#forbidden butthole

[icarus-suraki]

[gojosprettyprincess]

Not proofread

Thinking about Toji following you into the shower claiming that it's to "save water" and that he won't do anything weird but that always ends up with your boobs being pressed up uncomfortably against the cold marble wall while your struggling to stand up on your tippy toes because of the firm grip he has on your hips that’s holding you up. Two of his thick fingers pumping in and out of your tight puckering asshole while the thick, prominent veins in his cock dragged along the spongy area with each roll of his hips inside your sloppy pussy.

“Fuck that’s it doll, taking my cock so well, you’re such a good girl ya know that?” He smirks behind you, running his tongue along his scar as he watched where the two of you were deliciously connected.

You whimpered at his praise, wiggling your ass back into him pathetically, feeling his two fingers scissoring and stretching your forbidden walls as it contracts around him, squeezing soo hard around his thick fingers. You mewled as he gave your ass another hard slap, his relentless thrusts making his fat cockhead brushes against your g-spot as your pussy continues leaking all over his dick. Your mind grows fuzzy at the amount of pleasure you were receiving by having both of your holes filled.

“Fuc-k! O-oh feels s’good inside of me Toji, s’goood” You moaned out, both of your legs wobbling as you felt his cock racing in and out of you. Your brain turning to mush as you covered his cock with messy rings of your cream.

“Yeahh? Seee I told you baby, all ya gotta do is be a good little girl f’me n listen to what daddy says and he’ll make you feel sooo good.” He keened, referring to when you were trying to resist him earlier which led to this, while he was groping and touching you everywhere, seducing you. But either way, Toji will always get his way with you no matter what.

He hisses sharply at how tight your butthole and pussy were clenching around him. To him both of your holes are pretty, tight and delicious so why not stuff both of em? His cock twitches uncontrollably inside of you as your cunt milks him for his own release. He already pulled two orgasms out of you so there’s no way he’s stopping till you’re fed full of this cum. His jaw runs slack as he felt your pussy spasming around him, “Shitt you’re killing me doll—gonna stuff the pretty cunt soo deep and full with my cum, I bet it’ll overflow” he groans, pulling his fingers out of your ass so he can use both hands to grip on your hips to your pound you harder.

You whined as your butthole flutters, missing Toji’s fingers and attention as he picks up his pace inside your cunt. His fingernails dug into both sides of your hips as heavy cum-filled balls continuously slaps against your clit, increasing the intensity of pleasure. He mashes his body closer to you, his chest touching your back as he licks your earlobe gently. You whimpered when you feel his cock throbbing in your pussy, “shitshitshit” he gritted his teeth, “I’m gonna cum, fucking take it all” he moans, wrapping both arms around your torso, smothering his body against yours as his sperm flows into your pussy, filling you up and painting your walls white as he tucks his face into your neck.

His hot breath fanning against your skin as he continues to thrusts shallowly into you. Half of his milky cum escapes out of your snugged cunt, leaking down your legs as he fucks the rest deeper into you.

He finally pulls out of you, his eyes focused on how fast his sperm leaks out of your hole and runs down your thighs. “Fuckk, would you look at that” he snickered, slapping his cock against your soaked wet hole.

“Finish up and meet me in the bedroom” he gives your ass a hard smack before leaving the shower.

[moechies]

riding toji ; what a pain ! 。・゜・(ノД`)・゜・。

finger in butt :o , riding , faux dubcon , anal mention

ever since he asked you to get on top, he was whipped. he doesn’t think there’s anything better than this, pretty tits bouncing up in his face, your twitching cunny fervently around his cock, and your desperate grapples at his arm for help. oh, this is perfect; this is what life is all about.

he especially loves when you give up, your soft body plaint against his bulky, hot one as you hide your flushed face in the cove of his shoulder. you feel his hard stomach under yours, abs and pecs pressing into your skin.

he can’t help but scale his fingers down your figure in your moment of rest, admiring each and every cell that forms your gorgeous shape, gentle fingers pinching the skin of your waist.

he sets his eyes on the mound of your butt, his trailing finger slowly crawling against a forbidden region; your butthole.

you’re dazed and fucked out of your mind, yearning for nothing more but to fall asleep with a click, but the heavy cock that lays within your gummy walls prevents you from doing so. while you’re distracted, you feel a singular ragged finger drag its way along the crevice of your mound, pressing against the puckered, virgin hole above your tainted cunny;

“n—no ! not there toji…” you whine, shaking your head against his shoulder. it’s hard for you to scramble away despite your tried efforts, his lodged cock keeping you still.

you know he would take you however he desired to, despite your little begs of no. nothing you say matters when you’re laying against him without a single ounce of strength remaining in your body, solely waiting for the man to get impatient and end up fucking you to sleep.

his thick finger relentlessly presses into the resisting hole, making you cry out. your nails dig into the sweat-gleaming muscle of the man, causing him to let out a light hiss.

