

The memory ran writhe in your brain. That was 8 years ago…

Since then you were happily married with a baby on the way. Johnny had been deployed for over a month. Today he was supposed to be returning- from where you didn’t have a clue but he always came home safely.

That’s what mattered.

You expected the phone to start buzzing, the usual unknown number saying to go to the airport. Instead, a knock at the door.

It was like him not to want to run you around pregnant. But it was Simon who answered the door.

Not able to help the tremble. Air caught in your throat, choking on nothing. “He’s not… is he?” Stopping those tears from coming down- clutching your belly.

You’d have fallen to your knees- had it not been for capable hands.

You looked up, blue eyes for days and a face contorted worriedly, “What did you say, to ‘er, LT?” He held you close, but it would never be enough for you. “You and munchkin okay?” He rubbed your large stomach.

You crushed him in your arms. “Darlin’, I’m a bit tender…” Only then did you notice the sling in his arm, a bandage skirting beneath his shirt.

“What happened?” He shook his head, a grin on his face.

One of nervousness, “It could have been a lot worse,” Simon was as gruff as usual. You would never be allowed to know what happened.

“I’m just glad you’re safe and sound,” Thumb rubbing along longer stubble on his cheek, there was more to the story than either him or Simon were telling you. “You too, Si, thanks for taking care of him.” Spoken wholeheartedly, “Dinners on, you can stay if you want?”

He accepted as he usually did. The mood held less tension as time went on. You came to the conclusion that you were lucky to have Johnny in front of you, laughing at some stupid dad joke Simon said.

All you did was sit there, looking at the guy you had loved all your life.

Your Johnny…

————

I contemplated 💀 Johnny but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. He’s just too sweet and just too tragic to write.

Thank you for reading :) xx

————

masterlist

[loveesiren]

Help Me (Pt. 3)

Rafe Cameron x Maybank!reader

Synopsis: Rafe and Y/n finally seal the deal ;)

Warnings: Smut, language, stitches?

Word Count: 2.6k+

You'd been staying with the Camerons for three weeks now. When Ward and Rose came home from their trip you were extremely nervous. A beat up Pogue in their house was surely not something they'd want.

But you were wrong. They were nothing but welcoming to you. Sarah had explained to them what happened. Rafe followed you around like a lost puppy. Even Wheezie ended up loving you, coming to you to gossip about boys and school.

Rafe was clean and his parents could see it. Having you around really improved his behavior. You were respectful and kind and even stayed home with Wheezie when they had events to attend. Rose even offered you a job as her assistant when you were feeling better.

They'd even let John B and JJ come by. John B already worked for Ward. JJ was still skeptical of you and Rafe but he was still on his best behavior when he came over.

Rafe slept with you most nights, wanting to make sure he was there incase you needed anything. He was always so gentle and cautious not to hurt you while you healed. Your bruising had mostly subsided. You were finally starting to look like yourself again.

--

"You ready?" Rafe asked as you finished applying mascara to your lashes.

"Fuck yes." You said. "I can't wait to get these things out of me."

Today was the day you were having your stitches removed. You couldn't be more excited to heal and go back to your old self.

"We can stop and see JJ after," Rafe said as he took your hand and lead you downstairs.

"Are you excited?!" Wheezie asked as you walked into the kitchen.

"To stop looking like the bride of Frankenstein? Absolutely." You responded with a smile.

"Think you'll be ready to work?" Rose asks with a smile.

"Definitely! I'm sick of laying around doing nothing."

"Glad to hear it!"

"Okay, we gotta go or you're going to miss your appointment." Rafe scolded, knowing full well you will get sucked into a conversation with Wheezie and Rose.

You waved goodbye as Rafe dragged you out the door and helped you in to his truck.

"I can do it myself, you know," You say as he picks you up and places you into the passenger seat.

"Nope. Not going to risk you getting hurt again." He says before placing a kiss on your cheek and shutting the door.

You smile at the gesture. He was so protective over you. Normally this would annoy you but everything Rafe does makes you feel so happy and safe.

He climbed into the drivers seat and started the car.

"You ready to go, pretty girl?" He smiles over to you.

"I'll be pretty in an hour when these things are out of my face." You say, tracing over your stitches as you look in the mirror.

"You're pretty always. No matter what."

_____________

Rafe held your hand as the doctor slowly pulled each stitch out of your skin. You winced at the pain but it was no where near as bad as it was three weeks ago.

"You're doing good, baby." He said, playing with your hair behind your back.

"Really glad I was passed out when Ricky put them in," You chuckle.

Rafe tries to smile but the thought of that night still tugs at his heart. He'd barely left you alone since. If you weren't with him, he made sure you were with JJ. The few nights you'd spent at the Chateau with your brother and friends, he stayed up all night pacing. He'd text you and you would respond. He swallowed the urge to not over do it though. The last thing he'd want is to push you away.

"And done!" The doctor announces.

You stand up and go to the mirror. Your fingers trace over the scars left on your face and collar bone. You smile sadly. You were so happy the stitches were out but you knew you'd have these scares forever.

"Beautiful," Rafe says as he wraps his arms around you and kisses the top of your head. "Absolutely beautiful."

His words make you blush. The fact Rafe has seen you at your absolute worst and still worships the ground you walk on was all you needed.

"Come on," You say, dragging him out of the doctors office. "JJ is waiting."

Rafe's fingers are laced with yours the whole ride to the Chateau. He always got nervous being around the Pogues. Even though his own sister was one of them. It wasn't that he was scared of them. He just cared so much about you and he wanted your brother to accept him. Had he known JJ Maybank's sister would be the love of his life, he would have been a lot nicer to him before.

You pull up to John B's house. Rafe quickly jumps out and comes around to help you out.

The Pogues watch from the porch. JJ runs out to greet you.

"Hey, sis!" He says, wrapping you into a tight hug.

"Hey, J! How are you?"

"Good! Went fishing this morning. Grillin' em up now if you guys are hungry." JJ says. His eyes flicker to Rafe's.

Rafe stands behind you with his hands in his pockets. You turn to look at him. "You hungry, babe?"

His eyes shot up at you. You had never called him any pet name before. "Uhm, yeah, I could eat." He said.

JJ offered him a small smile. You skipped ahead to go say hi to everyone.

"How's she doing?" JJ asked as he trailed behind with Rafe.

"She's doing really well." Rafe answered. "Wheezie really loves her. So do my parents. Rose offered her a job."

JJ laughs. "Yeah, she seems happy. She's really happy with you."

"I try to make her happy," Rafe says as he watches you laugh with your friends. "I love her," He confesses.

JJ bites his lip and nods. Still not fully comfortable with the situation.

"Does she know?"

"No," Rafe shakes his head. "But I'll tell her."

"Look man," JJ starts. "We've had our issues. A lot of fucking issues. But my sister is all I have left. You make her happier than I've ever seen her. I don't want to ruin that for her. I'm willing to set shit aside in order to make her happy."

Rafe smiled, looking down at his feet before looking back at JJ. "I am too." He says, offering his hand to JJ.

JJ offers a small smile and shakes his hand. "Come eat, man!" He says as he hops over to the grill.

Rafe sits down on the couch and pulls you into his arms for a hug. You cling to him as he rocks you back and forth.

Sarah smiles at the two of you. She'd never seen her brother so happy and she was excited to finally see him clean and doing well.

______________________

After you ate you all made your way to the dock. John B and JJ were doing backflips off the boat. Pope, Sarah, and Kie all sat around drinking beer, laughing at the boys. You and Rafe sat on the dock, letting your feet trail in the water below.

The sunset was beautiful. Fading into a variety of warm colors. Rafe was glowing with the way the evening light kissed his tan skin.

You couldn't deny you'd been crushing on Rafe since the night you met him. The way he mumbled about how pretty you were when you helped his drunk ass off the beach. "Are you an angel?" He asked you multiple times as he clung to you.

