#for what it’s worth I really do miss watching tv with you

[moss-and-marimos]

sometimes I miss watching tv with you

[re-pave]

Thinking about how people fall in love.

I’ve often wondered how people could dismiss me. I’ve thought about how if someone just “knew” me they would have to fall in love with me. “I’m deep. Look at these sad quotes and listen to this song I just posted. I’m different.” This has proven so many times to be false. Most people don’t care that much. At least initially (and if they are “struck” initially then major milestone already passed. Doesn’t really happen though beyond just a vague interest).

The biggest problem is I don’t make a lot of people feel comfortable when I’m with them (inhibition). I’m guarded. Afraid to drink. Sure I smile a lot but it comes off as nervous (I want to keep smiling, just not nervously). I’m too afraid they don’t like me and too conscious of trying to say the right thing. Too skittish of physical touch. And it has to show.

People can’t fall in love unless their walls come down. If it feels strained it’s doomed. Nothing else matters if that basic element isn’t met. Once it is met, then the other stuff definitely matters. But it’s a big hurdle. Obviously there are going to be people who just don’t like you, but odds are they’re going to be open to connecting if they agree to meet. A strong connection, that includes lost inhibitions overcomes so so much. Nothing else matters without it (and everything grows from it, including good sex). The importance of feeling comfortable together can’t be over-stated when trying to get connect deeply. I think I’ve developed some horrendous habits that are hurting me, most importantly feeling that being “comfortable” with someone, or uninhibited, takes time. I’m starting to realize the feeling NEEDS to start immediately. Sure it can grow. But there needs to be some sort of an uninhibited feeling, or feeling of being able to be fully yourself. At least some walls down. Comfortably being able to physically touch without sexually and not without it being uncomfortable. And it’s interesting how much less your body matters when you’re connected with someone (within reason obv).

I want “my person” to be someone who’s been through it. Someone who’s been into the depths of their minds and soul. And I really don’t know want to settle for less. Someone who really thinks. But first and foremost: establishing a relationship without inhibition. That’s the only way a relationship can find its depth (with friendships too).

Thinking you’re too good for people = you being alone. Be more accepting and interested in “differences” or of things you don’t think are interesting. Good chance they become interesting once you can become uninhibited.

Any conversation (trivial or not) can be unihibited!

Focus on VALUES for romantic compatibility.

The good news is = being better and being uninhibited allows you to build relationships EVERYWHERE. Including the places you actually want to be! It’s a skill that can be taken anywhere. Definitely more motivating to build relationships in a place that inspires me and I can see a future in.

There are going to also be people who it just doesn’t work with. Even with being loose. Try your hardest to make sure it’s not because you were holding back. A million possible reasons, none of them matter. Some people are just simply not a match. Not deep. Nonetheless, I’m currently doing something wrong. It shouldn’t be this hard. It isn’t for most people. I’m not an exception that has “bad luck”.

Balance. Not an overhaul. Things to think about, knowing I’m always going to be me. There’s a never changing core (soul). And I like that. I will always be me.

——————I need to learn how to have fun again——————

It’s ok to fuck a day up!!! It’s ok to have fun!!! Do something a little wild sometimes!!! It adds color and is sometimes very necessary. No more guilt.

Think about it: the people that you want to spend the most time with are the people you can be most yourself with. Uninhibited. Give some to get some.

Thoughts on how it extends to other parts of life:

Anxiety with answering the phone? I’m boring? Don’t have much to say? NOT THAT SERIOUS. A 2 minute call can be just as good as a 50 minute one. No one is going to be disappointed if you lead with love. Express it! Even if it’s exaggerated (within reason). Being excited is good and showing love is good. Focus on that. Natural to think more about how someone made you feel. Doesn’t take much effort. Uninhibited! Back to being young (12?) and caring way less.

TLDR: to feel connected: drink alcohol (etc) or use the mindset to loosen up. It’s not that deep. You need to feel uninhibited to connect with people. You need to feel like you can be your true self. Be light, excited, don’t overthink, be curious (questions, anything goes) and interested.

Most simply : ALL OF THIS IS SIMPLY ABOUT THINKING LESS, NOT MORE.

Cont…Certain people just naturally make you feel more uninhibited when you’re around them. This is probably more about you (they’re uninhibited themselves (drinking etc) or you just care less about what they think). Practice being more uninhibited, regardless of who you’re with. Be uninhibited about everything - trivial and deep. Key: don’t be afraid to talk about or bring up anything. Nothing is embarrassing. Literally pretend to be drunk. Ask stupid questions. Helpful mindset: “I want to know everything about you” Being uninhibited about physical touch is also important and makes everything else more comfortable.

Being fully uninhibited doesn’t have to happen right away, some people are willing to work towards it and others aren’t. Don’t be discouraged by people who just aren’t a match and it’s too difficult to connect. This happens, but you can still be uninhibited with them. Connections that aren’t life-long partners are good too and shouldn’t be a “loss”. There doesn’t have to be an end goal!!! It’s ok to have fun, practice being uninhibited and try to connect!!! No connection is a wasted one. It’s healthy.

None of this applies to texting.

It’s ok to be broken. I will mess up. I might never be able to “fix” myself. And that’s ok. Because I’m capable of love, and that’s all that really matters. If I’m nothing but love, so be it. It will always be there and that’s a big deal. But also, I’m not that unique -no one has everything figured out. My love will reach who it will need to reach. I have an undying faith in that.

I liked the person I used to be when I was (much younger). It’s super comforting knowing I’m still that person and I have the capability to get back to that. How lucky am I! Makes me happy to think about “becoming myself again”. Doesn’t matter how long it takes. Just knowing it’s possible all I need. I’m really excited to feel like myself again.

Ok I’m done.

[violetarks]

hello hello!! congrats on 3k. i love your work so much so you deserve it!! ^_^

if it’s okay could i request luka from alien stage with miscommunication & high school au? ( ´ ▽ ` ) and if it’s okay could the reader be amab? thank you!!

congrats again!!ヽ(；▽；)ノ✨✨💖💖

“but we can’t take back all the words that we said!”

show: alien stage

character: luka

summary: you overhear luka tell his friends that he missed being in ‘the single league’.

warnings: g/n! reader, no pronouns used (i didn’t end up put any gender indications at all, i hope that’s okay!!), miscommunication, high school! au, hurt/comfort, angst/comfort, reader is very self-conscious, established relationship, popstar! luka, he’s nicer in this au LMAO

"are you kidding me?" luka laughs out from inside the classroom.

you recognised that sound from anywhere. it was lunch time and you had told your boyfriend that, as class president, you had to prepare some things for the upcoming school festival during lunch, so you wouldn't be able to eat with him. he was a bit whiney and teasing, but soon let you go. you thought he'd be with some of his friends from his choir class, but no; he was in the classroom with a few of his peers.

you stop before you enter to talk to him for a bit. you were wondering what he was doing here.

"i mean, it's a bit hard, isn't it?" someone says.

"i wouldn't say it's hard," luka sighs out, "it's just a bit of a hassle trying to work around other people."

you're even more curious now. you hold your clipboard to your chest and wait to hear more.

"do you ever miss it? being on your own?" another person asks.

you stop, even halting your breathing in case he would stop talking because you were there.

dating someone as popular as luka was hard, but it was worth it. he was such a handsome guy and had an even sweeter voice. it was hard not to fall for him. you felt lucky enough that he loved you too. he was always on tv or always in the studio, and he brought you along too. you wondered the same thing sometimes; did he miss not being in a relationship?

you weren't a jealous person, but you didn't enjoy luka having a partner in music videos or anything. you had told him such, and he told you that he could fix that. maybe he didn't like the hassle.

"oh, of course," he replies far more quicker than you'd like, "i'd much rather be a single idol. i could do whatever i want, but now… i always gotta’ think of others. such a pain…"

the others around him begin to ask questions about why, but you only stand still. hearing it for yourself only confirms it; luka didn't really want to be with you. it only made his life harder. you somehow always knew that.

he probably didn't want to be rude in fear that you might spread something around to everyone that he was a bad boyfriend and ruin his reputation. or maybe he was just bored.

after all, you weren’t a popstar like him. you were just another student.

“y/n, hey,” mizi and sua turn the corner to see you. the pink-haired girl holds out a pamphlet to you with a smile. “here, this is what we came up with for the concert. is it okay?”

you take it from her and try to ignore the tears threatening to spill. you don't care to stay and listen to more. instead, you turn around and walk away with the girls at your side. you couldn't let him know that you knew, not until you were ready.

after school, luka is waiting at your locker. he is leaning against the wall and scrolling on his phone with his bag on his shoulder. once you're close enough, he tucks his phone away and smiles.

"hey, pretty thing," he greets you as you put your books away, "how was your little presidential duty?"

"it was fine," you retort shortly as you pack up your things, "don't you have a recording today?"

"oh, uh, yeah," he says as he watches your face, "it's later though, i can walk you home."

"it's okay, luka, i need to do some things before i go home anyway," you state as you shut your locker. you look back to him and his pretty face that tilts at you. it takes everything in you to not show that you’re upset. “i’ll see you on monday.”

“hey, wait,” he grasps your wrist as you try to walk passed him. he’s a music sensation, he knows when people are upset and when people are angry with him. you have both of those looks on you. “what about…?”

you two are supposed to go out together on sunday. you had organised something this time — a nice picnic by the lake. the both of you were so excited for it. until now, that is.

“oh, right,” you sigh out. he freezes as you lean closer to him and press a kiss to his cheek. “have fun.”

with that, you slip out of his grasp and leave. luka doesn’t call out. maybe you were just not in the mood, or it slipped your mind and you would come to your senses later.

he texts you when he gets home, when he leaves two hours later for his recording session, and when he gets home. he even sends you photos of his dinner with him and his new band. you only heart the photo and reply dryly. you’ve never acted like this.

you just want to make it easier for him to break up with you. maybe if he realised how little you added to his amazing life then he’d finally agree to let you go.

saturday comes and goes, and finally sunday does too.

sweetheart

sorry, can’t come today, i have some things to organise before the school fest next week

luka stares down at the text with his other hand holding the picnic blanket. he stands outside his door in dismay. at this point, he’s had enough.

love

seriously? whatever.

there, you think, he’s finally done with you.

he's gotten annoyed with this change of pace. you weren't acting like yourself, and he hasn't had any good time to ask you about it properly. you just shrug it off and then leave.

he tries to think about what he did, if he did anything, and nothing comes to mind. maybe he forgot to pick something up for you? or maybe he made you miss an important meeting? he couldn't think of anything.

monday comes around and you’ve prepared yourself. you two haven’t spoken since sunday morning and you’ve found it a bit hard to do so.

luka is upset with you, and you feel unable to be enough for him. so you put your things away, attend homeroom and explain the plans for the festival that runs from wednesday to friday, and head off to help your peers.

“y/n,” a voice calls from the doorway. you glance up from painting something. luka stands there with crossed arms. “can i talk to you for a sec?”

you stand up and and follow him out to the school yard. everyone else is planning their things for the festival, so nobody would be out yet.

“okay, out with it,” he grumbles with furrowed brows, “what’s going on with us? you’ve been totally gone and i have no idea why. did something happen?”

you don’t say anything, despite what you want to say. and that makes luka a bit more upset.

“y/n, seriously. can you just talk to me? i really wanted to see you yesterday and…” he holds his breath as you continue to stare at the floor, “why are you being so distant? you act like you want nothing to do with me! and instead of talking to me, you just—”

“you’re the one who wants nothing to do with me,” you grumble out with a hot face. luka stops. “you and… you just want to be by yourself, you don’t want to be with me anymore, luka.”

“what are you talking about?” he questions, now even more confused.

“i heard you!” you say as you jab a finger into his chest, “you told your friends that you missed being single and—and you didn’t like having me around. so i… i just thought that if i stopped being around you so much, that you would break up with me. at least then it would make sense.”

you have tears pricking your eyes. luka is almost the same, simply by looking at you. he knows what you’re talking about.

“i know it’s impossible, but i sometimes wish you and i were the same,” you mumble out, “it’s hard for the both of us, i guess. i’m sorry.”

he lets out a small sigh to himself before a smile dawns on his lips. he pushes his hair back and tugs you closer, gently.

“c’mere,” he mutters out. you’re reluctant, but seeing him with a sorry smile makes you step forward and wrap your arms around his waist. he holds you around your shoulders and presses a kiss to the side of your head. “oh, you poor thing. that must’ve been holding you down all weekend.”

“luka…” you say against his shoulder as tears stain his blazer.

“i know, baby, i’m sorry,” he shushes you, “i didn’t know you were nearby when i said that, i confused you. i wasn’t talking about you, sweetheart. i was talking about how much i missed being a solo idol.”

you blink and slowly lift your head from him. with slightly puffy eyes and an embarrassed look on your face, you stare at him.

“solo idol?” you repeat.

he chuckles and reaches a hand up to brush away the tears from your cheek.

“yes, i was talking about music,” he states, “not you, my love. i’m sorry that i said it that way, i didn’t intend on making you feel that way. i would’ve never said something like that if i knew it would make you feel like this.”

you can’t even look at him anymore. you cover your face with your hands.

“ah, i’m so sorry, luka,” you mumble into your hands, “i made a big deal out of nothing.”

“it’s okay, i understand, sweet thing,” he replies to you, “you can make it up to me with that picnic date if you feel so inclined.”

you nod your head at him before luka begins pressing chaste kisses to your tear-stained cheeks.

“aw, look at you, my poor baby,” he says to you, “don’t ever think i’d say such a thing. you’re my favourite person in the world, okay? don’t want you thinking otherwise.”

you wipe away your tears and nod your head again with a smile. luka grins as well at your return of personality. he leans forward and finally presses a sweet kiss to your lips.

“now c’mon,” he says after he pulls away from you, “let’s skip the planning stuff and go get something to eat.”

“no, luka," you chuckle out as he tries to drag you away. he forgets that you take your job as class president seriously. "i need to talk to class c's representative about their event."

"ivan's such a bore," he groans, "hang out with me instead."

you have to pull him by his blazer back to his classroom as he sulks behind you. you were glad that things were back to normal, at least.

[007reid]

request for reader having dated spencer (early seasons) and then she finds out what happened w lila </3

hi hi hi!! sorry this took a while hun :( you were vague with your req so i just wrote whatever i wanted to write and because of that i meant for this to be a drabble but it didn't work out that way... enjoy!

secrets. spencer reid

part 1 | part 2

pairing: spencer reid x jealous fem!reader, 1.8k

summary: spencer will never be able to escape the effortless wrath of derek morgan, not even when it's the weekends and breaking bad is playing and you're pulling on his hair.

warnings: no smut you filthy animals, though i did intend there to be smut im just in a fluffy mood rn :// tiny angst if you squint, spencer's blushin a LOT, morgan's evil, bickering and just cutesy couple stuff. me when.

spencer’s secret was the last thing that you were, and you know this.

you and spencer have been dating for three months now, not including the two months talking stage because spencer is deadly afraid of commitment, and between all that time, you’d say you’ve gotten to know spencer pretty well. you know him well enough to trust that he knows what’s best, anyway. it’s been three months, and spencer hasn’t uttered a word about you to his team, his family, and you understand why.

really. you do.

“they’ll never let me live in down,” spencer had whined, one person imminent on his mind. derek fucking morgan. spencer dreads just thinking about it, the teasing, the inappropriate jokes, the winks and the whistles. it’s dehumanizing. “when someone ask me or mention something about it, i will tell them. until then…”

the unspoken reason was there. spencer’s a talker, definitely a talker, but he doesn’t spend much time talking about himself. he never reveals a bit of himself unless he’s directly asked it, and he feels uncomfortable sharing otherwise. the team’s too used to spencer being physically and emotionally repellent to the female race to really ask about stuff like you anymore, and spender’s not too eager to share neither. not out of the blue. it’s unlike him. this you understand. 100%. locked safely in the noggin.

you never think much about it anyway. it doesn’t bother you. what bothers you, though, is secrets.

you know spencer has loads of those, tucked behind that carefree and open-hearted smile and attitude of his. you examine him carefully, searching his face for ticks—okay, maybe you were just looking really creepily because he’s pretty and you try to commit every feature into memory but you are, searching for ticks that is.

you know he hides things. somethings not worth bringing up again because it’ll only bring up bad memories. some other things, however, definitely worth mentioning again. you just have to find the right target questions. sometimes it feels like you’re dating a stranger, with how little you know about spencer’s life. sometimes it feels like you’re dating the love of your life. it’s all very relative.

you and spencer are cuddled up on the couch, breaking bad playing on the tv. it’s one of the shows spencer doesn’t like pointing out the scientific inaccuracies of because he’s too fond of the main character to really say that he’s wrong, and sometimes you miss his voice chiming in between all the movie’s dialogues, but you think the reason why he’s quiet today is because he’s not in the mood to talk. the last case’s gotten him pretty shaken up, and he’s still healing, head in your neck every night and when he pulls away your skin is damp with tears.

