#flash flood 2024

[sourfacedlemon]

"virtue nor blade" 🔒

Written for forsworn ( @forswornn ) for the Flash Flood 2024 exchange!

Xenk Yendar and Edgin Darvis team up to investigate suspicious happenings and find themselves happening suspiciously. Also Ed hates mind magic and Xenk hasn't gotten laid in half a century.

Rating: Explicit

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply

Fandom: Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023)

Relationship: Edgin Darvis/Xenk Yendar

Additional Tags: Magic Made Them Do It, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Dubious Consent, hot new trope called self-aware sex pollen: the flesh is willing but the spirit is annoyed as hell, Knotting, magical mishaps

Words: 1,731

Collections: Flash Flood 2024

[thegodmaker]

and the heavens did weep

[marejadilla]

Today… I have overflowed myself

"When he called me, he told me crying that he was very scared. He was on the roof, he hugged the dogs, he told me that he didn't know what else to do except hug them… "I'm very scared, I'm very scared, I'm very scared"… Then the water came and took everything… I don't know where my partner could be, I don't know anything, nobody helps me…".

An ordinary woman, in Valencia, Spain. Today.

For more than a week, I have neither wanted nor been able to say anything about it. God save us from this herd of politicians. Of all of them. Of any colour. Of all of them. None of them deserve forgiveness. May all those people in Valencia and Albacete with so many terrible stories who have survived, be able to overcome it one day. To have a partner again, pets, houses, belongings… because they have lost everything. And they are not helping them nor telling us the truth. Spain. EU.

Dana, 06, November 2024.

[kinetic-elaboration]

September 27: Rain

Yes, I am definitely crashing and I guess that's inevitable. I'm trying to just lessen the impact as much as possible because I feel like that's all I can do.

I'm honestly still quite bitter that I looked forward to Friday as the reward for all the stupid stuff I dealt with over the week and then instead of the restful sort of slowing down and sliding into the weekend I needed mentally, everything just got 10x worse because of the weather situation. It was so bad out there. Like hall of shame weather experience level... I think I've only had one worse experience and 1-2 similarly bad ones.

I just... I am angry with other people because I think this was a top-level failure about basic safety. Like the university should have closed at 1 or 2 based on the weather forecast. It should have. Miserable as it was for me to walk through basically the worst hour of the storm, I would have wanted to drive through it even less. These are the conditions for hydroplaning into a ditch. They are! Which of your employees' or students' lives was expendable today hmmm? This happens with every bad weather situation from snow storms to hurricanes to tornadoes to rainstorms, every single time without fail: people make decisions at every governance level by looking out the window. "Oh I don't see any snow now!" "Well I mean it looks fine!" "In their defense it's just a little gray." With all due respect (none) that is not how emergency preparedness works.

This idea that you move to the safety of your own home when it's already bad out and not a minute before is so wild to me. Is this because I grew up in a place with a lot of inclement weather? Or am I just the only one with two brain cells to rub together here? Or are we so deluded about the importance of every millisecond of productivity that we simply cannot conceive of leaving an hour or two early under any circumstance?

The thing is that in weather like this, too, it's not going to get worse exponentially over time. There are bad hours and better hours. There is one sense in which it's cumulative--a washed out road is a washed out road--but other conditions will get better in a short amount of time. So when people ignore the tornado watch we had all day and the radar screens with the honking big storm on the horizon, and all that, because it looks fine out now, the next best thing they can do when shit does get bad is stay put where they are until it gets better. But when they see it get bad they get scared and now, NOW, we all need to move. Now we need to do what we should have done 2 hours ago. Now we SEE the emergency, so I guess it's real. Which is the worst thing you can do.

This is how it's 4pm and some people are already on their way out and the dean of students comes to the library and is like 'um, it's bad, maybe we should go home?' And then everyone gathers at the desk to discuss this and come up with answers like 'he has no authority here though?' (true? but??) and 'well the university hasn't closed' (yes, let's remember that when one of us gets into a wreck during some flash flooding :) ) and so on. The final answer: the inevitable final answer in an individualistic society where no one ever wants to take responsibility for or even basic care of others: well just do what feels safe for you!!! So, right, by that you mean "if you leave too late and get hurt that's on you." Got it. Glad we cleared that up.

Part of this anger--and this is like the fourth time I've ranted about this today and I did not mean to, though by the fire of my annoyance I am keeping myself warm (feeling less depressed)--is that I do feel guilty. Should I have left earlier? Should I have dropped everything to run out at 4:10 and catch an earlier bus, ended up walking in the rain but rain that wasn't as bad? Should I myself have paid more attention to that same weather forecast, instead of relying on the judgement of people known to have piss-poor judgement on this topic, and left early, even if it meant taking leave time to do that? Should I have stayed an hour late at work, again to avoid the very very very worst that I walked through?

I do think my employer has responsibility for my safety to some degree. I really do. You require me to come in so you should have some sort of awareness of what I risk by traveling to and from this required location. But maybe I'm just putting off blame... I do know I get extra defensive when I feel some sort of guilt.

Fuck it was so absolutely miserable. I had to walk repeatedly through water up to my ankles because there was no way around the deep puddles. My whole back was soaked and part of my arm before I got on the bus. The walk to my apartment was even worse: more puddles starting to resemble lakes, plus I got a rock in my shoe, and worst of all my umbrella got stuck so I had to hold it open for a while, and then when I paused to close and reopen it I got drenched and also somehow almost run over by a bicyclist. Sir get the fuck off the sidewalk I don't fucking care.

I have to say I really lost it when I saw the water overflowing the storm ditches. The ones along my road are pretty deep and they were literally overflowing onto the grass. It just made me realize how bad this was. Like no, I was being yanked around before. I was.

My clothes are so fucking drenched that they are still drying in the tub. I wrung out my skirt as much as I could... it's still bad.

I'm just so tired. I did take a nap, rather a long one, rather a too long one, and now it's later than I want it to be. I don't know about this weekend... I want badly for it not to be a lost time but I also feel SO utterly drained, I don't know how long it will take me to recover from this.

[tornadoquest]

Tornado Quest Top Science Links For September 7 - 14, 2024 #science #weather #climate #climatechange #environment #hurricane #health

Greetings everybody! Thanks so much for visiting. The Gulf of Mexico came alive this week with Hurricane Francine. We’re at peak season for hurricane potential and the Atlantic has a few areas of concern that bear watching. While preparedness supplies are plentiful and the Atlantic is somewhat quiet (for the moment), now is the time to get prepared for a tropical storm or hurricane. I’ve plenty…

[propicsmedia]

CBC News: The National | Massive B.C. landslide prompts flood fears

[meteorologistaustenlonek]

Tennessee Severe Weather Awareness Week 2024 - Monday's topic: floods and flash floods

"Flooding is a coast-to-coast threat to some part of the United States and its territories nearly every day of the year. This site is designed to teach you how to stay safe in a flood event.

You will also learn how the National Weather Service keeps you aware of potentially dangerous flooding situations through alerts and warnings."

[reasonsforhope]

The Klamath River’s salmon population has declined due to myriad factors, but the biggest culprit is believed to be a series of dams built along the river from 1918 to 1962, cutting off fish migration routes.

Now, after decades of Indigenous advocacy, four of the structures are being demolished as part of the largest dam removal project in United States history. In November, crews finished removing the first of the four dams as part of a push to restore 644 kilometres (400 miles) of fish habitat.

“Dam removal is the largest single step that we can take to restore the Klamath River ecosystem,” [Barry McCovey, a member of the Yurok Tribe and director of tribal fisheries,] told Al Jazeera. “We’re going to see benefits to the ecosystem and then, in turn, to the fishery for decades and decades to come.” ...

A ‘watershed moment’

Four years later, [after a catastrophic fish die-off in 2002,] in 2006, the licence for the hydroelectric dams expired. That created an opportunity, according to Mark Bransom, CEO of the Klamath River Renewal Corporation (KRRC), a nonprofit founded to oversee the dam removals.

Standards for protecting fisheries had increased since the initial license was issued, and the utility company responsible for the dams faced a choice. It could either upgrade the dams at an economic loss or enter into a settlement agreement that would allow it to operate the dams until they could be demolished.

“A big driver was the economics — knowing that they would have to modify these facilities to bring them up to modern environmental standards,” Bransom explained. “And the economics just didn’t pencil out.”

The utility company chose the settlement. In 2016, the KRRC was created to work with the state governments of California and Oregon to demolish the dams.

Final approval for the deal came in 2022, in what Bransom remembers as a “watershed moment”.

Regulators at the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission (FERC) voted unanimously to tear down the dams, citing the benefit to the environment as well as to Indigenous tribes...

Tears of joy

Destruction of the first dam — the smallest, known as Copco 2 — began in June, with heavy machinery like excavators tearing down its concrete walls.

[Amy Cordalis, a Yurok Tribe member, fisherwoman and lawyer for the tribe,] was present for the start of the destruction. Bransom had invited her and fellow KRRC board members to visit the bend in the Klamath River where Copco 2 was being removed. She remembers taking his hand as they walked along a gravel ridge towards the water, a vein of blue nestled amid rolling hills.

“And then, there it was,” Cordalis said. “Or there it wasn’t. The dam was gone.”

For the first time in a century, water flowed freely through that area of the river. Cordalis felt like she was seeing her homelands restored.

Tears of joy began to roll down her cheeks. “I just cried so hard because it was so beautiful.”

