#flaming hot cheetos literally

[gremlinbabe]

I want all your ship names & best theories of how Malia and Parrish got together because I still got nothing 😭😂

(Just realized marrish is Martin x Parrish not Malia x Parrish)

And if we’re going by that would Pale be the ship name cuz Parrish x Hale? Or like Pate? Tarrish? Jordila? Maldan? Tatish? Mordan? Jaila? Flaming coyote? Hot Cheeto???

[live-laugh-legolas]

what are the spice tolerances of the fellowship? who snacks on ghost peppers without any reaction and who thinks black pepper is too spicy?

I was literally thinking about this the other day.

The Fellowship’s spice tolerance

Aragorn:

-He’s not great with spice

-He doesn’t get dramatic about it but his mouth is on fire

-The only reason he’s not great with spice is just not having it often

-He spends so much time in the wild; he’s not Sam who refuses to eat unseasoned food even in the middle of nowhere

-He is used to the blandest of bland food

-If he is served spicy food he will power through it because he’s too polite to ask for something else

Legolas:

-I will never give up my hc that he has literal grave mouth

-He will eat anything and be fine

-He might feel a bit of spice if he had a ghost pepper or something

-But he is less bothered by the spice and more just doesn’t get the point

-“why would I eat something that hurts?”

-He prefers to munch on poisonous berries he finds as they all walk that made Boromir have to shit every 15 minutes for a week

Gimli:

-I kinda wanted to say he isn’t good with spice because I could totally see him with the whole physical reaction to spice

-But he probably is the type to add hot sauce to literally everything

-So maybe he still gets real red and his nose runs

-But best believe he’s chowing down and having a great time

-Would risk his life for buffalo wings

Boromir:

-Surprisingly not bothered much

-Maybe not ghost peppers but normal to high levels of spice are fine

-However

-His mouth may be fine but his body is going to explode

-Don’t bother him about an hour later; he’s shitting literal fires of Mount Doom

-Send aid

-Never learns though and will continue to eat spicy food

Frodo

-It’s this one right here

-He’s the one who will munch on ghost peppers casually

-He likes the taste

-A ghost pepper is nothing to him

Sam:

-Not good with spice at all

-He gets all red in the face

-Nose running so much you would think the elvish river horses were coming

-He likes the taste; but he has a very strong reaction

-He would really like Flaming Hot Cheetos but it takes him a week to get through a whole bag

-And yes he’s crying the whole time but he won’t stop

Merry:

-He can tolerate a moderate amount of spice but he doesn’t really like it

-And I mean he doesn’t add spice to anything just for the sake of adding a kick

-He suffers through it a little but he does love Indian style food

-That shit rocks even if his mouth is starting to go numb

Pippin:

-I am indecisive about him

-On one hand I think he’s a sensitive little guy

-But he also loves to eat and won’t let some spice get in his way of a good meal

-So I’m going to rest on he is literally crying from the spice but won’t stop eating it; he’s hungry

-He won’t back down from being challenged to eat a ghost pepper

-Possibly needs medical assistance if he has too much spice

Gandalf:

-Nope

-Doesn’t even like mustard because he thinks that is too spicy

-Literally dies and comes back as a different version of Gandalf that’s how dramatic he is

-If it smells a little spicy he won’t even try it

[babyhatesreality]

hello hello! i hope you’re well!💕 imagine the following:

baby being a hot chip fiend.

the thought has not left me. i’m plagued with thoughts of it on the daily.😭

since katie cat is a modern little, the thought of her enjoying and munching away on takis or hot cheetos while steve and/or bucky just recoil at the spiciness of it just makes me laugh.

especially since steve and bucky were just raised in a completely different time, a stomachache waiting to happen for them, is literally just a casual little snack for her.😭💀

however, there’s also the possibility that at least one of them…bucky would like the spice.

OMG @spoopynortherndownwhore!! So this is hilarious for a multitude of reasons. The first being- I adore this idea and it makes me laugh so hard- you are a genius. Also I'm so sorry for the delay. The second- I am the absolute opposite of a hot chip fiend. Like some of the Taco Bell mild stuff is too much for me. So I have absolutely no idea how to write it because I am literally that person that get a whiff of a spicy scent and starts making faces like a two year old confronted with broccoli.

So all that being said....Imma make some stuff up because it makes me laugh and because you are amazing and I hope it makes you laugh!

This one time you were grocery shopping with Bucky, and a package of Flaming Cheetos caught your eye. You thought the cheetah with the fire behind him was pretty, so you asked if you could get it.

Bucky wasn't sure about this. "Baby, these are hot and spicy. I don't think you're gonna like 'em." But when your face crumpled with disappointment, of course he couldn't handle that. He tossed them right into the basket. "What the heck. Let's live a little."

Your cheering and giggles was all he needed to know it was the right move.

Once you got home, you were desperate to try them, but Bucky insisted on you eating a normal lunch first. Once you finished your pb&j and carrot sticks, you both decided to try them together.

At the first taste, your eyes widened from the burn, your nose wrinkled as it ran, and your tongue felt like it was on fire. And you liked it a lot. You didn't care for the burn, but once you got past that the taste was really good! You reached for another one, but your hand was intercepted.

Because Bucky, who had popped one in at the same time as you, was nearly gagging. He felt like his face was exploding, his guts were on fire, and he didn't even want to think about what was happening in his colon.

