#folk and that this shouldn't be tripping me up so much but it's just like.

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

Human pet guy showed up on my dash again (via puppy play sick skateboard tricks post) and I decided to look at what he was up to these days, and

what do you mean he was born in 1995?

[antiquitea]

I AM THREE DAYS OUT FROM THESE PHOTOS BEING TAKEN AND I STILL CAN'T QUITE BELIEVE THIS NIGHT HAPPENED.

(please do not repost my photos)

so!! i had the pleasure of seeing atta boy in toronto on october 22 and it was amazing in every conceivable way. they opened for richy mitch & the coal miners.

as i was waiting outside, i was mostly texting mr. megan; his work day had just ended so he was catching me up. i was first in the outside line (the venue is also a bar so there was a small inside line as well), so i was a couple of feet away from the security guard. i saw this guy walk up to them in the peripheral of my vision, but didn't think anything of it. just someone asking if it was the line for the gig or saying that they just wanted to get a beer.

the blue carhartt pants should've given it away.

i was so close to lewis that i could've reached out and touched him. and i definitely stood there for a moment just like 😲 as i watched him go inside the bar. he was wearing a blue cap, a red shirt, and of course those blue carhartt pants.

when i got into the horseshoe tavern i did the usual wandering i do at a gig. grabbed a beer, scoped out the stage, and checked out the merch table. atta boy merch wasn't being sold yet, so i was just having my beer and walking around.

and then ... i saw lewis sitting at the back of the venue in a booth by himself, having a beer and on his phone (like texting or something). there was a part of me that said "megan, don't bother him. he goes on in an hour and probably just wants to chill." but another part of me thought "if he doesn't want to be bothered or if the vibes are off you can just fuck off. no big. no hard feelings."

well!

i wandered over, and was midway through saying, "excuse me, lewis? could i bother you for a moment?" and he was already looking up at me and gesturing to the chair next to him. "yes, of course you can bother me!" he said.

(some paraphrasing is ultimately imminent)

i sat down next to him and said something along the lines of how i really loved and appreciated all of his art - his acting, his music - and thanked him so much for sharing that with us. i told him that i wasn't going to get into the details, but that the last year was really shitty for me and that his art helped me a lot, and brought me a lot of comfort. his face lit up and he said, "oh my god, that's so sweet. that's so kind. that's why i do this! thank you!"

then he asked me my name, and proceeded to keep saying it throughout our conversation (at one point i said "okay, you need to stop saying my name so much because you're giving me butterflies" and he laughed). he then asked if i "lived around here" and i told him that no, i lived in halifax.

"halifax? that's far!"

i told him that yes it was 😂 but that i really wanted to see his band, so i'd flown in earlier in the day, and that it was totally worth the trip! "it means so so much to me that you would travel all that way to come see us! really, that's so sweet! thank you!"

i asked if he would be cool taking a couple of selfies and he was already taking his cap off, and he said that it was absolutely cool! he mentioned that it was kinda dark so we might have to use flash. i told him that flash and i weren't great friends (i blink a lot and get pretty shiny), and he laughed. we got a couple of really good photos! (the first one up above).

i told him about my bestie @wildbornsiren, who wanted to be there so badly and couldn't make it, and asked if he would be cool saying hi to her? lewis said he was down with that, and we recorded a sweet little video for her where he said hi to her.

lewis then said to me, "you know, when i think of halifax i think of stan rogers." rogers was a popular folk artist from the area, and while he's a big name, i was kinda surprised that lewis knew who he was! not to flex, but based on his spotify playlists we have similar tastes in music so i shouldn't have been that shocked.

i said that i "fuckin' love stan rogers!" and we talked about him and his music for a little bit. after gushing over our mutual love of stan rogers, i said, "if you like stan rogers and his type of music, you should really check out joel plaskett. he's from the area too, plays music in a similar style as stan, super prolific - highly recommend!"

i had to spell joel's last name a couple of times for him (the bar was kinda loud), but he may or may not be a joel plaskett fan now, who's to say!

i thanked him again for taking the time to chat with me, and he shook my hand and said, "hey, if the selfies didn't turn out come find me after the show and we can take some more." to which i replied, "i will!"

then lewis added, "i really hope i can see you after the show!"

we parted ways, and i found my place in front of the stage, a little off to the side. the place was packed! i'd actually never heard of richy mitch & the coal miners until atta boy announced that they were touring with them, and i had no idea they were kind of a big name because the place was filling up fast!

atta boy's set was amazing! of course i wish it had been longer, but they played a bunch of my faves so i was absolutely thrilled by that. poor eden was just getting over a cold, so her voice was a little strained at times, but she still did fantastic! the rest of the crowd was absolutely in love with them. if they weren't fans before the gig, i'm pretty sure they left as such.

(i posted some photos of lewis specifically here)

after their set i went to the merch table that dashel was working and bought a hoodie. we chatted for a little bit, i told them that the set was fantastic and thanked them so much. they thanked me for coming and said that they hoped i had a great rest of my night. 😊

during richy mitch & the coal miners' set, i went up to the bar to get another drink, only to see the bartender already heineken for me haha! it's so nice to be seen. lewis was also at the bar, but like three or four people away from me. but he glanced over, saw me, came over, and said "hey megan!"

i am dying from glee. "hey lewis!"

he propped his arm against the bar and leaned against it, and asked, with this big fuckin' grin on his face, "what did you think of the set? was it worth coming out to toronto for?"

i am flabbergasted that a) this was happening, and b) that he genuinely seemed interested. i said, "oh my god it was so good. i enjoyed it so much. it was such an honour to see y'all live."

he told me that i was so sweet, and then asked, "how did the selfies turn out?"

i replied, "pretty good! i have t-rex kinda arms, so sometimes it's difficult for me to get people who are taller than me in frame. but they're great!"

lewis laughed and then looked at his own arms. "i have t-rex arms too."

i laughed and said, "oh, no you don't!" NOT EVEN THINKING i reached out and touched his arm. MEGAN. DO NOT FLIRT WITH LEWIS PULLMAN. YOU ARE IN DANGER, GIRL.

he was laughing and said, "well, i'll take them!" he grabbed my phone, and asked "do we want flash or do we not want flash?"

"no flash. it's kind of my enemy because i get really shiny."

he took a couple of pictures and there was flash, and was like "wait ... we didn't want flash." so together, while he was holding my phone, we were pressing my screen together trying to figure out how to turn it off. our hands kept touching and i was... really trying not to spontaneously combust.

(hiding my face in this one because i'm not a fan of it, but his is darling)

after he handed my phone back to me, he said, "let's see how they turned out!"

i was scrolling through them and he leaned over and said, "oh these are really good!" i landed on the one above and he chuckled and said, "i really like that one!"

i don't like my face in it, but i'm laughing and clearly so so happy, and said, "you know what? i like that one too."

i asked if he would mind signing something for me, and he said that he didn't mind at all, that he'd love to sign something for me. he was putting his ballcap on (because he's such a gentleman who took his hat off for our pictures), and it was a little askew when he asked "do you have a pen?"

gonna need this dude to stop being so darling.

i did, and pulled out some bar napkins i'd stuffed in my purse earlier and asked if this was good. lewis laughed a little and nodded saying that a napkin was great.

i was just expecting a signature, so as he's writing this little novella above it, i'm like "oh my god, you don't have to do this." and he kinda giggled like it was some kind of big secret. "what are you writing, you sweet man?" i asked, and he giggled again!!

lewis handed me the bar napkin and i gave it a quick read and said, "thank you so much. this is so sweet!"

he leaned against the bar again for a moment and said, "it so means the world to me that you travelled all that way to come see us, and that you had a good time."

and then, before i'm truly aware of what's happening, he leaned in (and crouched because i'm a full foot shorter than he is), and wrapped his arms around me, and pulled me so close to him and squeezed, rubbed my back. and again thanked me so much for coming out, meant the world, made his night.

y'all. getting a hug from lewis pullman may have cured my depression. like it was an actual hug.

i, on the verge of flying into space from joy, thanked him again for everything that night, and he said, "you are so welcome! i hope i can see you again!"

LEWIS WHAT ARE WE.

i, very drunk on elation and a little drunk on beer, blew him a kiss, and he smiled and put his hands over his heart. i floated away back into the crowd, and tried to not just scream with happiness.

and that, my friends, is how lewis pullman damn near killed me.

[obsessivestar]

'What If It's All A RomCom?' - A Ted Nivison X Reader

{{-Ooooh we gettin' juicy in Chapter 5 folks, next one might be a lil' spicy ;^))). If you wanna catch up on how we got here, I'd recommend starting at Chapter 1 and go from there! All old *AND* new Chapters will always be linked at the very bottom ♡ Thanks so much for bein' here and enjoy! :^) -}}

//General Warnings: 18+ fic, Reader implied to be afab and under 5'5.

Chapter Warnings: Heavy language, implied sexual thoughts ig

Word count: 4.6k\\

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@k-k0129 & @callsign-scully

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Chapter 5: You're Going To Be Trouble.

The rest of that day on set was spent filming a few more scenes with the extras. I found it a little strange at this point that we had filmed almost nothing with some of the main characters. Turns out, some of the extras could only be up here for the first week, so Tanner was getting all of the filming done with them first. It was fine by me, I needed a little break after that first kiss anyway.

God, that first kiss.

We did too much, I know we did, but...I can't say I regret it. Not at all. Ted was a better kisser than I was expecting. Suddenly, I find myself wanting to be one of 'the homies' he claims to smooch up so much. Truthfully, I know I shouldn't be feeling this way. Joseph seems to be cool with the idea of Ted and I fooling around now, but maybe he wasn't wrong before. I couldn't relax for the kissing scene until we were alone, and then I practically jumped on him. Tanner admitted it wasn't what he was expecting, but he liked it anyhow. Still, these feelings are starting to affect my job. What even are these feelings?

They could just be coming from the film, right? What if this isn't real? Or even worse, what if it IS real? Ted seemed to be struggling just as much with that kiss, not to mention all that flirting. Does he feel this tension as harshly as I do? What if we do find some twisted way to sleep together? What happens when it's a wrap on the whole film?

What if we have to part ways?

What if I don't want to?

I lay awake at night, staring up at the ceiling like I had done yesterday, once again thinking about Ted. All of these thoughts are racing through my mind, and I can't properly grasp any of them. When I close my eyes, I just see Ted kissing me. I feel his hands around my waist, I feel his stubble against my fingertips, his lips refusing to part from mine, his implied desire to go further, 'be louder'. I take a deep breath, breathing out through my mouth to calm myself. Even if all I do is kiss the guy for the next 2 and a half weeks, I'll be thinking about it every night. I know I will.

I wake the next morning to the sound of a lot of people moving around downstairs. Many members of the film crew were searching the entire living room. Some had lifted up the sofa, some were looking around the kitchen, moving cameras, practically pulling the place apart. I could see Tanner, Joseph, and Dan were helping out, Joe especially. He seemed upset.

"Is there a fucking bomb somewhere in the house?" I asked with a chuckle, coming down the stairs to walk to Joe. "What's happened?"

"Your clothes are gone." Joe admits with a frown, rummaging through some of the kitchen cupboards. He must've been desperate if he was looking through the kitchen for clothes.

"Uh...no they're not?" I furrow my brows in confusing, gesturing upstairs. "They're...in my room, I just changed."

"No no no no, the ones I brought. Your film wardrobe. They're just--they're just gone." Joe groans, closing some of the kitchen cabinets. Uh oh. That's over half of my clothes for this trip. My personal suitcase was way smaller than the one Joe had brought and had barely a week's worth of clothes in it. We had spent days getting all of those other outfits together for 'Kara', and I was supposed to take it all home when the film wrapped. Everything I was going to wear for the next 2 and a half weeks were gone.

"Alright, we've checked...literally everywhere. I even went outside.." Ted approached Joe and I, wearing a baby blue t-shirt and some brown slacks kept up by a nice black belt. I believe this fit was one of his own. I could tell. Ted had a nice sense of style. "I didn't leave it outside." Joe huffs, crossing his arms as he leans back against the kitchen counter. "It was down here by the kitchen, away from the camera's, in a bag."

"...It was in a bag?" Tanner asks from across the room, stretching his neck out a bit so he could see us. "Yeah, the suitcase I had it in fucking broke when I brought it upstairs last night, so I had to put it all in a bag until our hangers came in." Joe explained, running his fingers through his hair. "I couldn't drag it up the stairs by myself so I left it in here."

Tanner frowned, coming over to join the 3 of us in the kitchen. "What kind of bag?" Tanner asked with a nervous smile, gesturing his hands out in front of Joe.

"I had to throw them in--" I see realization hit Joe like a ton of bricks, his expression changing from frustration to near anguish. "I'm a fucking idiot."

"What?" Tanner frowns again. "You're not an idiot."

"I'm an absolute fucking idiot."

"Why?"

"Tanner?"

"Yeah?

"Did the garbage get taken out today?"

"Yeah."

"The garbage was her clothes."

"...OH..."

Joe places both of his hands over his face and moves his finger up into his hair to pull at it with another groan, a frustrated smile and a chuckle leaving him. I honestly felt pretty guilty, even if I had nothing to do with this. Maybe if I hadn't been the first to turn in for the night, I would've been able to offer to put the bag in my room.

