#for the record. to make myself Exceptionally clear.

[salemruinseverything]

oh great it's reached far enough outside the mutual circle that people are mad at me about this post now!

truly disappointing that one of the greatest works of modern literature is a dream smp chatfic

[raayllum]

Why is Clauderry together / why is Terry with Claudia?

This is a question I've seen posed more than a few times in the fandom, of people feeling confused with why Claudia is with Terry (despite her dislike of elves) and more so why Terry is with Claudia despite her being a walking collection of red flags. This has, admittedly, always questions I felt the show answered quite well and obviously, but if it's still being probed, then... why not?

Let's talk about it.

Why is Claudia with Terry?

The only prior examples we have with Claudia having any kind of romantic connection is with Callum, which never came to fruition; I've also gone on record saying myself that the show made it clear Callum's feelings for Claudia were a lot stronger than whatever, if any, she held for him. However, in her interactions with Callum even just as a friend, we can see what she appreciates in her free time. For starters, we see that Claudia enjoys being a goofball:

We see that a shared sense of humour is something that Claudia cares about, as one of the only compliments she gives to Callum is "You always make me laugh" and "That was very confident Callum" as he was able to go with the flow while asserting himself.

Words of affirmation is also something she clearly enjoys. Appreciation, acknowledgement, and gratitude are very important to her.

(Side note: This is also part of why she spirals into "I did all THIS FOR YOU" on the beach in a "You owe me your life" kind of way, because she was prepared and sacrificed and saved you, and doesn't that deserve acknowledgement? Doesn't that mean getting what she wants? What she's owed? But I digress.)

We also see early fracturing in Callum not trusting her (1x03, 2x03), a subsequent breakdown in honest communication on both sides, and that Claudia reads Callum as being judgemental of her dark magic use, which is also something that frustrates her about Soren:

(Part of this is because Claudia has gone from seeing dark magic as just an amazing beautiful tool to a terrible but necessary one, so necessary that it overrules any other reservations... because she's attached to seeing herself as a Good Person—"But I'm not evil, it's me"—but again, I digress.)

Conversely, Terry has all of those things in spades. He admires and relies upon her dark magic use, he's someone she can be reciprocally goofy with, he's extremely attentive and loyal (and loyalty/devotion is something that is also extremely important to her), and perhaps most importantly, he's helpful and non-judgemental.

Terry also explains that one of the things Claudia likes about him is his smarts / creative thinking ("Goofy and glorious, just like you" / "You saved the day Ter-Bear") and his thoughtfulness:

Claudia says I think too much about everything, and that makes me weird, and wonderful, so...

This makes sense as Claudia values being prepared in her own day-to-day life curtesy of being a dark mage, and that Soren's tendency to being impatient when they were growing up together (lying about Harrow without consulting her, picking the fight with the dragon, etc) was something that got on her nerves.

As for the Elf 'elephant' in the room... Claudia also doesn't have an issue trusting Aaravos for one simple reason: he's helping her save her dad.

Even while she's warning Soren against trusting or forming friendships with other elves and dragons because they might "take advantage" of him and be fake friends, she can't see that's precisely what Aaravos is doing to her. In a similar vein, Terry also believes in her (as he says directly in 4x09) and is helping her save her father, so why would she have a problem with him even if he's an elf?

That doesn't mean there aren't problems in Claudia's worldview, or that exceptionalizing people is a Good thing to do, particularly to your partner, but it's a clearly defined and realistic cognitive dissonance. Claudia has moved past seeing all elves as Bad™ to "these ones are good" because they're helping her, and not getting in her way, and that's all she really personally cares about.

However, I think most people can understand why Claudia's with Terry, given how sweet and routinely supportive she is. The bigger thornier question then is the opposite. So let's talk about that too.

Why is Terry with Claudia?

One of the most common things people say when it comes to Terry and Claudia is that they wish we could see how they met (and presumably whether that initial attraction was there from the start or how it developed). This usually leans into an underpinning idea (and I could be wrong) that seeing their beginning would help indicate why Terry fell for her (and thereby why he stays). And I would definitely be interested in how they met, and am open to seeing it, whether in a show, graphic novel, or novelization mention.

That said, I think the show has also answered these accordingly. In a lot of ways, there's really only two reasons why Terry is with Claudia as she is in arc 2:

1) He doesn't have an Issue with dark magic.

He admires Claudia's use of it ("And your daughter's amazing, she brought you back from the dead, wow!"), is open and receptive to using it ("Dark magic has a tingly aftertaste, nobody ever tells you that"), and doesn't see anything fundamentally wrong with it ("Should I give up dark magic? Terry, tell me what to do" "Claudia, I can't"). On the one hand, this makes sense; there are spell ingredients of dark magic that aren't that different from hunting and given that Terry grew up near the Drakeriders, I'd find it hard to believe if the Drake riders don't hunt and eat meat, so even if Terry's village didn't, he was at least somewhat close to societies that did.

That doesn't mean he has zero reservations about dark magic ("I've seen you do some awful things, dark magic things" / "Are you mixing the pentapus ink with your own blood?") but that to him, it's not any different from how Claudia thinks about it. She also thinks she's done terrible things in the name of saving her father:

But I'm not evil. It's me. You know me.

I had to do things... [starts crying] I never imagined I would be able to do. (4x01)

This is also how Terry copes with murdering Ibis, citing "I had to, I couldn't let him hurt you," "and he was going to take Claudia's life, I had no choice," and "I'm going to be strong enough to do whatever I need to do and still have feelings." To Terry what matters most is exactly what he says in 4x09: why are you doing these things? Are they actually necessary?

Terry loves Claudia (and Viren by extension) above anything else. Everything he does is for them, good or bad. That devotional loyalty is something that Claudia also lives by, and is arguably her and Terry's biggest shared life value.

Doing terrible things is okay if it's in the name of love, and if it's not, then you shouldn't do them. This is why when he talks about his grief/guilt with Ibis, Terry always scaffolds it alongside the reason why he did it.

This is also why Terry steps in exclusively when what Claudia is doing is unnecessary. She didn't need to trick Rayla in order to get away. She doesn't need to kill the dragon ("It won't follow us anymore, it's trapped") as it's already helpless. They're actions without good reasons, which is also why Terry distrusts Aaravos, because he realizes:

Maybe this story started out as a story of love, but along the way it got twisted. [...] He isn't doing anything for love. He's doing it out of revenge.

So long as Claudia is doing things out of love, Terry will stick by her. And if she stops doing it out of love, then she stops being the Claudia he knows.

Which, I'll also note, is fundamentally different from the Claudia that everyone else knows, because

2) He didn't know Claudia beforehand.

Terry doesn't know Claudia as a semi sheltered girl growing up in the palace who did dark magic solely for fun, nor how most of her close personal relationships (Soren, Callum, Ezran) got destroyed in the span of 3ish weeks. He only knows Claudia who uses dark magic (seemingly) 90% out of complete necessity for flight, safety, and bringing her father back. He seemingly doesn't really know how Soren and Claudia had their falling out, nor does he have any real clue who Callum or Ezran are.

Because Claudia was his only way to know these things rather than knowing multiple people involved, or even living through experiences, Terry would've gotten sparse details or the version that is how Claudia experienced them, and he has no reason to doubt her.

To be clear, I'm not saying that their set up is perfect or that their relationships is perfectly healthy. It's not. Claudia's singular control over how Terry knows the experiences of her life when we as an audience know it's very different is an issue, but is not that dissimilar from when you meet / date new people to begin with (i.e. was their ex really that bad, or were they the problem is sometimes something that can only be known in time). Terry's passivity and mirrored worldview helps enable Claudia's even when she's being destructive to herself and others, and her treating Terry as an exception for his people is also not good in the long run. Clauderry walks this line of being incredibly sweet and uncomfortable, and I think that's one of the things that makes it interesting and with spades of tragedy, particularly going into S7. Terry may not yet have a deep seated issue with dark magic (which enables Claudia but also frees her up to grow on her own terms), but it is the reason they may be torn apart in the future for a time.

I do think they'll find their way back together eventually (even if they'll always be Divorced Eventually in my head). To me, it's clear why they love each other, and while TDP could say that's not enough (and I think that'd be a very interesting valid route to take), I don't think that they will. This scene exists, after all:

[spacemagicandlaserswords]

Open and Waiting (Chapter 3)

Summary: Tech is an Intelligent Dom in more ways than one, Hunter decides he’s had enough casual voyeurism for one day, and you continue to be a good little cockwarmer while remembering that time Crosshair spanked you.  

Relationship: Tech x f!reader, a little bit of Hunter x f!reader, mentions of Crosshair x f!reader, Echo x f!reader and Wrecker x f!reader

Warnings: NSFW, cock warming, voyeurism, domination, submission, Dominant Tech, submissive reader, restraints, collar, wrist cuffs, sexual inexperience, inexperienced reader, naked reader, voyeurism, poor self-worth, spiralling thoughts, feelings, smut with feelings, polyamory, little bit of verbal degradation, praise kink, pretend sci-fi technology/science, pretend Star Wars planets and locations, not beta read, no use of y/n. Mentions of: Oral training, dildos, soft domination, finger sucking, fingers in mouth, spanking, impact play, humiliation, degradation, boot licking, penetration, after care, bruises, vaginal fingering, bacta as lube, video recording of sexual acts.   

Word Count: 1714 (Chapter 3)

Author’s Notes: Please read the warnings! And please let me know if you enjoyed it. Behold, more filth. 

I also wanted to make it clear that everything depicted in this fic is consensual and has been enthusiastically consented to by everyone involved. A lot of what is in this fic could be seen as quite intense, depending on your levels or limits *looks at the giant wall of warnings*. Please know that everyone involved is actively participating in safe kink practices and many open, honest and clear conversations are had between everyone, even if it is not explicitly described in the fic. If it helps, I have a background context detail for this AU that Tech maintains an up to date list of everyone's hard limits, interests and requests, and makes sure everyone's kink contracts are revisited every month and updated if required. None of the Batch tease him for it because they all take safe kink practices very seriously. I hope this comes across in the writing, both in previous and future chapters, but I also wanted to be clear about it here as well.  

Chapters: One, Two, Four, Five, Six | Ao3  

Open and Waiting (Chapter 3)

A hand immediately descends on my head, preventing any hint of movement and halting any further thoughts of trying to take more of Tech’s cock deeper into my mouth. There’s a weight to his hand, a solid presence and a warning. He knew exactly what I’d been trying to do. Sir had been unequivocally clear that I was not allowed to move and I’d just skirted very close to breaking that rule. 

Oh kark, I’ve displeased him. I can’t bear disappointing him and the punishment that follows is always Tech’s own special combination of humiliation, control and mental domination. He knows exactly how to slowly and painstakingly unravel me, all while ensuring that I’m the one begging for my descent into delirium. It always leaves me ruinously shattered and I really just wanted to be a good girl and warm his cock for him. I was doing so well. Why do I always try to bite off more than I can chew? Both metaphorically and literally, in this case. Though I am absolutely not moving anything now, especially not my jaw or mouth. Why did I have to try and push it further and do more? Tech explicitly told me not to move. I’m already pleasing him, why did I have to try and go further? It’s not like I—

Tech’s precise voice cuts through my spiralling thoughts. 

“Our submissive has been doing exceptionally well with their oral training and has been diligent and dedicated in their practice. She has shown consistent and admirable improvement in the length and depth that she is able to be orally penetrated. I am quite pleased with her progress and have no doubt she will turn into an excellent cock slut in time and with continued guidance."

The praise hits me deep in the chest, flaring out to run down my arms and I can’t stop myself from preening at his words. Tech knew. Of course he knew. He’s far too intelligent not to notice when my brain starts running away from me. 

“Hmmm, she’s pretty good already.” Hunter adds. “And watching her suck away at those training dildos that can be mounted to the walls is always a good watch.”

“Yes. Those were an excellent invention of mine.” Tech confidently replies.

“Do you think you’d be able to install a hidden or quick release one on the side of a chair in the cockpit?” asks Hunter. “I prefer to keep her at my knee and it’s easier to control her movement when she’s close by.”

Another shiver runs over my naked skin at the thought. I do enjoy serving at Hunter’s knee. It’s a remarkably peaceful and calming experience. One that has nearly caused me to fall asleep on more than a few occasions. We usually do it when he takes watch. Sitting at his feet, my body leaning against his leg and my head resting against the side of his knee, the blue lights of hyperspace dancing behind my eyelids. Hunter usually keeps me in place with a single hand on my head or wrapped around the nape of my neck. Sometimes I’ll end up sucking on his fingers. Other times he’ll gently run the pad of his thumb or fingers up and down my tongue and I end up drooling on his armour or the floor. I often worry about making a mess but he always reassures me that it doesn’t bother him at all. If anything, it’s actually a good thing. Apparently, all the sensations help to ground him. Having one particular impression to focus on helps to reduce the rest of his senses to background noise. If that’s what it takes to lessen the constant barrage of feedback on his enhanced senses and afford him a moment of relative peace then I will happily have my tongue used as a resting pad for his thumb or fingers. 

Just like it’s currently being used as a resting place for Tech’s cock.

The owner of said cock provides a clipped response to Hunter’s question. 

“Of course I can. I already have plans for such a modification. Would you prefer the pilot’s or co-pilot's chair?”

“Pilot’s.” answers Hunter. “It’s your invention. Besides, Echo might be a bit peeved if he walks into the cockpit one day to find a dildo attached to the armrest of his chair.”

“An amusing discovery, I’m sure.” Tech replies, his dry wit in full force. 

The conversation continues on above me, both of them completely ignoring my bound and open position on the floor. It’s like I’m not even here. They could be having the same conversation over caf or while Tech is torso deep in the guts of the Marauder fixing the latest thing to go wrong with the ship. His legs always end up splayed wide apart when he’s working like that. If I wasn’t so desperate to please and had just a little bit of brat in me, I’d probably eventually snap and go down on him then and there. 

“Nah it’s a fair way off. The towns here are fairly isolated and spread out.”

Hunter’s smokey voice interrupts my rapidly degenerating fantasies about blowing Tech in all sorts of compromising positions. I guess they’ve moved on from talking about me like I’m not even there, despite the fact that I’m right here on my knees under the workbench.