“damn tight, little girl .” he chuckles, bucking his hips up into your cunt, readjusting your position on top. you squeal, pounding your fist against his chest with a complaining mewl. he’s so abrupt. he continues your efforts, a hand laid against your back to keep you pliant against him as he rocks his hips gently against your warmth. a thick finger prodding itself in and out of your butthole, and it’s all too much.

“noooo—“ you cry, humping your ass back into his palm. “hnnn… h—hurts back there.” he laughs at the irony of it all; he knows you’re feeling good, what can he say ? he knows how to make you feel great. he knows it’s all a ploy in able to get him to praise you, praise you for being such a good girl, for taking everything he’s giving you, and it works.

“shh, my sweet girl. takin’ m’finger so well. good, good girl .”

you let out a wanton moan, a mixture of pain and pleasure, just as the chubby tip of his cock pressed against your cervix. his finger pumps a tad faster, a tad deeper and it fills you so wrongfully well.

“y’gonna take my cock in here next time, hm? that’s what the best girls do.”

[fandom-junk-drawer]

The Witcher Headcanon (Modern AU) - Family Dynamics

None of them quite knew what they were expecting when Jaskier invited Geralt and Yennefer to move in to his house in Oxenfurt. Yennefer was lonely in Aretuza, and Geralt and Jaskier needed a more permanent place to stay when Geralt was between jobs or Jaskier had to work on band business.

They were all probably expecting it to be one of those awkward roommate situations where a couple and the third wheel best friend all split the bills and live under the same roof. It ended up being nothing like what they were expecting.

They all secretly expected Jaskier and Yennefer to make it maybe a month before they were at each other's throats and Yennefer decided to leave. It already looked as if they could barely stand each other. They always seemed to be arguing, insulting each other, or being passive agressive.

And then came the subtle smiles, the slight playful tones...

Jaskier and Yennefer had finally bonded. Geralt figured that since they were friends now, things would settle down. But he was wrong. So very wrong. They all got sucked into this new chaotic relationship.

Yennefer always complains about how Geralt and Jaskier are nothing but trouble when they are together. How she can't turn her back on them for five minutes before Geralt loses all higher brain function and somehow allows Jaskier to convince him to do some of the most stupid, and/or annoying things.

Things like:

Building blanket forts and refusing to let Yennefer in unless she knows the Super Secret Password. It's 'Bewbs'.

Tying a bunch of helium balloons to a blow up doll and setting it loose in the backyard to float away, then running inside to monitor the police scanner to see how many 911 calls it recieved.

Buying a tiny fat pony. Not Jaskier's fault this time. They were driving home and Geralt sees the advertisement on the fence and has to stop because all the fluffy babies are out in the field and he sees a little red one, and is just going "Oh my GAWD, I want to take her home! We can put her in the van!"

Geralt just really loves horses, ok? And she fits in the van!

And now they have to say Wee Roach, or Van Roach so no one gets confused as to which Roach they are talking about.

The constant That's What She Said, Everything Can Be A Toy If You're Brave Enough, and I Fell On It jokes. And all the other inappropriate jokes Jaskier is constantly waiting to make.

Yennefer and Geralt have forbidden Jaskier from physically entering any sandwich shop ever again. They never did find out Jaskier's answer to "How do you want your sub topped?" Because Geralt had, thankfully, been close enough to clamp his hand over his mouth in time.

The laughing fits that start over words like "butthole". All it takes is for Jaskier to start laughing, and then Geralt starts laughing, which makes Jaskier laugh even more... Heaven help them if they are in public, or even worse, at a public function and something sets Jaskier off. He will try to get the person who said the trigger word to say it more.

And then they get kicked out.

Yennefer feels like she's babysitting two 6 year olds.

