#ford i can't predict

[mysoulspiralbound]

ford didn't think it was worth the risk to bring himself back, he was furious with stanley for doing so. but when bill threatened the kids? he almost made a deal. he was willing to end the rest of the world if it kept *his* family safe. so i think ultimately it depends. i think ford would hesitate, but he would be extremely conflicted about whatever answer he chose.

to ford, stanley knocked him into the portal carelessly, and clearly stanley blames himself, even if he doesn't think it's his fault. if stanley fell? it would be on ford. his lack of safety features. his refusal to destroy his own work. his insistence on bringing stanley to gravity falls in the first place. coupled with the guilt ford seems to show when he doesn't stick up to stanley in the back story ep, i think ford would blame himself for stanley's fate.

the question is simply "is all that enough to justify risking it all." Mabel and Stanley choose with their hearts when it comes down to it. Ford and Dipper are far more likely to rationalize and compartmentalize. Ultimately, I think Ford would try and find Stan, but he would prioritize trying to find a way to bring him back safely. this goes extra for when Ford eventually has the kids with him. i also think he's more likely to tell the kids what happened (since dipper is research minded and ford's not faking his identity) meaning i could see the kids being the one to pull the switch to bring stanley back, not ford.

was chatting with my brother about gravity falls (again) and i said something like “man, can you believe stan waited and worked for 30 years just for the chance to try and bring his brother back?” to which my brother responded, “yeah, it’s nuts when you think about it. i wonder if stan got trapped in the multiverse instead, if ford would do the same.” HELLO???

[achromaticegoist]

THE BOOK OF BILL TINY RANT (SPOILERS)

STOP. I CAN'T DO THIS TUMBLR. okay okay, I GOT IT DELIVERED LIKE 3 HOURS AGO AND I COMPLETELY FINISHED IT 😭😭😭🙏

I ACTUALLY CAN'T DO THIS ANYYYMOREEE. I SWEAR TO GOD I WAS GIGGLING, KICKING, SCREAMING MY HEAD OFF THE ENTIRE TIME READING THIS STUPID THING.

Did ALEX LIKE, *SCROLL* through FANDOM while making this entire thing BECAUSE WHY DID SO MANY PEOPLE LOWKEY EAT WITH THEIR OLD HEADCANONS? SUPPOSED TO BE THE DEATH OF ALL OUR HEADCANONS RIGHT??? EVERYONE PREDICTED AT LEADT SOMETHING LMFAOOOOO.

AND IF ANY OF YALL FOLLOW GRAVITY FALLS : AMBER SKIES BY JOZLYN MOON, THE POST WEIRDMAGGEDON SCAR THING BEING A PREDICTION IS FUCKING *CRAAAZY*

AND THE FACT THAT THEY KEPT COMPATING HIM TO THE DEVIL AND SHIT, LUCIFER REFERENCES AND "FALLEN ANGLE?" MY GUYYYYY the actual BALLS it takes to write this because I GASPED SO LOUDLY AT SO MUCH SHIT.

AND I WAS SUPER DAMN EXCITED ABOUT THE HENCHMANIACS ONE

GUYS THEYRE SO FUCKING STUPID 😭😭😭😭😭😭🙏 WHY ARE THEY ALL SO STUPID 😭😭😭😭 IM DYING OF LAUGHTER

SO MANY PEOPLE LOWKEY GOT SOME KIND OF BEEF WITH PYRONICA?? WHY ARE THEY SO INVOLVED WITH HER??? THEY HAVE A GROUPCHAT OH MY GOD THEYRE SO BESTIE CODED

Again I'm STILL FREAKING OUT ABOUT JHESELBRAUM THANK YOU VERY MUCH. I WILL SURVIVE ON THESE CRUMBS SO DAMN MUCH

TIME BABY IS A FUCKING COCOMELON ENJOYER 😭 HELPPPPPPPPP

GGGGGUYYYYS? WHAT? OH MY GOD?? WHAT THE FUCK?? IM SCREAMIGN. NO NONONO YOU CANT DO THIS TO ME THE ANGST.

AND NO. THE WAY BILL AND FORD HERE WERE FUCKKKK THATS SOME GOOD FUCKING TOXIC BILLFORD. DUDE NAH IM LIKE GASPING FOR AIR RIGHT NOW BECAUSE HOLY SHIT SOME OF THE STUFF HERE IS SICK BUT I CAN'T HELP BUT LIKE

AND THE

IM FREAKING

AAAA

FORD DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER THOSE PAGES MADE ME TEAR UP A LITTLE 😭😭😭🙏 NOOOOO

AND THOSE *SCRAPS* OF BILL'S BACKSTORY. GUYS CHAT NO I AM SCREAMING. SILLY STRAW CHILDHOOD TRAUMA LOWKEY WENT HARD AND HIS FAMILY AND THE *FUCKING SPECK OF HIS HOME DIMENSION*.

THAT ONE LITTLE TV SCREEN WITH THE EDWIN A ABBOT FLATLAND DIAGRAM IN THE BOOK THOUGH NAH CUZ FANDOM ATE WITH THAT ONE.

AA. AAAAAAAA. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AND WHAT THE FUCK 😭🙏🙏 DIPPERS HISTORY WAS SO FUNNY I COULDNT STOP LAUGHING BRO ALSO WENT THROUGH THE GREEN MNM STAGE

AND IM NOT EVEN GOING TO TALK ABOUT THE COLLEEN BALLINGER***** APOLOGY REFERENCE THAT SHIT WAS SO DAMN FUNNY.