Now you were living at his house, attached at the hip. Everything felt effortless with Rafe. You were just happy all the time. Watching movies with him and Wheezie, cooking dinner together, laying in bed talking. There was never a dull moment.

"Y/N?" Rafe's voice brought you back to the present moment.

"Yeah?" You ask, looking over at him. His messy hair blew slightly in the wind.

"Uhm...I just wanted to ask you..." He began, chewing on his nails.

"Ask me what, Rafey?"

"A-are we like...like...w-what are we?"

You smile at him and furrow your brows. "I don't know, Rafe. What are we?"

He chuckled awkwardly. "I mean, uhh...I'd like...I mean-"

You couldn't help but laugh as he tripped over his words.

"I'd like if you were my girlfriend," He finally admitted.

The rest of the Pogues were now listening in on your conversation.

You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him to you, pressing your lips to his. He kisses you back as he smiles at the gesture.

"Does that answer your question?" You whisper as you pull away slightly.

He just nods and smiles and kisses you again. You can hear Sarah and Kiara cheering from behind you.

"Really? Can you not mack on my sister right in front of me?" JJ scolds jokingly.

Rafe puts his hands up in surrender and pulls away from you. You just laugh and flip JJ off.

"You wanna go home and seal the deal?" You ask, biting your lip.

Rafe's eyes widen and he immediately jumps to his feet. "We're heading home!" He announces, helping you up.

"Oh, yuck!" Sarah scoffs, knowing exactly what caused his sudden excitement.

"You need a ride, Sarah?" Rafe asked, keeping his focus on you.

"Are you kidding? We share a wall, Rafe. I'm staying here tonight."

"Oh my God." JJ groans, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Love you, J!" You say as you pull Rafe towards the truck.

"Yup. Love you too!" JJ says as he shakes the thought of you and Rafe together from his mind. John B, Pope, and Kie just laugh at how uncomfortable Sarah and JJ are.

Rafe opens the passenger door for you and helps you in before running and jumping into the driver's seat. You giggle at his eagerness.

Rafe keeps his hand on your thigh the whole drive back to Tanneyhill. Slowly inching closer to your pussy as his fingers explore your skin.

You could already feel yourself dripping with need. When you pulled into Tanneyhill you didn't even wait for Rafe to open the door for you. You practically fell out of the truck and ran to meet him. Lips connecting with his instantly.

"I'm supposed to help you out," He pants against your neck, placing kisses on your skin.

"Help me up," You demand.

Rafe smiles and grabs your ass as you jump up and wrap your legs around his waist. He moans into the kiss as he stumbles to the house, sloppily opening the door and slamming you into the wall of the foyer.

"Rafe-"

You both freeze, lips still locked on his as you both open your eyes. Rafe slowly releases you to the floor.

"Hey dad," Rafe says as the two of you round the corner to see Ward, Rose, and Wheezie having dinner.

The two of you stood there, looking guilty with your messy hair and red cheeks. You awkwardly pulled the strap of your tank top back onto your shoulder.

Ward and Rose look at you knowingly and Wheezie just scoffs.

"Would the two of you like some dinner?" Rose asks.

"Uhm, we ate at John B's." You state. "JJ went fishing."

"Yeah, uhm..." Rafe begins. "And we both have to be up early for work tomorrow. Right dad? Rose?"

You nod in agreement. As the two of you slowly back away towards the stairs.

"So we're just gonna get to bed!"

Rose and Ward chuckle at your awkwardness.

"Ew," Wheezie spits. "Just go already!"

And with that, you and Rafe practically race upstairs to his bedroom.

"Subtle," Rose laughs as she sips her wine.

"I'm so over teenagers," Ward chuckles.

--

As soon as Rafe pulls you into his room he slams the door behind you and pushes you up against it, kissing you with force.

You tug at the buttons on his shirt, surely ripping a few as you shove the fabric from his shoulders.

He grabs the hem of your shirt and brings it up over your head before biting at your neck hungrily. "Is this okay?" He asked between nips.

"I'm healed, Rafe. Don't be gentle." You tell him.

He kisses his way down your body until he reaches your jeans. He's quick to undo the buttons and pull them to the floor along with your panties, leaving you completely exposed to him.

You bite your lip as his eyes flicker up to yours. "You're fucking dripping, baby girl." He smiles.

He brings one of your legs over his shoulder, your back still pressed to the wall as he slides his tongue over the length of your pussy.

"Oh, fuck!" You pant, tangling your fingers in his hair.

He slides his middle finger inside you as his tongue dances around your clit.

You could feel yourself coming undone at the sensation.

He slides a second finger into you and you almost collapse but he brings his hand up to your ass to keep you balanced.

"Rafe, oh my God-"

He pulls your other leg up over his shoulder. Rafe and the wall are the only things keeping you upright now.

"Cum for me, baby girl." He says between your legs.

You could hardly contain yourself as you reached your high. His hands wrapped around your thighs as you vibrated against him.

"Fuck, Rafe!" You screamed, not caring who heard. "Oh my fucking God!"

Rafe smiled as he licked you clean. He let your legs slide off his shoulders as you relaxed.

"That's my girl," He praises as he comes up to place a kiss on your lips.

You give him the devil's grin as you fall to your knees in front of him. "Let me make you feel good, baby." You tell him as you fiddle with his zipper. When you finally free his cock from it's restraints you bite your lip and meet his gaze. "Big boy," You say before running the tip of your tongue against his length.

"Fuuuuuck," He moans.

You smile before wrapping your lips around his cock and slowly sinking him into your throat.

"Jesus Christ, baby," He gasps as he watches you swallow every inch of him.

You could feel his knees weaken as you bobbed your head up and down on his cock. You pulled back, drool still connecting your lips to him as you looked him in the eyes. His face was priceless, absolutely stunned at your talent.

You smirked before spitting on his dick and getting back to work.

You felt his fingers tangle through your hair, pushing his cock deeper into your throat and you accepted him.

"I'm gonna fucking cum," He panted.

You let him take control, fucking himself into your throat as you gagged on his cock. He thrusted deep into your face as he released himself. You could feel the warm liquid trickle down your throat before he pulled out.

You looked up to him and smiled as you swallowed. Mascara was running down your cheeks and cum dripping from your chin.

"Pretty girl," He smiled down at you, still clutching your hair. "Get on the bed."

You did as you were told. Rafe climbed on top of you and pressed his hand against your cheek, brushing his thumb over your skin as he bit his lip. "Can I make love to you, sweetheart?"

You beamed at him, loving how sweet he was to you. "Mhmm, please." You nodded.

He lined himself up at your entrance and pushed into you slowly.

You moaned and wrapped your arms around his neck.

He pushed your knees up before snaking his arms behind your back. You clung to him as he thrusted into you slowly.

"Beautiful, perfect angel," He whispered into your ear. Your nails dug into his shoulder as he continued to press into you.

The feeling of his cock sliding against your walls was euphoric.

"Mine," He moaned. And with that you could feel yourself come undone.

"All yours," You told him as you reached your climax. He held you tight as you vibrated against him, bringing him to his own orgasm. You sucked on his neck as you felt him fill you.

"You're a God." He whispered, resting his head on your chest.

"Let me take you higher," You hissed as you rolled over and straddled him. "I'll show you God."

[tetragonia]

It Almost Worked

JJ Maybank x Fem!Reader

One summer night. Two knees touching each other. Three hours in conversation. Four logs burning bright on the bonfire. Five best friends having fun. Something almost worked.

warning: nothing, really. no use of (y/n), just pure fluff

note: this was in Season 1-ish, where the Pogues were just Kie and the boys. just a feel-good fic, knowing what we got in Season 4^_^

words: 1.2k

The night was warm, the stars were scattered across the Outer Banks sky like salt crystals tossed over midnight silk. You sat in a circle around the bonfire with John B, Kiara, Pope, and JJ, laughing and trading stories, all of you just on the edge of exhaustion from a long day out on the water. A gentle breeze swept through, carrying with it the salt and wildness of the ocean. It was mid-July and you wanted it to stay like that forever, just the five of you, having the most fun.

