#for the life of me cannot remember why this was in my camera roll

[my-darling-boy]

We’re in a trench and you keep hearing non stop slurping sounds and you look over and I’m just

[technoarcanist]

WAR NEVER CHANGES. BUT,

WARFARE NEVER STOPS CHANGING

"I've seen countless reasons why most mech pilots don't make the cut, but one of the largest hurdles are the physical alterations. The implants and modifications done to the fleshware is so extreme that it's enough to push most would-be pilots away from day 1.

Back in the day, when mech tech was still in its wild west years, when the technology was still in its infancy, things were different. Levers, joysticks, switches, a chair, most of the first models were something between the cockpit of a construction vehicle and a fighter ship.

Pilots in those days still consisted largely of the usual suspects. Test pilots, army jocks, space force veterans looking for something new, the occasional crazy who lucked their way up the ranks. All you needed back then was to be fit enough to work complex machinery. 'Handler's wouldn't be a coined phrase for nearly a decade. I still remember being a kid and seeing repurposed older models in the mech fighting streams.

Everything changed with the Bidirectional Cerebellum Computer Interface. To say nothing of how it changed civilian life, it was a military marvel. The BiCCI saw the creation of Mechs as we understand them today. The first generation were just retrofits, older models with a pilot's chair, and even manual controls to use in an emergency, but even then we knew that was only temporary. Before long, sleek frames of sharp angles, railguns and plasma cannons were rolling off the factory floor.

Like many things, it began small, optimising first for cockpit space by removing the manual controls. Before long, my then-supervisors thought, "Why have this glass? Why not hook the pilot's eyesight right into the advanced multi-spectral camera system? Before long, cockpits were but soft harnesses made to house a living body, their very soul wired into the machinery. Obviously, for security reasons, I cannot tell you everything about how our latest cockpits work, but suffice to say we've been further blurring the line between pilot and frame ever since.

This drew a very different crowd. Out were the army jocks and powerlifters. The only ones who even dared to have the interface hardware installed into their brainstem and spinal cord were the dispossessed, the misanthropes, those who sought not to control their new body, but to be controlled by it. No AI can work a mech properly on its own, but our pilots are never really in full control either anymore. Those who do try to go against the symbiosis get a nosebleed at best, and vegetative seizures at worst.

And that was that. The only people left who pilots these things are those who had already been broken, those who sougt a permenant reprive from being anything resembling human. A lot of my department quit around this time. I've lost a few friends over it, I'm not shy to say. Did we knew we'd be bringing in the more vulnerable people? Of course we did. But, the wheels of progress must turn, as they say, and it wasn't like we were shy of volunteers.

In our latest models, we have refined an even more advanced frame. Again, security detail prevents me from divulging too much, but one breakthrough we've made is decreasing action latency by approximately 0.02s by amputating the limbs from our pilots and replacing them with neural interface pads.

Using the pads where the limbs once were, pilots are screwed directly into the cockpit, which itself can now be 30% smaller thanks to the saved space. And, of course, we provide basic humanoid cybernetics as part of their employment contract while they are with us. Not that most of them are ever voluntarily out of their cockpits long enough to make use of them. Even removing the tubes from their orifices for routine cleaning incurs a large level of resistence.

And, yes, some of them scream, some of them break, some become so catatonic that they might as well be a peripheral processor for their mech's AI. But not a single one, not even one pilot, in all the dolls i've ever trained, have ever accepted the holidays we offer, the retirement packages, the stipends.

As you say, there are those who like to call me a monster for my work. I can see why. After all, they don't see the way my pilots' crotches dribble when I tell them I'll be cutting away their limbs, or the little moans they try to hide when we first meet and I explain that they'd forever be on the same resource level as a machine hereafter.

Those who call me a monster don't realise that, even after going public with how we operate our pilots, even after ramping up mech frame production, we still have more than twice as many volunteers as frames.

Those who call me a monster cannot accept that my pilots are far happier as a piece of meat in a machine of death than as the shell of a human they once were.

Those who call me a monster never consider the world my pilots grew up in to make them suitable candidates in the first place."

-Dr Francine Heathwich EngD

Dept. Cybernetic Technologies @ Dynaframe Industries

[In response to human rights violations accusations levied by the Pilot Rehabilitation Foundation]

[thatsdemko]

fake it? - p.gavi

mini series masterlist

masterlist

requested: n

pairing: Pablo gavi x fem!reader

warnings: hatred + fake dating(fav trope) + slight age gap

a/n: welcome to the first part of my mini series!!! hope you all enjoy it☺️

you agreed to one night you would put on a fake happy face and pretend to love the Pablo gavi. as much as you despised the young boy, he had came to your flat begging you to help him out and he reminded you that you owed him.

“remember you owe me! I helped you when you were drunk, it’s your turn for pay back!” those words stung your chest and were constantly replaying in your head the whole night you posed next to him. you didn’t even want to read the headlines of tomorrows news, you were helping out a “friend” but you couldn’t help but imagine what your family would have to say to the images.

“just keep smiling, you’re doing amazing.” Pablo said through his teeth. a smile planted on his face, his unbelievably sweaty hand in yours. you could see the end of the carpet, you were dying to reach the finish line. you couldn’t wait to step inside and drink the night away.

men with cameras and women with microphones shouted his name trying to grab his attention for a picture or for an interview. he only promised to do one, and then you could be swept inside to enjoy the evening in your separate ways. you were thankful pedri was there already inside, you couldn’t wait to talk to someone who knew you two weren’t dating.

“who is the lovely lady you brought with you tonight? she looks absolutely stunning!” the interviewer pointed to you off to the side, and the camera panned to you watching the other couples flaunt the red carpet. your eyes were full of shock when you saw Lionel Messi step out with his wife, you spent ages of your school years obsessing over him.

“my girlfriend,” the words felt uncomfortable coming out of his mouth, he turned gesturing for you to join him for a quick second, and your hand instantly cupped his pulling on your fake smile for the camera, “this is y/n.”

you could see it now, he just introduced you as his girlfriend and you could already see the football fan accounts losing their minds over you. you could feel the vibration of your phone against the fabric of your purse, your worst nightmare was happening and you weren’t sure how you could escape it now. because now you were stuck having to pose with Pablo gavi for a couple more months, until you could “break” things off.

“thank you so much for your time! enjoy inside.” the interviewer smiled waving a goodbye to you both, as you were swept away by a carpet attendee. officially making your way inside, you let go of his sweaty palm wiping your hand on the back of his suit coat.

“I cannot believe you had to do that. why didn’t you just ignore her question?” you took the first glass of champagne you saw from one of the servers and immediately downed the sparkling liquid.

“ignore her? she asked it as clear as day, y/n.” he rolled his eyes, he scanned the room looking for the familiar face of his friend, he needed to get away from you so you both could enjoy the night as promised.

“now my name is going to be all over the press. you have no idea what you’ve now done to my life.” your eyes finally found pedri first, and you were off to go talk to him. you needed someone with a sane mind to chat with.

pablo didn’t mean for his mistake to hurt you. the words slipped out of his mouth when he looked over at you, the red dress was complementing your curves and breasts he was so mesmerized by you. he didn’t know the words slipped from his mouth until the interviewer was repeating the words back to him.

“ah future mrs.gavi, everyone is already talking about you two.” pedri’s eyes lit up seeing you storm to him, his friend trailing behind you, pushing through groups of people just to stop you from ratting him out.

“how long do you think I’m going to have to keep this up?” you scoffed, you felt a hand gently brush your lower back sending butterflies through your stomach as your whole body jumped. you moved out of the way to see it was Pablo behind you.

“maybe a couple of months? it keeps his name from bad press,” pedri pointed his index finger at his friend before turning to you, “and it makes you look like you’re helping a troubled teenager. it’s a win win.”

“troubled teenager? please I’m only six months younger than her.” he scoffed noticing pedri’s head tilt towards a man with camera taking pictures for an event, and immediately Pablo’s hand touched your lower back it was only to keep with the bit. or for him, was it? he loved watching you bothered by the fact that you had to “date” him.

but as they always say, fake it until you make it. right?

[peachjagiya]

I read your response to my ask and just wanted to add a few things after seeing your comments and that of others.

