#for those unaware. for a while i was taking pictures of my friends (like from discord & instagram) and putting them in this image

[ashyslashyy]

[hannieehaee]

BAD HABIT

18+ / mdi

summary: hiding his secret crush on you was already hard enough for jungkook, and after getting bit by a spider, he'd now have the grueling task of hiding his brand-new superhero identity from you.

content: spiderman!jungkook, f2l!jungkook, based on mcu's spiderman and is supposed to take place during/after civil war but with an aged up spiderman, college-aged Jungkook and reader, picture tattoo-less 2019 jungkook, pining, slow burn-ish, afab reader, smut, dry humping, fingering, penetrative sex, etc.

wc: 9.4k

a/n: despite the spiderman aspect of it, this is just a cute little love story between two besties there's no angst or action here lol sorry</3

masterlist | kofi/patreon

support me through a one time tip<3

"Oh my God, did you see what he did last night?", you excitedly shoved your phone in Jungkook's direction, showing him yet another news article detailing Spiderman's newest act of bravery.

"What, did he stop another bank robbery?", Jungkook showed disinterest in your interruption, continuing to pay attention to what was playing on the TV.

"Okay, booo! Why are you so lame about him? He's so cool," you complained, setting your back against the couch again with a frown.

"I dunno," he shrugged, "Just don't see what the big deal is about him. There's cooler superheroes out there."

With the light from the TV shinning on the two of you, you allowed the content from the movie to consume you for a bit before arguing back. You always argued back when it came to Spiderman. This was practically routine to Jungkook by now.

"Like Iron Man? Sure, Tony Stark's cool, but think about it — Spiderman's probably just a regular person like you and me. Can you imagine doing all he does while keeping it all undercover?", you rambled on, "Also his body's crazy," you added as an afterthought, almost whispering it to yourself.

Jungkook couldn't help but chuckle at this, inadvertently looking down at his own abdomen before responding, "How do you know he's got a nice body under that suit?"

"You can literally see his abs through the suit! Duh!", you tutted at him as if he were an idiot to question you.

"Ah, right. My bad," he chuckled, "Okay, whatever. Just pay attention to the movie. You can ramble about him all you want after we finish, okay?," he held up his pinky towards you in a childish fashion, grinning when you giggled at him and intertwined your pinky with him, grumbling a 'fine' in mock annoyance.

Now with you both putting your focus on the movie, — Jungkook's all-time favorite, Back to the Future — Jungkook had the opportunity to lose himself to his own head, thinking about your recent obsession with Spiderman — New York's newest hero.

After Spiderman's recent appearance at an encounter with the Avengers in Germany, followed by a more prominent presence in the streets of New York with a revamped suit, you had instantly formed an intense interest in the masked man. Prior to that, the hero was mostly a man hidden in the shadows — a myth to all those in Queens. Almost immediately upon his return to New York he became a sensation across the world, but specially around the area in which he'd serve the people and fight all evil around.

Among all those fans stood you, maybe the biggest of them all.

It didn't take you long to develop a liking to the masked man upon his sudden resurgence. Jungkook had known you to get overly invested in your interests (there had been a few instances throughout your friendship where you'd demonstrated as such), but he never thought you'd be the type to develop such a blatant crush on someone you virtually knew nothing about. Past the fact that he was the youngest addition to the Avengers, there was not much information about Spiderman out to the general public, yet you were quite loud about your crush on him to everyone you knew — especially to Jungkook, who just so happened to be your best friend.

Unfortunately to Jungkook, you were entirely unaware that the man you were actually crushing on was your best friend in disguise.

And even more unfortunate to him, you were even more unaware of Jungkook's own crush on you.

Did this count? Were you technically crushing on Jungkook?

He chose to go for the most pesimistic answer and assume that your interest in Spiderman would immediately die upon finding out his real identity. Throughout your many years of knowing each other — all through the ups and downs of middle school and high school all the way to university — you'd never once shown anything but platonic interest in him.

To be fair, Jungkook also never gave you any clear indication of his feelings for you. He liked to think that he was discrete about it; that you had no idea of the embarrassing crush he'd been cultivating since freshman year of high school. Fortunately, you appeared to be far too oblivious to it, leaving Jungkook to hold not one but two life-altering secrets, never once considering letting you in on either of them.

For now, all Jungkook could do was make up lame excuses for his sudden absences and to grumble any time Spiderman's name was brought up. Part of him held disdain for Spiderman due to having to keep him a secret from you, but most of his dislike was born out of jealousy over your interest in him. What did he have that Jungkook didn't? Nothing! But he could never tell you that, leading him to a never-ending dilema that he could entrust in no one.

The movie left his mind for the next of the night, much more so when you seemed to become disinterested again, cuddling against him as you prepared to let yourself fall asleep. This was common in your relationship, though it was always strictly platonic. It always left Jungkook wanting more, but still content at having you by his side.

The next time you brought up Spiderman was the morning after. That night, you'd fallen asleep soon before the Back to the Future marathon ended, which was coincidentally the same time in which he usually went out to patrol the city looking for crime nearby. Leaving you comfy on his couch and cuddled against some of his plushies, he made his way out to check in on the city. That night was particularly calm, as he only prevented two street burglaries before making his way back to a still-sleeping you.

Naturally, he fell asleep next to you, only waking up the following morning when you'd woken him up by shaking his side, exclaiming something about some news you'd just seen online. Before even coming to his senses, he could already tell what you were so excited about. It was a conflicting feeling really, consisting of half cockiness and half annoyance. He felt pride at how impressed you were at his actions (despite not having knowledge that they were his), though he also felt annoyed that it was his secret identity who took credit for it.

With a yawn, he finally turned to you in order to entertain your insistence on raving about the masked man who'd been spotted once again last night.

"Oh my God! Jungkook, look! He stopped some burglars just a few streets over! Do you think he passed by here? — What if he climbed on our walls? That's so crazy," you went a mile a minute, "Fuck, I can't believe I slept through it," you pouted by the end of your rambles, practically huffing and puffing.

Once more, he couldn't help but chuckle at your antics. Despite his internal annoyance at the mere existence of Spiderman, he was also thankful his presence gave him a first row seat to how adorably infatuated you could get.

"Not like you could've met him anyways," but then he burst your bubble anyways.

"Stop! I could never meet him, I'd embarrass myself too badly. He's too cool for me anyways," you laughed to yourself, beginning to get up and taking some clothes from one of the drawers nearby, — Jungkook's apartment housed some of your clothes specifically for nights like these — heading over to the bathroom and presumably beginning to get dressed as soon as you were outside of his line of sight, not even bothering to close the door.

"Really? He could just be a loser under that costume," he commented, knowing it'd get under your skin.

Leaning back against the couch with his arms behind his head in a relaxed manner, he didn't even need his spidey reflexes to predict the shirt you threw his way in defiance due to his comment. He simply let it land on his chest, chuckling at your cute childishness.

"C'mon! You don't have to defend him from every little comment I make. He's a superhero, right? He's got tough skin," he whined at you, crumpling the shirt into a ball and tossing it into the clothes bin nearby with an expert precision.

Finally coming out of the restroom fully dressed, you grumbled at him as you ransacked his living room in search for your makeup bag, "You're just jealous of him," you hummed, disinterested in his complaints.

"Jealous? Of what? Not having to risk my life on a daily basis?"

Oh, how he wished that was the case sometimes.

"Spiderman must have so much game. Meanwhile, when was the last time you had a girlfriend?", you mocked him, finally spotting your makeup and sitting on the floor in front of his full length mirror in order to do your makeup.

Getting up, he sat on a beanbag nearby, watching you through the reflection with a scowl.

"M-me? Without game? You're the one crushing on a nameless man who probably doesn't even have a place to live! At least I have my bachelor pad — which, by the way, you stay at free of charge!", he rebutted, somewhat offended but not really. He just really needed to win this fight against himself.

"Please, I could totally pull him if we were in the same room for five minutes," you smirked at him through the reflection, somehow grooming your eyebrows to absolute perfection despite the current argument going on.

"You literally just said he was too cool for you," he recalled back.

"Under that suit, he's just a man. And I could pull any man."

Pull me, please! a desperate gremlin in his head practically whined as soon as you said the words.

With a shake of his head, he cleared his mind of that thought, "Okay, valid. So, you mean to tell me that you're just waiting for the chance to catch him alone? Is that why you haven't dated in months?", he genuinely wondered.

"Maybe," you mumbled, now moving onto your blush, one of Jungkook's favorite touches in your makeup regimen, "How about you? How come you haven't seriously dated a girl in years? Any secret crush I need to know about? I'm very open about mine," you dug in, unknowingly making Jungkook break a sweat at the questioning glare you sent him through the mirror before refocusing your gaze on yourself.

Facing Captain America and the Winter Soldier had made him less nervous than this very moment.

He squirmed in his seat a bit before managing to let out a credible response, "Just- just not into anyone these days," he lamely responded.

"Boo," you boo'd him, "That's lame. Maybe if you wingman me with Spidey I could help you out with some girl," you suggested.

"Yeah, maybe," and that was that for that subject.

After that, the subject wasn't brought up again for the rest of the day. You and Jungkook followed your usual plans, walking over to uni side by side as soon as you finished getting ready and spending any of your down time together. Unlike last night, you opted to head back to your own apartment for the night, leaving Jungkook to freely roam the city in disguise while you probably daydreamed about the guy he wasn't. He kept you in his mind for the rest of the day, sighing any time he remembered how easy it was for you to want to pair him off to another girl, knowing his feelings surely would never be mutual.

Unfortunately for Jungkook, it was extremely difficult for him to ignore your intense interest in Spiderman. His supersonic hearing would not allow him to do so anyway.

He wasn't really in the habit of getting into your private business. Despite his superhuman abilities, he had sworn to himself that he would never spy on you or use any of his newfound skills to ever insert himself in places of your life where he wasn't openly invited.

However ...

Okay, it's not like he meant to be so quiet when he came into your apartment. And it's not like you hadn't invited him beforehand. It was very likely that you wouldn't have minded him hearing the conversation you were currently having with your friend on the phone since it technically did not concern him, but he still couldn't help but feel guilty at being made privy of the details of it.

And the details were harsh to listen to — but not in a bad way.

His nails dug into the edge of the wall as he began making sense of what you were saying — of who you were talking about. His eyebrows furrowed, not sure if in annoyance or if in frustration. Your commentary simply had an unexpected effect on him.

"Oh my God, don't ask me that!," you giggled, scandalized at your phone, "I can't think of him that way, I like him too much. It feels almost disrespectful," you whispered the last bit, as if ashamed yet still giddy.

Without any context, the hopeless romantic side of Jungkook's brain might've allowed him to think you were talking about him. His bionic hearing could make out your friend's words on the other side of the phone perfectly, however, which proved to him that you were in fact speaking of someone else — kind of.

"What, you're talking about him all the time but you tell me you've never had any thoughts of fucking him?", your friend teased on the other aide of the call, causing you to whine in response.

"Of course I have!," you argued back, making Jungkook mentally wince at the thought, "Everyone and their mom knows I'm into him, of course it's not just some elementary school crush, dude. I want him," you put extra emphasis on your last statement.

"Tell me more," your friend pushed.

Jungkook could hear you shuffling in the sheets, likely kicking your feet around due to the giddy emotions thinking about your crush caused within you.

"There's nothing to tell ..." you murmured, avoidant.

"There is, c'mon! It's not like you can talk about this with Jungkook. He hates him," she reminded you, causing Jungkook to nod to himself from the other side of the wall.

"He doesn't hate him. I think he just finds my crush ... dumb," you responded. You were right. Well, kind of.

"Okay, I don't care about that. I wanna hear more about him. You said you were going to try and see him. Have you?", your friend continued to push.

This made Jungkook pause.

Would you actually go as far as to try and seek out Spiderman? How would you even find him?

"Well," you started, dragging out the vowel, "I caught a peak of him the other day — don't say anything!," you interrupted yourself, "Jungkook doesn't know, it just happened the other day. And he'll call me reckless or something."

"What'd you see?", your friend was clearly excited at the news, ecstatic to heat more. Jungkook was more so anxious to hear more. How had he not spotted you?

"I caught him in the middle of changing out of his suit ..." you whispered, as if someone could possibly be listening in — if only you knew.

"What?!," if your friend was excited, she was over the moon now.

"I saw him making his way through the city with his little webs and he stopped by near me. It was total luck, but I recognized the alley where he stopped and ran there," you recounted, "All I could see by the time I got there was a guy speed walking away from the alley while adjusting a black sweatshirt — it was obviously him! Even speed walking he was too fast for me," you finished with an intake of breath.

"So you're saying you saw his abs, basically," was all your friend responded.

"Stop!," you whined, "But yeah ... I might've gotten to see his happy trail ... He had a mask and beanie on, so I didn't catch his face at all," he could hear the pout on your face, "Not that I wanted to! I'd never wanna find him out without his permission. I just wanted to see him up close."

Jungkook believed this. He knew that you'd respect anyone's privacy, specially someone who you had grown certain affection for.

He was still shocked by this information, though. You'd spotted him? How had he not noticed you? And on top of it all, you'd almost caught him suit-less. A tiny, and frankly stupid, part of him felt a little cocky at knowing you'd seen him in action — at knowing you'd seen part of his body and liked it. His regular self was quite modest around you, not wanting to cross any boundaries nor cause you to feel liberal enough to walk around bare near his vicinity (his brain would just not he able to handle that). It was already hard enough for him to see you in those tiny little shorts and tank tops you'd wear to sleep during the summer. He hoped he had a similar effect on you, and knowing he somewhat had it made him feel like he was on top of the world.

And then your conversation continued.

"You should've followed him, you dumbass! Don't you wanna know where that happy trail leads?," your friend encouraged.

"As much as I'd love to get him in bed, I can't just stalk him! Iron Man's secret identity didn't last too long, we'll probably know who Spidey is within a few years and I'll be first in line to get to him," you giggled.

"What are you gonna do once you get to him?"

"Not to get nasty, but the first thing I'd do would be–"

That's when Jungkook stomped his feet and made his presence to you known, acting as if he'd just arrived. There was no way he'd be able to hear your thoughts and still be able to look you in the eye afterward.

"Y/N? You home?", he stealthily made his way back to the front door before calling out to you, surely interrupting your conversation.

"Shit, never mind, Kook's here. Gotta go," you said a quick goodbye to your friend before making your way to the living room and welcoming Jungkook.

"Kookie! I forgot you were coming," you walked over to him to give him a quick hug; your usual greeting.

"You should just assume I'm coming at any time," he mumbled into the hug, pulling away and immediately finding his rightful place on your couch, soon joined by you.

"So, what's new?", he turned to you with interest.

You cocked your head to the side in a questioning manner, "Nothing? You just saw me yesterday," you scoff.

"Nothing new with your spider boy?", he feigned disinterest.

"You never wanna hear about him. Why do you ask?"

"Maybe I want to be more supportive," he mumbled, avoiding eye contact.

From his peripheral he could tell you were looking at him with curiosity in your eyes, likely pondering about his change of heart. It took you a few seconds of silence before shrugging off his unusual interest and continuing the conversation.

"I might've spotted him the other day ...", now you were the one to mumble, looking down to avoid what you likely believed would be a judgmental reaction from him.

"R-really?", he scratched the back of his head, "Where? What'd you see?"

"Y'know, just him swinging around. Saw him heading home, I think. Then I lost track of him," you told him once you'd realized this wasn't some ruse to scold you for your interest again.

"What would you do if you actually met him someday?", he asked nonchalantly. Or at least as nonchalantly as he could manage while recalling the prior response he'd interrupted when you'd been talking to your friend.

Shrugging, you pressed your lips into a line as you pondered it for a bit, "I'd just tell him I'm his fan, I guess. I'd probably be too shy to even speak to him. It's like talking to your high school crush; you just avoid them as much as you can til it goes away," you chuckled to yourself.

He hummed, "Well, if the day ever comes, I think it'd be worth a try to talk to him. Maybe he'll like what he hears."

You nodded along, seemingly mulling over it inwardly, but saying nothing more regarding the matter. Jungkook joined you in dropping the subject, moving on to your usual movie night whilst also thinking over your sudden spotting of his masked self. It was odd to him how you'd somehow spotted him, but that was really the last thing on his mind. What concerned him the most was the sudden desire he felt to fulfill that need to see you while he was in his suit. He craved for you to return his feelings and there was a thoughtless side of him that wanted to get that reaction out of you, even if it meant you'd be reciprocating it to someone else.

Jungkook knew this was a stupid and reckless thing to do.

If Tony Stark were here in this moment, he'd probably take away the brand new suit he'd recently made for him. However, Jungkook was only 21, his hormones were still going crazy; crazy enough for him to make dumb and uncontrolled decisions just based off his feelings.

This was how he came to find himself pacing back and forth on the terrace of your apartment building whilst suited up. Muttering out loud to himself, he fought against himself as to whether or not he should go through with what had been bugging at him since speaking to you about your almost-encounter last week.

After mulling over it for a bit, he came to realize that there was no true harm to actually granting your wish of meeting Spiderman. He knew you to be a reasonable person (despite your claims of wanting to fuck Spiderman — who was a complete stranger to you) and felt reassured that you wouldn't put his identity at risk. On top of that, you had claimed that you probably wouldn't be able to even speak to him if you were to meet him.

The biggest issue was to come up with a reason as to why he'd be paying you a visit in particular. Maybe you were completely clueless as to your best friend's secret identity, but you weren't an idiot. His motives and identity would be immediately suspicious to you due to the strange nature of his apparition. Sure, he could hide his face and voice and even demeanor, but you'd be able to piece the pieces together too easily, anyone would.

Unluckily for him, this was not something he had to worry about for too long, as his plans did not go as smoothly as he had hoped. Just in between his nonsensical rambles to himself, there was an interruption orchestrated by you, with your sudden presence in the terrace throwing him completely off guard. Thank God he hadn't had a chance to take off his mask before you showed up.

"Oh my God," were your only words as you slowly made your way through the door leading to the terrace, choosing not to make your presence unknown.

"Shit," was his sole response, wincing from behind the mask.

"What- what are you doing here? Is it really you?", you asked, slowly making your way closer to his frozen self.

Attempting to switch over to his usual confident demeanor, Jungkook stood up straighter, hands on his hips as he waved over at you. The eyes displayed on his mask replicated his actual facial expression, squinting at you in a friendly manner as he tried to introduce himself in the least awkward way he could muster whilst deepening his voice in order to mask it.

"Hello! I- Yes, it's me! I- uh, was not expecting anyone to be here," he managed, walking over to you and giving you a handshake — something quite out of character for Spiderman, which he hoped you didn't pick up on.

Unfortunately, you did pick up on it, tilting your head to the side in curiosity before returning his handshake. From Jungkook's perspective, you seemed like a mixture of nerves, excitement and genuine curiosity. He couldn't blame you. Your idol/crush had suddenly showed up on the roof of your apartment and was nonchalantly trying to make acquaintances with you.

"I'm so sorry!," you suddenly chirped, letting go of his hand mid handshake, "I wasn't following you, I swear! I live downstairs and sometimes I come up here for air and I saw you and I thought it was you — and it is you! Wow, I- Fuck, hi. I'm Y/N, it's so nice to meet you," you rambled on and on, inflicting pain in Jungkook's heart at how adorable you were.

"Hi, again," he smiled under the mask, "It's fine, uh, this happens more than you may think," he lied, attempting to cover his tracks.

"Really? Do you get spotted a lot?", you wondered.

"It's not super rare, but it's usually while I'm on the run, not like, uh, like this. I was just resting for a bit," he went to casually lean against the railing next to him but pathetically slipping a bit and having to readjust his standing.

He cleared his throat, "So, I take it you're a fan?", he attempted to make conversation.

"I'm literally obsessed with you. I keep up with every article that comes out about you and any sighting of yours," you beamed before cringing to yourself, "Shit, I'm not playing it cool at all, am I?"

He couldn't help but chuckle, "No, you're good, trust me. Most people just scream and run away or ask me to do a backflip — which I can totally do, but it gets repetitive. Others attack me sometimes. It's rare to actually start conversation with me."

"Oh, so am I special, then?", you giggled, taking a few steps forward as you moved to lean on the railing next to him.

And just like that, you took the upper hand in the conversation. The mood shifted the moment you decided to start a flirtation with him, and Jungkook knew he was completely doomed.

Yes, you were absolutely special. Sure, he would occasionally interact with regular citizens of Queens, but he had never actually sought them out for conversation nor even entertained any fanatics of his. For you, however, he was willing to make an exception. God, he had been itching to do this from the moment he found out you had an infatuation with the superhero.

"Y- you- yeah," he cleared his throat, trying again, "You're the only person who hasn't alerted everyone around me of my presence," he regained his suave vibe by the end of the sentence.

"Why would I ever do that?", you pondered out loud, using a flirtatious tone Jungkook had never been on the receiving end of, "Then I wouldn't get to have you all for myself."

Were you closer? Had you moved closer in proximity? He could swear that the distance had lessened from just a few moments ago. This wasn't good, but it was also great.

"O-oh? That's ... Yes, hah, thank you for not exposing me," was all he managed to say. Fuck, his usual wit and ability to banter under the guise of being Spiderman seemingly dissipated when it came to interacting with you.

You giggled at him, likely taking note of how easy it was to fluster him. Jungkook knew you were aware of how attractive you were, also having the ability you turn up the charm whenever you so wished — except he had never dealt with it firsthand. It was both exhilarating and nerve wracking at the same time. He had truly not prepared for this.

"It's no problem," you smiled at him with a hint of something else in your eye, "Since you're such a good guy, y'know, maybe you'd like to return the favor?", you tilted your head at him, lifting your eyebrows suggestively.

"R-repay? How would you suggest?", he managed to regain some of his confidence, now leaning his body a bit more towards your own, smiling under his mask as he attempted to keep his heart rate normal.

"I'm sure you're super busy saving the world and all that, but maybe you'd like to visit again? No one ever comes up here, so it'd just be the two of us," you suggested, biting your lip in anticipation. Despite your confidence, Jungkook could still hear the rapid thumping of your heart — you were nervous about shooting your shot with a certain superhero; understandably so.

He decided to take advantage of the newfound realization that you might've been just as nervous as he was, clearing his throat and ensuring he didn't stutter this time around, "That'd be unfair, though, wouldn't it? To show you favoritism over all my other fans?", he said in flirtatious jest, hoping you caught on.

A pout far too enticing for Jungkook made its way to your lips, "But you just said I was special?", your hand went up to his chest, finger tracing the spider symbol on it.

"I never said that, you did," you couldn't see the teasing grin on his face, but it was there to stay.

"Oh?", you feigned offense, "So you don't think I'm special? Wow, now you really do owe me."

"You're right. Wouldn't want any unhappy citizens in Queens when I can help it," he agreed, taking hold of your wrist and tracing the back of it.

You smiled to yourself then, letting air out through your nose before looking back up at him, "I really do mean it. If you ever need a place to lay low, you can always come," you paused, "And ... If you ever want company, I'm just downstairs," you suggested.

Biting his lips from behind the mask, he nodded, letting go of your hand, "Yeah, I'll take that in mind," he checked his wrist despite there being no watch there, pulling a chuckle from you, "Unfortunately, I have to get back to patrolling now, but I'll see you around?", he asked as he climbed up the ledge of your building, ready to swing away.

"That's up to you, Spiderman," were the last words you said, though they were spoken with a confidence that told him you knew he'd be coming back.

Within just a month, Jungkook had lost count of the times he'd coincidentally found himself on your roof, always showing up at a similar time as that of your first encounter.

At first he played it off as a coincidence, cheekily claiming that he was just passing by and needed some rest. Other times, he'd show up due to legitimate exhaustion as he sought you out for comfort. It was very quick that you began a genuine friendship with one another, having an unspoken agreement of seeing each other there a few times a week late into the afternoon.

The flirtation was still present, but a friendship between you overtook that. This made Jungkook glad in a sense, as he knew he would've felt guilty if anything romantic ever came up without you knowing his real identity. He already felt badly about befriending you without your knowledge, but he felt like he was too late to back out now.

Today was yet another day in which he decided to show up, though this time a little later. Since you lived at the highest floor of your building, his mere presence on the roof was enough to alert you of his arrival, causing you to walk through the door leading to the staircase just moments later.

You were in your pajamas — just some small shorts and a tank top, but it was enough for his eyes to bug out of his head (figuratively, of course). Any time he'd stay over with you, you'd usually opt for a shirt long enough to cover halfway through your thighs, but since Jungkook wasn't present tonight it seemed like you'd chosen a tank top tight enough it'd give him the perfect view of your nipples peaking through the fabric. It bugged him to think you were doing this for Spiderman and not Jungkook, but he was too distracted by the sight of you to mind it too much.

"Hey," you greeted him as you headed his way, "A little late today, huh?"

"Yeah, uh, I was busy with a robbery," he explained, leaning against the veranda as you joined next to him.

"Oh? That sounds dangerous? Are you hurt? Maybe I should take a look?", your hand went up to his chest, pretending to check for injuries.

He laughed and you joined him, biting his lip under the mask, "You're even more dangerous than any bad guy out there, you know that?", he grabbed your wrist and took your hand off his chest, opting to shyly hold onto it instead.

"Me? I'm not the masked man showing up at an unsuspecting girl's apartment in the middle of the night," you teased, hand playing with his own.

"I thought I wouldn't be a stranger by now. We've been meeting for what, a month now? I'd say that's enough to get to know a person," he reasoned.

"Hmm," you pretended to mull over it, "Does that mean there's no chance you'll let me see what's under that mask?", you pouted at him.

This was not the first time you teased him about his secret identity, often bugging him (in a way far too entertaining for him to be actually bugged by it) to let you in on his secret. You swore up and down you'd never tell, offering up your pinky to intertwine with his. Jungkook liked you so much that there were various instances in which he had to catch himself before he ended up agreeing with your request.

"You know I can't do that, gorgeous," it was his turn to flirt. To be fair, as Spiderman, he did have a flirtatious streak to his personality. You weren't the only one on the receiving end of it, but you sure were the only one he meant it with. You also always giggled or blushed when he turned up the charm, which always instigated him into doing it more and more.