The experience was also “profound” for Bransom. “It really was literally a jolt of energy that flowed through us,” he said, calling the visit “perhaps one of the most touching, most moving moments in my entire life”.

Demolition on Copco 2 was completed in November, with work starting on the other three dams. The entire project is scheduled to wrap in late 2024.

[A resilient river]

But experts like McCovey say major hurdles remain to restoring the river’s historic salmon population.

Climate change is warming the water. Wildfires and flash floods are contaminating the river with debris. And tiny particles from rubber vehicle tires are washing off roadways and into waterways, where their chemicals can kill fish within hours.

McCovey, however, is optimistic that the dam demolitions will help the river become more resilient.

“Dam removal is one of the best things we can do to help the Klamath basin be ready to handle climate change,” McCovey explained. He added that the river’s uninterrupted flow will also help flush out sediment and improve water quality.

The removal project is not the solution to all the river’s woes, but McCovey believes it’s a start — a step towards rebuilding the reciprocal relationship between the waterway and the Indigenous people who rely on it.

“We do a little bit of work, and then we start to see more salmon, and then maybe we get to eat more salmon, and that starts to help our people heal a little bit,” McCovey said. “And once we start healing, then we’re in a place where we can start to help the ecosystem a little bit more.”"

-via Al Jazeera, December 4, 2023

[jpnriikicore]

── good riddance

paring lando norris x ex!reader, word count 642, music gracie abram. i know it won’t work and i’m sorry, i miss you ( masterlist )

your fist raises to knock on his apartment door as anxious feelings bubble up to the surface. you have put seeing him again off for so many months. other than the time you saw a glimpse of him last december at the same shopping store in monte carlo. a part of you still wants him, but it didn't work last time. why would it work now?

as you knock on the door, you hear footsteps approaching from inside. you take a deep breath, trying to calm your nerves. the door creaks open, revealing lando standing there, looking just as you remembered - dark curls slightly messy, and those piercing green eyes that used to make you melt.

"hi." your lips went into a line as you gave him a small smile. you step inside his apartment toeing off your shoes, a forced habit. his apartment still looked the same besides the few current empty picture frames. you sit the duffle bag piled with clothes of his filled to the brim on the kitchen counter. memories flood your mind especially when you fought in his apartment. both of you left things pleasantly, but like every couple you had a few rough patches. mostly false rumors and his busy schedule drove a wedge between the two of you. you still couldn't make direct eye contact with him.

lando watches you as you enter his apartment, your discomfort is evident. he leans against the doorway, his arms crossed over his chest.

"hi," he responds, his voice neutral. his gaze flickers to the duffle bag on the counter. “come to bring me my stuff?

"yeah," you reply, your lips going into a line for a brief moment before flashing him a little tight-lipped smile as you nod your head.

lando watches you carefully, his expression unreadable. he pushes off from the doorway and approaches slowly, his footsteps echoing in the quiet apartment. "you look...well," he says, stopping a few feet away from you. "how have you been?"

"better now," you nod your head, you had been a wreck when we first broke up, but you learned how to be okay with being alone again. how to be okay waking up to a cold empty bed. you fiddled with your keys sliding off his apartment key. your arm extended out to hand him the copied key back into his warm hand. "i guess i don't need this anymore."

lando takes the key from you, his fingers brushing against yours for a moment. he looks at the key, then back up at you, his eyes searching yours. "okay," he says quietly, tucking the key into his pocket. "you didn't have to bring them back, you know.” he says, his voice low. he steps closer to you, his eyes scanning over your face.

"i wasn't going to throw perfectly good clothes away and i couldn't look at them any longer."

lando nods slowly, his expression unreadable. he reaches out, his fingers gently brushing against your chin, tilting your face up so you're finally looking at him. "and you couldn't look at me either, is that it?"

"it's difficult," you whisper underneath your breathe. "makes me want you back."

his thumb strokes your cheek, his touch sending shivers down your spine. "i miss you," he says, his voice barely above a whisper. despite his whisper, you heard it clear as day. he leans in closer, his lips hovering just inches from yours. "can i kiss you?”

"don’t ask to kiss me because then i will have to think about it and the answer will be-"

lando's lips curve into a small smile before he closes the distance between you, kissing you softly. his hand cups your cheek, his thumb brushing against your skin as the kiss deepens. you can feel his body pressing against yours, the heat between you rising.

© JPNRIIKICORE, 2024

[meshugenist]

Global Warming Has Accelerated: Are the United Nations and the Public Well-Informed?

James E. Hansen, Pushker Kharecha, Makiko Sato, George Tselioudis, Joseph Kelly, Susanne E. Bauer, Reto Ruedy, Eunbi Jeong, Qinjian Jin, Eric Rignot, Isabella Velicogna, Mark R. Schoeberl, Karina von Schuckmann, Joshua Amponsem, Junji Cao, Anton Keskinen, Jing Li & Anni Pokela

Pages 6-44 | Published online: 03 Feb 2025

Abstract

Global temperature leaped more than 0.4°C (0.7°F) during the past two years, the 12-month average peaking in August 2024 at +1.6°C relative to the temperature at the beginning of last century (the 1880-1920 average). This temperature jump was spurred by one of the periodic tropical El Niño warming events, but many Earth scientists were baffled by the magnitude of the global warming, which was twice as large as expected for the weak 2023-2024 El Niño. We find that most of the other half of the warming was caused by a restriction on aerosol emissions by ships, which was imposed in 2020 by the International Maritime Organization to combat the effect of aerosol pollutants on human health. Aerosols are small particles that serve as cloud formation nuclei. Their most important effect is to increase the extent and brightness of clouds, which reflect sunlight and have a cooling effect on Earth. When aerosols – and thus clouds – are reduced, Earth is darker and absorbs more sunlight, thus enhancing global warming. Ships are the main aerosol source in the North Pacific and North Atlantic Oceans. We quantify the aerosol effect from the geographical distribution of sunlight reflected by Earth as measured by satellites, with the largest expected and observed effects in the North Pacific and North Atlantic Oceans. We find that aerosol cooling, and thus climate sensitivity, are understated in the best estimate of the United Nations Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC). Global warming caused by reduced ship aerosols will not go away as tropical climate moves into its cool La Niña phase. Therefore, we expect that global temperature will not fall much below +1.5°C level, instead oscillating near or above that level for the next few years, which will help confirm our interpretation of the sudden global warming. High sea surface temperatures and increasing ocean hotspots will continue, with harmful effects on coral reefs and other ocean life. The largest practical effect on humans today is increase of the frequency and severity of climate extremes. More powerful tropical storms, tornadoes, and thunderstorms, and thus more extreme floods, are driven by high sea surface temperature and a warmer atmosphere that holds more water vapor. Higher global temperature also increases the intensity of heat waves and – at the times and places of dry weather – high temperature increases drought intensity, including “flash droughts” that develop rapidly, even in regions with adequate average rainfall. Polar climate change has the greatest long-term effect on humanity, with impacts accelerated by the jump in global temperature. We find that polar ice melt and freshwater injection onto the North Atlantic Ocean exceed prior estimates and, because of accelerated global warming, the melt will increase. As a result, shutdown of the Atlantic Meridional Overturning Circulation (AMOC) is likely within the next 20-30 years, unless actions are taken to reduce global warming – in contradiction to conclusions of IPCC. If AMOC is allowed to shut down, it will lock in major problems including sea level rise of several meters – thus, we describe AMOC shutdown as the “point of no return.” We suggest that an alternative perspective – a complement to the IPCC approach – is needed to assess these issues and actions that are needed to avoid handing young people a dire situation that is out of their control. This alternative approach will make more use of ongoing observations to drive modeling and more use of paleoclimate to test modeling and test our understanding. As of today, the threats of AMOC shutdown and sea level rise are poorly understood, but better observations of polar ocean and ice changes in response to the present accelerated global warming have the potential to greatly improve our understanding.

[meazalykov]

open goals

lena oberdorf x bayern!reader

part one here - part two - part three here

summary: love wins at bayern munich

warnings: angst, one mention of childhood neglect, this part is very long too, enemies to lovers.

after some time, in february 2024, everything changed. 

you get home after training one evening, still feeling the unease that you can’t quite place. you try to shake it off as you walk through the front door, tossing your bag to the side, and head straight for the kitchen to grab a glass of water.

your mind is still spinning with all the weird little moments from today, but you can’t quite put your finger on what’s bothering you. 

everyone being so nice, so... attentive. well, your european teammates have always been the sweetest– sometimes clingy– but today feels different. your intuition tells you so. 

your fingers drum against the counter as you stare off at nothing, you try to brush it off as paranoia. it was probably nothing, they’re being the best teammates that they are.

the pink iphone of yours buzzes just as you take a sip of water, and you glance down to see your national teammate’s name flashing on the screen. 

relief floods you; it’s been a minute since you last talked to her, and you need some normalcy right now, something that feels comfortable and familiar. you quickly swipe to answer.

“heyyyy!” you greet, trying to sound casual as you lean back against the counter.

“hey girl,” she laughs, her voice bright and cheerful. 

“god, it’s been forever since we last talked. i got bored and saw your contact so i figured i’d call you. i hope i am not interrupting?”

“you aren’t. i just got home.” you smile.

“okay cool! how are things? how’s training?”

“oh, you know, same old,” you say, forcing a smile even though she can’t see you. 

