#fighting for my goddamn life
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#jude the obscure#thomas hardy#fighting for my goddamn life#stopped mid history paper to make this absolutely not worth it sorry dr gentry
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rly wish people would stop pissing me off as if im not on my last limb like bro I will never talk to you again, I can't even promise I'll be here TO talk to you again, go the fuck away
"you upset me but I won't tell you why cos if you really cared you'd already know" ok all im hearing is that you want me to keep doing the same shit over again? cool dumbfuck, noted
#personal#rant#I know this is mean I know I'm lashing out#that's why it's here and not to these people#so fucking annoying#like how am I ever supposed to apologize in a way that means something if you're holding my wrong doing hostage#wtf do you people want from me God fucking damn#I genuinely cannot keep living this way#yall#me#life#livin#it's too much#I'm getting so fed up#I be over here literally fighting myself for my own life#and still have to worry ab being crucified because ????#assuming it's being absent#which again#fighting for my goddamn life#but sure it's fine fuck me I'm such a dick lol
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Pit Babe + actual sentences they say in the show (alternative title: Pit Babe + causing me psychic damage)
#still fighting for my goddamn life against the lighting in this show#i am. giving up on the coloring. i'm releasing it as is take it i don't want it anymore akdhfakdj#anyway i was waiting to see if i was gonna have to add anything to this but i'll just throw it out into the void now#pit babe#pit babe the series#charliebabe#babecharlie#rae tries to gif shit
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something something blood-soaked hands cradling your face something something
anyway here's the post btw
#what if post dp3 logan struggles to emotionally accept that wade Will Actually For Real Survive Anything#and one time they are fighting some random baddies#and they somehow get in a few shots straight to wade's cranium and he drops like a bag of slutty slutty potatoes#and logan goes full berserker trying to get to him#like he just massacres everyone in his way and wade still isnt getting up ohnoohnoohnonotagainohno#(healing factor or no a few direct shots to the brain stem/t box take a bit to recover from)#(no more than five minutes but it's an eternity to logan)#and his heart sinks to the very core of the earth as he kneels down next to wade's body#and his hands are shaking and soaked in blood and he can't seem to sheathe his claws in his dazed adrenalined state#he tries to peel back wade's mask and fear is just *pounding* through his system because in that moment#all he can see are the xmen dead in massive pools of blood#and that feeling of unreality is rushing over him like thiscantbehappeningthiscantbehappeningnotagainohgodnotagain#wade's still and unresponsive and there is so Much BLOOD (hard to tell how much is Wade's and how much is just on his hands)#and logan doesn't even realize he's crying until suddenly wade's eyes light up like a computer restarting#and he's smiling and gasping and joking immediately#“well howdy there hot stuff what did I miss?”#and then he clocks that logan is Not Okay#“... well gee willikers golly goddamn peanut 'twas only a flesh wound! no need to go all waterworks over lil ol me”#“you know it would take a helluva lot more than that to make me shuffle off this here mortal coil!”#“see all better I'm hunky dory peachy keen right as fucking rain”#“I mean cmon I can't have been out for more than five minutes so let's just go back to you being exasperated with my bullshit antics okay??#“...okay sugarboobs? snookums? babycakes?.... Logan?”#and they just sit there on the floor holding each other for a while#wade babbling and logan crying about everything he's lost and wondering distantly how he has come to care so much#about this blithering jokester in like barely a week#that the thought of losing him brought him crashing back to the worst memory of his extremely rough life#anyway that's enough tag mini fic lolol I'm having feelings about my own drawing I guess 😵#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#poolverine art
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world's most ill-equipped man to deal with warm weather forced to work at a summer camp
#oh sasha. idk how he survives in a goddamn turtleneck and suit jacket im fighting for my life in shorts and 25 celsius#i do like to think that the gloves stay on no matter how warm he gets because sensory reasons !!#and also because gloves are easier to draw than regular hands to me. oops#drawing him in summer outfits is so silly because i get to do his stupid dreadful socks and sandals. my beautiful failwife#psychonauts#sasha nein
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the tumblrwoman we deserve <3
#Vriska#vriska serket#homestuck#tumblrwoman election 2023#vriskasweep#fighting for my goddamn life out here#quick doodle bc this is my fucking superbowl
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a mildly out-of-context comic from my au
[ > ] / [> (digital alt)]
#was not planning on this being this long#or being something that i even post#i was just trying to get an idea down but then it turned into a Thing#whysopasta art#whysopasta otherworld au#creepypasta#marble hornets#tim wright#eyeless jack#comic#fan art#sketch#sketchbook#angst#?#i dont actually know what constitutes angst#mh#was fighting for my goddamn life trying to get this uploaded adkjflksadjf but i DID IT#YAYYY (imagine the last pic of tim w his head in his hands but theres party poppers and confetti all over it)#im so tired
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attack on titan as textposts pt 3
pt 1 - pt 2 - pt 4 - pt 5 - pt 6 - pt 7 - pt 8 - pt 9 -pt 10
#attack on titan#aot#snk#reiner braun#levi ackerman#eruri#erwin smith#hange zoe#sasha braus#connie springer#eren jaeger#bertholdt hoover#niccolo#sorry the quality is so goddamn terrible with some of these im fighting 4 my life just trying to find screenshots that work
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My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)
When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.