"But you said I was special," you reminded him with a smile, "And! We've been meeting for a while. Don't you wanna trust at least one person with your identity? Y'know, if something were to happen to you," even Jungkook could tell you were pulling your reasoning out of your ass, but he couldn't help but feel endeared by you.

Before he could fire back with an equally cheeky response, you interrupted him again, "How about you let me see you some other way?"

He cocked his head to the side with curiosity, unknowing of what you meant.

Hesitantly, your hand let go of his, now engulfing it with both of your hands. Your fingers traced his hands through his gloves, looking up at him for a moment to seek permission for what you were going to go next. Silently, he offered you a nod, allowing you to take off his gloves.

Jungkook couldn't help but feel slightly scared that you might recognize his hands, but finding no reaction in your eyes or heart rate (which he could hear perfectly any time he neared you), he felt calm. Your hands traced his own bare ones, eventually holding them in your own. The entirety of the interaction was soft and intimate in a way Jungkook had never experienced.

"Can I see more?", you asked after a while, voice almost a whisper.

"What- what would you like to see?", he whispered back, gulping at how close to you he suddenly felt.

Once more, your hand silently went up to touch him, but this time it reached his chest, laying flat against it before slowly finding the opening in the middle, allowing you to peek at a sliver of his bare chest. Without hesitation, Jungkook grabbed onto your hands on his chest and helped you open his body suit a little more, just enough to reveal his chest.

Your hands softly traced at a few cuts and bruises found there, pouting to yourself as you stared at the firm muscle under your hands. Silence engulfed you for a few moments as he enjoyed your affections.

"Well, this seems kinda unfair," he started with a quiet voice, "You're getting me naked, feeling me up. Making me feel like a piece of meat," he joked.

You stifled a chuckle, "Don't think I didn't notice you looking at my boobs when I got here, you perv. I'm just getting my payback," your hands went back to his hands, taking them in your own.

He gaped at you from under his mask, "I- I would never!", he rasped out, "The fact that you would even accuse me of that- I- I am appalled, Y/N Y/L/N," he gave you an exaggerated gasp.

"Okay, whatever," you rolled your eyes, "Can I keep going now?", you asked as you went back to tracing his suit with your hands, this time reaching up to his neck.

You wrapped your arms around the back of his neck, pulling him closer as you stared up at him. He knew that all you could see was the comically large eyes featured on his mask, but he was still affected by the look on your face. Your mouth was agape and your eyes kept going down to where you knew his lips would be. Without being able to help himself, his hands wrapped around your waist, feeling the sliver of skin between your shorts and your tank top. In all your years of friendship, Jungkook had never been able to hold you like this. It was exhilarating.

There was no need for any words as your hands found his mask, lifting it up to uncover his lips and lay right below his nose. Jungkook knew he should've been more careful in letting anyone — even you — even make contact with his mask, but his eyes had been trained on your lips from the moment you got your hands on him. His mind was in another planet at the moment.

There was, again, no reaction from you that could've led Jungkook to believe you had recognized him. Was the shape of his lips not obvious enough? Were you too distracted to notice? It truly made no sense to him, but the proximity of your lips had him too distracted to think about it too much.

That was when the moment Jungkook had been waiting for for years finally came to fruition. Your lips made contact with his own, very tentative and shy in their movements. Mere seconds happened until he opened his mouth to deepen the kiss as he held you against him.

It was a bit awkward due to the obstacle the mask proved itself to be, but Jungkook didn't care. He was far too drunk in you to consider anything around him, specially when the kiss grew heated within moments. Pressing you up against the veranda, Jungkook let out all pent up need against tour mouth, hoping in the back of his mind that you wouldn't realize it was him you were kissing.

Sadly, it all ended before Jungkook could really lose himself in it. You pulled away with a giggle at the way his body insisted on following yours, attempting to trap you in another kiss. He couldn't help but chuckle back, still not letting go of you.

"Hmm, ever let any of your other fans go that far?", you hummed when he buried his face on the crook of your neck, pressing shy kisses on the bare skin.

"N-no, just you," he muttered, pulling back to readjust his suit, now covering himself back up.

"Boo," you complained once he was completely covered up again, crossing your arms petulantly, "What, time for you to go?"

"Sadly, yes. I'm a busy man, pretty. Need to get back out there to ensure pretty girls like you remain safe," he coo'd at you jokingly, pinching your nose adoringly before beginning to climb the veranda in order to leave.

"You know this isn't a one-time thing, right?", you called from below him.

"Oh, I'll make sure it's not, baby," he chuckled before saluting you as he jumped down, disappearing from your view almost immediately.

He arrived home soon after that, too giddy to even consider patrolling that night. The smile wouldn't leave his face, and his skin was covered in goosebumps. He felt like such a teenager at the excitement cruising through him, but the remnants of the feeling of your mouth on his simply wouldn't leave him.

He knew that sooner or later he'd have to tell you about who he was, but he wanted to enjoy your newfound relationship as much as he could. So far, you hadn't told him about your frequent encounters with Spiderman, which led him to believe you felt the same way. Clearly you wanted to keep him as your own little secret, which only made him the giddier about it all.

There were occasions in which Jungkook simply didn't plan things out to well. Today was one of those days.

Having no one aware of his identity proved to be more bothersome than he had first assumed. Sure, he could lie about his location to his friends and family with ease, keep any troubling encounters with criminals to himself, but it was the aftermath of these encounters that sometimes came to be too much for him to handle.

He had been reckless tonight, somehow miscalculating every single one of his moves when taking down a crew of armed robbers. He hadn't even meant to come across them nor fight them on his own (Tony Stark had warned him about this before), but it's not like he could've walked away without at least attempting to deal with the situation.

In the end, he was victorious, and his current state proved as much. It was not a simple fight, resulting in his suit getting mangled all over, with many of the injuries penetrating into his actual skin.

Battered and covered in bruises and scratches all over, Jungkook had no idea where to go. This was one of the first times in which Jungkook found himself limping and unknowing of how to patch himself up before the sun rose. His plan had been poor, which only reminded him what a stupid decision it was to try and handle the situation on his own rather than to leave it up to the police.

But his terrible planning skills did not stop there. They evolved into finding himself standing on the fire escape that led directly to your apartment. With his arms holding onto his sides to try and alleviate the pain, he reached out to knock on your window, hoping 2AM wasn't too late for you to come find him.

It was only moments when you showed up in your pajamas, a shocked yet worried look on your face as you opened up your fire escape entrance to him.

"Oh my God, what happened?", you asked whilst ushering him in, providing him with support so he could make it over to your room and lay on your bed.

"You should see the other guy," he rasped, coughing out.

"Stop! Fuck, how can I help you? What do you need?", you frantically went over to your restroom, returning with a makeshift first aid kit.

You sat next to him on the bed, helping him sit up so you could check out his injuries. His suit had multiple scratches that revealed slivers of his skin, but there was nothing you hadn't seen the previous time he had been over.

"It was just a robbery gone wrong. Nothing to worry about," he finally said, wincing when you began to open up his suit to better check his injuries. Your hands immediately went to try and take care of the cuts on his stomach, moving anything out of the way in order to reach them.

"You idiot," you muttered, "This is gonna hurt, okay? Just breathe deep," you warned before moving on to dab on his injuries with some ointment. Hissing at the burn, his stomach hardened, causing him to recoil a bit.

"Jungkook, be still," you hissed back at him, scoffing when he suddenly stilled at the mention of his name.

"W-what? What did you just say?",

You paid him no mind, still putting all your focus in his injuries, "Do you think I'm dumb, Jungkook? You show up to hang out with me and let me feel you up and you think I won't recognize you? You really are an idiot," you chuckled by the end.

"You- you knew?! This whole time?", he gaped at you, throwing off his mask as he groaned at the way you blatantly laughed at his shock, "God, you suck."

"C'mon, Jungkook. You're a horrible liar. And I'm your best friend, you can't hide anything from me."

"Whatever," he huffs, followed by a wince from your manhandling of his injuries, "You could've told me," he muttered petulantly.

You finally looked back at him, with a stern look in your eyes Jungkook only ever saw whenever you were about to tell him off, "Oh, like you told me? Dude, you were more than fine pretending not to know me," you jabbed at him, "Dickhead," you muttered once you were done.

It was his time to chuckle, jabbing at your leg with his own and smirking when you pushed back.

"So, is this you admitting you've wanted to fuck me all this years?"

You scoffed, "Me? I wanted to fuck Spiderman. Not my fault it turned out to be you," you argued as you wrapped some bandages on the cuts found alonh his torso, "You're the one who came after me cause you wanted to fuck me."

"Okay, fine," he relented, patting at the wraps you'd just secured on him, "What's the verdict now? Still want to fuck me?", he leaned in with a smirk, smirk growing even bigger at your playful scowl.

"Shut up and come here," you practically growled at him, pulling him to you by his shoulders and catching him in a kiss.

It was almost effortless the way in which Jungkook pushed you back on the bed, easily climbing on top of you as he kissed you. His hand was on your back as he lowered your body to lay flat on the bed, ignoring any injury he may have had. Everything left his mind as he kissed you — the burglary, the secret he thought he had been keeping from you, the relief you now knew; everything.

"Kook," you sighed when his lips reached the length of your neck, softly nibbling at your skin every so often.

"You're so bad," he murmured, "Lying to me this whole time ... Making me look like an idiot while I tried to keep my secret from you," he reprimanded with a love bite.

"You're the idiot who- oh," your complaint was interrupted by the sudden presence of his hands on your breasts, feeling at your nipples through the thin barrier of your tank top.

"Shh, baby. You may have had the upper hand all these years, but now I'm in charge," he shushed you, "Never looked my way, but kept tryna get in my pants as Spidey? Bad, bad girl," he murmured as his lips came closer and closer to your chest, eventually reaching your nipples and wrapping his mouth around the clothed skin, engulfing the cloth with his saliva as he abused your nipple with his teeth.

You writhed under him, both frustrated at the barrier and affected by the stimulation, "Hmm, and you're good at dealing with the bad guys, right, Kookie?", you murmured, already delirious with his touch.

In the meantime, his hands went up to your breasts, lifting up the shirt and smoothly managing to throw it off before his hands went right back to playing with your tits.

"Oh, yeah. Gonna take care of you, baby. Gonna fuck all the bad out of you," he sighed at the sight of your nude torso, hips unable to help themselves in beginning to grind against you.

He trapped you under him, using you for his own pleasure. However, if your moans were anything to go by, he had a great idea of his current effect on you. Holding you down, he kissed you up and down, going from your breasts to your lips all while his hips danced with your own. At some point his hands snuck down to help you pull off your shorts and panties low enough to give him access to you. By now, you were basically completely nude while he remained in his scratched up suit. Seemed unfair, but it worked for Jungkook.

With curious hands, he reached down to your bare cunt, beginning to finger his way to your clit. His thumb found it with a swiftness you could only expect from a man like Jungkook. Synchronizing his hand and hips, he ground down on you while thumbing at the puffy pearl between your legs.

"Right there, huh?", he murmured at your increasingly high-pitched sighs, "That's where you need it, huh, baby?"

Warm eyes stared down at yours, eyebrows furrowed in concentration as he worked you all the way to your peak. Not a single part of him was occupied with anything but you — his lips tended to your own, his hand to your clit, his hips to your cunt, he was consumed by you whilst consuming you himself.

All his senses were heightened. His superhuman hearing allowed him to take in every noise of wetness coming south and every cry coming north. He could smell you perfectly, which only added to the delirious feeling you always provoked in him.

"I- Kookie, I'm gonna cum ... Keep going, I'm almost there, fuck," you cried as his movements sped up. Unbeknownst to you, he let out a sigh of relief at realizing your orgasm would come before his own. He was bursting inside his suit, almost ready to pounce you.

"Yeah? Cum for me, pretty. Need you to cum for me, okay? Promise I'll ... I'll fuck the bad out of you right after," he swore, lips finding their way to your ear as he whispered words of encouragement to you.

With a desperate nod, you continued to cry out his name, hands finding his bicep for support as you let yourself go. Jungkook took in every sound, every move, every single reaction coming from you. He memorized every bit of your orgasm and let himself be ruined by it.

Upon the crescendo of your orgasm, wet sounds filled up the room once more as his lips made their rightful way to yours once again. He sighed praise into your lips, calling you his good girl and his dream, claiming you to be the greatest reward he could ever receive.

"Thought I was bad, Kook? What happened to that?", you teased him, beginning to slowly rip off his suit in order to get him equally as nude as yourself.

"Baby, shut up. Just let me fuck you," he scolded, annoyed your words were interrupting his kisses.

"Hmm, do superheroes need condoms, or are you going in raw?", you asked so casually it made Jungkook's grip on you tighten involuntarily.

"Don't talk like that, fuck, I'll cum," he winced before backtracking with wide eyes, "Shit, wait. You'd let me do it raw?", he gaped at you, interrupting the kiss.

You laughed at him, giving him a single peck, "Course, Kook. Trust you more than anyone," you said, sharing the first moment of pure softness of the night.

Jungkook loved how easy it was for you to share friendly banter and bug at each other even under this context, but he couldn't lie when he said he adored those moments of unadulterated adoration you'd share any time you looked up at him while he was Spiderman. This was reminiscent of those moments, but so much better — especially being now aware that every single one of those looks had been directed at Jungkook, not Spiderman.

"Yeah?," he smiled at you, intertwining your fingers above your head, "Trust you too, beautiful," he let go of one of your hands to line himself up, groaning as he traced his tip up and down your folds before finally entering you.

"God, Kook," you sighed, arching your back at the feeling.

"I know, fuck," he matched your tone, burying his face in your neck while he gave you some time to get used to him, "Let me know when I can move, okay, baby? Feel so fucking good already."

You nodded wordlessly, using your free hand to dig your nails on the skin of his back. After about a minute you gave him the green light to move, dragging your nails down his back when he began to thrust, slowly building up his speed snd intensity.

"That feel good, pretty?", he murmured into your ear.

"Mhm!", you practically whined, attempting to move your hips to his rhythm, "D-don't stop."

Unburying himself from the crook of your neck, his hands went to your face to make you look into his eyes. He looked at you silently for a few moments with softness in his eyes, proceeding to locking your lips in a kiss as he continued to fuck into you. It was all very intense yet it carried an air of intimacy Jungkook knew he would never be able to replicate.

"Tell me you're almost there, shit. 'm gonna cum soon, pretty," he warned, thrusts accelerating in both speed and intensity.

"Yes! Almost there, just- keep going," you whined, hands reaching his hips to further encourage his movements. Wrapping your legs tighter around him, your body took control and did its best to follow his movements, making Jungkook's orgasm even more imminent.

"Think I can count you down?" he grumbled, eyebrows furrowed and demonstrating the amount of restraint in him at the moment.

"Yes, c-count me down," you nodded aggressively.

"Kay, pretty. Cum with me, yeah? In three," his hand went to toy at your clit once more, making you hiss in pleasure, "two ..." his hips readjusted to hit at that one spongey spot he'd been ramming at, but now harder, "one," he groaned the last word, almost falling limp against you as his movements stilled.

He could feel himself emptying inside you, kissing at your skin endlessly at how intimate the act felt. Meanwhile, you mewled nonstop under him, not helping his situation at all. He felt as if life halted for a moment, with everything aligning perfectly as he enjoyed both his and your orgasm.

"God ... Fuck, I can't believe it took us this long to do that," he sighed when it was all said and done.

You pushed at him, making him remove his weight off you and lay beside you, staring up at the ceiling just like you, "You're the dumbass who wouldn't tell me you liked me," you huffed.

"Well, if I'm that much of a dumbass, why did you never tell me you knew who I was- Which, by the way! How long have you known?", he was still fairly breathless, but entirely too curious.

You took a pause to laugh at him for a moment, only stopping when he gave you a menacing stare, "Since the first day you came to see me," you started, "You moved and talked just like Jungkook, and it made no sense for you to come see me out of all people," you revealed.

His body turned to its side, arm reaching out to make you cuddle against him, "Why didn't you say anything?", he pouted.

"I don't know," you shrugged, "Wanted you to tell me about your identity on your own. Not my fault you're too dumb," you murmured that last part."

"Okay, whatever. You're my Spidey girlfriend now anyway, so it doesn't matter anymore," he huffed.

"Oh? I don't recall anyone asking me to be their 'Spidey girlfriend,' do you?"

"Fine," he groaned, "Give me ten minutes and I'll give you a full-on confession of love, okay?"

"Can't wait," you laughed.

to read short 1.3k word continuation (+ all other previously written bonus content) you can go join my jk monthly tier on kofi or patreon!

content: smut, afab reader, dry humping, teasing, penetrative sex, etc.

wc: 212 (teaser); 1308 (full drabble)

sneak peak:

"You're the vain of my existence, you know that, right?", you groaned at Jungkook's sudden presence on your fire escape.

"Is that how you talk to your boyfriend? I spend all day fighting evil and come back to nothing but disrespect," he complained jokingly, making his way into your room as if he owned the place.

"Boyfriend? Last I remember, I'm dating Spiderman, not Jeon Jungkook. Jeon Jungkook never asked me out," you trailed behind him, guiding him to take a seat in your couch.

"That joke's getting so old," he boo'd at you, "Plus, I literally have the suit on. Should I put on the mask? Is my face that ugly?" he continued his complaints, taking a seat on your couch and pulling you towards him, his inhuman strength managing to get you straddling him with minimal effort.

"No," you coo'd, "I like Jungkook's face just fine," your hands went to play with his hair, kissing at his cheek softly, "So, who were the bad guys today? Robbers? Bullies?"

"Nothing much today, just some guy stealing a bike and then a lost cat," he mumbled, "Still spent most of the day patrolling, though," he said as he buried his face in your chest, allowing you complete access to playing with his hair.

...

find the 18+ continuation on kofi or patreon!

if you have trouble finding it on there, just let me know!!<3

[natashashill]

mama’s girl

pairing: perv neighbor!agatha x reader

word count: 4.5k

warnings: 18+ kinda dun-con, manipulation, pervy acts: stealing underwear and hidden camera, guided masturbation, guided a lot of things actually, lots of titty sucking (& play), pussy eating & fingering, orgasm control, bondage, marking, possessive agatha, edging, age gap, & stalking lmk if i missed anything

a/n: this is definitely a dark fic so read at your own risk! also just a reminder that my page is not for minors <3

summary: you introduced yourself to your new neighbor and she takes a liking to you

You had moved into a new apartment after graduating college, and decided to introduce yourself to people living across the hall. You were absolutely thrilled when the door opened, and an older brunette woman opened the door. All thoughts of yours went out the window as she greeted you hello.

“Hi- Hi! I’m Y/N, I just moved in across the hall and I just wanted to introduce myself. I- uh made you some cookies as a sign of good faith. I’m trying to make some friends or uh at least friendly faces. Umm yeah so if you ever need anything I’ll be across the hall.”

“Thank you very much sweetheart. That’s quite a sweet gesture hun. Why don’t I tell you what, why don’t we do dinner sometime together? Would that be okay with you sweetness?”

“Yes! We can do dinner at mine this Friday at 7 if that works, I’ve been meaning to try out a few recipes if that’s okay with you.”

“Perfectly fine, I’ll see you on Friday honey.”

You giddly skipped back to your room, unaware of the thoughts swirling in Agatha’s head. You had made quite the impression on her. After you left, Agatha had to take quite a few breaths after seeing you. You were such a sweet and innocent sight, and she just had to have you for herself. She couldn’t wait for Friday, she had the perfect opportunity to start leaving her claim on you. She took a bite out of your cookie, and fuck, she couldn’t wait for Friday. 

The rest of the week dragged around slowly for both of you. You couldn’t shake your hot neighbor out of your head, although you felt guilty for crushing on her. Opposingly, Agatha has been keeping tabs on you, she’s found where you work and found your socials online. She spent a significantly long time through your Instagram, enjoying herself while discovering the bikini pics you’ve posted from your last vacation.

When it’s time to head over on Friday, she carries a larger than necessary bag. You let her inside, your stomach swirling at the sight of her dressed up. She greets you with a hug and a kiss on each cheek, and your breath catches in your throat. She hands you a bottle of wine she brought over, and you hurriedly rush into the kitchen to break it open. She uses this opportunity to take a look around your house, finding her way into the bedroom. She immediately starts on pulling out the secret camera she brought, placing it onto one of your picture frames facing your bed. Making sure you didn’t come back, she starts going through your drawers until she finds your underwear drawer, digging through and grabbing a few to take home. She stuffs them into her purse and starts to take a look around your room, observing all the decorations you have up. 

You walk into your room and see her observing a picture of yours.

“Agatha? What are you doing in here?”

“Oh sweetheart, forgive me. I was trying to find your bathroom to freshen up and came in here instead. I saw these adorable pictures and got distracted.”

A small blush forms at your cheeks at her comments and you guide her back towards your living room. She flashes you a grateful smile at the glass of wine and you can feel yourself falling for her with every passing moment. Dinner went smoothly, and you sighed in relief when Agatha showed signs that she enjoyed your food. She moaned out in delight at your cooking, and your cheeks flushed even further when your mind thought of where else she would make those noises. Dessert continued to be a success and she thanked you for the beautiful meal. 

You both talk for quite a bit that night, Agatha trying to find out anything she could about you. You found it sweet how Agatha took so much interest in you, asking you many questions about your life. You answered her questions honestly and started rambling about your life to her. Agatha looked at you so sweetly but there was something in her eyes that you couldn’t place. You brushed it off, blaming it on the wine. Agatha’s delighted at all the information you gave for her including that you’re single, you started a new job as a receptionist, and you’ve just moved here away from most of your friends and family. The night goes swimmingly with both of you laughing and chatting about work and it’s past midnight when Agatha leaves your apartment. She heads straight to the bedroom, not bothering to take off her shoes before unzipping her dress and taking one of your panties out of her bag. 

She starts to grind against your panties, the lace feeling heavenly against her clit as she moans out your name. The thoughts of you tonight flashing your precious eyes at her takes her over the edge, and she collapses against her bed, she decides she’ll clean up tomorrow.

She runs into you tomorrow while you’re about to leave your apartment, finding you dressed up in a tight dress and some heels.

“Oh, hi Agatha. I’m headed out for a date right now. This girl asked me out today while I was getting my coffee. I have to go now but I’ll see you around. We should grab dinner sometime, I’ll text you!”

Agatha bids you goodbye, wishing you good luck before entering her place and heading straight to the bedroom. She fishes out another pair of panties of yours and puts it on while grabbing a vibrator and placing over her clothed clit, grinding and bucking as her juices leaked out and into your panties. She pulls out her phone and opens the app connected to the camera in your room. She scrolls back to the footage from earlier today, watching you get ready. She nearly came as soon as she saw you, but took her time as she watched you get ready, enjoying the way your precious body looked. Her orgasm fell over her in waves, desperation rolled over her as she had to have you. 

The next time you both get together, Agatha makes sure to dress to get your attention. She knows that you have a small crush on her, but she needs you desperate for her. It seemed to have worked, as Agatha noticed your eyes on her the entire night, even stuttering over your words a little when she decided to hold eye contact with you. Your heart nearly stopped when she went to wipe a food stain near your lips, licking her finger before gently wiping it off. She pats your cheek before she heads back to your seat, and she knows she has you hooked. 

“So honey, how’s everything going with you? Anyone you’ve been intimate with recently? You’ve been going on quite a few dates.”

Your face heats up at her question and you just duck your head out of embarrassment. You’ve never actually had sex with someone before and you were sure Agatha would laugh at you, obviously she was expecting to share and reflect on details of both of your sex lives. You look up at her sheepishly and she tilts her head curiously.

“I- uh well, I’ve never actually had sex with someone. It sounds stupid but I’ve never found someone to do it with and I’m too scared I’ll be bad at it now.”

“Oh sweetheart, you poor thing. Let me help you sweetheart. I’ll teach you all you need to know and show you exactly what it feels like.”

“You would do that for me? I wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable, you’re probably not interested in a girl like me.”

“Nonsense sweetheart. I’ll help a sweet thing like you out. We can start off with weekly lessons and adjust as needed, we can do them on Fridays, right around this time. Here, why don’t we just get started right now. I want you to undress for me sweetheart while making eye contact, and take your time with it.”

You followed her directions exactly, locking eyes with her while slowly lifting your shirt up. At the pleased smile on her face, you shimmy out of your jeans, leaving you half-naked under her gaze. 

“Very good sweetheart, now why don’t you take off your bra for me. We’ll start easy for today, only playing with your boobs. A very important rule I have sweetheart, is that you will not touch yourself unless I give you permission, do you understand me? I don’t want you to explore by yourself sweetheart, you might hurt yourself.”

You nodded while undoing the clasp for the bra, letting your perky boobs show. 

“Very good darling, now I want you to hold them and move them around slowly, and see how it feels.”

“Feels good.”

“Oh and one more thing sweetheart, you’re going to start addressing me as mommy from now on, understand?”

“Yes.”

“Yes what?”

“Yes mommy, I understand.”

“Good girl, go ahead and squeeze them for me. Take your time and squeeze.”

You were a bit confused and tried to squeeze them but it didn’t feel right. 

“Here honey, let me help you. Just hold your tits up for me sweetheart, I’ll show you how to pleasure yourself.”

You feel a certain wetness as she walks over to you and grabs both of your tits with your hands. You let her squeeze and grab and pull as she wanted, the pleasure clouding over your brain. 

“Now sweetheart, I’m going to lick your nipples okay? I promise you’re going to feel so good baby, let mommy show you.”

You nodded and she brings her mouth to your left tit, engulfing your perked up nipple. You let out a small moan when you feel her start to suck. You can feel her smirk and chuckle around your nipple and let out a small apology. 

“No need sweetheart. Moan as loud as you want for me baby, I wanna hear those pretty noises coming out of your mouth.”

With that she switches over to your right nipple, giving just as much attention as she gave your left. You let out breathy moans for her and she starts to suck even harder. She guides you to lay down on the sofa while worshipping your breasts, making sure you’d be thinking about her for the next week.