"Absolutely not," he wheezed at you, keeping a hold of your hand while snatching the bag. He put the offending fire chips from hell in the top cabinet above the fridge where you couldn't reach even with your step stool before grabbing the gallon of milk. He sloshed some into your glass quickly, before drinking straight from the jug himself.

Once he tamed the burn, he became aware that you were just watching him curiously, having not touched your milk at all.

"Didn't that burn?" Bucky asked, his voice still hoarse from the spice. You nodded.

"Yeah but it was fun!"

"FUN?!"

"Yup! Can I have another?"

"No, baby, I don't want it to hurt your tummy."

"Doesn't hurt!"

"It might not hurt now, but it'll hurt later. No more flaming hot cheetos."

"Dat's no fun."

"You'll thank me later."

"You didn't like dem, Daddy?"

"They're not gonna like ME, munchkin. Drink your milk please."

After you had obeyed and had a milk mustache, you tried again. "Dey didn't taste good to you?"

"They tasted fine, but that burn....yikes," Bucky mumbled as he wiped your face.

"I like da taste too!"

"The taste WAS good, but it's not worth it."

"Please, Daddy? Just one more?"

"Sorry Trouble, it's not happening again."

"But what if Papa like da taste? Can he has them?"

"Okay, now THAT'S a fun idea."

Later that night, Bucky had convinced Steve to try one, and relented on letting you have another- mostly so he could watch Steve's reaction to you having no reaction.

It went exactly how you think it would go.

Steve banned them from the house after watching you down three cheetos in a row in absolute horror.

When you asked what was going to happen to the rest of the cheetos since they weren't allowed in the house anymore, Bucky brushed it off, saying they'd take care of it.

What you didn't know, was after Steve had tucked you into your bed that night, he caught Bucky sneaking a handful of them in the kitchen pantry with a tub of ice cream next to him.

Bucky just blinked at him innocent. "Don't you judge me, Rogers."

"Fine, Barnes. But you either point your ass the other way in bed tonight, or you're sleeping on the couch."

[prettyguardian-sailorbiscuit]

RenGiyuu is a pretty underrated ship.

Literally a spicy sun with a calming moon.

The Red to one's Blue.

The Flaming Hot Cheetos to Cool Ranch Doritos.

Just a thought.

[ashdreams2023]

Idk if you still take any other characters for requests but if you have time also do a lucius malfoy hcs with a s/o who absolutely LOVES spicy food? They cant go one day with at least one snack/meal thats spicy (they like normal food too, the spicy ones is just more appealing to them) take your time ^^

Lucius Malfoy x reader who loves spicy food

Ok at first he didn’t think much of it, so what if you ask for chili flakes on some dishes or buy hot sauce every week because you use it on everything

Like ok, you want spicy ramen go ahead he’ll get sushi

Then he took a bite of your food once by accident and you were two seconds from floo calling snape for help

"How do you stomach this?!" "I just do!"

Literally watches you with both amusement and terry every time you get into one of your overlay spiced dishes

Lips red from sauce and not one drop of sweat, or runny nose, you looked completely fine

It has become such a common thing that the house elves now know how to make your food exactly like that each time

Sometimes he feels slightly bad when you two go out to eat and the options are just in normal level heat but you assure him that it’s completely fine

"It’s fine, plus there’s plenty of snacks at home"

Guilty of cringing at the muggle foods you bring with you when you go out shopping

"What’s that my love?" "Oh it’s a corn dog covered in hot flaming Cheetos, wanna try?"

Gets considered for your stomach a lot of times, especially if you get stomachaches which was a rare event

"You carry hot sauce with you?!" "What? You can never be overly prepared"

He may have a low tolerance for spice but he does like the tingle feeling on his lips when he kisses you after a meal

The way he had eaten way too much Asians food since he met you because of the spice ranges

"Hey I think you can handle spice much better now!" "Not as good as you my love"

[maypiles]

OMG 😱

Found your Jackson Wang reading through hashtags *chefs kiss* 👌 Could u please do a similar reading for NCT Taeyong? His love life? Thank you so much 🙏💓

Ohhhh my god, y’all are really out here summoning me to dive into the personal lives of K-pop royalty AGAIN???" 😭💕 First of all, anon, THANK YOU for finding my Jackson Wang reading through the hashtags and for the chef’s kiss appreciation. That was a whole spiritual novella, and now you’re asking for Taeyong’s love life? ICONIC TASTE. 👌(No cap idk who is that Taeyang yet but I feel it in my bones. ICONIC NONETHELESS) You’re giving me homework, and I love it. Let me light my candles, shuffle my cards, and prepare for whatever chaos spirit decides to drop on me. But like… warning: if this turns into another “secret marriage, betrayal, crying on balconies in Thailand” situation, I’m gonna need a moment to recover. 😩🔥 Stay tuned, babe. Spirit and I are about to serve up some piping hot tea. Let’s see what the cards have to say about your boy Taeyong. 👀✨

🌊🌻TAEYONG'S LOVE LIFE 2025💛☀️

ALRIGHT, BUCKLE UP, PEOPLE, BECAUSE THIS IS ABOUT TO BE A WILD RIDE. We’re diving into NCT Taeyong’s love life for 2025, and let me tell you, his energy? CHAOTICALLY HILARIOUS. This man is out here single as hell ASF but giving "I’m trying, okay?!" vibes, and SPIRIT IS NOT LETTING HIM REST.