"How many outfits we talkin'?" Ted asks, placing his hands on his shoulders. "Like...10? I think?" Joe answers, shaking his head and swallowing thickly, making an audible 'gulp' noise. "I don't know man--I'm just--I'm overwhelmed. I'm fucking sorry."

"No no, it's okay, we can fix this.." Ted speaks to Joe in a comforting tone, holding his hands out with his palms pointed to the ground. "We're literally 5 minutes away from the city, we can get new clothes, right?" Ted asks, turning his wrists in a little shrug.

"I'm not letting either of you front any of those costs." Joe replied, shaking his head. "Oh, they don't have to." Tanner chimes in, looking at Joe. "I got an emergency credit card literally for when something like this was gonna happen."

"Emergency credit card?" I repeated, furrowing my brows again.

"Yeah, it's got a little under a thousand in it right now." Tanner explained, reaching into his back pocket to pull out his worn leather wallet. "I signed up for it a couple weeks ago just in case we needed it. My instructor recommended it."

Joe and I look at each other and I smile at him. I see a sense of relief wash over his body, but he's still a little reluctant. "Tanner, I--I don't want to spend a thousand of your money because of my fuck up."

"See, that's the best part: It's technically not my money. It's the school's." Tanner smiled, pointing at Joe. "As long as it's related to this film and I can prove it was an emergency, they cover it."

Joe gives a humorous smirk and shrugs. "OK that's different, I'm OK spending your school's money." He chuckles, getting a laugh from Tanner.

After informing everyone to stop the search, the 4 of us have a talk and agree to split up for the day. Tanner and Joe will stay here and take the time to get some of the last solo shots with the extras done and over with, and Ted and I will head out in his Tacoma once again to go outfit shopping. In reality, Joe could've been the one to go with me, but he lied about wanting to watch Tanner be a director. I know he was lying because he winked at me as Ted was busy putting a long sleeved brown shirt on. It was meant to be a little chilly today anyways.

As soon as we stepped out, it was just Ted and I once again.

After pulling out of the driveway, we're once again on the road to head into the city. It's a Friday, so the roads are a bit more packed than usual. At one point we even ran into some traffic, which caused Ted and I to start an out of the blue conversation detailing interesting facts about each other. I had told him a few interesting things about myself, but boy did I feel boring compared to him. He told me all about some of the things he had done for YouTube content, like his trips to the Rainforest Café and Margaritaville with Eddy, his 400mg Nerd Rope incident, when he watched all the barbie movies, all of It. Anything I said, he'd immediately upstage me. But the one thing; the one thing that surprised me about him the most was...

"Your whole name is Theodore?"

I turn my head to look at Ted as he kept his eyes on the road, or more like on the still SUV at the red light in front of us. "Theodore Nivison.."

"Junior, too. I'm the sequel." Ted grins, glancing at me for a moment. "I almost introduced myself to you as 'Theo', actually, but I figured Tanner had already told you about me."

"Oh yeah, that would've made you sound even more like a prick."

"Well, see, I had this idea that I needed to be charming, but now I see you're a fucking wench, so.."

"Wench!?" I start laughing, tilting my head back. This mother fucker. He does not need to be this funny. He can't be handsome and funny. It isn't fair. "You're a fucking tool, Theodore"

"Oh I hate hearing my full name in your voice." Ted cringes playfully. "Don't do that."

"I'm gonna start calling you Theodore now."

"Please, don't. I'll take 'Theo' and 'Teddy', those are fine."

"I thought you didn't like Teddy?" I make my voice sound a little higher and lean my arm against the storage compartment between us, batting my eyelashes at Ted. He turns his head to look at me and say something, but he pauses. Our faces are close again and I think I see him blush for a moment, but he rolls his eyes and turns his head away to look out the front window again. "I don't mind it from you."

"Awe, Theodore! You do care!"

I'm giggling to myself in the passenger seat as the light turns green, adjusting myself so I'm fully seated. Ted gives me playful smacks on the arm before he starts driving again, pestering me to be quiet as he drives. I'm lightly whacking at his hand whenever he tries to pester me, giggling like an absolute fool. I just love messing with him. I absolutely love messing with him.

We drove around for a little bit, trying to decide where to go to get these clothes. We didn't want to spend hours and hours going from store to store and we certainly didn't intend to max out Tanner's card, even if it wasn't his money. Ted mentioned that he usually just goes to Old Navy, so we settled on there. The closest Old Navy was in a strip mall, so we had to find a parking spot and walk around inside for a little bit just to get to it. A lot of the smaller stores we passed by were either completely empty or closed down entirely, yet there were a lot of people walking around just for the food court. Valid.

"You wanna get lunch after?" I ask Ted, glancing up at him as we walk. He's so tall. "You askin' me out?" He remarks with a smirk. "I'm asking if you're hungry. I'm hungry."

"...Yeah, I could eat, but not here." Ted agreed with a little shrug, slipping his hands in his pockets. "I'll take us somewhere better later."

"Not the Rainforest."

"...Alright, but you're no fun."

We spend the entire late morning and half of the afternoon together in that mall. The entire time we're joking with each other and laughing together. It felt like it did on the very first day when we had to get breakfast: little to no tension, just good vibes and even better chemistry. As much as I enjoyed getting weak in the loins by his charming looks and deep voice, I also enjoyed just casually getting along with him. I enjoyed having this friendship

This friendship has A LOT of sexual tension in it, but still, I like being his friend.

I had tried on a TON of clothes at that Old Navy. Turns out, not a bad place to shop. They had some sort of flash sale going on, so we got a lot more than just 10 simple outfits. Even Ted had decided to buy a new shirt, letting me help him decide between a few before we'd pay for our stuff and leave. We took a lot of photos, too. At one point, Ted had completely underestimated if whether or not a shirt would fit me. I came out of the dressing room with it about half on. It barely covered my bra and completely showed my midrift. There was no way I was able to pull it down, I looked like an overgrown toddler. I looked ridiculous, but man, were we laughing about it. At another point, we accidentally took the long way back around to the entrance we came in from, so we passed by a fairly busy Victoria's Secret. Ted sneakily moved over to a full set of pink lingerie and held it up to his body, gesturing over at me with a humorous smirk.

"You're not buying that for me." I snicker, crossing my arms at me. "It's for me, bitch!" Ted remarks with a cringey, feminine lisp, hooking the lingerie back up where it belonged to scurry back to me before being seen. I laughed hard enough for my voice to start echoing across the mall. Everything he did today was making me laugh. Even when we were leaving the mall and I realized Sweet Escape was playing, Ted was making me laugh with his...unique idea of dancing. Maybe he liked making me laugh, I don't know. I wasn't complaining.

We get back to Ted's tacoma just before it starts raining. Ted has to rush to throw all of the new clothes in the backseat before he can get in, some of the rainwater weighing down his tall hair a little as he sits down in the driver's seat and closes his door with a huff.

"Look at us, getting caught in the rain." I grin at Ted, watching as he ran his fingers through his now damp hair. "Yeah, super romantic, I'm sure.". Ted playfully scoffed, starting up his truck to pull out of the mall parking lot. He'd drive a little slower once the rain would pick up, keeping his eyes on the road. This particular drive was quiet, but that changed once we parked by the restaurant we were planning to get lunch at.

"No way am I walking in that.." Ted speaks, taking his seatbelt off so he can relax back against his seat. "I don't think it'll last much longer." I reply, taking my seatbelt off as well. "It's probably just a passing storm. We can just kill time.." I lean forward to look up through the front window, trying to see how dark the clouds above us are.

"That works, got a question for you anyway." Ted spoke, shifting his body a little so he could face me more comfortably. I gesture at him to let him ask his question, checking my phone's weather app to see how long the storm was estimated to last.

"Why couldn't you kiss me yesterday?"

I stop scrolling through the weather app to look at Ted, raising a brow at him with a smirk. "From what I can remember, I had no problems kissing you yesterday.."

"Yeah, once we were alone." Ted smirks at me, tilting his head a little when I didn't give an immediate answer. I stare back at him for a moment before adjusting in my seat to face him more, leaning a bit against the storage space between us once again. "You couldn't kiss me either." I smirk back at him, squinting a little as if to examine him. "You're the one that said you could kiss the--"

"Yeah I know what I said, 'pretty lady' I know. I know." Ted interrupted me, holding his hand up in between us. "I'm asking you, I have my own reasons."

"And what reasons are there?"

"I'm asking you, princess. Don't dodge around it."

"No no no, now you've got me curious."

"I don't fucking care what I've got you, I'm not telling you shit until--"

"You're the one that was supposed to give the tell, Ted."

Ted and I lock eyes once again, my smirk turning into a knowing smile. It's true. All of those nerves? Ted technically started it. At first, Ted was too nervous to give the tell on camera so Tanner wanted us to do a practice kiss. That's where I was personally messing up.

"Why couldn't you kiss me, Theo~?"

Without even realizing, my eyes linger down to his quaint blush toned lips, quickly darting my eyes back up to meet his once more. Did he notice? I hope to god he didn't notice. I had been thinking about that first kiss for nearly an hour last night, but being alone with Ted makes me think about it again. My stomach feels fluttery just looking into his eyes. I have to hold back the urge to giggle anytime he smiles at me. Part of me even wants to kiss him right now.

Ted's silent smirk turns into a charming smile, raising his chin a little.

"...I don't think it needs to be said at this rate, does it?" Ted finally responds, his eyes seemingly searching my face. That certainly isn't going to help the butterflies in my stomach, but it's the closest thing I'm probably going to get to a clear answer about Ted's feelings, at least for now.

"Well...I guess we're both disappointments, then." I say, resting my chin on my hand.

"Guess so.." Ted shrugs lightly, keeping his gaze on mine. I glance at his neck before looking at his face again.

"You're going to be trouble for me, aren't you?" I ask in a gentle voice.

"I kinda hope so, yeah." He grins back at me, lowering his chin to fully meet my gaze. "That's what I'm goin' for."

The sun's harsh rays slowly move over to practically light up the inside of the truck, revealing that the storm had finally passed. I wonder what would've happened if that storm had lasted just a little bit longer. I probably would've kissed him. God, I wanted to kiss him.

Ted and I finally exit his Tacoma to go inside and grab some lunch, deciding to dine-in despite knowing we had been out longer than anticipated. I brought this up to Ted, but he assured me Tanner wouldn't care. I'm starting to think Tanner and Joe are trying to set us up. Even as Ted and I sit at our booth and continue to talk casually about ourselves, I get a sense that Ted and I have a timer between us. I don't know what it's counting down to, but either this tension is going to just fizzle out as harmless flirting and we go our separate ways, or it's going to explode in our faces. Yesterday's kiss makes me feel like it's going to be the ladder.

I had a big storm of my own on it's way.

After lunch, Ted and I returned to set with everything we had bought, plus some leftovers for Tanner. Joe and I spent the rest of the evening getting all of the outfits together, making sure to keep them all hung up in my room this time. Next thing I know, the day is over and I'm once again in my room, just looking over social media on my phone. I'm wearing a flowy nightgown to bed tonight with only pajama shorts on underneath, but I'm comfortable, even though it's late. I probably should've put my phone down an hour ago, but it was hard to fall asleep. It sounded like everyone else was out cold, it was dead quiet out there.

Suddenly, there's a knock at my bedroom door.

I look up from my phone, furrowing my brows a little. Who could that be? Joe?

"Yeah?" I ask in a confused tone, resting my phone in my lap.

"Can I come in for a bit?"

Holy fuck

It's Ted.

At my door.

At my fucking door.

"...Why?" I ask, sounding even more befuddled. Ted responds back with something, but I can barely hear him over the door. "Open the door, I can barely hear you."

Ted slowly opens the door, in the same blue shirt he was wearing earlier with some sweatpants on instead and a laptop in his free hand. "Tanner fell asleep in my bed and his door is locked."

"How did Tanner fall asleep in your bed?"

"We were playing Smash Bros on his switch and he--he just conked out, like magic."

As ridiculous as that would sound to the average person, I believed him. Tanner does just fall asleep sometimes. It's funny.

"What does his door being locked have to do with this?" I ask, pointing down.

"Well, I was gonna just take his bed, but I can't get in."

"Uhh-" I let out a nervous chuckle. "You're not fucking sleeping in here, weirdo."

"No, I--keep fucking dreamin', alright? I just need a space to rest my back while I finish this script. I'm sleepin' downstairs."

"Why can't you work downstairs?"

"Because that couch fuckin' sucks. Can I chill here for a bit or not? Like an hour, tops."

I let out an annoyed huff and roll my eyes, patting the empty spot on the bed beside me.

"Thank you." Ted mockingly bows at me before entering the room, closing the door behind him. I scoot a bit further away so he has more room, watching as he sits down next to me and stretches his legs out in front of him, placing his laptop in his lap.

"I don't see how the couch sucks." I shrug, looking down at my phone again. "It was pretty comfortable the other day."

"Oh cool. Can I steal your bed for the night, then? You can take the fuckin' couch." Ted looks over at me with an amusing smirk.

"Oh now you wanna sleep in my bed?"

