#for like....... idk prob at least 3 months lmao

[todayisafridaynight]

THIS IS GONNA SOUND SO MEAN BUT WHY DO U LIKE RYO AOKI/MASATO

masato hot

[heffrondriving]

soooo. that new big time rush album huh

[sanchoyo]

the job has been going surprisingly ok! I got most of my hours for the week done in like 4 days and im kinda hoping next week i can cut that down to getting it done in like, 3 and then having 4 days off lol. but i do have a webinar thing to attend tomorrow and im dreading it dskkfhkj. i never do well at live meeting call thngies. I do ok at in person ones but for some reason web based ones wig me out x_x (its only like 45 mins and mic only so it could be worse??) auggh

[nickeverdeen]

Hehehe could I get an Arcane and/or Nimona matchup😋 I’mma yap a lot so prepare LMAOO

My name is Kathryn (or Kat for short) and I'm in school for graphic design and communications - I originally wanted to go into cosmetology to become a desairologist, but I didn't get in. I play piano, dance (hip hop, ballet, tap, and jazz), and sing. I also produce my own music.

Idk how to classify my style so I'lI say it alternates between morute, gloomy coquette, dollette, gothic, and alternative. I also lean heavily towards the feminine side of the spectrum.

I practice witchcraft and l'm also a Christian. I have a weird fascination with dolls and I collect them, specifically porcelain dolls. Like, it's so bad LMAO my friends are scared to come into my room atp!!! Literally I'm probs on someone's rob list I have one worth $400😭🙏

I also collect vinyls. I have over $600 worth of them save me…

Some of my favorite music artists are Bambi Baker, Melanie Martinez, Solya, Elita, Ha Vay, Baby Bugs, and Mercy Necromancy. I also like a lot of rock; AC/DC, Scene Queen, Delilah Bon, BANSHEE, Gurldoll, Ashnikko (she's sometimes rock), and Ennaria

I suppress literally everything until I just burst and it’s been building for two years now so uh yay😍

My humor’s honestly really weird. I can laugh at bread falling but find a really good dad joke stupid and unfunny. I also tend to match the personality of the person I'm speaking to. I’ve also been told I’m really great at comfort but I don’t know about that. A lot of people confide in me with their problems. Like a lot..🥲 not that I mind, it just gets a bit tiring

I’m more attracted to masc leaning people but I’ve also dated fems before. It doesn’t really matter to me as long as we have chemistry, but I do find myself eyeing a lot more masculine girls.. I’m kind of attracted to men, but not a whole lot.

I also don’t like touch unless I’ve known the person for at least 6 months or I initiate it. I’ve had multiple breakdowns because someone who wasn’t a “safe person” touched me without giving any warning…… I tense up MASSIVELY when someone hugs me even if I know they’re going to. The only people that don’t have that effect on me are my best friend (who I’ve known for 4 years) and my dad.

I took a state personality test and I’m exactly 50% INFP and 50% INFJ. Legit confused the test and it gave me both💀

Im diagnosed with anxiety & depression. I've been told I might have OCD, BPD and some sort of depersonalization/derealization disorder.

I believe I could have autism or ADHD. I also have heavy hallucinations that can last either 30 minutes or 2 weeks. I have major mood swings too. One minute I can literally be bouncing up and down while wanting to blow something up and then the next I’ll be crying on the floor😭

Aaanyway I think that’s enough of me yapping have a great day babes<3

Your Arcane match is…

Caitlyn Kiramman

Caitlyn would love discussing your music collection, especially rock and alternative genres

It may not seem like it, but she has a soft spot for underground bands and loves discovering new music

Caitlyn’s patient and empathetic nature makes her a great listener, offering comfort and understanding when you’re feeling overwhelmed or anxious

She’d be your rock during your mood swings

Provides a calming presence and helpes you through tough moments with patience and care

Caitlyn respects your need for personal space and takes care not to touch you without permission, understanding the importance of consent and comfort

Caitlyn would plan unique and adventurous dates, like exploring hidden spots in Piltover or attending underground music gigs

She herself would maybe prefer a classic restaurant one, but when she tried this she prefered this

Caitlyn would like your unique style and often compliment your outfits, even suggesting accessories or outfits that might suit your aesthetic

She’d be a bit unsure and creeped out by the doll thing, though

Caitlyn would silently encourage you to express your emotions and not suppress them

Caitlyn’s love for photography would complement your graphic design skills, and you’d often collaborate on creative projects

She would cherish quiet, quality time with you

Whether it’s listening to music together, having deep conversations, or simply enjoying each other’s company

Your Nimona match is…

Nimona

Nimona’s playful nature would match your quirky humor

She’d often make you laugh with her antics and shapeshifting abilities

Nimona would love going on spontaneous adventures with you, whether it’s exploring new places or trying out new activities

Nimona’s fierce loyalty means she’d be incredibly protective of you, always ready to stand up for you if anyone tried to harm or disrespect you

Nimona would appreciate your artistic talents and often encourage you to express yourself through your art and music

Her unconventional ways of comforting might seem odd, but they’d always make you feel better, like turning into a cute animal to cheer you up

Slowly she would learn to respect your boundaries over time, ensuring she doesn’t touch you without your consent

Nimona would love discovering new music with you and often play your favorite songs during your adventures together

Despite her tough exterior, Nimona has a deep understanding of emotions and would be there for you during your highs and lows

Nimona’s idea of a date would be anything but ordinary – from sneaking into restricted areas to watching thunderstorms from a safe spot

She’d like your unique style and individuality, often praising your confidence

[fortemelody]

miku expo was legit the best day of my life so i wanna ramble about it

edit: found this in my drafts and wanted to revive it even if this took place like a month ago now lmao

first off i wanna kinda stress something that i honestly might get flamed for

i was in the pit, literally the third row, and around the halfway mark people who didn’t have wristbands on (that you get if you’re in the pit) finagled their way in and no security stopped them. this was like 5 people near me and like 3 more on the opposite side of the chairs. i could barely move cus i was so squished in by them and beforehand i was taking the opportunity to jump and dance becus i was in the aisle becus it was very spacious.