“If you don't believe the ITS conversation was scripted - I do and am more convinced since AYS - then they still aired a conversation about Tae's mental health that painted depression as distant and awkward and I think that's shitty too. And I don't blame JK for it because frankly I don't believe they were that distant. I just don't really think the company has best interests at heart always.)”

The biggest reason why I don’t and have never really believed that the ITS conversation was scripted is because of Jungkook. The man cannot act to save his life and he is way too honest for this world. Jungkook is so bad at lying that even his body will naturally give him away when he is lying or saying something that he doesn’t really believe and when I watched ITS, both his and Tae’s reactions seemed so genuine to me that I feel like it is unfair to accuse them of just acting a script after they choose to share such a vulnerable moment with us.

I never really understood why some people found it odd that taekook decided to let that conversation be shared when this is BTS we are talking about. When have they ever shied away from letting fans into some private things or private moments of their lives? I mean, didn’t we all literally watch Tae and Jin squash the little beef they had? Those two fought and argued and were mad at each other and you would think that is a moment where they will want to settle things in private and away from the cameras but they still let us see them talking about it. We literally saw Tae crying his eye out as he talked with Jin. Jimin and Tae have never ever tried to make us think they are perfect friends. People claim that the company pushed the soulmate agenda but I don’t think so because by saying that the soulmate agenda was pushed, wouldn’t that mean that the company was trying to make it seem like they were perfect? But Jimin, Tae and the rest of the members have always told us that Vmin fought alot. I remember that one BtS segment where they boys had on some purple and white suits ( can’t remember the name) and tae asked Jimin who he got along with the least while they were rookies and Jimin straight up told Tae it was him that he got along with the least. They have spoken about how much they fought, argued and disagreed with each other on so many things. When did they ever try to hide the fact that they weren’t perfect? Namjoon even said Jimin and Tae will fight alot but will still always stick up for each other or make excuses for each other, Jungkook even told us that the dumpling fight was much worse than we thought it was. My point is, these boys have never tried to make us feel like they lived perfect lives and never had disagreements with each other so why was it so strange to so many that Taekook decided to have that talk infront of the camera? Even before AYS aired, many people were mad and said that it was a fanservice show to continue pushing the Jikook agenda but let’s be serious for a moment. What kind of job is the company doing in pushing Jikook if they allowed the conversation about them not making time for each other in the same content that is supposed to be pushing the ship? What sense does it make? So for the people who asked why taekook would want to have a conversation like that on camera, why would Jikook also want to have a conversation like that on camera? They could just talk about all that when the cameras weren’t rolling or the company could have easily cut it if their agenda was to push Jikook but they didn’t. They left it all in there and also aired Jk’s call to Tae.

This isn’t what i’d do if I was trying to sell a ship’s romance to gullible fans but maybe that’s just me.

One of the reasons why BTS as a group has such a huge and somewhat loyal fanbase is because of how relatable they are and have always been. They have always shown us themselves as human beings who are no different from us and that is one of the reasons why fans get so hooked to BTS because there is this feel of authenticity when you watch them. I’m not saying they don’t lie, pretend or act but the thing is, even when something which they do is scripted, they literally say it themselves. We have tons of bangtan bombs of them rehearsing their scripts or talking about the moves they will make with each other on stage for fanservice moments. I just think that if the ITS convo was a script, we would have been able to tell by the way Jungkook and even Tae were acting but I just find it hard to believe that when Jimin went and called Jk to take him to tae, Jungkook was just acting like he didn’t know. I refuse to believe that the way Jungkook sat there intently listening to Tae and responding to him was an act. I also refuse to believe that when Jungkook sat down alone explaining things more detaily, he was just repeating a script he had memorized or reading from a teleprompter. I may not know Jk personally but I don’t think he is good at acting and even showing such genuine emotions.

I also saw some replies I would love to respond to.

“Not all moments can be cut out. If it’s a live, or an interview done by outsiders, the editing won’t be possible or out of BH’s hands. Hint’s from staff to point to Jk and Tae moving away would be picked up by them non the less. A lot of distance on screen would have been done by tkk themselves, but inside perception (from management) would be different from outside perception (audience). Management would be prone to be overly cautious probably.”

It is true that not everything can be cut out but why would the staff leave in moments of Taekook cuddling, touching each other, and all that only to go cut moments where they are just breathing in each other’s direction? Unless you think taekook literally spend all their days with hand on each other, then I don’t see what more suggestive thing they could do infront of a dozen cameras and staff that are worse than cuddling, sitting inbetween legs and rubbing bare thighs. I mean yes, there is worse things people can do but definitely not infront of over a dozen staff and cameras right? So why would the staff leave in the worse ones and cut the ones that are much better? Besides, there is tons of cuts in so many other duo interactions. On ITS there was a suspicious cut after Jk went and grabbed Hobi’s ass and then tried lifting his shirt..that part was cut. During the filming on BWL, there was a suspicious cut at one part where Jk was running towards Jimin with the speed of light, in one bangtan bomb, there was a suspicious cut when Jimin was about to hug Yoongi. There are so many “suspicious” cuts with all the members. Even on AYS episodes 4, there was a cut when Jungkook was about to put his arms around Jimin while they were snorkeling. I’m pretty sure if that was Taekook, it would have been viewed as another moments of the company cutting taekook moments to hide them. Don’t you think that if management was trying to be overly cautious as this reply suggested then they wouldn’t even show us moments of taekook sleeping together? Almost everytime Taekook shared a room in BV or ITS, we always got atleast one clip of them sleeping together but we didn’t get clips of Yoonmin sleeping together when they shared rooms, in one BV episode jikook shared a room too but didn’t even see what the room looked like on the inside, we only saw the door but almost everytime Taekook have officially shared a room, we got footage of them sleeping together and in one of those moments, some taekookers even swear that Jk kissed Tae or something. How is this them being overly cautious?

“Taekook despite being assumed to be in a relationship are friends first. Anon's first point is so out of the loop for human behavior. They might be aware of SK society or aud but this awareness is not always present. It's not like they were instructed to never been seen together. Trying to balance would alwas create chances of slip up. Staff can also separate them in the middle of shoot if and when they think their time for closeness has increased. (Bh has to show them.)”

While I understand that they cannot always be separated, my point is that the times when they are shown together they show them doing things that you would think they would cut out if they were really trying to hide then or potray them as distant. Again, why show them cuddling, touching, Kissing each other’s cheeks and then cut them when they are about to just breath in each other’s direction? Wouldn’t it be the opposite? Also, taekook are professionals and I do agree that they might slip up sometimes or tend to gravitate towards each other but when you know that you have something to hide, being cautious becomes second nature. It’s not like they cannot bear being away from each other or not touching each other for a few hours while working is it and seeing in in behind the scenes videos we do see them both spend a good amount of time with other members, I take that to mean that they are not glued to each other 24/7 so how much of content can the staff possibly cut of them when they spend time too with other members?

“According to reality TV personalities when cameras are on you most of the time you forget about them.

Some separations can be explained away with theories, but definately not all.

Separation is also just a small part of TKers narrative. When you add it together with everything else and take in the time period and circumstances, like age, contracts, etc it is just another perfect fitting puzzle piece. It's odd to be able to fit such a coherent timeline together.”

When cameras are on you most of the the time you grow to forget about them, true but not when you have something to hide or protect. Not when you are in a relationship with your same sex band mate in a homophobic country. These men usually have over a dozen staff filming them on the other end, it’s not just one or two people so it would be almost impossible for them not to be concious that they are being watched. It is natural, that when you have something to hide or are guilty of something, you cannot be at ease. There would be slip ups yes, that is 100% guaranteed but it never gets to that stage where you become so used to it that you completely forget and just behave like you are in the privacy of your home. I don’t believe it does.

I believe that taekook do have an incredibly special bond but some of these theories do take away their autonomy and paints them as such helpless pathetic puppets and it doesn’t quite sit well with me. I don’t believe they always have control of things when it comes to the company but I think they have enough control to decide how and when they should be used. Tae finding out about the jeju trip two days before, asking to join and being allowed to join tells me that they are somehow in control of things because the company could have very easily refused if they had some agenda but they didn’t. Just saying.

Scripted is a misleading word for me to have used. No I don't think they're reading from a word for word script. I think it's produced.

There's a lot of "I just refuse to believe" and "it seemed to me" and "I don't think"

And that's fine, that's your reading of events. It's not at all mine and we're looking at the same footage.

