#fic Friday except its a thursday
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fuck it friday (except that it's thursday, but y'know, fuck it)
i've been rereading this scene i wrote for tsunami fic and i'm so excited, i just wanted to share it <33
"I'm here. I'm here." He says, kneeling beside the bed and resting a hand on Chris' shoulder, trying to comfort him. "It's okay, bud. I'm here."
"Where's Buck?" Christopher asks and the vines and thorns inside Eddie's ribs seem to grow larger and bigger upon hearing the words, until they're twisting and turning and wrapping themselves around his heart, in a vicious grip.
"I don't know, buddy." Eddie blinks, willing the tears away and clears his throat. He looks up at Chris and runs his fingers through his son's hair, gentle and tender. "We don't have news of him yet."
It's not fair, Eddie thinks bitterly and angry. Furious at the universe, at the world and its stupid natural disasters. At Shannon for having died and Buck for not being there and at himself for being angry at them for something they can't control.
Grief is funny and wicked like that.
"Dad, I'm scared." Chris whispers in a small voice and Eddie makes a hurt noise in his throat, coming to lay with him and wrapping him in a tight hug.
"I'm scared too," he admits.
"Buck saved me."
"I know, mijo. I know he did."
"What if he's dead?" This time Chris' voice is so low that Eddie barely hears it. "Like mom."
"We can't think like that yet, Superman." Eddie sighs, feeling like he's way out of his depth here. "Buck might just be lost right now, waiting for us to find him."
"What if he's not?"
There's a few beats of thick, syrupy silence streatching kn between them and then Eddie thinks—
"Hey, you know what makes me feel better?"
"What?"
"I've been calling Buck— It goes straight to voicemail, because his phone is probably dead at this point." Eddie says, wondering if this might fuck up Chris even more or actually help. "But it makes me feel like I'm talking to him, like I'm doing something instead of just waiting for bad news, you know?"
Chris moves and pulls away just enough so he's looking him in the eye and nods, a sad frown on his face.
"You wanna give it a try?"
"Yeah…" Chris hesitates but then says louder and firmer— "Yeah, I wanna do that."
Eddie nods and pulls out his phone again, dialing Buck. Of course, it goes straight to voicemail again.
"Hey! It's Back here! I'll get back to you as soon as I can but in the meantime leave your— Hey Chim, stop it! That's my food! Hands off, man!"
"Hey, Buck." Eddie says softly.
"Hi, Buck." Chris follows, his lower lip trembling. "Thanks for saving me today."
tagging (no pressure): @monsterrae1 @buddierights @prince-buck-diaz @alyxmastershipper @spaceprincessem @bigfootsmom @the-likesofus @spotsandsocks @dijkstraspath @starlingbite @messyhairdiaz @transbuck @honestlydarkprincess @transboybuckley @ebdaydreamer @bekkachaos @hippolotamus @shortsighted-owl @prettyboybuckley @cowboy-buddie @cowboy-buck @911onabc @panbuckley and anyone else who wants to do it <33
#fuck it friday#tsunami fic#evan buckley#eddie diaz#buck x eddie#buddie#buddie fic#911 fic#911 wip#buddie wip#my wips#my writing#911 on abc#911 abc
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Fic Recs Thursday (or Friday):
Okay, let me just say this: finding old/ underrated fanfics that focused on Mateo and Nancy as individual characters was hard. Harder than finding ones on disasters. But, here I go back down the AO3 rabbit hole @lonestar-s5countdown.
Canon Codas:
Keep running by ourfreewill: Mateo’s view on the events of 2x02– god this is sad. This makes so much sense as another headcanon to how Tim got so close to being part of the 126 family.
Such strange uncharted territory by @marjansmarwani: The 2x10 intervention that features soft Tarlos, and the 126 learning about Mateo’s living sitch.
I can’t carry this anymore… by @alidravana: There’s a small typo in the fic’s tag— it should be 2x14, but otherwise this was a nice look into Carlos’ THOUGHTS about hearing what happened with Mateo and his 129 captain. CW: discussed hazing/ homophobia.
A question of capability by rakketyrivertam: Owen’s conspiracy theorist side strikes an ethnicity-related nerve with Mateo after the mistaken alien call in 3x06.
Don’t lose sight of what I want by @alidravana: Mateo and Paul help TK through physiotherapy after the events of 1x08 and 1x09. It’s a painful day still, but one with a little hope sprinkled in.
Nights like these by Azphobic (orphan_account): After the traffic pileup turned shooting in 3x14, Mateo is one of the firefighters who nearly loses sleep over what happened.
Even dust was made to settle by tiniestmite: Takes place during 2x10, just before TK and the 126 stage their intervention for Owen. Mateo might be a bad secret-keeper, but he’s hell of a lifesaver.
Edamame and empathy by @blueink3: A 3x14 coda where Nancy seeks comfort from Tarlos and receives.
Some risks are worth it by RamblingDisaster73: This speculation fic should have panned out in 3x17. Heightism might be a thing, Julian and Brianna did solid jobs with what they were given, but their conflict just felt off to me.
Burnt CDs and moving forward by maplehobi: Another 3x14 coda covering the Nanteo “coffee date”, where Mateo and Nancy befriend each other after the shooting. Because I think this is a headcanon starting point— start as friends (bonus points if there’s a shared traumatic incident), see if there’s something more. -v-
Laughing gas by shes_an_oddbird: A light-hearted extension of the post-ANFO scene in 4x06, right after Owen and the firefighters avert the terror attack. Because if anything was done well in that arc imo, it was that scene.
Deep dive for Disasters (ooh, alliteration again! Includes an AU or two):
A storm to weather by @marjansmarwani: A 3x01 spec-turned-AU where TK is still on the wrong end of a rescue gone awry and still suffers hypothermia but it’s not as life-threatening. Slightly.
Not only to believe in ourselves, but in each other by MyCupOfTea and singerofsimplesongs: What if 9-1-1: Lone Star took place in the world of Pacific Rim? Tarlos-centric, with Paul and Mateo and Marjan making up the Crimson Typhoon equivalent.
I’d burn here if that’s what it takes by @blaineandsamevanderson and Skaboom: Another serial arsonist story, with much more direct consequences to Tarlos.
Fun and games (and friendly discussions) by @fallout-mars: An exception to the “disasters” rule, where the Catan crew have thoughts on the near-disastrous sinking of the new ship that is Nanteo in 3x17.
Heat wave by AliceSchuyler: During a particularly scorching day, Mateo gets bad heat stroke. It’s not a fun time, but good thing his firefighter family’s looking out for him just as much as he did them.
Family’s comfort by Gucci_Chainsaw: When the 126 report to an apartment fire, Mateo gets injured and trapped in its basement.
Put others oxygen masks on first by lorarawr: A 2x12 AU-coda where Mateo visits Tarlos at their hotel after they lose their home, and drops off more than just supplies from Owen’s house.
Mateo (not as underrated as I thought):
The company we keep by cosmiceverafter: Marjan, Paul and Mateo attend the Austin State Fair on their shift off, and bond over Moana.
On your side by @marjansmarwani: Mateo gains two protective brothers as the new 126 members meet and bond with each other.
These three works by fan_gworl should also be a series! Some Mateo whump included.
Cake, slang, and misunderstandings by Joanna_Kay: Hilarity, some heartbreak, and heartwarmth ensues after Mateo tries out some lingo in conversation with the 126.
Making the man by Joanna_Kay: A two-part series that, even if lot of it is retconned (like how his parents or at least his father still live in Mexico while he stayed with extended fam), explores how difficult Mateo’s childhood would have been as a disabled Hispanic kid.
In the meantime by @morganaspendragonss: In this 2x10 AU, Marjan offers Mateo her place to live in before Owen does. It’s another sweet big sister move. ^^
mateo begins by @lire-casander: How Mateo is just as much a mama’s boy as the father-figure magnet he later becomes. CW: discussion of disability struggles and bullying.
Jurassic Park & coffee cups by InkpotGod97: Mateo gets Marjan a thoughtful gift!
Allergies/asthma by @stardustviolet: TK owes Mateo an apology for blowing off his allergy to cat dander.
I know you can’t see it by myemergence: After Mateo gets his heart broken, Marjan assures him that he will always be enough. This was such a sweet sister-brother moment!
Cutting it close by tiniestmite: Carlos and Mateo have another friendship moment, but not without a little kitchen accident b/c it wouldn’t be 9-1-1 without a little lighthearted severity.
Officer Mateo at your service by mionejaina1011: Mateo meets Carlos earlier than in canon as a police officer.
Come deliver me back home by @morganaspendragonss: Mateo, TK and Carlos reckon with the arson attack one late night after Mateo has a long day.
(Des)esperanza, Leaving pieces of me behind by TearsThisSideOfHeaven: Two instances where Mateo and Carlos struggle in living not just as first responders, but as two Latino men in a red state that hasn’t completely accepted them.
Scent is the strongest sense by barelyprolific: How Mateo possibly develops a crush on Nancy after the dust storm. How come we didn’t get to see this in the show?
Speak my language by LynnOver: Where Mateo steps in as translator for TK when he encounters a Spanish family who doesn’t speak English.
Deja vu by HeartAngel1796: Mateo’s sitcom dream from 4x11 starts to blend into his reality, WandaVision style. Even imagining it feels trippy o_O.
Nancy (okay I was wrong— she gets way less personal stories than Paul):
Nancy Gillian brainrot by douglasdavenportslut: An abandoned series of ideas about Nancy’s character.
My armor falls apart by @marjansmarwani: Nancy, much like Carlos, grapples with the fear of losing TK in this 3x02 coda.
Finally standing on the inside by RamblingDisaster73: The events of 3x07 to 3x08 from Nancy’s POV (minus the inventory scene).
We’ll be just fine, On the outside always looking in by @morganaspendragonss: Two great character studies of Nancy as she meets TK and is accepted into the 126 family.
You’ll never walk alone, rejoice your truth @doublel27: The first story covers a convo between Nancy and Mateo about the events of 3x12, the second story a queer bonding moment when Nancy and TK man a medical tent at the Austin Pride Festival.
I always knew you’d find your way by @fallout-mars: Nancy has her own POV about TK and Carlos’ breakup, and the time after.
Soulmates aren’t just lovers by @nancys-braids: A series of “Nancy Begins” stories that start from her college years and continues into the present canon. Supporting characters include Carlos, Mateo and Marjan!
It’s not so weird after all by shes_an_oddbird: An ongoing series of codas about how Nancy and Mateo became Nanteo, because I’m pretty sure the show writers speed-built this ship by the seat of their pants and gave it a false start. Thank you for making this!
Tagging next, and this should still be open: @lutavero @reyesstrand @toomanycupsoftea @fitzherbertssmolder @marjansmarwani
#911 lone star#mateo chavez#nancy gillian#paul strickland#marjan marwani#911 lone star season 5 countdown#911ls season 5 countdown fic recs#disasters week
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Hey! Just so you know I’m waiting with baited breath for jtw to see all your works because I’m going to go feral for all of the words you are blessing us with, like that’s so so many words. Im in love with your writing and if I’m even a little reasonable about this it will be a lie. I’m ready to lose all coherency and just bask in the writing that you’ve worked so hard on to share with everyone. 💜💜💜💜💜
For the word ask thingy: breaks
Oh my gosh!!! Hi!! Thank you so much!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭 That’s so sweet and also I KNOW ITS LIKE MAYBE TOO MANY WORDS IVE BEEN WORKING ON THESE SINCE THE PROMPTS DROPPED IN MARCH!!! I hope you enjoy it all!!! Also saw your tags on some of my posts so I'm gonna respond to those real quick: mochaccino fic is Monday's post actually!! Sunday's post is... so angsty. Like, enemies to incredibly fucked up lovers. This is the snippet for sunday. I'm obsessed with it and I don't usually post darker stuff but I just love writing it so probably more darker stuff like this will come in the future too!!
Thing two: even if you don't comment on my fics, getting an ask like this means just as much!!! or seeing people interact with my posts on tumblr because I know it means they like my writing enough to keep an eye on me over here!! Seriously, I appreciate it any time someone says anything about my writing, even if it's just a reply or a tag, because I crave validation attention. Anything is amazing!!
And okay, this prompt was actually such a challenge for the word breaks because like EVERY SENTENCE WITH THAT WORD WAS A SPOILER I DIDN'T WANT TO REVEAL 😭 except for this one, which is for my thursday fic and I haven't posted any snippets of yet!!
Dick’s mouth pressed into a thin, disappointed line. “Damian isn’t the one who’s going to ruin the night, at this rate.” “So I’m right.” “Tim.” “Dick,” Tim narrowed his eyes at him, “I know what you’re doing.” Dick sighed, raking a hand back through his hair. “Look, I know you’re allergic to things like fun and breaks, but those are things someone has to make you do so you don’t become one with your computer!
Dick is SUCH a character in this, I love him so dearly. This one is going to be fun and silly which we'll need because of all the angst coming on Sunday, Tuesday, and Friday (and a little bit on saturday) 😂
Great job giving me a challenge!!! and thank you so much for the ask ❤💚💖
(Send me a word and I'll post a snippet from one of my jaytimweek fics that has that word in it)
#❤️ the-alice-of-hearts#<- you get a bestie tag now!!!!#welcome to the club 💖#batsasks#writing snippet#batwrites#thanks for the ask!!!
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I think I’m gonna not update Ikigai on weekends, actually, unless its for another fandom or something.
That lets me update about 3 times during the week (either Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday, or Monday, Wednesday, Friday, depending on the dates. I like publishing things on odd-number days, with character birthday exceptions)
I mean. The fic is going to be long, but each chapter is 3.5k words at the very least. My recent chapter (Chapter 7 as of this post) was actually 3.7k words.
That’s still at minimum 10.5k words per week. That, on top of the fact I do have a job, other hobbies, interests, working out...it really is a lot of effort. I don’t want to burn myself out writing 3.5k+ words every other day until it’s done. I do need more than 1 small break day.
It’s different spewing out a 1k to 2k word oneshot often, but Ikigai is taking a lot of time and concentration, and I’m putting all of my hard work into it.
And honestly, I think updating 3x a week is still a lot, considering tons of other fics and authors take even longer sometimes (justifiably so).
This will give me plenty of time to finish with it being on Chapter 16 by the time LIPxLIPs birthday rolls around (putting it on a pause for their bday oneshot ofc), and finishing the fic at the very start of March.
I may publish oneshots between it? Whether it be for other fandoms or random bursts of idea for my other hw ships, I don’t know. I can’t say for sure what I’ll be hyperfocused on in the future.
And depending on how things go, I may even be able to start posting the project that Bean and I are working on.
So please continue to support Ikigai!! I’m putting my entire soul into this fic to make it my best, my longest, and most proud fic yet!!
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Happy FFWF on the last Friday of 2022! What did you enjoy the most about writing fanfic this year? What are three fics you read this year that you would recommend to others? Don't forget to include links to fics, including your own!
happy ffws on the last saturday of 2022 haha! and daaaaangggg, choco, that's a great question!
i think one thing i enjoyed most about writing fanfic this year is expanding my array of fics and delving deep into intropsection and other various themes. i mean, i most definitely had a few fics from last year that were introspection, but this year i had waaayyyy more of these fics, most of which are based upon Aang's grief of the Air Nomads because for some reason that's my favorite thing to explore (lol...). but i also began exploring more niche themes that i don't think many people in the atla fandom tend to explore, such as Katara's changing perception of Aang as the avatar (gods don't bleed (except you do)) and Zuko's guilt on his role in the Fire Nation's imperialism (dreamless dreams).
this year, i also learned that i enjoy writing other relationships that aren't Kataang! i really did enjoy writing Iroh's and Lu Ten's relationship in leaves let go (to fall from the vine) and Hakoda's and Aang's potential father-son relationship in these sleepless nights we spend (waiting to come home). even in my current in-the-works multichap see the sky and sea (and remember me), i love writing Sokka's and Katara's sibling relationship just as much as the Kataang. these things are definitely something i enjoyed the most when writing these fics this year, and i'm waiting to see what next year will bring!
now, three fics i read this year... hmmm....
Monarch by @itsmoonpeaches. it's a sin to say i've only read this amazing fic this year (and yes it's still a Work-In-Progress) but OML this is so good!! the court intrigue, the characterization of Azulon, the various nefarious motives everyone has, the backstabbing... ugh i would most definitely recommend it to the atla fandom!! this deep dive into the imperialism of the Fire Nation through the eyes of the royal family would be one that's very very tricky to do well, and Peaches wrote it masterfully!
