#for some reason i don't actually care?? i might fail two subjects and yet i just can't seem to focus on it.......

[t4tbedehopmar]

hello tumblr *flops over and dies*

[siren-sashimi]

More ideas for a marquis fanfic (tryna keep it unique, lol)

1: what if the reader was a civilian trying to find her brother (who she doesn’t know was in the assassin world and was killed) and while investigating crosses paths with the marquis?

2: reader is pregnant and dealing with cravings. A cute fluffy fic

3: reader owns a pastry shop the marquis is a patron at.

4: the reader tries to leave the marquis because they can’t take the relationship (maybe the danger that comes with the marquis or he’s too controlling) and he stops the reader before they can leave Paris (can be cute or dark, your choice)

5: aside from romantic relationships, what would it be like being the sibling of the marquis?

Hey, hey anon! Glad to hear from you once more. ^^ There's no pressure for you to be unique, if you feel like chatting about le connard du jour, my inbox is all but ready. :D

Hmm, I wouldn't have any ideas yet but if any other writer finds it appealing, feel free to make something wonderful with the dear anon's prompt. I'm mostly hesistant because Vincent moves on a very specific place of a secret parallel world, extra layer of filthy stinking wealth, making his crossing towards civilian life a bit harder, and him getting interested by accident is a bit harder for me to imagine. There must be something intriguing in the other for him to get interested, let alone care; in my mind at least.

I don't know if I'm any good at fluff, especially since I think the topic of children is an extremely touchy subject in the fickle world of assassins. But when it comes to food topics...

...you're in luck. Recently I read the mad genius food porn "Butter" by Yuzuki Asako in which food is layered with social commentary, thought about the self, lust for joy, lust for life, gender dynamics, worth by looks. (If the story sounds interesting to you, I highly recommend giving it a try. It was like a literary banquet to me.) Meaning I'm extremely open to the idea of sensuality expressed in the joys of food, extremely well made food. Here, another snippet you inspired me to write, thank you. (x) (btw, this was the reason the reply comes in that late... Sorry, I got very carried away with entire chapter outlines because I'd so many ideas for the meals that could be served. If anyone's interested I might put up as well.)

Oh gosh this can only go terribly bad... I'm pretty certain that Vincent, especially when he made it into the position of a Marquis, would be unbearably egocentric. Which means he wouldn't understand why he isn't all one could wish for. At all. There're already two such scenarios out there but I'm dabbling in an outline. Note that in the movie Vincent might be way too sure that his plans suceed with his methods. Still, like when he noticed sending the entire Parisian underworld after John Wick failed, he doesn't delude himself thinking he might still suceed. He just desperately throws more money at the problem. So I don't think that he's an unrealistic person yet one who's too used to getting what he wants, and not exactly good at fine methods. If that's his way to solve problems... oh boy...

Before we start I would like to preface that I like to use Skarsgård's idea of the Marquis coming from an impoverished background who has made it to the top. In can the relationship going two ways a) The siblings never really got along, chose different paths in life, and barely see each other. They might meet at funerals or weddings but only if Vincent can make it, by now the sibling isn't counting on him anymore actually. Not without a tinge of bitterness that remains in the mouth for longer than expected... Sometimes Vincent drops by randomly; less out of affection but more because he needs a hideaway after getting into trouble. When his sibling is in need of money or get their first child an anonymous deposit lands on their bankaccount with some more poetic variation of "thanks for letting me crash on your couch". Still, no noticable affections, no frequent, let alone scheduled visits... b) Co-dependent, verging on unhealthy. cw: emotionally difficult relationship, threats, emotional blackmailing, unhealthy sibling dynamic From the two of them, Vincent is the highly ambitious one to make it out of his life. Violence, lying, backstabbing, force are all fair means to his end. The only actual affection he has, the only one sparking humane feelings is for his sibling. In his egoism and strong drive, Vincent is the more dominant one. Even if the other sibling doesn't have a meek personality, they know at some point that they'll always find themselves in the wash of their driven sibling. Vincent will drag them with them to a better life. And Vincent needs his sibling. The only person he can trust, he knows will never betray or pose a threat to him. Maybe he will allow them to life their own life albeit be it in his design. Him being always close enough to receive comfort, encouragement, and a hideaway when needed. Their siblings knows a lot of disturbing stuff Vincent did to make it this far... It's upsetting, he did so much for them. They can't out a single sound to no one. Oh, if the sibling ever wants to make decisions causing Vincent to worry if they would prioritize affection for some else but him, he can get mean, frantic, even vaguely threatening to take the sibling's life style comfort away like cutting money for higher education, making it impossible to find a new place to rent or buy, get them fired. (Let's just say, dating includes the partner desperately needing Vincent's approval. If the reader ever wants to gets kids, they should urgently plan out an entire strategy how to slowly selling Vincent on the idea of becoming an uncle, and how of course he would be the most involved uncle of them all.) Then there's also the aspect that Vincent is a man envied by many. He might use them as pawn or bait with or without his sibling's knowledge. By times the sibling has to interrupt their own life because they're in danger from Vincent's enemies - again and again.... The worst is, Vincent is too headstrong to admit to his wrongs. He even justifies it that so much he did is for them too. But the reader lives well, they're happy they're out of their birthplace. A calm home, maybe a little garden, a fulfilling job, some holidays, a good life, that's all. They don't want more, why does Vincent act as if he needed to do all of that for more, more, and more his own sibling neither wants or needs? As much as they love him, in the end the only end to his means is Vincent himself.

[rui-drawsbox]

Hi its me again (the one who had the nazuna idea) and I kinda wanted to build on it, I'd it's ok with you.

I think in the season finale when Knights and Shu have one last battle the Knights start losing really badly, maybe due to new models of the dolls? But in the end when it seems that it might be over for the Knights, Mika (who wasn't present for the first part of the battle) shows up to the fight and yells, very confidently something like "I BROUGHT HELP" and it's Nazuna, in his old Valkyrie outfit and whatever weapon he has, and he uses smth like healing magic on the Knights and starts helping them defeat Shu.

I think he would also be one of those side characters that show up every episode being really creepy and watching the Knights (they don't notice ofc) but he starts showing up more when Mika starts his redemption, like in the background comforting him or smth. I think he'd even drop little clues around for the Knights to realise who Shu and Mika were.

I also kind of wanted to talk about the Knights getting their powers, but if you already have an idea then that's great!

I think there was another posts detailing what would happen in the first and second episodes, but I think that much like other precure shows (my main reference is glitter force) for the first 5-6 episodes it's each of the main cast getting their powers. So Arashi gets hers from the cat first, right?

I think Arashi's cat should show up each episode to give one of the gang the brush, eventually giving one to Mika too maybe.

First Leo and Ritsu get theirs, for obvious reasons and being present for the first battle.

Then I think Tsukasa would be next, he's pretty skeptical about it at first but after witnessing them fighting he decides to confront them and join the gang properly.

Then it's Izumi, much like other magical girl shows the last character is hardest to get involved. I think he would have the situation explained to him but still refuse bc he's busy (maybe he didn't want to potentially endanger people like Makoto or thinks he's not "good" enough for the magical Knights. It takes a lot of convincing but they get there eventually.

Also consider: Shu calling in Double Face to take care of the Knights for like an episode or two after Mika leaves (but that may contradict some stuff, it's not like all the antagonists need to be magical, the may just detective their way through it)

Ty for listening to my ramble, you're genuinely a genius, 7 school subjects be damned

hiii! hellooo!! wb nazunanon (they're referring to this post where we discussed about Nazuna in the Au for the first time btw!)

also i belive an epic battle like that would be a perfect finale for the series, yet, i fail to see Nazuna actually fighting? like, mabye he can be the ultimate support or smth--

More like he and Mika were built (or trained, idk what they are at this point) to fight as a duo, Mika fighting always in the front and Nazuna supporting behind/making long distance attacks to overwhelm the enemy on every possible way

im thinking about hsr class system ngl, smtsmth Nazuna being harmony/nihility smthsmth Mika being the hunt smthsmth Arashi as destruction bc is very versatile... and Izumi/hunt, Leo/erudition, Tsukasa/preservation and Ritsu and Shu as nihility...

now forgive me but when you said "side characters that show up every episode being really creepy" i couldnt help but think about this creepy guy from spiderverse that is always looking right at the camera

is rlly funny but yeah i get your point, it would be like that one side character that suddenly gets the spotlight in the series and when you look back it is a "i was always there" situation (and watchers would go wow they had it prepared from the start!)

also i belive you got the order for each knight perfectly! Leo would be so excited to get his powers and be able to help his friends and Ritsu would probably be "sounds like a pain but i'll do it for Nacchan" (ooc here idk him a lot) + Tsukasa and Izumi being the last ones to get their powers sounds so canon for some reason, its TokyoMewMew speaking in the back of my mind i think

NOW are you telling me that there's a possibility of magical cowboy mama...?

jk(unless) if double face is involved in some way i would think about them being a "detective club" where Shu goes as a desperate move after losing Mika, instead of magical minions/boys. Still, mabye there's a chance of a spinoff for every unit in enstars and how they become magical girls lol (imagine magical Akatsuki lmao)

now yeah, thats all my ramblings for today! this really got me thinking about Nazuna's weapon lol, i really can't think of anything that fits exvalkyrie aesthetic while being functional and meaningful,,,,, do you think healing powers are too op? i feel like it would be a little unfair,,,,

[pureamericanism]

Addressing controversial topics with subtlety and nuance without resorting to fence-sitting is a difficult thing to do, so I've thought for a long while about how I'd word this post so it would actually reach people. I'm fairly sure it'll fail, but I'm tired of mistaking my own confused silence for cowardice.

So, how about that culture war, huh? Pretty wild stuff, innit? For example, I had thought that there was a pretty vast space for productive compromise in between "men should be banned from wearing kilts on the grounds of sexual immorality" and "pushing pro-sterilization propaganda on children from the age of 4 onwards from every available uncensored platform is fucking awesome, actually," but it seems in the current state of things that's not the case. It's either one extreme or the other. Indeed, that dichotomy forms a depressingly thorough scissor statement for much of our terminally online class.

Including myself, of course. For my part, even though I regularly wear a kilt on formal occasions - including for my own wedding - I would much, much rather have to quietly hush up that fact, deleting all pictures thereof and having A Word with my friends and relations, than have my nieces, nephews, and my own (future) children subject to non-stop pro-sterilization propaganda from their teachers, media heroes, etc. And it isn't even close. In fact, the idea that someone might hold the opposite point of view seems to me as obviously, transparently abhorrent as the parenting practices of Walter Breen.

And yet, many of the people I follow here on tumblr seem to hold that opposite perspective. I won't call my mutuals 'friends' - I don't personally hold with having friends that I've never met in person - but you're all people who, if I heard you'd suddenly died, I'd feel really quite sad for a good long while. You post interesting, insightful things, sometimes things I already agree with, sometimes things I find novel and interesting, and sometimes things I heartily disagree with. Whichever way, though, they're things I find interesting and am glad to read. But there's some of you who seem to hold quite the opposite opinion as me on this scissor statement, who think 'banning men from wearing kilts' to be the greater of two evils here, and who don't seem to be afraid of proclaiming that fact.

I don't know what to make of this fact. I've always thought of rationality as the only arbiter of judgement that we can possibly rely on, and so I can think of various arguments in favor of my opinion, but I can't imagine they would actually persuade anyone who disagrees. There are a lot of moral, ethical, and political questions where I can imagine close, scientific reasoning would persuade me, but...well, as I said above, I view my opponents' position as being morally equivalent to advocating for Walter Breen's systematic sexual abuse and exploitation of his pre-pubescent children over the course of many years, and I can't imagine any possible argument that would persuade me that that's fine and dandy.

And yet, many of the people who seem to espouse this horrifying position seem otherwise to be sensitive, caring and intelligent people. What is one to make of this? Is morality really completely, entirely, 100% arbitrary? If it's this arbitrary, that there can be no common ground on such fundamental questions as this, then I find it hard to avoid agreeing with the poet that "if we knew what we are, we should do as Sir Arthur Jermyn did; and Arthur Jermyn soaked himself in oil and set fire to his clothing one night." I don't know.

I'll confess that my secret hope in writing this is that one of my mutuals who falls on the other side of this scissor statement from me will read my framing of the issue - "massive, government-sponsored pro-child-sterilization propaganda" - and come to the slow, belated realization that they've been wrong the whole time. But, realistically, I don't have much hope that'll happen. After all, I've seen the other side frame the debate in equally apocalyptic terms - "trans genocide!," an' a' tha' - for years, and it's failed to move me even the slightest amount. Frankly, I'll be surprised if any of the people I'd be happiest to persuade have even read this far. Reading an effortpost can take a lot of effort, after all, and most especially when it disagrees with you.

Still, I would like to extend a hand to all of you awful, reprehensible, and yet somehow morally decent people. As I said in the very first paragraph, even though I find your moral priors horrible beyond measure in ways that shake my belief in the very idea of a common morality to the core, I still think there's a really vast space for compromise. Surely we can all agree that it's perfectly fine for men to wear dresses and eyeliner, and for women to drive motorcycles and chew Copenhagen, and that it's also probably a bad idea for 3rd-grade teachers to be telling kids how fucking hip double mastectomies are? Right? Hell, I'll go further - I really don't care who uses what bathroom, tbh, as long as they're not doing something that is already considered awful for innumerable other, non-gender-related reasons. As long as you can agree that, actually, prescribing chemical castration drugs to otherwise healthy 10 year olds is not the sort of thing that should be considered consistent with the rest of our medical ethics.

Here, I've even prepared a light-hearted cartoon about my attempt to find common ground and compromise in the broad space in between our two positions:

If it seems pessimistic about the likelihood of genuine long-term peace and compromise over this or any other culture war issue, well. That's because I am.

[nogenderbee]

Brothers confessing to MC but she's a lesbian!

gender: female

type: headcanons

characters: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor

Before I start I just want to say one thing: Happy Pride Month! And I hope that you all will enjoy it. Also coming back with many ideas and no time heh...

------------------------------

"I understand if you don't feel the same way I do but I just needed to tell you this, so if you're willing to give me a chance, I promise I'll do everything I can to not disappoint you."

"(boy/name), you're really great person but...I'm a lesbian"

Lucifer:

"That's alright, don't worry about it I know it's just the way you are. And if you wish I will make sure every one of my brothers know that so they won't try things on you"

· if you decline his offer he wont tell a word, but if you accept his offer every of his brothers will know

· if one of his brothers will try anything on you they will be hanging from the ceiling for at least 100 yers but if some less demon will try anything on you well... they're dead

Mammon:

"Obviously I knew that! I was just.. practicing."

· he literally don't know what he's saying but then he realized that this might sounded a bit homophobic so he quickly changed the subject

"Anyway, how did you slept?"

· yup it doesn't make sense but luckily you picked up on his behavior so you decided to go with it

· if someone will try to confess to you he will instantly be like "She's a lesbian idiot!"

· if you didn't comed out yet, well...now you did! Because let's be honest he will tell it everyone and it's not be sure he wants to get his revenge on you but because he don't want anyone to make you uncomfortable

Leviathan:

"That's alright!"

· at first he thinks that it's just an excuse to not hurt him but he decides to go with it because you must have a reason right? yeah you're really a lesbian don't be so down on yourself Levi ily

· when he sees that you rejected every one of his brothers and every men that confessed to you he really start to think that you weren't actually lying

· well now he's sure that you weren't lying nad you're actually a lesbian and oh my he feel so bad for thinking you might lie to him

· at the end he buys you lesbian flag or other lesbian merch as an apology

Satan:

"Don't worry, it's understandable"

· he would tell everyone expect Lucifer so he can laugh from him that you're not interested in them as they are toward you

· overall it really doesn't change anything between you two

· he LOVES to see how you reject all those men, it's just funny for him how they still have hopes when you're obviously a lesbian

· if someone will start to offend you he WILL beat the shit out of them

Asmodeus:

· he completly understands it (I have headcanon that he's pansexual)

"Oh! I get it! No no no, don't worry about it, I'm not homophob!"

· know that other brothers also have a lil crush about you so he tell them that you're not interested in any of them (he didn't said anything about you being lesbian) so they won't make u uncomfortable

· if he see some men try to confess to you he will tell them that you're not interested or if you're after coming out that you're a lesbian

· overall extremely supportive and caring

Beelzebub:

· very supportive from the beginning

"I'm so sorry! I didn't know! I can take you to (your favorite restaurant) as an apology! And not like a date don't worry"

· will tell Belphie, Belphie will tell Satan and...well we all know what Satan will do (if you don't then scroll up a bit)

· will appear beside you if someone will try to insult you because of your sexuality or because you rejected them and well...this person is running for their life now

Belphegor:

· if you though he was a little sleepy layer well...now he's less sleepy...

"That's alright, I'm gonna take a nap now, bye."

· he tried not to make you feel guilty but I guess that's up to you if he succeed or failed

· he feels a little bad about getting rejected so he sleeps most of the days

· also probably tells Beel and Satan

· after Beel confronts him, he start to hang out with you just like he did before confessing

[londonalozzy]

Stop Pretending (TFATWS)

Fandom: Marvel

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Genre: Romance, Angst

Summary: The reader thinks she's doing a stellar job of keeping her feelings for a certain soldier buried deep inside. Turns out, all it takes is an observant new friend to begin the unraveling of her most precious secret (Spoilers for TFATWS)

Masterlist

Word: Pretence

Definition: A way of acting that is intended to deceive people.

