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ipso-faculty · 4 months ago

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Proposing new meanings for the Disability Pride Flag stripes

I love the design of the disability pride flag made by @capricorn-0mnikorn (in consultation with many disabled people!). It’s beautiful, elegant, and distinct. I love the symbolism of the diagonal stripes.

But the more I think about the meanings of the five diagonal stripes, the more uncomfortable I am with them. So I'll explain my discomfort and then give proposed alternative meanings.

For those unfamiliar, these are the meanings that capricorn-0mnikorn gives:

The White Stripe: Invisible and Undiagnosed Disabilities

The Red Stripe: Physical Disabilities

The Gold Stripe: Neurodivergence

The Blue Stripe: Psychiatric Disabilities

The Green Stripe: Sensory Disabilities

With additional and helpful context here! 💙 Like a lot of disabled people my disabilities don't all fit neatly into these boxes, but I recognize some disabled people see themselves in these categories. I do appreciate the symbolism of it being the most common flag colours / internationalism plus the intent of representing diversity amongst the disability community.

Here’s what doesn’t sit well with me:

The yellow was chosen for the neurodiversity stripe because gold = Au = autism (and also as a fuck you to autism speaks, a sentiment I agree with 💯).

So autism is used to represent all of neurodiversity. Even though the 2018 AutisticsUK campaign to associate gold with autism was explicitly motivated by the idea that neurodiversity is larger than just autism and autistic people should have our own colour/symbol distinct from the rainbow infinity used for general neurodiversity.

One specific disability is effectively being given a whole stripe (autism) while the other four stripes are based on abstract ideas: red is associated with body -> physical disability, blue is associated with the mind (and is “opposite” to red) so -> mental disability. This is reasonable but it’s inconsistent. (And I am very much the kind of autistic who gets bothered by internal inconsistency 😅)

The Deaf community has been using cyan blue for ages (since at least 1999, probably older) and they have been so vital in disability rights history. I feel if any single disability deserves to get an entire stripe to themselves it should be them.

I appreciate the honestly that assigning green to sensory disabilities was because “that was the color that was left over” but it still feels wrong given how vital blind & deaf people have been to disability history.

Blue for mental/emotional disabilities also misses that the Mad Pride movement has been using purple as their colour since at least 2013.

If all five stripes were disconnected from actual disability-specific pride flags I think I’d be okay with it. What sets me off is the inconsistency: autism gets the privilege of its own chosen colour but not other disabilities? (Also: autism isn’t the only disability that uses yellow!)

My proposal for new meanings

I propose each stripe represent a different cause of disability, and the associated model(s) of disability that go with that cause:

Red: disability due to injury / the debility model of disability - e.g. injury due to armed conflicts caused by colonialism, injury due to gun violence in a country which fails to regulate gun safety, preventable illness due to sociopolitical neglect 😡🩸

Yellow: disability due to natural differences / affirmative models of disability - e.g. autistic people who lead lives that take advantage of their autistic traits, DSPS folks who are able to work night shifts and take pride in doing so 😄🌟

Blue: situational disabilities / critical models like the social model, social construction model, political/relational model, and radical model - e.g. a Deaf person who feels their only disability is that people don’t speak their signed language and don’t provide captions/etc 🗣️♿️

Green: disability due to illness / biomedical models of disability - e.g. people with conditions like ME/CFS and Long Covid who actually do want to be treated/cured 🤢🦠

White: disability caused by unknown or other factors / other models such as the human rights model - e.g. somebody with a poorly-understood and/or undiagnosed illness who is fighting for access for accommodations and medical care 👀🤍

People may relate to multiple stripes! Whether it’s for the same disability or for having multiple disabilities. Like the old meanings, the intent is to showcase our internal diversity. 🌈

It’s been my experience of disability community that attitudes about disability tend (in general) to be linked more to when/how we were disabled rather than mental/physical/sensory/etc. For example, people like me who were disabled from a young age tend to understand our disabilities differently than people who acquire disability later in life.

Colour choice justifications:

Red as disabilities caused by injury: keeping with capricorn-0mnikorn’s association of red with the body plus the common associations of red with blood, violence, and anger. I want to explicitly include the debility model of disability because a lot of white disabled people tend to forget or gloss over how disability is used as a weapon against racialized & Global South folks.

Yellow is associated with optimism and pleasure as well as enlightenment (such as in the Deaf flag) and so I connect it to the affirmation model of disability (which is the opposite of the charity/tragedy model). From there I associated it to disability due to natural differences, such as congenital neurodivergence. I want yellow to still be something that fellow autistics could still see themselves in the flag for! 💛 And I want intersex people who see their intersex variation as a disability to be able to see themselves here too because being intersex is natural 💛

Blue as disabilities that are social/situational in nature, like Deafness being a disability in situations where signed languages are unavailable. I wanted Deafness to actually be under blue this time. 💙

Blue has also been used for disability writ large for a long time now and so this one being the one associated with the Social Model feels most historically connected to me. I’m also including newer critical/postmodern models like the social construction model and radical model which also posit that disability is a social category rather than a deficiency of individuals’ bodyminds.

The social model is generally contrasted with the medical model - viewing disability as a medical problem. A lot of disability activism is focused on de-medicalizing our bodyminds and challenging the idea that we want to be cured.

But there are chronic illnesses like ME/CFS, long covid, and cancer where the people who are disabled by them do actively (and vocally) want to be cured! And they belong to the disability community too. Green was picked for illness because green has been used to symbolize sickness (e.g. the 🤮 emoji). And biomedical models like the traditional medical model and the more recent biopsychosocal model are thematically connected to disability being due to illness.

For white, I want people who are undiagnosed and/or who feel the invisibility of their disability as important to again be able to see themselves in this stripe. 🩶White is also the catch-all “other models” because of white being the sum of all colours in an additive colour model. Models like the human rights model I see as being appealing to disabled people who are feeling invisibilized by society.

For each stripe I've included both a cause of disability and a model of disability. The causes are concrete, and easy to understand. The models of disability are more abstract and not everybody will know them (especially ableds). But a flag gives us an opportunity to teach others about us and I think it's a great opportunity to increase awareness of the different views/models of disability. 🖤

Overall, I tried to keep as much of capricorn-0mnikorn’s reasoning/associations alive in my new proposed meanings as I could. 💜 I hope people who see themselves in a given stripe of the original flag will see themselves in this scheme as well. I hope people who didn’t see themselves in the original scheme find these options more inclusive. ☮️

#disability pride #disability #disability pride flag #flag meanings #colour meaning #disabled pride #pride month

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jikooklove9795 · 4 days ago

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Was going through ur last post it was amazing. I am curious though! What was *that* moment of realization to u?

To be honest I am in this jikook shit for years now and feel very refreshed and happy when I see more and more people share and celebrate their relationship

Lots of love❤️❤️

Hi Sweetheart! Thanks so much for your kind words.

The first ever video I watched of BTS was their Dynamite MV. In 2020. I loved it! Everything. The beats, the choreography, their outfits, their voices, their sync. Everything! I started watching everything related to Dynamite. And that's how I stumbled upon the behinds of their MV. I loved how loud and fun the members were. How enthusiastic they seemed about their job.

By this time I was able to tell which members were which. It took me almost a week 😅 It was my first time watching anything Korean. So, I kept getting confused about who was who. However, Namjoon was easy to spot. Maybe it was his blue hair at that time. But by the end of a week I could comfortably identify all of them and got their names correct too.

While I was watching a behinds video of Dynamite I chanced upon this video here. And what struck me was the way Jungkook kept staring at Jimin. He was so into the staring that I doubt he heard anything what was being said until Taehyung had to tap him to get his attention. Not only that but I also noticed that Jimin felt Jungkook's stares on him and was trying not to look at him directly but still looked like he enjoyed the attention.

I got intrigued by what I saw and tried to dig into it to see if it was just a one time thing or if there was more to it. I watched a few Jikook videos on YT. And sure there seemed to be something but I realized all the members are touchy feely and super close with each other. But still the way Jungkook kept looking at Jimin in the above video was something else. It cannot be explained away with normal skin ship, affection or friendship. So, I decided to watch original content cause then I can get the proper context instead of compilation videos.

I saw all the big, loud Jikook moments: RB, GCFT, GCFS, MMA 2018. But what made me realize that Jikook are different, that they're a couple was when I started watching og content in chronological order. Starting from the pre debut days. I could see their story slowly unfolding.

Them being best friends and being find of each other. Jungkook going up to seek Jimin's advice regarding him wanting to pursue a career in dance. We need to remember that Jimin was the last member to get in the team and Jikook knew each other for just 6 months at this time. But Jungkook still felt comfortable going upto Jimin for that talk and nobody else.

Both of them having a soft spot for each other. Jimin being loud and open about his fondness for Jungkook. But for me the more telling was Jungkook's behavior. Jungkook's constant teasing of Jimin (this is something I have seen a lot of teens do when they have a crush, want to get the other's attention but still not ready to admit that there is a romantic interest). Seeking him out, wanting to be next to him, wanting his affection and attention. All of it.

I could see the realization of feelings, the acting on it. By this time in almost every video, let it be backstage or even award shows Jikook were glued at the hip. They were constantly together all the time by their voluntary choice. Jungkook started openly enjoying Jimin's affection, he became more daring and outgoing in seeking out Jimin. He started enjoying his effect on Jimin. And was always coming up with ways to get more of that reaction out of Jimin.

There were grand gestures, most of it from Jungkook. Sometimes it's impulsive but most of the times its because he wants to show Jimin openly how much he's in love and cares for Jimin. He wanted everyone including us, fans to know that he sees and treats Jimin differently.

There's the living together theories (if I'm being honest its not a theory to me cause there's so much evidence pointing to it). Since we are talking about living together how can we not talk about sharing rooms in hotels. They're the only ones doing it. None of the other members are sharing rooms unless its decided by games that they have to share. The others are more than happy to have their own space.

By 2020 they gave an established, secure in their relationship vibes.

So, yeah for me it was all the og content when watched in that order which cemented my belief that they're a couple. A long term one at that. Who cherish what they found unexpectedly when they came to Seoul for their careers.

Once again thank you so much for sending this in 😊

Lots of love to you too ❤

#jikook #kookmin #jungkook #jimin #ask

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pubbamoon · 4 months ago

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Random Astrology Observation 3

Hi and welcome to my another random astrology observation. I like this series, 'cause I have a free will to choose any placement to discuss about and I hope you do like it too. This observation might be related to both Western and Vedic astrology. Take it as it resonates and leave what does not resonate with you. Cool, we can start now!

Whoever natives have aspect between Mercury and Neptune, I feel sorry for these people, especially if they still go to school. Mercury is about learning, while Neptune is about illusions, so these people may not see things clearly or they can't communicate effectively. They can have a hard time processing informations and they may interpret things way more different than other students/people. Because of that, they might seem stupid or blunt to others, which may not be the case. Believe me, I have Mercury conjunct Neptune in my natal chart and although I can be creative and intuitive with this placement, I also have a hard time with having a conversations with the people who are close to me, because I interpret informations differently, which makes it seem that I don't listen to them at all.

Transit Pluto has been placed in Aquarius since January this year and we already see its influence in this sign. Some people from the upper class and even celebrities are exposed for their shady things they have done in the past, since Pluto represents exposing the truth, while Aquarius is about collectives, revolutions, changes for a higher good etc. In Vedic astrology, this pattern can be seen by the transit Saturn in Shatabhisha nakshatra in Aquarius, 'cause Saturn represents punishment and Shatabhisha nakshatra is about the hidden things we don't see or we don't even know about. This transit was relevant at the beginning of this year.

Speaking of transit Pluto in Aquarius, since this planet has been placed in my natal 1st house, I started to experience many spiritual awakenings and transformations I don't think I've ever experienced before. I actually had the spiritual awakening somewhere in 2018/19, when transit Pluto was conjuncting my natal Venus in Capricorn and Venus is my 9th house ruler in my natal chart, which is the house of spirituality. I cannot imagine what would happen to me when the transit Pluto will tightly conjunct my natal Ascendant.

In the context of predictions through transit, it's always important to see if some transit planet is currently aspecting your natal planets, not just looking in which your natal house the transit planet is placed. For example, I'll use the transit Jupiter in Gemini. For Sagittarius Rising natives, they've mostly heard that this transit planet is going to be in their natal 7th house of long-term relationships and marriage, which might be the flourishing time for this native if they want to find a new partner. But if they have a Saturn in Gemini in their natal chart, forming a conjunction aspect with the transit Jupiter, it's not going to be very well, because Saturn is about restrictions and hardships. If some of these natives don't have any planets in their 7th house, it's crucial then to look for their 7th house ruler, Mercury. If Mercury, as their 7th house ruler, is placed in Libra and forms a trine aspect with the transit Jupiter, then they can expect some new love to come into their lives.

Overall, that would be everything for today. This will be one of the shortest observations I've ever made, but I hope you won't mind it. The reason why it took me so long to make another post is that I've become busy in my private life. Because I don't have much time for astrology, my personal paid readings will be closed on July 19, 2024 at 10:26 AM UTC, but I'll still be active and make astrology posts here on Tumblr. So, if someone wants to book a reading with me, you can do that until July 19 this year. I hope my readings will be open as soon as possible, but I can't promise you anything so far. Regardless, I wish you all had a beautiful day ahead.

Best regards,

Paky McGee

#astro community #astrology #astro notes #astro observations #astroblr #astrology tumblr #western astrology #astrology community #vedic astrology #pluto #astrology transits #pluto in aquarius #mercury #neptune

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obsessivevoidkitten · 11 months ago

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I don't bring up politics and world events up on here very much, that isn't what this blog is about. This blog is for escapism from reality, but those who are not willing to speak out against brutality are complicit. And this is my largest platform.

Don't continue reading if you don't want to read about war and violence.

Regarding Israel and Palestine I have seen many inaccurate assumptions and outright lies.

1ST CLAIM: One claim I hear ad nauseum is that Gaza elected Hamas and therefore they deserve punishment.

Let's break this down.

A. Hamas was elected around 2006. 17 years ago. They have not allowed elections since.

B. Roughly half of the Gazan population are under 18. This means half the population wasn't born during the last election. This means that of the Gazans who were alive many were too young to vote.