“just finished up for the day like i said. bayern’s... good. how’s everything with you? i know you just transferred from lyon to chelsea last month. how is everything? you’ve been at lyon since forever.” 

“forever as in a few years? ha i am doing good. the girls here are sweet.” your teammate says, you can hear the comfort in her voice. 

“thats great! jess mentioned that you were getting comfortable.”

“yeah, yeah. honestly, the problem is getting used to a new routine,” she groans dramatically, and you laugh, feeling yourself relax a little. 

“can’t wait to catch up with you when we’re back together at the national camp. what about you? how’s georgia doing? and the others?” your national teammate continues. 

you feel a little warmth spread through your chest at the mention of your bayern teammates. 

“oh, they’re great. georgia’s, well, being georgia as always. sydney’s loud and chaotic. nothing’s really changed, y’know? just the usual chaos.”

“sounds about right,” she says, chuckling. 

“but hey, speaking of georgia... she told me that you were getting a new tattoo soon by her? something about matching with some of the bayern crew?”

“yeah, actually, later tonight,” you reply, glancing at the clock. 

“heading over to georgia’s shop in a bit. i’m not getting one today, though—sam is. but... yeah, we’ll all be there.”

“oh, nice,” she says, and you can hear her moving around on the other end, probably putting dishes away or something. 

“what’s sam getting?”

“not sure,” you admit with a shrug, even though she can’t see it. 

“i think it’s a symbol or something. you know sam—always something meaningful.”

“classic sam,” she says with a fond chuckle, and for a moment, everything feels light and easy. just a normal catch-up between friends.

but then her tone shifts a bit, a hesitant edge creeping in. 

“hey, uh... you’ve been good, right? like, with... everything going on?”

you blink, confused by the sudden change in topic. 

“yeah, i mean... yeah, everything’s fine. why?”

she hesitates, and you can hear the hesitation in her voice. 

“i just... i don’t know. i thought you might be, um, worried. about... well, about the rumors and stuff.”

“rumors?” you repeat, furrowing your brow. “what rumors?”

“about lena,” she says softly, like she’s not sure how you’re going to take it. 

the smile on your face drops from the sound of her name. 

“you know... her possibly transferring to bayern.”

you freeze, the air catching in your throat. “what?” you say, your voice coming out sharper than you intended. 

“what do you mean… transferring? lena’s at wolfsburg. she’s been there forever and i remember lea mentioning something about her signing a renewal with them.”

there’s a pause, and you hear her take a deep breath. 

“yeah, i know, but... haven’t you seen the news on social media? like, there’s a bunch of talk that she might be coming to bayern. i mean, it’s all just rumors right now, but... i figured someone would’ve mentioned it to you. i thought... i thought you knew.”

you shake your head even though she can’t see you, trying to process what she’s saying, but it feels like she’s speaking another language. 

“no, no, i didn’t know. why would... why would lena come to bayern? that... that doesn’t make sense.”

“i mean, she’s one of the best players in germany,” your teammate points out, her voice still soft and cautious. 

“it kinda makes sense for her to move to a big club like bayern... i’m sorry– i know you hate me for saying that–but i didn’t think you’d be finding out like this. shit shit shit, i’m sorry, y/n. i honestly thought you knew.”

“no,” you say quickly, trying to keep your voice steady even as your mind is racing. “no, i... i had no idea. i mean... lena and bayern, that’s... that’s not possible. it can’t be real.”

“it’s all just talk right now,” she reassures you, but you can hear the uncertainty in her voice. 

“look, maybe it’s just rumors, you know how these things go. people are always saying players are going here and there. remember when the news said that you were leaving munich to go to new york?? that never happened! but... i dunno, i’ve been seeing it all over my timeline.”

you feel your heart pounding in your chest, and there’s a dull ringing in your ears as you try to make sense of everything. 

“you’re... you’re joking, right?” you force out a laugh, but it sounds shaky. 

“please tell me you’re joking.”

“i wish i was,” she says, and your stomach drops. “i can send you the links if you want to see for yourself.”

“fine,” you say, feeling like you’re on autopilot now, the panic starting to build in your chest. 

“send them over.”

the moment the call ends, the links start coming through—one after the other, headlines that make your eyes blur with disbelief. 

“wolfsburg star rumored to be signing with bayern…”

“lena oberdorf could be on the move…” 

“bayern munich set to sign germany’s young talent…”

it’s like the words swim in front of your eyes, and your breath catches in your throat.

you stare at your phone, feeling the world shift beneath your feet. it feels like everything is closing in, like the room is getting smaller and smaller, and all you can do is sit there, trying to remember how to breathe. 

lena. at bayern. in the same locker room as you. wearing the same crest as you. doing the same cheers and learning the handshakes. it feels like a nightmare, but you’re wide awake.

she’d never come here. she’d never... never follow you to bayern. not after everything. you told yourself.

but then again, lena was always one step ahead, always getting to you when you least expected it. 

what if it’s true? what if she really is coming here?

you shakily text your teammate back—hey, i’ll call you later,—but you know you won’t. not now. not while your head is spinning like this.

you make it to georgia’s tattoo place, just about two minutes late but munich traffic during rush hour was busy. the bell above the door chimes as you step in, and the familiar smell of ink and antiseptic fills the air. 

georgia’s setting up her tattoo gun for sam, who’s chatting animatedly with ana, lea, and sydney on the side. usually, you’d be joking around with them, too, but today you’re barely holding it together.

georgia looks up, smiling as you walk in. “hey, you made it! ready to watch the magic happen while sam panics the whole time?”

“shut up!” sam protests. 

you force a smile, but it feels fake, plastered on. you can’t focus on anything but the whirlwind of thoughts spinning in your head. 

“yeah... yeah, sure,” you mumble, feeling like your voice is coming from someone else’s mouth.

sydney notices the look on your face and frowns. 

“y/n? what’s up? you have the same face you made when we got knocked out of the champions league last month.”

you swallow hard, your voice wavering as you ask the question that’s been clawing at your mind the entire way over. 

“did... did you guys know about lena? that she’s... coming to bayern?”

the room goes quiet, and you see the way georgia’s shoulders tense, the way sydney exchanges a look with ana. 

no one speaks for a moment, and the silence feels like it’s crushing you.

lea is the one to break it, stepping forward and reaching out to touch your arm gently. 

“y/n, we didn’t want to tell you until we knew for sure. it’s all rumors right now—lena hasn’t told me anything about that yet. nothing is confirmed, okay?”

“yeah,” sydney adds quickly, crossing her arms, her voice firm. 

“look, lena’s a good player. if she’s coming to bayern, it’s not to make your life harder. she probably wants to be close to her friends, her family... you should know that this isn’t about you.”

“but it feels like it’s about me,” you admit, hating the tremor in your voice. “it’s like she’s... she’s invading my space, and i... i don’t know what to do about it. what if she comes here and makes everything... worse?”

you tell yourself you’re a professional, and lena is too. you tell yourself that maybe things will be okay. but the past still grips your chest tightly, reminding you of every moment of anger, every tackle, every taunt. and deep down, you know you’re not ready to let that go. not yet.

when lena confirms to the public that she will join bayern after this season ends, with the bayern pages itself posting pictures of lena signing the contract beside bianca-- you feel dread.

“what if she takes my spot? what if she bullies me in the locker room when you guys aren’t around?” you found yourself blurting out to pernille, magda, and tuva in the lounge room the following morning.

“what if she… i don’t know, what if she ruins everything and i’d have to move clubs?”

“süße erbse,” tuva said gently, placing a hand on your shoulder. “you really think we’d let that happen? lena’s good, but you’re y/n l/n. we love you here.”

“yeah,” pernille added with a grin, “you think lena can come in here and take away our süße erbse? not a chance.”

you wanted to believe them, but there was still a knot in your stomach. it wasn’t just about your spot on the team. 

it was everything—years of being belittled by her, the way she made you feel like you were always playing catch-up. and now she was going to be…here. in your everyday life.

when july rolled around, the first day lena officially joins bayern, you’re tense before you even get to the training ground. 

everyone– aka the girls from the german national team–have been buzzing about her arrival for weeks, and the news has followed you around like a shadow—reminding you every day that your former rival, the person who pushed you to your lowest, was now going to be your teammate. 

it doesn't sit right, and as you step into the locker room that morning, you can’t shake the discomfort in your chest.

there she is, standing by her locker, looking...different. softer than the lena you’re used to seeing in the green and white of wolfsburg. 

now, she’s wearing the same red bayern training kit as you, and it makes something twist inside your stomach. wrong. that’s what it feels like—just wrong. 

you want to turn around and leave, just pretend you forgot something in the parking lot and stall for time, but she spots you before you can move. 

her eyes light up, that familiar spark dancing in them—but it’s not taunting like before. it’s... welcoming. she gives you this big smile, the kind that makes her eyes crinkle at the edges, and suddenly it feels like the room is too hot, too small, like the walls are closing in on you.

“y/n, hey,” lena says, and her voice sounds...kind. friendly. nothing like the voice you remember yelling at you on the pitch, taunting you with every mistake. 

she walks toward you, like she’s genuinely excited to see you, and you want to flinch away. 

“i’m really glad to be here. i know we’ve had a past, but i hope we can leave all that behind and be teammates. put the rivalry aside, yeah?”

you force a smile, but it feels more like a grimace. “hi,” you manage to say, your voice cracking slightly. 

you can barely meet her eyes, your gaze dropping to the floor because looking at her feels like staring straight into the past—the tackles, the taunts, the years of feeling like you were always playing catch-up. 