i personally see this as wrong. like i understand the feeling so much of not having good seats becus they are expensive. my bsf’s parents payed for these seats and that was the closest i’ve ever been/probably will ever be at a concert. i am eternally greatful for them. however, if i were at any other concert with my regular nosebleed seats, i would not move up to somewhere where the seats were obviously filled and payed for. people work hard to have the kind of money to spend on good tickets, and i felt like they were stripping away all of that just becus there was some open space and no one from security happen to be watching

i do feel kinda bad becus my friend was complaining a little too loud and vulgarly without a proper confrontation and i was saying things like “yeah” and “real” and i think they eventually kinda heard us but they didn’t do anything in response until i finally asked them nicely to at least step back so i could move around. most of them listened then but one person didn’t.

i want to acknowledge that i probably wasn’t perfect either in a different aspect becus i was legit screaming my head off and i realize now that behavior can definitely be distracting. i forgot that convention idol etiquette very much applies to even a virtual concert because there are others around me that might not appreciate my loudness who aren’t performing, along with the band members (although they prob couldn’t hear me from backstage).

wanted to address my thoughts on the screen too. honestly i still think it’s a weird call (and would make a lot of sense if it was by crunchyroll) and i still think it’s rather cheap but i can at least acknowledge that the visuals were pretty crisp. im assuming it also helped people see it from super far away better. it was definitely not an experience ruiner by any means but it was pretty jarring for the first 10 mins or so.

anyways, on to the good moments. at the end i shouted thank you to the band members when they came out and one of them saw me gave me the heart hands AND IT WAS SO FUCKING SWEET AHHH

i went into this only knowing about 5 songs for the set list and i’m so glad for that becus the suprises kept hitting me. some of the most hyped songs for me were unknown mother goose and fraulen biblioteca. i was so happy they played a wowaka song becus he deserves to be honored in multiple countries. and with fraulen i have a video recording of it where me and my bsf’s convo went like this:

“i can’t believe they did it”

“what?”

“I CANT BELIEVE THEY DID IT”

“ME TOO”

(for context we were debating which songs would get played on the way there and we wanted this one but thought it had a slim chance. also meiko is my fav soooo)

ALSO we didn’t know we got VIP till someone told us (thank you kind stranger). the tote bag is really nice and i’ve gotten a ton of use out of it. and i used the fan in place of a penlight the whole time- idk how it didn’t break. as for the other stuff it was just kinda meh to me.

lastly we got a shit ton of confetti from the cannon and passed some out to people and took a couple for ourselves too. i’m so glad they did that it was a nice touch and it looked so beautiful as it was falling tbh

i think that’s all i gotta say but i might make some fanart to commemorate it later (i just said this same thing in a post a couple days ago and i haven’t even started *that* drawing yet….oopsies).

[cloudstrifing]

stuff to write masterpost

mostly for my own reference but it is always more fun and motivating to share so!!! perceive if u wish, if ANY of these get written it’s a win actually!!!

fics marked green are done fics marked orange are in progress fic marked blue are on hold for now!! anything else is not started yet!

ffvii:

secret fic for turks fan exchange:

Coloratura

aerti/zakkura/rdrn triptych of au oneshots, tied together by the fact that everyone goes to the same gym

rdrn fake dating for a mission bc i have ALL the confession dialogue ready to launch alrd and it’d be a waste not to deploy..... (i conceived her last winter and was hoping to time it with NYE whihc. that could still happen. lmfao. update: ITS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN BC TIME IS FAKE, update to the update: welp yet another winter is coming up so .)

jjk:

ch 3 (final) of wellness grifter geto stsg au (Let’s Purify ✩ Body & Mind!!) -- posted the second chapter after only (checks watch) a year and two weeks lmao. this one is getting slept on bc i have zero presence in the jjk fandom and my timing sucks. but ill prob finish it someday since *i* think the idea is good so WHATEVER!!

trigun:

drunk and unsexy boys-will-be-boys vw: good old-fashioned lover boy (it ended up maybe a bit more sexy than intended)

less drunk but VERY sexy plant heat vw: Gun Barrel Red Hot

modern au kniveswood ft terrible manipulative relationship dynamics to uncritically emulate in real life: pov: you're the most fuckable person at the grocery store currently in progress; also a bonus little epilogue-like pwp pretty fixation

post trimax livvash, aiming for short but eternally traumatizing: say your name, forever

dark biopunk au for kniveswood bang: oxytocin running

og (finally regaining some urge to work on these):

lesbians caught in a snowstorm but actually caught in the mindscape of the Creature but actually caught in their own inability to do feelings pls god i just need to finish Any version of this -- a finished version now exists! idk if it's my best work but it sure is done :'') if i can get someone to edit it i may start shopping it around after!

hivemind jellyfish slayer turned good dad angst bonanza ditto above -- this is currently undergoing edits after brilliant feedback from from AJ!! i finished a version i was p happy with but after i incorporate AJ's edits it will become so much better

The Necromancers Are All Dead but make it flash fiction in order 2 reclaim my ability to have fun with a concept without spending sixteen months with it first -- speedran a version of this in my little writing illegally at work notebook, i don't really know what this story wants to be yet but at least ive sat with it for a while

novel ideas wanna be attended to; am reattempting some expanded synopses bc given some distance, some of my ideas were perhaps more substantial than i gave them credit for wahoo

updating this periodically for the rush of ticking items off a list <3

[imanes]

hi imane! i hope ur doing well <3 i just wanted to ask: what do you do during times of uncertainty? im a uni student abt to go on placement and I've been applying for part-time jobs that's centred around my field but to no avail sadly :/ i wanted to save up at least so i wouldn't stress during placement and everything's so overwhelming.. there are other external factors that's making me feel this way too like a friendship break-up i had few months ago and its affected me quite badly but im starting to pick myself up again. anyways sorry for the rant and i hope ur day is lovely x

hey! just sat down after hours of procrastination to work on my dissertation and i wish i were done already akjdkfgj but it could be worse!! ok it's gonna be long and probs unhelpful but i know that you wanted to vent more than you thought i was holding some solution so I'll just ramble and hope something resonates with you lmao <3