As for Jungkook can't act... he wears his heart on his sleeve for sure but:

🐰: Where's Taehyung? I don't know, I don't keep in touch with the members all the time. He's probably somewhere.

Cue a few hours passing and it being revealed that depending on where this live fell in the day, Tae was either next to him at that point or literally on his way and JK knew it because he'd been expecting him, as revealed in the Jungkook music shows sketch video.

I'm not sure he looked at all like he was acting but it turns out he was.

You say:

Some of these theories do take away their autonomy and paints them as such helpless pathetic puppets and it doesn't quite sit well with me

Doing your job is not helpless and pathetic. Besides, in our "theories" both Tae and JK have pushed back in their own ways. Half the stuff we know about is because Tae posted it. Their choice to reveal that stuff is not an indicator that they're not closeted. It's an indicator that they're human with human feelings and sometimes the closet is stifling. Of course they crack the door open to breathe a little for three seconds. Maybe JK just wants to post a couple pic in the bathroom at Atomix. Maybe Tae just wants the world to know JK loves him enough to fly 9 hours.

Those things aren't inherently queer, no, but you also can't look at them revealing this stuff and say "well, they're clearly not in the closet then are they??" I just don't think the closet works that way and the expectation that the closet means you stand dead still and stay alert is odd. Like maybe you don't tongue kiss in public but you can hug and still be pretty safe in your closet as long as you're saying the right things, leaving it ambiguous and shutting the live down when JK sings in your house. 🙂

Ultimately I'm glad the company feels legit to you but I lack the same faith. Jury is out on whether that's me being overcynical or not.

[samijey]

broke my promise to myself and actually watched the jey/gunther match and let me tell you... whoever booked that finish wanted jey to look like an idiot. mega rant under the cut which you should honestly read im not your mama but you should read it

he splashes gunther after getting dominated for 80% of the match and an (honestly underwhelming) spear and we're meant to believe the +2yr champion who's beaten virtually everyone on the roster (including drew who recently beat jey TWICE) was about to be defeated right there?......okay............ but it gets worse

when the referee (for no real good reason) stops the count at 2 after jimmy rings the bell, jey "forgets" about gunther and turns his back to him, allowing gunther to get back up almost IMMEDIATELY (remember we were meant to think he was about to be beaten 5 seconds earlier) yet jey quickly superkicks him BUT THEN decides to dive at jimmy on the outside instead of going directly for another splash (girl help) so ofc when he does go for the splash, gunther gets the knees up, and to add a cherry on top of this shit sunday, pins jey right there after performing no extra offense - doesn't even roll him up, jey just lies there flat on his back and gets pinned (while michael cole screams "GUNTHER ROLLS UP JEY USO" to make me even more mad, apparently, as zero actual rolling takes place in the ring - just a leg hook & weight on the shoulders combo... and not a particularly vicious one either) I just ??????

and of-fucking-course as the TV feed gets cut, cue cody and punk who come out all smiles ready to do the usual fanservice routine for the live crowd and suddenly jey is mostly done selling what just happened and is smiling along with whatever you wanna call it - sending the crowd home happy?? since when did that become mandatory for broadcast shows??? why can't emotionally devastating moments count just as much when it comes to delivering a satisfying ending to the live crowd??? are you telling me they couldnt have had jey walk to the back WHILE SELLING the heartbreak/frustration of what happened and THEN send cody out to do the fanservice thing??? fuck maintaining suspension of disbelief I guess - you can't even argue that "it's fine it was just a treat for the live crowd" because WWE has posted the footage everywhere and promoted it heavily.

imagine if after the camera stopped rolling at last year's rumble, sami had got up, undone kevin's handcuffs and they both hugged and cut a cheerful promo at the crowd - everyone would've blasted wwe for undermining the impact of that finish and not letting the moment breathe.

here's another, even more similar example - remember what happened after summerslam when jimmy attacked jey? he sold the devastation of the moment all the way until he exited the arena, so why is this any different? because it's "just" TV and not a PPV? nah, i'll tell you why: because wwe does not give a shit about this current version of jey's character - he's there to spew the same catchphrase 100x an hour (because it sells merch and pops the crowd let's be honest), display a grand total of two personality traits, and rub his popularity off onto the people wwe actually consider stars

for comparison - you cannot tell me that if it was cody in this position (just lost an important match thanks to the most important person in his life + got attacked by them on top of it) wwe wouldn't have had him look devastated or cut an emotional, tearful promo that would've then been posted and promoted everywhere

"chill, it's not that serious" my apologies for wanting something i love (and KNOW can be so much better with minimal effort) to have a basic level of logic and thought put into it, it's not like wrestling booking is rocket science and we know wwe is NOT incapable of actually delivering good stuff 🤷??? the standards for this show are so damn low and seeing no one else be bothered by it does my fucking head in ouch ouch wheres the aspirin bye

[hooked-on-elvis]

ELVIS PRESLEY'S INDUCTION IN THE ROCK AND ROLL HALL OF FAME (1986)

— A part of George Klein's speech explained by Elvis himself.

George Klein - 1986 Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Speech (accepting on behalf of Elvis Presley). During his acceptance speech on behalf of Elvis Presley, George Klein quotes the Jaycees Speech Elvis gave on January 16, 1971, during the Ten Outstanding Young Men of the Nation for 1970 ceremony, but the most special part to me was listening to George saying:

I never saw Elvis Presley refusing an autograph. I never saw Elvis refusing a handshake. I never saw Elvis refusing to take a picture with anybody.

This made me go back to an Elvis interview from 1962. EP was filming "It Happened At the World's Fair" (filming took place between August 28 to September 17, 1962 and the movie was released in early 1963) when he took some time to be interviewed by Lloyd Shearer. To him, Elvis told his reasons why he never refused an autograph or picture. He was only 27 years old when he said:

August 17, 1962: ELVIS INTERVIEWED BY REPORTER LLOYD SHEARER.

Lloyd Shearer: Elvis, people's opinions of you seems to have changed since back in the old days. Now everybody thinks you're a model fellow... you know, you're a good guy... epitome of a young man. Now I'm just wondering, is it by accident of by design? What do you think it is? EP: Well, I've tried to be the same all through this thing. Naturally, you learn a lot about people, and you're involved in a lot of different situations. But I've tried to be the same, I mean the way I was brought up. And I always considered other people's feelings. I've never... in other words, I didn't kick anybody on the way (laughs). And I've always treated people just like the way I would like to be treated myself. And I consider other people's feelings. I don't assume the attitude of 'get these people out of here', like I have heard of being done, because those people are sincere in their feelings. And if they want autographs and pictures and things like that, I don't just sign the autographs and the pictures and so forth to help my popularity or to make them like me. I do it because I know that they are sincere. And they see you and they want an autograph to take home. They got an autograph book, or they've got their little camera and everything, so you have to know that. And if you don't do it, it will make them mad at you, they don't understand, you hurt their feelings and you make a lot of enemies that way. And for no reason, because it's as simple as this. Once you get involved in this racket... er, business (laughs), your life is public. Regardless of what anybody says... 'my private life is my own'. Well it is to a certain extent. I mean, everybody has to have a certain amount of privacy. But once you get involved in this business and you're doing a public service, you're trying to entertain people, your life is not your own. Because people are gonna want to know what you are doing, where you are, what you wear, what you eat. These things are natural, are normal, and you have to consider that. You consider that the people are sincere. They don't know the kind of life you lead. They don't know what kind of person you are. And do I try to remember that, that's all. It's simple. It's no problem. It's no big effort that I put forth. I don't have any plans or anything. I just act on my own initiative. It's the way I feel that is the right way, like I have [done] with everything else. Thank God I've been pretty fortunate. I haven't made any bad, bad decisions... and everything. But it's the way I was brought up, you know. My surroundings, my mother and my father and the whole family. We're always considerate of other people's feelings.

Deep inside our hearts, we, fans, feel Elvis Presley deserved much more than life gave him, beyond fortune, fame or recognition, but since we cannot change the past, I will keep saying until the very day I die, with profound conviction, about how Elvis deserves all the people's respect. Also, it would be amazing if the entertainers around the world, from today and from the times to come, could listen to Elvis' words from this 1962 interview, get inspired and try to live up to it.