“it’s nice to finally be on the same side, don’t you think?” she continues, still smiling, as if she’s trying to ease the tension. 

“i’m looking forward to working with you. i’ve... always admired how you play.”

the words are so dissonant, so out of place coming from her, that you can’t help but scoff quietly. 

admired you? this is the same woman who spent years making you feel like you were never enough, who relished in getting under your skin every chance she got. and now she was just going to act like that history never existed? like she never made you a joke, like you’re supposed to be grateful for her kindness now?

“right,” you say flatly, unable to keep the sarcasm from your voice. “well... welcome, then.”

you turn to walk away, unable to deal with the tightness in your chest, but the moment you take a step, lena calls after you, her voice softening. 

“y/n, wait—I really mean it. i don’t want there to be... any bad blood between us. i want to start fresh.”

you pause, but don’t turn back to look at her. every muscle in your body feels tense, like you’re coiled to spring away, and your mind is racing with every bitter memory. 

“yeah, well... some things aren’t that easy to forget,” you mutter before walking off, feeling like you’re practically running away towards the training grounds.

your heart hammers in your chest as you make your way to the pitch, trying to shake the feeling of discomfort that lingers. 

you hate how your voice sounded, how nervous you were—like a little kid facing down a bully. 

get it together, you're a twenty-one year old adult. you tell yourself, trying to block out the way she looked at you, like you were someone she actually cared about. 

you don’t know this lena, and you’re not sure you want to.

as you head out to the pitch, you see sydney standing by the goalpost, and you practically breathe a sigh of relief. 

your best friend on the team, your fiercest defender when it comes to lena, sydney notices immediately that something’s up when she sees your face.

“she talked to you, didn’t she?” sydney asks, her voice sharp. she’s always had your back when it comes to lena, never liked the way she treated you. 

all of the other girls at bayern hated how lena treated you, but sydney was more vocal about it. 

“what’d she say?”

“just... some bullshit about wanting to start over,” you say, shaking your head, your voice dripping with disbelief. 

“like she thinks we’re just going to be best friends now or something. like all of the shit she put me through doesn’t matter.”

sydney’s expression hardens, and she glares over at lena, who’s standing off to the side of the pitch, looking a little lost and unsure as lea talks to tuva. 

“what did she expect? that she’d walk in and everything would be fine and dandy?” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. 

“she’s got a nerve, acting like you’re just supposed to forgive her instantly.”

“yeah, well, i’m not,” you say, your jaw tightening. “not yet. maybe not ever.”

training starts, and as the drills go on, you feel lena’s eyes on you a few times—quick glances, like she’s gauging whether to approach you again. 

but every time she makes a move, sydney is there, blocking her path or shooting her a look that says, not now. eventually, lena seems to get the hint, and she keeps her distance, sticking close to lea.

after training, as you’re cooling down, you see lena approach sydney, her expression uncertain but determined. 

“hey, um... is y/n okay?” you hear her ask, her voice low. “i didn’t mean to... i don’t know, make her uncomfortable.”

sydney, to her credit, doesn’t sugarcoat anything. “look, lena,” she says firmly, crossing her arms. 

“you know what happened between you two. you know what you did. don’t expect her to like you immediately just because you’re being nice now. give her space. she’s not... ready for this.”

lena nods slowly, looking over at you from across the pitch, her face falling slightly. “yeah... yeah, i get it. thanks.”

you don’t know how much she means it—you don’t know if she really understands how much damage she did, how much she’s hurt you over the years. and you’re not ready to find out, either. all you know is that seeing her in the same kit, wearing your club’s crest, feels like a betrayal. and it’s going to take a lot more than nice words and pretty smiles to change that.

throughout the preseason she tried to engage with you more, but every time, you shied away. it wasn’t that you couldn’t talk to her—it was that you didn’t want to. 

not after how she made you feel.

lena, for her part, noticed. she wasn’t stupid. she saw how you avoided her, how you never quite met her eyes. so one day, after a particularly awkward training session, she turned to her best friend lea for advice.

“why does y/n hate me so much?” lena asked, frowning as they sat together after practice.

lea glanced at her, “obi, are you serious?” 

lena sighed,

then lea sighed. “well, it’s pretty obvious, lena. you’ve been pushing her around and treating her like shit for years.”

lena blinked, clearly taken aback. “what do you mean?”

“i mean, you’ve made her life miserable on the pitch,” lea explained patiently, even though lena pretends like the last three years didn’t exist.

“people have been making jokes about her because of you, and you…you’ve entertained it. you’ve never let up, even when it wasn’t necessary. of course she’s going to resent you. you made her feel small.”

lena was quiet for a long moment, her brow furrowing. she hadn’t thought about it that way before. 

she’d just always seen it as competition, as banter. but now… now it made sense. “i didn’t mean to,” she murmured.

“yeah, well,” lea said, “that doesn’t change how she feels.”

then, as if things couldn’t get more complicated, lena tore her acl before the olympics in the summer. it was brutal, seeing her go down like that. and even though you resented her, a part of you—deep down—felt sorry for her. 

you knew what it was like to be sidelined for months due to the same injury, to watch everything you’ve worked for slip away.

so, you did something you didn’t think you’d ever do: you texted her through instagram.

*hey. i’m sorry to hear about your injury. i hope you have a smooth recovery.*

you stared at your phone for a long time after hitting send, unsure if you’d regret it. lena responded quickly, thanking you, and trying to start a conversation. but you didn’t give her much, keeping your replies short, not really engaging. 

you weren’t ready to let your guard down yet, even if she is on the same team with your teammates protecting you.

over the next two months, lena tried again and again to reach out, but you kept her at arm’s length. 

it wasn’t until one day, after a particularly long rehab session, that she finally cornered you, her eyes soft but determined.

“can we talk?” she asked, her voice gentler than you’d ever heard it.

you sighed but nodded, deciding it was time to hear her out. the two of you found a quiet spot in the training center, and she looked at you with something almost like regret in her eyes.

“i didn’t realize…how much i hurt you,” lena began. 

“i thought it was just part of the game, you know? but lea explained it to me. and i finally get it now. i’m so sorry.”

you crossed your arms, looking down at your shoes. 

“you made me a joke, lena. you acted like it was nothing, but i had to hear it from everyone. people comparing us, praising you, and making me feel like…like i wasn’t good enough. and you encouraged it. you made me feel small.”

lena’s face softened, and she stepped closer. 

“that was never my intention. i never meant to make you feel like that. i admired you. you’re…goodness, y/n, you’re incredible on the pitch. you’re so fast, and the way you move with the ball—it’s like art. and off the pitch, you’re…you’re kind. you’re good to people. i didn’t realize how much that meant until lea pointed it out.”

you blinked, taken aback by her words. “what?”

lena sighed, running a hand through her hair. 

“i’m saying i like you. i’ve liked you for a while now. i just didn’t know how to show it, so i acted like an idiot. i get it if you hate me. i probably deserve that.”

you stared at her, completely caught off guard. 

“you’re joking, right? are you serious? you can’t just say something like that after everything. how can you feel that way after everything you’ve said and done to me?”

“i’m not joking,” lena said softly, her eyes meeting yours. “i like you, y/n. and i’m sorry. i really am. i know i hurt you, but if you give me a chance, i’d like to make it up to you.”

you swallowed hard, trying to process everything. part of you wanted to stay angry, to hold onto the grudge you’d built up over the years. but another part of you—one that you didn’t want to admit existed—was intrigued. 

was it possible that lena oberdorf, the girl who had made your life hell on the pitch, actually had feelings for you?

“i don’t know,” you said slowly, your voice tight. “you hurt me, lena. you pushed me around for years. you made me feel like i was less. i’m not just going to forget that because you have a crush.”

lena nodded, her expression serious. “i understand. i’m not asking you to forget. i’m just asking for a chance to prove that i’m not that person anymore.”

you hesitated, your walls still firmly in place. “if i even consider this,” you said carefully, “you need to apologize. really apologize, not just say it because you think it’s what i want to hear.”

lena met your eyes, her voice steady. “i’m sorry, y/n. i’m sorry for the way i treated you, for making you feel like you weren’t enough. you’re more than enough. you’ve always been.”

you felt something shift in your chest, a soft crack in the armor you’d built up over the years. maybe, just maybe, lena meant it.

“okay,” you said quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. “we’ll see.”

after months of unease, things start to shift. lena is at bayern now, and even though you’re not thrilled about it, you’ve accepted that she’s not going anywhere. 

she’s on the sidelines for every training session, every game, with that same determined look in her eyes, even though her acl injury keeps her off the pitch. 

despite the resentment that still lingers, you can’t help but feel like you’re softening toward her, little by little. 

you've been bayern’s top scorer so far this season. after every game, lena comes onto the pitch to congratulate everyone. she goes around, hugging your teammates, and when she gets to you, her arms open, but you freeze. 

“um– can we do a handshake?” you suggest awkwardly, offering your hand instead of leaning in for the hug. lena hesitates but nods with a small smile, shaking your hand.

“good game,” she says quietly, eyes lingering on you for a moment longer than necessary.

“thanks,” you mumble, trying not to meet her gaze for too long. 

it goes on like that for a while. lena is kind, trying to talk to you, but you keep your distance. until one night in the champions league group stage against brann. 

you’re in form, dominating the game. after the final whistle, you feel unstoppable, and for once, when lena comes up to you, the usual wall you’ve put up doesn’t feel as necessary. 