🌅🌅🌅🌅

SHUFFLING ENERGY:

First off, as soon as I shuffled the cards, I literally snorted. Spirit straight-up said, "IF HE EVEN HAS A LOVE LIFE." 💀💀 I mean, poor Taeyong is out here scheming like the world’s most timid mastermind, terrified of rejection and past heartbreaks, but also low-key ready to be someone’s romantic knight in shining armor. LIKE SIR, PICK A STRUGGLE. I saw the Five of Cups flash and immediately saw Taeyang standing in front of a seraphim angel (hmm so random.. DON'T JUDGE) and heard, “Shall not fret!” Spirit’s out here acting like his life coach, pushing him to grow a pair (Courage! Boldness! Step up, King!), but he’s out here overthinking.

💛💛💛💛

THIS MAN IS SUCH A ROMANTIC. He’s probably listening to love songs, getting all in his feelings, and I wouldn’t be shocked if Flaming Hot Cheetos by Clairo is on repeat. The lyrics scream "crush phase," and honestly, that’s the vibe. He’s sitting there like, “What if I just… upgraded my love life?” (LMFAO why do I keep thinking about video games? Is he a gamer or into gaming by any chance?) but also dying at the thought of making the first move. Spirit’s like, “TAKE THE CHANCE, BABE. STOP HIDING.”

☀️☀️☀️☀️

CARDS PULLED:

Let’s get to it: World, Ten of Pentacles reversed, Hermit (no kidding), Ace of Wands, Moon reversed, Ten of Swords (ouch), Two of Cups (ooooh), Nine of Wands (the struggle), Queen of Wands reversed (tea?), Chariot reversed (you ain’t going nowhere, King), Six of Cups (nostalgia, much?), Nine of Cups reversed (boohoo vibes), Seven of Swords reversed (spill the truth), Page of Cups (puppy love), Devil (spicy), Ace of Cups (OMG new beginnings?!), Knight of Cups (man’s about to risk it all), Knight of Wands (he’s TRYING, okay?!), and Judgment (this card wouldn’t leave my mind!).

BOTTOM: Justice (karma’s working overtime).

SPLITS: Empress (divine feminine vibes), Emperor (okay, soulmate energy?!), and Six of Pentacles (balance it out, babe).

🌊🌊🌊🌊

THE TEA™:

First of all, this man is hilariously, miserably single right now. He’s in hermit mode, probably journaling and making Pinterest boards about “the love life I deserve.” BUT THEN. THEN. Something sparks in 2025 (Ace of Wands), and it’s like he’s ready to shoot his shot. And guess what? It’s not some random fling—it’s real. Like soulmate potential (Two of Cups). BUT he’s terrified of rejection, of messing up things because that's literally what I heard spirit saying (Five of Cups, Nine of Wands), so he’s overthinking it to death. Taeyong, babe, TAKE A BREATH.

Spirit showed me this blond-haired masculine (which turned out to look 90% like him, BTW. Yes, ik ik I'm that gifted) on some small deserted island during what looks like a reality show??? Imagine gravel, sand, bright weather, and a random banner as tho some sort of a reality show (are we on "Two Days, One Night" vibes or something?). He’s laughing awkwardly, super embarrassed, because the manager said something hilarious. It’s playful, lighthearted, and low-key adorable.

✨✨✨✨

HIS ENERGY:

Y’all, Taeyong’s energy is SO FUNNY and infectiously playful. Like, if this guy is actually this goofy and fun, then this reading SCREAMS accuracy. He’s not just out here “finding love”; he’s doing it with childlike wonder. Spirit’s like, “It’s safe for you to love! Open up, babe!” but also karmic lessons everywhere. Whatever he’s stepping into romantically? It’s about learning, healing, and GROWTH.

🌟🌟🌟🌟

ORACLE CARDS:

This Could Be the One: Spirit is hinting that he’s already met someone who’s The Real Deal™.

Honeymoon: Are they going to meet during a holiday?! THAT ISLAND Y'ALL??! Or is there a dreamy vacation vibe coming?

Playfulness: Like I said, his energy is hilarious and adorable—he’s learning to embrace this lighthearted side because Spirit is URGING him to.

New Love: Spirit says YES to something fresh.

Romantic Feelings: Baby boy’s catching the feels, and it’s so CUTE.

Karmic Lessons, Forgiving, and Learning: Look, this is about healing from his past and stepping into something REAL.

🐠🐬🐠🐬

WHY THIS IS SO SWEET:

Spirit is gently bullying him to open his heart. He’s terrified of past mistakes (Five of Cups, Nine Swords), but this is his karmic lesson: to take a risk. And OMG, the energy of first-stage love. You know that fuzzy, giggly feeling when it’s all butterflies and stolen glances? YEAH, THAT. He’s dipping his toes into romance but probably panicking because its genuineness is so unfamiliar.

🐚🐚🐚🐚

WILD SYNCHRONICITY:

Also, can we talk about how Spirit literally showed me this blond dude in a white hoodie on an island, and it turned out to look exactly like him?! HELLO??? This isn’t even shocking anymore—I once sketched Fyodor Dostoevsky before knowing what he looked like BUT TURNED OUT I ACTUALLY SKETCHED HIM WITH A LETHAL ACCURACY (that was years before I got into spirituality and discovered my gifts), so yeah, my channeling skills are THAT girl. But still, this was wild.