About the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction, well, George Klein did justice on his quick speech that day. One of the most important, special and unforgettable things about Elvis is how humble, down to earth and loving he was to people and this is something will always worth being addressed. EP may have changed his way of doing things but the important parts of him never changed indeed. There will never be another Elvis Aaron Presley, and the world wouldn't be the same without his blinding, bright shining light that still airs above us. ♥

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The August 17, 1962 interview is one of the few one-on-one lengthy interviews of Elvis' career and it's full of great insights on the King's mind, a few precious glimpses with the way he truly used to think and feel about many aspects of life. You can (and should) listen to the FULL INTERVIEW HERE.

[malebodyexhibit]

Young, dumb, and up for fun! (a Next Door Boy tale)

"3, 2, and... bro! Look at the camera. Why are you drooling over your own body?!" Melnick said. He wore the red hoodie in the picture. Surprisingly, he didn't try to flaunt his youthful body. Instead he seemed eager to play the duck-faced, selfie-addict grandson whose body he possessed now.

"How can he help it? I mean, look at these abs and these pink nipples!" I said. I was holding up my grandson's shirt and flicking out his tongue. I made sure to show off the waistband of his underwear. "You act like we have all the time in the world to appreciate this, but the agency only allotted us a couple days!"

Ulrich finally dropped his black hoodie, hiding the teen's abs. "And why are you calling me 'bro'? Can't we act like ourselves?"

Melnick rolled his eyes and dug his phone in his pocket. "What's the point of becoming young again if we don't embrace it? You said it yourselves: we only have 40 hours to enjoy this—yes, I am counting the hours." Melnick moved away from us and pulled his red hoodie off, revealing a tight young body. Six pack abs flexed in the light of the restroom. A trail of still maturing pubic hair peeked from his underwear band. "I have to live with this little college asshole since he and his parents still mooch off me. I sit in that house watching him work out, talk smack, take selfies, and act like he's hot shit. I used to be his age for Christ's sake! I had the body and the looks he has. If I wanted to ogle his body like some poolside MILF, then I'd let him continue his life sunbathing in the backyard. But I want to BE HIM. A better one." Melnick ran a hand over his right pec, then ran it over his washboard stomach. "Why drool over your body when you can drool over mine?"

Melnick looked up at us with a pouty lip a meek look in his eyes. Damn, he knew how to play up being a 21st century twink. It still creeped me out a little how he's calling the body his. These bodies were really our grandsons (well, Ulrich was in the body of a 19 year old teen who was friends with them). They had gone out on a joyride in my convertible before totaling it. They begged and begged not to get in trouble. I finally decided on a compromise of having them sign up with the agency Next Door Boy. Using cutting edge technology, a passenger consciousness can be installed in a willing participant. The process was relatively cheap considering what it is. This was because the three boys allowed themselves to be... freelance hosts and made up the cost of procedure through allowing the Next Door Boy agency to rent out services through them. The services in question are body possession or co-piloting services (for those who just want to voyeur a young stud's daily life). There's more to this that allows the freelance hosts to decide what can and cannot be done while being possessed, but... they didn't fully read their contracts before signing them.

"I'd love to drool over his body," I said, correcting Melnick, but moving closer to him, reaching my hand for his lower back.

Melnick grabbed the back of my neck, his ring fingers digging into by skin. "My body," he said before pulling me into a kiss. I pressed myself into his taller, thin body. He started to reach his other hand under my hoodie, running his fingers along my navel, then my abs before resting his palm against my chest. "Damn," he said after breaking our kiss, "you're good with that mouth."

"I'm even better with this tongue," I said, pulling away his hand from my chest so I could lower onto a knee.

"Holy fuck," breathed Ulrich as he stripped off his black hoodie. I was already reaching for his gray sweatpants. I didn't want to tell Melnick, but I preferred Ulrich. He was wearing the body of a skilled basketball player. While I didn't know his name, I remember my grandson and him practicing by the garage. Melnick's grandson seemed like an annoying shit, but a six pack is a six pack, and a sucking two dicks seemed better than deep throating one.

"Why am I so goddamn horny?!" Melnick gasped as I ran my hand over his bulge. I looked up at him as I tugged down his pants—underwear and all. His cock sprung out smacked my cheek. I laughed and grabbed hold of it, steadying it as it throbbed in my hand. It was a good 9 inches of meat. I took in the cock head and dug one hand into Melnick's twink ass, playing with his tight hole. I moaned with a mouthful of cock and precum.

"Don't forget me," Ulrich said, grabbing the back of my head and trying to force me to focus on his growing shaft in his right hand. It was thicker and larger than Melnick. Probably 11 inches and about twice the girth of Melnick. Yet, I couldn't pull myself from Melnick's rhythmic thrusting. "C'mon, bro, let me in him." He said to Melnick as Melnick was mouth agape and eyes toward the ceiling.

Soon the thrusting slowed and became a forceful pounding as his cock unloaded ropes of teenage cum into my mouth. He was so enraptured in his climax that he didn't realize the string of drool from his mouth still agape in orgasm.

Ulrich managed to pull me from Melnick's deflating, slobbered cock, and had me gagging on his pipe. Unlike Melnick, he lacked the rhythmic thrusting and instead just forcefully tried to jam it down my throat. I tried to adjust his speed with my hands, but it was useless to push against the handful of muscle. Thankfully, he ejaculated and doubled over me. His naked body slick with sweat from his exertion as he struggled to regain his composure on the bathroom floor.

I didn't even know that I had cummed in my skinny jeans. My own cock was untouched but still twitched with ejaculation. A wet spot formed at the front of my pants.

"What the hell was that?!" gasped Melnick. "I didn't think these guys were... like that." Despite face fucking a guy, Melnick couldn't say the word gay. "I swear my grandson dated girls. I swear he was straight!"

Indeed he was, I thought. Since I was the only one of us who had some measure of wealth, I had the Next Door Boy agency implement a same-sex attraction feature. Despite these teens being straight, while we are renting them out, they are open to some man-on-man action.

"You took my dick well," Ulrich said. Sweat continued to trickle down his face. He didn't seem bothered his sweatpants were bunched up around his ankles still.

"Yeah, I did," I said. "But you need to learn how to use it! You were like a dog humping blind into a bitch. Thankfully," I smiled, "we have plenty of time."

[maybeamiles]

My favorite part of an anime opening is picking it apart for spoilers/predictions SO THAT'S WHAT I'M GONNA DO FOR ONE PIECE HERE WE GO

As of writing this I'm caught up to Ep 1093 and know of a few manga spoilers for Law, Kid, Kuma, and Bonney, but everything else here is gonna be predictions. SPOILERS MAY BE AHEAD, BE WARNED.

Starting with the first thing that caught my eye, Luffy looking at someone standing on the ruin of a giant metal thing! Who is this person? Is that a giant's suit of armor? It looks like it was cut down with a giant axe. Why is this part of egghead so worn out? Can't wait to find out cause I cannot piece this one together from context clues!

Next there's all the Vegapunks. Looks like there's 6 of them, and they seem to work in pairs like Lillith and the guy who told her to be careful (can't for the life of me remember his name tho)

Of course we can't forget about CP9 and the return of Lucci. Can't wait to see what that bastard gets up to in the future.

Next there's a set! The Vegapunks, Garp's Marines, and Cross Guild. I think these are simply flashes of characters that will be important for this arc. It is interesting that Cross Guild is paired with these two. The Vegapunks used to be allied with the marines, but I have a suspicion that they'll become a neutral party in this upcoming arc. I'm pretty sure CP9 is after them, and they've been set apart from both pirates and Marines in the opening.

Now HERE'S WHERE IT GETS INTERESTING. We know Coby was kidnapped by Blackbeard, and we know that he's going to have to escape, presumably with the help of his fellow marines (especially if this opening is anything to go by). But pairing Coby with the question "Are your dreams still pure?" 🤨 Are they still pure, Mr. Marine? And is that old man Luffy and baby Jimbei? And who is the glitchy hand high-fiving Atlas? A hologram or something more thematically relevant? Are the Vegapunk's dreams still pure?

Anyways shout out to the Heart Pirates and Fem Bepo especially. Everyone talks about Fem Law but I can't wait for the Fem Bepo appreciation to start rolling in. He's so cute! Let's talk about Fem Bepo and not the fact that the Heart Pirates are definitely 100% fucked by the foreshadowing here.