“that was an incredible performance,” lena says, her voice softer than you expected. “that goal of yours was fucking amazing!.”

something in her tone feels different, more genuine. you swallow, feeling a strange warmth in your chest.

“thank youu!” you say, and before you realize it, you’re leaning into her for a hug. it’s quick, but enough to catch lena off guard. when you pull back, you notice her slight smile, surprised but pleased.

lea sees it, of course. she catches your eye from across the pitch and raises an eyebrow, smirking as if to say, finally. you roll your eyes at her but can’t help the small smile tugging at your lips.

the next game, however, things take a turn. you go down with a minor ankle injury—nothing serious, but enough to keep you out for a week. you’re frustrated, but during that time off, lena reaches out again. 

"hey, do you wanna grab lunch?" she asks one afternoon after recovery workouts, catching you as you’re leaving the facility. 

you hesitate, unsure. 

“maybe... georgia can come too?” you suggest, hoping for a buffer. 

lena raises an eyebrow, but she nods. 

“sure, if that makes you more comfortable.”

later, georgia tells you, “sorry, luv, i can’t make it. i have some appointments at the tattoo shop today. you’ll be fine without me though.” 

you groan, realizing you’re stuck going alone.

the lunch ends up going better than expected, despite your initial reluctance. 

lena is... different. she talks about her recovery, how tough it’s been not being able to play, and how strange it’s been being around you in this new context. 

“i just want to say i’m sorry again,” lena says halfway through the meal, catching you off guard. she’s picking at her food, avoiding your gaze. “i know i’ve apologized before, but... i was really awful to you for a long time.”

you blink, surprised at the sincerity in her voice. “yeah, you were,” you admit quietly, not really looking at her either. “but... i guess it’s not as bad now. you’re trying, at least.”

lena smiles at that, small but genuine. “i am. i mean it, y/n. i really... i really do like you.”

you stare at her, the words hanging in the air. “you’re serious about that? you’re not joking? you actually... like me?”

lena’s eyes flick up to meet yours, and she nods. “i do. i know i haven’t given you many reasons to believe me, but... it’s not a joke. not anymore.”

you don’t say anything for a moment, processing her words. later, you find yourself going to lea about it.

“is she serious?” you ask her, sitting on the edge of your bed one night after training. “like, does lena really have a crush on me or is she just... messing with me again?”

lea tilts her head, looking at you carefully. “she’s serious, y/n. i’ve known lena for years, and she’s not the same person you faced on the pitch. she’s not as bad as you think.”

“really?” you furrow your brow. “because all i’ve seen is her making my life hell.”

lea sighs, shaking her head. “yes, she’s my bestfriend y/n. you only saw her bad side because you were rivals. but back when we were at essen, or even with the national team, she’s... she’s kind. she was always the first one to help out, the one who looked out for the younger players. she just got competitive with you.”

“you’re saying she’s always been kind? because i’ve literally never seen it.”

lea nods, crossing her arms. “i’ve seen it. she’s not just this tough girl who wants to win everything. she’s actually really thoughtful. she’d always bring coffee to the team early in the morning. she once helped a teammate get to the airport when she missed her train... little things like that.”

you’re quiet for a moment, trying to imagine this version of lena. “huh. i never knew that.”

“you weren’t supposed to,” lea shrugs. “you guys were always butting heads, but that doesn’t mean she didn’t care. i think... i think she just didn’t know how to show it. especially around you.”

you chew on that for a while.

in november– it hits you suddenly one evening after training before the uwcl match against arsenal. 

as you’re sitting on the edge of your bed, wearing comfy pajamas, your heart is pounding for no reason that you can explain. 

it’s like a creeping realization that crawls up your spine and won’t let go: you’re developing feelings for lena.

you bury your face in your hands, groaning softly. 

“god, i’m so stupid,” you mutter to yourself. you can't believe it—lena, the girl who made you feel like absolute shit for years, the one who seemed to thrive on making you look bad on the pitch, the one who’d taunted and tackled you like you were nothing.

how could you possibly like her? how could you feel anything for someone who made you feel so stupid and worthless?

but now, things are different. ever since lena joined bayern, she’s been... well, kind. showing you this softer, gentler side that you never saw before. helping you during training, throwing out compliments here and there, catching you off guard with that stupid smile that makes you blush. and the more you see of this side of her, the more it eats away at you.

lena is genuinely sweet. she’s... attractive. and that scares you.

you need to talk to someone—someone who understands, someone who won’t judge you. so, you go to madga and pernille, the two adult players you trust most on the team. 

they're like your mentors, the big sisters you never had, and when you knock on their door late that night, you’re practically shaking with nerves.

“y/n?” madga’s voice is gentle as she opens the door, concern immediately clouding her features. 

“what’s wrong?”

“can... can i come in?” you ask, your voice wavering. 

“of course,” pernille says, stepping aside to let you into their shared apartment. the space is cozy, a few blankets draped over the sofa, the faint smell of tea lingering in the air.

you sit down heavily on the couch, madga and pernille sitting on either side of you, giving you their full attention. “it’s about... lena,” you begin, hesitating, feeling your hands tremble in your lap.

madga and pernille exchange a look—one that you can’t read, but they don’t interrupt. they just nod, encouraging you to continue.

“i—i think i might... like her,” you finally confess, your voice cracking on the last words. “and i can’t believe it, because for so long i hated her. she made my life miserable on the pitch, and now she’s being all... nice, and i’m... i’m starting to see how... god, how attractive she is, and it’s terrifying.”

pernille reaches out, placing a hand on your shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “it’s okay, y/n. it’s okay to feel conflicted.”

“i’m just... i’m so angry at myself,” you admit, tears threatening to spill over. “she used to be so awful to me, you know? every time we played each other, she’d do whatever she could to make me feel like i was nothing, just... trash-talking, tackling me, all of it. and now... now i’m supposed to believe she’s this sweet, thoughtful person, like she’s always been? and the worst part is... i do believe it. and it’s like i’m losing control of how i feel.”

madga lets out a small sigh, nodding as she processes your words. “people are complicated, y/n. we all have different sides to us. it sounds like... maybe lena was just showing you one side back then—the competitor, the rival, someone who was tasked to throw you off of the game. but maybe that’s not all she is. you’re getting to see the real lena now.”

you shake your head, staring down at your hands. “but why now? why show me this side now? why couldn’t she have done it before? when i—when i actually hated her?”

“because it’s hard to show your softer side when you’re up against someone who you see as your biggest challenge,” pernille says softly. 

“maybe she didn’t know how to show you who she really was. but that doesn’t mean it’s not real now.”

“i just don’t know what to do,” you whisper, feeling so lost. 

“i don’t know how to feel about her. some days i want to push her away, pretend like she’s still that girl who used to treat me like crap. and then other days... i can’t stop thinking about her. about the way she smiles, how she looks at me. i stare at her arms too sometimes– gosh why am i saying that UGHH i don’t know if i can trust it. trust... her.”

madga wraps her arm around you, pulling you close in a gentle side hug. “it’s okay to be scared. it’s okay to feel all of this. but you don’t have to figure it out all at once. let it happen, y/n. let yourself feel what you feel.”

“but what if she hurts me again?” you say, your voice light. 

“what if this is all just... a game to her? what if i’m just going to be a joke again?”

“noo way. if so, we will stop that,” pernille says, smiling softly. “whatever happens, we’ve got your back. but you have to let yourself feel it, even if it’s scary. if you’re really seeing a different side to lena, maybe that’s worth seeing. or... maybe not. but you won’t know unless you let yourself try.”

you nod slowly, letting their words wash over you. maybe they’re right—maybe you’re overthinking it. but the fear is still there, lingering, because falling for someone like lena means trusting her, and you’re not sure you’re ready for that.

but as you sit there, sandwiched between madga and pernille, you take a deep breath and let yourself relax. maybe, just maybe, it’ll be okay. maybe this could be something real. and if it’s not... at least you know you won’t be alone.

by now it’s december, and it’s nearing christmas. the bayern locker room is filled with excitement. everyone’s talking about their plans for the holidays—family gatherings, trips abroad, dinners with loved ones. 

you sit in the corner, pulling off your ivory colored cleats slowly, hoping no one will ask you. you’ve always been good at hiding it, but this time it feels harder. 

there’s no family waiting for you, no friends flying in from home. just you.

sam kerr is the first to bring it up, naturally. she’s sitting across from you, leaning back with her phone in hand, already talking about her plans. 

“so, y/n,” she starts, her tone casual, but there’s a glint of curiosity in her eyes. 

“what are you doing for christmas? heading home, or what?”

you freeze for a second, then plaster on your usual smile. “uh, yeah. i’ve got a friend visiting,” you lie, trying to keep your voice light, like it’s no big deal.

the entire locker room listens.

"oh?" georgia raises an eyebrow. “which friend? anyone we know?”

you laugh awkwardly, shaking your head. "nah, just an old friend from back home. you wouldn’t know her."

"that’s nice," ana chimes in from the other side of the room, clearly not sensing the tension behind your smile.