She pulls away from your tits, a trail of saliva connecting her mouth to you before she eagerly connects your lips. She moans into the kiss as she sucks at your bottom lip, and you open your mouth letting her inside. She completely dominates the kiss and it turns you fuzzy. You kiss back passionately, trying to please her the best you could. She doesn’t let you breathe, too focused on claiming your lips. She eventually pulls away, pupils dilated and breath heavy. 

“Baby, it’s your turn now. I want you to practice what you just learned, okay? Practice on mama sweetheart.”

Agatha pulls down her zipper and exposes her tits to you, she had omitted her bra for the night. She guided your head to one of her nipples, and you eagerly latched on. You loved this position, being so close to Agatha had your mind blanking. The only thing you could think about was staying close to Agatha, your hands roaming her tits, exploring and playing as you eagerly continued sucking on Agatha. You switched your mouth over to her other nipples and renewed sucking, moaning at the action. Agatha couldn’t believe her luck, how easily you fell into her, and how much you loved this. It would be so easy to just have you spread your legs apart and let Agatha finger you have you fall apart on her lap. The thought had her mind reeling and she realized it was time to cut it off for the night, before she couldn't control herself anymore. 

When she pulls you away, you look up at her pouting, eager to go back to what you were doing. Agatha tells you it’s enough for the first lesson, and we can carry on next week. She gently cups your cheek before kissing you goodbye. You stand up with her, putting on your bra before seeing her out the door. You give a small wave goodbye before heading into bed, your mind running blank at the events of the evening. The rest of the week went no better for you, you could barely focus on work, only thinking about the next time you would see Agatha. 

Agatha was seeming to handle the gap a lot better than you, using your lacy underwear and her toys to get herself while thinking of how easily you trusted her to touch you. She couldn’t wait for your lesson this week.

When Friday rolled around, you put on your prettiest set of lingerie, hoping it would impress Agatha. You were a skimpy dress, one that would be easier for Agatha. You had everything perfectly set up for when she arrived, and now you were just waiting for her to knock on your door. See Agatha wanted to fuck with you a bit, she knew that you’d be so eager and pliant for her, but she had to keep you just as desperate for her. She purposely arrived a few minutes late, knowing your brain would be just that much happier to see her. 

You welcomed her with a hug before moving back to the couch, waiting for her next move. You were surprised to see her sit so close to you, but you weren’t complaining when you saw the low cut top she was wearing again. 

“Now sweetheart, today’s lesson is going to be very up close and personal. I need you to trust mommy to show you what to do and let mommy make the best decisions for you, alright? As a reward, if you’re good for mama, I’ll let you play with mama’s nipples again. You be good for me and you can play again since you liked that so much.”

“Yes, mommy. I’ll be good for you.”

“That’s my girl, let’s get you out of this dress hm?” When Agatha saw what you wore underneath your dress, she was in disbelief. She couldn’t believe that you were trying to seduce her, “What’s this sweetheart? You were trying to get mommy all worked up hm? Did you think this would help you?”

“No- no mommy. I just wanted you to like me and I thought you would like it if I wore something pretty.”

Agatha smiled at you, of course you had just wanted to please her, you were her innocent girl after all.

“Alright sweetheart, I’m going to remove your panties now. I want you to keep your hands on the couch when I touch you.”

You placed your palms firmly on the couch, gripping tighter as Agatha got closer to your core. She used a finger to swirl and stroke around your entrance but she never entered. She played around like that for a few minutes, watching how wet you quickly became. She gently pushed a finger into you, delighted at the load gasp you let out. She placed a gentle kiss to your thigh before pushing her finger deeper and then pulling it back out. Agatha repeated the motion for a bit, letting you get used to the intrusion, before picking up the pace and watching the way your face contorted in pleasure. She continued the pace for a bit before slipping in another finger. 

You started to let out loud moans of her name, unable to control yourself with this new feeling inside of you. You couldn’t hold yourself back, and your moans continued to grow loader. Agatha watched how easily you took her fingers, throbbing and pulsing around them. She could tell you were getting closer to an orgasm and removed her fingers. She brought them up to her mouth to taste, and she couldn’t control her moan at how good you tasted. 

“You did so well for me baby. I’m going to show you something else babygirl and then I’ll let you have a turn with mommy okay? Stay good for me, you’re my perfect angel.”

At that, Agatha took her thumb to your clit, before pressing down. You let out a yelp at that, and she swirled her thumb around in apology. She kept playing around, enjoying how nicely you moaned for her, and how desperate your pussy was with the way it was clenching around nothing. She decided to taste you from the source, replacing her thumb with her tongue and swirling delicately around your sensitive nub. You moaned even louder at that and Agatha chuckled directly into you. She continued her teasing, bringing her tongue down your slit, licking a few stripes before teasing your entrance and then pulling away all together. 

Your mouth hung open trying to catch your breath when Agatha pulled away, and she knew she had you right where she wanted you. 

“Alright baby, you were so good for me. I’ll let you pick your reward honey. Do you wanna play with mama’s boobs or her pussy?”

“Umm, I don’t know mommy, what if I’m not good at playing with your pussy? I like playing with your boobs.”

“Oh sweetheart, how about you give it a chance alright? I’ll let you play extra with my boobs if it’ll make you feel better.”

You nod at her, and she leans back against the couch with her leg spread open. 

“Okay baby, why don’t you kneel in front of me. It’ll make things easier for you.”

Ever so obedient, you immediately kneel in front, and make your way to undo her skirt. Agatha helps you in ridding her skirt and underwear, before spreading her legs open for you, allowing you to see her glistening pussy.

“Now baby, I’ll give you a few minutes to let you play however you want, but when I tell you to, enter two of your fingers inside of me okay?”

You nod before letting your fingers roam through her slit, sliding through a few times before reaching her clit. When you peer up at Agatha, she’s breathing heavily so you assume you’re doing something right. You gently rub at her clit, smiling when she lets out a moan. Agatha snakes a hand into your hair, and you let that be your sign to continue. 

“Baby, I want you to go inside me now okay? Mommy wants to feel good.”

You slipped two fingers inside and started pumping them inside. The hand in your hair tightened and you continued your pace, spurred on by her moans. You continue to finger her but your mouth can’t resist the sight of clit. You take it into your mouth and Agatha nearly screams at the sensation.

“Oh, oh just like that angel. You’re making me feel so good sweetheart, I’m so close angel just keep going. So good for me honey.” 

You double your efforts, desperate to please her. In a couple more sucks, you feel a warm liquid gush out of Agatha and you eagerly lap it up, becoming addicted to the taste. She gently pulls you away from her core and into her lap. 

“Oh my darling, you were such a good girl for me baby. Do you want mommy’s boobs now? You can have anything you like doll.”

“I want your boobies mommy, but I have a question for you.”

“What is it baby?”

“What was the liquid at the end, I didn’t have that when you were playing with me mommy.”

“Oh honey. That's what happens with you have an orgasm. I haven’t given you one yet because I want you to be able to focus on properly learning sweetheart. I was going to introduce orgasms to you at our next lesson.”

You nodded at her before tugging at her top, begging to see her tits again. Agatha removes her top and bra for you, and you eagerly dive in. She lets you rest against her as you seek her out and she sighs in relief. Her plan was falling nicely into place and she couldn’t be happier. Before long, Agatha realized how late it was for you and decided to call it a night. She pressed a gentle kiss to you before leaving, promising how good the next lesson will be for you if you remembered her rules. You promised her before shutting the door behind her. 

You immediately headed into the shower to try and calm down. Everything about tonight made your head spin and you didn’t want to be apart from Agatha. You tucked yourself to bed and hoped that this week would fly by.

Unfortunately for you, you couldn’t escape the curiosity of an orgasm. You wanted to know what it felt like and you weren’t sure if you could wait all the way until Friday. You laid down in bed fully naked. You felt really awkward doing this, it didn’t feel anything remote to what you were doing with Agatha, that was what made you excited. 

Your finger approached your core and you weren’t even sure what to do first. You let yourself explore for a few minutes but it didn’t feel anything close to how Agatha had touched you. Rubbing your clit didn’t help much either, and you groaned out in frustration. All of a sudden you realized you had broken Agatha’s rules. Suddenly you shot out of bed and started panicking. What if she stopped seeing you after this because you became her bad girl? You burst out into tears and realized you needed to see her right now. Little did you know, Agatha watched the whole thing go down through her camera. She had been checking up on you to make sure you were obeying her, and she was thoroughly disappointed to see you breaking her rules. What she didn’t expect even more was you knocking at her door, half naked in tears. 

She ushered you inside and brought you in for a hug, trying to figure out what happened.

“Mommy, I’m so sorry. I- I’m so sorry mommy. I was a bad girl. I messed up. I’m so sorry you have to forgive me, I wasn’t thinking properly. I’ll never do anything like this again, please don’t hate me mama.”

Agatha took pity on you and decided to take it easy on you. “What do you mean baby? What happened sweetheart? I would never hate you.”

“I- I broke your rule,” you hiccuped between words, completely overwhelmed with your current situation. “I was curious about what you said about orgasming and I wanted to see what it was and practice on myself. I didn’t even get to touch myself very well because it didn’t feel like when you did it but I still broke your rule and I’m sorry.”

You were wailing at this point and Agatha felt sorry for you. Did she hate that you disobeyed her? Yes. However she was just going to edge you once before letting you orgasm.

“Oh my darling, you’re still my girl sweetheart. I’m not going anywhere. I’m disappointed in you but you’ll just take a punishment and if you behave through your punishment, I’ll show you an orgasm.”

You immediately agreed, desperate to get in her good graces. 

She laid you down over her couch while removing whatever clothing you had found to cover yourself. Her fingers immediately sunk into your pussy and set an unforgiving pace, you had moaned and wailed around her but you took it, allowing Agatha to use you as she pleased. She knew best after all. You felt a weird sensation in your lower belly and you tried to warn Agatha. She pulled out of you after that. You couldn’t hold back your whine and she stroked your hair.

“Tell me what you want baby.”

“I want you mommy. I want you to play with me all the time, I don’t want to wait until just Fridays anymore. I wanna be with you and sleep with you afterwards and go on dates with you.”

“Sounds an awful lot like you want to be my girl honey. Is that it? You want to be my girl, have mama take care of you? Well, I can’t say I’d be opposed to it. It would be nice to have my baby girl by my side all the time hm. l would like that angel.”

You beam at her and Agatha can’t resist kissing you deeply. Her tongue enters your mouth and immediately establishes dominance, sucking and swirling against yours. You’re breathless when she pulls away, and you immediately chase her lips. 

Agatha throws you over her shoulder and brings you into her bedroom, desperate to claim you as hers. She lays you down in the middle of the bed before shuffling through her drawer and pulling out some ribbon. She toes your hands to her bed posts and you peer up at her confused. You refuse to voice anything, not when you were so close to your reward. She starts trailing kisses down your body, taking her time to explore all of you. She leaves hickeys in her wake, and she knows you’ll be wearing her marks for the next few days. The thought fills her with need and she hurries her exploration, stopping right at your glistening pussy. 

Agatha dives right in, lapping at your wetness before focusing her attention on your clit. She sucks hard, enjoying the way she can feel you pulse. Your moans are music to her ears and she enters you again, fingering you hard and fast, building you back up to where you were before. She curls her fingers to hit your spongy spot and your mind goes blank. You moan loudly and completely go limp, letting Agatha use your pussy. You feel the same pressure in your tummy again.

“Mama, mama please I feel weird.”

“Oh honey, mama knows. Let go for mama, you’re doing so well for me precious.”

Her words spur you on and you’re falling apart against her fingers, moaning loudly and twitching as you ride out your orgasm. You lay there limply afterwards and Agatha immediately rushes to untie you.

 The moment she comes back near you, you cling to her, desperately latching on to her. She lays down comfortably next to you and you immediately bring your head to her chest, right next to her boob. Agatha has an inkling for what you want so she unties her robe, giving you full access to her. Your head piques up with interest and she guides you towards her nipple where you happily latch on. She lets you enjoy your suckling, stroking your head while quietly praising you.

You fall asleep with your mouth latched to her nipple and your other hand by her stomach. Agatha has never been happier, wearing a giddy smile as she starts to feel drowsy. She’ll take down her cameras soon, knowing that she’ll eventually have you living with her anyways. Pressing another kiss to your head, she lets sleep claim her knowing she has everything she wants.

notes: i feel like this is terrible so im very very sorry if it is 😔

tag list: @morbidlcve

[wooahaes]

svt - whatever you say, beautiful

pairing: non-idol!svt x gn!reader

prompt: i'm not arguing with a man who has big brown eyes. whatever you say, beautiful.

warnings: established relationship aus. food and alcohol mentions. jeonghan and reader lovingly calling each other 'ugly' like an old married couple. 96z roommates au (jun). soonyoung's terrible mayo-ketchup concoction (jun). reader gets called beautiful back (jun, soonyoung). friends -> lovers (jun, soonyoung, jihoon). bickering as a love language (minghao, seungkwan). sexual implications from a third party (chan telling seungkwan to let him know if he needs to put headphones on or leave).

daisy's notes: i wrote that vernon drabble and gave myself brainrot. also on jeonghan's: ik there's cultures that do this lol but for those unaware: pls don't take it as a serious thing haha its meant to be akin to calling someone silly or goofy. i just think it gives old married couple energy to be like 'you're a nuisance but you're my nuisance and i adore you wholeheartedly.' like seungkwan tells them: just tie the knot if they want to, because they already act like they've been married for seventy years.

choi seungcheol

seungcheol was sprawled out in your bed, blanket securely tucked around him while he scrolled through his phone. sleepovers, at this stage in your relationship, weren't exactly uncommon... but the giddiness still hadn't worn off. the two of you didn't intend on moving in together for at least another year, both of you enjoying living on your own for right now after so, so much time of living with other people. still... that would never stop you from enjoying the sight of your beloved in your bed, ready for sleep, and winding down by checking his social media for the second or third time today.

until you saw him stop. he furrowed his brow, that handsome face completely perplexed. and you fought back a grin, because you knew exactly what was confusing him.

today the two of you decided to publicly reveal your relationship to more than just immediate family and very very close friends. seungcheol had been thrilled over it: he'd always been wanting to show you off since you started dating. but when you asked for a little time, he didn't fight: he just met you where you were. and now that everyone knows...

"what is this?"

he turned his phone to face you, giving you full view of the caption you lovingly wrote out. it sat underneath a collection of pictures, some taken by you, others by him, and one taken by one of his close friends in preparation of this special day... and, of course, it was a silly little joke.

i'm not arguing with my man and his big brown eyes. whatever you say, beautiful. ❤️

you snickered, crawling into bed next to him. "what's wrong with it?"

"nothing!" but he was pouting, and you knew what was coming next. "did you see my post?" he was already moving to pull it up, as though you hadn't read and re-read it a million times while he was in the shower.

so you decided to torment him. just a little bit. "you don't like it...?" you frowned, putting on your best 'kicked puppy' look.

"i do like it!" he was quick to try and assuage your worries. he turned over so that he could face you. "but... when we decided to tell everyone, i thought you wouldn't post a meme as the caption."

"so you hate it." you crossed your arms, pouting as hard as you could muster.

"i don't hate it! i didn't say--i didn't mean that, i just--" he looked up, watching you for longer than a few seconds. then he snorted, hand resting over his heart for a minute. "you're going to be the death of me."

with a snort, you crawled closer to him, all but dragging him up so that you could kiss him. "you know you're the normal one here."

he giggled, capturing your lips in another quick peck. "maybe i am," he said. "... i do like it, though. just warn me next time."

yoon jeonghan

joshua (hannie's coworker): [IMAGE.JPEG]

joshua (hannie's coworker): can you come get him he's bickering with seungkwan rn

joshua (hannie's coworker): (it's mostly seungkwan bickering but jeonghan is actually fighting back a little)

joshua (hannie's coworker): (it's literally over who's paying for chan's birthday dinner. cheol literally picked up the check half an hour ago right after they started.)

you: omw. also idk how seungkwan does it. i'm not arguing with a man with big brown eyes. whatever you say, beautiful.

the moment you pulled up outside the restaurant, you should have known exactly why jeonghan was grinning at you. he waved from the sidewalk, turning back to his friends to talk just a bit longer. he didn't move, which... on most days, you wouldn't care. but it was late, and you had work in the morning, and (according to joshua) they just spent the past few hours just chatting after their meal. five minutes melted into ten, and then into twenty...

and so you rolled down your window, yelling out a 'happy birthday!' to chan that finally got jeonghan's attention. another grin, and that was enough to tell you that he'd been waiting for that. he wouldn't do it for everyone, but chan? you knew their friendship was different. he hugged the guy one last time, and then made his way over to the car, climbing into the passenger seat. with a final wave to his friends, you pulled back onto the road, and started the journey home.

"so... you really think my eyes are beautiful?"

ah. that was the other reason the fucker wouldn't stop grinning at you. of course it couldn't just be one thing with jeonghan.

"you think i'm beautiful?" he watched you with this knowing smile, as though the two of you hadn't been dating for years now. as though you hadn't drunkenly confessed it before. "i'm starting to think you actually like me."

"you're just now realizing that?" you flicked on your blinker, coasting into the turn lane. "do you think i'd be living with you if i didn't?"

"you never call me beautiful to my face anymore, you know," he said, reaching for your bottle of water. without a care, he uncapped it, taking a long sip from it. "you just call me 'ugly' whenever you call me something."

that was far from true, to be fair: he was your love, your baby, your honey... and he was 'ugly' when you were particularly affectionate. "i have to keep you humble, ugly. you already know how beautiful you are."

his eyes twinkled a little as he looked at you, that fond smile telling you all you needed to know. "i know, ugly." he'd never been afraid to throw the word back at you, and you hoped that the tiny thrill it brought you never died.

no wonder seungkwan once said the two of you should go ahead and tie the knot. "you already act like it," he'd said, side-eyeing the two of you before taking a long sip of whatever coffee-flavor-of-the-day he'd picked out.

he reached over, prodding your cheek. when you glanced over, just enough to let him know you were listening, he just leaned against the center console with this handsome smile he reserved for you. "i love you."

and maybe he was a little drunk. just a little. but you let him have this one. "i love you, too, handsome."

joshua hong

"am i not worth the effort?" joshua couldn't even fight his playful grin now, his phone in his hand. "you couldn't even come up with an original post for our anniversary?"

with a roll of your eyes, you glanced back over his own post for a moment, pausing your search for movie snacks. he'd written out this long, sappy love letter to you about how he wanted to spend the rest of his life alongside you. it was sweet, and a little silly when he recounted the embarrassing story of how the two of you realized your feelings for one another (all it took was one spilled milkshake, courtesy of jeonghan), but overall a very public display of his adoration toward you. the picture-perfect, romance novel act of love from your boyfriend.

in other words: he was hamming it up so that people would gush over how he was the most adoring boyfriend, and how lucky you two were to have one another based on everything he said. in reality, he was literally eating your snacks right now. and later that night, he'd put his cold feet on you and then laugh over it.

"uh-huh." you continued searching through the cabinets after pocketing your phone. "should i have told everyone about how you somehow always manage to eat the last poptart in the box, even though you straight up told me that you keep count just so you can tease me over it?" you tossed an empty box into the bin, making a mental note to add them to the list. "or the time you literally ate all of my fries when we were on that road trip?"

"you're never gonna let me live that one down, are you?"

"didn't mention how god awful your workout clothes stink, either." you grimaced at the memory alone. "seriously, dude, how fucking hard do you go?"

"i forgot to wash them twice!" he turned around on the couch. "all because i said i thought it was cute when you mumble in your sleep and keep me up all night--"

"listen. i'm just doing damage control for you, hong," you pulled down a bag of chips, carefully rolled and clipped to keep them fresh. making your way back over, you continued, "really, you should be hiring me. i called you beautiful and mentioned those big brown bambi eyes." you threw yourself down next to him, bag crinkling as you unrolled it. you held up the first chip, an offering to him that he leaned over to take. "i think i deserve payment for it all."

but he grinned at you, settling back in. "i'll think about it. i'll get the big box of poptarts next time," he poked your side, just hard enough to get you to move off of his blanket, and then drew you right back in once he could throw it over you. "and i'll let you pick the first movie."

with a roll of your eyes, you reached for the controller. "what a gentleman."

wen junhui

your life was truly, sincerely, over. this was it. this was the big one. the big fuck-up that would kill you from embarrassment alone. if you were a sim in the sims 4, little sim jihoon would be sobbing over your body right now as the grim reaper came to take you away.

instead, he was just stiffling his laughter, patting the top of your head as you bury your face in a pillow. "it's not that bad."

"it's terrible! i was only posting that picture because we looked good!" you jerked up, staring at him. "and--and jun liked it! did he not read the caption?!"

"oh, he read it," soonyoung was doing something unholy in the kitchen, from the sounds of the ketchup bottle being opened alongside the smell of mayo. not another thing to ruin your day. "he's on his way home, by the way."

yep, this was how you died. surrounded by two of your roommates and being confronted by the guy you've had feelings for for... fuck, how long had you known him? since college? he'd been there for you after a particularly nasty breakup not long after the two of you met, and that was when your stupid heart fell for him. you'd always pushed back against it: it wasn't the right time. he was dating someone at one point. he wouldn't like you back. but the more the two of you started spending time alone, the deeper you fell.

"have you thought about just telling him how you feel?" jihoon asked, stealing your pillow and hugging it against his chest. "i know it's scary, but i don't think it'd go badly."

soonyoung looked over, condiments smeared on the outsides of his mouth as he chewed. he swallowed, wiping his face with a paper towel as he spoke, "even if he didn't like you, he'd let you down easily."

"soonyoung!" jihoon turned to face him. you rarely saw jihoon mad, but this had to be the closest.

soonyoung realized what he said. and immediately took off, shutting himself back into his room as jihoon raced to encounter him first. while he tried to jostle the door open, the yelling faded into background noise.

jun... what?

the apartment door opened after a while, wonwoo standing there with jun right behind him. without hesitating, you hopped up off of the couch, immediately excusing yourself as you went to hide in your own room. jun called after you, and you just shut the door behind you, face in your hands. this could not be happening. this wasn't happening. if soonyoung was telling the truth, and, because jihoon yelled at him, he definitely was... what now?

jun knocked on your door. everything outside of your room was silent now. if jihoon was chewing out soonyoung, you'd probably hear some of it. yet... quiet. peaceful quiet that you weren't exactly used to with this bunch.

"can we talk?" he spoke up after a moment. "i don't exactly get the caption, but... do you really think i have beautiful eyes?"

oh. he had no idea it was some meme you'd seen online that always reminded you of him. yet the gentle way he'd asked made your heart flutter all the same. you said nothing, just sitting with your back against the door.

"it's okay if you do." you could hear the sound of him moving, and slowly, it sounded as though he was sitting, too. "i... i think you have pretty eyes, too." was it possible to hear his uneasy smile in the way his voice shook just a little, his nerves so, so evident? "the others left, by the way. so we could talk. wonwoo was confused, but jihoon dragged both him and soonyoung out for a walk."

that answered one question, at least. again, you just said nothing, curling up as tight as you could. your heart hammered in your ears, and you shut your eyes. was this really happening?

"i've liked you for a long time," he said, voice just as gentle as it was before. like he, too, was scared of what this all meant. the two of you were crossing a line you never thought you'd even tread near, let alone vault over. "it's okay if you don't feel the exact same way. but... you're sweet. and i--"

you bit the bullet. you got up, opening your door to see jun turning to face you. he'd been sitting there, back against the door, talking to the air while you'd been too scared to face him. he stood up as quickly as he could, watching you carefully.

he was the one who spoke first. "hi."

"hi." you said it back, heart racing. "i think you're beautiful."

and oh-so-shyly he smiled back at you. "i... think you're beautiful, too."

maybe this would be the start of something good.

kwon soonyoung

with your eyes screwed shut, you knew that seungcheol was going to give you so, so much shit about this when you told him. knowing your luck, it was going to go horribly, and you'd probably die right here and it'd be your ghost haunting seungcheol... but that was something you could deal with.

yet the moment 'tiger kwon' popped up on your phone, you knew you couldn't avoid this forever. you'd pester soonyoung later for changing his name in your phone again. for now, you just answered the request for a video call, and you were met with those pretty eyes staring at you in the low light.

"hi." he giggled. "i don't think that text was meant for me."

astute observation, considering the first three messages before you gushed about his eyes and called him beautiful were "FUCK" and "CHEOL I CAN'T DO THIS" and then a picture of the two of you from when you grabbed dinner together earlier. you expressed your romantic frustrations in the only way you knew how: a screenshot you'd seen of someone's tweet. the same thing you'd said to seungcheol many, many times before.

"so what does that even mean?" he's grinning, and you knew that it's half-genuine. he was smart enough to get the gist of it (to put it simply: you were, as you'd been told, down bad) but you weren't sure how often soonyoung saw memes like this. he was watching your face, those cute eyes shining with the light from his phone screen, and he rolled onto his stomach. "when did you get worse at technology than me?"

was this what confessing to soonyoung would bring? a lifetime of having a cute man tease you oh-so-lovingly?

"are you alive?"

you managed to squeak out a deeply embarrassed, "yep."

he just giggled, head resting on his hand. "do you text seungcheol like that a lot?" he waited. and when you didn't answer, too embarrassed to speak, he continued on, "i think he and jihoon trade war stories, then. jihoon..." his cheeks were dusted red. "jihoon hears a lot about you."

holy fuck. your stomach was doing flips. "soonyoung?"

"this is embarrassing, isn't it?" he chuckled, eyes focusing on his screen again. "jihoon said it's some sort of joke. vernon showed it to him once. but... i think you're beautiful, too."

truly, this man would be the death of you if he kept smiling at you like that. like you were his world already, eyes shiny and cheeks red.

"i..." your mouth felt dry. "can we... maybe... a date?" something about seeing his face right now made your mind go blank.

he chuckled. "i'm free this weekend," he said, still smiling. "we'll talk tomorrow morning. okay?"