She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.
She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.
She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.
...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.
Remember this line?
You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:
Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?
...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)
As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.
She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.
I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.
...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.
I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.
And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.
She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.
During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.
She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.
But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.
Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.
...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?
But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.
If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.
I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.
She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.
Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.
So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.
She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.
For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.
She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.
But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.
If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.
But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.
He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.
He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)
She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.
He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.
Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.
They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.
None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.
It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.
Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.
She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.
She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...
She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.
I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.
How much he loves her.
And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.
Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.
It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.
She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.
I feel like this moment here...
-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.
Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.
And it's all thanks to Sonic.
If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.
Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.
He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.
Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.
Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.
They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.
"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"
"Wouldn't dream of it."
#piko rambles#sonic the hedgehog#amy rose#Meant to be platonic but I don't care if you tag as ship lol#I've been meaning to post something like this for the longest time now but never really got into posting it-#-because you guys REALLY hate seeing these two together for some reason.#Well not for SOME reason. There are valid reasons why you don't ship them. Everyone has valid reason why they don't ship this or that.#But sometimes those reasons can just sound so petty to me. Like the reason why is because Amy is a stalker or Sonic hates her which is FALS#Also those age gap arguments are understandable but so goddamn annoying sometimes. Maybe when they hit their late teens or early twenties-#then they can be together if they want to. Besides a good percentage of Sonic ships are better off if they waited til they're old enough im#I love them regardless of whether they're just friends or an awkward older cringe fail couple lmao#But them being just friends and hiding away all their emotions towards each other just to keep them safe and happy with them- 😭😭😭#Son/adow is my favorite ship of all time and sonamy is my favorite childhood ship/platonic ship because they both have one thing in common.#ANGST 😀#I've been thinking about Sonic and Amy's dynamic as of late and MAN-#Mixed with some personal headcanons of mine and their dynamic as of late just makes me so emotional.#Sonic and Amy have gotten so close now and it's so sweet but so heartbreaking at the same time when you think about it.#I'm so happy they are getting along better and being there for each other but there is so much to dissect here. So much to think about.#I might be a little silly but Amy losing her parents and being alone for so long and being the reason why she's always hanging onto Sonic-#-explains SOOOOOOOOO much about her. At least that's my headcanon for WHY that is.#Amy with abandonment issues speaks to me on a personal level. I'm always afraid of being forgotten or left behind by my family.#I sometimes feel like I'm not good enough no matter how hard I try. I do not blame Amy. I relate to her a lot. It's one of the many reasons#-why Amy is my favorite character besides Sonic and Shadow.#She fights hard to prove she's a valuable member of the team and hates getting left behind but despite all that she wasn't afraid to-#-express herself and her love for people. But after the Eggman War there was some changes that made her less expressive about her love.#Yeah she still loves Sonic but she doesn't admit it because none of that matters anymore and she thought that not being loved by Sonic#-is better than being loved since she nearly wasted her life loving someone who she thought has constantly bothered. 🥲#But I think after TMoStH I think she'll be less afraid of being expressive about it. She and Sonic are just so caring for each other 😭#I love these two way too much that when I think about them for too long I'll start SOBBING 😭😭 I'M EVEN SOBBING RIGHT NOW LMAO