“The others are going to be on their supply run for a while.” Hunter adds.

“Yes. I estimate that they will be away for another 3 hours and 16 minutes.” Tech responds.

“Do you need anything from me before I go back to arguing with this schematic of that Seppie base?” asks Hunter.

“Some peace and quiet would be appreciated. Unless you wish to watch?” Tech’s suggestion hanging in the air.

“Nah, she’s all yours. I’ve got my own ideas for when I get her next. Besides, her arousal’s so strong I can basically taste it.” Hunter comments.

The verbal debasement makes my pussy drip and my mouth somehow even wetter.

“Do not let me keep you from your work.” Tech replies, a clear dismissal and indication that this conversation is over.  

Hunter just snorts in response and turns on his heel before heading back to the bow of the ship. The cockpit door closes and then it’s just Tech and I again in the still silence. The only interruption is the movement and scraping of tools above me as Tech dedicates his full focus to the project in front of him.

Well, maybe not his full, complete focus. 

Tech’s other leg has started bouncing. I can feel the small movements through his thigh where my cheek is currently resting. He always does this when there’s something competing for the attention of his prodigious intellect. The warm, wet presence of my mouth wrapping around his cock must be doing a fairly decent job of distracting him. I wonder how much longer this is going to last? Probably not 3 hours and 16 minutes, unless Tech feels like adding more voyeurism to today's antics. Crosshair always enjoys getting a good eyeful when he can. An amusing attribute for someone who can be a tad possessive when he gets me to himself. I would rib him about it but teasing Crosshair is like playing with fire while doused in petrol and carrying lit matches. That man knows exactly how to cause and wield pain. His sadistic streak is as glaringly obvious as his facial tattoo. Our sessions together are often fairly intense and are a clear reminder of his predilection towards inflicting pain and the satisfaction he gains from watching me disintegrate under his hands. I’d rather not give him even more ammunition, especially after overhearing a brief snippet of a conversation he had with Tech about an idea for an implement that involved spikes.

A shudder runs through me at the thought and I can almost feel the phantom stings across my hide from when our sniper flayed my ass last time. It had been a phenomenal experience, pain and pleasure intertwining into a heady mix of sensation that was impossible to discern where one finished and the other began. Hunter and Echo had watched as Crosshair completely broke me apart, fierce slaps followed by biting strokes of his cane striking again and again over my ass. There is nothing quite so exquisitely humiliating as being reduced to a sobbing and quaking puddle on the floor and then being forced to lick the boot of your current dominant. Of course, he had to take it up a notch by pulling my head up by my hair so I was forced to look straight at the leadership team of my own squad as they observed my pathetic attempts at following Crosshair’s commands. 

It’s a little hard to clean leather with your tongue when you keep crying on it. 

By the time Crosshair was fucking me into the floor, I don’t think I was cogent or present enough to do anything other than lie there and just take it. I hadn’t been quite so physically, mentally and emotionally broken by a scene like that for a while. Thank the Maker they all know exactly what they’re doing when it comes to after care. It had taken me a long time to come back to the world after that, those long limbs wrapped around me like a shield, quiet affirmations murmured in my ear. For someone so outwardly caustic, Crosshair can be remarkably soft when he is so inclined. The bruises he left were an astounding array of blues, purples and blacks. I could barely move properly afterwards and sitting was an exceptionally slow and ginger process. A later application of bacta gel helped but that had quickly devolved into being fingered with bacta gel while bent over the medbay bed. Tech had made some comment about this not being it’s intended use when he walked in halfway through but by that stage Crosshair had two long fingers deep inside me and was running rings around my clit and I did not care. At least it gave Tech another recording of me climaxing to add to his collection. Apparently, I am a “most cooperative subject”. 

Crosshair had actually laughed at that. 

–––  

Author’s Note: Please let me know if you enjoyed it! 

I’ve realised that I appear to be writing this mainly in first person from the perspective of the reader, and in present tense, apart from the memories sections (not sure they really count as proper flashbacks). I know the summaries make use of ‘you’ and so appears to be in second person but I think the majority of this is in first person, or at least I’m trying to keep it as consistent as possible. It’s probably all over the shop though so the ‘not beta read’ warning definitely applies here. 

Reader is not named and is referred to as she/they, you/you’re (when spoken to), submissive or their (the Batch’s) submissive, various derogatory terms (slut, whore etc.), and other more general affectionate terms (darling, dear etc.) and Mando’a endearments (mesh’la, cyar'ika etc.). The latter of these mainly appear in the aftercare scene, which is still so far away at this point. Why have I done this to myself? Write fanfic, they said. It’ll be fun, they said. *sobs* The reader is referred to in a generally objectifying manner, like something that the Batch owns without being explicitly possessive about it, and there is absolutely no use of y/n (guess which fanfic writing trope I can’t stand).   

Tech finally starts to play with you in Chapter 4 and the filthiness factor ratchets up again (somehow). 

Taglist: @queenariesofnarnia @skywlker-sluvtt @techs-assistant @dangraccoon @iamburdened @pheesupremacy @blondie-bluue @motte-the-goblin

[poppetsisters]

I'm gonna challenge myself: I have to say ONE good thing about every MCU thing since Endgame:

Spider-Man: Far From Home: Mysterio's Mocap costume is one of the most genius, galaxy brained adaptations of his comic book costume I've ever seen.

Wandavision: Incredible miniseries with the coolest formatting mechanic. Genuinely the best MCU thing to come out of phase 4, and still the best MCU TV show of them all.

Falcon and the Winter Soldier: US Agent's characterization (before the finale) was incredibly well realized as a critique of American foreign policy and American exceptionalism

Loki S1: The design of the TVA is one of the strongest aesthetics in the MCU.

Black Widow: Haven't seen it, but Florence Pugh is a great actor and I'm glad she's the new Black Widow.

What If...? S1: Some of the episode concepts are interesting.

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings: Retconning the Mandarin to be Tony Leung Chiu-wai while keeping Ironman 3's message of "not assuming all foreign people are terrorists" was a good move. They get to have their cake and eat it too.

Eternals: Any time they're talking about philosophy is my favourite part of the movie.

Hawkeye: Didn't watch it, but I like the Kingpin.

Spider-Man: No Way Home: The suit worn in the final swing is my favourite live action Spider-Man costume.

Moon Knight: I liked the episode that was a specific reference to Jeff Lemire's run on the character.

Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness: Elizabeth Olsen slays as a villain, also the entire section where Strange astral projects into his zombified body is genuinely one of my top 10 MCU moments.

Ms Marvel: Very colourful and stylish show with a perfectly cast Kamala Khan.

Thor: Love and Thunder: I liked it when Thor wore the classic costume when he was doing that running montage.

I Am Groot: Didn't watch it, but looks cute.

She-Hulk: The gag where we saw an 80s TV Movie version of She-Hulk got a chuckle out of me.

Werewolf By Night: Getting jumpscared by the Marvel Studios intro was incredible. The whole presentation was visually and audibly fantastic. they should let Michael Giacchino cook more.

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever: The entire adaptation of Namor and Atlantis becoming a Mesoamerican culture genuinely makes it way more interesting than its comics counterpart.

Guardians of the Galaxy Christmas Special: I can't believe they let James Gunn do this. Very fun special with Mantis being the clear highlight.

Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania: I like that this movie didn't make a whole lot of money at the Box Office.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3: I could say several good things about this movie but I'll say that Chukwudi Iwuji's performance as The High Evolutionary is one of the best MCU performances. He should've been Kang.

Secret Invasion: Didn't watch it, but I remember Fury had a decent speech about the civil rights movement I guess.

Loki S2: I still think about the scene in the record store a lot.

The Marvels: This film is just a very fun time and handled its three leads well. It finally made me like Captain Marvel as a character.

What If...? S2: Kahhori is a cool character and should be in future movies.

Echo: Didn't watch it, but Alaqua Cox deserves the world.

Deadpool and Wolverine: The bit where Handsome Deadpool said "The Proposal" and Default Deadpool got personally offended made me laugh.

[danhanly]

Hogwarts Legacy: Bigotry, Boycotting & Activism

I've been reading a lot of the discourse surrounding the impending release of Hogwarts Legacy, and it's time I communicated my thoughts in the spirit of this blog, i.e. talking about stuff I'm wholly unqualified to talk about that nobody even asked me to talk about.

To get the obvious stuff out of the way first. Yes, I support trans rights, I believe JK Rowling is a bigot, and she is a TERF who has done significant damage to trans rights. Yes, I have also pre-ordered Hogwarts Legacy, and I have no intention of cancelling.

I'm confident that as a result, I'd be recognised on neither 'side' of the fence regarding this particular issue. The trans-rights side would lambast me for purchasing the game, and the TERF side would lambast me for my views of trans-rights and JK's bigotry, so I sit in this no-mans-land between the issues, despite feeling personally aligned in almost every way to the trans-rights side of the debate.

There is a significant cognitive dissonance here for many people, myself included. On the one hand, we're simply following our tastes in entertainment as we should typically be allowed to do. On the other hand, we're forced to take sides in an exceptionally complex and multi-layered debate in which both sides insist it's really simple. How does one resolve this cognitive dissonance? By using the time-honoured tradition of just 'not thinking about it'. But then here I am, thinking about it in-depth, so I'm writing it all out since this is the only way I can resolve the chaos within my skull cave.

I feel the trans-rights side of the debate is right; they have the high ground, and morally, trans people should be given the rights and freedoms that JK Rowling is campaigning to take from them. However, I need to be absolutely clear, I am simply not qualified to prop up either side in the debate, I am simply the 'general public', the 'masses'. I'm not an activist, and I shouldn't be expected to be an activist by either side of the debate.

The process of creating an activist is firstly understanding the issue at hand, secondly being directly or indirectly involved by association with the issue, and thirdly (and perhaps most importantly) having the energy and inclination to rise above the 'masses' to push your point. I fail every single one of those checks. I have incredible respect for activists who campaign ceaselessly to change society for the better, but I'm not one of them, nor should I be expected to be.

"If you purchase Hogwarts Legacy, you're supporting a bigoted agenda" is something I see more and more when it comes to this debate. I have no doubt that people can produce receipts to show how JK Rowling will profit from the sales, but the more you reduce an argument to its most emotionally-charged elements, the more you strip out all the nuance.

There's a reason that Hogwarts Legacy has broken records when it comes to pre-orders, and that's because Harry Potter is a hugely successful franchise and fandom, and what the studio has created looks to be a great addition to that franchise. It looks fun and engaging and includes many features I look for in video games.

In the current culture in which we live, products can be enjoyed by consumers entirely divorced from the political leanings of those who benefit from its sale. You can make a strong argument as to why this shouldn't be the case, and I may be inclined to agree, though we'd both have to understand that affecting this change, in reality, would be momentous, if not impossible.

When I purchase a milk bottle, I don't look up the voting history of the farmer; I don't think "who profits from this bottle of milk," or "I wonder if the glass bottle was made by someone who supports Brexit," or "I heard a terrible rumour about the guy who drove the van to deliver the milk from the Tesco distribution centre to the Tesco Extra store I bought it from." If we did, nobody would buy Nestle products due to their global bad-actor stance, Apple products due to the literal children building the iPhones or any modern fashion brand that uses sweatshop labour. A certain amount of activists will care about the harm in the supply chain, but the vast majority of consumers will not. Buying an Apple product doesn't mean you support child labour, buying a T-shirt from ASOS doesn't mean you support the use of sweatshops, and buying a KitKat because you're hungry for a snack doesn't mean that you believe water isn't a human right, of-course-it-fucking-doesn't!

We'd live in a beautiful utopia if people voted with their wallets in this way. Still, they don't and never will; asking people to do so is unrealistic and serves no purpose but to harm the overall effort. To affect this level of change would require such an exceptional societal shift that I don't think it'd ever really be possible.

Perhaps I feel this way because I'm separate from the debate. After all, I don't know any trans people and have never personally experienced any of the same types of bigotry. I'm an outlier to the activism and the actual issue at hand. This is perhaps why I'm not taking a more active stance in the debate. Even knowing that I'm still allowed to have an opinion, I'm still able to believe in the experience of others and use that to inform my choices.

Maybe I'm just a cynic, but cancelling someone for their views isn't an effective change; it's temporary, only until society as an entity forgets about them (see: Louis CK's recent sell-out comedy tour). The actual effective change is in voting and fundamental policy shifts. So when some trans-rights activists call for a boycott of Hogwarts Legacy, all they're calling for is a temporary stay of sales for no further benefit. Society will forget about this debate. A year or two after release, the argument will have simmered down or diverted in a different direction, and it'll pop up on sale in a game store, and people will buy it. Some will say it's about "sending a message," but it's broken pre-order records, so what exactly is 'the message'?

Once an activist 'converts' one of the 'general public' members over to their side, that person doesn't become an activist, but they will vote differently next time they have an opportunity to do so.

Activists on both sides are the players in a game of tug-of-war. We, the masses, the public, are bound within the rope. Governments, laws and policies are like the little flag in the centre that'll tell you which side has won. Activists will pull us one way or another, but at no point will a strand of the rope get up and start pulling too; we are and will forever be 'the rope'. Without a rope, activists have nothing to pull; without activists, the rope lies limp; without activists or a rope, the government entity that sits at the centre will never change. All parts of the equation rely on one another, but we must start appreciating that not everyone thinks like an activist.

I am within the rope, and to me, the activists on the trans rights side of the debate are valiantly pulling the flag over to their side. So, whenever I get a chance to do so, I will support and vote for real change that affects trans rights, be it by party or referendum or donation to a relevant charity. I won't be making this issue my life's mission and making this issue the backdrop of every decision I make. I'm not a paragon of virtue and justice, I'm just a 'me' doing 'me shit', and like every other homo-sapien on this god-forsaken orb sometimes that feels contradictory, overly complex, nuanced, or just plain confusing.

There's no correct answer; everything feels like the wrong move, and what's being asked of consumers is unrealistic. The decision to buy or not buy a game should never be this hard. I'll continue to support LGBTQ through more traditional means (like charity donations or voting for parties that specifically campaign against bigotry) despite how others feel about me buying the game.