Example: Saying that he's just a friend when he's really the love of your life.

Your POV

Being caught in the midst of war is something that I, (Y/N) (Y/L/N)  know all too well. As a war vet, former shield agent, and now Avenger I'm used to being centered amongst conflict. When the fight begins within me though, a battle between what I want and what I think is right, how will I react? Will I listen to my heart, my head, or will the winner be chosen for me?

Delacroix, Louisiana.....

I love my sleep, always have, always will. It's not necessarily the comfort of the bed, the quiet or even the rest. It's the fact that I'm at peace when I sleep. My life has a tendency to fall apart when I'm awake, so anything that will put that off for as long as possible I savor.

I wish it were the same for a certain super soldier in my life. I look forward to going to bed, everything calms down then, and for most people it's the same. For Bucky however, it's when everything starts, the nightmares, the terrors, the seemingly unending darkness. If only I could take his pain away like he has with mine.

For the last few weeks, my life had, for want of a better word, been hectic. Hectic to say the least.

After the eventual defeat of Thanos and the loses we endured as a result, I thought naively that life might calm down a bit, that I'd have time to breathe, to live. How wrong I was.

It all began with John Walker being announced to the world as the new Captain America.

I was baking cookies with Morgan in the Stark family kitchen when it came over the radio. As that latest turn of events sunk in, my first thoughts were of Bucky, what that would do to him. Not even an hour later I had said my goodbyes and was on my way to help him get the shield back.

Since then even more had happened. We'd regrouped with Sam, busted Zemo out of prison which in turn ruffled the feathers of Ayo and the Dora Milaje. We came face to face with Morgenthou and the Flag Smashers, and finally witnessed the man who thought he could even compete with Steve, make himself judge, jury and most significantly executioner.

After that went around the world we knew we had to end it sooner rather than later. It couldn't get much worse than Captain America becoming a murderer. We got the shield back, which was a fight all in itself. Handed Zemo over to Ayo, to try and recompense for the distrust we'd instilled in the people who'd helped us so much. Then we travelled to stay with Sam and his family in Louisiana whilst we waited for Karli's next move.

This is where we found ourselves now, in the eye of it, the calm before the storm.

Waking up in the Wilson households guest room, I was greeted to the golden hue of the rising sun penetrating through the single glaze windows, and the melodic sounds of gulls on the hunt for their morning meal down by the docks.

Actually, no that's not right. What I could hear was most certainly not birds, and it was definitely not melodic. What were those boys doing?

Quickly and quietly I threw on the first clothes I could get my hands on and made my way downstairs towards the noise. What caught my attention when I discovered the source, was not the two youngest Wilson boys playing with our newly reacquired shield in the living room, but the super solider who was blissfully ignorant to it all, sleeping peacefully on the couch in front of them. I don't think I'd ever been so happy.

"Right you two, if you're determined to play Avengers all morning then I suggest you re-assemble in the back yard. You're gonna wake Bucky up," I whispered out in one breath, stepping between the boys, then placing my hands on their backs and tip toeing them towards the door.

"So what if we wake him up? It's gone 10am," Cass questioned in protest, pulling on his sneakers and jacket.

"Exactly! Which is why if you do as I say, I will make you the biggest plate of waffles for breakfast that you've ever seen."

The boys eyes lit up. "Can we have ice cream with it? Mum never lets us have ice cream for breakfast, and I'm sure there's a tub of Stark raving hazelnuts in the freezer," AJ clapped in muted excitement. "Oh, for God's sake.....Yes. You can have whatever you want if you get out of this house now and keep the noise down."

Once the boys were outside, I made my way over to the kitchen, stopping on the way to lean over my favourite senior citizen and make sure that he was still peaceful in his slumber. He'd never looked so relaxed, so at ease. It was a brand new Bucky I'd never seen before, a Bucky that had my heart pounding for him even more than it normally did. Not that he knew any of that.

Half an hour later and up to my elbows in waffle mix, I failed to notice my new friend and host Sarah making her way to my side at the counter, the huge smile on my face not going unnoticed. "What's got you grinning like the Cheshire cat, like I need to ask?"

"Bucky's sleeping. Isn't it amazing?" I spoke softly, bouncing up and down on my feet as I did so.

"And why is that?" She couldn't looked more confused if she tried.

"In all the years I've known him, I don't think I've ever woken up before he has. If his nightmares don't keep him awake all night, they normally have him up before the crack of dawn. I don't think I've ever seen him so still."

"Good answer," Sarah nodded in a hush, understanding why this meant so much to me, but not done yet with her morning interrogations, "Now on to my next question......"

"I'm already not liking the sound of this."

"Sleeping Beauty over there follows you around like a little puppy dog. He hangs on your every word, looks at you like you hung the stars or something. It's pretty obvious how crazy he is about you, so when are you gonna stop pretending that you're not head over heels in love with him?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Wilson," I smiled forcefully, making out like the waffle maker deserved my attention way more than the conversation I was being made to have.

This was all Sam's doing, without a shadow of a doubt. He'd tried to have this conversation with me on multiple occasions and I shut him down every time. He obviously hadn't given up like I thought he did, and decided to draft in his sister. He is seriously gonna regret it when I find him.

"Sure you know what I'm talking about. Sam sees it, I don't even know you that well and I see it. The only reason Bucky doesn't, is because he doesn't believe he could ever be that lucky. You're a smitten kitten." These Wilson's are all as annoying as each other.

Knowing I wasn't getting out of this one, I grabbed Sarah by the arm and pulled her right into the corner of the room, trying my best to keep this convo as private as possible. "Look, I'm not pretending.....I'm ignoring. There's a difference."

"Care to explain what that difference is?" Sarah spoke softly, but with a sarcastic air.

Turning to look over my shoulder at the subject of our conversation, making sure he was still safely in the land of nod, I decided to just be honest. Sarah was much like her brother. Once she wanted to get to the bottom of something she wasn't about to give up.

"I love Bucky, more than I've ever loved anyone...and that terrifies me," the rawness of finally being honest making my voice shake, and tears come to my eyes. "Nat was like my sister, and she's dead. Tony was the closest I've ever gotten to having a Dad...and he's dead too. Then there's Steve, Vision, God knows where Wanda is....Everyone I love, either leaves or dies. If I admit my feelings for Buck then I face the risk of losing him too."

"Do you have any idea how crazy you sound right now? He's not going to die because you love him (Y/N)."

Silent tears were falling now. I was revealing my deepest fears to a woman I'd only known a few days, and I'm not underplaying it when I say it was like a colossal weight off my chest, a release I didn't know I needed. "Believe me...I know, but I can't take that risk. I can't lose anyone else, especially not him."

"Let's just say for a second that you're right, that there is some higher power somewhere, set on destroying everyone you love. Do you really think ignoring your feelings is going to make them disappear?" I didn't know what to say to that. "Natasha and Stark died so that everyone could continue living, and (Y/N) you're not living as long as you keep this to yourself. They wouldn't want that for you."

"But what if I lose him?" I whispered with a choked sigh.

"Then at least he'll die knowing how you felt about him. After everything he's been through don't you think he deserves to know there's someone out there who loves him like you do?"

"Of course..."

Sarah's lips pulled upwards in a satisfied smirk, wrapping her arm around my shoulder and giving it a comforting squeeze, "then you owe it to yourself, and to him, to tell him the truth."

"Why do all you Wilson's have to be so clever?" I voiced in mock irritation, pushing her away from me and acting like I was annoyed she had gotten one up on me.

"I don't know," she thought aloud and with a cheeky grin, grabbing a plate to start piling on the long forgotten waffles, "I think it might be the sea air or something."

"Nah, it's in the genes," I chuckled quietly, grabbing my jacket and deciding it was time to get this conversation wrapped up. "I'll go find Sam and the boys for breakfast. Clear my head a little bit."

"You promise you're gonna tell him?" Sarah stopped me as I went to push the door open.

"I'll think about it."

3rd person POV

Once (Y/N) was out of ear shot, Sarah couldn't help but start jumping up and down in excitement, clapping her hands loudly as she did so. That went even better than she thought it would, and she was so proud of herself. Sarah Wilson could now add matchmaker to her resume.

"Coast is clear Barnes. You can open your eyes now."

(Y/N) had no idea what she had metaphorically walked into just minutes earlier, entering that very revealing conversation with her overly inquisitive host.

What drew Sarah to come down that morning was the sounds of both the front porch door opening and the smell of homemade waffles wafting up the stairs. As she entered the kitchen she was met with two sights. One being (Y/N), facing the counter and looking very smiley, the other being a wide awake super soldier who was just laying on the couch and staring at her, the sole object of his affection. Sarah could work with this.

Every time (Y/N) turned back in his direction, Bucky would close his eyes and pretend to be asleep again. He had never slept so soundly, so peacefully, thoughts of (Y/N) and his new friends filling his nightmare free dreams.

He'd initially woken to (Y/N) ushering the boys outside because she was afraid they would wake him up. He didn't want to disappoint her by proving her right. Besides, he liked just watching her move around the kitchen, completely unaware he was observing her the whole time. He had no idea about the conversation that was just about to happen.

After (Y/N) had left and Sarah had confirmed so, Bucky sat himself up, his body shaking with adrenaline and a look of complete shock fixed on his face. Had he definitely woken up, or had the whole thing been a part of his dream? Did (Y/N) seriously just admit that she was in love with him?

Bucky didn't know how to react, didn't know what to say as he looked up at a smug Sarah from his spot. All he'd ever wanted was for (Y/N) to feel the same way about him as he did about her. Now he knew that she did.

"You're welcome by the way."

[sysmedsaresexist]

Yo! Sorry to bother, but I saw someone defending Endogenics by saying they have been medically recognized and have had actual research done. I know this is probably a load of bull but do you by any chance know any legit studies they might be talking about? Not the ones with bad reputation, I know those can be unreliable. I'm genuinely curious if they really have been recognized and how doctors would plan to help them, since you know... No trauma, and yet some still go to trauma therapy?? Idk, they just confuse me so much, I really try to understand both sides but endos are so... Odd. Nothing is ever consistent and as someone who used to be part of the community, I can say it's really a toxic space to keep you in denial of possible trauma, rather that encouraging healing.

Also, I've been meaning to send in an ask for this for a bit but never got to it so I might as well kill two birds in one stone.

With a lot of advances being made with being able to see distinct differences in normal subjects and those with DID, how could we be so sure about Endogenics doing the same study? If they don't know their trauma and really are just confused, couldn't that really mess up research? It's just been on my mind, of course some studies would prove to confirm their existence cause of whatever percentage is actually traumatized. It's just.... Idk it's scary to me that this is looking like the reality we're heading for. Regardless, thank you for working so hard to dispell all the myths within this currently chaotic community, I really appreciate it. Remember, take care of yourself!

OMG so many words

UHM

Okay, first, on endos being recognized. I've only ever heard two arguments for that. First is the Stanford study, which is not completed. It's on hold due to covid. They put a bunch of parogenics in an MRI machine, but not a single thing has been released yet. There's literally not a single bit of information out there yet. For whatever reason, they're being very tight lipped about it.

1) That's not recognition, that's people acknowledging that these people say they exist, and making the very first attempt to see what's going on there.

2) the person running the study is horribly biased, kind of creepy (fetishizes tulpas), and may be a practicing tulpamancer himself.

I don't trust this study at all.

Second, and just commonly, when endos say that they're medically recognized, they're talking about the exclusion criteria in the DSM. Unfortunately, they're just flat out misunderstanding that criteria. The idea is that the DSM says you can't be diagnosed if possession states are a part of the culture or religion you grew up in, therefore, endogenic plurality must exist, BUT, when you read more into this criteria, what they're excluding is short term, non-recurrent possession states. IE, if the entity sticks around for any length of time, it doesn't fall under this exclusion. As well, WHAT FUCKING CULTURE ARE THESE PEOPLE FROM, THAT THEY CAN CLAIM THIS EXCLUSION? It's incredibly disrespectful to people that actually practice some of these experiences. I debunked this entire idea in this post, and included several cultures and religions that would be included under the exclusion and how it's different.

What they fail to understand is that the DSM isn't excluding endogenic systems, it's excluding things that aren't plurality/multiplicity at all, in any sense. Yes, there has been research into these non plural, cultural experiences, and the conclusion is just that-- they're non plural. Not that they're endogenic.

To your second question/point...

I expect there's going to be three outcomes of the MRI studies, once they start putting endogenic systems in the machines (if they ever do, because despite what you read online, no one in the clinical community actually believes it's possible to be a system without trauma).

1) These endogenic systems will have the exact same brain patterns as those with DID/OSDD. These brain patterns match those with PTSD, but on a much more significant scale. It'll come out that they're not endogenic, but traumagenic.

2) These endogenic systems will display no differences from a healthy brain, including the inability to see "switching" happening on the scans (which they have already studied and yes, we can see switching). It'll come out that they're not actually plural. This won't change much, they're still going to claim it's what they're experiencing, but it'll be extremely clear that it's something completely different from DID/OSDD.

3) Their brain patterns will match disorders with similar presenting symptoms-- like those with BPD, for example.

For why they go to therapy, we were actually just talking about this in a syscourse server I'm in. Newer terms like adaptive fall under the endogenic umbrella, but are really just fancy ways of denying trauma. Some endogenic systems aren't ready to face what they went through, or they feel like the term "traumagenic" throws their trauma in their faces too much. Others, in a blatant attempt to feel in control of some aspect of their lives, will claim they purposefully created their system. It gives them some kind of comfort to say it was their choice to be like this. All in all, it's not exactly shocking to me that so many of them are in trauma therapy.

Denial is a bitch, unfortunately.

I hope this helps! If you have any more questions, please reach out!

[stargazer-balladeer]

What kind of boyfriend are they? [Persona]

Characters Included: Akira Kurusu, Akechi Goro, Yosuke Hanamura, Yu Narukami, Minato Arisato & Shinjiro Aragaki

Note: I'm mixing Persona 3, 4 & 5! :3 Except all of them are my fav characters (HUSBANDOS—) ahem. Anyway. I hope ya'll enjoy this :3 (This is over 500+ words... whOOPS--)

Reader’s Gender: Neutral

Warning: Spoilers

Akira Kurusu

-Akira is the kind of boyfriend that teases the heck out of you. Like he loves to fluster you so much from embarrassment, whether from kissing you in public or simply holding your hands. He'll have that smirk on his face, its always present. (You're wondering if it's permanent though—)

-But I can also see Akira as the guy who loves someone, really loves that one (aside from the fact that he dates multiple girls in the game—). The reason why he teases you is because he loves you, and for that reason, when he finds that you are close to fainting or uncomfortable, he'll stop teasing you. He doesn't want you fainting or uncomfortable around him!

-He's also a natural romantic guy. Like he'll give you flowers and gifts (or trinkets he found). He wants to spoil you so much but he has limited money, so he resorted to small gifts and trinkets that reminded him of you. Your dates consist of staying at the LeBlanc, enjoying the cafe itself or inside the attic (i.e: his room).

-He loves affection so much, but not because he's touch-starved, he simply just loves you so much (yes, I'll say it over and over again :3). If you want cuddles, then cuddles you get. No matter where, but I think he prefers it private since, you know, his reputation? He just doesn't want to affect your reputation because of his ;-; But kisses, on the other hand, he can do it even in public, he has no shame -3- He'll even leave a kiss on you for teasing purposes (and to see your flustered self). He'll just laugh at your reaction, finding every reaction you have is cute on you. (He also has a picture of you as his wallpaper in his phone :) and his friends knows it since he shows it to them.. he's so proud and in-love with you :3)

-But if you don't like or uncomfortable of affection or him touching you, he understands. He'll always ask permission before holding you or kissing you. He respects your privacy and comfort more than his own. If you find uncomfortable, then he'll find a way for it to make it comfortable with you.

-I can see Akira giving his s/o a piggyback-ride, no matter whether you weigh heavily or just right (but if you weigh very lightly, he'll be concerned). He really doesn't mind your weight at all (he likes to say you don't weigh a lot). I can also see him as a domestic guy, he learned how to cook (thanks to Sojiro) and learned to take care of animals (Morgana, lol).

-He's protective of you. If you're in the Phantom Thieves, double-protectiveness over you activated. He just doesn't want you to get hurt ;-; He's scared of losing you in the Metaverse. So if an attack is directed at you, he'll get the hit. If you get hit while he isn't paying attention (probably coming up a strategy), after the battle, he'll immediately patch you up or go to a nearby resting place. And I can also see the rest of the Team also being protective of you :3

-Akira is also observant about you, even if he doesn't look like it. So he knows immediately when you're upset or uncomfortable. In which case, he'll drag you away from the source immediately. Leaving that person dumbfounded.

-If you feel sad about something, the actions of Akira would depend on how severe your sadness or situation is (though they are still similar to one another). Did someone talk bad about you? Don't worry, Akira would hug you and voice out all of the good things about you (and probably imagine how he'll defeat that person's shadow). Did someone close to you recently die? Akira will bring some comfort food to you (or to his place if you went there) and comfort you while eating. Are you upset because of your grades? "Treasure.. have you seen Ryuji's?" but in all seriousness, he'll offer to help you study for the next test. Are you having a existential crisis? He'll also comfort you as he voice out how important you are to him, and that's the reason why he calls you his "treasure". Are you sad because everyone is unique and you're just you? Akira would say how special you are to him and that you don't need to stand out.