Another set, this time of Coby's marine crew and Kizaru's asshole nephew. The marines are paired with the evil pirates they're facing and the civilians they want to save, and Kizaru's nephew is paired with a line of Pacifistas all aiming past him at the viewer. Perhaps showing the difference between them. Coby's crew can distinguish between enemies and allies, the pacifistas see only enemies?

This next set is with three characters. Kizaru, Kuma, and Seraphim Jimbei. They're all following the same movement arc, and from the way Seraphim Jimbei falls into the water, some later frames in the opening, and (manga spoilers), I suspect that these characters *might* not survive. Not completely sure about this cause I don't think Seraphim Jimbei will die too easily, but Kizaru is probably screwed.

Oh yeah, Kizaru's definitely screwed. Anyways, this particular analysis gets into manga spoilers, but I think these frames are about those left behind if I'm right about Kizaru, Seraphim Jimbei, and Kuma not making it thorugh. There's no third character though, so maybe Seraphim Jimbei means something else.

OOOOooooo its the guy Lilith was paired with, sitting behind a really creepy-looking wall with handprints. He looks sinister as FUCK. Can't wait to see what happens here!

This sequence was interesting. It's the Seraphim, being comforted like children. Especially Boa. There's DEFINITELY some symbolism being captured here when Boa looks at the camera, a star drops, and we cut to Luffy. Something tells me that the Seraphim are more human than the Navy would have us believe at first, and maybe Boa's affection for Luffy carries on to her Seraphim self? (hopefully in a non-romantic context cause that'd be weird as fuck).

OOOH BOY A BIG BATCH HERE. I think these are all the fights in the upcoming arc. Luffy rematches with Lucci. Kid battles (Manga Spoilers) (interesting that he's the only one who's deliberately obscured, kinda like how we don't know anything about him really). Law fights Blackbeard. Garp fights Kuzan (which will be interesting since he used to be a marine and now works for blackbeard), and if Zoro's not fighting Seraphim Mihawk I'm gonna eat my shirt.

Now I rarely say this about anime openings, but I think this opening has a theme, and I think it's going to be reflected across the entire egghead arc. "When random contexts / start to make sense on their own" something will happen. These random contexts are all the different fights across this arc, and this opening is deliberately drawing parallels between them. All of these fights are driving towards the same goal, they're all fighting for the same end. They may be separated by space, but they're allied against the same thing. The world is moving and these will be the people who move it forward.

AND APPARENTLY I'VE RUN OUT OF IMAGES I CAN ADD SO GUESS WHAT I'M SPLITTING THIS UP INTO TWO PARTS SURPRISE

[kerberosstyxnixcharonandhydra]

I would wish to see

OK OH LORD THIS IS GONNA BE LONG, some is stuff discussed w/ my pal @idiotv2 and some is just mine (we each have our own versions but there's some stuff shared so!)

without further adieu: These are kinda old lol. I'll be doing an eventual post about their USC interpretations

ALL:

yeah theyre all related in this one.

They're also all italian immigrants!

There is a front related to each one (Charon's Ferry - clothing store | and i cannot remember the others tbh. kerby's was a trampoline park tho. they go feral in there)

ALL SOME FLAVOR OF NB (they/them) and all of them aroace...except hydra who is the token allo /hj

all our cogs have some slight basing on animals so. furries the lot of them (affectionate)

All have some form of bone/joint/frame/shell issues (The head attorney does too) <- that's their Zizi btw (italian gender neutral for aunt/uncle figures)

All lost their shells but in different ways

(Left is relationships, right is an old reference with their shells + my friend's oc joey. hes funney i like him.)

Charon:

the oldest and tallest

got put into a leadership position but would rather not TM

I'm pretty sure that with their shell Charon was considered to be pretty attractive

Wolf based, i believe they're a timberwolf but we may not have been that specific

Our designs and HC's diverge around when they all lose their shells so -- Charon (to me) becomes a spotlight thing

(Based on the light almost looking like a moon and how wolves howl, and them not wanting to be IN the spotlight)

legal surname is Christy

Gorgon thing also, can reflect damage back at you. maybe also turn you to stone if you step into the beam of light and theyre MAD)

SO SCARED OF BUGS THEY CRY AND GAG AND THROW UP IN THEIR MOUTH (i joke but they are terrified)

COFFEE SNOB

Lost shell due to illness (from their Zizi)

Styx:

Second oldest/second tallest

The affair child TM (this is unfortunately true!)

Their animal was a hyena and boy they laugh like one

THEY ARE ALSO A DHAMPIR (male vampire and human woman) or the rough equivalent. the trait of fucked up bones appears in frame issues x2!

used to do ballet for fun in italy, fell and fucked up their foot/leg so bad they had to stop (it also required a transtibal amputation)

they have a wheelchair for bad days, but often use forearm crutches, or a cane + prosthetic (styx and graham and the foreman in the prosthetic legs club)

NO ACCENT BTW. i cannot stress this enough their voice is a dead monotone with no accent or inflection

Surname is Showalter, despite relation to Charon

DOES IN FACT DRINK BLOOD SOMETIMES. and has a life drain ability (i think it should be through their voice and this is my HC list even though i share many w/ my friend)

Showed a few symptoms of the same illness and skipped right to "get this thing off me NOW before it gets worse"

Nix:

The forgotten middle sibling (REAL) who has a passive cheat that makes people unable to sense their presence (They are a cognitohazard)

This can be rectified if you're around them a lot, but it fucks up your brain forever pretty much. They can also amplify the effect to sneak around if they want (but machines like automatic doors and cameras also forget they exist)

Almost perfectly identical to the head attorney, even when they had shells

They use this to fill in for Nyx (originally when Nyx was too ill to work even after using sick days) and they now intend to go to law school

They're why everyone hates lawbots bc they would give fake CnD's and court orders

Weird bird/cat/bat hybrid thing. cat with feathery wings (and they have white patches which are remnants of their freckles)

Surname is Christy

my freak child with an eating disorder (due to derealization and the feeling that "well im not real why bother" yeah cosmos doesnt take kindly to that.)

Weird luck powers. once made buck roll BAR 7 times in a row just by looking at him weird

Also lost shell bc of illness.

Kerberos:

doberman pinscher (parents weren't going to straighten their ears but i assume another family member did under the guise of getting their ears pierced. sickness and despair in the world

SO PROTECTIVE OF HYDRA FOR REASONS THAT ARE SO FUCKED

conspiracy theorist (but not in a fucked up way, in a funny way. like cryptid hunting) (theyre also so oblivious. we had a joke about them asking THE PERSON THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT about... well themself, without knowing)

One time Hydra got dumped on their doorstep at 8 years old and they never got a moment of peace since (they were like idk 10? 11??)

can obtain messages thru electronic signals ("MOOOM THE TV CALLED ME A BITCH AGAIN" "lol youre so imaginative")

Surname is Showalter

GOT HIT BY A TRAIN AND THEIR SHELL BROKE APART

HYDRA:

IDIOT BLACK CAT ENERGY

The shortest and youngest, but oh so feral

talked to god once we dont need to focus on that

IMMIGRATED ON ACCIDENT I CANT STRESS THAT ENOUGH

kind of a brat but in a PTSD way (neglectful/abusive parents)

"mommy why do you have beef with me im 4"

had 2 imaginary friends growing up, a greek fish who's name translated to Jabberwocky, and a talking house (both are in fact real dw about)

their parents didnt wanna immigrate but they were 8 and didnt understand so after a tantrum their parents packed a suitcase and dropped them with kerberos

they also didnt get a chance to learn english for for like the first few months they only spoke italian (and some greek)

vessel of fate sort of.

Surname is... well they legally changed their name to be.... hydra Hydra. after the mario movie (the live action one) where mario's surname is also mario. theyre wacky.

lost their shell in a drunk driving accident (the designated driver was drunk and drove them right into another car head on)

anyways have some funneys

[keisgellesnwmn]

Going back to May 2020 at the moment where both of my grandparent died due to covid-19. After that, my life started to twist into a new chapter. My parents started fighting over unnecessary reasons. I am very thankful that every time I am out of the blue, there is someone who will lend an ear. In times of taking the hard road. I am optimistic that I can fight every battle I am facing in. After years, the time has come, the deafening silence of the night surprised me, while I am straightening my two curly wigs using my hands, my eyes are melting when I heard the news that a virus called COVID-19 has fully attacked our country. The land of resilient people becomes silent and noisier at poverty.