🍨🍨🍨🍨

FINAL NOTES:

Taeyong’s energy is pure chaos but in the best way.

He’s ready to take a leap into love but needs to get over his fears first.

The connection feels karmic and healing, but also sweet and lighthearted.

This reading feels hilariously accurate because of how playful and funny his vibe is. HE'S SUCH A SUNSHINE!

Spirit’s like, “Take a chance, babe—it’s safe for you to love.”

So yeah, 2025 is giving “funny romance with soulmate vibes.” We’re rooting for you, Taeyong! GO GET THAT LOVE! 💖💖

(btw why is the reading so bright I'm not built for this palette but Taeyang's energy is taking over HELP-

OMG ANON LISTEN!!! 😭😭😭 So here’s the tea: I am definitely gonna check this NCT Taeyong out because HIS ENERGY??? UNHINGEDLY HILARIOUS AND HEARTWARMING. Is he an enfp?? Like, Spirit literally hit me with the giggle stick while channeling his love life, and I’m sitting here wondering HOW IS THIS MAN SO ENDLESSLY CHAOTIC AND ENDEARING AT THE SAME TIME???

I left K-pop behind like a distant relic of my youth, years ago, completely dusted and done. BUT THIS ENERGY??? I’m terrified I’m gonna Stan him soon. My retirement from the K-pop world might be OVER. 😭😭💕

Anon, if this reading is as accurate as it feels, I’m about to become his No. 1 fan. HOW IS THIS REAL?? Like, send prayers because I can already hear “Stan Taeyong” whispering in my subconscious. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! 😭😭😭💓

HOLY MOTHER OF EVERYTHING THATS UNDER THE HEAVENS 😭😭😭😭😭😭 Okay, like, hear me out—I CANNOT WITH THIS!!! NO WAY this reading isn’t the most accurate thing ever because what?? WHAT?!?! I literally went on Pinterest, right, just to get some pics of this Taeyong from NCT for the Tumblr post. AND THEN I SEE IT. I see it!!! HE HAS TATTOOS AND ONE LOOKS LIKE AN ANGEL??? 😱 EXCUSE ME, WHAT?? Is this why I literally channeled this guy earlier standing in front of a SERAPHIM ANGEL bathed in golden light, and this angel was telling him “You shall not fret”???? I’m absolutely screaming right now. Like, seriously—how is that a coincidence??? THAT'S DIVINE GUIDANCE, PROTECTION, AND BLESSINGS. BUT WAIT, there’s more. I found PICTURES of this Taeyong with blond hair, on an island, in the brightest of sunlight, wearing WHITE SHORTS. (Okay, close enough. Very close, Spirit. I see you.) AND THEN—AND THEN—out of nowhere, KRIS WU FLASHES in my mind’s eye, and I’m like “huh, that’s random, who cares??” But NO—turns out Taeyong’s in SUPERM, which has EXO MEMBERS, and I used to LOVE Kris Wu back in the day, so I’m like, WAIT A SECOND, IS SPIRIT TRYING TO TELL ME TAEYONG IS INVOLVED IN SOME WAY WITH EXO??? What’s happening right now, because this is CRAZY???!!! Like seriously, I'm SHOOOOCKED 😭😭😭. Spirit literally knows exactly what it's doing, and I’m here about to become a full-blown Taeyong stan at this point, like there’s no going back now. This is absolutely mind-blowing. I’m so shook I can't even breathe.

The umpteenth edit before posting:

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 😭😭😭😭😭 WHAT?? NO. THERE'S NO WAY!! So I’m over here, right, I found this pic of Taeyong's tattoos—literally DROPPED MY JAW, because I’m over here trying to connect it with the whole seraphim angel I channeled earlier. And then I literally look at the COMMENTS on the pic, AND WHAT DO I SEE?? A FREAKING 111 in the comments!! 😱 LIKE WHAT??? WHAT??? HOW IS THIS EVEN REAL?? 111, the angel number, like this was the universe giving me a freaking confirmation that everything I was channeling was spot-on? I’m literally losing my mind right now. I'm over here connecting dots I didn’t even know needed to be connected, and spirit is just THROWING signs at me like “Here, have this, and this, and this!” I'm screaming, I’m laughing, I can’t even—SPIRIT KNOWS WHAT IT’S DOING!!! 😭😭😭 I cannot. This reading is like a whole divine conspiracy happening right before my eyes, and I’m just HERE for it. There's no way in hell this is a coincidence. NO WAY.

It's official: I WILL NEVER RECOVER—

*dies*

[chiquititaosita]

hange y novia de mexicana

synopsis: Hange and a mexicana novia headcanons part 2

Osita note: hange is given gender neutral pronouns, mentions of erueri (idk how to say it lmao), Mexican culture, Mexican slang, also some baddie shit lol A LITTLE BIT OF NSFW(car sex, food play), generational trauma. Tias being exposed.

It’s their funeral again, but anyways here’s my lovely moots tag list @emomanswhore @roronoaswifey @roronoacherries @sanjis-all-blue @sanjisblackasswife @euphofic @noawithlove @luffyinlove @hqkalon @yourrfavzxri @abbyslev @hangespublicist @hangeslovers-world @azelmawrites @jujuyii @honeybleed @backwzzds @neptunes1nterweb @theemrsjaeger @chrollohearttags @cottonconnielvr @ginger4sugar @mommypieck @usopps-devotee @punktastics @kazushawty @etherealxmaya @forever-rogue @prncssmimi

- y/n is majorly a chismosa and so is hange

- they’re gonna fuck you the minute y’all leave from having dinner with your family in their damn car. “Does that feel good??” They’re gonna whisper in your ear as they’re in the drivers seat rubbing your clit as you nod whimpering yes.