for me uncertainty makes me feel like my life is in shambles, it's hard to cope with things going south and not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel but during my yearly flop era in march/april i had a talk with a friend who's much older, wiser, and more experimented, and basically it helped me put things into perspective and learn how to let go. there are only so many things that you can control so i split my different issues into different categories for a more systemic approach to my problems lol: things that i can actually somewhat control (my emotions, my reactions, my efforts, what i can do moving forward to alleviate some of my stress), things that are out of my control (how people misconstrue me, external stressors like shitty coworkers, refusals from jobs i was applying for) and things (and people) that i don't need in my life. learning to let go of things for me internationally infamous control freak was not easy but it was liberating, idk if you're religious so if you aren't the next part isn't going to be helpful lol but i don't think i should be chasing things because i am exactly where i am meant to be, and if i start clutching at the things that aren't meant to be in my life, it's just my ego getting in the way, and i prayed that Allah just lets me find the place that i would fit better in and that He'd take me away from it if i wasn't going to be doing or feeling good there. i guess the non-religious version would just be to trust the process and understand that things in life wax and wane, whether it be job opportunities or relationships. obviously there's like a plethora of other factors like what do i do if i can't pay the bills and stuff? that was how i was thinking just a couple of months ago when my dissertation was not writing itself and nobody was hiring me! but a few weeks have passed and looking back on it i was starting to chase things again and it made me feel like i was stuck in a rut when in fact it's normal for things to take some time to settle down and for opportunities to arrive.

so basically whether you stress about it or not, literally nothing is going to change except the way you frame it in your head. for me i just continued applying and gave interviews my all while also being detached enough to simply trust myself to find the space that i was meant to occupy eventually, and after many many many rejections i finally found something a week ago, but it took a couple of months of steady job application to get there. looking from the other side of the mirror it's easy to say things like "don't get discouraged!" but it is true that if you keep throwing shit at a wall something's going to eventually stick, hence the power of consistency and of never giving up.

i'm glad you're slowly building yourself back up after your friendship break-up, i know how much it can drag you down but again some people are meant to be with you for a season only and at the end of the day with the effect of time making things more bearable and by working on your self-esteem and knowing that you can do things that you set your mind to, whether it is finding a part-time job or picking yourself back up, in a few weeks you're gonna look back on where you were mentally at when you sent me this message and where you'll be then and you'll thing "well i guess things DO pass huh who would've thought!!" lol life is a cycle of stability and unsteadiness, doesn't matter how much you prepare something's always going to go sideways but another truth is that things fall back into place again and you have to have faith in that, in yourself, and maybe in something else like i am w/ my relation to religion if u need extra help. speaking of help if you have a support system, confide in them and let them carry some of that weight for you!! you'd do the same for them so don't feel like you're a burden for needing help when you are facing instability. wishing you the best of luck and i really hope you find a good part-time job before your placement babe

[roseworth]

What don’t people like about Tom Taylor’s Nightwing run? (Genuinely asking.) I haven’t read any other Nightwing runs in full but I have read some old one-shots like Old Friends, New Enemies (alright) and The New Order (absolute garbage), as well as the entirety of New Teen Titans and the 2003 Titans run. I’m not that emotionally invested in Taylor’s run. Every time I see Babs as Batgirl I get so angry my vision blurs but besides that I just kinda read it every month like “that was kinda fun” and then I forget about it. Do people dislike it because of how frivolous it is or is it too two-dimensional a representation of his character or…? I’m just confused because I love being a hater but I see him bullied a lot more than other authors who deserve it more (like Scott Lobdell, who we should guillotine) and idk why (besides the obvious ableism problem with Babs, but that’s a company wide issue). I hope this ask isn’t annoying or unintentionally rude or anything. I’m genuinely just curious. I mean, hey, if we’re all lining up to attack Tom Taylor with hammers, I’ll get in line but I gotta know why, y’know?

idk why everyone else doesnt like him so i cant speak for anyone but myself (i also havent read any other full nightwing runs so maybe my opinion doesnt count hfsadkjhfsaj)

but personally my biggest problem with it is babs being batgirl :/ even batgirls is making half an attempt to put her in the wheelchair sometimes, but this run feels like its going out of its way to make babs be batgirl

other than that there arent like. Major Problems its just bad lmao, the writing feels so forced all the time and its like hes structuring the whole story around moments that he wants (like dick hugging bruce and calling him dad) but then all the moments seem unearned because he barely built up to it and it feels out of place. also theres like,,, no actual plot. he keeps pretending that theres actually a story but then nothing happens every issue

not to mention the way he writes dick is so. ugh. its like dick cant do anything with help which is really annoying bc hes getting knocked on his ass by random villains every month and then its like "oh but he has so many friends and the titans are here to help him <3!!!!" and then that happens 50 times

anyways. i think that a big reason he gets a lot of hate now rather than someone like lobdell is because lobdell isnt currently writing anything (afaik? hes not writing anything that i care about at least fhdjsahfk) so even though i want him to die hes not in my line of vision and i have no object permanence. TAYLOR on the other hand is writing multiple books rn and i see people hail him as one of dc's best writers and its sooo frustrating so i hate him. he also annoys me so i think he should die

most of what annoys me personally is that he writes the most bland stories with no actual characterization but there are still people acting like hes gods gift to earth in the form of a comic writer ://// like hes not a good writer, hes writing moments that are intended to be screenshotted and posted on twitter instead of writing stories

im not trying to convince you to hate tt or anything ofc, theres nothing wrong with his nightwing run (other than the ableism which like you said is prob more of a dc editorial thing than him specifically) so if you enjoy it thats great, godspeed 🫡

[bisluthq]

sometimes i wonder if joe resents taylor, even if its subconciously. at the end of the day, she'll always be the Taylor Swift and be famous in her own right. but I feel like the public perception of him, at least as of now, is kinda destroyed. like i have not seen one positive thing said about that man in the past 6 months. I just wonder if this will effect his career, mental health, safety, etc. idk i love both of them and i know he prob doesn't gaf but i can't help feeling a little bad for him

Well yeah lol he fucked up his life for Taylor lmao like we discussed this. It was cute when they were together and like dumb in hindsight lol but he was a grown adult man making grown adult decisions and he had a team around him to advise him. I’m sure people told him “don’t fucking do this” but manz was thinking with his dick and his heart lol.