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I miss them so bad (Dick and Damian)
#ramblings of a lunatic#dc comics#damian wayne#dick grayson#ITS JUST NOT THE SAME MAN#idk i was reading nightwing must die (again...) bc i was in a funk and saw another post saying how fans exaggerate the closeness btwn them#and on the one hand i get it. there is a very rosy portrayal of their relationship you'll come across in fanon#and they weren't very close at the beginning of their relationship#but man. reading Nightwing must die again was like#YES they fight. damian instigates it and while dick tries to exercise patience he does fight back/lash out on occasion#but despite all that it's still emphasized how important the two are to each other#when dick is forced to picture a future where he's lost his way he pictures damian being the one to bring him back#not necessarily bc damian is his favorite person on the planet but bc he gave damian robin. for a lot of practical reasons-#-but also bc how far damians come is (i think at least based on this arc) a testament to dick that hes doing Something right#both as a hero/person#damian is more than just a burden saddled on him (although there's an element of that in their batman and robin run)#he's also a last remaining connection to bruce when he's gone (remembering where he comes from) AND he's training damian+#-his own way! with a dash of tough love and workaholic spirit inherited but also a lot of patience and focus on being More than the darkness#idc what ppl say nightwing must die makes sense for these two. its a retcon but one that works imo#that dick buried his head in the sand about how much damian meant/the responsibility he had to him bc it was a commitment he was afraid of#and how damian ultimately was a point of maturation for dick even if he went back to being Nightwing#they were SO goddamn close and now they're still close but only in ways that are implied#and their bond is deemphasized in comparison to each others bond w/ say bruce. which i think is a shame#it was a wrinkle! a fun wrinkle that the batfamily had that in some ways dick understood damian better than Bruce-#-even if he didn't feel like he could handle the responsibility of raising him full time#it kills me that bc of the n52 we never got the handover of the batman mantle (and damian) from dick to bruce#next nightwing writer...include a flashback to that moment AND have damian appear in the book in present....AND MY LIFE IS YOURS!!!#anyway. dick is damians brother but also damian a little bit imprinted on him like a baby duck and its rubbed off on dick#they're partners they're mentor mentee but most importantly they were batman and robin. and they were the greatest#NOT bc it was all peaches and roses but bc they cared for each other exponentially despite all that
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literally me today~🎃
#frank and his goddamn oranges#i am inherently pissed about it but literally only because i’m jealous#i can’t peel oranges#like i just don’t possesses the skill to get them started for peeling#i love oranges so much they’re so tasty#but i don’t eat them out of spite bceause i shouldn’t have to fight for my life just to fucking peel them#who wants to be my personal orange peeling assistant?#frnkiebby#frank iero#mcr#frnkiero#mcrmy#my chemical romance#frnkie#my chem#ilhsm
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oooh please someday tell us what you think of GOT
oh, no, it's my fatal weakness! it's [checks notes] literally just the bare modicum of temptation! okay you got me.
SO. in order to tell what's wrong with game of thrones you kind of have to have read the books, because the books are the reason the show goes off the rails. i actually blame the showrunners relatively little in proportion to GRRM for how bad the show was (which I'm not gonna rehash here because if you're interested in GOT in any capacity you've already seen that horse flogged to death). people debate when GOT "got bad" in terms of writing, but regardless of when you think it dropped off, everyone agrees the quality declined sharply in season 8, and to a certain extent, season 7. these are the seasons that are more or less entirely spun from whole cloth, because season 7 marks the beginning of what will, if we ever see it, be the Winds of Winter storyline. it's the first part that isn't based on a book by George R.R. Martin. it's said that he gave the showrunners plot outlines, but we don't know how detailed they were, or how much the writers diverged from the blueprint — and honestly, considering the cumulative changes made to the story by that point, some stark divergence would have been required. (there's a reason for this. i'll get there in a sec.)