Jaskier convincing Geralt to walk around the grocery store acting like a gorilla

Jaskier convincing Geralt to squeeze into Yennefer's yoga pants, then go for a nice jog around the neighborhood.

Yennefer having to hold their hands at stores/shops/amusement parks so they don't run off and get into trouble. Or get lost.

Blowing their straw papers at each other and Yennefer. (Jaskier always tries to get his straw paper to stick in Yennefer's cleavage. Geralt aims for her hair because he's not that stupid.)

Leaving messes everywhere. Trails of clothes leading to the bathroom. Messes in the kitchen. Crumbs on the couch. Seat left up, or 'sprinkled on' and not wiped off...

Constantly walking in on them doing whatever the hot new tiktok trend was. The Beethoven Challenge had truly been a sight, she had to admit.

Ridiculous games. Like the one where they put kazoos or harmonicas in their mouths and took turns zapping each other on their bare a**es with bug zapper paddles.

Putting random price tags on random items at the store to see if they can make it through the checkout line with it.

Surprisingly, it works the majority of the time. Which is how they ended up with a wet floor sign shaped like a giant banana peel, a big plastic horse from a wine display, and a standee of the store mascot

And trying to rip each other's back pockets off. Geralt had completely ripped the entire a** out Jaskier's jeans. In the middle of the grocery store.

And don't get her started on how she couldn't make a phone call around them. Yennefer lived in constant fear that her phone would ring in their presence. Because that meant trying to talk on the phone while they

Yell random things like:

Is that the brothel again? Was my credit card declined?

That doesn't go in your butt!

Why are you lying to them like that?

Stop hogging the bong!

Yen, help, he's escaped the basement again!

Geralt will do a very realistic impression of a barking dog.

Jaskier will randomly scream.

They will team up and pretend to be two children fighting over something "MoOoooMM! Geralt/Jaskier is...."

"MoOOMMM, I frew up!"

Pretend there is a small crisis going on and run around cursing in the background.

Make random moaning/creaking/slapping/thumping combinations.

Make fart noises.

Bang pots and pans together

Random sex jokes

Deez Nuts jokes

But what Yennefer didn't realize (or refused to acknowledge) was that her and Jaskier were just as bad.

Geralt secretly referred to them as the Chaotic Siblings.

Yennefer tried to be the responsible, mature one of the pair, but always ended up getting sucked in by Jaskier's playful energy. Which always left Geralt feeling like a Tired Dad.

They will fight, argue, and annoy the h*ll out of each other and Geralt for fun.

Some of the things they do are:

The Butt Poke of Death. Geralt can't remember who started it, but Jaskier and Yennefer spent weeks jumping at every opportunity to stab each other in the a**. Then they involved Geralt, and they all ended up walking around the house, constantly on guard, relexively covering their butts.

Embarrassing Yennefer in public. Jaskier starts walking weird, making odd random noises, or just acting embarrassing in public and follows Yen around as she tries to get the h*ll away from him. He just starts walking weirder and weirder. Running just makes it worse. He will chase her, doing the "I'm frEEEE~!" run.

Jaskier and Yen once did the Awkward JCPenny Sibling photoshoot. They wore the cringiest clothes they could find and did all the awkward Sibling poses. They do it every year now and pick the worst one, have it framed, and hang it on the wall in Roach. Last year's photo is moved to the livingroom wall where everyone who walks in the door can see it .

They even get Geralt to sometimes involve himself in their nonsnse. Like the time when Jaskier and Yennefer got bored on rainy day and started doing old kid's crafts they remembered doing from their childhoods. Classics like the Squawking Chicken Cup, plastic mesh canvas crafts, fuse beads, paper mache, etc. Geralt had declined joining them. And then they'd started making Friendship Pins for each other. Geralt had absolutely not been jealous as he'd watched them trade their pins. He'd just been bored, okay? He'd definitley not sat down and started making pins because he was jealous!

The pranks are even worse. Geralt is always an unwitting participant. Like the time they filled his room with balloons. Geralt had started popping balloons just so he could get into his room, and found the one balloon they had filled with glitter. He'd been rather irate about it, but as the Chaotic Siblings had put it as he'd chased them through the house, "At least you look fabulous!"

Not even a week later Geralt had been opening a soda bottle in the kitchen when Jaskier had run up behind him and dropped a mentos in the bottle when Geralt turned to get his glass. They'd run like h*ll after the soda spewed all over Geralt. Yen's phone has the whole thing on video, including the chaotic shaking view of her running from Geralt.