Unspoken, Undeniable by @flameohotwife, which is her fake-dating au for Kataang. there’s a lot of amazing fluffiness and pining and even a little bit of angst as Katara and Aang dance around each others’ feelings HAHAHA. would definitely rec it for a good ol’ fluffy romantic time! (also yis there is a sequel to that if you’re horny LOL)
and finally, your fic Drag You Down, which was just completed this past thursday! this is a kind of Kataang fic i have seldom seen in the fandom, a Kataang fic that’s more than a Kataang fic! it addresses Aang and Katara as who they are, down to their core, and their flaws and fears as the reason why they had to split up--and not because of a “simple miscommunication problem” either. it weaves in a storyline that is not just about Kataang, but it works in such a way that it affects how Aang and Katara each navigate the barrier between them before they can finally get together. in essence, the fic isn’t putting Kataang as the sole focus, but as the foundation of the story, with each event affecting it in some way, even if it’s not directly related to the relationship. it also addresses themes of The Guru and The Crossroads of Destiny that i rarely see in the Kataang fandom, and it’s done so well and so in-character for the both of them! overall, such an amazing fic i would definitely recommend to anyone who wants to bite into its themes and character-building!
thanks for the ask, choco!
#northern answers#chocomd#northern recs a fic#three fics actually#lol#late ffwf#ffwf#ffwf answer#late ffwf answer
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Okay so I've gotten a few questions and I'll do my best to answer them with a brief walkthrough of how this exchange works.
All this information (and more details) can be found here if you still have questions! (The link is to the Yuletide 2023 profile page)
Full walkthrough under the cut.
Eligibility
This exchange is for small fandoms only! Your fandom is eligible if it has <1000 completed fics on AO3. Fics are counted towards that total only if they are in English, complete, and at least 1000 words long. So if your fandom has more than 1000 works but only half of them meet the criteria it may still be eligible!
There are a few exceptions and if your fandom is borderline you can provide evidence for why it should be included (Check out this post for more info on that)
Since a lot of my followers are comics fans: a fandom can be a single title or run of a comic if it's distinct enough. For example I nominated the We Are Robin comic run. Even though characters (like Duke Thomas) are in multiple comics and exist in larger fandoms, this run is distinct and self contained enough to be it's own fandom.
Nominations (Open now until Thursday Sept 28)
Nominations are optional, so you can still sign up even if you don't do a nomination. Just be aware that if your favorite small fandom isn't nominated it won't be included as an option for this exchange.
If you follow the link at the top of this reblog it will bring you to the top of the Yuletide Exchange profile page on AO3.
Once there click the "Yuletide 2023 Tagset" link.
Once you click the link it should take you to a new page. Click on the "Nominations" button to be taken to the nomination form.
The Nomination form looks like this:
Just fill it out with the fandom(s) you'd like to nominate and the characters from those fandoms you'd like to see.
You can nominate up to 4 fandoms with up to 4 characters for each fandom. Use the canonical tags for the fandom/characters. If there is no canonical tags just enter it as you would expect to see its canonical tag. For example I nominated the "Monkey Prince" fandom even though it does not have a recognized fandom tag.
Under Characters you can also add "worldbuilding (fandom)" for fics that expand on the world/lore/etc. without focusing on characters themselves.
Once you hit submit the mods will review the submission to double check that your fandoms are eligible and if they are they will be added to the list of fandoms for the exchange.
Sign Ups (Friday Oct 13-Saturday Oct 21)
To sign up all you need is to be 18 years old and have an AO3 account!
I'll add photos once Sign ups are open in October but I'll give you the rundown of how it works here. (And here's the AO3 tutorial on signing up for events like this with visuals)
On Oct 13, a sign up link will appear on the Yuletide 2023 profile page (linked above). It will also be linked on the Dreamwidth page. I will also try to link in this post.
The link will take you to the form where you can fill out your Requests (what you would like your gifted fic to be) and Offers (what you are willing to write)
Requests: Select 3-6 fandoms that you would like a fic of. For each fandom select from the nominated characters (up to 4). If you don't specify characters then your writer can choose any of them.
There will also be a space for "Optional details" where you can specify what you want to see in a fic and what you DON'T want to see. This is where you can put ships, genre preferences, triggers, squicks, prompts etc. Including Do Not Wants (DNW) like triggers and squicks will make sure that there is nothing in your gift fic that will upset you.
Offers: Select 4-10 fandoms that you are willing to write for. For each fandom select 2-20 nominated characters that you would be willing to write (Or you can chose "Any" if you are comfortable writing all nominated characters).
Bucket Offers can be made if there are many fandoms where you are comfortable writing Any characters. You can offer 9 fandoms plus one Bucket Offer of additional fandoms. (I wouldn't recommend doing this for your first exchange but it is an option)
Once you submit your sign up form it will appear on your AO3 profile.
You can click on this button and edit your sign up form at any point before the sign ups close.
Assignments (Sent out by Monday Oct 23)
Once sign ups close you will be matched up with another person based on your Requests and Offers. Matching is done by fandom and by character to find the best match.
When Assignments go out you will get an email with the details of your assignment. This will essentially be the Request portion of your match's sign up form. If you don't get an email or if it gets deleted/eaten by the Spam filter, the Assignment (and all the details) will appear on your AO3 profile.
The person you are writing a fic for will most likely NOT be the person writing a fic for you. It's like a Secret Santa/White Elephant gift exchange--It's supposed to be a secret!
Posting (deadline is Monday Dec 18)
When you finish your story you can click on your Assignment tab. Beside the assignment will be 2 buttons: "Fulfill" and "Default".
Default is for if you can't complete the fic in time (Pinch Hitters will then take over to ensure the person you were matched with still gets a gift). The Default deadline is Dec 11.
If you click the "Fulfill" button you will be taken to the posting form. Just add in your story and metadata as you usually would when uploading a new story, but just double check that it is included in the Yuletide 2023 collection and that your recipient's name is correct (both should be autofilled if you do it this way).
You may also click "Post a New Work" on your main profile page and add in the story that way. Just make sure that it is included in the Yuletide 2023 collection and that your recipient's name is correct.
When you hit "Post", the work will go up but it will be an unrevealed Mystery Work. Others will not be able to see it on your Works page but you will. You can still go in and edit it anytime before the deadline, but no one will be able to read it until the collection is revealed on Dec 25.
Reveals (Story reveal on Dec 25 and Author reveal on Jan 1)
On Christmas morning all the stories will be revealed, though the author will remain a mystery. Recipients will get a notification that they have a gift and they will be able to read it as a special gift to them. It will be available for anyone in the fandom to read and comment on at that time.
On New Year's day, the authors will be revealed. This is when you can finally chat about your story, crosspost it, and show your enthusiasm for what you've written!
And that's everything! This got super long but I hope it helps demystify the process for anyone new to the exchange! Good Luck and I hope you enjoy Yuletide!
@cerealboxlore and @zorilleerrant I know you both mentioned maybe being interested so this one's for you!
Yuletide 2023
Hey y'all!
So I have (perhaps foolishly) been thinking about doing the Yuletide fic exchange again this year and thought that I should share it with all of you!
What is it?
Yuletide is a multi-fandom fic exchange that takes place every year around the holidays. It's for small fandoms with less than 1000 completed fics on AO3. (Find out if your favorite fandom is eligible here!)
When is it?
Nominations are open now! If you are a part of an eligible fandom you have until Thursday September 28 to nominate them. It's very simple, just list the fandom's name and up to four characters from that fandom you would like to see in a fic. You can nominate up to four fandoms if you have multiple that fit the criteria!
Sign-ups to participate happen October 13-21, where you can list which of the eligible fandoms you would like to write for (and which ones you would like your own gift to be from!) Once you're matched up you will have until December 18 to finish your fic!
If you want to know more about Yuletide and how it works go here!
I had a lot of fun doing this exchange last year and would love to have more people join us this year!
EDIT: Here's the link to the rules on AO3 for anyone who isn't sure how to navigate Dreamwidth.
#ask me whatever you want y'all#yuletide 2023#fic exchange#Lots of info but it's not as complicated as it looks on the surface#I'm open to answering any other questions too#It's a lot of fun I swear
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#10 Renegade Niece
i’m treating myself because I liked writing this and I wrote an impossibly long essay :,)
Word count: 5,294
Characters: Roden, Jaron, Ayvar (Original character), Jamie Todd (Original character), Merry (Original character), Nila
Notes: Edited and my goodness I just loved writing this. Also I forgot to put in lines for the last two submissions and I’m so sorry. There is one important vibe that I’m going to discuss; consider how it feels when your pet begins chewing something they’re no supposed to, and when you tell them to stop, they start chewing faster leaving you no choice but to run at them.
Sleep wasn’t something that Roden excelled at. He fell asleep whenever and wherever he did.
And it just so happened that this time, he’d fallen asleep with his head on his desk.
“Rise and shine!” Bellowed an all too familiar voice, successfully bringing a wave of sound into the once silent office.
Startled, Roden lurched backwards, his chair tipping dangerously backwards until it hit the floor, taking him with it. He shut his eyes. “Good morning Jaron.”
“There’s business to discuss, we can’t have you sleeping.”
“I know, Jaron, I know. Give me a moment, I already have a list of things I need to do.”
Although Jaron was standing at the opposite end of the room, Roden could sense his smug grin. Jaron cleared his throat. “I only wake you this early because I have to ask a favor.”
“And that is?” Roden asked, sincerely hoping it had nothing to do with waxing the hair off of his legs. Jaron had proposed that once, and every member of the king’s circle learned the importance of keeping Jaron occupied with trivial matters in addition to his political duties.
Late morning light glowed all around the room. Roden blinked several times as his head began to plant itself in the waking world. Jaron was dressed in his usual plain clothing, lucky him.
Roden wanted to scrub his teeth clean.
He hated it when he slept in his office.
“I, ah, told Mott to take it easy today because of the events from two nights ago. He has a few reports that need to be looked over and signed.”
“How many reports are there?”
It didn’t actually matter, Roden had every intention of doing them anyways
Jaron scoffed, “I don’t know the answer to that.”
“And when do they need to be finished?”
“Tonight, if possible.”
Roden groaned, and dragged himself to his feet, pulling a piece of paper from his forehead. “Alright, consider them done. But I won’t be able to spar today, Jaron, I have too many things to do.”
“It’s not a problem,” Jaron scratched the back of his head. He looked tired. “Feall is convinced that we have a vital playing piece in our custody, the girl who was captured the night he was attacked.”
The details from that night were still fresh in Roden’s mind.
He went over them as often as he could, always trying to find connections. The girl who’d been taken into custody, a member of the Faola, was somebody Roden had met before. She’d been in the Vaults one night when Roden was on patrol, and allegedly she was assisting another member of her gang in saving a trio of children from a horrific fate.
She’d told him her name: Ayvar.
Ayvar with scarlet hair who bent the rules to help other people.
It was hard to believe that somebody who would brave the Vaults would be driven to cut the head off of another human being.
There was something not quite right about the situation.
“I can see smoke coming out of your ears, are you thinking?”
“Shut up, Jaron.”
“Definitely thinking. Be careful, it’s dangerous.”
“Thank you for your concern,” Roden pinched the bridge of his nose for a split second. “Have you received any information about Queen Danika’s representatives?”
Hesitation visibly weighed on Jaron’s every move. He finally nodded. “They’ve been combing through nearby towns, and will be here tomorrow. I suspect that they will want to interview the girl who attacked Feall.”
“I told Amarinda she was allowed to visit Ayvar if she wanted, I think she’d have more progress than a group of investigators.”
“Good move, is it wrong to say I’m curious about the results?”
“So long as nobody is hurt in the process, I think it’s fine to want to know how it all ends,” Roden gestured to the door. “I’m going to check on her if you’d like to come with me.”
“Amarinda? I don’t think she’d like to be-”
“Ayvar, I meant. I’d be responsible if something happened to her.”
Jaron stepped out of Roden’s office, and combed his hand through his unruly hair. “You think she’s innocent?”
“I try to believe everyone isn’t as bad as everyone says until it can be proven true,” Roden shrugged. He rubbed his eyes.
The dungeons in the castle were odd, particularly because they provided a decent amount of space in each cell. Roden had seen all too many dungeons crafted out of caves and tunnels only big enough for a child. The scent of moldy food was a smell Roden would never come to appreciate. Jaron laughed at him when he stepped away from the mangy guard dog.
There was no telling what would happen if the mongrel bit him.
Roden tried not to think about how he’d die, but he certainly didn’t want his cause of death to be because of a nasty, dirty mutt.
Ayvar had been placed in the last cell. She’d braided her flaming hair around her head, likely to keep it out of the dirt. When Roden and Jaron approached, she sat straight up, her hands cradling her knees to her chest.
“Everything been alright?” Roden asked, crossing his arms over his chest.
“I suppose,” Ayvar frowned. “I’d rather not be here.”
“I’d rather that you didn’t attack my friends.” Jaron’s biting tone caused her to flinch.
“You don’t really think I was stupid enough to do that, right?”
“I’ve seen plenty of people doing stupid things.”
Roden nodded in agreement. Just the other day, he’d watched Merry shove herself into a barrel and roll off of a bridge into the Roving River. He’d also seen Jaron almost get away with sledding down the grand staircase in the throne room. However, Mott had been there to save the day.
But that unfortunately didn’t stop Jaron from trying to do it again.
Ayvar scowled, “It. Wasn’t. Me.”
“But you were there,” Roden pointed out.
“I was there because I didn’t think the plan would go through!”
“So you knew there was a plan. Who thought of it, if it wasn’t you?”
“I-,” Ayvar jumped to her feet, fire blazing in her eyes. “It’s probably a false name. Goes by all sorts of nicknames, we started calling her Patches. But the arbitrator is a woman, like me.”
“I hate false names,” Jaron mused.
“Ironic,” Roden noted.
"You have to believe me when I say that I wasn't responsible," Ayvar's voice was rising. "I don't care what anyone else says, it wasn't my fault!"
Her voice echoed through the dungeon, and received a bark of disapproval from the guard hound.
Jaron inhaled, "If what you say is true, then we'll release you, I can promise you that."
"It is true and I'll prove it. If Harlowe won't listen to me, then I'll go to Feall. He and I fought our patched enemy together."
"I do recall you saying your patched enemy was actually your friend, at one point," Roden noted. He was still getting used to having a surname to claim.
"That's not true anymore, otherwise I wouldn't have been left in here."
"I'm sorry."
"I don't want your pity."
"Then you won't get our company either," Jaron shot back as he walked away from Ayvar's cell.
Roden stared at Ayvar, but left before she could throw any words at him. She went back to sitting in the corner, and said nothing as footsteps rang through the quiet dungeon.
A courtier was waiting for them halfway down the steps, and promptly dragged Jaron away to attend a meeting with King Oberson. Roden seized his chance to return to his chambers and scrub his teeth and face.
He'd almost managed to shave when he heard the clatter of stones from the courtyard.
Through his window, Roden could see a group of pock marked boys, their sizes varying, but their intentions the same: Torment Ayvar by throwing insults and rocks into her cell.
Abandoning the razor, Roden left his chambers, tugged a doublet over his head, and prepared himself for shooing away a gaggle of bored brats.
Too much had happened during the past few weeks. The stone-throwing boys were added to Roden's long long list of things that annoyed him.
One of the boys stood out from the rest, Jamie Todd. He'd thrown the first stone. Roden recognized him. Jamie was among the boys who were desperately hoping to somehow gain a knighthood. Hoping to mean something more.
That wouldn't happen so long as he was throwing stones at a girl in a cell.
Was having a little bit of peace in the courtyard too much to ask?
A loud whoop erupted from the boys, one of the stones had probably found its mark. Jamie waved his arms above his head as he did an odd victory dance. They'd been clever enough to draft up a little song:
When Daftie Ayvie passed away,
Whadya think they done?
Chopped her up a fishin’ bait:
Copper for a ton!
Devils have the guards on patrol who let the stones be-
A newcomer had joined the group. A girl. A head shorter than half of the boys. Much shorter than Jamie Todd, who was almost the size of Mott.
Mangled hair, holes in her chemise's shoulders. Merry had come to pick a bone.
"Fe-fi-fo fum!" Merry jabbed her finger at Jamie. "I smell the stink of a big boy's bum!"
"Hey!" Jamie cried, all of his attention glued to Merry.
Roden should have seen it coming.
Merry jabbed her elbow into Jamie's stomach, and down, down, down he went. The other boys scrambled away as Merry grabbed Jamie by the ears.
"She's going to tear them clean off!"
"Get some help!"
"My ears! Don't! You'll rip them-!
"Can't help it! Your ears are wonderfully handy!" Merry taunted. "They're like mug handles!"
Roden dashed across the courtyard as Merry slammed Jamie's head into the ground, resulting in his howls echoing across the courtyard. She triumphantly demanded an apology for throwing stones at Ayvar, but none came.