"okay." you licked your lips, just trying to come down from this high. "goodnight."

the moment he ended the call, you were texting seungcheol: LET'S FUCKING GO GOT A DATE W SOONYOUNG!!!

and in return, he sent you three words: about fucking time.

jeon wonwoo

people always warned you about marrying the love of your life. the honeymoon period was something strong, that tinted your days with sugary kisses and honeyed skies until it all dissolved when reality washed back over the two of you. yet you had been married to wonwoo for two years now, and that sweetness never seemed to melt from your lives. the honeymoon period was over, yes, but the work you put into your relationship kept things lively. arguments came and went, and you always found yourself enamored with the man who guarded your heart in the same way you guarded his.

that was why anniversaries were special. not because they were another milestone, another celebration of a year the two of you made together... but an excuse to gush about wonwoo. you kept it to two days in particular: your wedding anniversary, and his birthday, both dates set months apart. wonwoo was different than you, however: he didn't want to broadcast his feelings for the world to see. he reserved all the sweet things for words he physically wrote down for you to read, or as things he said to you outright when he was sappy enough.

and you? well... he knew your true feelings would never be one-hundred-percent out there. those were reserved for him. but if you wanted to gush about how much you loved him, then who was he to stop you?

he'd been scrolling through his instagram feed that night while brushing his teeth, only to snort when he finished reading your post. the duality of your relationship was beautiful: he'd posted a short, sweet caption for you underneath a lovely quote from a book the two of you loved. and you had gushed... and finished it off with a meme that you sent to him the moment you saw it. i'm not arguing with a man who has big brown eyes. whatever you say, beautiful. the same words you teased him with when you were in a particularly playful mood.

so when he returned to you, he just crawled into bed, pressing kisses against your face. his affectionate moods would always take you by surprise, and he was glad for that. it spiced up the relationship just a little that he was still able to surprise you after all this time.

"you're so cute," he curled up with you, pulling you into his arms. "happy anniversary. i love you."

you snorted a little. "i see you've noticed."

"should i have read it sooner?"

you waved him off, "no, no... i'm glad you didn't see it until now. check the comments when you get the chance. a bunch of your friends loved it."

he was sure that they did. they all seemed to adore the duality of the two of you more than he did. the quiet, studious wonwoo and his silly love who made him laugh more than anyone else. but he knew as well as you did: no one would love your dynamic more than the two of you did.

he was your home, just as you had become his.

lee jihoon

all jihoon wanted to do was ask if you wanted to go to dinner. he'd suggested a place, you'd suggested another, and he mentioned not wanting that kind of cuisine... only for the words to appear on his phone within the next few minutes: i'm not arguing with a man who has big brown eyes. whatever you say, beautiful.

... beautiful?

"soonyoung!" he yelled out for one of his housemates. if he wasn't here, then seungcheol would come in. yet he heard the sound of footsteps quickly approaching, soonyoung sliding against the wooden floor a little as he looked in. "read this."

so he did. he read it once, and then again before looking up. "... they're flirting with you, i think."

"that's weird, right?" jihoon looked up. "they don't like me back."

"how do you know that?" soonyoung grinned, leaning against the empty doorframe. "you don't know that. they're hitting on you. shoot your shot."

"i'm not going to--"

his phone started to ring. he looked down, wide-eyed, as he realized you started to call him. before he could debate denying the call and pretending the text never came, soonyoung bolted forward, answering it before immediately leaving his room. the little shit--

"oh my god," you said, "i'm so, so fucking sorry--mingyu's here and i was trying to look up other places to eat on my laptop, and he had the bright idea to text you that shit. i left my phone alone for one minute, and this is what happened--"

"why would he text me that?" jihoon could feel his heart begin to hammer in his chest. why would mingyu tease him like that? mingyu knew that you were off limits when it came to this kind of thing. unless...

"i--well, i--" you stammered, all sentences melting in your mouth before you finally let out a long sigh. in the background, he could hear mingyu begin to laugh. "shut up!" and then the sound of a door slamming behind you. "fucking--" you let out a sigh. "sorry. made the mistake of putting you on speaker."

"that's okay." jihoon leaned against the back of the chair. "but my question...?"

with another sigh, he could hear you settle into something. a chair, a couch--he wasn't sure. "this isn't how i wanted this to go... but... i like you. and i guess mingyu's had enough of hearing about it. it's okay if you don't feel the same, but... that's all."

quiet. neither of you moved to speak, to pitch another restaurant to go to. jihoon opened a new tab on his browser, already typing in a new search for the best places to take a first date.

"jihoon?"

no point in not taking the leap now. you'd already taken the first step: he could do the next one. "can... can tonight be our first date, then? instead of us getting dinner as friends."

quiet.

"jihoon..." your voice was soft. "i'd love that."

note to self: thank mingyu.

xu minghao

"what does this mean?" minghao looked up from his phone, where you could clearly see the post you'd made earlier. it was a combination of candids and the actual pretty pictures you'd taken of him, all captioned with a joke. he began typing something out, "we bickered about toast this morning."

"oh my god, hao--"

then your phone buzzed. you looked down, and there it was: minghao calling you out on your own damn post. when you looked up from your phone, he just had that stupid smug grin on his face. he crossed his arms, leaning back in his chair as he waited for you to defend yourself.

"it's a joke. it's a meme. maybe you should learn them, old man."

he rolled his eyes. "it's a lie and i'm not standing for it. everyone knows that we argue about everything."

even before the two of you started dating, you'd bicker about the smallest things. none of it was ever serious--the two of you had only fought a handful of times in the entirety of knowing one another--but you remembered the annoyed look you would get sometimes. just go make out already had been what his friends would say. eventually, it turned into mingyu telling minghao to go ahead and give you the marriage papers already. the two of you were in it for life, weren't you?

which, ultimately, turned into you and minghao bickering about that, too. the two of you hadn't even been dating at the time, but you would both be lying if you said that conversation hadn't made the two of you figure out your feelings. you'd retorted that minghao wouldn't get along with your parents like that, leading to him actively calling them to prove that, yes, in fact, he would.

(you would simply never live down both of them going "he isn't your boyfriend? we were waiting for you to be ready to tell us," and the subsequent call where your mother chewed you out for hanging up on her right after.)

"we don't argue about everything."

minghao gave you a pointed look. "strawberry jam."

you pinched the bridge of your nose. "not this shit again. i thought we agreed that butter is--"

... fuck, he was proving his point.

"fine," you said. "we bicker a lot. doesn't mean i can't lie via meme."

he just smiled, happy to have won whatever little argument this almost turned into. "everyone knows this is our love language," he said, head resting in his hand. "but fine. you can lie through your memes."

and thus he put the two of you on equal grounds once again: a truce, in a sense. just like most of your little debates ended in.

kim mingyu

"you know you could just call me pretty if you wanted to."

your face burned at the way mingyu was giggling now. all you did was text him a meme (yes, from the other end of the couch) and wait for his response. he'd read it under his breath before bursting into giggles, so, so enamored with the way that you were. he always had been: mingyu, unlike you, wasn't shy when it came to his affection. he complimented you constantly on anything and everything, whether it be your appearance or the way you rambled to him or the way you clammed up "all cutely embarrassed" (his words, not yours) when you realized just how much you said. you told him once that you weren't the most open about your feelings or the loudest.

and he'd merely kissed your forehead and said that was okay. he was loud enough for the both of you. if loving him quietly meant that you loved him, then that was all that mattered to him.

you whined his name at him, trying to hide your face. you knew that you always would get this doe-eyed, dreamy look on your face whenever he teased you like this. you caught a glimpse of it in a mirror once when you were at a store buying furniture, and swore to yourself you'd never let him catch you like this so obviously ever again.

of course, that was moot because mingyu saw that sappy look on your face and treasured it every time... but for your own sake, you couldn't let him notice.

yet he laughed anyway, crawling over to pull your hands away from your face. "i mean it!" he squished your cheeks, "just call me pretty next time. that's what you wanted to say, right?"

you pushed his hands away from your face, just so that you could speak clearly. "i think you have pretty eyes."

his smile dropped, eyes going wide. and he slowly pulled away, face turning redder by the second as he turned from you. "you can't just say it like that! i wasn't prepared!"

you felt a little bold this time. "whatever you say, beautiful--"

the groan that mingyu let out, fully flustered by you now, only made you feel more confident in teasing him. no wonder his friends loved to pick on him... he was so cute about it.

lee seokmin

the minute you finished saying it, seokmin had burst into giggles. all because you wanted to jokingly flirt with your beloved and see his reaction. he had looked up from his phone, where he'd been idly googling to find dinner options, and then you could see those gears turning before he started laughing.

"really?" he reached over, drawing you into his arms. "so you won't argue with me tonight?" seokmin squished your cheeks to pucker your lips, planting an loud kiss against them. "all because you think i'm beautiful?"

you just fought back a laugh, reaching up to toy with the hair at the base of his neck. "whatever you want, beautiful."

another giggle burst past his lips, and he dropped one hand down, sliding it up your thigh. "do you mean it? or are you just flirting with me?" he gently squeezed your thigh, just a little. "you don't have to flirt with me like that. i'm already yours."

ever the romantic. you drew him in for another quick kiss, soflty laughing against his lips. "gotta keep you here somehow," you teased. "it's hard to compete with you when you're mister perfect."

his nose brushed against your own. "i think you keep up just fine." he paused, drumming his fingers against the outside of your thigh idly. "can i confess something?"

you watched him curiously. "huh?"

"your best friend..." his hand slid up to your hip before he loosely draped his arms around your waist. "when we got together, they messaged me to tell me you talk about my eyes a lot."

oh no. "you know you have pretty eyes--"

"like a baby seal." he giggled. "and something about having puppy dog eyes, too."

ohhh no. of course they'd rat you out. "but am i wrong?"

he just nuzzled his nose against your own for a minute, planting a tiny kiss against the tip of it. "i just like you. you're so silly, it's cute."

with a smile, you just settled against him. "i mean it, though. pick wherever you want, beautiful." his giggles only made you happier. "i'll pay."

boo seungkwan

"chan and i bicker less than we do."

seungkwan wasn't phased by your flirty word or the way you were trying to call him beautiful (my boo-tiful boo, if your silly phone contact was anything to go by). he just looked up from his phone with a flat expression, which... probably meant he saw that post somewhere for himself. the lack of originality probably also got you here.

"okay, fine, that's true," you said, rolling your eyes. "you're still beautiful, though."

"i know that," he said. "but we argue a lot over silly stuff. vernon said he thinks it's a love language."

another roll of your eyes. "seungkwan, we don't argue that much."

"don't we? remember that time the neighbors got concerned because we got a little too heated about the way one of our dramas ended?" he crossed his arms. "i still think the ending was good, but you got angry over the way it tried to incorporate greek myth and--"

"it was incorporating greek tragedy and didn't give it the sad ending!" you threw your hands up in the air. "don't promote it as being based on the myth if you aren't going to have a tragic ending!"

"it didn't have to! it was a retelling! things don't have to adhere strictly to--"

chan's door opened, and he walked out of his room. he looked at the two of you before groaning. "this fight again?"

"we're not arguing!" the two of you said together, turning to face him.

chan just rolled his eyes, making his way over to the kitchen. "sure..." then he took one look at the two of you, shaking his head. "i'm going to see if yeonjun wants to go out. don't do anything until i'm gone or have headphones on."

"we don't--"

"you do. just keep arguing or whatever," he pulled out his phone, walking back to his room.

his door shut. and the two of you just looked at each other. seungkwan rolled his eyes, flopping back down on his end of the couch.

"i hate him," he said offhandedly, no venom behind it. you knew just as well as seungkwan did that if chan was in trouble, seungkwan would be one of the first to run there. "who does he think he is? he always acts as if he knows our relationship better than we do."

you slid over closer to him, and he lifted an arm so that you could cuddle in. "he's a jerk," you said, again, no real malice behind it at all. "you should come live with me."

he rolled his eyes. "you always say that." he turned his face, kissing your temple. "like we don't have plans already."

once his lease was up. but you just looked up at him, smiling a little. "whatever you say, beautiful."

that shy smile told you all you needed to know. keep calling me sweet things, then.

chwe vernon

"uh-huh." he didn't even look up from his phone, scrolling through his youtube history. "did i send you this video?"

you frowned. "you're not even going to say anything?"

"you've used that on me before." he continued to scroll. he looked up for just a moment. "also, i'm thinkin'... maybe we could go get tacos for lunch? haven't been to that place in a while." vernon turned his attention back to his phone. "i'm down for whatever, though."

with a groan, you slumped into the couch, already googling for cheesy pick-up lines. the back-up plan, always, for when you need to tease your boyfriend. "hey, nonny? do you have a map--"

"because you're lost in my eyes," he said without missing a beat. "actually, i'm really craving tacos now. i think we could get an order to-go if you don't feel like going out."

he hated you. this had to explain everything. "do you believe in love at first sight--"

"i might," he moved over so that he was closer to you, pulling your legs into his lap. "so, were you being legit about the not arguing thing? because i might take my chance and order anyway."

with a roll of your eyes, you gave up. you weren't going to win this time around. "get your tacos, beautiful," you reached up, turning his face toward you. "i'll pay."

he snorted, bursting into giggles as he leaned over to kiss you. "you're such a dork."

you just smiled into his kiss. "but you love it."

lee chan

you loved confusing chan so, so much. all he did was ask what you wanted for dinner, and you hit him back with "whatever you want, beautiful. i'm not gonna argue with a man who has big brown eyes." thus began the confused looks as he looked at you, then his phone, unsure of how to respond to that.

"... what?"

"i said we can get whatever you want," you shrugged. "i'm not picky--"

"that's not what you said." he frowned just a little, clearly aware that you were teasing him in some way... but not quite connecting the dots quite yet. "you never call me beautiful," was what he settled on a moment later.

which was true. you often opted to call him handsome, usually with a soft laugh and a smile that showed just how endeared to him you really were. on occasion, you'd call something about him pretty--the way he styled his hair, or the makeup he wore once when mingyu roped him into being a model for him--but beautiful? as much as you thought he was (chan deserved all the complimentary words, in your humble, unbiased opinion), you'd never voiced that opinion to him directly. the closest was the time you told one of your friends that he had beautiful eyes.

he narrowed his eyes at you. "is this a joke?" for a split second, he glanced down at the phone in your hands. "... are you recording?"

"i can't call my man 'beautiful'?" you put on a fake pout, just to tease him further. "you really think i'm cruel enough to make fun of you like that?"

chan, however, knew you. he knew that you were easily swayed into pulling pranks on him. that time he introduced you to jeonghan was enough proof of that--and every subsequent trip with his friends always seemed to result in them picking out his weak spot and turning you against him, just for a simple joke. if it bothered him, he would have said something... but it did leave him fully aware that you were the kind of person to lovingly tease him.

lovingly, he told himself. he knew it was. but sometimes he wondered if you were put on this planet just to mess with him in a way he'd secretly love. if you were going to be the death of him, then at least he'd die loving you.

"okay." he made his way over, pulling up a restaurant. he showed you his screen, and immediately you focused on the fact that this place was far from cheap. "i want to go here."

"channie, we--"

"you just said you weren't going to argue," he smiled at you, leaning against you. "hm?"

with a sigh, you shook your head. "whatever you want, beautiful," you reached up. "i'll just eat ramen for the next few weeks--"

he snorted, leaning over to kiss your cheek. "just book it for our anniversary, then." he paused for a moment, just watching you with a tiny smile. "... do you really think i have beautiful eyes?"

how could you say anything other than 'yes' when he was staring at you with them?

taglist: @twancingyunhao @wonuziex @synthetickitsune @staranghae @porridgesblog

@actuallynarii @weird-bookworm @bangchansbae @laylasbunbunnyunny

[ice-cream-writes-stuff]

NRC And RSA

(What if Yuu went to Royal Sword Academy for a Exchange/Transfer student program?)

-

Yuu sat on the plush bed, the private room given to them was rather luxurious than the room they shared in Ramshackle. Little bits of belongings still sat in their luggage, a few trinkets (Y/N) had been packed to remind Yuu of NRC during their stay.

The magicless student smiles at the thought of their dorm and friends. Sighing as they eye the special uniform the RSA students had provided them.

While the rather, “princely” students were rather kind in their greetings, Yuu still didn’t feel all too comfortable. The quiet sounds of the ocean clear their thoughts as they get up from the bed. Peaking outside from the satin curtains, the small waves crashing along the sandy shore. 

After finding out that Yuu would be going to the school alone, Headmaster Crowely graciously offered Yuu a new phone. While you kept the old one. 

“To keep in touch during the trip!” Yuu heard the Headmage state, smiling too sweetly, clearly hiding his true intentions.

Picking up their phone, Yuu skims through the messages you had sent as soon as they left.

Pictures of Grim sleeping in class, pictures of you and Grim sitting next to the first-years at lunch. Then a photo of you, unaware, talking with a nervous student as figures zoom into the scene. Too blurry to make out the familiar uniforms on their persons. 

“Grim probably took that photo…” Yuu laughs. Before a knock is heard on the door. 

Yuu heads over, not before taking a small pick of the ocean.

Opening it up, preppy voices cheer loudly. “WELCOME TO ROYAL SWORD ACADEMY! YUU!”

-

“I miss Yuu…” You bemoan, lightly banging your hands on your face. Groaning in annoyance as Ace side eyes you. “(Y/N), Yuu’s fine. Probably annoyed with all those high-horse RSA students though.” Deuce makes a small sound of agreement. 

Grim munches on his tuna melt, a bit quiet… Which was never a good sign.

-

Yuu sat with Chenya and Neige, a few other students seated with the as well during lunch. The NRC picks at the dishes served as they listen to the small discussions going about. Occasionally giving a small response when a question was asked to them personally.

“Hmm.. Yuu~! I’m curious about something, if you don’t mind me asking..~” Chehnya smiles, eyes bright like a curious cat.

“Yes?”

“How’s (Y/N) doing? I haven’t seen’em in a bit, so I wanted to know.~” Chenya purrs out, laying a lazy hand on Yuu shoulder. Neige, overhearing, beams. White as snow skin becoming a soft pink as they lean in as well. “Oh yes! How are they? I haven’t seen them much since the masquerade event at Noble Bell College.” 

The actors red as rose lips turn into a frown, “My schedule has been so packed I haven’t had time to see them around town..” The boy wilts at the thought of missing his chance to see you as Snick offers him a sympathetic pat on the back. 

Yuu hears more chatter from a few other students popping in to add their own statements about (Y/N).

Rielle, Yuu recalled him from somewhere… Had spoken up. “I’ve seen them around the beach a few times!” 

“Really?”

“Uh-huh!”

Yuu blinks, the conversation becoming bigger than expected. But, they grin just like their fellow NRC friends. 

“Well, (Y/N) is good. I mean, they are Dorm Head of our Dorm, along with meetings with the other Dorm Leaders…  As VICE Leader, we’re with each other often.” Yuu smiles, shrugging. A certain glint in their eye. 

Neige's features become more flustered as he tries to ask another question. Before being interrupted by Yuu’s phone ringing.

-

“GRIM! GIVE IT BACK!”

“No! I wanna’ send Yuu photos of my tuna can tower!”

“Grim!” You try to grab the phone back as Jack follows after, but Grim was surprisingly quicker! Epel manages to corner the fur-ball, “Oi! Ya’cat! Give it up!”

“Epels accent is out! He’s pissed!”

Ortho readies his laser cannon, trying to get the perfect aim. "Grim, stand still please!" Grim shouts to as he tries to figure out away to avoid capture.

“Grim?”

“Yuu!”

“YUU!?”

The first-years shout all together, happy to hear the student.

Sebek grabs Grim by the scruff of his collar, handing him over to you as everyone gathers by the lounge area. Discussing about their day as Yuu talks about their own, “I gotta go guys.. I’ll see you in a couple days!”

“Give’em hell Yuu!”

“Good luck Yuu!”

“See you soon!”

Hanging up the call, Yuu returns back to the lunch table, a satisfied expression on their face. Maybe even a bit sentimental if you looked close enough...

-

[To celebrate the news of Twst FINALLY GETTING THE ANIME SOON. I decided to write a small fic for yall! Enjoy! Thanks for reading! LET ME KNOW HOW I DID! IM SO HAPPY WE GETTING THE ANIME!!!]

[sylusjinwoon]

{ 179 }

company.

academy arc

jinwoo sung x fem.reader

{ let's end each other's lonely nights | be each other's paradise | need a picture for my frame | someone to share my reign… }

you walked to school in the early hours of the morning, simply looking down at the novel you were reading in your hand. a smile paints your features the more you basked and read each scene, and as you were in the midst of turning the page, you felt a strange sensation creeping up on you-

the sensation of being followed.

your steps begin to slow just then, unaware of the large hand that reaches out to you-

as sung jinwoo lets out a rich chuckle of your name, wrapping an arm around you as he brings you closer to the front of his chest.

“morning, angel.” he purrs into your ear, sending shivers down your spine. you give him a playful pout, lightly pushing yourself away from him.

you missed the lost expression seen in his gaze the moment you pulled away from him, trying to calm down your racing heart as you smoothed down the skirt of your uniform.

with a cough, you put your novel back within the confines of your bag, choosing instead to walk side-by-side with jinwoo to school.

you and jinwoo had a special relationship-

this didn’t mean that you two were a couple or anything, oh no.

what you meant was that you still had memories of another life with jinwoo…

where you and him were both hunters, taking on raids while supporting each other throughout it all.

jinwoo was your best friend during those times; he helped train you, a mere b-rank hunter, making you more proficient in your raids as you slowly rose up the ranks, given you freedom to attend more high level raids despite never being able to level up like he could.

your memories became a little hazy after the war, and once jinwoo used the cup of reincarnation one last time-

you found yourself being 14 again, living with your parents and little brother in your humble home. perhaps what came as the most shocking to you was how you retained all of your memories.

which was why you felt so happy when you and jinwoo ended up going to the same high school together. he was a great source of comfort during the times when memories of your past life became too much to bear.

ah, but you were getting ahead of yourself-

you’ve since then gotten better at dealing with the hardships of your past life, even getting the tiniest bit upset when jinwoo admitted to taking on all the monarchs on his own, spending a total of 27 years within some strange, dimensional rift. you knew that he had won the war all on his own while telling you how he succeeded his mission, now living his life as a normal human despite how truly godlike he was.

jinwoo’s knuckles were suddenly felt being gently placed against the top of your head. “you’re dozing off again.”

“what? i am not dozing off, woowoo.”

a blush immediately paints his features when you refer to him by that stupid nickname. “h-hey, that nickname is dumb as hell, and that’s not even how you pronounce my name! the ‘woo’ in ‘jinwoo’ is more subtle than that, like a soft ~u.”

“heh, whatever, woowoo…!”

you giggle when his eyes flash purple in annoyance, running to catch up to you, but all while hiding his grin.

you would never know the depths of his feelings for you, and that fact alone was killing the shadow monarch on the inside.

{ … }

you and jinwoo end up enjoying lunch together back in the classroom, with you taking casual sips of your juice.

“so do you have track practice today?”

jinwoo takes a rice ball from your lunch box as you stole a piece of his bulgogi beef. “yeah, i do.”

“hehe, did you want me to hang out with you on the field?”

a soft smile paints jinwoo’s features, “if you don’t mind, then yeah. i could use your company.”

a teasing grin paints your expression, “you still trying to get with cha hae-in?”

jinwoo chokes on his rice ball, “w-what the- you know about that?!”

“what? it’s so obvious that you’re still into her! want me to look her up and give you her number or something?”

you giggle in response, basking in jinwoo’s embarrassed expression. you recall how jinwoo was pretty much dating cha hae-in in the original timeline, and they were truly such a cute couple in your eyes!

two of the most renowned s-rank hunters taking on high level gates, never once failing their missions or goals. because of jinwoo’s blossoming romance, you, being simply labeled as his best friend, took a step back and gave them the space they needed in order to let their romance bloom.

and now, with time going backwards due to jinwoo’s actions, you were certain he was going to try and capture her heart once more, leaving you more than willing to play as his wingwoman once more.

despite your playful words, jinwoo appeared uncomfortable, shifting his rice around his lunch box with his chopsticks, eyebrows furrowed in response. noticing the change in his demeanor, you softly ask him, “are you okay?”

your question snaps him out of his reveries. “i’m fine. here, you can have the rest of my lunch… i’ll be right back.”

you could tell something was wrong with jinwoo, watching as he stood up a bit too fast for your liking when you stop him, allowing your hand to wrap around his wrist. “wait, where are you going?”

he looks down at you with gentle grey eyes, allowing the pad of his thumb to grace at your cheek as he wiped away an imaginary stain. after that simple touch, he points to your empty juice bottle.

“i was going to get you more juice. are you opposed to it?”

your eyes go wide, but you shook your head in response. “no, i don’t mind it.”

jinwoo gives you a nod, shaking your grip off of his wrist, leaving you utterly confused as you kept staring at his quickly retreating form.

“how strange…” you look down at your shadow, seeing a few, glowing purple eyes glancing back at you.

at least he still wanted to protect you-

even when you knew you did something to upset him.

{ … }

jinwoo told you he didn’t mind you watching him at practice-

but you didn’t feel like your presence was warranted after upsetting him at lunch earlier. so, you hid out at the library, working on some assignments while doing your readings for your classes. you had thoughts about going home first, but deep down, you knew that avoiding jinwoo wouldn’t help with making this whole situation any better.

as you were writing, you immediately became aware of the shadow looming over you, a pair of solemn, glowing violet eyes staring down at you with a neutral expression.

“why didn’t you join me at practice?”

you tremble a bit, detecting the accusation in jinwoo’s voice as you let out a sigh.