I don’t think he resents her per se but I think because it was such a dick/heart decision that’s part of why he ended up sucking at the end. You can work through a lot of stuff if your head’s in it and get the sex and emotion stuff back but if you objectively recognize something is a bad idea then it’s very hard to reconnect I think.

I do this thing when I fight with my SOs where I ask at the end of the fight “list 2/3/5 things you like about me, can’t be you’re hot, and I’ll go first” and my thing is when I stop wanting to list off nice things about the person or I just have nothing much to say then I know it’s time to go lmao but I’ve still wound up stuck in a thing lol even though I knew I had nothing positive to say there (I have more positives now that I don’t see her every day like dope ass person but for a while there I had nothing). I think towards the end neither Joe nor Taylor liked each other as people and therefore there were no logical reasons to stay but since there were no logical reasons to be together in the first place like yeah lmao it fucked his life up lol.

She warned him this would happen.

[blackstarchanx3new]

Star rants about BL manga for a REAAAAALY long time

Lmao so I go to this specific book store to by M rated manga and apparently the cashier recognizes me by my face lmao.

I made a joke about it like, a month or so ago that "Oh yeah I'm probs the weirdo who buys BL porno manga"

And now I'm unsure if that's even a joke anymore.

I like to buy BLs and gamble if their terrible. (Idk why it just became a habit. X'D)

There was one so bad it's an internal meme between me and my bro that "Well it wasn't as bad as Caste Heaven".

NOTHING. Is as bad as Caste Heaven my god. I literally threw them in the garbage. X'D I cope with how legit triggering it was with ~COMEDY~ don't read it unless you hate yourself. It is SO BAD. I'm not a pearl clutcher by any means but HOLY SHIT.

Bitch club was at least MILDLY funny at times (Also terrible. But I kinda wanna know where it goes...? Is that bad??? X'D I've like, played with the idea of getting more of it just to see wtf happens it's like a crack series, but it's REAL. And terrible.)

Titan's bride is at least interesting enough plot wise I have somehow found myself with 3 volumes despite it being a Porn without Plot, but somehow has enough plot that I care 99xs more than the sex scenes. (Haven't read the 3rd one yet lmao but I does is have to know how it ends.) Also the art is nice lol. Characters are dumb as bricks tho lmao.

Ten count is a THING. That exists. Dear god I don't even have comprehensive thoughts on it. I've read it multiple times and I still dunno if I hate it or love it. I THINK I like it??? But Dear god my thoughts are COMPLICATED. It's like "Well I like this...but WTF WAS THIS" type vibe???

Bad boys Happy home is pretty enjoyable. Also has many WTF moments tho. I haven't reread it in awhile tho.

Hitorojime boyfriend- Terrible. Hated it. Didn't finish it. Less bad than caste heaven but that isn't saying much. Still god awful. Unlikeable as fuck characters. Kinda glad I hated it though because there's a whole other series it's attached to (Which I didn't know when I picked it up) so I at least didn't waste my time. (Does it say anything I was disapointed I found the recipe for it AFTER it was too late to return the "piece of literature"?) Art was cute though. Just terrible story and characters.

"I Didn't mean to fall in love" - AWESOME. I PICKED A DIFFRENT ONE OVER THIS ONE AND I MADE A MISTAKE. THIS ONE IS GREAT LOVED IT!~ ART 10/10 STORY 10/10 CHARACTERS ARE PRETTY GREAT TOO WOOOOOOOOOO

Seven days monday-sunday - Liked it. Was cute. By the same person who did 10 count so art was an absolute banger. Story wasn't by them so it was NORMAL. X'D

I have more but I'll shut up.

[irregulardiaryposts]

20:40 07/03/2024

okay wow well its been well over two years since i updated this 'diary' blog lol

so weird seeing all those old posts about being a teenager with existential thoughts lol i dont really think like that anymore, at least not so much. i guess an update is in order then lmao okay so im in my 3rd year of uni now and im doing my year abroad! doing it in a small city in spain and i really quite like my job, ive only got 14hrs, i have a 3 day weekend, the city is small so i can walk everywhere and this job really gives me a sense of purpose that ive been missing in my life. makes me really realise that university is NOT for me lmfao i was so depressed during my second year i probs went to like 20% of my classes loool. im pretty sure i mightve almost failed aswell but since the professors were doing a marking boycott they released grades without marking the final exam and so since i was already doing well enough in all my classes i passed! quite lucky i think cos i wouldve been so entirely embarrassed and ashamed if i had to repeat a year cos of mental health. i think things are better here tho my issues havent disappeard completely like eg i have these evening classes 6-7.40pm tuesdays and thursdays and for the past like month i havent attended :/ at first it was cos i was sick (i think it was covid lol either from glasgow or on the plane back idk) and then i just didnt go back to class. i think my main excuse is that that is dinner time for me and i dont wanna move dinner time lol. but also i think the class itself is just not for me i dont feel like i learn a whoooole lot while im there and learning on apps is easier for me? but i always felt better for going to the classes cos i was like ha! im not depressed would a depressed person do this!? but of course depression doesnt work like that and i think i need medicated ! but that seems too scary to say. but at least i found someone to do a language exchange with! ive only had one hour with her in spanish, which was yesterday, but i already feel like ive improved lmaooo like i literally dreamt last night in a mix of spanish and english ahahahah cos when i think about it i literally have not ever regularly spoken spanish, ive only really spoken for activies in class or speaking exams so no wonder i have 0000 confidence in my speaking abilities but im hopeful that this will really improve my speaking :) about my job i guess- i work in a high school and i really enjoy interacting with the kids they really do make every day different and more interesting so i am grateful for them but sometimes damnnn sometimes i wanna jump out the window especially with this third year class they are the class KNOWN for being a bitof a pain lol and sometimes i have to lead the class by myself lmaooo mid u ik im 20 but i dont look it and they certainly dont treat me like an adult or a teacher and ngl they are a bit disrespectful at times but also what are u gonna do they are 14 and i have no proper teaching experience to help them by myself i can only hope that im actuallt helping them learn english lol. it is quite difficult tho with my scottish accent to try and sound as clear as possible because i pronounce almost 100% of the vowel sounds differently than rp english which is what i think they are used to so i have to realllyyyy annunciate all my words and man is it tiring lol.