"Not if you're yappin' in it."

"I wasn't yappin' in it till' you started fuckin' yappin' in it."

"Well now we're both yappin' in it when I need to be yappin' up my fuckin' work, princess. Quit your yappin."

"I'll stop yappin' when you stop yappin'."

"Alright."

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Good."

"Good."

I let out a huff as I hold back the urge to laugh, but Ted starts laughing quietly, making me start chuckling as well. I shake my head to myself, lightly wiping my eyes.

"God, we never stop, eh?" I chuckled, looking at Ted again. "No, I don't--I don't think we can sometimes." Ted admits with a grin, running his fingers through his hair briefly before returning to his laptop, scrolling through what looked to be a long page of words before moving to the bottom to start typing again. I look back at my phone and smile to myself. I'm so comfortable with this man. It's a little jarring to me sometimes, but I am.

Ted works quietly alongside me for a few minutes. I'm scrolling through Instagram with my audio muted, so the only sounds are Ted's fingers clicking down against his laptop keyboard and the occasional hum that leaves him. After a little while, the clicking stops, and he decides to spark another conversation. Writer's block gets the best of us, I suppose.

"What do you think about filming so far?" Ted asks me, turning his head once again to look at me. I like the way the laptop is illuminating his face. "I've really enjoyed it." I admit with a soft smile, settling my phone down in my lap once more. "I like...how challenging it's been, y'know? I wasn't expecting this to be the easiest thing in the world or anything, but the amount of problems we've had to solve and the anxieties I've had to push through...it's all been fun. I'm having fun."

"Yeah, it's been a ride for sure, so far.." Ted nods at me, lightly licking his bottom lip. "I've liked getting to hang with Tanner and Joe again, I got to meet you, Dan's a little strange at times but I think he's openin' up. I think he's chill. I like this....tight little group we've developed. I like it. Um..."

Ted pauses for a moment, glancing at his computer screen before looking at me again, his eyes searching my face as if he was contemplating something. "Can I be honest for a sec? Just...between you and me?"

I feel those butterflies in my stomach again, meeting his gaze with a gentle blush along my cheeks. He's so dreamy. "Absolutely.." I speak in a soft tone, giving him a little nod as well.

"Who was it that was supposed to be me again? Mason, I mean. Carl?" Ted points at me as he tries to guess Conner's name, shaking his head at himself. "No. Con-Conrad?"

"Conner." I correct him, a giggle escaping me.

"Conner. Thank you." Ted chuckles a little, looking down at his hand for a moment before bringing his soft eyes up to look into mine once more. "I'm...I'm kinda glad he didn't make it up here. No I am. I am glad he...didn't make it."

I'm met with an incredibly genuine smile from Ted, making me smile back with a quiet sigh, as if one of those butterflies in my stomach flew up and out of me. I didn't need to guess what Ted was implying there, I knew. I just knew what he meant, and it was incredibly sweet. Probably might've been the sweetest thing a guy has said to me in a long, long time.

"But don't tell Joe I said that, he'll probably smack me upside the fuckin' head." Ted makes a smacking gesture to his head, getting another flirty giggle out of me. "No worries, I'm great at keeping secrets." I reply with a confident grin.

"Oh are you?"

"100%.."

My gaze lingers on him, my soft smile relaxing as I gaze into his dark, earthy eyes. The lights were off when Ted had initially entered the room, so the only thing really illuminating us were the screen lights of his laptop and my phone, but still, I could take in every detail of his handsome face. His dreamy eyes, the unique curve of his nose, the plucks of his growing stubble, the little moles along his cheek, the small dimples he creates when he smiles, his quaint but inviting lips, the shape of his jaw, all that hair on his head...

"...Did you just look at my lips?"

__________________________________

|| Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 6 (smut) || Chapter 7 || Chapter 8 || Chapter 9 || Chapter 10 (smut) || Chapter 11 || Chapter 12 || Chapter 13 || Chapter 14 (smut) || Chapter 15 || Chapter 16 || Chapter 17 ||

[delopsia]

We were so robbed of Rhett and Perry just being brothers.

I want Rhett and Perry buying stupid shit and terrorizing their folks with it. Royal eating breakfast and looking out the kitchen window just in time to see Rhett gliding by on a neon yellow hoverboard, taking one of the horses out to the barn. Going out to scold him for playing with toys while at work, only to look over and see Perry on a purple one, trying to separate two cattle.

I want to see them getting into petty arguments and then banding together right after because Royal said something that neither of them liked.

Perry waking up early to steal Rhett's horse and trying to run when Rhett comes chasing them down because that's his mare, goddammit! "Look, you ripped my damn saddle pad!" "That was there before!" "No, it wasn't!"

Waiting until Cecelia looks away and exchanging food off their plates. Rhett isn't fond of steamed carrots and Perry doesn't mind exchanging his mashed potatoes if that means his little brother will clean his plate.

Them going out for drinks and winding up in a 2 v 3 with the Tillerson brothers because Trevor mouthed off about Rhett's most recent ride. They're outnumbered, but Rhett is quick on his feet, and Perry hits harder than a freight train. Ending the fight and then overhearing an older man chuckling about how they're definitely Royal's sons.

I want Rhett and Perry frantically cleaning themselves up so that their folks won't clock them for getting into another fight. Buying a case of cheap beer and drinking in the back of Rhett's truck until the sun rises or they run out. Whichever happens first.

Them realizing that they've got near identical birthmarks; Rhett has one on his left hip and Perry on his right. Getting annoyed when their momma says she knows. Because why did she never tell them?? It shouldn't have taken twenty-three years for them to realize this!

I want both of them red in the face as Cecelia tells stories about the things they got up to when they were kids. The time Perry tied a string to Rhett's loose tooth and yanked it out. How they got busted eating their Easter candy when they were supposed to be in bed. When they figured out how to drive the four-wheeler by themselves and got grounded for three weeks.

Family dinners where distant relatives come together, bringing up all the old times. And oh god, Dad is talking about politics again. "Perry, you trip me, and I'll do the rest." There's nothing worse than Thanksgiving turkey being ruined by an argument between Royal and cousin Steve.

There's so much that we could have had from these two!😭

[dumbasspimpster]

Katherine

Back then. "You make me sick" said Katherine. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

I squirmed and looked down at the table. I pushed my used napkin back and forth. I wanted to die. "I can't help it."

"It's hard enough that everyone wants me to *lose* weight! And now... this? Do you have any idea what that's like?!" she shouted. Her mascara was starting to run. She folded her arms as if she wanted to shrink into the booth.

"But you're beautiful, and I am telling you that I think so!"

"No! You can't find *this* attractive!" she said, gesturing over her body with her hands for emphasis. "I just... can't!"

But even as I sat there watching her slip away from me, puffy eyes, mascara running, tears soaking her shirt, I considered her the most beautiful woman I had ever laid eyes on. Such a beautiful face, such lovely skin, such luscious hair, such pretty eyes. She was perfect in so many ways. And yet she couldn't overlook the one flaw that everyone attributed to her, that I had told her wasn't even a flaw to me, that genuinely made her even more attractive and worthy to me. And I was going to lose her for it. Why did I ever have to bring it up?

"You're wrong" I said. "You're perfect to me."

She looked back at me and her face contorted in anger. "I don't want to be perfect to you!" she shouted. "I just want to be perfect... period!"

I said nothing. We just glared at each other.

"I'm going to lose the weight" she said finally.

"Fine" I said. "You'll still be beautiful." I honestly believed that she would be.

"Yeah right!" she said. "So go find yourself an actual fat chick!"

"I guess I will" I said. "Because you have some real fucking issues."

"I have issues?! You're the one who LIKES FUCKING FAT CHICKS!" she shouted. The whole restaurant went quiet. Everyone was looking at us, the teenage couple having a fight.

"I'm going now" I said, summoning up my dignity. I got up, took a 20 dollar bill from my wallet, and put it down on the table. "To find myself an actual fat chick, without all the issues" I said cruelly. "Goodbye."

I started walking away. "No" she said. "Wait Bry! Bryan, wait!" she cried after me. But I was out the door. I kept my back turned so she wouldn't see that I was crying too.

---

Present day. I am successful and married with two children with my wife Alyssa.

Alyssa is my best friend. We met at a sales seminar back in our mid-twenties. She was a chubby blonde with a sweet smile and a sunny disposition. We hit it off instantly and have got along famously since. We have pretty much all the same interests. We have a loving, trusting relationship.

A few years ago, Alyssa discovered running. It's gone great for her, and she's slimmed down considerably since. I love her and support her and am happy that she feels better about herself and is healthier. I hope she lives long and we raise our kids and grandkids and die in the old folks' home together.

But our sex life has suffered. We've gone from having sex three or more times a week to once every week or two. We're busy parents so it's difficult already. Things just aren't what they used to be for us.

There is an urge growing inside me to stray. It's everywhere I go, in crowds of people, my eye is drawn to attractive women and their bodies. Searching for opportunities that I can't act on. Fantasizing about what it would be like.

Alyssa and I talked about it, years ago, about having an open relationship. On one hand, she said of course we shouldn't expect to have sex with the same person for the rest of our lives. On the other hand, she was crying. We never talked about it since. It's too painful to think of.

I'm on a trip back to my hometown for work. I haven't been back since high school. I ring up some of my old buddies and we get together for beers. We get right hammered and the conversation turns from our careers and our families to our past conquests.

"Hey" says Mark. "What was the name of that chick you were dating in Grade 11?"

"Which one?" I reply. "There were a couple."

"The chubby one. With the pretty eyes" said Mark, drunkenly. "The one who broke up with you."

My heart sinks. It's painful for me to remember. "Kat" I reply.

"Yeah, her" says Mark. "Pretty face. Too bad she was so chubby."

"Broke my heart" I say.

"You should call her up" says Mark.

"No way!" I say.

"Yeah way!" he says. "Wait, I can find her on Facebook."

Facebook. Shit, I thought. It's impossible to just forget someone and leave them behind anymore in this day and age.

Mark plays around with his phone. "Aha!" he said. "Found her! See, pretty face."

He shows me the phone screen. My heart drops on seeing Kat again. The photo is old, she is young and beautiful and as I remember her.

"She doesn't want to hear from me" I say.

"Don't be a pussy" says Mark. "Here, I'm going to message her for you."

"No!" I say, and I reach for the phone but Mark turns away and taps at his screen. I hesitate. A part of me wants to go with the flow.

"There!" he says. He shows me the message he sent with the friend request.

"Oh God, Mark. I'm married, don't you know?"

"Yeah, to a woman 1000 miles away" he responds.

Mark taps away at his phone some more. We order another round of beers. The bar is starting to empty out.

"Oh shit!" says Mark. "She replied!"

"Why do you gotta do this" I ask him, taking his phone. The reply is short and includes her new phone number. I pull out my phone and start texting her.

"Kat?"

"Its been a while"

My judgement is impaired and my inhibitions are gone. Over text, we pick up on the page we left off on.

---

One hour later, I take an Uber to Kats apartment. My nervousness is palpable. Every minute I am in the car feels unbearable. Every step up to her apartment feels like an undertaking.

I reach the door. I take a few minutes to gather up my courage, and then I knock. I hear her footsteps, then the latch of the door. Over a decade later and she could have become anything, and I am about to find out in moments. The door opens.

Kat is just as beautiful. And she's become massive.

"Kat..." I stutter, still drunk.

"Hello, Bry" she replies. I gawk at her for a moment. "Surprise!" she says, sardonically, "I got fat!"

"You're just as beautiful as I remember" I say. "More beautiful."

"Shut up and come inside" she says. "You're drunk."

I step inside. Her apartment is small but clean, with no sign of any cats. She leads me to the living room and sits me down with a tender touch on the shoulder. "Sit down" she says, "I'll make you some coffee."

She leaves to the kitchen and I watch her go. I am floored by the sheer size of her. She catches me watching over her should and my face flushes. I sit there and try to compose myself for the next few minutes. When she comes back with the coffee, I smile at her, but she doesn't return it. She pours the coffee without looking at me and sits down next to me. As she sits down, the couch creaks and the floor groans and the fat of her hip expands towards me, leaving very little space between us. She crosses her arms and seems to want to shrink into the couch.

"Thanks for the coffee" I say.

"Why are you here?" she asks.

"I'm meeting a client in town" I respond.

"I don't even know what you do" she says. "No, I mean, why are you *here*?" Meaning in her apartment with her.

"I wanted to reconnect" I say.

"Reconnect?" she says.

"Yeah" I reply. "Why did you invite me here?"

"I don't know" she says, twirling her hair. It's a gesture of vulnerability that I wouldn't have recognized from her when we were younger. She was so confident back then, so insecure at the same time. Putting up a façade all the time. She has changed over the years.

She looks at my ring. "I see you're married."

"I see you're not married" I replied.

"Well, shouldn't surprise anyone." she says. Meaning her body. There is an awkward silence and we say no more on the subject of marriages.

"Why did you break up with me?" I ask.

"Break up with you? Why did you break up with me?" she replies.

"You told me I disgusted you" I reply.

"Well I wonder why?" she says. "You told me I would be more attractive if I gained weight."

"No" I say. "Not exactly."