“you okay spence?” you say, moving your hand to tangle your fingers in his hair. he hums softly, and then you both suddenly hear the vibration from under your asses. spencer shifts around, digging his phone out from where it’s lodged in a random cushion of the sofa.

he groans inwardly, showing you the screen, not having to explain. in big letters, the caller says: bau--derek morgan.

“he usually never calls me on weekends,” spencer frowns, watching the phone vibrate. “you think i should answer?”

“he’s a friend,” you say, tucking a stray strand of hair under his ear. “answer him.”

“okay,” spencer says hesitantly, then swipes the green button on his screen. he clears his throat as the call connects. “you’re on speaker,” he warns, looking at you anxiously and then back to his phone again. morgan’s a wildcard, and spencer would have to hide his face everyday for the next three weeks in front of you if morgan happens to drop something embarrassing about him just out of pocket. spencer isn’t ready.

“not like there’s anyone with you to hear,” morgan scoffs, and didn’t let spencer answer before continuing. “the team’s planning on a bar night tomorrow—“

“the team?” spencer questions, suspicious. morgan sighs loudly.

“garcia and i,” he corrects reluctantly, “are planning for a team bonding night tomorrow. what do you say?”

“no.” spencer says immediately, looking at you and hope you get his unspoken answer. spencer never goes out on weekends, not unless it’s with you. with his highly demanding schedule at the bau, it’s rare that he has any time off at all, and it’s hard to maintain a healthy relationship that way. any time he gets to spend time with you he’d take.

“come on,” morgan says, enthusiastically. “when was the last time you properly went out, huh?”

“last month, when you and garcia planned another of these team bonding bar nights,” spencer says monotonously. he rolls his eyes. “morgan—“

“don’t be rolling your eyes at me now, genius,” morgan warns. you stifle a laugh, and spencer sends you a wounded look. you forget that they’re basically family, like siblings to knows each other to a tee. “listen, have some fun in your life. who knows, maybe we can find you another lila at the bar.” morgan’s tone is suggestive. and now, that got your full, undivided attention.

and spencer, predictably, looks like a deer caught in the headlights, looking at you in horror was you narrow your eyes at his screen. you prod at his leg, prompting him to answer so morgan can elaborate.

lila?

“i don’t think—“ spencer starts, but got immediately cut off.

“don’t lie and say you didn’t like it, lover boy,” morgan whistles and spencer cringes. “now that we’re talking about lila, actually—“ spencer’s mind is screaming, shut up shut up shut up! as morgan proceeds to feed you more information, completely oblivious to his sins. “do you guys still keep in touch? she looked pretty into you. never knew you had it in you til then, man--”

by now spencer’s beet red head to ears to toe and you can feel the heat radiating off of him, but also off of yourself. you’d say you’re a jealous woman. not too jealous but definitely not not jealous.

“morgan,” spencer starts again, voice a little wobbly and embarrassed and morgan laughs.

“seriously though, do you guys still talk? them eyes never lie,” and morgan sounds so casual, so nonchalant while destroying spencer’s life.

it’s not that spencer doesn’t want you to know about lila. he couldn’t careless if lila waltz into his life right now because he knows they would be nothing more than friends—you’re all he’s ever wanted and he would trade you for nothing. it’s just embarrassing, is all, him being exposed like this, and he feels smaller, feels like he’s actually 5’3 with the glare you’re sending him.

“anyway, that don’t matter,” morgan remains completely ignorant and in his own world and still on speaker. oh morgan. “i want to see you at our bar tomorrow. it’s a yes, right? good. i’ll tell garcia you said yes.”

“morgan!” spencer says quickly. “i have a gir—“

morgan hangs up.

spencer dreads looking at you, so he takes his time getting out the app and then clears all of the background apps on his phone. he doesn’t like seeing you mad and he can basically sense it, the fumes blowing out your ears.

“who’s lila?” you say casually and he looks up. he doesn’t mistake your tone for friendliness, your eyes are narrow and suspicious.

“someone on a case a while ago,” spencer responds honestly. because that’s all there was to lila. it’s not like he’s never had his first kiss before her, so she doesn’t even count as his first kiss (she’s his second) and other than that minute-long moment they shared there was nothing else remarkable. she just happens to the only girl the team knows about who’s spencer been involved with and they are encouraging to help him find another ‘lila.’

it’s all very complicated. and humiliating. he should’ve definitely told you the entire backstory beforehand, because it’s not scandalous or weird or anything. it’s innocent and harmless. but now the problem seems to be blown out of proportion.

“just someone?” you press. spencer hesitates. he hates lying, especially when he’s lying to you. his hesitation gives you all the answer you needed.

“we kissed once,” he says, and gawks at you for approval, for forgiveness. “but that was it. i swear.”

something awful bubbles in your stomach. you know spencer’s not lying, and it’s not worth getting upset with him about because it’s all in the past—it’s not like you go talking about your precious conquests to spencer anyway. but you can’t help the envy and jealousy boiling so hotly it makes you dizzy.

spencer feels obliged to fill you in, to patch up the little bump and to get back the sweet atmosphere that was before morgan called. he knew morgan would somehow manage to ruin his life in some kind of way. he knew it before he even accepted his call.

“she was an actress in this case we were working on and she just, i think, really liked me or something and she was in a pool when i came to see her just to ask some questions and she just pulled me—“

his rant got interrupted by you seizing him to a rough kiss, hands coming up to rest behind the nape of his neck and nails unconsciously digging into his skin. spencer remains mostly unresponsive and soft, surprised and don't know how to respond. you keep prying, teeth digging into the soft of his bottom lip and spencer starts nipping at you back, gentle like he always is.

it frustrates you, how hard it is to be frustrated at spencer. you pull away from him and spencer tilts his head curiously, lip shiny and eyes looking at you like he's never seen you before and he just looks so sweet, so innocent and eager, like a precious pup. you roll your eyes, swatting at his chest, annoyance and jealousy and anger evaporating from you like a cloud.

spencer licks his lips and you collapse back into him again, returning to the position you were before morgan so unmindfully interrupted your weekend. breaking bad continues to play on the tv. long limbs wraps around you and spencer presses a kiss in your hair.

"i'm not going tomorrow," he declares.

"you should," you say nonchalantly. you cuddle up closer to him, turning around until the both of your are facing each other, wiggling your way on top. you begin to trace stars on the exposed skin of his shoulder. "and maybe you should bring someone with you. just to act as a guard for future lila's. maybe you can introduce that person too," you flick your hair behind your back and shrugs at spencer's amused smile. "it's just a thought."

"okay," he says quietly, eyes so soft. "okay. who do you suggest i bring?"

"that's for you to figure out, doctor reid," you say flippantly, turning back to the tv. "now shush."

[epigstolary]

Tough Guy

Tw: Fat shaming, toxic masculinity, gaining as femininity

I can’t believe you still try to act like the big, muscly tough guy you used to be several hundred pounds ago. I mean, come on, who do you think you’re fooling? You’re about as intimidating as a baby elephant. Sure, the deep voice and the sleeve tattoos probably probably made you look pretty tough when you were in shape and 200lbs of muscle; but baby, those days are long gone. There’s a ton of fat packed onto whatever’s left of your physique under there. Those tattoos have gotten stretched and folded over your fat rolls so much that I can barely tell what they are anymore. And I just can’t take the deep voice seriously when it comes out so husky in between the labored wheezing that passes for breathing with you. Nobody’s gonna be shaking in their boots when you’re out of breath just from sitting on the couch, are they?

And even when you do get up, you don’t exactly look like the picture of health and fitness. A slow waddle is your typical pace, all your fat shifting from side to side with each intended step, your body clearly having to fight against it to keep moving forward. And all your indulgence has left you with a wide, bottom-heavy, pear-shaped physique more reminiscent of a well-fed housewife than a strong, buff gymbro. Nobody’s going to be mistaking you for one anyway, though, since your lazy ass can’t help but get red-faced and exhausted after just a couple minutes of walking around. You talk a big game about your glory days and everything you could do if you put some time into conditioning. But let’s face it: you’re about as out of shape as someone can be, and those wide hips and thunder thighs don’t scream athletic or manly.

I know it must be hard for you, though, since that’s still the guy you are in your head. The big, beer-drinking, meat-eating, football-watching manly man. Well, you missed the part where all that beer had a ton of calories, all that meat had a ton of fat, and all that football left your fattening ass planted on the couch all weekend, every weekend. I totally thought you were going to say something eventually about not needing me to bring you so much to drink and so many snacks, but nope, you never seemed to notice that you’d worked yourself up to eating an entire party’s worth of food all on your own between Saturday morning and Sunday night. And it’s not like I was going to stop you, was I?

I’d have thought your bros teasing you about how fat you were getting would be enough for you to at least start thinking about it, too. They may not be the cut jocks they were when you were younger, but aside from a couple with dadbods, they’re all in reasonably good shape. But not you. And you let them pat and rub your belly to put you in your place every time they come over to watch the game, take their jokes about how the blobby flab inflating your arms is all muscle, let them snicker at you for finishing off the food they leave behind to keep to their diets. You think you’re still just one of the boys, when really you’re more like their fat, chubby mascot.

So here you sit, munching on nachos swimming in beef queso, eyes glued to the third match of the day. Love handles bulging over the waistband of your athletic shorts, overtaxed by the titanic rump, bulging hips, and bloated thighs anchoring you to your seat. Tits flopping across your beer belly as you shout at the refs on tv. Chubby, shapeless arms wobbling with your gestures as you criticize guys in peak physical condition, lecturing about how they should be playing when thirty seconds of that level of activity would leave you panting on the ground. And me, just smiling and nodding and agreeing, knowing those 2,500 calories of goo are going to be blowing you up even more by tomorrow.

This can’t last forever, of course. Eventually, you’ll wind up so fat, heavy, and hard to move that you won’t be able to ignore how far you’ve fallen. You’ll have to confront the (at least) quarter-ton body you’ve grown, and consider how blubbery you were when it stopped being manly. Spoiler alert: you passed that point a looooong way back. You’ll face the fact that there’s nothing masculine about a guy whose manhood is buried in several inches of soft, yielding lard. That there’s nothing macho about a guy who has to move fat out of the way so he can reach for the remote or his next meal. That nobody envies a former athlete who’s so bloated and heavy he can barely make it to the mailbox and back. That you’ve eaten yourself out of everything you used to know about yourself.

But don’t worry; I’ll still pretend you’re my manly man, and you’ll eat that up too so you don’t have to pay attention to the last of your fitness slipping away. I’ll tell you that you look so big and strong, while you’re shoveling those pork rinds into your mouth. I’ll giggle that you seem so tough and stoic, while you’re planted on the couch, huge fat rolls flowing in all directions. I’ll whisper that you’re still so fit and athletic, after you come back huffing and puffing from hauling your big back from the next room. I’ll say all the things you want to hear. Just keep eating for me, baby. I want my tough guy to be big, and strong… and big.

[lcriedlastnight]

hihi congrats on 500 followers wohooo!!! i love your writing sm you deserve 500 and many many many more <3

for your special how about either oscar or lando (you decide bb) who always wants his best friend (reader) to come to one of his races and then that ONE time it actually works out he wins and instead of being normal about it the first thing he does is run to his bestie and kiss her ?? romcom vibes iygm <33

have fun with it lovie!! if you don’t want to write it don’t worry it’s just an idea ofc

my baby i love the bones of you! i love love love this idea tysm 💗

reqs are still open cuz my laptop is fixed!!!

1.2k words.

oscar didn’t mind that you had a life outside of him. he honestly didn’t. most best friends did. he himself had a life that didn’t revolve around you so why should he expect you to? his mother had told him that it was the part of him that was in love with you that wanted him to be the centre of attention. at first he was shocked by the very thought of being in love with you. but then when he saw you for the first time after that conversation with his mother, it hit him like a grand piano falling on top of him in the middle of the street.

since his realisation he had begged you to come to a race and cheer him on. it baffled you because for as long as you had known oscar he had never really bothered about you coming to watch him race, it’s not like he came to watch you type up a report at your office. so when he started getting on your case about it, well it made you wonder what exactly had changed.

“please! i am begging you to come with me. just this once.” oscar had pleaded from your couch. it was the summer break and he had decided to stop over at yours for a sleepover, having missed you while being away racing for the past god knows how long.

you rolled your eyes. “why do you keep asking me? you never cared before.” you retorted knowing that this would shut oscar up. it always did.

“i miss you a lot while i’m away. you are my best friend you know. face time doesn’t do it for me anymore.” oscar had pulled your feet to rest on his thighs as some stupid romcom played on your tv in the background.

you don’t know what tugged at your heartstrings this time, maybe it was his honestly and not shutting you out this time. or maybe it was the face that you really did want to watch him in his element. you would’ve killed to watch him win his first race, even under the circumstances.

“fine but you better win to make it worth it.”

this conversation plays in oscar’s mind the entire way to baku. you sat next to him nervously. it wasn’t your first time flying, but it was your first time flying in max verstappen’s private jet with your best friend, his teammate and the current world champion.

oscar’s hand makes its way over to your knee to give a supportive squeeze and both lando and max can tell that there is nothing platonic about the two of you. lando wonders when something will get done about it.

★・・・・・・★

was it too ridiculous for oscar to hope for a only one room, only one bed situation? when he had confided in lando - he laughed in his face. so it was safe to say that it was but that didn’t stop oscar from hoping.

you end up in the room beside oscar, close but not close enough. you were oscar’s guest for the entire weekend, except thursday. that was your day to explore the wonderful city, this was such a long way from home and you were so excited to find some of the city’s most beautiful areas. this was an agreement you had made with oscar about your time here and he had begrudgingly agreed. he would rather with him the whole weekend but you knew how media days worked and if you were honest you could’ve be arsed with the whole hassle of it.

oscar wasn’t too fragile to admit that he did in fact miss you while you were off galavanting. he wanted to be there with you but alas, he had a job to do.

when you eventually did return to the hotel around dinner time, you sat with oscar and showed him everything you had seen that day while he listened intently with the biggest smile on your face. he owed his mum big time.

oscar does great over the practice sessions and you enjoy getting to watch him race around the track, getting a feel for the weekend ahead of him. watching him made you realise how much you actually enjoyed watching f1 as a whole. not even just your boyfriend- i mean your best friend. not that you wanted him to be your boyfriend or anything, that would just be crazy!

on saturday you watch oscar cross the line and qualify second on the grid and it makes you buzz with excitement. you wait for oscar in the mclaren garages to congratulate him. not really knowing where you should be during this time of celebration.

oscar finds you moments after his interview and pictures are taken like it’s his only purpose this weekends. you elect to ignore the raging butterflies the look in his eyes gives you when he finally spots you in the sea of papaya mechanics.

“hi! well done that was amazing! you were so fast!” you say through a giggle as oscar engulfs you in a hug that is worthy of the big screen. oscar mumbles something into your neck and all you can think is that you could definitely get used to this.