JJ sat next to you, his hair tousled and glowing faintly in the firelight, and his laughter mingled with yours as John B recounted a story. He leaned forward, face animated in the flickering light.

“So there we were, okay?” he began, grinning like he’d just cracked open a treasure chest. “Pope’s convinced that we’re being followed, right? He’s looking over his shoulder every two seconds, nearly tripping over his own feet!”

Pope rolled his eyes but stayed silent, clearly waiting for the punchline. Kiara smirked, already skeptical.

“So you guys are just… walking in circles?” she asked, eyebrow raised. John B laughed.

“Well, we thought we were being stealthy, but turns out, we circled around so many times, we ended up right back where we started!”

“Right back in front of Mrs. Callahan’s house,” Pope added, deadpan. “You know, the woman who called the cops on us last summer?”

Kiara shook her head, looking between John B and Pope with pure disbelief. “Wait, you mean to tell me you spent, what, an hour thinking you were outsmarting someone — just to wind up exactly where you started?”

“Hey, hey!” JJ jumped in, clapping to support John B. “They were clearly being hunted, Kie. Expert survival instincts, alright? It’s called evasion.”

You were clutching your stomach, laughing so hard your sides hurt as JJ kept trying to hype up the story with exaggerated nods and dramatic hand gestures.

“Oh, please,” you choked out, trying to catch your breath. “This is the same group that got lost on the mainland, and that was in broad daylight!”

John B threw up his hands in mock offense, “Okay, so maybe we didn’t exactly outsmart anyone. But come on! Admit it, we kept it interesting.”

Everyone erupted in laughter once again at the silly story. It was one of those moments where you felt like time had stopped; there was just the fire, the night, and the warmth of friends.

When everyone was busy laughing, you felt JJ shifted beside you, leaning back on his hands and stretching his legs out, his knee brushing against yours. The touch was so light, it could’ve been accidental, but he didn’t move it away. Neither did you.

Instead, you let the heat from his knee sink into yours, feeling a strange thrill at the proximity. It was something you’d been noticing more lately—the quiet moments where JJ was just close enough that you could feel him without touching him. And yet, tonight, there was something in the air. Maybe it was the firelight, or maybe it was the feeling of summer hanging heavy and endless, but you were painfully aware of him beside you.

“You guys remember that time we almost got stranded on Midsummers?” JJ’s voice was low, and he grinned, his eyes glancing toward you before drifting back to the group. “I thought for sure we’d end up spending the night in those marshes.”

“Thanks to your brilliant plan,” Pope said with a smirk, leaning forward. “What was it you said again? ‘Who needs a map when you have instinct?’”

Everyone laughed, JJ included, but you felt his knee press a little more firmly against yours, a slight nudge, like he was daring you to react. You met his eyes across the fire, and he raised his eyebrows, just barely, like he was challenging you. You knew that look—it was the one he used right before he did something reckless.

The fire crackled, and JJ leaned closer, his shoulder almost brushing yours now.

“Guess I can’t always get things right,” he murmured, his voice low enough that only you could hear.

“Almost doesn’t count,” you replied softly, giving him a playful nudge. But he just smiled, his gaze flicking from your eyes to your lips, lingering there for a heartbeat longer than it should. Your heart skipped, and you forced yourself to look away, but it didn’t stop the flush from creeping up your neck.

“Hey, you two! What are you whispering about over there?” Kiara’s voice cut through the moment, her eyes gleaming with mischief. She’d noticed the space between you and JJ, or rather, the lack of it.

“Nothing,” you said quickly, glancing away and picking at the edge of a log. But JJ, never one to let a moment pass, smirked and tilted his head toward her.

“Just talking about how close you were to breaking that table at Midsummers last year,” he teased, deflecting with his usual charm.

“Oh, shut up, Maybank,” Kiara shot back, but her smile betrayed her amusement.

The conversation drifted back into laughter and teasing, yet JJ didn’t move. His knee was still pressed against yours, his arm brushing yours every so often as he laughed, his hand nearly grazing your own.

Finally, John B and Pope started talking about some ridiculous theory about the treasure, but you were barely listening. You felt hyper-aware of every breath JJ took, every subtle movement he made beside you. You turned your head, meaning to tell him something about the stars, or the fire, or anything to ease the tension building between you.

But then you caught the look in his eyes — something deeper, softer, something that made your heart beat a little faster.

“You know,” he said, his voice just a murmur, “this was a good night.”

You felt yourself smiling despite the heat, despite the way his gaze was making it hard to breathe. “Yeah, it was,” you replied, just as softly.

For a split second, it felt like everything else disappeared — the fire, the laughter of your friends, even the stars. There was just JJ, his blue eyes meeting yours, a small, hesitant smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He leaned just slightly closer, his shoulder brushing yours.

The air between you crackled, charged with all the words neither of you had spoken, all the things you hadn’t allowed yourself to admit. He tilted his head, his lips a mere breath away from yours, close enough that you could feel his breath warm against your cheek. And for a moment, you thought he was going to kiss you. For a moment, you thought everything was about to change.

But then, he pulled back just slightly, the playful smirk returning to his face, though his eyes were softer, his voice almost a whisper.

“Almost,” he said, and you swore you heard a hint of regret in his tone.

Your heart dropped and soared all at once, caught in the tension of what could have been. You gave him a small, bittersweet smile, and replied, “Almost.”

He chuckled, looking away with that familiar ease, but you knew that he felt it too. The unspoken tension hung heavy between you, an acknowledgment of the connection you both felt but couldn’t quite act on.

As the firelight flickered, casting shadows across the beach, the two of you sat in silence, close but not quite close enough. And though neither of you said a word about it, you knew—tonight was the night that it almost worked.

[on-a-lucky-tide]

Like You Mean It: A Nikprice Mafia AU

John is invalided out of the military and is struggling to adjust to civilian life, stuck in a cycle of poor coping mechanisms and denial. He gets sent to Chester by his younger sister to service a client that has scared all her other employees. Little does he know that the appointment will change the trajectory of his life forever.

cw: post-traumatic stress disorder, extremely poor attitude to his own disability, toxic coping mechanisms.

“How is the new hobby going? Painting, isn't it?”

Price frowned at the table in front of him, counting the rings of coffee stains. Four. “It didn't work out.”

“Oh, that's a shame. What happened?”

Price swallowed, his fingers twitching on his knees. He could tell the truth: that the inane, witless conversations had bored him to death, or that one of the women had started flirting with him and it had made him uncomfortable, or that the paintbrush had felt unwieldy and small in his hands, that it looked wrong there, or that he had lost his temper, overwhelmed by something he couldn't put his finger on, and thrown the canvas to the floor before limping out, or…

“It jus’ didn't hold my interest. ‘M sure I'll find somethin’.”

The therapist tapped her notepad with the end of the biro and studied him closely. She was one of the best, Mac had said. Worked with all the old boys that invalided out after a lifetime in the service. She helped them get back on their feet, navigate civilian life, and finally put to bed some of the ghosts they dragged behind them. Price had to give her a chance to help, which meant opening up some of those wounds he’d let heal badly over the years. Sally was nice enough, and he was trying not to let his own internal battles influence how he regarded her. Sometimes, she made that hard.

“How are the nightmares? Any better?”

“Yeah, they… uh, they don' happen as regularly.”

“When was the last one?”

Last night. “Coupla weeks ago, I reckon.”