"Somebody help me!" Jamie bellowed, moments before Merry cracked her head against his.
"See the lovely stars, Jamie!"
"She's kilt me!"
"You're going to wish you'd been kilt you mangy, slimy, son of a-!"
In Merry's hubris, she'd forgotten about pinning down Jamie's hands. He swung his fist into the side of her head. Although she wobbled, she didn't topple over.
"I see a bit of brains dribbling-!" Smack! "-out of your ear!"
"Get off of me! Help! She's kilt me!"
"Pity your mother didn't cook you longer," Merry snipped, prepping to bash Jamie's head into the cobblestones again.
Roden finally managed to wedge his arms between Merry and Jamie, while Lieutenant Alistair picked up Merry by the waist, and dragged her off of Jamie. Roden nodded his thanks as Merry cursed and kicked and Jaimie wept as he covered his ears. He was convinced that his brain was bleeding out from his nose.
"I'll take care of the kids," Roden noted, motioning to the large fountain in the middle of the courtyard.
"Yes sir!" Alistair boomed as he somehow managed to keep Merry from escaping to beat the other boys as well.
"Stand up," said Roden as he let go of Jaimie. He then instructed him to follow his finger as he moved it back and forth in front of Jamie's eyes.
He wasn't sure how rattled Jamie's brains were.
"I'm kilt," he wailed. "I'm a member of the undead. I’ll never be a knight now!"
"Not quite, but I hope you've learned something."
"I learned that I hate girls!"
"You'll have a lonely life then, I suppose. Don't throw stones at people worse off than you Jamie, it's not what a knight would do."
Jamie wiped his nose, which had finally stopped bleeding. "I'm- I'm sorry we were- we were just bored."
"Don't apologize to me. You have my permission to be inspected by the castle physician. I'll have my lieutenant escort you."
If he hadn't just been smacked around, Roden was certain Jamie would've fallen to his knees with gratitude. Speaking to the captain of the guard and being around Sir Alistair Derforgall in one day? It was any aspiring soldier's dream.
Roden had been in those shoes once. Idolizing Carthya's heroes.
But you couldn't be a hero and throw stones at prisoners in cells.
Alistair had seated Merry on the edge of the fountain. She crossed her arms. “I’m too angry to give a genuine apology right now, but I do feel bad, so I’m sorry. Give me a few hours before I have to say it to Jamie. I don’t like giving empty apologies.”
“Weren’t you just telling me about being safe while throwing a punch?” Roden asked.
“That’s because I’d- gah, don’t remind me.”
“Aren’t you supposed to be at the Dragon’s Keep?”
“Ayvar is my friend, I came to check on her,” Merry shrugged. “Dawn gave me twenty minutes, but I’ve used up that time in, ah, not very smart ways. Did you forget to shave?”
Roden held completely still as Merry trailed both of her fingers across his stubbled face. “I was in a hurry.”
“I kind of like it.”
“Really?”
“I mean, I just like you, shaved or unshaved.”
“You’re a grisly sight. Best mop you up before you return,” he grinned. Roden then pointed to his left eyebrow, where a long, thin scar started just above his eyebrow and dipped down to the top of his cheekbone. “I’ve had a few head wounds myself.”
A smile tugged at Merry’s mouth, and she visibly tried to fight it with a frown. “I suppose we’ll match.”
“We’ll have to see.”
“There’s no point to life if I don’t have a scar that makes people wonder if I’m secretly a pirate.”
“Are you secretly a pirate?” Roden pulled a spare handkerchief from his doublet pocket, “I suppose it’s my turn to clean you up, would you prefer your own spit or fountain water?”
“I’d prefer your spit, actually.”
“I’m going to pretend like you didn’t say that.”
“Because it makes you uncomfortable?”
“Quite the contrary, I think there’s a better way to exchange spit than-,” Roden cleared his throat. “I take that back. It does make me uncomfortable.”
It seemed that Merry was uncomfortable too. Her face had gone redder than the blood dripping from the cut on her forehead. “I’ll take water. It’s, ah, really warm.”
She was right, the summer morning sun was beating down on the two of them. Roden cupped the unbloodied side of her face as gingerly as he could. He wet the cloth, knelt on the ground in front of her, and forced himself not to grin as he began wiping the blood off of her forehead.
The frown faltered.
“So,” Merry said.
It wasn’t exactly a question, it was more of an invitation. There was no obligation for Roden to say anything if he wanted to. He was allowed to speak about anything that he chose to do. He could talk about the situation with Ayvar. He could talk about how his niece, Nila, wanted to have a picnic for her tenth birthday and that he didn’t know what to get her. He could talk about how he’d begun to see his childhood friend’s death in his dreams.
How he feared that there was something hiding in plain sight.
Something awful.
She was giving him a choice.
And that made him want to tell her everything.
“I have extra reports I need to file tonight,” Roden said as he wet a new portion of his handkerchief. “But I’ve spent too much time in my office. Makes me lonely.”
“Don’t your friends pay attention to you?” Merry arched her unbloodied eyebrow.
He shrugged, “From time to time. They don’t tell me colorful stories about fish hitting my face.”
That made her smile.
“By the way, I never thanked you for the coin you gave me. Where’s it from? I don’t recognize the design.”
“It’s from my home, but it’s not accepted here. Figured I’d give you a trinket. Have you considered getting a pet mountain cat to keep you company?”
“Unfortunately, the royal mountain cat keeper is fresh out of them.”
Merry’s eyes drifted shut, and Roden did his best not to think of the way her body relaxed as he continued supporting her. “Why not come to the Dragon’s Keep? It’s the slowest day of the week, I can help you. I can even promise extra lemon cream tarts.”
“Would I have to share?”
“With me, of course.”
“Promises you’ll make sure it’s a fair share?”
Merry pressed a bruised hand to her heart, “I never lie, Captain Harlowe.”
He hoped she didn’t see his ears beginning to burn. Roden managed to clear away the drying blood on Merry’s face, and ordered the nearest page to get strips of gauze. “I, ah, I’m going to make sure the wound doesn’t bleed through. Is that alright?”
“I only ask that you make me look as much like a plague victim as possible,” Merry was fiddling with her hands.
“I’ll see what I can do.”
To his surprise, when Roden drew away from Merry’s face, she pressed his hand back into place. “No wait, I’m hoping I can siphon away your extreme battle abilities.”
“Not quite sure how true that is.”
“I told you before, I don’t lie.”
“Not quite sure how true that is either.”
Once again, her face flushed bright red. Merry shoved his hand away, “Thanks, ah, uh, thanks for helping me.”
“It’s only fair.” Roden scratched the back of his neck.The page returned with a small roll of gauze. Roden began setting strips of it on the horizontal gash on Merry’s forehead. “You should probably come up with a story about why you look like a plague victim.”
“I’m thinking that I had three eyes at one point, but I tragically lost my third eye while hunting for a golden potato.”
“Not quite what I was expecting, but I’ll take it. Is there more to it?”
“Do you like hearing me talk, Captain?”
“I’ve told you it’s alright to call me by my name,” Roden said, deftly avoiding her question.
She patted the side of his face, “Captain, my friend, at one point I had a third eye, and it helped me see into the ground. I could find all sorts of buried treasure, making me the most valued person in the Eranbole sea. . .”
Words of third eyes and buried treasure fell short on Roden’s ears. As Merry continued weaving her grand story about pirates and sea monsters, his gaze fell on a curious mark on her bare shoulder.
A jagged scar.
As he finished setting the last piece of gauze on Merry’s cut, he found himself brushing his thumb over the scar, wondering where it came from.
Scars carried stories, whether good or bad.
What had Merry done to get a scar on her shoulder? There were others near it, many of them were hiding underneath her printed chemise. Marks of the past. All pale and pink against her skin.
Merry went completely silent, and Roden flinched once he realized what he’d done.
Don’t look, don’t look, don’t look.
Devils have him. Roden looked right at Merry’s crimson face, stared right at those mausoleum grey eyes.
Don’t be the first to look away, don’t be the first to look away-
Suddenly the cobblestones became very interesting.
“I, ah, I’m-,” she stuttered, both of her hands going to tug on her earlobes.
Roden all but jumped to his feet, “I have to go now.”
“I don’t think so, I’m not quite finished with our conversation.”
Roden rubbed the back of his neck, desperate to be away from his mistake.
But he couldn’t bring himself to walk away.
“Treat me like a princess, Roden, please,” Merry said, bouncing back from the awkward moment. She held out her hand, palm down, expectant.
A series of scars were visible on her third and fourth fingers, just below the nails. Roden forced himself not to look too long, and took Merry by the hand, “My apologies, lady.”
In a grand motion, Merry waved her hand across the open air, “No apologies are needed sir knight. You’ll find I am quite spotted all over, and not from freckles.”
“I’m really sorry if-,” He began, but Merry was one step ahead of him.
“No, no, don’t be sorry, it’s really alright. I got that scar as a child. My favorite method of travel was jumping rock to rock, and I missed my target once.”
“I’m sure all toads everywhere envied your skill.”
“Oh they did, trust me, they did. I’d ah, I’d tell you more . . But you’ll have to forgive me for leaving so soon, Dawn’s going to have my head if I’m late.”
He didn’t want to admit that he didn’t like watching her leave.
----------------------------------------------
Nila sat on his desk, swinging her legs. Her long golden hair had been pinned on her head, and yet despite the obvious effort that had been put into it, several strands had managed to escape. Dirt stains pooled at her elbows.
She was doing a wondrous job holding a stack of papers for Roden.
“I found a cool feather today, but I dropped it in the river,” Nila mused, a slight frown appearing on her rosy face. “It had stripes.”
“A striped feather, you say?” Roden made a face.
“Black and white, I thought it would look cool as a mast for a stick ship, but I got so excited about it, I dropped it.”
“Then I’ll have to help you find another one.”
Nila tapped her boot heel against the desk, “I’m free on every second day of the week, but only in the afternoons. I can fit you into my schedule.”
“You have a schedule now, do you?” He caught himself chuckling. “I would gladly take any available time that I can.”
Everywhere, there were reports hiding. Roden managed to gather all of Mott’s reports, but unfortunately, had managed to lose track of half of his own. He pawed through every drawer he could, every shelf and cabinet.
If it weren’t for Nila keeping track of what had been found and what hadn’t, he would’ve wasted much more time.
How could he let himself get so disorganized?
Roden ran his hands through his hair, “I think that’s all we’re going to find.”
“I can take a turn looking,” Nila offered. She grinned, a pair of dimples making their appearance. “You’ve obviously got something else on your mind.”
“I don’t- I, ah, everything’s under control.”
Although everything didn’t really feel like it was under control. Roden once again ran his hands through his hair, thinking of anything he might’ve missed. Several hours had passed since he’d last seen Merry. It wouldn’t be long before sunset.
“Are you meeting somebody?” Asked Nila, her boot beating out a new rhythm. “Are you going on patrol again?”
“No, no,” Roden said, walking from his desk to the door. “I mean, yes, I’m going to be with a friend of mine. No patrolling for me though, that’s tomorrow night.”
“That’s interesting. Much more interesting than my evening, anyway.”
“I thought you had a busy schedule, sounds pretty exciting to me.”
“Being busy doesn’t mean I’m having fun. Where are you going?”
“Sounds like you’re planning on trying to come with me. . .”
Nila frowned as deeply as she could. “I’m just asking!”
As he paced back and forth, Roden smiled. He was walking to the beat of Nila’s boot hitting the desk. That drew a grin out of her once he mentioned it to her.
He loved being with Nila. She was charming and bursting with life, and made his day a little bit brighter. In time, he saw her as more of a little sister than a niece.
There were many things Roden would always regret.
Things like never knowing his dead brother; Nila’s father.
Too many opportunities had been lost, and Roden was determined not to lose any more precious moments. He’d been cheated out of years and years of memories.
It was time to make new ones.
But he wasn’t sure if taking a ten year old girl to a tavern was one of them.
“Please, please, please, please, please take me with you,” Nila begged. “I don’t want to have to take tea with Lady Orlaine’s whatever they are.”
“Lady Orlaine’s wards?” Roden offered.
“Yes! Them! They’re mean to me, dreadfully boring too. I call them the Greys. Because they make everything grey around them, get it?”
Roden took the numerous papers from Nila and shoved them into a satchel. He’d have to depend on Merry for ink, he didn’t trust himself not to spill any as he walked across Drylliad.
He wouldn’t be able to know if the Dragon’s Keep was truly empty until he got there, and he’d rather not risk taking Nila to a place not quite appropriate for a child.
She took the rejection well, however, Roden wished he’d been able to bring her with him.
The regret was even worse the moment Roden stepped into the Dragon's Keep, only to find that it was as empty as Merry claimed it was.
Aside from the old man strumming a lute in the corner, the only sound was a ghost of a conversation from the back.
Dawn was behind the counter, her grey streaked hair piled into a bun on top of her head.
Another barmaid was sitting in the corner beside a young man. No sign of Merry.
"Captain! It's nice to see you!" Dawn called, waving her cloth in greeting.
"It's nice to be here," Roden countered with a smile.
She turned around, and retrieved a large tankard, "Are you looking for a drink?"
"Oh! No, no, I'm looking for a person, actually. It's Merry, actually, she wanted to talk."
"I'm sure she did, I'm sure she did. Merry! It's rude to keep a guest waiting!"
The conversation grew louder, louder, louder, until finally, Merry came strutting out. She’d changed her chemise, this one was green and hid her scarred shoulder. A patterned scarf rested neatly over her hair and behind her ears.
She pointed at the mass of gauze on her head, “Still in one piece!”
“I’m not surprised, you can hold your own,” Roden grinned. Now comfortable, he set his paper filled satchel on the wooden countertop, and perched on a tall stool.
“You should see her fight a door, it’s quite frightening,” teased Dawn.
“They are the bane of my existence.” Merry stared hard at the front door, and shook her fist at it before bursting into a series of snickers.
“A truly noble quest.”
Merry snatched a used tankard, and began scrubbing at the insides. Her smile faltered, “How’s Jamie Todd?”
“He’s alright, just a little concerned that he was caught throwing stones at a person.”
“Good, that’s good. You sure he’s fine?”
“Saw him myself a few hours ago,” Roden said. He retrieved a few reports, and set them on the counter. “Do you have-?”
“Ink? Right here,” Merry reached below the counter. “And we have a variety of writing tools to choose from too.”
“Don’t use the quill!” Dawn ordered from the other end of the bar. The door opened and closed. “Take care of that guest!”
The glass Merry had been scrubbing at clinked against the counter. Her brows screwed together, “I’ll take care of it.”
“What are you-,” Roden began, but Merry snapped her fingers near his face. He brushed her hands away, “I know, I know, I need to get my work done.”
“I’ll check back in on you in a moment, have that other guest to see,” Merry leaned over the bar, and smoothed her hand over Roden’s head.
He glared at the first report waiting to be finished. Check the details. Signature here, signature there. Next report. Check the details. Signature here, signature there, and so on and so forth. He caught a few snippets from Merry’s conversation with the new guest.
Something about lemon cream tarts.
Saints, he really wanted one of-
No! He had to do a report first!
Report first, tart later!
Merry set a hand on his shoulder, “Your handwriting.”
“I know, I know, it’s messy,” Roden shrugged.
“I was going to say that I like it, sir knight.”
Oh.
She disappeared behind the bar, reappearing moments later with a lemon cream tart in each hand. Roden received his first, much to his delight, and technically, he did manage to finish two reports.
He deserved a tart.
“-I completely understand! Court life is horrifically boring,” Merry said, her voice barely audible above the lute strings.
“I’m glad somebody gets it!” Chirped the guest, their voice oddly familiar.
But not familiar enough to draw his attention away from his blasted reports.
The lemon cream tart made it easier to bear.
Snippets of the conversation still drifted into Roden’s atmosphere. Merry laughed, “And is there anything else I can get you?”
“No thank you, but I do appreciate that you asked me,” came the reply.
And then Merry’s hand was back on his shoulder, asking him if there was anything she could do to help. Unless she was good at forgery, there wasn’t much she could do.
Roden scribbled through report after report, firmly aware that Merry was watching his every move.
He managed to finish the tart just as he finished his first pile of reports.
“And onto the next one,” Roden mumbled.
“Ah, ah, ah, take a tiny break, Captain,” Merry chided. She set her hands on Roden’s, “One stack is worth a victory celebration.”
“Do I get another tart?”
“Possibly, unless you’d prefer a pie.”
Pies were good, when baked properly.
Merry’s hands were cool on his palms.
Cool on his battle torn hands.
They fit too well in his own. A little too nicely. It was impossible to timidly turn his palms up, impossible not to hold Merry’s rough fingers.
He supposed he preferred that to a tart.
And a pie.