so far, i'm not saying anything all that original. a lot of people recognized how bad the show got as soon as they ran out of Book to adapt. (I think it's kind of weird that they agreed to make a show about an unfinished series in the first place — did GRRM figure that this was his one shot at a really good HBO adaptation, and forego misgivings about his ability to write two full books in however many years it took to adapt? did he think they would wait for him? did he not care that the series would eventually spoil his magnum opus, which he's spent the last three decades of his life writing? perplexing.) but the more interesting question is why the show got bad once it ran out of Book, because in my mind, that's not a given. a lot of great shows depart from the books they were based on. fanfiction does exactly that, all the time! if you have good writers who understand the characters they're working with, departure means a different story, not a worse one. now, the natural reply would be to say that the writers of GOT just aren't good, or at least aren't good at the things that make for great television, and that's why they needed the books as a structure, but I don't think that's true or fair, either. books and television are very different things. the pacing of a book is totally different from the pacing of a television show, and even an episodic book like ASOIAF is going to need a lot of work before it's remotely watchable as a series. bad writers cannot make great series of television, regardless of how good their source material is. sure, they didn't invent the characters of tyrion lannister and daenerys targaryen, but they sure as hell understood story structure well enough to write a damn compelling season of TV about them!
so but then: what gives? i actually do think it's a problem with the books! the show starts out as very faithful to the early books (namely, A Game of Thrones and A Clash of Kings) to the point that most plotlines are copied beat-for-beat. the story is constructed a little differently, and it's definitely condensed, but the meat is still there. and not surprisingly, the early books in ASOIAF are very tightly written. for how long they are, you wouldn't expect it, but on every page of those books, the plot is racing. you can practically watch george trying to beat the fucking clock. and he does! useful context here is that he originally thought GOT was going to be a trilogy, and so the scope of most threads in the first book or two would have been much smaller. it also helps that the first three books are in some respects self-contained stories. the first book is a mystery, the second and third are espionage and war dramas — and they're kept tight in order to serve those respective plots.
the trouble begins with A Feast for Crows, and arguably A Storm of Swords, because GRRM starts multiplying plotlines and treating the series as a story, rather than each individual book. he also massively underestimated the number of pages it would take him to get through certain plot beats — an assumption whose foundation is unclear, because from a reader's standpoint, there is a fucke tonne of shit in Feast and Dance that's spurious. I'm not talking about Brienne's Riverlands storyline (which I adore thematically but speaking honestly should have been its own novella, not a part of Feast proper). I'm talking about whole chapters where Tyrion is sitting on his ass in the river, just talking to people. (will I eat crow about this if these pay off in hugely satisfying ways in Winds or Dream? oh, totally. my brothers, i will gorge myself on sweet sweet corvid. i will wear a dunce cap in the square, and gleefully, if these turn out to not have been wastes of time. the fact that i am writing this means i am willing to stake a non-negligible amount of pride on the prediction that that will not happen). I'm talking about scenes where the characters stare at each other and talk idly about things that have already happened while the author describes things we already have seen in excruciating detail. i'm talking about threads that, while forgivable in a different novel, are unforgivable in this one, because you are neglecting your main characters and their story. and don't tell me you think that a day-by-day account tyrion's river cruise is necessary to telling his story, because in the count of monte cristo, the main guy disappears for nine years and comes hurtling back into the story as a vengeful aristocrat! and while time jumps like that don't work for everything, they certainly do work if what you're talking about isn't a major story thread!
now put aside whether or not all these meandering, unconcluded threads are enjoyable to read (as, in fairness, they often are!). think about them as if you're a tv showrunner. these bad boys are your worst nightmare. because while you know the author put them in for a reason, you haven't read the conclusion to the arc, so you don't know what that reason is. and even if the author tells you in broad strokes how things are going to end for any particular character (and this is a big "if," because GRRM's whole style is that he lets plots "develop as he goes," so I'm not actually convinced that he does have endings written out for most major characters), that still doesn't help you get them from point A (meandering storyline) to point B (actual conclusion). oh, and by the way, you have under a year to write this full season of television, while GRRM has been thinking about how to end the books for at least 10. all of this means you have to basically call an audible on whether or not certain arcs are going to pay off, and, if they are, whether they make for good television, and hence are worth writing. and you have to do that for every. single. unfinished. story. in the books.