She wrote that down. Price tapped his knees again and glanced at the watch on the table. She made him take his off because he had spent the first two sessions glancing at it. The compromise had been that she would set an alarm on hers. It was a brand new smartwatch, she said, it tracked her calories, her heart rate, had GPS. The kind of thing his watches had been doing for years, except his watches could call in an air strike and track enemy combatants across the field of battle.

The old one, that is. His new one just told the time.

Her husband had bought it for her, so Price had said it looked very posh.

“Have you given any more thought to the dating app we talked about?”

The watch beeped. Thank fuck.

“Whelp.” He clapped his hands together before rolling to his feet with a quiet groan, a combination of actions that he knew made him appear ten years older than he actually was. “I'll see ya next week then, Sally.”

She handed him back his watch and he slipped it over his wrist, before she placed the notes down on the table. Given that his eyesight was still sharp, he caught the words, ‘denial’, ‘withdrawn’ and ‘isolated’ amongst the scrawl. His jaw twitched and he averted his gaze. This was one assessment he didn't seem to be passing in flying colours. She gave no indication she had realised he'd seen. “Companionship, John. Even a friend that has nothing to do with the service. It will do wonders.”

“Right. I’ll… work on that.”

It was raining when he stepped outside, grey clouds stretching across the skyline in a dark, homogenous blanket. He almost skidded on a drain, his uneven gait prone proving more of a liability in the wet, as he walked across the car park, and he swallowed the resulting grimace even though there was no one around to see. He did it more out of habit than anything else; show no weakness.

When he slumped into the seat of his old Honda Civic, he sat in the mute silence for a moment, watching the raindrops tumble down the windscreen. His leg throbbed, the tight scar tissue pulling, tendons creaking under tension, and he looked down at his knee with a scowl.

It had been a building falling on him that had done him in the end, trapping his leg for seven hours while his task force dug him out. Ghost had dragged him out by his bitch strap, and then carried him to casevac, with Soap doing his best not to look at the mangled state of his captain's leg as he covered the rear. A miracle that he hadn't lost it, they said. That he hadn't been crushed completely.

A miracle.

So, now, he got to rot away slowly in a small, one-bedroom flat in Liverpool, with TV dinners and Coronation Street. He walked through the world numbly, like he was observing it from afar, through frosted glass. The only brief glimpses of feeling he got was when one of the 141 messaged him. Sometimes a picture, other times a text. They were few and far between. It wasn't that they didn't care. They were busy. He knew the demands more than anyone. The world didn't stop turning because Bravo Six had left the game.

That didn't stop him checking his phone every few hours, just in case he had missed a notification. Checking his watch so he could tell himself where in their routine they would be.

He did it now.

1400, Tuesday.

If they weren’t on mission, Simon would have the experienced operators running drills with the trainees. It was autumn, which meant the start of bad weather and low visibility environs. It was likely he would do a jump in a few weeks with full kit to test the development of their survival skills.

He glanced at his phone. Nothing.

With a deep sigh through his nose, Price jammed his keys into the ignition and turned. The old car choked into life, the engine ragged in the cold, and he clicked it into ‘Drive’. He was grateful for the bloody thing, really. Those first few months of riding around on the bus had nearly been enough to send him to an asylum, with screaming kids and the constant smell of piss from seemingly every person that sat down. When his GP had approved him to drive an automatic, he'd almost dropped to his knees to fellate the bastard in gratitude.

He didn't really track his drive home. Stopping at reds, giving way, flicking down the indicator as he turned corners. The streets, houses and people of Liverpool passed by in a colourless smudge until he was pulling into his car parking space and staggering out in the rain. It happened a lot; the disappearing into his own head. Like his brain was giving up without stimulus and switching into standby mode.

The lift was still out of order despite his numerous phone calls on behalf of the residents, so he turned into the stairwell and began the arduous climb to the third floor. Gone were the days when a phone call from John Price moved literal armies. Now he couldn't even get fuckin’ Bill from maintenance out with a screwdriver to fix the fuckin’ lift so Jenny, eighty years old and wheelchair bound, could leave to do her groceries.

By the time Price reached the top of the first flight, his leg was burning; by the second, he was breathless from pain, and by the third, his eyes were welling with tears. The pain from his leg seemed to burn through his entire body, clutching his chest in a vice, bile and nausea building in the back of his throat, and he was having to stifle the sounds punching from his chest by biting on his knuckles.

His hands shook as he extracted his front door key, and continued to do so as he tipped more than a single dose of his strongest painkillers into his palm, the kettle hissing behind him on the countertop as he slid to the floor. He didn't wait for the tea to brew, but necked the pills dry, crunching them down in between huffing deep breaths through his nose.

There had been a time after his injury that he had believed he would recover and return to the field. A small part of him still did sometimes, but all it took was a set of stairs to truly humble him, leaving him whimpering and shaking on his kitchen floor. Pathetic, weak. How far he had fallen. He turned his face into his palms and pressed the heels hard into his eyes.

When he looked up again, the room was dark.

Price latched a hand on the edge of the countertop and pulled. His bad leg was stiff, seized with cold and aching, and his right one was numb from where he'd been sitting on it. His stumbling efforts would have made for a great Benny Hill sketch, he thought bitterly.

Once he had set the kettle reboiling and a frozen TV dinner in the microwave, Price checked his phone. One message. From his sister.

Carol (16:00): How did the appointment go?

Price glanced at the clock. 1900. Bollocks.

Price (19:00): Good.

Carol (19:01): Three hours to write that. Nice one, John.

He sighed, smacking the top of the phone into his forehead in frustration, before typing out a response.

Price (19:04): We talked about the painting thing, some old missions, and she asked me about the dating app.

Carol (19:05): did you make the profile yet?

Price (19:06): what the fuck do you think?

Carol (19:07): stop being a miserable cunt and do it

Price (19:07): No one wants to date a cripple.

He didn't send that one. It read far too much like self pity and that just turned his fucking stomach.

Price (19:07): If I wanted someone nagging me 24-7 I'd move in with you.

Carol (19:08): Prick.

Price (19:08): Yeah, tthat'd be a fine thing.

Carol (19:09): omg 😭

Carol (19:11): Gary says you never text back about games night. Kimmy wants to see you.

Gary was Carol’s “gay bff”—her words. He’d been a godsend when her bottom feeder of a husband had finally pushed the old bill too far and got himself nicked for possession with intent to sell and GBH. Price owed the bloke a lot, because he’d picked up the slack where a big brother should have been. He was pretty sure Carol had tried to set them up once, which would have gone about as well as trying to get a Labrador to date a Persian cat. Gary would have shredded Price with his kitten claws in minutes.

Price (19:12): Depends on my shifts, boss.

Carol (19:13): Ok.

Carol (19:13): Don't give up on us.

Carol had saved him enough already. She had been the one to force him to retrain at college so he could work at her salon. Physical therapy and massage. Something to do with his hands that wasn’t killing people, she’d said. Besides, she wanted to attract more male clientele and his machismo would make them feel less emasculated about seeking support. He felt like there had been a hidden barb there, but hadn’t pressed. Price swallowed the lump in his throat and stared into his dark kitchen for a moment before he replied.

Price (19:14): trying

Carol (19:15): I know

Carol (19:15): love you big bro

Price (19:16): love you too, love to Kimmy.

He shoved his phone into his pocket as he poured his tea, taking it black despite the presence of milk in the fridge. That was at the other end of the kitchen and the pain killers hadn’t yet kicked in properly. His microwave meal seemed more or less cooked through, the steam searing his fingertips as he tugged off the plastic lid, so grabbed a fork and headed into the dark sanctity of his living room.