★・・・・・・★

the sight of a ferrari and a redbull colliding made your stomach sink. even when you knew both drivers were okay it worried you to no end, knowing that oscar puts himself in the way of that kind of danger multiple times a year and you had no idea just how dangerous it was until now. the chaos made your mind temporarily forget about oscar leading the race.

in what feels like seconds later, oscar crossed the finish line first and like a sheep you follow the mechanics to watch the podium.

what you didn’t know though, was that oscar had only one thing on his mind at the moment. and it wasn’t even getting his second win and proving all the critics wrong when they said that he wasn’t deserving of that win in hungary. he had to see you. his lucky charm. he raced like a god out there and in his love-struck mind he had no one else to thank other than you.

after stopping his car and almost sliding off of it he spots you waiting for him and his mind doesn’t take a second to think about what he’s about to do as he races towards you with what must be the biggest grin you’ve ever seen on him. his flushed cheeks and the pure sparkle of happiness in his eyes makes you light up with joy. he gets to you in record time and you don’t get to tell him well done or even let him know that his mum is a few people away because he is taking your face in his hands and he is planting the sweetest kiss on your lips. he doesn’t ask and even though it doesn’t bother you, you can tell he feels horribly about it when he pulls away and eventually spots his mum. with no time to talk about what happened you just let him run over to her with a grin that matched his.

there was plenty of time to tell him how much you loved him once he got down from the top step of the podium anyway.

neither of you were aware of the cameras on you during that (what should’ve been) private moment so when you show oscar a cute edit of the both of you, where the clip of what your first public ans actual kiss was played first he just pulls you in for another that was probably your fifth hundred.

[lovrsm]

“ꜱʟᴜᴛ!”

sum: Ferraris golden boy moves over to RedBull Racing Team.

Daughter of the CEO of Red Bull, you’ve grown to love racing, and in the way making new friends. Even if you felt like your world was falling apart, even when you denied it, he was the only one you needed. And there was absolutely nothing that could change his mind about your beautiful self, the way he loves you.

word count:idk, prb 2k

pairing: rb!charles leclerc x horner!reader

warnings: name calling, alcohol, smut f! receiving, first time writing real horny shit!

a/n: sorry for the long intro, I swear it’s worth it😔✋ LOOOL, I WROTE THIS LIKE A YEAR AGOO, and I rlly wanted to clear up my drafts but this is too good to not come out. Yet idk if I have any mistakes, if I do let me know!! Also, checo acting as a dad (#IloveCheco)

Spotify - Apple Music

ᴍᴀɪɴ ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ

“and I break down, then he’s pullin’ me in In a world of boys, he’s a gentleman”

Clink, clink, that’s what our champagne glasses sounded like together.

“Congratulations, what a wonderful year. It’s been a pleasure being with all of you.” Sergio, Checo Perez, made a brief goodbye to your team.

He was leaving Red Bull. Everyone here loved him, and loves him, including yourself. He became quickly your family after seeing him every day for more than 3 years.

“We will miss you” your dad palms his back, making Checo break a smile.

“It isn’t the end yet, you know that boss.” He laughed.

His reasons? Family, everything for him, he couldn’t bare leaving them anymore alone, so he decided after, several years, to leave formula 1. After helping Max to win his championships, he is a fucking legend.

“Well, I won’t leave you alone, I will still drag you everywhere, you know? Even after you leave.” Max and Checo have developed a very special bond, even if social media said otherwise.

“We, wont leave you alone, you still owe me those therapy sessions” I winked at him, he became a very big emotional support for me, believe it or not, he’s got some great advice to give.

“Lovely dinner” I took a picture of all of us with my camera, a goodbye dinner for Checo, and tomorrow, all of the world would see this on the newspaper.

-

“I really don’t know what to do, do you know how many drivers have reached us out in the last 2 hours? I mean, I have a few options but they keep giving me more reasons and… I just don’t know.” My dad was stressed, typing in his computer as if his life depended on it.

“It’s going to be alright, okey? You don’t necessarily need to worry about it right now, we still have a championship to win, you know?” I gave him a cup of tea, just so he could relax a bit.

When something is about work, everything else doesn’t matter. At all.

“We’ll watch your options, alright? I can help you with anything you want” I smiled at him.

“When did you became such a great business woman?”

“You’re my father, of course I’m hardworking.”

-

“Red Bull did it again, Max Verstappen and Sergio Perez, world champion and sub-champion!”

Screams from Max and Checo blasted my ears, P1 and P2, again. Absolutely no mistakes. The internet going crazy. And somehow it all became quiet.

“Who will get that Red Bull seat next year? Will he be a fit to Sergio Perez place?”

Everyone went outside to celebrate, while I stayed so I could hear the TV and media.

what do people want?

“Ferrari didn’t have a great year, let’s hope they both get a better car”

“I agree! Great drivers, such a shame Ferrari has been getting worse every year. What a waste of talent.” The other interviewer said.

Charles Leclerc and Carlos Sainz appeared in the screen. Both with an obvious forced smile plastered in their faces.

Charles, my secret crush ever since… forever. Was I obvious? Not a single soul knew, well, except him.

-

Charles Leclerc signed in RedBull that was the only thing appearing on my feed right now . Red bull? Bullshit, you mean? What kind of a big lie is that?

Internet was filled with Charles leaving Ferrari for RedBull.

In what twisted universe does that even happen?

I later learned, I am living in that twisted world, and I discovered the great news in social media, and not my own team.

“What do you mean Charles Leclerc, dad? Why wasn’t I even informed about this. Wait, hold on, when did it even crossed your mind?!” I was dignified.

Following around the kitchen.

“I didn’t have to, oh, I do think I need to tell you this, he’s coming to dinner tonight so wear something nice.”

Wear something nice.

Thanks dad, as always, you’re so, so great.

Night time came sooner than expected, if my dad hosts a dinner, even if there’s a million, or just one person coming over, he likes to be extra.

-

Almost time, 8:00 and it is 7:50, all that was missing was the dress. It was placed on my bed. Showing all of it’s beauty.

Navy blue, our color. It was my dream dress.

Light, silky and fancy dress.

I walked downstairs, watching people running and arranging everything, doing just the final touches.

I’ve come to learn, that people arrive late, or just in time. Never earlier.

“Ah, what a beautiful young woman I have here!” Geri, my father’s wife came to greet me.

“You look amazing, I knew that dress would be perfect for you!”

“Geri, you are amazing, seriously. Thank you, and look at you! We both look gorgeous.” I smiled at her and we linked arms, she and I were walking towards the garden, where would be the dinner.

Some big, round, wooden tables were set in the middle. Each seat would have a name, decorated with a white flower in the middle of the plate.

It was easy to find my place. I was at the biggest one of all, where the most important people of this night would be seated.

Lucky for me, his name was right next to my plate.

In a matter of seconds, people started to arrive, old friends, and new faces passed through those doors.

This will be a great night.

“Funny to find you here, it’s been some time since I last saw you…” I rolled my eyes, I (sadly) recognized that voice anywhere.

“Go away Mike.” I grabbed my wine glass and took a big sip out of it. “C’mon princess, where are your manners?” He got too close to me.

“Hey y/n! Your dad was looking for you, like right now.” Max Verstappen here to save my day.

“Oooh that’s unfortunate, I’m so so so sorry Mike, hope to see you later!” I waved him off and quickly moved towards Max who then friendly linked his arm with mine.

“I owe you one.” I sighed. “You owe me much more than 1, little one.” I laughed at him.

We got close to my father, who now had a microphone at his hand.

“Hello everyone, thank you for coming here and be with us tonight. A toast for Checo here!” He announced and a light was shining on Checo, standing from his seat.

“It has been a wonderful year, sadly it has to end. And I know I’m not the first to tell you that an incredible young talent will be joining us for next season.”

There he was. Navy suit with our logo on him. His hair was messy yet perfectly placed. He showed his dimples and I’m sure I heard someone behind me moan at his sight.

My heart rate was increasing slowly but surely.

“y/n, you’re going to squeeze all my blood from my arm. Stop.” Max whispered in my ear.

Shit. I basically dug my nails into his arm due to my tiny crush.

“Yeah, It’s amazing to know that I’m to race with RedBull next year. I hope we can achieve everything we’ve dreamed of. Looking forward to race with my lifetime partner, Max here.”

Now the light was on Max and me. I discreetly let go of max so that he could have the spotlight. As Max waved I looked back at Charles.

The dimples in his face showed even more, he was looking at me too.

“I can’t wait to work with these wonderful people, and I hope we have a great year to remember, thank you and enjoy this night!” He raised his glass and so did all.

“Well, I hope we don’t have any inchidents” Max laughed at his own joke. Dad joke I must say.

“Well If you don’t push me off the track I think we’ll be just fine” his voice gave me chills. I felt his chest on my back.

I wasn’t strong enough to turn around.

“Oh, shoot, you hear that? I think P is calling me!”

“No, Max-” I tried to stop him.

Around Charles, I barely have control over myself.

“Uh-huh, yeah that’s P, she wants to go to the bathroom, and she needs food, ok have a great night bye!” He rushed to god knows where.

“You really don’t want to be with me, do you?” He whispered on my ear. Feeling the heat of his breath.

“Why wouldn’t I? You are such a lovely company, mr Leclerc.” I gathered the strength and turned around, and his beautiful green eyes shined at me, making me blush.

“Look at you, could you get any more beautiful?”

He lowered so he could whisper again. “I’ve missed you” I looked around real quick, thankfully Max took everyone’s attention on the other side of the place.

“Not here, Charles.” I whimpered.

“Yes here, I can finally be with you, do you think I would waste any more time pretending to not love you? If you do, let me tell you, you are completely wrong.”

He kept whispering, his hands slowly finding his way to my hips. And mine to his collarbone.

“It’s not even 9pm, Leclerc, this party hasn’t even started” I fighted against my own will to drag him upstairs.

“You know I’ll wait, just for you.” He winked at me, before slowly letting me go and walking away.

“You’re not coming, mon coeur?” Charles turned around to look at me. “If you insist.” I happily walked by his side.

We walked and talked for a few minutes before Mike magically appeared before us.

“Oh not even 5 seconds and you are already like a slut with the new driver” He looked at me with a disgusted face.

“Excuse her? Don’t tall to her like that. Do we even know you?” Charles used a very cold tone on him. And Mike started to stumble on his word.

“Uhm, no, she does, like I was something to her-”

“Was, that’s a key word, pal. Don’t you ever talk to her, no, don’t you ever talk to any woman that way do you understand?”

Now, I can defend myself just fine, but that right there soaked my pants in an unexplainable way.

“Get out of our sight, man.” And he crawled away.

“That was hot.” I whispered and he blushed. “Your mother did raise a gentleman.” I smiled at him and he gave me a cheek kiss.

-

Lost on the moonlit pool, drinking my… 11th (?) glass of wine at 1 in the morning while everyone was still dancing, was weird.

My feet swinging as I drink the last drop of my glass.

I went on a side quest myself just to get distracted for a bit. All the noise was going to hurt my ears if I stayed any longer.

“Here you are, you got lost?” He sat down at my side. Didn’t have to look, his thick accent gave him away immediately.

I took a long breath and rested my head on his shoulder . “Yes, Charles, I’m going to get lost in my own house.” I felt him move beside me. He then had his feet in the pool, just as I did.

I smiled to myself.

“Has anyone told you just how beautiful you look today?”

“You have, more than once.”

“I couldn’t let that slip, you do look beautiful with that dress. It suits you just perfectly.”

He paused.

“But I bet you’d look much better without it.”

I nervously chuckled at his comment.

“You haven’t talked to me in ages, you came back being a driver for my father, and now you want to have sex? Why don’t you already make me your wife?!” I dramatically fell into his arms

“Ages? I talked to you last week!” He showed his teeth to me in a smile. “That was a long time ago! Besides, you never told me about you and RedBull.” I sit straight up again.

“I needed your dad to love me one way or another. How else am I going to get him to approve of our marriage?” He joked.

“You are unbelievable Leclerc.” I stood up, and grabbed my high-heels on my hand, walking back to the party barefoot.

I surrounded part of the pool, my dad wanted to add a bar right beside it, and it was freshly cemented.

He quickly copied my moves, but instead, he went on a straight line to me, and in a step he covered his feet in cement, falling down and thankfully placing his hands before getting worse.

“Shit!” I ran back to help him. I stupidly placed my hand in the cement, the other helping Charles to get up.

“Look, we made a masterpiece! Your handprints and mine in wet cement.”

“And your feet.” I laughed

“And my feet… I really need to wash this off before it gets dry.” I grabbed his hand and he followed my lead.

If my dad sees that I’m getting his new driver to my room…

We rushed through the multitude of people on the garden.

“Ooh we’re going to your bedroom, can’t remember what happened last time there…” he whispered shouted as we were running up the stairs.

I jokingly rolled my eyes at him. We were giggling like children. He kept making dirty jokes and as much as I tried to control myself I’d end up giggling much more.

We got there quicker than I thought. With my clean hand I closed the door and he was already in my bathroom washing his hands, and feet with water. I ran to his side and did the same with my left hand.

“I’m done” I announced and got out of the bathroom. Deciding to do a touch up for my makeup, thankfully nothing was much out of place, but my lipstick faded.

I slowly applied it looking in the mirror, and through it I saw a curious Charles looking at me. “Why do you even apply lipstick?” He slowly walked towards me.

I took my sweet time spreading the color on my lips.

“Cause we are going back, party is not over.”

“But we don’t need to.” He grabbed me by the waist and turned me around to look at him and he swiftly placed me on the desk. A smirk plastered on his face, as he slowly got on his knees.

“Charles…”

He got to his knees, not breaking eye contact with me.

“You know that if you say no, I won’t do anything. But I’m not hearing those words, am I?” He lifted my dress planted wet kisses on my inner thighs, getting closer to my sweet spot. “You’re so fucking wet”.

“They will know we’re gone” I nervously whispered. He looked into my eyes and stopped, his hot breath making me squirm. “That isn’t a no.” He stood his ground.

And I’m not saying “do it anyway”, but we both know he is going to.

I didn’t even have a chance to think about the cons, his tongue was already doing its job.My legs were closing due to the pleasure, but his strong arms kept them wide open while he drew circles with his thumbs.

“Charles…” he hummed in response, sending me shivers all the way up. He kept licking my folds and as I looked down, he had his shiny green eyes looking at me. A hint of darkness in them that made me moan just at sight.

His head between my legs was surely what heaven looked like.

I curved my back and my hand gripping his hair so he could get closer. He groaned and sucked even harder.

“Fuck, you’re such a good boy, I missed this.” His hand moved quickly into me, curling his two fingers finding my g spot. “Fuck, Charles!” I screamed his name while cumming all over him, his tongue taking all off of me, as he rose without slowly moving his fingers again. My hips rocking back and forth as he arose, keeping his hand busy. “Too bad that pretty mouth of yours can’t do much right now. I really would love to feel it sucking my dick.” I hummed imagining it and getting even closer to my second climax.

“I'll take care of you, just so my princess can remember who she belongs with.” His lips were on my neck, whispering sweet nothing between kisses and soft biting. My moans filled the whole room along with the sound of his fingers working on her center.

Charles, Charles, Charles…

Each time his name left your mouth his cock got even harder, to the point where it hurt. In a short motion his pants down and without any warning he thrusted into you. You both let out a pornographic scream. If the music wasn’t loud everyone would have heard you two. The sound of your slaps were evident, heat rising, the feeling of his beard in your neck was all too much. Curses along with moans were the only thing louder. He did a final thrust and immediately pulled out, jerking off and finishing in his hand.

“You just washed your hands.” I joked breathlessly, he messed up with my head real bad. “Couldn’t resist” he smiled, gave me a peck and disappeared into the bathroom. I melted on that spot.

“Come on mon coeur.” What I loved about Charles was that he always cared. we got into the bathroom and I washed my hands, in the reflection of the mirror his eyes were already in mine.

“What?” I asked as the blood rushed into my cheeks. “Nothing.” He gently smiled, and his eyes shined to me in a different shade of green.

-

Taglist

@delicatepeanutsublime @ironspdy @architect-2015 @buendiabebeta @dreamergirlatpaddock @lercvlie

[kyunzin]

𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐚 𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞

character; 𝐒. 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐞

cw; he just cant get enough of your sweet cunt (f!reader)

tags; nsfw, black reader, oral(f!receiving), cum eating, squirting, overstimulation, pussydrunk!connie

a/n; I love him, sorry for any typos

it doesn’t matter what you’re doing he will find a way to be between your legs, he’s not stopping until he’s satisfied and your cunt is slick with his saliva mixed with your juices.

