#first guy liked RUSH too much
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come to the conclusion i seen to only like 2 types of men
1: guys that like gorillaz too much. (my only two boyfriends)
2: bartenders. emo bartenders. (the last 2 guys i’ve had crushes on)
i think i need to be put down this is not okay
#sludge speaks#it is 5am i haven���t slept hello#both my first two boyfriends crashed and burned#convinced gorillaz cursed my relationships#(they were both just assholes who happened to have a similar music taste)#first guy liked RUSH too much#second one never really listened to music#red flags for both#turns out the first emo bartender from last year had a crush on me at the same time#but i transitioned now n he’s straight#he’s dating my best friend now i think#anyway. second bartender is current guy.#he bullied me relentlessly every time i go in#he’s also my other friends best friend#help me#i will not say anything to him#because he works in my local spoons#and i refuse to stop going to spoons if shit goes south#also my other best friend works in there#could just ask her#he’s probably straight#sorry this is turning into a therapy session#happy 5am my fag ass should probably sleep now
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to stay the same sad, sorry mother
#resident evil 7#resident evil 8#mia winters#rosemary winters#eveline re7#rose winters#resident evil#resident evil fanart#blood#do u guys ever think abt how insane the mia development is in such a good way. like being an alone single(ish) mother w a bioweapon baby#who just wants a family. then they kill that kid and they escape just to be doomed to the same life again. i dont think shed EVER view her#life w rose as punishment dont take it like that. but more so her life is a punishment to pay for her sins via the cycle of being given#everything back. just to end up with the same isolating issues she had in re7#her motherhood is so interesting!!! i think shed have a lot of complexities w it.. a balance of unconditional love out of fear of how badly#she messed up the first time. oh my goddd#i love herrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr shes my fav re chara ever and like. all time top faves in general. i love her so much GRRRRRRRRRR#idc if this looks kinda ass n rushed but i had to put it down ^.^#a childs loving grip too LOL *goes insane*
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Click for better quality!
Hey guys I'm still into wha btw, here's my art for the deciduous spells zine, just wanted to draw my favorite guys being happy for once.
I feel like my art always ends up being in a modern au idk how, it just keeps happening
#I don't talk enough about how much I love these guys#also can you tell this was my first time drawing Coustas and Tartah? Probably#this one is from September so it's a lil rushed bc I was going thru it with uni homework (I still am)#Man I want to make more fanart but something always comes up yk how it is#Wha zine#Wha fanart#coco witch hat atelier#Coustas witch hat atelier#Tartah#Coustas#atelier of witch hat#witch hat atelier#i drew something#Wha coco#Wha Coustas#Wha tartah#It's not really an old piece but tbh I probably would have done some things differently if I'd made it today#the composition never quite satisfied me with this one you have no idea how many sketches I made and none ended up looking good ughhh#But whatever what's done it's done life goes on and all that#Alt text#image description in alt#image described#image description in alt text#I feel like I always put too many tags saying the same thing#Sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes in the alt text there might be idk English
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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jashtober day 1: singles
#i think i did too much shading and it looks wrong but this is the first time i've shaded like this so gimme a break#it was also kinda rushed and i don't know if it's even clear which song it is. it's tfftt btw guys#anyway don't expect as much effort for the rest of the month. this was mostly an experiment bc im getting used to ibis paint again#the fact it matches up with todays prompt is a coincidence that i'm taking advantage of#chonny jash#chonny jash fanart#chonny jash the forest for the trees#chonny jash tfftt#cj tfftt#cj the forest for the trees#jashtober#digital art#art#ethan's romanceless art
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thinking about how Belphie’s situation in s1 is so Blackbird (the song) coded
(Because I never stop thinking of lesson 16 and Belphie in season1 I could go on a word rampage about that arc.)
warnings: SPOILERS FOR LESSON 16 OBEY ME lesson 16 is its own warning guys
Notes: I basically just rewrote the s1 Belphie plot line. That’s it. It’s basically the exact same but written narratively lol. Also!! I plan on writing part 3 of the obey me as soulmate tropes (barb and dia are already done) but Solomon’s part is giving me such a creative block for some reason so it’s taking a while! Sorry!