"Yes!" she says. "I said I was worried about gaining weight, and you said, 'Don't worry' because I will only be even more attractive."

"Okay" I say, "What's wrong with that?"

"I had body image issues!" she says. "It messed me up."

"I didn't know that" I say.

"Yeah!" she says. "It took me a while. But I'm over it."

I sip my coffee for a while. She waddles over the to kitchen and returned with a baking dish full of brownie. She picks out a square and started eating it, spilling crumbs down her shirt and between her breasts.

"I eat when I'm upset" she says.

"So do I" I say, stupidly. She gives a mirthful laugh at this.

"Can I ask you a question?" I ask.

"Sure" she says.

"Did you love me?" I reply.

"Love you?" she replies. "Love you?" as if it is a joke. "Look at me, Bry. I am disgusting. I absolutely ruined myself because of you."

"Wait, are you actually laying that on me?" I reply.

"Bry" she says. "Look at me. Look at me. No seriously, look at me." I look down at her enormous curves, she is exploding with soft fat. "You told me you like fat chicks. You told me you find this attractive."

"I do" I said.

"Then what don't you get?" she huffs, exasperated.

"What do you mean?"

"Yes, Bry. I loved you. I fucking loved you! Don't you get that?!" Kat burst into tears. She grabs for a box of Kleenex on the table but it is empty. At this, she cries harder.

I reach out and stroke her arm to comfort her. She doesn't react. "Do you want me to get you some Kleenex?" I ask.

"No, Bry. You know what you can do for me?"

"What's that?"

She picks up and offers me the dish of brownies and I take it, confused. There are still several left. Then she grabs my thigh and leans in close to me and says "I want you to shove those brownies in my fucking face."

I nearly pull away but I hesitate for just a moment. It's enough. She works her hand over and grabs my cock, already hard, and starts massaging it through my pants. I take a brownie and stuff it into her open mouth and she chews away, sobbing. I reach over and grab a roll and start feeling around her body. Everywhere I go there are soft crevices to explore.

I feed her the rest of the brownies as I rub her tummy and tell her what a disgusting fat pig she has become. She is crying at the same time and tells me how much she hates me. When she is done, I make her get down on her hands and knees and lick the dish clean. I get behind her and pull down her pants and start to finger fuck her. She moans loudly.

She turns over onto her back and pulls me down on the floor with her. We kiss passionately and she takes my hand and places it somewhere in the softness of her underbelly and jiggles it. "Jiggle me, Bry" she says. "Jiggle my fat fucking belly."

"You fucking whale" I say. "You're fucking huge."

"Am I bigger than your wife?" she asks.

"You're way fucking fatter than her. You're like, three times her size."

"Am I the biggest woman you've ever been with?" she asks.

"You will be" I say. "By far."

"You did this to me" she says. "You made me ruin myself. Do you like it?"

"Yeah" I said. "I want you to be my disgusting fuckpig."

"Good" she says, "You break it, you bought it", and reaches down for my cock.

We fumble around for a bit and try with different positions to get me in. In the end, she has to lift up her belly and I have to mount her at an angle and she pulls me in.

Her fat pussy is tight and I struggle not to come instantly. I grab at her belly, her breasts, her pillows of upper arm fat, the softness of her chin, whatever I can. She jiggles like a waterbed.

I manage to restrain myself, and she comes first. "Oh, Bry!" she says. "Oh, Bry! Fuck me! FUCK ME!" She squirts all over my dick. "Holy fuck holy fuck holy fuck HOLY FUCK!" she screams.

"Holy fuck" I say.

"Did I squirt?" she asks.

"Yes" I say.

"Holy fuck" she says. "Did you come?"

"No" I reply.

"Okay" she says. "Here." She pushes me and I pull out and roll off of her and onto the floor. She struggles and rolls over onto her hands and knees, then turns herself around and straddles me and backs her enormous ass up until my face is engulfed. I struggle to ask "What...?" but I am muffled between the fat of her thighs. I lick and taste the sweetness of her cum.

She lowers herself down and I can feel her two huge globes of breast fat spread out over my lap on either side of my dick. Her belly engulfs my torso, spreading out over my sides. She takes me up in her mouth and goes to work.

I come quickly, within only a minute or two, and she moans and sucks greedily and swallows. "Mmmmm" she says, "your cum tastes good." She collapses forward onto me, freeing my face from between the fat of her legs. She is breathing heavily. I can breath again, but it is laborious beneath her weight. We lay there for a while.

"Kat?" I ask.

"Yeah?"

"How much do you weigh?"

"Bry" she says back. "I don't want to talk dirty anymore now."

"OK" I reply.

"Bry?" she asks. "Can we cuddle?"

I help her to her feet and she leads me over to her bedroom and she flops down on her back on the sheets and I plop down on top of her. We lay there like that, holding each other without saying anything. There is music playing quietly from a CD player on her dresser. We stay there and listen for a while until the songs start repeating. I am calm and breathing slowly but somehow too excited to fall asleep.

"Bry?" she asks, after a long time. "Do you still love me?"

I don't respond for a while. I think about Alyssa and the connection we share. I think about my kids with no small amount of guilt. I reflect back on my relationship with Kat in high school and the difference I have been searching for in every relationship since. I am sober enough now to know the answer confidently. "Yes."

"I still love you too" she says.

We kiss and make out and she climbs on top of me and inserts me and wraps her arms around me and we make love like that, her on top smothering me with her softness, pulling me deeper inside her amidst her thigh and pubic fat with each thrust of her hips. I explore and caress and jiggle and worship all of her soft parts, which is to say every part of her body.

"Oh, Kat" I say. "You're a goddess. A fucking sex goddess."

"I'm your sex goddess" she says. "These curves are for you."

"You're beautiful" I say. "Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful."

She just moans in response. She gets off me and I sidle up next to her and spoon her and she parts her legs and pulls me in, with some considerable difficulty due to her enormous ass between us pushing me away from her. We barely achieve penetration, but it is worth it. We climax together. "Oh fuck oh fuck OH FUCK!" she screams, and I feel her hot cum well up in my crotch.

It takes us both a while to catch our breath. There is another long moment of holding each other. But this time, it feels different.

Kat turns around and faces me and her face is full of sadness and dread. "Bry" she says. "I don't want you to leave me again."

"I don't want to leave" I say. "But I have to."

"Bry, don't go. Please." she says. "I'll do anything."

"I have to" I reply.

"No you don't" she says. "Leave your other life behind. You can stay right here with me and love me and feed me until I'm the size of the fridge."

"Kat" I reply, "you don't know what you're saying."

"The size of the fridge, Bry" she says. "We can have sex like this every day, only it will just keep getting better."

"Kat, stop."

"100 more pounds. 200 more. 300 more. Whatever you want."

"Kat, please stop."

"Don't you get it, Bry? It's because of you! There is nothing I want more than to keep wrecking myself, just for your pleasure. It's all I have."

"Kat, you'll eat yourself into the grave."

"Oh fuck yeah" she says, and she reaches down around her belly and starts touching herself. "Oh fuck yeah, say it again."

"You'll eat yourself into the grave." I repeat. "Is this what you want?"

She is fingering herself intensely and grabs me tightly by the bicep. "Fuck yeah" she says, "I want to eat until I fucking explode."

"You won't explode," I say, "you'll have a heart attack."

"Fuck. Yes" she says, jiggling and quaking with exertion. She is struggling to keep fingering herself so violently and so I reach down and help her.

"Is this what you want?" I ask as I work with my fingers to get her off. "To be a fat fucking blob? To die young?"

"Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. YES!" she screams. She contorts and adducts her thighs together and my hand is trapped in soft fat for a moment as she comes. She jerks and quakes as she comes down from the orgasm. "Oh, Bry..."

I am up and putting my clothes on. "I'm leaving" I say.

"Bry, wait" she moans, but I leave her there, a soft quaking orgasmic mound of fat on the bed.

[callmelyc]

What if a not so standard Klance beauty and the beast au? Stay with me here we got a lot to breakdown: Keith is a prince that hunts to protect his people and Lance is a shape shifting nymph with a horrifying natural form.

Keith doesn't always hunt but when he does it's to protect the kingdom his parents had loved so dearly so when the villagers on the outskirts come to him begging for aid he can do nothing but listen to their tales

It's fantastical. It's mysterious. Keith isn't sure he believed them that this thing lurking in the trees is a monster until he sees it on patrol with his own two eyes

It's eyes glow in the dark, the form is solid but moves as if it's liquid, it can shift with the light and smells like the lake mud.

The villagers complain the beast drowns their crops, haunts them, and keeps them awake at night with the stench and stress alone. Keiths mission goes from patrol to a hunt. He goes for months trying to catch the beast and fails every time.

It's in a tavern after another failed hunt that he meets Lance. Lance who cheers him right up, Lance who challenges him to a stupid game of darts, Lance with eyes bluer than the enchanted lake.

He's everything Keith could want and more. They end the evening with bickering and challenges. They run into each other in every crowd and every street.

Seeing Lance every few days quickly becomes the highlight of Keith's days. The hunt is put on standby as the sightings dwindled and Keith finally finds the time to fall in love

Their romance is a whirlwind, one that all the folks of the kingdom fawns over. Where there is Keith there is Lance, where there is blue there is red. Before long they are engaged and Keith knows above all else he wants this to be the rest of his life, lance and a family of his own.

It's as they get ready for the engagement ball that he thinks of the beasts again. How foolish could he be, trying to start a family when a monster like that still roams free?

The hunts start anew and it starts with a vengeance. Keith is determined to end this before their ball so he goes out every evening to hunt with his knights.

Lance always refuses to go, he looks worried but never says why. Keith figures it's the danger of it all, but he should've known better.

They fight about it, him and Lance. It's the worst fight they've ever had, bad enough that Keith fears Lance will actually leave. Neither is able to talk it out and it's lance that ends it all with fierce eyes and a deal "end the hunt and I won't leave. I'll stay forever if you end the hunt Keith."

"I have people to care for Lance!"

"Then put up a fence! O-or a barrier! This thing you're hunting has never hurt anyone. Whatever it is belongs to the forest we can't anger the forest." Lances voice shakes through his conviction, so passionate in his belief. He looks down at his feet on the ground, clenching Keith's hand in his "if we leave it alone it'll do the same. We shouldn't fear something just because we don't understand.....please."

Keith can't bare to say no, not when his heart is so distraught over this "I promise, I'll stop the hunt I promise."

The engagement ball goes off without a hitch, all eyes on them and the love between them. If only it'd last forever.

Keith sees the beast when coming back from a trip, it's further than the original sightings were and much closer to the castle his fiance resides in. He knows he promised Lance but how would he know, now was the time to free them all from this thing so they'd never have to worry again. He aims the enchanted arrow made specially for things that reside in the enchanted forest and his aim is true.

The arrow strikes clean through the beasts chest it shrieks in pain, writhing and clawing at the ground. Keith follows as it tries and fails an escape ending clear in the castle gardens where Lances roses reside.

The beast weakly collapses, finally giving up as Keith approaches the creature. What he never expected was for it to transform. Right before Keith's very eyes the creature shifts into his beloved. Into his Lance.

Wind gushes, growing angrier with every shallow breath Lance takes and Keith collapses as his side "what-"

His beloved begs to the wind for Keith to be unharmed as he bleeds into his very own roses but the god of the forest is furious his son was harmed like this....

"lance please don't go- please don't leave me I'm sorry!"

That he was feared like this....

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry please-"

That he was deemed a beast like this....

"You've treated him like a beast when he loved you, for that you will know the same fate."

Keith sobs, holding his loves dying body in his arms and at Lance's final breath the castle is swallowed by the forest, overtaken with roots and trees. Plants and vines.

Lance becomes a monument fueled by the magic within the enchanted arrow that shimmers gold in his heart.

The knights are turned to stone and Keith, the Prince of the Galra....is turned into a beast.

"Only love can save you."

~*~

No one remembers the kingdom, no one remembers the Prince nor his family but hundreds of years pass and in a small village is next part of the story.

The McClains are a family of 6, a Merchant father with his two daughters and three sons. The most beloved of them is their youngest, Lance.

Lance is known as their free spirit, a dreamer, a lover at heart. Everything he does is to make someone smile. So when his father leaves on a trip through the forest the only thing he request is a rose.

The village doesn't grow roses, any that try fail. every variety dies here it's a tale spread far and wide. The legends say they fail to grow because of a lovers betrayal. No one knows what the betrayal was but it was deemed so cruel that the gods forbade anyone else to have roses. Why? Well, no one is sure, it's speculated that roses were born from these lovers and at the loss of their love the roses died with it.

Either way, legends or not, it's popular for those that travel far to bring some back as proof of the journey and Lance wants nothing more than to see the beauty of one.

With a smile father goes, saying goodbye to all his childrenwith a list of things his children want.

Veronica asks for new books, Rachel for new fabrics. Marco and Luis ask for new bows and arrows and Papa McClain finds all this and more when he stumbles across an abandoned castle.

There's riches in the dusted rooms. Books in themassive library. The armory holds more bows, arrows, swords and daggers than he'd ever seen before.

Most of all, there's a flourishing rose garden.

The roses are so red, so perfect that Papa McClain can't believe his eyes. They are fragrant in the way stories describe them and he knows this is something Lance would love without a doubt.