ALSO THE ENDING??? WHAT THE--THERAPY? NO BRCUASE THIS IS ACTUALLY SOME MESSED UP THERAPY SHIT. That is NOT how you try and heal someone holy fucking hell. Guy is getting more and more broken

CHAT I AM SOBBING AND SHAKING AND CRYING AND READY TO IMMERSE MYSELF FULLY IN THE GRAVITY FALLS FANDOM RN, STILL VERY MUCH ACTIVE IN HAZBIN HOTEL BUT GOD MOTHERFUCKIN DAMMMMMMMMNNNN THIS IS SOMETHING TO UNPACK.

[nowimjustastranger]

Somebody to Call My Own Timeline

Don't put me on blast if this is incorrect, I had to tweak the canon timeline since Ford doesn't meet Bill/build the portal. Fiddleford's timeline was also altered to fit the narrative.

May 1969:

Ford & Stan are 17

Stan is kicked out

September 1969:

Ford & Stan are 18 (their birthday is June 15th)

Unable to find the funds for a better college endeavor, Ford attends Backupsmore University. His roommate is Fiddleford just like in canon.

June 1970:

Stan commits suicide on their 19th birthday.

Ford falls into a depression & Fiddleford helps him keep up in college while he grieves. Their bond grows deeper because of this, closer to family than friends when Ford eventually puts himself back together.

June 1974:

Ford graduates three years ahead of schedule at 23 years old.

He moves to Gravity Falls w/ Fiddleford to continue their research concerning dimension travel.

They design and build the first prototype of the wormhole gun, scraping it to try again when the results are decidedly explosive.

Ford is working on drafting blueprints for a side project, it's the first stages of what will become the technology that will allow him to predict/alter the future.

January 1981:

Ford is 31

Ford & Fiddleford complete the final version of the wormhole gun.

They begin testing with inanimate objects.

The future reader is a handheld device, unpolished and clunky, but it works and that's what matters.

Fiddleford refines the design to make it work better, compacting the technology into a repurposed biker helmet. The visor also acts as a screen, displaying the encoded data for Ford to read.

Fiddleford wants Ford to hide his identity while traveling the multiverse since he's in possession of revolutionary and dangerous technology. Ford agrees that it would be for the best.

January 1982:

Ford is 32

Ford uses the wormhole gun to enter the multiverse for the first time.

Ford remains in contact w/ Fiddleford using a special radio that locks onto it's twin's frequency even across dimensions.

Ford uses an altered version of the unicorn hair spell to seal off his dimension (it was Fiddleford's idea to protect their dimension from potential threats). Only Ford knows how to get inside.

February 1982:

Ford is still 32

Ford meets Bill.

Bill helps Ford adjust to the multiverse, teaching him tricks and skills to survive.

Ford finds Bill interesting because he can't see into Bill's future, his curiosity about the entity blinding him to Bill's true intentions.

Ford studies Bill with the demon's consent, and they become friends in the process.

Bill keeps trying to sweet talk/trick Ford into making a deal w/ him in order to get into Ford's head and find the cipher so he can read the data about the future, but Ford declines each time.

Bill can't just take the helmet from Ford because it has unicorn hair embedded in the frame.

March 1984:

Ford is 34

Bill drops the act and betrays Ford.

Fiddleford loses contact w/ Ford after the radio is destroyed by Bill when the demon takes Ford captive.

One of Bill's human pets (a resident of the conquered dimension) removes the helmet from Ford's head since Bill himself can't touch it, Bill keeping it as a trophy while he attempts to break Ford.

March 1994:

Ford is 44

Bill tortures Ford for ten years, trying to get Ford to either make a deal or just tell him how to read the encoded data. Ford won't budge.

Fiddleford, not knowing what else to do, maintains the shack in Gravity Falls in the hopes that Ford will return one day.

Fiddleford also tries to track Ford down using the helmet's signal, but he's had no success so far.

Bill slips up by not bothering to chain Ford up after a fresh round of torture, Ford taking the opportunity to build a bomb with the destructive power of a black hole while Bill is busy greeting his freaks.

The Axolotl saves Ford's life by pulling him out of the dimension right as the bomb goes off. The Axolotl heals Ford's body, but the mental and emotional wounds from his imprisonment remain.

April 1994:

Ford is still 44

Ford fully commits himself to his mission to travel the multiverse, helping numerous versions of his brother get a happy ending.

Ignores his trauma like a boss.

He doesn't return to his dimension, unable to face Fiddleford and the questions he'd inevitably ask about where Ford had been for the past ten years. Emotional repression at it's finest.

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to Ford, Fiddleford was finally able to pinpoint where the helmet is. So Fiddleford knows Ford is alive, but he isn't sure why Ford hasn't come back yet.

This causes Fiddleford to obsess over the helmet, half convinced that Ford's dead and that someone else is in possession of the device.

So his next project is to somehow confirm whether or not Ford is the one wearing the helmet, planning to deactivate the device if Ford's dead.

June 2006:

Ford is 57, 13 years have passed since he was saved.

Ford comes across the Stan from dimension 77/H and ends up nabbing him from his dimension.

Ford has far more advanced technology than what earth is capable of, taking inspiration from the dimensions he's visited to design a tattoo made of nanobots that allow him to teleport short distances, he still has to use the gun for long distances. But if he can see his destination, he can teleport there with the tattoo. The ink is red and the tattoo is the outline of the Stan o' War.

Fiddleford had long since figured out that Ford was still in possession of the helmet due to scanning his brainwaves and comparing them to the brainwaves he has on record from the initial testing of the helmet.

After confirming that the brainwaves are an exact match, Fiddleford then locks the helmet biometrically so only Ford's brainwaves can activate/operate it, giving himself peace of mind by adding the extra security measure.