- always touching your thighs!! NO REASON

- loves your kisses, and they love your physical touch. Always craving to touch you and to be close to you.

-they buy you pan dulce every time you come over. Because they know how much you crave for it.

- “hey!! I have this for you!!” They give you a bag of flaming hot cheetos with lime, slices in a bag. When you’re on your period. you just fry and hug them!!

- “hey do you wanna come over??”

- “I cant.”

-“why??”

-“my mom said I went out already three times today.” Which is translating that you need to come over this time. And they do.

-hange would be sooo confused the first time their gf says that but they get the hang of stuff quickly fs 😭

- when you do your thing and holding Hanges hand it’s adorable like yes. “Idc if we’re going out we’re holding hands the whole. damn. Time.”

-“that’s fine by me!-“ Hange is literally such a happy partner fr. They just love to be around you.

-Hange learns to keep extra grocery bags, when you notice this you’re like.. 😀😀

-“where did my partner go!?” You’re shook and pretty sure hallucinating.

-the minute at a carne asada when a new baby is born EVERYONES taking the baby. Even HANGE

-“mija when are you and Hange getting married?” hange tried to answer as they get cut off by y/ns tias.

-“CALLATE PUTAAAA!!” A drunk hange would say, when you’re out of the carne asada!! Walking into the car.

-“y/n don’t worry it’s okay.” Hange doesnt need you to stand up for themselves, but because it’s your family, if they misgendered hange on purpose you’re going a-wall on them

-“ no!! I am not letting you get disrespected! I have had enough of their bullshit and listened to them for TEN YEARS” You’d be pissed and established a fucking boundary between a group of your tias about hange and yourself as a couple, in general because those tias criticize every fucking thing.the minute they try to pick you up to calm down.

-you told and gave them that Latina stare. “Sit down.” They sat down instantly with your dad as they both cracked open a beer.

-“That’s why you can’t keep a man!! Because you got La pescado panocha!! You’re an alcoholic who has severe daddy issues, And you!! YOU DONT EVEN HAVE YOUR FUCKING PAPERS!! YOU FUCKING BORDER HOPPER HOMIE HOPPING ASS COCHINA!!”. They left within five minutes.

-“AND COME BACK WHEN YOU CAN HAVE PROPER ENGLISH!!” Hange just sits there and actually felt thankful that you didn’t have to do that but they are thankful. You’re a short chihuahua with a 6’5 Great Dane mindset.

- they obviously eat the FUCK OUT OF POZOLE!!

- and they love your cooking. “Oh mah god..” they’ll cover their mouth when they taste nopales for the very first time and they’re in love.

-even eating ramen noodles the Mexican way with tapatío or Valentina, lime juice and chilé powder. Mhm yummyyy!!

-now if you and Hange are in the car. You’re screaming in the car. They’re screaming bad bunny with you. Because yes!

-now when y’all live together. You’re the clingiest mf out there.

-“it’s bc of that chorizo!!!” Hange didn’t even know what that meant until they asked Connie, which instantly clicked into Hanges mind being the strap on!! ding ding ding!!’

-always satisfies your period cravings fr.

-“y/n HOW ARE YOU NOT BALD!?!?” This is Hange saying this as they get out of the shower using the drainage hair catcher and yes HISPANICS SHED A LOT OF FUCKING HAIR.

-“I don’t know genetics I guess.”

- sucks the chamoy and tajin off your Chi Chis

-when you told hange you eat pomegranates with tajin and chamoy They’re in shock. They’re gonna get you pregnant for sure!

-parent hange with mexicana mommy reader coming soon??!!?

- cooking with hange is intimate as well, because they’re always hugging you from behind leaving small kisses and love bites all over to label you as theirs.

- even hange drinking an agua fresca,their favorite would be mango for sure.

-even the grapefruit soda squirt they’re gonna buy so many cans of it.

- hange gets the hang of it, when going to a carne asada that Mexicans open their beers or soda bottles with just about ANYTHING AND EVERHTHING! from a kids toy to someone’s ass, or even a chair. It’s very rare to use a bottle opener. That’s what Hange brings a knife and a bottle opener.

-they love your Spanglish or. “AHH SANNAOFABISSHH!”

-they eat the chicken and cheese quesadillas you make in the fridge as a late night snack by reheating them in the microwave.

-one day you were sick and you wanted caldo de res . This mf called your abuela and ASKED THEM HOW TO MAKE IT EXACTLY AS IF ABUELA WAS THERE.

-“You made it for mee???” You’re tearing up with the rice and corn inside of the soup bowl along with the chicken. As you were on your period crying

-Now Hanges spice tolerance is manageable. But when you make them have anything they’ll slowly become immune to spicy things and love it. (They’re not spice god on tiktok okay.) but they’re an enthusiast.

-absolutely loves to spend time with you even if you’re always at home. They don’t care they’ll bring the fun to you!

-that’s why when y’all build blanket forts sometimes it heals both of your inner child together

-this also includes going to the grocery store at 3 o’clock in the morning to try some Mexican tiktok snacks or to have a day and y’all treat y’all’s selves on date night.