Putting clear tape across the doorways at face height and watching Geralt walk into it.

Switching places when Yennefer is walking with Geralt. The Siblings had gotten a good laugh when Geralt realized that at some point they had switched places and he'd been holding Jaskier's hand for the past 15 minutes.

They bought a big bag of gummy bears, waited until Geralt had gone to bed, then spent a few hours licking each gummy bear and then sticking them to the ceiling of Geralt's van.

F**king with Geralt's collection of horse figurines by either replacing one with a random a** object, or dressing one up, and waiting to see how long it takes him to notice.

Sometimes they just abduct one and hold it hostage until Geralt pays the ridiculous ransom they came up with.

Which is how Geralt ended up walking out of the salon with hidden pastel rainbow hair.

And not to mention all the random, childish things, like

Interacting with random statues they come across, resulting in hilarious photos.

Full sleeve tattoos using assorted kids' temporary tattoos

Both of them constantly yelling "gErALt!" whenever one of them did someting particularly annoying to the other. Like how Yennefer keeps calling Jaskier 'Babygirl' in front of his band. Or telling Geralt that Jaskier is his other wife.

Eskel and Geralt have a private joke that Jaskier is Yennefer's gay boyfriend. Eskel even took all the footage he had collected of Yennefer and Jaskier interacting and put it to Gay Boyfriend by The Hazzards.

Not being able to play a serious game of pool because Jaskier keeps dancing around his pool cue while Yennefer sings "Somebody come get her, she's dancin' like a stripper!"

Or they end up just contantly trying to poke each other with the pool cues.

Or they get drunk, turn the barstools upside down and sit between the legs and have 'barstool rodeos'. The first one to tip over loses.

The a** slapping battles that subsequently end up with bickering, name calling, and sulking.

Which dovetails into their wrestling matches, that always end in high pitched screams for help when Yennefer gets the upper hand.

They call Geralt by going "Pspspspsps!"

Geralt hates it because he turns to look every single time. He hates it even more when they do it in public.

He tried to ignore a public summons once, and had done a pretty decent job of barely twitching, until Yennefer had called loudly, "Geralt Roger Eric-!" And Geralt had never moved faster in his life.

He'd thought they had given up "cat" calling him, until he found out they had changed his ringtone. Now when one them calls him, it's a recording of the specific Sibling going "Pspspspsp!"

They will, every once in a while, even send him a text message that reads "Pspspspsps!"

They found out that a squeaky ball worked just as well. Geralt's in his room and Yen wants to ask him something? Squeaky Ball! Don't know where Geralt is? Just give the ball a squeak!

And if that wasn't bad/annoying enough, the little sh*ts will casually walk up to him, start scratching his cheeks/chin, and just smile as his eyes dilate and he starts purring.

Geralt tries to resist, but as soon as the skritches start, his brain just goes 'Brrrrr! Skritches Good!' and he's gone! He can't even remember what he was doing/saying.

And Geralt is pretty sure the Siblings have used the Chin/Cheek Skritch technique on numerous occasions to get themselves out of trouble.

The Squeaky Ball works just as well. Just give it a squeak and throw it, and Geralt forgets all about being mad!

[voiceshearingyouloud]

Hello!! Lemon, Licorice, and Rhubarb for the ask game :D

Sorry this took me an actual age to get to! Tumblr wasn't notifying me about asks for a while, totally functional website.

Lemon - If you were an insect/bug, what insect would you be?

A bee! I love bees, my grandfather used to keep bees when I was little so we had jars upon jars of homemade honey. I find bees to be super chill; one time I saved one from a classmate of mine who was trying to staple it to a tree. I put my hand out and it crawled on and I walked it all the way to the woods at the side of my school where it flew away. Anyway, I think bees are cool!

Licorice - Would you rather have 5 nipples or 2 buttholes? One butthole is only for poop and the other butthole is only for farts, so you always know which is happening.

First of all thanks for making me have to think about this question. I suppose probably the nipples, just because that feels like the least amount of change from my current body. I don't really feel like having 2 buttholes, and I could probably find some use for the extra nipples lol

Rhubarb - What's the biggest animal you think you could fight? (and win)

Now this is a good question because I am fairly strong and fit because I play a few sports and used to do synchronised swimming competitively. Confounding factor is that I'm a very pacifistic and nonviolent person, at least on an individual level, so I have no practice whatsoever at fighting something and trying to hurt it.