A cop-out, maybe? I don't know. Perhaps I'm just mired in a cynical view of society. Who the fuck asked me anyway, right?

[disneyfemslashcomics]

Hi!! I'm sure you've been asked this before so feel free to ignore this but what are your favorite Disney femslash ships? I have a lot that I like, but some of my own faves are Esmeralda/Jasmine, Aurora/Snow White, Merida/Mulan, Elsa/Isabela, and Ariel/Moana!! (Also, thank you for your post about blocking people who post AI art in the tags lol. I will not say who but someone I followed for a long time whose blog I loved started suddenly posting about AI stuff and I had to unfollow. It was crazy to me because they themself were an artist who didn't seem to realize or mind that AI art steals from artists like them.)

Oh my but this is one of my favorite questions and the answers do change over time.

Right now my favorite ships are (in no particular order)

Alice/ Wendy Darling (particularly my interpretation of them as adults)

Snow White/Jasmine (honestly OTP of all time material, ask me about them and I'll tell you)

Tiana/Cinderella

Snow White /Luisa - they're so cute

Esmeralda/Isabela

As for AI, I do have some room for nuance in it. There are tools that look at patterns in images and try to complete the pattern that I think would be incredibly useful and are notably not theft as they're largely pulling from an image that you're choosing to feed into it, and things like clip studio paint's auto colorize specifically when taking partially colored images, where I could see it being exceptionally useful to comic artists if you could control the inputs to only be your own art. My understanding of things like this is that they're also less of an energy drain and more sustainable, which is not a small issue when you're talking about full scale generative ai.

Where AI is right now isn't ethical. I want to make myself clear too that my biggest issue with AI is the destruction of the community aspects of fandom, because it's true that it steals and uses a lot of energy but the same can technically be said of AMVs and I'm pretty sure that we all like those here. I'm not inherently opposed to image manipulation and mash-ups, even of my own work, but I do want for people to be able to find my art and be able to talk to me and ask me to draw things if they want.

People who are generating images in private don't have to talk to anyone in order to get more of the same type of image, and while it's still definitely possible to share things around and make friends through mutual appreciation of the same thing and sharing that thing, it's not really the same experience as talking to people and building things together.

I want for people to make friends and talk to people, especially queer folks who are more likely to be isolated. And I want for artists to be included in the communities that they're making works for.

[truckreincarnation]

Guess who DOES have that Ability? | Avery | Trial 4.2 | Re: Theo, Manami, Nao, Shinjuku

Softly, Avery asks Theophania something that only those listening more carefully can hear, given Avery is sitting right next to her. “I can purify the ringing in your ears too, if you like.” 

Theophania gives her agreement, so with a gentle hand reached out to touch her cheek (unnecessarily) and a soft light of a mixed success, that Purify+1 has been done… and the last of Theo’s HP is healed as well!

And then, first. Quick thing at Manami.

“It’s… not stupid, Manami, thank you for clearing that up. Just… checking possibilities.” A nod towards her. 

And then, they silently look between Nao and Theophania... before speaking up.

  “I… do have an ability like that. Not an immunity to explosives in particular, but I’m… I can entirely avoid damaging myself with my own, because of my scales. I’ve tested it. If I’m the one to throw a bomb even close to myself, to cause rubble to fall, I don’t get hurt anymore. My new shield is also exceptionally good at blocking things like that, as well as firing explosives too. The highest form of fire shroud also does that too, preventing damage. So… I don’t know. I don’t know if someone else has an ability like that to use on… themself, at least, or if they did. But…”

They pause, going quiet again for a moment, before speaking up again about another matter.

  “...I’d like to clarify and identify something else for all of you too, just for the record. Between the mangled pieces of metal around the gate’s area, which themselves were not anywhere near Frank, Luz, or Theophania, by the way, and the amount of Explosive crystals taken from the Crafting room since I’d been there last, I think it’s highly likely that the bomb in question would have had to be larger than the handheld slingshot would have been able to fire, before anyone else suggests that. To my estimate, the slingshot could fire an object up to at most half a foot in diameter, and the combined size of the pieces for the bomb would have had to be larger than that.”

“It also would have had to be reasonably heavy. That would also be not impossible to throw, for some particularly strong people at least, but very difficult at least, and very inefficient. So in my personal opinion, it’s much more likely that it was instead some sort of explosive set up near the gate itself, and triggered either on a delay or… some other way. A long and slow burning fuse or thin trail of gunpowder which does in fact burn slowly, for example would be extremely easy to set up." Or easy for them at least.

“After all, that’s… the kind missing from the craft room is the same crystal that I use in my own standard stronger grenades that I designed myself, but those have much, much less of a blast zone in order to keep them portable and safe to deploy. There had to have been more than just one or two of those crystals used. If… anyone wants to see one to prove this, I even have my infinite bomb pouch on hand, and I could take one of my grenades apart for you all.” They gesture to one of the Two bomb pouches they have on still, ready at all times. 

………..This was the second time there had been a murder case involving one of the crystals that Avery regularly handles in their bomb making, huh? Christ. Somehow, they find themself giving a small inappropriate laugh.

“…Ahaha. Did you know that the recommended evacuation range for a standard pipe bomb if outdoors is actually 850 feet…? And this explosive was more powerful than that would be, too…”

They trail off, mumbling to themself. No, no, they couldn’t get lost in their own thoughts, couldn’t let their mind wander too far off topic. They shake their head to clear it, and take a deep breath. Behind them, their tail is twitching in small, nervous movements, but they do their best to ignore it.  

What were they doing again? Ah, right. They turn to Manami and then Shinjuku, frowning while they process those things more. 

  “Ah… That’s… If Frank was capable of dispelling it on his own, then… Did he really… hurt himselfsomehow…? Because either him or Luz did have to be unjuried in that third ping, if all of your other bondmates confirmed they weren’t hurt.” Avery frowns. “I know that Shroud said that both Luz and Frank had… signs of damage from an ‘arcing electrical shock’, and I assumed it was from the gate, though I guess he could have… shocked himself? Can he do that with his elemental ability…? Or… would hitting yourself dispel it??” 

“I don’t know how it works to that extent, though I suppose we could… test it if needed, on what happens if Theo gives it to someone who’s not fully incapacitated. But I don’t think shrapnel would be delayed like that if it was possibly a minute later either way, if that’s what you mean by a moment, and we didn’t find evidence of other objects around them.”

That was all their best explanation as an expert, at least.

[kwtlucky]

SuiPad may be a unused social media platform that combines the basic components of conventional social systems with blockchain innovation. It is outlined to supply clients with a secure and straightforward environment to connected, share substance, and gain rewards for their endeavors. SuiPad guarantees to revolutionize the way individuals interface by utilizing its interesting focal points such as user-generated substance control, decentralized organize design, built-in compensate instruments and more.

The Highlights of SuiPad

At the center of SuiPad lies its highlights which separate it from other stages on the showcase nowadays. It offers clients an instinctive however easy-to-navigate interface which permits them to effortlessly make posts, transfer pictures and recordings or lock in in comments or private messages. Besides, it gives built-in wallet get to which permits clients to exchange stores securely between each other inside seconds in any case of geological remove. Furthermore, its progressed calculations offer assistance ensure clients from improper substance whereas fulfilling them for directing or hailing undesirable fabric appropriately; subsequently making a self-regulating environment where everybody benefits from one another’s exertion in making beyond any doubt that great benchmarks are maintained on the arrange - no require for outside organizations like Facebook does with its human arbitrators!

Tokenomics & Guide

The victory of any stage depends to a great extent on how it is able to incentivize individuals into utilizing it – something that SuiPad does superbly through tokenomics (a term utilized when talking about cryptocurrency). The local token – SUIP – serves as both an motivating force compensate framework as well as a medium of trade inside the environment; basically permitting clients to advantage fiscally by engaging more effectively on the arrange (e.g., directing posts) or getting a charge out of premium administrations such as higher information capacity capacity etcetera by means of investing tokens specifically (so also how you'd pay cash when utilizing other conventional applications). To guarantee maximum utility in terms of both utilization & liquidity over worldwide markets, these tokens will be accessible for listing/trading at major trades world wide beginning 2021; subsequently permitting anybody inquisitive about taking part in this another era social media stage pick up get to with ease & comfort at anytime - no matter where they are found!

My Examination: Is Suipad worth contributing?

Suipad is looking promising in fact but whether worth contributing or not? As per my conclusion yessuipad can demonstrate out unmatchable potential on the off chance that we see towards close future .This extend has as of now picked up notoriety among masses but still there's much scope cleared out .In expansion group behind this extend genuinely knows what clients needs sealing suipads value .From client point see there are innumerable benefits like money related rewards , premiumadministrations etcetera but all these comes under single roof i cruel supad hence making it completely independent environment not at all like most existing stages who depend upon third parties/agencies for certain assignments hence demonstrating out suipads amazingness over others

Input almost SuIPAD

I had as of late come over a few companions talking approximately this modern energizing blockchain based social media stage called “SuIPAD” so naturally I chosen to provide it a try myself as well see what all buzz was almost... And boy I must admit - I wasn't baffled one bit! Not as it were did I discover numerous valuable highlights such as wallet get to & built-in rewards component but too felt exceptionally secure knowing my information was secure much obliged to decentralized engineering utilized by designers here at SuIPAD - unquestionably exceptionally amazing without a doubt! Exceedingly prescribe giving this stage your consideration in case haven't as of now done so!

SuIPAD Crew3 Occasion

For those who didn't know as of now - 'Crew3' occasion organized as of late by group over at 'SuIPAD' demonstrated out extraordinary victory without a doubt pulling in wide extend group of onlookers all through globe whereas giving us profitable understanding with respect to future heading taken up by designers here.. This occasion marks extraordinary turning point both commerce astute / showcasing astute accomplished by group effectively displaying genuine soul behind concept laid down initially. 🚀💥

[lokilickedme]

I am very pleased to announce that after my mother, a drug lord, an entitled Karen with a vicious one-eyed dog, various noisy one-nighters at the motel, two irritable ranchhands and a herd of murderous peacocks, WE FINALLY HAVE GOOD NEIGHBORS.

My god it took moving 1200 miles to make it happen but it finally happened and I don’t even know what to do with myself, I’m so stupidly thrilled.  The lady is just old enough to be my mom, meaning she’s also just old enough to be Big and Little’s grandmom, which is exactly what all of us need...and yesterday she proved her willingness to be exactly that :)

(under the cut because there’s some blood and icky medical stuff mentioned)

.

So I’m fixing supper and using an abnormally sharp kitchen knife to separate frozen hamburger patties from each other, as one does when one is stupid, and the inevitable happens - slip, slice, MOTHERFUCK, blood.  Thumb damn near severed at the joint.  Husband is outside with the neighbor man, an exceptionally friendly old guy who tends to be exceptionally versed in just about everything you’re too lazy to look up on your own, so I slip on my fuzzy slippers and trot out there with my hand wrapped up in a paper towel to ask him and Tom if they think I need medical assistance.  Frank says “Alright lets see it” so I unwrap.

Tom literally steps back into the street clutching his stomach.  Frank nods his head once and says “Yep, better get goin’.”  But since medical care is a little bit out of the question at the moment monetarily, I gotta argue about it.  So Frank tells me to go inside his house and ask his wife, she’s raised a bunch of kids and grandkids and has seen some shit.  I’m 53, about to be 54, and have seen some shit too...but something about a mom-aged older lady telling me what to do sounds really good right about now.  That plus I’m getting a bit lightheaded and my blood pressure is soaring.

So I go inside and Maryanne is sitting at the kitchen table in an EYE PATCH, which...shame on me, I bust out laughing and just almost call her Director Fury.  I’m gonna plead blood loss and shock at having my almost-amputated thumb wrapped up in a Bounty Quicker Picker Upper and let it go at that.  She gives me a quick summation, something about eye shots for a condition she has, and points at my hand.  “What’d you do, let’s see it.”

I unwrap and hold it out.  “You think it needs stitches?”

She doesn’t even bat an eye.  She literally can’t because of the eye patch, but still.  “Yep, two.  At least.”  She puts down the pill bottle and starts to stand up.  “You going in those?”  She’s looking down at my fuzzy slippers, which are now muddy and messing up her floor.

Ugh, I don’t want stitches.  Mostly I don’t want a $1400 ER bill, but I’ve had enough stitches in my life thanks.  “Think I can get away with just, like, taping it back together?  I did that with Little’s eyebrow.”

She gives me that look.  “So that’s what happened to him.”

Tom and Frank come stomping in just about then and Tom pulls out his phone.  “My friend is a vet, he can sew it up.”

Frank busts out laughing.  “You’re gonna send your wife to a vet?!”

Tom, I swear to god, is already dialing.  “Yeah, he’s a horse vet.”

Maryanne sighs, and then in a defining moment that I will always remember as the exact moment I decided this is my new mom, clears her throat and says, “Neiiiiiiigh.”  You know, like a horse neigh’ing.  Also indicating NO.  She waves her hand at me as she’s heading out of the room.  “Sit down before you fall down, are you allergic to tea tree oil?”

.

About a half hour later she’s got me patched up.  Thumb still attached, very clean and sanitized and antibacc’ed to hell and back, pulled tight with surgical tape and wrapped and bound with gauze and nice neat little closing bandages.  No vet necessary, though Tom does go ahead and call him (for the record he told us to go the ER, he was on his day off and wasn’t in the mood to stitch human pieces back on...he doesn’t like humans very much).  And Maryanne tells me I still should see a medical professional because even though she’s done a pretty professional looking job herself, she can’t vouch for the lack of severed tendons or what have you.  She could tell while it was gaping open that I’d cut into the cartilage, but beyond that, who knows?  Damn knife set the realtor gave us as a new-house gift...Maryanne says they gave her one too and the first thing she did was slice off a fingertip.  Somebody oughtta sue.

Anyway, a couple of hours later the shock has worn off and the pain has set in and I can see the tip of my thumb is starting to turn a concerning shade of deep plum, so Tom calls his mother and we ask her a bunch of leading questions until her memory kicks back in and she starts spouting directions to an emergency walk-in clinic that’s cheaper than the hospital ER.  The best she can do is name off a couple things around it, so I Google until I find it, and then I drive myself out there and stick my wrapped hand up on the desk and tell the receptionist, “You don’t want to see this, but there’s a thumb held on with a bandaid under all that.  Can somebody look at it?”