His flat had always been sparse, with basic furniture, a handful of books and family photographs. None of the ‘homely’ touches you’d expect of a home. In all fairness, he had never spent a lot of time here—only a few days leave if he’d been at a loose end. But even then he had preferred sleeping in Carol’s spare room, doing the school run in the mornings so she could have a less hectic start to the day, and making sure the house was clean, that there was something edible on the table in the evenings. Fat chance of that now. She didn’t need another deadbeat arsehole on her couch twenty-four hours a day. She’d done her time with that bullshit. So Price had only visited a handful of times since being discharged; once to take a look at a leak under the kitchen sink, and then to check the weird noise her car had been making when the temperature dropped.

Price slumped into the permanent dip of the right hand sofa cushion and took a moment to bask in the relief, tea and dinner hovering over his lap. Some days, he wanted to stay on the damn sofa and rot into it, but the stubborn streak that had managed to survive the last few months wouldn’t let him. He had to be doing something—anything—even if that was hobbling about the supermarket for Jenny while the lift was out of action. A last, defiant stand against the listless void left behind when they had taken the service from him.

He dug the clicker from where it had fallen down the side of the cushion and turned over just in time for the opening credits of Coronation Street, blowing over the heap of white rice and tasteless curry in front of his mouth. His mind faded out into white noise as he ate mechanically and knocked back his tea to wash the taste away. The episode hadn’t even finished before he was pulling the fleece blanket from the other cushion over his lap, eyes drooping closed. He checked his phone once more before he placed it on the lamp table for the final time.

The storm outside picked up a notch and Price felt it tremour through the old building, and he watched the rain lash against the balcony windows as fitful sleep dragged him under.

—

“This is Bravo Six in the blind; Watcher—ahh, Watcher, do you c-copy?”

Static.

”Kate… Kate, please… fuh-ck, Watcher, this S-six in—“

The rubble above his head moved. He held his breath. There was nowhere for him to move. Nowhere for him to run. It had taken an eternity to wrestle his arm free enough to get to his radio. If the rubble shifted now, it would crush him.

The pain was blinding. Like white hot pokers stabbing through every muscle. If he hadn’t been able to move his arm, he would have assumed his spine or neck were broken. Maybe both. He could feel his right leg, but not his left. Couldn’t even see it.

”Watcher, do you copy?”

Static.

”Kate, please… don’t let me die down here, don’t… please…”

His pleas were soaked up by the oppressive silence. The muffled, muted space that seemed to swallow his voice.

Suffocating nothingness.

Static.

He couldn’t move. Not an inch. His trap was closing in. Crushing him. Several tons of concrete and steel pressing down on his ribs, his legs. He couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t breathe.

Couldn’t breathe.

—

Waking up felt like he was having to claw himself out from beneath that rubble himself, chest heaving, the neck of his t-shirt stained dark as he fought his way back to the surface. Early morning light was leaking through the balcony door, the spots of rain still clinging to the glass making the living room glitter like a disco ball hung from the ceiling. He lifted a shaking hand from beneath the fleece and smoothed his damp hair back over his head, mentally counting through the grounding exercises Sally had taught him.

Feel, see, hear, touch.

Like he’d been run over by a Challenger—his ceiling—phone alarm—blanket.

Price threw out a hand and managed to swipe his damn phone off the table. Cussing and snarling, he slumped onto the floor, fishing it out from beneath the lamp stand. He didn’t have enough energy to climb his way back onto the sofa, so he sat there once he’d switched the alarm off, staring into space. The world slowly filtered back in, his senses spreading out through the room, latching onto anything that connected him to the reality outside his head. Unfortunately, that also brought with it the constant dull throb of pain in his left side.

That last mission had been the final crack in a dam he hadn’t even been aware of. Over twenty years of difficult operations in the most inhospitable environs and his mind had soldiered through, unbroken, robust. Colleagues and friends had fallen before him, so he knew what post-traumatic stress disorder looked like, but it was something that happened to other people. Not him. Not in a million fuckin’ years.

But leave him trapped under some rubble for a few hours and suddenly every difficult experience, every interrogation, every period spent trapped behind enemy lines at their mercy, every close call, every fallen soldier, they all came flooding back like vengeful demons that had been caged in the pits of hell to tear off their pound of flesh.

The nightmares weren’t always the same. Sometimes, his subconscious decided to dredge up an experience from over a decade ago to torture him with. A few nights ago, it had been the interrogation that had left him with burn scars over his lower back. A month spent in an Al Qatala detention facility before Mac had extracted him. He hadn’t broken—had given them bloody nothing—and had passed the psych eval after that one with flying colours. Even the psychologist had been a little suspicious—impressed, but suspicious. Turned out all he’d done was squash it all so far down that it was invisible to a prying eye, and then managed to trick himself that he was just made of stronger stuff than average.

He was good at that though: keeping secrets. Pretending, manipulation, getting what he wanted out of people. Out of himself. It was no surprise that he’d got so good at it over the years that he had managed to dupe even himself into believing what he needed to get the job done. Stupid wanker.

Price scowled as he rolled to his feet, wobbling unsteadily at first as he regained his balance, before limping into his bedroom. He had a quick shower to wash the sweat off and threw on his gym kit. Just because his lower half was useless, that didn’t mean he couldn’t keep the rest of him in shape. The physio had told him to keep it light, that everything in his body was connected and his nervous system needed time to adjust, and he had nodded along.

Truth was, he liked the burn of it. It felt like punishment. A punishment that he could control. It was both proof that he was still, physically, worth something and a way to chastise the parts of himself that weren’t as strong as they used to be. John left the house just as his morning alarm went off.

He ignored the sideways glances from the reception staff as he limped through the automatic barriers, his car parked in the second row back because he couldn’t quite bring himself to use the damn blue badge the council had given him when Carol had completed the forms on his behalf.

This early in the morning, the gym was more or less empty. There were a few night shifters getting their end of day workout in at the squat racks, so Price dumped his gym bag by a bench in front of the dumbbells. The powerlifter to the right glanced at him as he grabbed 26kg for a warm up set, and from that point on he let his mind go blank. All that existed as he worked his way through his ‘push day’ was the burn in his shoulders, his chest, down his spine. If he closed his eyes, he could pretend he was in the gym in Credenhill, with Ghost grunting on his right and Soap pausing to take yet another selfie on his left…

His phone trilled.

He dropped the dumbbells to the floor at his feet and snatched it from his bag. He hated himself for feeling disappointment when he saw his sister’s name.

“Wotcha, love, everyfin’ ok?” He slumped back on the bench, spare arm dangling between his legs as the burn of the lift faded.

I know it’s ya day off, but I need a favour…

”Right…”

We’ve got a regular in Chester who needs a home visit.

”Oh yeah, cheshire set, is he?”

Nah, he’s… a foreign national. Scary bloke, actually. And that’s the problem, all the girls are refusin’ t’ go.

”Did he touch one’uv‘em?”

No, no. Nothin’ like that. He’s just… scary. Lives in one of those big detached houses, and he has loads of… well, they called ‘em henchmen. Said it’s like walkin’ int’ mafia film, John.

”If he’s so bloody terrifyin’, why not jog ‘im on?”

It’s… not tha’ simple, la.

Price’s hackles went up instantly. Not that simple could mean a hundred different things, but all the dots were joining up in a way that made Price want to load his M1911 before he drove over. “Why?”

Look, I… if ya can’t do, ‘ll go meself, but…

”Don’t you bloody dare,” Price growled. “I’ll go. Send me the time, the address, what his usual is.”

He heard her breathe a sigh of relief down the phone.

Cheers, John. I… I owe y’bevvy, yeah?

“Stop tryin’ to set me up with Gary, and we’ll call it even.”

Oi, I was jus’—okay, fine. Gary is off the Price menu.

”Carol, I swear t’…” He glanced over his shoulder as the grunting behind him had gone conspicuously silent and the brief moment of eye contact was enough to make him drop his voice. “Right. Forward me the intel, and—“

She chuckled.

”Wot?”

I will forward ya the intel, big brother. Love ya, see ya later.