-and they kiss your lonjas (tummy rolls, this includes stretch marks and lunares)

-“dame un beso.” You’ll tell them and they’ll do it as you lean in. “Did you say give me a kiss?”

[9i9i-etc]

ate some flaming hot cheetos today what the actual fuck are y'all americans consuming i couldn't continue after idk 1 serving it tastes ass and has so much colouring 😭??? there's literally no point, anyone that's studied basic science wouldn't think colour= yummy; stopped a binge but it made my stomach so weird

wanted to throw the whole thing away but my non disordered gym bro brother wanted it shit was so expensive too perks of living in a third world country ig

spilled a lil abt my personal life but wtvr now y'all r forced to learn abt me hehe ):) love y'all!!

[w3ath3r-0f-sw34t3rz]

forcing myself to pick a top five (in no particular order except for no. 1) for my favorite artists. why? because!

top five edition because these were the artists who i'm not literate enough in, or who don't have enough, or whatever enough for the top ten. and because the other one was too long

madilyn mei

side quest song

partner in crime

the brink

at the cemetery

tho i'm a tortoise

mxmtoon

the idea of you

i hate texas

hong kong

almost home

cliché

ricky montgomery

my heart is buried in venice

talk to you

reptilia

line without a hook

black fins

the regrettes

monday

i love us

rosy

dummy

shapeshifter

jazmin bean

carnage

black dress

little lamb

it's not my fault (it's yours)

hello kitty

addison grace

everybody seems to love you

pessimistic

out of touch

slime!

kill the switch

destroy boys

drink

american river

i threw glass at my friend's eyes and now i'm on probation

crybaby

escape

clairo

bubble gum

bags

flaming hot cheetos

b.o.m.d.

how - demo

girl in red

rue

serotonin

watch you sleep.

you stupid bitch

we fell in love in october

lovejoy

it's golden hour somewhere

concrete

perfume

taunt

sex sells

mac demarco

watching him fade away

heart to heart

for the first time

my kind of woman

blue boy

jack stauber's micropop

pearls

fighter

choice

blood pump

cupid

frankie cosmos

sappho

rings (on a tree)

outside with the cuties

my i love you

fool

thank you for your time

[autisticempathydaemon]

Hello hello! I would love a matchup!

What song are you fixated on at the moment? What lyric or verse, and why? - Playing with Bad Luck by Set it Off ... Its a kinda day/ its a kinda week/ Its a kinda year/ When you cut and paste/ When you're on your knees/ When you're out of tears (damn)/ examine every scar. i'm auditing my karma/ something just ain't adding up/ it's close, but no cigar/ i'm dancing in the dark cause/ every light keeps shutting off/ i'm playing with bad luck

What is your Enneagram type? - I'm an 8w7! also an ISFJ personality type

Tell me about your childhood imaginary friend.- I created a lot of stories and characters as a kid, most of them were knights or huge creatures

What is your go-to way to fall asleep? - I usually have a cup of tea and sit with my dog. On nights where I can't get my brain to shut up I'll play audiobooks/redacted sleep aid lol

What is your favorite of Redacted’s audios, and why? - Okay but something about the comfort/ reverse comfort audios hit a place in my heart I didn't think was in me. Like, I get why I like the healing audio cause the listener is getting doted on, and that's cute. (No matter how many times I listen to Gavin's comfort audios I will sob every time) But when I listen to a reverse comfort, it makes me love a character even more. Like the fact that they trust their listener (i.e., David breaking down, Gavin giving bits and pieces of his past to freelancer/ breaking down in the inversion, Milo injured, etc), makes my heart swell.

What Redacted boy holds no appeal to you, and why? Like, not the one you hate but the one who you don’t get the hype for. (I won’t judge, I promise.) - Okay, the character is made for the audience to not really like them, but Marcus (Project Meridian) sets a wave of anger in me I could never begin to explain like the manipulation tactics and gaslighting make me want to murder someone, BUT SOMEHOW IM LIKE "Oh I like Vega" which don't get me wrong also hate Vega at times but the way he acts with warden makes me love him

Tell me about that one book/movie/TV show you know all the words to. - does Redacted count "just gotta say ding dong the witch is dead fucking goes off and you better promise to play that at my funeral ALSO unrelated macho man unironically fucking goes off AND YOU KNOW WHAT actually IT IS related because you absolutely need to promise to play that at my funeral too back to back Macho man immediately followed by ding dong the witch is dead what do you say?" .... don't ask BUT IF NOT I also know pirates of the caribbean, the Grinch (live action), Mitchells vs the machines, Monty Python and the holy grail, too name a few

Which Redacted boy are you platonically attracted to? Like- forget dating, which dude do you want to be your best friend? - OH MY GOD CAN VINCENT BE MY BESTIE (obvi also love ash and guy but let me explain) Okay vincent is one of those guys who's sarcasm is top notch like homie could roast anyone without a second to waste. Also I feel like I could literally sit in silence with Vincent and it not feel awkward yknow

Do you have a go-to thing you ramble about when you’re tired, and if so, what is it? (For example, my boyfriend knows I’m ready to sleep when I start talking about space.) okay, I will ramble about history like there is no tomorrow. for example, did you know that Constantine the Great considered himself such a great Christian that he called himself the "13th Apostle" on his tomb (which very few people have been able to see because you have to be closely enough related to him to enter) he didn't write his name on his coffin instead it says 13th apostle also he put the remains of the other apostles in his tomb because "he deserved it" ......anywayssss