C. Hamas won by a 45 percent plurality, not a majority. This means that less than half of the Gazan who did vote did so for Hamas.

So taking these facts together we can conclude that only a fraction of a fraction of Gazans alive today elected Hamas.

In fact Netanyahu was happy to fund and prop up Hamas because doing so meant dividing Palestinians between the Palestinian Authority in the West Bank and Hamas in Gaza. So Netanyahu is more to blame for Hamas than Palestinians are.

2ND CLAIM: Another thing I hear a lot is that this conflict and all of the casualties are the fault of Hamas. Let me be clear, I do not support Hamas or the October 7th attack that ended up with a civilian casualty rate of around 50 percent, but that one attack doesn't exist alone or without context and nuance as many on the pro-Israel side would have people believe.

No, that attack was one incident in a line of many. Starting with the brutal apartheid, displacement, and ethnic cleansing of Palestinians by Israel.

A slow motion genocide taking place over the course of many decades.

Let's look at some events leading up to and then following Oct. 7th.

It starts with the beginning of Israel. Even the often recited phrase "a land without people for a people without land" erases the existence of native people who had lived there for centuries.

In 1948 you have The Nakba. A mass displacement of Palestinians as Israel took their land. This flew in the face of the UN partition plan, after The Nakba Israel controlled 78 percent of the land, 25 percent more than the UN plan.

This trend of land theft has only continued.

Let's fast forward to more recent events.

2018-2019 The Great March of Return: For over a year there were peaceful marches protesting the Gaza border, this resulted in Israeli forces killing over 220 peaceful Palestinian protesters.

In 2019 Netanyahu admitted support for Hamas to prevent a 2 state solution.

In 2022 journalist Shireen Abu Akleh was targeted and killed by Israeli forces. Israeli forces also attacked her funeral.

Note that during this entire time Palestinians are arrested, even children, and kept in indefinite detention without trial.

In 2023 we then have the October 7th attack. But as you are now aware this isn't where the conflict started.

And clearly not where it has ended.

3RD CLAIM: And that brings us to the 3rd and most blatantly bullshit lie you will here on repeat. The notion that Israel only targets Hamas.

More UN workers have been killed in a 2 month period than have died in any other war since the UN's formation. Over 130.

If they were targeting Hamas then why have so many UN buildings, refugee camps, and hospitals been bombed?

If there goal wasn't civilians then why do civilians make up the majority of the casualities?

Why the medieval style siege/blockade that has caused hospitals to lose fuel and medicine and civilians to go hungry and thirsty?

Why parade civilians around in their underwear? Why laugh and cheer as a UN school is exploded?

Why leave babies in the NICU and force the hospital staff to leave with the promise an ambulance would be provided for the babies only for people to return once the IDF left and find the baby corpses rotting because the ambulance was never provided?

We can even leave Gaza to prove this is not about Hamas. Hamas does not lead the West Bank. And yet Palestinians there are being murdered and arrested at increased rates, their homes stolen by illegal settlers.

Israel officials have called this the Gaza Nakba, they have claimed they will make Gaza inhospitable, they have claimed there are no civilians in Gaza.

Netanyahu has said to remember Amalek.

What is Amalek? Amalek refers to Israels enemy in the bible. This phrase specifically, "Now go, attack the Amalekites and totally destroy all that belongs to them. Do not spare them; put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys"

Israel wants to steal the little land the Palestinians have left. Even now they are herded and concentrated into ever smaller camps with no resources.

Idk what we can do about the situation. This post seems silly for all the good it will do. But maybe it will open the eyes of a couple people. I think that would make it worth it.

#free palestine #free gaza

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melluvsuu · 1 month ago

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“ 𝐋𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐓𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐋 . ”

CHAPTER 01 ──── GOOD ASSISTANT ! ‹3

characters : gojo, makima, megumi, nobara, yuji

context : you start to meet this strange lady, odd enough she takes interest in you, and this random white haired guy too. sooner or later you a 'jujutsu sorcerer' and meet sukunas vessel. twins!!

authors notes : this better blow up or im crying...

warnings : ooc, male!reader, male pronouns, reader referred as 'you', chapter takes place in ep 1 of jjk, plus extra non canon stuff, mistakes probably..

,, 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐔𝐓. 𝜚

UNKNOWN LOCATION

JANUARY 7 , 2009 04:32:18

You wake up to the cool sensation of grass beneath your fingers, soft and damp from the night air. It’s dark—so dark that you can barely make out your surroundings. A thick, inky blackness stretches out in every direction, swallowing the horizon. The sky above has doors—different shapes, sizes, and colours, each standing upright without walls or frames to support them. Some are tall and imposing, carved from dark wood with intricate patterns.

“[Name]-kun.”

You blinked, trying to process the voice. “Who is this?”

A figure stepped into view, you can’t make out the details. It’s human, or atleast looks human. Feminine body, and glowing spiral yellow eyes, “My name is Makima. I assume you're [Name]? Correct.”

You narrowed your eyes, “Yes… Where are we.?”

“My ‘domain’. Hell. There’s really nothing here but us, don’t worry about that white albino paintbrush listening in. Let’s chat!”

She sits down near your head as your body automatically seem to get closer to her lap. She rests her hands on your hair, gently stroking it.

“Let’s make a contract–binding vow, shall we? We’ll discuss this topic at a different time, but for now we can just get to know one another.”

You considered her words, the weight of the offer sinking in.“Alright.”

TOKYO METROPOLITAN CURSE TECHNICAL COLLEGE

JUNE 14, 2015 , 07:27:02

“Wakey-wakey, eggs and bakey~!” The white-haired, blindfolded man exclaimed, turning toward you with a playful grin.

Who is this guy? You thought, feeling the tight ropes binding you and surrounded by a chaotic mix of talismans. As your vision slowly cleared, you studied him closely—he seemed oddly familiar. Why?

“Why am I here?” You managed to ask, still trying to regain your bearings.

The blindfolded man flashed an infuriating smirk, ” Great, just what I needed…” You thought, annoyed.

“For your execution, of course!”

“My execution?”

“Yup, yours! But…”

“But?” you echoed, your confusion deepening.

You watched as he stood up, crossing his arms with a confident air. “You won’t be executed if you agree to be my assistant, [Name]-chan.”

“What—who the hell are you?” You asked, tilting your head slightly to get a better look.

“It’s me, Gojo Satoru. If you accept my offer, you can live. What do you say, hm?”

You sat in silence as he leaned in closer, his breath warm against your ear. “I really need a strong assistant, [Name]-chan.”

“Ugh, fine! Just don’t touch my ear, you weirdo,” you replied, instinctively leaning away from him.

“Fantastic!” he exclaimed, his excitement palpable.

YOKOHAMA , SANKEIEN GARDEN

JUNE 5, 2018 21:48:29

BANG—!

You stepped down hard on the curse’s head, the sickening crunch echoing in the stillness of the night. Disgust twisted your features as you felt the remnants of the creature’s essence ooze beneath their boot.

“Gross.” You spat. You glanced up at the sky, now draped in deep shades of indigo and very few shades of orange.. It was a beautiful scene, the upcoming stars twinkling like distant memories. You could enjoy this scene…

“[Name]-chan, look here!” Gojou shouted.

Nevermind.

“Gojo-sa—”

“Call me Satoru, silly!” he interrupted.

With a resigned sigh, you replied, “Satoru-san, why did you let me exorcize such a weakling?” They removed their black coat, using it to wipe the blood splatter from their face, feeling both exhilarated and slightly exasperated.

“Well, I like seeing you like this!” he said with a smirk, his eyes glinting with mischief.

Noticing a streak of the curse’s blood on Gojou’s cheek, You pointed at it, a playful glint in their eye. “Something wrong, [Name]-chan?”

Gojou looked at the finger pointing at his cheek, and it suddenly clicked for him—you wanted a kiss! Of course, who wouldn’t want to kiss the great Satoru Gojo? He leaned down, dramatically pressing his lips against the spot, a teasing grin on his face. “Is that what you wanted?”

Annoyance flashed in your eyes as they rolled them. “No. There was some blood on your cheek.” You wiped the blood away, their voice steady. “And we have another ‘mission’, we found Sukuna's finger.”

“Well then, let’s get going! Ooh! I also want to stop by a famous mochi restaurant on our way!” Gojo exclaimed, grabbing your wrist and leading them away with an eager tug.

As you walked toward the train station, you felt a sudden presence behind you. A familiar weight settled as someone clung their arms around their neck.

“[Name]-kun,” Came the sultry voice, dripping with irritation. You recognized it instantly—Makima, she was not pleased. “Why did that man kiss you?” She rested her head against his shoulder.

“I… didn’t expect him to do it, so shut up...” You mumbled, swatting her away with a half-hearted gesture

JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL

JUNE 5, 2018 22:02:01

“Under Jujusten Regulation, Itadori Yuji, I will exorcise you as a curse!” Megumi declared.

“Hold up, I’m fine!” Yuji replied, raising his hand in a gesture of reassurance. “Besides, both of us are kinda beaten up,” he added, glancing down at his body where the tattoos—symbols of his connection to Sukuna—began to slowly fade away, like shadows dissipating at dawn.

“We should go to the hospital,” Yuji suggested, his tone shifting to one of concern.

Megumi hesitated, his mind racing, ‘I can’t tell if it’s really him or if it’s the special grade object influencing him, he thought anxiously. Damn, what should I do?’

Just then, a white-haired figure appeared seemingly out of nowhere. “What’s the situation?” he asked nonchalantly, as if he hadn’t just materialised from thin air.

“Gojo-sensei? [Name]-sama? What are you both doing here?” Megumi stammered, momentarily caught off guard.

Gojo chuckled, a mischievous glint in his eyes, although hidden by the blindfold, you could sense it. “Well, I heard from a little birdie that Sukuna’s finger was in the area,” he explained, his tone teasing as he reached for his phone.

He was interrupted as you snatched the device from his hands. “Plus, the higher-ups wouldn’t stop nagging about a missing special-grade object!” Gojo continued, unperturbed. “And I dragged [Name] along while I was out sightseeing. By the way, did you manage to find it?”

“Uh… I ate it,” Yuji confessed sheepishly.

A stunned silence fell over the group. “For real?” You and Gojo echoed simultaneously, eyes wide in disbelief.

“For real,” Yuji and Megumi parroted back.

Gojou strode over to Yuji, bending down to examine him closely. “Hmm, you really did merge with it?” He chuckled as he straightened up, clearly amused by the situation. “Is there anything wrong with your body?”

“Nope,” Yuji replied.

“Can you swap out with Sukuna?” You interjected.

“Sukuna?” Yuji’s brow furrowed in confusion.

“Yeah, the curse you ingested,” You clarified.

“Oh, right! I think I can do that!” Yuji said, giving a thumbs up.

“Alright, give him about ten seconds, then take control back,” You instructed, offering a half-hearted smile to lighten the mood.

“But—” Yuji started, but you cut him off.

“Don’t worry; I’m the strongest,” Gojou smirked, his trademark bravado eliciting groans from both you and Megumi.

“Megumi, hold this!” Gojou tossed a bag into his hands.

“What’s this?” Megumi asked, perplexed.

“Kokufuku from Kikusuian! It’s Sendai’s specialty, and it’s absolutely delicious! I highly recommend the Zunda and Cream flavour!” Gojo exclaimed, his excitement palpable.

As Gojo continued to yap on about his trip and the delicious treats, [Name] couldn’t resist the urge to snag a piece of his Kokufuku. It was every bit as good as he’d claimed, the flavours dancing on your tongue.

“Hey! [Name]-chan, don’t eat my food! That’s really rude!” Gojo whined, eyes wide in faux betrayal.

“Hey, behind you!” Megumi shouted, you pulled him back by his collar just as a special grade cursed spirit lunged at Gojo. You instinctively tensed, knowing all too well how this would end—Gojo would emerge victorious once again because, as he liked to remind everyone, he was ‘the strongest.’

“Look, that kid is still alive after being thrown into a building,” You said sarcastically, feeling the exhaustion seeping into your bones.

“Yeah, it’s about time,” Gojou replied, as if on cue.

As if in response to Gojo's words, Yuji’s tattoos faded once more, his body slumping as Megumi let out a sigh of relief. “Colour me impressed!” Gojou exclaimed, hovering above Yuji. “You can really control it!”

“Yeah, but he’s kind of annoying,” Yuji muttered, aggressively patting his own head, “I can hear his dumb voice in my head.”

“It’s a miracle that’s all he’s doing,” Gojou remarked casually, poking Yuji’s forehead with two fingers, which caused him to immediately pass out.

“What did you do?” Megumi asked, his tone a mix of exasperation and curiosity.

“He knocked him out, Megumi-kun,” You replied, leaning back against the nearby railing, fatigue washing over you. “Can I go home, please? I’m tired.”

“Not just yet, [Name]-chan. If he isn’t possessed by Sukuna when he wakes up, he might have potential as a vessel,” Gojou said, the seriousness of his tone cutting through the lighthearted banter.

“I have a question for you! What should we do with him?” Gojou turned to Megumi, his expression contemplative.

After a moment of thought, Megumi replied, “If he is a vessel, Jujutsu regulations demand that Itadori be executed. However, I don’t want him to die.”

“Is that a personal opinion?” Gojou raised an eyebrow, his smirk fading slightly.

“Yes. It’s a personal opinion. Please do something about it,” Megumi insisted, the weight of his words hanging in the air.

“Well, if it’s a request from a precious student, leave it to me! Now, someone carry Yuji. It seems my beloved future husband has fallen asleep!” Gojou declared with exaggerated enthusiasm.

Megumi turned to you, noticing that you had indeed succumbed to fatigue and drifted off, your head lolling to the side. You must have been really tired��or just really lazy.

“—Wait. Future husband? [Name]-san doesn’t even like you,” he deadpanned, disbelief etched across his face.

“Nuh-uh! He does! He let me kiss him before we came here,” Gojou retorted proudly, a goofy grin plastered across his face. Megumi’s frustration bubbled beneath the surface, and he couldn’t help but feel a strong urge to punch Gojou right then and there.

additional notes : if it has mistakes idc,, uhm yeah woohoo

word count : 1.7k

dont steal or repost my stuff that makes me go crazy!