here's an example: in the books, Quentin Martell goes on a quest to marry Daenerys and gain a dragon. many chapters are spent detailing this quest. spoiler alert: he fails, and he gets charbroiled by dragons. GRRM includes this plot to set up the actions of House Martell in Winds, but the problem is that we don't know what House Martell does in Winds, because (see above) the book DNE. So, although we can reliably bet that the showrunners understand (1) Daenerys is coming to Westeros with her 3 fantasy nukes, and (2) at some point they're gonna have to deal with the invasion of frozombies from Canada, that DOESN'T mean they necessarily know exactly what's going to happen to Dorne, or House Martell. i mean, fuck! we don't even know if Martin knows what's going to happen to Dorne or House Martell, because he's said he's the kind of writer who doesn't set shit out beforehand! so for every "Cersei defaults on millions of dragons in loans from the notorious Bank of Nobody Fucks With Us, assumes this will have no repercussions for her reign or Westerosi politics in general" plotline — which might as well have a big glaring THIS WILL BE IMPORTANT stamp on top of the chapter heading — you have Arianne Martell trying to do a coup/parent trap switcheroo with Myrcella, or Euron the Goffick Antichrist, or Faegon Targaryen and JonCon preparing a Blackfyre restoration, or anything else that might pan out — but might not! And while that uncertainty about what's important to the "overall story" might be a realistic way of depicting human beings in a world ruled by chance and not Destiny, it makes for much better reading than viewing, because Game of Thrones as a fantasy television series was based on the first three books, which are much more traditional "there is a plot and main characters and you can generally tell who they are" kind of book. I see Feast and Dance as a kind of soft reboot for the series in this respect, because they recenter the story around a much larger cast and cast a much broader net in terms of which characters "deserve" narrative attention.
but if you're making a season of television, you can't do that, because you've already set up the basic premise and pacing of your story, and you can't suddenly pivot into a long-form tone poem about the horrors of war. so you have to cut something. but what are you gonna cut? bear in mind that you can't just Forget About Dorne, or the Iron Islands, or the Vale, or the North, or pretty much any region of the story, because it's all interconnected, but to fit in everything from the books would require pacing of the sort that no reasonable audience would ever tolerate. and bear in mind that the later books sprout a lot more of these baby-plots that could go somewhere, but also might end up being secondary or tertiary to the "main story," which, at the end of the day, is about dragons and ice zombies and the rot at the heart of the feudal power system glorified in classical fantasy. that's the story that you as the showrunner absolutely must give them an end to, and that's the story that should be your priority 1.
so you do a hack and slash job, and you mortar over whatever you cut out with storylines that you cook up yourself, but you can't go too far afield, because you still need all the characters more or less in place for the final showdown. so you pinch here and push credulity there, and you do your best to put the characters in more or less the same place they would have been if you kept the original, but on a shorter timeframe. and is it as good as the first seasons? of course not! because the material that you have is not suited to TV like the first seasons are. and not only that, but you are now working with source material that is actively fighting your attempt to constrain a linear and well-paced narrative on it. the text that you're working with changed structure when you weren't looking, and now you have to find some way to shanghai this new sprawling behemoth of a Thing into a television show. oh, and by the way, don't think that the (living) author of the source material will be any help with this, because even though he's got years of experience working in television writing, he doesn't actually know how all of these threads will tie together, which is possibly the reason that the next book has taken over 8 years (now 13 and counting) to write. oh and also, your showrunners are sick of this (in fairness, very difficult) job and they want to go write for star wars instead, so they've refused the extra time the studio offered them for pre-production and pushed through a bunch of first-draft scripts, creating a crunch culture of the type that spawns entirely avoidable mistakes, like, say, some poor set designer leaving a starbucks cup in frame.
anyway, that's what I think went wrong with game of thrones.