Ten or so minutes later - me and one surly man who sits staring angrily at me are the only ones there - I’m in a treatment room with a practitioner and she’s unwrapping my thumb while I sit with my eyes closed, because I know that sucker’s gonna fall off and roll across the table as soon as she undoes all that gauze and I don’t want to watch her scramble to catch it.  And then she says “Wow, somebody did a good job.”

The cut - over an inch long and all the way to the bone - is closed and holding nicely.  I can move my thumb and it doesn’t fall off.  There’s no concerning swelling or freaky discoloration - the deep plum was simply because Maryanne had wrapped it so tight - and everything seems to be non-catastrophic.  The doc betadine’s it and then slathers a bunch of surgical glue all over it and binds it back up and I’m headed home again ten minutes later with my thumb still attached, no stitches, a narrowly escaped tetanus shot (thank god it was a brand new knife) and by god a new mom.  I’m claiming her, she’s mine.  Next door neighbor lady doesn’t know what she’s getting into but she’s got a new daughter and some new rowdy grandkids, and I’ve already broken her in real good and proper by bleeding on her table and tracking mud across her kitchen floor.  We’re bound for life now.

She’s even short and redheaded, you guys.  We look more alike than me and my real mother do.

And she doesn’t own a dog.

[mandana-the-service-pup]

TLDR // I made this a long post for my records. I tried to keep it interesting. Mandana was great. She sniffed some people a little but did amazing alerts. The doctor was useful and will help manage the remaining prescriptions. I was diagnosed with mild scoliosis (mostly likely caused by my EDS) but it doesn’t change anything.

Mandana’s first doctors appointment was a huge success!

She was a bit excited when we got to the hospital, but she went potty on command, maintained a good heel and her general behavior was acceptable. I didn’t expect too much from her because she hasn’t advanced to appointments in the curriculum yet but in my opinion she totally knocked it out of the park.

The hospital building was old, so all of the rooms were very cramped. This made it impossible to keep people at a manageable distance. I tried not to be too hard on her when she wanted to give a little wag & sniff to people approaching us. It’s been months since we’ve done public access training and this was her first time visiting a hospital or attending an appointment. Expecting her to completely ignore someone who was physically brushing up against us would have been unfair.

I did try to manage her behavior as much as possible. I made it clear to the people involved that she was still in training and she’s still learning how to ignore people, but in my mind all I could think was how grateful I was for having an awesome service dog prospect. I was throwing her into a situation she was definitely not prepared for & the only mistake she made was being too quick to make friends with people. She was setup to fail and fail she did, but she did it gracefully 🥺

Her alerts were spectacular!

Besides those little stolen moments, her performance was better than expected. She was eager to do any position change or behavior I asked of her. She relaxed on her mat in the waiting room for nearly 50 minutes and held her position when I had to go to the counter several times for paperwork. She alerted to the first spike (159 bpm) when I was standing in line waiting for instructions. The second alert was done ten minutes later when my heart rate started to rise again even though I was sitting down (148 bpm). Twenty minutes later she indicated a more serious alert. My heart rate had plummeted and it was about to shoot up again with a 100 bpm difference. Those kinds of drastic changes are usually what make me the most symptomatic, so I tried to prepare myself. Just moments after the alert, they nurse called my name and had me walk to the back for vitals. I informed them about the episode I was experiencing and sure enough my blood pressure was 146/90.

That room was HECTIC!

When I told the nurse I was experiencing a medical episode I was hoping they would be able to take steps to help me mitigate it. Of course that did not happen, so all I could do was push through the best I could. I was assigned to an exceptionally tiny room with a very small desk, several chairs and an exam table. That left only enough standing room for one person at a time (unless the door was open in which case, good luck).

I don’t know if it comes across in pictures, but Mandana is a BIG girl. Like yes, she’s a bit on the chubby side for a working Malinois, but she was also the third biggest puppy in a litter of 12, outweighed only by her two massive brothers. The last time I measured her (which I admit was hard for me to do accurately) she was 26” at the shoulder. She is currently overweight but even at her ideal working weight she would still be about 70lbs. I knew I was going to need a large dog if I needed bracing, so I was looking for lines that had more substantial builds, but tbh I’m a small handler so it’s kind of overkill 😅

So there I was trying to fit a pony in a sock drawer with my blood pressure and heart rate maxing out my personal records. To complicate things further, the nurse informed me that she too had been diagnosed with POTS! My first thought was, “That’s great! You must know how to help me manage this situation!” Oh boy was I wrong. She didn’t sound like a seasoned spoonie and the look on her face when she realized she was meeting a Potsie IRL for the first time was pure disbelief. We had a chaotic & moving conversation. I could go into further details about what we talked about and how this disease affected her, but the people who’ve lived it already know what I would say & the people who haven’t could never understand. She was not able to help because she also needed help. I’ll leave it at that.

I tried my best to make sense of everything and that bewilderment seemed to rub off on Mandana. After waiting patiently for nearly an hour she had been quickly led into a maze of a rooms that smelled like a hundred people & cued to crawl under a desk. Then two girls sat in front of her, blocking her in. Both of which smelled like medical alerts. I tried to convince her to just lay down and relax but I was simultaneously trying to get my vitals taken & maintain a bizarre conversation. Properly managing the situation was hopeless so I just did the best I could while Mandana snorted this girls pants leg and bonked her head on the table. After she left Mandana was able to settle.

The Rheumatologist was ok.

It’s always difficult to establish care with a new doctor, but it didn’t help I was having a medical episode and managing a SDiT at the same time. Despite having everything memorized and written down, it took longer than was comfortable for either of us to patch together a medical history. At one point I hit a well-known road block. Does this girl have a real diagnosis or is she doing this for attention? I simply name-dropped my specialist & a quick search for her qualifications was enough to smooth things over and immediately get the prescriptions I needed. It was such a Girl Boss moment on behalf of my specialist 😜

At the end of the appointment he did a casual physical exam (Zebras know the drill 🙄) and randomly mentioned that I have scoliosis. I’ve suspected some degree of scoliosis since I was a teenager but I passed every annual exam for it at my school & no chiropractor or doctor ever brought it up (with the exception of an X-ray tech who made a passing comment about my rib cage being uneven, but that kind of stuff can get them in trouble so he refused to talk to me the rest of the time). The Rheumatologist suspects it’s caused by my EDS. He said it will continue to get worse over time but should remain mild. It may cause back pain when I’m older but should never be so bad that it requires a brace or surgery.

It was a long day.

Mandana & I were both glad when the appointment ended and we could leave. She enjoyed her hospital adventure but it was a lot to ask of her. I wish I could say the rest of the day was better but unfortunately that’s not how any of this works. My heart rate continued to worsen which led to Hubbins & I getting into a spat. I’m usually the one who de-escalates conflict but you try telling that to someone with 180 bpm and a Malinois at their side! We don’t harbor a lot of ill-feelings between us so we got over it quickly and headed home. The drive was silent and felt like it lasted forever thanks to severe motion sickness & a traffic jam on the highway.

I’ll be feeling the effects of this day for a while thanks to MCAS. It wasn’t all bad but it’s a good example of why I don’t like scheduling appointments.

I did eventually ask Mandana what she thought about her day.

Her official opinion:

Hospital Adventure / Good

Stranger Friends / Good

Big Car Ride / Bad 😭😭😭

[thevoice101]

7 Steps to Manifest Your Intentions

We as a whole need to show things in our lives. We set our expectations on what we need and we stand by and imagine that the Pattern of energy attracting similar energy isn’t working. The Pattern of good following good is an all inclusive regulation and it is bomb verification. So we need to ask ourselves, what are we doing that is holding us back from getting what we truly care about. Setting our goals is the simple aspect, however what do we think and words telling the universe?

Do we keep on believing that we will really get what we need or do we begin to get negative when we don’t see it happening immediately? Assuming you are like us, we obviously and strikingly set our expectations on what we need yet when we see no development happening immediately, we begin to address and allow our self image to outdo us imagining that its not intended to be or that we won’t be great at it or that we don’t merit it.

I have been currently going into business. I’m full power ahead and setting my expectations on how much cash I need to produce or how enormous the business will be. Then inside the following day or somewhere in the vicinity, I begin allowing my contemplations to sneak in to “consider the possibility that it doesn’t succeed?” or “imagine a scenario where I can’t bring in sufficient cash?” or “how could individuals need to go with MY Organization?” Those contemplations address questions and an absence of confidence and are deciding my new expectations, which are disappointment. How might I hope to succeed when I’m yelling out to the universe about disappointment?

So how might you make your expectations manifest?

Click here for Manifestation Miracle

1. Set your Expectations 

Setting clear aims are so significant. Conclude what it is that you need to accomplish. Whether it is the ideal relationship, another vehicle, monetary flourishing or a free lunch. I like to record my expectations in blue ink. This conveys a higher energy and by explicitly stating it, it makes them exceptionally understood. Then, record why you need that specific goal. Make it about the inclination. So assuming you need monetary thriving, it isn’t the case you can purchase what you need yet it is more about opportunity. The opportunity to do what you need, when you need. A relationship would be tied in with having friendship, not tied in with getting hitched or not being distant from everyone else or having somebody to take care of a portion of the bills. Bring out the feelings that accompany getting what you need. Presently you need to record the feelings that you will encounter when you have your goal. That ideal relationship will make me so blissful and cheerful, feeling warm and protected, happy, revived, amped up for life. I will have my heart pulsating quickly and feel delighted realizing that I have somebody close by on my excursion through life. The expectation sends your solicitation out into the universe, and the feelings step the sign back in.

2. Address any blocks

We can show anything that we want, however assuming we have blocks in our subliminal that let us know that we don’t merit or aren’t sufficient to have those things, we will always be unable to get them. I have a companion that has been a tycoon multiple times, and has lost everything and sought financial protection after each time. He can rapidly show however somewhere down in the psyche, he doesn’t completely accept that he deserves having it. On the off chance that we have a mindset of missing the mark on, ordinarily comes from a position of disgracefulness. I for one had the experience of a conviction that I didn’t merit a solid relationship and despite the fact that I worked really hard on showing and planning what that relationship would resemble, I needed to dig profoundly to find the reason why I was not accomplishing it. When I had the option to recover profoundly inside myself and pull that weed of not meriting, in no less than about fourteen days, my ideal relationship showed up and I had the option to clutch it.

3. Still your psyche

The most effective way to show is to escape your head and get in to a Theta perspective. The Theta state is where we span the cognizant and the psyche mind. This is the perspective that a small kid lives in. To this end they are so receptive and where deceptions are framed. Theta cerebrum waves can be viewed as the psyche; they administer the piece of our brain that lies between the cognizant and the oblivious and hold recollections and sentiments. They additionally direct your convictions and your way of behaving. Theta waves are consistently inventive, described by sensations of motivation and very spiritual.â�¨ It is accepted that this psychological state permits you to act underneath the level of the cognizant brain. Theta is the primary phase of the stage when we dream. Intervention is an incredible method for getting into the theta state. This is where we get when we are spellbound or we fall into the REM pattern of rest. There are a lot of directed intercessions on YouTube that can assist you with getting to that perspective on the off chance that you are a fledgling. You will feel when your psyche gets into that state, time is running out, no sensation of your body and no external mindfulness. In the event that you can’t exactly get into Theta, then, at that point, Alpha is a decent beginning. Consider your cerebrum a radio gets and conveys signals. At the point when you enter an Alpha recurrence you are “exchanging” stations from getting, which is Beta mode to sending mode where you can zero in on an exceptionally clear aim. On the off chance that you’ve at any point been driving a daydreaming and an extraordinary thought has jumped into your head, it is logical you were in an Alpha state.

4. Imagine

This is the tomfoolery part. This is where we get to utilize our creative mind and get into the mentality of a youngster. Here, the sky’s the limit. We are co-makers and we get to plan what that expectation will resemble. In the event that you need a major house, envision that large house. Live in the house, experience what you feel assuming you were strolling around that house, going into your room, maneuvering into the carport, swimming in the pool. Live it!! Assuming that it is a relationship you need, hit the dance floor with your accomplice, feel yourself in their arms, hear what they would say to you, kiss them, hold them, smell them. Make it as genuine as possible. At the point when you summon the feelings, this is where you raise your vibration to be in congruence with the vibration of the wish that you want. Clutch the picture for no less than 60 seconds and afterward continue on toward the following one. We recommend staying with a couple for each reflection so you can remain on track and make however much detail as could reasonably be expected. Feel yourself breathing distinctively and your body responding to the feelings. It ought to feel genuine to you like it has previously worked out.

5. Discharge the Picture 

Whenever you have caught the pictures and the feelings, you will deliver the picture once again into the universe. By sending your aims back out, you are delivering it and relinquishing any connection to it. You are telling the Universe that you have given up it and realize that you will get it when all is good and well. Just drop it. When you put in a request for an item on the web, you don’t continue onward back to the site verifying whether your request went through. This is where you should deal with your confidence. Try not to uncertainty or question assuming it will work out, you must have a Realization that it has previously worked out. Allow the universe to deal with the subtleties. At the point when your expectation is clear, the system will show up.

6. Favor and Offer

Thanks Whenever you have delivered the pictures, send a gift alongside them. Favor your new home, your monetary overflow, and your new relationship and afterward offer Thanks for everyone. As Dr. Joe Dispense states in his book Bringing an end to the Propensity for Acting naturally, “Appreciation is a definitive condition of receivership.”

7. Work with Your Protections

After you have finished the above advances, check with yourself to check whether there is any obstruction. Dread is typically the impetus that can attack our goals. Observe any feelings of dread that you might be clutching and what parts you stand up to. Attempt to communicate them in words. For instance, here are a few feelings of dread you could experience when you ponder showing 1,000,000 bucks:

• It will be excessively unpleasant

• Individuals will be threatened by you

• Life will get convoluted

• Dread you will lose everything

Assuming you believe your aims should show, it is critical to wipe out those fears that are clashing with your goals. When all the apprehension is gone, your aims will show without any problem. Be that as it may, as long as you neglect to address your feelings of dread, no measure of power will allow your expectations to show.