However, in gym class in Grade 9 they brought in some guys in big padded suits so all the girls could practice self defence and fight them off. When it was my turn, I kind of went into a haze trying to get this huge guy off of me such that I don't remember much but my friends say I really went for it. So, probably something like a fox? I would say a more humanoid animal but I think humans are forbidden as an answer to the question and most animals are terrifying lol

Thank you for the ask!! I'll reblog the post and send you an ask now because I had no manners and didn't the first time haha

[traceamountsoftimetravel]

Dune (2021) was 1.) top-notch, from someone who hasn’t read any of the books and 2.) something I sincerely wish I had caught on a large-format screen. Its color palate is so bleak for a movie shot in color, that maybe they should have tried a black and white cut for the hell of it.

That being said, its stirring visuals are its “weakest”point; Dune could not have asked more of its cast or of Villeneuve. Personally, I wasn’t engrossed in the story on a first watch, but everything else makes for a pretty solid viewing experience.

Also, props to the guy on Letterboxd who referred to the infamous sandworm as “The Forbidden Butthole.” Now I can’t take those dry, chapped monsters seriously.

[eraserheadbabydriver]

OPEN the forbidden door

butthole

[gayfirebird]

[ID: Rating of dune from 21/OCT/21 5 stars

"the guy sitting next to us in the theater was definitely making a bootleg and i hope that when people watch it on 123moviea and get to the scene where the sandworm first appears, they hear my boyfriend say "the forbidden butthole""./ End ID]

I—

[trppdnrbbr77]

First of 3... let me know your thoughts.

--The Last Pit Stop--

We were just in the middle of a big move, my girlfriend decided that she didn’t want to move and stay with her family. With everything packed, off I went. We were going to move to get a new start. Work was slow and all we hoped for was a chance. Things are just meant to be, I guess.

A little about me, I am just an average person. I just lost a lot of weight and am looking almost athletic, I lost the weight through exercise, diet, and a lot of swimming, so I shave my whole body except for a goatee and the hair on my head. I don’t have a lot of family; my girlfriend is very close to hers. I was close too but that was before the breakup.

I had been driving all night to my future home when it was time for the pit stop, I never should have made.  I pulled into an old rest stop and streaked to the bathroom.

I was in the stall and had finished my business, I never heard them coming when the lights went out. I tried to scream but all that came out was MMMPHHH as a ball was shoved in my mouth and strapped around the back of my head. I reached out at the direction the ball came from and my arms were pulled behind me, ‘click…click’ my hands were hand cuffed to the back pipe of the toilet.  My clothes were cut and ripped from my body and my shoes were taken off.

I just sat there naked wondering what was going to happen, when my eyes started to adjust to the dark and I could barely see the tall figure standing in front of me wearing a black shiny hood two eyes and red shiny lips, with long ponytail out of the top with hands on her hips. 

Each of my legs were lifted and I could feel smooth jelly spread all over my legs. They must have been wearing rubber gloves because I could feel the cold rubber hands all over my legs. Then long rubber being rolled up my legs like giant condoms they went all the way up to my crotch. 

There must have been others as I was pulled up and forced to stand up. Each leg was lifted one at a time and rubber briefs were pulled up past my knees, but then they stopped, I was bent forward, and I could feel the smooth cool jelly again being spread all over my crotch and butt, then it happened, my butt cheeks were spread apart, and the jelly went into my butthole! I moaned into the ball NOOO, but all that came out was MMMMPPPHHH.

I was slapped across the butt quick and hard. The briefs continued up, and as they went up, I knew what the jelly was for, a long skinny shaft was inserted into the forbidden hole. My “other head” was put into a tight pocket like a giant sort of tube in the briefs. As the briefs were put into place, I could feel the shaft moving further in and my member pulled tightly to my waist. Then I felt a cool rubber hand rub across

my stomach and the briefs. I started to get aroused by this, but my member could not expand because of the tight pocket in the briefs. There were straps that came from the briefs and attached to the top of the long rubber stockings.

I was sat down back on the toilet and long thigh high rubber boots were pulled up each leg and I heard a loud “ZZZZIIIIIPPP” and the tightness around my legs became more severe. My feet were forced into a tip toe position. I was stood up again and the cool jelly was spread all over my upper body, then I could feel large heavy rubber cups placed over each breast each stuck there with a suction sound. I don’t think they were coming off very easily!