#using the tags as a footnote system here but in order:#1. quentin MAY not be dead according to some theories but in the text he is a charred corpse#2. arianne is great and i love her but to be honest. my girl is kinda dumb. just 2 b real.#3. faegon is totally a blackfyre i think it's so obvious it may well be text at this point#it's almost r+l = j level man like it's kind of just reading comprehension at this point#4. relatedly there are some characters i think GRRM has endings picked out for and some i think he specifically does NOT#i think stannis melisandre jon and daenerys all will end up the same. jon and dany war crimes => murder/banishment arc is just classic GRRM#but i think jon's reasoning will be different and it'll be better-written.#im sorry but babygirl shireen IS getting flambeed. in response stannis will commit epic battle suicide killing all boltons i hope#brienne will live but in some tragic 'stay awhile horatio' capacity. likely she will try to die defending her liege and fail#faegon will die there's zero chance blackfyres win ever#now jaime/cersei I do NOT think he knows. my brothers in christ i don't think this motherfucker knows who the valonqar is!!#same with tyrion i think that the author in GRRM wants to do a nasty corruption arc + kill him off but the person in him loves him too much#sansa i have no goddamn idea what's going to happen. we just don't know enough about the northern conspiracy to tell#w/ arya i think he has... ideas. i don't think she's going to sail off to Explore i am almost certain that the show doing that was a cover#because the actual idea he gave them was unsavory or nonviable for some reason. bc like.#why would arya leave bran and jon and sansa? the family she's just spent her whole life fighting to come back to and avenge?#this is suspicious this does not feel like arya this does not feel right#bran will not be king or if he is it'll be in a VERY different way not the dumbfuck 'let's vote' bullshit#i personally think bran is going to go full corruption arc and become possessed by the 3 eyed raven. but that could be a pipe dream#the thing is he's way too OP in the show so the books have to nerf him and i think GRRM is still trying to work out#a way to actually do that.#i don't think he told them what happened with littlefinger or sansa. i think sansa's story is vaguely similar#(stark restoration through the female line etc)#but the queen in the north shit is way too contrived frankly. and selfishly i hope she gets something different#being a monarch in ASOIAF is not a happy ending. we know this from the moment we meet robert baratheon in AGOT#and we learn exactly what GRRM thinks of the people who 'win' these endless wars of succession#and they are not heroes#they are not celebrated#and they are neither safe nor happy
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So I adore time loops and I think Sampo would be very fun in a time loop AU. Because despite having so many onscreen interactions with so many characters, he almost always seems to hold people at a certain careful distance, so it's fun to imagine what or who he's willing to use a time loop for, how far he's willing to go, how much he actually does care.
At the end of the Masquerade Duet companion quest, Sparkle mentions a catastrophe soon to befall Jarilo-VI. And some players have interpreted this as a past event (the catastrophe being the story quests we took part in there), but other players have speculated this as an upcoming disaster that Sampo is trying to mitigate.
And so, Gepard finds Sampo in Belobog, right after he was supposed to return from Penacony...or whatever it was called, Gepard had almost been too relieved to remember the name after Natasha assured him that Sampo was fine and not missing or dead, just on a trip since the planet was finally open for travel.
He had assumed this was some kind of vacation, or some shady business endeavor (valid), but when he sees him, Sampo looks. Exhausted.
His usual smirk is there, but there's something horribly off about it that Gepard can't put into words. His voice doesn't have the usual bounce in it. His gait slightly off. There are bags under his eyes, his hair is just the slightest bit out of place. Sampo looks exhausted.
His feet move without him really thinking, he goes up to Sampo to say...something. Maybe just ask him if he's ok. But he can't leave this alone and not do anything, because Gepard can feel it, something is wrong.
And that feeling sticks with him, like the persistent cold, like frostbite, all day. Gepard can't seem to shake it. There is a collective unease seeping through Belobog, sinking deep, tangling around their bones. And the only one who seems to be reacting truly different to it is Sampo.
Gepard tries to tail the guy a few times, anything he can do to learn about what's going on and ease this devouring dread, but Sampo seems to know where he's hiding and calls him out every single time.
He dodges every question (normal), slips out of every grab and grasp (normal), barely even looks at Gepard (decidedly NOT normal).