He briefly considers taking a whole array of them for each of the children but settles on just the one. He can bring Lance back one day and they can all enjoy the garden as a family.

Just as he cuts the thorns away from a rose a deep sound echos. It's one he can feel in his chest, it rumbles and crackles in ways he can't identify. Unlike a lion, unlike a bear, the form that radiates the sound unearthly looms in the bushes.

Papa McClain drops the rose, drops the basket full of things for his children and he begs this creature to stay away.

The beast circles him and in the dim lighting he can't tell what this creature is. But, it's sounds are enough to tell Papa McClain that it's dangerous.

"You've touched his roses..." The voice rumbles, unpleasant.

"i-im sorry I didn't know they belonged to anyone-"

He watches the beast lean down to pick up the rose that had been dropped. Though the appearance of a monster, the clawed hands hold the discarded rose so softly

"Get out..."

Papa McClain didn't need to be told twice he gathers his wits and runs through the forest, through the trees and the thorns and he doesn't stop until he reaches home.

Through his tale to the children and through the night he can't help but think: the beasts looked sad at that plucked rose.

~*~

They we're forbidden from going through the forest after what their father told them. Yet when a merchant trip requires passage back through their father takes Luis with him.

None of them expected Luis to run back alone saying that father had been taken prisoner.

"T-the beast it was that beast from father's tales! It claimed he'd returned to harm the roses again and took him captive!"

"What do we do?" Rachel asks nervously, watching Marco gather the hunting supplies "we can't just go, what if we're captured too?!"

"We have to do something rach! We can't just leave him there."

Veronica scoffs, annoyed "well, if it's over roses then why doesn't lance go get him? He's the one that asked-"

"Don't start the blame game! It'll only cause more problems"

"Well WE didn't ask for something that got out father imprisoned Marco!"

"ENOUGH" all turn to look at Lance "I'll go."

A course of "no" "you can't go!" "Don't be stupid lance-" rain down as he grabs his cloak at the door

"Vera is right. I asked for the rose and papi got in trouble for it. The least I can do it help plead his case."

Veronica has the grace to look a bit guilty "just be safe ok Leandro?"

Lance hugs every one of his siblings "I'll be back before you know it. Just you wait." Then he's out the door on his favorite horse, his dearest Blue.

Lance reached the castle by nightfall and by the time the moon starts to fall he has his father set free on one condition

"A life for a rose" said the deep rumble.

And though the sound radiated deep within Lances chest, rumbling in unatural ways, he accepts the terms.

Lance watches his father flee the forest with blue in tow from the tower balcony. He'd agreed to take his father's place but to who....he isn't sure, for he never saw the beast. Lance only heard his voice echo through the abandoned halls.

For days he only feels eyes watching his every move. Watching as he climbs through the tangles roots and vines, watching as he explores the entangled halls and sprawling rooms.

Everyday a new outfit is placed in lances rooms, and every evening he's at a dinner table set for many yet eats alone.

This entire thing is... bizarre to say the least.

The clothes fit perfectly, the food is always to his liking. He's never once seen this beast and it annoys him, it irks him actually.

How dare this thing take him prisoner yet avoid him?? Is treating him in this way a game? Is it to make lance too comfortable, so comfortable, that he won't fight back when the time comes?

Well! Jokes on the beast then! Bc lance? Oh- he isn't giving up in the slightest!

Lance makes it a mission to snoop harder than before, to be more annoying than before. Vera always said he could talk their ears off and into a grave so lance does just that.

He talks.

And talks, and talks....and talks some more.

To the sky, to the walls, to the gardens and the frogs.

all until one day the beast snaps out from those shadows he resides, growling deep and angry "SHUT UP!"

Lance whirls around to stand eye to eye, toe to toe with this beast "make me!"

Lance tries not to flinch back, tries not to scream or flee. Bc for the first time in days he's face to face with his captor, with the beast that started this whole thing.

It's bigger than Lance, clawed hands...or are they paws? Glowing eyes that swirl purple but the most startling is the face. It's not quite a cat, wolf or a bear, yet has large teeth and fangs. This creature is nothing like any animal seen within veronicas research books

It moves as if it isn't solid, the light makes its form shift and dance. There's horns and bone protruding out with the rest of its body looking like shadow that's been scar covered. (Think Elias vibes)

"I could throw you to the wolves!"

At that lance laughs "yeah right! You can't throw the prisoner away that defeats the purpose of having any-"

"Why are you like this!?"

"why are you like this?!" Lance counters and at that the beast pauses, almost ashamed.

He observes the beast for a moment and realizes something "hey, what's ur name big guy?"

A huff "Keith...I wa-am, Keith."

Lance smiles, warily "Keith, who names a beast Keith?"

At that, the beginnings of an odd friendship blooms (possibly something more...)

"I don't know, who names an idiot lance?"

Lance gasps "TAKE THAT BACK!"

[vaporwavedoggie]

Hello yes, I'm going to rant on tumblr dot com about my religion and what true Christianity is and should be

I promise you this is just me getting my message out there and trying to get through to more.. hateful Christians hopefully

Alright so. I understand there are many interpretations of The Bible. Let's start off with the whole "Lgbt+ folks are evil and ungodly" shit.

Do yourself a favor and look up the original Latin translation of the Bible. You know, the one that has all those books removed?

Yes yes, so the original translation didn't originally talk about homosexuality, it talked about men... sleeping with boys. That's right babey, the Bible originally said being a pedo is a sin, not two guys fuckin.

And nowhere in the Bible does it say being trans is a sin ahahhahah

And here's a little thought experiment for you: even if it WAS a sin, you know what else is considered a sin in The Bible? Eating pork and wearing mixed fabrics. I'm not Google, look this shit up yourself.

So are yall REALLY going to pick and choose what sins people are allowed to do?? And ignore the MAIN MESSAGES OF THE BIBLE?? You know, "love thy neighbor", how only God can judge you and you shouldn't just anyone else bc you know, you're not God...

So imo what I've realized being a Christian is. A lot of Christians aren't focused on spreading the teachings of Jesus. They're focused on pushing a political agenda and personal beliefs in the name of God

They're focused on having a power trip and putting other people down. If they were TRULY focused on the teachings of the Bible, they'd accept EVERYONE REGARDLESS OF WHO THEY ARE. Hell, Jesus was friends with prostitutes and the homeless. He didn't judge anyone

He just spread his word and his word was a message of kindness. Interpret The Bible how you will, but do you really think Jesus or God would want you to hate your fellow brother in his name? To wish harm or death upon anyone else just because you don't agree with their lifestyle?

True Christianity focuses on spreading love. I'm so out of touch with many Christians because I don't believe in hate. I don't believe in judging, because the Bible literally says not to judge anyone when you have sinned yourself. And everyone ever has sinned.

And when I tell people I'm Christian, I have to go into my beliefs because many are afraid that like most, I don't accept anyone and I'll spread blind hate. Which isn't how it should be. Hell I'm LGBT+ myself. It's pretty fucking sad that there are so many Christians that spread hateful rhetoric that nowadays, when you tell people you're Christian, they have to question whether or not you'll harm/judge them. Which isn't how it should be at all. This isn't the message Jesus wanted to spread.

So tl;dr: regardless of if you're LGBT, a sex worker, a drug addict, homeless, whatever the hell you are, God loves you and accepts you, as he does all his children. I understand if you have religious trauma and I won't push my religion down your throat

But in MY version of Christianity, my God is a loving God. I don't talk about my religion much but I'm tired of seeing hateful Christians. I promise you not all of us are like that, and regardless of your lifestyle I fucking love and accept you and won't judge you no matter what

My tumblr is a safe space for yall. All walks of life are welcome here. You are loved. And not just because it's what The Bible taught me, but it's because this is the message I believe with all my heart and will continue to spread.

I love you!! Rant over

[monstersandmaw]

i saw your post about feeling like it isn't worth it to write cuz of reblogs lacking etc and wanted to let you know that even if they're not interacting with it, somebody out there saw it and enjoyed it, or even needed it.

i feel a bit bad for dragging my feet on this, am sorri, but i wanted to say thank you for your writing, the way you build up your little worlds and scenes and characters, and fill them with this genuine little warm and cozy feeling that you can just curl up in. (and pull off plot beats and subtle hints like a pro. :})

because i stumbled across your stories when i was at a severe low point, trying to patch myself up mentally after an abusive mess. and your stories, your writing, all the warmth and coziness and genuineness and just how sweet and intimate you craft relationships- it helped. deeply. it helped remind me what a good healthy and loving relationship looks like, what i should look up to and gauge a future one on, what i shouldn't bend on just because someone doesn't like it - and yes, i know, you're not the sole arbiter of relationship standards, please don't worry - but it still helped so much then. it reminded me that the hell i went though wasn't normal, wasn't on me, and i kept going thru your stories to remind me on the worse days. and those bad days kept coming less, because reminding me eventually gave me a small little constant flame of understanding and hope and relief with all this. and so your writing means and represents so fucking much to me. so thank you. so much.

obviously one person's experience doesn't make up for that work-to-appreciation ratio, or even a tiny number. but i hope knowing that for someone, (maybe even many someones), your writing represents more than just regular reading fodder- helps lessen the feeling of writing not being worth it for you. even if it's a tiny tiny bit.

I don’t have enough words for how lovely and kind (and brave) this is of you, Anon. Thank you.

I never mean to guilt trip people into reblogging, and only ever mean it as a general rule to encourage people who don’t know or aren’t sure about the etiquette, or to remind people who just comment ‘more pls’ without any other effort/nuance.

For those like this sweet Anon who don’t have the spoons or the energy or the time or whatever, you absolutely carry on as you are. It’s always so hard making posts which try to get people fired up about reblogging because I know it’s also going to look like I’m pressuring the quieter folk to do something they’re not comfortable with etc.

Know that at the heart of it, you’re all welcome here, whether you’re lurking and chilling out, or reblogging left right and centre.

Thank you for taking the time and effort out of your day to reassure me with this, Anon, and I hope you know you’re as treasured and valued as anyone else who contributes to this community simply by being here with us to enjoy all the creations people share.

Take good care of yourself, and goodnight from a very warm room somewhere in the south of England :). 👻💤

[solarishashernoseinabook]

last second trick or treat request for will and alyss?

Here ya go! Have a treat to make up for all the trouble sending asks earlier :D

~

Alyss had spent a long and illustrious career moving up the diplomatic ranks.

(Not that ranks technically existed, of course. Except for apprentices and the head of every fief's diplomatic corps, all couriers were equal. But Alyss was quite high in the ranks they didn't have.)

Her prestige meant she didn't really need to take on extended missions, or travel very much. Really, at her age, she could have used the down time. Her back ached whenever she was in the saddle for more than a few hours, and she needed to squint to read the small printing on treaties. The delicate, gold-rimmed spectacles Will had given her for their last anniversary helped, but nothing made up for the difficulty in making the trips in the first place.

But she still did, for one very important reason.

That reason was tucked away in her satchel now.

She had just arrived back at the cabin from the Solitary Plain. She she smiled at the curl of smoke coming from the chimney. It was always good to know Will was home.

Tug must have given him a sign, or maybe he had been looking out for her, because Will was stepping down from the veranda as she rode up. He helped her dismount from her horse with a broad smile on his face, and kissed her. 'Welcome home, darling.'

'Thirty years of marriage, and you always welcome me back as though it was our first time apart,' Alyss teased.

'I'll keep doing it, too.' Will grinned. 'It could be worse. I could be utterly insufferable and greet you with flowers and a song every time you come back from somewhere.'

'Ugh! No thank you.' Alyss laughed and rubbed at some knots in her back. 'Will, I'm sorry, do you mind drawing me a hot bath while I unsaddle Nelly?'

'Are you sure you don't want me taking care of her?' Will asked. 'You shouldn't be lifting a saddle if you're in pain, you'll just make yourself feel worse.'

'Well, I suppose I could go inside, and get the bath ready myself while you take care of Nelly,' Alyss said, in feigned concession. 'But I just know if I sit and wait for all those kettles of water to boil, my muscles would seize up, and then I wouldn't be able to get into the bath at all. And no,' Alyss held up her hand before Will could even open his mouth, 'you can't do both for me, because that wouldn't be fair.'

Will couldn't hide his grin. 'Y'know, most wives try to get out of the more physically demanding task.'

'If you'd wanted a wife like that, you should've married someone else.' Alyss pecked Will's cheek, then took Nelly into the stable. Despite how sore she had acted, she was well enough to unsaddle and rub down her horse, and give her some warm mash.

Will must have had two kettles boiling at once, because the tin bath was already half-filled by the time Alyss went in. He poured in two more kettles of hot water, then helped her undress and settle into the tub. Finally, he placed a stool next to her with a steaming mug of herbal tea that would help ease her aches and pains, and crouched next to the tub. 'Need anything else?'

'Can you get me my satchel, please?'

Will dutifully brought it over and Alyss flipped open the lid of it. She withdrew a sheaf of papers and handed them to Will with a smile. 'There.'