One of the most straightforward ways of disposing of your apprehensions is to acknowledge them. Quit taking care of your apprehensions with purposeful energy, and simply permit them to be. For instance, on the off chance that you just acknowledge that in the event that you showed $1 million, your accounting may to be sure be more convoluted. Then you are done giving energy to that trepidation. You’ve downsized the apprehension into a final product.

The contrast between a trepidation and an outcome is acknowledgment. Dread, basically, is Bogus Proof Showing up Genuine. Which makes us insane. A result is a result you acknowledge. At the point when we give energy to the apprehension, you are basically opposing your craving, thus making more trepidation and not permitting your appearance of $1million to occur. We manifest anything we center our considerations around. Tycoons, for example, Bill Doors express that he generally realized he would have been a multi-mogul. Get in that attitude and you will show your cravings. This is becoming a “vibrational match” for your goals.

Cheerful Showing!

Click here for Manifestation Miracle

[blackspoon99]

The Sign of Three Pt. 2

Sherlock x Female! Reader

TW: Mention of Blood and Near Death, Spoilers to Season 3!

Part 1

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

You took your seat at the head table and found yourself relieved that you were sat in between Janine and Sherlock. You felt immediate guilt at that thought. Dinner was slightly tense and awkward. Possibly only for you. For the most part, you made small talk with Janine while Sherlock read over his stack of index cards. Little boughs of anxiety kept creeping in the back of your mind as you replayed Sherlock and Janine’s conversation over and over. You peeked over at Sherlock to your right and took a healthy sip of champagne. You decided you would try your best to be present. This day wasn’t about you, after all. Your attention was pulled to the center of the room when a waiter tapped a spoon against a champagne glass.

“Pray silence for the best man”

This was it. You can do it, Sherlock. You watched Sherlock rise from his seat and stiffly fasten one of the buttons on his blazer. He looked unbelievably uncomfortable. You smiled when you noticed Sherlock adjusting the flower you placed in his blazer pocket. The wedding guests applauded and waited for Sherlock to begin.

“Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends ... and ... erm ... others.” Sherlock blinked several times.

“Er ... w...” Another awkward pause. “…Also”

You looked over at John then at Molly and Greg. They wore the same concerned look on their faces.

“Telegrams” John whispered to Sherlock

“Right, uhm…” Sherlock patted the pockets of his blazer and pants then finally noticed them on the table near his place setting. “First things first. Telegrams.” He lifted up the pile and inspected the first one. “Well, they’re not actually telegrams. We just call them telegrams. I don’t know why. Wedding tradition,” Sherlock muttered quickly. “Because we don’t have enough of that already, apparently.”

You saw John narrow his eyes and turn to Mary. You nervously looked down at your hands in your lap. Sherlock read the first note.

“To Mr. and Mrs. Watson. So sorry I’m unable to be with you on your special day. Good luck and best wishes, Mike Stamford.”

“Oh, Mike,” John said, smiling.

“To John and Mary. All good wishes for your special day. With love and many big ...” Sherlock paused and suddenly looked like he had swallowed a lemon. “... big squishy cuddles, from Stella and Ted.” He looked up at the ceiling, blinking repeatedly again. You tried to suppress your laughter. “Mary – lots of love, ...” Yet another pause. “…Poppet” He finished, popping the “t” at the end. Mary snickered.

Sherlock straightened his back and took the next card. “Don’t bugger it up, Sher—” he abruptly cleared his throat and looked straight at you. You tried to hide your laughter. He’d finally gotten to the note you slipped in with the telegrams. Everyone would have heard it was actually quite a nice note if Sherlock had read the entire thing out loud. It read: Don’t bugger it up, Sherlock. Only kidding. You’re doing great. X, y/n.

“Um, special day” Sherlock threw a telegram over his shoulder. “Very special day” He then proceeded to toss each telegram straight behind him. “Love, love, love, love. Bit of a theme – you get the general gist. People are basically fond.” The wedding guests laughed, interpreting it as a joke. Sherlock looked confused, then picked up the other stack of index cards. He began to shuffle through them, clearly trying to find his place.

“Done that. ... Done that ... Done that bit ... Done that bit ... Done that bit ... Hmm ...”

You anxiously looked up at him, feeling the awkward tension in the room.

“I’m afraid, John, I can’t congratulate you.”

Your eyes snapped over to John who looked as shocked as you felt.

“All emotions, and in particular love, stand opposed to the pure, cold reason I hold above all things. A wedding is, in my considered opinion, nothing short of a celebration of all that is false and specious and irrational and sentimental in this ailing and morally compromised world.”

You looked around the room at all the wedding guests as some of them began to murmur. Greg and Molly had the same horrified look on their faces. Sherlock continued on.

“Today we honor the death-watch beetle that is the doom of our society and, in time – one feels certain – our entire species.”

You placed your head in your hands. You knew you should have made Sherlock let you read over his speech. You hadn’t wanted to make him feel nervous or like you didn’t trust him.

“But anyway ... let’s talk about John.”

“Yeah, good idea” you hissed up at Sherlock. He ignored you.

“If I burden myself with a little help-mate during my adventures, it is not out of sentiment or caprice – it is that he has many fine qualities of his own that he has overlooked in his obsession with me.”

You heard Greg snort across the room. This was going south fast. You couldn’t believe Sherlock was insulting John on his wedding day. He must be spiraling. There had to be something you could do to save this. Fake an emergency, maybe? You could at least buy some time that way.

“Indeed, any reputation I have for mental acuity and sharpness comes, in truth, from the extraordinary contrast John so selflessly provides. It is a fact, I believe, that brides tend to favor exceptionally plain bridesmaids for their big day. There is a certain analogy there, I feel.”

Ouch. You tried so hard not to look at Sherlock as you felt your ears burning with embarrassment. You adverted your gaze and focused on not allowing yourself to be hurt by what he’d just said.

Somehow, Sherlock continued. “And contrast is, after all, God’s own plan to enhance the beauty of his creation ... or it would be if God were not a ludicrous fantasy designed to provide a career opportunity for the family idiot.”

Oh boy. Now Sherlock was going straight to insulting the vicar. The murmuring began to pick up again. You looked over at John, who was now hiding his face in his hands while Mary frowned.

“The point I’m trying to make is that I am the most unpleasant, rude, ignorant and all-around obnoxious arsehole that anyone could possibly have the misfortune to meet.”

You looked up at Sherlock in genuine surprise.

“I am dismissive of the virtuous ...” He looked to the vicar. “... unaware of the beautiful ...” Your heart stopped when he looked straight at you. Or maybe in your general direction? You looked over your shoulder at Janine, who was smiling. He could have just as easily been looking at her.

Sherlock finally turned to John and Mary “... and uncomprehending in the face of the happy. So if I didn’t understand I was being asked to be best man, it is because I never expected to be anybody’s best friend. Certainly not the best friend of the bravest and kindest and wisest human being I have ever had the good fortune of knowing.”

Just when you’d started to doubt him, Sherlock had surpassed all your expectations. He always managed to surprise you, every time.

“John, I am a ridiculous man ... redeemed only by the warmth and constancy of your friendship. But, as I’m apparently your best friend, I cannot congratulate you on your choice of companion. Actually, now I can.” Sherlock turned to Mary. “Mary, when I say you deserve this man, it is the highest compliment of which I am capable. John, you have endured war, and injury, and tragic loss... so sorry again about that last one.” John laughed. Sherlock leaned back over to you and winked. You smiled and rolled your eyes.

“So know this: today you sit between the woman you have made your wife and the man you have saved. And I know I speak for Mary as well when I say we will never let you down, and we have a lifetime ahead to prove that.”

You found yourself fighting tears. You were not alone. “What’s wrong? What happened? Why are you all doing that? John?” Sherlock again looked rather confused. He turned to look at you. “Did I do it wrong?”

“Oh, Sherlock,” you said quietly.

John stood up and pulled Sherlock into a hug. The crowd applauded. “I haven’t finished yet,” Sherlock said as John released him.

“Yes, I know,” said John

“So, on to some funny stories ...” Sherlock attempted to yell over the applause.

“Can you – can you wait ’til I sit down?” John asked.

“So, on to some funny stories about John,” Sherlock continued as the noise died down. “So, for funny stories, one has to look no further than John’s blog.” Sherlock pulled out his phone. “The record of our time together. We’ve tackled some strange cases, some frustrating cases, and ‘touching’ cases. But we want something ... very particular for this special day, don’t we? The Bloody Guardsman.”

You remembered this case. It was only a few weeks ago,

You, John, Mary, and Sherlock sat in the living room of Sherlock’s flat, completely surrounded by lists, items, and menus for the wedding. You’d initially been surprised at Sherlock’s dedication to wedding planning. The back wall above the couch was a perfectly organized record of everything that needed to be done in the next few weeks down to all the potential fonts for the place cards. Sherlock had even created a to-scale model of the reception venue sometime during his fits of mania. You were no psychologist, but if you were you’d say that Sherlock’s meticulous efforts were all in an attempt to force some control into a daunting situation.

John and Mary were seated at the table near the windows looking over the bridesmaids’ dress options. Sherlock stood studying the guest list on the monstrous wall of wedding planning. You were sitting in John’s chair with your legs hanging over one of the arms, flipping through catering menus.

“Need to work on your half of the church, Mary. Looking a bit thin.” Sherlock spoke from across the room.

Mary forced a smile. “Ah, orphan’s lot. Friends – that’s all I have. Lots of friends.”

You didn’t know anything about Mary’s family except that for unknown reasons, she didn’t have one. She kept her cards so close to the vest, you doubted John knew anything either. “And your friends adore you, Mary,” you said, attempting to cheer her up.

“Schedule the organ music to begin at precisely 11:48,” Sherlock spoke over you. “Sherlock,” you groaned. He didn’t turn around from the wall and continued to fiddle with the clippings.

“Or maybe 11:55, with allowed time for delays,”

“Sherlock,” you tried again. “The rehearsal’s not for another two weeks. Just calm down”

He whipped around to face you. “Calm? I am calm. I’m extremely calm.”

“Yes, I can see that,” you said sarcastically, noting the wild look in his eyes.

“Let’s get back to the reception, come on,” Mary said from across the room, diffusing the tension. “John’s cousin. Top table?”

Sherlock rose to join John and Mary at the table. “Hmm. Hates you. Can’t even bear to think about you.”

You rolled your eyes. You tossed the catering menus to the side and walked over to the table to look over Mary’s shoulder.

“Seriously?” Mary asked, shocked

“Second class post, cheap card bought at a petrol station. Look at the stamp: three attempts at licking. She’s obviously unconsciously retaining saliva.”

“Don’t worry Mary, I’ve met her and she’s the worst. Let’s stick her by the bogs,” you interjected.

“Oh yes,” Mary agreed.

“Pretending I didn’t hear that,” John said, looking down at his phone.

“Who else hates me?” Mary asked Sherlock. He turned around and handed her a handwritten list. “Oh great – thanks,” Mary said unenthusiastically.

“Priceless painting nicked. Looks interesting,” John announced. He’d been looking through inquiries for cases on the blog. It was only a little annoying that he wasn’t helping. “How about this: ‘My husband is three people’? It’s interesting. Says he has three distinct patterns of moles on his skin.”

“Identical triplets – one in half a million births. Solved it without leaving the flat. Now, serviettes.” Sherlock bent down and pulled a tray out from under the coffee table that had two different elaborately folded napkins. “Swan or Sydney Opera House?”

“Wow…” you said flatly. He’s lost it. You bit your lip in concern and crossed your arms over your chest.

“Where’d you learn to do that?!” Mary asked, impressed.

“Many unexpected skills required in the field of criminal investigation ...”

“You’re lying, Sherlock,” you said, teasing.

“I once broke an alibi by demonstrating the exact severity of ...”

“Sherlock, out with it.” You pressed him further.

“Okay – I learned it on YouTube.”

“Well then, Sydney Opera House, please,” Mary said with a smile.

You turned away, thinking. “Hey, Mary? Can I show you what I was thinking for my bridesmaid dress?”

“Uh, sure,” She replied.

“Great!” you said and grabbed her wrist. You pulled her into the kitchen and closed the door. “Mary, we have to do the thing. Right now.”

“Are you sure, he seems okay-ish?” She said skeptically.

“Okay-ish?! Mary, he’s watching YouTube videos on napkin folding. He’s terrified.”

“Right. You’re right. Okay, you speak with Sherlock while I get John.”

You opened the doors to the living room to see Sherlock sitting on the floor, surrounded by at least 15 napkins folded in the opera house shape.

“That just sort of ... happened,” he said dropping his hands to his side.

“Did you just do that now?” John asked, finally looking up from his phone.

“Okay. John?” Mary started. “I’m about to give Beth a call, she’ll want to talk to you as well.” Mary held her phone up and gestured to the kitchen.

“Oh Beth, that’s right. We’ve been meaning to call her.” John got up and followed her.

You walked over to Sherlock and took a seat on the floor next to him. He reached under the table for more napkins, but you caught his hand and shook your head.

“I think we have enough for now. I actually need to talk to you about something, Sherlock. I’m worried about John.” He looked over at you, listening intently. You lowered your voice and inched closer. “I think all the wedding planning is getting to him. He needs to get out for a bit, I can tell.” Sherlock nodded along with you. “I can’t say anything because he won’t listen to me. He’s just going to think I’m worrying too much. Could you please find him a case, any case? For me?”  

“Yes, yes, of course. You can count on me.” Sherlock whispered. He stood up and carefully smoothed out his suit. John walked back into the room. You got up and silently joined Mary into the kitchen. A few moments later, Sherlock and John walked into the kitchen.

“Er, we’re just going to ... I need, um, Sherlock to help me choose some, er, socks.” John awkwardly fumbled over his words.

“Ties,” Sherlock interjected.

“Let’s go with socks,” Mary said.

“Could be a while,” John said. “We’ve got to make sure they match my—”

“Tie” Sherlock interrupted. John looked back at him, exasperated.

“My coat in there?” John cleared his throat. Mary nodded and John turned the corner. Sherlock leaned in and lowered his voice.

“Just going to take him out for a bit – run him.”