-Long story short, he'll comfort you no matter what. :) Can I have a Akira pls? -3- I'm getting jealous over here...

-But if he needs comforting, please comfort him ;-; Sometimes, all of the duties of handling his rehabilitation, school and being the Phantom Thief leader and people in general gets to him. He's still a kid— teenager. And it gets to him sometimes. He's the kind of guy that bottles his emotions up until it cannot anymore hold itself together. So please comfort this boi ;-;

-Overall, he's like a perfect boyfriend :)

Goro Akechi

-Akechi is somewhat-like Akira, yet different at the same time. He's hesitant to pursue or enter a relationship because of his Detective (and other) duties, he fear that he cannot handle a relationship because of that. So the word "surprise" might be an understatement at how Akechi feels as you, his now newly-announced s/o, told him that you just want to love him and lets him do whatever he does. Akechi was actually glad to have someone like you his s/o, someone who understands and love him at the same time. Akechi would be lying if he didn't find you attractive when you first meet.

-Akechi will tease you time from time, enjoying every reaction your making each time, it never fails to put a smile on his face. But he might not be into PDA, since he likes to keep your relationship a secret to the world (media). He tells you so that you won't have to fear about his fanbase. But in reality, he just fears that if Shido knows about you, he would use you against Akechi (which he doesn't like -3-).

-Let's face it, he has you as his wallpaper in his phone. Whenever he feels lonely or just have a moment to himself, he'll just open his phone and stares at his wallpaper. He unconsciously smiles at you in the picture as he continues his day with a smile present on his face. Many people who's near to him noted how happy he was when he looks at his phone for some reason. But Akira manages to find out while he's raising his confidant level for Akechi :)

-Akechi would notice every quirks and twitches you have, since undoubtedly, he has a keen and observant eyes. He would immediately know which ones you like, which ones you don't like, how comfortable you are, how uncomfortable you currently are, and more. But that doesn't make him a stalker >:( He just wants to know which ones you prefer and how comfortable you are. He prioritizes your comfort over his :)

-Akechi always put his mask on around everyone else, but to you? His mask is slowly slipping away. If you play your cards right, he might reveal his true self to you and only you. But he won't tell you about Shido, since he still fears your safety. He tells you partly everything about his childhood, how his life is in the orphanage and all that. Akechi'll mentally prepare himself for you reaction, are you disgusted? Would you leave him now that you know? Those thoughts ran through his head. When (not if because you chose him, how dare you not accepting him >:(.) you accept him though, he'll start to cry.

-Akechi might not be a natural at being romantic, but he tries. I can see him as a gentlemen type though :3, like he'll open doors for you and pulls the chair for you. He'll also give you gifts and trinkets he saw while in his detective duties. I imagine him giving you your favorite flower every meeting (or dates) you two have, like if you're just walking and suddenly come across Akechi, he (for some reason) has your favorite flower at hand and ready to give it to you. Expect your house to be filled with flowers with how often you two meet.

-But its not everyday you two meet, note this. Akechi already warned you about his job since it takes up most of his time, so he's usually not able to meet you as often as he likes to. But he'll call or text you if he has free time, probably asking how you are and lets you rant about what happened during the day. Akechi loves hearing your voice, so he lets you rant as long as you want. If he's given a day-off (so rare ;-;), he'll want to spend it with you. Though he prefers to stay at home, but if you want to go somewhere, he'll concede.

-Your dates consist of going to restaurants, cafe and LeBlanc. This boi loves pancakes, so you better bring him to a restaurant where they serve pancakes X3. But if you can cook pancakes, Akechi would probably want to marry you on the spot :). Whenever you are in LeBlanc though, you would stare at the duo trying out-wit each other, its amusing to you how frustrated Akechi is and smug Akira is.

-But I can see Akechi being touch-starved since he doesn't have anyone while growing up, so he practically clings to you like a koala. But if you're uncomfortable with affectionate touches, he doesn't mind either. Just please hold his hand so that he feels safe (it also settles his mind and heart knowing you're still here by his side ;-;).

-If you're in the Phantom Thieves (oh boy, here we go), Akechi would be scared at the idea of having to kill you and the rest of the team. He knows how much the group of misfits means to you, but he knows he has to do the task he's given. So until that time come, just stay in his arms and let him love you while he still can ;-; (I'm making this depressing..). While still into the subject of comforting, if he starts to cry because of all the stress, please comfort him ;-; Though I can also see him pushing you away, in fear you'll get hurt. Just persist and continue to comfort him :) He'll slowly warm up to you.

-If you need comforting though, he'll get awkward and not know how to comfort you. Don't blame him though (because he never had anyone, remember?). He'll try his best to comfort you, and by that I mean letting you cry as he holds you. He'll make you rant about what you're sad about, and just listens to you. After the crying mess, he'll drag you to the TV to watch a movie. He did this so that whatever the reason behind your crying would be temporarily be gone. But if it involve some school issues, he'll help you there since he knows about that area. But the others? Yeah, haha... no.

-Akechi isn't a perfect boyfriend but he tries :) (Just prepare yourself in breaking up with him when you reach Shido's Palace :(.)

Yosuke Hanamura

-Yosuke is a bit of a tease but not too much, only eliciting a reaction from you. Yosuke is also a bit shy when it comes to the subject of romance, so he might be awkward and shy at times (this is the moments where you have to take the lead). Like that time where he first asked you out on a date, he's so nervous that he stumbles with his words (the rest of his friends were cheering for him from behind). You have to connect the dots if you ever want to understand what he's trying to say, and you better say yes :)

-He's not really into PDA like most people expect (probably because of his somewhat-shyness). But he always likes to hold hands with you. Not many people know you two are together though, only his friends (and parents) since you two act like best friends still. His friends also relentlessly tease the both of you (mainly Yosuke though), much to his dismay.

-Yosuke also wants to spoil you so he spend all of his money getting what you want, so please don't abuse this and pLEASE MAKE HIM STOP! Because Yosuke might end up being more broke than ever ;-; He's too kind...

-Yosuke might take a while to get used to the fact that you two are a couple (since he's still hang-up with Saki's death), but when he does get used to it, prepare yourself. Yosuke loves giving you back-hugs, even more if its a back-hug you didn't expect. He just hugs you from behind and stuff his face into your neck or hair, either way they smell good. Yes, he loves your smell, got a problem? He also loves peppering you with kisses on your neck (not in a sensual way though!), he doesn't know why but he does it. If you're ticklish in that area, it just gives him a reason to do just that (he loves the sound of your laughter).

-He shares his headphones with you and lets you borrow it for the rest of the day if you want. He's also the kind of guy that if you're short, places his head on top of your head and arms around your figure and sway the both of you (I like this idea, it's too adorable >w<). Also the kind of guy that uses his height as an advantage to grab an item you need and hold it above his head while laughing as you try to get it back. This is his kind of teasing :)

-Your date consists of Junes or your place (not his because Teddie is there). Junes is his favorite place so if you want to date there, he'll be ecstatic. You two will sit there while eating the food you bought as you two talk about random things you two can think of. I think this is Yosuke's ideal date though, just relaxing and talking. But if his boredom comes to play, be prepared because he's gonna drag you away from Junes or your house and explore Inaba together. Boredom is what Yosuke fears afterall. If you two are hanging out in your house, be prepared for pillow fights and tickle fights because Yosuke is for sure gonna start it :)

-Yosuke would also might use some pick-up lines on you, some cheesy ones and some random ones. If you use a pick-up line on him as well, you two will have a pick-up contest on which one would have the best pick-up line ever. You two will also have inside jokes that only you two understand. Yosuke also loves you pouncing on him from behind and giving you piggy-back rides, but if its in public, he might get embarrassed.

-Being Yosuke's girlfriend also means being great friends with his, mainly Yu. Yu is Yosuke's partner (I SHIP IT!!) so he wants you to meet his partner. The team would instantly welcome you into their group, and they love you very much :3 Yu also hangs out with you and Yosuke, if you or Yosuke suggest it (he ain't telling being a third-wheeler :/). Teddie would also join in on your date if its at Junes, Yosuke easily getting angry at Teddie for interrupting your date.

-If you're in the Investigation Team, he'll get protective of you, acting like you're knight. He'll be damned if you get hit, so he mostly get the hits directed for you. But if you get hit, he'll sulk and beg forgiveness to you (even though its not either your faults that the Shadow is fast enough). He'll also help you train if you have a hard time with your Persona.

-Yosuke is observant and perspective so he notices your mood, quirks and twitches. He'll immediately notice if you're mood dampen, even if its a little he'll notice. He wants to immediately know what's wrong. If you want to cry, he'll let you cry as he holds you close. If you say "I'm fine", Yosuke would argue that you're clearly aren't. Either way, Yosuke would make sure to make you let it all out.

-If you're sad, he'll comfort you. Whatever the reason is, he'll know it later. The first thing to do is comfort you. He'll not immediately ask you to tell him, he'll let you take your time to explain to him why he found you crying (or sad). Is it about grades? Don't worry, it happens. Yosuke would teach you (he's intelligent, he just doesn't know it yet :3). Is it because of bullying (or someone talking bad about you)? Yosuke would get angry at them as he started to rant why they shouldn't do that and that you shouldn't listen to them. Is it because someone close to you died? Yosuke would remain silent as he just hugs you. Long story short, he'll comfort you in every way..

-Remember me stating Yosuke is observant? Yeah, I'm gonna bring it up again. Yosuke prioritizes your comfort over his, as he finds ways for you to be comfortable if you're uncomfortable. Yosuke always reassure you that he doesn't love Saki anymore, but in truth, he's just reassuring himself. But after Yosuke talked to Yu, he'll confront you about this. Please forgive him and comfort him ;-; he needs it. Afterall, first love is much harder to let go of..

-Overall, Yosuke loves and cherishes you. Please be patient with this man as he tries to move on from the death of his first love :)

Yu Narukami

-Yu is the kind of guy that also teases his s/o by kissing their nose, leaving unexpected kiss on the lips and surprising them by hugging them from behind. He loves every flustered reaction you have (and thinks its cute every time). He'll stop if you want, but if not, he'll continue to tease you with his teasing antics. He's also kind of childish (this is my perspective of Yu, don't judge :3) so while holding hands with you, he'll swing it back-and-forth, while also being careful not to hit anyone.

-People can tell that you two are immediately a couple though (from Yu's antics alone), since Yu is an affectionate partner to have. You know the thing where the person's significant other is sitting on a chair while the other is sitting on the floor and in-between their significant other's legs? Yu is on the floor while you are on the chair. This usually results in Yu putting your legs on his shoulders and carrying you around like that, not putting you down until class start or he has to (much to your dismay and embarrassment), which usually Yu reluctantly let you go.

-His friends would gag at the sight of you (Yosuke), but they're super supportive towards their Captain's relationship with you. But they would ask their Leader to tone down his affection towards you.

-Yu loves to cuddle you and peppering you with kisses all over your face, he has no shame (;-; or :)). He's also the kind of guy that stays faithful with one only, and stays with that person because when he loves, he really loves :3 (again, aside from the games :3). He wants you to know about his love for you, and the only way he knows how is engulfing you with it :) He is mature but he lets loose around you because he's so comfortable with you. He's also a domestic-kind of guy (similar to Akira). If you don't how to cook, don't worry! Yu is here to teach you how, starting how to make Curry.

-Yu lets you borrow his jacket (or hoodie) whenever its cold, and usually blush at the sight of you in his clothing. Its usually big since he's so freakin' tall -_- He'll also help you in your projects and homework, usually having it at either your home or his. Though in his, Nanako would pester you two (not in a bad way though). Oh, and also both Dojima and Nanako immediately accepts you as Yu's s/o. So no worries about there :)

-Your dates consist of either houses or exploring Inaba together. Yu's still new in Inaba so he wants to explore it while he still can. Whether you live there or recently moved there (like him) doesn't matter to him. Since you lived there, do you mind showing him around then? If not, don't worry, let's explore together! In houses though, you two just mostly chill. Talking about random stuff while listening to music or watching TV.

-I can see him as a guy that gives you your favorite flower and tuck it in your head :3 (Don't worry, he already got rid of the thorns in it). This guy lives for cheesiness :3 Oh, I forgot to mention. Teddie would tease you and Yu (though very ineffective) and worship you as well since your dating his sensei.

-If you're in the Investigation Team, he'll be very protective of you but he lets you fight (he trusts you that you won't intentionally get hurt :/). But if a Shadow hurt you, Yu would immediately kill it and tend to you. But when it comes to the lady boss (Adachi), Yu would ask you to not join the fight, in fear you would get hurt. If you persist enough, Yu would reluctantly let you join the battle in one condition, stay by his side.

-Yu is also an observant fellow, seemingly enough to figure out a person's true self, even if that person doesn't. Yu can tell if you're not being yourself or not in the mood, he will ask you instantly what's wrong. If you don't tell, Yu would get worried but doesn't press on. He's worried because (if you're not yet in the Team) you might appear in the Midnight Realm or your Shadow self will appear again. So please tell him what's wrong so that his worry will cease. If you do tell him, he'll listen to you.

-If you're sad, he'll comfort you. He'll do it everytime you feel sad or want to cry. He'll hold you close and either bask in silence or listening to you rant. Your choice :)

-Also, Yu spoils you so much to the point that you have to tell him to stop because he might get broke like Yosuke. But he always reassure you that he has spare money. But please stop this boi from spoiling you too much... OR you spoil him in return (he'll gratefully accept whatever you've given him).

-Overall, Yu is an ideal boyfriend to have (I want a Yu :(.)

Minato Arisato

-Minato likes to tease you a bit to see your (cute) flustered reaction, he enjoys seeing you like that afterall. But he won't do it every time. Which is worse because you have to expect the unexpected. Like when you were writing something in your notebook, the next thing you knew that Minato kiss your cheek. Yes, he's a cheeky bastard :)

-Minato also shares his headphones with you and bask in it. If you have a playlist of your own, he'll listen to it with you. Minato is a private boi, so he does little to no PDA. Prefers all of the affection behind doors, his or your dorm. Though he doesn't mind holding hands with you or giving you a hug, only rarely does he give you a kiss in public.

-Minato isn't as affectionate as the other leaders are (almost all of them are except him ;-;), but he tries his best. Like Yu, he shows his love for you through actions instead of words since talking is a pain for him. He'll cuddle you inside either your dorms and pepper you kisses all over your face. He also has no shame ;).

-He prefers to relax and chill since he doesn't want to waste energy (I'm having Oreki vibes here owo'). So his ideal date is to just chillax in the bed, curled up with one another, and cuddling each other. He likes the feeling of your legs entangle with his though. And this is basically your date! Though he will also take you out to Paulownia Mall or anywhere since he doesn't want you to cope up in the room for too long.

-Minato also likes giving you gifts and small trinkets while he's going around town, stating that they remind him of you. He will also remember everything you said to him, which is handy since he also remembers which ones you want. You probably didn't know this so when its either your birthday or Christmas, you'll be surprised to see the thing you wanted to have.

-Minato loves everything about you, your hair, your eyes, your voice, your laughter, your hands, just basically everything. This is the only time he'll be vocal about it, much to your embarrassment. He'll also give you a piggy-back ride if you want, even in public. He might not look like much, but he's pretty strong for a short guy. (Probably from all the training he has done with Akihiko :).)

-The SEES basically accepts you by this point, since you make their Leader happy, their fine with you. Junpei might flirt with you every now and then. Yukari would talk with you about girl things. Akihiko might also drag you to his training session, in which Minato drags you away from your senpai -w- Basically, they just accept you to their wholesome family. Also, Aigis might thanked you for making their Leader happy.

-If you're in the SEES, Minato would still treat you like any other member. Except for the fact that he's stuck by your side through the journey to reach Tartarus' top. He'll help you train your Persona if you need training.

-Minato is also observant about you (all of these bois are observant -_-), so he will instantly know when something is wrong. But he might not let you know about it, and lets it go along. It isn't until you two are alone in the room when he asks you what's wrong. You don't need to answer him, just let him scoop you up in his arms. He respects your privacy though if you want to left alone, but be aware that you'll find him sleeping outside of your door.

-If you're upset about something, he'll know what's bothering you even if you don't tell him, he just knows. For now, he'll comfort you. After that, he'll deal with the problem. If its about someone talking bad about you, he'll get Mitsuru involve. If its about projects and homework or not understanding the lesson, he'll help and teach you about it. He's a smart boi.

-I can see Minato finding it adorable at what you look like with his clothes, he just finds it so cute. He lets you steal his clothes though. As long as you wear them, it's fine. Though you need to return those or else he has nothing left to wear.

-Overall, Minato is a private affectionate bby :)

Shinjiro Aragaki

-Shinjiro doesn't tease often as the previous bois does, but he does tease. If you have a short stature, he'll get what you were getting and hold it above his head while watching you with a smirk on his face as you tried to get it from him. If he's feeling bold, he might place a kiss on your mouth and chuckle at your surprised, flustered face. Though he doesn't do this often.

-Shinjiro likes ruffling your hair for some reason. He won't admit it but he feels relaxed whenever he feels your hair or ran his fingers through your hair, it just feels so relaxing and calm for him. He also likes pinching you whenever he gets annoyed at you, if you pinch back, you two will have a pinching contest.