[f-imaginings]

If the concept is bill and ford interacting through the rift youre right why have we not seen people do that before, thats brilliant. “Great uncle ford why does the rift call you babygirl?” Poor ford

This person gets it!!!!! This person predicted my favourite scenes in the new chapter!!!

The line in journal three about the rift "if you hold it up to your ear you can hear the sound of mocking laughter" why haven't more people drawn ford or bill both obsessively listening to the rift??!!! Ford making a containment unit so he can take the rift with him everywhere "just in case I learn something to stop bills crusade of evil" yeah right you just want to listen to the one person who always made you feel special. Then there's bill, scooping the rift up into his tophat so it can also always be on his person, watching ford through the rift when he gets a five minute break from feigning customer service "making deals and getting ready for the big day" being SO FRUSTRATED that he can't just be there already, that he can't just reach through and touch Ford when he's being all melodramatic and lonely in the lab BC Stanley doesn't want him around the kids.

This has been my brainworm for so long and I'm watching the billford renaissance doing fabulous things with all the concepts I always loved about the pairing but y'all missed a spot!!!!!

Now it has come to everyones attention, here's the deal, I want you all to go forth and make the art pls. I'll be here waiting to reblog every speck of art 😊

[realmsalot]

I've been obsessed with Relativity Falls au for some reason lately so of course I've been turning around my own version in my head lately. And with Fiddleford I keep flip flopping on who I would switch him because there are many good options. Like

Fiddleford <> Pacifica:

This seems to be the most popular option, I've seen many old woman Pacifica designs, but I personally cannot see McGucket be the snotty rich kid that Pacifica was at the start. I CAN see how he could be rich (Tate McGucket probably invented something and got a lot of money for it) but CAN'T see him be anyway snotty about it. I think the best way to make Fiddleford fit this role is through a series of misunderstandings. He is trying SO HARD to be nice to these twin brothers who are spending their summer in Gravity Falls and he just keeps messing up. He tries to make a robot to help them out but it end up turning evil and they assume that it was ment to sabotage them from the start. He tries to have a nice conversation with them but because he's rich he's just out touch enough to come off rude and show offy. FIDDS IS TRYING TO BE NICE FROM THE START!

Fiddleford <> Candy

It is easily the second most popular option here. There really isn't much to say with this one it's probably the one that makes the most sense. I can easily see Candy going to Backupsmore and telling Dipper/Mabel about the weird things shes seen in Gravity Falls. The idea that Stanley and Fidds became friends first before Ford and Fidds is interesting. My main grip with it is that if we're going with the version where Dipper is swapped with Ford, it implies that Mable and Candy never really became friends in this universe, which I find really sad. Honestly I think that the main reason this swap exists in that context is because of that one episode were they go on a road trip and Candy got crush on Dipper mixed with fact that many people ship FiddleAuthor.

Fiddleford <> Soos

Hear me out, hear me OUT! I've seen a few versions where even when Soos' Grandma is swapped with Soos, they also add Fidds as a handyman at the Shack anyways. But why not go the whole way, ya'know? Soos was a friend that Dipper met and shared a dorm with in Backupsmore. Soos was still older than Dipper. Soos and Melody were already married with a kid on the way, and Soos was also Gravity Falls' local handyman. He decided to get college and get like a mechanical engineering degree or maybe a trade in something there because even in the small town of Gravity Falls technology was only getting more and more complicated and Soos wanted to be able to keep up so he can keep making money for his family by fixing things. During their time at Backupsmore, Soos would tell Dipper about some of the crazy things he's seen living in Gravity Falls, and that inspires Dipper to go study it after college. And then the rest of that rolls out predictably. I can easily (and sadly) see Soos becoming the local kook. I imagine that it will also be much sadder for the locals to see Soos acting up because many of them have memories of him coming to fix their microwaves and stuff. And as for Fidds, he's the Mystery Shack's handyman. You can make him around the same age as the Stan twins, we know that in cannon that Soos started working there around that age, so he doesn't have to be Soos' cannon age. I think this works best with Dipper and Ford switching places because in cannon Dipper and Soos were friends, so it kinda easily transfers, ya'know. I've put a lot in this one.

And uh yeah that's my incoherent ramblings...

[fiddlefordisms]

Canon Details and Analysis of Fiddleford McGucket Part 2

See the first part here

Let's flash-forward to what we know about Fiddleford after college. At some point, he got married to Emma May Dixon, and they had a son together (Tate McGucket), they live in Palo Alto, and Fiddleford seems to be self-employed: McGucket's Computermajigs. Now, don't get me wrong I enjoy Fiddauthor quite a lot (and I'll give some in-depth analysis and theorizing and thinking of possibilities about that particular relationship in that context at the very end), but I want to focus on Fiddleford's character and what we do know about his wife and child.

We know from Journal 3 that Fiddleford keeps a picture of his wife and son on his desk because he says it helps keep him "grounded." It's very important to note that this picture includes his wife - if they really wanted to imply that Fiddleford's relationship with his wife was on the rocks, they could've easily made it just a picture of his son. We know that Fiddleford must have had strong feelings for his wife because in the Gobblewonker episode of Gravity Falls, Old Man McGucket claims that when his wife left him, he built a pterodactyl-tron (building giant death robots is something he does when he's upset or wants attention). If he was wanting to leave that relationship, he would not have been upset about her leaving him.