✰ at your desk while you’re doing work

he comes up behind your desk chair one arm around your neck his hand turning your face to pull you into a quick kiss. you’ve been here trying to finish your assignment for a couple hours now and are almost finished, you hoped he would let you go without disturbing you until you’re finished but clearly he gave up being away from you.

“how long till you finish ma, I miss you”

you press a small kiss to his jaw before turning back to your work, not wanting to break your focus “I’m almost done baby, just wait a bit longer for me” theres no telling if that will be enough to deter him but you try anyway believing that he will see that you don’t have much left before your attention is back on him. unfortunately for you he used up all of his patience and isn’t willing to let you finish peacefully.

“come on mami, you been here for ages doin this, you cant take a break now?”

you try to stay focused writing more words down in the document when his hands start to roam your chest through the loose tank your wearing and it’s weakening your resolve “no papi, I have to finish this now otherwise I’ll miss the deadline” his hands massage your shoulders letting out a defeated sigh, leaning down to kiss the side of your neck. he’s doing all fifty tricks to try and get you away from your work and if it continues any longer it might just work.

“take a little break for me princess, I’ll make it worth your while”

his musky scent as well as his sultry voice have you at your breaking point and you let out a defeated sigh and he knows that he’s won you over. you push forwards you work and lean back in the chair moving away from you desk, turning around to see him standing there with a familiar grin on his face and you know your not going to get your work finished tonight, the smile on his face tell you that he knows as well. “remember you said a break, I don’t wanna spend to long away from this baby. be quick please” without a word he sinks to his knees in front of you easing you out of your shorts and panties. he wastes no time bringing you to the edge of the chair and swinging your legs over his shoulders and settling his head between your thighs.

✰ while you’re watching a movie, he finds something else bide his time

the two of you are laid on the sofa, you laying under him with his head resting on your chest and his arms around your chest. your legs are loosely wrapped around his torso while the both of you comfortably watch as the tv play an old movie that the both of you have watched before. he only let you watch because he loves to hear you laugh at the same bits every time. it’s not until you feel him unwrap himself and start moving down your body that you let out a quizzical hum.

“don’t worry about me ma, just watch your show”

it doesn’t quell your curiosity however all questions are answered when he stops above your thighs and pulls off both your sleep shorts and your lace panties at the same time dropping to the floor next to you. “really babe, we just fucked and you’re still horny” in return he places a few kisses to the inside of your thighs while looking up you with a conniving grin. in due time the movie is forgotten by the both of you as your attention is focused on trying to push his head away from his onslaught on you pussy. it’s not the first time he’s gotten bored of watching a show and chosen to eat you out instead, it definitely won’t be the last time either.

✰ before he fucks you

it’s like a ritual for him. there no time that the two of you fuck that doesn’t start with him lapping and sucking on your cunt. most of the time he does it for you but sometimes it’s for his pleasure. he can sit there for minutes and hours with his tongue thrusting in and out of your pussy. obscene sounds bouncing in the room as he licks up all the leaked juices from your pussy only for him to fuck them back into you with his tongue. he especially loves it when your thighs lock around his head keeping him place while he happily sucks on your clit locked in place like a child sucking on a lollipop. his tongue curling inside of you, the vibrations of his moans adding to the pleasure. the feel of your new nails running through his freshly trimmed hair as you push his face further into your pussy only spurs him on more. it’s only a matter of time before he feels the familiar sensation of your pussy quivering around his tongue before you cum into his mouth. he makes you cum at least twice like that before he actually fucks you.

✰ after he fucks you

it should be no surprise that he eats you out after he fucks you full of his cum. it’s also a part of his ritual. however instead of having you on your back he makes you ride his face grinding your sensitive cunt and nub on his face. tongue stuck out as he catches all the cum that drips out your sopping pussy. at first you worry about crushing him under you but after some reassurance from him you lower yourself on his face though still letting up some of your weight. however he’s not satisfied with that and pulls you down on him completely, holding you down by your thighs sucking out the cum from you. even as you try to lift up overstimulated by all the pleasure he holds you down firmly not letting you run away from his mouth. the stimulation of both your clit rubbing against his nose and his tongue ravishing your cunt has you cumming for the nth time that night, squirting all your juices into his mouth as he tries his best to suck it all up. only then is he satisfied and goes to run a bath for you while you lay there limp and fucked out.

𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

[kremlin]

@wikwalker hi sure yes anything to give me an excuse to procrastinate the post i should be writing right now. here are all teh drugs and how to manage them. you can trust me, a drug addict

first of all: https://www.erowid.org/ , erowid always

don't be afraid of drugs, if they're the right drugs, you should do them since they will be a blast regardless and overcoming fear is also good (but outside the scope here)

OK to do as much as you want: alcohol - social benefit greatly outweighs health effects, no reason to avoid if predisposed to abuse since that'll happen sooner or later. what can i say? don't be a fucking dork. when you start drinking, really overdo it as much as possible without dying and get a few real nasty hangovers under your belt so you know how much is the right amount to drink.

weed - innocuous enough to be fine but will make you stupid in the long term. make sure to only buy from a real drug dealer and never some legal institution. cut it out when you're a "real adult". don't smoke weed and watch TV routinely, go out and do things so you naturally grow to hate it. good to go through this as early as possible to minimize the time you spend as a cringe weed enthusiast

i guess those are the only two.

ok to do infrequently (annually): "lsd" - or whatever it is, probably not lsd, blah blah blah, if it works and is sold on blotter its fine and won't make you go nuts or whatever. opt for a better psychadelic imo. see psych rule at bottom of section

mushrooms - better than acid since you know what they are. rule of thumb is to always do more than you think you want. minimum 1/8oz. see psych rule at bottom of post

dmt - if you somehow have a dmt hookup you don't need to be reading any of this. lasts 10 minutes which leads to tendency to way overdo it, don't do this, my favorite webcomic artist is permanently crazy from exactly that. using a crack pipe is also not the uhhhh most dignifying-feeling thing to do either. it's harder than you think.

mdma - for use at electronic music event or rave. overuse causes brain lesions or something.

coke - wait until you're in your 20s, have maxed out your roth IRA for a couple of years in a row, and havent missed a car payment in a similar timeframe. better still if you've worked a very shitty low paying job and know the value of a dollar. if you still find yourself buying candy you're not ready. too expensive to be worth it to get hooked on. know that you are VERY ANNOYING to anyone who also isn't high. don't fuck around with the guy selling it to you. avoid discussing or thinking about business ideas. you can't afford to make it a habit + kinda turns you into a piece of shit after a while, but at least a very interesting one

ketamine - another sick drug that rules, but save it for a special occasion. don't try and go into the k-hole your first time

rule for psychedelics - you get one good strong trip a year and that's it, make it count, always opt for doing a bit more than a bit less. but don't make it a habit, otherwise you turn into a very stupid very annoying "hippy" style cliché and believe in ghosts, aliens, crap like that.

ok to try once prescription opiates/benzodiazepine (xanax), valium, this kind of shit - worth trying so you can go "holy shit, this stuff is way way way too good to ever use responsibly" and then never do again. especially if you're white. for some reason we just can't handle this shit. if a doctor prescribes it to you, idk, that's your call to make.

ayhuasca - this is just dmt in a different form. do some other psychadelics a number of times before you do this. once you realize the whole "substantial visual hallucinations" thing is made up, its time. do exactly this: -buy root online (legal). receive box of dirt -boil dirt into "tea" (read erowid for exact recipe) -take over-the-counter anti nausea medicine or anything that will give you a stronger stomach -drink tea (its nasty as fuck, get it down quick) -have someone bigger than you keep an eye on you for the next five hours. -have the experience, which is absurdly intense, has no bearing to the real world, etc etc. don't be a bitch and throw up, if you do it'll only last an hour or so. again there is no way to provide a consistent description of the experience except that you will meet god. you only ever need to do this once and never again. trust me

peyote/salvia/etc - try em if you want, you'll never ever want to again afterwords. these are drugs for idiot teenagers too lame to get real drugs. imagine being very very sick from poison and utterly terrified at the same time. No good

whippets/nitrous oxide - just find a dentist that uses it and don't bother creating hundreds of pounds of trash on your floor for this crap that lasts ten seconds. you have to understand the extremely short timeframe coupled with the cost makes zero sense. go to a phish concert parking lot and do some people watching -- you do not want to be these people. only use is as a motivator to get routine dental exam. also if you somehow manage to make it a heavy habit your fucking legs stop working, no shit, but they start working again once you quit.

don't ever do heroin/meth/pcp - is is truly a mystery why you should never do these 🙄

synthetic weed/k2/shit from the gas station - it is so funny that they sell this as "weed that won't pop you on a drug test". its not weed. it is some dubious chemical sprayed on yard waste. smoke it to have a terrible time and go nuts. only buy drugs from legitimate drug dealers!

kratom - anyone's guess as to why this is legal but it's heroin for pussies. its still heroin

dxm/cough syrup - do you ever wonder why it is exclusively teenagers robotripping? it's because it sucks ass. is like a cheesegrater on your brain in terms of health effects with repeated usage. you're better than this king

inhalants - these are at the bottom of the list for a reason. do not huff gas. don't huff paint. do not consume computer duster. not fun + fastest way to make yourself a complete, uh, (word i can't say anymore) and then dead

not listed quaaludes- unavailable due to no longer being manufactured. these ruled apparantly

sincis2c - unavailable due to not existing, i just made this up

amphetamines - cannot provide objective take here. they're my albatross, lifelong (posted 4:55am natch)

[bahrtofane]

in which jude is your best friend, or well, was. hes much more now

word count - 1.3K

watch it - arguments, yelling. happy ending tho hehe

------

“Can you grab my purse? I left it in the back seat." 

Jude looks up from his phone at the doorway and gives you a nod, “Yeah gimme a sec, i got it.”

You send him a smile and thanks before taking your shoes off and relaxing on his couch. Today was an impromptu hang out, practice ended early and the personal trainer was out, so this was one of the few days Jude had to relax.

He still wanted to spend it with you, even after you told him he should use the opportunity to nap or just relax in his room. 

'What's the point if I can't bother you at the same time ?' was all he said. 

so you caved and got ready for him to pick you up, soon to raid his fridge or find another movie to watch. (which you always end up talking over but that's okay. It's the thought that counts. you even have your own Netflix profile on his tv !)

Your phone goes off and you're pleasantly surprised to find it's the man you met a few days ago. You caught his eye and he politely approached you while you were on a little coffee run. a treat after a bad few days. 

You smile when you text your date back confirmation. Dinner date this Saturday how exciting !

Jude comes back with your purse in hand, sliding it on the table your way before crashing into your side. 

"Jesus Jude- my god- you're too big to be doing that. you're gonna kill me someday." you sputter.

"no, it's good to keep you on your toes." he giggles while smothering himself into your side

you groan trying to get him off before resorting to kicking him off with your legs. 

he yells before hitting the ground, "Im worth too much for you to be throwing me around what the hell."

"you started it! you're so annoying, oh my god."

he narrows his eyes before getting up and sitting a far distance away from you, for safety. 

he puts on a movie and continues to sulk while you roll your eyes. 

‘Oh by the way I'm gonna have to cancel saturday. “ 

“What, why ? What happened?“ 

“I have a dinner date that day ! isn't that exciting.’

Jude only scowls at you, unimpressed. “You're canceling, over a man. First of all, why is this the first time I'm hearing about this guy. And why didn't you tell him you were busy and just pick a different day.”

“Saturday is his only day off. I don't know why you're so mad.” You frown. 

“Saturday afternoon is my only afternoon off.”

“Jude. Why are you being so childish?”

“I don't know because you're putting some guy you just met before me, your best friend.”

“He's not just some guy I think we could really be something. Why do you have to be so protective of me? I'm not 5 oh my god.”

“It's not just that it's that you're canceling our hangout for him.”

“We always hang out-”

“Exactly so I don't know why you're jumping so quickly to change it over some dick.”

“Im not like that and you fucking know it. You of all people should know that this is a chance I don't want to miss out on just because we order food and stare at a tv for hours on saturdays.”

“Oh so that's all it is to you. Staring at a tv.’ Jude rolls his eyes.

“It's not like that, I love hanging out with you. "

" I just don't understand why you're suddenly so eager to see anyone right now . I can't make any plans with anyone without you storming down here and telling me it's a waste of time. " He sighs 

You stare at him in disbelief. “Because you have a career ?? i don't give two shits who you talk to, but I can't let you make dumb decisions. I will always be your best friend, that's my job and nothing more."

"That's why this is so frustrating,” He waves his hands in the air aimlessly, “Do you even know what you're saying to me?"

"You're not making sense." You shake your head. 

 “I don't want to fight with you, I just don't understand why you're acting so selfish.”

“That's your problem, you act like I'm doing something wrong instead of being happy for me."

“You dont fucking get it do you oh my god I dont know how to be any more clear with you so you can get It.”

You don't say anything, choosing not to read any deeper into his words and instead watch the rest of the movie in silence. You don't have it in you to argue with him anymore. You care for him, truly. He's your best friend and you couldn't be happier or more proud to be able to have him by your side. 

But there's always that prickle of feeling that lays within you. A prickle of yearning, a wanting for more. You're not blind by any means, Jude is a handsome man and he's grown into his features better than you expected. 

You don't know if it's just delusion, but there's always a base layer of tension between you too. Always a second away from something going too far and it leading where it probably shouldn't. 

But you know it's deeper than a what if for you. You've found a good friend in him and somewhere along the way you've drifted to less than only platonic feelings. But you also know the way Jude is, the way he acts and talks is just that. Not meant to be read deeper and you dont let anything get your hopes up anymore. 

It's the reason why you said yes to that guy in the first place, so you can hopefully stop crushing on your best friend and move on.

Your over-thinking soon passes the time and you find yourself in an awkward quiet that neither of you want to break in fear of more arguing. But Jude takes the risk.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles.

"For what Jude? "

"For how I acted, and what I said. It was an asshole move to assume you're only gonna meet him for dick when I know you aren't like that. And for acting like you can only hang out with me. I'm sorry.”

You sit there silently, not saying a word. 

He turns to face you almost desperately, “You're my best friend you really are. I care about you, more than anyone else. And i just- fuck it. You’ve given me some of the most precious moments of my life, but I think I’d be a better boyfriend if you’d let me, friends just doesn’t do justice to what I feel for you anymore.”

You stand up and walk over to him, standing between his legs and placing his hands in yours, gently smiling.

“Please say something.” He whispers. 

“I can't think of anything I want more than for you to be mine Jude.”

He jumps at that, bringing you flush to his chest, “What about the guy on saturday?’ “I'm obviously going to cancel and tell him I'm no longer available.”

“Good.” He smiles. There is a moment where his gaze focuses on your lips and you can feel your face blush at the newfound attention.

“Can I, kiss you ?” He breathes

You give a nod, and no sooner do his hands gently cup your face, his lips meeting yours.

[esggs]

tired manager!Nanami x kpop idol!reader

He’s sick, absolutely sick of you. In all his underpaid overworked years as an idol manager, he’s never seen one as impossible as you. 

You’re the centre, lead singer, and the most popular member of your girl group ‘R0ck-Chic’. The princess of K-Pop. Ranked Top10 on Billboard and Melon, brand ambassador for Chanel. Photocards for $1500 retail. Face straight out of a manhwa, bubblegum-sweetheart personality, born a musical genius too!

But that’s just on camera.  

“Prissy bitch.”

Nanami keeps his thoughts to himself. He’s doubling as a bodyguard-cum-manager for your M-Net Music Show, watching you yell at your hairstylist backstage. She accidentally burned a piece of your hair extensions off, but hey, it was a fucking accident! The poor lady is nearly in tears at your cruel words. No one really likes working with you, not your staff, not the other members of your group, because underneath the Estée Lauder Double Wear foundation is a secret none of your massive fanbase knows: You’re a cunt. 

“Nanami-san!” At least you’re still calling him with honorifics, even though he’s cringing thinking about what harsh command your majesty shall bark at him. “God, Nanami-san, where the fuck are you? When’s our show going to begin? Can’t get on stage in time, can’t get my makeup done on time-” You cast an evil look at the makeup-artist, who promptly bursts into tears too. “- I’m surrounded by useless trashcans!”