Tell me your go-to gas station and drink combo. - flaming hot Cheetos and a sprite reset my life in a way that makes me want to achieve my dreams

Tell me about your favorite playlist at the moment. - The Balance, its so beautifully made, starting with a close experience to death, to cult antics, to AN UNEXPECTED CROSSOVER. its just made sooooooooooooo well

What’s your guilty pleasure in media, and why? - Okay cringy middle school emo/ animatic music from my past is engrained into my brain

And whatever else you think tells me about who you are! - i'm 5'2 and the youngest of a big family. I'm an artist and currently working on an illustration degree. I love love love voice acting. Thats about it! THANKS

You gave me so much to work with here, and yet it was a challenge. Like, I could have gone in so many directions. I think you could work so well with so many of the boys, but ultimately, it had to be Asher.

Your submission gives me the vibe of someone who’s loyal, unique, and confident, who knows what they’re about and always has something interesting to say even if you’re not particularly extroverted. I like the idea of pairing Asher with you because he would perfectly uplift you, pulling you out of your shell and giving you the stage to shine while also knowing when to take the reins and support you, in your education, social situations, whenever.

Your life would be so genuinely fun together- not just because Asher’s so fun as a dude but because y’all have so much in common. You two would have the same taste in music (that FOB fan boy) and pop culture. You’d be the tea drinker to his Monster Energy vibes, the perfect balance in the house to feed his bubbly nature but also ground him. Also, Asher should totally have a dog he can play with, so it’s even more perfect.

Song:

If you don't swim, you'll drown/ But don't move, honey/ You look so perfect standing there/ In my American Apparel underwear/ And I know now, that I'm so down/ Your lipstick stain is a work of arts I got your name tattooed in an arrow heart/ And I know now, that I'm so down

5SOS seems like just the sort of group y’all and Asher would like now, the group that was pop-punk adjacent and has evolved with its audience. This track in particular is a classic, and I can see Asher totally jamming out to this in the car, air-guitaring at red lights, and demanding applause from you when he’s done (which you’d give because he’s just that cute).

Runner-Ups:

Like I said, there were so many boys that could have been matched with you, so there were also too many options for runner-ups! I settled on Anton because he’d be so cute with a tea-drinking dog lover. He deserves a puppy and a partner who makes them a pot to share. I also like you with Guy because an artist and writer couple is just too cute to pass up.

note: thank you for waiting 🖤

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[fortpeat]

Get to know me ✨

Thank you baby @mbjw for this tag 🥰🥰🥰 I loved doing this 💙🫂💙🫂

Do you make your bed? Nope 🫣🫣 sometimes when I feeling it I do but other times just no 🫣🫠 but when I change the sheets I make it all meat and tidy otherwise it's a mess...I am at the top bunk bed so the fact that I have to climb up again to make it makes the need even less so 😁

What’s your favorite number? 5 - I don't know why tbh it's just 5 🤷🏻‍♀️

What is your job? I finalllyyyy after literal years of job searching got a job as a Graphic designer 🥺🥺 so I am happy with that even though the work hours are crazy 🫣 so my presence in here is gonna be way less 😭😭😭 which I miss like crazyyy

If you could go back to school, would you? School tbh no .... I have had lots and lots of fun in school but everyone I knew then even my best friends are all distanced from me and I don't like the person I was then. But university hell yeah .... Remove the study part I would love to hang out in my university

Can you parallel park? Nope... I used to ..hell it was the one I had to demonstrate for my parking test but now I suck at parking 🫣🫣🫠

A job you had that might surprise people? I had a one day job with my extended family as an assistant to a cook 😂 making desserts for a function..it was very hands on experience 🤭 I even got paid for it

Do you think aliens are real? Yup.. there are the good ones and the bad ones hopefully we humans leave them alone so they can leave us alone as well 🫣🫠

Can you drive a manual car? nope..my brain is not that developed to handle a manual and to remember all of that technicalities 🫠🫠

What’s your guilty pleasure? Hot flaming Cheetos and donuts 🫣🫣 I love those so so much.... I don't have them often but when I do it instantly vanishes 🤭

Tattoos? None I would like to have a teeny tiny one tho ...maybe one day

Favorite color? Black, Blue , Red and white 😁

Favorite type of music? I usually like soft songs like melodies but I have been dipping my toes more and more into Kpop since my Blu has been suggesting a lot ☺️😁

Do you like puzzles? Yes I do.. puzzles help with quieting my thoughts and my anxiety by being in the present.

Any phobias? I don't know... I have a fear of horror movies can that count 😂 I will avoid horror movies at all costs 🫣 life is scary enough I don't need to add more into it

Favorite childhood sport? I liked Throwball I was there in the school team 😁 even got the championship for it and I love badminton 😁 and when I was a kid I used to watch WWE 🫣 ... This is what happens when you are the only girl among 4 brothers (cousins included)

Do you talk to yourself? Hell yeah ! That's like my main hobby 🫣 I talk to myself, I write to myself ... I am my biggest company 😂

What movies do you adore? I adoreee action thriller movies 😁 murder mysteries ... All marvel movies and I love animated movies as well...mainly the Pixar ones tho 🫣

Coffee or Tea? Both.. I have been halving coffee a lot recently 😁

First thing you wanted to be growing up? Doctor I think... Then it became a teacher and now I am neither of those 🤣

Not specifically tagging anyone but if anyone wants to join you are always welcome 🥰

[funnyfooddatabase]

Roy Choi’s The Cheetos Flamin’ Hot Spot Menu

Food AND Drink

Type of Funny Food: Event

Introduced: September 2019

Location: Flamin’ Hot Spot, Los Angeles, CA

Born out of a collaboration with LA chef Roy Choi, the Cheetos Flamin’ Hot Spot was exactly as advertised- a pop-up restaurant with a menu featuring Flamin’ Hot Cheetos-based items. 