This was why she still went on missions, why she put up with the pain and travel dust and inconvenience. Alyss had spent their marriage collecting folk songs from every place she visited for Will to play on his mandola. At first there had been several new songs after each trip, and their cabin had been filled with music from all over Araluen and beyond, but as the years passed it had gotten harder and harder to find new songs for him. These songs from the Solitary Plain were the crown jewel of her music collection - the people who lived there were so notoriously mistrustful of strangers that it had been very hard to find any music at all during her visit.

Will's eyes lit up when he realised what she had and he looked at her in delight. 'You found some?'

'Did you think I wouldn't?' Alyss teased.

Instead of answering, Will caught her chin and pulled her into a deep kiss, blindly taking the papers from her hand and putting them to one side. Alyss slid her arm around him and returned the kiss, and for a long time they stayed that way.

But the kiss couldn't last forever. Alyss didn't mind, though, because when he let go of her Will retrieved his mandola, and Alyss picked up her tea. Will sat next to her and tuned the strings, then picked up the topmost paper and played a few notes. He smiled as he got the feel for the melody, then he began playing, and singing the words that accompanied it. Alyss leaned against the side of the tub and cradled her tea, smiling as the music swelled around them and feeling herself falling in love with her husband all over again.

They stayed like that long after her tea was finished and the water in the tub was cool, Will singing and playing softly, Alyss humming along or singing some of the words, both of them sure in their conviction that life couldn't possibly get better than this.

[kwardo]

Day One

Thou hast stumbled upon mine Animal Crossing blog. I'll keep this updated as long as I don't lose interest in the game, which tends to happen a lot. I'll be playing the first game, as it's the only one I haven't paid much attention to. Besides the very basic objectives this game has to offer (achieve perfect town status, house upgrades, more..?) i wanna try and obtain all the NES games legitimately. I also *have* to replace the trees in town with golden trees. I just need to.

Starting off, I get taunted for being lonely. And I thought this was supposed to be a comfort game. I'm not really sure what he means by "getting friends to come here", though. Gamecube doesn't support online play, but maybe he knows more than I do? Maybe I'm just ignorant. Still, he shouldn't comment on my social status. I used to love this guy in City Folk. He was humble. He loved his fans, he loved *me*. But it turns out he's an asshole. Well, what more could you expect from a dog? I hope he gets kicked out of whatever label he's signed to. Let's see him handing out mixtapes on the street. Maybe that *did* happen, which would explain his humbleness in further installations of the series. I'm hoping it did. Anyway, I board the train, and I get approached by an anthropomorphic cat. Guess what he utters.

I mean, this feels like a poorly disguised fetish. It's like he *wants* to drool on me. It's like he said that, expecting a positive reaction from me. It's like he wanted me to say "Oh, no worries! I'd love to have your sloppy saliva on my clothes!". But that just won't fly. Not with me. I refuse to take part in this guy's sick fetish. If this is the first thing he says to an acquaintance, just imagine what's on his hard drive. Thankfully, this is the only time you see him in-game (and thank god for that...) But since I'm a kind soul, I put up with him. He figured out that approaching me like that wasn't exactly appropriate, so he resorted to small talk. Asked me for my name and all. I put in "Dre". It's short for "Andre".

He just laughed in my face. I'm starting to think that this guy is more of a social cripple than me. It's not like his name is any better. This is the first time I've seen a cat named Rover. That's the equivalent of being a man named "Aubrey", so I suggest he keeps his mouth shut.

He starts interrogating me. Asks me what town I'm moving to. Why I'm moving. Now, I try to maintain an image of glamour and wealth, but truth is I'm broke. And I'm forced to tell him that. I'm forced to tell him that I can't afford a roof over my head. He's guilt tripped into helping poor 'ol me find a place to live.

Just try and tell me this doesn't sound like two dope peddlers discussing profits. And here I was, thinking that this guy is just a gooner incapable of running a business. I never would have imagined that he'd be in the crack game. Dirty money or not, it doesn't matter. I need a home, and I need one fast, cause this train's gonna reach it's destination someday. I'm also not entirely convinced that he's helping me out from the goodness of his heart. He's a porn-addict, after all. He's probably doing this in the hopes of crawling into bed with me. Absolutely disgusting.

I get off the train, and *damn*. I look absolutely terrific. I bet all the quirky girls in town are gonna be throwing petals at my feet (that is, if they're not fast asleep already...). Yeah, I arrived in town a little *too* late. 22:39 (that's 10:39PM for you yankees). Gonna have to put off my lady killer antics for tomorrow, unfortunately. I know, I need to get my priorities straight, and my priority right now is finding a place to sleep, preferably warm. You can't see him in the image, but Tom Nook is *right* there! He's the only person in Katos (that's the name of the town!) awaiting me, and it's not because he wants to give me a housewarming welcoming ceremony. He's awaiting me purely for his own gain! He informs me of the loan prices, and they're quite generous, actually. First loan is 19.800 bells. Now, if you didn't know, bells are based off Japanese Yen (I *might* be lying here. I read this on the Animal Crossing Forums years ago, but it makes sense, right? Nintendo is a Japanese company or whatever.) Now, 19.800 Yen equates to 135.360 US Dollars. Now, I'm convinced that this is a money laundering scheme. Tom Nook is a dope dealer, and he's loaning off houses as a cover. 135 Dollars with no interest? It's a little shady.

This is the aftermath of my first deposit. I only had a thousand bells on me. Now, he mocks me for being impoverished, but I laugh back at his comically elongated nose. Just look at it. You could stack donuts on that thing. Kissing is probably very complicated in the Nook family. He offers, no, he *forces* me into working for him. Usually, I'd salvage my dignity and smugly refuse, but these are grim times. This doesn't stop me from slacking off, though. I'm gonna go and make a plethora of friends!

*Ow*. That's what I get for slacking off. You think this is an elaborate scheme by Nook to punish me for not happily waltzing into his shop immediately? Cause I don't. I think this guy is just an asshole. From now on, August 22nd, he's my enemy number #1. He's gonna leave town whether he likes it or not. There's a good reason as to why every acre around his house is devoid of residents. I think he's hiding something. Maybe he's involved in the whole drug thing? I feel like he would've been forced out of town by the other villagers. Tom Nook *has* to be the one keeping him here. Surely the others would not tolerate him, unless they're in on the whole thing too...A cartel town.

Now, I was approaching this guy's shop, mood ruined, until I stumbled onto this ball. Now, kicking the ball is quite fun, actually. It makes bouncy noises. They're such a joy to listen to. So much so, that I couldn't help but share the sound with the 2 people reading this blog. Now, I didn't realize that my microphone was on, so you're gonna hear me flicking the joystick around, but it's the thought that counts, right? :)

Now, this lady got mad at me for some reason. I was mistaken with some "hipster" (who could that be?). I suspect that this "hipster" dude is gigolo. The dialogue is *very* revealing. "I've been waiting here all night!". No comment.

She profusely apologized once she realized I wasn't her man. Weirdo. I'm starting to think that I'm the only normal one here. I don't even want to know what the rest of the town roster looks like. Better stop slacking off and get a job.

Wow, starting off great... This business doesn't seem profitable. Look at what he's selling here. Wallpaper, carpet, and a shovel. I'd get rid of those right off the bat if I was him. How often does one buy a carpet?

"**41.9% The percentage of the U.S. flooring market represented by the carpet industry in 2015, according to statistics from Marketing Insights**"

I'm too tired to try to decipher the meaning behind that statistic, but it's either saying that 41% of people use carpet, or that 41% of people don't. And there's a cactus and umbrella, too. *Nobody* buys that stuff. Maybe if he opened up a bakery he wouldn't be forced to operate in a shack. You don't launder money like this.

As punishment for being late, he made me wear this preposterous costume that I'm too ashamed to show here. He tasked me with with planting flowers, claiming that it would be "aesthetically appealing to visitors" or whatever. I wasn't really listening, was too distracted by his absurd nose. I did whatever any self-respecting person would do and planted the blossoms outside my soon-to-be residence. It's not like a bunch of poppies would make his sorry shack look any better, no? No.

He told me that I can't proceed without getting along with the townies. Actually insufferable. I don't wanna introduce myself to any more dodos, but orders are orders, and as much as I'd love to disobey them, sometimes you gotta be responsible.

Hey, it's not all that bad. This girl likes me (platonically! I'd never go out with a frog). It seems that she has her own merchandise, too (Note the cutesy frog T-Shirt she's wearing). Wow, there's one stable person here! She even let me walk into her one-room house.

*Oh*. Maybe the umbrella business really *is* profitable?

I also had to say hi to the mayor. He was at the wishing well, for some odd reason. Now, guess where you can ask for an apology? Exactly here, at the wishing well. I feel like he kills off his opposition in order to stay in power, and now he feels remorse. That's why he's here. Tom Nook even says that "You can find him by the wishing well", so this is a regular thing for him. The things people do to stay in power. You can even see how startled he is to see me there. "Eh? Whuh?" He's acting like he just got busted. Now, he's trying to distract me here with some really odd questions, like asking me which family member I respect the most. The reason he's asking me this really random question is because he worries. He worries that I know the real reason as to why he's at the wishing well. Now, I see right through him, but I play into his game. I know he wants me to say that I respect my Gramps the most, but I said Grandpa just to piss him off. He's probably divorced, too, so that's just adding salt to the wound, right? He promptly gets pissed off and starts boasting about his status. I don't care! Oh, also, the wishing well could be a metaphor. There's water in a well, and he has blood on his hands. How do you wash away blood? With water, obviously. The signs were all there, and I'm probably the first to notice them. I'd like to point out a pet peeve I have with this game. It's about the music you hear in the tutorial (when you work for Tom Nook). It's one of the best songs to come out of this series as a whole, and yet you only get to enjoy it for, what, 20 minutes? It's a shame, cause this would've worked as a 1-4 pm theme really well. Here, have a listen.

It's the biggest missed opportunity of this series. If I was smart enough, I'd mod this in as hourly music. But alas, I am not. I've just barely figured out HTML.

I had to advertise my employer's business in a letter. Now, I know how much *everyone* hates getting mailed ads, so I thought I'd try something more experimental here, so I wrote this mantra. It's supposed to represent the shop calling out to him. 50/50 chance it will work.

Turns out this game has cops. That whole "cozy, comfort game" facade has fallen. They operate a lost & found thingy, so I took advantage. Yes, I've been in town for 20 minutes and I already lost 2 of my tees. Silly me!

Turns out that Bob is here! He stuttered when I introduced myself and he's obviously socially inept. Asking me to give something to someone else when it's him that should be doing it? He's obviously doing it to avoid talking to..Oh, it's Spike. The asshole bull from earlier. I don't blame him for shifting that quest on me, honestly, I'd do the same...

Wow, okay, this means war. How could he call Bob a loser? The poor kitty is just scared of the world...I'm not letting him get away with this. I told him to sleep well tonight, because I will be banging my shovel against his bamboo fence anytime he gets rest, starting from tomorrow.

That scared him off good, so he gave me this really ugly shirt to try and bribe me into bestowing mercy upon him. Not only was the shurt ugly, but it also had sweat stains, bleugh. Into the dump it goes!

And just like that, I was done. I had paid off an additional 1,700 bells. It was NOT worth it, not one bit. The worst part is that I all the shops are closed now. I can't even dig up the daily glowing spot. That's a thousand bells I'm missing out on. We'll get 'em next time, I guess. For now, I can just go home and take a gander at what furniture I got gifted.

Yeah, I didn't mention this, but the villagers give you stuff when you run errands for them. They usually don't say *that*, though...

This is just bonkers, now. I have a kiddie table that's as big as my house. I guess that's where I'm sleeping tonight. There's also this thing I stole from the Police Station in the bottom right corner, but I'm not really sure what it is. It looks rad, though, so it's staying. And that was all. Writing this was *exhausting*, it took me about 2 hours, and for what? So that I can have 2 people read it? I'm *really* hoping that I don't get bored of this game quickly, cause that's what tends to happen when I try to get back into City Folk. Hopefully this one has something that keeps me coming back to it. I'll go and get some good sleep now.

[sharpth1ng]

Hey do you have any transfem Billy headcanons

I know you’re transmasc but I feel like transfem representation is really low compared to transmasc representation

So do you have any headcanons you might have for transfem Billy

Yeah feels like there's more transfem rep in mainstream media but less in fanfiction, which sucks. But there's never enough trans rep in general, we need more of everything.

In terms of transfem Billy honestly I have a hard time coming up with anything because the characterization of this character is very rooted in masculinity and a relationship to masculinity. Billy is a gay man in my mind, so I'm not really sure how to conceptualize of a non-male Billy. Once I have a characterization in my head it's hard for me to step out of that.

To be honest I'm also not always sure what folks are looking for with trans head-canons. For the most part hcs for trans characters don't differ from their cis counterparts, unless we're talking about what steps they took to physically transition, and I feel kind of weird making a list of trans hcs that are just about physical transition.