“how could i join you when you’re mad at me?” you whisper back at him.

hearing his scoff tones down your anxieties the tiniest bit, and you felt your shoulders visibly relax at the sound of it. you finally gather the courage to meet his gaze, seeing jinwoo leaning closer to you while placing a hand on the table.

he was dressed in his track uniform, consisting of a purple and white shirt with matching shorts. he taps the top of his sneakers against the linoleum floors, giving you a nice view of his muscular calves.

you were ready to tease him about it, your lips puckered up as a low whistle escapes from them when jinwoo suddenly wraps an arm around the back of your head.

your words die against your throat, eyes going wide when your face was pressed directly against jinwoo’s chest. he runs his fingers through your hair, a pained whisper heard coming from him when he asks,

“do you really not feel a single thing from me? am i doomed to remain just friends with you in this timeline, too?”

your mouth goes dry when you hear his question, and you were uncertain as to how to respond to him. you felt your lips open and close, yet still, not a single syllable would come out.

jinwoo lets out a disappointed ‘tsk’ then, shoving you away from him as he gazes down at you with a neutral look. “forget about it. just… forget about it.”

you watch helplessly when jinwoo picks up his duffel bag and backpack, facing away from you as your heart clenched painfully in response.

if you didn’t stop him now, then you’d lose him forever.

shoving back your chair with such intensity that it nearly falls to the ground, you grab jinwoo’s wrist once more. his eyes go wide, and you catch his shocked expression momentarily before standing on the tip of your toes to fully kiss him.

his reaction was immediate- instinctive even when he wraps his arms around your back, bringing you achingly closer to him all while deepening the kiss.

you lost track of time, uncertain of how many kisses you shared when you finally found the strength to pull away from him. he keeps both of his arms wrapped tightly around you, purple eyes gazing down at you in amusement and love, all while running his hands through your hair.

“i… i always thought that you always deserved a girl like cha hae-in… because, well, you know… she was pretty powerful… and gorgeous, too.”

jinwoo scoffs at your admission, but remains quiet, wishing for you to go on and explain yourself.

“that’s why, i kept all my feelings hidden for you.” unable to meet his gaze, you play with the front of his shirt, smoothing the fabric while picking away at the imaginary lint. “i always figured you deserved better than me-“

“tch, stop.”

jinwoo then gently pulls you back by your hair, eyes becoming more passionate when he crashes his lips against yours. you could only whimper in response to his sudden kiss, hands remaining curled up against his chest as jinwoo presses you even closer to him.

he pulls away first, lightly panting before admitting to you, “please… i never wanted hae-in… but you were so determined to set us up that neither one of us knew what to do.”

you blink up at him in complete shock. “what…? but, she had such a huge crush on you…?!”

jinwoo chuckles all while tracing the pad of his thumb against your bottom lip. “well yeah… she liked me, but that didn’t mean that i liked her. how could i like her when i already had you?”

your head was spinning, yet despite it all, you couldn’t stop the smile from forming. “eh? but didn’t you say you wanted to join track to meet her someday?”

jinwoo lets out a huff, bringing your frame into his chest once more before coming clean to you. “forgive me and my poor attempts at making you jealous. joining track was just an excuse, really.”

his admission finally earns bouts of laughter from you, feeling so relieved and happy that your feelings were requited after all. after spending a few more minutes in each other’s embrace, jinwoo gives your body one last squeeze before pulling away from you, giving your forehead a gentle kiss.

“how about i walk back home with you, then, we can talk about our plans for our upcoming first date.”

you giggle, watching as jinwoo packs up your notebooks and assignments before carrying your bag for you, giving you a lovesick expression while you cling on to his side.

perhaps dreams do come true after all…

a.n. - this is so self indulgent, but oh so much fun to write! (/ω＼)

all stories are written by rei; reposts, translations, and plagiarism are not allowed.

[shixcherie]

Sweet Like A Cherry| Kim Hongjoong ☆

~ ~ call me chérie ☆

☆☆ NOTE : I want to take a moment to apologize for any confusion caused by the overlapping scenes in my fic with @ja3hwa's dilf series. It was never my intention to cause any misunderstandings or plagerise her beautiful works. She has been a huge inspiration to me, and having read her fics in the past, I realize that some ideas may have stuck in my mind while writing this one.

I've worked hard to change those scenes completely and take the story in a more mysterious and mafia direction, which I had initially planned.

Also, a big thank you to @whatudowhennooneseesyou for helping me recognize the similarities and pointing me in the right direction. I truly appreciate it.

I hope you can overlook this minor mistake and continue to support me as I move forward. Your love for my work means the world to me!

Thank you and sorry again @ja3hwa

☆ Navigation | Kinktober List

☆ Day 11 : Age Gap, Dilf

↬ [ Synopsis ] : A birthday fling with Hongjoong takes a shocking turn when you realize he's your dad's best friend and he's hiding some dangerous secrets. Now, trapped on a family yacht, your growing desire for him becomes impossible to resist, unaware that someone has been watching both of you closely.

☆ Word Count : 2.4k ☆ Genre : Smut. Some Plot. ☆ Pairing : Dilf!Hongjoong x F.Reader [ Park Y/N, Seonghwa’s daughter ]

☆ ☆ ☆ WARNINGS : Dad’s best freind Joong. Joong is on the run from someone. Stalker-ish, someone is watching you both closely. Mutual Masturbation, but reader is unaware of him watching her. Cum play.Mentions of alcohol.Nipple play.Dirty thoughts and fantasies. Pet names (honey, baby). Sir kink. Hongjoong is in his late 30s and he is nasty while reader is only 23 (Oopsie, but enjoy). Mildly Noncon (no permissions were asked).

Tag list OPEN! - let me know if you want to be tagged for this Kinktober list

“Cheers to 23!!!” all your friends screamed as tequila shot glasses clunked together, celebrating you. You had just turned 23, and what better way to celebrate than throwing a huge party at Havana, the finest club with the best cocktails and liquor in town?

Your dad, Seonghwa, had suggested a birthday yatch trip, butyatches you can do anytime, your dad owning a big private one. You can’t celebrate your 23rd with all your friends in town just whenever, so you politely declined, asking to postpone it for another day. But there was one more reason as well.

Your friend group has a tradition, kinda stupid, but spicy. The birthday girl has three tasks for the evening:

First, drink the Havana exclusive, El Fuego del Caribe, a signature cocktail known for its fiery blend of rum, chili-infused tequila, and a splash of tropical juices.

Second, engage a stranger in conversation and buy them a drink.

Third, get a picture clicked while having some kind of fun together, the kind of fun you can decide.

Being the least experienced with relationships in the friend group, this turned out to be a daunting task for you, especially the third one.

Anyhow, this birthday girl pulled them all off.

The intense yet exciting task list started with you approaching the bartender, plopping yourself at the bar, and winking at him. That’s how you ask for Havana’s exclusive, and when he winks back, consider your order taken. That was easy, first task, done!.You downed the drink at once, your friends watching from their table. The alcohol burned your throat as it went down, sweet and spicy with a sour aftertaste.

Now, time to catch a stranger for a fun night. As your eyes wandered around the club, checking out some sexy guys, you spotted this man eyeing you from the other end of the bar. You threw him an alluring smile as you studied him. He looked to be in his late 30s, well-built, with a left brow slit, tattooed arms, and to seal the deal, a very inviting devilish smirk. An overall yummy demeanor.

Let’s go with him.

He came and sat down next to you, and a very engaging, flirty conversation swooned you both into a small bubble of your own. You learned his name was Hongjoong, and that he had just come back into town after almost a decade in the States.

Hongjoong was captivated by you the moment he took a sip of the drink you bought him. Your charm, the way you carried the conversation, and just how beautiful you were, it all aligned perfectly with what he desired in a woman.

After hours of talking and throwing back shot after shot, things were a bit hazy for him, but one thing was crystal clear: he was hooked. He flirted shamelessly, and you only encouraged it, turning playful teasing into something more when you grabbed his arm and led him to the private room, ready to check off the last item on your list.

Ahhh… the fun you both had.

—

Waking up with a throbbing headache, you vaguely remembered being dropped off at home by your friends, Hongjoong’s face flashing across your mind as a smile crept up.

He was perfect. But there was a teeny tiny problem, you couldn’t remember what exactly you both did, or if you actually took the picture.

Feeling a little sad that you might not see him again, you walked into the living room where breakfast was being served, only to see a familiar face. Hongjoong, sitting right there with your dad in the living room, deeply engrossed in conversation.

Why is he here? Did I drag him back home? Why are he and Dad talking like they're best friends?

As you nervously approached them, their eyes landed on you. Hongjoong’s face paled, the blood rushing from his face as his eyes widened, mirroring your nervous expression. He recovered himself quickly.

“Ahh, Y/n! You’re up. Hongjoong, meet my daughter. Y/N, this is my best friend Hongjoong, he's finally back from the States after almost a decade,” Seonghwa introduced, oblivious to the fact that you two had already met.

“Hello, Y/n.” Hongjoong said, his voice firm, almost neutral, but with a tiny smirk on his lips as he extended his hand for you to shake.

“Hi, nice to meet you...umm...” you took his hand, unsure of what to call him.

“You can call me Hongjoong.” he assured you, his grip firm, sending jolts of electricity through your body. Pulling your hand back slightly, you went to sit at the breakfast table, sneaking glances at Hongjoong from time to time, his gaze reciprocating with equal... intensity?

Wow... I slept with Dad's best friend? Why the hell can’t I remember what we did last night?

“Y/n, about the yatch trip. Why not turn it into a little get-together?” Seonghwa asked, to which you slightly nodded. “Hongjoong, you should join us too. My princess is 23 now, and you're back after so long. We should catch up with all the boys, and you need to meet their kids as well.” he announced excitedly.

Damn. This is going to be the end of me. The thought crossed both your and Hongjoong’s minds.

—

The yacht was big enough to fit everyone who showed up, which was a relief. There were plenty of activities and services, so the trip seemed like it would be fun. Luckily, even with the crowd, you managed to get a room for yourself. After the chaos of your birthday night, some alone time was exactly what you needed. Now, settled in one of the small but cozy rooms at the back of the yacht, you finally had the privacy you wanted.

The only problem? It was right next to Hongjoong’s.

Night fell, and everyone retired to their rooms. Hongjoong stood on the deck, the memories of that night still fresh in his mind as he glanced at the photo you had taken on his phone during the heat of the moment. When he met Seonghwa the next day, he had no clue you were his daughter, he didn’t even know Seonghwa had a daughter, let alone a beautiful twenty-three-year-old one.

But what will they do about this? Will they try to harm you for being associated with him? Are they here, watching him and you?

~ your birthday night ~

The music was in sync with your heartbeat as your eyes locked with Hongjoong, his devilish smirk igniting desire and not helping with the wetness building down south. Leaning in close, your breath hot against his ear, you whispered, "Let's go somewhere private."

Making your way through the sweaty mush of drunk people on the dance floor, you led him to a secluded room. The door clicked shut as you turned to him, slowly unbuttoning your top, letting the fabric fall from your shoulders. This was your kind of fun.

Hongjoong’s gaze darkened as you grabbed his drink, took a sip, and spilled it down your chest. The liquid covered your skin, trailing down your boobs, giving them a glistening look that made Hongjoong’s mouth water.

"Clean me up, sir." you teased, watching his eyes burn with desire. That “sir” in your angelic sweet voice had him down bad for you.

Without hesitation, he pulled you by the waist, your body crashing into his, sending sparks through you. He lowered his head, his tongue flicking over the trail of alcohol on your skin, his large hands busy squeezing your ass. You gasped softly, your hands tangling in his hair as he licked and sucked your nipples, and Hongjoong sucked hard, releasing the nipple with a pop sound.

"Tastes so sweet, like a cherry, baby." he said, continuing his licks.

The sensation, his words sent sparks through your body, as he was busy cleaning the remnants of liquor off. His mouth was hot, his tongue teasing, tasting you in a way that left you craving more, needing more. You gasped, tugging at his hair, the heat between you rising.

Adding to the moment, you reached for your phone, accidentally grabbing his and snapping a picture, interrupting the moment. "Oops, wrong phone," you smiled at him innocently. "Will you keep it for me, sir?" Your innocent request earned an amused smirk from him.

"Only if you promise to see me again." Hongjoong teased, smirking, the tension between you far from over and only left you both craving for more.

~~

Was he regretting that night? No.

He definitely felt a connection, an intense one, the first time he laid eyes on you in Havana. Your playful, banter-ish conversation was a gentle push toward those unannounced feelings his heart was welcoming, and the night in that private room definitely sealed the deal.

He was more curious about what was going on in your mind.

But knowing your feelings might open a can of worms that he wasn’t ready for.

And if they found out about your associations with him... What would they do to you?

As he walked back to his tiny room, almost as if his prayers were answered, soft moans caught his ears, halting him in his tracks.

"Joong... aa... I need you," you moaned, your fingers rubbing against your dripping cunt, trying to relieve some of the ache, your back to the door. The whole evening had been tense with Hongjoong in your vicinity, and it took everything in you not to jump his bones. But...

Why has he been distant? Is he avoiding me? Does he not want this? What’s his deal?

Pushing those questions aside, you focused on the pleasure, recalling the night of your birthday. The way his tongue moved on your chest, the way he sucked your tits—it all felt so vivid. Suddenly, everything felt hotter, thick drops of sweat coating your forehead despite the air conditioning set to its coldest.

Hongjoong, watching you pleasuring yourself through the glass door of the cabin, curtains slightly pushed aside, was torn with dilemma, as he’d definitely felt someone watching him the whole evening.

Should I go in? She definitely wants this... She does feel something, right? But what if they find out?

What if they come to this town looking for me? Will Y/N’s life be in danger? Will they come after her too?

"Joong, please... touch me, sir..." you whimpered, your fingers rubbing harder against your cunt, waves of pleasure coursing through your body. Your left hand squeezed your tits, the same ones Hongjoong had once covered with sweet kisses, unaware that you were being watched.

Hongjoong’s dick hardened at the mouthwatering sight, forming a tent in his pants. Shit, he needed release, and he needed it now. His hands automatically went to his clothed member, touching and rubbing, trying to soothe himself.

Checking to see if the hallway was clear, he pulled his throbbing cock out, hoping to relieve that ache, even just a tiny bit, as your moans provided music to his ears. His mind took him down the rabbit hole where his dirty fantasies lived, away from the world. Your taste still fresh in his mind, his pace quickened. The idea of bending you over and fucking deep inside, with his girthy dick exploring your insides, was something he desperately needed to happen.

He covered his mouth as dangerous groans threatened to escape his lips while his hand worked on his throbbing cock, rubbing ferociously. His eyes flicked to you—the sight of your lips between your teeth, eyes tightly shut, sweat dripping off your face—pushed him closer to the edge.

Your fingers quickened against your cunt as you rubbed harder and faster, breathless moans leaving your lips, traveling to Hongjoong outside the door, pushing him over the edge as he came hard in his hand, slick dripping down his legs. Your fast movements also pushed you off the edge as you came undone on the fluffy sheets.

Hongjoong and you both breathed deeply, trying to recover from the intense high, and just when the timing couldn’t have been worse, he heard footsteps approaching, heading toward your rooms at the back of the ship.

To save both you and himself from getting caught, he entered your room, causing you to freeze at his sudden entrance, all your actions coming to a painful stop. Your face turned cherry red. Embarrassed.

Was he watching me this whole time? Fuck! Fuck! I even called his name out loud. He definitely heard that... Fuck my life! Your mind was a mess, embarrassment taking the best of you as the older male stood in front of you, wet stains in his pants showing that he had cum.

"Y/N, stop... someone’s coming," Hongjoong said, warning you about someone approaching the back of the ship. "Pretend you’re sleeping," he added as he gently laid you on the bed, tucking you under the covers. He quickly hid behind the door, the room dark enough that no one outside would see him there.

The footsteps came to a halt in front of your door, lingered for a few moments, then walked away.

Who could be up at this time of night? Hongjoong thought to himself. Ah, probably one of the kids. He decided to check to make sure the path was clear, and to his surprise, no one was there. Hmm... was my mind playing games with me?

“All clear,” he announced as he turned towards you, hand still holding the door knob, ready to leave. He took one final glance at your sleeping figure, about to step out.

“Are you gonna leave me already, sir?” your voice dripped with innocence as you sat up on the bed, propped on your knees, looking almost like an angel fallen from heaven. A request Hongjoong so desperately wanted to fulfill but couldn’t, as his eyes flicked to the window behind you, a red cross plastered on it.

Shit! Are they here already? Is this them telling me they’re watching me?

I need to get out of here, and fast. And I need to make sure they don’t harm her, he thought to himself.

“Sorry, angel,” he said, gripping your cheeks and pecking your lips. “I can’t put your life in danger.” He lingered there for a second before backing off and leaving the room, disappearing into the darkness.

What did he mean by he can’t put my life in danger? Is someone after him? Why the fuck did he have to kiss me... if he has no intention of being with me?

What is going on, Joong? What are you hiding?

~ ~ Chérie ☆ signin’ off

DISCLAIMER: This is totally fictional and not a real depiction of the ATEEZ members. It's all just for fun only so please don’t take anything seriously and keep the mood light around here.

© ShixCherie.

[two-white-butterflies]

violets for roses | c16

Description: Charles breaks up with you in search for higher ground. Where he realizes that he needs you beside him in order to truly win.

Pairing: charles leclerc/neurosurgeon!reader

Rating: Teen [jealousy, angst]

When he told you that he needed space - you gave it to him willingly, without any doubts or questions - because you knew deep inside that he'd come crawling back - that you couldn't live without each other. But when he wanted to make that space permanent? It caught you off guard.

"What do you mean?" you could feel your throat threaten to leak green bile. He seemed calm and composed from the other side of the call - a complete opposite of you. "I don't think that we're going to work in the long term, bebe." he dare used a nickname.

A small shudder escaped your lips.

"I don't understand," you shook your head - playing with the bracelet that he gifted you. "I want to focus on the championship." he began to explain his side of the story, but you couldn't help interrupt him. "Are you calling me a distraction?" you bite your lower lip.

You felt stupid.

Stupid because you weren't aware of his feelings. Unaware of the storm that was brewing inside of his mind. "I'm calling myself easily distracted," he defended you - knowing that half of his heart still belonged to the woman inside of you. "I-I think you're too good for me. You deserve someone who can stand beside you - hold your hand through accomplishments. That's not me." he prefaced.

While you were saving lives - he was toying with his own.

"Look at the future, bebe. Can you see a person who's barely there? I know you - I know that you want to be perfect. You dream about those white fences, a four bedroom house, kids that go to school - I can't give you that." he persuaded you, knowing deep inside his heart that he could give you that.

He could give you the family that you wanted - but he wanted to fix his life first. He wanted to make a name for himself.

"Well, there's no use in trying to force you to do something." you hum, wiping the tears away from your eyes.

"Goodbye, Leclerc." you hang up.

Charles_Leclerc: A single picture, yet it gives me a million emotions. I enjoyed being with you. I enjoyed drinking martinis by the beach and rolling down the sand dunes in Dubai. I enjoyed dancing in Ibiza, and singing down the streets of Los Angeles. I had fun, and I loved you - but good things must come to an end. Thank you, doctora. ❤️

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dr_yn_official: I'll be getting over you, my whole life. Merci du fond du coeur. @Charles_Leclerc

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CHARLES LECLERC AND GIRLFRIEND'S BREAKUP TO MATTY HEALY AND TAYLOR SWIFT SPLIT. (by deuxmoi)

Deuxmoi: Now I got this from one of his girlfriend's close friend, that Charles wanted to focus on the championship while she wanted to focus more on their relationship. A few months before their public breakup, they had a little break (now they didn't specify how long the 'break' lasted but they broke up officially before they got back together).

Unknown: That's shitty, because isn't Charles 25? He's old enough to know that a person should focus on what their girlfriend needs.

Deuxmoi: Yeah! And apparently, he was very 'fuck off' manner and he was all about himself. He was always talking about what he wanted and what he needed.

Unknown: Oh my god!

Deuxmoi: Now I'm gonna start this off by saying that I'm not taking any sides, but my source told me that Y/N was bending over backwards to provide what he needed and wanted. At the end (he spoke up about their faults by phone call by the way) - at the end she just went 'alright i don't wanna make our relationship a favor to you' and broke up with him.

Unknown: She broke up with him?

Deuxmoi: Yes, she did.

"Are you alright?" your co-worker places a hand on your shoulder, seeing that you weren't able to finish the surgery. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have stepped into the OR knowing that I'm like this." you sigh, leaning into the cold metal chair. You've seen the tweets about you. You've seen the hashtags on twitter. It wasn't helping.

"It's okay, you're the best surgeon in the hospital - and Dr. Alawi has finished the operation. No harm done - but I will be telling HR." the nurse warns you, and you answer with a nod. Fair is fair. "It's just hard getting over a breakup," you admit - wiping the sweat off your forehead. " -especially when it's with someone I see a future with."

She sits down beside you, offering a bottle of water.

"I don't want to ask anything personal, but if you need someone. I'll be here to help you - I'm sure that you'll see someone better." she comforted. "Lots of fish in the sea." she joked, earning a small laugh.

She glances at you - seeing the sad look on your face.

"Guess what," she smiled and you turned to look at her. "What?" you inquired - watching her open her phone. "You should go on a date, something that'll take your mind off him." she offered, showing you a picture of her cousin. "He's also a neurosurgeon. Dr. Pritchett, you'll love him." she smiled, browsing through his instagram posts.

A sigh escapes your mouth. Anything to get rid of Charles.

"Give me the date, I'll be there." you tell her, and she begins typing on her phone - presumably messaging the man.

The friendship between you and Dr. Pritchett grew with every event that he invited you to join. Soon enough, you find yourself tolerating his company - often leaning into his touch willingly.

"This institution was founded by my grandfather, Mr. Patel. It's helped so much patients that suffer from brain related diseases. I can't imagine a Monaco without it." your date boasted, touring the entire crowd around the tapestries hung around the hospital.

"The number of sponsors and volunteers grow with every month, now thanks to Formula One collaborating with us - we help a lot more people." he chuckled, hands rubbing comforting circles on your back - you almost forgot that your ex-boyfriend was in the crowd.

"It's beautiful here, I didn't expect it to be a hospital." Toto complimented, taking a slow sip of his champagne. He was one of the hospital's biggest donator. Truly, a nice guy. "We wanted it to feel like home." you add - showing them around the new building.

Your eyes trail towards the man beside him - Charles Leclerc.

"It feels like that," he hummed - a small frown on his face. You were getting on his nerves now - and so was the man beside you. "Most of our patients are children, the adults are in the other wing." Dr. Pritchett added, glancing at you. "We tried to make it as colorful as possible, but it's a hospital - decorum is needed." you hum, fingers dancing along the rim of your glass.

Why couldn't you stop thinking about him?

officialyour_name: the annual st. luke's gala. thank you so much to @formulaone and @scuderiaferrari for sponsoring tonight's event. also to the f1 grid who are in full attendance!

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Charles had a lot of guts marching towards you.

"Hey," he breathed seeing that sad pout on your face. "Hey," you smiled at him - surprised to see him walking towards you with such bravery. Didn't he walk out of the door a few months ago?

"You're in a new relationship, huh?" he chuckled bitterly, sitting down on the wooden chair beside you. "Well, it's not a relationship - it's more of a friendship." you admit, doctors and formula one drivers have a lot in common - they both didn't have time for relationships.

Dr. Pritchett saw you as eye-candy. Something to pass time around.

"That relaxes me a bit," he hummed - letting the alcohol take full control of the situation. "I regret breaking up with you, to be honest." he scratched his nose, fearing your response. "Charles, don't." you warn him a disapproving stare.

You already learned from the past - you already let go of your wings in order to fly. He didn't have the right to take that away. He didn't have the right to take away your independence.

"I can't stop thinking about you, and I want to get back - together, bebe." he used the same term of endearment, waiting patiently for your reply. "You can't be serious," you scoff - feeling the eyes on you.

"I'll give you time, but you know how to find me." he stood up.

and you'll always find him.

(ONE YEAR LATER)

officialyour_name: never thought i'd be sharing a candid shot, but here we are ❤️

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"I can never seem to get rid of you," you chuckle - laying on the sand and watching him attempt to make a sand-castle. It's been six months since you last gave him a chance. Twelve months since that fateful gala. You've never been happier. "Well, you're jealous because my sand castles are beautiful." he boasted, filling it with water.

"Sure, bebe." you teased.

He's changed a lot. He's more honest with his feelings. He talks to you about his problems - instead of keeping it to himself.

He wasn't a good boyfriend before - but he was a great boyfriend now.

Charles_Leclerc: We gave it a bit of thinking, and we realized that we look better together. I realized that I'm better with her. Cheers to dancing in Ibiza, singing down L.A, slipping down Dubai, and drinking Martinis by the beach. @officialyour_name

248 comments 724,192 likes

soldforparts12: YES! I KNEW THAT THIS WOULD HAPPEN

officialyour_name: I LOVE YOU

officialyour_name: We look better in RED. Missed you, drama king.

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[yanderes-galore]

for rq period: yandere tmnt03 donnie concept?

I'll try my best! He isn't as fleshed out as the others in 2003... So I'll try my best ^^; Sorry if it's vague, I'm more well-versed in 2012 and Rise.

Yandere! 2003! Donatello Concept

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Controlling behavior, Stalking, Tracking, Jealousy, Kidnapping, Cameras, Picture taking, Delusional behavior, Isolation, Drugging, Forced relationship.

Donatello is one who puts those around him before himself.

He often neglects his own needs at times just so he can care for his loved ones.

He's the smartest of the four turtles, a clever inventor and tactician.

He values education and science more than his actual ninjutsu studies at times.

He's a pacifist and isn't as physically resilient as his brothers from what I've seen.

Yet he's still a decent fighter with his quick wit and planning.

He always comes prepared, always tries to think things through...

Similar to his other iterations, he would try to plan things out in his obsession.

Things need to be perfect to make a plan work for him.

Donatello is often gentle and calm, never wanting to cause unnecessary harm.

He rarely loses his temper and I imagine this version of Donnie isn't all that... confrontational.

Not many of them are, but still....

The only time this turtle is ever violent or aggressive is when he's mutated into a large monster.

That's it.

For the most part... You being his obsession isn't that bad.

As long as you're okay with mutant turtles.

He honestly just seems like he'd be such a respectable sweetheart to you as his obsession.

Although he does seem to know... too much?

As expected, Donatello would research his obsession like they're his newest project.

As sweet as he is, he's keeping track of everything you do.

He's not possessive since he's usually against confrontation.

However... He is obsessive and protective.

Donatello knows all sorts of things about you.

He knows more than any of your closest friends, in fact, at some point he'll know more than your own family...

Or even yourself.

Donatello soaks in information like a sponge.

The moment he learns something new about you, he's noting that down like his life depends on it.