In another page of Journal 3 when Fiddleford quits the portal project, Ford writes about how he should "go back to his doting family." This tells us that while Fiddleford and Emma May did have a fight over him not getting her a Christmas present, Ford still somehow had the impression that his family was "doting." I think it's important to point out that Fiddleford has been erasing his memories since the Gremloblin incident - and the fight scene with his wife happens very shortly before the big portal test. We know the memory-erasing gun has side effects. So, anytime Fiddleford "forgets" something should be looked at as highly suspect and indicative that his memory-erasing gun is affecting him.

We know that Fiddleford must have been a good father before he left to work on the portal for Ford via context clues. In the show, despite Tate's original home being in Palo Alto, Tate chose to pack up his things and live in Gravity Falls where his mentally-addled father now lives. He chose to do that and seeing what became of his father, even though he's the town's biggest embarrassment with a reputation for being a crazy old man - chose to stay. In Shmeb U Unlocked, we're informed that Tate is extremely intelligent and capable of predicting lottery numbers.

He could literally go anywhere he wanted if he wanted. And yet, he stays in Gravity Falls where his father lives. He must have really loved his father despite it being so hard with his father's mental state and the fact that he has every right to be angry that his father left. We know that Fiddleford must have really loved his son because of that picture on his desk, because much later even with all of his memory problems, he still remembers his son, and he's desperate to spend time with him, and in the end, they're able to repair their relationship and spend quality time together.

Now, let's talk about a couple of details that I think a lot of people overlook. During the stargazing scene in Journal 3, Fiddleford mentions offhand that he'd like a place where "the screen door ain't broken." I think this is a VERY interesting detail because it makes it sound like Fiddleford's business hadn't quite taken off yet and that he might have been struggling financially because he can't afford to get his door repaired.

This opens a doorway into a theory of mine that Fiddleford is being paid for his time as Ford's assistant. Now, we're not told this outright in Journal 3, but I think we can gather this from a little thing I like to call context clues. After all, Ford probably thought the exact nature of payment deals for his assistant didn't need to be included in his research and personal journal. There's nothing interesting about it. Additionally from a narrative standpoint, it might have come across as looking like Ford had to bribe Fiddleford to help him, and that's not the vibe they wanted for Fiddleford. They wanted to emphasize that these two are at the very least good friends and that Fiddleford is the type of person who will set aside his own personal projects and self-sacrifice to help a friend at a moment's notice.

We know from the show and Journal 3 that Ford was given grants to study the anomalies of Gravity Falls. Presumably, this money would not only cover the costs of field research equipment and a research base (the shack) but also money for a research assistant if needed.

Fiddleford's wife would have to be the most permissive, most doormat wife in THE HISTORY OF EVER to allow her husband to go up to Oregon to work on a project leaving her to not only take care of her son by herself but also have to pay all the bills and rent/mortgage by herself. We know this is not the case because she (rightly) did NOT let it slide that her husband forgot to get her a Christmas present.

Fiddleford would not have had much time to work on his own business while working on Ford's portal. At this point in his life, he has his mental faculties intact, he's proven time and again to be considerate and sweet (Alex Hirsch even refers to him as a sweet soul). He's big on making thoughtful gifts, he wants to help others (in Journal 3, he is seen fixing up the ferris wheel at the carnival where he meets Ivan, although it was definitely wrong - he had good intentions in wanting to help people with their bad memories, even in the show - Old Man McGucket shows up in the sap-hole with the dinosaurs having fixed a broken lantern - Fiddleford is exactly the type of person who would see a broken-down car on the side of the road and pull over and get out his toolbox and help that person out), and he loves his family very much. He would NOT let them go unsupported and floundering for themselves while in his right mind.

So, this leads me to believe that to help convince his wife to let him help his old college buddy with his project, he'd be getting paid for his help. Ford likely would've found this reasonable and might have suggested it himself if Fiddleford expressed wanting to help but not being able to leave his family without any support. It probably wasn't a lot, but it might have been a bit better than what he was currently drumming up via his own business. This could also be why Ford is so adamant about referring to Fiddleford as his assistant in the journals rather than his friend.

Do I think his wife might have still had some reservations about her husband going to Oregon and could be a fertile field for argument later? Yes. Absolutely. But I think the fact that she let him go in the first place and the fact that Fiddleford is self-employed rather than more conventionally employed generally shows that she was a supportive wife and trusted her husband.

I absolutely DO NOT think, as some have posited, that Fiddleford abandoned his wife and son (especially his son whom he dearly loves) to have a "Brokeback Mountain" situation with Stanford. That is a terrible misreading of Fiddleford's character AND the situation. Again, Fiddleford is the type of person who HELPS people, and how much more so for someone who is likely his best friend? Not only that, but his FIRST EVER friend. A friend who Fiddleford probably knows has been alone in Oregon for years and who also has a hard time making friends, a friend who probably doesn't call him enough because he's "busy" with his research (Ford even says in the journal that he "has no choice but to call Fiddleford"), a friend who is probably stubborn about asking for help who is asking HIM (the guy who helps) for help?

Fiddleford might even already be worried about him.

And this is a "project" - a project has a beginning and an end. Fiddleford was NOT expecting to stay in Gravity Falls. He was going to go there, help Ford, and then go back to his family whom he loves. I'm not saying complicated feelings couldn't have arisen (again, I am a Fiddauthor shipper), but I am saying that Fiddleford didn't go to Oregon because he was running away from marital problems with his wife (on an additional note - people are free to write what they want - But what is WITH bisexual erasure and villifying / ignoring female characters? I mean, just because she wasn't in the show or talked about much doesn't mean we should do female characters a disservice) and intending on cheating on her.

Because again - A) He loves his family (family photo on his desk which doesn't exactly scream "Make sweet love to me Ford") B) His anxiety issues C) His empathy - he doesn't have the narcissistic traits cheaters generally have D) He's likely Catholic and all the religious hang-ups with that - (also adultery being a sin is mentioned waaaaaay more than homosexuality) E) The hostile time period for queer folks.