“Why are you holding hands with him?” Asked the other guest from right behind Roden.
He jumped, his eyes flying to the voice’s owner.
Only to find Nila with a little bit of lemon cream still on her top lip.
“Oh, uh, because-,” Merry stuttered, however, Roden had a better prepared retort.
“What are you doing here?”
Nila shrugged, “I was bored, so I followed you.”
“And you saw her come in, but didn’t tell me?” Roden asked, turning his attention to Merry.
She made a face, and clasped her hands behind her back. “I only did what I was told.”
“I wanted to surprise you, mostly so I could prove that it’s perfectly acceptable for me to go with you to things,” Nila pointed out. She clambered onto the stool beside Roden. “And I’m very helpful. I can read through your reports. All you’d have to do is sign.”
“Doesn’t mean you’d understand what’s going on,” noted Roden.
“That’s not important, all that matters is that everything is spelled correctly.”
Merry nodded, “She does have a point.”
A smile spread across his face, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t be rid of it, but he did manage to contain it to a slight smirk.
He handed a stack of papers to Nila.
Every so often, Roden glanced up to make sure Merry was still near, and watched as she cleaned tankard after tankard.
She beamed at him each time she caught him looking.
And all he could think about was the way her cool hands felt when they rested on his own.
#roden#ocs#prince jaron#fic friday#fic Friday except its a thursday#this#was literally#too fun#shamelessly fluffy#also nila is absolutely the best#I love her#shes a chaotic blonde child#wait#nila = cosette from les mis confirmed#the ascendance series#the ascendance trilogy#the false prince
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don’t ask me my ideal spn ending because it literally changes daily
#on monday they defeat god replace him w billie + amara + rowena ala casgirls fic and tfw all focus on healing they make their own ending#on tragedy tuesday all the afterlives go away sam and dean drive the impala off a cliff and die#wednesday weird girl wednesday they stay dead except for when the wayward girls bring them back in a b plot of a wayward sisters ep#thursday dean rescues cas from the empty and they make a total mess of it think on labor levels of miscommunication#on friday dean rescues cas from the empty and dean confesses right away and its TOO fanfic soft. gives me internalized hellerphobia tbh#saturday is chuck won truthing they have to break out of fake heaven and break cas out of the empty too and re defeat chuck for real#sunday?? sammy sunday?? dean stays dead and sam has to cope with grief he finds eileen he goes back to school#or maybe he goes and finds rowena and fulfills his destiny as boytoy of hell#anyways#ellie shhh
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Prompt List 2022
As per popular vote, the event will be running in September this year - specific dates being the 18th through the 24th. Each day will have two different prompts to choose from - as always, please keep in mind the following about the prompts and the event in general:
You can choose one prompt or both per day, or you can skip a day. There is no minimum or maximum participation requirement
You can take the prompts as literally or as loosely as you like
This is a tumblr event. We will not be making an AO3 collection, nor will we be on any other platform. You are, however, more than welcome to host your content on other platforms and share a link on tumblr for us to promote.
Please review our rules and regulations post - we've even made it cleaner for you this year
We've also updated our FAQ
No bashing of any kind, of ships, content, or people. Don't be a fucking bully, you'll get your ass banned and blocked so fast
Please review the unqualified ships list for this year before you start creating
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Sunday 18th: Badass Kunoichi | Loss, grief, and death
Monday 19th: Role Reversal | Of Monsters and Men
Tuesday 20th: Song fic | Quote One*
Wednesday 21st: Fairytale retelling | Whump Wheel
Thursday 22nd: Enemies of the State | Fluff Roulette
Friday 23rd: Happily Ever After/No Happy Ending | Quote Two**
Saturday 24th: Free Day | Eternal Dreams
Quotes, as well as tag rules breakdown, below the cut
*"The new dawn blooms as we free it. For there is always light if only we're brave enough to see it, if only we're brave enough to be it." - Amanda Gorman
**"Of all the liars in the world, sometimes the worst are our own fears." - Rudyard Kipling
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Tag which day your content is for using 'day one', 'day two', etc. That should be its own tag
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Unlike previous years, Mods will Not be putting the content creator's name in our tags when we reblog this year. As the event grows and the mod team does not, this is simply something that is unnecessary and added extra work for us.
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Heaven Is In A Shortcake {vi}
have another chapter/appetizer~
disclaimer: The Gray Man and the characters are NOT MINE, even the reader. I only own the plot and the reader's character lol. pictures are NOT MINE, only the edited version of it for the fic (msg me if you're the owner), credits to the rightful owners and to weheartit + canva. additionally, i am not a subic/zambales native so my apologies for any wrong, locations, or languages.
Six x F!Reader / Courtland Gentry x Fem!Reader
warnings: moderate swear words. some filipino words. slow burn. fluff. comedy if you use a magnifying glass. trust issues. culture shock. check word count.
CHAPTER SELECTION in the ✨Masterlist✨ Chapter 5 - c'mon vamonos, find me in the masterlist Chapter 6 - this is it [next chapter link will be posted below for suspense & convenience hehe]
word count: 2.9k (N/N) = nickname *Kiara = Claire *Kurt = Court *cover names | reader doesn't know (except you do know #wreck the 4th wall)
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It’s been a week since Claire furtively gave you a two-way portable radio. And because she had too much fun talking with you (verbatim), Claire has revised the schedule of your secret conversations.
[Mondays + Tuesdays] 15:00-15:30
[Wednesdays] 13:30-14:00
[Thursdays] 21:30-22:00
[Saturdays] 23:30-00:00
Claire has omitted the Friday schedule since that’s when they have dinner at the cafe. Except yesterday, which is Friday, the father-daughter duo didn’t arrive. You practically broke the rules and tried contacting Claire as soon as you got home from work, but to no avail. The girl was radio silent since Thursday, it made you quite worried— and you still are.
You glimpse down at your wristwatch, 21:58. Laughter erupts from the group of friends as they simultaneously rise from their booth, you instinctively regard them and then glance at the Betty Boop cat clock on the wall near the windows, still 21:58. The cat's permanent sneer appears to be mocking you, and you can hear it verbalizing its ridicule with every sideways tick of its eyes and tail—
Tick— why —tock— so —tick— wor —tock— ried?
Tick— you're —tock— just —tick— an —tock— acquaintance.
One of the customers catches your gaze just before you ignite the laser beam to destroy the feline clock. "Thank you!" she says, waving.
You stammer. "Oh, thank you! Come again!"
The rest of the group give their gratitude in scattered replies. You keep the toothy grin even as they exit out of the cafe, disappearing from view. 'They're probably the last customer this Saturday,' you sigh and immediately lift the corners of your mouth up. 'So what, right?'
You decide that by 22:15, if they aren't any customers yet, you'll close up shop. You grab a tray from its station, stride to the last customers' booth, and start cleaning up. Muro is in the kitchen with Mindy, he’s been there after the two of you served the customers’ order. You grimace bitterly and decide to intervene in the couple’s alone time. Opening your mouth, you’re about to holler for them, but something moves in your peripheral vision.
You turn, expecting the bells to chime as a customer enters, you’re startled to see icy blue orbs piercing into your eyes. “Kurt?” you hesitantly wave a hand up.
Court glances away for a full three second, scrutinizing something at the parking lot, he then sidles in. If it weren’t for the bells, you wouldn’t have heard him, because the way he enters is very discreet: no extra movements, light steps, and guarded posture. He’s like a ghost.
“Good evening,” you smile, eyes flickering behind him. “Where’s Kiara?”
“In the car, sleeping,” he replies quickly and stands beside the door, glancing out the windows, he adjusts the cap on his head. You notice it’s navy blue with gold outlines instead of the usual black or gray.
You carefully approach him. “So.. it’ll be take-out, huh?”
“Yeah, here’s our order.” he hands you a piece of paper, along with 500 pesos.
“Alright, this will take about fifteen minutes or so.”
“That’s fine.”
“I’ll have Muro help me in delivering it to your car.
“No!”
You recoil, astonished that his voice can raise two octaves higher, and glance over to the kitchen doors. But your co-workers don’t seem to have heard Court. “Okay..?” you watch him swearing under his breath as he lowers his gaze, “I’ll just wave at you from here?”
He nods. “You can tell me through the radio if it’s done.” and lifts his eyes to look at you, and you spot remnants of remorse.
You furrow your brows. “Radio?”
“The walkie-talkie that Cl— Kiara gave you,” he pauses, “I found out about it.”
“Oh..” you blink, "Did you ground her? Is that why you two weren't here yesterday?"
"Yes and no. I only grounded her for two days, and then we went on a 3-day trip."
"Really? But when did you find out?"
"Monday morning."
'Oh.. Kiara found a way to get another radio, for sure.'
With the way Court is sighing after he sees the look on your face, you're sure that he knows what you're thinking, which means that it's true— and he did nothing to stop his daughter.
"A three-day trip, huh?" you say, grinning.
"Yeah, nothing special. Just a gesture for reprimanding her," he replies and shortly gives a polite smile.
You want to ask about their trip, but with the way Court is avoiding your gaze, you know he doesn't want to indulge you.
"That's sweet of you," you chuckle, glancing at the paper containing their orders. "I'll go ahead and cash this in now."
"Yeah, yeah.. find me on channel 15, privacy code 11. Make sure no one sees you using it, are we clear?"
"Crystal!"
As you swivel around to march towards the cashier like those toy soldiers from Toy Story, you swear that you heard Court breathing a laugh. But you stop yourself from looking over your shoulder. Maybe it was just the wind— even though the door is shut.
You hear him exit the cafe as you reach the cash register. After typing in the orders, you head into the kitchen to give the paper to Mindy. She’s about to ask where the father-daughter duo is, but you’re already out the swinging doors. You then type in the payment, and when the device automatically calculates the change, you press ‘ENTER’.
The receipt noisily effuses out while you prepare everything needed for the drinks: two iced strawberry green tea with chia seeds. You decide to make them once Mindy announces there’s ten minutes left before the food is ready.
“Uy?— Hoy!” Muro shouts when you’re about to pass by him in between the swinging kitchen doors, “Sa’n ka pupunta? Saka asan yung mag-ama?”
Where are you going? And where’s the father and daughter?
“Nag-hihintay sila sa labas. Huwag mo muna gawin yung drinks, matutunaw agad yung yelo!”
They’re waiting outside. Don’t make the drinks yet, the ice will immediately melt!
You weave through the kitchen, arriving in the staffroom in no time. You can practically go in and out of the cafe blindfolded. The locker door creaks when you swing it open, the keys attached to the padlock swings with a silly jingle. Rummaging through your bag, you pluck out the portable radio from the case you’ve hidden it in.
Once your locker is secured, you hastily proceed into the bathroom and lock yourself in. You power the transceiver on, switch to channel 15, and insert the privacy code. “Hello? Kurt, do you read me? Over,” you say to the device in a hushed tone and put your finger off the button.
There’s a slight crackle, signaling of a nearby transmission coming through.
“Why is a raven like a writing desk? Over.”
You blink. “Because it can produce a few notes.. though they are very flat,” and pause to chuckle, “and it is never put with the wrong end in front… Over.”
“So, you’re a Lewis Caroll fan, huh? Over.”
“Not really. I actually hated Alice in Wonderland when I was a kid. Over.”
“Seriously?— Over.”
“Uh-huh! I hated getting lost, which annoyed me ‘cuz I had no sense of direction at a young age. And it frustrated me when Alice kept going deeper into Wonderland. Over.”
Court chuckles. “Well, that is what the story is about. Alice is venturing through an unknown world like a child progressing into teenagehood. Over.”
“I know.” you reply matter-of-factly, gazing down at your Chucks, you snort. “I can relate to Alice on a molecular level.. except the blonde hair, blue eyes, and complexion. Over.”
“What about the accent?— Over.” Court prompts.
“I can’t explain myself, I’m afraid, because I’m not myself, you see. Over.”
“I think I haven’t watched the animated movie in a while, because I think you sound just like Alice.” he snickers, “Over.”
“Well, then, I’ll take that as a compliment. Over.” you say, still with the British accent.
A moment of comfortable silence shrinks the distance between you two. You feel as though Court is right beside you, but when you turn, only your reflection in the mirror is with you. Clearing your throat, you push yourself off the wall, which you just realized that you were leaning against.
“Hey, Kurt, I should go. I’ll keep the radio in my pocket, but it’ll be turned off. Over.” you say into the transceiver.
“Alright.. I’ll keep mine on, over,” he replies.
“Copy that. Over and out.”
You slip the walkie-talkie in the pocket of your shorts after powering it off. When you exit the bathroom, something flurries around your chest as though a swarm of butterflies have escaped your ribcage. Get it?— Joking aside, you shortly pat your chest in confusion and wonder about the funky feeling proliferating throughout it.
You soon forget about the internal flutterings as you help Mindy with the meals. Before you and Muro whip up the drinks, you shortly excuse yourself to the bathroom and inform Court that their orders will be ready in ten minutes.
"Why are you getting that?" Muro loudly asks as he powers up the blender, mixing the green tea with ice.
After you put little strawberry slices in the bottom of the cups and spread whipped cream around the sides, you extract the strawberry shortcake from the display cabinet. "I wanna take one of the last slices of my cake!" you reply in the same volume, packaging a slice into one box while the remaining two in another.
Muro stops the blender. "What about the two last slices?"
"..." you murmur.
"What?"
"...for.."
"Anong sinasabi mo?" What are you saying?
"Basta…"
"Sabihin mo na kase!" he shouts.
Just say it!
You explode. "It's not for me, okay!? Bakit ba nangingialam ka?!" Why are you bothering me?!
Muro's face goes from shocked to teasing in 0.3 seconds. You ignore him completely as the two of you finish up the drinks, all the while the increased temperature of your face doesn't let up.
"Want me to help or do you wanna deliver it by yourself?" says Muro, grinning wolfishly.
You retaliate by making faces and mouthing incomprehensibly. Taking the cup carrier that holds the flavorful iced teas, the straws are taped on the side of each of the drinks, you grab the large paper bag and whisk away.
Muro jogs past you, chuckling all the way to the door, which he opens for you. As a thank you, you heavily step on his foot on the way out. You grin at the symphony of curses floating behind you.
Court climbs out of the gray SUV, and you quicken your gait, albeit carefully. "I told you to call me when it's ready, so I can pick it up myself." he says when you're two feet away.
"Sorry, but that's bad service for us." you sheepishly grin, handing him the cup carrier.
You nearly recoil. When his fingers brush yours, there's a momentary jolt through your arms as though you’ve touched an electric fence— which you have once.. twice.
Court quickly scans your face, taking the paper bag next, and you flush furiously, imagining ramming your head down through the sandy ground. Even though you only nearly recoiled from the brief contact of his skin, you believe it wasn’t obvious.
‘Not to him, I guess..’ you mentally grumble.
“The change and receipt is in there,” you gesture at the paper bag, “I also put two slices of strawberry shortcake— on the house. I didn’t know what other flavors you two like.”
“Thanks.. but you didn’t have to,” he says with that typical, tight-lipped, polite smile.
You shrug. “After a sudden trip like that, I figured you two could use a taste of home.”
What?
Your ego is practically screeching at a corner, while your superego is shaking your id back and forth by the neck.
“Not that my strawberry shortcake tastes like home to you and Kiara,” you sputter, like you’re being framed for murder, but instead of blanching, your face brightens with scarlet. “It’s just that you two live here, or near here anyway— and I assumed the 3-day trip wasn’t in the vicinity of Zambales. But if you two went to Baguio, then the strawberry shortcake is just redundant—”
“(Y/N)!” Court cuts you off, laughing. “It’s okay. But to ease your anxiety, no, we didn’t go to Baguio. And once again, thank you.. you’re quite thoughtful. Which makes you sweeter than your strawberry shortcake.”
Whatdidhesay?!
You look away from Court’s calm face, coughing noisily, and you try not to pound your throat with a fist to knock your heart down back to where it should be.
But what you don’t know is that Court’s ego is digging his grave, while his superego is aiming a nuclear missile at his id, who’s tied up to the wall.
“T-The cup carrier and takeout containers are reusable. You can put your names on them if you wanna use them for future takeouts,” you say once you have the courage to turn back to him.
“That’s neat.” he glances down at the cup carrier.
“Yeah.. but we do advise to leave the takeout containers in Joy-infested waters for 5 hours. Or any dishwashing liquids or soaps. We can clean it again, too, on your next takeout.”
“Duly noted with much appreciation,” Court nods, like a cowboy tipping his hat.
You scratch behind your ear. “The food will be warm for up to 20 minutes. But if you’re going to have it for later, I suggest you leave it out open until it’s not even lukewarm before you refrigerate it.”
“Yeah, alright,” he glances at the SUV. “I’ll do that if Kiara isn’t hungry when we get home.”