ALL THAT SAID, I want to give you something, even if I can't give you quite what you asked for, SO:

Transfem Tatum hcs

Tatum was a pretty shy and reserved kid before she came out, didn't talk a lot, didn't have a lot of friends. She became a lot more social and bold post transition

She and Sid have basically been friends since they were babies because their moms went to the same maternity class while they were pregnant. She never really had to come out to Sid, Sid was just there the whole time

Her mom always wanted a daughter so Tatum got to do a lot of shopping and dressing up with her. There's a bunch of cute/cheesy 80's mall style portraits of her and her mom dressed up from when they went on shopping trips

As an adult Tatum wants to work in fashion, partially because it was such an important and early part of her gender expression

Stu was the first dude she came out to. She was understandably nervous because he's an idiot, but he really doesn't give a shit and it doesn't change much of anything for their relationship. He's just horny, he doesn't care what parts you have

When she's older, out of Woodboro, and able to go to bars and stuff she makes an effort to connect more with the queer community that she didn't have access to when she was younger. As a result she ends up sewing costumes for the drag queens at her local gay bar. She is beloved.

Tatum's the first girl Sid ever had a crush on

When they're older her and Sid become that one extremely wholesome (but also not to be fucked with) lesbian couple that adopts all the local queer kids who aren't safe staying at home

So yeah, I know that's not exactly what you asked for, but I'd rather give you something that feels in character than force hcs that my brain can't quite wrap around. And by the way I'm not saying transfem Billy shouldn't exist, if anyone has that in them please feel free to write it!

[strangedreamings]

HOTD S2E4 (spoilers abound)

Halfway point of S2. No turning back now, folks.

God, I love the tapestry sequence. Threads of fate soaked in blood.

Daemon's dreaming, again? I'd say it's nice to see Young Rhaenyra again but her presence means our boy is losing it. Mental illness gallops in this family, so I shouldn't be surprised. I love that the crown is too big on her, it's a great detail.

Oookay, Daemon cutting her head off is NOT what I expected but yeah, just another sign of him losing the coin toss. Her disembodied head chastising him is ... an interesting touch.

Why are his hands bloody if he was only dreaming?

It's sad that instead of the four Muppet Tullys, we just hear of one and see another. Somebody with this show has no sense of humor and it ain't GRRM. C'mon, give me Grover, Elmo, Kermit, and Oscar, not just Oscar. Let the fans have some fun in an episode that is going to be nothing but pain.

Daemon, your sense of humor is not endearing you to anyone at all.

I just checked, GRRM hasn't said exactly how the Muppet Tullys are related to Catelyn Stark and her siblings, but that's not surprising -- there are huge gaps in most of the Great Houses' family trees.

Dismissing Oscar like that definitely isn't going to make him want to fight for you, Daemon. Of course, Daemon wouldn't know diplomacy if it bit him on the ass. Who in the fuck thought this trip to Harrenhal would be a good idea? Oh yeah, it was him. :P

I get a little giddy when House Blackwood is mentioned. What can I say, my favorite ASOIAF character is Brynden "Bloodraven" Rivers, the bastard son of a Blackwood mother and a Targaryen father, and the great-grandson of Daemon and Rhaenyra.

Ooo, does Rhaenys suspect that Alyn is her husband's bastard? (She's right, of course.) But touching his face like that, very creepy.

She does know! Corlys' past has come back to haunt their marriage.

"draw us back from the abyss." Too bad it won't happen. But at least Rhaenys knows the war is going to be very bad for everyone. She's not blinded by glory, duty, or anything else.

The dragon statuette Alicent's holding looks like it was carved out of Styrofoam, like it doesn't weigh a thing. Yeah, it doesn't sound like stone when it falls and breaks either. Where did the budget for this show go?

An abortifacient? And Alicent's pretending it's NOT for her? I'm sure the Grand Maester saw right through that. At least this is sparing Westeros from an Alicent-Criston baby. Can you imagine the utter nightmare such a kid would be?

Your doubts are nice to see but they're far too late, Alicent.

This Team Black Small Council is full of old men with no brains whatsoever. They do have plenty of misogyny, though. *eyeroll* Feed them all to your dragon, Baela.

I don't remember what Ser Alfred's surname is so I can't look him up but I really fucking hate him. I'm glad Corlys was able to shut him up (temporarily). I want a woman (any woman) to best him then kill him, is that too much to ask?

So, for two episodes running, we've seen the immediate aftermath of battles but not the battles themselves. It's a cost-saving measure by HBO, I'm sure, but they can't keep this up narratively -- it'll get boring after a while. I had to look up this one, it's the sack of Duskendale.

"Whore of Dragonstone," huh? Well, Criston, you're the Whore of King's Landing. :P

His white cloak is filthy. No honor in that man whatsoever and his cloak absolutely shows that.

Gwayne's face is bloody. I'm surprised he actually fought. He seems to be the type to hang back and let other people do the fighting for him.

"You are not fit for the white cloak." Tell him! He never was.

"Yours will come in kind." Too bad the Butcher's Ball (probably) isn't until next season, I can't wait to see it.

Ooo, Criston is avoiding Harrenhal! He's showing brains for fucking once. (It won't last.)

Green Small Council and they're talking about Rook's Rest. The ticking of the clock is getting louder and louder. Also, Aemond really does like to pout pensively, doesn't he? I'd hate him for it but fuck, he's too pretty (fucking nuts but yes, too pretty).

Things are getting tense between the brothers and the rest of the council is uncomfortably caught in the middle. Squirm, fellas. You deserve it. Oh, and where's Alicent? Knowing this show, she's probably hemorrhaging somewhere from the abortifacient.

Is this the first time we've seen any of Alicent's kids speak High Valyrian? But it looks like Aemond is fluent and Aegon II is decidedly not. Now I want fanfics of Aemond being firstborn and Aegon being the youngest, just to see if he would've been a better king. Looks like Aegon II realizes his baby brother does have strengths of his own.

No hemorrhaging but it looks like Alicent is making her own medieval heating pad. Larys isn't stupid, Alicent. It's in his nature to notice EVERYTHING, including the bottle you left out in the open. Aemond really didn't get his brains from his mother, did he?

"covered himself in glory" There's a phrase I never thought I'd hear in this franchise.

Larys knows about Alicole, lovely.

Back to Harrenhal. Daemon is following Aemond but I can only assume he's dreaming again, there's no way Aemond got there that quickly. Plus, we haven't seen Aemond's face yet. Besides, this is way too soon for the Battle Above The Gods Eye. I knew it -- "Aemond" has Daemon's face. Yeah, Freud would've had a field day with this dream.

Alys again. My apologies to the actress but I really fucking hate her voice. Nails on a chalkboard. (It's not her accent, that's fine, it's her voice itself.)

Daemon, a woman you suspect of being a witch gives you something to drink and you fucking do it? You have no self-preservation instincts left, do you?

Ser Willem's cute but I'm pretty sure the show's writers made him up -- Benjicot Blackwood didn't have a regent and I can't find any mention of his father having a younger brother. Well, at least he'll be nice to watch while he lasts (which I'm sure won't be long).

Hi, Laena! Back from the dead to haunt Daemon's conscience, I see.

As much as I like the Blackwoods, they really need to let their feud with the Brackens die out. (They won't, of course.)

"I removed them, I didn't burn them." For some reason, I really like the way TGC delivered that line. Whatever you're doing after HOTD, Tom, I intend to see it.

Aegon, you're merely a figurehead now. Unfortunately for you (but fortunately for the realm), you don't have the brains to be anything more.

Wow, Alicent really doesn't think highly of him, does she? I don't know if that's for the best but it makes me feel sorry for Aegon, just a little. If his parents actually gave a damn about him while he was growing up, he wouldn't have turned out the way he did.

Is that Rook's Rest? Title cards would've helped so much. If a castle wasn't in GoT, I can't be expected to recognize it, okay?

"They will not expect it because it is fucking madness." I hate Gwayne but he's right and I can't help liking that line.

"Are you afraid, Ser?"

"Worse. I'm rational."

Yep, I like that line too. Why is Gwayne getting all the good lines? It's making me like him a little and I don't want to.

Jace, your attitude is unhelpful. Show a little more respect to your mother and monarch, especially around other people. I'm not for corporal punishment normally but if I were Rhaenyra, I'd slap you.

Ugh, Rhaenyra's little trip has cost her what little respect she had from her small council.

Jace is a little too eager to use the nukes, isn't he? Kid, you'll never be a good king if you're this trigger happy. Rhaenyra wants to go, Jace wants to go. She undermines him in front of everyone. Good! Serves him right.

Rhaenys offers to go. Yeah, we knew this was coming.

Sorry but Jace is a brat. He's not ready to rule. He's not even ready to be the heir. He's too much of a hothead.

Ugh, the ASOIAF talk. Making this prophecy part of House Targaryen's legacy was a dumb idea.

Sunfyre nudging Aegon in the shoulder like he's a horse is just too cute. This'll be the last cute moment of the series, I'm sure.

Vhagar looks like she just wants to take a nap. Too bad Aemond didn't let her.

Aemond commands Vhagar in Valyrian, Aegon commands Sunfyre in English (sorry, Common Tongue). That says a lot about both of them.

Cole didn't want Aegon on the battlefield but he's not losing a chance to spin this to their advantage. Soldiers always fight harder when their leader is fighting with them.

Meleys vs Sunfyre. Poor Sunfyre is getting torn apart. (What can I say, the animals are innocent in this war.) He's bleeding out.

Vhagar really shouldn't be able to fly with that many holes in her wings.

Oh shit, is Aemond TRYING to kill his brother or is Aegon just in the way?

Poor Sunfyre's screeching sounds a lot like a bird (or a pterodactyl).

Rhaenys, you could've retreated and lived to fight another day.

Fuck this family, the Targaryen stubborn streak will get them all killed.

A seatbelt?! Do you really think that's going to save you against another fucking DRAGON?!

Holy fuck, the size difference between Meleys and Vhagar is ridiculous.

Cole got knocked off his horse while he was trying to get to Aegon. Too bad it didn't kill him.

I could've done without that jump scare, Ryan. :P

Not exactly how Rhaenys died in the book but honestly, I think I like this version better. She looked resigned to her fate as she was falling.

I think Cole might have a punctured lung. Or maybe that was just the sound of him trying to breathe on a battlefield full of smoke. I'm pretty sure he's got a concussion, but then he doesn't have much of a brain to injure. :P

Cole, you're on foot and you passed a horse just standing there. If you're not up for riding, at least bring the damn horse with you.

Aemond looking like he's about to do some more kinslaying, lovely.

A dying Sunfyre and an unmoving Aegon, lovely.

Aemond really has the devil's own luck. Too bad it runs out (next season).

Hey, writers, you spared Ser Harrold Westerling from his book fate, when are you actually going to use him again?

[charkyzombicorn]

Angst au where Ace and Sabo never adopted Luffy but adopted each other.

Enemy Ace & Sabo au?

Enemy Luffy au??

:)

You can now deem me as the official au idea giver-

Thank you for being idea giver Konton

Hmmmmmmmmm

In that scenario, Ace and Sabo never found out Luffy was being tortured. Luffy was beaten for several hours then Porchemy pulled out his sword to kill him but then one of the Bluejam cronies stepped in, said Porchemy was tired and shouldn't have to kill the kid, that he would take the kid and kill him so Porchemy didn't have to waste more energy. Porchemy was exhausted from punching for hours so he relented, and the cronie took Luffy ever-so-gently out of the ropes and outside. They asked the kid what he wanted to see, as a final request of they could give it. Luffy, barely awake but knowing if he didn't say something he would never say anything again, said "Makino". The cronie recognized the name.

So they went down the mountain, half expecting the kid to not make the trip with how much his bleeding was slowing down. But then they stood just outside Party's bar and checked Luffy's pulse - weak, but not gone. He gave the heavily injured child to Makino, who was white as a ghost and asking questions the cronie didn't have the answer to.

Makino got everything from the little first aid kit she'd kept since Garp started "training" Luffy, then started using a cut up bedsheets when the bandages ran out. Then once Luffy's bleeding was staunched she ran out and right for the mayor's house, hands and apron covered in blood. The mayor rang the bell above his house - announced Luffy was back and critically injured and to please donate any medical supplies, take them to the bar.

And the village was small, maybe sixty people in all, mostly elderly folks. But they all came in a drove to Party's Bar because while Luffy was always an annoyance he was always Their annoyance and they would do everything they could before letting any child of theirs die.

Luffy's recovery was slow - his wounds were infected, he lost so much blood, he was unconscious and fevered for days before he could get up long enough to eat something. But when he woke up and saw Makino and the mayor and all the villagers he could recognize he cried for a very long time.

--

Meanwhile, on the mountain, Dadan is panicking. Luffy had been missing for weeks, every time she asked Ace about it he would just say he didn't know and leave. Then she finally gets an answer - that Monkey D. Luffy, youngest grandson of Monkey D. Motherfucking Garp, was killed after refusing to give in to torture at age 7. And Ace looks at her in the eye nothing in his eyes holds remorse. Ace doesn't Care.

Dadan calls Garp. Garp is back as soon as possible, straight up the mountain. He tells Ace to tell him what happened to his younger brother, Ace says he wasn't his brother. Garp asks why not. Ace starts listing reasons - he isn't my blood, he's annoying, he's weak, he nearly got Ace caught. And Garp just says that to Garp, Ace is all those things. Ace asks then why Garp wouldn't kill him. Garp says because he makes exceptions for family, because he knows they care for him and he tries to care about them back. Just like how Luffy cared about Ace, for so long that he died without even telling pirates where to look for him. A hero's death, for Ace's sake.