Also, Stanford "I find romance baffling" (Journal 3 - stargazing scene) is probably one of the biggest indicators that no cheating went on (but I'll throw you "cheating Fiddleford" headcanoners a bone much later on in which I think a possible "cheating" scenario could have realistically occurred - and I'll tell you my reasons for why I personally don't believe that happened either, but I'll begrudgingly accept a "possibility" and let you guys go nuts with the idea.)

More to come in later parts.

[ckret2]

So in your Bill fic, you’ve established that even as a human, he can see out of obvious depictions of himself (much easier when there’s also a part of himself on said depiction like saliva or hair) sort of see the 4th dimension. (See before-images, look “over” walls, and such) and can predict scratch card winners just from seeing a picture on a phone and generally has foresight for those kind of weird things.

Now I wonder just how much of that are things normal humans technically could do with training, and how much of it is because Bill is a weird alien creature in a human body.

Cause I’m pretty sure Bills theory that the reincarnation device just stitched his normal triangular soul to a human body really tightly is correct- at least I want to believe it - and that the weird things Goldie can do is a sign of that. Goldie is obviously not a normal human- as he literally sprang out of the ground and has those weird buggy eyes, but humans are still plenty capable of weird magic stuff like curses and astral projecting.

I know it’s definitely something that’ll be elaborated on as more chapters come out, but I was just curious how much you can reveal at this point in the story.

He doesn't have any "foresight" beyond the before-images (and after-images). All of his psychic abilities are tied to his eyeballs. If an event (present, past, or future) isn't literally in his field of view, he can't see it. Being able to see through (i.e., "over") objects includes seeing through walls and through the scratchy stuff on scratch cards—he's not "predicting" scratch card winners in the future, he's just looking at what's written on the scratch cards in the present.

Humans can see into the 4th dimension if they know how. Ford's eye bled after being possessed; Bill's eye bleeds when he looks through objects; he's doing the same thing in his human body that he was doing in Ford's body. Any human's eyeballs can "bend" into the 4th dimension if they know how, and Bill knows how.

I probably won't directly explore exactly how Bill got his ability to see through other depictions of himself, so you can imagine it works however u want lol. What IS true about it is that, however it works, Bill's still worrying about what shape his soul is, so clearly it doesn't work via a mechanism that would reassure him that his soul's still triangular.

[thetardisisnotourdivision]

Silly prediction for Empire of Death.

If they do get Carole Ann Ford back as Susan, I'd love them to do a scene like in The Empty Hearse in Sherlock. Like the Doctor's doing six things at once and trying to find the thingamajig which, it turns out, he'd have gotten far earlier if he'd just LOOKED at the random old lady who kept talking to him.

Something like:

Susan: oh, it's nice in here, isn't it? Doctor (not looking up): how did you get into the tower? Susan: I have my ways. Used to travel a lot. You pick things up.  Doctor (figuring out a complex formula because the world is about to end): well just stay over there and shut up, ok? Susan: I might have the answer? Doctor: no, you don't, just stay there.  Susan: I could always come back and help you later.  Doctor: please don't distract me.  Susan: I don't get anxieties, you know. And I don't cry, either. So I could be a good help. After all, we don't want a time war on our hands because of hysterical delays. Y'know. A race against the clock. Time. War.  Susan: and of course, a lot of problems look BIGGER than they are. Susan: on the inside. Doctor: sure, fine.  Susan (basically just having fun now): ooo, that police box is nice.  Doctor: that's my TARDIS, stay away from it.  Susan: TARDIS? What does that stand for? Doctor (as Susan mouths the words exactly as he says them): Time and Relative Dimension in Space, now stop talking.  Susan: haven't seen a police box since… ooo, November 1963?  Doctor: I really don't need this right now.  Susan: my husband used to say that there were a few up in BEDFORD, but I never saw them. (pointedly) DAVID. My husband's name was DAVID.  Doctor (not listening): wonderful.  Susan: and my kids. Who I named after people I loved. DAVID, IAN and BARBARA. They used to say that one day they'd go to SPACE and see MARINUS and SKARO like MUM DID.  Doctor: fantastic. Please be quiet.  Susan: you really are stupid, aren't you? Doctor: I'm currently trying to save all your lives, now shut up and let me work.  Susan: it'd be a shame if the planet got destroyed simply because nobody thought to ask the little old lady any questions.  Doctor: you've talked quite enough already.  Susan: after all, it is TELEPATHIC POWER you need. PSYCHIC POWERS. LIKE YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER.  Doctor: … Doctor: remind me to tell Kate to get better security on the Black Archive.  Susan: are you KIDDING me.  Susan: right. Ok. Perhaps you should look up the answer.  Doctor: Google can't help me here. Susan: no, I mean you should LOOK. UP.  *she makes him look at her and hands him the thingamajig he needed. Whatever is exploding immediately stops exploding.* Doctor: oh.  Susan: you get it now? Doctor: oh shit. 

Sorry for the long and weird post but I genuinely just think that something like this would be hilarious.