-Shinjiro has a hard time opening up to other people, so its a huge achievement if you manage to make him your boyfriend. He'll be flustered by it of course as he looks away while blushing ever-so-slightly. He's a bit of a tsun-tsun. But everyone who knows him (Akihiko and Mitsuru) would take note how Shinjiro's face soften around you, you can almost see a faint smile on his face whenever he looks at you. "He looks like a lovesick puppy." - Mitsuru, 2009

-Shinjiro isn't into PDA, so whenever you want to hold hands with him, he'll get flustered. But he won't refuse as he removes his hand from his pocket and holds your hand with his. He's just embarrassed. He'll drag you places to places, probably explore the town while you two can.

-He's not afraid to speak his mind though, beware. He'll speak without hesitation if you did something bad or do something stupid. If you did do something stupid, he'll snicker while teasingly taunting you. You'll get embarrassed by this of course. But when you two started to eat, you'll laugh at his comments about the food. His snide remarks never fails to make you laugh.

-Shinjiro allows you to take off his beanie and place it on your head, he might need to look away to hide his embarrassment and flustered self. His mind is racing on how cute you look with his beanie, WHY DOES THAT BEANIE LOOK BETTER ON YOU RATHER ON HIM?! He'll never understand that logic ever.

-Be prepared as well for competitions and playful fights, because this guy is competitive like Akihiko. He'll playfully banter with you about the difference between some things. Also, he'll be embarrassed when you find out that he cooks way better than you. If you ask if you can have some, he'll immediately say no. But if you continue to pester him, he'll soon give in. Be prepared to taste Heaven :)

-Shinjiro is insecure to himself because there is so much better guys out there for you, yet you chose him. Someone who'll not live long, someone who'll eventually leave you alone with a shattered heart. His mind will always plague this scenarios over and over again, he'll even be wide-awake at night just thinking about it. When he asks you one day why you chose him, you better reply honestly :) Reassure him that you love him and only him.

-Shinjiro is observant as hell so he knows immediately if you're hiding something or upset. Like MInato, he'll not ask you at once. Though if this behavior carries on for days, be prepared for Shinjiro's interrogation :) He just wants to help you, so please come to him if you have a problem with anything

-(I just realized I made SEES bois with sad s/o. Please read how Shinjiro comforts you whenever you're sad there. x.)

-I can see him telling you to find another one to love when he dies. Move on, but don't forget about Shinjiro. Continue living even if he's not there, he'll remain in your heart forever.. (Okay.. I teared up in this one ;-;).

-Overall, please be with this boi until the very end..

[x] Main Page || [x] Persona 5 Page || [x] Persona 4 Page || [x] Persona 3 Page

[nightswithkookmin]

JIKOOK:DON'T ASK ME TO STOP LOVING YOU. I WON'T- Jikook Shading eachother pt3

Disclaimer:

Everything expressed in her is my opinion. It is not intended to be malicious or disrespectful to any of the parties here in mentioned. Please don't be weird.

Jeon Jungkook is in love with Park Jimin. Period. If you have doubts, take my word for it. That man heard a bell ring and he's been following that jingle sound till thy kingdom come. Bless him.

No, I am not off track. We are still on the Jikook breakup/fights 2020 train and it's express. Beep beeeeep! Sorry.

Jk loves Jimin and it is the cause of all his woes- with Jimin as well as with the other bandmates. His problem is he loves that man- too much.

Yes, the 2019 November-December tensions with his bandmates was all because he keeps blurring the lines between his relationship and his career. He is lucky, both of them are lucky that they found eachother in a space like this where they have the opportunity to love and still have it all. Trust me, it's rare.

Except JK didn't join BTS to pursue a career. Bless him. He went there to harvest him some sweet love. Lol. Jokes aside, Jk when he started out had no goals, no ambitions whatsoever. He was young. He was just following the path set out for him by his parents perhaps, his teachers- and also he thought Namjoon's thighs were hella delicious. Lol

He has had to grow to love and appreciate his craft and career just as he's said in the recent Japan comeback interviews. He even almost quit singing to go be a dancer and all it took was Jimin telling him he had an amazing voice for him to stay- the power of park Jimin!

That's how young and naive he was when he began his career path. Let's get a bit deep and psychoanalyze him real quick. He made an entire life decision to join a boyband for seven years not because he loved to sing and dance but because he admired the zeal od RM?

Then when layer he was exposed to dance, and had to make an equally important life decision, he allowed another bandmate(Jimin) to make that decision for him. This should tell you the state of his mind as at the time. He was young and impressionable with no aspirations of his own.

Even as of 2019, he said he had no idea what he was going to do with his life after BTS had the band disbanded in 2018. That's a lot of experience span to not know what he wants to do with his life.

Now I don't mean to say he is immature but we all know the members especially Jimin have pointed out time and again that JK is in fact immature or can be.....

He seems to me as the type who still have a lot to figure out and per his recent interviews where he's talked about taking time to himself to work on himself and his hobbies etc. I have a feeling 2020 has been a period of awakening for him. A period where he is self actualizing a lot and I'm happy for him.

But it is what is causing this age of enlightenment in his life that has me curious.

Moving on, this young, naive, impressionable JK as he was in the early days of BTS started developed feelings for his hyung. Do you see the problem? I'll wait....

These feelings, I assume, began as pure admiration and fondness of Jimin. Jimin was this talented and hardworking, spontaneous, energetic hyung and JK with an impressionable mind as his was was bedazzled by him.

Soon these feelings would morph into what could be seen as an obsession, infatuation and then finally love.

The way I see it, loving Jimin gave him purpose for the first time in his young life. He may not have known much about his life goals and ambitions but he knew being with Jimin gave him a solid ground to stand on, a new sense of direction, certainty and purpose.

He got to share in Jimin's passions, share his with him, dance together, sing, practice, rehearse, make him the subject of his photography, the subject of his attention, care for him, be cared for by him- something he hadn't had the chance to experience from home before he was yanked away into idol life.

Growing up, we all experience that moment where we imprint on friends and relatives. My uncle was my mentor as well as my elder brother too. I admired them so much I sometimes confused that with romantic love till I got socialized properly.

Jk's socialization was.... He....

-Jk may be an introvert but he thrives and shines best when he partners up or is in a group like BTS or his friends group etc and Jimin i feel was the ideal partner for him; his queerness, his adventurousness, pushing JK's boundaries, challenging his beliefs, showing him how to have a good time- ok I really want this Jimin back! Like right now!

Jimin left an impression on JK's young mind. He imprinted on him. And for the longest time, we've seen the way he stares at Jimin.JK really loves Jimin.

So what's the problem?? Loving JM is consuming his mind y'all. It's all he thinks off. All he cares of. He seems super hyper focused on Jimin so much so that it is affecting the dynamics of their group.

His jealousy,possessiveness- He knows he has to keep his relationship a secret for the sake of the group because it is their secret too and yet he just can't help himself.

I feel RM and the others complain a lot about how he let's his jealousy get the best of him. Like how he almost exposed JM as his boyfriend on several occasions verbally( see previous post for further details)

Like how him getting jealous and possessive gives them away more often. I mean JM is bad at hiding it too but let's be honest JK isn't winning any awards with that bad acting. *sigh. He is hopeless.

But yes this is what led to the MMA standoff with RM. It is also the reason for the tensions between Jikook during Jin's birthday VLive (JM asked him to keep his distance because the members had tried to separate them earlier and so JM was just being salty af during this period. It had nothing to do with JK but the others. See Golden Disc and you'll understand)

This also led to their subsequent break up( which you will notice during the comeback interviews and promotions periods- I don't know about you but they were giving off two exes tryna to keep it happy for the cameras during that period but failed cos their interaction were just....)

PS: there are a lot of moments I want to point out but don't know where to begin cos there are a lot.

The blackswan behind scenes moments( JM asking JK if he he wanted to be in a subunit with someone else, JM making JK jealous during the interviews, JK using Tae to make JM jealous the next day, JK holding JMs hands not wanting to let go- he was missing his ex. Lol it's what you do when you have to be friends with that ex you still love and won't hesitate to touch them given the slightest opportunity and once you do you don'twanna let go)

Just look at that whole On comeback promotion moments. You'll understand what I mean.

Also the Run episode moments- you know the one JK almost beat Suga up with the frying pan- JM for this phase seemed to be to be trying to get back together with JK. Dude was clingy as fuck! And for once he was on his best behaviour, trying his hardest not to make JK jealous. I mean the Run behind scenes moment where JM was helping Tae clean off food residue on his mouth but stopped immediately when JK lifted his head. *insert skull head emoji. Lol

To say JM was a bit clingy during this getting back together phase would be an understatement. Remember his clingy moments during Suga's birthday Vlive 2020? And during Festa too? He was trying to get JK's attention and also impress him throughout.

Around this breakup moment too was when he was spending a lot of time with Tae playing video games with Army, posting their selfies at 4 AM and what not. It is also the same period he posted a picture of himself with his dogs on Twitter and said he was trying to spend time with loved ones- if that wasn't shade to JK!

They couldn't post 13th May because of these issues they were having. Not that JM didn't try though. He posted on the 1st, JK should have followed with 3rd but did was busy pouting somewhere. JM still gave us a 5/8=13 selca though so yaay!

What I'm trying to say is, their fight has been about JK not wanting to be separated from JM and JM asking JK to cool it off for a while to not cause trouble with the members and the company.

To which Jk responds with:

1. Interrupting JM's call with Jin during his VLive to ask him on a date and say I love you to him. Dude is a rebel, I don't know what you want me to say. He is not gonna cool it just because it makes the other worried he is exposing them too much.

Jk interrupting JMs live I feel got Jikook in trouble because after that Vlive JM never did a solo live on VLive again to this day. His subsequent lives have all been on YouTube.

I have a feeling he was penalized because that VLive exposed them. And no, I'm not being delusional. Jikook were both banned from doing a VLive together alone following their New Jersey VLIVE in 2019 when they- I don't even know how to describe what they did in that live!

And to make it less obvious, I think BigHit decided the others should stop doing solo Vlives on VLive altogether because now they all do their solo lives on YouTube as well and if they have to do a Vlive it is heavily monitored by BigHit staff or its radio and not done in their rooms too.

So I think Jimin got pissed at JK for doing that and getting them in trouble again. I mean if you heard him sigh during the new Jersey VLive you would know how frustrated JK makes him. He loves him too but.... Jk can be a bit too much ya know?!

Anyhoo, so I believe JM called for some space and told JK to take up interests in other things beside him and I don't know how JK took it but he responded with this:

Posting the cover of the song Not Never. Which was him basically saying for as long as he lives he will not never think about JM. As in he is never not ever keeping away from JM. We might have to pry Jimin from his cold hands! *sigh

Which leads to the radio Vlives moments,

Something Jimin said during his interview with suga caught my attention. He said it was nice that they get to speak with Armies at least like this. I believe all these were putting a lot of stress on Jimin as he has decided to take a break off social media prior to him saying so on this interview. But the wording of that statement also made be believe some thing or someone was preventing him from talking to Armies in the usual manner.

Earlier with RM he had said how he would go crazy if they weren't allowed to do certain things he was used to doing on stage as well. So that also raised a flag to me.

I had a feeling Suga had invited JM on that Radio live to address his 'issues'- including his issues with JK. Jikook have a subtle way of communicating with each other and somehow social media has a huge part in that. They not the only ones, Beyonce and JayZ also addressed their relationship issues through their music, going back and forth yet they lived together. I DONT UNDERSTAND THESE CELEBRITIES!!!

Sorry for the rant. Anyway I had a feeling JK was listening to the radio interview too.

Suga asked JM why he didn't come to his music video set to support him- which I believe he was referring to his Daechwita shoot. JM didn't go because, take a guess...

JK was there too. Lol. He had gone with Jin and even ended up filming a part in the music video. My guess is Jk thought Jimin was gonna be there because he always go to Support Suga and the others in times like that.

So Jimin responds with 'were you expecting me? .... I didn't come because I want you to want me more.' Now that's an absolutely random response don't you think? He couldhave said something logical like he had to record at a studio or something- unless he wasn't talking about Suga but was sending that message to someone else who was listening in. A certain man with a JM tatto ring on his ring finger perhaps??

JM from this response revealed he intentionally missed that shoot. He knew JK would be there and he wanted him to ask where JM was at it he wasn't at the shoot. It's also interesting how during this period JK was spending a lot of time with Jin. When he interrupted JM's Vlive call he was with Jin. He went with Jin to Suga's MV and Jin posted a selca of him and shirtless Jk dieimh this period too while JM was mostly seen with Tae. What does this remind you of??

MANILA. same thing happened when they had that Manila fight. Jin was with JM and we all know who was siding with JK!

Why would JM say he wants to be enacted more? Easy- He a slytherin and a Libra and those two mixed together is sinister. Kidding.

I believe JK intentionally took a step back from JM, to give him the space he wanted and it had JM feeling someway about it. Probably had him feeling JK didn't want him as much anymore. Dude is insecure we been known. He a Libra and a slytherin what y'all expect?

So I'm guessing JM put up the classic textbook attitude towards JK which had JK all confused because he had no idea what their issues were anymore or why his boyfriend was spending his nights at Tae. You want space, you got it. Why you mad?

So JK reaches out to Suga for help. because the intention was fix his relationship not have it plummet. Dude is in love with this man and will do whatever it takes to keep his relationship. *Sigh

Suga comes through for him with the interview. And I think JK put two and two together- literally. He comes up with still with you a few days after JM's interview and does a radio interview with Suga as well.

Now the focus of this interview was his "apology to Armies for his scandal.' But funny, cos his scandal happened a month before the interview. Suga radio had been ongoing after the scandal and yet this man didn't think once to come on it and apologize to Armies about an incident that BigHit had already addressed until JMs interview.

You don't talk about scandals. That's the protocol.

Let me also point out JK has had several scandals in the past of which he had never addressed in a Vlive let alone apologize in that way. Not saying he wouldn't, he hasn't. They themselves don't address scandals unofficially, that's the protocol and he knows it.

If they were allowed to think Armies would be more interested in him addressing the Tatoo gurl scandal not his Friday night happy hours with his friends. That apology was for Jimin not armies.

Also, he pointed out how still with you was written when he was alone in the dark thinking by himself. That sounds to me like something you do when you've had a fight with your boyfriend/girlfriend and they've packed their things and left your shared apartment.

Interestingly, Jk mentioned during Festa the rain fight. Still with you literally has rain drops sounds in the beginning of the song and also on the cover on sound cloud. Seems to me that whatever happened that night had JK reminiscing about times he'd fought with JM- the rain fight. Which is what inspired still with you (I will do a full analysis of that song and others soon here on my blog'

Yea, so he apologized to JM for their fight I guess and said he loves Army. *smirk.

And things started falling into place right after that. They started- Jikooking again. Jk called JM out on Weverse so they start their online flirting thingy- posting immediately after each other, 13, those kinda things

Things seemed good. Untill their Japan interviews when JK said spending time alone pursuing new hobbies was gold to him and JM saying maintaining his relationships with friends and family is good to him. Seems JK is still salty about JM wanting space. It will take sometime for him to get used to not being around JM 24/7. Know what I mean?

I don't think there was major tension there. Just two lovebirds shading eachother. *smirk I mean the passive aggressiveness of it all. Lol

I have a feeling JK will keep jabbing at JM with that because let's face it, he is the emo one in that relationship and most importantly he loves JM with all his being and wants to be with him always. A partner asking for space can feel like they are pushing you away or rejecting you. It triggers a lot of insecurities so I understand JK in that sense. They are both not wrong in my opinion. Space can be a good thing and hey at least JK got to read a whole book during this time! Who woulda thought!

And quiet honestly, if Jikook are real as I believe they are then these issues they are having pales in comparison to the hurdles that lie ahead of them for when they decide to come out or live as a forever couple.

I guess It is why JK put these lyrics in GCF Helsinki at JMs part:

Why do you spend your time leading the chorus,

When the war was just waiting before us?

As if you didn't know

I guess it's sums up what Jikook were dealing with during that period of you take into consideration the fact this was released end of December/ early 2020.

Jimin pays too much attention to what people thinks of their relationship as if he didn't know what he was getting himself into. ...

This has been a long one, chai! Sorry. I get carried away sometimes talking about Jikook. Lol.

So what is the state of their relationship? They good. I been told y'all JK is trying to bring back their old online filtering habits. He did it on Weverse when he posted about him reading and asking what JM was doing forcing JM to come out with a response.

He did the same yesterday when he posted a cover song after JM posted his selca on Twitter. They good. They more than good I believe. I will keep observing and will update y'all with my observations as and when.

Oh and I will be doing an analysis of his new cover may be later tonight. Until then its Jikook forever bishes! Gang, gang, gang,

I'M OUT!

[strongsassysexysloane]

Fifth Day of Twelve - A Perfectly Captured Memory

Well well well this is the most commitment I've had to something in a while. You're welcome LOL.

Click below to read previous days drabbles

. . . .

The snow had really come down over night but you didn't mind. You had gloves now to keep your hands nice and toasty. Even though it was now the weekend in most people's lives, to you, it was just another work day which meant no sleep in whatsoever.

The office was empty when you arrived, typical for a weekend and it was only 0630. You had been up far too early thinking about anything but what gift you would receive today. At least trying to think about anything else. Failing miserably. That was at 0500 and when you saw the snow piled up on the rim of your bedroom window you decided to go in early just in case there was traffic. Had nothing to do with possibly catching the gift giver in the act.

Alas when your eyes found your desk it had something extra sitting beside your phone that definitely wasn't there when you left last night. Unfortunately the potted plant had to go yesterday because it started to smell not so nice.