“Okay.. oh! And I’m sorry for not telling you about the walkie-talkie.”
“It’s fine.”
“If you want it back, I have it here in my—”
“Just give it back next week. Maybe then, you can stop entertaining my daughter.”
You flinch at the chilling blast from his tone. It was rather abrupt, freezing you like Frozone’s swift, icy assaults. You manage to recover soon, the volcano of your short-temper bubbling, but you put a lid on it.
“Okay.. safe driving. Buh-bye.”
“Bye..”
You stride away, quite rigidly. And as you try to relax, Claire’s face when interacting with you swims up your eyes. The moments you have with her are genuine and precious, whether face-to-face or through radio waves, the budding relationship between you two is certainly not for either of your amusement.
That’s why putting a lid on a volcano is inadvisable. Because the magma will find its way to another opening , or even create numerous exhausts.
You find yourself staring at your reflection on the black-tinted windows of their SUV. The glass lowers, along with your mortified reflection, and you frown at Court with determination.
“What is it?” he asks, still looking straight ahead.
You quietly breathe in and out. “You may not know me well, Kurt, but I don’t make promises that I don’t want to keep.”
He looks at you now. “Shouldn’t it be ‘can’t keep’?” he quips with a scornful smirk.
“Well, if I say that and something happens that will inevitably make me not keep my promise.. then I would’ve dishonored myself and hurted the person I made a promise to.”
“That’s a first.” he remarks mirthlessly.
“You know what they say, there’s a first time for everything.”
“So, what is it that you really want to say?”
You set your jaw tight. “I want you to know that I do want to exchange gifts with Kiara on Christmas.” you pause for a second, “You don’t have to tell me why you two look like you’re on a secret mission to chase after the Road Runner, only God knows why. But… If either of you find yourselves wanting someone to talk to, or you miss the food in the cafe.. leave me breadcrumbs and—”
“You’ll find us?”
“If you want me to find you.. then, yeah.”
“What makes you think we’re hiding?”
You snort. “You literally just said so.”
Court tightens his jaw, and even in the dim blackness of the car, you see the corner of his mouth twisting down. You realize the stubble adorning his jaw has thickened, he probably hasn’t shaved since last week. You dare a glance at Claire in the reclined passenger seat, she’s all cuddled up with a pillow between her and the door.
The hum of the engine continues to fight against the tension in the air. A battle of vibration and reinforced stillness. You keep the anxiety in your teeth as you patiently wait for Court to speak. He's glaring at the windshield, probably imagining it's you, and briefly clenches the wheel before he expels out a sigh.
As if on cue, a cold gust drifts past you, making the bottom of your apron flap lightly. You’re glad that you have your hair in a dutch-braid, only a few short strands wave into your face as Court turns to look straight at you.
“I’m telling you this for your own good, (Y/N).” says Court, eyes as cold as its color and somehow colder than the sea breeze. “We’re not chasing after the Road Runner… Kiara and I are the Road Runner. So don’t go making promises you can’t keep.”
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A/N: gosh, see that tension? it's so visible it slaps!
To proceed to Chapter 7, wait for the click this to enter the portal to open
✨TAGLIST✨
@kat-thepoet @queenofhellhasrisen
#the gray man#sierra six#courtland gentry#court gentry#the gray man fanfiction#reader insert#claire fitzroy#the gray man x reader#sierra six x reader#court gentry x reader#netflix#russo brothers#ryan gosling#ana de armas#chris evans#slow burn#trust issues#teenage girl needs a mama figure#filipino#subic bay
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Pirates and Princesses (8/8)
(gif: @beccs) (PART SEVEN) (SERIES MASTERLIST)
Summary: JJ must confront his childhood trauma when returning home for the first time since his dad went to jail and prevent it from sabotaging his new relationship. Meanwhile, something sinister happens at the Chateau that brings Y/N face to face with her grief over John B’s death.
Word Count: 13.4k
Warnings: Angst, implied sexual content, strong language, parent/child abuse, mental illness, post-traumatic stress disorder, grief, and fluff.
A/N: Welcome to the final chapter of Tokens! This one has a little bit of everything in it, but it also has detailed scenes about JJ and his dad, so proceed with caution if you’re easily triggered by that topic. The love you guys show this fic warms my heart so much, so thanks to anyone who stuck with this story until this chapter. Hope you enjoy it!
Now that she has been sentenced to both punishments, one as a consequence of the fight with Kacey and the other as a consequence of the stunt she pulled with JJ to break out of ISS, Y/N can confidently say that out of school suspension is superior to in-school suspension by a long shot. Instead of sitting in a humid room with Alec for the duration of multiple school days, she's allowed to stay home, go out surfing, and do whatever she wants in lieu of doing classwork.
She promised herself not to make it a habit, promising the invisible presence of John B that she likes to pretend follows her around that she will never get herself into trouble again, but she sees no problem in enjoying her suspension while it lasts.
For the first few days of her suspension, JJ skipped school to spend it with her. Their memories of the conversation they had at three in the morning on Sunday were fuzzy, but not missing entirely. She noticed a difference in his behavior for the first few hours after they woke up under the tree together for the second time in one week. It wasn't a difference in their relationship or how he treated her, it was a difference in him.
He was quieter than usual as they cleaned up cans of beer and tossed them into the recycling, sending pictures to Kie while she was in class after she made them promise not to throw them in the trash. Rather than cracking jokes or making casual conversation with her, JJ made his way around the yard with the recycling bin in his hands and his head in the clouds. It disappeared as the day progressed, but for a little while, he wasn't completely there.
Today, he went into school instead of ditching to spend extra time with her in between shifts at work and time spent with their friends. Since they can't exceed three consecutive absences without a doctor’s note and he doesn't own a printer or laptop to forage the header from a doctor's office, he had no choice but to part from her this morning.
He bites his lip to contain his smug facial expression at the recollection of her wake up call for him. The hand holding his locker door open for him to lean on in the midst of his not-so-wholesome thoughts of her squeezes the metal hard enough to turn his knuckles white.
The curtains weren't shut all the way when they fell asleep before midnight last night, allowing a shaft of sunlight to shine in and land on his face. But that wasn't what woke him up from the dream he was having. In fact, the reality he opened his eyes to was a hell of a lot better than any dream he remembered.
Most of his memory of those moments spent suspended between consciousness and unconsciousness consisted of feeling her pressing a kiss to his shoulder, then her hands rubbing up and down his waist to slip lower and lower until they settled on the waistband of his underwear. It was then that he woke to find her looking up at him for permission from where she peppered kisses along his chest.
Their eyes met right as she kissed the edge of his nipple with this pleading, needy look that he took pride in causing without actively attempting to. She woke up on the brink of coming undone from a pleasant—to put it tamely—dream about him. With a glimpse at the time displayed on the alarm clock, it didn't take much for her to roll over to wake him up.
It ended with her beneath the sheet, finishing what she started Friday afternoon until he was clutching the pillow beneath his head in the midst of his orgasm. It happened so fast, a fault of how hot he found it to wake up to her wanting him so badly, but it felt slower than it truly was in the early morning haze of exhaustion they felt.
The memory as he relives it is as heady as it felt the first time around. He sees it in fractions; her eyes looking up at his, warm palms finding the familiar planes of his muscular body with the exploratory touch of someone who's never traveled it before, and the intense sensations he felt at the end...It's easy for him to stand here and lose himself in it. Despite the class he has to go to, he bargains with himself for one more second spent in the paradise of his memories before he has to come back to reality.
Reality, as his shitty luck would have it, comes in the form of a familiar feminine voice chirping from behind his back as he replays his morning bliss.
"It's good to see you're alive and well, Maybank."
He decides, based on who he knows he'll see when he turns around, that he might invest in a sharpie to write "Bang head here" on the inside of his locker door for instances like these where he'd rather suffer brain damage than speak to someone he can't stomach the presence of.
When he turns to see Kacey with one arm still stretched to hold his locker open, he doesn't bother concealing the genuine reaction from his face for the sake of her feelings. Any care he had for her and her feelings was thrown to the wind as soon as she decided she could steal from and put her hands on his girl last week. However, after a second of thought, a condescending smirk finds its way to his face.
He says, jerking his chin to vaguely gesture at her bruised up face, "Purple really suits your complexion. It makes your eyes pop, don't you think?"
Though the swelling of her black eye has deflated in the days since the fight that’ll soon tally up to a week, the verbal jab hits right where it intended to if the light leaving her eyes tells him anything. She bounces back after a second, though, ever the relentless pest they've come to see her as.
She offers a sickeningly sweet, yet fake smile to mirror the one gracing his striking features and spins so her back meets the locker beside his, allowing herself to invade his space further.
A collection of Y/N's stickers decorates the inside of his locker door that he briefly entertained the idea of designating as a place to bang his head against. They range from girly, glittery ones to those he willingly picked when she gave him the choice. Whenever they're at his locker together, she sticks one on the inside, and the evidence of the habit catches Kacey's wandering eyes.
Her fingertips brush against the surface of the sticker-covered metal while she ignores his protest of, "Can you not touch my stuff?" to inspect them. Since one of the Pogues in particular is famous for her endless supply of stickers, her expression sours at the thought of the girl responsible for them.
She spares him a quick glance out of the corner of her eye as she continues to analyze the sticker collection against his instructions not to, asking, "Why weren't you at the bonfire?" A failed attempt at a seductive look in his direction makes him fight not to roll his eyes. "After how last year's ended, I thought you wouldn't miss it for the world."
JJ doesn't bother to take a second to think things through before he reaches to slam the door closed with her hand still outstretched inside of it. Watching her pull it away just in time to avoid jamming it in the locker probably pleases him more than it should, but he can't help it. His hand catches on the edge of the door, halting it in place right before it closes where her hand previously rested.
She doesn't look too happy with him when he opens the door with no harm done except for the drop of her stomach when he initially pretended to swing it shut on her bruised knuckles. She didn't get many shots in on Y/N when they fought, but apparently it was enough.
He doesn't bother with the fake niceties she's giving him after the disrespect she showed him, his friends, and, most importantly, his girlfriend. The fact that she thinks she has any right to breathe in his direction, let alone flirt with him, after she stole JB's bandana is criminal. 'Cause not only did she mess with Y/N, she messed with John B on multiple levels, and his loyalty to his best friend hasn't disappeared with death. Kie and Y/N told him everything she said about their departed friend in the locker room last Thursday.
But he's smart enough to know what'll hurt her more, so he doesn't go for the general scolding he imagined giving her in his head. Since he was told everything about the encounter in the locker room, he knows she's still holding their history together near and dear to her heart.
"We stayed home," he says, casual and cool as always, with added emphasis on the first word, "You know how it is, my girl doesn't like parties. Especially not ones with kooks."
Hook, line, and sinker.
She scoffs, "Your girl?"
Looking at her now, he wonders if she was always this stupid, or if this is a new development she's had in the year since he last spent more than a minute or two at a time with her. It’s easier to trick her than it was with Kie and Y/N a few days ago, and those poor girls flew into that trap like moths to a flame.
"That's what I said, isn't it?"
The ire is visible in the way her face tenses up in places, her lips pressing together a little more firmly and her forehead creasing between the brows.
"Doesn't your, um, history bother her?" she asks, and he's gotta give her credit for being a sneaky little shit when given the chance. The girl takes every possible opening she can to strike for a potential weakness. "No offense, but you kinda get around."
He shrugs this time, deciding to drop his casual act and aim straight for the jugular.
"She likes having someone who knows how to fuck her right, actually, but I really appreciate the concern."
Much like Kie's reaction to their matching tattoos in the hot tub the other night, her jaw is unhinged to meet the unswept hallway floor they stand on. It makes him wish Y/N weren't suspended in order for her to see the gobsmacked reaction Kacey has to the harsh dismissal. Though he wouldn't want to incite an extra round of the Kacey vs Y/N WWE showdown by having her watch another girl flirt with him and essentially call him a slut upon rejection, he knows she'd get a kick out of it.
This one's for you, baby, he thinks with a quiet laugh to himself and turns his focus to the sticker collection she so lovingly crafted.
There are plenty of summer themed ones left over from the same pack he gifted her for her birthday with the surfboard sticker she used to tease him, as well as a newer genre of Valentine's Day stickers she started using the closer they grew since first getting together. They're mostly different colored candy hearts with corny phrases ranging from "U SXY THING" to the classic "BE MINE" and one printed with "ANGEL" on it—his favorite by far.
However, others are random ones from her endless stash built up over the years from birthdays and holidays deemed worthy enough by her dad to stop by Dollar Tree for a new pack, so the one he sets his attention on is likely meant for teachers or coaches to give to their students. The opportunity appears too good to be true to him when it clicks, but it isn't.
He peels the sticker off of the locker door, careful not to disturb the ones around it, and leans in closer to her to place it on the front of her tank top.
"Leave us alone or I won't stop her next time," JJ says lowly, past the point of civility, then backs away to slam his locker shut for real this time as his voice raises back to a normal volume, "And keep John B's name out of your mouth, got it?"
All she can do is look down at the sticker placed on her shirt with squinted eyes to try and read it while he walks off in the direction of his next class. It tears away from the fabric with a soft noise, and when she finally reads it, she rolls her eyes.
“Good Try!”
Walking out of school to see the Twinkie parked in the usual spot Y/N takes when she isn't suspended is a delightful treat he didn't know to expect after a rough day in class and his run in with Kacey. His head was hung low on his way to Kie's car to hitch a ride to his house before going home to the Chateau, since he had some things to pick up with his dad out of the picture for the near future, but then he heard her greet them.
JJ's body melts into hers upon contact, and he nearly pushes her up against the closed passenger side door of the van with how hard he hugs her. Though he doesn't want to acknowledge it, his dad has been living in his thoughts more than usual today. Ever since he texted him goodbye, he's been withdrawn inside of his head more and more, and after today's inconveniences, the rising anxiety of his plan to visit home has him two seconds from losing his mind.
Her eyes widen at his zeal, meeting Kie's concerned gaze from over the shoulder she rests her chin on. She stands with her keys swinging around her finger as she watches the couple embrace one another. In an answer to the silent question Y/N asks her in their stare, her lips mouth the words, "His dad," to her.
Deep down, Y/N had a feeling.
It began with his impromptu request to run away with her a few days ago and extended into his uncharacteristically reserved attitude the next morning that receded somewhat, but has yet to fully disappear. There is a part of her that's upset that he hasn't come to her to talk about it, to communicate the way they swore they would, yet she also knows it isn't that simple.
She has to remind herself that she knew what she was getting herself into with him. That's not to say that dating her must be a walk in the park for him, it isn't.
She knows based on the amount of times he had to hold her as she cried, or the time he curtailed her panic attack in this very parking lot, that she hasn't made it easy for him in the aftermath of John B's death. But it's because she knows how it feels that she has such patience with his communication issues.
It's not a conscious choice most times, it's an involuntary blockage preventing the words from being spoken no matter how desperately they long to be. They may have made a promise, but she won't chastise him for succumbing to the same pitfalls as her. It’d be hypocritical.
"Bad day?" she asks.
Her voice is tender with him, prodding gently for a clue as to why he pounced on her on sight. He sinks further into her arms at the sound and lets the sanctity of her touch sway him into submission. Everything about her sets him at ease, if only for a second. Her hand lifts the beat-up red hat from his head to allow the other to brush through his hair.
There's a hum of agreement that she feels vibrating through the center of his chest into hers, and her arms pull tighter around his shoulders in response. This time, when she looks up to see Kie there, she's waving a quick goodbye and setting off toward her car, clearly giving JJ the space he needs.
"We can go to the beach," she says softly, "I have a towel in the back of the van, we can just lay there and talk about it if you want."
The idea of her kind offer to him should add to the comfort he finds in her embrace. It should make him nod and whisper his gratitude to her for being the one person that knows him better than anyone, but it brings him back to the gloomy headspace he was in before seeing her.
It started as a minor distraction when he first arrived at school after carpooling with Kie. It followed him in the quieter moments, only making appearances when he wasn't distracted with more pressing matters. It began as that and built the closer the day came to ending. The sooner his inevitable visit back to his childhood home came, the more he lost himself in his fear, reverting back to a state of helplessness he now occupies with no small amount of shame.
His bottom lip trembles with the urge to cry.
"Can we stop somewhere on the way home first?"
The last place she expected him to drive the Twinkie is here.
As they made their way down each street, taking each turn necessary to bring them closer to the house he seldom let her go to over the course of their lifelong friendship, she felt her heart begin to race. And now, as the van rolls to a stop in the yard in front of his house, she has swallow back the lump in her throat at the sight of it.
She has only been here a few times.
The first time, she was seven years old.