Constructive criticism welcomed :)
“Blackbird singing in the dead of night,”
Shouts for help echoed through the hallways of the House of Lamentation. Why did it seem nobody but you (and the man who tried stopping you from approaching the attic, Lucifer) could hear them?
You snook your way around the house, trying to avoid the stars visible from Lucifer’s doorway and other places you’ve seen him roam at night. Even if he was distracted listening to Levi’s TSL vinyl, you didn’t want to risk it. You were determined to go up to the attic and listen to the voice shouting for you to please help, so you could free whatever may be trapped up there or at least hear it out.
You thought for a moment his calls for help sounded akin to a blackbird singing a morning’s song, though there are no mornings in the eternal darkness of the devildom; only the dead of night forever.
“Take these broken wings and learn to fly,”
You carefully made your way up the stairs, “MC, finally, no one is going to stop you. Now’s your chance to climb the stairs.” How did this voice know your name? More importantly, why are they asking you for help? What got them up there in the first place?
Your internal questions halted when you finally came face to face with the person behind the caged door of the attic. He never said his name, however he did ask you for help, and who were you if not humane? You’re here as a human, after all. He instructed to you to make pacts with the six demon brothers, starting with Beelzebub, in order to gain the power to free him. Your heart hurt for the poor human who claimed to have been locked away for so long they’ve forgotten who they are and how long exactly they’ve been locked away.
Make pacts with my brothers, learn to set me free.
“All your life, you were only waiting for this moment to arrive.”
Belphie has been waiting for so long, months now spent just sitting in the same room, air long turned stale. He could tell you exactly how many boards were on the floor and cobwebs were in the corners of the room. Of course, his brother had to lock him away. Of course, his brother chose Diavolo’s rule over his own little brother.
Finally, after so long, there was finally something. A human no less, who had finally managed to enter the attic. If it had to be a human who would save him, so what?
He had been waiting so long for this moment to arrive. A moment to be free again, and even a moment to seek revenge.
“Blackbird singing in the dead of night,”
All Belphie heard at night now was the voice of this human. It’s strange how much comfort its grown to bring him, given his plan. But the voice of his brothers and his dead twin would be much more comforting to hear, and his sister was a much more comforting presence.
He knows he won’t miss you when you’re gone, or else he just wouldn’t go through with it, he just wouldn’t continue to manipulate you into working to free him just for him to kill you. But he will miss the routine of having a concerned voice chirping at him in the dead of night while everyone else is asleep. He’s sure Beel will suffice.
“Take these sunken eyes and learn to see,”
At last the moment came, you had finally freed him, even if you weren’t there when the cage opened, he knows it was you. Had you finally made a pact with Lucifer? Is that why he’s free? Credit given where credit is due, you were surprisingly competent for a human. It’s a shame the fate that befalls you. The fate Belphie has the power of stopping, but chooses not to.
Your eyes were so tired he noticed in the brighter lighting of purgatory hall. Sunken and tarnished by dark bags. Was this the result of your late night visits to the attic? Had you just been working too hard? Who knows, I’d rather, who cares? Any pity he felt, he swallowed down and it was quickly drowned by his seething and growing hatred for your kind. Maybe in another life, he and Lilith would be sneaking down into the human world to watch you and your kin, but not anymore. You can’t teach him to see humans as more than vermin.
“All your life, you were only waiting for this moment to be free.”
A humans life is always only building up to death. It’s what every human spends their life anticipating, waiting for the sweet relief or curdling torture of death. Would you feel dread in your last moments? Perhaps irony? He never could grow fond enough of you to change his plans, but you did plant an invasive seed of interest in him. He hates how he wants to understand you now more than ever, how does the human mind and spirit face death? Are you different from the countless other humans he’s killed? Are you more accepting?
It’s sad to say that the only regret he has from killing you is not making it last long enough for you to express your final thoughts to him. If only he had dragged your death out longer, given you time and air to carefully pick out your last words, maybe even a last emotion shared just with him. The thought of wanting to be the one to see your dying face, hear your dying thoughts and feel your dying senses feels quite intimate for a murderer and the murdered. Maybe in another life you weren’t unfortunate enough to be born as a human. In another life, he thinks. He dwells on the ‘ifs’ too often.