“i’m jealous. all my friends are still stuck at their parents’ houses in colombia. it's family overload." ana continues.

you nod along, trying to seem as normal as possible. “yeah, well, it’ll be nice to catch up.”

but then, tuva joins in, her usual sharp instincts picking up something. she looks at you, her eyes narrowing slightly. "you’ve never mentioned this friend before. how come?"

you feel your stomach tighten. "we... we don’t talk much. they’re in university. we are just, you know, catching up for the holidays."

tuva tilts her head, still studying you, but thankfully, she doesn’t push further. instead, the conversation shifts as the others talk about their own plans again. but you can feel the tightness in your chest, the weight of the lie sitting uncomfortably on your shoulders. 

you can’t help but wonder if any of them can tell.

as you finish changing and start heading out, georgia catches up to you. 

“hey, y/n,” she says softly, her voice just a bit quieter, as if sensing something’s off. “you good? you seemed... i don’t know, distracted earlier.”

you force a smile again. “yeah, just tired. it’s been a long week.”

georgia doesn’t look convinced, but she lets it go, offering you a soft smile. “well, if you need anything over christmas, let me know, alright? we can always meet up if your plans fall through.”

“thank you,” you mumble, appreciating her kindness but knowing you’ll never take her up on that offer. 

you’ve gotten used to spending the holidays alone, and this year will be no different.

christmas day arrives, and true to your word, you’re alone. 

you walk to your favorite café, the one where the baristas know your order without you even having to ask. 

the streets are quiet, the festive buzz from days prior now fading into a peaceful stillness. you’ve got your true crime book tucked under your arm, planning to spend the afternoon reading, just like every year.

as you step inside the café, you smile at the baristas, leaving a generous tip in their jar. 

"merry christmas," you say, offering them a small nod before settling into your usual spot by the window.

outside of the team, outside of football, you consider yourself to be a loner. due to childhood trauma involving neglect, you don’t talk to your family. in fact, football was your escape from them. 

you never made an effort to have friends outside of the clubs you played for. the hobbies you have never involved meeting other people. you’re aware that you shouldn’t have your life surrounded by football, but it was the thing that saved you. 

even “she” couldn’t break you from playing football for those three years. 

you’re halfway through the first chapter of your book when the door swings open. at first, you don’t pay much attention, too focused on the pages in front of you. but then you hear familiar footsteps, and out of habit, you glance up. your heart drops when you see who it is.

lena.

you immediately duck your head, trying to hide behind your book, but it’s too late. lena stops mid-step, her eyes widening in surprise as she spots you. 

she pauses for a moment, clearly taken aback, before heading straight toward your table.

“y/n?” she asks, her voice carrying a mix of confusion and curiosity. 

“what are you doing here?”

you swallow hard, forcing yourself to look up. “uh... just grabbing a coffee,” you reply, your voice stiff.

lena’s eyes flicker with suspicion as she pulls out the chair across from you and sits down backwards on the chair, her arms resting on top of the wood.. 

“where’s your friend? the one who was supposed to visit?”

your pulse quickens, and for a split second, you consider keeping up the lie. 

but something about the way she’s looking at you, her brow furrowed with genuine concern, makes you crumble.

“they... they couldn’t make it,” you admit, your voice quieter now. “something came up.”

lena studies you for a moment, her gaze softening. “you’re lying,” she says gently, but there’s no malice in her voice. 

“there was never a friend. you’re spending christmas alone, aren’t you?”

you sigh, dropping your gaze to the table. “yeah,” you finally admit, feeling the weight of the truth settle around you. 

“i’ve always spent it alone. it’s... just how it is.”

lena’s expression softens even more, and she leans forward slightly, her voice quiet but firm. 

“you don’t have to spend it alone, y/n. come with me. i’m not doing anything either, my parents are visiting my brother.”

you blink, surprised by the offer. “lena, you don’t have to—”

“i’m not letting you spend christmas in a cold café by yourself,” she interrupts, her tone leaving no room for argument. 

“come on. i’ve got rookie at home, we’ll cook something, and i can put on some disney christmas movies. it’ll be fun.”

you hesitate, glancing around the empty café before looking back at her. “i don’t know, lena...”

“please,” she insists, her eyes searching yours. “it’s christmas. no one should be alone.”

after a long pause, you finally nod. “okay. but only because you said disney movies.”

lena grins, standing up and grabbing her coat. “deal.”

“also, what’s a rookie? you said you’ve got a rookie at home.” you question as lena holds the door open for you.

“you’ll see.” lena smirks. 

in her apartment, the atmosphere is warm and cozy. rookie, her dog, greets you excitedly at the door, his tail wagging as he sniffs at your legs.

“awe who’s this?” you smile, going on your knees as you scratch the dog’s ears. 

“this is rookie!” lena says, admiring you and rookie interacting. 

“this is the rookie!!!” you squeak.

“he likes you,” lena says, smiling as she watches rookie lay in front of me.

“i’m a dog person, and a cat person too but rookie is so cute!!” you bend down to give rookie a scratch behind the ears.

as the afternoon goes on, you and lena fall into an easy rhythm. 

you help her prepare dinner, chopping vegetables while she stirs the sauce on the stove. 

it’s quiet, but not awkward—just peaceful. every now and then, she glances at you, and you catch her staring, but you pretend not to notice.

later, you’re both curled up on the couch, a disney movie playing in the background while rookie lies at your feet. you’re comfortable, your shoulder brushing against hers, and for the first time in a while, you feel... content.

“thanks for today,” you mumble, your head resting on the back of the couch as you glance over at her.

lena looks at you, her expression soft. “i’m just glad you didn’t have to be alone,” she says quietly. 

“you don’t deserve that.”

you swallow, feeling a lump form in your throat. “i’ve been alone for so long, i guess i just got used to it.”

the taller german woman starts to feel an ache in her stomach. everyday she wishes that she could go back and treat you normally on the pitch instead of being a bully. if she knew that you went through this outside of football, she would’ve left you alone. 

lena’s gaze lingers on you as she thinks, something unspoken passing between you. 

“you don’t have to be,” she murmurs, her voice barely above a whisper.

and in that moment, you realize it. the feelings you’ve been trying to push away for months, the ones you tried to convince yourself weren’t real—they’re there. 

but you still have to ask her something, to find closure to the past.

still curled up on her couch with a blanket over your legs, rookie still sprawled out happily at your feet. you never thought you’d be spending christmas with the one person who used to make you burn with anger every time you saw her.

lena is relaxed, and you’re getting there, too, bit by bit. you’re comfortable now—actually comfortable—and you can feel her warmth beside you, feel the weight of how things have changed between you two. the silence is easy, broken only by the soft sound of the movie playing and rookie’s gentle snores.

“can i ask you something?” you say softly, turning to look at her. your voice is careful, not wanting to ruin the moment but needing to know.

lena glances at you, her eyes curious, a small smile playing on her lips. “of course.”

you take a breath, trying to find the right words. 

“why... why did you hate me so much before? back when we were... rivals, i guess. you were so... aggressive, and it always felt like you had something against me. but now you’re... different. so what changed?”

lena looks away, biting her lip like she’s trying to decide how much to say. the tension of the moment makes your chest tighten, but you wait, giving her time. 

after a long pause, she finally speaks.

“i never hated you like i said,” she admits quietly, her eyes focused on the christmas lights twinkling across the room. 

“i know it felt like that, but... it wasn’t hate. it was... god, it was the opposite, really. i talked to lea and jill a lot back then, when i was at wolfsburg, and... i didn’t know how to deal with how i felt about you.”

you tilt your head, furrowing your brow in confusion. “what do you mean?”

lena sighs, running a hand through her hair. “i... asked lea and jill for help. i didn’t know how to get your attention. it sounds stupid now, but... the only way i knew how was... being that way on the pitch. the aggression, the pushing—it was the only way i felt like i could have a piece of you.”

you blink, trying to process her words, the way they seem to pull back the curtain on everything you thought you knew. 

“so, what... you acted like that just to get me to pay attention to you?”

“yeah,” lena says, her voice softening as she looks back at you, meeting your eyes. 

“i was so focused on... being seen by you, even if it was just you being mad at me. it was selfish, and i’m sorry for all of it. it’s not fair that i treated you like that. i feel terrible about it actually”

you’re silent for a moment, and then you let out a soft laugh, shaking your head. “you know... we could’ve been friends from the start. we had so many mutual friends, lena. it’s not like you couldn’t have just... talked to me.”

lena’s smile turns sad, almost regretful. “but i never wanted to be just friends with you,” she says quietly, the words hanging in the air between you. 

“i always wanted more. that’s why... i couldn’t just be nice and friendly like everyone else. it didn’t feel like enough.”

you nod slowly, her words settling into you like the last piece of a puzzle finally clicking into place.

 it’s like understanding something you’ve been grappling with for so long. “i get that,” you whisper. “it was... a lot, though. for a long time, i didn’t know what to make of it. of you.”

“i know,” lena says, and she reaches out, her fingers brushing against your cheek as she tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. “but... i’m not that person anymore. i’ve changed. and i want to be better for you.”

you take a deep breath, feeling the weight of the past start to lift from your shoulders, piece by piece. you realize, in this quiet, cozy moment, that you’re ready to let it go. 

“i finally feel like... like i’ve gotten over the past,” you say softly, your voice steady as you look into her eyes. “and... i forgive you, lena.”

the words are like a release, freeing both of you from everything that came before. lena’s eyes soften, and without thinking, you lean in, pressing your lips to hers in a gentle, tentative kiss. 

it’s soft and sweet, like the world has slowed down around you. she holds your waist and lets you lay down on hers after you pull away. now you’re cuddling as rookie adjusted himself to sit on the other side of lena. 