It was a sweltering summer morning in the Outer Banks for her and John B as they set off to retrieve their friend after he missed their plans to meet up at the Chateau for a day of having fun, riding bikes, and playing on the boat. Pirates and Princesses was her favorite game to play with them because JJ would switch roles with her halfway through when she grew tired of being the damsel John B had to rescue from the most cruel and vicious Captain Jesse James Maybank.
The HMS Pogue would rock beneath his feet as he marched across the deck of the boat and took her place as the kidnapped Princess Routledge. He handed off his "sword" to her, a stick he found in the yard, and stood at the edge of the boat with his hands behind his back as though he were a tied up damsel in distress for her to hold captive. The sun setting behind them laid a picturesque backdrop that made the scene all the more vivid to their imaginative young minds.
The boat floated in the afternoon current as John B approached the pair with his best pretend face of worry for the fair Princess Maybank, who had the sharp sword of the pirate queen pressing into his throat with the threat of death should he have tried to escape.
Sometimes, she'd let John B advance on them and tie make believe rope around her wrists and ankles while he and Princess Maybank claimed their victory. Other times, they'd get backed up until the heels of her sneakers hung off the edge of the slippery deck. One move from her brother would have her yell something along the lines of not taking either of them alive, then she'd let her and JJ fall back into the marsh together with gleeful laughs infiltrating the humid air upon their return to the surface.
On the day he didn't show up, none of that happened. She and John B rode their bikes together along sidewalks until they pulled into a driveway marked with the address number he remembered from the other time he sought him out to play before.
Y/N didn't understand what they were hearing when they pushed their kickstands down and called out for their friend, but John B's little face blanched at the sound flooding out of the opened windows of the dilapidated yellow house. It was a combination of banging against the walls, glass shattering, and childlike shouts of frustration and pain. Her big brother placed himself in front of her protectively when the front door opened and smacked against the side of the house, but it wasn't his dad storming out of the house, it was JJ.
His eyes widened at the sight of the siblings standing there, and his heart dropped to his stomach at the realization that they heard it. Maybe not all of it, but based on how the girl peeking out around John B's shoulder looked at him, they heard some.
The van is parked in the exact same place their bikes once were, the exact place she and John B stood years ago when they were first confronted with the harsh reality about their best friend's home life, and he looks like he has fully backpedaled into the state of mind his childhood self inhabited. Even when he turns the key in the ignition and lets the rumbling engine sputter down in silence, he sits in the driver's seat with his lip drawn between his teeth in thought.
Yet as soon as she summons the courage to say something, he takes a deep breath and opens the door without a warning or the typical instruction for her to stay in the car. He doesn't tell her to follow him in, nor does he order her to stay out as he used to when his dad still lived inside. He gives her the choice to make on her own, and, when faced with the opportunity to support him or stay outside like the confused little girl she once was, she chooses the first option.
Her swift steps kick dirt up from the earth onto her ankles as she follows him out of the van to the front steps of the house. She tries not to make her concern for him as evident as it'd be without her intervention on her way up the porch, but it's impossible to erase every sign of it from her face.
It isn't a particularly special or scary house. It's a normal home that'd likely look more inviting if JJ were still living here to mow the lawn and tend to the household upkeep his father saddled him with since he was old enough to be put to work. But she knows better than to trust the street appeal. As he takes her hand to lead them through the threshold of the haunted structure, she is overcome with a sense of creeping trepidation that she can't shake.
"You're sure he isn't here?" she asks.
The entryway is crowded with stacks of mail his father wasn’t bothered to open, as well as empty cardboard boxes that once held cans of beer that are scattered, empty, in various places around the house. Her question is answered by the state of the rooms they breeze past in the direction of his bedroom, but she needed something to say to fill the silence. With them, they usually don’t feel uncomfortable not speaking to each other, but this feels different.
The way he stares out in front of him with his hand squeezing hers hard enough to cut off circulation unnerves her more than the tainted energy of the house itself. He isn't himself. He's a shell of the JJ they know and love, the JJ who is most comfortable tucked away in the safe walls of the Chateau with their friends, not here. If anything, how he is while he's here is the antithesis of his behavior while living with her.
Ever since John B died, he's practically moved in with her. When they're hidden away in her house without the reminders of his home life in sight, he's usually the caretaker of the relationship. It comes naturally to their dynamic, both with him being slightly older and his promise to take care of her, but everything is flipped here. It's an alternate reality for him, or, perhaps, actual reality smacking him in the face after a carefully constructed two months in utopia with her.
They come to a stop in front of his closed bedroom door.
"He's gone," he says, not even sparing a glance at her for reasons she can't decipher, "He texted me a few days ago to say goodbye."
With that, he turns the doorknob and lets the door swing open to reveal the bedroom she only saw one other time.
The second time, she was thirteen years old.
It was a Friday.
Since his dad was supposed to be at work, they stopped at his house on their way home from school exactly like they did today so he could share with their friends what he got from his cousin the night before. Being the good girl she was, she didn't even know what he was showing her when he dug it out of the backpack in the bottom of his closet.
Her brows furrowed at the ziploc bag, more specifically the contents inside of it. She was knelt down on the floor in front of the opened closet door with her shoulder pressed up against his to inspect it. The dried green cluster of a plant didn't look like anything she'd seen before, and she couldn't help but ask him what the hell it was rather than react the way he knew the others would.
"What is it? It looks like dried up moss."
JJ laughed and pulled another bag with rolling papers and a grinder stowed inside.
"It's weed. My cousin Ricky gave me a discount since—"
He halted mid-sentence abruptly enough to startle her, his head turning in the direction of where he heard a trunk pulling up to the front of the house. Her stare was still set on where he was holding the plastic bags in his hands, and she noticed, after he stopped speaking in reaction to his dad coming home, that his hands began trembling. It was so minimal, she almost didn't catch it until she saw the bag wavering under the light coming in from his window.
Before she could open her mouth to say anything more, she felt his hands on her shoulders shoving her into the closet. He followed in closely behind her and crawled in until they were both crammed into the confined space together. With the closet doors shut in front of them, he clamped a hand over her mouth, whispering in her ear for her to be quiet.
She stands with her arms crossed over herself in the center of his room, and though nothing has yet to be said or done to convince her anything is wrong, that's the exact reason why she feels so unnerved by the entire experience of coming here.
He's silent.
The closet doors are wide open as he stuffs the rest of the clothes he had yet to bring to the Chateau into the biggest bag he could find. He rips through his belongings in a fit of melancholy driven anger. His thoughts are swirling with similar memories to the ones she conjures from being here again, but his are tinged with a darkness hers don't have, even with hearing him crying in pain as a child and hiding in the closet with his hand smothering her mouth to evade his dad.
JJ visibly grimaces at the memories he's forced to relive in flashes with every glimpse he gets of the room he spent so much time hiding in. It used to be more tolerable to be here, or at least easier to suffer through. At least he was used to it before, but he got so accustomed to life somewhere else that the second he was confronted with coming back, he started to fall apart.
Whatever he can't live without, he finds space for it in the bag and prepares to leave the rest behind. But every object he touches and step he takes around the room brings him back to the person who he spent his adolescence simultaneously fleeing and wanting more from. More notably, it brings him back to the train of thought that has been nagging him ever since he texted him over the weekend.
The third and final time she came here was over the summer.
It happened right before Hurricane Agatha waged war on the island, when none of the Pogues heard from JJ for two days after he said he had to go home to help his dad with something. She didn't want to track him down to his house after they went over twenty-four hours without a single message. She didn't want to have to go back to the house that gave her chills to think about, let alone go to again after they hid in his closet when they were younger, but he gave her no other choice.
What was she supposed to do except go check on him where he last said he'd be? After all, if she lived in the hazardous environment he did, he'd do the exact same for her. If their friends were involved in her thoughts at the time, they would've gone out on a limb to say he would've gone beyond what she did to protect her if the situation were flipped. If he knew someone was hurting her, he would've come in swinging first and asked questions later, but, in her defense, he strictly told her to never come back to his house. By walking over in the first place, she was breaking one of the fundamental rules of their friendship.
Nevertheless, she found herself crouching around the side of his house to find his bedroom window and check if he was in there. Kie and Pope weren't aware of what was happening with his dad yet, but she and John B accidentally found out years ago, so she wasn't wondering why he wasn't answering them, she was wondering if he was alive.
Part of her truly thought underneath it all that Luke might've killed him. He might've been too drunk or high and went too far when beating him, too far to the point where he didn't want to risk going to jail to take him to the hospital for help. She couldn't live with herself if she didn't check, and if he got pissed at her for showing up against his wishes and didn't want to speak to her ever again, she could live with that.
She knocked on his window in a cadenced beat loud enough for it to heard through the room but not any further. After the first series of knocks, no one came to the window. It ripped her heart to pieces to wonder if she'd see him again as she continued to knock and allowed the sound to increase in volume in hopes that maybe he was asleep, but it didn't bring anyone to the window.
It wasn't until she turned back around to go to the front of the house again that she bumped right into the solid wall of his chest and was pushed back up against the house. The question of what she was doing there was on the tip of his tongue, but she said something that stopped him from asking it.
Her arms were thrown around his shoulders in a desperate bear hug.
"Oh God, JJ, you scared me half to death!" she cried into the front of his shirt, "I thought he killed you!"
He can't help but think of it as he packs his belongings away for a final time to bid his hellish childhood home goodbye: What kind of life are they going to have together if they can't get off this island? Running away may have been an idealistic drunken fantasy for him to entertain after his conversation with Pope got him to admit his true feelings for her, but they both know his consistency can't be trusted.
One moment, he's planning to tell her. The next, a day like today comes along, sweeps his legs out from beneath his body, and he's questioning whether it's worth it to force her to put up with his fickle commitment to her. It isn't fair to her, is it?
Right now is just about when he'd normally start to hyperventilate with an oncoming wave of panic, and he does, but he can't let it fully sweep into him with her here. He fights the urge to smack his head with the heel of his palm, as if that'd forcibly remove the poisonous thoughts infiltrating his mind and ruining the careful work they've done together to remedy their issues with communicating their feelings.
Just like you ruin everything, a thought whispers in the corner of his mind. What made you think this would be any different?
His actions around the room have turned somewhat aimless and distracted, which she notices as soon as he starts to disintegrate into a mess of heavy breaths and self-sabotaging thoughts. She picks up on the shift in his energy as soon as the anxiety starts to wash over him, and she'll be damned if she continues to stand here quietly to let it happen.
It's one thing if he's being silent because being here upsets him, or if he simply doesn't know what to say, but she refuses to let him tailspin into a mental breakdown without doing something to stop it. Whether he knows it or not, after what they went through with him trying to push her away last week, she knows what's occurring within his mind right now.
He flinches at the feeling of her hand grabbing his shoulder to turn him to face her at first, and when she reaches again with her other hand to try to hold his hand as he cries, he shrugs off her touch.
"JJ..." she lets the solemn sound of her own voice murmuring his name trail off, "it's just me."
His head shakes at her consoling words. Everything else inside of his mind is so earth-shatteringly loud, he can't drown it out with logic or reason to bring himself away from the memories of his dad. Those intrusive thoughts keep attacking him with doubled, then tripled force the harder he tries to resist them, and he's so exhausted from it. All of it—the memories, his dad going to jail, and his inability to accept her love to its fullest extent without convincing himself she'll abandon him—is exhausting.
This time, when she rests her hand on his shoulder, he swats it away as the frustration of today crushing him with the force of an avalanche. Not to hurt or scare her, but to get her hands off of him before he bursts out of his skin with the sickness it stirs in his stomach. So detached from himself, he anticipates pain from every touch she gives him, and he knows it hurts her.
JJ hardly recognizes his own voice as he backs away from her a step and says, "Don't."
He can tell it hurts her based on how she looks at him immediately after, but he can't handle being touched right now. How did this happen so quickly? It was overwhelming when they first parked outside, but as soon as he stepped foot inside, it was as if a switch was flipped inside of him and all of the buried feelings he kept hidden over the past two weeks exploded into this.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to—"
"You need to leave. I just-I can't breathe and"—He still refuses to look up from the ground or see her face as he paces around the room with no real intent in mind—"You can't see me like this."
That is what breaks her out of her soft spoken, timid attitude to handle the situation the way it needs to be handled. Their natural dynamic worked best for him to take charge when she had her panic attack because JJ acts first and thinks later. He saw that she was in distress and jumped in to help her before things got worse rather than allowing her to keep him at an arms length where he couldn't do anything about it.
Taking a page from his rule book, she takes action.
The room surrounding them is in a state of disarray from him searching through it for the items of clothing and objects now stashed in his duffel bag. There are multiple obstacles in her way as she steps between them like navigating a minefield to reach him after he backed away in instinctual fear, but they don't stop her from reaching him. Nothing could.
Y/N walks right up to him and reaches to grasp his face between her hands, forcing him to stop pacing around and actually look at her for the first time since they arrived her so he hears what she says. To say the least, the way he looks right now is enough to make her cry. There are tears welled up to the brims of his blue eyes, his lips are downturned with his sobs, and he's staring at her like she's about to strike him.
She says it as slowly and clearly as she needs to get it through his head, "He's not here," and before he manages to squeeze out another word of doubt between his rapid inhalations, she cuts in, "Take deep breaths."
He isn't listening to her.
The movement of his chest that hits hers from how close they stand to each other has yet to settle into the familiar pace she remembers from nights of falling asleep with the rhythm of his breaths beneath her head.
Her eyes search his face frantically, from left to right and top to bottom, for any sign of the person she's known for years, but she doesn't see him. Instead, she sees the same panicked child her and John B saw the first time they visited this house. It's uncanny how similar the expression in his face is. It feels to her as if she's been hurled back in time to the moment itself, and when she tries to think about what would've worked with him back then, she doesn't know what else to do except help him escape.
So, with the helplessness of having to watch him turn into a sobbing, incoherent mess, she decides to step into the darkness with him and do what seven year old Y/N would've done. Just like their games of make believe, of pirates and princesses, she assumes the role John B would have and rescues him from what holds him captive. It’s his own mind in this case, but, in the physical sense, it's the house.
She drops her hands from his face and takes his hand in hers to drag him out of the room. The packed bag sits on the floor in their wake as she pulls him back through the bedroom door and into the living room, not caring about what they came here to do.
It doesn't matter anymore.
The various rooms of his dad's house pass by them in a blur as she leads him down the hallway to the front door with one sole objective in mind: get him out of here. If he wants his stuff to bring back to the Chateau, she'll go back inside and get whatever he needs her to, but she isn't letting him inside of this house again. Not under her watch.
Thankfully, since he is undeniably stronger than her and she wouldn't have stood a chance, he doesn't fight it. He stumbles after her guiding hand the same way he always has, just like how he followed her back to the Chateau after she and John B saw him that day when they were kids. She led the way as he sat on the handlebars of her brother's bike, and he watched her hair flutter in the wind with the momentum of their bicycle spokes until the tears dried up.
He watches her drag him out of the home until they've reached the safety of the yard at the bottom of the porch steps, and as soon as the soles of her shoes meet the dirt, she feels his hand slipping out of hers.
"JJ?"
She turns around to see him clutching his chest, rubbing his hand along the front of his shirt over his heart as though it'll loosen up the tightened muscles preventing him from catching his breath. His body weight is leaned onto the railing of the porch steps for support. He's partially slumped on it, looking at her desperately, like she somehow knows the answer to every question screamed inside of his head, and she has never felt as useless.
"You're gonna leave," JJ says through the gasps and cries that leave his cheeks stained with tears.
When she reaches out again to help him remain upright without leaning over the railing, he doesn't shove her hands away as he did inside of his bedroom. It's a small battle won, but she takes it as a win nonetheless.
"What are you saying? I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere—"
"You're gonna leave! Everybody does! My mom, John B, my dad, and you"—his head falls to look at the ground instead of her, and she watches him work through it in his head—"I mean, look at me. You don't want this."
"Don't tell me what I want," she says.
Her voice remains as steady and calm as she can force it to be amidst the turbulent situation, but the way he said it...It takes her right back to sitting in the back of the Twinkie with him at the Cherry Bowl, except it's ten times worse. That felt like a break up, but based on what he's saying, this is one. She hasn't prepared herself for the heartache she feels in response to it.
"You don't want me, you just think you do 'cause I was there after John B died, but you don't. You're gonna go off, find some perfect guy that isn't as fucked up as me, and have a great life somewhere else, but it ain't here," JJ says, his breathing evening out with the distraction of the argument to keep him tethered tor reality, "And it won't be with me."
He can see it every time he's looked at her and debated saying those three titular words that have been floating around in his head since he first met her.