A few weeks of happiness, the light, and the pillar of our family are slowly turning into stress and sadness. The carpet of new normal started to roll. I started to attend an online class. In my first take, it wasn't difficult for me because we have gadgets and an internet connection. The week passed by and the poverty level down fast. The angelic face of my parents turns into an angry beast. They started to fight through punching bag words. I was thinking, why is this happening to my family. I find solutions to lessen the level of stress in our family. After the unstoppable war about money, my parents choose not to talk to each other. The gravity of emotions that I am carrying at that time cannot describe by words.

One day while I am in the middle of my online class, I heard some noises outside. I know my parents are arguing again. I muted my microphone, and I smiled at the camera while my teacher is teaching. When I heard my mother is crying, I left the online class (pretending that I lost my internet connection). I went outside to look at my mother then I see both. The sunny day faded and became shady. I was looking at my mother's eyes. I asked. I was speechlessly crying, when I heard what it is, why this is happening in our family, I said. Why did he do this to us, especially to you, mom? I spoke. I ate the words that I said before. I became depressed at that time because he continued his unpleasant habits even if we are in a tricky situation. I am just praying for my family's safety and happiness, especially for my mother. Today I have forgiven my father. I realized that even those things happened, I still have my father and my family. We did not became broke.

Months passed by I started having social anxiety, and to be honest the lock down a year ago made me feel good. I hate being with people and knowing that we are in a face to face set up, I must interact with people and deal with them. As days goes by, everything feels like it is going through how I like it, the lockdown extended, it was not good but for me who has social anxiety, I couldn't feel any better, but as the lockdown extends, I started missing my life, my life outside my room, I missed my friends, the people around me, which is weird , for I have a social anxiety.

It was all bearable, not until the lockdown lasted months already, breakdowns, I have no one to talk to.

That's when I realized that No man is an island, we need each other to survive, we need each other's presence. So, I gathered up all my strength, and communicate with everyone I know, and as they reply, I felt my heart warm, and realized, if it was not for them, I will not really survive.

After that I lived a very solitary life. My mother was usually gone at work, my brother would devote himself to his own activities, and there I was.

I remember I would sit outside of my home and pretend to be a rock, because rocks did not feel anything and they certainly won't cry. They were indestructible, I thought. But last summer when I spent some time alone and tried to improve my own self with all the things I wanted to learn, learning how to be alone (not lonely), I realized it is one of the most important times when you realize that you can be on your own and get your life together. It is known I realize how important was that time for me to grow.

I am not sure what exactly you are going through but try to take some actions, independent of what others around you are doing, read books, go to coffee shops meet new people, try to make some goals, and achieve them. I promise within a few weeks you would start enjoying your solitude!

[watching-constellations]

This post is a really good reminder for me. I'm scared of big, huge memory loss because I watched my grandmother die of Alzheimer's. It was awful. It took over ten years, and it colored my entire childhood. To this day, I obsess over death, dying, and my mortality, because I know that my end may not come with any grace.

I've also already experienced severe memory loss. I am twenty-three. There is roughly a year of my adult life that I do not remember much of, and another year that's extremely fuzzy. I remember the edges, but I don't have a few months out of the middle at all. To this day, I don't really know what caused it. But, before the memory loss, I was in a healthy relationship (we were moving in together), I had my horse boarded at one specific barn, and I was starting my sophomore year of college. I know some of what happened during this year, but mostly from my camera roll and what I've been told by other people.

When I started remembering things again, I was on the verge of breaking up with my partner with no hope of recovery (I don't know why), my horse was at a completely different barn (I don't know when or how that happened), and I'd written an entire book (I have a memory of sitting down at my computer and typing a line or two— absolutely nothing else. The book is actually pretty good). I have no idea what happened to me during that time. All I know is that when I came to, if you can call it that, I was confused, terrified, and dazed. It felt like I'd been knocked unconscious and dropped off at a bus stop in a city on the other side of the world. My memory didn't start working like it used to for probably another year. Even now, I'm not sure if I'm all the way back to how I used to be. I tell myself that I am because that's easier, but on some days, I can feel that I'm not.

Thinking about returning to that state of total blankness and finding my life in a totally different place than where I left it scares me so much. I think mostly, it's the fact that I lost someone who I loved deeply that disturbs me. We were planning to get married. People still get upset with me nowadays for the things I allegedly did (and cannot remember at all) during this period of my life. Now, sometimes I isolate because it's hard for me to get close to people and learn new things, because I always carry this ice cold terror that it's going to go away, and there will be nothing I can do about it. Sometimes I do the opposite, and I live so fast and feverishly that I drive myself to illness and injury because I'm worried it'll all slip away from me in a blink. I fear that my memory loss makes me bad or crazy, and that nobody will stick with me through it if it happens again. It feels like a personal failing or irreparable and unforgivable problem because I'm so young. I don't trust anyone to be with me if I forget everything, and I don't trust myself to behave the way I want to if I'm not all the way here.

But hey, memory loss isn't actually the end, is it? I'm still here, and you're still here. I still have a lot of living left to do. There doesn't need to be a huge, terrible stigma around memory loss. I actually do still deserve to live a full life, huh? And maybe it's really not my fault that this has happened to me, and probably will again someday. Maybe I couldn't help it. Maybe everything is fine. So anyway, thank you for this. It's a good one.

Also, wow. I just realized how hard on myself I've been lately, because I'm already twenty-three, and I should be doing more, and... I'm missing a solid 1-2 years of my adult life. Apparently I need to give myself a little credit.

seeing people my age talk about how scared they are of memory loss, which they only associate with old age, is so surreal to see as a 24 year old who has actively experienced memory loss for a long time now

there are causes for memory loss besides dementia and alzheimer’s, i hope y’all know that. dissociative disorders, trauma, brain injuries, thyroid problems, even just stress and lack of sleep can fuck up your ability to store, process, and access memory. and that’s just a few of the many causes i can think of off the top of my head right now.

please stop treating disabled people like some scary “other” that you might become only in the distant, decades-away future. we are your age, too. you may become one of us sooner than you know. stop acting like memory loss marks the end of a life, when so many of us have so much living left to do!

[parasocial12]

But I'm a Creep, I'm a Weirdo

[transcribed from memo book] 26/2 Today my mother went to the appt. I set up for her to check her blood pressure. Sister went with her. Despite that, my sister and I still went tot he gym early in the morning. It was leg day. Bully. In my ineptitude I ended up missing the bus by 3 minutes, leading me to head to school entirely by car. What a waste of gas and parking! 20$ minimum for two classes today- ai ya ya! I missed the roll call for my Sowjet course. Alls well tho cause I was still counted as present. Gut. During Sowjet, I ended up winning at solitaire (hard mode!). what a feat! Now, I sit in the Red Room. Already, I've eaten my lunch- McDs per usual. My Spirits today have gone high and low. On the car ride I was on the verge of suicide. Recently, right after Sowjet, I was ecstatic. Listening to the Maladroit CD, I can't help but feel a yearn for Love. "If I only once could kiss you". Of course, I know how silly and delusional it is of me to think such romantic notions. Foolish! Yet, this longing fills me not with despair, but w/ hope. It must be the work of Burndt Jamb. ~~~~ Seated across from me is a gal. I've already stolen too many glances of her. Even so, I find it difficult to describe her. She's a variety of blonde or at least a brunette with blonde highlights(?). She was a wore a white tank top and blue jumper pants(?)[AN:I know nothing of fashion] with white New Balances with pink accents. Cute! She stared at me first- most likely due to the stickers on my laptop- anime mostly. Slice of Life stuff. Anyways, why cat I spell today!!! Annoying. ANyways, I ended up stealing a few glances her way. Her laptop was filled with stickers too. A lot of variety, but the one that struck out to me is that she had a semi-vulgar anime sticker with a barely clad gal w/ the word "Spank!" or something to that effect. It's most strange and aroused such curiosity that I ended up having eye contact w/ her. How creepy of me! It was but for a moment, but now I am shamed and do everything in my power to avoid seeming like I'm looking at her. How stressful. Oh God, what if she posts about me saying I'm a Creep! Ahh my social life, though nonexistent, is ruined! I would have loved to know her name at least! Oh woe am I! How silly and foolish I am. I am sure she knows I write now in this pocket book. I wonder if she knows that I write of her. Oh fair maiden! I avert my gaze in shame! She's curled up like a kitten- on her phone. Cute, I think. I can't really take the time to note any details. The piano guy is playing Part of Your World. Pinkerton plays in my ears. Longing in my Heart. How I wish I could go up to her! I prob don't even exist to her. Many times I wish I could take a snapshot picture of what I see with my eyes. Some beauty cannot be captured by the limited capacity of mechanical camera or the brush of an artist. No. Reality displays a beauty [greater than] anything Man can conjure. If I could just steal another long glance to remember. Damn, what a Creep I am! I hope see why I'm single, and most likely single remain.