what else. im going to madrid this weekend with bestie and im really looking forward to having a relaxing and fun time but i still havent packed my bags looooooool i alwyas do this tho and its fine not a big deal at all but i def need to do it tonight cos im leaving tomorrow immediately after work so ill have to have an actual breakfast and take snacks with me. im really enjoying my time in spain or at least im trying to but i feel like i have pushed myself enough out my comfort zone to be able to look back on this and say yeah i really took advantage of that. like i think i need to be more personable (is that a word yes it is i used it right) in teaching and be more interactive with them and stuff also i feel like i shoulve arranged a language exchange sooner cos i think this will really help, and i need to interact more with the other assistant but the thing is is im just not a sociable personnnnnnn aghgh. any way cutting this short cos i need to pack my bags for my trupppppp

[methodrones]

album review : their satanic majesties' second request

released: june 1996

genre: psychedelic rock

and here we are to one of bjm's most popular albums! i think it's pretty solid, though i can't think of every track off the top of my head or anything like that, so i'll have to see after going through it. of course, this is the album that holds anemone, so it makes sense that it would be so popular. but let's dive in!

all around you - intro

this is the same as the outro, but we have a fun little voiceover to the music... this is for sure anton talking out of his ass but i love it. i think this is definitely somewhat inspired by the intro of sing this all together ( the first track off the rolling stones' album, their satanic majesties request ) which is also cool. i mean obviously, the album is literally named after it. this is giving kind of culty vibes and i'm surprised i've never actually listened to this? i reaaaally like the voiceover it's giving me everything, his voice slowly becoming more and more manic. good shit! i really enjoyed this, especially the lyrics like "the love we share / it's a secret for everyone." very much enjoyed...

rating: 9/10

cold to the touch

it's been a loooong time since i listened to this song. this is giving 60s, it's really good lol. and the tambourine ofc <3 but the chorus is great, the 'wooo!' is fun. i love when they just yell random shit. solo slaps as always, there will never be a bjm solo i don't love i think ... also anton's kind of whispered voice is reminding me of matt hollywood, i wonder if he wrote this song. i wouldn't be surprised, it's got that very sultry vibe matt's songs usually bring. but, who knows! good song, i enjoyed it much more than the last times i've heard it.

rating: 9/10

donovan said

the beat on this one is really good, very eastern inspired for sure. which i guess makes sense that something like in india you would be on this album lmao, i forgot how much this album brings in that sound. "she took just a tiny sip / now she's starting to trip" I LIKE THESE LYRICS. and the way anton sings "i wonder what she sees in you" ughhhhh it's good ... i've always enjoyed this song, the way the lines are sang and how it all flows together, and the soloooooo?!?? i can't tell if it's a synth or like an actual violin or something ... either way i really like it. so i'd give this one a good rating! it's not my fav on this album, but i do listen to it every now and again.

rating: 8/10

in india you

speaking of in india you ... here we have it again! it's soooo much better suited to this album than methodrone idk what was going on with that decision but, yk. whatever. the song itself is pretty good, the name is self explanatory when listening to it lol. the little beat drop is good, i like the vocals ... this is probably the same shit i said on it earlier tho ( unless i just complained about it, which i might've done ). probs my least fav so far but it's not bad or anything like that.

rating: 7/10

no come down

MATT HOLLYWOOD! i listened to this song for the first time like two months ago and i really enjoyed it, but, again. matt. his voice does hit every time and the tambourine coming in ... phewwww. the riff is good and i like some of these lyrics. and the switch up then it going back to being slow?! i love it. his vocals on the "if there's a god in heaven" are good i fuckin love his voice UGH. it's not even like his voice is that amazing it just has this quality to it i really enjoy. also i like the line "i got the holy spirit breathing down my neck" his little religious lyrics are fun, the second switch up is really good. anyway kind of a long song, almost six minutes, it does feel a little long but overall it's a solid track!

rating: 8/10

(around you) everywhere

okay synth ?! very short kind of interlude, sounds very similar to all around you. it's giving their satanic majesties request lol. the horns are good, but yk, it's just ... instrumentals. not much to comment on here. also my spotify fucking crashed right after this song played that's weird. thanks ANTON.

raring: 5/10

jesus

I FUCKIN LOVE THIS SONG. for me this is absolutely a hit, i think every single part of it works so well and all of the different solos make me go crazy. the lyrics and the way they're sung are also??? SO GOOD???? "missed my connection to the second resurrection / on a close up inspection / i lost my direction" WHAT THE FUCKKKK the lyrics have no right being this amazing. i do think this song is a little long, at least for me personally, but truthfully every other part makes up for it so ... it gets an extra point from me. god the soloing is just so fucking good. "i turned to jesus when i lost all my friends / and the good times all ended, with my money i spent it" idk something about the way this shit is sung makes me go insane. then the "have mercy please jesus" being sung in the background of the outro solo.... fuuuuuuck.

rating: 10/10

before you

another kind of short interlude, longer than (around you) everywhere tho. again with the eastern kinda influence! honestly i don't have much to say on this, it's alright. it gets a shrug.

rating: 5/10

miss june '75

ohhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHH. matt. matt matt matt you never cease to amaze me with your songwriting. this is a matt hollywood song through and through and i fucking adore it. it's slow, sensual, has the matt-esque suggestiveness of it all ... yeah. i know these lyrics by heart not even gonna lie and this is a fun, but simple, love song to play on guitar. do you want to hear me talk about solos again? because the solos in this song are great. anyway we get to the kind of main course and i really love the line "the way she dances makes me lose my mind" ughhhhh.... idk. something about it! his voice is so good here. i will say i usually skip the rest after "the two brightest stars up in heaven" just bc it's literally matt singing about having sex but. yk. interesting listen! very long song, but if you just listen to the first five minutes you'll be good and get the gist.