[icarusbetide]

wtf was hamilton actually like

yet another long rant about how little i really know about hamilton! this is in regards to his personality because i can't get him down. i can't figure out what he would've been like in everyday life.

for any historical figure, we take explicitly documented traits and build off of them. even if it's clumsy, i'd be confident "predicting" how washington & jefferson usually act, etc. but for some reason, ham's characterization is all over the place. his recorded personality traits, also mixed with his political attitudes, often conflict and authors end up leaning into certain parts. for instance: there's flirty & flamboyant ham. there's prideful, arrogant, standoffish ham. there's bumbling politics ham, obtuse and belligerent 24/7 - aka musical ham, but that was an intentional choice. there's even kind and warm ham, which definitely seems accurate for his family and close friends least.

was he loud and intense 24/7? or was that just him during work, since we also know that he had a habit of mumbling to himself and looking like a daydreamer to spectators?

some people said that his general countenance was serious and austere, but we also know that he could be a charmer in social spaces. he was described as feminine but also as "martial". some have written that there's an "simplicity" in his manners, and a clear openness, but we also speculate that he closed off some part of his emotions after laurens' death. he was constantly worried about his loved ones' health, like him tucking in judge ford, but we also know that he could ghost people mercilessly. was he guarded or was he not?

i guess i can pinpoint how he might have interacted with select people, like eliza, his children, washington. but i don't know which side of him was shown in the majority of his interactions - what the "real" him, or at least common him, would've been.

one of my fav descriptions of him notes how even his speech fluctuated:

“His language is not always equal; sometimes didactic like Bolingbroke’s; at other times light and tripping, like Sterne’s. His eloquence is not so defusive as to trifle with the senses, but he rambles just enough to strike and keep up the attention...His manners are tinctured with stiffness and sometimes with a degree of vanity that is highly disagreeable. “

and i recall another anecdote about how he was serious and made intelligent conversation at dinner, but became more of the flirty charming persona afterwards while socializing.

like all human beings he was multifaceted, but damn. i really can't confidently say "oh if you ran into hamilton in the street he would be really polite/reserved/kind/charming."

i guess all of this goes to say that this guy was insanely complex and i'm not sure if anyone, let alone himself, really figured it out. that's definitely why i'm interested in him as a figure, but ugh. frustrating when i'm writing and can feel myself slipping into a common ham archetype that i don't think is 100% accurate. and we didn't even get into how much of that is "real" or - adams' version.

[atalana]

current thought: that deleted scene from weirdmageddon of bill saying "you know i can't stand predictable!" to ford, vs this one

like yeah no given bill as a person i don't think he's lying about hating predictability

but also like. ford's very first attempt to impress him was to be unpredictable (an impossible task when someone can read your mind, as proven), and given everything about ford and how his self worth kinda hangs on being exceptional, since he never succeeded at fitting in he might as well stand out

i have a feeling bill used that one to get his own way a lot

[atomicjellycat]

I gotta get this itty bitty baby theory out JUST in case I'm right. I have never made a correct prediction on a show in my life.

BUT

if you type into the computer

'Season 3' it says 'season 2'

Type in 'season 2' you get 'season 1'

Type in 'season 1' we get 'season -1'

PERSONALLY my theory is we will get one more season, just the one, probably much shorter, like a really dense 12 episodes. but it'll be a prequel season that will encapsulate some early Bill, early ford and bill adventures, and watch it all go sour. It ends with their rough break up and Ford sending stan the 'Please come' post card.

I genuinely can't tell if I'm a genius or delusional but idgaf. I just have to get this out just in case I'm right for the first time and I can have proof on my rightness lmao

[jacksonleavesthe0nly138472]

sleepyhead

Pov: Ford

Fidds and me shut down the portal, he explained to me that I had a terrible head injury that must be why I don't remember anything. We were walking to the bedroom I notice that here is a weird number of triangles in the house, so I ask why, he said that he really didn't know why he loved triangles so much.

Suddenly we stop at the bed room he explained "okay ford here is only one bedroom in the house, which means one of us has to sleep on the couch" I look at him confused "oh wouldn't I have an apartment or house somewhere?" He took a minute to respond "Um your head injury is really bad, not bad enough to go to the doctors but I advice you to stay" okay that made sense, I got a strange thought in my head, for some reason made my head feel heated "you know it could be a good idea if, you and I sleep in the same bed, you could watch over me if my head injury becomes a problem"

His face went a dark red "well Stanford I think that's an brilliant idea" I love it when he says my name.

We're in bed together, is it a normal thing for two friends to sleep in the same bed, now that I'm thinking it over, actually have a crush on Fiddleford, I mean it makes sense why I feel all hot when it's winter, and how want him as close as physically possible to me. That makes me think, have I told him of this before, and was he not interested in me. Tomorrow I will ask him this and many more questions.

Finally I went to sleep instead of over thinking about our relationship, it was quite a weird dream, I was in a place were there was books and papers floating everywhere, in the hole place was scattered with stars and math equations in the background. Randomly a triangle popped out of nowhere, he looked very dapper with his bow tie and top hat.

"Hey ya sixer how's the portal going" what the heck the weird triangle thing can speak? "Oh hi dapper trian" he rudely interrupted me "MY NAME IS BILL, you idiots" "jess I didn't know your name before and before you rudely interrupted me, I was going to" again HE INTERRUPTED ME "what the hell IQ, you KNOWN me for years, are you playing a stupid game on ME" jessus this triangle man is so rude "no I AM NOT PLAYING A GAME, if you'd just let me talk, maybe you won't be so confused" "okay then talk Fordy, because this is really frustrating you know" I pause for moment than starting talking "so to put it briefly, I suffered a head injury and now I have amnesia and can't remember anything"

Instead of been understanding this bill character, he literally turned red when he got angry and thrown an temper tantrum. "WHERE THE EVER LIVING HELL IS ALL YOUR MEMORIES" I round my eyes "it's not like I just told you" predictably got more frustrated "IF YOU GOT AMNESIA YOU WOULD STILL HAVE ALL YOUR MEMORIES" I was about to say something but than he just disappeared.