#❛　　𝒞　　⏖　　melluvs writing.　　𝜚　　𓈒 #jjk x male reader #jjk fanfic #jjk x reader #jjk x ftm reader #jjk x gender neutral reader #jjk gojo #jjk yuji #jjk x csm #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu itadori #jujutsu gojo #jujutsu kaisen #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu nanami #chainsaw man #chainsaw man x reader #chainsaw man x male reader #csm makima

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accio-victuuri · 1 year ago

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NOVEMBER 19 : The Full Story 📝

oh well sort of, cause this is what is known and shared publicly with tons of filling in the blanks by cpfs. someone made a side by side incidents during this day and time for the past years 2017 to now 2023 and it’s good to see it all laid out. it’s hilarious to see the realization among turtles that we could be wrong about their anniversary date. for years, we always talked about the month of June but now, November is making a great argument 😂

( these freakin masterminds are so naughty! I swear!!! 🤣🤣🤣 )

source of the compilation i’m using to outline is 圣衣雪琳 cause they perfectly summed up the key points very well. I already talked about some of these in my previous post but this is for the “11/19 lore” exclusively and so we can expand on other years.

I’m a sucker for timelines so let’s go 💪🏼

2017: At this time, they already know of each other and depending on who you ask might have already been low key stalking the other. LOL. WYB’s was about Just Dance and ZZ is a selfie and hotpot ; the latter post about going home.

I don’t think that this holds much significance in terms of an actual relationship and stuff happening behind the scenes. However, it feels like fate that they both posted on this day even without that significance being there. We cpfs love to talk about how they are fated and certain things, no matter how mundane, turned out to be a piece that completed the puzzle. There is some push back with some turtles saying this shouldn’t be included cause it seems like the start of this 11/19 is 2018 but again, just leaving this here. I could probably add 2015/2016 if we really wanna back track lol

2018: THIS IS THE KEY CPN IN ALL OF THIS. I have already explained it here. The infamous Japan trip. How both of them seemingly making references to their post from this year vs today (2023) especially XZ who even posted on the same time. There are so many rumors about this timeline, even going as far as saying the next day, they started living together. How this was WYB saying it’s WYB, not LWJ. So the relationship they have now is not between fictional characters but the real one.

I’m eating this candy whole. No one can tell me otherwise. I’m sold 🤣🤣🤣

Have we been wrong? did they officially become together 11/19/2018. Some are even pointing out that one of GG’s photos shared today appears to be him traveling back from IM to Beijing.

and who is in Beijing? His home. Yibo. 🏡

We love to think about them sharing photos to each other and i’m imagining this is ZZ sending something similar to WYB and saying that he is on his way back.

2019: Bazaar video was released, it’s message being a favorite among BXGs. Going by the assumption that this is their anniversary of sorts, it makes sense to have a message like that to be delivered.

how he met his love in a dream ( presumably that summer and playing wwx opposite wyb’s lwj ) and when he woke up, his love is still there. meaning even in reality, he still feels the same. no. it was not scripted, the one who shot it said it was xz’s answer and he was shocked too.

youtube

They posted some work related stuff on that day, with WYB’s being audi’s. the part of the caption we are clowning about is : Don’t blame me for not reminding you. Which in the original post and context is about the benefits you will get if you buy an Audi. but in cpn speak it could mean that ZZ probably forget, but he actually didn’t cause that bazaar love confession was clear.

2020: I already talked in detail over here #2 with was going on at the time.

It’s also the start of the whole Thursday is a good day to see you, in reference to WYB’s vogue post. Then it snowballed into a whole CPN of it’s own.

I forgot to add one important thing tho, around this time 11/18 there schedules were public and both are supposed to go back to Beijing. WYB was from Hangzhou and ZZ was from Nanjing. The incident of WYB changing his flight 3x so he can go back to Beijing is this time 11/18. We clowned that he was so eager to be in the same city with ZZ but with what we think now, it could be he wanted them to be together badly because it’s their anniversary the next day 11/19. 🤯

2021: Both of them posting a Douyin video that involves changing clothes. Which is a very common transition trend on the app but seeing it done on the same day was a treat and unusual. GG’s was posted 11/17 and WYB was 11/19.

I wanna remind people too that this is the same month we got the mysterious “voices” both in Shenzhen Vlog ( his husband wang yibo ) and talks of ZZ being at the Luoyang press conference filming. The same month the whole Ximalaya CPN started too. So they were definitely “acting up”.

2022: No actual posts but a parallel. 11/17, Guangdian appeared on the itunes chart because of fan’s effort. 11/18, WYB released a song ( government related ) called Light Chaser. So spotlight = light chaser has similar element and theme of light. Then on 11/20 WYB’s shared a douyin with 👀.

2023: Probably making up for how quiet last year was, they decided to give us a big hint/s of what 11/19 is all about. 😂😂😂

This is all fake and cpn talk. I do enjoy when candies go years back! This journey of trying to piece things together is a bxg’s strength so we’re really thriving today— with all the possibly unrelated events we have managed to stitch together into this! 🙃

#bjyx #yizhan #there is no science here i’m just clowning like i always do #Youtube #i love watching all of us collectively lose our minds over this lol #ok i shall sleep now

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mossxolotl · 7 days ago

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OKAY MASSIVE VENOM THE LAST DANCE SPOILERS AHEAD BUT I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS PARALLEL ALL WEEKEND WHO WANTS TO HEAR ABOUT HOW ONE OF THE SCENES AT THE END MIRRORS A PAINTING I wrote a whole analysis under the cut. I’m normal about this symbiote and you should be too

OKAY SO one specific parallel I found is in one of the final scenes of the movie, as Venom is sacrificing himself and saying his goodbyes to Eddie. The positioning of Eddie’s hand and the framing of the reaching shot feels incredibly deliberate, and seems to be a direct mirror of Michaelangelo’s The Creation of Adam, as shown below:

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN THOUGH?? For some art history context:

The Creation of Adam is a fresco piece created by Michaelangelo on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel in the Vatican. Whilst the frescoes in the Chapel were commissioned by a variety of Popes to a variety of Florentine Renaissance master craftsmen, the collection by Michaelangelo on the ceiling and behind the altar, commissioned by Pope Julius II, are widely considered to be the most important. They depict scenes and figureheads of the Old Testament. The Creation of Adam was made in 1511 and took sixteen days of work to complete.

The fresco depicts an illustration of the moment in Genesis where God gives life to Adam, the first man. It seems to be directly inspired in particular by Genesis 1:26:

“Then God said, "Let us make humankind in our image, according to our likeness"”

The outstretched pose, with the almost but not quite contact, symbolises the divine breath of life, the spark between them that gave mankind life in the first place.

But they don’t touch. Are they reaching out to touch, or are they letting go? If they’re reaching for each other, the painting could depict desire, a want for closeness- and if they’re letting go, an independence, separation, an assertion of “me without you”.

To examine the movie itself: If we look at the screenshot attached, Eddie’s finger placement feels VERY deliberately reminiscent of God’s hand within Michaelangelo’s piece.That outstretched hand, unsure if it’s letting go or grasping out one final time, to Venom’s approaching, then retreating, tendril. Interestingly, though, if Eddie is standing in for God here, he’s depicted in the lower part of the canvas, Venom-Adam approaching from above. This could be reminiscent of His creation becoming “more than him”, ascending beyond His reach.

The roles here are pretty self explanatory. When the symbiotes first landed on Earth in Venom (2018), it was discovered that they could not survive without an oxygen-breathing host, hence the beginning of the symbiosis trials by Drake in the first place. In providing Venom with a suitable environment in which to live, it could be said that Eddie gave Venom life. The inverse could probably also be said to be true- Venom healing Eddie, and providing him with all the strength he does, could be seen as godly acts, especially in the revelation in The Last Dance that he was directly responsible for Eddie’s resurrection. Perhaps one interpretation puts Venom, the strange alien with the ability to keep Eddie walking no matter what, as God initially created Adam with the prospect of eternal life. The other could be stated that Eddie is directly allowing Venom to live in providing him with the perfect host, in a unique way to any other temporary host.

The Venom story in Spiderman can be seen as biblical, anyway - a lot of Venom’s scenes are around churches, and the storyline shows Peter paying for his sins, purging his “inner demon” and being reborn. A lot of Venom’s storylines can be seen in a similar way, with him being a literal personification of a violent, intrusive line of thoughts before he and Eddie find a way to coexist in a healthier (albeit imperfect) way.

The science bit that ties it all together:

A deeper dive into the composition of the fresco reveals a lot more, though. An article written by Frank Lynn Meshberger, MD, makes an argument that the painting can be interpreted in a neuroanatomical manner. The shape of the drapery and the angelic figures around God resemble a human brain, in surprising anatomical detail.

In this interpretation, God is superimposed over the limbic system, which is responsible for emotion, memory, learning, behaviour and motivations. His arm extends through the prefrontal cortex, “the most creative and most uniquely human region of the brain”.

Michelangelo had a lifelong interest in anatomy that extended beyond the artistic, participating in public dissections from a very young age. Thus, it isn’t out of the realm of possibility that this brainlike imagery is entirely deliberate - especially when his religious views are considered. He believed that the divinity we get from God is not life itself, but our intelligence, that it is one thing to give life to stone but another entirely to give it the ability to “try all things received”. In the painting, Adam is completely formed, aware, alive even, so perhaps it is not the gift of life being given in this moment - it’s the intellectual spark that the artist believed makes us human rather than beast, and the awakening of human ability and consciousness.

In this line of reasoning, the symbolism in Venom: The Last Dance makes even more sense with Eddie as the Godlike figure in this instance. In a literal sense, Venom lives within Eddie’s mind when he is dormant, and puppets his body similarly to an external nervous system. More figuratively, though, at this point in the movie, it’s perhaps made most obvious just how much Eddie has changed Venom. He is capable of emotional reasoning, as starkly shown in his sacrifice. He has spent half the movie reminiscing on his and Eddie’s memories. He is very obviously a being that behaves very differently to how he did in Venom (2018), with very different motivations.

Eddie, in metaphorically reaching through that prefrontal cortex towards Venom, has made him more human, has gifted him with that human spark of life and intelligence and human ability to do and to be and to try all things received (and he does, most dramatically, in Venom: Let There Be Carnage, and in his enthusiasm in throwing himself into things Eddie is more hesitant to - singing in the car, dancing, gambling even). And that’s how he dies - humanly, emotionally, simultaneously reaching out to Eddie and letting him go in the same motion, independent from him in a way that is both a first step into individuality, and the last sacrifice he will ever make for his best friend. (Well, boyfriend. Come the fuck on. “You would make a great father” and then the wedding scene cut?? MARVEL WHEN I GET YOU MARVEL)

ALSO THE FACT A PAINTING ABOUT LIFE’S CREATION MIRRORS VENOM’S DEATH?? HELLO. Either this is some massive dramatic opposition for effect or it’s foreshadowing. What if something was created at that moment. Cue the cockroach, cue the whole thing with Knull. Even if we don't get Symbrock back, Venom's probably making a return in some form - Venom or some other symbiote. Teddy's symbiote is still alive, after all - and so is the cockroach.

#venom 3 spoilers #the creation of adam #tw bible #venom the last dance spoilers #venom 3 #venom the last dance #symbrock #venom movie #eddie brock #venom symbiote #venom last dance #veddie #venom

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fordtato · 1 year ago

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From a Palestinian - I know this is long but read it anyways:

If any leftists on this fucking site are using antisemitism to further the Free Palestine movement, you're not fucking helping. Not just because there are Jewish Palestinians. Not just because it furthers the idea that the movement is rooted in antisemitism. And not just because the people who are ultimately going to be impacted by this "activism" are Palestinian families (like my own), who will be on the receiving end of the brunt of government retaliation. It simply isn't helpful and isn't right.

Gaza is an open-air prison, cut off from food and water and medicine and fuel. Even before this recent chapter of the conflict, its people are penned in and brutalized and kidnapped and imprisoned and murdered, without any true relief, and very often without mainstream attention. This is being carried out by the government of Israel (with US government support) and its military, and it is aimed at the ethnic cleansing of Palestinians, a people without any formal military or power. Palestinians in the country are being slaughtered, and Palestinians outside of the country are slowing losing their connection to their identity and homeland and need to watch as their brethren are unilaterally labeled as terrorists and "animals" and killed, raped and buried in rubble.

As a movement we need to acknowledge that Hamas is an antisemitic force. There is no justifying it or going around it. Internet leftists, you're so good at nitpicking at the past comments of online allies and finding the problematic thing someone said on twitter in 2018 and then never defending them again no matter what. But we can't do the same here with Hamas when leaders in the party are antisemitic and when people are dead? We need to defend Jewish people and that doesn't stop here. And nobody dare try to explain to me that this is what a revolution looks like. Those killed weren't all IDF soldiers. And don't explain to me that even colonization and occupation is violence (especially if you live in the US, a colonized nation stolen from indigenous people), because of course I understand that. Palestine has a right to defend itself against violence, but Hamas is explicitly antisemitic and we can't just stand against the ruthless killing of civilians only when it's Palestinian civilians.

Yes, it's complicated. YES this violence and the power vacuums that allow groups like Hamas to take power are very often the response to brutality, and a long-term symptom in the aftermath of European imperialism. We can acknowledge that and understand that and even be sympathetic to the historical context that allows this to unfold while still condemning the death of civilians. After all, being against the death of civilians is at the core of the Free Palestine movement.

Defending Jewish people does NOT mean dismissing the slaughter and literal genocide of Palestinians in Gaza. Defending Jewish people does not mean defending the actions of the Israeli government. And standing with Palestine and freeing it from brutality does NOT mean ignoring that antisemitism is fraught in the world to this day. One part of why Israel is able to garner civilian support despite the atrocities of its government is because not many other countries are taking in refugees of antisemitism, and historically most countries have never protected Jewish people EVER. That is something we need to acknowledge. And acknowledging that does not mean we justify the actions of the government of Israel, and it does not mean we are turning a blind eye to the occupation or the slaughter and ethnic cleansing of Palestinian civilians.