Miwa, the leader of R0ck-Chic, hesitantly tries to calm you down. “Ah, yn, it’s ok, they’re setting up the stage right now so–”

“– I believe it’s prudent to look at the other groups’ rehearsals and analyse the competition, miss.” Nanami steps in. He really hates his job, having to babysit the most spoilt celeb on the planet. When he speaks, he means it to everyone around you. “Let’s all use this time to the fullest, yes?” 

(Later on he’d go and apologise to the people you brought to tears. Not that he’s under any obligation to do so, he’s simply a gentleman like that. And maybe he cares about your reputation.)

You grumble, taking the ice-chips that Nanami offers you. It’s hard to be angry with diet-abiding ice-chips in your mouth. “Don’t need to ‘analyse’ any stupid competition. R0ck-Chic has me, and I’m the best.” 

The fucking audacity, Nanami cringes. And she’s not even wrong. That’s the worst part. 

You kill it on stage that night. Broadcasted live, the TV ratings spike immediately when you come on screen, bootleg solo fancams flooding Twitter and your ending fairy goes viral. The photocard prices jump up to $2000. 

There’ll be stalkers tonight following the car. I’ll have to drive through the offside path. Nanami took all the security measures that any manager worth their salt would.

Only he didn’t account for how crazy your stalkers would get tonight in particular. Even the offside has large unmarked SUVs, waiting to trail your car to a standstill. Sasaengs.

You’re in your sweatpants, performance makeup off, texting away inside the car that Nanami is driving right now, clearly no idea of how much danger you’re in. A fan would simply take your autograph and leave happily. Sasaengs, especially ones of this calibre, would stab you. At least she’s not screaming. Yet. 

He’s very correct. Because the moment that he tells you that you’ll have to stay in the dance studio tonight (can’t risk leaking the group dorm location to the stalkers), screaming is exactly what you do. 

“You promised I’d go home!” You stamp your feet on the ground, chuck your phone at him, throwing a proper fit. “I’m sick of you stupid fuckers ruining everything! Everyone is dogshit here!” The regular migraine that comes after dinner-time drives nails into Nanani’s temple. “Nanami-san, you dumb fucking gasbag! I’m tired! I-WANT-TO-GO-HOME!”

“SO-DO-I!”

Both you and Nanami are shocked silent. No one has ever talked back to you since you became famous, and you became famous at the age of 5. It’s weird. It’s interesting. 

Poor Nanami-san now has to deal with all the drama you cause as well as this new problem: you might be growing a teeny weeny crush on him.  

Bonus: you have to buy a new phone. stop throwing phones. 

masterlist

a/n: I have insomnia and a bad cold. no one has suffered like me.

[nayziiz]

One Night in Miami | LN4

Summary: An eventful night with a close friend turns Lando’s world upside down when he’s forced to confront his true feelings about her. As they return to normal, he cannot seem to forget their time together and neither can she. Will they find each other once again?

Pairing: Lando Norris x OC (Renn)

Warnings: Smut, a lot of angst, fluff

Masterlist

Chapter 3 - Spain 2023

Renn wanted to be there for Lando at the Spanish Grand Prix, but work had her tethered to London, shooting content for one of her clients. The life of a photographer meant travelling everywhere, capturing moments that mattered to others while often missing the ones that mattered most to her. She had hoped, desperately, that she wouldn’t need to work that week, but reality had its own plans.

As she watched snippets of the race while tidying her apartment, her heart sank. The familiar buzz of the TV in the background did little to distract her from the disappointment that loomed large. Another tough race for Lando, ending in a disheartening P17, with his rookie teammate finishing ahead of him. She knew all too well how hard he would take it, blaming himself when the issues ran far deeper than his driving. She sighed, her heart aching for him. She knew how much he poured into every race, how hard he worked to push through the challenges. And now, miles away, all she could do was watch and hope he knew she was thinking of him.

It was like clockwork; first a text from Lando with the upside-down smile emoji, and an hour later, her phone rang. Renn answered immediately, her heart already aching for him.

“I suppose it would be stupid to ask you if you’re okay?” she spoke into her phone, collapsing onto her couch.

“Not stupid when the assumption is correct,” he replied, his voice carrying the weight of his disappointment as he took a seat in his driver’s room. “Can’t I just have one decent race?”

“Lan, you had a great start. That contact with Hamilton was unfortunate, but you finished the race, you didn’t retire or give up,” Renn tried to reassure him, her voice gentle but firm.

“Sometimes I wonder if it’s worth it, you know. Like, am I going to be happy being P17 for the rest of my career if it keeps going like this?” Lando continued, his tone hopeless and devastated.

“You’re getting upgrades soon, though, right? What if those skyrocket your year altogether? Have you thought of that?” she countered, trying to inject some hope into the conversation.

“I can’t be optimistic when things have been this bad for so long,” he argued, frustration clear in his voice.

“Rather optimistic than on the edge of giving up everything you and your family have worked so hard for,” she retorted. He remained quiet for a moment, absorbing her words. “You’re Lando fucking Norris and you’re on the verge of greatness.”

“I really wish you were here,” he spoke softly, the vulnerability in his voice tugging at her heartstrings.

“Me too, so I can slap some sense into that head of yours,” she added, causing him to smile for the first time since he finished the race. “But, I do wish I was there with you.”

“Will you come to Montreal?” he wondered, his voice hopeful.

“If I don’t have work, then yeah, I’ll be there,” she responded, her own voice softening.

“Good. I’m heading to MTC sometime this week if you want to go have dinner or something while I’m in the UK?” Lando asked, the tentative hope in his question making her smile.

“Like a date?” she hesitantly asked, the words slipping out before she could stop them.

“Not a date, just two friends getting something to eat together,” he clarified, although he wished it was a date.

“Fine, we can grab dinner,” she agreed, trying to keep her tone casual.

“I have to go debrief with the team. Can I call you later so you can tell me about how your shoot went?” he asked, his voice warmer now.

“Yeah,” she answered, a small smile playing on her lips.

“Talk to you later, Rennie,” Lando said, the gratitude in his voice unmistakable.

“Talk to you later, Lan,” she replied, her heart a little lighter after their conversation.

As she hung up, Renn leaned back on her couch, staring at the ceiling. She hated hearing him so down, but she was glad she could be there for him, even from afar. The thought of seeing him soon, of sharing a meal and catching up in person, brought a flicker of excitement to her heart. For now, she would hold onto that, hoping it would be enough to carry them both through the tough times.

The night for the dinner date that wasn’t a date finally arrived. Renn had spent the day trying to focus on her work, but her mind kept drifting back to Lando. She wondered what they would talk about and how the evening would unfold. Despite her efforts to keep things casual, there was an undeniable flutter of excitement in her chest.

Lando, too, was distracted throughout the day, thinking about the evening ahead. He had made the reservations at one of their favourite restaurants, a cosy little place known for its relaxed atmosphere and excellent food. As the time drew nearer, he found himself nervously adjusting his outfit, wanting to strike the perfect balance between casual and put-together.

When he pulled up outside Renn’s home, he felt a mix of anticipation and nerves. He texted her to let her know he had arrived, and a moment later, she stepped out of her apartment. She looked effortlessly beautiful, her casual dress and light makeup highlighting her natural charm. His breath caught for a moment, but he quickly masked it with a smile.

“You look stunning, as always,” he said as she approached the car.

“You clean up pretty well yourself,” she replied with a grin.

They made their way to the restaurant, the conversation light and easy, filled with the familiar banter that marked their friendship. When they arrived, Lando led the way inside, where they were promptly shown to their table. The ambiance was perfect - dim lighting, soft music, and an intimate setting that made it easy to forget the world outside. They settled into their seats, and after ordering their drinks, Lando leaned back, looking at Renn with a soft smile.

“So, how’s the shoot going?” he asked, genuinely curious.

“It’s been good, actually. Busy, but I managed to get some great shots. I think the client will be happy,” she replied, her eyes lighting up as she talked about her work.

“I’d love to see some of them sometime,” Lando said, his interest sincere. “You’re such a talented photographer, might just learn a thing or two from you.”

“Sure, I’d love to show you,” she agreed, feeling a warm glow from his attention.

Their food arrived, and as they ate, the conversation flowed effortlessly. They talked about everything from their favourite movies to childhood memories, and of course, racing. Lando shared some behind-the-scenes stories from the paddock, making Renn laugh with his vivid descriptions and animated gestures. While the evening progressed, the line between friendship and something more began to blur. The glances they exchanged were longer, the touches more lingering. By the time dessert arrived, they were both feeling the undeniable and familiar pull between them.

Returning to her apartment, Renn and Lando fell into an easy rhythm. Renn moved to the kitchen to whip up some hot chocolate, a comforting ritual that had become a tradition over the years. Lando made himself comfortable on the couch, glancing around her familiar apartment, feeling a sense of warmth and home that he hadn't felt in a while. She brought over two steaming mugs and handed one to him before settling next to him on the couch. The rich aroma of chocolate filled the air, blending with the soft glow of the lamps, creating a warm, intimate atmosphere.

“Thanks for this,” Lando said, taking a sip and sighing contentedly.

“Anytime,” Renn replied, smiling at him over the rim of her mug.

They sat in comfortable silence for a while, the sounds of the city outside a distant hum. The warmth of the hot chocolate seeped into their bones, relaxing them. A subtle touch on the knee from Lando, meant as a casual gesture of comfort, quickly became more. His fingers lingered, brushing lightly against her skin. Renn felt a spark of electricity at his touch, and she looked up to meet his eyes, finding them dark and filled with unspoken desire. Lando's hand moved from her knee to squeeze her thigh gently, the contact sending a thrill through her. Her breath hitched, and she set her mug down on the coffee table, unable to ignore the magnetic pull between them any longer.

Without thinking, she swung her leg over his lap, straddling him. Renn could feel his growing arousal pressing against her as she began to move, gently grinding herself against the buckle of his belt. The sensation was maddening, and a soft moan escaped her lips.

“Renn,” Lando groaned, his hands gripping her hips, guiding her movements. “You’re driving me crazy.”

She leaned down, capturing his lips in a searing kiss, all the pent-up longing and desire pouring out in that single moment. His hands slid under her dress, caressing the bare skin of her back, sending shivers down her spine. She could feel his heart racing against her chest, mirroring her own. Lando’s hands moved up to cup her breasts, his thumbs brushing over her nipples through the fabric of her bra. She arched into his touch, a gasp of pleasure escaping her. She tugged at his shirt, eager to feel his skin against hers. He quickly pulled it off, and she followed suit, shedding her dress.

They paused for a moment, just taking in the sight of each other, the raw desire in their eyes making the air between them crackle with electricity. Then their lips crashed together again, more desperate this time. Renn's fingers fumbled with the buckle of his belt, and Lando lifted his hips to help her, the urgency of their need driving them forward. Once his belt was undone, she pushed his pants down, freeing him from the confines. She could feel his hardness pressing against her core, separated only by the thin fabric of their underwear. The sensation was intoxicating, and she ground down against him, eliciting a deep moan from his lips.

“So good for me, baby,” he groaned, his hands gripping her thighs, guiding her movements.

She reached down, sliding her hand into his boxers and wrapping her fingers around him. He hissed in pleasure, his hips bucking up into her touch. She stroked him slowly, memorising the feel of him and the way he responded to her every touch. Unable to wait any longer, she stood up briefly, shedding her underwear and guiding him out of his boxers. The moment she straddled him again, they both gasped at the contact. Lando's hands gripped her hips tightly, positioning himself at her entrance.

“Are you sure?” he asked, his voice strained with desire.

“More than sure,” she breathed, lowering herself onto him, both of them groaning at the sensation as she gripped his shoulders to steady herself.

She set a slow, teasing pace at first, savouring every inch of him. His hands roamed her body, caressing and teasing, heightening her pleasure. As the intensity built, she quickened her pace, their moans and gasps filling the room. Lando thrust up to meet her movements, his hands guiding her, their bodies moving in perfect sync. The connection they shared, the raw intimacy of the moment, was almost too much to bear. Every time together felt like their very first time. The only difference was how much more they wanted it after each interaction. It was a drug, something they could easily get addicted to. She groaned again, feeling every sensation all over her body as he pressed his body against hers, his movements deliberate and unrelenting.

“Come on, let me hear you, baby,” he encouraged her, his voice a husky whisper in her ear. The sound of it sent a thrill through her, and she couldn't hold back the moan that escaped her lips.

“Lan,” she breathed, throwing her head back, her hands clutching at his shoulders for support. The intensity of their connection was overwhelming, each touch, each kiss, driving them both closer to the edge.

Renn's nails dug into his back as she clung to him, her breath coming in short, ragged gasps. The sensation of his skin against hers, the way he filled her completely, was intoxicating. His pace quickened, their movements becoming more urgent, more desperate. She could feel him trembling against her, could hear the strain in his voice as he fought to maintain control.

“Lan, I’m so close,” she whispered, her voice a mix of plea and promise. The tension inside her was building to an unbearable peak, and she knew it wouldn’t be long before she came undone in his arms.

“Me too, baby,” he replied, his grip on her tightening. “Just let go. I’ve got you.”

With those words, she felt herself teetering on the edge, her body trembling with anticipation. His movements became even more frantic, each thrust sending waves of pleasure coursing through her. She clung to him, her breath hitching, her heart pounding, and then she was falling, her body exploding in a white-hot blaze of ecstasy.

“Ah, fuck,” she cried out, her voice echoing through the room as she came apart in his arms. The intensity of her orgasm left her breathless, her body shuddering with each wave of pleasure.

Lando followed her over the edge moments later, his own release tearing through him with a force that left him gasping. He buried his face in the crook of her neck, his breath hot against her skin, his body trembling against hers. Finally, as the last tremors of their orgasms subsided, she slowed her movements, collapsing onto his chest with a contented sigh. His arms wrapped around her, holding her close as they both tried to catch their breath.

“God, Renn,” he murmured, his lips brushing against her hair. “That was incredible.”

“It really was,” she smiled, pressing a kiss to his chest. 

They lay there in a tangle of limbs, their hearts slowly returning to a normal rhythm. The intensity of their connection left them both feeling raw and exposed, but also deeply fulfilled. It was a feeling neither of them wanted to let go of, even though they knew their situation was far from simple.

Lando sighed, knowing it was time for him to leave. Their moments together were intense, passionate, and all-consuming, but they had made a simple agreement: to keep things casual, to not let their emotions complicate what they had. It was a struggle, maintaining that constraint, but they knew it was necessary for this to work. So, despite the pull to stay, he needed to leave.

“Let me clean you up before I go,” he whispered, his voice heavy with the dread of having to leave her. He lifted her off him gently and laid her down on the couch, her body still humming from their intimacy.

Renn watched him as he left to get a cloth from her bathroom, her heart aching at the thought of him leaving. The physical separation always felt like a small death, a reminder of the boundaries they had set for themselves. She sighed, trying to steel herself for his departure, knowing it was the only way to keep things from getting too complicated.

Lando returned with a warm, damp cloth, his expression tender as he knelt beside her. He began to clean her with careful, gentle strokes, his touch soothing and intimate. She closed her eyes, savouring the last few moments of their closeness before reality would force them apart again.

“There,” he said softly, finishing his task and pressing a kiss to her forehead. “All clean.”

“Thank you,” she murmured, opening her eyes to meet his. The tenderness in his gaze made her heart ache, but she forced a smile, not wanting to make this harder for him. “You should go.”

“Yeah, I should,” He nodded, though his reluctance was evident. 

They both knew it was for the best, even if it didn’t feel like it at the moment. Lando stood, pulling on his clothes and gathering his things. Renn sat up, wrapping herself in a blanket and watching him, trying to memorise every detail of the moment to hold onto until they could be together again.

“I’ll see you in Montreal, yeah?” he said, pausing at the door. “Text me when you’re done with your shoot tomorrow.”

“I will,” she promised, giving him a small smile. “I’ll see you in Montreal.”

With one last, lingering look, he left, closing the door softly behind him. Renn let out a long breath, the silence of the apartment settling around her like a heavy blanket. She missed him already, but she knew this was the only way to keep things from spiralling out of control. She got up, moving to the window to watch him as he walked down the street, his figure growing smaller until he disappeared around the corner to his car. When he was well and truly out of sight, her chest tightened, and tears welled up in her eyes. She had tried so hard to keep their arrangement simple, to keep her emotions in check, but seeing him walk away brought a flood of feelings she couldn't ignore.