Woke up with me laying on Fidds chest, don't know how I got in this position but I don't care it's nice, especially after that annoying dream guy. Gosh I'm so lucky that I forgot about that guy, the fact that I knew that man before must be annoyance to my past self. I know Fidds like triangles but he can't like this guy, plus he's not even real, what is 'bill the triangle guy' going to do if I talk trash about him. Was kind of sad that Fiddleford woke up he looks so cute asleep, "hey ya Ford we got a busy day today, haven't we, got to dismantle the portal and than get your memories back"

Oh forgot that "alright, business is good, keeps the mind busy hahahah" Fidds looks at me in a compassionate manner "gosh somethings never change" if that was someone else saying that I would of thought it was a rude remark. "Hey um I have something to tell you before we get started" he looked a bit irritated now "yes ford what is it" "well I know this is going to sound weird, but I saw a triangle named Bill in my dreams" okay now I'm thinking it over it was a stupid idea to bring it. He just looks so annoyed now "REALLY STANFORD, I thought that you would know that dreams can be weird, and WHY WOULD I NEED TO KNOW THIS?"

I felt like a complete idiot now "sorry I shouldn't of said anything, let's just get back what we were doing"

Note: did a quick drawing, I want you guys opinion on me doing a drawing on most chapters, should I do it no or yes

[stupidlittlespirit]

So, I'd love to pick your brain, if I could. (Bc wow you weren't kidding abt ppl ovulating gender-neutrally in your inbox lmao)

Let's suppose that Ford DOES get lucky and it becomes a regular thing with his s/o. Let's suppose that they are around each other at the Shack more often than not. (BTW this isn't meant to be me digging for Spores sequel info, it's just me thinking)

Stan's probably around. He's not blind. He's noticed that something has changed between his brother and reader. Does he tease anyone about it? Does he get all annoying and try to piss Ford off by being crude about it? I think part of him may even be a bit proud of his nerdy brother FINALLY getting some, and damn, how long will it take before Ford finally starts to fucking relax now that he's 'getting laid' on a regular basis? Probably makes some jokes like nobody can resist the silver fox effect, or that he knew all along that Ford would get lucky, seeing as how they share their good looks and Stan claims he's had to beat the ladies off with sticks.

And how would Ford handle someone, esp Stan, butting into his business?

I see him getting uptight and angry, honestly. It's between him and his s/o, Stans not included so hes not entitled to any knowledge. And he certainly isn't allowed to make crass jokes about something that Ford probably sees as... not sacred, necessarily, but definitely very serious, not to mention that he may be a little possessive and reluctant to allow Stan to even sully his s/os good name with such dirty thoughts.

It would probably be a minor tiff between them, though.

ahskhdfjs ikr I am always happy to give the floor to people who need to get their freak on, everyone is welcome.

Anyway, here's the thing: I can't answer this fully without spoiling the sequel so I'll answer it objectively below.

Stan is going to tease and prod and wind up as much as he possibly can, because he's Ford's brother and that's just what siblings do.

Ford is, predictably, going to snap back and reprimand his brother for being crass, and he's going to act affronted about the entire thing. It's rude and inappropriate and for god's sake, Stanley, you're just asking for a civil case with that kind of comment! Have some decency! It's none of Stan's business and he isn't going to kiss and tell, not for all the scientific credit in the world.

Whereas Reader is probably just going to play it cool (even though they are embarrassed) and bat the comment back with something equally as witty in order to save face.

I think Ford is very old fashioned and proper, and shy, about all things of that nature, so he'd be annoyed by Stan making such comments and he wouldn't be afraid to let him know.

I think (my) Reader would give Stan a taste of his own medicine and lean into them by giving him dry, crass answers back until Stan is too grossed out to keep trying.

[nowimjustastranger]

Somebody to Call My Own Lore | Part 1

I can't get enough of this trope so here I am, letting the brain worms win.

Edit: Refined the lore for this AU, so this is the revised version!

Trigger warning for suicide and torture! Neither are graphic.

Old Man Ford (Dimension 419"3) & Mullet Stan (Dimension 77/H)

While exploring the multiverse, Ford 419"3 had come to the distressing realization that Stan suffers in every dimension. So 419"3 Ford made it his mission in life to travel through dimensions and help as many variations of Stan get the happy ending that he deserves by stepping in to correct the course of the timeline to produce the best outcome.

The reason why Ford is so determined to alter Stan’s grim fate in so many dimensions is because Ford had lost his own Stan to suicide while he was still in college, which is what drove him to completely bury himself in his studies and invent dimension travel with Fiddleford. Ford had left time travel alone because he could never get the timeline to remain stable in his calculations, so going back and changing even the smallest detail could very well cause his dimension to collapse on itself (like the butterfly effect).

Ford uses a portal gun to jump between locations within a dimension and a wormhole gun to travel between dimensions.

Ford wears a black helmet with red accents, but his visor doubles as a screen and shows every choice and the paths that diverge from these choices until he can narrow the series of events down to one action. The data is encrypted so only he can read it.

Ford doesn’t have the data displayed all the time since he doesn't want to rely on it too heavily and also because it's not absolute. There are several choices and, while Ford can narrow them down, he can't know for sure how something will go down. So he tests the waters the old fashioned way, determining how to proceed based on how the targets react because then he knows what path is the most likely outcome and he can guide it back on course.

Yes, he does use the data during combat, it makes him practically omniscient. He doesn't utilize the data when dealing with a human (or humans) because he can handle that fight with ease. But in the multiverse, he’s normally going up against opponents who are stronger/more powerful than him, so he uses the data to give himself the advantage.