“Good work, Sherlock,” you said with a smile. Sherlock winked at you and walked out of the door. When they were out of sight, you turned to Mary.

“Do you fancy a drink?”

“Let’s go,” She replied.

That had been the end of your involvement in the case of the Bloody Guardsman. You had heard the rest of the story from John. Sherlock hadn’t particularly felt like sharing. Probably because he never solved it. You listened to Sherlock lay out his chosen details in his speech all the way up to Sherlock and John finding Stephen Bainbridge bleeding out in a shower in the barracks.

“Private Bainbridge had just come off guard duty. He’d stood there for hours, plenty of people watching, nothing apparently wrong. He came off duty and within minutes was nearly dead from a wound in his stomach, but there was no weapon. Where did it go? Ladies and gentlemen, I invite you to consider this: a murderer who can walk through walls, a weapon that can vanish – but in all of this, there is only one element which can be said to be truly remarkable. Would anyone like to make a guess?”

You rolled your eyes. Of course, Sherlock was challenging people to solve a case on the spot that he didn’t even figure out himself. You pitied whoever he chose to humiliate.

“Scotland Yard.” Greg looked up from his drink. “Have you got a theory?” Greg stared blankly at Sherlock. “Yeah, you. You’re a detective – broadly speaking. Got a theory?”

This was going to be bad.

“Er, um, if the, uh, if the if-if-if, if the blade was, er, propelled through the, um ... grating in the air vent ... maybe a-a ballista or a – or a – or a catapult. Erm, somebody tiny could … could crawl in there.” Molly cringed. “So, yeah, we’re loo... we’re looking for a-a-a-a dwarf.”

“Brilliant,” said Sherlock

“Really?” Greg replied immediately

“No,” Sherlock said coldly. Ruthless. Greg lowered his head back into his drink. Across the room, you saw Tom whispering something into Molly’s ear.

“Hello? Who was that?” Sherlock asked and looked around the room before settling on Tom. “Tom. Got a theory?” Tom slowly stood up across the room.

Poor Tom looked uneasy. He shifted around for a bit before reluctantly giving his opinion. “Um ... attempted suicide, with a blade made of compacted blood and bone that broke after piercing his abdomen ... like a meat ... dagger.”

Molly wore a look of uncomprehending embarrassment. You looked to Sherlock. He had a look on his face that was a strange mix of smugness and disbelief. “A meat dagger.” He stated.

“Yes,” Tom said, awkwardly.

“Sit down.” Molly hissed. She reached up and yanked Tom down to his seat by his sleeve.

“No,” said Sherlock plainly. “There was one feature, and only one feature, of interest in the whole of this baffling case, and quite frankly it was the usual. John Watson: who, while I was trying to solve the murder, instead saved a life.”

You smiled at John’s proud expression. So that was the point of Sherlock’s roundabout story. It surprised you because when they’d initially came home that day, all Sherlock could focus on was how the attempted murderer did it and why he couldn’t figure it out. It was nice to see he had developed a new perspective.

“The case itself remains the most ingenious and brilliantly-planned murder – or attempted murder – I’ve ever had the pleasure to encounter; the most perfect locked-room mystery of which I am aware. However, I’m not just here to praise John – I’m also here to embarrass him, so let’s move on to some ...”

“No-no, wait, so how was it ... how was it done?” Lestrade interrupted.

Now Sherlock would have to admit he didn’t solve the case. You smirked. That’s what you get for insisting on embarrassing Greg and Tom.  

“How was what done?” Sherlock asked, attempting to deflect

“The stabbing,” Lestrade clarified.

Sherlock looked down for a moment, then reluctantly continued. “I’m afraid I don’t know. I didn’t solve that one. That’s ... It can happen sometimes. It’s very ... very disappointing.” He looked down for a moment as if contemplating then continued. “Embarrassment leads me on to the stag night.”

A/N: So sorry this is so late! I haven’t forgotten about this series, I promise! I just moved into a new apartment in college and it’s already been nuts!

taglist: @the-chaotic-cow @amoeebaa @sad-bitch-h0ur @scorpios-echos

If you want to be added to the taglist for future updates, go like the post I made earlier about it!

[clonecumber]

So in Imperial Commando, Niner says that he hasn't spoken to Fi in nearly two years, and that bothered me a little. (Well, more than a little.) I just find it a little strange that we know that Skirata personally takes the time to check up on the hundred or so commandos he trained, yet he can't find time to arrange anything between Fi and Omega and make sure that Omega gets to check up on Fi. It also makes me wonder whether Omega ever asked to communicate with Fi directly (even just to record a message for him or something,) because it seems like they would so *what happened and why didn't they.* Basically I'm wondering how to square Omega being so tight-knit and caring about each other with the fact that they don't actually interact with Fi for almost two years once he's on Mandalore, and I find it difficult to believe that at no point during those two years did they have even 5 minutes to talk to him. My instinct here is to ask why Skirata might find it beneficial to keep Fi and Omega apart, and I can't tell if I'm unfairly on an anti-Skirata kick here, but maybe he sees their separation as something that will help establish Kyrimorut via Omega's dependence on him as the "keeper" of Fi? (I know this is very rambly and I apologize but I want your thoughts here!)

Hi! Again, you don't have to apologize for rambling. I'm not exactly free of sin myself here, and I don't mind, anyway.

So I was thinking about this, and I checked, and you're right that in IC Niner and Darman both comment that they haven't seen Fi in a couple years. Darman even goes one further and acts relieved that he's able to talk to Fi now, which sort of implies he wasn’t able to before:

Which surprised me a bit, because I remembered this part in Order 66 (that I had to go back and find to make sure I wasn’t imagining things), where Darman mentions that Fi left them messages sometimes:

Granted, leaving messages isn’t really the same thing as being able to talk. It’s still something. It’s less clear if they’re able to respond, but them receiving texts from a dead man apparently isn’t a security issue, so I feel like they must have a secure enough method of communication that they might be able to reply too, at least sometimes.

And I mean, at the very least, they should have been able to use Jusik as a messenger, since he’s noted to have been updating Omega on Fi’s condition this whole time, and they are able to talk to him.

It’s likely KT just forgot, and she sort of went off the rails with characterization continuity in IC anyway, but I agree with you that it’s strange if she shifted to the idea that Omega never got to talk to Fi. I mean, canonically it didn’t happen. They did have some form of communication as per the above. But it would be very strange.

But since it didn’t, and in order to square it with Darman and Niner’s comments in IC, I’d bet that communication coming from Fi has been exceptionally sparse and thin on substantial topics, and doesn’t feel emotionally satisfying. They’ve gotten updates, but they haven’t talked. If you only saw someone you love for barely ten minutes over a year ago and barely exchanged hellos, will you count that as “seeing” them within the last two years, or will you count the time instead based on the last time you saw them where you were also able to spend quality time with them? (Holy cow, that sentence.)

That’s the best explanation I could come up with, anyway.

As for the rest, I agree that it doesn’t really fit with Kal’s MO, either, except in the way that Kal tends to forget about people having relationships that don’t involve him. I don’t feel like he’d deliberately cut Fi off, not even in that way he does where he tells himself he has a good reason for it. He’s too proud of Omega as a concept. Rather, I think it’s more likely this is similar to the way he doesn’t ever really think about the Nulls talking to and missing each other in a way that doesn't involve him, so he probably just doesn’t even think about whether Omega are talking to each other or not. Not even in the vein of wondering how Fi’s doing. Not deliberately malicious, but just a consequence of his own self-centeredness. Being fair to him, though, while he is someone Fi respects and looks up to, and while his advice would carry a lot of weight with Fi, Skirata’s not actually responsible for Fi’s recovery. He’s not a medical professional, and unlike Parja he hasn’t tried to insert himself as a medical authority in Fi’s life regardless. If he’s keeping his nose out of it unless specifically requested, that’s not wrong of him (though a check-in probably wouldn’t really be amiss, I’m pretty sure it just literally has not occurred to him).

So I wouldn’t really place the blame for this at his feet. If I were to try to come up with an in-universe rationale for this, I’d probably say that it looks a lot like Fi’s self-isolating.

Whoever is helping him with his recovery should be encouraging him to reach out to people who care about him, but either they’re not, which isn’t great, or they are but Fi’s dodging the issue, which isn’t exactly something they can help. Lead a horse to water and all that, and they can’t make Fi utilize his support network. Unfortunately, I do think it’s very likely Fi would dodge communicating with Omega every chance he gets. He likes to pretend things that upset him aren’t happening, and with his own struggles with his self-worth, I can see him neglecting to communicate with his squad. It might make things too real for him, it might make him wonder why he’s “wasting their time”, and he might even be resentful of them sometimes. The rest of Omega isn’t in a situation to apply force to the situation either, not until Atin makes it to Mandalore (after which, we rarely see Fi anywhere without him, so).

This was interesting to think about. Let me know your thoughts?

[mentally-in-northern-italy]

The Best Potioneer (pt. 1) — Harry Potter x reader

***not my gif***

Request: “Hii, I love your work! I was wondering if I could request a Harry x Slytherin!reader, maybe set during the last year at Hogwarts and enemies to lovers? Thank you 💚”

Summary: You despise Harry. Your Slytherin friends seem to have strong opinions of him already, but during your sixth year, you also seem to have found a reason to absolutely hate the boy. But when you’re forced to work on an assignment together and stay up all night, is it possible for those feelings to change?

Word Count: 2.6K

A/N: Thank you so much for the request @obsessedwithrandomthings ! Ahhh, I really hope I did it justice!! I’m sorry I had to split it up into two parts because it turned out *way* longer than I expected it to! It was so hard to come up with a valid reason to hate Harry, he’s such a sweetheart, but I tried my best lmao. Anyways, I had such a fun time writing this and I really hope you enjoy!! And stay tuned for part 2!

__________________

You crossed your legs as you nodded politely in agreement with something that Professor Slughorn had said. In all honesty, you had had no idea what he was rambling on about, no one did, really, but still your face held a bright smile as you nodded once again. Your head of house, Professor Slughorn had invited you, among with various others, to his newly formed club.

Your eyes briefly surveyed the others that were sat at the table with you, all listening -- or at least, pretending to listen -- to the Professor about some very rare ingredient that he skillfully was able to find in some remote region. To your right sat Blaise Zabini, a fellow Slytherin, and to your left, a Hufflepuff that you had never talked to before.

All of them were here for one reason, of course; they seemed to show that they were extraordinarily skilled at something. Or, they were related to someone who was. You hoped it was the former in your case.

You liked to believe that you were here not because of your extremely famous Potioneer father but because of the talent you, yourself, possessed when it came to Potions.

Potions had always been your favourite. You liked other things, of course, but none of them satisfied you like Potions did. The feeling of accomplishment as you gaze down at a finished recipe in your cauldron bubbling, to you, was exhilarating, and you couldn’t seem to get enough of it.

Evidently, this was also the case for your father, who after graduating Hogwarts, had gone on to become a Potioneer, brilliant in his field, and make a name for himself. You hoped that you would be able to do the same.

“But enough of me blabbering on,” Slughorn chuckled heartily, “I’m sure you’ll have plenty of opportunities to hear me talk about myself.”

You met his gaze and smiled politely, making sure that he knows you’re paying attention.

See, Snape had always been fond of you. Snape, as the Potions Professor, gave you brilliant marks (which you deserved, in all fairness) and didn’t even try to hide the fact that you were his favourite. While others got a cold and disapproving glare from him when they had made a mistake, you received helpful insight on where you went wrong. Snape gave others a monotone sentence of approval at their success, while he gave you… Well, he gave you the same thing, really, but you could tell it was more heartfelt. As heartfelt as it gets, coming from Snape and all.

You were determined to impress Slughorn as well. You had decided that sheer talent can only go so far; teachers were human, too, after all. It was with no doubt that you concluded that every teacher ought to have a favourite, someone they will always favour over the next. And, similarly, every teacher has one student they would never think twice about, someone they didn’t even notice. While you were certainly grateful that you weren’t the latter, you weren’t exactly pleased at your position in the middle. It had always been all or nothing for you. You wanted to be the favourite. The best there can be.

But, that was proving to be a little difficult and unexpectedly, it was because of a certain raven-haired, bespectacled, and utterly clueless -- in your humble opinion -- Gryffindor boy.

You had never paid much attention to Harry. He had always been insignificant in your life, having only shared a couple classes with him over the years. And, even in those classes, you had only exchanged a few occasional words. The bottom line was, you didn’t hate Harry and you didn’t like him. He was just… Harry. A Gryffindor.

It was almost as if the universe saw this and decided that this wasn’t enough. Just like you disliked your mediocre position in Slughorn’s class, the universe disliked Harry’s mediocre presence in your life. After all, you were always one to go big or to go home.

It was as if Harry had been pushed onto the stage that was your life, forced to play a role, as soon as your sixth-year Potions classes had begun. And, Harry might be a hero to some, but in your play, he was easily the opposite.

All because Harry had started doing exceptionally well in Potions. You didn’t know what it was. His potions always turned out perfect, capturing Slughorn’s praise. Praise that you wish you were receiving. Naturally, before you knew it, it turned into a competition, both determined to out-shine the other. You couldn’t let him beat you.

A recent occurrence annoyed you, in particular, just a few weeks ago, when Harry was able to brew a draught of Living Death perfectly, and in record time. You were close, of course, but Harry had managed to do it before you, resulting in him getting awarded with a vial of Felix Felicis and getting praised relentlessly by Slughorn. Harry, being aware of just how much you resented him doing better than you in Potions, sent you a small smile as he stood at the front of the class, holding up the vial of the luck potion. It was clear at this moment that you had to be better than Harry. There was no other option. Excelling at Potions was in your blood.

However, the sole reason behind your undying hatred for the boy was not just the fact that he had magically turned into a brilliant Potioneer. No, it was also because of your friends, who were mainly Slytherins, had told you all about their interactions with him over the years when you brought up how he seemed to have claimed your spot at the top of the class. Since you only got a one-sided testimony from your friends, you were always led to believe that Harry was in the wrong.

If Harry were being honest, he wasn’t exactly sure why you hated him and wanted to beat him so badly in Potions. Regardless of the reason, Harry certainly wasn’t one to back out from some (un?)healthy competition. A part of him only seemed to want to compete with you on principle; a typical Slytherin vs. Gryffindor feud. He certainly didn’t take this little competition as seriously as you did.