BTW, tone-policing Palestinians about how they talk about Israel while we are in mourning, and collectively witnessing the brutality our loved ones are facing, and literally watching our homeland get destroyed IS HORRIBLE. IT IS UNHELPFUL. IT IS INSENSITIVE AND TONE DEAF. Do not bring up Hamas in my fucking inbox, MY PEOPLE ARE BEING SLAUGHTERED AND LIKENED TO ANIMALS AND I AM FORCED TO WATCH.

The same applies to tone-policing Jewish people when they are getting death threats at synagogues and JCCs and/or are mourning loved ones in Israel. Yelling "but what about Palestine" whenever a Jewish person in America (who has literally nothing to do with the heinous acts of a foreign government entity) mentions they are grieving or afraid or getting death threats doesn't fucking do anything. This isn't activism.

We are all tired. We are all traumatized. We will feel this for generations.

#israel #palestine #free gaza #gaza #Anyways keep antisemitic conspiracy theories and racism out of the fucking replies

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dogwittaablog · 7 months ago

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NOLPATS BURNER ACCOUNT

SO HERE IS THE TEA AND BREAKDOWN ON NOLANS ALLEGED TWITTER BURNER (I also want to apologise for the initial hostile reply to the anon that sent it in I was just taken back cause there weren't upfront receipts).

If you’re wondering how this alleged account was figured out, an anon said someone tweeted about it and decided to look into it... and then now we are here...

SO HERE WE GO!

His FIRST account that went under @ gollpatter the account got suspended (He tweets about it on his second account, but you’re still able to see everything).

So now the account he is using the new one is @ shottergallas.

(So just remember there are two accounts. I know some can get confused lol).

WARNING: I know people are going to be running up the accounts anyways but will say just a heads up you will be finding shit that you don’t like mentioning SA and misogynistic comments, some of the comments are towards the incident of WJC 2018. (If I’m right it’s brought up on @ gollpatter)

Now we may all be here like okay… how do we know or assume it's actually him??? Here is my personal observation

If you look at the following on the first account @ GOLLPATTER. You can see that there are about 4+ people on there that he follows that are obviously his friends and has Steinbach Manitoba in the bio. Some of the content and influencers he follows or interacts with on there also align with his recent or past followings/likes/engagements on Instagram from celebs, influencers, sport hosts and even onlyfangirls (I’ll even get specific if I have to) . His interests are evidently displayed throughout his account... things like MMA, golf, hockey, Joe Rogan, Theo Von and other typical guy shit, but as I said if you followed up on him or paid attention to his Instagram activity it adds up.

(Screenshot of his followings the only thing is they don't follow back)

An Anon that initially sent me the sub on why she thought or had her own conclusions to why she thought it was him which I’ll be copying and pasting the sub down below and adding the links to the info she provided! To make everyone’s lives easier.

here’s the account introducing himself as goll patt: (X)

here’s the account calling jets/ava pond hockey last night: (X)

here’s that account excited about nolan’s friends ‘coggie’ return to the ‘national’ 6 days ago: (X)

and the related headline where Dylan Coghlan, Nolan’s former teammate returned to the NHL from the AHL: (X)

here’s that account being called pat by its friends in the reply of previous tweet: (X)

account being call pats/patty by friends: (X)

same account agreeing with hate on the vegas golden knights as a franchise, praising nic hauge and his wife: (X)

The hockey talk on the account that pop up usually I noticed has pertained to Vegas and the Flyers (some slight shady tweets mostly but nothing over the top) Maybe just some coincidence but I mean hey… we all know what teams he’s played for. Plus there are some Travis Konency mentions on there as well…

So “his” account interacts with the same 2-4 twitter accounts and these accounts tend to tag him in post about Nolpats which I found a bit ironic…

So the last to this which I thought was another eyebrow raiser, was another burner account that has some mutuals but isn't entirely active. Also tagged his account in a post regarding a Tik Tok. The context of the Tiktok was how most likely pro athletes do see the things you post online about them.

So would like to end this off with reminding you that this ALLEGED and there’s no real confirmation it’s him. You’re able to form your own opinion and perspective if you decide to look through and analyse the accounts yourself. I could go on more on some other details, but decided to just touch up on the things that stood out to me. I also was limited to adding content like photos and videos.

#this is probably a whirl wind for some especially once you start looking into the account lmaooo #BUT CANNOT STRESS THIS IS ALLEGED #have to really repeat that #i could probably go on about how I myself wasn't really sure on the account and found some things odd but once you start taking a look #and even looking into the mutual accounts #you kind of start to think theres a slight chance #anyyywaaysss #very interested in what everyones got to say and if you think its fake or real or youre stuck in the middle #also an alleged matt rempe fan too #nolan patrick #my post #np19

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hornyhermitry · 1 year ago

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These are not the Zenins you’re looking for - Naobito & Naoya ramblings and then some

Since there’s no real alternative for longer rants with a personal flavour, let’s give this a shot here on tumblr I guess? Heh.

Preface

General Naobito facts:

71 years → born in 1946, died 2018

Curse Technique: Projection Sorcery

Special Grade 1 Sorcerer

One younger brother - Ogi Zenin

Probably one older brother - unnamed, father of Toji Zenin

(I assume Ogi is younger because they are clearly not twins from the way they look, Ogi looks younger and Ogi’s children Maki & Mai are ca. 10 years younger than Naobito’s son Naoya).

Three sons - youngest son Naoya (27 years in 2018 - born when Naobito was 44)

Fastest Jujucist (except for Gojo Satoru)

Both Naobito & Naoya are names that translate to honesty & straightforwardness. Naobito’s further includes a meaning of “helpful/support”

Hobby: Anime

Favorite food: Sake

Least favorite food: Fishcake

Observations & conclusions from his manga scenes:

Confident, determined, affirmative, tactical (ref. Dagon fight + Jogo appearance right before the burn, doesn’t mind losing an arm, thinks ahead of Toji going for Dagon and jumps in to distract in support)

Cocky & playful, enjoys fighting (often grinning, excited to see Dagon evolve, taunts Nanami “Two 1st grades cannot exorcise (Dagon)?”)

Petty (annoyed by everyone fixated on 4K 60FPS and stupid numbers, retorts to Maki wanting to take Clan Lead)

He was drinking and did not care about Maki leaving the clan. There was no mockery and no attempt to stop her. Only when she said she’d become the next clan head, he asked if he should make her life harder.

He showed up to Shibuya to help out the rest (Maki mocks his drinking habits, with cans next to him he shouts over to her to bring him drinks, but later he nonchalantly breathes into Nanami’s face and we see he actually has not been drinking) and is excited to hear Gojo has been sealed, wants to celebrate.

Maki antagonizes him uncalled for, a bait he does not take but tells her matter of factly she should be the one to go home, to which Nanami agrees.

Assumption based on minor clues

Clan head since the 80s or 90s — depending on circumstances.

→ 2018-1185 (Zenin at the very least date back to Heian times) = 833 years with 26 Zenin clan heads= average leadership of 32 years = his latest “starting date” would have been 1999.

IMO it is very likely he took over earlier than that, because as far as averages go, it usually is way longer spans that are interspersed with very short ones.

(see: “medieval life expectancy was just 31” which did not have most people die at 31 but caused by a high infant mortality seeking the average - you either died as a kid or lived into your 60s).

I think he took over in the mid to late 80s because that sets up the unfortunate situation his family line had to deal with.

On a factual level it’s also not unlikely, because the first half of the 20th century was a chaotic time all around the globe, full of societal shifts and political conflicts that may have potentially led to Naobito’s father/Naoya’s grandfather dying “early”.

Anyway. I present to you:

THE LIFE & TIMES OF NAOBITO ZENIN aka HOLY HEADCANON

The historical context is what makes Naobito so interesting to me and further supports my personal controversial headcanon that:

Naobito & Naoya Zenin are NOT the major players in the, let’s call it “traditional Zenin camp” that exiled Toji and used all kinds of shady internal clan politics to keep power systems up.

Let me take you on a very exhaustive detour on what Naobito being 71 years old in 2018 translates to.

He was born at the brink of World War II and in the wake of the atomic bomb.

During his lifespan, Japan went from a humbled country on its knees to a major player in the global economy, driving technological advancements. During his youth, Japan’s patriotism loosened and a lot of American culture was adapted - the yankii subculture rose to prominence.

JJK readers were told that the Heian era was the peak of jujucists. IRL historically, it was a time famous for many violent conflicts and natural disasters.

Since JJK establishes negative emotions breed curses and cursed energy, this means Naobito‘s young years must have been infested with stronger curses than ever, spawned from the aftermath, suffering, resentment and personal tragedies of WWII, Hiroshima & Nagasaki.

Born in 1946 within months of arguably the worst moment of Japanese history, emerging with a new technique utilising modern animation processes, his potential power upon birth likely matched the new level of curse threats, enabling him to eventually become the fastest Jujucist alive with the use of his modern technique. Growing up in a strongly American-influenced Japan in a rapidly changing world, he was a completely different person than his father (who had seen multiple wars but no massive technological and social progress yet) likely was.

Being the middle child, his father was likely 25-45 years older than him (men back then often fathered their first child between 19 & 23, so I assume he fathered his middle child at 25+), therefore born between 1921 and 1900. This makes him very likely a very hardline conservative patriot who took great pride in the battles he fought in - either during WWI or WWII or even both. A man raised in the spirit of a proud nationalist Japan at the peak of its expansionist mindset across Asia, high in spirits from the successful war against Russia and winning military campaigns in China, Singapore and more East Asian territories. Japan during Naobito’s father’s youth wore uniforms and kimonos.

Whereas Naobito’s social upbringing (outside of his father’s direct influence) was shaped by a more globalist approach and culture, appeasing to the West and showing e.g. through the Olympics of 1964 what a modern country they had become. So when Naobito was 18, Tokyo modernised its post-war infrastructure and built both the Metro as well as the Shinkansen connecting Tokyo and Osaka which kicked off the economic growth in a global spotlight and highlighted how well Japan had rebuilt itself after the defeat 20 years ago. Japan during Naobito’s youth wore slacks, jeans and white shirts. He is old in 2018, but he is a "modern man" in comparison to what came before and he is accustomed to change and progress.

Due to this clash of ideals and lived realities in the world around them, I think Naobito and his father had a very rocky relationship once Naobito entered puberty (and listened to jazz, blues, rock and dressed in blue jeans and leather jackets) and that they had some fundamentally different views on things.

The realities of external life could not have been more different between Naobito’s father and Naobito. Whether it was the world around them or the eventual standing of their clan, Naobito was dealt a very different hand of cards than a very very long line of Zenins in previous generations had been dealt for many centuries.

Due to going up against a man with so much pride and confidence when emancipating himself as his own person, I believe Naobito grew a strong backbone and was a very genuine, upright person - within the limits of his time and upbringing. Much more progressive and less patriotic than his father in any case, which surely was a source of conflict. Yet, I suspect that succeeding in spite of his father’s disapproval is what fueled him to become a more capable and autonomous person than his brothers are and to show that an allegedly inferior curse technique will not hold him back. But Naobito and his father did not only clash about this. In the later Hakari introduction chapter, JJK establishes there are several political factions and some are in favor of traditional millenia old curse techniques like Megumi's 10 Shadows or Gojo's Six Eyes and shun new curse techniques like Projection Sorcery and Idle Gambling that only emerged with new technology. Since sorcerer grades are based on Jujutsu strength and such, people with a modern curse technique are clowned on and not properly being recognized - which applies to both Naobito and Naoya.

The realities of life for Naobito and Naoya are very similar and Naoya’s life is dealing with similar challenges as his father’s. Unlike his father, Naobito was confronted with the reality of established values, routines and social hierarchies becoming horribly moot and due to his own curse technique not being a prestigious one, he was forced to reevaluate the legitimacy of what his father had taught him and what old clans perpetuated. Both in light of the changing world and also his own value as a person and a jujucist. Naoya was confronted with a similar road to growth and reevaluating the classic Jujutsu society & clan values, also having received the same modern technique as his father and witnessing the new kind of strength Toji wielded.

While I do say that Naobito is a different man than his father, I am a firm believer that “the apple does not fall far from the tree” and very much see the likeness between Naobito and Naoya. I feel I should clarify this applies more to personality traits than opinions and I think all three of them are more straightforward and more blunt than the other family lines.

The people readers are told to be suffering by the Zenin family’s actions and opinions are Maki and Toji.

Both of which are not Naobito’s children. They are children of Naobito’s older and younger brothers.

Naobito’s unknown older brother exiles Toji due to him being resented and seen useless by the majority of the clan for not having techniques or energy, Naobito’s younger brother Ogi and his wife raise Maki & Mai in a cruel way, on top of that Ogi is shown to secretly plot behind people’s backs and be involved (with e.g. Jinichi) in inner-clan intrigues and betrayal. Funny enough, Toji himself is shown to be as much of a schemer (as seen through his bounty plan) and backstabber (pun intended) in line with his upbringing.

Naoya & Naobito on the other hand speak their mind openly, announce their gripes and do what they want. Naoya and Naobito are not schemers, they very much are -in accordance with their names - straightforward.

Naoya is many things, but he is not a liar.

Both Naoya and Nabito are eccentrics with a very flashy style that does not conform to plain traditions:

Naoya with his piercings and dyed hair (I’ve previously mentioned his white hakama being unusual for men, which still holds true, but it is not uncommon for high rank swordsmen to wear white ones, so I have now come to conclude these indicate his rank as Chief of the Hei) and Naobito, as an old man, sporting this over the top moustache.

There is an idiom about Japanese society that the nail who sticks out gets hammered down. Both Naoya and Naobito are doing everything to stand out and refuse to fall in line with unreflected traditional actions.

Both have not inherited the Ten Shadows technique but Projection Sorcery - as a result, both are on their own side which aligns more with the reformer side (that contains other Jujucists such as Hakari & Kirara who also have modern techniques), than the conventional conservatives (such as the higher ups or the Kamos. On that note, take a moment to reflect on the implications of Maki and Mai wearing modern school uniforms while Kamo Junior wears a uniform that much more resembles traditional clan attire: The Kamos are as conservative as the Zenins and probably more so than Naobito).