Once you dropped your backpack underneath, you picked up the photo frame and smiled at the cute family photo inside. It was of the team at Jimmy's birthday party this year. A half decent one before half of you got absolutely sloshed. You were part of that half and so was the woman with her arm curled around your waist, holding you close, her head resting against yours. You of course, had a stupid overly tipsy grin spread across your face. The more.you looked at the photo the more the memory flooded your mind, the taste of bourbon, the warm touch and tight hold of Jack Sloane.

Most days you could keep your emotions under control but that night, the alcohol let them free, just a little. There was dancing, one slow song but you were both too drunk for it to mean anything. You ran your finger over the frame with a smile. His party was so long ago.

That night made it difficult to hold those emotions in check after, you'd tried so hard for the past year putting those feelings for her aside. Someone had pointed out that maybe the failed dates were because no one matched up and that was partly true. No one could but you didn't know how they could match up when you weren't ever a thing to begin with. Oh, how you prayed this was all from her.

You knew Jack was attracted to females, Izzy was easy to get information out of once she was tipsy. Izzy stopped by a few months back to share information on a case much to Jack's dismay but this time she charmed you into drinks. Only for her to get more information on Jack's dating life but in return you got some back story on Jack as well. She, of course, wasn't around to be angry at either of you until the following morning because Izzy had sent her a drunken voicemail.

She was more mad at Izzy for blabbing and curious towards you about why you were so inquisitive. You deflected like you usually did and for once Jack let up.

That was you and Jack. A friendship with questions attached. You knew Jack had asked questions about you a while back. You knew because you'd overhead her talking to Ellie in the ladies room a couple months after you'd joined. It wasn't anything about the job, it was all personal. Ellie had asked you out for Saturday night drinks with her and Nick, everyone else had plans but that didn't stop Jack from getting all the information she wanted. After that you avoided going out with Ellie for a while, it wasn't until she figured it out and promised things would stay between the two of you, that you decided to go drinking with them again. You didn't mind sharing, you just preferred when the person wanting to know asked you face to face which you knew was entirely hypocrital on your part.

Why she didn't ask you or why you couldn't ask her was frustrating. They weren't overly intrusive questions, just getting to know a person's life a bit more. She just made you nervous for some reason.

You almost dropped the photo frame when the elevator doors dinged. It was Gibbs arriving for the day with a cup of coffee in his hand. He frowned at your shocked face and you gave him a one shoulder shrug in response. "Morning."

" 'morning. Another present?"

His question caught you off guard. "Umm..yeah."

"Only gets annoyin' when they harp on about it." He offered a reason to your questioning look. "Got a photo?" He stopped at your desk and looked down at the frame.

You picked it up and faced it towards him. It was a simple light wooden frame with a meaningful picture. "Even has you smiling."

"Might 'ave somethin' to do with the good bourbon Palmer had on tab." He smirked, placing it back down on your desk.

You chuckled. "Was good bourbon." So good that Jimmy didn't realise how many people drank it until he got the bill.

Gibbs nodded and took a swig of his coffee. "Any ideas yet?"

You raised a brow at his follow up but his dead stare just made you chuckle more. "No. I dont-" You didn't want to sound stupid. It seemed like a silly reason.

"Want to ruin the surprise." He nodded and walked over to his desk. It sounded ok when he said it.

"Yeah."

There was silence between you after that. You followed up with the call directory of the victims brother you were working on last night. Praying to find something to go with the no alibi he had for the time of the murder. They were estranged however only lived twenty minutes apart and something in his answers seemed off. Off according to Gibbs and Jack which was something. He just seemed unpleasant when you and Gibbs picked him up yesterday.

The team started to arrive just after and to no one's surprise Ellie was the only one to notice or comment about the frame on your desk. She soon dropped the subject when Jack came whizzing in.

"Guess where I'm jetting off to in a few hours?!" She beamed, bouncing on the balls of her feet with your added enthusiasm.

"Where Jack?" All three of you said in deadpan unison and Gibbs smirked as Jack rolled her eyes. "I don't care if you aren't interested. I'm going to New Orleans." She raised her arms in victory. "It's been so long."

You could tell by her slightly open mouth and glowing eyes that she was thinking about food. "What's first on the menu?"

She laughed and looked down at you. "Depends. I'm going to help Dwayne on a case. He asked for me specifically and Vance actually agreed. So it may be his gumbo or a restaurant between the airport and the office." She shrugged really not caring which option it would be, just that she knew it would be good food.

"Mmmm I can smell it all, already." Ellie hums. She visited the NOLA office earlier in the year, side trip when she went home for a week to Oklahoma. Tammy and Sebastian had finally convinced her to come down for a weekend with the promise of Dwayne's signature dish. She didn't care what it was, she was sold.

"You might need to bring her back something." Nick smirked at Ellie's poked tongue.

"I might just do that."

"Thank you Jack." They both grinned at each other. Ellie was known for her love of food but Jack was a close second in your book.

"Have fun, remember there's a case to solve inbetween food." You smiled wider when she rolled her eyes.

That's when the thought clicked, if Jack wasn't here then you'd finally know if it was her or not. She couldn't surprise you with gifts if she wasn't here and she wouldn't dare tell anyone else it's her.

"Thank you, Y/n. Gibbs, I've got those profiles you asked for yesterday. Follow me." She motioned with her gloved hand for him to join her to her office and he obliged.

She left the office not long after and left Gibbs with another possible lead for the case.

"Grab your gear."

. . . .

Tonight consisted of drinking eggnog, watching Christmas movies while making Gingerbread houses with my roommate. Twas fun. Feeling very festive. Hop everyone has a good weekend!

[c-atm]

“So,” Heartberry started, “anyone has an idea of how to take this thing down cause I’m not crazy about being resprayed.” she leaned back with her legs crossed, sitting on Mister’s lap.

“We can’t ambush it, the thing always on guard, despite having one eye, ” Mister commented as he slumped in their recliner a little, “resilient thing too, just bounce everything off of that plum-colored skin of theirs.”

“I don’t know what to tell you. Never faced anything so docile but, oh so annoying.” Witchy groaned, throwing her hands up in agitation, before folding her arms over her breast, pouting with puffed blush crossed cheeks and steady brows.  

The subject, how to take care of a demon who, despite being non-violent, leaves its victims comatose and foul-smelling.

So very foul-smelling.

They didn't know what it wanted. What's its purpose was, or if it even had one? Furthermore, it wouldn't tell them what it wanted...That or it couldn't. 

There wasn't a mouth on its balloon-like, limbless single-eyed body, an eye that changes colors and showed a whole lot of expression based on its emotions.

It should have been an easy kill, but it did have a high payout for its defeat, for a good reason too.

It has escaped the six of them three times so far. Leaving them all unconscious and reeking. Not even Amy was a fan of the smell. So much so that she chose to abandon the hunt.

Three nights of undertaking this task. 

Three nights of failing the task.

Three nights of smelling like literal defeat. 

Defeat took a ninety-minute bath and shower to scrub off and put everyone on edge, even after a night of sleep.

 None more than the resident witch. 

She woke with her eyes glowed with prideful anger, even as Dapper pampered her a bit, massaging her shoulders and fixing his lady her favorite breakfast, which she did appreciate but was too in her pride to convey it. Still, for the sake of the morning, he let it be.

The afternoon though, things hit their boiling point when they began to plan for their next attempt.

"I think I might have an answer," Dapper came in with a book in his hand. He laid it open to a page with the despicable eggplant looking demon. "Our target defense is related to its focus. The more alert it is, the more invulnerable it is, and believe it or not, it's a bit of a punk...so it's always on alert. Though, you can't really blame it. It's a rare demon and a big payday."

"Ok, so how do we take care of it," Witchy asked with a glare. 

"We have to distract it," Dapper announced with a smirk. "And what is its weakness, you ask." with a smirk, he pointed at a simple two-line description, which the three read.

"AHHH HAHAHA!" Mister threw his head back. "Ohh, well girls, looks like this is a job for you two."

Heartberry shook her head, "I knew it was looking at me strangely...Stop laughing." Her nostrils flared. "So...That's its weakness, so how do we exploit it."

"Photoshoot? Modeling? Music video!?" Mister chuckled, getting a headlock from his Connie.

"You know what? Fine." Witchy said coolly, getting off the couch and taking HB's hand and leading her out the room. "Going to pick up Amy, and we'll see you two in a couple of hours at that demon's base."

"My lady?"

He was answered with a slam of the front door, leaving the 'brothers' looking worried.

Two hours later, Dapper and Mister were waiting in the now abandoned apartment complex, waiting for their team.

"So what'd you think they came up with?" Mister asked, leaning back on a wall, eyes closed and hand in his pockets.

Dapper shrugged, looking a bit crushed." My lady is so damn prideful. Just hope she's not going to do something..Foolish for a win."

"She wouldn't be a 'Connie' if she took it on the chin, definitely if she feels she could win."

"Sis, stubborn as well, hmm?"

"Her most alluring trait." Mister smirked, opening his eyes and turning his head left, "speaking of alluring...Stars and Diamonds." He swooned.

Dapper looked over the same direction as Mister and arched an eye. 

Heartberry, Amethyst, and the duo of Sarah and Biddy strutting towards them.

Dressed in flashy, flirty idol outfits.

Mister whistled as they walked up.

"Keep your eyes and tongue in your head, Mister," Heartberry teased as Mister playfully wrapped her loose plaid tie over his finger. "Schoolgirl style?" 

"Yup, figured since it has a thing for the female form, we decided we'd appease its base emotions."

"I see devious." Mister flirted, "So..are you naughty or nice?" 

"I'll show you later alone." She grinned, giving him a peck.

"Ummm-"

"Yes...Always." The purple demoness answered Sarah's and Biddy's question before they could ask.

"Quite the plan you came up with, ladies," Dapper smirked.

"It was actually trailblazer's suggestion." Sarah started." Alicia would have joined, but she was needed at the church."

"How did you guys get roped into this?" The demon Steven questioned.

"I was promised a piece of the reward and amusement." Biddy announced, plainly, " so far, I am amused."

"Same." Sarah nodded affirmatively.

"Dapper." HB called, getting the demon's attention, "around the corner." 

Dapper didn't need any more than that as she morphed into a shadow, rushing to his lady's side.

He found her standing behind the corner, a cloak over her.

"My lady?"

Witchy leaped, red-face as Dapper formed himself from the darkness. "The hell, Steven. Give me a heart attack, why don't you?"

"Sorry." The half-demon offered, looking at his lady, " So? What are you doing over here?"

"Attempting to preserve my pride." She mumbled, "this is so stupid." She rubbed her temples with a groan before slamming her first to the wall. 

"I really don't get why you are so angry, My lady?"

"I don't like to lose."

"I know." He chuckled

"This demon beat me four times."

"Four? We only confronted it three times."

"I'm not talking just in battle!" She growled." I mean …" Witchy clenched her fist. " You know what, trash the plan."

 "This was your idea!" Shocks evident in Dapper's voice.

"I'm retracting it then!" 

"Why? It's a good plan!"

"Why? I'm not some...Cosplaying, dallying, cutesy, pop-idol, centerfold!!" The fiery witch roared upwards, 

"I'm a demon hunter! A witch! A warrior! A CONNIE MAHESWARAN!!" She continued, a flare of outrage literally coming from her mouth.

"Spitting fire, My lady."

He received a smoke conjuring snort as a response before she turned her back to him, her cheeky face pout returning, even as he interlaced his fingers around her stomach and pulled her to his chest, though it slipped a bit when she felt the rumble of his best from him chuckle on her back.

"Don't you think you're a bit too proud?"

"No! not at all!" She argued. "This thing has made a mockery of us. I mean, come on. Look what we've been subjected to." She groaned, leaning back into him. "Three nights of foul-smelling defeats from this one-eyed demon eggplant that won the genetic lottery in terms of defense and attentiveness, whose weakness is the 'allure of the fairer sex.'  How am I supposed to feel knowing that this was the thing that beat me...Beat us."

"It hasn't beaten us," Dapper looked at his flame. "We're still here, ready to do what we do best."

"But what we do best won't work, as long as it's on guard, we can't kill it, and all we have to do is get sprayed and humiliated again." Witchy retorted, "even against the likes of Stevonnie and Steven squared. It just repels everything before blowing us away in a noxious fume." The witch sighed in chagrin." And to cater to its taste...A demon's taste...How disgraceful."

"That's kind of offensive, Connie," Dapper stated, slightly crossed. "I'm half-demon, you know."

The witch's face flushed, shamed at her callousness. "Sorry, my dapper devil. I didn't mean it like that." She gave him a quick peck. "It's just this whole 'honeypot' plan. It's humiliating."

Sometimes it's a requirement." Dapper joked yet spoke truthfully, "you've been at this job long enough to know that, and you used you womanly wiles before, so why is this so different?"

"Because it might not work, and I don't want to look bad in front of you again, "  Witchy admitted looking down. "Especially against this do nothing demon, who can't attack more than letting out a nauseating gas."

Dapper kissed her crown gently, "My beautiful, prideful flame. You really let this plant sink its roots into you." Dapper laughed a bit before kissing her temple. 

"How are you laughing? How can you find even the most smidge of humor out of this situation?"

"The fact that this plant isn't threatening the populace helps." The demon admitted, "Annoying them to the point of abandoning their home for the time, but at least they're unharmed."

"True, it's more menace than monster, but that makes it all the more shameful." The witch complained, "we've battled true nightmares and won without breaking a sweat, and yet the thing that gave us trouble can't even speak! It's frustrating!"

"Irony at its finest." Dapper jest. 

"I want to win." Witchy declared. " I want to prevail over this creature; I have to..."determination in her voice.

"Well, then. We should join the others. We're holding the op-"

Dapper words fell short as Witchy's lips met his in an appreciative kiss. He was only slightly shocked for a moment before reciprocating. It all lasted a tongue-twisting, cheek caressing, hip holding, lip popping seven seconds before breaking off with a gentle -Chu-.

Dapper, a bit dizzy, turned upwards and breathed out a small heart-shaped fume. "Talk about your hot kisses."

"Pfft!" Witchy snorted before laughing into his chest. Holding him by the shoulder blades as he did. "Thank you," She whispered, adoring.

"For what?"

"Letting me vent, without judgment." She reached up, kissing his left cheek, "For making my favorite breakfast and massaging my shoulders." She kissed his right, "for dealing with my attitude in stride.

"It's no problem, My lady." He soothed, "I know your irritation comes from your convictions, your need never to let your people down." He kissed her forehead, "one of your most attractive qualities."

"Still."

"Still nothing. You are fine, not like you did anything insulting." He grinned, "You were just a sulky little witch."

"And impulsive."  She sighed, " whatever. It is what it is." Witchy surrendered as she walked out of his grasp, peeling off her cloak and making Dapper jaw drop.

She was wearing a dark blue collared crop top with purple plaid trim around the hem and collared with a loose-fitting blue and purple stripe tie, a pair of high thighs navy suspender shorts, some dark purple knee-highs, and black collared booties. Every curve that she hid was on full display, and Dapper was burning the visage in his mind forever.

Reaching to her back left pocket, she pulled out a hair clip shaped like one of Dapper's broaches as well as a tube lip gloss.

"Mind helping me?" She tossed him the tube before clipping her hair in a left side ponytail. Dapper nodded before taking Witchy chin in his left hand and slowly stroked the gloss across pressed the lips, giving them a shimmer. "Hmm, might have given you too much."

Before the witch could complain, her partner gave her a tingling, suckling upon the brims of her mouth.

It was sweet, swift, and soothing, precisely what his lady needed as he felt her relax under his kiss.

"Better?" He asked, reapplying the gloss again, getting a breath of calmness and appreciation.

"Yeah." She felt herself grinning, " you could have asked for a kiss, though."

"True, but kissing 'a idol' off guard was too good to pass." He gave her a playful and wolfish grin, making her blush and push him away.

"Gods no. I'm no idol."

"You're my idol." He whispered, pressing his head to hers.

Witchy pursed her mouth, pouting a bit." Well. I guess that's fine…" she gave him a quick peck. "but only yours."

"Does that mean there is a chance I'd get to see you in this outfit again?"

 "I'm more than likely going to end up burning this attire once we are done." She shrugged, teasing before backing away, turning, and walking towards the corner. "Come on, I'm sure the others are impatient and probably starting to head up to the roof."

"Of course," Dapper said, staring at his lady's confident stride before following behind her; idolizing the prideful fiery witch and all her perfect imperfection, as he always did.

[hellreads]

Thank you for your blog it's really helpful sksjsksj anyway i don't know if you like dark themes(yandere, supernatural, psychological) but if you do what are the best fic you can recommend? Especially Jimin's? Thank you in advance ❤️❤️

hello there lovey! thank you for appreciating my blog, btw I LOVE DARK THEMED FICS and I have read a lot of stories with said theme (yandere and psychological are part of my fave reads), anyways, I will be listing below my favorites for every member, you can also check other fics on my organized shelf in case you’re looking for specific stories xxx | 🍒

Kim Namjoon

❥ Let the Villain Win by @lemonjoonah➴ Author/Yandere!AU | Namjoon x Reader | One-Shot➴ Kim Namjoon, famous author and your childhood friend has been keeping a secret from you. His new book treads on such dark themes that he’s finding it difficult to write. Excited by the prospect of a sinister plot you offer him a piece of advice, “Let the villain win…”

❥ First, Do No Harm by @psycho-slytherin➴ Doctor/Yandere!AU | Namjoon x Reader | One-Shot➴ Dr. Kim is well known as the most skilled heart surgeon in the hospital, but when you notice his mortality statistics seem skewered, you discover all is not what it seems. Now, Dr. Kim is offering you a choice: will you join him? Or become yet another broken heart beneath his scalpel?