And maybe it's the darkness that seems to hover over them. The way the air feels like it is pressing down and smothering the breath out of his lungs. But Gepard's patience finally snaps, much sooner than he ever would have thought it would, and he finally grabs Sampo by the collar, hauls him up and forces his back against the brick wall of the alleyway. Because maybe Sampo makes his living double crossing and stabbing backs and he wouldn't understand this, but Gepard has a family, he has people he wants to protect, and so he needs to know what the fuck is going on.
And he knows he's crossed a line the moment he says it. He knows it's not true. Gepard has seen the way Sampo and Caelus sneak around in the Fragmentum or meander down the alleys, snickering with their arms slung around each other. He's seen the way Sampo lets Hook climb up his back onto his shoulders while he takes the moles on little adventures. He's seen the way he and Serval rib each other like it was natural, easy, and the way he goes out of his way for Natasha like he wouldn't any other client, had even trusted her with the knowledge that he was leaving off-planet.
Sampo has people he wants to protect, too, and Gepard shouldn't have accused him otherwise.
But before he can even apologize, Sampo does something stranger still.
Instead of telling him off, or taking a swing at him- both things Gepard would admit he deserved- Sampo just. Lifts one hand, lays it over Gepard's fists still balled in his jacket. Like he's keeping him there. Even through his gloves, his hand is warm.
And Sampo doesn't even really look at him, he leaves his head hung low as he quietly tells Gepard to just go home. Stay in with his family. Don't come out. Please. Please.
But eventually, the catastrophe strikes.
And Gepard can't. He can't stay safe inside his home while this is happening. He can't ignore this. He tells Serval and Lynx to stay in. Don't come out. And he dons his armor and marches out to protect as many people as he can.
When it's all said and done, all Gepard can see is rubble piled around him and a blackened sky. He can hear fire crackling. He can hear a voice he recognizes as Serval's wailing and screaming his name, and he knows she's not going to find him in time. She shouldn't even be out here.
A bloodied face swims into view, bright green eyes looking hollowed and haunted, posture weary and defeated. Gepard reaches out a shaking arm, trying to grab at Sampo's pantleg, trying to make any sound other than gurgling the blood filling his throat, because he knows it for certain now, he knew, Sampo knew.
"Not this time either, huh...?" The sigh he heaves isn't theatrical, for once. Somewhere, rubble groans and loudly collapses. Sampo doesn't even startle or turn to look at it. "I'll figure it out soon, I promise. There has to be a way to pull you through this alive. There has to be."
Something materializes in his hand, something red. Gepard's vision dims at the edges as he watches Sampo hold the mask over his face, as it seemingly attaches itself directly to his skin.
"See you on the next go around, Captain."
#hsr#sampard#gepo#gepard landau#sampo koski#I love open endings for things like this#but I did have the thought that like. the aeons are powerful enough to be immune to Sampo fucking with the timeline. so they all know.#(Aha is watching with a bucket of popcorn bc Sampo is Their Little Guy and They love to see him thrown into Situations ndmzjznd)#but this means that Qlipoth is also aware of what's going down. and They see how no matter what happens no matter what little things change#-Gepard still chooses to preserve whatever life he can. he chooses to protect every single time. and that becomes his saving grace.#Gepard DOES pull through not by compromising his morals but as a reward for keeping them because Qlipoth turns Their eye upon him.#They choose Gepard as Their Emanator. and that's what finally gives him power and the chance to live through his own actions.#and thank god lol bc Sampo would NOT be having an easy time with this au. i think everyone else he cares about would be relatively safe.#but Gepard considers it his DUTY to protect people. this is his RESPONSIBILITY. and he is so so goddamn stubborn about it.#so this isn't a case of man vs act of god. It's not Sampo vs The Catastrophe that's not what's going on here.#it's Sampo vs Gepard's unyielding will to protect whoever he can#and he is fighting a losing battle#my fics
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been binging tf outa Avatar the last airbender bc ive been puking my EVERLOVIN guts out since yesterday and hear me out
#remy would probably get cool weapons or somethin but honey im so sorry it would be the reality#sk8 squad#ollie#ponti#oscar#abio#kari#vinny#remy#im Just Now feeling like the worst is over but holy fuck talk about misery#and i Have to go to work tomorrow anyway since i had to call bc today was supposed to be the recovery day but nOOO body said fuck u#cause this is like the 3rd time this has happened this year alone like i refuse to believe its just a bunch of food poisoning instances???#i been eating the same for years and i know my immune systems been shot ever since covid but that was 4 years ago now somethin aint right#pray for my downstairs neighbors they had to hear me fighting for my life every 30 minutes PFFFT EEUUUAAGHGG HUFF HUFF HUFF yeah#although i will say all this shit has really toned down my emetophobia now everytime i gotta puke i just let out a long disappointed sigh#but goddamn still brutal tho
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„You look beautiful undone…and my heart's connected.“
„We learn the most when we least expect it. We learn the most when we break in two. (…) It's the cracks that let the light shine through…“ („Beautiful Undone” by Laura Doggett)
“Her hands were brushing a strand of his silky hair out of his face and in this exact moment, Julia’s whole existence got just one purpose: She would always protect this way too skinny, raven-haired boy with his adorably crooked nose and those beautiful - and yet so sad - obsidian eyes!”