Because of Fiddleford McGucket, Ford can get involved in the timeline directly, carrying a gun that alters/erases memories. Unlike the memory gun in canon, Ford and Fiddleford worked on it together and tested it thoroughly (on Gnomes who volunteered) before ever using it on humans (cough themselves cough). It still has an addictive quality, but only when it's used on the same person several times, so Ford usually tries to only use it on someone once.

A few weeks after Ford officially started exploring the multiverse, he met a variation of Bill Cipher, who taught him the ropes (teaching him languages, helping him build a translator for alien languages that Ford physically couldn't speak, getting him out of rough spots while he was still getting the hang of traveling).

But Bill was only making nice because he was after Ford's technology, the ability to accurately predict fate a tantalizing power that would make Bill akin to a god. But Ford simply wouldn't give Bill the cipher to read the data no matter how close they became and Bill eventually dropped the act around two years into their friendship.

Bill took Ford to one of the dimensions that he and his freaks had conquered and tortured him for the information. But he didn't break and Bill didn't really have any leverage to make him crack since Ford's first act in the multiverse was to lock his dimension in a protection bubble (with the unicorn hair spell) to keep those he loved safe just in case something like this were to happen.

Bill gets frustrated after years of silence (outside of screaming during torture) and gets overconfident that, even though Ford won't give Bill what he wants, Ford's broken beyond repair both mentally and emotionally.

On the contrary, Ford was simply biding his time, waiting for Bill to slip up. And Bill does, ten years into Ford's captivity, he leaves Ford's mutilated body on the ground when his freaks drop in for a visit.

Ford heaves himself up, his pain tolerance having steadily climbed until most of the torture was easy to block out. Ford fashions a crude bomb that he had been designing in his head for years using the materials around him, killing Bill and his freaks with the equivalent of a black hole compressed into a tube. Ford barely made it out of the dimension before it was consumed, the Axolotl saving him by pulling him out right as the bomb went off.

The Axolotl wants Ford to continue his journey, because at the end of the road there is also a happy ending for Ford. This translates to Ford thinking he’s simply on borrowed time because he believes that he was meant to sacrifice himself and take Bill with him (the dude is damaged), fully committing himself to his mission to make the multiverse a kinder place for his little brother.

Because of his years of suffering at Bill’s hands, Ford is morally gray/borderline dark. Not toward Stan though, obviously. He had also developed touch aversion, Stan being the sole exception since he subconsciously perceives his brother’s touch as safe. This mindset extends to every variation of Stan, but is eventually reserved for one Stan in particular (the Stan from 77/H).

Ford calls all his counterparts "Stanford" to avoid confusion. Later on in the series, 77/H Stan will be referred to as “Lee”, also to avoid confusion.

[askbillchiper]

I still can't believe he predicted this correctly

https://www.tumblr.com/isosceles-nightmare/759754852275552256/do-you-know-that-theres-a-bill-and-ford-getting

CRAZY.

[caspercryptid]

dear god please do more vampire ford/billford I love what you have so far so fucking much PLEASE

As you wish <3 Here's Part 1 for anyone who missed it. Feel free to drop another request if you want more, as always.

Requests for ficlets still open! ___

Bill feels...conflicted. About Ford Pines having fangs.

First of all, he's jealous. Whole new fleshbag and he didn't even get to custom design it. If he had, he would have given himself twice as many fangs. What good are one set if you don't have the bottom set to match? How are you supposed to get a grip on the neck?

He's stalling, he realizes. He's stalling because he'd fantasized for years about being able to take Ford apart, and now he's looking up at him (up at him! the humiliation! he should be taller!) and for the first time, a treacherous new thought emerges.

He kind of wants Ford to bite him.

Ford looks embarrassed and stops smiling-- Bill feels conflicted about this too, because suddenly he can think more clearly, but also, he wants to keep looking at those chompers. And Ford isn't smiling anymore. That's a bad sign. "mostly," he says, remembering the previous thread of conversation. "you look mostly human."

"Not an inaccurate view of my taxonomy, either," Ford says, relaxing a little, though he still looks embarrassed.

"I can't say I know much about-- taxonomy," Bill says, managing to say that instead of humans. You know all about humans now, Bill. You are one.

Yes siree, totally human. Normal. Normal man.

Nor....man.

He could swing this.

"I'm Norman," he says, confidently.

Ford smiles. "You can call me Ford," He says. "Forgive me, I don't shake hands."

"Perfectly understandable!" Bill says, "I hear lots of creatures can get you that way!"

"Plenty," Ford agrees, leading Bill across the hanger to private ship docking, "Though I have much less to be afraid of, these days."

"Oh?" Bill says, wondering if Ford's been checking on his imprisonment status. That would probably be bad, him figuring it out-- "Because of the vampirism," Ford clarifies, and Bill feels oddly disappointed.

"Right," he says, "I bet you're really spooky!"

Ford snorts. "Ah, yes." He says, "I would say so. Stronger than most things I encounter. I'm very grateful for it, nowadays. I'm a biological researcher, and a lot of the biology I encounter doesn't want to be studied." "I don't know who wouldn't wanna be studied by you!" Bill chirps, and then winces as he processed what he just said.

"--Thank you," Ford says, after a beat, and leads Bill to a beautiful spacecraft, all shining silver and black.

On the underside is painted The Stan o' War III.

You are so fucking predictable, Sixer.

Ford hits a button on his wrist and a ramp lowers and extends. "After you," Ford says, lightly. "enter freely, go safely, and leave some of the happiness you bring." Bill...gets just the slightest bad feeling, at that, but he laughs like he understood the joke and climbs the ramp anyway, into the dark of the shuttle.