❥ A Little Bit of Sugar (but lots of poison too) by @lthyl➴ Noir!AU | Namjoon x Reader | One-Shot➴ Namjoon is well aware that some, well actually most people could find his hobby not exactly common, yet he still considers himself to be a man of tasteful words and higher intellect - someone who managed to understand the true, deepest meaning of beauty itself.

Kim Seokjin

❥ A Portrait’s Whisper by @jimlingss➴ Supernatural!AU | Seokjin x Reader | One-Shot➴ When you’re trapped in a house controlled by a witch’s power, Seokjin will go through every means to search for you again.

❥ Cake by yeyeniejjung➴ Killer/Yandere!AU | Seokjin x Reader | Series➴ “I was always hungry for your love. Just once, I wanted to know what is was like to get my fill of it. I wanted to be fed so much love that I couldn’t take it anymore, just once.”

Min Yoongi

❥ Dead Leaves by wrienne➴ Police/Det!AU | Yoongi x Reader x Jimin | Series➴ In which you (reader) are a homicide detective about to face the biggest hurdle both of your career and life.

Married to probably the kindest but most boring man you’ve ever met and living in a town where nothing ever seems to happen means life for you is dull. Dull enough to drive you crazy with boredom and dissatisfaction. However, life changes abruptly when your old boss retires and a new man takes his place - a man you used to love (and sleep very regularly with) more than a decade ago. Especially when your husband comes home smelling of perfume, you’re unable to resist your more carnal urges and dead women start showing up across the city with unnerving frequency.

Jung Hoseok

❥ Lost and Found by @fortunexkookie➴ Peter Pan!AU | Hoseok x Reader | Series➴ The only hope you had at ending your exile and earning your life back came in the form of an infuriating and uncatchable man: Hoseok. He seemed to love the endless game of cat-and-mouse you two played - so much, in fact, that you were unsure if you were the cat or the mouse. What he failed to realize was that there was a third player, and this one wasn’t after him. The Crocodile hunted you with an intensity that rivaled the way you chased Hoseok, but with one difference: the games he played were deadly.

❥ Taken at Dusk by @yeontanismypresident➴ Hybrid/Yandere!AU | Hoseok x Reader x Jungkook | Series ➴ The moment you sauntered into the party, his gaze was locked in on your form. Everywhere you went, his eyes followed along, not wanting to lose you in the huge crowd of sweaty bodies. There was something about you that drove his instincts wild. Was it your scent? Your attitude? The manner in which you held yourself? He didn’t have a clue and he couldn’t have cared less, so long as you were his and his only. And he would do anything to make that happen.

❥ Red Door, Yellow Door by @polaritae➴ Supernatural/Incubus!AU | Seokjin x Reader x Hoseok | One-Shot➴ In hindsight, maybe going into a trance to communicate with the spirit world was a bad idea.

Park Jimin

❥ Eradicate by @gukptune➴ Purge!AU | Jimin x Reader | One-Shot➴ A hotel intern finds himself trapped between death and lust.

❥ Neighbors by @jkeuphoriadreamland➴ Neighbors/Yandere!AU | Jimin x Reader | Series➴ Finally achieving your successes in life you never expected the distraction that came with your new hot neighbor. He however, had been trying to get your attention for a much different reason.

❥ Otherworldly by @sinning-on-a-sunday➴ Coraline!AU | Jimin x Reader | Two-Shot➴ When you discover a tiny door in your home that leads to a much better version of your own life, it seems too good to be true. little do you know, the man posing as your boyfriend may be a lot more dangerous than you care to admit. and he is not intent on letting you leave.

❥ The Uncanny by sinsirella➴ Stalker/Yandere!AU | Jimin x Reader | Series➴ “The uncanny is the psychological experience of something as strangely familiar, rather than simply mysterious.” An everyday object or occurrence can be experienced as something unsettling and alienated. This is accompanied by a discomforting effect and—most of the time—leads to an outright rejection of said subject. Or Someone.(Y/N) is a young girl whose Life turns upside down. One day her mother surprises her with news of her arranged husband, forcing her into her new chaotic lifestyle. Join her journey and experience her new life through her eyes. Will she get along with her husband? Or someone else? What are they hiding?

❥ Nine-One-One by @yminie➴ Det/Killer!AU | Jimin x Reader | Series➴ When murder and crime threaten the city of Seoul, there’s a team in place to help keep the public safe, but just what do you do when all your training is to help others, and the one that needs help is actually you?

❥ Devotion by @sugaxjpg➴ Angel/Demon!AU | Jimin x Reader | One-Shot➴ As an angel questioning your place in Heaven, the last thing you needed was for someone like him to appear.

❥ The Devil’s Own Luck by @jimlingss​➴ Demon!AU | Jimin x Reader | One-Shot➴ You should’ve known that opening that box would’ve made your luck go rotten. And not only that, but a certain demon would end up following you for the rest of your days. Introducing the devilish boy - Jimin! Your childhood best friend from the underworld who will never leave your side!

Kim Taehyung ( I read a lot of dark fics for Taehyung so just check my shelf)

❥ Beastly Gods by @lemonjoonah​➴ Hybrid/Yandere!AU | Taehyung x Reader | One-Shot➴ ‘Don’t leave the forest,’ a rule that you’ve been forced to follow since birth, but you are tired of living in this wooden cage. Out of desperation you cut a deal with Taehyung, who claims to be the only one who can get you out safely, even though he might be just as dangerous as the god you’re trying to escape.

❥ Minutiae by coconutty ➴ Stalker!AU | Taehyung x Reader | Series➴ Y/N meets a mysterious and alluring photographer and wants to interview him. Along the way things start getting a bit strange. What happens when you draw the attention of someone who always gets what they want?

❥ L’Appel Du Vide by @infireation​➴ Killer!AU | Taehyung x Reader | Series➴ //

Jeon Jungkook (I read a lot of JK dark fics too so pls just check my shelf)

❥ Only You by @sweetbunnykook (+ all of her stories!!!)➴ Lovers/Yandere!AU | Jungkook x Reader x Namjoon x Jin | Series➴ Jeon Jungkook, your wedding photographer, helps you escape on your big day upon learning about a secret your groom-to-be kept hidden. You soon fall for this young, passionate photographer. However, you underestimated just how much he was willing to reciprocate that love. Maybe, you think, he’s loving you just a little too much.

❥ Every Breath You Take by @junqkook​➴ Stalker/Yandere!AU | Jungkook x Reader | Series➴ Everything was going great when you first met jeon jungkook. he was a new light in your life with soft smiles and tinkling laughs; but then you noticed a lurking presence that seemed to follow you wherever you went.

❥ Lust by @umitae➴ Stalker/Killer!AU | Jungkook x Reader | Series➴ Everybody has a lust for something. but his lust was beyond the ordinary one. his lust for you was out of this world. he only wanted you and in order to make you his, everything had to go his way.

OT7 (so all possible dark tags apply to these stories so please please please check all tags and warnings before reading!!!)

❥ Extreme Obsession by saylilirose➴ Psychological/Poly!AU | OT7 x Reader | Series➴ In life, you meet one person that you live and grow old with. You? You meet seven. But your love? Non-existent. But theirs? Real…and obsessive.Which turns deadly and dangerous. Without hesitation.

❥ The Scarlet Lust by infires_fanfic➴ Vampire!AU | OT7 x Reader | Series➴ Your world becomes turned upside down as a series of unfortunate events places you directly in the hands of a clan of blood-thirsty vampires, where you become their one and only human servant. Filled with uncertainty, strange emotions and many questions, what truths will you uncover? Are your new keepers the intimate form of evil incarnate, or is there humanity hidden beneath the surface of their statuesquely beautiful faces?

[traincat]

I like MCU Spider-Man, but I agree with nearly all of your critiques. The 3rd film will have the same director and writers, so I don't expect the problems to be fixed, but I'm curious: do you think MCU Spider-Man is salvageable? If you could be completely in charge, how would you write the story and fix the problems?

Yeah, I don’t really expect the problems to be fixed in the third film, no matter how many times they promise it’s going to be something “different.” If I’m honest, besides the incredibly weak scripts, I think a big part of the problem is that Jon Watts is a bad director for a Spider-Man project. Which, to be fair, I think is actually why he was hired – he’s got a pretty short list of credits under his name. I mean, “Cop Car”? “Clown”? Nothing about his repertoire suggests he was going to give the studio the kind of artistic pushback they have a history of receiving from their more experienced directors. He’s basically the director version of Jell-O – easy to mold and bland to boot. The perfect guy to direct a car commercial I mean mainstream superhero film. 

This is actually part of the reason I’m disappointed that the Sony-Marvel rights deal ended up sticking after all. I think that if the film rights had reverted entirely back to Sony, there might have been some damage control. We know that they intended to keep Tom Holland, if not the whole cast, for at least one more movie even if the rights had reverted entirely back to Sony so I don’t really get what the raising of arms was about. The rights reversion would’ve cut the apron strings with the rest of the MCU which would have been good, forcing both this Spider-Man to stand on his own two feet within his own narrative and also forcing the movie to focus solely on Spider-Man and on his cast. Sony’s recent Spider-Man films as of the time of writing this (I no idea what the hell they’re gonna do with Morbius and I don’t really care) have dealt with some element of “corporations are evil” – Oscorp pulling the strings in TASM/2 and Venom’s whole entire deal – and I would really like to see this version of Spider-Man be thrust into a plot where that’s the reality and that’s something he has to deal with and where he’s actually forced to defend normal people not just against a costumed villain with a grudge but against an entire system that is set up to exploit and abuse the vulnerable. I think that would have gone a long way towards if not fixing the damage inflicted upon the narrative, then at least course correcting it for the future. But that’s not happening now so whatever.

I find it kind of hard to think of what I would do if I was handed complete control of MCU Spider-Man with the caveat that I had to go forward using the two previous films as my background just because I dislike so many of the choices they made so much. On the other hand, I do like money and inflicting my own opinions on a captive audience, so. I think I would want to scale back the stakes a lot – keep Peter in New York for the entirety of the movie’s plot and film mostly there if at all possible. I would want to cute the ties to all Iron Man cast members so sorry, Jon Favreau, but you’re out, while at the same time redirecting the film’s focus into something more oriented in Peter’s civilian community. Bringing in a character like Leo Zelinsky, a Holocaust survivor who works as a tailor specializing in super-clients, would be a really good way to give Peter and the audience a personal connection to Peter’s Queens community while also tying this Peter back to the Jewish subtext of Spider-Man, and it could work in a plot where cut the Iron Man cast – this Peter isn’t an experienced craftsman when it comes to creating his own costume, so bringing in Leo Zelinsky would make sense, and a costume created by the both of them could be quite meaningful if it was played out well. 

I would definitely want to give May Parker much more screentime and rework her relationship from the “big sister” role (the writers’ words, not mine) to that of Peter’s mother, someone who realistically worries about the dangers of Spider-Man but also provides a strong moral backbone for him. I’d want to establish the exact circumstances of Ben’s death – I don’t know exactly what I’d do, but given this Peter’s development has failed to track with most other Peters I would definitely want to switch Ben’s death up somehow to kind of shed some light on that. Peter and May would have to talk about him. I would definitely want to bring Peter’s classic college friends group closer together, starting with Peter and Flash since I really like Tony Revolori as an actor. I find this MJ to be an incredibly inscrutable character, and not in a good way, so I’d want to shed some better light on her, her family circumstances, and what makes her tick. I’d bring Liz back and give her some of her comic counterpart’s fire (perhaps literally, given Ultimate Liz’s Firestar status) and also I’d get Betty’s actress a brunette bob stat. There would definitely be a bigger focus on women and on Peter navigating complicated friendships with women, not just letting him have a romantic interest and that’s the end of that. I’m very conflicted on what to do with Ned Leeds because I think Jacob Batalon has some of the best screen presence of that cast, but I find it hard to get past the “Ganke Lee with a minor Peter antagonist’s name pasted on him” aspect of the character. Honestly? I might rework Ned’s role to go full villain, skipping directly to the Hobgoblin with the shadow of the Green Goblin and the Kingpin behind him. That would solve my problem of wanting to give Batalon massive amounts of screen time and a big role but absolutely detesting the reworking of Ned Leed’s into the best friend sidekick position. I would say I’d want Ned to then have a romantic subplot with a young Richard Fisk, who would be here for some reason (it’s not like it’s the worst continuity crime the MCU would have ever committed) but I don’t want yet another Disney’s first ever gay character spotlight moment to be given to the villains, so. It would take some finangling. Maybe I would reinvent Aunt May’s one time fiance Nathan Lubensky as a woman so we’d have some nice balance.

And we defend not one single bank within the movie.

Alternatively, I go mad with the power and reveal that this entire cast is made up of clones created by the Jackal, thus explaining all the Ben Reilly-inspired costumes, and subject everyone to my five movie Clone Saga adaptation dreams.

What I would really want to do given full creative control and being told I could wipe the slate clean and restart Spider-Man within the MCU, no questions asked, would be to have Peter as a retired superhero who was active underground years and years before Iron Man or the Avengers were ever on the scene, and have his daughter Mayday be the young teenage Spider-Man of the MCU, someone fresh and new who carries her father’s legacy while living in a world saturated by the Avengers legacy.

Or I’d just kill Peter and bring in a great team to do a Miles movie. I maybe think about this theoretical where I can get my claws into things a lot.

[sweetfirebird]

Is Hottie Scotty and Mr. Porter your response to the straight women who read gay male romance but don't try to understand the community irl? Sorry if I phrased that badly. I think you mentioned something similar once about some readers wanting more heteronormative-type(?) relationships. I just wanted to ask because I also think about this in regards to Japanese yaoi (not bara I think) manga and who it's written for.

Hottie Scotty and Mr. Porter is a response to a specific group of specific (straight) women who read (and write) gay romance. Or I should say, m/m romance, which is a distinct thing from gay or queer romance. Some of the things Kathy says were things some of these women actually said. 

I don’t... people read things for different reasons. I read some yaoi back in the day. I read weird slash in the early internet days. I think I was attracted to the subject matter for maybe reasons of titillation but also for personal reasons that I didn’t think about or examine then. Like, regular het romances were not emotionally compelling for me for some reason hmm hmmm what could that reason be??? etc... So I try not to judge people for reading what they read, in that sense. Even the trash het romances. Like, growing up, our house was full of terrible 80s and 90s Harlequins and other romance novels where in A LOT of them, the man and woman have some affair or one night of passion (her first! her only! etc) and he leaves and she discovers she is pregnant and doesn’t tell him etc etc etc and then eventually he comes back and discovers and grovels and takes care of her and the baby/child. etc etc etc. Why did we have those in our house? Imagine my mother back in the day getting knocked up and being left on her own and reading this trash as like. wish fulfillment. Or whatever. 

My point being (she did stop reading those eventually.) people sometimes like nonsense for particular reasons. (They may or may not have examined those reasons yet. )

I do, however, judge people who think like, watching “lesbian” porn gives them the right to objectify and be gross to actual wlw, or teen girls embarrassing/traumatizing teen boys who might be gay or questioning because they think it’s “cute” or entertainment. Or adult women who make a living writing romances between two men and then treat real life mlm with disdain. 

Small side point: Romances... are not real life. The nature of romances is that they are always a little bit fantasy. (The orgasms, for one example.) M/m romances have... a lot of rules/tropes that I didn’t realize when I started trying to write it (I immediately failed, btw. My first m/m romance was Let There Be Light. So.... idk what I thought the genre was, but I was Not It. lol) And a lot authors have debated the ins and outs and rights and wrongs of how m/m does gay relationships. I am not here to discuss that right now (But the statement that m/m romance does not generally feature much of the queer community is... pretty correct from what I’ve read of it. That it is also mostly written for straight women might also be true, but I have no stats to back that up. I am not sure anyone does).

I am just reiterating that anyone, much less outsiders to a community, writing books featuring members of that community, should be fucking respectful of the real life members of that community. And these women were not. 

So I showed them as the shallow, racist, bigoted, limited imagination villains that they are. 

Cuz fuck ‘em. 

[imbackmrstark]

Cemetery Secrets

warnings: huge age difference (because Tony is a vampire, duh.) -> No explicit age mentioned , smut , blood... smut and blood , mention of killing , grammatical shit because I'm an idiot, hi :) (I really hope I have everything)

The ground was soft like clouds, his feet sank slightly in the green of the forest; moist moss, wet from the dawn- and rain of the previous evening. His tender hand clung to one of the tree trunks, he let his eyes wander around, looking for the cemetery, where he often just sat and thought. A tear glittered in the corner of his eye and his mouth went straight. He had failed, lost and screwed up. Just everything. And now he couldn't even find his favorite place again, so confused and lost in his endless thoughts. He couldn't think clearly. He took a deep breath, trembled uncontrollably, and closed his eyes.

Calm down, Peter. Just briefly return to yourself and rethink the situation.