The food included:

the Flamin’ Hot Elotes, buttered corn covered in Flamin’ Hot Cheetos Puffs and White Cheddar Cheetos Puffs, 

Cheetos Sweet n’ Spicy Chili Meatballs, Xxtra Flamin’ Hot Cheetos-infused pork and beef meatballs covered with a powder of Xxtra Flamin’ Hot Cheetos and sitting atop a layer of sweet and spicy chili sauce,

Flamin’ Hot Chipotle Ranch Wings, sweet and spicy chili sauce-covered chicken wings covered in Flamin’ Hot Chipotle Ranch Cheetos dust,

Xxtra Flamin’ Hot Rice Bowl, marinated broccoli or grilled chicken mixed with rice, cilantro, chili sour cream sauce, sesame seeds, and Xxtra Flamin’ Hot Cheetos dust, 

Flamin’ Hot Fries, regular (or Flamin’ Hot) Cheetos drizzled with melted cheese, sesame seeds, cilantro, and chili sour cream sauce,

the Hot Cheetos Burrito, an avocado or short rib burrito with “cheese”, “more cheese”, chili sour cream sauce, and Flamin’ Hot Cheetos,

the Five-Alarm Cheetos Steak, a literally flaming Cheddar Jalapeno Cheetos-seasoned 8oz ribeye steak with a side of cheesy rice.

Cheetos Sweetos Hot Cakes, Caramel Sweetos pancakes covered in extra Sweetos, chocolate sprinkles, and whipped cream,

and Chester Cheetah’s Cheeto Churros, churros made of fried pound cake covered in Simply White Cheddar Cheetos dust, sugar, whipped cream, and caramel. 

Meanwhile, the themed drinks available were: 

the “Hot” Chocolate Shake, a chocolate ice cream milkshake with crushed Flamin’ Hot Cheetos and raspberries (and garnished with more of the same),

and the cocktails, whose existing images are unfortunately impossible to discern given the warm lighting in the venue and the variety of glasses utilized:

Heat Control, white rum mixed with Crystal Pepsi, coconut water, and citric acid,

The Bubly Hydrant, bourbon with Applebubly, apple cider, and an apple slice,

the Fire Extinguisher, tequila with Grapefruitbubly, grapefruit juice, lime juice, orange liqueur, and a lime garnish,

Cool Off, Hot Stuff, Nolet’s Gin, simple syrup, lemon juice, and jalapeno and cucumber slices,

The Fizzy Spice Fix, Belvedere vodka with prosecco and honeydew shrub

The Spiced Kick, spiced rum with Pepsi and lime,

and Infuego, Bulleit Rye whiskey and Kentucky bourbon with orange and angostura bitters and sugar cube.

[sapphic-lottienat]

tagged by @memberoflottiescult to share 5 songs ive been listening to recently!!

holy ground by taylor swift. i literally am obsessed with this song its js so happy and dancey and sweet and its just really really fun

pretty girls by renee rapp. im love her so much and the chorus of this song is so addictive omg

renegade by big red machine. technically a taylor swift song but completely different from her normal vibe and it sounds rlly cool so yea!

flaming hot cheetos by clairo. i absolutely adore clairo's music and this song is just so sweet and chill and hopeless romantic vibes which is unfortunately me right now

she's always a woman by billy joel. not my usual song choice but my sister brought it up as one of her favourite songs and i miss her loads right now so its just cool to listen to and think of her!!

tagging: @sickly-stitches @ohbrightnewday @antlerslayer and whoever else wants to join bc im too tired to think of anyone else!!

[abiiors]

literally fuck normal song titles. i want early 2000’s emo and midwest emo titles from now on. so when people ask me my favorite song it’s completely normal for me to respond with something like “i ate the pope he tasted like smoke” or “flaming hot cheetos bag in a costco at 2 am” and not be looked at like im insane

and like i would fucking love a song that has the same vibes as flaming hot cheetos bag in a costco at 2 am!!!

fuck regular names, songs should be named after weirdly specific vibes and feelings ONLY

[veryslowreader]

The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown

Orange Is the New Black: "Flaming Hot Cheetos, Literally"

[dysco-lymonade]

Top five favorite snacks!

Oh hell, this is going to be hard. So I’ll try to keep it simple.

1. Salt and Vinegar kettle chips. Literally burn my mouth to hell and back from the acidity, I don’t even care. Gimme the whole bag.

2. Charcuterie in any form as long as there’s something pickled involved, but I’m a slut for a kosher dill.

3. Sour cream and cheddar Ruffles potato chips, ‘nuff said.

4. Spinach Artichoke dip on a nice big toasty crouton 🤤 it’s technically and appetizer but those are snacks too right???

5. Flaming hot Cheetos

Bonus snack: My wife 🤌🏻