Price stared at the phone in his hand long after it had gone black. The heat under his skin was adrenalin. He’d recognise the bubbling rush of it anywhere; the heavy drum of his heart, the tightness in his chest. Excitement.

“Fuckin’ ‘ell, get a grip,” Price mumbled as he chucked his phone into his bag and returned the weights. It was probably some sweaty billionaire who fancied himself the bloody Godfather. Normal people—people who hadn’t spent their entire adult lives fighting real mobsters, crooks and war criminals—saw a grim face and a sharp suit and were easily intimidated. Price would scope the place out and gather some more information on whatever the fuck this arsehole had on Carol, and then he would fix the problem. He was good at that. Fixing other people’s problems. It let him ignore his own for a bit longer.

[distinguisheddwarffriend]

Here's the thing (don't kill me for this):

Thorin dying at the End of The Hobbit makes sense, in a tragic kind of way. He always gave his everything for his people, it is somewhat poetic that his last act of service to his people was the ultimate sacrifice. That he could find peace with.

He'd find the afterlife an actual restful place, and could take the time to face his demons & trauma. Because he would know he did all he could & gave all the had.

HOWEVER!!!!

Fili & Kili dying was pure BULLSHIT!!!!!

I don't know what possessed Tolkien (our love & saviour, no disrespect) to kill them. Extra tragedy? Pffffff

Un.nece.ssary!

Apart from how Fili would have made an AMAZING king, them dying, his CHILDREN (look me in the eyes and tell me he didn't love those two like his own sons I dare you) ruined ALL peace he would have ever had, turning the WHOLE THING into a needless tragedy, the line ending, their home regained but not for his boys.

THAT is the real crime, that those boys, who left to fight for a home they never even knew, out of loyalty and love for their uncle & surrogate father, lost their lives before actually living them.

THAT is what I will never forgive, forever deny, and why I continue reading fix-it fics like a starving person.

JOHN RONALD REUEL I have WORDS for you!!!!!!

[mctartney]

Okay I feel like so much of it was a blur but let me try and write what I remember and share some of my highlights!

- Before the show we heard screaming and everyone rushing the other side of the arena and were like who the FUCK has turned up??? Well now we know lol

- He is such a genius starting the show with AHDN because that first chord??? Instant Beatlemania 

- Let Me Roll It ok ok ok listen. Not usually an old Paul fucker. Him taking his jacket off before and everyone cheering was funny. BUT then him slowly rolling up his sleeves and undoing his top button during the verses?? oooOOH let me at him 🥴

- He didn't tell the "Jimi asked me to tune his guitar" story like usual, was just like "he was a lovely guy, very humble" 🥺

- I don't know why but I found My Valentine so emotional?? I don't know, it's just Paul has lost so many people but I'm so glad that throughout his life he has always found people to love and who love him

- I've Just Seen A Face in front of the Cavern backdrop made me UNWELL

- Paul get everyone to do the little "oh-oh-oh-oh"s in In Spite Of All The Danger and then the crowd kept doing it when the the song was over and he looked so happy and it made him laugh so he did the last verse again AW

- Blackbird -  I've heard him tell the story about seeing the kids going to school in Little Rock before, but he told a story about how he got a text from a lady in Jacksonville who saw The Beatles there when they refused to play a segregated show and she said it was the first time she had ever stood next to a white person. Glad he makes a point to tell these stories because it makes it very clear - this was not long ago in the slightest.

- Here Today, okay I've never seen him have an emotional wobble in person, he's got through it okay. Every time I've seen him have a wobble in a video it's been on the "I love you" line. But this time he kind of had a moment on the "I really loved you and was glad you came along" and oh man. It's just so sad, isn't it? It's so sad.

- Now and Then, he had a little moment to admire the heart cards the crowd held up and it was very cute!!

- He started telling the story of the lost bass and then brought it out to play it and it was SO surreal to be in the same room in that guitar. He was like "I'm going to play it for the first time in 50 years" and then twanged the strings and was like "Well, it sounds like a bass!" djskf

- Get Back with the lost bass and Ronnie Wood was just so fun and they all looked like they were having so much fun!

- Let It Be was really beautiful, everyone lit up the arena with their phone torches. It was so special. Afterwards, he looked out to the audience and says, completely serious, like your dad giving his best advice "Let it be. There will be an answer. Let it be." I love him so much.

- Live And Let Die, one of the loud fireworks accidentally went off in the middle of a verse and scared the LIFE out of me. I jumped a mile and then looked back over to Paul who was just laughing djkdg. Him covering his ears for the last explosion at the end is so cuuute too he's the funny uncle at the party it's true.

- I've Got A Feeling. Ohhh. Sweet boy. Seeing him sing with John. Hearing John's voice ring through the arena so clearly. It's a lot.

- Paul: "We've got another special guest for you" Me: 🧐🙏 The Crew: *start dragging a drumkit on* Me: 😨 Paul: "Ringo Starr!" Me: 🥴😵

- IT WAS UNREAL!! THEYRE SO CUTE. Ringo truly is so little aww and they had a cuddle and Paul kissed him on the forehead. Honestly the affection between them was palpable, I dunno how to describe it. Just really fond.

- Lowkey Sgt Peppers and Helter Skelter were a blur bc my brain was just going PAUL AND RINGO SAME ROOM 50% BEATLES

- Then Abbey Road Medley went way too quickly and was all over so soon sighh

- He kissed the camera on the way out 😘😘 Love him to bits forever & always

[ghostkinnie]

COD BOYS WHEN YOU DIE IN THEIR ARMS

pairing: ghost, soap, price, könig, alejandro and graves.

warnings: angst, mentions of death and blood, gender neutral y/n.

SIMON "GHOST" RILEY

- Simon was an empty shell for a long time until you came along and showed him what it was like to live again. You turned his life upside down and taught him what love was.

- But there you were now. Bleeding in his arms for a bullet coming from a sniper that he didn't find and didn't kill. He had failed.

- The only thing keeping Ghost sane and human was now dying in his arms and becoming cold as ice.

- And there was nothing he could do to save you. Once again he would lose everyone he loves because he was unable to protect. He had believed in happiness but it was taken from him again.

- " Please... Please Y/N don't leave me. Open your eyes. Please...Don't leave me alone...."

- But there was nothing else to do. You were dead and Simon went back to being a broken, empty shell. A ghost that would wander in solitude.

●●●

JOHNNY "SOAP" MACTAVISH

- You are Johnny's sunshine even though he is a contagious explosion. You were everything that made this man smile.

- You "were" as you now hung lifeless in his arms. He had arrived too late.

- And for not arriving sooner now he had the love of his life dead in a pool of blood. He would never forget. He would never forgive himself.

- He would brush your hair out of your face and stroke your cheek one last time as desperate sobs wriggled out of him.

- "Love? Please love answer me...! Y/N breathe.!"

- He would scream and just leave your side when Ghost or Price dragged him.

●●●

CAPTAIN JOHN "PRICE"

- Losing a soldier has always been difficult for Price. He is the captain and responsible for the lives of his men.

- But in the end he always had to move on.. but not this time. Not when the shot hit the only person he lived and died for; you.

- "Baby?! Call the fucking doctors now!...Little one I'm here now I've got you."

- But it didn't matter how quickly the doctors arrived or how much he called your name. There was a lot of blood and you were already choking on it.

- Price would beg you to resist but he knew. He knew you were gone and taken a part of him with you; his happiness.

●●●

ALEJANDRO VARGAS

- Alejandro is a romantic man and in the moment the two of you got into a relationship he knew you would take over his mind. There was only you for him.

- He would die for you and he always told you that. But what he didn't know is you who would do it throwing yourself in front of him to receive a stab.

- The knife would still be stuck in your belly when he grabbed you and looked at you in complete despair. He had never been so afraid.