The cool air whipped around his nose and ears, filled his lungs with clear oxygen, showed him how lively he was. He was alive with flesh and blood, but something was bothering him. Peter's eyes opened slowly, looking at the hand he raised at eye level. It was slightly red from the cold; Peter wanted to get away from home so quickly that he didn't even have time to put on a jacket. He felt bad that he had left May alone... alone with the police and the hearse that picked up his uncle, her husband. He could still hear the shot that took his uncle's life... and his too. He couldn't just come back like that, his aunt would blame him. He was guilty, he knew that, he said that. The tear in his eye finally got his freedom and ran down his cheek, but was quickly wiped away by Peter's sleeve. The tear was no longer given time to live, like his uncle. At the thought Peter narrowed his eyes and let the other tears run free. He sobbed, sank to the ground, and pressed his face into his palms; Everything was just too much for him right now - the cold, the wet, the death of his uncle, the sound of steps a few meters behind him.... the sound of steps a few meters behind him?? Peter jerked his head up and stared wide-eyed behind him into the light darkness. He noticed a figure that seems to be watching him. A cold shiver ran down his back as he stood up unsure – keeping his eyes on the person – and walked backwards. The boy bit his lip hard before turning and running away, looking for the cemetery because he knew exactly where the good hiding places were. The steps behind him were muffled by the moss, and yet he could hear everything very clearly; thanks to the echo of the forest. His legs flew over the floor as he ran for his life. Fear crept up in him - he didn't want to die, not like that. His steps echoed through the forest, like the bell of the church through the city, animals raised their heads when they heard the frightened boy from far away, they also ran. Peter's lungs burned like fire, electrified all his muscles, from fingertips to toes, spurred him to run even faster. The place of the dead jumped into the corner of his eye, causing Peter to change course and head in the direction of it. He was already on state property when he lost his balance and fell forward. A soft scream escaped his throat and he put his arms protectively around his head, already preparing for the impact, which however did not take place. Instead, two strong arms closed around his torso, holding him and pressing his back against a unfamiliar body. Peter held his breath and didn't move another inch.

"You again, little boy. Who actually allowed you to disturb my home?" There was something calm about the voice, every word was carefully rolled over the tongue and gave Peter goose bumps that slowly spread in all directions on his body. Peter's mouth opened, but no sound left it, just a shaking breath that rose into the sky as a small cloud. Even if Peter knew what to answer, he couldn't make a sound, the situation was so incredibly unrealistic and confusing. The boy wanted to collapse now and lose consciousness, but he was too afraid for that - fear of what would happen to him. A whimper slipped out of him. "I asked you something."

Peter swallowed hard, clawed himself lightly on the stranger's arms, whom he hadn't been allowed to look at before. "I..- Please.. don't hurt me.."

"Oh, I have no reason for it.. not yet. So what are you doing here, kid?" It didn't seem to bother the man that the boy was tearing apart half of his arm, because he just pressed him closer to him and.. smelled him? "Mhh.."

"It.. I'm sorry. I'll never come back, I swear! Please let me go, please!" He tried to lean forward to escape the man, but he didn't seem to be happy with it, because he growled slightly and held him even more tightly.

"So much fear in such a small body, incredibly fascinating, don't you think so?" Peter nodded quickly, bit his lip painfully, and whimpered loudly, hoping to be heard by someone. "You don't have to be afraid, my little one. I won't do anything to you, do you hear? I'll take care of you, that's for sure. Mhhh... mhh.. hmm.." He started to hum softly. "I've been watching you for a while now, you know? I'm really sorry for your uncle."

"Was that you? Did you shoot him?" Peter didn't care for the tears running down his cheeks again. "Are you after me now? Are you going to shoot me too?"

The man sighed softly. "You really weren't listening, were you? I said, I'll protect you. The two guys? I already- They weren't too tasty, believe me."

"Tasty.. what?" What exactly did he mean? The boy felt the grin on the back of his neck and the beard hairs that tickled him there slightly. This feeling was so strange that Peter wanted to turn around and punch him in the face. Peter pushed himself away from the stranger with full force, turned quickly, stumbled back, when he saw the man for the first time, and fell painfully with his ass on the ground, his eyes were huge.

The man was snow white, his eyes red like the roses in May's garden, lips pale and rough, dark circles at least as dark as the night in summers, and the scariest thing: blood that ran down the corner of his mouth. Peter couldn't believe his eyes. It was almost like there was-

"-a vampire standing in front of you?" His grin widened as he approached the frightened boy, who tried to pull away with all his might without taking his eyes off him. "Give me your name and I'll tell you about me."

"P-Peter.. Peter Parker.."

The man sat down at one of the gravestones and, with a brief gesture, made it clear that Peter should join him, which he did, but only with a safe distance. The boy pulled his legs close, put his arms around them and stared at the stranger, waiting for him to start. His pale hand hesitantly scratched his beard, wondering how to start the best without completely disturbing the little one and chasing him away. Peter swallowed hard, followed every single movement of the adult with his eyes, just didn't want to lose sight of him, for fear that he might hurt him. Of course, he could have tried to run away, but he was too curious and wanted to know who the man was- what he was. So at least he gave him a little chance and sat down, he said himself that he wouldn't kill him, right? And yet he was tense, couldn't sit back and listen intently, he was vigilant all the time, ready to jump up and run away.

"I like your eyes. The shadow makes them as dark as a bear's fur, but the sun.. honey in amber with the soft glitter of life. They are beautiful." Peter jerked out of his thoughts, raised his head and widened his eyes, making the stranger smile gently. "As I said.. beautiful."

"Y-You.. N-No, that's not the point, don't distract from the subject! You said that-" A small cry escaped Peter when the man suddenly knelt a few inches in front of him and touched his cheek with the palm of his hand. Shortly before, he was sitting in front of him with a huge distance and he hadn't let him out of his sight for a single second. How the hell could he be at his site so quickly; Touch him and share his smell. Peter's eyes became wet with fright and he suddenly felt very sick and dizzy. It was absolutely not human. "H-How..?"

"Look me in the eyes.. I want to see the lovely glow in them again." The cold thumb pushed up to his cheekbones, he wiped the wetness off there and then smiled broadly, so that two white fangs flashed out. The brown-haired sniffed softly and followed the request, albeit a little shy and fearful, especially after he noticed the vampire teeth. "My name is Tony. Tony Stark."

"You are a -.. This is impossible.. It doesn't work, biological alone and genetics, how.. how.. how..?" He whispered in panic, broke eye contact, and looked for something else to focus on. It's just a dream.. just a stupid dream.

"So a scientist, mh? You can't explain everything with biology and whatever. Little humans don't understand some things. Everything you don't know is impossible right away, right?" Tony roughly took the boy's chin between his fingers and turned his head back towards him. "So clever and yet so ignorant.. Almost sweet."

The smaller one whimpered pleadingly, tried to remove the fingers, they hurt and just didn't want to leave. "Please stop.. You hurt me, please." The pressure eased and the fingers slid down to his jaw and then on to his neck, where they remained very delicate.

"Sorry darling, I'm just so incredibly distracted by the blood that rushes through your veins.. I'd love to have a bite-"

"NO!" Peter hit the man in the face out of reflex, slid back as far as possible, just wanted to run away, but then he was already grabbed by the ankle and pulled back. "PLEASE, HELP! DOES ANYONE HEAR ME?! HELP! Please.."

"Be quiet. Nobody hears you here anyways, okay? Everything's okay, come here.. Let's calm down first, right?" Peter looked into Tony's with his already reddened eyes, lost himself in the blood moon red. His breath calmed faster than usual and he even let the other touch him again.

"Can you influence feelings in any way? Like Jasper from Twilight..? Are you like a Twilight v-vampire?" He bit his lower lip and fell silent, so as not to say more unsettled stuff.

"So I'm supposed to glitter in the sunlight like a disco ball on LSD? I'm really offended, Peter, seriously." The person addressed giggled softly and cocked his head. So Tony took this with humor, knowing well. "And no, I'm not Jasper. As I said, my name is Tony Stark and the only thing that could calm you down would be my eyes, the voice, the gentle touch and the radiance of immortality."

"How old are you Tony?"

"I stopped counting. We all did."

"We all? Are there more vampires? More of your kind?" Peter sat up straight, looked at the hand that was still on his ankle and reached for it.

"Of course." Tony watched the boy carefully as he grabbed his fingers and took them in his hand and held them. A smile played around the corner of the man's mouth. So in a way, the teenager was looking for closeness.

"Are they like you?"

"Not all of them are as open-minded as I am. They stay away from any social action and if a little human comes near them, I am sent out. Some of them hate the human race, are constantly on the hunt. You can be glad that I took you under my wing. If Bucky had caught you.. believe me, you don't want that." Out of nowhere, Tony's head shot up and he looked into the vastness of the cemetery before slowly pressing the boy against his body and putting his arms around him. "Everything's fine. Come here, introduce yourself." The vampire spoke softly into the darkness to which Peter's eyes darted. A broad figure emerged, his gaze fixed on the human being.

"Stark, is this the kid you talk about so often? Human, I smell him all the way over here.. How can you keep control like that?" The new stranger had mutt blonde hair, was also pale, white as snow and his red eyes shone directly into his soul. A cold shiver ran down the boy's shoulder. At first glance, the guy was just muscle and strength, looked like he could just lift him up and tear him to pieces. Trusting Tony wasn't easy, even though he looked like a nice man, but the new one? Oh hell no. He scared Peter. "He's afraid."

"Of course he is, if you arrive here like this and open up like: ,,If I don't like him, I'll just kill him.,, So be nice, sit down and introduce yourself to him, Cap. The way decent guys do that, understand?" The man followed Tony's request a few seconds later and sat a few feet in front of Peter. The moment the stranger touched the ground, Tony released the boy in his arms so that he could sit properly again.

"I am Steve Rogers." He didn't look at him and it looked like he was trying desperately to hold something back, he bit his cheek inside, made only very slow movements and clawed the grass with one hand. "Damn it, Stark, how can you sit so close to him and not press your fangs into him. I can smell him up to here and can hardly control myself."

"Years of self-control, contact with humans and a short previous lunch. I know it's not easy, but if you want it, you can do it, right?" Peter looked from one man to another, completely distraught, and already had a plan for how he could best escape from there. He's so small and skinny, not even a snack.

"Maybe I should go.." It was almost a whisper, but both men raised their heads and curled their eyebrows.

"I don't think so, my dear."

"You know about our existence, you won't get out of here alive. We play with our food here, so to speak."

"Steve, no." Peter widened his eyes, almost choked on his own spit, before quickly looking at Tony, who was just shaking his head. "Peter, calm down.. I won't let them hurt you, I've already told you that."

"As soon as Buck sees him-"

"As soon as I see who?" A man stood out of nowhere next to Steve with long brown hair and a bad-tempered facial expression. He must have used his vampire speed to get here so fast. Peter's eyes widened a lot, because only now he realized who was standing with them. The one in front of him was Bucky, the man Tony had been talking about, the one who detested humans and- "Ohh this who. Hey there." The guy grinned mischievously and kneeled in front of the little boy, his head cocked. "You smell delicious, doll"

The next thing that fell over Peter's lips was rash and quiet, but it was worth it for the man's expression afterwards. "Hello Bucky.."

Tony's flat hand bumped against Bucky's chest as he tried to get closer to the boy. Bucky's eyebrows contracted and a kind of hiss left his throat, his fangs flashed out. "Don't you dare." Tony's eyes took on a darker color and veins appeared under them. For a short while the two just looked into each other's eyes and in the background Steve was ready to intervene at any time while Peter was frozen in shock.

"Let go of me, asshole." One last growl, before Tony let go of the other one and pushed Peter with another movement behind him to protect him. "Oh man, fuck you, seriously, give the boy over and let me look at him, I won't do anything, I promise... okay, maybe nibble a little, but really nothing else, I won't kill him, I swear it." Peter made a quick decision to trust the stranger and crawled out from behind Tony Stark. Steve inhaled sharply, while the brown-haired man next to him almost forgot to breathe, if he even had to do it, because he's a vampire, duh. "Look closely Stark, the boy is cheating on you right now."

"Peter.."

"It's okay.. it's okay. He promised it, I trust his words." The little boy was pulled to the long-haired man by the upper arm and examined like a lunch.

"He's cute but a little bit small. What makes that heavenly smell, Stark, mh? What's the reason?" In the corner of his eye, Peter saw Tony shake his head unknowingly and then look away, while Steve sat down next to Bucky to tear the teen away from him in an emergency.

"I often eat strawberries.. maybe that's why.." Peter carefully raised his hand and took one of the dark strands of hair from the vampire into it, making him chase away in confusion.

"Aren't you afraid?"

"You gave me your word.. And Tony 'n' Steve wouldn't let that happen.."

"I like you. Let's keep him, yes, Steve? Can we?"

"He's mine." Tony spoke up, put his hand around Peter's torso and pressed him to his body.

It quickly became clear that there was much more of their kind, because many red eyes stared at him as he entered the house in the woods, close to Tony's side. Steve and Bucky went ahead to announce the visitor and make sure no one attacked him.

A man with wrinkles on his face was the first to come up to him and stretched out his hand to introduce himself with a big smile. "Hi, Clint Barton my name, but of course you can call me Hawkeye like everyone else here. You're Peter right? Now I know what the metal arm was talking about.. wow your smell is really tempting."

"Metal arm?" Peter looked up questioningly at Tony, who had rolled his eyes and sighed loudly.

"James Barnes aka Bucky." Steve did the talking for Mr. Stark and briefly explained the connection. "My friend lost his arm in the war and it was replaced by a metal arm. The story behind it is a little.. it doesn't matter. Look..-" The blonde man grabbed the other's left arm and pulled his sweater sleeve up a little so that silver metal flashed out. "..-metal." He tapped it with his knuckles.

"Truly tragic, yes.. never mind. I am Natasha Romanoff, Clint's best friend and probably one of the only ones who has never called him Hawkeye." She smiled slightly. "Hi Peter."

"Hello.." The lady had red hair and a really friendly charisma towards him, but Tony seemed to have a lot of respect for her, every blind man could see that. Peter also smiled slightly, bit his tip of the tongue in the meantime, and then pushed himself to the side of the man like a little boy. He had always been shy, but near her, his confidence was much lower and he could barely say a word, she had such an aura.

"This human is very sweet, I can like him." A man with long blond hair, leaning against one of the walls and holding a bottle of beer, looked down at him.

"This is Thor, son of Odin. He is a god. But also a vampire-"

"So a god vampire? That's awesome !" Peter interrupted Tony when he tried to explain who the guy up there was. He quickly closed his mouth and immediately bowed his head, apologetically moving away from Tony's side and peering up at him. "I mean.. I'm sorry. Keep talking."

"Stay quiet, Stark, it's my turn. Hey, I'm Wanda. Nice to meet you." The girl had a Russian accent and red hair too, but it went a little orange and was longer than Natasha's.

The next moment there was a new blond boy next to her, he seemed to be faster than the others. "And I'm her brother. Pietro." A big grin crept onto the Russian's face. "And I'm the fastest of them all."

"Unfortunately, I have to agree." Another person spoke, stepped away from the table, and looked up from his book.

Peter looked exactly into two green eyes, which made his head askew.

"Why are your eyes green?"

"Because he's the Hulk. He's going to be a big green monster."

"He doesn't look like a monster."

"He's the complete opposite of me, kid. I'm more or less happy about that. As long as I have my anger under control, everything is fine." The guy put his book down and leaned against the table next to a dark-skinned man with an eye patch. "By the way, my name is Bruce Banner. I'm the genius here, alongside Tony Stark, of course. And next to me is our boss, so to speak. Nick Fury, but he prefers to be called Fury. And don't ask him about his eye patch, he doesn't like that very much. Above all.. don't make any pirate hints."

"Aii Aii Captain." The vampires around him started laughing, apparently they liked Peter's humor. Even this Fury had a slight grin on his face, though he tried to hide it. "So.. yes.. I'm Peter Parker and-"

"-he belongs to me, so if I see any of you in dangerous proximity to him, I'll kill that person. Have I made myself clear?" Tony stepped next to Peter, put an arm around his shoulder blades and a hand on the shoulder to hold him close. "Everything about him is mine. Do you understand Bucky?"

"Alright, shut up." The long-haired vampire rolled his eyes in exasperation and grabbed the blonde's hand next to him. "Come on Steve, I'm hungry, let's find something tasty."

"Yes Mr. Captain America, take your friend and get out of here." Peter looked up at Tony and curled his forehead in confusion. "Why are you so mean?" In the background Peter could hear Natasha giggling slightly, this performance was probably very funny for her. A kid embarrassed Tony Stark. Yes, it was funny.

"I- What? Bucky is insulting me all the time and I'm supposed to be mean? That's a joke, isn't it?" Tony turned Peter by the shoulders so that he was right in front of him and could look him in the face.

"Bucky can do that. Bucky's cool."

"Hah, awesome. High Five, doll." The guy with the metal arm jumped to Peter's side, raised his arm, and held out his hand for the boy until he hit it. Then he dragged his friend outside and they were suddenly gone.

"You are such a little cheater, remember that... Well, off to the basement, I'll show you my room." The brown-haired man turned the boy around and pushed him towards a door while Thor waved him with his beer in the hand. When the door opened, Peter could see a flight of stairs that he went down without further thought.

"If this is supposed to be a murder, please be painless, thanks." The door behind him was closed and footsteps were audible, as well an airy laugh.

"Don't worry, it will be gentle."

"Oh well, thank you. May I choose the way of death?" When they reached the bottom, the smaller one turned around and looked hopefully up at Tony. A second later he was pressed against the wall behind him, the man's face a few millimeters in front of him, causing his breath to stop.