It’s only natural for humans to die. They wait their entire life for that moment of freedom, really he gifted you by killing you while you were still well loved by those around you, his brothers. Oh, his brothers will be mad… they’ll get over it, in time. They can’t love you enough to stay mad at their sweet little brother, right?
#obey me#obey me solmare#obey me!#obey me shall we date#obey me belphegor#obey me Belphie#om! belphie#I will NEVERRR get over lesson 16#like don’t get me wrong I love Belphie#but we forgave him WAY too fast. why did the brothers take longer to forgive him that we did?? WE died!!!#the brothers should’ve helped us forgive Belphie rather than us help the brothers get comfortable with him#cause I know damn well if you stuck me in the same BUILDING let along room alone with the guy who just killed me#whoowie my first reaction would NOT be trying to befriend him and make amends with his brothers#solmare rushed Belphies arc so bad and I’ll never forgive them for that SO MUCH ANGST POTENTIAL WASTED ON ALL THREE FRONTS#I should make a new post out of this atp instead of hiding in the tags erm lmao
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Yeah tbh, everything with Season 5 is ://///// Everyone and everything is so off and all they care about is arriving at Camlann and none of it feels authentic or earned to me. Like never mind the fact that this show was supposed to be a prequel to the legendary King Arthur days, everyone has these moments of acting so OOC just to push this weird unearned plot line. I have issues with Season 4 but I prefer to think the show ended with 4x13 and just ignore everything with Season 5 lol.
And about Gwen - nah it’s still a shit show I’ve been around since 2008 and this fandom has never talked about or treated her properly. They never will apparently but at least Angel doesn’t have to cop the vitriol directly to her face anymore.
yeah it really was just a push to DOTD and on one hand that finale has been the plan since s1 and i actually like DOTD because of past set-ups from previous seasons
however, all of it comes at a cost of some solid character building in s5
s4 ends with the sword in the stone legend and a (sort of) repeat “take back the castle” from s3’s finale that cements Arthur as King Arthur. so, i totally get your thoughts of “yeah, bbc merlin ends here for me” because it completes the build up to King Arthur and leaves the rest of his reign up to our interpretation
but then s5 comes around and where we are supposed to see how the Once and Future King’s reign’s been going, it sort of shows us that “yeah, sure, Arthur’s made some changes and allies but also not much has changed from s4 and magic is still presented as the evil antagonist and now we are one a faster countdown bc Camlann soooooooooo”
idk man :/ like i want to like s5 bc DOTD was so good (bc of how much had been built up all 5 seasons) but also i have so many “what if” scenarios that are for changing a lot of s5’s plot lmao
like the ending was inevitable and they could have still reached it without making those narrative choices for s5. in my humble opinion of course
#the whole Mordred plot is so interesting and could have been handled better#like i am not the first one to say it but come ON bbc :(((#Mordred is such a key character in arthuriana and yet he feels like a ‘oh yeah this guy needs to be our catalyst right’#like you made him such a sweet guy then made his reason for betraying Arthur feel rushed :/#him holding the memory of both Morgana AND Arthur as good people and have him struggle with it could have been so much more compelling!!!!!#but it’s fine#it’s whatever#that is what we have fix-its for#bbc merlin#asks#bbc merlin s5#also god is this fandom so bad when it comes to gwen#disappointed to hear the discourse is still bad in our year 2024 but also not surprised :/#also how some ppl defend her but only the bash other characters :/ you are part of the problem too#we didn’t deserve Angel she plays Gwen so well and i loved every scene of her but man :(#late apology but i am so sorry Angel 🙇♀️ yeah you don’t have to put up with us now and never had to since 2012#hope you’re doing well <3
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I finally saw the mean girls musical (the movie one) I have so many fucking thoughts oh my god
#thoughts#oni talks#mean girls 2024#I think I may be the only person to kind of like it? like don’t get me wrong it is kinda ROUGH but it has so much potential and there’s bits#and pieces that I actually really enjoy or wish they had more of or just aahh#I’ve been nonstop thinking about the ideal version in my head like there’s so much potential obviously I’m biased by like a lot#since for one I know I tend to like stuff other people hate or don’t like but for two this sequel was weirdly way more relatable so maybe#I’m just projecting from my own personal experiences but Idc the POTENTIAL THERES SO MUCH ID WANNA DO INSTEAD#like there’s so many little details and characterizations that I wish was expanded on or fleshed out and it’s just like it feels like either#half baked or that it’s gone through too many edits it’s like it’s scared to exist?? like there’s some differences I love and wish they lol#leaned into but it’s like it was terrified to be too different? or like they were rushing the end especially#like in my ideal form it’s a tv show coz I think they honestly have enough that could be genuinely expanded in a way more interesting way#via that format probably not like a super extended series like you COULD but you’d definitely need more expansion but I could see the potent#but like idk one SOLID musical season with expanded character story and not like one of those rush cram shows like a good solid one#like Regina’s characterization is so fascinating but also feels like slightly off and like they could’ve leaned way more into things?