anemone

the greatest hit on this album, the most popular bjm song ... anemone! i actually have no clue who sings this one, i heard it was anton's wife, katy, but idk what was going on in 1996 so i can't really say that with any sort of confidence. anyway this song is just great. do i even have to describe why??? the intro, the riff, the solos, the bass. the tambourine literally makes this song what it is. and the vocals are great, i really like her voice. i also like this song live, it's soooooo good, i think i may actually prefer anton's voice on this track but the studio version really is great. the outro with anton and her singing "now that you're not around," UGHHH so good. this was the first bjm song i ever heard and what i think should be most people's first foray into the band! it pretty much perfectly encapsulates their sound. so, obvs, this gets a perfect score.

rating: 10/10

baby (prepraise)

another random instrumental ... yeah. idk why this reminds me of something that would be in the shining LOL.

rating: 5/10

feelers

mooooore eastern type stuff. idk if that's a sitar or what but i like the sound! i am not actually sure i've ever heard this song, very simple lyrics tho. i honestly don't have much to say, it's my least favorite on this album up until this point. another shrug.

rating: 6/10

bad baby

interesting little intro. interesting song in general ... i do like it tho, it's kind of soft and has a nice beat. the vocals are also good! this is pretty long, like eight minutes long, which i don't love but. whatcha gonna do. also has a percussion ass outro which is pretty cool. but this gets the same amount of love from me as feelers did.

rating: 6/10

cause, i lover

I DIDN'T EVEN RECOGNIZE THIS AT FIRST it's from thank god for mental illness ... or i guess technically it's from this album but it appears again a little differently on the next album. i really like this song!!! it's short and sweet but very country ish. good stuff.

rating: 9/10

(baby) love of my life

short ass instrumental again. literally i have nothing to say here! not too huge a fan of these types of tracks tho.

rating: 5/10

slowdown (fuck tomorrow)

weird track .... it feels very beatles. it's alright, not loooving it or anything like that but it does align pretty well with the 60s feeling a lot of this stuff is going for. not much more to say!

rating: 6/10

here it comes

i really like this song!! it's not too long, and the music is great and so are the vocals. very calm and vibey ... the lyrics are also cool, it's just overall a good song, not my favorite on the album but definitely a nice one to listen to. that solo too ... UGH!

rating: 9/10

all around you - outro

this is the all around you i usually listen to! but i may have to start taking a listen to the intro one too lol. it's pretty much the same exact song minus the voiceovers, with some other changes. i think they probably could've left one of these off the album, it doesn't seem all that needed to put the same song on here twice, but hey ... i like this one, surprisingly i like the intro one better tho!

rating: 8/10

to crazy to care - bonus track

this song is ALSO on thank god for mental illness, it's a good one and i love it!! i don't think it's necessarily fit to be on this album, but it's a bonus track and apparently with bonus tracks bjm doesn't give a shit. clearly. look at spacegirl... ANYWAY good, short song!! i'll go into it more on the next review.

rating: 9/10

there we have the album! this album was a little longer than the previous one, but not by much. i don't think i've ever listened to it all the way through like this, so it definitely put the whole thing into perspective for me. there's a lot of psychedelic rock vibes and eastern influence in here, it's a great album, mostly the misses lie with the interludes though. i don't think they were all that needed, or they could've been a little more interesting. the first half was also better than the second half in my opinion. but either way, this was very good! i actually have a greater love for this album now having heard all the genres and themes tie in together.

hits: anemone, jesus, miss june '75

misses: feelers, bad baby, all of the interludes

overall album score: 8.5/10

there we have it! next up is thank god for mental illness, which i've been looking forward to this whole time. expect it soon!!

[caelumsnuff]

ah you changed your user and i could not find you! how could you lol! glad you're still here <3 i'm gonna add to the filler spree convo we're mostly in rn and idk idk i don't know if it's mostly fandom. i feel like it's money?? why would a dude who makes six figures on patreon alone care about youtube's adsense?? idk idk greed?? but since it takes more effort to routinely make a cohesive and engaging plot and the views for lore drop videos (which i wish erik would stop those even tho i like lore and incorporate the info into videos with relevant plot lines like how in books and movies they don't recommend those writers info dump) and plot-heavy works that aren't inversion don't get views.

the only 100k view videos the past 3/4 months are sleep audios cause of those casual listeners (and not even the gavin one which at least had some v v v slight character development in it). if all you had to do was stick a mic near your chest for your heartbeat and breathe to get 140k+ views lmao and your (albeit poorly done) final episode of a villain's plot doesn't crack 50k then you'll prob heed to those casual listeners. he used to make celebratory discord posts when characters got their first 100k views on a video, he made a big deal when that now-moved lasko in the movie theater audio reached a million views, and he had a patreon livestream around when he made the mario tournament audio where he lightly mentioned it being a bummer when videos didn't do well (he made light of it but still).

he mentioned in an old q&a about doing this to tell stories the way he wanted, but i feel like the views and money are what's steering him away from it??

HELLO!!! Yes im still here! Not leaving now and dont plan on it anytime soon lol. Im happy you found me again 😊

I feel like money is literally the only other option aside from the possibility that hes simply lost interest in the stories he was telling. Maybe he still cares about telling good stories deep down, but i think even if thats true the views and money is winning out. Which is just sad, this started out as a hobby and it should stay as such. Especially with him having so many patrons on top of his IRL job. Patrons don’t just…. Leave easily. He might lose casual viewership, but patrons and dedicated fans would stick around if he started valuing quality>quantity again. Do you know how happy i would be if he started uploading less often in favor of releasing better written, plot-centric videos??? You would Not believe it. And youtubers who do that literally garner a dedicated fanbase, there are artists out there who have a trove of patrons supporting them through several months without releasing art because they love it and its of high quality. Erik is more than capable of doing that.

I really do just think the man has so much potential, and i feel its not being executed to its peak right now. If he sat down and gave himself even like…. Idk one upload a week or one every two weeks, he could be writing better thought out videos.

Anyways, i definitely agree with you that its the money and views steering him away. Which is a damn shame, bc once again… 6 figures on patreon + a day job. He does not need to kneel for The Algorithm™️.

Views/hits/likes dont determine the value or quality of your art. Ignore the views, write a good story because its something you wish to make FUCK what other people think! Create from your heart knowing its the best you could put out in that moment, not just something you think will garner views. You know how amazing some videos with 1k views are on youtube??? Fics with 100 hits??? Art with 6 likes???? Just Create with all you are, others will find your passion and feel blessed to have been able to do so.