Ace feels remorse, then, finally understanding what happened and not just what he wanted to have happened. And Ace feels impossibly worse.

Sabo suggests them being brothers, Ace says he's already let a brother die, Sabo says he won't die so easily but he lied

--

Garp eventually finds Luffy alive, heavily injured with new scars fresh on his skin, and Luffy begs him to let him stay with his village, with his family, with everyone that wanted to stay with him as much as he wanted to stay with them.

But Luffy can't be a pirate under any circumstances, so instead Garp takes him to Loguetown to train under Smoker in the hopes a younger, better marine can train Luffy without him almost dying.

[leatherbelt1295]

Your Daily Smile #2617

@ehan281

This should have been posted yesterday, but I didn't really get a chance to. I spent the previous 2.5 days with EHAN irl, and man they were just so wonderful... I'm so grateful we got to hang out again and do more than we did last time. Went during this time for a multitude of reasons since things lined up perfectly, but most importantly it was like a birthday present to him (5/29) and myself (6/3). We haven't seen each other since October 2017, so naturally I really missed him so much. ;w; That's way too long!!

We got to eat yummy food each day, got to meet his adorable doggy Sparky, met his folks, go through a mirror maze, played a laser busting game?, watch him do little runs of SpongeBob Battle for Bikini Bottom, watch the new Spidey on opening night with his brother, and went to a convention together and even cosplayed which was super fun! I went as Peppino Spaghetti from Pizza Tower (so if by chance you were there on Friday and saw Peppino, it might've been me!) and he was an excellent Cameron from Ferris Bueller Day Off. It was cool how often we were recognized, heheh. Really nice to see people's faces light up like that. Of course, we saw a lot of great cosplays too! Here's a few I saw myself that I got pics of, really nice stuff!

We got to play my favorite beat-em-up The Simpsons by Konami, and I'm glad EHAN and his brother really enjoyed it too! Really cool stuff all around, found plenty of gifts for my folks at home but also a couple things for me. Oh and Petra stuff and even comm'd a Petra for EHAN. :]

I haven't been to a con in 7 years, so being back at such a fun one was something I absolutely needed and appreciate immensely. Good times all around! I'm happy he and his brother enjoyed themselves too.

Here's my loot, though only the Jolteon and black shirt are for me.

We headed to Red Robin later on, and that was nice too! At least for me and his brother. :)

I went with the intention of recreating a certain Bocchi the Rock comic to EHAN. :))

And it worked. :)))

And the waitress didn't believe him when he said it was my birthday too. :))))

Ended the night with some 3 player Mario Party 2 on Pirate Land. We lost to the CPU DK because of usually MP shenanigans lol. Still fun!

And followed that up with me and EHAN rewatching Space Patrol Luluco as we do every June 5th, but a little early this time so it could be irl. A wonderful time as it is every year, but made more special being together and having fun irl! I'll be taking about that more on tomorrow's YDS though. :)

Wrapped up the visit with another good breakfast and visiting a lovely park, I really enjoyed that too.

Again, overall, I totally needed this trip and I'm eternally grateful for being able to do so. I really miss him though. ;w;

And I suppose I should mention a bit how my birthday was yesterday aside about half the day being with EHAN. I received gift art from friends through the day, including right at midnight and even today... Y'all really didn't have to... ;; But thank you so much... And to those who I know may read this and wanted to draw me something or whatever the case may be, but couldn't for any reason, just know it's more than okay and the fact that you even thought of me in the first place means a lot to me already. Wishing me hbd means a lot too... 🥺 So thank you guys too!

Even had a big surprise on the flight back home before departure. Someone close to me with connections actually informed the crew on board that it was my birthday, and if they could deliver a message to me for them, which they absolutely did... Even gave me free snacks and water, and invited me to sit in the pilot's seat which was !!!!!?? It was so cool what the heck... I'm grateful for that... 😭

Nice time spent at home with family, always nice to see them. It ain't a birthday without being with em, I'd say. Nice lil gifts too, they shouldn't have... ;; I do wanna show this Hank Hill in particular, gave me a good laugh and I love it, heheh. The Bocchi doodle too!

But yeah, I just wanted to dedicate this YDS to thanking @ehan281 and his brother for a wonderful time and express my gratitude of a happy birthday too. Hoping the next time we meet won't be so long! ^^

[foundry-fabrications]

Happy 5-Year Anniversary!

Hey folks! 5 years ago to the day I posted my first ever homebrew creation for the masses to enjoy (or ruthlessly tear apart), a little brew I lovingly called The Goo of Primordial Chaos. It would be fitting to have gone and reworked it for such an occasion (it certainly needs it), but alas, I haven't. I could have, and I've tried a few times, but honestly I don't really know what to do with it. So, I'm just not going to, and it shall remain a relic of the past and a reminder of humble beginnings.

Other than that, I have nothing special planned to celebrate, at all. So instead, I'd just like to take a moment to look back at my time here and take a trip down memory lane.

2018-2019

When I first got started doing homebrew for the Foundry, I hadn't been doing it for very long. Hell, I hadn't been playing 5e for long either. But inexperience didn't stop me from taking a stab at it. At the time, I had boundless creative energy and all the time in the world. I committed to doing one brew a month and that came pretty easy. Most of what I was making were conversions of other things, so they were easy to churn out at a regular pace. But I did quite a bit of original stuff too. The Medic was my first ever released class, and my Hellraiser supplement kicked off my now yearly tradition of doing a big project for spooktober. Around that time, I started a Patreon and got my first commission in the Awakener class. The first version of my Mourner was also released. I also hit 2k followers, which is insane to me still. Oh yeah, and I totally tried to jump to another platform when Tumblr became a dumpster fire for a bit. Forgot about that. Other than that, pretty good for my first year!

2019-2020

Kicking off my second year, my Corpseweaver class was released for Halloween, which is still one of my favorite things I've made. For much of the year I was still going strong with monthly releases and even putting out some pretty big projects. But the biggest project I put out that year, or at least the one that took the most effort, was a commission for John Carpenter’s The Thing. It was around this time that I started kicking around the idea of opening up commission to the public, not just my patrons. Spoiler alert, I shouldn't have. I also hit 4k followers that year. Still wild.

2020-2021

This was a huge year, but things did not begin well for me. The year began with Flesh and Bone, my Necromorph supplement, which was an utter train wreck. That monstrosity came together in a panicked 3 weeks after October blindsided me and was the first time I had ever tried to make a custom style for the Homebrewery. The mad dash to meet a frankly arbitrary deadline yielding a worse brew started to show the cracks in my process and was an ill omen for things to come. I kept up the monthly releases for a while longer, and put out some great stuff in that time if I do say so myself, but in July I hit a wall and just couldn't do it anymore. Since then, I've had a “post it when it's done” policy, and I don't intend to change that. I also stopped taking commissions from patrons after getting super overwhelmed and not handling it as well as I should have, BUT then proceeded to start taking commissions from the public. Other notable events included changing my name from 5e Foundry to Foundry Fabrications in an effort to expand into other games, not just 5e, I updated my logo to fit the rebranding, and I started a Discord server that burned hot, died fast, and is a desolate wasteland now. Otherwise, it was pretty much business as usual.

2021-2022

Year 4 began innocently enough, aside from the cultural faux pas regarding a certain Native America spirit that shall not be named that I later had to apologize for. Other than that, it was pretty much business as usual. But then in April came my crowning achievement. After 6 years of development, I finally released my Engineer class! I still can’t believe that this thing I've been wrestling with for years is finally real and for all the world to see. Kind of hard to top that

2022-2023

Another year, another spooky project, this time a much-needed rework of my Corpseweaver. And all was great, for a time. But then January rolled around and WotC dropped the shitstorm of the century on us with the whole OGL debacle. I, like a lot of people, did not take very well and went so far to abandon everything D&D, a rash decision I still regret making, even if I did come back to the game I love so much. But I bounced back pretty easy and jumped right back into making stuff, not that I’ve released much this year. But that’s future talk! We’re here to reminisce!

So yeah, that’s my history here in a nutshell. If you’re still here, thanks for listening to me ramble. What a wild ride it’s been, and I’m so glad I could have you all at my side and along for the journey. Thanks for sticking with me for 5 years, and here’s to 5 more! As always, stay safe, don’t forget to love each other, and I’ll see you all again soon.

Oh, one more thing, I’d love to hear from y’all in the replies! How long have you been with me, and what’s your favorite piece of content I’ve produced?

[gerogerigaogaigar]

David Bowie - Low

This was the first of Bowie's Berlin trilogy where he worked with Brian Eno. Influenced by krautrock bands and Eno's own ambient experimentation it is drastically different from anything he'd done before. The first few tracks recall some of the angular rock that was on Station To Station, but the entire latter half of the album is populated by spacey, ambient electronic explorations. The album basically becomes less and less rock and more ambient as it goes on. By the end Subterraneans is just an ambient track. Flickers of ideas pop up and fade away as songs evolve within their musical motifs. It's probably Bowie's artsiest album.

Cat Stevens - Tea For The Tillerman

I think I like Yusuf/Cat Stevens just fine. His music is good? I'm certain. I dunno it just doesn't do much for me. I can't really identify why. I like a lot of other artists like him so why shouldn't this album be up there with Neil Young or Harry Chapin? Oh well I'm indifferent to Cat Stevens.

Kanye West - Graduation

https://youtu.be/wvgehVhF9D4

https://youtu.be/e7e5BFJa-Ug

After two game changing albums Graduation is absolutely a victory lap. Ye seems content to prove that he could do this as much as he wants and we are just not gonna get sick of it. He's right. Graduation mainly continues what Kanye was doing on his previous two albums, beautiful lush beats with soul samples and strings. That isn't to say that he doesn't innovate on Graduation, in fact the best tracks feature significant electronic influence most notably Stronger and Flashing Lights. In the end we know where the story goes and Ye would not continue on this way, but the bleakness of 808s And Heartbreak only makes Graduation an even more triumphant finale to the trilogy of albums that marks phase one of Kanye West's career.

Nick Drake - Pink Moon

Nick Drake is kind of a hidden gem among the late 60s folk rock scene. Hipsters love him on account of how he died young and is obscure, but he never hit the mainstream. Drake's delicate airy voice is the aural equivalent of autumn leaves blowing in a gentle wind. He is the sound that old trees make in the winter. And if his previous records with their lush but haunting string arrangements didn't take him into the public eye then Pink Moon definitely wasn't going to. Stripped down to nothing but Nick Drake's voice and guitar Pink Moon is an album that sound like it might fall apart if you so much as breath on it. Gentle arpeggios make up the instrumentation and they are carried by Drake's unique sense of melody that is equal parts folk rock and tin pan alley. The album is stark, stripped down, and speaks of alienation and fear at every turn. It's one of the most beautiful and personal albums of all time and, despite what reviewers at the time of its release said, it's actually quite inviting as long as you meet it on its own terms.

Björk - Homogenic

Every step in Björk's career is a step towards further weirdness. Homogenic is a defining album in her career as it establishes the point of no return for her experimentation. The trip hop from Post is leaned into harder, but with more strings and crunchier drums. The drums have been fine tuned into a bit crushed nightmare and the cold string and distant vocals make the album feel apocalyptic. Björk albums are, as a rule, bizarre and unsettling but Homogenic manages a cold powerful dispassionate energy unlike any of her other work.

A Tribe Called Quest - Midnight Marauders

The first three albums by A Tribe Called Quest form a sort of stylistic trilogy. Midnight Marauders is the final piece of the trilogy and incorporates bits of both previous records. It's a little looser than Low End Theory and a little tighter than People's Instinctive Travels and I actually think that hurts it a bit. It doesn't manage the jazzy cohesiveness of the former or the free spirited just vibing attitude of the latter. Now being the weakest of the first three is kinda nothing, Midnight Marauders is a nine instead of a ten boohoo. But I might not put it on a top 500 albums list. Either way it's still a fantastic record with that unique A Tribe Called Quest sound, jazzy but not in a new jack swing way. They just kinda bop around dealing with serious and lighthearted stuff alike in a casual conversational style of rapping.

Sade - Diamond Life

Sade Adu manages to ride such a fine line on her debuted record. She manages to have the best of both the soul and sophistipop with neither of their downfalls. She is suave and sexy with a cool attitude but always avoids the bourgeois pretention of most sophistipop. She can manage lengthy love songs without the occasional tedium of 80s soul artists. She's somehow extremely catchy while also being low key. She manages these sweet bass grooves without it feeling like it's going to become funk or hip hop. She brings everything into her wheelhouse. It's an impressive piece of artistry. A singular vision recognized.

Pavement - Slanted And Enchanted

Slanted And Enchanted is a fantastic album. The second best of Pavement's output. I support this album being in the list but strongly oppose it being rated higher than Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain. Slanted And Enchanted is the most straightforward Pavement album. It has the quintessential 90s indie sound and it shows in a lot of their contemporaries work. Kind of wistful, thoroughly modern but with one foot in the garage rock of the 60s. Pavement really nail a sound that is exactly one step removed from the mainstream alt rock.