#like I think keeping Regina as a closeted lesbian gives the greatest potential and interest for an expanded story#like I loved maybe the first half of the movie the most like that one song she sang to manipulate Aaron would work so much more perfectly if#she’s singing it about/to Cady? I also think in my ideal brain an cool flashback episode for Janis and Regina would be so cool coz there’s#so much you could flesh out in a flashback than you could in a retelling which while I do like the retelling since it lets you imagine thing#I just! potential! I also want more of them interacting and I do think changing Janis to be a lesbian works if they leaned more into it?#I also think in my ideal form janis would have more comeuppance or acknowledgement of her shit? I also think an arc of Regina coming out#like one thing they missed from the original is Regina playing soccer at the end & I think they could hint more towards that and maybe lean#more into her at home life in an expanded story way coz her mom is clearly like… yikes. granted maybe some of my views on the movie are too#biased by personal experience but like the way she snaps at her mom usually in my experience isn’t out of nowhere? like parents behind#closed doors. or frustrations with what her mom has clearly been putting on her the way she tells her mom not to talk about her body is very#like idk a lot of the characters in this version feel more real to me bc they act really similar to people I know irl so the expanded story#could be cool. another one that in my ideal brain would have more is Gretchen and especially her relationships with Regina as well as with#that one guy and her parents I wanna see more of how that works and her arc to feel more meaningful when she dumps him & mentions family#also as much as I didn’t care much for the straight plot stuff there’s 100% missed potential there that I could see in the differences like#iirc in the original it’s regular algebra not AP calc which I think could’ve been used as an interesting characterization opportunity for
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YOU HABE TO!! LISTEN!!!! BOY!!!!!
YOU HAVE TO WATCH THE YOUTUBE VIDEO FOR IT TOO ITS SO COOL
IVE HEARD THIS ONE!!!!!! but i haven’t watched the video for it so i will do that
#answering asks#chair!!#chair asks#GODDD immediately this is giving me so much nostalgia i haven’t heard this song in ages…….#dude this video is sick as fuck???????#immediately some dynamic ass shit#WOAHH#I FORGOTT i forgot how good this song is falls over and dies#i love the black and white too that’s so so rad#OUGH i love the bits where it’s like rushing through all those scenes(?) it feels so Fast#WHATTT dude the fucking scene where she hits it with her skateboard and it like distorts and shit that’s so rad whattt the fuck#i love this creature it reminds me so much of the demons from princess mononoke#especially when it’s like the crawling shape with all the hands godddd#RED???????#OUGHT#ohhh dude….#now back to the first guy#AUGH#GOD ANS THE CAR EXPLODING#what the fuck#dude that fucked like that was absurd that went so hard#i really like how it like tied all the people together at the end#THERE WASS O MANY OF THEM
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I finished Hell's Paradise and while I did like it the ending was just meh but there are some aspects about the ending that make it worse the more I think about it so I just have to shut off my brain
#it's not tokyo gh/oul re ending level of bad but it's just kinda meh#a little rushed too#spoilers i guess but i do want to complain about something#so there was a tensen left which are the immortal guys and you see him in the present day still alive#which makes sense since no one killed him but why the fuck is mei there????#i feel like that makes her death so meaningless#if she survived at least leave some hints that she did idk and also having her appear but not say anything????#she desperately wanted a normal life but her in the present not even making a comment on why she's helping the other tensen like???#i get it's her family and such but i feel like she was going towards the path of healing from the family that hurt her#so her helping in bringing them back doesn't make sense to me#and all of that implied in TWO pages of the final chapter!!!!#as i said it gets worse the more i think about it but I've read worse endings so this one doesn't bother me that much#if this is me not really caring about this ed imagine how i was with the promised never/land and tokyo gh/oul re: lol#this manga was fine i just wanted to complain a little but i did enjoy the first season of the anime