- He would scream for doctors, carry you, kiss your bloodied hands and be by your side every final second.

- But being by your side wasn't enough to save you. And the scene of your last breaths would haunt him forever.

- ¿Mi amor? Por favor...Talk to me.."

●●●

KÖNIG

- You were the most precious thing in König's life. Everything that kept him stable and close to complete happiness. You were his life.

- And he was a boy so lost in love that he believed you two would be happily ever after. He really wanted this.

- But all of König's dreams of you were shattered when a gunshot rang out and a bloodstain formed on your chest.

- That was it. Nothing could be done. You were dying and König could just scream and hug your body so tightly it could break bones. He was so scared.

- Liebe? Mein Leben?...Bitte.. Wake up wake up wake up.. WAKE UP!"

- Panic fills his body and he knows that after that day he would be a broken man.

●●●

PHILLIP GRAVES

- Graves met you during missions of the 141. You were a bomb of energy and transformed his life into pure joy. He was lost in you.

- It happened during the betrayal. He intended to take you with him and keep you by his side no matter what.

- But one of his shadows ended up shooting you. And the only thing Graves could see was your body collapsing lifelessly to the floor. What was the point of living if the love of his life was dead?

- A scream of pure pain escaped his lips and he rushed to drag his body to safety. But it was no use. You were no longer breathing.

- I'm sorry! I'm sorry it's my fault! It's all my fault please...Please don't die!"

- But you were already dead and it was his fault.

[in1-nutshell]

Hi, it's me again, could you write another story about Buddy Wonder Woman's daughter, about her friendship with John and Dhmian, about her misadventures and about her adaptation to the new modern world

Here are some shenanigans the trio have gotten themselves into!

Hope you enjoy!

Wonder Buddy and the Super Sons shenanigans

SFW, Platonic, Slight Familial, Amazonian reader

WONDER FAMILY

Damian, Jon, and Wonder Buddy were often referred to as the New Trinity by the older Leaguers.

Almost spitting images of their parents in looks and personality.

But they had a different bond than their parents had with each other.

They had a deep-rooted friendship that none of their parents would ever have with each other.

It showed in some of their child like shenanigans.

Exhibit A. The Roomba Incident.

Buddy was very cautious of all the new technology around her, having never seen anything like it on the island.

She had a particular grudge against Roombas after one went rouge (Luthor tech) in the Kent household and she had to fight it.

Lois came back home to a very clean home, a dirty Jon, a new Wayne tech Roomba, and Buddy making apology deserts.

It took forever to get Buddy to stop raising her sword at another Roomba’s.

Damian: “For the last time Buddy this is not going to kill you!” Buddy: “You said that last time and look what happened!” Jon: “Wait!” He flies to the fridge and pulls out a popsicle. Buddy looks at it curiously. Jon: “I’ll give you the popsicle if you put the sword down.” Buddy looks hesitantly before sheathing the sword. Jon chuckles as Buddy has a big smile on her face while eating it. Meanwhile in the Watchtower… Diana: “…Something just happened…” Bruce: “What?” Clark: “Diana?” Diana: “I do not know yet… but something is waiting for me on Earth.”

Which leads to Exhibit B: Sweets.

It surprised both boys how much of a sweet tooth Buddy had.

It was also one of the easiest ways to sway her to their side of an argument.

While she was fair mediator, giving her some of her sweets, she might rethink her previous thoughts.

But they use this power sparingly.

After the Christmas Light Incident, they know better than to let Buddy have too much sugar.

Her inner Amazonian takes the wheel and has enough energy to fight a speedster.

At the Wayne Manor. Daiman: “I told you to watch her! You know she’s still new and gets lost!” Jon: “In my defense, she was right behind me when I last saw her. She couldn’t have gone that far anyways.” A few minutes later… Buddy after 3 plates of cookies and 5 bottles of soda, has her sword out and is swinging maniacally at the test dummies. Buddy: “DEATH BEFORE DISHONOR!” Jon, Damian, Jason, Time, and Steph are behind a table acting as a barrack. Damian: “Which one of you imbeciles thought it was a good idea to give her sugar!” Steph: “To be fair, I’ve always wanted to see what a sugar high Amazon looked like.” Jon peaks over the table. Jon: “She’s still going strong. Dummy number 98 is gone.”

It took a couple hours for her sugar crash to start happening.

All high sugar items in the manor are now heavily guarded.

Even with Buddy’s little hiccups, she is still an extremely loyal friend.

She has gone out of her way to make sure her friends are safe and happy.

Whether it be during missions or as civilians.

The boys wouldn’t give anything up for their friend.

They would stand by her side without hesitation.

Because they knew she would do the same for them.

Jon is trying to talk a bully down. The bully snickers and goes to punch Jon before he notices a girl and boy behind the Kent. Both are glaring at him. If looks could kill, he’d be at the center of the earth by now. The bully leaves. Jon smiles: “I did it guys!” Damian: “Of course.” Buddy: “Didn’t have a single doubt!” Later on patrol… Buddy is carrying Damian in the air. Damian: “I had it handled!” Buddy rolls her eyes. Buddy: “Yes, because nothing says I have it handled than hanging by one’s fingertips with a broken leg.” Damian: “My leg is not broken.” Buddy raises an eyebrow. Buddy: “You want to test that theory?” Damian grumbles in response. Another while later… Some random guy is trying to hit on Buddy at school. Random guy: “How about I show you a good time?” Wonder, oblivious, Buddy: “Oh? What are you planning?” The guy gets closer and slides his arm around her shoulders. Buddy starts to glare at him. His face starts getting closer. THWACK! The guy is now unconscious on the ground. Buddy blinks at the sudden drop. Damian: “Tt.” Jon grabs her hand gently. Jon: “You okay?” Buddy: “I’m fine.” Damian: “How could you let him get so close?” You can easily flick him across the street.” Buddy: “I thought he wanted to be friends.” Damian just groans before grabbing her other hand and starts walking. Damian: “I hate both of you.” Buddy and Jon just laugh as they let their human friend drag them back to the Wayne manor.

[tommygrace]

Of the three brothers, Tommy and Arthur are the most affected by the war, than John, that we can see, because SK focused more on the two of them and not so much on John.

But we can also see the violence in him, how he enjoys cutting people's eyes, and he loves to fight. He has no problem cheating on Esme with other women, he doesn't feel guilty, and he started, along with Lizzie, the war with the Changrettas, precisely because of his ex. After the tragedy, he did not feel guilty, and instead of accompanying Tommy, what he did was provoke him.

Likewise, sometimes he had good intentions, and although the relationship with Esme could be a little toxic, I really liked them both.

Arthur is the most affected, of the three, by the violence that he carries inside, from killing the poor boy, and every time they fought, a wild animal that he carries inside would come out. One of the stories that I liked the most in the show was the one between Arthur and the boy's mother. It was shocking and we were able to see up close how the Shelbys affect people, forever, because that mother will never be able to get over losing her son and in that way.

Also the relationship with Linda, at the beginning, we see a woman with good intentions, a Catholic woman, who is sure that she will be able to heal Arthur, and get the violence out of him, by the end of the relationship, we see that it was Arthur the one who changed Linda, bringing her darkness to the surface. From a loving relationship, to a toxic relationship with physical and verbal violence. In the end Linda had no other solution than to point a gun at her husband, wishing for his death.

And then there's Tommy, the war continued on his mind, so much so that he could hear the shovels on the wall. He used the drug to silence his mind, but he still couldn't. A man who is not afraid of death, because he is already dead, and has no reason to live, lives because he doesn't care. Violent like his brothers.

Until he meets Grace, and she changed his life. I really like how Steven Knight and Cillian Murphy talk about Grace, saying that "she is Tommy's savior, even though he doesn't deserve it". "He felt like he was healing with her." Neither the drug nor the family, nor any other woman, could achieve, what she achieved, give him a little of the peace that Tommy had lost in that war. She silenced his demons, he didn't hear the shovels on the wall and he could finally sleep, if she was by his side.