"I'm sorry, unfortunately not. Don't worry.. very gently.." The vampire bowed his head to Peter's neck and inhaled sharply, before pressing his lips gently against his skin. The brown honey eyes closed and a soft gasp escaped his throat.

A short time later Peter landed on the big bed, which was in the corner of the room and was really comfortable. The boy crawled to the pillows, then leaned on his forearms while staring at the man with his mouth open. He lowered his head and ran one of his hands to the other side of the neck to hold him there, while his lips kissed the skin gently and carefully.

"Don't stop.." Peter's thin fingers slid into Tony's hair, pushing him even closer, before he dropped back and pressed the inside of his legs against the man's waist. "That feels good.."

"Yeah it does, right? Do you want more?" The teenager nodded quickly, put his arm around Tony's neck and pulled him closer to him.

A few seconds later, Peter felt an incredibly beautiful, yet painful feeling on his neck and the movement of suction that made him moan. He dropped his head back and closed his eyes. He quickly understood what Tony was doing there, but he just let him. What should he do anyways? He wasn't even nearly as strong or fast, and it felt so good to be used. He made an unhappy sound when Tony finally had to let go of him. His fingers pressed briefly against the place where the man had bitten before, then lifted up in front of him to see the blood on his fingertips.

"I'm sorry.. you're just so delicious. I wish you could try it.." Peter didn't wait a moment, before he put his fingertips against his lips and licked them with his tongue. He felt the iron taste in his mouth, grinned slightly and looking directly into Tony's eyes, who looked like he was much paler than before. "Oh fuck.."

Mr. Stark grabbed the wrist of the boy beneath him and yanked it away, before pressing his lips to those of Peter, who greedily returned the kiss and lifted his torso up. What was he doing here? This morning the man was a complete stranger to him and now he was fooling around like a little whore. And yet- "Please.. More.. I want more, bite me sir, do it."

"I can't.. I don't want to kill you, I promised.." Instead of giving Peter what he wanted, the man rolled over onto his back to pull the little one onto his chest. "Tell me about the roses."

"What roses?"

"That make your heart bloom for a murderer."

"Idiot, be silent."

"Make me."

The brown-haired boy with the honey brown eyes smiled quietly, put his small hand on Tony's lightly haired cheek and pressed his lips to his. Tony leaned forward, showing affection and all his touches to the human. It was nice to feel some love, it always was.

"Please..", came from him as he detached himself a bit from Stark. "I want more.."

"I can't. I'm sorry. We should go upstairs. I'll give you something to eat and-"

"-you could take me on the counter, right?"

"No. The others are still there.. They are probably listening all the time and.. maybe we really shouldn't go up.. That could prevent a lot of embarrassment." Tony scratched the back of his head with a grin, but Peter just stuck his tongue back into his throat.

"So are you taking me here and now?"

"No, I won't, my little rose."

"I'm your little rose? Naww.." Peter kissed the whole face of the adult, rolled onto his entire body and stayed there for now.

"You're everything."

Some time had passed, in which Peter lived with the vampires and brought them some human things close. They accepted him further and let him in with them in their small group, even if Fury wasn't so convinced of the idea and Bucky tried to bite the boy again and again, but was always stopped by Tony. Peter always found these moments totally funny. But to be honest he also provoked Bucky a little bit, because that was how he got all of Tony's attention and that was exactly his goal. In the end, the man had to come up with something and decided to take the boy on a short walk to the cemetery, where the two went to a small chapel. The brown-haired teenager looked around in surprise. He had been a visitor to this place all these years and yet he didn't know about this abandoned chapel.

"Why are you bringing me here?" His brown eyes looked up at the man, who stood uncertainly in front of him and swallowed.

"I wanted to try something.. Can I?" Peter nodded gently, wanting to know what the vampire was up to. Tony carefully placed his pale hand on Peter's cheek and kissed him tenderly, then a little more demanding, while slowly pushing the boy back until his ass touched the altar. With his vampire speed, he grabbed the boy's butt cheeks with his hands, lifted him up and placed him on the altar, so that Peter quickly wrapped his legs around Tony's waist and pressed him close to himself. The kiss grew wilder and the breath louder, Peter liked his proximity, wanted more, much more. "Are you sure? Do you want that?"

"Shut up and do it." Peter clawed into the man's hair and pushed him towards his neck, because he was supposed to give him that feeling back. The next moment Tony bit him, the beard tickled Peter lightly, but instead of giggling, he groaned loudly and pressed his fingernails into his shoulder. The hand on his thigh slipped slightly to the inside of it and then slowly up. Peter's crotch tingled and his cock slowly tightened, causing his face to flush. He almost wanted to be ashamed of it, but then their bodies touched and he could feel the big bump in Mr. Stark's pants. The hand he had on his shoulder slid to the bulge and squeezed it, so that the vampire groaned loudly against his neck and then moved away.

"Have you ever had sex with a vampire?" Tony's hands pressed into Peter's thighs to hold back.

"I've never had sex." He put his arms around his neck and pulled him back down to kiss him, but he backed away for now.

"How old are you again, little rose?" Peter smiled slightly before opening Tony's belt with one hand and pulling the pants down a little. The older man helped him, unbuttoned the shirt, and slipped it over his shoulders until it fell to the floor. While his pants were being lowered, Peter pulled his sweater over his head and was released from his jeans with the help of the vampire. Peter's body trembled slightly from the sudden cold that enveloped him, and the cold hands on his skin didn't improve it entirely.

"Last chance.. Do you want that?"

"Yes I want it."

Tony nodded briefly before pulling down his boxers and freeing his dick. He held it at the root and looked directly into the boy's eyes, so that he had to swallow with huge eyes. Damn, it was big. Peter leaned forward and greedily licked the tip, causing the man to moan and make himself whimper. Tony pulled the smaller one straight back by the hair with a shaken head, before sliding him off the altar and pressing him with his upper body instead onto it. Peter felt his shorts pulled down and cold hands touched his round ass. He wiggled it briefly, giggling slightly, and then waited patiently for more. Tony's hand went slowly to Peter's hole, but before he inserted a finger, he spat on it. With the biological lubricant, the middle finger could easily be pressed into the boy and a second finger too. Peter groaned loudly and closed his eyes as he clawed his fingers into the altar.

"Yeah.. just like that.." Tony made scissors movements in him, kissing his back and complimenting him because he was so good for him. "Please.. I want you.. please do it.."

The vampire, of course, listened to the little one and removed his fingers before he placed his tip on Peter's hole and carefully and slowly slid into him until he was to the root in him. Peter cried out softly, throwing his head back and pushing himself against the man. That was the okay for Tony to start and he immediately thrusted into the boy and fucking him hard. The teenager was slapped against the altar, while he feeling like he was torned apart, but it just felt amazing. His abdomen tickled so much and his ass sent electric shocks all over his body, which almost got him over the edge. However, what completely wiped him out was when Tony pressed his fangs into his shoulder and gave him that feeling of immortality. He felt his blood start to boil and his head burned like fire. He screamed in pain and satisfaction, when he felt the last hard thrust against himself and finally had one of the best orgasms of his life. He let himself fall limply on the altar, felt how Tony's cock slowly lost hardness in him and how the burning in his body didn't stop.

"Fuck.. I'm so sorry! It just came over me, I wasn't thinking.. Please forgive me." Tony slid out of the boy, his cum ran out of his little hole and the sweat dripped down his forehead.

"What do you mean?.." Peter tiredly turned his head in the direction of the vampire, on which blood ran down the corners of his mouth. "Oh.. So that's the burning.. As a vampire I have at least more endurance, so thank you.."

"You were so innocent and I ruined you, I can't even forgive myself.."

Peter lifted his body up and turned to Tony, looking into his eyes with a smile. "You're the only one I let ruin me."

Tony felt incredibly guilty for what he had done, which is why he finally got the help from his 'family' to prepare Peter for everything important. Bucky had taken care of the boy, which was pretty surprising to everyone, but nobody minded. The soldier, as Peter learned, was completely alone when he changed and was a cold-blooded killer for years that almost revealed the secret of the vampires. Only then Steve found the newborn and take responsibility for him, show him the good side of being a vampire and learn how to keep himself under control. Apparently the two men had quickly fallen in love.

"My head's burning so'much.." Peter had his hands clenched in his hair and his legs pulled up to his body, while he whimpered softly, completely disconcerting Tony so that he paced the room and cursed loudly.

"I know, doll. It'll get better, promise, okay?" The long-haired vampire hugged the small human body tightly, gently rocking him back and forth to look at Tony in silence. He hated him for what he had done to the teenager, he hated him.

Peter gasped in surprise, clutched one hand in the shoulder of the man in whose lap he was sitting, and cried out softly. It was time, it happened. Tony dropped to his knees next to the boy and put the boy's head on his shoulder, causing Bucky to slowly let go and nodded briefly. He had already sensed that the man would take on the difficult task and simply let it happen. At least the kid wasn't alone.

"Shh.. It's okay, my little rose.. Everything will be fine, shh." Tears ran down Tony's cheeks, for the first time in years, which is why Natasha went to him and put her hand caringly on his shoulder.

"Tony.." Peter's honey brown eyes fought for victory against the new color red, which wanted to take over the eyes completely and after a few minutes of senseless struggle, the beautiful brown lost to the rose red. "No matter what happens, don't be angry with yourself, okay? Thank you for the good time here.. For the distraction of my uncle's death.. I love-" He lost consciousness, closed his eyes and slowly let the cold take over his body. His skin turned snow white, so white that even Buck was amazed. He had never seen such a white vampire, even as a newborn.

"I'm here Peter.. I won't go, do you hear? I won't go." Then everything went very quickly. The boy opened his blood red eyes and suddenly stood at the other end of the room, dropped to the floor and looked around in disbelief. He raised his hand and examined it closely, Bucky smiled broadly in the background, he knew exactly why he reacted like that. His eyes were much better now and he perceived everything around him very differently. "Little rose, look at me.."

Peter raised his head and looked directly at him with two fresh red eyes, a fang flashing through his slight smile. "Tony.. that's crazy! I love it !" It only took him one step to the man, he no longer noticed the others, he was that fast. "Look how fast I am!"

"Baby rose, come here." Tony got up from the floor and pulled the boy into his arms, kissing his head full of emotion.

Steve smiled and leaned against the wall behind him, raised his arm and gave Bucky a warm welcome as he huddled against his side and put his arm around him. Now everything's good. And Tony had finally found someone to spend the rest of his vampire life with.

[vavuska]

If you do quick search on Google Imagine for draw of chubby persons, you will see that most of the subjects are drawn with sad expressions, while their slim and athletic alter egos are happy and smiling.

Why they are sad? Because they are “overweight” and they have low self-esteem.

Mmmm. They have low self-esteem because society told them — and us — that if our bodies doesn't match with standards imposed by mainstream media, we have no value: we are not attractive, ambitious or, yes, smart. We have no talent and no one will love us. That's not true, obviously.

Being slim and athletic won't make necessarly us happy.

Some girls who have a natural thin body structure for genetic reasons, have find their selves slotted into a footnote: “Oh yeah, and if you’re naturally skinny—must be nice—you’ve got a fast metabolism and stuff so, ya know, just eat more.”

That “just eat more” advice would work fine for most people, but the fact that they aren’t most people is precisely why they’re being given that advice in the first place, and also why that advice is rather naive. For most people, eating lots of food means gaining weight. Maybe the person who heard that thing, is actually eating a lot and they probably even like it (but they don't got fat).

What most people don’t realize is that telling someone to eat more is as silly as us telling someone other, “Just eat less—duh.” That’s not going to solve any problems: it is just making them feel uncomfortable with their body.

Again, if you search for "skinny girls draw" on Google Imagine, you will find smiling persons, that show proudly an apple, compared with chubby sad persons with fuzzy drinks and hamburgers.

Ok. A complete meal against a fruit. Wow.

Both being underweight that being overweight could cause or be caused by depression.

Although depression amongst overweight people is more common in women than men, both genders are equally prone to feeling depressed when it comes to thin people.

The study was conducted by Seoul National University of Medicine, but experts have not concluded whether being skinny is a cause or symptom of depression.

They pointed out that depressed people may be more likely to lose - or gain - weight, or it could be that being thin - or overweight - makes people depressed.

However there are gender differences.

“It seems that the current ideal of thinness affects women more than their male counterparts and causes more psychological distress in women, which can, in turn, lead to depression,” the researchers said.

“In contrast, men who are overweight showed a significantly decreased risk of depression.”

Dr Agnes Ayton, vice-chairman of the eating disorders faculty at the Royal College of Psychiatrists, said: “This large study confirms that optimal nutrition is fundamentally important for physical and mental health. Both being underweight and obese is associated with an increased risk of depression.”

“It is an important finding, as people with eating disorders often assume that losing weight will improve their happiness. This study shows that the opposite is true and malnutrition has a detrimental effect on people's mood. Maintaining a healthy weight is essential for good mental health.”

Ok, so... An happy life and an happy mental health is very connected with a good self-esteem than the actual “healthy weight”. People with healthy weight can have a low self-esteem and depression too.

I admit that I lack a lot of confidence and do not feel good about myself most of the time.

And when low self-esteem becomes a long-term problem, it can have a harmful effect on our mental health and our day-to-day lives.

What is self-esteem?

Self-esteem is the opinion we have of ourselves.

When we have healthy self-esteem, we tend to feel positive about ourselves and about life in general. It makes us better able to deal with life's ups and downs.

When our self-esteem is low, we tend to see ourselves and our life in a more negative and critical light. We also feel less able to take on the challenges that life throws at us.

If you have low self-esteem or confidence, you may hide yourself away from social situations, stop trying new things, and avoid things you find challenging.

In the short term, avoiding challenging and difficult situations might make you feel safe.

In the longer term, this can backfire because it reinforces your underlying doubts and fears. It teaches you the unhelpful rule that the only way to cope is by avoiding things.

Living with low self-esteem can harm your mental health and lead to problems such as depression and anxiety.

You may also develop unhelpful habits, such as smoking and drinking too much, as a way of coping. Or searching for comfort in food.

People with a good self-esteem are able to feel good about themselves for who they are, appreciate their own worth, and take pride in their abilities and accomplishments. They also acknowledge that while they’re not perfect and have faults, those faults don’t play an overwhelming or irrationally large role in their lives or their own self-image (how you see yourself).

HERE SOME USEFUL TIPS TO RAISE YOUR SELF-ESTEEM:

Our self-image is deeply connect with our body image.

What is body image?

Body image is defined as an individual construct that is influenced by mixed feelings and ideas about one’s own appearance.

However, because there is a complex overlap between emotions and self-perception, body image is not always reflective of how an individual actually appears. Like self-esteem, body image can be distorted or inflated, relatively accurate or slightly ignored depending on the individual.

If you’re an individual who has struggled with poor body image and depression, it can be difficult to distinguish which came first.

Understanding where negative self-talk begins can be an overwhelming endeavor. Many people have become so accustomed to the emphasis our culture places on appearance that obsessing about it seems normal. In addition to this, there are unlimited ways an individual’s self-esteem and the way they perceive their body can be influenced.

Women are generally characterized by being concerned about attractiveness, and less satisfied with their appearance based on achieving unrealistic standards of thinness. While the foundations for acceptable appearance may be built in adolescence, as adults we often find attractiveness correlated with success, competency or happiness. This message, however it may be played out in media, can reinforce scrutiny about body image and dissatisfaction or unhappiness at not meeting the standard.

This by no means indicates that men are not vulnerable to the cycles of negative body image and depression. In fact, it’s estimated that roughly 45% of men are unhappy with their bodies (Better Health). The same factors and pressures exist for men, but the ways in which the disorders will express themselves can be different.

Men, for example, can be more likely to engage in over-exercising, generally being pushed toward the use and effectiveness of their body being likened to a machine.

There is a correlation between poor body image and eating behaviors. When people feel poorly about themselves and have a negative body image, they are more likely to be susceptible to disordered eating behavior (Cargill, 2012). The negative self-talk and appraisal of one’s body and appearance, coupled with depression, can lead to a negative cycle of living.

HERE YOU CAN FIND SOME USEFUL TIPS ABOUT RAISING YOUR SELF-IMAGE:

The article above give precious advice:

- Give yourself some daily task: I know that can be difficult, but it will give a purpose to your day and it will make you fell better, if you completed your "to do" list. Search for quotes that will inspire you to give your best. Set realistic expectations for yourself: Consciously think how reasonable and manageable your goals are before striving for them, remembering that life in general is imperfect. Recognise there is a huge difference between failing at something you do and being a failure as a person. Don’t confuse the two. Redefine failure, and keep trying. When you have low self-esteem, it’s common to think of yourself as a complete and utter failure. But failure is part of success. Failure doesn’t characterize you as a person or determine your self-worth.

- Develop your interests: When you’re depressed and your self-esteem feels like it’s sinking daily, it’s easy to overlook your passions. Take the time to “write a list of things you used to love to do and stopped doing along with things you always wanted to do but haven’t done yet.”

For exemple, if you loved to draw, then take your time, a paper and draw something inspire you.

- Do some exercise: that don't means that you must to start to have hard gym training, it have a cost, and you could be not ready for that (myself avoid gyms because I don't want to be judged for my body), but you can make some movement in other ways: instead of moving your care, you can walk to reach near destination or use a bike, if you have one. One of the best parts of my day is biking to university: when I'm nervous, it calms me.

That's why I decided to turn that negative narration in a positive one: I edited the pics to meke people happier and give them various interests!