Next a tight tube-like dress was pulled up over my new “breasts” and ended right above my stockings, this too felt like rubber as it was tight and cold it pulled in my stomach, shoved my upper legs together and tightened my upper body quite nicely, better than the workouts I had been doing. 

The cups must have been huge as I could feel the weight pulling me forward. My stomach was pushed in as a thick corset was clamped around my midsection, easily bringing me down a couple of waist sizes. Next, I felt a couple of hands firmly grab my right wrist and a pair of hands grabbed my neck in a choking position.  They were releasing my right hand from the cuffs!

I started to struggle but immediately the rubber hands around my neck tightened and I had to stop, or I would have been strangled to death! The famous jelly was rubbed up and down my right arm. A long rubber glove was put on my hand and rolled all the way up my arm to my arm pits. My wrist was pulled behind my back and cuffed to the back of the toilet. Next the gloved hands uncuffed and grabbed my left wrist, and the jelly was applied up and down my left arm. A glove was put over my hand and rolled up to my left armpit. That arm was pulled behind my back and was now cuffed to my right hand behind the toilet forcing my “breasts” to stick out. The clothing was very tight, and I was exhausted just trying to breath.

I heard a buzzing, and my head and facial hair were shaved off. I felt a large collar snap around my neck. The blindfold was removed, bathroom lights were on, I could finally see. There were three of them, all wearing hoods to hide their faces dressed in shiny black rubber. I could feel the ball being pulled out of my mouth, as it came out, I tried to say something, but I got a hard shock from the collar around my neck almost choking me.

One of them stood in front of me with a make-up applicator and she applied thick creamy makeup rubbed all over my face down to my neck right above the shock collar, she powdered my whole face. Then she grabbed my cheeks with her shiny black gloved hand and forced me to pucker up and I could feel thick, slippery red lipstick being applied to my lips, then she painted on the heavy lip gloss. It was very heavy and stuck to my lips like glue forcing my lips to pucker all by themselves, she got a large rubber “O” ring and shoved it in my mouth, then pulled the clear straps of the ring and buckled it tightly around the back of my head.

My force to fight back was zero as I was out of breath from the clothing and the shock of the collar. Like a focused artist she painted on eyebrows and applied thick eye shadow with force, she easily drew on heavy eyeliner and applied long thick curly fake eye lashes. She pulled out an eyelash curler and curled my eyelashes into the fake ones. Dark thick mascara was applied to the eyelashes. She used a big soft brush and applied heavy amounts of rouge to my cheeks.

For a final touch she pulled out a long black wig and it slid onto my head as it seemed like there was a sort of jelly in it. She combed it out and organized it.   She must have put glue on the wig as I could feel it get sticky and tightened to my head. The other two shiny rubber girls came in and cuffed my feet around the bottom of the bowl.

The girls left and I saw my future image for the first time in the mirror over the sink across. A brunette with Betty Paige hair, dark eye makeup, long curly eyelashes, and bright red shiny lips, dressed in shiny red latex was sitting on a toilet with her hands behind her back.

They made it look like I wasn’t even cuffed to the toilet, the cuffs were the same-colored latex as my clothing. As I looked closer at the reflection, I could see the how the red rouge was applied over the clear straps of the “O” ring to make them invisible! I couldn’t even see the ring. It looked like I was making my mouth open all by itself!

There was an enticing red dressed rubber hooker sitting on the toilet, I spread my legs a little and noticed that no manhood could be seen. The rubber briefs formed a smooth midsection and even had a crease to show a small camel toe! The woman pulled a sign from her bag and showed it to me, it read “I am a mute and to make money, I will give the best blow job for 20 bucks”. She put a bucket between my boots and hung the sign on the wall over my head. The stall door was shut. The lights went dim.

I heard the door shut and then the sound of my car driving off! I could hear them talking on the cell phone, “Yes we will be back in the morning to collect the money and move our newest recruit”.

For some reason I was aroused, the bathroom opened. The sound of big heavy boot footsteps, they came closer and closer, then they stopped facing my closed stall. I just sat there quiet as I could be. The door slammed open and there stood a tall muscular man, he looked like a weary trucker, looked up over my head and saw the sign.