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hey sorry i can't come to work today im thinking about the various implications of zombie horror and the way it affects people
#saw the post the other day about horror movies reflecting the greatest fears of society at the current time#..... it was so ouuugh#anyway zombie movies. fear of infection and pandemic type situations obviously#but also. a running thread in all Zombie Media ™ since forever has been like. someone you love got bitten and now u have to kill them etc#i think that's really interesting because it also ties into another thing about zombies: fear of being changed‚ involuntary#does the zombie know what it used to be? is the hunger filling an otherwise blank mind?#or is it just strong enough to override everything else?#what would that feel like though. both possibilities are unsettling because in case 1 you Die by most definitions#and something else looks like you and pilots your body around#actually that is very similar to imposter horror innit. ''guy in the team who got bitten but doesn't tell anyone until its too late''#and in case 2.... ooooihhhhhhh that's so much worse <3 you're alive you just can't do anything about it. just hungry#and now onto the third fear associated with zombie horror (and my favourite): the fear of being hunted‚ on a wide scale#think abt it. it's unclear whether humans actually count as apex predators. but population-wise we don't actually have A Specific Animal#- that hunts us#and that's not because we are fast or have sharp teeth or are adapted hunters. that's just because we're great at living in a society#and zombies are A Predator on a significant scale and we are NOT prepared for it#beecaaauusee--- [dramatic crescendo] they will exploit the *very* thing that made us so invincible in the first place!! 💞#one of the first signs of civilization is healed bones. cured sickness.#a human seeing another human looking sick/injured and immediately rushing to help. is a big part of why we've made it this far#zombies have our faces!!! they know how to walk and unlock doors and climb the stairs to our buildings#AND. AND. they're people you think you know. back again to the killing a loved one thing#that's so BRILLIANT as a tactic because the societal tactics that make people group together will now make them reluctant to kill zombies#WHICH IS WHY most media tries to dehumanize zombies in some way to make it easier. ohhhh they grunt and can't talk. they're slow.#they don't feel anything. they are not the person they look like. they're not even people. the alternative is much much worse#and i need it explored. what if they can run. what if they beg and plead that they're still the same person. what if they scream.#what if they say ''sorry i love you so much im sorry'' at the end. etc
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g o o d n i g h t .
#very incoherent rant about my week in the tags; sorry for incoherence i hit my head earlier so b s#im just. so d o n e with this week. 100000% done i say.#on monday i was late to work by 20 minutes and had to stay behind for half an hour to make up for it bc the app we use to clock in suuuucks#and i also found out that i lost $40 of my salary bc of said clocking in app which. suuuuuuuuuuucks#though. this week had a weirdly low number of samples. which was. kinda nice ig since i managed to finish all my work before 7pm… but still.#like we managed to finish our stuff so quickly that we managed to watch bee movie together on tuesday………#mmmmmm i don’t remember much about what happened on wednesday though…..#but yesterday. oh g o d . yesterday. thursday. whateverday. g o d.#so the software to operate one of the [lab equipment] machines kept crashing everytime we tried to print results#regardless of whether there were any samples being tested with said machine at the moment. which. y’know#sucks on its own. but it also means that the tested sample had to be reweighed and every sample that came after it had to be reentered again#which was a m a j o r pain in the behind.#so like. after i reran the sample post-first software crash… the boss’s favourite employee freakin’ remote-accessed the computer and#he did the results thing. and crashed the software. while a sample was being analysed. and the entire monitor!!! went!!!! dark!!!! when he!!#so. i ‘calmly’ and ‘rationally’ rushed out to the office area to give him a piece of my mind.#which. may or may not have involved screaming at him and slapping him. it’s too bad that i slapped him so loudly that our boss heard/saw it…#but. um. she didn’t call me out to screech at me in return. she sent him into the lab area to settle his thing himself in fact. so. hm.#i guess i’m able to keep my job for another week. maybe.#it didn’t stop my coworkers from making fun of me for slapping the guy though so b s#anyways ig i got my just desserts today bc i walked straight into the side of the door of an in-workplace bathroom stall at full force#and i think i bruised the side of my head… what goes around comes around ig……#idek what i’m even typing anymore i blame my head hurty for this#inedible blubbering
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Where's this notion of tracing sprites/models whatnot come from regarding SV? Is this seriously a discourse topic like?