Renn sank back onto the couch, her heart heavy with the weight of unshed tears. She had been so sure that keeping things casual would protect her, that it would keep her heart safe from the complications of love. But now, as she sat alone in the quiet of her apartment, she couldn't deny the truth any longer.

Has she fallen in love with him?

She sighed, turning away and heading to the bathroom to finish cleaning up. The echoes of their time together lingered in the air, a bittersweet reminder of what they shared. But as much as she tried to convince herself otherwise, she couldn't ignore the truth. She had fallen for Lando, and the realisation left her feeling both exhilarated and terrified. She didn't know what to do with these feelings, how to navigate the complexities of their relationship now that her heart was fully involved.

She needed time to process, to figure out what her heart was telling her. Maybe she could find a way to keep things as they were, to enjoy the moments they had without letting her feelings complicate everything. But deep down, she knew that pretending was no longer an option. Her heart had spoken, and there was no turning back. She loved Lando, and that truth would shape everything from this moment forward.

Back in the living room, she collapsed on the couch, pulling the blanket tighter around her. The intensity of their connection, the depth of their emotions, made it hard to stick to their agreement. But she knew they had to try, for the sake of their friendship and their sanity. Perhaps they needed to stop things before she got too attached. Maybe that was the solution.

------------------------------

Taglist: @fionamiller123 @f1fantasys

[writingroom21]

The Nanny

Pairing: rafe x nanny reader

Summary: Being Wheezie's nanny was great. The only downside is dealing with the oldest Cameron, Rafe. What happens when his fascination with the nanny becomes a reality?

Warnings: 18+, fingering, oral (m and f receiving)

wc: 4.9K

Chapter 2: Let the fun and games begin

The next day was a blur of anxiety as you didn’t know what to do about last night. Rose and Ward had left early this morning taking Wheezie to drop her off at her camp. That just left you, Sarah and Rafe all alone at Tannyhill. This normally wouldn’t have been a problem but considering Sarah is MIA it became one. Every room you enter fills you with anxiety and dread of seeing Rafe. How do you even look at him after what happened? After he caught you watching him fuck his fist. Alright you think as you start to throb just thinking about how his arms flexed everytime he stroked himself. This is getting out of hand, it was one thing for your thoughts to keep you up all night but it can't affect your daily routine.

What’s the worst that can happen right? So what if you stood there and watched him, he would have done the same in your position. Hell he probably would have taken it as an invitation if he walked in on you like that. But no matter how you tried to spin it in your head it all led to the same conclusion. You were utterly fucked. The past year was easy to blow him off, all you had to do was think about all the girls you saw crying over him. But now that you caught a glimpse of that side of him you can’t help wanting to get a closer look. It wouldn’t hurt to have a little fun, you thought. It really wouldn’t, he’s really handsome and if his reputation is right then he’s also really good in bed.

Then you think about Wheezie and how hurt she would be if something went wrong and you had to leave. The thought of hurting her alone was good enough for the thoughts to finally stop. No matter how attractive Rafe is it isn't worth it, plus his personality would probably ruin it before it even starts. Yeah the two of you are completely different, he grew up rich and thinks the world is his to rule and you grew up in the cut. If it wasn’t for this job you would still be living at home barely making anything to feed yourself. He only tolerates you because he thinks you are hot and you work for his family. Yup that it, right?

The tv plays in the background reruns of Grey’s Anatomy playing as you try to relax. It’s close to five o’clock and no one is in the house. Sarah is probably off with John B and Rafe is well he’s mostly likely off somewhere getting high. Derek’s voice plays in your ear as you focus back onto the screen forcing yourself to think of anything but the older Cameron. Watching as the surgery scene plays out your phone pings. Mom: Hi baby. Just wanted to let you know dad and I are having a cookout tomorrow night. We would like it if you came, we know you’re a busy bee but we miss you. You let out a sigh looking at the message. It wasn’t that your relationship with your parents is bad, they just expected a lot from you. 

It was always about getting good grades so you could get a good job and help them out with bills. They wanted you to take care of them once you had a stable job. So when you decided to take up a job as a nanny they weren’t too pleased.  The displeasure faded away once they found out it was being a nanny for the Camerons. Even though the paycheck was nice, well more than nice, it still wasn’t enough to cover their expenses and your own. It’s been a constant argument between the three of you. You type out a quick response before she starts sending you more. You: Hey! I miss you both. I’ll try to make it, Ward and Rose asked me to watch the house while they are gone. Your phone wasn’t even out of your hand before it went off again with another message. Mom: I’m sure they won’t mind you being away for a few hours. But if you can’t make it we will just see you another time then. Her message seems so understanding but deep down you know she's upset. Fingers go to respond but a voice scares you. The phone drops from your hand as you whip your head to look at who came into the living room. “Still pretending to text that boyfriend of yours?” Rafe says, making his way over to the couch and plopping down near you. Scoffing at him you respond. “No, I'm texting my mother.” “oh so you admit the boyfriend was fake.”

There’s a twinkle in his eyes as he grins at you, watching to see what your next move will be. “Yeah it was fun watching you get jealous but I decided to give it a rest for tonight.” The two of you just stare at each other for a moment, he’s looking at what you are wearing. You didn’t notice it at the time but it’s one of his old shirts that got mixed with your laundry a while ago. It looks like a dress on you blocking the view of your sleep shorts underneath. Which is a good thing because those shorts leave nothing to the imagination, barely covering you up from the world. Every now and then you wear it but only in your room, not allowing yourself to let him know you have it. 

“Nice shirt.” He comments scooting a bit closer to you on the couch. “You should wear it more often Sunny. Really makes your eyes pop.” Mhm you mumble knowing that he’s not looking anywhere near your eyes. In fact he’s staring at the exposed flesh of your thighs. Skimming up along your legs pausing for a moment at your cunt. Rafe’s eyes on you are making you wiggle in your seat as you try to focus back on the show. It is quiet for a moment as the voices of the characters fill the room. The sky outside starts to darken as the sun finally sets, the room painted in the soft lights of the screen.

Rafe is staring at you, looking at how the light washes of blue dance across your features as you try your best to not stare at him. Movement catches your attention as you see him slide further along the cushions to sit right next to you. “Where’s Sarah?” He whispers by my ear, his right hand brushes against your left thigh. “Um… I don’t know. Maybe she’s with John B or the rest of them.” Clearing your throat, the voice leaving you sounding weak. “Hmm so it’s just us in the house?” The question was met with his hand resting fully on your thigh. Lightly squeezing you as it slowly goes a bit higher right where the shirt ends, fingers quickly skirting underneath before going back to its original position. 

“Rafe.” The rest of the statement was cut off by him. ”Don’t do that. Enough with this game of cat and mouse. I know you want this as badly as I do.” A moan slips from you as his hand goes back under the shirt to tease you through your shorts. Rafe’s middle finger grazing you up and down, noticing the way your eyes screw shut. Creases forming around them as he keeps playing with you. “We shouldn’t do this, I literally work for your family.” You try to reason with him turning to be face to face, whimpering as the heat of his hand leaves as he retracts it. 

“I know.” He whispers as the hand that was touching your caresses your check, knotting into your hair to drag you closer. The other hand worms it way back to your shorts, sliding them to the side to finally feel you. “Fuck no panties? See you’re practically soaking those little shorts of yours.” You moan as he circles your clit with a feather-like touch. “Are you always this wet or do you like me touching you like this?” He chuckles as you move further into his touch. “You’re not special Cameron. I’m always this wet.” The response stops all movement, the grip in her hair tightening for a short second causing your eyes to open. Meeting the blue eyes that haunted you all night, you let go.  “Don’t stop.” 

Your lips crash into his, soft pillowy lips melting together, teeth nipping at each other's lips as Rafe’s fingers continue their assault. “That’s a good girl, Sunny. Fucking perfect.” The words tickle your lips, head thrown back as he makes his way to your entrance. Rafe pushes his middle finger in, dragging it along your walls in a delicious and intoxicating way. Moans keep slipping from your lips and only intensifies as his lips skate across your skin, latching onto your neck. 

A second finger joins his middle one curling just enough to hit your g-spot, tingles spread across your body, legs spreading giving him better access. “Right there.” You moan, your hand landing on his thigh trying to ground yourself when all you can feel is pleasure. Wet squelching fills your eyes only adding to the sensation of his thick fingers fucking you open. “That feel good, baby?” Rafe picks up his speed before taking his fingers out of you and putting them in his mouth. He moans around his fingers, pushing you back to lay down on the couch.  “Come on, pretty girl, lay down for me. Want to have my dinner.” 

Your brain is so hazy from having his fingers inside you that you don’t fight back. Lifting your hips, his hands wrap around your hips to pull the pathetic excuse you call shorts down your legs. The flimsy material being thrown off to the side, shirt pushed up to your waist exposing you to him for the first time. “God your pussy’s perfect. Look at it clenching around nothing. Want me to fill you up.” His lips start to kiss up your thigh, biting into the soft flesh when you don’t respond. “Please.” You whine 

“Please what? Use your words, I know a smart girl like you can do it.” The praise goes straight to your head, hips lifting off the couch trying to chase after his touch. “Please, sir.” The whimper halts Rafe and he stares up at you. After a moment of him not doing anything you look down at him between your legs. If you had a camera in this moment you would take a picture, he was a sight to be seen. Rafe’s lips are puffy and red but his eyes are staring at you with this hunger that makes you go to close your legs but he stops you. Both hands spread your legs as he dives into your cunt.

“Fuck that wasn’t what I was looking for but I’ll be damned if you don’t call me that.” His voice vibrates against you sending chills down your body. “Say it again.” His middle and ring finger push into you once again, pumping in a cruel slow pace. “Please, sir. It feels so good.” Your walls flutter around the fingers inside you, his tongue kitty licking your clit. “Such a good little slut. Begging me to keep finger fucking you like some depraved whore.” His words cause you to squeeze his finger and throw your head back with a moan. 

“Yeah you like being degraded?” A chuckle leaves him “Should’ve known you would like it. Prancing around the house in those little skirts. Just asking for me to bend you over some surface to fuck you. Bet you want me to fuck that attitude right out of you. Huh would that finally shut up that little mouth of yours?” With his fingers curling into you deeper and his mouth suctioning against your clit no words come out. Your mouth hangs open and all you can do is place your hand behind his head, keeping him as close as possible to you. 

A choked moan is lodged in your throat, eyes peeking at him through your lashes. His eyes are closed as he keeps devouring you, his hips thrusting into the couch to relieve the growing pain in his pants. Rafe wanted nothing more than to rip his pants off and shove his dick into your tight pussy. If you were squeezing him so nicely now, he can only imagine how good you would feel wrapped around his cock. He wanted to watch as you crumble into a mess of pleasure, taking his dick like a cock drunk slut. The thought of that alone causes his hips to stutter, the feeling making him moan into your pussy.

At this rate you can feel your peak creeping up fast. “Oh god Rafe. Don’t stop, please don’t stop.” Hips thrusting up to match the brutal pace his fingers have set. If you thought his arms looked good jerking himself off, nothing compares to watching it flex as he fucks you. “I’m not stopping, baby. I’m never going to stop. But that’s not my name.” Rafe means it too. Just the little taste of you has ruined him, no one will be able to compare to the sweet taste of you. “Sir!” you squeal. He's drunk off the feeling and taste of you, every clench of your pussy making him grind harder into the cushion. “I can feel you squeezing me. You want to be my good girl right? Cum for me Sunny.”

With a graze of his teeth on your clit, you were sent to ecstasy. Hips thrashing all around as he kept sucking on your clit, fingers pushing deeper into you riding out your orgasim. Once you come down he removes his fingers, quickly cleaning them with his tongue before diving back into you. Licking you clean and holding you down by the waist as you try to escape him. When he’s finally done he lets you go, leaning back, chest heaving looking down at you.

You were the prettiest thing he’s ever seen. So fucked out catching your breath with a peaceful look on your face. Eyes still closed you don’t notice him leaning back down, encasing your body with his. His thumb lightly dances along your cheek, waiting for you to open your eyes to look at him. “Thank you.” You whisper suddenly shy as if he wasn’t just eating you out like you were his last meal. Rafe laughs, kissing you deeply before moving off of you. “Such good manners.” He walks over to your shorts, throwing them back at you, making his way out of the room. “I have to go deal with something. I’ll be back later okay.”

Silence wraps around you, the tv displaying Are you still watching? Getting up you pull your shorts back on looking around the couch for your phone and the remote. Finding your phone you also notice something on the couch. A huge wet spot from where you were laying, heat rushes to your checks knowing you just soiled an expensive couch.

✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶

The rest of the night was uneventful, Sarah never came back home so you were left all alone. Usually you and Wheezie would spend the summer nights outside swimming in the pool or staying up late chatting about god knows what. Without her there really wasn’t anything to do besides lay around or go to a party. After much consideration the only one that seemed right was staying at home. You knew Rafe would most likely be at the party, the something he had to deal with being selling coke. After last night and tonight you don’t even know how to face him again.

So staying at home was the best option in your books. A few hours were spent reading whatever romance book was on your bookshelf and making dinner for yourself. By midnight you were fast asleep in your room. Sleeping so peacefully, the sounds of the bedroom door opening weren't noticed. It was the door closing that stirred you from your slumber, looking at the bedside clock you noticed it was past two in the morning. Soft footsteps echo in the dark room, the person fumbling their way around knocking down whatever they made contact with. “Fuck” they curse the sound barely reachign you.

Scared and not knowing what to do you lay there slowly reaching for the bat by your bed. Even though this is a good neighborhood and people would have to have the gate code to get in you can never be too safe. The bat is now next to you in the bed, the side behind you dipping with the weight of the person sitting on it. “Sunny.” They whisper. Are you fucking kiddin’t me? “Rafe?” His hand wraps around you to turn you around, the bat coming along with you. “Jesus. Is that a fucking bat?”

Rafe slips it out of your hand placing it under your bed before going back to you. “Do you always keep a bat on you?” “Depends. Do you always sneak into girls' beds at two in the morning?” The moon shining through the windows dimly lit the room, contouring his face. “Only the pretty ones.” He whispers in the space between you two, telling you a secret he normally wouldn’t say. “I’m sure you say that to all of them.” You tease trying to put distance between you both. It’s weird having him laying in your bed, sure the two of you were friendly, things only changing the previous day. But this is different, he’s in your room, he’s laying in your bed next to you.

“Nah none of them need the sweet words to sleep with me.” Cocky tone matching the grin growing on his face. “Oh of course. Forgot that the kook king was also a king in the bedroom.” Rolling your eyes and lying on your back, you stare at the ceiling. Of course he would only say nice things to get into your pants, you don’t know why you could even think differently. Rafe’s face invades your eye line as he rests all his weight onto one arm to get a better look at you. His eyes are bloodshot, pupils dilated scanning your face hoping it can tell him what you are thinking. 

“Penny for your thoughts.” Your eyes shut trying to form words with all the things you want to say. That he made you feel something no one else has been able to do, how you want to keep chasing that feeling, but more importantly that it was a mistake. It doesn’t matter that it felt amazing, that whatever it was would only lead to heartbreak. You’ve seen this film before with all the girls he flaunted around the house. “This.” You clear your throat, averting your eyes to the window. “This can’t keep happening.” 

Rafe takes a hold of your chin turning you to look at him. “Do you want it to keep happening?” The loaded question fizzling in the air was replaced by a quick “No.” leaving your lips. “But it doesn’t matter what I want.” “It does matter.” Blue eyes burning into your own pleading for you not to take away these moments. Communicating with you that he needs this as much as you need him. “It can be our little secret. I promise I won’t tell.” You giggle, his head burying into the crook of your neck, kissing the junction where your shoulder and neck meets. 

You try to push him by his shoulder but he won’t budge, kissing up your neck until he meets your ear. “Stop letting life pass you by. You stay cooped up in this house with Wheeze all day, she’s not a kid you know. When was the last time you let yourself go?” His breath tickles your ear before biting it and continuing to kiss your skin. Rafe’s right, you don’t do anything fun anymore. Before you took this job you would go out constantly, always with friends running around the island. Wheezie shouldn’t even need a nanny, the only reason you have this job is because Ward was scared. Sarah running away and Rafe doing drugs all the time made him paranoid, he doesn’t want the same to happen to her.