I could tell he read it because after he looked at the sign he looked me up and down and just smiled. The last thing I could say is that I hate lip gloss, it makes it easy for skin to slide!

--TrppdnRbbr77--

[dailywords4dailypeople]

Fungible

Fungible describes things, such as currency, goods, and commodities, that can be exchanged for something else of the same kind or value. In broader usage, fungible can also mean “interchangeable,” as well as “readily changeable to adapt to new situations"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

this word has me thinking about stuff that could be money, but it's stuff that is actually stuff. no where in the definition does it mention an act or service.

so paying someone for fixing ur car is no fungible, but paying someone for a thing is, provided that the thing u get in turn is recyclable into the market.

flexible, not individual value. so like a plushie wouldn't work because only a select-group enjoys plushies. the example the Webster definition gives is quite literally a dollar.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

moving on ...

onto things i find more interesting

i wanted to talk about my birthday yesterday... i wrote a whole entry that will possibly be forever stored in the depths of my literary vault. the subject matter developed into non-postable material for a couple reasons....

1 - explicit, "I'll tell you when you're older," content

2 - too good to hand over the rights willy-nilly

tumblr doesn't deserve to own writing that good ~ i'd need to be paid to disclose it.

I've given tumblr enough, drowning material. it's my philosophy; write so much that no one will care to read it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

to cycle back to money, let's talk about venmo

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

just kidding, im not on the train anyone, so i dont wanna write my train thoughts other than saying why we give money as a present now นะ? and why's it gotta be different in different places อ่ะ

my meat-fast is over but i don't wanna jump right back into it and everything. i had a whole slab of fish on my birthday, and i had to push it out my butthole.. i haven't had to TRY to poop in a hot minute and a half. I'm used to having unbelievable amounts of fiber in my diet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ummmmm, guys????? i uh....... how do i.... talk about forbidden knowledge?????!?!!!?!???? what century is this? how forbidden is talkin about the things we do???? what kind of reputation do i gotta maintain????! i am in constant ignorance of my expectations

[gothamite-rambler]

I'd like to add that this is up there but oh my God the ones where the asshole makes you want to scream "How do you not see it!"

Those include:

The mother who harassed a teen girl at the mall under the assumption she stole her father's card (these two people don't know each other btw). She made a big spectacle and I shit you not added "My son is forbidden from using my card so I clearly know she stole it." The girl had to pay with her money because the cashier admitted if someone is accusing her and it turned out to be true the store could be in trouble (pretty much leaning to the fact this girl had her father's permission) and the girl left crying. Everyone in the store glared at the woman and this psycho's husband even said she was the asshole. She even wrote the post in a "guys tell my husband I'm write" type of fashion.

A girl said she was her sister to get out of a speeding ticket. All the sister did after that was admit that wasn't her. This got OP arrested and charged twice but her and her shitty family proceeded to ostracize the girl and acting like she can drop the charges and she's the bad guy because op was the first to go to college... If she's speeding like a lunatic and has been charged before that's her fault! Even her reason for not being on was spiteful and amounted to "My sister ruined my life!"

A guy cheated on a coding exam and I mean cheated. He paid someone to do the assignment in rust when it was C++ and the partner (a woman) did damn near all the work. Then he said he did the work which got her failing grade and the sexist professor refused to change her grade. Oh and he admitted in the comments unintentionally it wasn't a tutor he got and that even if it was those weren't allowed. Like why are you going to a coding class?!

A man and his hopefully ex girl went to a kpop concert. The boyfriend was a jackass and proceeded to shame her for listening to the bad brought up how she's too old to be a fan and mocked her in front of their friends who were equally disgusted by his reaction. He refused to apologize and she didn't bring him another concert... And he didn't know why.

There was one where a father shamed his daughter because her tampon fell out in the pool. Not only that though he proceeded to lock her in the room on the cruise and take away anything fun. Over an accident and yes he's the "just hold you period blood" guys (I hope it was fake though)

One where a mother punished her step daughter on vacation because the kid and her man child husband were competing and instead of this grown woman telling her husband to stop and teaching her daughter to not do dumb competitions, she punished the daughter. Oh and the replied implied she doesn't even like her daughter and sees her spoiled (she had limited custody btw)

A father basically left his daughter stranded on New Year's Eve because she broke some dumb rule. Like he hung up the phone and went to bed! The mother (he was divorced from her) got the girl and called the dude out and said the daughter would stay with her and this goober has the audacity to say that went against the custody agreement... You abandoned her!