Both Naobito and Naoya are denied their perceived birthright purely by the unfortunate existence of Gojo Satoru and his Six Eyes, and Megumi having the 10 Shadows Technique, for the first time in hundreds of years denying the Zenin’s claim to fame.

Since Gojo was born 1989, I personally like to imagine Naobito tasted clan leadership as “the strongest” (and, in his case, fastest) for at least a few years before the one to change the world’s balance was born - simultaneously stealing Naobito’s position at the peak of the Jujutsu world and also denying that of his at that point two sons. Toji was already past the point of manifesting a cursed technique and therefore all existing “sons” of the Zenin family were ruled out to take their clan’s glory back from Gojo Satoru.

So Naobito tried and succeeded in having another son - I believe this is why Naoya was fathered by him as late as at 44 years. All hopes to restore the waning Zenin power were now on this little boy growing up. Would he be the one to manifest 10 Shadows and make the Zenin a worthy competitor to the Gojo clan again?

No.

Naobito, at this point already several years into watching his clan’s decline, lost the last bit of hope to restore its glory by traditional means and standards when his son manifested his very own curse technique: Projection Sorcery. Personally, I believe that your curse technique is heavily related to your personality - or call it soul if you like - and both Naobito and Naoya having the same technique reflects their similarity in character.

So Naobito raised Naoya to try and surpass the competing Gojo Six Eyes boy even without inheriting the jackpot technique.

While I do believe that Naoya was pampered by servants and women growing up, being the son of the Clan Lead and future Zenin heir in a long line of proud Jujucists, I also coin Naobito as one to give tough love, and demand a lot and would assume Ogi resented him because he would remind him of his own lack of potential, lack of power and lack of future.

On the topic of Ogi:

He is a weak, bitter man who holds resentment for everyone around him and blames everyone but himself for his shortcomings.

Being the youngest brother, his upbringing was different from Naobito‘s and I imagine that especially after witnessing his father and older brother argue and clash, he tried to suck up to his father by being a yesman to all his views and often tried to throw his older brothers under the bus and snitch about his activities.

He has always been a miserable rat with no backbone, hoping for another authority figure to spoonfeed him power.

He never learned that power is not given but taken and failed to take ownership for his life and actions right until his death.

Toji‘s father/Naobito‘s older brother:

I have little thoughts about Toji‘s father/Naobito‘s older brother, but I think he also clashed with his father and (this is super out there) maybe refused to take responsibility despite being the firstborn son and had no interest in leading the clan. I think he was on good terms with Naobito either way and I can see the two of them in their late teens/early 20s out in town, wearing jeans, pomade in their hair, smoking, flirting and riding around on motorbikes with Ogi nagging on the backseat how irresponsible, shameful and reckless they are while they tell the miserable virgin to shut up and learn to be a man.

(In fact, this is the Zenin backstory I want to read and write about, hahaha).

I consider it possible Ogi remained unmarried/a virgin for most his life and only decided to marry a few years after Naobito‘s youngest son Naoya had also failed to manifest Ten Shadows, in a last ill-guided attempt to steal his brother‘s superiority by fathering a child with the golden curse technique. Unfortunately Maki and Mai did not get it either and, to add insult to injury, were girls. Ogi must have been seething about his unlikely decision to marry after all. Possibly he was talked into it by others in the Zenin clan who did not hold Naobito and his ways and his son Naoya in high regard - considering them too unruly and progressive, affirming their future support to Ogi‘s line if he ever takes action.

Either way, I think Ogi and Naobito (and Naoya) are on bad terms and Ogi is a weak rat that deserves to be stepped on by greater people.

Most readers sympathise with Maki and Megumi and their goals and views because that‘s the lense through which we see the story, but take a step back to think about the legitimacy of it for a moment.

Maki leaving the clan is fair, but why would she (or unwilling Megumi) be suitable candidates for leading what‘s essentially a business with lives and salaries and adult people in national positions of power and military units? The thought of it is absurd. It‘s only natural for Naoya, who was raised into this responsibility from a young age, to be outraged over a noname teenager stealing his legacy from him the moment he was supposed to get it in his mid to late 20s. It’s as outrageous as Gojo taking it from Naobito.

My personal headcanon on Naobito’s drinking habit is that it formed in his later years, after Gojo’s curse technique emerged. Struggling to come to grips in his mid 50s, after a life lived for the Zenin legacy for ultimately nothing, watching the power loss and decline of relevancy the Zenin hold after the unfortunate event series - Toji energyless and exiled - Gojo born with Six Eyes - Naoya not having Ten Shadows - from the sidelines of history and the center stage of his clan, with his older brother & his father definitely already dead at this point and him being left with the joke of a person that Ogi is, he took to drinking. “If it‘s all drifting into irrelevancy, I might as well sit back and have a drink in my remaining years.” Something to this extent. In line with this, writing Megumi into his will was a drop in the ocean and at this point no dent in the current state of the clan already past its prime in his eyes.

And yet, old Naobito, leader of the most powerful and wealthy Jujutsu clan (who does not need money) goes to help with the curse outbreak in Shibuya. Sober, despite Maki‘s claims.

And he does not pull a Kusakabe avoiding the curses roaming around but genuinely puts in effort to defeat Dagon and save Maki (who left the clan) after telling her to go home (which against all reason she refuses out of teenage thickheadedness and nearly dies burnt to a crisp as a consequence).

Whereas her father, Naobito‘s little brother Ogi, throws her into a cursed pit to die.

Now, as for Naoya.

Unlike Maki's mother, he does not try to stop her from getting to the curse tools. Unlike her father, he does not throw her into a cursed pit to die. Unlike Jinichi he is not involved in a plot to have her killed.

He mocks her for having an ugly face, rendering her a total failure (on top of not having CE and being a bad fighter). Compared to what everyone else is doing to her, that is really tame.

What I find interesting and most people oddly gloss over, is how he asks her if her plan is to stay in the shadow of Megumi and Yuta.

The implication of this is that he looks down on her choice to tag along behind two other boys — instead of rising up to defeat the odds stacked against her which he potentially considers her capable of. If he was not considering her worthy of being her own person, why would he mock her for being in the shadow of those two? Much like Naobito raised Naoya with tough love, I think this (unconsciously) is a jab at Maki to take Naoya and Naobito as a role model (instead of her weak father) and rise to greatness despite the odds. Somewhere in that douchebaggery of his, he considers her biggest fault her passiveness and acceptance of other people’s low opinion of her and tries to get her to snap and rethink. Be the rebel that Naobito and Naoya also are and were.

I think Naoya, with his definition of and thoughts on strength, his contrarian taunting of everyone else in the clan after his father’s death, had plans to reform the Zenin clan in his own vision once his time as a head comes, to mare sure it will be sustainable in a new age of Jujutsu with less outdated ways of thinking. Naoya has his own agenda. He is not following anyone else's. He does not care for Sukuna's plans, he does not care about Kenjaku's plans. He does not care about Gojo's or Maki's plans (the latter ofc only up until she is all up in his face with her actions) he just wants to get promoted, nothing more. That's not any bizarrely evil masterplan, just a guy trying to steer his life in accordance with his personal vision and goals.

One of my most genuine headcanons about Naoya is that, without Maki and Megumi, he’d have been with Hakari’s and Kirara’s reformer faction and wouldn’t ever have been perceived as an antagonist at all. Because he is not a villain, he is an antagonist, and specifically for Maki & Megumi - he has zero personal agenda with the rest of the cast (aside from Gojo in the broadest sense, but in the same way his father already had it and just lived with it).

Naoya’s whole life revolved around two things: eventually stepping up to lead the clan and to prove himself worthy despite an inferior curse technique, so naturally Megumi stealing the head position from him with contractual fineprint pisses him off to the max. And then to add insult to injury, his “untalented, ugly little cousin” runs amok and slaughters the clan he was supposed to inherit right under his nose. Which he, interestingly, kind of brushes off like water under the bridge and just mocks her for being heartless. He holds no sentimental feelings towards those people murdered there, going by his lack of reaction. And does not care about the Zenin legacy being wiped out for the most part. Which hints at him having prepared for a reform that has now become moot through Maki’s actions.

Now only his other goal in life remains. To be the strongest next to Toji and Gojo. And had Maki not challenged that, had it been anyone else over a different topic, he would not have cared. But his biggest insecurity aka driver was prodded and his arrogance and refusal to acknowledge strength in another Zenin child not him became his downfall. On that note, I also do not consider him a misogynist in particular - he is a petty, spiteful instigator and goader and shittalks everyone. He baits Jinichi into attacking him, he baits Maki in a sexist way, he shittalks women in front of his aunt and he shittalks his brothers to Choso. He does not exclusively single out women to disrespect, he disrespects ANYONE. (Like young Gojo by the way, who behaved the same before he met Geto - all these kids raised into clans, especially as child prodigies set up for future greatness, have little respect for others. A baseline a big ego and a certain arrogance and always feeling better than the rest, no natural instinct to care for others and no respect for established rules are traits both share. Fortunately, Geto opened Gojo’s eyes on the responsibility of strength and taught him some consideration and at least a little humility and kindness. Otherwise, Gojo and Naoya would indeed be standing right next to each other, in arrogance and disrespect for those lower than them).

For what it’s worth, I think Naoya is sexist but the one who is an actual misogynist is Ogi. And that’s why Naoya’s treating Ogi’s wife and daughters mockingly the same way their father/husband does. Yes, there is a difference between sexism (crude prejudice and discrimination) and misogynism (actual contempt and dislike/hatred of women). And while we’re at it -- most of Jujutsu society’s clan-raised peers (vs. random recruits like Yuji, Yuta, Todo) will be sexist. They just don’t get a chance to show it in the manga because their arcs revolve around other things. Kenjaku, Sukuna, Gojo, are all certified sexists given their upbringing and backgrounds.But their stories are different ones, so it’s not likely to come up. Although there has been Gojo’s remark about scary women and Sukuna looking forward to killing women - just saying.

Personally, I don’t see characters or people IRL as good or bad, that’s a childish way of thinking and in such narrow simplistic boxes that only fit in children’s cartoons. People are people. Flawed. Everyone has flaws and everyone has reasons why they have those flaws. Some people click better with your own flaws, some end up causing issues in your life. One bad trait and deed or one good trait and deed doesn’t make or break a person. It’s the sum of what you repeatedly do. Intentions are secondary, the outcome of your actions makes it real. “Who’s worse? The demon who killed 2000 humans or the human who told another human her face is ugly?” is a stupid game to play, especially on childish claims like “oh but sexism is real” like death and murder aren’t just because your sheltered little life has been free from them so far. Grow up and start recognizing the realities of physical violence. Anyway. Naoya mocked Maki for being unable to find a husband with her scarred face, her father threw her into a pit to kill her. People who think Naoya is her issue need to get a grip.

The Zenins you are looking for are not this line of the family but the rest.

And I wanna drink sake and watch anime with Naobito. And listen to him telling me stories from his 30s in the late 1970s.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk shibuya arc #naobito zenin #jjk zenin #naoya zenin #zenin family #headcanon #maki zenin #jjk manga spoilers #jjk spoilers #jjk thoughts #jjk theory #zenin naoya #zenin maki #zenin naobito #ogi zenin #zenin clan #jjk

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sweetbottletops · 4 months ago

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Well I don't think her Clark Kent glasses have fully slipped off around two of them, but it's a cute thing for Chizuru to say.

Ch 92

Koga out here just existing as the school flows around her. All of that anxiety the day before and it was shorter lived than that Walmart yodeling boy in 2018. The attention market is saturated these days.

You're a main character to Aya and your friends, but ultimately it takes quite a bit more to be that for a whole school, thank god. (Koga’s goofiest face to date. What even...)

Chizuru doesn't know Koga Rizzuki as well as she thinks. She really needs to let the other two into the secret and not wait til the wedding invites arrive. I really want to see the whole group at the CD shop someday, dammit. (that bonus booklet exists in the bubble universe and doesn't count)

It is nice she's not self assigning outsider status anymore and can feel their friendship better.

Chekhov's maths book.

I don't feel like we've met him before. He's not the guy who bumped into her with her crutch, right? Probably an entirely new Jerkface.

I’m going to put my bet in and say this is about the school festival. It probably looks to him like she’s working out lyrics in a school notebook and thus is a school music related event.

Hard to piece out by what "That 'thing'?" means with this being a translation, but the context is music lyrics. It's probably written in English, but still looks like lyrics.

Hopefully it isn't too exposing, but Koga seems to use Aya as a muse on some level so... that might be exposed in the lyrics some way. (Not in a homophobic way, the manga hasn't really included that downer, but an emotional reveal that has gone over Aya's head since she doesn't know English).

Maybe there's a music "thing" going around that's not the festival, but it's probably been about a year since the last one so easiest explanation.

#the guy she was interested in wasn't a guy at all #arai sumiko #green manga #yuri #manga #kinioto

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ultra-violet-heart · 11 months ago

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THE 2018 DENGEKI BUNKO INTERVIEW WITH 86--EIGHTY-SIX AUTHOR ASATO ASATO

Disclaimer: This translation is made by me for fandom purposes only. This interview, conducted in 2017, gives major insights on how the sci-fi mecha series 86--EIGHTY-SIX was conceived and written before it eventually won the Dengeki Novel Prize back in 2016.

Please ask my permission and credit me+this post if you will be re-translating this to other languages. PLEASE DO NOT REPOST ON YOUTUBE AND TIKTOK AND PLEASE DO NOT REPOST THE IMAGES ON THIS INTERVIEW. Please take the fan translations here with a grain of salt.

Credits to @Yashamise from Twitter for copies of this Dengeki Bunko Kono Light Novel ga Sugoi magazine.

Erratum: This interview was conducted and printed in 2017, but this Kono Light Novel ga Sugoi magazine is dated 2018 as an advance issue of sorts. This interview has been summarized here. My apologies for the title.

I’m posting my Ko-Fi here as currently, I’ve been having financial trouble regarding my medicine, so if anyone can donate, I would be much grateful for the help, thank you very much.