But this ‘competition’ for you meant a lot more.

“Ah, Ms. [Y/L/N],” Slughorn directly acknowledged you for the first time that evening, “how lovely it is to have you here!”

“It’s a pleasure to be here, sir,” you replied kindly.

“Tell me, how is your father doing?” Slughorn questioned with genuine curiosity, “I haven’t heard from him in ages! Correct me if I’m wrong, Ms. [Y/L/N], last I heard, he was running some sort of experiment trial with sleeping potions?”

Your heart sank. You couldn’t help but think you were only here because of your father. You despised the thought. You caught your smile from faltering and took a breath in.

“He’s doing well, Professor,” you nodded, “And yes, he is running an experiment with sleeping potions. Unfortunately, he hasn’t shared much about it with me just yet.”

“Oh, yes, yes,” Slughorn said to you, “He was always quite the expert at sleeping potions…”

He paused at this before smiling and turning his gaze from you to Harry, sat directly across from you, “But of course, we have another emerging sleep potion expert in the room!”

At this, you grudgingly turned your head to Harry as well.

Great. Just the thing you needed this evening; to be reminded of your failure to brew a sleeping potion, one that your father would easily be able to brew in his sleep.

You continued to try to smile politely as Slughorn once again, started to praise Harry for his perfect potion. Harry smiled and accepted the compliments quietly, but he shot you a few glances in between, which only made you angrier.

“Quite remarkable, indeed,” Slughorn praised, “Wouldn’t you agree, Ms. [Y/L/N]?”

“Yes,” you agreed, still smiling, although you knew that everyone could tell it wasn’t genuine, “It is quite interesting how much Harry has been able to improve this year.”

“Indeed, indeed,” came Slughorn’s response who nodded and smiled at Harry.

“In my opinion, it just seems too good to be true,” you continued, your smile turning more into a grimace, as you shifted a little in your seat, “how exactly did you manage to brew a potion like the draught of Living Death so brilliantly, even though you could barely manage to brew a draught of Peace just last year, Harry?” You tried to keep your tone curious and casual, but you failed as a few murmurs broke out amongst the table, clearly picking up on the tension in the air.

“Well,” Harry began, holding your gaze keenly and smiling slightly, “I just followed the recipe.”

“Of course,” you said as you nodded slightly, patronizing him, “but was crushing the sopophorous bean in the recipe?”

“I--” Harry tried to reply as he, too, shifted in his seat. His smile had vanished.

“And,” you continued as you rested your elbows on the table, “Is ‘following the recipe’ a newly acquired skill?”

“No,” Harry kept his calm as you struggled to do the same.

“Because, if I recall, you couldn’t simply ‘follow the recipe’ last year,” you accused and narrowed your eyes. You had stopped pretending to be polite. More whispers and murmurs broke out while Slughorn watched this scene unfold in distress, “Or the year before that, or--”

“Are you trying to imply that I cheated, [Y/L/N]?”

“How lovely of you to finally catch on, Potter.”

Slughorn seemed to have decided that he had seen enough. “Alright! That’s enough, Mr. Potter and Ms. [Y/L/N]! Everyone, help yourself to this delicious chocolate cake! This ought to calm some of you down a notch...“

You and Harry kept your gazes on each other, both unwilling to break first as several people around you finally started to talk again, instead of listening intently to the heated interaction between you two.

Finally, Harry was first to break, looking away from you and picking up his cutlery.

__________________________

If it wasn’t already clear to you that this year just was not your year, it became clear when Slughorn declared that your class would be working with partners on the next assignment.

It became crystal clear, however, when you got partnered up with none other than Harry Potter.

You groaned as you walked back to your assigned seat beside Harry after arguing -- respectfully, of course, -- with Slughorn for fifteen minutes straight on just how well you could do on this assignment by yourself. It would be an understatement to say that you were severely displeased when Slughorn repeatedly suggested this was a two-person job.

You took a seat beside him with a frown set on your face, as Harry glanced at you from the corner of his eye. He was dreading this as well, of course, but certainly not as much as you seem to be dreading this. Was it because you hated that he was a Gryffindor? Perhaps you thought he was lesser-than because he was a half-blood? Or because he hung out with the Weasleys and Granger, both considered to be near the bottom of the wizarding social status hierarchy? He decided that it most likely was a combination of all of these, judging from the green and silver on your robes.

The truth was though, you couldn’t care less about what house he was in. Or, who his friends were. And, you certainly didn’t give a damn about his status. You resented him because he was doing better in Potions than you were, but you hated him because that was just the norm. You were expected to hate him. Only now, you actually had a reason to.

But now, because he was paired up with you, his failure was your failure. His success was your success. You couldn’t one-up him this time… you would have to actually cooperate with him. Interact with him. You scrunched up your face at the thought.

“Memory potions!” Slughorn clapped his hands as he started to tell the class about their upcoming assignment, “Who can recall what those are?” He chuckled slightly at his own joke.

Hermione Granger’s hand shot up.

“They’re exactly that, sir,” she informed, “They can boost one’s memory for up to six hours, depending on the dosage.”

“Yes!” Slughorn seemed pleased at the answer, “Yes, Ms. Granger! Memory potions are very powerful, indeed… I had a particularly nasty experience with those once…” He trailed off into telling his very underwhelming anecdote that no one really cared much for.

“Oh no,” you whispered, not particularly to anyone, as you realized it’s going to take Slughorn a while to actually get to the point.

“We’ll be here a while,” Harry whispered back, which surprised you. It was a very rare occurrence for you two to whisper to each other, and even more unusual for you two to be agreeing.

“But never mind that!” Slughorn said finally, “You lot will be brewing memory potions!”

Almost instantly, you grabbed a hold of your Advanced Potions book to examine the recipe. A few others did the same and Slughorn visibly noticed.

“Ah,” he said, “You won’t find the recipe in there. You will have to find the recipe yourselves.” He smiled. “After finding the precise list of ingredients and measurements, I would like you, with your partners, to brew the potion.”

You furrowed your eyebrows in concentration. Find the recipe?

“This assignment is, of course,” Slughorn went on, “a competition. The first pair of students to successfully brew a memory potion with effects lasting for precisely 7 hours will receive an O on the next essay!” He smiled as his eyes moved around the room. “You have until next week, but this potion can be done in a day...” His smile grew, waiting for a reaction from the group.

The students in the room all had no idea how to proceed. Find the recipe? 7 hours? This assignment seemed like way too much work, all for an O on the next essay?

“Alright! Get to work, you lot,” Slughorn urged as he laughed and walked back to his desk, failing to elaborate.

You looked around the room to find that everyone had started to talk to their partners, trying to figure out how they would be going about this peculiar task.

“We need to stay up all night,” you said quickly, turning your head to face Harry.

“What? Why?” he questioned with confusion in his eyes, “We have a week!”

“Zabini and Greengrass will most definitely stay up all night,” you told him urgently, “I know it. We need to beat them.”

“But--” Harry tried to reason with you. Spending all night working on potion with you? He wasn’t exactly looking forward to it.

“Look, do you know where we might be able to do this?” you ignored what he said previously, turning to get a fresh piece of parchment, “I was thinking of an abandoned classroom, but Filch will easily catch us.”

Harry did know a place. But did he really want to work on a potion all night? With you, no less?

“Fine,” you sighed as you once again turned to face him, “You need to sneak me into your common room then.”

“What? No!” he exclaimed, alarmed. He was not about to do that. For all he knew, this was all just some clever ploy to get back at the Gryffindors for beating the Slytherins in the Quidditch match last week.

“Where else would we go?” you question irritably.

“What about your common room?”

“No. I already told you Zabini and Greengrass will probably use it to brew their potion tonight.”

“But, I can’t sneak you in.”

“You have to!”

Harry was conflicted. He couldn’t sneak you into his common room, and he didn’t even want to think about what would happen if he were caught in your common room.

“Fine, okay,” Harry said as he fixed the glasses on his face, thinking, “I might know a place.”

“Okay?” you said, getting incredibly frustrated at his cryptic response, “Please enlighten me, oh Chosen One.”

“Just meet me on the seventh floor tonight.” He ignored your clever response and gave you a straightforward one. Like he always did.

“But there--” you tried to protest. The seventh floor had no classrooms that you could use.

“Just--” Harry also seemed to be getting frustrated as he insisted, “Just do it. Alright?”

“Fine,” you crossed your arms and leaned back into your seat.

You expected the night to go horribly. You expected a dreadful night, filled with insults. You expected your hatred for Harry to only have increased in the morning. What you didn’t expect was what actually happened.

(Part 2 has been posted!)

[fireinmywoods]

Can you explain trauma Kirk has in the cheating scene? Im new to star trek

Welcome!!! I hope you stick around for a while and become fully assimilated into the strange, delightful glory that is Trek fandom.

I can only speak for myself, but when I talk about Jim’s trauma, I’m referring to two main components (under the read-more for discussion of childhood abuse and Tarsus):

1. Jim’s abusive childhood

There’s a deleted scene from Jim’s childhood in the first movie in which his older brother Sam is shown running away from home. It‘s made clear that the “man of the house” Frank is at the very least verbally and emotionally abusive to both kids, and based on baby Jimmy’s reaction to Frank getting in his face, I don’t think it’s a stretch to imagine that it had or would later escalate to physical violence.

[Note: Because AOS and especially the extended universe are a hot mess, some pseudo-canon sources describe Frank as their uncle (Winona’s brother) while others have him as their stepfather. I’ve gone with stepfather, because I think it better explains why they stayed in that situation as long as they did.]

Sam says their mom doesn’t understand how Frank treats them when she’s not around (i.e., off-planet with Starfleet), which makes the case for a certain amount of neglect as well. Then there’s the AOS tie-in comic Operation: Annihilate, which shows the aftermath of the car incident, and in which Winona is pretty grossly depicted as an enabler of Frank’s abuse, telling Jimmy that Frank just gets mad sometimes and that he basically needs to suck it up and live with it. For the record, this comic is not part of my personal canon, as I think the exchange I’m describing is lazily characterized and does Winona unnecessarily dirty. (“He’s given us a home” - motherfucker, it’s a post-scarcity economy and you work for Starfleet! Get a goddamn apartment!) That said, I do think Winona bears significant responsibility for leaving her kids in that situation, since the most charitable read is that she wasn’t paying enough attention to realize how Frank was treating them. (I know at least one of my fandom friends disagrees on this point, and I’ll acknowledge that I have a dirty lens when it comes to childhood abuse and the enabling thereof. Your mileage may vary.)

Anyway. In this version of events, Jimmy doesn’t steal the car because he’s some innately shitheaded out-of-control rebel like the final cut suggests. In fact, Sam’s exposition tells us that up until this point Jimmy has been an exceptionally obedient, rule-following, “good” child. Here, he steals the car because Sam leaving and his own realization that he’s never going to be good enough to make Frank happy makes something in him snap. It’s a powerful moment which greatly enhances Jim’s characterization, and if you ask me it’s frankly criminal that they deleted this scene.

2. Tarsus IV

TOS Kirk is a canonical survivor of a famine and genocidal massacre on the colony Tarsus IV. Here again canon is a bit of a mess when it comes to Tarsus IV, and fanon has taken that canon and gone absolutely hog wild with it, but it is firmly established that Jim was just 13 at the time, which...woof. That’s dark as hell.

Now, it is not official AOS canon that this version of Jim was on Tarsus IV at the time of the massacre, but it’s also not official that he wasn’t. My take, which I think is shared by many in fandom, is that AOS Jim was sent there to live with family after the car incident as a sort of “get your head straight” move, and also (in my opinion) because Winona finally started cluing in that it probably wasn’t a great idea to leave him alone with Frank.

The TOS extended universe further establishes that Jim was understandably pretty messed up after the events of Tarsus, and that his father’s intervention was crucial to helping him recover and setting him on the path toward Starfleet and the Enterprise. In AOS, of course, George isn’t around to provide that support, and Jim’s already learned that he can’t rely on his mom, and he’s maybe stuck living with fucking Frank again. All of this builds on his earlier trauma in really terrible ways, and he never has the opportunity to actually heal from any of it.

Aftermath: PTSD and the cheating scene

Again, the abuse and Tarsus IV are both semi-canonical at best. However, I’d argue that they should be considered canon, because Jim’s character arc makes a lot more sense when they’re included. This double whammy of unresolved trauma and the almost total absence of emotional support go a long way toward explaining how the boy who grows up to be TOS Kirk in one timeline instead grows into the Jim Kirk we meet at the bar in 2255 of the Kelvin timeline - a “repeat offender,” reckless, directionless, emotionally detached, quick to meet violence with violence, and so very, very angry.

That’s why the scene where Spock lays into Jim for cheating on the Kobayashi Maru is so painful to me. Jim is up on display at the front of this hall, being stared at by basically everyone he knows, and Spock is criticizing him for missing the point of the exercise - specifically, lecturing him about needing to experience fear and control his reaction to it. Imagine how that would land for someone with as much trauma as Jim is carrying, who endured all he did as a powerless child, and who (in my telling of things) suffers to this day from panic attacks as a result. It’s, uh...it’s not great.

[whatifxwereyou]

Firestorm Part 10: Obvious

Fandom: Mortal Kombat 2021 Liu Kang x Reader

A/N: new stuff soon, <3

Start From the Beginning << Previous Chapter Next Chapter >> Chapter Index

The trio moved the remaining few things you owned and then setup your new space. Then you setup a few lights in the hall so that it wouldn’t feel like such an unwelcoming space. You decided that you might try your hand at decorating if you wound up stuck there for longer than a few weeks. You were trying very hard to be positive. The next few days, while resting, you would clean up the adjacent rooms and washroom. That would help keep you busy and keep your mind off of the inevitable end that seemed to be creeping ever closer.

You sat on the floor, looking over a list of hospitals in Andong while pouring over maps. Together you charted places to stay while you were there and places of note. You couldn’t recall where your parents had lived but you remembered the hospital the moment that you’d seen the name. Keimyung University Dongsan Hospital.