This is a tiny snippet from one of my stories, which I’m only writing in order to cope with my own pain. I guess, I won’t ever be bold enough to share them publicly and my friend @vulnus-sanare has the duty to burn my laptop as soon as I’ll be gone one day (even though she threatened me to share my dirty work with the people in our beloved Snapedom).
But this little snippet fits perfectly with the amazing artwork, which my friend, the extremely gifted @snake-queen7 drew for me.
I’ve always had a soft spot for Severus in his younger years. All I’d wanted was to keep this boy safe from harm, making him feel loved and cared for…because this is exactly, what he deserved!
In my stories, Jules is Sevy’s friend, his lover, his protector, his guardian angel, his saviour, his powerful goddess of revenge. And to be honest, you don’t have to be a psychologist to understand, where this is coming from. Julia’s strength and her determination to make the world a better place for her beloved Severus are rooted in my own feelings of helplessness and despair.
My reality with ME/CFS couldn’t be more different from my stories. I feel trapped. Trapped in my own diseased and disabled body…trapped in my room….trapped in my darkness…trapped in a life, in which I don’t feel appreciated anymore.
I’m feeling more and more like a useless piece of furniture, which someone has hidden in a dark chamber. Still good enough to keep it, even though it’s not in plain sight…or at least not bad enough to waste it eventually.
Where’s my light? Where’s my saviour? Where’s my way out of this hell? I guess, it’s just like Severus has said: “Well, it may have escaped your notice,but life isn’t fair!” (“Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix”)
I’ve always loved Severus for his resilience, his stubborn determination and strength. Since 21 years, he’s not only my comfort character and the love of my life…he’s my role model, my inspiration to keep on going…to keep on living.
So, I’m clinging to him and to all the things, I’m using in order to cope with my misery: I’m a loving mother of three wonderful children. I have a handful amazing friends with a deep understanding of my grief and despair, but who also appreciate my dry humour and my sarcasm. I’m still capable of pouring out my feelings onto paper, creating something beautiful in my stories. And I’m full of gratitude for the artists of Snapedom, who are helping me to bring my creative ideas to life with their art.
And that’s exactly, what you have done for me with this delightful piece of art, @snake-queen7! Thank you for giving me some comfort and peace for my troubled heart and soul by drawing Sevy and Jules again. You are wonderful and I appreciate not only your outstanding art, but also your kindness and compassion. Thank you for everything! 🥹
🖤Sevy & Jules🖤
🖤Severus & Julia🖤
#sevy x jules#severus x julia#Severus x oc#fuck me/cfs#i have a soft spot for young severus#commissioning artwork is my goddamn coping mechanism#this is my red carpet for all the artists of snape fandom#i would protect him with my life#i would fight for him#i would kill for him#i would die for him#i will defend him with my life#mecfs#i love severus#severus snape#i love snape#young severus#severus fanart#severus snape fan art#snart#severus snape art#snape art
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I'm in the trenches right now
#fighting for my life against this runny nose#this goddamn cough#and the urge to continue my omegaverse wip#when i dare consider an alpha i get this image flashing in my brain#i-#GRRRRRRRRRR#manny jacinto#manny jacinto as reference#character pose
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