[Author's Note: I can barely recall the girl mentioned in this entry- I would have forgotten her if not written lol! Rereading in a regular state, I see very well how creepy I make it sound with what I write, hell, I even acknowledge it in my writing itself, but in reality it was not so weird! Trust!]

[youmeandourdragonseeds]

I watch them and tear up myself. Maybe I should… I should reach out. Try something.

It takes me a full month to reach out to my boys, a month that I’m still avoiding Anakin for.

I leave a letter on the table addressed to Valko with Hunter in parentheses.

Valko,

Forgive me, this will be short. I don’t really know what to say. I am not good with words.

I miss you. More than life. More than air. I wish I could’ve been there every step of the way with you. I have so many questions and I just replay them over and over again. How is your shifting? Have you grown to like vegetables? Are you and Argenis still close? Do you remember me?

You were six when they took you. You and your brothers. My babies. I want you to know it was not my choice. The scars I have from that fight are the deepest on my body. I fought for you with everything I had. But when it came down to it, I couldn’t accidentally hurt you. And I lost. I am sorry. So sorry.

I miss your little purrs and your growls. I know you aren’t that little boy anymore but I hope you let yourself be who you are. My little wolf.

I hope you’ve enjoyed the snacks I’ve been leaving you, and before you even try to check, yes I deleted the camera footage from the Temple records.

I’d leave a letter for each of you but I truly just can’t imagine you all would be interested. But I just had to let you know that I wanted you. I always wanted you. I’m sorry you grew up in that place. I tried so hard.

I see you in the news and read about you in articles and I cannot express how overcome I am with pride for you. I am so proud of you, Valko. Every day. Every minute.

I’ll always love you and I hope you have a good life. I’m sorry I cannot be in it.

With as much love as there is in my heart,

Mama

The next time Hunter enters that room is after a long day of training, wishing with every muscle in his body that maybe something else will be here waiting for him.

And there is. A handwritten letter- with his name on it.

“Valko,” he whispers, several images flashing across the page as your voice rings gently in his ear. Valko! Where are you sweetheart?

He lets out a quiet stunned noise and stands frozen in place, reading over the letter.

About halfway through, he races to the door and slams it shut, leaning against it to read the rest in secured privacy.

Once he’s finished the letter, the tears start to roll, and he begins pacing around the room with the paper in his shaking hands.

They… they took him… from his mother. They took Crosshair from their mother. Took all his brothers. Every single one of them has gone through so much-did they even need to? Could they have had a better life?

He lets out a whine that turns into a sob and he looks back down at the paper, starting to pace faster as he reads it again.

Where are you? Who are you? Why won’t you visit him or… or say something to him? All this time he’s had so many unanswered questions, and now he has even more.

[onyourhyuck]

[ 3:00 AM ]

prologue- “How about you sit and look pretty for me instead.” + “Maybe…support me underneath and i might win.”

tw- gamer hyuck! x bored girlfriend y/n. established relationship. fluff. suggestive (extremely suggestive). Ahem y/n is terrible at gaming 🥲

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You never felt so bored in your life. Usually you’d have something entertaining you, wether that would be your phone, watching kdramas alone or simply having someone next to you to chat with.

Now you don’t have any of those. Your body feels so active and in need to burn energy. Your brain was running a whole ted talk to yourself because you really had no one to speak with currently.

Thing is you could have someone to speak with, if he wasn’t so damn busy playing overwatch.

Your boyfriend Haechan is a gamer, there was no denying that his hobby was games. His love for games was pulsing high and the passion to win drove him crazy. he was naturally competitive, so playing such high risk games was perfect for him and his mischievous sly demure. He heard you whine, calling him for about the hundredth time in over an hour.

But he would rather focus on the intense battle happening right on the front screen, as if it was brainwashing him to never look away despite the fact that you were a literal magnet to pull him away from anything and fully turn his attention to you.

“Hyuck please I’m so bored, at least let me join your game so I can play with you.”

You slur hanging your head over your shared bed’s edge, rolling from the left to the right in driving motion. haechan pulls down his headphone sets, swirling his head to look at you laying on your stomach with your head lifting to stare back.

“You can’t join the game, y/n.” He puts back on the headphone sets with the game noises running through very muffle, the boy simply goes back to playing. You groan loudly.

“Why can’t i play with you?” You would ask again, standing up. You slowly approach your boyfriend’s chair from behind and wrap arms round him where your head is lurking behind his soft locks. Your nostrils start to flare, inhaling his scent, shampoo he uses on his beautiful dyed hair.

it was probably one of your favourite scents that you wish you could smell forever. You’d wish this was the smell of the oxygen you breathe in. He was your oxygen intake.

“Don’t you remember what happened the last time i let you play on my team?” he softly trails warningly as his eyes never left the pc screen. you murmur softly into his neck. “No…”

little did you know you were very much aware of what you did. But in your defence, it wasn’t your fault! He lightly scoffs.

“You killed me thinking I was the enemy y/n…with a grenade.”

You shiver in embarrassment as you whine again, replaying flashbacks of the moment that happened not too long ago. You joined the boys in another game and your boyfriend promised to teach you how to use ever weapon and defend yourself, but when he was teaching you, you happened to be distracted with a green icon that was the grenade leading hyuck to his death doom.

And ever since then he vows to never let you play with games that at least involve fighting and grenades. He was caught by surprise too and he was obviously a bit upset, in the end you did make him lose the important HP levels he was close to levelling up a grade of his avatar.

Moreover, the dreamies teased haechan because of his reaction. it was quite funny, hearing him go suddenly really silent and blinking in the camera. Watching all the stages of grief.

“But- i, okay personally that was my first time playing that game.”

“That hurt my feelings though. So no, you cannot play with me. Plus I already have my teammates baby.” Hyuck shot. He felt you move away from his body as you crawl and sit on his lap where he sat on the comfortable gaming chair with red and black colour scheme, perfectly matching with his hair. He didn’t react much, but you felt a slight stiff air in his chest when he felt you curl on his lap and rest your beautiful endearing face on his chest.

You were like a prying predator watching him like he was your dinner. In all honesty you don’t need much attention, as long as he’s close to you. Haechan doesn’t need to be speaking to you, touching you, he wouldn’t even need to be a massive attentive seeker for you. You felt entertained and much better on his lap sitting there doing nothing but just…

Watching him. As if he was the most interesting, fascinating and extraordinary thing you ever laid your eyes.

He flashes you a gentle smile finally acknowledging your presence as he may have realised he was a bit harsh earlier, though that was because you distracted him. But he can’t blame you for his little mean words. Your boyfriend wraps arms around you, embracing you as he kisses your forehead.

“Hmm I’m sorry. Jeno and Jaemin took your place in the game already. But how about you sit and look pretty for me instead?”

“I reckon this is so much better than being on my team.”

your ears perk at the rasp deep voice. Usually this was the voice only he would use around you, his natural speaking voice where he doesn’t need to put up a front image for other people. Sometimes the other dreamies would hear it, but mostly, it was just you.

You hum against the sweet lingering forehead kiss, whispering. “Shouldn’t i at least support you in some way that you win the game?”

In many ways you still want to partake in his hobby to maybe even bond with him a little more. Your boyfriend lightly smirks watching down at you, he leans closer hovering over your lips as his thumb brushed past the chin lifting you to face him. You were so helplessly under his sly fox charm.