AN INTERVIEW WITH 86--EIGHTY-SIX AUTHOR ASATO ASATO

“I wrote what I liked, in the way I liked them,” this author says. This tale is filled with the grief from war, the ugliness of racial discrimination, as well as the romance of mechas and of garter belts! In this interview, she reveals to us everything about its roots and its appeal!

Text and Composition: My Street

Illustrator: Shirabii

Translator’s Note: For purposes of this interview translation, the interviewer will be labelled as “MS” for My Street, since they layouted and probably conducted this transcribed interview. Also, for words that have brackets or parenthesis:

{} = implied by context

() = given emphasis/given parenthesis in the interview itself

[] = included in the footnotes/translator’s notes

A robot lover as far as she could remember

MS: Thank you very much for your time today for this interview. It was surprising to learn that the author {for 86--EIGHTY-SIX}, Ms. Asato, is a woman.

ASATO: I get that a lot (haha). My family says the contents of my work is just “the usual {for Asato}” though. I think my Afterwords have the impression they’re written by a woman, and I never hid that in particular (haha).

MS: This year {2018}, 86--EIGHTY-SIX placed first in the New Works category and second in the bunkobon {paperback} category overall. How do you feel about this now?

ASATO: I’m very happy. I knew of KonoRano’s existence [1], so I was hoping {86--EIGHTY-SIX} might be listed there somewhere, but it was a surprise that it placed higher than expected. As I said in this interview’s foreword: “I wrote what I liked, in the way I liked them.” I’m thankful that many readers found it interesting.

MS: For readers who haven’t heard of 86--EIGHTY-SIX, can you give us a summary of this work?

ASATO: It’s a lively, filled-with-clanks story of the protagonist Shin, his merry band of thieves, and their remotely-working-class-president Lena. [2] (LOL)

MS: 86--EIGHTY-SIX is your debut work. Can you tell us about the time you started writing this work?

ASATO: I’ve been writing ever since I can remember, and I started with writing manga {scripts}. I switched to writing novels around before I started junior high school and have been writing them ever since.

MS: You’ve been interested in robots and military-related things ever since elementary school, is that right?

ASATO: Yes, that’s correct. My mother liked {Space Battleship} Yamato [3] and Gundam, and as I have a younger brother, I got into watching and reading anime and manga targeted at boys. I was rarely exposed to anime and manga targeted at girls. We had the Mobile Suit Gundam movie trilogy [4] at home (which I’ve seen many times), and I also watched The Brave Police J-Decker [5] and The Brave Express Might Gaine [6], as well as other shows in The Brave [7] series. The only anime I had watched that is {targeted at girls} is Magic Knight Rayearth [8], which is another story with robots fighting in it (haha).

MS: I reckon such an environment led you to writing 86--EIGHTY-SIX. Can you tell us about your writing process?

ASATO: I originally submitted {works} to the Kadokawa Beans [9] Bunko Newcomer Awards. I avoided the Dengeki Novel Prize as it was rather {too hard to enter} due to the large number of entries [10] there. The novel entry I made on the 21st year of the Dengeki Novel Prize (2014), however, was totally not aimed at women at all, so I didn’t have any other choice but to submit that to said contest, as it has the closest deadline. It was a sci-fi fantasy work, with a theme of redemption, set on a time before and after {a} revolution. At that time, I thought, maybe I can go past beyond the 3rd round of screenings and unexpectedly, maybe placed on a good spot? However, the evaluation I got from the judges were “This is a 100% a work targeted at girls” and “Next time, we hope you will submit a work that should be Dengeki Bunko-like”. As Dengeki Bunko [11] is an all-kinds-of-genre publication, I didn’t know what ‘Dengeki Bunko-like’ even meant. I thought about it a lot but couldn’t figure it out, so I just kept on writing and finished my next entry, which is 86--EIGHTY-SIX.

MS: How did you come up with the idea and structure of 86, a war drama where unmanned drones and “unmanned manned drones” battle each other?

ASATO: I once read a newspaper article whose main message was “It won’t be good if a country sends its citizens to war, but it shouldn’t be a problem if they made an army of foreigners fight in their stead.” In that case, I felt very afraid that other people will be forced to fight instead of us, with the idea of “those aren’t people, but drones” justifying this and everyone just allowing it {to happen}.

MS: As written in Volume 1’s Afterword, looking back at history, it. is true that racism and racial exclusion existed to no small extent. So, why did you decide to incorporate “racism” into your work?

ASATO: Ever since I started writing novels, I have repeatedly written about boundary lines between “human beings and those who are human but not treated as human beings”, with 86--EIGHTY-SIX being in a similar vein. One of the bases for this is probably the class discrimination found in Final Fantasy Tactics [12], for example. A character there, Argath, who is an aristocrat, tells a commoner character: “But the gods have no eyes for chattel! [12]” This line has stayed with me ever since. After that, I continued to write with the motifs of “human beings and livestock in human form” and “human and those considered not humans”. I think BLACK/MATRIX+ [13] influenced me as well. This game deals with ethnic discrimination, set in a world where black-winged people are ruled over by white-winged people. In there, those who were discriminated against were treated harshly. They were treated like livestock, with the game having this line of, “Why is a mere slave like you wearing clothes?”

MS: Do you often play games?

ASATO: When my gaming consoles weren’t connected yet to the Internet, I used to play a lot of RPGs. I’m not good at action games. I did play a lot of Final Fantasy, like Final Fantasy VI, Tactics, VIII, IX, and X [14].

MS: Are there other works which influenced you? I wonder if there’s something similar like the war situation in Knights of Sidonia [15], which was mentioned in Volume 1’s afterword.

ASATO: I often watch a lot of robot shows, Knights of Sidonia included. In addition to the Gundam series mentioned earlier, I also watched Full Metal Panic [16] and Gunparade March: A New Song for the March [17]. It’s not a robot series, but I also have read Battle Faery Yukikaze [18] over and over. I like {literary} structures where the protagonist side is overwhelmingly inferior while the antagonist side is the superior one. I want to see the flow of emotions from the characters more than the fight scenes themselves. I think emotions such as fear, resignation and desperation show more in situations where {characters} are hopelessly in a big disadvantage. Winning a battle by domination can be exhilarating, yes, but those other emotions don’t show as much during that. That’s why I prefer for the protagonists to win through unrefined and tenacious means, rather than them winning by outsmarting {enemies}.

The work’s influences from horror films and in-depth military research

MS: The Legion are getting more ominous, and the deteriorating situation for Shin and his group is putting them on a very big disadvantage, if I’m not mistaken.

ASATO: 86--EIGHTY-SIX has been influenced more by horror movies than robot anime, with it being based on movies such as The Mist [19] and Screamers [20]. Mist is a horror story where the protagonists get trapped in a supermarket due to a mysterious fog and monsters, and the people gradually lose their ability to make rational judgments as they are unable to defend themselves or escape, without any rescue in sight. This horror movie has a great ending, so I’m inviting you all to watch it without further spoilers. 86--EIGHTY-SIX was initially set as a novel about a fog of nanomachines covering the walls outside of the Republic, and the “Legion” being an aggregation of said nanomachines. However, that kind of thing couldn’t exactly be defeated by conventional weapons, so it was rejected at the setting phase. These elements from this setting, however, were retained in the form of Volume 1’s final boss character and the appearance of those electromagnetic jammers clouding the sun.

MS: It’s rather surprising this came from a horror setting.

ASATO: The other {inspiration mentioned earlier}, Screamers, is a sci-fi horror film where autonomous war weapons evolved on their own and went out of control. In 86--EIGHTY-SIX, the Self-Propelled Mines, which look like wounded soldiers, are based on Screamers. The work is rather interesting as one has no ideas who their enemies are and everything else looks suspicious.

MS: So you have a situation like this, and you applied what kind of emotions you want to be shown in that situation, correct?

ASATO: Yes. Looking back, I think I was strongly influenced by the novel Chaos Legion [21] {in this regard}. Shin’s Personal Mark, which has a shovel on it, was influenced by his special ability as well as his role being the “Undertaker” responsible for collecting the fragments of his comrade-in-arms’ {Feldreẞ} units.

MS: The more I hear about it, it seems this work is really packed full of things {you} like.

ASATO: While I was writing this, I played the Black Hawk Down [22] movie repeatedly instead of just background music. It’s also a favorite {movie} of mine.

MS: I would like to ask you about military-related matters. What kind of material did you use for your research?

ASATO: I borrowed all relevant materials I use from the library, so I don’t have any specific references… About racial discrimination, I read materials about Nazi Germany [23], the internment camps in US as well as the 442nd Infantry Regiment [24] and Scroll of Agony: The Warsaw Ghetto Diary [25]. As for the weapons, the Juggernaut and the Legion are based and patterned from tanks, so I’ve read materials dating back from World War II [26] as well as the Gulf War [26], where 120mm tanks were the main weapons used. The Juggernaut’s 57mm cannon wasn’t used very often, so I had a difficult time finding research material for it. The unit itself is based on the M551 Sheridan [27]. This airborne assault tank has aluminum alloy armor, but the Juggernaut reflects the pitiful aspect of said flimsy armor which explodes upon impact by any stray attack.

MS: Why did you make the Juggernaut and the Legion multi-legged tanks?

ASATO: Because it’s romantic! I love multi-legged tanks! My first exposure with them is the X-ATM092 [28], a spider-shaped mobile unit from FFVIII. The loud, resounding footsteps it produced as it chased you away was very scary, and it left this impression of being a symbol of a very powerful weapon. I also like Ghost in the Shell’s Tachikoma [29] and the Tobigumo from the Swallowtail novel series [30]. In reality, multi-legged tank units aren’t really fast enough, and there is too much ground pressure for those to actually carry a 120mm cannon… but I make up for it with my imagination (LOL)

A character that embodies the idea of “to be human” walks alone

MS: Concerning those people called “Eighty-Six”, what do you think it means “to be human”, which you tried to depict in Volume 1?

ASATO: What I tried to depict in this work is “to respect other human beings, and to live without regrets.” However, I don’t think everything I wrote in this main part is actually correct. I think this is the answer the “Eighty-Six” came up with due to the environment they lived in. In Volume 2, the stage now shifts to the Federacy, so the theme there is now what will happen if said environment has changed.

MS: In Volume 2, I see this as a story where the “Eighty-Six”, who managed to get safety for the time being, nevertheless still returned to the battlefield. I think this sentiment was portrayed very well.

ASATO: Volume 3 will focus on what happens inside {Shin’s head} after he made that choice, so please look forward to that. After all, they don’t feel safe even after coming to the Federal Republic of Giad. And the war against the Legion isn’t over yet. Since the Eighty-Six think they will not survive if they don’t fight, I think they will continue to fight until the Legion disappeared. Then… what will they do after the Legion are eventually gone? …They will certainly have to think about that in the future as well.

MS: Do you have a favorite among all the characters?

ASATO: It’s Raiden. Of course, I love the two protagonists, Shin and Lena, but Shin isn’t really a very cooperative character with me, so I have a certain attachment to Raiden, who provides much support. Instead of simply just crafting the plot, I write in a way that captures how each character would act in line with {the type of} world I've created. That’s why I do not know what the characters think, what goals they have, or what pasts they bear unless they “talk” to me. Shin is not the type {of character} to talk about anything in particular, and he doesn’t even say anything much except for his name. It wasn’t until I finished writing that climax of a battle in Volume 1 that I realized what he was fighting for. After I wrote it, I was like, “Huh?! So, this is it?!” and was surprised as the author (LOL).

MS: So, you didn’t think about Shin’s background at first?

ASATO: Yes, that’s right. During that climax, I finally understood {everything} concerning Shin, so I went back on that part and wrote the details that I then added.

MS: So even at the plotting stage, you haven’t put together the {setting and background} for each of the characters?

ASATO: To begin with, when I wrote Volume 1, I haven’t even made a plot. I didn’t even have a story structure in particular, and just wrote while letting the characters act. The first time I finished this volume, the last two pages were still missing, but Shin brought them to me, saying, “Sure enough, write up to this far.”

MS: What happened after Volume 2?

ASATO: I have submitted the plot… but stressed on the important scene that “I won’t know everything until I write it” then submitted it. As a result of this, only the boss character from Volume 3 remained in that plot I submitted. {I caused} my editors a lot of trouble.

MS: How did Frederica (the character) come to be?

ASATO: Frederica is a character with a part further on in the series, so I intended to debut her in Volume 2. As I was writing her, however, it seemed she and Shin have similarities on what they carry on their backs. Since then, she acts as a mirror to Shin. As Shin is a character who is not very good at grasping his own emotions, {I had Frederica} serve as the one who verbalizes those emotions. I wondered then, what does it mean to have a 10-year-old verbalize {another person’s feelings}? (LOL) I simply wanted to show a little girl. In Volume 2, the heroine, Lena, is absent, but I can’t have another girl the same age as her as this volume’s heroine… and so, under this pretext, I brought out {Frederica as} the little girl heroine.

MS: For some reason, I thought there’s other many works featuring little girls in the battlefield.

ASATO: If this were about a real battlefield, it would have been filled with old men. I like older men soldier characters, so that would have been fun to see, but I don’t think readers would find that interesting. Cute little girls adding a touch of color {to a work} is important (LOL).

MS: Did you decide on the setting from the start?

ASATO: The setting was generally decided from the beginning. The scenes were written out as needed. For example, regarding the battlefield, the Legion are ground-based weapons, and it would be troubling if they’re easily eradicated by aircraft weapons. That’s why {I had} the Eintagsfliege, a Legion unit which has jamming, and restricted the use of aircraft and communication devices. This, however, would have prevented Shin and Lena from communicating with each other, so I then devised the special communication device called the Para-RAID.

MS: How deeply did you think about this world’s setting on itself?

ASATO: The necessary scenes have been chosen in detail, otherwise, the rest of the details aren’t fixed. For example, it’s not in the main story, but the Republic’s population has already been decided upon. It’s the reverse with the countries on the edge of the continent that aren’t scheduled to appear, as they might have a Chinese-like culture… that’s all I thought of it right now. There’s also this “sensory tuning”, which hasn’t been written in the setting yet, but is scheduled to be involved in the future part of the plot. However, as I said just a short while ago, the story {as a whole} is influenced greatly by how the characters act, so it depends on them to make the best use of the setting. From this point on, who will survive and who will die… is something that I still don’t know.