Does it really need to be reminded now of all things to remind that the concept art comes first before the 3D stuff and that this has been something that's been followed for so long, because like, I'm pretty sure they didn't create a design out of thin air. This is literally how character design and whatnot works. Plus it's just heavily referenced from the dex art anyways.
The hell are people talking about tracing?
#Probs just those that did the initial post trying to be mad about shit to begin with because like#everyone does this. This is not exclusive to Pokemon. And not everything in the oficial art is traced anyways so like???#like what's the problem?#this is not a new concept#And Pokemon SV isn't even the only instance of similar artwork looking like sprites.#*Points to the Gen 5 first stage starters for instance*#this bothers me so much guys... this is NOT NEW.#Wow RANT alert#And before people say ''gamefreak is lazy'' lord help if you think that about us that trace stuff to get things like anatomy right too#actually no the POSES are just really similar#like dex similar but is that a problem also? /gen#anyways this has been a thing#heck even the earlier pokemon were 'traced'#basically this bothers me and I feel like the community doesn't remember that this is just normal#maybe tracing sprites into full art is not the same as 3d but you get me point#But 3d to 2d is a bitch to color because of shading and shit#there's also the work smarter not harder motif#I don't usually defend GF outside the rushed shit going on but just this once because I do think this is kinda dumb
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if people tell you smile 2 is good they're lying to you.
#🐇#if you hear good things about naomi scott believe it she was WAY too good for that movie#I think her character would serve really great in an original movie but the fact that it was a smile sequel made it feel shoehorned in#everyone was a bad actor in it accept for her and the random guy that wanted to help her if he's from the first movie idk I didn't see it#if you're going to see if for kyle..............................don't.#I mean I really liked the character of skye riley and naomi that was by far the best the rest made me feel like that lady with the math#equations flying around her head. uhhhh and I like the glitched out vaporwave music througout#I liked that they cast jack nicholson's son as an abusive asshole who has a creey smile like whoever thought of that that was a serve#the kill with the weight in the beginning was fun and gnarly#the ending was so rushed and it could have been SO much better like a million times better#skye's music is really great though I wouldn't hate it if naomi recorded an entire album for her#ummmmm yeah idk what else to say I won't be watching that again and now I have to go watch 'smile 2 ending explained' so I'm pissed#I mean it's obvious but at the same time I'm like ???? surely you didn't fuck it up that badly#actually you know what I don't like the way these movies are filmed! that kept bothering me like the almost fish eye lense#I get what they were going for with it but it was just sort of annoying#idk you're gonna see a lot of tiktoks about how crazy it is and how the ending will traumatize you and I really don't think it will even#slightly. I'm actually convinced most of those tiktoks are undisclosed ads now that I've seen the movie#but listen if naomi scott wanted to take the idea of skye riley and make an original film or even a series I would love that#like the little bit with alfredo was probably the scariest thing I wish that had been the plot almost idk#I'm still gonna go listen to her music rn though bye
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I think Fluttershy is the only one of the six that smokes weed at all regularly, like probably a few times a week for his anxiety. Only smokes a lot when he hangs out with tree hugger cuz he doesn't wanna be rude when TH offers some to him