He feels your lips seal tight, eyeing him up and down until they lay on his heartshape lips. You knew he was having an idea strike him faster than lightning ever could, in his eyes there was a dangerous spark of fire burning in it, watching you as he was going to reveal his perfect definition of what you could do to help.

“Maybe…support me underneath and i might win.”

He leans closer bringing a loving kiss, feeling the way your smile forms in the kiss. He breaks apart quick, when his two friends speaking through the headphone sets; jeno and jaemin, unmute to bring haechan back to start the next round game.

But before he unmutes himself to get back on the gaming grind. He needs a little boost from you. If you know what I mean…

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

@onyourhyuck please refer from translating, copyrighting and plagiarising my work thank youu <3 reblog this fic and follow me for more updates bc it helps a girl out a ton!

[tomrrowforyou]

errmyknee-wonwon:

Sorry for the small delay in getting part three out, I try to write quick and get one post out every day but I’ve been very busy (with school starting up soon and working at the same time). But all that aside, I’m ready to fulfill your cravings for more Rupert and Emma goodness! In part two, I discussed the chemistry between the pair off-screen. Now I’ll go into my observations about their chemistry onscreen and explain how this all the more contributes to their relationship.

Some critics of the Rupert/Emma relationship may be thinking, “What? On-screen chemistry? Of course they’ll have on-screen chemistry, their characters are in love! It’s called acting.” And while I’m a “Ron and Hermione until the day I fall over to my grave” type of fan, yes, I’m aware that they’re automatically going to have some sort of spark on-screen because their characters are destined lovers, but once again I must bring up the whole Harry/Ginny, Dan/Bonnie matter. No chemistry WHATSOEVER! I think both of the actors are gorgeous but together, they just look.. awkward. Also, like I’ve stated before, I was disappointed that there was not enough emotional connection between Harry and Ginny to make their relationship look geniune on screen (but that’s a whole other topic). Rupert and Emma however, look great together (which I admit is a matter of opinion), but it is undeniable that their dynamic throughout the whole series was much deeper and real…

..SO real actually to the point that sometimes, I can’t distinguish whether they are really acting or it’s something that comes natural. Remember in part two that I noted the fact that playing the same character for a chunk of your life starts to blur the lines between acting and reality. Take for instance, the DVD scene of Ron and Hermione skipping stones on the water. The dialogue was COMPLETELY off the norm for both characters, and it was beyond obvious that it was just Emma and Rupert playing themselves. Emma asks Rupert, after initially showing her the proper technique of throwing the stone, asks him, “So what, kind of like, *throws stone* that?” Forgive me but I can’t imagine Hermione talking in that manner. The scene is beautiful though because it just so believable.

Also, another scene I can think of that seems very natural between the two characters was in the fourth movie, when they were talking to Harry about kissing Cho Chang. The way Rupert looks at Emma and the way he talks to her seems like he’s just normally talking with her while the cameras are rolling; another precious moment! But I think the big moment between these two that touched the world was of course, the laugh they shared after their kiss.

“What’s lovely is the part after they break up and start laughing, I can see that it’s just Rupert and Emma,” says Dan.

“Rupert and I put in this nice laugh they have because it almost seems ridiculous that it hasn’t happened sooner. But when it happens it feels so right that it’s almost like, ‘why didn’t we do this years ago? We are so silly,” says Emma.

Need I say anything more? The whole production obviously couldn’t get enough of how real their reactions were after the kiss; I’m sure the editors decided to keep it in the film as well to show how in love these two really are (and to possibly hint on an attraction between Rupert and Emma). From the looks of it, it seems that Emma’s childish laugh indicated that she was very embarrassed and just had her walls completely come down on her; and Rupert’s soft laugh was that of adoration, as if he was thinking, “I just kissed my best friend, and I loved it. I love her.” (As cheesy as it sounds, put it together with how he’s looking at her.. I know you’ll agree!).

I also want to discuss the scene in Deathly Hallows Part 1 when Ron is giving his speech to Hermione. Emma was obviously thrilled about his “acting” and said that it was so real that she could see how much he loved Hermione. Seeing as to how Rupert cannot distinguish between Hermione and Emma in the first place, it’s obvious that his acting came from a real place in his heart, and that’s why it was just so touching and believable.

That wraps up part three, and in the next post I’ll be wrapping up my whole analysis, touching on topics such as other relationships that the pair had and why it’s important, and also the reason why they just haven’t gotten together.. YET. Haha. Stay tuned everybody :)

Analyzing Rupert and Emma's Relationship, Part Three

[tellmethisisnottumblisnextfuckup]

Hello I’m a Larry but I feel like they broke up a couple of years ago. I’ll also say I’m more of a Harrie and his music makes me believe he’s been in other relationships. But I’m also willing to be convinced otherwise!! The hopeless romantic in me wants to believe in the strength of their love so I guess my question is what evidence have you gathered that makes you believe they’re still together even now? I know this might be a lot to ask. Thanks in advance !!!

I’m this close to grabbing a digital pen and correct Larry to Larrie. (Did you know it’s one of the signs of having trolls in the dungeon)

Anyway. I do want to answer.

Life. Dear anon. It’s life that taught me everything. Do tell me when you time their break up - because I’ve been here since more than “a couple of years ago” - i know it’s super easy to throw this sentence - but you’re telling this to someone who has been here lol - and I wasn’t in my diapers on the playground when these 2 fell in love. So when do you time their break up? Because you know they’ve lived half their lives in the spotlight, in this industry and time and time again -let’s just say day-by-day week-by-week only proved the immense respect, and love they feel for each other. We’ve had these naysayers like you in the years, so this is nothing new but you know what? None of you are ever able to point out a period which proves that these 2 have broken up.

This is not a movie or high school. They have fought tooth and nail for their love, for their freedom, they “hid” it when they had to, but even then- jeez it gives me chills to remember all those moments- even then an eye movement, a caring look, a hidden touch, the other’s reaction- it just gave it away. And not to mention how fucking obvious they were when they didn’t hide it and just let it all out.

Life. Because I happen to be in a loving and supportive relationship since 2007. Because love isn’t a break up - getting together- break up- getting together spiral. Love is about trust, and respect, and growing together, being better together, finding your best friend in the other, it’s about fighting for what you two have together. That’s what they did when they were babies - fighting w modest, sony, whatever you want to add here. They don’t need to fight though because as soon as the cameras stop rolling they’re an out-couple to the surprise of no-one in this industry.

Life because we have 5 people in the same band and always these 2 seem to be so goddamn unlucky to share clothes ON A CONSTANT (to be PC), who finish each other’s sentences, who when even making eye contact making the other 3 look aside to their handlers with a pale face, always these 2 who in the band disappeared at the same time, who even AFTER 1D were still disappearing from the globe at the same time and reappearing at the same time, who had to have 235 stunts running at the same time to make them straight otherwise if you strip these stunts down all you have is two singers w constant denial of their sexuality. (Remember what Sir Elton John said..), it’s only these 2 whose teams work still to this day to make you and others believe H and L aren’t even in the same continent because god save them from cutting all their record incomes.

Life. Because WHY. You cannot explain why this happened in 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014 (you’re damn right I’ll type all the years out), 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021 and keeps happening in 2022 spring- summer.

Life. Because you learn what is THE LOOK. What it means that “when you know you know”. Because you learn that 16 year olds don’t just utter things out like always and moving in together and home. Because it IS possible to be and still be with your first love.

Life. Because relationships do not have an expiration date, because it can happen, because it does happen. Because those looks and touches were the very thing that drew me here in the first place and you cannot fake this shit.

Life. Because you can be w your SO together for years and they’d still say they’re not willing to have ONE innocent couple tattoo.

Life. Because celebrities lie. Money talks. Paps are paid. This industry is homophobic. Media shows what is paid for. What you see - they want you to see that.

Life. Because you learn to look at what you’re not shown, what you’re not told.

Life. Because in the 242 million pregnancies people have a year, they DO show at 8 months. 🙃

And finally: Because they’ve come so far from Princess Park and that lyric fits no one and he’s a habit that he CAN’T BREAK and he’s happy to shout this out every night to his fans anon.

Life. Because the strength of these words, all their goddamn lyrics goes deep in your heart and you know it’s not just some cheap 1000 words Y/N on goddamn wattpad.

Have a nice Saturday anon! 💚💙