#food ment hsks

[gonfrees]

sometimes I miss who I used to be. I used to be a cool, wild person who would do anything you dared them to do. I would eat maybe once a day with no consequence for my energy levels. I'd smoke cigarettes every day and stay up late and wake up early and I would create. I would take risks, I'd do things for fun instead of taking care of myself. I was carefree and I mourn for all those cooler, more fun parts of me.

now I eat consistently. I try to take vitamins. I drink plenty of water in a day. If I don't get enough sleep or drink too much I'm starting to feel it. I haven't smoked in a year and a half (cigs, I still do weed). I'm not as spontaneous and I like to be at home a lot. Let myself be known and have a wonderful partner for the last 3 years. While I love and miss who I used to be and all the things I can do, I'm proud that I've started some healthier habits. I still have issues and need better habits but looking back I can say I've grown. I've gained weight which sometimes bothers me but I can look in the mirror and say that is a healthy body. She eats bad foods sometimes but she also tries to get her nutrients. Maybe one day I'll feel grown up. Loving yourself is hard and I think it's easy to romanticise who I used to be. Cool and didn't need anyone, but had a lot of friends I wasn't tryely open with. Growing up is weird, 25 is a weird age.