“i think...” you whisper, smiling as you finally let yourself say it out loud. “i think i’m catching feelings for you, too.”

lena’s eyes light up, and she pulls you closer, her lips finding yours again, this time deeper, more certain. 

"merry christmas," lena whispers, pressing a gentle kiss to your temple after you pulled away again.

"merry christmas," you reply, snuggling into her warmth, knowing that things have totally changed for the better.

part three

[arieslost]

waking up from a nightmare, literally gasping for air and in seconds charles is by your side and holding you close. he’s whispering in your ear, trying to soothe you and is wiping your tears with his thumb bye i love my little precious leclerc

“my little precious leclerc” actually made me tear up i hope u know. i adore him

© arieslost 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.

wake me up | cl16

you wouldn’t call it a recurring nightmare. more like a nightmare that started one night, years ago, and kept getting worse and worse as time went on, layers of hurt and fear and heartbreak settling on top of each other every time your subconscious displayed it in all its horrid glory. you can’t even pinpoint what the worst part about it is anymore.

it used to be waking up alone. by yourself, in your pitch black room, was almost as bad as being asleep and experiencing the nightmare. there was never anything to distract you from the feeling of tears sliding down your cheeks, your heart still racing from fear, your eyes conjuring up flashes of the nightmare even though you were awake.

now it’s waking up next to charles, wanting to wake him up, desperately craving the comfort that only he can give you, but refusing to do so because of how hard he works. you won’t deprive him of his sleep, certainly not for something as trivial as a stupid nightmare. especially because he has trouble falling asleep most nights; always thinking about things he might have forgotten to do, his schedule for the next day, the next race weekend, when he can get you your all access pass.

you always tell him not to worry about you, that he has enough on his plate and you knew that when you said yes to being his girlfriend. this, your nightmare, is certainly much more trivial than making sure you have a paddock pass for a race weekend. this isn’t even real. it doesn’t matter.

so when you sleep horribly because of it, and charles notices (because of course he does), you just brush it off, saying you couldn’t get comfortable, you were too hot, too cold, whatever excuse you can think up on a whim.

“you should’ve woken me up, amore.” it’s what he says every. single. time.

and you know he means it. that he truly wants you to wake him up so he can care for you in whatever capacity he possibly can. you just can’t bring yourself to do it because of this.

this time, though, you don’t have a choice.

there’s another terrifying layer to your nightmare tonight. you’re lucid to some degree, enough to know that you should have the ability to wake yourself up from this subconscious plane, but you’re incapable of doing so. you tell your eyes to open, but they’re glued shut like they have to see this through to the end, even though you know how this ends.

you fight, and fight, and fight, until finally, your eyes fly open, tears flooding your vision and a ragged gasp tearing its way out of your throat as you scramble into an upright position. the commotion wakes charles immediately, and he doesn’t even ask what’s going on before he springs into action.

“breathe, baby,” he murmurs softly, gathering you into his arms. “listen to my heartbeat.”

you’re trembling, trying your hardest to calm down as you instantly melt into his embrace, his warmth spreading into your limbs and working to ease the tension you didn’t know they were holding.

“i-i—” you try to say, your mouth struggling to form the words.

“shh, it’s okay. i’ve got you, i’m right here.” he whispers, kissing your forehead and running his hands along the backs of your own.

“i’m sorry,” you say finally, nuzzling your face into his neck and breathing in his comforting scent.

“don’t apologize,” he replies firmly. “is this why you’ve been having trouble sleeping?”

you nod slowly, already knowing what he’s going to say next.

“why didn’t you ever wake me up?”

“i just...” you sigh, shifting closer to him and tilting your face towards him as he reaches to wipe your tears. “it’s stupid. i’ve been having this nightmare for years now, and it just keeps getting worse. this time, i couldn’t wake up. usually i just wake up and deal with it. you work so hard every day, and this really isn’t important—”

“i’m going to stop you right there, amore,” charles interrupts, cupping your face with both hands. “i don’t ever want you to say that anything you’re going through isn’t important.”

“but—”

“yes, i do work hard. i have a lot going on more often than not. but out of everything, i work hardest for this. us. do you know what the most important thing in my life is?”

“ferrari?” you answer immediately, only half joking.

“no, ma drôle de fille,” he laughs, “it’s you. i’m going to retire from racing one day, but i’m going to be with you until the day i die. and even after that.”

you feel yourself tearing up for a whole new reason.

“so don’t tell me that it’s not important,” he continues, leaning back into the pillows and bringing you with him. “if it’s bothering you, it bothers me too. you hear me?”

you nod.

“and you’ll wake me up next time?”

you nod again.

“good. now close your eyes. keep listening to my heartbeat. i’ll fight off the nightmares for you, okay amore?”

“you are so cheesy, cha,” you grumble, snuggling into his chest.

“shh, go to sleep,” he coos quietly, stifling a laugh as he pets your hair.

you shut your eyes dutifully, focusing in on the steady beat of his heart, the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest.

you dream of him.

word count: 907

masterlist — join my tag list here!

note: every charles leclerc request i get makes my heart soar because not only do i get to write about my favorite driver but i also get to improve on said writing THANK U ANON

ma drôle de fille = “my funny girl” (i hope)

my inbox is always open for comments, criticism, and conversation! feel free to pop in!

reblogs are always appreciated <33

dividers by @/saradika

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[dark-mnjiro]

kinktober 2024 [week two]

author’s note: I’m a day late because I just didn’t want to edit last night. I’m sorry. I hope you guys enjoy week two. As always, please check the content warnings!

content warnings: narumi gen x afab!reader, use of baby/girl/etc pet names, streamer!narumi, cock warming, voyeurism, exhibitionism, dubcon, public sex, teasing, explicit sexual content, doggystyle, hair pulling, spanking, cream pie, dirty talk

credits: divided by @/cafekitsune

Laying on the bed lazily, you scrolled on your phone as you could hear Narumi greeting his viewers for another gaming stream. It was his yearly Halloween twenty-four-hour stream. You pulled up his stream on your phone before his chat flooded with greetings to you - his now, long-time girlfriend.

“Babe,” you hear Narumi call out. “Everyone’s saying hi.”

You outstretched your arm and waved. Narumi kept the bed off-screen so you could relax in peace but you often would wave to his viewers or say (yell) from off camera. “Hi, guys! Happy Halloween!”

The chat exploded with well wishes from his viewers before they began flooding him with questions about bringing you out during a jump scare game. Pouting, you glanced at Narumi who sported a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“You know I hate jump scares!”

The corner of his mouth tugged into a smirk. “Exactly why you have to sit in on the game.”

You deflated immediately. “Ass…”

Narumi reached behind him before grasping your hand and squeezing you. “Please?”

Sighing, you offered a squeeze back. “Fine. You owe me!”

He chuckled. “Alright, alright. Anything you want after the stream then.”

“You better get me food.”

“Done.”

Shaking your head, you relaxed back on the bed as you watched the stream continue over the next couple of hours. You would comment randomly in the chat, encouraging the viewers to tease and scare your boyfriend with the donation sounds. He would occasionally glance back at you with a playful glare on his face.

“Babe?”

Glancing up from your phone, a smile curled over your lips. “Hm?”

“Ready to play?”

Groaning, you rolled off the bed. “FINE.”

He was an asshole. He has picked a game that capitalized on jump scares as he pulled you into his lap and the Five Nights at Freddy’s logo came up on screen. You took hold of the mouse and began to play.

Narumi’s hands found their place at your waist before resting his chin on your shoulder. His grip tightened with each involuntary jump you made.

“You good?”

He merely smiled at you. “I’m good,” he said before another jump scare flashed over the screen.

You yelped before Narumi’s grip rocked your body against his lap. Your cheeks reddened as you felt his erection pressing against you.

Muting the stream and pausing the game, you slipped off the headset before glancing at him. “Gen!”

A grin curled over his lips. “Yeah?”

“You know what!”

“Come on,” he snorted. “You know how bad I’ve always wanted to do this.”

The heat in your cheeks deepened. “Gen…”

“Baby… I promise they can’t see anything. Camera’s pointed from shoulders up.”

“One time. That’s it.” He assured you. “Just keep my dick warm…”

He merely grinned as you heard the meta clang of his belt undo. His hands slipped under your skirt before slipping the delicate fabric aside so he could slip his cock into you. “Now just sit on my cock pretty girl,” he whispered.

“Ass.”

“That can be arranged.”

“I’m going to break up with you.”

Narumi only laughed before adjusting his hips enough to push his cock into your further. Heat erupted throughout your body before slipping the headset back on and unmuting the stream. You apologized to the viewers mentioning that you two had to discuss a family matter from a nonexistent text you received.

His grip tightened on your hips as you continued playing the horrific game. You had to admit… knowing his cock was buried inside of you while you both gamed in front of thousands of viewers. It seemed to do something to you.

Heat rushed to your core with each adjustment you made or each jump you accidentally made. You heard Narumi grunting behind you, thoroughly enjoying himself as well.

Until a hand disappeared from your hip…

His hand slipped under your skirt before brushing against your clit. You managed to hold back the gasp that wanted to erupt from your throat at his touch. Electricity flooded your senses. What an asshole… Narumi began rubbing excruciatingly slow circles around your clit before he offered a small thrust.

The pace quickened.