#pinkie comes off as an 'ill try anything once' guy so i imagine he tried it at some point. i don't think he'd like it very much tho#i think pinkie would be more into hallucinogenics but only partakes in them every now n then#Dash also tried it at one point but ofc he had an edible like a dumbass n the experience traumatized him#like ate the whole lollipop at once bc flutters told him not too#Dash decides hes just gonna stick to the occasional cigarette. like hes an athlete so he cant really smoke often.#prolly only does it in the first place bc he thinks it makes him look cool. hates the taste/smell and head rush but Anything for validation#twilight would just Never take drugs. i cant see twi partaking in anything other than alcohol#aj just isn't interested really at all he also just sticks to cider#rarity smokes opium#and/or does coke prolly#mlp fim#mlp g4#my litte pony friendship is magic#thoughts
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i do need 2 work on rewiring my brain so that my immediate very first thought whenever i dont do a small task (like brushing ny teeth taking a shower picking up my room etc) isnt 'We Should Kill Connor ." this would be pretty good for me to do. putting this on the list
#its difficult. i used to be rly good abt not doing kms type jokes bc i did when i was younger and then i stopped bc of um . stuff#nd i think it rly was good for me nd then ykw started making them a LOT and now i do them constantly and ik itis bad for me like. as a guy#whos been suicidal since i was 7. yk. ik itisnt good for me but its hard#idk. i need 2 try 2 stop making them again. like idt ppl who make them r evil I personally dont tend to use them very seriously#it rly is judt a like. Ugh something annoying happened i should kms. but like. witht he we should kill connor joke its Less and less a joke#and more just feeding into ummmmm. the bad parts of my thing that i have to be vague abt so ppl dont worry.#Im not planning anything its not that. its just a belief i have that is ummm concerning to many but very comforting to me and keeps me sane#but i dont like 2 talk abt it . bc ppl tend to get worried its rly not anything that bad its judt likeee. I know that thing is true and#there isnt anything i can do to stop it from happening so i made peace with it ages ago and its comforting that i dont have 2 like. worry#abt whatll happen bc ik whatll happen#sry im being vague ive like. i think ive mentioned it a couple times and ppl get very concerned (my old psych literally told me verbatim#That sounds so terrifying.) and likeee. there have been times its scared me a lot like i can remember a few times i woke up having a panic#attack bc i didnt want to do it but i know thats whatll happen and its fine. but it wont be any time soon#it keeps me from doing anything honestly bc like. why rush FJFNFJNFNik itll happen eventually no matter what i do so even when it gets bad#enough i think abt it im like. yk. it helps. i kind of lost a bit of vagueness. please dont worry abt it fr like. it keeps me sane it keeps#me calm. but anyways i say all this to sayyyy that like. idk it might be a while b4 i commit to trying to stop making jokes like that just#bc like. i have a lot of other stuff abt me i need 2 fix first but i think it would probably be good for me if i stopped. sigh. which suck#bc like its been said time and time again that like. Im going to kms is just like. it encapsulates feelings very well there r like no other#exclamations that fit. aside from the like. Krill my shellfish type things but thats the reason i slipped back into just saying kms in rhe#first place so. UGH. and theres so many fucking stupid tjmblr ones. like no im not going to sub Kys for Go step on a lego >_< bc like... im#not 1. 5 or 2. 27. the 2 ages i think ppl would say shit like that.#sry my vendetta against 27 year olds is neverending idk i just dont like whatever happens to tumblr users of dhat age. ive mentioned it#several times inwont go into it and im probably near out of tags anyway#ive got 7 more spend em wisely one supposes. idk. its just difficult. ik its judt words and shit and im sure i cn come up with good#alternatives. theres judt like not any rhat r like the same vibe without also reinforcing My stuff in an unhealthy way. idk. idkk#like not that making kms jokes is gonna make me do it anytime soon but like yk . ik i cant blame my self loathing spike on this alone#bc ive like. Beeeeeeeen going through some stuff thats contributing way more#but i do think before i started making these jokes again my self loathing and like. rhe amt of time i thought abt it was less . idk#sui ment#<- jic i tried not to be like. too much. but you know
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