The search for your truth, whatever that meant, would start there. You couldn’t prove you existed anymore. All of your important papers and identification had been lost in the fire. You were sure that the Chinese government had record of your existence but that wasn’t what you’d needed. You hadn’t minded losing all of that at first. You hadn’t thought about it that hard. You’d found a new purpose and a new identity in Raiden’s Temple with your friends. They’d become your found family.

But there were times, like now, where it made you sad. You’d worked hard for the life you’d built and there were times where you missed your remaining family. You’d never been close and the relationships had been incredibly toxic, but you also still loved them. It would have been so much easier to track this stuff down if you could stop by your sister’s and ask your father. You were estranged but he would have still given you the information. If it came down to that, Liu Kang had said he was willing to speak to them under the guise of a story on the town and the history of the dojo. That would have been awkward too, so you hoped it didn’t come to that.

“I’ll start moving my things over tomorrow. I’m sore.” Kung Lao yawned. He’d opted to take a room that was on the floor above yours.

“If you had just waited to move furniture like a normal person…” Liu Kang scolded, going over the maps again and charting out a course in the notebook he’d been using.

“Today has been exceptionally long. You don’t know that is the reason I’m sore.”

“He’s got a point.” You didn’t look up from the map. “Sure you won’t change your mind? You can just stay in your room. I’m really okay here by myself.” You didn’t want them to isolate themselves. They were important people in Raiden’s Temple. You were the only one causing problems so there was no reason for you all to be isolated.

“I’m not leaving you here alone.” Kung Lao pouted. “Do you not want me to stay?”

“It’s not that. I think it’s really sweet but you’re…” You wanted to say he was more important than you were but you knew both he and Liu would react poorly to that information. “I just think it’s silly for all of us to be isolated when I’m the only one impaling people with ink.”

“And what happens if you’re here alone and you summon something you can’t handle?” Kung Lao frowned. You couldn’t argue with him that there wasn’t a chance of that happening seeing as it had happened many, many times now. “You almost killed yourself today with your arcana.”

“I know that I just… I don’t…”

“Don’t argue with him, Y/N. It’s pointless.” Liu Kang was still writing in the notebook and you sighed. They were right. Arguing with them was pointless.

“I guess the only choice you have is to get better.” Kung Lao beamed and wrapped an arm around you in a hug. You winced and he relaxed his grip on you. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine. You mean well, I guess.” You threw another glance at Liu Kang and picked up his hand as he tapped the paper with the pen. He was covered in small scrapes. “You never took care of this.”

“I forgot.”

“Can I?” You could feel Kung Lao rolling his eyes. “What?”

“I would have left mine too if it meant you were going to take care of it.” Kung Lao let you go and hopped up to his feet. “I’m going to get some rest. I really am sore. But I’ll see you tomorrow, Y/N and we’ll get this placed cleaned up in no time.”

“Thanks, Kung Lao.” You felt your cheeks hot at the implication. Kung Lao narrowed his eyes at Liu Kang before he left the room. You could hear his footsteps echoing down the hall.

“…I didn’t leave it because of that.”

“Uh-huh.” You let go of his hand and he tried to hide his smile.

“I wasn’t willing to leave while you were unconscious. That’s all. Kung Lao was bloodier than I was. He needed stitches.”

“Yeah.” You looked down at the maps and felt the guilt rattle you again. “Can I help?”

“I’m fine, Y/N.”

“That didn’t answer my question.” You wanted to help. Even something as small as cleaning a few scrapes would make you feel a little better. Paying a penance for the things beyond your control would help ease your guilt, you hoped.

“Yeah, you can. If you’re that worriedabout me.” He looked to you purposely as he said the word.

“Oh, we’re playing that game, are we? Mr. I’ve-been-radiating worry-literally-all-day.”

“Feel like my worry is more justified than yours.” Liu folded up the map and placed it aside with the notebook and pen. You picked up the first aid kit that you’d shoved beneath your desk for the time being. Liu was setting his shirt aside and you averted your gaze quickly. Why? Well, habit, you supposed. Thankfully most of the scrapes were on his arms. There were a handful on his face and another on his neck. Why he’d taken his shirt off? You were now uncertain.

You would literally never complain that Liu Kang went around without his shirt. It was very distracting though. You picked up his hand and urged it to rest on your knee while you wiped away the blood, soot, and dirt that stained his skin. He didn’t even budge as you cleaned the small scrapes on his left arm. But he did watch you, which was also very distracting. Liu Kang had a way of taking you in and you shivered beneath his stare.

He pushed your hair back behind your ear and his hand engulfed your cheek and turned you to him. Warm Liu Kang and his careful touch. There were rivers behind his eyes of things he wanted to say but he said none of them. You leaned into his hand and then turned back to your work. He rested his other hand on his knee and waited patiently.

When you switched arms, he shifted and cleared his throat. You threw your gaze back to him and caught his dark eyes full of admiration before turning back to his wounds.

“How are you handling this?”

“Oh, I’m not.” You offered his hand a squeeze. “Turned my brain off. I have completely detached.”

“Y/N…” He was surprised and grabbed your hand to stop you, worry thick in his voice and his gaze. You offered him a smile and he sighed in frustration. “Sometimes your sense of humor worries me.”

“I know.” You held his hand. “I worry me too sometimes but I… joking about it helps me cope. Otherwise I’d just be scared. Laughing makes me feel less scared. I’m…” You shivered and his hand brushed over your arm. “I’m scared.” You hated saying it. Up until now you’d refused to admit it but the more that you thought about it the more hopeless it seemed.

“I’m scared too.” Liu’s hand crept over the hanfu you’d changed into for the night. Then he let you go and leaned against your bed. You scooted next to him. “I’m with Kung Lao on this one. I don’t think you should be alone here. I’ll be moving my things closer tomorrow.”

“Liu…” You knew that they wouldn’t listen. Why were you arguing? You wanted them to listen. “I know you guys are worried and that you feel guilty that I’m here alone but I volunteered for this. It was my idea. I know it’s dangerous but… not hurting anyone anymore also meant not hurting you.” You turned to face him and rested your hand on his cheek. He placed his hand over yours and then urged his lips to your palm, never taking his eyes away from yours. Your stomach tightened into knots. Why was it that when he looked at you, you felt naked? Like he could see you as vulnerable as you often felt? “Look at you.”

“I know you feel guilty.” He pulled your hand away from his lips and held it in his, thumb brushing over your knuckles, prayer beads between both your hands. “I can’t spare you from that as much as I wish to. But I made my choice. Kung Lao warned me what would happen if I did.”

“You just… jumped right through it to get to me.” You furrowed your brow as you felt the burning behind your eyes, hot with emotion. You hated crying. You hated it. Don’t do it. “You’re a fool sometimes, Liu Kang.”

“Call it what you will. I couldn’t leave you in there all alone. At least I thought of the rug, right?” He tried to lighten the mood but it was too heavy to accomplish. “He would have killed you. Bi-Han. Raiden told me a bit about him. There are murals you should see. But I… I had to get to you. I’m not sorry for that.”

“I know you’re not. And I’m grateful that you did. I was terrified. Too weak to fight and he…” You closed your eyes and focused on breathing. You’d felt so damn helpless. You hadn’t felt helpless since you were a kid and you hated it. There was no closet to hide in here to cry it out. Nowhere to hide from Liu Kang. “I hurt you. Again. And Kung Lao.”

“It wasn’t you, Y/N. You were hurt too.” He brushed his fingers over the sore marks on your arm from the ice beneath the sleeves of your hanfu. You nodded but you felt responsible for all of it even if you’d had no control over it. You felt responsible for not having control. Liu Kang had gotten you to talk about it, something you hadn’t wanted to do. It was easier to cry alone and then fake okay until you felt okay. You didn’t want any pity. Liu Kang didn’t think you were pitiful. He was worried about you. He let go of your hand then brushed his fingers over your cheek, just beneath your eye and you knew he was wiping away tears that had, regretfully, fought their way free.

“Ugh.” You whined and leaned back, sniffled, and then wiped your eyes free of the blurry tears so no more of them would rebelliously fall down your cheeks. “I hate this.”

“This feels like a much healthier emotional response, at least.” He teased and you laughed and then shoved his shoulder lightly. He pretended you pushed him much harder and then scooted closer to you.

“I don’t like crying.”

“No one likes crying, Y/N.”

“Fair point.” You stuttered and then closed your eyes. “Will you sit still so I can finish?”

“I’m fine.” He laughed and took your hand as you made to wipe one of the scrapes on his face. “I’m fine, Y/N. I’m tougher than you think.”

“So am I, Liu.” You didn’t have the strength to back that up anymore, but you still meant it.

“I know.” His fingers brushed over your jaw and beneath your chin, tilting you to look back up at him. You were powerless to deny him. He smelled of soot and blood. “I made a choice to protect you. I won’t lose you.” He crept ever close to your lips and you admired his as they came close. There was a cut on his lower lip you hadn’t noticed, the red of the wound having melded into the red of his lips. He was attractive even wounded. It would have even been sexy if you hadn’t been the one to hurt him. “Don’t give up.”

“I’m not.” You assured him but your voice felt weak. Was it because of everything that had happened or because Liu Kang was holding you so close, so intimately? “I am being realistic though, Liu. This is the right place to be. I won’t forgive myself if I…” You didn’t want to lose him. You didn’t want to lose him or Kung Lao.

“And I won’t forgive myself for not protecting you.”

“It’s not me I’m worried about. I’m not the one who needs protecting.”

“That’s not the point I’m making, Y/N. I want to protect the people I care about. Not because I don’t think you’re capable but because you are precious to me. Have I not made that clear? How much I care about you? How much you mean to me?”

You shivered all over and closed your eyes, swearing that your heart had skipped a beat. He just went right out and said it. Dammit, he was romantic. The tension was so thick you swore that you struggled to breathe. Liu Kang created his own atmosphere. Then again, it could have just between the two of you. You liked that.

“I…” You struggled with words, as if the air were too thick for them. His lips were so close, bruised, and bloodied, but perfect. Would kissing him hurt him, you wondered? He seemed willing to feel pain at a chance at your lips. You swallowed hard, the lump in your throat ever present being this close to him. His fingers pushed your hair back from your face and you leaned into his touch, the whole thing having become such a comfort. He’d done this so much that you craved it, like an addict.

His lips met yours and you felt that swelling in his lower lip and swore you broke. But he held you up. He kept the pieces of you in place. When you were falling apart, Liu Kang wasn’t afraid to pick you up. He wasn’t afraid of the mess you’d make. He didn’t criticize you for your feelings. He didn’t belittle you for your worries. But he supported you. He winced as you grasped at his forearm and you pulled back from that sweet kiss very suddenly.

“No.” He urged his lips back to yours and you laughed against them as he wrapped his arm around you before you could argue with him and pulled you right into his lap. You placed your hand on his cheek and he urged his knees up to urge you higher, tilting his head up right into that sweet, tender kiss.

“Your lip.” You muttered against it.

“It’s fine, Y/N, don’t… you dare stop kissing me because of that.”

“Wow, bossy.” You laughed as he placed his hand at the back of your neck as if to make a point. Pushing his hair back you shoved that worry from your mind. You sat sharing soft, intimate kisses in the dim lamplight of your new space. His lips tasted like the soot and blood he smelled like and it gave you the oddest thrill to memorize those new marks on his lips. Strong hands brushed over your arms and then down to your hips and you pulled back from that kiss, reluctantly. He looked in a daze, but a happy one. As if you’d woken him from a nap.

His thumb brushed over your hip, hands gently caressing over the outside of your thighs and back up again. Liu Kang was no longer nervous to touch you and his hands at your thighs were practically a death sentence.

“…you’re trying to get out of getting cleaned up.”

“It’s working.” He smiled up at you and pressed his lips to yours again and you returned that kiss for a second before pulling back.

“Boy, is it working.”

“The scrapes aren’t going anywhere.”

“I know.” You brushed his loose, messy hair from his face. “Let me take care of them?”

“Mmm…” He considered this and his hands returned to your waist. “Yes, of course, Y/N.” You took to tending to the scrape on his jaw, on his cheek, on his forehead. It was soothing. He closed his eyes and let you take care of him as if the motion were putting him to sleep. Then you finally set aside the first aid supplies and admired your handiwork. Liu Kang was only made more handsome by the scrapes on his face. How was that possible? Were you that wrapped around his finger? “How’s it look, doc?”

“I hate to say it, but incredibly attractive.” You sighed dreamily and he laughed and leaned his head up to give you a sleepy kiss.

“You made me tired.”

“I could tell.”

“It was nice to be cared for by you.”

“I care for you.” You weren’t good at saying what you felt but Liu Kang made you feel more confident about the lousy way you expressed yourself.

“Careful, Y/N. That might mean too much to me.”

You shivered from head to toe as his hand brushed over your back. Then he sat up sleepily and wrapped his arms around you. “I care about you, Liu.” You rested your hand on the side of his neck and closed your eyes. “More than you know.” He shivered beneath your touch.

“If I stayed tonight… would that be okay?”

You worried instantly what would happen if you had an incident during your dreams again.

“…what if…”

“I’m willing to take the risk.” Liu Kang didn’t seem as concerned about it as you thought he should be. His thumb brushed over your lower back and he left a soft, sleepy kiss on your shoulder. He must have been exhausted.

“Stay.” You relented far too easily. You wanted his arms around you forever. They felt safe and strong. Liu Kang lifted you up and then lazily rested you in bed before crawling in right after you.

“You okay to sleep in that?”

“Yeah.” You adjusted yourself in his arms. “It’s fine.”

“Seems like a lot.” He closed his eyes and urged you to rest with your back to him, tugging you close. Apparently, Liu Kang was fond of being the big spoon. You couldn’t argue. As his hands brushed over your stomach and you sunk into him you felt you could lay like this in his arms forever.

“Oh, really?”

“Could help with that…”

“Wow.” You laughed but even as he joked you could feel him falling asleep next to you. “We have a lot to talk about, you know.”

“I do. Too comfortable right now though. Thought we made good progress.”

“You’re falling asleep.” You whispered as he slurred against your shoulder, face buried in your hair. He made a positive sound and you let him rest. It would take you ages to sleep but feeling his heart beating against your back with his arms securely around you was the best end to this horrible day that you could have hoped for.