A man found out his girlfriend wrote fanfiction and because of that ridiculed her and dismissed the doctorate she earned to the point his own family were calling him out.

Last one, a guy was in a cooking class and decided to bully and shame a woman in the class because she was a beginner. It was a beginner cooking class btw. The way he talked and acted was so smug to the point that the lady could've been revealed to burn the soup she was making but he was a bigger ass.

Oh and a lot of these where they're the asshole end with some variation of "They have a right to be mad... But I think they overreacted." Oh and double points if after the ruling they delete their whole account, get suspended or banned or double down not being the butthole in the comments.

Verdict: Sometimes it's okay to just admit you're an ass if you can't take the opinion of redditors!

This mom sounds so unpleasant to be around idk why her daughter even invited her in the first place

[knownsome]

Is the back of Kenny's gear like... A pyramid that opens at his butthole

Truly the forbidden door

[whatilistenedtoatwork]

From May 29th to June 2nd, 2023

29-05-23

MILES DAVIS “’Round About Midnight”; KRAFTWERK “Trans-Europe Express”; LINDISFARNE “Nicely Out Of Tune”; MORRISSEY “Vauxhall & I”; SINEAD O’CONNOR “I Do Not Want What I Haven’t Got”; ECHOBELLY “On”; JULIAN COPE “World Shut Your Mouth”; THE BEATLES “Live At The BBC”; JULIANA HATFIELD “Beautiful Creature”; DJ SHADOW “The Less You Know The Better”

30-05-23

SUPERTRAMP “Crime Of The Century”; BUTTHOLE SURFERS “Electriclarryland”; SAM FENDER “Hypersonic Missiles”; SOUNDGARDEN “Superunknown”; ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA”A New World Record”; BOARDS OF CANADA “Geogaddi”; MORCHEEBA “Big Calm”; NINA SIMONE “Forbidden Fruit”; FFS “FFS (Deluxe Edition)”; GREEN DAY “American Idiot”; METALLICA “…And Justice For All”; THE SPECIALS “The Specials”

31-05-23

KRAFTWERK “Kraftwerk”; STEREOLAB “Dots And Loops”; SONIC YOUTH “Kill Yr. Idols”; MORRISSEY “You Are The Quarry”; LFO “Frequencies”; OZZY OSBOURNE “Blizzard Of Ozz”; GALLIANO “:4”; WHODINI “Escape”; THE ROBERT CRAY BAND “Too Many Cooks”; METALLICA “Ride The Lightning”; VENOM “Welcome To Hell”

01-06-23

BUZZCOCKS “Love Bites”; LUCINDA WILLIAMS “Happy Woman Blues”; BE-BOP DELUXE “Modern Music”; LAIKA “Sounds Of The Satellites”; JULIANA HATFIELD “Bed”; THE JAMES TAYLOR QUARTET “Mission Impossible”; THE RUTLES “The Rutles”; RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE “Evil Empire”; THROWING MUSES “House Tornado”; TANYA DONNELLY “Lovesongs For Underdogs”; FATBOY SLIM “Better Living Through Chemistry”; LED ZEPPELIN “Houses Of The Holy”; JULIAN COPE “Fried”

02-06-23

SLY & THE FAMILY STONE “Stand!”; ESTELLE “All Of Me”; JULIAN COPE “Skellington”; DJ SHADOW “Private Press”; JAMES BROWN “Black Caesar”; KRAFTWERK “Minimum-Maximum”; JUDAS PRIEST “Killing Machine”; BIG DADDY KANE It’s A Big Daddy Thing”

[icarus-suraki]

My displeasure over the disrespect shown to Saint Alia of the Knife grows.

I have heard exactly zero (0) mentions of Saint Alia of the Knife in the new Dune movie. No Saint Alia, no ticket purchase.

Now, if she turns up in one of the proposed sequels, sure, I’ll reconsider. But for now? No dice.

[anartificialsatellite]

Yugioh fact: they chose Pompompurin for Exodia because of the lesser known 6th Exodia card, Exposed Butthole of the Forbidden One

HOW DID I NOT KNOW

[sonohtigris]

Dune

I just watched the new Dune. I really liked it but I can see why lots of people wouldn't. Also the sandworm does look like a butthole