I think she's the only one who reached that point, because neither Esme nor Linda managed to reach that high point with John and Arthur. Tommy did feel, for a short time, what it means to be a normal man again, what it means to have peace of mind.

But she died and so died his peace and the only humanity he had left. Her death was a trauma even greater than the war. Because where the shovels were on the wall, it was now replaced by the sound of Grace's last breath. And sometimes his hallucinations. And that's when we see how little by little he becomes more violent and more toxic.

He marries again, and his marriage is quite similar to that of Arthur and Linda.

Lizzie, like Linda, have the fantasy that they can change them, they believe they are saviors, but it is a fantasy, it is a lie, that they tell themselves, in order to stay in that marriage and for it to make sense. At the end of both marriages, it was them, Tommy and Arthur, who changed them, bringing the darkness they always carried inside to the surface. .The two, at some point in their marriage, ended up pointing a gun at their husbands. That's how dark and toxic the two marriages became.

I believe that we can see the traumas of the three brothers through their marriages. And I think that for Tommy, the death of Grace, and for Arthur, the death of John, were the traumas that led them to increase and worsen the first one, the war.

[angelsdean]

oh the cathartic impala grief rage scene my beloved. oh the staring off into the distance with the lip and chin wobbling. oh baby boy. he lost his dad. he loved him. he hated him. he didn't deserve what was put on him. he doesn't know what to do. he has the weight of the world (john's last words) on his shoulders. part of him is still forever just a little boy, curled up in a too big leather jacket, wanting his dad to just make everything ok. but he's all alone, shouldering his own grief and trying to keep up a strong front bc he knows sam is avoiding his own grief. gotta stay strong for sammy, gotta look out for sammy, the first order his dad ever gave him. holding that close to his chest while he swims in the agony of john's last order, save him or kill him. and it's all too much, it's all too much so he lets it all out, in arguably a perfectly healthy way, like screaming into a pillow or punching a bag (also he knows he will fix her right back up. he's done it before he will do it again). but the car is also a symbol for dean himself, all that anger hurt grief is still swirling around within him, still coming to blows within him. it's dean screaming at his own face in his mind as he one day will, saying he didn't deserve this!!! he didn't deserve what john put on him!!! anyways, i love you impala grief catharsis scene

[exactlyyoungchaos]

till forever falls apart.

bestfriendSimon x F!Reader

Part 2.

CW: Character death, trauma, angst, inaccurate military stuff, fluff, probable smut, mental health issues. Proceed with Caution!!!!!

(not proofread, it's 4.30 in the morning here)

It's been five months, six days, twelve hours, and counting since you reunited with Simon in that cafe. Life has been great since then.

He has changed a lot, he's quieter, more gruff, and talks through grunts only. he had scars both physically and emotionally, but you didn't care about any of that. He was your Simon, the only boy you ever loved.

he told you a lot about his life after you left, his job, his teammates his scars, but there were still many things to know and love. You told him stuff about your life, and now that you had him again, all you had was time. to live your life and grow old with him.

he promised you that this assignment would be the last one, after that, he was all yours.

you didn't want him to quit something he loved. but all he said was "It's bout' time love. I have you now, I don't need anything else."

The day you sent him off was very emotional for you. you had just met him again and didn't wanna let him go. You wanted to stay with him.

It was lonely after he left, it felt like somebody took oxygen away from you making it hard to breathe again. His letters and short calls were the only things that kept you from spiraling into depression but you pulled through, just for him.

now you were waiting for his return eagerly. This was the last time you'd ever have to. After this, it was just you and him.

You hadn't heard from him in a few days but you knew he would return today. You cleaned the whole apartment, made his favorite meal, and wore his favorite dress of yours to welcome him.

you were still fussing over the food as your doorbell rang. your heart skipped a beat in excitement. why is he ringing the doorbell? you mused as you went to open the door. Maybe he lost his keys or something...

You opened the door. " welcome back, Si...." but confusion slammed into you when you realized it wasn't Simon but his captain John Price, standing in his full glory.

It was easy to recognize him after Simon had shown you so many pictures of him and his teammates.

"Captain? What are you doing here? Where's Simon? he didn't tell me his team was coming too but it's alright..."

"love" he cuts you off in a soft voice, eyes full of emotion.

That's when you see it, the dog chains in his hand. The same chain Simon had around his neck. You look at him and understanding dawns on you.

"I'm so sorry, luv," he starts

but you stop him.

" No. this isn't funny Mr. Price. Where is he? Where Simon?" you asked harshly.

your heart was beating out of your chest, your vision got blurry.

One look at his face and it all came crashing down.

No, no, no, no. This isn't happening. you kept chanting in your head as Simons's words came back rushing to you

"This's the last one lovie, after that, it's you and me."

He wasn't gone. he can't be gone. you just got him back.

You felt the world tilting on its axis and suddenly two strong arms held you up.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" a soft voice whispered above you. You didn't care about any of that.

He was gone. Simon was gone. Just like that.

You felt John sitting you down on the sofa and he knelt in front of you.

you looked at him. looked at the man who came to tell you that your future would not be here anymore.

"How?" is all you managed to get out. Simon wasn't a rookie, he didn't make mistakes. He was The Ghost.

"Took the bullet meant for Soap," he told you softly.

Soap. you knew that name, but none of it was registering.

Simon is dead. He left you. Permanently.

you can't sit on the laptop and stalk every Simon in the world in hopes of finding yours. he was gone. the one person you gave your whole life searching for, is gone, not coming back.

why? why did this always happen to you? you never asked anything from anyone, never meant bad for anyone. never cursed anyone, then why?

Why would the universe do this do you? take the one thing that kept you going all these years. Do you not deserve it? was your destiny cursed like this?

you gave everything up just for him, sacrificed everything, your life, your innocence all to just find him and when you finally did, he was taken away from you.

why was this world so cruel? what have you done to deserve this? Is this a sign? your life was over now. was this the end?

tears kept coming out of your eyes as you sat and stared at the wall. you didn't scream or shout. just sat there and willed that this nightmare would be over. but it didn't.

John sat there, in front of you, looking at your state. Simon told him all about his bird. That he found her again.

"Gonna lock her down Cap'n, the second I get out of here."

But he didn't make it out. John failed him, he failed his team. Now that he stared at your faraway gaze, he realized that he failed you too.

but none of that mattered to you. You couldn't feel anything but everything at the same time.

you were numb but every part of you ached for something that's gone. Claws were ripping your insides out. Your heart ripped out from you. You were bleeding inside, and all of the wounds you had acquired over the years that were not on your skin were open and throbbing.

and no one was to blame.

It was in the lines of your hands and the scroll of your fate to never have something you want. You hoped and prayed that this time it would be different. But it wasn't.

everything you touch becomes sick with sadness or death. you weren't worthy of any grace by the universe.

so it took away the only person you ever called yours. The only one who knew you for who you are. what you are.

He was gone, all that was left of him was the memory of his faint chuckle and the crinkle in the corner of his eye when you said something ridiculous, the rumble in his chest when you hugged him, the feel of his lips on your own, his clothes in the closet that you shared and the house that was in his name. nothing else.

you had nothing else anymore.

UHMMMMM!!! HIII! THIS IS I. ALI. AND I APOLOGIZE FOR THE HURT CAUSED BY THIS.

I hope you guys liked it. I'm still writing part 3 of Loml. so enjoy this in the meantime.

I'm struggling with where to take this story next. Do you guys have any ideas? if you do, please suggest them in my inbox. And do tell me if you want to be tagged in the next part.

Thank you so much for reading!!!!

Until next time!!!

ALI-💋💋💋