How could she want someone who can't walk into his childhood bedroom without breaking down, or someone who still has years-old scars from cigarette burns on his skin when she touches him? Her bright future contrasted with his pre-designated fate on the Cut, her personality better matched with someone more similar to her, her life continuing on whether he's there or not—it's his worst nightmare, but he's prepared to see it through.
What he doesn't expect is for her to hold her ground.
"You honestly think I'm buying into that bullshit?" she asks.
"What?"
She doesn't put it softly, she states facts with as much harshness as his cruel fantasy had, "You're trying to push me away and I won't let you."
Her typically sweet, soft features have hardened into a bitter expression he's sure he mirrors. The arms holding his waist to keep him upright move to climb up his chest and cup his face between her hands with all of the gentleness her face and voice don't have right now.
She sees right through him.
When he tries to look away again, to avert his eyes to make what he's trying to do easier on himself by not having to look at her when he does it, her grasp on his face holds firm. Her hands guide his chin back up so they're face to face, and he realizes what a mistake everyone makes in assuming her this dainty, broken girl whose only source of strength came from the brother she lost. She's a forest fire.
"You're not hearing what I'm saying—"
Y/N interjects, "I am hearing what you're saying, I'm just saying it's bullshit."
She refuses to let him off the hook, and though it frustrates him on the surface, deep down, it makes him fall in love with her all over again. Her insistence against his speech about her leaving him proves him wrong more than anything else could, 'cause he gave her the perfect chance to dip and she shot it down instantly.
The house looms behind them as a menacing presence that threatens to take control of him again, but she doesn't let it. She keeps his eyes on her no matter how many times he tries to look away and doesn't let anything get in the way of what she says next.
"You think that if you push me away and get me to leave you right now, it'll hurt less than it would if I did it later, and I don't accept that. I won't take the bait and let you torture yourself anymore, okay? I can't speak for anyone else, but I know I'll never leave you. Not willingly, anyway."
She looks into his eyes, and this time its softer, more loving, and he's never felt as understood as he does when she continues to speak.
"I'm in love with you. Whether it scares you or not, it's the truth, and I'll never stop saying it. If you think that your issues with your dad are gonna change that for me, you've officially lost your mind." Their noses brush as she leans in to ghost a kiss over his mouth and pulls away a second later to whisper, her forehead pressed to his, "I love you, JJ. Stop being so stubborn and just let me."
His next breath in trembles as he lets her words sink in, and he's stuck at a crossroads inside of himself without a clue of what to do.
The breeze blows her hair away from her face, the afternoon sunshine painting her golden, and when he sees her hair flutter in the air like it did so many years ago, he can't help but feel as calm as he did during their bike ride home. The further away he got from his dad and the house where it all happened, the calmer he grew, and it hits him at this moment that he's so taken aback by her confession to him, he forgot why he was so upset.
It's sobering. The intoxication of his panic hurtled him back in time to the frightened, childlike state of mind his dad's violent abuse often sent him to, but it was hearing her say those words he's feared for weeks that brought him back. Like the jolt of a defibrillator, he's roused back to life with more clarity than before.
She loves him, but, perhaps more importantly, she said she'd never leave him, and that is what he needed to hear more than anything. That is the statement worth more to him than the four letter word he has agonized over endlessly. No one else every attached the promise of "I love you" with the stipulation of it lasting forever. They said the empty words and contradicted it with their actions, but she hasn't done that. Her actions spoke the words long before her mouth did.
He sighs.
It's a deep, yearning sigh that sends him melting into her with the acceptance of what he's denied for too long. He savors the hands cradling his head, as well as the body pressed up against his that he has memorized down to every beauty mark and imperfection, and makes the right choice.
It isn't like it was the night at the Cherry Bowl, or the night he spoke to Pope about it. It still takes more bravery than he possesses to form the words, but there isn't a physical incapability stopping him anymore. It's just him against the trauma beckoning him into its trap again, and he won't let it lure him back into that house.
"Alright," JJ says to her through a sniffle in acceptance to her command, as if he were agreeing on afternoon surfing plans rather than something as monumental as allowing someone to love him, then continues onto with a timid tone, "I love you too."
Before he can watch for her reaction, she's surging forward through the few inches of space left between them to connect their lips in a kiss.
It's vastly different to the kiss they shared in the hallway at school last Friday. In contrast to that one, the reigning emotion within him that drives the kiss after the hesitant beginning doesn't lead them into increased intensity, it gets gentler. It doesn't explode into chaos and passion, it's a tired kiss that he never wants to retreat from. It's the physical manifestation of his feelings for her underneath the guarded exterior he uses to protect himself: gentle and yielding, yet undeniably powerful.
He feels her smiling through her tears against his mouth. In the face of everything that happened this afternoon, he doesn't feel like he should be smiling back at her, but he does. He smiles while kissing her with tears streaming down his face, still reeling from his traumatic response to coming home for the final time, and wonders how a person can feel such contradicting emotions all at once.
Y/N is the one who starts to pull away first, though it's only to check in on him. If she had it her way, she could stay here with him until the sun sets, but he did just come back from the brink of a full-blown panic attack, so she can't in good conscience ignore his well-being for the momentary bliss of their love confessions.
Her thumb brushes over his bottom lip, her smile drooping with worry as she asks, "Wanna spend the rest of the day on the boat? You always say being on the water makes you feel better. Maybe it'll make it easier to talk about it."
His Adam's apple bobs with how he swallows the lump in his throat.
"Can we maybe take baby steps for now? I don't think I can handle telling you all that shit yet."
It was already enough to allow her to follow him into the house, watch him break down into a fit of panic no one else has seen him in, and tell her he loved her, but it'd cross the line into uncharted territory to talk about everything between him and his dad so openly. Between the minor annoyance of dealing with Kacey to this hellish visit home, he thinks he's reached his quota on feeling uncomfortable today.
She nods in agreement.
"Baby steps."
Drawn back to each other by a force stronger than gravity, they collide again, but it isn't a kiss this time. It's a hug charged with all of the previously unspoken emotions they've buried inside of themselves for years, the same hug she gave him the last time she came to this house with the fear of his potential death lingering in her thoughts.
She throws herself at him with the same desperation she did that day and relishes the feeling of his muscular arms returning the embrace until their bodies are tangled together. She'd usually never refer to something as inherently affectionate as an embrace as violent, but it's the closest she can come to capturing how it feels as their bodies meet. It makes her lose her footing on the bottom step they stand on together, teetering on the edge she'd surely slip off of with the force if not for him keeping her steady.
He's about to say something, a thank you to her for calling him out on his bullshit and not letting him go that easily, when the grating sound of her ringtone blares from the back pocket of her denim shorts.
The contact popping up on the screen along with a series of frantic messages when she pulls away from him to answer shows Pope's name.
Pope You and JJ need to get back to the Chateau ASAP!!
The van doors slam shut behind Y/N and JJ as soon as it rolls to a stop in front of the Chateau.
Under the assumption that something dire happened, as in injury or death or catastrophic damage to the house itself, they bolted off of that porch faster than they knew they could move. She only turned back when she remembered the packed back of JJ's things they abandoned on his bedroom floor and, not wanting him to reenter the house, she brought it back to the Twinkie in record time.
They're preparing to trample up the porch into the house like a stampede of animals when they hear Kie calling them over to the backyard and change direction.
"No one's hurt!" she shouts, knowing that was likely where their minds went after everything they went through during the summer, "You have to see this though, I don't know who did it!"
Sticks and fallen leaves crunch beneath her feet on her way around the side of the house. Her mind races with the possibility of what could've happened that didn't hurt their friends but necessitated a series of texts and calls as frantic as the ones she received at JJ's house. She drove over here in defiance of the speed limit, something she rarely does, and prayed nothing terrible was happening.
It gave her flashbacks to when she found out John B and Sarah died in the storm. The pedal beneath her foot brought the van to an uncomfortably swift speed, then she remembered the sound of Shoupe's voice when he gave them the news. JJ warned her to slow down, then she remembered how it took multiple people to help her restrain him from attacking the new sheriff for letting his men drive their friends into their deaths.
At first, she doesn't realize what's wrong.
Kiara and Pope are standing and waiting for them across the grass near the large tree that sits as a centerpiece to their yard. Based on the body language screaming their frustration and the tears in their eyes, she can tell something bad did happen, but it's not clear what it is until she looks past them to the tree. More specifically, until she looks at what's on the tree.
"Oh my god," she whispers to herself.
Her hand is already up to cover her mouth and conceal the instantaneous frown besmirching her previously relaxed face. They both are stopped in their tracks halfway to where their friends are standing, and she can’t hear JJ's reaction over the rising volume of her hysterical thoughts.
Spray painted in red on top of their memorial for John B are the words "COP KILLER" in bold letters that conceal what they burned into the tree trunk for his gravestone. It sticks out from the beauty of the greens, browns, blues, and swathes of other earthy tones composing the scenery around the Chateau like a thorn amongst flowers, so much so that she wonders how she didn't instantly see it when they rounded the corner to come back here.
Yet that isn't the only thing amiss in the peaceful sanctuary they call home, there are random things strewn around the ground around the tree. An old t-shirt spray painted with the word "murderer" on the front, four ripped up envelopes, and a gorgeous mahogany jewelry box...broken on the grass.
The freshly turned dirt they had the contents of the box buried beneath is scattered around the trashed area as well. It clicks with her a few seconds late that whoever came here to do this must have seen the pinwheel she put in the ground to mark the "grave" and dug it up to add insult to injury.
She moves forward without consciously realizing it and stumbles until she reaches the first object of the debris field. Before this, she was doing a masterful job of holding in her cries, but as soon as she crouches down to pick up the pieces of the jewelry box, the lid snapped clean off the hinges to separate it from the bottom section, it comes rushing out of her against her will. The first unrestrained keen is the first thing to snap JJ out of his shell shocked trance.
He walks after her as fast as his legs will take him without breaking into a run, but she isn't letting him get close before she puts the box back down and shuffles forward to collect the torn letter remains. She doesn't want them to get blown away by the wind anymore than they already might have been, so she scrambles to gather the pieces until they're cupped in her hands to protect them.
"Why?" she asks and looks up at Kie and Pope with tears dripping down her face, "Why would anyone do this? Who would do this?"
Pope says, "My guess is as good as yours. We didn't see anyone leaving when we got here, so it must've happened before school ended. This is all we saw before we called you guys."
For a second or two, JJ is grasping at straws for why this happened and who did it like the rest of them are, but then something Pope said makes it click into place. It sets off a domino effect in his mind as he brings back the memory of a certain offspring of satan being absent from gym this afternoon despite being at school earlier, since his encounter with her before Physics made him, unfortunately, aware of her existence again.
His face is set in anger, jaw clenching with the tension of him grinding his teeth together, and he takes his hat off to fidget with it between his hands for a second. Their friends are too focused on her crying to see him contemplating it, but as soon as he speaks, they look up to see him setting his hat back onto his head in preparation to leave and track Kacey down.
Y/N's head snaps up from the torn letters in her hands to the sight of him storming off across the yard with his only goodbye being the words, "I'm gonna kill that bitch."
Her and Pope stare after him in shock, unable to put the pieces together about who that "bitch" is, but Kie doesn't miss a single beat. While Y/N is crumpled over on the ground in tears, she's rushing after JJ before he can approach the bike parked in front of the house. He doesn't even make it five steps before he feels her hands latching onto his wrist to stop him.
She asks, "Who the hell are you talking about? And why would they do this?"
His eyes narrow at her. His unreleased frustration for the situation in general and having to watch Y/N cry after an emotional afternoon together comes rushing out when he snaps at her.
"Kacey. She talked shit at school and I put her in her place. Now, if you don't mind, I'm gonna pay her a little visit."
He yanks his arm sharply towards himself to free it from her grip, but she's a step ahead of him. Quicker than he can think to stop her, Kie swipes the keys hanging out of his back pocket away and throws them to Pope, who, bless his heart, can't catch to save his life. The key ring jingles with its contact at the dead center of his chest, and she mouths an apology to him before turning back to face JJ.
"What the fuck, Kie?"
He makes to stomp past her and retrieve the keys from Pope only to be stopped by her hands reaching out to grab his shoulders.
"Listen to me, you can't go anywhere. Look at her," she whispers lowly enough to keep Y/N from hearing, pointing behind her to where she sits on the ground with Pope knelt beside her, "I wouldn't put it past Kacey to pull a stunt like this. I'm just as mad as you, but revenge can wait and you know it. She needs you."
The fury visible in his expression is subdued by looking past Kie's shoulder to see Y/N crying softly to Pope about the vandalized memorial.
The last time he saw her so distraught over something, it was the day they made the memorial and buried the box in the first place. She sits on her knees with her mom's broken jewelry box between them, shuddering with the sobs she has no control over, and pours the torn paper into the empty bottom half of the box. Exhausted to the core, she looks more like a sullen, kicked puppy than she does herself.
It makes his anger-fueled instincts that urge him to hunt Kacey down and do something, anything he can to make her feel the pain they do right now bubble down into sorrow. It's visible in his eyes when he looks at her.
Kie knows she's gotten under his skin when he sighs, sparing a parting glance to the bike in the driveway, and nods once at her before setting off back to where they're sitting in the grass.
Meanwhile, Y/N is stuck staring down at the disarray of her backyard with nothing but pain aching through her to the bone.
Her brother did wrong things sometimes as a consequence of being human, but never this, never something worthy of having his name dragged through the mud and being branded a murderer after his death. He stole scuba gear from Ward and broke dozens of laws in their hunt for the gold, but he never crossed that line into moral bankruptcy. Rafe did, and it kills JJ to see someone like Kacey do this to his best friend while hanging off of Rafe and his friends like a leech.
The fabric of his worn t-shirt is tarnished by the dried paint clinging to the front of it to the spell the lie written there, and her vision blurs with tears for what feels like the millionth time in the span of an hour. First, it was JJ. Now, it's John B, and she can't help but wonder if the heartache will ever end. It began to feel better over the course of the week, her grief for him slowly beginning to slip from her mind until now. Until the storm clouds converged again to batter her with another wave of it.
Through the deafening volume of her mind racing with thoughts and feelings to process what's happened, she hears Pope shuffling around to stand on his feet. Then, another person sits down in his place and scoots closer until their bodies are touching, and she knows it's him. She doesn't have to wait to hear his voice or look to see his face, she can tell based on the feeling of his touch and the smell of him she's so intimately familiar with, yet couldn't describe it aloud if she tried.
He doesn't smother her. He sits close enough to touch her and doesn't push it any further.
The background of the pale, cloudless sky frames him in the foreground like the subject of a painting—a living, breathing painting that she could study endlessly. The other trees planted in the yard's leaves flutter distantly behind him and try to draw her gaze away, but she keeps her eyes on him.
Maybe that's how it is, she thinks.
Maybe it'll get better and worse in a dance that'll only stop when they're no longer here to agonize over it. Maybe this is what moving on from John B will always be like. It'll feel like they've made strides in the right direction, then something will come along to shatter it to sharp pieces that'll reopen their stitched up wounds. If that's the case, at least the four of them have each other to lean on when it gets worse again.
JJ sits with her and lets her crawl onto his lap, resting her head on his shoulder, until the sun sinks below the horizon.
The gentle bobbing of the HMS Pogue at the surface of the water steadies her amidst her eddying thoughts. It keeps her present to the moment the way the ropes tying the boat to the dock keeps it from floating adrift into the marsh. It's a motion engrained in her from the start of her life until now from countless days spent on the water. Whether it be for fishing, swimming, or playing make believe with her boys all those years ago, it's as much a part of her as her personality or body itself.
JJ was right about one thing: being out on the water makes it easier to think.
He hasn't followed her out since she woke up before sunrise and snuck out of bed to come here. Despite her efforts not to wake him, he woke up when she disentangled her body from his, silently cursing the fact that they always cuddle so closely, and he tried to pull her back to him with a whine of displeasure in his groggy, half-asleep state. Sleep finally found them after hours of staying up together to talk about what Kacey did, unable to relax from the chaos of yesterday, so he wasn't prepared to wake up that soon.
"Go back to sleep, angel," she whispered as she hovered over him, brushing a chaste kiss to his lips that he was too tired to return.
That was the last time she saw him since this morning, and now that the sun has risen to its peak in the sky without her moving an inch from her perch atop the bow of the boat, she's begun to wonder if he's awake yet. It isn't uncommon for them to sleep in for half of the day when there isn't school or work, so it isn't surprising to her that he's just now waking up when she hears the back door to the Chateau opening and closing.
Unbeknownst to her, JJ has been awake the entire morning since she left bed.
They were so attached to each other yesterday night, he didn't have the time to put it together without her seeing and ruining the surprise, but once he heard the door to the porch close to signify her leaving, he kicked the blankets off of himself and got to work. He wasn't originally planning on starting so early, since they stayed up late into the night together, but once he woke up to the feeling of her sneaking out of his arms, he was too awake to fall back asleep.