Fuck… the heat between your legs radiated.

“That’s it,” Narumi cooed as the chat was led to believe he was complimenting your gaming. But you knew differently. He chuckled before pressing his lips against your shoulder. “See you’re doing fine.”

“Gen…” you warned.

He thrust into you again but disguised it as an adjustment.

A surprised gasp tumbled from your lips, thankfully as another jump scare flashed over the screen. His fingers pinched your clit, sending you over the edge as your orgasm washed over you.

Your body shuddered, making sure to keep your lips tightly together. Any illicit sound or moan would give away what you two were up to… and Narumi’s channel would pay dearly.

Your boyfriend only chuckled as he peered over your shoulder at his viewers. “I think we’re gonna let her take a break,” he commented. “And honestly I need a food break. I’ll be back in about fifteen or twenty minutes.” His stream muted and the screen switched to his break side.

“…did you want me to make you-“

With one swift motion, Narumi had you bent over his gaming desk with his cock still buried inside of your leaking cunt.

“Pretty baby,” he cooed. “Time to finish the job.”

A moan slipped past your lips as you felt his hips smack against your skin. Your hands found the edge of the desk, trying to brace yourself against it. His pace became increasingly rough before a free hand found its way into your hair.

“Sweet baby,” he grunted. As he tugged your hair back. “Loving every second of my cock in you with thousands watching. Does that get you off? You’re soaking wet… fucking dirty girl.”

You cried out his name as your orgasm began building up at your core. Another moan tumbled from your lips as he increased his pace.

Your mind couldn’t keep up.

“Gonna cum? I can feel you clenching baby…” he whispered before smacking your ass.

A yelp escaped your throat as you felt an orgasm finally crash over your body. Narumi continued his brutal as you tried to regain your senses.

“Gonna fill you up baby girl… you’re all mine,” he growled before spilling his cum inside of you. Another gasp moved past your lips at the sensation of your sensitive core filling up. He offered another hard thrust, pushing his seed further into you before finally pulling out.

Panting, you relaxed against the desk.

“You good princess?”

“Mhm…”

Narumi chuckled before glancing back at his stream.

“Oh fuck.”

Confusion filled your eyes. “What?”

“…I must have been too rough… I think we accidentally unmuted the stream.”

“WHAT?”

He rubbed the back of his head. “I think I’m on a twenty-four ban.”

“Gen!”

“…whoops. Let me message the site.”

[saritapaleo]

Archovember 2024 Day 26 - Compsognathus longipes

Before it was confirmed that birds were dinosaurs, Compsognathus longipes was regarded as the smallest dinosaur for decades. About the size of a chicken, its name means “elegant/refined/dainty jaw”. It lived in Late Jurassic Europe, found thus far in both Germany and France, with possible teeth also found in Portugal. It was carnivorous, and the remains of small lizards were found preserved in both fossil specimens. They were likely fast, scurrying animals, using their long tails for balance.

In the Late Jurassic, Europe was a dry, tropical archipelago at the edge of the prehistoric Tethys Sea. Both Compsognathus specimens were preserved within lagoons, possibly having died chasing lizards on the beach and then being swept out to sea in a flash flood. The German specimen is known from the Painten Formation, a part of the Solnhofen Limestone. The French specimen was found in limestone on the plateau of Canjuers. One of Compsognathus’ most famous contemporaries is the avialan Archaeopteryx, and the two may have competed over prey. It would have also lived alongside early pterosaurs like Propterodactylus, Rhamphorhynchus, and Anurognathus (as seen above). There were also a diverse variety of turtles, rhynchocephalians, and lizards living here as well, many of which served as prey for this tiny, catlike predator.

This art may be used for educational purposes, with credit, but please contact me first for permission before using my art. I would like to know where and how it is being used. If you don’t have something to add that was not already addressed in this caption, please do not repost this art. Thank you!

[tornadoquest]

Tornado Quest Top Science Links For August 24 - 31, 2024 #science #weather #climate #climatechange #hurricane #drought #heatsafety

Greetings everybody! Thanks so much for visiting. We’re reaching the peak season for hurricane potential and the Atlantic has a few areas of concern that are worth watching. While preparedness supplies are plentiful, now is the time to get prepared for a tropical storm or hurricane. I’ve plenty of hurricane preparedness information for you. I’ll also continue our overview of summer heat safety.…

[my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction]

More Than I Remember You [2]

Marc Spector x afab!Reader • Rating: 18+ pals Masterlist• ao3• want to be tagged? | request info • Kinktober 2024 Masterlist • Day 28: Face Sitting

Summary: Marc sees you again.

A/N: You don't have to have read the first part to read this, it's set (in a sort of AU) before the events of the series - Steven doesn’t know about Marc, but Marc knows about Steven. Reader is in a realtionship with Steven.

Thank you so much to @thexsanctuaryx for beta-ing so amazingly again!

Warnings: Oral sex (afab! receiving), kind of dubious concent because reader doesn't know that it's Marc, please let me know if I have missed a warning!

Word Count: 921

Marc’s in your kitchen, he recognises that much. The plants at the window, the colourful tea towels. 

Steven’s clothes are soft on his skin, they smell like your detergent. 

He pushes his hair back from his forehead and grabs Steven’s phone from the side, his hands are wet. Was he doing the washing up?

He wipes his hand on his jogging bottoms and checks the time 10:04am, Sunday. Okay. Marc double checks the date, Steven didn’t have work today. That was something at least. 

He frowns as he scrolls through the phone, looking over Steven’s calendar and-

“Steven?” 

He snaps to attention at the sound of your voice. This was the first time he’d seen you since, since…

He gives you a weak smile, trying to force his face into a more Steven like expression, relax his posture, slump his shoulders ever so slightly. 

The little frown that forms on your features is worrying, he swallows. 

“Hi, love.” He waves, the practised little Steven wave he’d mimicked a thousand times. 

Your frown deepens.

Oh fuck. That wave, that musical way he greeted you was for when he first sees you. He’s very obviously in your fucking kitchen in sleeping clothes. 

“I…” Marc tries. This isn’t fair, this shouldn’t be difficult. Why was it becoming so hard to be someone else when you were around? 

“Are you… okay?” You take a step forward and lightly touch his face. 

Marc manages to suppress the groan that wants to escape his chest, but only barely. He grabs your wrist, stopping your fingers from stroking against his skin.

Your eyes widen slightly, as if puzzle pieces were falling into place.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Wrong move, wrong move by a fucking mile. 

“Wh-”

He cuts you off with a kiss, desperately holding you close and praying to any god that will listen. 

You tense for a second before you relax into the embrace and flick your tongue over his bottom lip. 

Marc groans, relief flooding his veins. He opens his mouth eagerly, letting you slip inside as he tries to dig around in the back of his mind, to pull up Steven from wherever the hell he’s fallen back into. 

You moan lightly, wrapping your arms around him and digging your fingers into his sweatshirt, tugging him closer and, fuck. Marc’s cock twitches eagerly, remembering your mouth and the warmth of your pussy as you rode him.

He couldn’t do this again, couldn’t take more that wasn’t his. 

You pull back a fraction so you can kiss along his jaw, your hands run down his chest to his waistband. 

God, it would be so easy to fall back under the spell of your touch. 

He shakes his head and grabs your hands. 

You pull back, worry again flashing in your eyes. “Steven?” 

He doesn’t give you a chance to question, doesn’t give you a second longer to ruminate.

You let out a little yelp of surprise and then giggle as he practically throws himself to his knees and pulls down your pyjama bottoms and panties. He nips lightly at your thigh before he lays back and, holding your hips, urges you to follow him until his back is flat on the kitchen floor and your thighs are either side of his head. 

You giggle, “You could have just said-”

“Need you.” He mumbles, pressing you down while he cranes his head up at the same time and buries his face between your legs. 

You moan as the warmth of his mouth engulfs you and Marc wastes little time in licking up through your folds and to your clit. He sucks lightly, swallowing down his own cries of passion as your sweet taste hits his tongue. 

You roll gently, rocking against him. He can feel the tensing in your legs as he slides his hands up and over your skin, how you’re trying to keep your weight off him. That just wouldn’t fucking do. 

He growls softly, pushing you further down, needing you to practically suffocate him with your thighs.

You gasp, a sweet sound tumbling from your lips and going straight to his dick. You grab hold of the counter with one hand to keep your balance as he slides his hands up higher, caressing your waist and stomach and just brushing against your breasts. 

He rocks you against him, urging you to buck and take your pleasure from his mouth as he licks and sucks eagerly. 

You writhe, rutting and gasping as you sink deeper and deeper into the sensation, your eyes closing and back arching as your body takes over completely and starts to run purely on autopilot.

Pleasure burns along your skin, igniting your veins and tightening in your stomach. 

He gazes up at you with dark eyes, desperate to see you fall apart for him in ecstasy. For him. Just him. No one else. 

You cry out loudly, pulsing on his tongue as you come hard and fast, the pleasure washing over you like warm rain. You shiver, breathing hard as you slump back slightly. 

Marc moans weakly, hungrily drinking down your release before he helps you to sit back off him on the floor. 

You lean against the fridge for a moment, your mind still hazy from your orgasm. 

Marc can’t help himself, can stop the urge as he kisses your lips, your neck. Revelling in it when you reciprocate. He moves down, lower, spreading your thighs gently as he buries his head back in between them, where he belongs. 

Thank you for reading!

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