“I don’t know, I would say what we did on the couch would count.” His kisses travel to your jaw, then check, and finally meet your lips. “Yeah I would say it counts. Fucking soaked the couch from how wet you were.” You tense for a moment, embarrassed that he noticed the mess you made. “Nah nah don’t get shy on me pretty girl. You’re just as dirty and depraved as I am.” Pretty girl, that's the second time he’s called you pretty since he sneaked into your room. “You’re high, you should go to sleep.”

“Not high, that shit is practically out of my system at this point.” Kissing your lips he weasels his way on top of you. Your legs widening allowing him to slot his hips between yours, his dick rubbing you in the right way. You are still wearing the shorts from earlier, his dick making the fabric  stick to your folds. “Just want to feel you.” Rafe’s words punctuated with his hips slowly thrusting against you, lips kissing any exposed skin he can get to. “I’m not letting you fuck me after you’ve been taking drugs all night.”

You can feel him smile against your skin, giving you a peck and moving his head to meet your gaze. “So what I’m hearing is you would let me fuck you any other time.” scoffing you roll your eyes flicking his forehead. “Yeah dumbass that’s what I’m saying. It's too bad. I guess we’ll have to find another way.” “Another way?” There’s that smirk again, a fluttering feeling starts in your stomach. Shaking the feeling away you pull him up by his face to kiss you, using all of your body weight to get him on his back. Throwing your leg over his hip you straddle him. 

Rafe is the first to break the kiss, watching you from below as you start to grind against him. “Tell me princess exactly what is this other way?” The hand that was resting on your neck makes its way down the valley of your breast, teasing you nipples through the shirt with a pinch before finding its home on your hip. Viewing him from this angle is breathtaking, the moon painting him in a light blue. “Let me suck your dick.” His hips thrust up into your after hearing how you want to suck him off. “Yeah? Want to put the little mouth of yours to good use.” You grind a little harder leaning down to kiss his neck.

There’s a slight taste of sweat on his skin, probably from partying too hard, it doesn’t stop you from sucking on his pulse point. Pecking up to his ear and placing kisses right behind it, gaining moans from him. Bingo. Sucking on his sweat spot he uses his grip on your hips to move you back and forth. “Yeah. I want to feel you in my mouth, want to taste you.” This causes him to groan bucking into you. “Fuck! Yeah, yeah you can have whatever you want baby.” The words are like a reward, smiling as you look down at him, your hair covering the two of you from the outside world.

“Good boy.” Two simple words, two words that had him wrapped around your finger. The grip on your hip tightens as you kiss down his body, pulling his shirt over his head so you can nip at his skin. Your hands reach between your bodies undoing the belt and pants button easing the pain the zipper was giving him. He’s so painfully hard he can’t even remember the last time he wanted someone this much. “You like being my good boy just as much as I like being your good girl. If you admit it I’ll suck you so good.” You whisper, eyes flickering up to look at him. 

If his ego wasn’t so big he would admit it, he would tell you just how fucking bad he wanted to be good for you. But that’s not who he is, admitting something like that would just show you how weak he truly is, he can’t do that. “Oh you begging for me to fill that mouth up of yours and fuck that tone out of you.” He taunts from above, grasping at anything to give him the upper hand. “You’ll definitely be filling up my mouth. It’s just going to be under my rules.” Pushes his shorts and boxers down his cock springs free bobbing in front of your face. Reaching up you grab him and give him a little squeeze, electing a groan out of the boy laid out on your bed.

You kiss his left thigh before licking him from the base up to the mushroom tip that was red, begging for attention. The taste of pre-cum invades your tongue as you wrap your lips around him, sucking just the tip. He’s heavy in your mouth and you only have the tip in but based off of the quick glance you got you knew he was big. Like huge, he’s also wide, stretching your lips as you take more of him in. If he’s stretching you out like this then you can only imagine what fucking him would do. As if Rafe was a mind reader he calms your nerves. “Don’t worry baby, we’ll make it fit. Just…just keep sucking like that.” 

Humming around him, you start to move your head up and down, making sure to hollow your cheeks and give him a nice long suck on the way up. Repeating the motion you get into a rhythm, right hand wrapped around what you can’t fit helping you along. “Fuck that feels good. Who knew that mouth was good for something else other than talking back.” The vibrations of your chuckle send pleasure through Rafe’s body. He doesn’t know whether to watch you or to shut his eyes and enjoy the moment. But looking at the way your eyes are closed, worshiping his dick has him throwing his head back. His eyes closing, moans escaping him as he wraps your hair in a ponytail in his hands. Guiding your pace he pulls your hair this causes you to moan around the sensation making you wet. 

“Touch yourself.” The command takes you by surprise, following it, your unoccupied hand makes its way into your shorts. You're wet, wet is an understatement, you were soaked. You would never admit this but you liked the feeling of him in your mouth, the feeling of him rutting into you. “You get off on this shit don’t you?” Your fingers rub faster on your clit, already so close to cumming just by sucking him off. “Knew you were a cock slut. Damn baby.” He huffs between breaths. 

All you can do is moan and keep sucking, picking up the pace of your bobbing, moving your arm to slip a finger inside yourself. Rafe lifts his head at your movements, entranced by just watching you. His beautiful little Sunny being perfect, your eyes flutter open and his breath hitches. He’s going to remember this moment forever, it’s going to play on repeat in his head every minute of every day. Whatever happens after this is worth it in his eyes, this right here made it worth it. “If you keep going I’m gonna cum.” He moans, head falling back onto your pillow. 

Disconnecting from him a string of saliva and pre-cum kept the two of you tethered. “That’s kinda the point, pretty boy.” You continue your previous movements, on the verge of cumming yourself. You can feel him throbbing ready to explode in your mouth so you squeeze his base tighter, letting him know it's okay and you want it. “Can you be a good boy and come for me sir?” Not even a second later he lets go, white ropes of cum filling your mouth as you cum right after him. Swallowing around him, you let him go, releasing him from your mouth, the hand in your pants laying motionless. 

Rafe lets go of your hair, grabbing your arms to pull you up his body. The motion was so fast that you had to catch yourself as your body tumbles on top of him. He reaches for your hand, still glistening from your sum to pop them into his mouth. Rafe’s tongue swirls around the digest, licking them clean and releasing them to kiss you. “Taste just as sweet like before.” He kisses you, turning your bodies so you are both laying on your sides.

He has a soft smile on his lips, hands rubbing up and down your arm as he regulates his breathing. “Did so good, sunny.” His eyes are barely open, fighting off the sleep threatening to overcome him. “Yeah?” You whisper resting your head on his shoulder, feeling a sense of comfort with his arms wrapped around you. Snoring mets your ears as sleep takes you along with it. For the second night in a row, you go to bed with the taste of him still lingering on your taste buds.

[gay-dorito-dust]

could you write something like the reader is taking college classes, but they struggle to keep focus on their studies (ex.: talking to stan, picking at their nails, watching tv, doodling) so ford sits down at the table with them and helps

(this is a major self insert 😭 psychology is gonna be the death of me)

While college had opened up a lot of opportunities for potential career prospects, which was amazing and all, but you had troubles prioritising your studies like you probably should.

The course you’ve taken was one you’d like to pursue as a future career but you couldn’t even find yourself able to focus on what what being said to you. You’d either be more engaged in writing secret notes with Stanley, throwing it across the room to him with the professor has his back to you and vice versa, doodling within the margins of your note book or just doing anything other then paying attention.

Ford noticed all of this and so would carry a secondary notebook on him for you to write down the things that you missed out on via disassociating or other distractions. He knew that you wanted to focus but everything was going against you from doing that and he didn’t blame you.

He just wanted what was best for you and instead of babying you through the entire course, Ford would set up some study sessions to catch you up on bits and pieces when you started to find passing notes to Stan more interesting, instead of progressing through the course. (He’s totally not salty that you were passing notes to his brother and not him. Totally not.)

He makes sure there’s nothing within his room that could cause you distractions, so that you could better focus on your studies with him, which meant that Stan was banned from disturbing you both just to say something stupid and silly. Ford knew there was a time and place for everything, however the constant distractions in your studies had been nothing but the biggest obstacle in your life thus far, and Ford could tell that it was affecting you and wanted to help you however he could.

He had cue cards prepared and somehow he managed to fit a whole paragraphs worth of information within those small cards thanks to his cursive writing…you think he may or may not understand the primary use of cue cards but you were more then happy Ford was going out of his way to make sure you didn’t fall behind in classes. So you didn’t say anything and tried to decipher his cursive handwriting.

He’d even do some double page spread revision pages filled with doodles, highlighting the important aspects of the course, annotations and so much more which only made you appreciate Ford even more when realising just the amount of effort he went through just for you. It was really sweet and you couldn’t help but be touched by everything he had done for you that by the end of the session you gave him a massive hug.

‘What’s all this about?’ He’d ask as he hugs you back wholeheartedly.

‘Just to thank you for helping me study and everything when you didn’t have to.’ You replied as you burrowed your face into his neck.

‘It’s not a problem my dear, I just want you to excel at your college courses, and I know you can’t help in getting distracted but I would advice you to try to the best of your ability.’ Ford said as he rubbed your back soothingly.

‘Like doodling what I see on the board and annotations?’ You asked.

‘Exactly, turn your distractions into a form of studying, anything you see or hear that’s related to the course or future examinations, write them down instead for future reference.’ Ford encourages. You were really happy to have someone like Ford to talk you into taking your distractions and making them beneficial for you and your studies.

‘Thank you Ford.’ You said.

‘It’s not a problem my dear, not at all.’ Ford says in response.

[alicerosejensen]

Warning: Yandere!Older Leon; young reader (20-25 years old); kidnapping, pet names, not Stockholm Syndrome, but the reader no longer resists Leon; mentions of sex; mentions of pregnancy, apathy.

Synopsis: If you knew who Leon Kennedy was, you would have avoided him, but it's too late.

A/N: I'm bad at writing summaries and coming up with titles for this shit. Just a yandere Leon and his pregnant reader hidden from the whole world.

It was raining incessantly for the second day, rolling down the glass of the second-floor window in large drops when you were lying on a straightened bed and staring unblinkingly at the weather raging outside in one of the wide warm hoodies. Even a favorite TV show or a good movie with delicious food could not brighten up the gloom of a gray day, because didn't want to get up and go down at all, especially since has already returned home.

Leon probably didn't bother to find out the weather forecast for the next few days, because he left the house on one motorcycle, which should have already been parked in the garage. You listened with bated breath to the heavy footsteps of his shoes as he climbed to the second floor after opening all these numerous locks on the front door. At some point, you even felt that small wave of fear that sometimes overwhelmed you when he was around.

You have been in his hands for more than a year, during which he suppressed all resistance but was never able to get what he wanted - your love. He probably should have turned to a specialist and fixed his head since he really didn’t understand why you didn’t love him and didn’t want to make contact, on the other hand, such an influence made you obey Leon and even enjoy sex with him after which you felt guilty. Ultimately, given the fact that Leon did not consider it necessary to protect himself, this resulted in undesirable consequences. For you, not for him.

When the bedroom door opened, you held your breath as he walked over to the other side of the bed and sat down, reaching out to you. Water from his wet hair dripped onto your face but he didn't seem to care as he leaned towards you placing one hand on your bump.

You didn’t even flinch or turn to him when his lips touched your neck.

"How are my pretty girl and our baby feeling?" the whisper sent a chill inside.

It wasn't worth the risk of testing his patience. You already tried and realized that it would be worse only for you but not for him.

Leon put his hand under your sweatshirt, pressing lightly on you, forcing you to turn to face him so that you were faced with the blue of his eyes, which looked at you with manic admiration.

“I...we’re fine,” you replied, watching him take off his wet leather jacket, throwing it somewhere towards the window and wrapping his arms around your pregnant belly.

The belly that you hated so much and preferred to wear oversized clothes so as not to notice it in the mirror until the last moment.

“My baby…” with trembling reverence, Leon put his head on your stomach, lifting up your hoodie, kissing the warm skin "my baby… Dad missed you two so much. You know, I brought gifts," he grinned, looking at you.

This sight made you sick, causing another surge of hostility towards him and your unwanted pregnancy.

"I want to see how your belly grows...how my baby grows inside you."

“Leon, I don’t think...” you didn’t finish as he interrupted you.

"Do not think!" He said authoritatively, sitting back on the edge of the bed with the intention of paying attention to you. “Will I think for the two of us or would it be more correct to say for the three of us?” that grin of his again

He probably didn't like that sweatshirt you were wearing, so he asked you to wait while he came down to get your gift. Leon quickly left the bedroom and you were able to breathe a little sigh of relief after straightening your clothes, although the happiness was short-lived and just a couple of minutes later Leon returned with a small white box wrapped in red ribbon, which he handed to you, sitting next to you.

"What is this?" you asked, looking at the light-weight box, afraid to open it, as if there was a bomb in there.

"Open it"

Your hands slowly reached for the ribbon, pulling it towards you. A thin strip of fabric fell into your lap, and you opened the lid of the box, putting it next to you on the bed, looking at a set of lace pajamas with an almost indifferent look, consisting of short light gray shorts that looked more like panties, and a pale pink T-shirt with a cute bow under the bodice. It matched the size, but would definitely emphasize your rounded belly.

"I'm sure this will suit you. It's like you're carrying my gift under your heart." He said, noticing the indifference on your face. “Don’t you like it, angel?”

You liked it before. You think that if he were a normal guy and not a psycho with a mania to control your life every breath, then you would be a gift, but in reality, no. However, it was better to lie.

“It's beautiful, I’m just tired. I don’t feel very well,” his hands immediately reached out to you and pressed you to him, stroking your head and kissing your temple.

"Oh, well, I'm already here for you." you snorted quietly, only thinking about how peaceful it was without him. “I want you to wear this today. In the meantime, let’s go, I want to show you something.”

You put the pajamas back in the box and had no desire to go with him, but Leon took your hand and hugged your waist, gently pushing you towards the door. He probably bought something for the baby too, but it was probably some small thing like a toy or a rattle, but in spite of that, he opened the door of an unfinished children’s room for you that still needed to be painted. He had already ordered a changing table and a baby chest of drawers, which arrived about three weeks ago and now stood alone in an empty room. Leon led you to the changing table and you saw two pairs of baby undershirts.

"couldn't help but buy for our baby" His hands continued to caress your belly, irritating you even more "Especially since I took a few unpaid days off and we can order other things."

“It’s too early for such purchases”

“We will be ready in advance,” another kiss fell on the back of the head, “especially since time will fly by quickly, before we have time to look back, our child will already be in our arms.”

This is what you are so afraid of. Leon doesn't even notice the fear of pregnancy and completely ignores your reluctance to become the mother of his child. Your eyes began to tear up looking at the children’s things that you wanted to tear and throw with all the pent-up rage in his face! You wanted to break all this furniture, because everything that happened to you was not your desire. And you didn’t want and don’t want this child.

Does he really think that you like being locked up in his house and carrying his child?! What has the government done to his brain that Leon thinks he has the right to control your life?

"What is it, angel?" Leon asked seeing tears in your eyes. His lips continued to kiss your head down to your neck. You couldn't even resist while he held you to his chest.

“I...don’t want to,” your voice cracked from the bitter lump in your throat.

Leon sighed irritably, making you a little scared, but nevertheless, tears flowed down your cheeks. His hands squeezed your waist almost to the point of pain as he turned you around to face him. A spark of incipient anger flashed in his pale blue eyes, but he pulled himself together, but for a short moment he looked away, trying not to break down. After all, he was already sure that he had suppressed all your resistance and convinced you that only he could take care of you in this cruel world. An oppressive atmosphere reigned in the nursery. Leon's silence was frightening, making you regret what you said. Under the gaze, wanted to shrink and cry somewhere in the corner of the room and finally wake up from all this nightmare.

"It's just hormones" Leon's dissatisfied tone did not let you be deceived. "A little excitement, that's all. Do you believe me, but I'm worried too? This is normal, because this is our first child."