Now... Donatello would have all sorts of information about you.

He has a notebook or two dedicated to you.

He just lacks the courage and confidence to actually do anything with said info other than stutter and stare.

Donatello is socially awkward.

He's caring and attentive towards you and your well-being...

Yet struggles on how to express his overwhelming feelings towards you.

It's not like he can tell you about his notebooks...

Or why he knows all of this info....

While you're unaware, Donatello gets to work with scraping up any sort of info he can find on you.

He stalks you everywhere.

He puts trackers on your clothes, belongings, car...

This turtle has your entire routine memorized.

Donatello has to be careful when speaking with you as his obsession continues.

He may accidentally say something he shouldn't know...

Only to make you both awkwardly stare at one another before trying to change the conversation.

Donatello tries so hard to impress you.

He gets into all the things you like, he builds new inventions and gadgets just for you to look at them.

Just a warning, if you take a phone from him, you are definitely being tracked now.

Donatello just seems so socially awkward and relaxed when you speak to him.

You have no clue how unhinged he is behind the scenes.

Donatello stays up late at night to track you, research you, watch you...

But you're oblivious.

You just see him tired and think he's overworking himself again.

Being cared for by you just adds to his obsession.

Donatello no doubt sets up cameras in spots you frequent and is always recording for himself.

That and he has secret photos he took of you at night, keeping them tucked away in his room.

Donatello is infatuated with you.

It's quite obvious to him... The notebooks, footage, pictures, tracking...

His habit of leaving home to follow you....

Donatello knows he doesn't deserve you.

Why would you?

He's a mutant turtle, you're a human.

You may not view him as a monster... yet you certainly wouldn't date him.

That breaks his heart...

But part of him still wishes to believe you can.

He can't stop thinking about such a fantasy, actually...

He dreams of it... dreams of you...!

He imagines protecting you, dating you, your praise, hugs, kisses...

He just imagines what it would be like to love you.

Such a thought nearly drives him insane.

While he is normally calm and able to control himself...

Imagine if he snaps and just decides to take you away.

In his delusional mind, Donatello thinks you'll understand.

In reality you won't... You don't understand his twisted mind.

Donatello is desperate for your love.

Desperate to the point he slips something in your food or drink... just to catch you when you fall into his arms unconscious...

Then he locks you somewhere no one will look... surrounded by pictures he took and cameras watching your every move...

With ropes around your body as you lay on a makeshift bed.

It may not be much now...

But he's planned out everything!

Your new relationship (which he just forced upon you) will begin just as he's dreamed it!

Except... Donatello needs you on your best behavior first...

He knows you may be nervous about your first date together... yet he'll try to compensate!

Your first date is tied up in a sewer surrounded by pictures of you that you didn't know existed.

He's so delusional when he has you.

He doesn't understand why you're so scared.

It's just him!

You know him, right? (You thought you did.)

He's your best friend! Soon to be boyfriend, actually!

He can't wait to start.

He can't wait to hold you, touch you, kiss you, love you...

But he must be patient!

He'll take things slow for you...

You may be nervous and scared now... But don't worry...!

You'll warm up to him eventually... Then he can continue to make things perfect between you! Just like in his fantasies!

[ferrarifan4ever]

Oscar's parking space

Oscar Piastri x Fem!Wife!Reader

(This is quite a quick one, primarily because I'm bored)

Warnings: Swearing, Marriage, mention of hospitals{if I missed anything please tell me}

Also,this hasn't been proofread soooooo...

================================================

Y/N had known Oscar basically all of her life, as friends, of course. That was until they turned fourteen when Oscar fell down the stairs and sprained his foot (none of this is true. I think). Him, being the dramatic teenager he was he thought he was going to die. So as he lay there on a random hospital bed in the A&E, [WHAT'S IT CALLED IN AUSTRALIA???] he confesed that he loved you. He didn't end up dying,so no suprise there,but you did end up getting married. Let's skip to the present day shall we?

You were sat in the McLaren motorhome waiting for Oscar to return from his interviews, occasionally twiddling with your rings. You got startled out of your trance by the very man who put those rings on your finger, you glanced up and there he was in all his gorgeous glory. "Take a picture, it'll last longer." Your cheeks blushed red, unaware how long you'd been staring at him. "Ok...let's go!"

================================================

Y/N and Oscar. Against the world. (That would make a banging movie ngl.) As you two walked out of the paddock, occasionally stopping so Oscar could take a picture with a fan, you quickly arrived in the car park. You turned the corner and went to hop into Oscar car, except,it wasn't there. There was no car. This was Oscar's parking space and he made that VERY clear to literally everyone. He swiftly grasped his phone and rung Zac.

"Heya mate,um....yeah. Yeah,I know. Zac. Mate lemme speak. Yeah okay so, basically,my cars gone.Zac,if I knew where it was,would I be calling you right now? Oh shut up,your not funny. Yeah, well how are me and my wife supposed to get back to the hotel. We ain't walking. Okay. Cheers, thanks mate. Yep bye. Love you."

You stared at your his with a confused look on your face."Why'd you say I love you?"

"Because Zac hates when I do it,and it's really funny." It's times like these you wonder why you ever married Oscar."Right so what are they doing about the car?" You said while side-eyeing the empty spot."Oh yeah,their sending out a search party for it. However in the meantime,we have um...a replacement car." As he said this George drove past in a Mercedes branded golf buggy. Oh shit. Where you ridding in the golf buggy? "Hi Oscar and Y/N! I'm your knight in shining Merc." Fuck no, was the exact thought running through your minds. Oh Welp. Might as well.

You hopped onto the back of the buggy and called Oscar on. "For the record George,I hate this." But hey,the end of the day,it was an okay car.

[ilikekidsshows]

This is a longer one, sorry 😅

About that ask you replied to about Marinette's parents. I didn't grow up in a healthy household and i struggle to form a properly informed opinion on Marinette's parents in all this mess.

Cause clearly they are very loving, caring, and supportive, but they aren't perfect either. They are realistically human. They have blind spots, didnt actually RAISE her apparently when she does things wrong, and hardly give Marinette any boundaries or consequences to face, which now evolved into her neither being able to handle anything not going her way nor having to actually take people into consideration and go through with improving on the things she said she should.

Im pretty sure Marinette was a very friendly child who didn't cause too many problems, if at all, so now that she's a complicated teenager who actually needs some boundaries and discipline they dont know how to handle it. Thats the picture im getting. Not to mention that they don't know Marinette is Ladybug so they have no idea what's caused all these extreme changes in their daughter and how to accommodate to properly help her.

But in my eyes, without the whole Ladybug thing, this is still a pretty normal and realistic portrayal of a modern family, so Marinette is simply a normal ass kid. She's clearly spoiled to a solid degree and emotionally shielded the way most middle class kids from central Europe are. Just because her family isn't perfect doesn't it mean she's being abused or her parents are bad. For me, they are a realistic healthy family. Whatever faults her parents have are pretty common things parents do wrong.

But this now raises the question for me how exactly to go about Marinette's family. Obviously her parents didn't to everything right in their parenting, so those flaws of Marinette can be traced back to them while Marinette at the same time SHOULD normally STILL be asked to grow out of it the way any normal teenager should, it's just slightly more challenging.

But then I see discussions that take it way too far imo but I don't know where exactly to draw the line.

It is correct that Tom and Sabine for example seem to know very little about their daughter's friend group to the point that they just let Sabrina into Marinette's room. The common argument I see being raised here is that Sabine is neglective because she doesn't know that Sabrina isn't Marinette's friend.

Now this doesn't feel quite right to me. Marinette's parents seem to be pretty much unaware that their daughter was bullied in school which unfortunately isn't at all uncommon. When the parents are neither told by the child or the school, then how are they supposed to know? The most they seem to know is that Marinette has a hard time with Chloé, but I never had the impression that they know how serious this was. Marinette sure was never shown to ever voice any of that.

So Sabine thinking Sabrina is Marinette's friend is a fair enough assumption in my eyes. I remember back when I was 12-13, forming friendship in a collective class is alot easier when you're a kid. Kids just go with the flow like that and become friends in 10 seconds even if they aren't spending much time with each other directly. Forming connections tends gets more difficult as one grows older.

I don't think at that age parents can be faulted for not keeping track of all their kid's friendships. Sabrina running up to Sabine and claiming she's Marinette's friend and Sabine believing her is honestly nothing too special.

What I take issue with, though, is that Sabine just let Sabrina go into Marinette's room ALONE. That a parent, imo, truly shouldn't do.

And yet, one still wouldn't call her a BAD parent for that, right? It's very flawed, but obviously Marinette also continues to rely on her parents doing that with the amount of times Alya just gets to come and go however she please, even with Marinette not being there, despite Marinette knowing Alya merely year at this point. Way less than Sabrina for example.

There is this persistent grey area here that I can't quite place. Marinette's parents are very obviously very trusting, but the way the show portrays it seems to border on neglective imo, but it's based in their daughter just getting free reign most of the time so Marinette can do shit in her room and leave for long periods of time for example that parents should normally check on their kids for.

So, at the same time, is it actually neglect? Thanks to being Ladybug, it is Marinette who has pulled more and more away from her parents and since season 4 is doing so to honestly very unnecessary degrees. There is little reason for why Marinette constantly locks herself and Alya into her room and doesn't spend much time with her parents when all that Marinette is doing in there is panicking and not doing something actually productive most of the time anyway. You may as well just spend time with your parents instead of crying to Alya that you supposedly CANT (while taking over Alya's life and being the actual reason why SHE cant)

Teenagers at Marinette's age starting to pull away from their parents is nothing uncommon. So I'm pretty sure that's just how it looks like for her parents. Marinette is starting to grow up and doesn't prioritize spending time or sharing her life with them as much anymore.

Can't pretend like that's not a sad truth parents have to deal with, so the kid's friends are trusted by the parents to know their kid in ways they don't anymore.

Marinette has very loving and caring parents who don't push her to involve them or share what she doesn't want to. Now here is the question. While this is neglective to a degree and Marinette does seem to be affected badly by it, is this necessarily something her parents are doing objectively WRONG? From their perspective, their daughter is growing up and so busy that they aren't much of a priority in her life. She's pulling more and more away and her parents try to adjust to that supportively without being given context as any parent must.

Clearly the created distance has Marinette now incorrectly believe that her parents aren't actually a real support system anymore, the way Marinette didnt even try to reach out in Kwamis Choice and her thinking she has lost EVERYTHING at the end of season 4 and then proceeding to act like she doesn't think she truly has anyone or anything in season 5 too.

Now, is Marinette thinking that she has NOTHING at the end of season 4, and still seeming to think so in season 5, something her parents failed at teaching her better?

When a kid starts pulling away from their supportive family, because they are so used to having them, and ends up convincing themselves that their parents dont count anymore as support because it isnt as perfect and easy as they'd like, is this a failure of the parents for not sitting their child down to remind them that the kid isn't the emotional equivalent of an orphan now the moment they have to do something alone?

Or is this simply a normal thing a teenager has to realize on their own? That just because the loving parents aren't a perfect support system anymore, doesn't it mean the kid just gets to disregard them fully as an option the way Marinette constantly does?

Because, well, this IS what it constantly feels like for me when it comes to Marinette.

When Marinette takes offense with her parents not unconditionally believing her all the time, is it really always her parents fault for not having raised her to handle push back better, or is it also just a natural part of growing up that you have to get over yourself and realize that your parents too need context for the situations you're in (e.g. Adoration) because growing up means you're parents shouldn't just handwave all the accountability away you potentially have to take now because you're not an 8 year old anymore and capable of genuine wrongdoing?

Yes, her parents definitely failed a solid bit in regards of leaving Marinette emotionally immature and unprepared when it comes to pushback, criticism, or considerations of others.

But to what degree are her parents actually WRONG in wanting Marinette to learn it for herself now because that's normally how it done?

Do her parents REALLY have to sit her 14-15 year old ass down and teach her that other people have feelings and lives of their own? That reality exists outside of her head and feelings? Or should a teenager be expected to learn that themselves, especially one that's so busy and involved in everything as Marinette? Cause it actually seems to me that her being Ladybug caused her stunted development in this regard. Because being Ladybug always serves as the right excuse to always demand and expect the others to do the learning cause she's "too stressed" and "too justified as leader who doesn't owe anyone anything, but is owed everything herself cause she says so".

It's seems that it's rather that being Ladybug caused the damage in Marinette's development which her parent can't know about, and not that her parents are particularly failing by not holding their daughter's hand all through growing up even more to spoon-feed her every bit of development she should grow into now to make sure its as pleasant and easy as possible?

In my opinion, from teenage age onwards it's not the parents' job to tell their children at any uncomfortable or challenging occasion what's right and wrong and do all the work in the child's personal development into a young adult. And isn't that what Marinette's parents are being criticised for anyway? That they don't let their daughter face disappointment, discipline, and struggles because it makes her upset? But now they are in the wrong for wanting to have their daughter learn and figure things out in their own, but fully intend on always being there for her in every way when she needs it?

There definitely IS a complicated grey area here where these two parenting styles badly overlapped and caused problems.

Tom and Sabine DO give Marinette way too much free reign cause it badly clashes with how little discipline, rules, boundaries, and consideration she was raised to actually having to oblige to as part of living with other people.

Marinette was not well prepared for the freedom she now has, but looking at it in general, the problem seems much more to be Marinette being Ladybug, and not necessarily that she's a teenager who lacks refined emotional intelligence because she grew up shielded and cuddled. If Marinette had a normal life, she would have some more trouble growing out of it, but it's not like her parents ruined her.

I think it's that Marinette is Ladybug that is to blame here. Because that's how she was put in a position where she learned that she just needs to stomp her foot, scream, cry, or use her titel to make it so that it's always everyone else who has to do the learning and not her. Marinette's concerning entitlement grew through being Ladybug and not tolerating anything but having all the support, resources, and everyone beneath her in the hierarchy who must submit to her will or else she cant function.

Whatever problems her parents caused in her upbringing should have been easy enough to grow out of. It's LADYBUG who stunted that development because Marinette learned that she has the option to just demand that everyone has to cater to her instead. That is not her parents fault, but it always leaves me at the same problem of not knowing how to properly dissect and discuss what blame Tom and Sabine objectively have in this.

---

This is a very insightful and interesting essay, Anon. When it comes to Marinette’s parents, it's really hard to call them “bad parents”, because they're really good at many things that come to parenting. They're supportive, they respect Marinette's space and privacy, they believe in her ability to handle herself and Marinette clearly feels safe with them. And you're also right that it's extremely difficult for them to guide Marinette learning social-emotional skills now that she's a willful teenager and wouldn't be receptive to her parents “correcting her behavior” if they even knew there was something to correct.

I also don't think Marinette's parents can see all the issues with Marinette’s conduct. She is a very “easy” child; she's polite, she respects authority and doesn't get into purposeful mischief. She's the exact kind of child adults don't worry about, so they don't have to constantly keep an eye on her. Especially since a lot of her problems come to the forefront as Ladybug, a whole new part of her life her parents aren’t involved in.

The thing here is that 14-year-olds not knowing that other people have feelings or how to deal with disappointments is exactly why early childhood education is now emphasizing the teaching of these skills so much. For a long time, there was a belief that kids learn social-emotional skills naturally and there's no need to purposefully teach them, because kids will “get it” when they're “old enough to understand”. Except that we have now discovered that they don't, in fact, just naturally “get it”. These skills need to be taught in early childhood, starting from simple ideas like “your friend is crying because you took their toy, don’t do that again” and moving up from there. And the only way to teach these things in a purposeful way is to put your small kids with other small kids and let them do small kid things, even if it results in someone ending up crying, especially if someone ends up crying, because learning to deal with your own emotional responses and other people having emotional reactions to your actions is, in fact, an essential life and relationship skill. The theory of mind (the understanding that other people have thoughts and feelings that can differ from your own) is something that preschoolers are expected to learn and should get support in learning if they don't.

I’m saying Marinette should already know this stuff. Her parents and possible kindergarten teacher should have taught her almost a decade ago.

However, I don’t disagree with your assertion that being Ladybug is why these common problems with Marinette’s conduct are such a big issue for her relationships now. Because her upbringing neglected to teach her essential social-emotional skills, and she’s been shoved into a position of not just power, but absolute power where no one is in a position to question her, she’s now a nightmare boss who expects everyone else to be fully committed to making the broken system she’s running run smoothly while she comes up with some nonsense project to keep busy so that she has the excuse to take her frustrations out on everyone beneath her.

If Marinette was just constantly ditching her friends so that she could do something relating to her love quest, I’m pretty sure the most severe, realistic consequences for her friends would just be them thinking she doesn’t want to hang out, feeling bummed and no longer inviting her. Marinette being in a position of leadership both exacerbates her social-emotional ineptitude and makes its consequences more severe, because now they’re facing dangerous situations and the leadership only doesn’t care if they get hurt, but sometimes actively hurts them for the sake of achieving some other goal in the future.

We must consider that Marinette has been Ladybug for only a year, while her parents have raised her since birth. Anything being Ladybug has taught Marinette was learned on the basis her parents gave her. I don’t think this is an either-or situation. Now that she's an independent teenager, of course her parents expect her to pull away, be private and figure things out on her own. What Marinette is doing wrong now is on her, because she's the one taking on all these responsibilities, leaving others in the dark, not consulting anyone who doesn't just appease her and making decisions for others. However, this being her go-to approach shows us that her parents failed her in the past.

I think Marinette's parents are doing everything right for an older child, but I also think they were very out of their depth when Marinette was a small child. She clearly wasn't taught this stuff that has to be taught at an early age because she's now a teenager and seems to have no clue how interpersonal relationships work. Of course she's still too young to understand everything, especially romance, but she lacks basic understanding of mutual friendship as well. It just really feels like Marinette's parents have never had any expectations for her, even when she was a small child throwing a fit when she didn't get her way.

[mysoftboybensolo]

Is there an Asexual Problem in the Shadow and Bone Fandom?

(trigger warning: mentions of sexual assault)

This is something I have been pondering for a long while now, and with the recent season really made me consider it more. I want to state before going into this that I am a demisexual, in case this changes anyone’s mind of what I am about to say. Before going into my spiel, here are some terms I feel need to be explained; Asexual, meaning a person who experiences no sexual feelings or desires, not feeling sexually attracted to another; Aromantic, meaning a person who experiences little to no romantic attraction or feelings towards another; Demisexual, meaning a person who develops sexual feelings or attraction to another only after developing a close relationship, not based on first impressions or physical attributes; Allosexual, meaning a person who experiences sexual attraction of a regular basis. Now that we have that out of the way, let’s begin.

I feel as if there is an Ace problem in the Shadow and Bone fandom because it feels like everyone has things mixed up and is unaware of what the definition of asexual is, but there are a few people on here that I have interacted with, who came across more acephobic when discussing these topics. It also doesn’t help that there was a major issue with one of the writers posting a picture of two of the actors with a caption that was very, whether she meant to or not, offensive and harmful. But let’s talk about why I think there may be an ace issue in the fandom.

My first problem is how people view mainly Kaz, but also Inej. It is really bothersome when people say that they are asexual due to trauma. You can headcanon them as asexual if you have something else to back it up other than relying on trauma. Why? Because it’s harmful. Coming out to my friends and family that I was demisexual wasn’t always easy, because some immediately thought that it meant something was wrong. I was asked straight out by one person if I had been sexually assaulted and if that is the reason why I claimed I was demisexual, with someone even suggesting I go to therapy for it. This happens to people on the ace spectrum more than people think, leading to the allo-sexual people believing in the myth that being asexual means “broken” or “damaged”. It has been known to happen that a character can be both asexual and traumatized, but their sexuality shouldn’t be based on what their trauma is. Imagine asking a lesbian if they prefer women because they had a bad experience with a man. Doesn’t that sound incredibly offensive? It’s the same thing with ace-spectrum people.

Kaz and Inej do want each other, there are more than three passages which talks about their desires for each other. I personally headcanon them as demisexual, mainly because in those times the narration talks of desire, it’s always to each other, but that is just me. There is no denying that they want each other, just held back by their own traumas, and how they both want to heal in order to achieve intimacy. Quite literally, at the end of Crooked Kingdom, they are holding hands without gloves, and it shows that they are healing and want to try to further their physical relationship, and it doesn’t take away the great emotional bond that they have together.

Trauma is something that should be healed, it should not be something a person carries throughout their life, preventing them from living a healthy and happy life. Hearing people say that there can’t be anything more between them even in the future because they are asexual due to trauma feels like you don’t want them to heal from their abusive past. The fact that Kaz can’t even hold hands with her is sad, the fact that people touch Inej and she’s back at the menagerie is tragic, they should be able to have the chance to have simple intimacies with people, regardless of whether or not you want them to have sex. If your only argument as to why a character is asexual is “trauma” then you are doing it wrong.

The other problem I have is Tolya. I love Tolya, he’s a great character, and I know that many people who watch the show may have not read the books, but he is aro-ace. In Rule of Wolves, Nikolai asks Tolya why he is single, the text says “Tolya shrugged his huge shoulders. ‘I have my faith, my books, I never wanted more.’”, which is as close to saying aro-ace without saying the words (x). People have taken the tiny moment between him and Inej as something possibly romantic, and I hope the show doesn’t go that route, not just because Kanej is endgame, but because it would be stripping away the proper ace-spectrum representation the fandom needs. But what bothers me more is how fans, who may not know this, are being told by others why they don’t like the relationship will react harshly, saying that it’s not set in stone, that Tolya is whatever they want him to be.

So, a character who isn’t ace in the source material is suddenly ace, but then a different character who is ace in the source material suddenly isn’t. This is a problem. I was talking about this with another blog and their response was to say that it isn’t set in stone, how dare I try to change his sexuality, and I just don’t want Inej to have nice things. I didn’t change anything about his sexuality, it’s that way in the books, and the show never said what his sexuality is or isn’t, and this idea that Inej deserves someone who can touch her is incredibly offensive. This is similar to the one writer who made an Instagram post with Amita and Lewis, with a comment that says “Sometimes you need some skin on skin” link right here (x). This is incredibly offensive, to suggest that the only way a fulfilling relationship is through physical means, erasing Inej’s trauma, making fun to the point of being ableist of Kaz, and ignoring that Tolya is canonically aro-ace.

Diversity is incredibly important, there is no denying that, and as someone on the ace-spectrum, I always look for it, but when there is an actual character who is shown to be on the spectrum, it is incredibly disrespectful to change that just because you want to ship them with someone else. Imagine if Tolya was gay and you changed him to being straight because you liked him with a female character, that would have been bad. It’s the same thing.

In short, being ace is not a result of trauma, people should be allowed to heal, and don’t change character’s sexual/romantic preferences just for your own shipping needs.

 Tagging: @foxhellvar @darklingswhore @manikas-whims @smolandweirdwriter @lixiesbabyhands @lyannarhaegars @quillsthrills @freddycartr @freddycarterus 

[boom-bada-boom]

in a dream i meet my dead friend

“He has, / I know, gone long and far, / and yet he is the same / for the dead are changeless. / They grow no older. / It is I who have changed, / grown strange to what I was.”

— A Meeting, Wendell Berry

when albion’s need is greatest, kilgharrah tells him. when albion’s need is greatest, freya tells him. when albion’s need is greatest, arthur will rise again.

when he first heard the words, he didn’t really understand them. arthur was dead, but he’d come back eventually— though how long was anyones guess. but for the moment, arthur was dead, the king was dead, and his kingdom deserved to know what happened.

he gives himself a day, the night and the dawn and the midday and the sunset, to remain in front of the lake, blood drying and crusting over on his hands and staining his clothes. he gives himself a day frozen keeling at the lake’s edge, before pushing himself to his feet and whispering, “i promise i’ll come back.” to the still still still waters.

it takes him a long time to fulfill that promise. by then, giaus is dead, percival is dead, leon is dead, and the only reason he ever returns to camelot at all is because of gwen, old now and confined to her bed, and because he needs to see the city, the castle, one last time; carve the picture into his memories. maybe carve a spell into the castle’s stone so it survives a while yet, while he runs away from his past.

he kneels once more before the shores of avalon, and the magic heavy over him like a thick winter coat slides off to reveal beneath it a face and body just the same as the one that had knelt there decades before.

“‘when albion’s need is greatest,’” he echoes across the years, and clutches at his own arms in a farce of a hug. there is a long pause, a long moment where the sun high above is hidden behind thick clouds, a long moment where the gentle breeze stills, a long moment where the sounds of the woodland at his back fades out. it passes.

“i want to see you, arthur.” merlin admits to the still waters. “i do. but i fear what threat we will be facing in the face of it.” he smiles, rueful, grieved, so tired already, at the sparkling reflections bouncing from the mirror-like work of nature and magic before him. “i’m— tired. of fighting. i think i’d just like to be with my friends. all of them.”

it’s not really directed to arthur, anymore, he doesn’t think. it’s more an observation of his own inner psyche, something he doesn’t oft do simply because he fears what he might find in the depths.

he knows he means it though, all of his friends. in his minds eye flashes the image of morgana, young, plagued with nightmares still, but brave and kind and righteous; the look of her smile, soft and loving, as she gazed upon gwen, a bundle of flowers in one hand and the other simply holding holding holding gwen’s own; the slight smirk as she looked down on arthur, play-threats and play-fights and all the camaraderie of siblings with none of the titles; the indulgent, caring look she bestowed upon him, in the long quiet moments where she thought him unaware.

all of them.

when the castle fell, merlin thought that this, maybe, was the moment arthur returned. he had not dared step foot in the city walls since gwen’s death, but he still always kept one ear out for news regarding it. his magic, embedded into the stones, strained and tried to protect the frame and those within it, but it could only do so much from the great chasm of distance between him and camelot. he was kneeling before the lake by the end of the day. he did not get up for a week, and then another, and by the time his body seemed liable to shake apart and was held together only by his own magic, and it was abundantly clear arthur would not be returning— by then, he just slammed his fists into the earth and screamed. screamed for a life and a future robbed from him, from arthur, from all his friends. screamed because while their life was robbed because it ended, his life was robbed because there was no end for him.

after that, time seemed to pass quicker, or maybe merlin cared less. camelot, its king and its knights and all the people it contained, was soon faded into myth and legend, a true story known only in the depths of his own mind, hidden behind the ancient old carved-in image of a castle now only ruins in life. history moved around him, through him, did not care for him.

he tried helping, at first. tried using magic to make things better, mostly by healing people. merlin learned soon enough though, and began to stop trying. after the next uncountable attempt at killing him for witchcraft, he stopped trying to help that way. not long after that, every other way too.

when the twenty-first century rolled around, merlin was tired most of all. tired and sad and worn and hopeless. arthur was not coming back, he realized. not if wars and plagues and massacres and destruction was not enough to raise him.

or maybe it is because these were all things merlin could have helped, could have possibly even prevented entirely if he could’ve brought himself to interfere. when albion’s need is greatest, but obviously there would be no need if merlin could fix the problem with a snap of his fingers.

for the nth time, he considered what that could mean. what could be the cause. what great, impossible threat was out there that even merlin couldn’t defeat, that even he could not prevent?

it had been over a thousand years, and he was tired and old and bitter. angry at his still-unfinished destiny and hateful of this immortal, unending life.

perhaps then that’s why he thinks, something merlin can’t defeat? well, he couldn’t very well defeat himself.

and perhaps that is where it starts.

when albion’s need is greatest, king arthur will rise again.

merlin decides he will bring about albion’s time of great need— anything to bring back arthur from his watery grave.