[baekhvuns]

The kid is like 7(?) not sure 😭 idk if he's lucky or extremely unlucky to have a kpoppie mother

That final was nerve-wrecking, I wanted France to do something cause??? Yeah, Mbappe did his best tbh, they would be totally humiliated without him. But this man needs to be humbled down, cause wtf did he say about LATAM and football, huh. He reminds me of young Neymar, I rooted for him initially, but the amount of unprovoked cocky shit he says 🔪 hopefully Mbappe isn't a right-winger as well ☠ (I'm sorry I'm a Neymar anti, babes no love for him and his annoying haircuts in this household)

Please Baek bring an Ateez flag or a Hwa picket to the match so I can recognise you on TV! Ofc USA is getting everything, also why are they even hosting they suck at football. Guess they bought it just like Qatar lmao

Right, I guess that's why the novel is like 800+ chapters long already??? Granted the chapters aren't incredibly long, but still... idk if the sex scenes and kids will ever make it to the webtoon. Latil, girl I know you don't really care for the Harem, but those men are drying out... anyways Baeksy stand back, Tasir is my raccoon drug dealer! I'm currently obsessed with My Derelict Favorite, cause the main guy is so fucking beautiful I- SJDGUSUDHSDHGASGSHBSS it's Seonghwa with long hair 🥰🤪😳

Why are you being Baeksussy again, WHAT CARDS are you about to lay out?! Anyway on the nerd Hwa agenda, the photos with Lego he got, our Lego ambassador and THESE SELFIES gamer Ddeonghwa!!! Wotakoi AU WOTAKOI AU, thanxx for coming to my ted talk

So ummm even more high notes and hardcore choreography? 😭🤨 not sure how to feel about it, but we will see. At least it's not a proper comeback jahushdhshahajhssh. But the title, Halazia??? I'm sorry, but I have to laugh 😭 and what's with the remixes... The ending of Guerrilla sounds cool, but I'm not sure what kind of song it will be. Where did the bandages go, Hwa?! And is he wearing a skiiiiiirt aaaaaa. Yeosang, cover yourself, bby

Was about to send the demonic tongue Seonghwa, what am I seeing 😵 but the video of him smiling, I evaporated 😩

I don't wanna real date why would I fake date, unless it's my dream and I'm fake dating Park Seonghwa

NONONONO THIS CAN'T BE REAL??? 😭😭😭😭

These fucking edits are killing me, why am I having a laughing fit in the middle of the night

C-c-calm down....? one of my friends said, what if housekeeper/handyman Hwa AU. Seonghwa: *does anything*; we insane Shitstars: OMG NEW AU?!?!? - DV 💖

hi hello!!

he kid is like 7(?) not sure 😭 idk if he's lucky or extremely unlucky to have a kpoppie mother

LMFAOOOO no i guess he’s probably in his embarrassing phase where it’s him who’s embarrassing or he thinks his mom is, probs his mom <3 have u ever met him? maybe u guys share the same bias! BDMWHSK ASK HIM

That final was nerve-wrecking, I wanted France to do something cause??? Yeah, Mbappe did his best tbh, they would be totally humiliated without him. But this man needs to be humbled down, cause wtf did he say about LATAM and football, huh. He reminds me of young Neymar, I rooted for him initially, but the amount of unprovoked cocky shit he says 🔪 hopefully Mbappe isn't a right-winger as well ☠ (I'm sorry I'm a Neymar anti, babes no love for him and his annoying haircuts in this household)

no literally i was waiting for a counter attack in the first half?? but they didn’t do nothing?? and the way argentina’s goalkeeper is mad good at intimidating and his mind games?? bro got his hands on two mbappe pen’s, in 18 months made them wc winners?? crazy…123rd min save was woah,, im a fan, richarlison who??? but the number 10 argentinian has a HEAVY weight in football now, do not think any one will fill it in years to come 

les blues must’ve been a massive fight for them to act this cold on pitch 😭😭 yeah! but this dhdhdh NAHHHH BC THE AWARD CEREMONY PART 😭😭 MAN COME ON U NEED HUMBLING ;?1’£~€]£€| i get u didn’t win but at least respect others around, u won last time so it’s fine 😭😭🤚🏼 it was quite embarrassing to watch dhdhdh no bc neymar eventually grew up, mbappe just has this massive amount of power that keeps getting to his head and he can say good bye to the ballon d’or if he keeps being like that,, that psg match where bro wanted that penalty but didn’t get it I DONT UNDERSTAND IF ANY CLUB IN THE WORLD HAS NEYMAR, NO ONE ELSE BUT HIM TAKES THE PENALTIES ??? OKOK DESPITE THE DISLIKE I HAVE OF HIS POLITICAL OPINIONS I CANNOT DENY HIS SKILLS 🤚🏼 he’s an exceptional yet underrated player that gets fouled against, like bro literally getting choked on the field and get’s injuries insanely and then HE get’s the shit no but some of that diving fbwndbwk hilarious to watch dbdbd + BUT HIS POLITICAL OPINIONS 🔫🔫 

pls also see this entire post bc IM CRYINF IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT EVFKE

Please Baek bring an Ateez flag or a Hwa picket to the match so I can recognise you on TV! Ofc USA is getting everything, also why are they even hosting they suck at football. Guess they bought it just like Qatar lmao

U BET HRKWHDKWJCCK I SIGNED UP FOR IT 😭😭 hopefully the teams i wanna see actually get that location or id collapse but will go the finals dbdb,, trying to meet mbappe to humble him mayhaps <33 bestie would i rly bring a hwa pc to a match, yes i would. nah bc u.s would be a bad idea tbh 😭😭 if british + americans get together u know someone will get arrested plus they’d give alcohol too it’ll be a mess to see, pre sure the final is in california too

Right, I guess that's why the novel is like 800+ chapters long already??? Granted the chapters aren't incredibly long, but still... idk if the sex scenes and kids will ever make it to the webtoon. Latil, girl I know you don't really care for the Harem, but those men are drying out... anyways Baeksy stand back, Tasir is my raccoon drug dealer! I'm currently obsessed with My Derelict Favorite, cause the main guy is so fucking beautiful I-SJDGUSUDHSDHGASGSHBSS it's Seonghwa with long hair 🥰🤪😳

YEAH??? personally don’t think it should’ve dragged on for that long bc damn??? the time to read it?? do not have <//3 it was good at the beginning but latil is just dry atp,, HEKQDHWK MEN ARE DRYING OUT FOR HER LITERALLY DBDBDB

now hold on.