You wanted to howl after those words. The thought that you would have to give birth to hated children from your abductor and stay locked up for days without permission to go out at least into the courtyard of the house did not inspire you with happiness. Leon controlled every aspect of your life and, of course, will control the lives of his children, who will definitely not be happy.

"You don't have to say that. When the baby is born, everything will get better, it will be a little hard for us at first, but you know, I'm thinking of putting a crib in our bedroom. So we don't have to run to another room when the baby wakes up." his gaze softened for a moment and he took your face in his hands, carefully wiping tears from his cheeks with his thumb "Just nerves okay? I know that we will be so happy as soon as this lump of happiness finally appears on our hands. I've wanted a family all my life and now I won't miss this opportunity."

"It was your dream, not mine." the words spoken had a touch of light courage, although they were uttered with apprehension and even despair.

"It will also be your dream" Leon kissed you on the forehead, pressing to his chest "We will be so happy. I promise"

"Do you really think I'm happy here? Do you really think it's okay to keep me under surveillance here like I'm a criminal? Do you really think I'll be happy to be the mother of a child I never wanted?!"

Leon grabbed you by the face harder, forcing you to hold your breath and your heart beat faster from fear. Of course, he never beat, but sometimes his punishments were worse than physical violence, but inside there was a glimmer of hope that he would be afraid to cause any harm because of your pregnancy.

"I'm doing this for your safety. Believe me, one day completely changed my life and I'm not going to lose the people I care about anymore. The world outside is very dangerous and you just can't survive without someone to take care of you, but that someone is me."

"If the world is as dangerous as you say, then why the hell do you decide to have children?"

A logical damn question! And Leon was clearly confused by it. But selfish desires sometimes overshadow the human mind.

"I'm trying to end this crap. Once I thought it was really wrong, but eventually I thought it over…what's wrong with coming from hell to a house where your real family is waiting for you? Cute kids from my beloved wife who would meet me at the door and whom I would hug. I didn't have a family," he said sadly, "I lost my parents too early, when I was still a child myself, and I always wanted my father to be proud of my achievements at school or teach something new. I hardly remember my mother's affection, but I can give it to our children!"

"This is not the answer to the question" You said without pausing like a statue in front of him clenched in strong male hands

"well…" Leon grinned loosening his grip, "in any period of humanity there have always been their own dangers: diseases, wars, famine, pandemics and so on. But if everyone thinks as I thought before, then humanity will definitely die out. My fear should not interfere with my happiness. The main thing is that I can take care of everything and keep my family safe."

His conviction of his own rightness was indestructible. Leon perceived your abduction and forcible detention as forced care for a loved one who could get hurt with an ordinary fork if he relaxed his vigilance a little. In the end, he grabbed your hand and dragged you down to the first floor, squeezing your fingers tightly, as if he was afraid that you might dissolve at any second. But, unfortunately, all past escape attempts were doomed to failure in advance. Perhaps if you play the obedient girl for a long time, pretending that they really love him and accept this abnormal care, then one day you will have a chance to sneak away, but how long will it take? A year? Two? By that time, the baby will already be born, and for some reason you were sure that his hypercontrol would only increase several times.

Suddenly a funny thought came to mind.

Leon once mentioned that he was a policeman. Apparently, he took the phrase "to serve and protect" too literally.

"What now? Will you punish me?" you asked feeling completely desperate because you were not sure that your acting could last so long that he would believe in this lie. Even if you run away, how long will it take him to find you? You can only escape from Kennedy to the next world.

Leon sat you down at the table intending to take care of your lunch, besides, it was certainly important to him that you eat properly and properly. He seems to have read all the books that said what pregnant women can and cannot eat. By the way, he ignored your question for a long time until you called out to him again.

"You are an obedient girl and don't do anything that could harm our child. I'm sure it's just hormones and nerves. When you give birth, you will feel the joy of motherhood"

As if not so!

You wanted to flush his love and care down the toilet because… you did not experience any Stockholm syndrome and if at the beginning of your acquaintance with Leon you experienced exceptionally bright feelings, perhaps even falling in love, now there was nothing but rejection. Although they don't want to admit to themselves that…sometimes his shoulder and gentle strokes were the most beautiful that you could only get in a lifetime.

In the end, you spent the evening on the couch watching some show curled up in a ball while Leon was sitting somewhere behind typing something on a laptop. He checked on you a couple of times and couldn't resist kissing you on the forehead, as if he thought that in front of him was a cute plush toy that needed to be cuddled. You didn't know what to do and whether you would ever be free again…maybe if one day he gets killed in the line of duty…

You stole a look at him when Leon was brushing his teeth in the bathroom and you were already lying in bed in that new lace pajamas. The thought was seductive and to some extent intoxicating, because perhaps it was his accidental death that could one day free you from this imprisonment.

Even when he lay down next to you, especially intently examining your bulging belly, which was noticeable in such clothes.

Leon pulls up his shirt and leaves a wet kiss near the navel while you scroll through this thought in your head.

Perhaps one day the higher powers will have mercy on you, and everything will end… But now, it seems, there was nothing else to do but just accept your inevitable fate and find himself back in the warm embrace from which gradually does not want to get out.

[herlv3r]

tip toe

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.

୨୧ synopsis: as le sserafim’s comeback had just released, your girlfriend is extremely busy with promotions and is under strict supervision. her managers have clearly warned you to stay away for the time being, but is that really going to stop you?

୨୧ pairing: gf!chaewon x fem!reader

୨୧ genre: fluff

୨୧ a/n: stream fimmies new mini album or else i WILL hunt you down

you grip on your fimbong as anticipation builds up in you like you’re about to explode. sitting in front of your tv, the screen counts down from its final minute. as the countdown nears its end, you can’t help but to stand up, adrenaline filling your veins.

even though your girlfriend already spoiled you their new song, you can’t help the excitement as if you’re hearing it for the first time all over again.

memories begin rushing in from when she first auditioned for woollim entertainment, then her time with izone, and finally le sserafim. you were there with her every step of the way. to say how proud you are is really an understatement.

your eyes gleam seeing chaewon’s outstanding visuals. and hearing her sing through the screen blesses your ears. how’d you get so lucky with her?

your phone rings violently as a call from chaewon comes through. answering it, a soft voice warms your ears.

“babe did you watch?!?” excitement is evident in her tone. you giggle at her question when it’s obvious you did. “of course i did! i wouldn’t miss even a second of it.”

you hear her small laugh amidst the busy background. “okay i gotta prepare for the showcase. i love you and i miss you.” your stomach fills with butterflies hearing those words escape her mouth. “good luck! i’ll be cheering for you.”

every comeback is always filled with busy schedules and strict rules. you can’t even remember the last time you’ve held her in your arms. you know dating a kpop idol comes with an unspoken requirement of being patient but you long for her.

the last time you attempted to see her during promotions got you banned from stepping in their dorms. as much as you want to see her, you have to do what’s best for your girlfriend.

hours past since the showcase and you haven’t heard anything from chaewon ever since. slumping in your seat, your brows drew together thinking heavily on what she could be doing at the moment.

suddenly a text notification causes your phone to vibrate. “i want to see you. pick me up at my dorm?” that burst of adrenaline comes rushing back to you, as you read word by word. excitedly getting up and gathering everything you need, you rush out the door without looking back.

who cares if you get banned again, it's worth the risk. after all, it's her personal request. how can you pass on something like that?

pulling up to her dorm, you hurriedly park and skipped your way to her room. once reaching her floor, you make eye contact with chaewon, her eyes widen in shock. the dumb smile on your face is quickly replaced with a terrified expression after realizing she's talking to her manager.

making the fastest u-turn in your life, you rush back down the stairs nearly tripping in the process. panting for air, you arrive back at the lobby searching for a place to hide.

several minutes past and you've finally calmed down. that was a close call you thought. as you slowly peek over your hiding place, a hard slap stings your head. looking back to see who it was, you're met with chewon glaring down at you. without saying a word, the expression on her face clearly says, "you're such a dumbass."

swiftly standing up, you engulf her in your arms as you squeeze the air out of her. "chaechae i missed you!!" in response, she pinches your waist causing you to squeal and back away.

attempting to rub the pain away, you look at her in confusion. why is she so violent today? has she finally lost it?

"god that was a close call. if my manager saw you first then our whole sneaking out plan is over." you swear you can see steam escaping from the top of her head as she complains.

tilting your head down, a sly smile forms on your lips. "but he didn't see me, so it's all good." she scoffs at you, rolling her eyes and taking your hand in hers. "come on let's go before we get caught." she drags you behind her as she sneakily makes her way back to your car.

you've been aimlessly driving for the past couple of minutes, unsure if chaewon even notices. you weren't expecting a spontaneous hang out today, so you were severely unprepared.

you're terrible at hiding things from her especially with the occasional side eyes you've been giving. she eventually catches on to you.

"how about a convenience store run, just like old times?" pursing your lips you glance at her as if you already had that thought. "pfft, yeah i was already heading there."

"but you just missed the turn..." staring at you, she furrows her eyebrows. "babe i can't see, it's dark out here." out of habit she smacks your arm causing you to swerve a little bit. too busy laughing uncontrollably to even notice.

arriving at the parking lot, you instruct chaewon to stay in the car hoping to avoid any unwanted attention.

walking in the store, you can't help but feel a little guilty. it's such a big day for chaewon but the only thing you can give her is cheap food. still, it's no excuse to not try to make the best out of the night.

making your way down several isles you surprisingly bump into chaewon already picking out items. stopping in your tracks, you cross your arms and tap your feet in disbelief. you cough deliberately, attempting to gain her attention.

"pfft, what?" she doesn't even bother looking at you. "what do you mean, 'what'?" slowly approaching her, you snatch the kimbap she was holding. quickly turning her head, she raises a brow.

"babe you're such a hypocrite. you got mad at me earlier for almost getting caught but look at you now." she snatches the kimbap back from your grasp. "it's okay, i'm covered up good."

finally acknowledging your disappointed look, she squeezes your cheeks. "baby i'm sorry. i'll be careful." giving in to her soft touch, you let it slide. how can you possibly get mad at her?

luckily you were able to leave without anyone recognizing your girlfriend. you wouldn't know what to do if someone did.

getting in the drivers seat, you're hit with realization of not knowing where to go next. resting your head on the steering wheel, you release an exasperated sigh as you struggle to think of a destination.

"make a right turn and take the next exit."

shooting your head up, you stare at the gps. confused as to why it spoke. your gaze shifts back and forth between chaewon and the route displayed on the car's screen, wondering if she had anything to do with it.

chaewon smiles as she comfortably sinks in her seat, "just drive baby." you study her expression, suspicious of her little scheme. "mhm... should i trust you?" the blank expression sitting on her face hints at you to just go without question. you nod in defeat and turned on the engine.

for what seemed like 30 minutes, you're starting to doubt your gps when it leads you to an isolated road. the only source of light that's surrounding you is the brightness of your headlights. it's like you're in a horror movie where you encounter an eerie girl standing on the side of the road.

an uneasy feeling in your stomach begins to stir just by thinking about it. you quickly glace at chaewon whose face is as pale as snow. "you good? you don't usually look as white." she grips on to her thighs and swallows hard. "why wouldn't i be? hehe..."

you knew what she felt at the moment. she's scared shitless. your heart starts to beat . "hey you can't be scared?! because i'm scared... we can't both be scared!"

her grasp transfers from her thigh to your shirt. "girl, just drive!" you immediately step on the gas without a second thought.

"you have arrived. your destination should be on the left." pulling up to a secluded area, a single bench facing a cliff sits under a soft lit lamp post. not creepy at all...

"welp, ladies first," you laugh awkwardly as you unlock the doors. she shook her head in disagreement. "what, you can't do that! you took me here." you lifted an eyebrow and crossed your arms.

"don't make me go out there first, please baby," the look in chaewon’s eyes has you completely entranced. heat rushes to your face, staining it red. it took you a moment to form a response. “you’re a coward,” you murmured.

you push your car door open and hopped out. stepping foot on the rocky ground, the cool evening breeze sends shivers down your spine. you felt vulnerable being outside the walls of your car. in a snap you hurriedly ran to the other side to open the door for your girlfriend.

chaewon steps out and gently pats your cheeks as a thanks. “okay come with me.” she interlocks your fingers, leaving you no choice but to follow.

as you slowly approach the edge of the cliff, the view of the city lights comes into sight, leaving you mesmerized. who knew such a place existed that overlooks the city. chaewon lets go of your hand, letting you take in the scenery.

gawking for too long, you didn’t even notice the feeling of fear had completely washed away. discovering chaewon’s slipped away from your side, you promptly turned around only to see her resting on the bench behind you. she pats the empty space beside her gesturing you to sit down.

“so how’d you know about this place?” you drop your weight on the old wooden material. chaewon shifts closer to you and rests her head on your shoulder.

“i used to come here a lot with my grandma. we’d clear our heads and just talk.” you’re left speechless as you figure out where this is heading. “i wanted to share it with you for awhile now.” your heart softens at her words, realizing you occupy a special place in her heart.

you chuckle as you start playing with her hair, "thank you."

you both sit in comfortable silence just admiring the night sky. after a short while, you felt chaewon's grip on your hand loosen. turning your head to look at her, her eyes completely closed as her chest rises and falls.

looking at the time, it's nearing 1 in the morning. she must be exhausted after such a busy day. you can't even imagine what she'll have to go through later.

you lightly squeeze her, attempting to not startle her. "baby let's take you home yeah?" she groans in response with her eyes still glued shut.

crouching down, you force her to get on your back. you carried her back to the car and gently placed her in the passenger seat. you slowly walked back to the drivers side, taking in the view one last time. bringing her back here for your anniversary would be lovely, you thought.

as you comfortably sunk in your seat, you removed your jacket and wrapped it around chaewon's small figure. she shifts in her spot, turning in your direction giving you a tired smile.

"i'm sorry, did i wake you?" you rub her cheek with your thumb. she timidly shakes her head no.

"if i had known you'd take me here, i would've prepared much more." she chuckles at your statement. "don't be silly, being here with you is more than enough." shutting her eyes again, she falls back asleep. releasing a satisfied hum, you start the engine once again.

the streetlights illuminated the quiet streets and cars sat empty in parking lots. parking in front of her building, you sat there admiring how peaceful and cute she looked.

you shook her softly, "chaewonie we’re here." she yawns heavily and stretches in her seat. rubbing her cheeks, she slowly opens her eyes taking in her surroundings. taking hold of her soft hand, you walk her inside.

arriving at her front door, she turns to you with her head down. "i don't want you to leave... stay with me a little longer?" she tightly clutches on the hem of your shirt. "please?"

without warning, the door bursts open revealing a fully awake eunchae. she looks at you and chaewon cringing. "damn guys it's late. wrap it up please."

"isn't it past your bed time?" chaewon lifts a brow. eunchae crosses her arms as she leans against the door frame. "do you want me to rat you out."

chaewon's eyes widen at eunchae's response. lifting a fist in the air, she makes a threatening gesture. "i'm your leader, you can't tell me what to do." she pushes eunchae back inside, shutting the door at her face.

rubbing your eyes, you can't help but laugh at their interaction. "what's so funny?" she nudges you. tucking her hair behind her ear, you sigh in contentment. "you're so cute, you know that?" she shyly giggles at your compliment.

wrapping her arms around your waist, she pulls you into her embrace. "well you better go in before she comes back out." moving her hands from your waist to your neck, she brings you in and pecks your lips.

a stupid grin forms on the corner of your lip, "do it again." she laughs at your request. connecting your lips once again, it lasts longer this time. her hands explore your back, drawing you even closer. this is what you longed for.

"maybe i should stay for a bit," you whisper into the kiss. pulling away chuckling, she punches your shoulder. "shut up and go home."

opening the door, she finds eunchae waiting, mocking her with kissy faces. "omg eunchae! didn't i tell you to go to sleep?!" you can hear eunchae hysterically laughing on the other side as she makes a run for her room.

your girlfriend turns back to you, pinching the bridge of her nose. "ugh, kids..."

"text me when you get home and as soon as you wake up. i love you and drive safe. good night my lover girl~" peeking throught the small gap of her door she gives you a cheeky smile.

"i love you too. good night~" leaning in, you shut the door for her.