(he was so tired of living, tired of waiting. he just wanted his friend back, wanted to smile and call the king a prat and be looked at with the same fond admiration he’d always been given though never recognized during the moment.)

…

…

…

(below the waters of avalon, between life and death, king arthur pendragon, the once and future king, awakens from death with a gasp.)

(above those same waters, shadows walk the earth. shadows of albion, and of camelot, knights and magical creatures alike. all of them simply echoes given life by a magic more powerful than anything that has ever been or will ever be.)

the thing is, the lake of avalon had never just been the specific location. it is the veil between worlds, and thus the lake of avalon is everywhere where life and death meet.

so, as the world decends to chaos, and as merlin watches the lake shore like the bird he is named after, king arthur is thrust from the lake of avalon somewhere else entirely, far out of merlin’s reach. behind him, the knights of the round table, along with the queen guinevere and the lady morgana, rise just the same.

because, of course, nothing is ever quite simple.

merlin does not extend himself to learn of the whys and hows of the pockets of resistance against him. he does not want to know, just wants them crushed because then, maybe then, albion’s need will be greatest.

so, when a certain floundering group of someones begin carving a path of resistance towards the shadow castle built only from the image carved into merlin’s own head, he does not take note except to send more power to squash it.

(said group does not know much, truly. they do not know of the world they have found themselves in, though they always find people willing to help them in the unlikeliest of places. they do not know what the name of the great evil they face is, nor why it had come, only that they must stop it.)

(they do not know why the lady of the lake was crying, as she watched them stumble into life once more, nor why she handed them a rose, just a rose, still on the stem, and told them that it would lead them to their destiny.)

(it is not until she has disappeared that arthur thinks to ask, where is merlin?)

[sugar-omi]

im reading an article about masahisa fukase, who took pictures of his wife every day she left the house. (the book is called "from window"), because i saw *this tweet and started reading replies which led to me reading the article where it explains she divorced him and how he went into a coma for 20 years, where she visited him twice every month.

and let me quote this part to you

He died in 2012, having been in a coma for 20 years following a near-fatal fall down the stairs of his favorite bar in 1992.

Yoko visited him twice a month throughout his long limbo - though, heartbreaking, he would have been unaware of her presence. "He remains part of my identity," she said, adding: "With a camera in front of his eye, he could see; not without."

it also says that he wished to control yoko, and also the world, by taking pictures. hoping to freeze time. and.. imagine this, specifically this quote and fukase's wish, with baxter.

baxter who is so helplessly in love with you. he loves you so much, that he takes every chance to capture your beauty.

he loves every picture of you.

but he's so obsessed with time. with mortality. with you.

he's missed out on so much during his younger years. pulling away from everyone who did love him, pulling away from those who reached out their hand to him.

mostly kept away from genuine, friendly people. they always knew how to pull him in, he was a sucker for kindness and genuineness. like you and your friends, or like qiu, tama, and ren.

tried to please his parents at times, mostly tried to rebel and irritate them. and succeeded, even when he wasn't trying.

so many years wasted.. hiding and running from life's simple pleasures. from friendship and companionship

that's why he keeps taking pictures of you, keeps trying to capture the world in a still state. because maybe. if it freezes for long enough. he can catch up...

but also, if you're always willing to be his muse. always a subject of his work.. then he still has control of himself. his life.

you're a constant. something that always happens without fail.

without fail, before you go to your destination, you're at the bottom of your window, posing for him. making a face. shouting at him.

even if you're upset at him.. you wait under the window while he takes that picture, a frown deep on your lips.

it's not much, but he still has something always in the palm of his hand. and that's you waiting at the bottom of the window.

but he loves you. God he loves you so much. some days you don't take pictures from through the window, he's too sick to get out of bed or he's gone ahead of you.

some days you're upset with him, or running late, and the only picture he takes is your frame running for the bus, the edges of your silhouette fuzzy and blurred.

but he still has pictures of you on your date the next night, and he has pictures of your bare form the night before yesterday.

but he's so busy looking through the camera... changing the setting, wiping his lense, and sorting his photos. that he doesn't notice when summer turns to winter. or winter into next spring. doesn't notice the new lines on your forehead or how your fingers sometimes shake when trying to open a jar

doesn't notice the gray in his hair. not the.. deep gray of his natural hair. but the light gray strikes that turn to ribbons of gray and white.

doesn't notice how dull his wedding ring is from years of wear and lack of polishing. doesn't notice how his favorite dress shoes have scratches and scuffs along the side and tip of the shoe

doesn't notice that his dinner is cold. doesn't notice that you don't hug him back when you go to sleep. doesn't notice your lipstick doesn't stain his cheek when he sleeps, or that your hoodie is too heavy and big on his shoulders.

only notices when the sunlight from the window hits your face perfectly, and he sees the age.

only when you don't smile or tease or shout at him from below the window like before.

only when you ate before him, telling him you couldn't wait for him to take pictures. when you stop talking to him so cheerily. when you stop looking at him with admiration and love, with awe whenever he holds the camera so expertly and insists on having you as his muse

he compares the photos from your youth and he sees happiness, he sees love, and life and he sees his whole world.

now, in some photos, he sees tiredness and aching, defiance. irritation. boredom, even...

your back is to the camera more than before. when you are facing it, your chin is tilted towars your book, or your eyes are closed, sleeping in your fluffy king bed. the light doesn't bounce off your ring like it used to.

the ones of you smiling, laughing at him from the other side, makes his heart thump and clench. he's racing.

but in others you look tired of the camera. your lips aren't frowned, but they aren't smiling either. and your eyes are heavy, not with lust or mischief or drowsiness. it's exhaustion, but it's the mental kind. it's the kind where you're at the end of your rope with this camera forever at the other end of your table

you don't see your husband

you see a camera. the damn camera that haunts you nightly and daily.

of course, there are ones where you smile. you're not entirely miserable.

but instead of seeing his beloved muse, his darling spouse. his hearts treasure.

he sees his treasure on display. in their pretty glass case in the middle of the showroom. he sees a ballerina trapped in her music box, forever spinning to the same tune.

he sees Mona Lisa looking at him through her frame, smiling and revered.

he tries to pull you from that painting. putting on his scuffed dress shoes and that same brown suit from your first date, he sets himself on the other end of you. not the camera.

he can't help but think of how the low lighting of the restaurant would suck to take pictures in right now. that he needs his setup, and he wonders if they'd be willing to let him bring all that to capture the moment here...

but you're twinkling. like you're afraid to sparkle but too enthused not to.

he swallows around the urge to capture time claws at his throat. it's beating down the door to his chest and he's trying to keep it from his aching heart.

he does try.

but when you run ahead to see the ducks on the lake, floating on top of the pearly lake, he can't help that his phone camera finds your form

it's not nearly as good as a real camera. it's pixelated and fuzzy. he has to step closer to get more details

but it's worth it, the way your face is bright and the way the wind blows is unusually perfect, shards of light slip through the cracks of thick leaves overhead

and when you turn your head, wanting him to see the family of ducks on the water, you don't mind the phone in his hand.

if you step into the frame for a moment, return to the stage of your music box, it's okay. because today was beautiful. it was so beautiful.

you sat in bed with him, the only thing between you two, the thin bedsheets and the breakfast tray. and the sand is still between your toes, and your feet are terribly dry from dipping into the sea.

baxter retracing the steps of your second meeting, plus a few extra stops to new establishments youve been waiting to enter, new mueseums and front row to your favorite theater show.

and his hand solid in yours, his eyes stuck on you like glue... so it's okay to let him pet your cheek and kiss you in the middle of this park.

because your heart is beating again with excitement, and you're thrilled with how much you had fun today.

and the next time, when he plans a sudden getaway trip for you two.

it's okay if he points the camera at you. because when you're bored, or teasing, or angry at him. you snatch it from his hands and now you're staring back at pictures of his porcelain face. with the filter on, you notice a new beauty mark under his eye easily, but you never needed it to know. but he did.

and you tuck the only picture he let you keep of his irritated face into your nightstand once you're home, you stick it under the one of him shielding his eyes from the sun and when you open thay drawer, the only thing you see is the top of his head and the birds in the sky.

there's thrills. there's always been moments of thrills. that's why youre in the frame, that's why you're his muse.

but when the day is dull. and most days are dull. some days, a couple more than you'll admit, you are tired of the camera.

some days, you want to smash that camera. smash the camera and bang your fists against his chest, slap his cheeks until he sees without the lenses.

but then he grabs the camera, and he parts your knee for you. tucks that hair behind your ear. folds the cuff of your jeans the way he wants. clasps his jewelry on your neck or wrist

and then you pick up the frame, and immortalize the moment, because even though your heart aches. and aches greatly. you love how he looks at you. how he captures your every move as if you haven't done it a hundred times before...

[huckleberrykai]

hueningkai ~ video games

pairing: gamer bf!hyuka x sanrio gf!reader summary: ... idk what this is tbh i haven't slept in 26 hours and i'm obsessed w this trope soz THANKS MOON I HAVE SEVERE BRAINROT - gamer bf kai headcanons bcs idk how to write something proper rn but i must get thoughts out !!! texts too?? idk i blacked out this is probably bad i'm going to sleep now LOL warnings: NSFW ! minors dni i will block u <3 all links go to Pinterest lol. very much not proofread at all click here for my masterlist!

gamer bf!kai who just loves how cute you are, sharing his love of plushies and video games you're a match made in heaven >///<

kai who buys you soooo many of those little sanrio pajamas, thinking you look so cute and sexy :( soft tummy on show for him to kiss and cuddle while he toys with the soft fabric, pulling your shorts to the side~~ keep it on.. please?

just buys you a new one when he ruins it with cum stains <3

kai who loves his lil sanrio gf so much :( so sweet but so secretly dirty. he buys you so many cute plushies of your favourite characters bcs he just loves u so much <3 loves it even more when he gets pictures and videos of you in the middle of the day, desperately humping the plushies he bought u, endlessly complaining they didn't feel as good as him >///<

he has to take breaks from playing with his gaming buddies to text you back, always ending up with him in your bedroom or on the phone with you, important game be damned.

he's down so bad. ur both simps. it's probably impossible to pull u apart once ur together tbh. kai who gets in trouble all the time for spending time at your house, having sleepovers bcs he's obsessed with your big comfy bed and adorably decorated room ~ finally having you all to himself as long as you don't count the plushies watching you get railed from the end of the bed bcs u forgot to turn them around >.<.

kai who likes to communicate with his fav girl through silly Sanrio memes, all your texts having so many djksalsk~

kai who gets bullied by his members whenever they see your texts over his shoulder~ stupid memes and tooth-rotting sweetness that make them pucker their faces in disgust jokingly, but really they're happy he found someone so sweet and well matched, even if you can't seem to keep your hands off each other.

gamer bf!kai who insists you should live together so you can have a shared gaming room. lets be real tho you'd barely end up sitting in your own chair, having a few minutes to yourself before kai plucks you away from playing the sims and plops you in his own lap. he needs his good luck charm, you wouldn't deprive him of a win would you?~

needy bf kai who can't keep quiet when you squirm around in his lap~ his friends blissfully unaware of his cute gf wiggling in his lap for attention. he'd played too many rounds and you were starting to get needy, and kai's so soft for you he can never say no :((

OMG OMG COCKWARMING trying to be quiet while kai tries to keep his hands steady on his controller and voice steady through the mic, gently pulling your matching pjs down and watching you slide down on him trying to get some much-needed relief. His voice was cracking, and when you started moving against him, dropping kisses against the pretty mole on his neck he had to quit, saying he was feeling sick or something. they def knew what was going on. it's happened before, it'll happen again 😭

and big sweet bf kai, manhandling you into bed and fucking you so well. He won't stop until you're seeing stars~ hands clutched around a hello kitty plush he'd given you with your hair sprawled out on the pillow. his sweet sanrio loving princess <3

nsfw taglist: @subbyjvnnie @mazeinthemoon @n0-thisispatrick @banggyu0308 @majestyjun @bibibinnie @beom-pyu

[polyklok]

Nathan Explosion full Alphabets

Pickles

Skwisgaar

Toki

Murderface

If you’re unaware, I did an headcanon request thing using these two alphabets

It got a bit more popular than I expected and my askbox got flooded. I loved doing it! But I ended up cramming a lot in a short amount of time, so I’m just gonna finish off the alphabets for every Dethklok member. It might take awhile. If you’re getting impatient waiting to see what I said about your favorite boy, you can look up the tag “Polyklok is real” to find all my posts including the previous headcanon requests.

Anywho-

Fluff

A for Affection-

Slightly more affectionate than you’d expect! Nathan isn’t one to show a lot of emotions or vulnerability at first. There's a good chance that you're just a fun piece of eye candy to him. He might have an arm around you when in public, but things like cuddling are reserved for after sex and after sex only.

As he starts to open up, he becomes more and more addicted to your soft touches and gentle holds. He leans into you whenever you are vaguely close to him, nuzzling his face into your neck and letting his hands settle on your hips or waist. Soon, it becomes mandatory for him to be attached to you whenever you're in the same room. Especially whilst cuddling, he is not letting go. Will carry you to the bathroom if needed, just to continue feeling your warmth.

B for Best friend-

It’s sort of stressful. Not because of Nathan specifically, but because it’s fucking Dethklok. You’re going to need to live a very private life when you’re associated with them, unless you want to be stalked and harassed daily by overly-obsessive fans. And that’s if you can even get any of them to engage with you in the first place, which is a task within itself.

IF you somehow manage to pull off the impossible, Nathan is a pretty silly dude. If he already likes you, it’s fairly easy to make him relax and laugh with you. Most of the time, the two of you will be drinking and making fun of dumb stuff until early in the morning. But he’s never gonna really open up to you. If you try to get into his personal life or mental health, he’s just gonna straight up cut you off permanently. You’re luckily you weren’t killed by Klokateers.

C for Cuddles-

Once he's settled into the relationship and comes to terms about his more unbrutal feelings for you, he quickly becomes comfortable with regular, sappy couples things like cuddling. Very comfortable.

You know those dogs who are big but think they are small? He's kinda like that. If you're lucky, he'll scoop you up first and hold you against him. If you're unlucky, he's too tired to think of such a gesture and will straight up collapse on you. While 'Death by Nathan Explosion' may seem good in theory, the truth is that you have to stick around for him, which means you can't come to peace with suffocating in his phat tits. I'm sorry. If he does lay on top of you, it's gonna have to be across your legs while you scratch his scalp; his favorite way to cuddle BTW.

D for Domestic-

Nathan is a little complicated.

On one hand, he grew up among perfect domesticity. A nice, middle-class suburban neighborhood with a hardworking Dad and a stay-at-home Mom who loved each other and him very much. He often helped his Mom with chores around the house, went fishing and hunting with his Dad, even spent time on the farm with his grandpa. Everyone was happy and life was simple. Even today, when Nathan pictures the 'perfect lifestyle', he imagines a friendly community and being a part of a couple as loving as his parents are.

But then again, he wasn't ‘happy’. He despised the white-picket fences, and gossipy neighbors, and (gag) public school. He spent his early life trying to get as far away from that as possible. He lives to buy stupidly expensive shit, destroy it in the most violent way possible, fill his nights with drugs and booze, tour around the world singing about death and destruction, be worshipped by hundreds of hot girls only to watch their faces fall as he returns to you, and then have you screaming in his bed before the sun rises. Nathan wants chaos.

Eventually, you'll find balance. He realizes he create his own version of the American dream, with you by his side as his perfect partner, his equal. He'll still be apart of Dethklok, still live in Mordhaus, still write the most disgustingly graphic songs you can think of. But he now lives day-to-day craving his morning kiss, setting aside time to have a lunch date with you, sharing a few beers rather than getting shitfaced. Nathan learns to settle down in a way that makes both sides of him happy.

E for Ending-

Aw man :/

If it’s early in the relationship, he just straight up ghosts you. He feels bad for doing it but he’s too much of a coward to do anything else. It’s probably because he realized he didn’t like you that much, you couldn’t keep up with his lifestyle, or he was simply being a horny bastard and pining after others. I love him, but he’s still a rich, sheltered douchebag.

If it’s later on…he has a really hard time coming to terms. It’s gonna have to be a mutual decision, otherwise your both gonna be stuck in a miserable relationship. Maybe he realizes that his lifestyle is unfit for long term relationships, maybe you realize that you don’t suit him as well as you used to. He’s gonna make his explanation, hear out yours, hug you goodbye, and even provide some money to help you get by. But he’s not gonna talk to you again. His heart is too tender for that.

Potentially, if you really did mean a lot to him and changed him in ways he’s now grateful for, he’ll write a brutal song for you with secretly sappy and thankful lyrics. Then you get the satisfaction of knowing that you left on the best possible terms.

F for Fiancé-

For a long time, Nathan didn’t think he ever wanted to get married. It’s just didn’t fit his image. The idea of Nathan Explosion ever being a part of a celebration for holy matrimony? No way.

But when you started to sneak your way into his heart, marriage suddenly seemed like a wonderful possibility rather than a stupid consequence of the world. He tried to fight against it, which only made the urge worse. A pair of sparkling rings, wedding bells, flowers, you in absolutely beautiful outfit- all kept haunting his mind until it felt like he was going mad. He seriously considered dropping to one knee every time you smiled or laughed.

One day, you’re randomly swooped off to Georgia, on the ranch which is parents moved after Florida went to shit due to his political pursuit (we don’t talk about that). It’s the first time you formally meet them both but they’re already so glad to meet you; Nathan has said a lot over the phone and they know you make him happy. One night, during the visit, Nathan goes outside with his father, just the two of them. He asks his Dad when he knew he wanted to marry his Mom. They have a long talk about commitment, patience, love and life. That’s when he makes up his mind.

He proposes a week later and only cries a little when you say yes.

G for Gentle-

Nathan is huge. I don’t care how tall or wide you are, he’s bigger. And as much as he loves the size difference, his brain doesn’t really register that fact fully. He’ll squeeze with realizing he’s crushing you, wrap himself around you until you overheat, and occasionally fully consume you in his cuddles, as I’ve said before. It’s rare that he actually hurts you, it’s more annoying than anything. Just mention it and he’ll let up immediately with a small “Sorry.”

It’s similar in the emotional department. He's very blunt and, while he means well, it can cause some hiccups in your communication. He's never malicious but he often forgets to filter himself or add cushioning to his words, which might caused some hurt feelings. If it's a heated moment, he'll straight up walk away to give himself some time to breathe, think, reevaluate, and then go apologize to you so a solution can be figured out.

H for Hugs-

For a while, you thought Nathan hated hugs. And he sort of did. He never initiated them. He saw a full-body, front-facing hug as a way to greet his parents and...not much else. He also thought having to ask for a hug was embarrassing. Early on, if he's feeling touchy, he'll settle for groping at or leaning into you.

But he came around very quickly as soon as you fully embraced him. Just 30 seconds of your arms completely wrapped around him has him addicted and now he initiates them whenever you have a few passing minutes of free time. Still doesn’t like asking for them, though, he just does it and it’ll sometimes scares you.

I for I Love You-

If you say it to him, he’ll do the whole “I mrgghmrhyou too” thing. It’s gonna be a while until he completes the sentence, he’s stubborn. He’s knows he loves you and he knows that you know that he loves you but the words just seem so big, too big for him to say out loud.

But they’re not too big for Drunk Nathan! You’re helping him into bed after he’s had a long night filled with booze, swatting away his wandering hands from your body. You tug away his boots and jeans so he’s not too uncomfortable while he sleeps. “Thanks babe,” He mutters, head buried in a pillow, “I love you. So fucking much.” You pause, surprised grin spreading across your face as he promptly rolls over and falls asleep.

With time, the words will come out more and more clearly until he’s giving the casual “Love you.” Every morning and night, not even thinking much of it. But you’ll always remember the first time he said it to you, even if he doesn’t.

J for Jealousy-

He thinks jealousy is such an ugly look. He’s had girlfriends like that, obsessed with him and surveilling every single thing he does. It was awful. And he doesn’t want to be like that, especially not to you! So he tries; he really tries to be cool and levelheaded and to trust you completely. And he does trust you!

But he does not trust a room full of douchebags who think it’s alright to try and talk up his S/O! His chest burns with anger every time a creep stares you down or blatantly flirts. In public, he’ll stand right behind you and watch the entire room over your shoulder with the deadliest glare on his face. He totally fails at trying to be subtle about it. He can’t stand the thought that other people are having the same thoughts that he does about you. If you call him out on his jealousy, he’ll grumble and look away with an embarrassed blush.

Once you get home from some sort of social event, one where too many eyes happened to be staring at your body, he attached to you. He’s groping at and leaning into you, trying to consume you in his touch just to remind you that you’re his.

K for Kisses-

His kissing? Pretty good. He’s a bit rough, but he’s definitely not a bad kisser, especially if you’re into getting rough. He likes to keep his hands busy on your body when he kisses you and he groans against your lips if you ever start to mess with his hair. Very good experience.

He can make you go dizzy with a deep kiss or leave you quivering from a make out session without even blinking. What drives him crazy are soft, quick, passing kisses that you plant on him. A peck on his lips, face, or anywhere else will leave him blushing like a madman. He has no idea how something so simple makes him so flustered but he enjoys the feeling of butterflies in his stomach, wants you to do it more and more! He never gets sick of your small kisses.

L for Little Ones-

In the small community in Florida he grew up in, everyone knew everyone, which meant that all his stuck-up, judgmental neighbors knew how weird he was. Even though his parents were always supportive of him, that didn't stop fucking Cathy from down the street riding his ass at every block party. To avoid all the stupid questions and potentially beating up old people, he settled to hang out with all the kids during social gatherings. They were fascinated by his huge figure, alternative style, and gravely voice. He'd often find himself wrestling off tons of giggling toddlers, all with a huge smile on his face from the playfulness. This was a long way to say he's great with kids.

Kid's bring out Nathan's silly side. He's willing to drop his ego and act a little dumb just to make sure they have a good time; He'll roughhouse or play pretend or take a conversation about fictional dinosaur characters very seriously. It's honestly so adorable to see. As for having children? The thought scares him, he could name millions of protentional disasters just from the concept. But, if it's a serious want of yours, he'll consider it.

M for Morning-

Nathan thrives off of routine. He wakes up around noon and will not start his day off until he gets a morning kiss from you. He will sit in bed and pout until you finally peck his lips with a “Good Morning”.

After that, it’s pretty simple. At some in the relationship, the two of you have grown accustomed to each other’s procedures and habits, so you do practically everything in-sync. Most of the time, while getting ready, there’s a pleasant conversation that Nathan has grown to look forward to. Sometimes it discussing the day’s plans, sometimes it’s swapping the dreams had last night, or sometimes it’s just you reprimanding him for leaving such obvious bruises on your neck. No matter what, he’s happy he gets at least some time with you in his very busy schedule.

Despite what you might think, Nathan prefers to snack over the day than to have a large breakfast/lunch. Whether you follow suit or not, there will be some point where the two of you part ways so get can get work done, usually a meeting or early band practice. But before you go off to do your own thing, he always takes a moment to look into you eyes and share a small “Love You.”

N for Night-

Nathan stays up late. He’s a total night owl, always has been. In some cases, he’ll be partying and drinking his weight in booze. But most nights, he just wants to get work done, usually writing lyrics. Either way, he insists you go to bed before him and he’ll join you later. If he has been partying extra hard, it’s up to you that he actually makes it to bed. That’s if he goes to bed at all; he definitely pulls a few all-nighters every now and then.

At around 12-3 AM, you’ll wake up to the bed shifting and groaning under his weight. He’s stripped down to his boxers, he smells of either beer or chips, and he’s shushing you to stay asleep. He doesn’t mean to wake you up almost every night, but it’s sort of inevitable. Either way, he’ll kiss your forehead and gladly accept it when you eventually come crawling into his side.

O for Open-

At the beginning, it is absolutely minimal. It’s almost sad how little he’s willing to open up to you. Anytime the two of you talk, his answers are gonna be almost complete one-worded. Every date you go on a date, it’s exclusively for press and/or so he can get his dick wet afterwards. He truly believes that you’re only interested in him for his fame. He’s not mad about it, but he’s accepted it as the truth, so he doesn’t bother putting in any effort to actually engage with you.

But, over time, his heart will soften up and he realizes that-holy shit-he actually likes you and wants to be genuine with you. It starts out slow, like actually telling you about his day rather than just saying “Fine” or asking you questions about the side of your life that doesn’t revolve around him. He grows into admitting he cares about you or letting you in on band-business that’s supposed to be private. You can tell he fully trusts you when he’s willing to break down, let you comfort him while he cries, confess his weaknesses and allow you hear them because he knows that you won’t leave him for them. Then, and only then, does he realize how much he values you.