MS: Is it still unknown how the war against the Legion will move forward?

ASATO: The basic points {for that} have been decided, with the foreshadowing being built onto step by step. However, it is up to those two, Shin and Lena, if they will follow suit. (LOL)

MS: What about the Legion, then?

ASATO: About the Legion, the setting about them has been solidly established, including the future boss characters. However, I can’t say anything about them yet. Details about them have been foreshadowed little by little. I write hoping the readers will be surprised by this later.

The love for garter belts explodes! A talk about eroticism

MS: Changing the subject, what it is about your particular fixation towards garter belts [31] and pilot suits [32], both of which you spoke so passionately about in your Afterwords?

ASATO: About the pilot suits, on the outline for volume 2, I wrote "I don’t want men’s pilot suits paired with ground-based armaments!!!" using half of the A4 outline paper and submitted that (LOL). I’ve wondered whether pilot suits are really necessary, apart from space or aircraft or even ground battles. I’ve my doubts about it, and with said doubts I don’t want {characters} just wearing pilot suits, even in a robot thing. I do agree with the editor-in-charge about “Female pilot suits are justice!” so Lena wearing a pilot suit is scheduled to appear in the future [32]. After all, the garter belt shows a good place between sexy and cute. I think the eroticism {from the garter belt} dwells in its self-contradictory element: it’s just one additional item {in a set of clothes}, and somehow manages to show more skin―I think that’s the charm of the garter belt. In particular, if the color {of the garter belt} contrasts strongly with the skin color {of the wearer}, the impression of bare skin is more emphasized in spite of the wearer. Because of this, I think it’s wonderful that Shirabii colored the belt part {of Lena’s garter belts} black.

MS: It’s amazing the garter belt drawn by Shirabii has the functions of both a belt and a ring, isn’t it?

ASATO: Furthermore, Lena’s military uniform, a garment that is very much seen in public, has garter belts, which are usually private items, and I think that adds further to her ambivalent charm even more. As a matter of fact, at first, I argued that it would be better if {her} thighs were not visible all the time but could be glimpsed at occasionally, but after a 2 AM discussion with the editors-in-charge while looking at the rough draft of the cover art, they convinced me that “That ‘occasionally’ should be now!”, and we settled on its current form. The ideal situation {we have} was when {Lena} lifts her legs up and a glimpse of the black lace garter can be seen through the slit of {her} dress. However, as Lena is a prim and proper lady, the only situation I can think of where she lifts her legs while wearing a dress is when she is about to wear heels… I’ll have to ask Shin to do his best on this one.

MS: Rather a difficult situation, isn’t it?

ASATO: It’s Shin, after all. Also, a military uniform with pretty boy shorts + sock garters is also cute, and as Theo hasn’t appeared with his military uniform yet, I’m thinking to add that to his outfit now… (LOL). However, middle-aged soldier uncles shouldn’t show their bare legs with shirt garters! (Editor’s note: Please Google “shirt garters” for more info)

MS: Are there any {role/inspiring} models for your characters?

ASATO: Basically, none. However, as mentioned earlier, Shin is partly inspired by Sieg Wahrheit [33] from Chaos Legion, while Lena is partly inspired by General Garrison [34] from Black Hawk Down. In the film, {Garrison} is placed on a situation where he could do nothing but only communicate with his subordinates in adverse circumstances, and this inspired Lena’s position {in the series}. In Black Hawk Down, many characters died before we even understood them, and I think that influenced 86--EIGHTY-SIX as well.

MS: That’s right. They die when the chapters change. When you are writing, you’re writing without knowing who is going to die, isn’t it?

ASATO: There are some characters whose manner of death came to mind as I was writing them. I think they’re good kids, but I have no choice but to let them face their fates (oops).

MS: If the names of the Eighty-Six characters were names of Japanese people, would they still make good names?

ASATO: Yes. All their names can be written in kanji. For example, Shin’s surname, “Nouzen” is from the kanji of the Chinese trumpet creeper (凌霄花) {pronounced as “nouzenkazura”} [35]. I actually like the arrangement of the kanji {from that plant} within the kanji for “surpassing the sky” (霄を凌ぐ) {pronounced as “sora wo shinogu”}. If you use the same kanji and put the honorific (君) {pronounced as “kun”} on it, you can form the characters for the Eurasian goshawk (凌霄君) {pronounced as “ryoshoukun”} [36]. This is also a reference to Shin’s image, as he does resemble a hawk.

What’s next for this series? There’s so much more to write about!

MS: What will happen in Volume 3 of 86--EIGHTY-SIX? [37]

ASATO: It will be properly connected to Volume 1’s Epilogues, so please don’t worry about that. The battle scenes, which were limited in Volume 2, will be much increased here. It might be even tragic.

EDITOR KIYOSE: This paperback series will, of course, continue to be serialized, and the series will also be expanded into various adaptations such as comics [38] and other various media. This work will have a lot of side stories, so we hope you will all appreciate this series as a whole.

MS: Can you please tell us about the future developments of 86--EIGHTY-SIX?

ASATO: The stage has shifted to the Federacy from Volume 2, and as the war situation gets more violent, the environment surrounding the Eighty-Six and the others is about to deteriorate further. There will be new enemies for mankind to face, and their own numerous personal conflicts standing on their way one by one. However, they have survived far difficult circumstances up until now, and since Lena will join them in earnest by Volume 4, I think they will still survive, stubbornly, shamelessly, and boisterously. However, I really wouldn’t know what would happen unless I write them. (LOL)

MS: How many volumes does this series will have?

ASATO: Currently, I'm thinking of around 13 volumes. The war against the Legion has a general flow and an ending in sight already, so I'd like to get to that point first. In addition to that, I’d like to like to write a side story about Raiden and Shin when they just first met, if I have the opportunity [39]. There’s so much more I want to write about. From Volume 4 onward, countries other than the Federacy will be related, and there’s plans to stretch out the stage even more. The Queen's Knights [40], led by Lena, will also make their appearance. I think there might be some slight surprises about Shiden, who first appeared in Volume 2.

MS: Lastly, any message for the readers who have supported you and the series?

ASATO: I was never active on the web at all, and I was totally an unknown newcomer writer. I believe the reason why I and the 86--EIGHTY-SIX series have come this far is due to the readers who picked up the books and supported us. So, everyone, I will do my best to write bringing Shin and Lena and the Eighty-Six’s battle to conclusion, so from this point on, I look forward to your continued support!

{End of Interview}

Translator’s Notes (Most of the blurbs here are taken from respective relevant Wikipedia articles, and the notes also include the Magazine Notes from the actual interview):

[1] Kono Light Novel Ga Sugoi: Kono Light Novel ga Sugoi! (このライトノベルがすごい!, lit. This Light Novel is Amazing!) is an annual light novel guidebook published by Takarajimasha. The guidebook publishes a list of the top ten most popular light novels according to readers polled on the Internet and votes from critics, influencers, and other people related to the light novel industry. 86--EIGHTY-SIX ranked 2nd and 5th in the bunkobon category here in 2018 and 2019.

[2] Lena is the class president of Class 2-E in the 86--EIGHTY-SIX Operation High School spin-off side stories and the manga. This is probably among the first references to said spin-off.

[3] Space Battleship Yamato: one of Japan’s most influential sci-fi/mecha series, a Japanese science fiction anime series produced and written by Yoshinobu Nishizaki, directed by manga artist Leiji Matsumoto, and produced by Academy Productions.

[4] Mobile Suit Gundam: The first series in this very popular Japanese military science fiction media franchise, it was re-released into a film trilogy in 1981.

[5] The Brave Police J-Decker: The fifth installment in the Barve series.

[6] The Brave Express Might Gaine: The fourth installment in the Brave series.

[7] The Brave mecha and sci-fi series: a Japanese toy and anime franchise Brave series made by Takara and Sunrise, and currently owned by Bandai Namco.

[8] Magic Knight Rayearth: a mecha, fantasy and isekai shoujo manga series made by the all-female manga artist group CLAMP.

[9] Kadokawa BEANS Bunko Award: The contest launched by Kadokawa’s female-focused light novel imprint, Kadokawa Beans Bunko.

[10] Dengeki Novel Prize: a literary award handed out annually (since 1994) by the Japanese publisher ASCII Media Works for their Dengeki Bunko light novel imprint, spearheaded by parent company Kadokawa. It is among Japan’s largest light novel contests, with more than 4500 entries submitted annually. 86--EIGHTY-SIX won 1st place in the Rookie Awards category in 2016, launching it to the spotlight.

[11] Dengeki Bunko: a publishing imprint affiliated with Kadokawa’s ASCII Media Works. Many anime adaptations from light novels were published by Dengeki Bunko, including 86--EIGHTY-SIX.

[12] [Magazine Note 1] Final Fantasy Tactics: A tactical simulation RPG released in 1997. The socially conscious storyline, which tackled friction between nations and the gap between the rich and the poor, became very much a hot topic during its time.

Please take note I used the Final Fantasy Tactics: The War of the Lions translation here as contextually I believe this translation has more in line with EIGHTY-SIX than the translation of the actual game Asato played, which is the original Final Fantasy Tactics. Also, Argath vs Algus :3

[13] [Magazine Note 2] BLACK/MATRIX+: A tactical simulation RPG for Sega Saturn, with the PlayStation port released in 1998. It has a unique setting where virtue and vice are said to be reversed.

[14] Final Fantasy: a fantasy anthology media franchise, first and mainly developed as RPGs, owned, published, and distributed by Square Enix. Currently this franchise has 16 main series game releases. One of these games, Final Fantasy VIII, has its main soundtrack (“Eyes on Me” by Faye Wong) featured on the Afterword of 86--EIGHTY-SIX Volume 7: Mist.

[15] Knights of Sidonia: A sci-fi/mecha seinen manga, made by Tsutomu Nihei and ran from 2009-2015 in Kodansha’s Monthly Afternoon magazine. Its anime adaptation, which ran for two seasons, was produced by Polygon Pictures and aired from 2014 to 2015.

[16] Full Metal Panic!: a series of mecha light novels written by Shoji Gatoh and illustrated by Shiki Douji, published by Kadokawa’s Fujimi Fantasia Bunko and ran from 1998-2011. Its anime adaptations were produced by Gonzo, Kyoto Animation and Xebec respectively, from 2003 to 2018.

[17] Gunparade March: A New Song for the March: The anime adaptation for the Playstation video game Gunparade March, produced by J.C. Staff and aired in 2003.

[18] Battle Faery Yukikaze: a Japanese military science fiction novel series written by Chouhei Kambayashi. Its five-episode OVA adaptation ran from 2002-2005.

[19] [Magazine Note 3] Mist: A 2007 film based on the award-winning science fiction horror novella by Stephen King.

[20] [Magazine Note 4] Screamers: A 1995 futuristic science fiction horror film, based on Phillip K. Dick’s novelette “Second Variety”.

[21] [Magazine Note 5] Chaos Legion: A mixed-media action RPG released in 2003, getting a novelization by Tow Ubukata.

[22] [Magazine Note 6] Black Hawk Down: A 2001 war movie. Based on a non-fiction work about an actual urban war between international forces and guerillas that occurred in Somalia. The film depicts how a UH-60 Black Hawk gets taken down and this being dragged into a war situation.

[23] This is a very extensive subject, so please feel free to check out Nazi Germany on Wikipedia to get at least an overview.

[24] Another extensive subject, so feel free to check out 442nd Infantry Regiment on Wikipedia to get an overview.

[25] [Magazine Note 7] Scroll of Agony: The Warsaw Ghetto Diary: A diary kept by a Jewish teacher, {Chaim A. Kaplan}. It described the persecution and pillaging by the Nazis, as well as the three harsh years of {Kaplan’s} life.

Printed in Japan as (ワルシャワ・ゲットー日記―ユダヤ人教師の記録 or “Warsaw Ghetto Diary: A Jewish Teacher’s Record”), with Kaplan implied to have died in 1942 when he was sent to the Treblinka death camp along with other Warsaw Jews.

[26] Another extensive subject, so feel free to check out World War II on Wikipedia to get an overview. Feel free to also check out Gulf War on Wikipedia to get an overview on this topic.

[27] [Magazine Note 8] M551 Sheridan: an American tank developed to be amphibious, airborne tank. Its body was made of aluminum alloy to help reduce weight, but this made it vulnerable to anti-tank weapons and land mines, and it could explode when the shells it’s equipped with are triggered.

[28] X-ATM092: A spider-like robot boss enemy found in Final Fantasy VIII.

[29] Tachikoma: a blue-colored AI walker/roller tank that looks like a spider in the Ghost in the Shell cyberpunk media franchise.

[30] Swallowtail series: The sci-fi novel series written by Chitose Touma and published by Dengeki Bunko in 2008. The series is about artificial fairies, androids created in the form of humans, to be companions to still-living humans after parts of Tokyo’s population were wiped out in a pandemic, and one of these fairies, Ageha, is investigating a serial killer causing destruction. The work also has this multi-legged armored tank called “Tobigumo”. So far as I know this mecha doesn’t have official art, however, a fanart can be found in Pixiv here.

[31] [Magazine Note 9] Garter: They’re suspenders of sorts. “Garter belt” is the term for {a fabric strap which} which is clipped on over-the-knee socks or stockings. Having no shorts above garters is righteous! between the rich and the poor, became very much a hot topic during its time.

Asato’s interest in garter belts is not only shown in the novels, but also in the anime, which is noted to have a lot of thigh shots of Lena wearing said garter belts.

[32] [Magazine Note 10] Pilot suit: In this case, this is the type of suit that sticks really close to the body. As it shows the body lines quite clearly, it’s considered quite fetishistic.

In the current time, 86--EIGHTY-SIX Volume 5: Death, Be Not Proud, has already been published, and Lena did wear the Cicada, which is Asato’s homage to pilot suits.

[33] Sieg Wahrheit: the protagonist of Chaos Legion.

[34] William F. Garrison: a retired major general of the United States Army who commanded United States forces during Operation Gothic Serpent including the Battle of Mogadishu, which served as an inspiration for the novel Black Hawk Down.