Why are you being Baeksussy again, WHAT CARDS are you about to lay out?! Anyway on the nerd Hwa agenda, the photos with Lego he got, our Lego ambassador and THESE SELFIES gamer Ddeonghwa!!! Wotakoi AU WOTAKOI AU, thanxx for coming to my ted talk

☺️☺️ HELLO <33 BDBDBDNS WANTED A DIOR AMBASSADORSHIP BUT NOW A LEGO ONE SOUNDS PRETTY GOOD 😭😭😭 lego korea need to make a ateez x lego collab where the figurines are all of them, will 100% get the hwa one. GAMER HWA UR ONTO SOMETHING ANON

So ummm even more high notes and hardcore choreography? 😭🤨 not sure how to feel about it, but we will see. At least it's not a proper comeback jahushdhshahajhssh. But the title, Halazia??? I'm sorry, but I have to laugh 😭 and what's with the remixes... The ending of Guerrilla sounds cool, but I'm not sure what kind of song it will be. Where did the bandages go, Hwa?! And is he wearing a skiiiiiirt aaaaaa. Yeosang, cover yourself, bby

here we go again fhwjdhsjjck when the track list teaser dropped i thought it was an edit tbh 😭😭😭 halazia it is 😭😭 i wonder how they’ll incorporate in the lyrivs fbsndbsn and remixes! yay! yg! WHERE THE BANDAGES GO?? TO CHOI SAN BC WHAAT 👁👁 uh! new show!

Was about to send the demonic tongue Seonghwa, what am I seeing 😵 but the video of him smiling, I evaporated 😩

no bc what are we seeing on the tl these days,,, selfies galore vs demons galore aM I COMPLAINING? NO DBSNBDS

omf since we were talking about krystal, she is in fact, the OG IT GIRL, the aura, she defines the word aura, cold and warm at the same time 🫡 what an idol 🫡 need her back

I don't wanna real date why would I fake date, unless it's my dream and I'm fake dating Park Seonghwa

SEE NOW REALISTICALLY SPEAKING lowering expectations bc no one like seonghwa 😔 manifesting an etl for u not for me bc i think id get so annoyed it would turn into enemies to fight real fast

NONONONO THIS CAN'T BE REAL??? 😭😭😭😭 /// These fucking edits are killing me, why am I having a laughing fit in the middle of the night

IM????? WOOYOUNG??? YEOSANG???? SEONGHWA??? HONGJGONGBGBF IT LITERALLY IS DISCURSTING 😭😭WHAT IS GOING ON IN ATINYVILE WHAT ARE THESE EDITS FBWNDBWM

C-c-calm down....? one of my friends said, what if housekeeper/handyman Hwa AU. Seonghwa: *does anything*; we insane Shitstars: OMG NEW AU?!?!? - DV 💖

o-okay bob the builder? SEONGHWA BOB THE BUILDER AU FBWMFBWMDJWK NO UR RIGHT UR RIGHT 😭😭😭

🧍🏻‍♀️ anon

why is this man so dramatic 😭😭acting like he touched a stove or something,, im on seulgi’s side, supporting women’s rights and wrongs

had a little moment over him actually

ANON?? THE BOYCOTT ACTUALLY WORKING??

[kimmkitsuragi]

i genuinely wanna know what tf was i on during the last semester like????

[mitchelljoni]

1 2 and 16 for bwmh >:)

classic

1. Favorite scene or line from (fic name)?

hmmm great qn!!! i'll be honest lol there's a few zingers that im kind of proud of lol mostly cause i read them and im like wow..am i...funny? and then i promptly remember that I Am Not and it was a moment of insanity <3 but still! probs the one that im proudest of is the whole end scene of chapter 9, the scene where emily and sue are in the kitchen!!

i am particularly proud of this line mostly bc i felt it was like. the thesis statement of the wholeeee thing (lol i say this ab everything as u know but i do actually mean it for this), like this idea that actually there can be love that feels good and love that feels bad and this was mostly the journey to the former, love that you just love having is. imo a true gift and one that we take for granted and i think sue's problem is she just doesn't see herself as someone for whom that is a thing. so that was a main driving force in bwmh and honestly i wrote this line and the following description ab austin and emily and lavinia months before i wrote the rest of the chapter or even the two chapters before it (which u also know cause i sent it to u)! but it felt right to do because then i had a kind of. idk a climax point. i see this really as the climax of the whole thing, even though sue's own love "confession" (inverted commas bc confession implies no one knows lol) is v cathartic i think this for me was like. the high point :)

2. Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of (fic name)?

pahahaha actually no not really!! i think in the interest of brevity/keeping it interesting i ended up spending way less time on the actual play element than i envisaged, but i didn't really have any ideas for that per se, and i'm kind of satisfied w the balance of it as it is...? i think there was like. probably more snogging and sex in a lot of earlier versions of scenes LMAO and then i was like hmm..no! like at the beginning of chapter 7 (which chronologically is after they sleep together in the present/chapter-wiseis after the interval) when sue wakes up/goes into the ktichen they were originally gonna at least snog again fdlgjflkgj but then i was like.....errr no. so. lol. also! the scene after dinner in that chapter emily was gonna be like generally...less angry and more horny flkgjdflgj but then i was like no bestie needs to say her truth lmao

16. Favorite thing about (fic name)?

KLJDSGLKFJGLKJF i love that this is part of your agenda to get me to Like My Work more like.....stop trying to make fetch happen,....

anyway i guess i probably like that i pushed myself to experiment w form and chronology. ive never done that before with a fic and it was fun! otherwise, i kind of like how referential i made it, usually when i do that stuff it's mostly just for my own satisfaction lol but it was so nice to see other people interested in my own little freaky nerd shit lmao

ask me fic questions!