P for Patience-

It’s no secret that Nathan is a bit of a brat, or at the very least, a diva. It’s nowhere to the extent of his other bandmates (cough cough Skwisgaar) but he can certainly be picky or, yes, impatient at times. When it comes to small, inconvenient things, his anger is quick to spark up. It’s more so frustration than anything else, but he is still very clearly pissed off when something isn’t going how he wanted it to.

With you? He tries so hard to be levelheaded and cool. He’s willing to talk about it and work out solutions. But he has a tendency to just simmer in his own exasperation, especially when it’s something that has to just be dealt with rather than solved. A lot of the time, if he finds himself growing with anger, he will straight up walk away. It may seem disrespectful to you, but he’s just trying to keep himself from yelling or saying something stupid. He cannot lose you to an argument like that. Once he’s cooled down, he’ll return, apologize, and reaffirms that you’re okay with whatever is going on. Nathan really does want what’s best for you, no matter how angry he’s feeling in the moment.

Q for Quizzes-

Nathan wants to remember everything! He tries so hard to keep track of every little thing you say or do just because you’re so precious to him! But, more often than not, his brain will betray him and he’ll draw a blank when trying to decipher things about you. It’s not just you, he doesn’t have the most reliable memory in general. But he feels like such a bad boyfriend for not knowing things that should be obvious, like your birthday or favorite food.

At some point, he starts writing things down in his notebook. The very same notebook that holds reminders, inspiration, and lyrics for Dethklok songs. Every time you make a small comment that might be useful to him later, he quickly jots it down. It’s a little funny, right next to song titles like “Burn The Earth” and “Guts Punch Balls Throw-Up” he has little notes like “Favorite Flavor is strawberry :)”

BTW, you’re never allowed to see the notebook because you might also see notes such as “Looked super pretty this Sunday, made me happy” and how embarrassing would that be?

R for Remember-

It was such a quiet day. Nothing particularly exciting was happening, nothing particularly awful, either. He had spent hours sorting through paperwork, his brain still hurting with legal terms and signatures. Now, it was late afternoon, and the two of you were spending time on the couch.

By “spending time”, I mean he was writing lyrics, you were reading a book, and a large plate of French fries sat in the middle. Everything was so still. Occasionally you’d flip the page and grab a fry or he’d grumble and scribble something down. But besides that, perfect tranquility.

Until you decided you needed a drink. You left the room for a second, only a second, to grab a water or soda or beer. You just…got up and left. Like a normal person. But immediately, as soon as you were out of his presence, Nathan felt unnerved. The entire balance of the room shifted without you on a couch cushion beside him. He stared, dumbfounded, at the doorway as though you had abandoned him. He just missed you so much.

Less than three minutes later, you were back, with a drink in either hand. You place one by him, kissed his cheek in a way that made his heart flutter, and returned to your spot as though nothing had happened. Technically, nothing had happened, but those less-than-three-minutes had struck Nathan as so wrong, that when you returned, he was so, so internally grateful to have you there with him.

It was in that moment that Nathan realized how much he loved you, how important you were to him, how he couldn’t stand to be without you for a second. Even if the evening continued without him saying a word.

S for Security-

Yes, very much so.

Nathan fully believes that you’re “brutal as hell” and fully capable with handling whatever life throws at you. It’s one of the reasons he loves you! But he still acts so protective of you, he thinks that’s how a ‘good boyfriend’ should act (raised on traditional values and all). It’s adorable, how he insists on being your guard dog in public or carrying stuff you could’ve gotten yourself. It’s his own form of chivalry.

However, in a situation where your life is genuinely at stake, he freaks the fuck out. Adrenalin kicks in, he hyper-focuses on getting you out of there, even over his own safety. Remember when he saved Toki whilst Mordhaus was burning down? He’s not even blinking until he knows your secure, preferably in his arms. Afterwards, he’s pressed into you, rocking back and forth, sobbing that he could’ve lost you. He never wants to feel that way again.

If you were to protect him, potentially from rapid fans, he…Well, Nathan finds it hot. I’ll get more info this later, but Nathan thinks aggression is a very good look on you. He obviously wants to keep you out of harm’s way, but he might just let you yell for a little bit just to enjoy the image.

T for Try-

Early in the relationship, he goes all-out with expensive gifts, extravagant dates, and big gestures. Unfortunately, it’s not necessarily because he’s trying super hard, but he thinks it’s what will keep you happy. Again, in his mind, you’re only dating Nathan Explosion for the clout and/or money, so he’s gonna give it to you.

Eventually, he learns to be more personal with you. At that point, he tries so damn hard, not at making his romantic pursuits as bold, but more so at making them perfect for you. All your dates are planned so that you have the best time you could possibly have. The gifts become symbolic and personalized in a way only the two of you understand. His gestures become slightly more private, pleasing you rather than impressing those around you. He’s slightly embarrassed at his own sappiness but seeing the glow in your eyes is so worth it.

Day to day is about the same. Nathan has put in a lot of effort making sure that the two of you have a shared schedule that works and he’s super proud of it, having the comfort of you every single day.

U for Ugly-

As I said earlier, the first ‘phase’ of your relationship with Nathan is going to be difficult. He doesn’t trust you, he’s completely unwilling to share any details he deems “personal” which is most of them, and he really only dates you to say he’s dating someone and to show you off to the paparazzi. It’s…pretty pathetic. You’re gonna need to be tough in order to fight your way through to Nathan’s heart.

Even then, he has a streak of untrustworthiness. Not necessarily from you, but his jealously and clinginess can be a bit overwhelming sometimes. Not as bad as some other members though…

He’s incredibly stubborn. We’ve seen how picky he is with Dethklok’s music and that bleeds into other aspects of his life. He doesn’t enjoy sudden changes to his routine or unexpected events. He tries to be open-minded, but arguments might spark up if he’s feeling particularly hard-headed that day. Although, you are the only person he truly trusts an opinion from.

V for Vanity-

Most of the time, Nathan doesn’t really care. He likes to keep his appearance at least a bit brutal at all times, for sake of his image. His clothing is never too expensive or of high-quality. If he finds something that he likes, he buys multiples of it so he can wear it again. I’m also convinced that he dyes his hair because there’s no way it’s that black (look at his parents!). Outside of that, he’s not too concerned with how he looks.

Until he is. Every now and then, Nathan will get depressive mood for a bit and really start hating in his own appearance. He’s not in his peak physical form anymore; he’s fat and aging in a way that’s not super graceful. Online criticism of his every feature doesn’t help either. Which is why he really appreciates it when you start to love up on him, kissing random places and telling him how much you adore his body. He’ll mumble and look away and try to push you off a little bit, but his cheeks are heating up and his brain is tingling with all sorts of good feelings. Nathan loves being doted on.

W for Whole-

Like I said, Nathan likes routine. When you’re suddenly pulled out of the equation, his whole day is set off and he gets all moody until you come back. He doesn’t need to constantly be with you but he once he’s assimilated to your presence, he doesn’t ever want you to leave. At some point, deep in the relationship, you become an aspect of life to Nathan and he can’t even imagine trying to live without you.

So yes, in a sense, he’d be incomplete without you.

X for Xtra-

Even when he realizes that his relationship with you means much more than he originally realized, he still loves showing you off to cameras or at parties. With his arm around you, both wearing gorgeous outfits, he loves to show the entire world just how beautiful his S/O is and wants the world all to sob about it!

Before, pictures with his girlfriends used to be stiff and awkward. He just stood there, holding her hand maybe, whilst she posed for the camera. Now, he’s completely different. He’s wrapped around you, nuzzling into you, even smiling! The media goes crazy when he first does this with you; this is a side of him never shown to the public. It’s passionate, it’s tender, it’s so off-brand for Nathan Explosion! But he doesn’t care. He seriously gets off on the fact that you’re the only one that can make him feel this way and the only one he’ll act this way for.

Y for Yuck-

Lying. Nathan is already so guarded, so knowing that you are lying-for whatever reason- to him just cuts so deep and forgiving you will be a piece of work, if he decides to at all. Even if it’s something unpleasant, he just wishes you would talk to him and the two of you could work it out together.

After the whole “Rebecca’ incident, he can’t stand an S/O that’s too pushy or controlling of him. Who would’ve guessed, manipulating and bullying someone you’re supposed to be in a relationship with is not okay?! If you start off like this, he’s backing out immediately and probably calling you a bitch in the process. If you become worse over the course of the relationship, he might already be too far in love to realize how awful you’re being, so it’s usually his band members who are going to be calling you out on your bullshit. And there’s only a 50% chance you make it out of that alive soooooooooo….

Z for Zzz-

Nathan becomes a fucking wall when he sleeps. He’s on his back, he’s perfectly still, he’s gently snoring, and nuclear bomb couldn’t wake him up; you couldn’t even push him over you you tried. He likes to have you tucked under his arm when he gets into bed, but after he’s asleep, you could sleep directly on top of him for all he cares, he still won’t wake up. Probably would be super easy to suffocate.

Every now and then, you’ll wake up to him yelling his lungs out. Nathan is regularly frequented by prophecies nightmares and his reaction to them is not to thrash around or scream, but to just do the loudest, longest metal-growl you’ve ever heard. It’s terrifying to wake up to. Over time you’ll get used to it and begin to comfort him, usually by petting his hair and shushing him. He’s still half-asleep, so it’s not long before his eyes flutter shut once again. It becomes routine at one point.

Alright! And that’s fluff. Below there will be SMUT, including references to kink and BDSM. If you’re are sensitive to things that don’t qualify under “vanilla” sex, then this not for you babe.

A for Aftercare-

You are going to need it, babe. Nathan is prone to absolutely destroying you in the bedroom. Afterwards, though, he’s quite sweet (even if he won’t admit it). He likes to cuddle, soothing your aches and pains, kissing and fondling you gently. He’s vulnerable in this moments, exhausted from plowing you and soaking in his sentimental feelings for you. He keeps speaking to a minimum, sorry if you are into pillow talk. But he much rather care for you with actions rather than words.

If he’s feeling particularly romantic, he’ll get some Klokateers to start up a bath, completed with bubbles and scented oils. He knows it’s cheesy, but he really does have a soft spot for things like that, plus he gets an excuse to hold your naked body even longer.

B for Body Part-

He’s obsessed with you chest, no matter your gender or size. Groping with his large hands, running his fingers over your nipples to watch them perk up, leaving hickies all over. If you have boobs (or just large pecs) he loves watching them bounce while you fuck, his eyes are glued. If not, he still toys with your nipples, grinning as you whimper from the sensation. Nathan just loves your chest.

On himself; he has some lingering body issues, so he really doesn’t think to much about what he’s got going on during sex. That being said…he’s pretty proud of his dick. I’ll talk about it more during letter X but, oh lord, his cock is impressive. Nathan got some blessed genes in that department.

C for Cum-

Nathan comes in long, thick streams. He makes these beautiful grunting noises, hips thrusting forward and fists clenching onto whatever they can grab like your throat. He might just mutter some words about how filthy you are or how you drive him absolutely crazy as his cock twitches out his orgasm. As you might’ve guess, his favorite place to cum is on your chest, with you looking up at him like the god he is. Bonus points if you lick it up, he’ll get hard all over again.

D for Dirty Secret-

Obviously, like any good boyfriend, Nathan doesn’t like seeing you upset! He wants you to be happy, he wants life to be easy and good! But, whether directed at him or someone else, Nathan can’t help getting way too fucking horny when he sees you seething with anger!

When you’re voice starts getting a bit louder than necessary, you roll your eyes and furrow your brows, you throw your hands around with frustration…he is struggling to hide his boner. Something about it just makes you seem powerful and sexy to him and he feels so bad for not taking you seriously in the moment but he’s already flooded with dirty thoughts.

He would probably rather die than admit this to you, but there’s a good chance you figure it out on your own terms. If so, he will be very on board when you act just a little mean in the bedroom; pulling his hair and bossing him around, maybe even scolding him for being so turned on by your anger. Despite your love for each other, you can least pretend to be having awesome hate sex.

E for Experience-

It’s nothing to sneeze at. I imagine Nathan lost his virginity at some point in high school before he dropped out and it only went up from there. I mean…he’s a massive celebrity. He pretty much has access to all the sex he could ever want. The tricky part is catering to your needs. Before, Nathan was a bit of a selfish lover. Not awful but not super mindful about what the groupies he was banging were into. Once he’s dedicated himself to you, he realizes that really good sex requires communication. With some time and a few slightly awkward conversations, he’ll have mastered everything you could ever desire from him and it is worth it for the both of you. Nathan Explosion can fuck.

F for Favorite Position-

Including visuals from google

“Pirate’s Bounty”

I’ll start by saying that Nathan isn’t super picky. He’s obviously not very flexible, so anything that requires some impressive stretches from him is off the table. Outside of that, he’s game. You could be face down, on top, spread out, etc. He’s happy as long as his dick is buried in you, honestly.

That being said, this is a comfortable favorite he often resorts to. It lets him see all his favorite parts of you, grab and grope whatever his hands can reach, and look you in the eyes while he degrades the hell out of you. Nathan plows away, groaning about what a slut you are as one hand holds your leg against his torso and the other squeezes your throat. There’s also a good chance you’ll have your hands tied up to the headboard while he goes at it…Ugh I’m a simp

G for Goofy-

Absolutely not.

When he’s in the zone, Nathan pretty much loses all of his humor. Sex is very serious to him, in the same way alcohol is I think, “It’s sacred.” And once he’s with you, there’s an added layer of intimacy. So, no, Nathan isn’t really going to be cracking any jokes or even acknowledging the funny circumstances that inevitably happen. He’s too caught up in, well, destroying you.

If you happen to make a joke… yikes. He is very unimpressed. He’ll probably just ignore it. If you persist, Nathan will either make you cum so hard you forget your name, let alone a joke to make. Or, he’s gonna torture the fuck out of you until your apologize and beg for his mercy. It’s a good time either way. But don’t do it again, he really will get annoyed with you.

H for Hair-

He has a deep, deep secret that he has been carrying with him ever since he started getting an allowance as a kid. He has gone through ridiculous measures to ensure that this is not exposed to the public. Nathan Explosion…Dyes his hair. Oh, the horror! Seriously though, he has routinely dyed his roots black twice and month since he was, like, 10. Naturally, mousy brown color, similar to his Mom’s.

And as soon as he started actively messing around, Nathan even dyed his pubes as well. He doesn’t shave himself completely bare, usually just trims it down to stay out of the way. I’ve heard that balls can be difficult to shave and he doesn’t strike me as the type of guy to bother. And, yes, dyed it the same black as his hair, just so groupies wouldn’t go and spread the word. Eventually, with you, he stops caring so much about downstairs and lets it grow into its natural color. It’s honestly sort of cute and he gets a bit flustered when you point it out.

I for Intimacy-

Nathan really thought that romantic, passionate sex was only for basic dildo jack-offs and that he would never, ever be so vulnerable with someone. Nathan was an idiot. Once you are in the picture, he suddenly craves to fuck you in a way that is so beautiful and emotional. He wants more than just brutality and he’s not really sure how to handle it in a way that won’t make him seem too soft (he is so, so soft for you).

After some internet research and building up his courage, Nathan takes you out on a date. And it’s perfect. Dinner and a walk and stargazing, just the two of you. Part of him feels stupid, silly for indulging in something so cliche. But that part dies completely when he sees how enchanted you are by his efforts. Its a milestone in your relationship, because the whole night is filled with him getting sentimental with you, completely focused on the time you’re spending together. He’s overwhelmed with all the love he feels for you and, for maybe the first time in his relationships, he’s completely sure that you feel the same for him. It’s a wonderful realization.

When you finally get home, you’re met with rose petals and candles and music. Nathan is slow, squeezing your body like he’ll never let go, drinking in your image and your touch, telling you how perfect you are the entire time. It’s even better when you reciprocate it all back, caught up in each other, tangled within all sorts of amazing sensations. He even starts getting teary-eyed when he finally fills you up. He loves you so much.

After that night, the two of you still have sex that is rough and/or casual fairly often. But he always makes sure to set aside time every now and then to truly make love to you. When he chooses to be, Nathan can be extremely intimate and romantic with you.

J for Jack Off-

Nathan masturbates fairly often, even when you’re available for sex. Not that he’s not interested in you, he’s just rubbing one out so he can pursue more important things at the moment and blow off some steam, thought he won’t reject a blowjob.

Most likely he’ll be stumped with a particular song or going through some writer’s block same lmao. He’s frustrated, wracking his brain for rhymes that just don’t seem to exist, let alone fit the song he’s writing. He can’t tell if he can’t focus because he’s hard or hard because he can’t focus. Either way, his pants are straining and it’s getting difficult to ignore. A while ago, he might’ve pulled up some porn or even one of his old magazines, but he’s now think of you as he undoes his belt.

How gorgeous you looked for him a few nights ago, tears falling down your cheeks and legs shivering as he ruthlessly fucked you into, abusing your body in the most pleasurable way possible. He groans, tugging at his cock, eyes closed and wishing you were there with him now. Nothing made him cum harder that your touch.

When he’s finished, he makes a quick job of cleaning up and pulls back into his pants like nothing happened, feeling a new sense of lightness on his shoulders. Until he makes the unfortunate realization that he has to go back to working.

K for Kink-

Nathan is very, very kinky. He’s a huge fan of all things BDSM and Dom/Sub dynamics.

Knife and blood play, bondage, wax play, hair pulling, gagging, choking, edging, overstimulation, impact play, degradation, and even consensual non-con (which delves into roleplay as well).

He doesn’t even mind to be on the receiving end either, although he’s much more used to being in control. Hope you’re ready for that.

L for Location-

His bedroom. Yeah, he’s boring. Not even necessarily on the bed, but Nathan enjoys a secluded space for the two of you. If it’s at a point where you haven’t moved in, then your bedroom also works I guess.

But that’s lame so, scenario #2-

Nathan would love to fuck you as close to the ocean as possible. On the beach, on a boat, I would say a submarine but those are kinda controversial rn. He feels a deep connection to the ocean, although he can’t fully understand why. So having you there feels far more vulnerable to him than it should and he likes the intensity of it, even if you can’t feel it.

M for Motivation-

As I said earlier, seeing you get mad really does it for him. That’s what gets him the most riled up, even if he’s a tad ashamed of it.

He also loves massages. Nathan is a big dude who is constantly head banging and doesn’t have the best posture. He fucking melts when you rub his neck and shoulders and gets really excited to pay you back with some slow, hard fucking. The relief of you easing out his muscles just has him addicted.

Any revealing clothes, but particularly a low-cut shirt, especially if you happen to bend over and give him the perfect view; Nathan is drooling.

N for NO-

This goes with his ‘honesty’ thing, but Nathan hates when you fake it. He can tell instantly when you’re moans are being exaggerated, when you’re not really into something he’s doing, or if you try to fake an orgasm and it pisses him off. In your early relationship, he might begrudgingly ignore it just to get it over with. But later on, he finds it inexcusable and practically begs you to just tell him when you don’t like something. He’s a quick learner too, he’ll improve his technique and have you screaming in no time!

O for Oral-

Going DownKlok changed the history of everything forever in time.

For a while, there were very few things in this world that Nathan loved more than a blowjob from you. If you offered to suck him off, Nathan’s pants were already to his knees. No matter when or where, he’d find a way to get head. This led to a lot of risky bathroom escapes and leaving parties early. Nathan just loves a good ol’ blowey; petting your hair, looking down at you with a gaze full of lust, grumbling in pleasure as you choke.

However…I think we’re all aware of Nathan’s infamous refusal to use his own mouth on you. He somehow made himself think that doing so made him weak or submissive, probably something he heard in high school that stuck. He’ll straight up say, “Nope” when you ask and refuse to elaborate.

That is until one night, he’s stripping you’re clothing off and laying you down on his bed, giving you feverish and sloppy kisses. Your legs are wrapped around him, your face is red, and something about how gorgeous you look under him just makes him go, ‘Fuck it.’ and he dives in. Minimal thoughts, pure desperation.

And Nathan fucking loves it. He loves gripping your thighs and teasing you with his tongue and groaning against you whenever you moan his name. He’s a master at it too, knows all the perfect moves. It became a regular occurrence very quickly. Whenever you go down on him, he reciprocates. Or will just get on his knees for you at random moments purely because he loves to. Nathan’s new favorite thing is to give oral.

P for Pace-

It really depends on his mood. He can be both rough and romantic, often both at the same time. Sometimes he’ll be pounding so hard into you that your vision goes blurry; other times he will gently caress your body as he eases in and out. There’s really no definitive pace he goes for, though he is on the aggressive side more often than not in the bedroom. If he’s going to fast (or slow) for you, Nathan has no problem adjusting accordingly.

Q for Quickie-

He’s actually not a huge fan of them. He likes the concept of them, quickly and discreetly fucking each other, putting off other things just for sex. But in practice, not so much.

Rather than just enjoying it, Nathan will get stressed about his time management or wonder if something is going wrong without him there. He thrives on routine and prefers to take his time with you, so quickies just throw off his whole vibe. If anything, he’ll give you some oral and be on his way, saving the real thing for later. Even better, he’ll talk you up, telling you all the things he’s gonna do before leaving you to crave him.

R for Risk-

Nathan is very open to experimentation and is willing to try anything at least once. If he doesn’t like it, though, he’ll shut it down pretty quickly. But you don’t ever have to worry about sex being too vanilla or boring for you, Nathan is quite the adventurous type in the bedroom.

If he’s caught doing something freaky in a semi-public area with you, like a rented-out movie theatre or random bedroom during a party, he fucking dares it to be released to the press. Charles will do everything in his power to keep that from happening, for image’s sake, but Nathan is the biggest rockstar in the world. As I said earlier, he likes to show you off, and this is an extension of that. Now everyone knows how hard he fucks the gorgeous person he constantly has under his arm, what’s so embarrassing about that?

The potential risk for a pregnancy is…well, very touchy. You’d have to have a long conversation beforehand. If you don’t take precautionary measures, he will.

S for Stamina-

Nathan is a pretty big dude, and as strong as he is, not in the best physical health I must say. He has no issue getting it up again a couple more times, but with how hard he often goes, Nathan needs to take some good, long breathers. If you do plan on going at it for a while, these breaks will be full of gentle touches and praise for how well you’re doing, before he goes right back into you calling you a slut for wanting his cock so much. Ugh. If the two of you are careful, he can actually last a very long time, but there are a few certain little things you do that drive him crazy and will speed up his orgasm.

T for Toy-

A reasonable amount. Bondage equipment, whips and paddles, a few ornate knives to cause just the right amount of damage. Probably a vibrator that he tortures you with (male or female cmon now). He’s into kinky shit and kinky shit requires materials a lot of the time. I could also imagine him being really into that sex-furniture stuff, just to make things more convenient. If you ever have something you wanna try out, just ask and he’ll get it in a heartbeat. The only thing I can see him being adverse to is a dildo; you have his dick, why would you need another? Until you explain all the extra fun that can be had with it, then Nathan is on board.

U for Unfair-

Obviously with his dynamics and kinks, teasing goes along with that. He never edges you for too long, just long enough to make your eyes water and have you begging him for a desperate release. Really though, he doesn’t have nearly enough patience to edge you for hours, or hell, days but Nathan likes having a sense of control, so he still holds back when he’s feeling particularly malicious. He’ll tease you just long enough to get you to beg and then give in to you with overstimulation that’s almost worse than the teasing.

In public, he might give you some subtle pinches and gripes, hovering around you when he’s feeling frisky, but it’s nothing too blatant. If he’s desperate enough, he’ll drag you off to a slightly more private area.

V for Volume-

Nathan has a deep, gravely, sexy voice. It’d be a crime if he was silent during sex. Luckily, you get plenty of delicious growls, grunts, and groans from him. The pure bass of his voice shakes your entire skeleton when he’s real close to your ear. He does a whole lot of dirty talking too, using that same voice, degrading you to all hell while your mind in a blur of pleasure and pain. If he happens to be on the receiving end, you might be able to elicit some breathy, whimpery swears from him. While he���s not super loud volume-wise, all his noises are fucking perfect.

W for Wild Card-

My name ain’t Polyklok for no reason ffs

Pickles was totally the one to introduce him to the world of kink. He always knew he was a bit rougher than most and had some freaky fantasies, but when he and Pickles frequently messed around in the early days of Dethklok, he learned just how deep his desire for pain went.

Pickles had him tied up, hit, cut, and edged for what felt like forever. It was torture and yet Nathan always craved more of it. He felt so exposed and so safe at the same time. His exposure to BDSM was with him on the receiving end and it was perfect for him to discover just how wonderful that connection through pain was, especially with someone he trusted like Pickles.

He always has it in the back of his mind whenever he’s going at it with you, making sure that you’re feeling all the same wonderful things he felt and assuring that you are just as safe as he was. Tormenting your body is really a love language to him.

X for XRay-

Oh sweet baby satan

Nathan is hung. 8.5 Inches when fully erect and hella girthy, a slightly narrow head for your sake. The thing still somehow manages to bend upwards when he’s hard, by some miracle. He’s circumcised (look at his parents I mean-) and considerably veiny. Could’ve honestly been a porn star if the whole death metal thing didn’t work out.

Y for Yearning-

His sex drive his very high early in the relationship and eases into something more manageable within a few months. But overall, yeah, he’s quite set and you’ll certainly never feel neglected.

Depending on the damage; he might accidentally leave you untouchable for half a month due to the pure soreness. And he’ll be very apologetic. But usually, assuming injuries are kept under a certain threshold, he’ll go at it 2-4 times a week.

But his yearning can also build up. If you don’t happen to join him in travels for touring season, you’re gonna get it when he finally gets back. Both of you are gonna be completely unavailable for a few days minimum.

Z for Zzz-

Not too soon. This was pretty much all elaborated on in ‘A’, but he still cleans up and cuddles and gives you plenty of good aftercare. Once that’s all done and he’s confirmed that you feel taken care of…Nathan will sleep. If it happens to be way late at night/early in the morning, he might tough it out just to get his day started, but he’s gonna start feeling like crap by noon and probably pass out soon after that. Man needs his sleep.

…

I need my sleep. Dude, this took almost two months and many all-nighters. And I have so many requests…I love writing and I love the silly metal boys but…boy howdy. Thanks for reading, gorgeous.