[35] The Chinese trumpet creeper, a native flowering vine species found in East Asia, usually in China, can mean “fame”, “honor”, “glory”, “abundant love” and “life filled with flowers” in the flower language.

[36] Eurasian goshawk: a medium-large bird-of-prey found in Europe and Asia and is among the species considered as “true” hawks. The kanji used in the article actually just refers to how Shinei Nouzen looks like a hawk, but upon further examination of said kanji in this reference, it pertained to that goshawk as well.

[37] Volume 3 of 86--EIGHTY-SIX was just about to be released in Japan around the moment this article was published, serving as a promotion of sorts.

[38] Several manga adaptations of 86--EIGHTY-SIX have been published as of current time. For more information, please check out this 86 Reddit Manga FAQ for further details.

[39] Besides Volume 1, Eighty-Six’s Interlude: Headless Knight II, Asato has managed to write this in the side stories Volume 10, Fragmental Neoteny Chapter 8: The Banks of Lethe and Alter.1: Claymore Squadron.

[40] The Queen’s Knights, formally known as the Brísingamen Squadron, was the squadron Lena became the Handler with after the Spearhead Squadron was sent on the Special Reconnaissance Mission. It was led by Shiden Iida and was pivotal in the Republic of San Magnolia’s defense during the 1st Legion Large Scale Offensive.

#86 eighty six #86 #エイティシックス #86 ーエイティシックスー #86 エイティシックス #86 anime #asato asato #dengeki bunko #86 light novel #86--EIGHTY-SIX #eighty six #vladilena milizé #shinei nouzen #安里アサト

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yurious-george · 5 months ago

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4'33'', by John Cage, is commonly remembered as 4 and a half minutes of silence. But contrary to popular belief, the song is not actually meant to be the sound of silence, but the sound of quiet. Ambient noises contribute to - and consist of - the performance. True silence does not exist. If one tilts their head right, the whole world sings. and, with that said, a playlist.

yeah, this one's a doozy. hi, cubewatermelon and co. miss me?

rhetorical question. don't answer that.

A few nitty-gritty things out of the way, first. this is specifically intended for the 2018 mod team for the sleepless domain fans discord server, primarily cubewatermelon/mary cagle. Folks who knew me are welcome to look on, but I'm not going to do much to catch people up to speed. hi, everyone! hope you're well!

I also might be a bit disjointed or biased in my recollection. For reasons that will be made clear extremely soon, I can't put my childhood on a linear timeline. I can only express myself, and hope I don't mess it up horribly this time.

Noooowww to the big stuff. re: stalking; i genuinely didn't mean to stalk anyone, and when they told me to back off, i backed off. I am not willing to discuss this further. not being able to conceptualize other people's emotions or the consequences of my actions has caused some problems for me

that's an autism thing btw. im autistic i dont think i told anyone that

And now, the special guest you've all been waiting for: a big round of applause for the elephant in the room! In accordance with the WMA Declaration of Tokyo, the deliberate overprescription of psychotropic medication is a form of pharmacological torture. Most victims of pharmacological torture and experimentation are children, because it is nigh-impossible to sue for brain damage when there is no fully-formed adult brain for comparison prior to the abuse.

Torture is a strong word, but I don't have another word to use. psychiatric abuse usually describes mistreatment in psychiatric wards; pharmacological abuse describes a patient who takes advantage of a prescription; medical abuse is when a doctor (usually physically) abuses their patient. Being able to understand what happened to you is a form of agency, and I don't even have the words. I identify as a torture victim; this may change.

This high dose was precedented and legal, but the vaginal stretching of intersex infants is also legal. much involuntary psychiatric & psychotropic treatment (such as restraints and solitary confinement) are legal, and child marriage is legal. abuse is not abnormal: it is profoundly normal. Because something is normal, legal, and precedented does not prevent it from being torture.

and when your mother hands you a poison apple and says "here, eat this; it will be good for you; i hope someday you'll forgive me" you have to eat it, because you are eight years old and you don't get to argue with your mother. despite all this, I don't blame my aunt for refilling the high dose. when I said the dose was hurting me, she listened. (thank you, auntie. i wouldn't have gotten out without you.)

And this brings us to you. oh, you four. (five? i forget myself!)

I'd like to establish some context. I was used to things getting taken from me. friend groups in particular: I didn't expect to keep any friends, because I constantly expected to have to pack up and move on. I moved a lot in my childhood, and in Africa, i was constantly told that at some undetermined point in the near future, i'd have to go back to the states. living with my aunt was a temporary thing, i was expected to eventually move back in with my parents at some undetermined point in the future. I relied heavily on online friends because they were people I could have anywhere, so online communities were my only lifeline - not to mention, i was basically in solitary confinement while in Kenya.

Most of all, I was terrified of my mental health/actions being exposed, examined, found lacking, and ultimately excluded. (this is why i was so afraid of psychiatric wards.) When you decided something had to be done about me - cutting me off from the server so i had to speak with you - It was either comply with your demands to communicate (which I could not, and did not understand why) or lose the community. I was so, so afraid of you i wanted to die when you all confronted me, and of course i couldn't say that, because only manipulative people would say "your attempt to solve this problem makes me want to seriously hurt myself."

But then I got called manipulative anyway <3 yay <3

Seriously: I wasn't trying to manipulate anyone, and i have no idea how you can manipulate someone without intention. (ah, that felt good to say!) Between medication spellbinding, alexithymia, and prior abuse, all my thoughts were so disordered i genuinely couldn't explain myself most of the time. Looking back, I have no childhood memory where I was fully lucid. I leaned into a manic persona because it was the only way I had any agency at all. I was something beyond both reason and self-recognition, and I willingly tried to brute-force my way through an extreme trauma response to please you. And you still hit me with my worst nightmare. that's why i was mad at you lol

I was so, so afraid, all the time, and I didn't even have the tools to understand I was afraid. How could someone as confident and impulsive as me be so fearful all the time? Was that manic persona freedom? Or was it a longer leash?

(Forgive my impulse toward rhetoric. I shouldn't ask questions you can't answer.)

I also couldn't say how badly i was hurting, because that would be venting, but you also accused me of venting when I was just talking about my day? or what was on my mind? I didn't understand that very well. autism moment, don't bother explaining it now. I also couldn't burden people with my actual mental health problems, because making strangers deal with that would be toxic! I resent you for setting up a system where it seemed safest not to speak and then punishing me for my inability to communicate. I resent every system that set me up for failure and punished me for failing, including yours.

And yet - I know that was not your intent! I can see in retrospect how hard you tried to be kind using the tools you had. The people with power over me, who genuinely did not want to do me harm and gave me multiple second chances, still upheld and facilitated the systems that tortured me; a miniature parody of the psychiatric system. (talk therapy and communication are useless if you struggle with self-awareness.) The same is true for the source: No person in my psychiatric treatment wanted me to suffer, and yet, here I am: a torture victim without a torturer. (except my parents, sort of.)

The logical conclusion, then: the system only intends to heal those who are already compliant, or prioritize compliance. The rest of us are treated to induce compliance, and if we still cannot, we are sequestered away. My medicine made me sick, and my prescribers made money off of keeping me sick - off of my torture. This is not a conspiracy: it is my lived experience.

However, even if i could communicate perfectly, we still would have had massive communication issues. Like - you know that one page where ben and steffi talk about dating, and ben says he thought steffi was gay? and steffi gets super defensive and it escalates into a screaming fight? I found that offensive, because a character getting that offput by the concept of not liking men (or a man) is kind of lesbophobic! But I understood that it would be a pain to redraw/write the page so they they fight about something else, don't fight, or some other solution, so i didn't need it to be fixed - just wanted to point out that was a reasonable interpretation, and one to be aware of in the future. but somehow my concerns got interpreted as a phrasing issue…? like, Ms. Cagle rewrote the page to say "weren't into guys" instead of "gay"..? You were very polite about it, Ms! But I found this interaction so baffling I didn't even try to correct it. that… wasn't what i said…

frankly we should bring back mildly homophobic steffi. twas narratively appropriate (<- different essay for a different time)

but yeah the whole communication operation was doomed from the start. rip!

The issue was always my inability to communicate, but my meds made it nigh-impossible to understand what I was feeling, and when I did, expressing myself could get me institutionalized. My suffering was inevitable but always, somehow, my fault. Awesome! *disintegrates into a pile of sand*

I cannot deny I was a girl like a box of matches waiting to be struck. You had no choice but to do as you did. But is it really what you ought to have done? (On this, I have no answer. I hope you have one that satisfies you.)

(that was genuine, by the by. i've spent a lot of time pondering this mess, and I still haven't found the "right" answer. I don't think there is one - though action or inaction, there is no version of this story where I don't suffer. I can only hope it was worth it. wait, hold on *adds the omelas child to my Kin List*)

Nor can I deny making my previous open letter in a small attempt to 'get back' at you - i'm not above that. lord knows i'm not innocent. but i really was trying to channel that rage into something productive. unfortunately i was doomed to fail because i didn't know what i meant. if you showed me that letter now, you'd hear a lot of "what? I don't know why I said that" "i have no idea why i would complain about something so minor" etc. You can disregard all that. This is what I was trying to say. the obsession, the trauma, the projection: all of it. So much of my obsession was talking around an issue i couldn't identify.

(meguka image) I know now

I knew I would be traumatized by this whole situation. I saw it coming and i could do nothing to stop it. But Gear was crucial to deciphering all this - in fact, suddenly thinking about her last year prompted me to really dissect my medical situation and realize i was tortured. I couldn't have done it without her. cassie & maggie, against the world.

Gear scans surprisingly well as a victim of long-term torture, actually. I don't think you meant to do that but good job!

speaking of her - i still don't think she's consistently suicidal. she's a real cockroach of a character, and I love her for it! But sometimes, i want to die and i want to live mean the same thing, because they both mean i need to get out of here. Imo, her thought processes and desires frequently contradict themselves, like mine did. and making your favs kill themselves in increasingly gruesome ways is really fun catharsis!

But please don't take this to mean I consider myself - or Gear - blameless. I love her because she's not blameless, because she's cruel for fun, because she'd rather be wicked than helpless. Like knows like. What I mean to say is, as of 2018, there is a black space between little Margret and Gear, and I saw all the signs of something very, very bad happening in that space. I know because I shared that space. what I mean to say is, teenage girls don't go out of their minds over nothing. Everything I made here is just an expression of what I heard in the narrative's silences.

and thus my biggest apprehension around revisiting the comic. knowing the author and I have such fundamentally different experiences with mental health - what if the signs of torture i picked up on weren't intended, or i completely made them up? what if, in the parts i haven't read yet, there's information that uproots my entire interpretation, or berates her for refusing mental health services that hurt me profoundly? how do you reconcile that a character so crucial to deciphering yourself may not be anything like you at all? I Don't Know. Shitpost, probably

You're welcome to share those shitposts and whatnot by the way. Creating this let me put down years of hurt, and i hope it relieves you, too. I don't need to go back on the server, or forgiveness, or anything besides understanding. consider this a peace offering. the terms are yours.

Despite writing nearly 10k words, I still probably missed something or was callous or whatever. Self-expression and self-understanding are… new to me. My apology may be understated, but please take it as I meant it, with utmost sincerity. My askbox is open, and I'm more than happy to discuss antipsych resources, KB, What The Hell Is Wrong With Gear, artistic choices made in this comic, etc. I'm even down to reconnect on discord! Maybe. Uh, I'm conflicted. I reserve my right to not want to talk, be slow in responding, and so on, as should you. we've no obligations and all the time in the world. Let neither of us hurt ourselves in meeting because it's the "right" thing to do. I'm not blaming anyone or trying to start drama. If it would give you the most peace of mind to completely ignore this, please do so.

or, translated: as of right now, I'm not ready for any information about KB after steffi reunites with her dad, or difficult emotional reunions. I would really like to hear from everyone, and I'd appreciate casual well-wishes. I don't want things to be the same, I want them to be peaceful. Baby steps, cassie, baby steps. (very large and fearful prey animal tries not to run into oncoming traffic)

mostly, making this was for me. Perhaps I've said too much, but after spending so long unable to express myself freely, my art was cathartic and necessary. I'm no one's martyr or innocent, I'm just a torture victim trying to make sense of it all. I want to articulate some thoughts I couldn't figure out how to say before and make some silly things that make people laugh. Most of all, I'm happy in ways I never thought I could be, and I would like to share that joy with old acquaintances and other fans of a story I adored.

What I mean to say is: The train's about to leave the station, and there's an empty seat beside me. The train will still leave whether or not you board; but I would be honored not to go it alone!

Thank you to everyone who stuck by me even after the drama. Ethel, Felipe, Chris - even though we've fallen out of contact, your kindness and patience meant more than i can say. special thank you to @stars-in-a-jam-jar, the first person i confessed everything to after the smoke cleared, and someone i consider myself close with no matter how long we fall out of contact. My close online friends, @shafpanda, @theoandmoon, @dvanaestmrva, my honorary cousin @my-name-is-jimmy, and everyone else I confided in about my torture. and, of course, my partners @transloo and @teenyjellyfishy, and my little sibling, @aroacenezhaanddainsleif, the three people I love most in the world. Thank you, all. it is an honor to love you, and be loved by you.

#kiwi blitz #there's a lot more we could discuss. this barely scratched the surface #i didn't even MENTION barry and he's so important!#for now I'll just say: pain obfuscates everything outside of yourself #i still can't really conceptualize how yall feel about my actions other than 'probably bad?'#so i decided it was in the best taste to simply speak for myself #rather than put words in your mouth #i hope that's the right choice #it's funny. i thought i'd be angrier.#now there's just hope where my rage should be. how'd that happen?#torture tw #child torture tw #gore tw #medical abuse tw #psychiatric abuse tw #suicide tw #death tw #blood tw #abuse tw #parental abuse tw #child abuse tw #suicidal ideation tw #uhhh there's more probably. quite the laundry list here #also! you would express romantic attraction really strangely too #(as a severely undersocialized & completely manic lesbian teenager)#if you knew what happened to david kato.#not saying i was right obv. just saying.#ok back to never speaking of that again #this is cassandra

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