The sound of his footsteps on the dock warns her of his approach, but she doesn't raise her head from where she rests it in her palms to stare out at the water.
"I was wondering when you'd finally wake up," she says.
There's another few steps, then the boat jostles with his weight stepping onto it.
He doesn't say anything to her in response. The only clue she gets as to what he's doing are the footsteps on the deck that lead closer to her until she feels him sitting down on the bow next to where she is. And she's about to open her mouth to ask if he's okay when he sets something down in front of her.
It's a shoe box.
Y/N turns to see him, eyes flickering over his tired face, and looks back at the box with furrowed brows.
"What is this?"
His hair is messy, exactly how it was when she left him in bed this morning, and if she weren't more focused on the mysterious box he plopped down in front of her, she'd be combing through it with her fingers. He's gotten used to those casual displays of affection from her; how she runs her hands through his hair on mornings before school when he forgets to brush it, or when she fixes a button on his flannel that he missed.
JJ's lips are tipped in a smile, and she can't help but blush with how he looks at her. She never used to see it, but he has always looked at her like this. Like he's hopelessly, utterly in love with her. Even before they lost John B, back when he'd expend all of his romantic and sexual attention on girls he hardly knew, he still looked at her this way.
He gestures at it and says, "Open it."
The lid of the box is coated in a freshly dried layer of blue paint to match the shade of the sky overhead. She knows instantly that he must have dug through the arts and crafts box she specifically labeled with a warning for him and John B to stay out. It's painted with aimlessly sloppy brushstrokes and stickers placed at every corner of the cardboard box, all of which she recognizes from the stash she kept under her bed alongside the India ink he borrowed last Friday.
As she gives him a skeptical look and reaches to lift the lid off of the shoe box, she makes a mental note to rewrite the label on the arts and crafts box without the warning for him to keep out. Since John B isn't here to steal anything from it and JJ never follows that rule anyway, it's redundant at this point.
Any skepticism is washed away from her face as soon as she flips the lid open to reveal what's inside. It leaves her speechless as she looks down at it all.
"JJ..." she murmurs in awe.
Sitting at the bottom of it is a folded up t-shirt she saw JJ wear multiple times, but never again since John B died. He refused to glance at the shirt his best friend gave him the year before they never saw him again, let alone dig it out of the corner of her closet where he keeps his things...until now.
But that's a scratch on the surface of all of the things about his gift that stuns her to silence. The next thing to catch her immediate attention is a picture she hasn't seen in years.
It's one that Big John took of the three of them together right where she and JJ are sitting. She was much younger in it, flashing a toothy grin with her arms thrown over both boys' shoulders. To her left, John B was leaning his head on her shoulder. To her right, JJ was wearing an eyepatch they crafted out of an old black shirt he stole from his dad. It was cut with the kitchen scissors and tied around the back of his head in a knot.
She brushes her thumb over John B's face, then sets the crinkled photograph back down atop the folded shirt and moves her attention to the last surprise.
Letters.
Torn up pieces of paper painstakingly taped back together sit one on top of the other, some missing pieces here or there, and it makes her mouth part in shock. Her hands shuffle the letters apart to see each one and recognize the handwriting: Kie's bubbly, swirling letters, Pope's neat cursive, hers, and JJ's chicken scratch writing that she's able to decipher from years of proofreading his essays.
She pictures him at her desk all morning while she was sitting out here, ripping tape off of the roll and arranging the puzzle pieces of the ripped letters until he was sure he got it right. It made him want to rip the hair from his scalp, but he sat there and pushed through the frustration to make it as perfect as he could for her. The missing pieces were primarily from Kie's letter, which fluttered away on a balmy breeze when Kacey tore it up and threw it to the ground, but the one he wanted her to have the most wasn't missing more than a single piece.
Y/N looks up from the letters held like a precious treasure in her hands to see him watching her with that same classic JJ smile on his face, but he doesn't let her get a word in yet.
"Go on," he says, leaning closer to pull his letter to John B out and place it on top of the pile for her to read, "I want you to read it."
"You didn't let me read it when I asked before though, are you sure you—"
He interrupts her before she can worry herself over it, "Dude, just read it. I promise I'm fine with it. I want you to."
The letters crinkle under her touch as she looks back down and smooths them out on the deck enough to read through the clear tape. With one last confirming glance to him for permission, she takes a deep breath and reads the first line.
Dear John B,
You really know how to keep a guy on his toes, don't you? You really outdid yourself on this one. I was so sure we were gonna make it, but I guess you had to go all Romeo and Juliet on us, huh? As long as you and Sarah are happy macking on each other in heaven, it's okay.
In all seriousness, I fucking miss you, bro. I miss you more than I realized a person could miss another person. Whenever I need to talk to you again, I don't know what to do. I guess that's why it's good that Y/N made me write this.
Also, I'm really sorry for—
"What does it say there? There's a whole chunk missing," she murmurs.
He scoots close enough to her that she can feel his body warmth radiating onto her through the shoulder of his flannel. Sunlight reflects on the silver rings decorating his fingers as he holds one side of the paper to tilt it enough for him to squint at.
"Macking, I think. It's supposed to say "I'm sorry for macking on your sister."
—macking on your sister. You can totally kick my ass for it, but before you come back from the grave to murder me, let me defend myself, okay? She isn't just another girl for me, John B.
I think you knew it before I did.
Last summer, you asked me straight up if we were hooking up behind your back after I kissed her in front of you on the porch. I laughed in your face, but you were right.
You saw everything before me, man. You knew I loved her since we were kids and waited for us to come to you about it, so that's gotta mean something, right? I hope it means you wouldn't be mad at me for this.
I swear I won't fuck it up with her, but you already know that. That's why you asked me to take care of her,. I didn't know why at the time but I do now. I won't let you down.
I'm keeping my promise.
- JJ
P.S. Don't miss me too much. We'll be shotgunning beers together up there before you know it.
There are tears blooming in her eyes when she lifts her gaze from the tattered paper to look at him again, but they aren't sad. For once, the tears slipping down her cheeks are happy tears, not born from grief, sadness, and pain, but bittersweet happiness.
They're caught staring at each other for a second before he asks her shyly, "It isn't too sappy or anything, is it? 'Cause I thought it—"
"C'mere," is the only thing she can get out before she's tugging him forward by the front of his shirt to kiss him.
JJ stumbles a little with the unexpected force of her pulling him to her, but he takes it in stride. He steadies himself and lets his hands shoot out to grapple for purchase on her waist, keeping her pressed up against him tightly as he kisses her back.
And it doesn't get much better than this, does it? This is it for him. He meant what he wrote to John B, he won't fuck it up with her, especially not because of his trauma with his dad getting inside his head and sabotaging his relationship with her. This is what makes everything worth it.
It brings happy tears to his eyes too.
She can taste the salt of them where their lips meet in the middle. It makes her smile, wrapping her arms around his neck and clenching the letters he mended for her in her fist to keep them from blowing away in the wind, and they both start to laugh into each other's mouths at the poignant feeling they both share but can't quite place.
They pull away from each other to catch their breath after another moment of it, and she can't help but stare. How could she not when she feels like this? It’s less like he’s her boyfriend and more like a piece of her soul has attached itself to his with no hope of letting go in the near future.
"You're the best thing that ever happened to me," she whispers to him.
Plain and simple. No room for disagreement or a bashful rejection of the compliment. She's pulled back from him enough to hold his gaze and make sure he sees her seriousness, and there isn't anything he can do to refute her statement.
He brushes his nose against hers affectionately, dipping down to kiss her again, but when he leans back to see her face, he can't help himself.
"Ditto."
The rest of the day after their moment on the boat, locked away in their own little world where none of the monsters chasing them could sneak through and ruin it, melts away peacefully. After another half hour spent looking through the box together, of her thanking him over and over again, he hops off of the HMS Pogue onto the dock and extends his hand to her in the most gentlemanly manner possible.
His lips are curved into a smirk as he kneels down on one knee as though she's a revered royal and bows his head in subservience, "Princess Routledge."
Her hand fits in his warm, calloused palm as a perfect match, and she steps off of the boat onto the dock beside him with an expression to match his.
"Captain Maybank," she says in her most regal royalty voice.
Her stellar performance breaks into a laugh they share as he stands and throws his arm around over her shoulder to walk back to the yard. The cardboard box is tucked beneath one of her arms while the other slips around his side to hold him back, and her heart feels full with both the presence of JJ and John B alongside her.
They bury it together.
Tag List: @gabiatthedisco, @fangirlvoice, @black-syren, @apparrio, @particularcth, @planetdemon, @idk-ijustworkhere, and @krisphann
Also, now that it’s over, let me know what your favorite part was in the comments or tags if you’d like to :) I’m curious.
#jj maybank#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank smut#outer banks#obx#fanfiction#i'm gonna miss these dorks#🥺#I love how he tries to break up with her and she’s like ‘no❤️’#also totally do not put on ‘seven’ by Taylor Swift during the childhood flashbacks unless u wanna cry#cause I did and my sensitive ass was crying#that song is about John B and JJ okay#it just is
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Hi Eve! Just wondering if you could write a coops smut where one of them wears lingerie? You sort of explored the concept in the Valentines Day smut where Sirius wore thigh highs, but i was maybe thinking a fic where one of them wears a full set. Its all completely up to you!
How about both? Happy smutty Monday, folks! Coops credit goes to @lumosinlove
TW for smut, subspace/ subdrop
It was Friday, and Remus was learning the glory of stockings on hockey thighs.
It was Thursday, and he began to wonder how to repay his lovely fiancé.
It was Sunday, two weeks after Valentine’s Day, and between flashes of thunder outside and damn near howls of pleasure into their traumatized pillows, Remus was still thinking about the socks.
It was Tuesday, a bye week, and the last piece of his plan clicked into place as Sirius hefted him further over the countertop by the muscle of his thigh with one hand keeping his chest flush to the cool marble.
It was Wednesday, and Remus smiled to himself as Sirius snuggled closer in the darkness of a quiet night in. He ran an absentminded hand through inky curls, relishing the soft puffs of Sirius’ breath on the hollow of his throat while their legs remained comfortably tangled. You have no idea what’s coming, he thought, letting his lips linger on Sirius’ forehead. No idea at all.
It was Sunday, and Remus had spent two minutes hyping himself up in the bathroom mirror. The rustling from their bedroom had stopped long before. “Alright, you can do this,” he murmured, leaning his hands on the edge of the sink. “You look hot. This isn’t weird. He’s gonna lose his fucking mind.”
“Mon loup?”
Anxiety leaped in Remus’ stomach. “One second!” he called back through the closed door. He stared at himself for a moment longer, then sighed. It was a stupid idea—there was no way Sirius would want to see him in something as silly as this. He looked ridiculous, and it wasn’t even worth it; any clothing would be off in a heartbeat anyway. Sirius always preferred skin-to-skin contact.
The lacy edge of the garter belt itched the peak of his hip as he blew out a slow breath. Did Remus still dream about Sirius’ thigh highs over a month later? Yes. Did that guarantee Sirius would have a similar reaction to seeing him in actual lingerie? Not necessarily.
Remus liked guarantees. They were safe. Soothing. Unquestionable.
“Are you alright?” Sirius’ voice floated through the door on a wave of concern.
Fuck it. The bathroom lights caught the silver buckles. It’s now or never. “You can’t laugh, okay?” he warned, closing a hand around the knob.
“I won’t. I have a surprise for you, too.”
That bit of curiosity gave him that last push of courage he needed to open the door and step out of the safety of the bathroom. His pulse skyrocketed, though whether it was from the sudden feeling of absolute exposure or the sight of Sirius waiting on their bed in some sort of sheer, lacy top, Remus couldn’t tell. Sirius stared at him, lips slightly parted. Remus cleared his throat and spread his hands. “Surprise?”
“Oh.”
“You look—you look great,” he managed lamely. There were a million better words to describe the lavender fabric cascading over the planes of Sirius’ chest, but his brain had been replaced by the blush prickling up his neck and face. Going for the basic black garter belt and underwear suddenly seemed subpar instead of classically sexy.
Sirius shifted on his knees and reached for him. “Viens ici.”
“It—” Remus faltered. His chest and legs were bare, save for the satiny clasps holding the garters in place on his thighs. Sirius was just staring, like he couldn’t believe his eyes. It had been a long time since he felt self-conscious around Sirius; every bit of missed embarrassment flooded back at once as he sat on the foot of the bed. “I liked your socks on Valentine’s Day, and I figured—I dunno. This is the surprise, by the way.”
“C’mere.” Sirius’ eyes finally flickered up to his face without a trace of judgement.
“I’m here.”
“Here,” Sirius repeated, tugging him over to straddle his lap with an arm around Remus’ waist. He kissed him, soft and slow but undeniably wanting, before he leaned back. “You look so handsome, mon coeur.”
“Yeah?”
“Ouais.” And, god, if Remus didn’t love the way his voice curled around that word, turning it into a million perfectly lazy syllables.
He rolled the hem of Sirius’ top between his fingers and hummed against his mouth. “This is new.”
“You like it?”
“Mhmm.” It was hard to tear his eyes away from the shadow of muscle beneath the delicate fabric.
Mischief flickered over Sirius’ face. “It’s called a ‘babydoll’. Thought you might get a kick out of that.”
“Babydoll for my baby,” Remus teased, kissing his nose with a playful tug to the lace edges. Sirius’ gaze slipped back down to his lap—no, his legs—and his fingers toyed with the seam of the accompanying underwear. Remus placed a light kiss to the shell of his ear, watching every twitch of his hands. “What do you want?”
“To look at you.” There was nothing but honesty when Sirius glanced back to him. The intensity of it sent a spark up Remus’ spine; he had grown so used to Sirius’ general aura of focus that he had nearly forgotten what it felt like wholly directed on him.
“And…?”
“And nothing. Just to look.” Nervousness flickered across his fine features as he settled back against the headboard and pulled Remus with him. “Just for a minute, and then we can do whatever you—”
Remus silenced him with a kiss, bracketing his waist with his palms. The babydoll was like water under his touch, but Sirius was as solid as ever. “This is for you,” he said when they separated. “You can look for as long as you like.”
Except Sirius didn’t only want to look—he wanted to touch. That fact was made clear within seconds, when the hands smoothing up and down Remus’ thighs in rhythmic motions began dipping beneath the straps of his garter belt and sliding up to his narrow hips, then hooked around the backs of his bent knees. Sirius pressed one palm flat over his abs and Remus shivered, trailing his lips down his neck. He wasn’t aroused in the lightning-fast please please I need you now kind of way, but more of an I’m about to float into space if you don’t keep touching me like a treasure buzz.
“Re, honey,” Sirius murmured. It was only then that Remus realized most of his breaths were coming in short pants instead of kisses. The nickname was one of his favorites, reserved for the times when he was well and truly gone; it was more tender than mon coeur, and worlds more intimate than his own name or even sweetheart. He nipped the edge of Sirius’ jaw and felt him gasp.
Remus licked his lips as he pulled away just enough to speak. “D’you want me to take it off?”
“Never.”
He smiled. “It has to come off if you want to fuck me.”
“Deux pièces.” The arm around his lower back tightened as one hand came to rest on his ass, which was still fully covered by lace-lined black fabric. Remus had opted for the ‘boyshort’ choice, as it looked to be the most likely to prevent slippage.
That, and it had fewer strappy bits. The buckles were hard enough to figure out—adding an accidental wedgie into the mix seemed like a poor idea.
“Yeah, but the important piece can only come off if I take the fun one off first,” Remus explained, snapping one of the ties. Sirius stared at it for a long moment before blinking slowly.
“Are you sure?”
“Giving me puppy eyes isn’t going to flip this inside out, babes,” Remus laughed. “Two seconds.”
“But you’ll keep the fun part on, right?” Sirius slid down to lay next to him while he wrestled with the garter belt, hissing curses each time the buckles pinched his fingers. It was, quite possibly, the least sexy thing he had ever done. That did not seem to deter his fiancé—if anything, watching Remus struggle with black satin strips in the dark while laying flat on his back appeared to be the highlight of Sirius’ day.
The fog in his head cleared a bit as he worked his underwear down his thighs, being careful not to mess with the garters too much. It had taken him five full minutes to get the damn things on in the first place, and he wasn’t exactly in the mood to waste another five that could be spent in much more pleasurable ways. “The ‘fun part’—” Remus couldn’t spare a hand to do air quotes, but he hoped Sirius got the gist. “—is a lot more trouble than it’s worth.”
“Nope.”
He paused. “You’re not the one losing a fight to a few scraps of fabric.”
Sirius met his eyes, looking every inch the fallen angel with his hair splayed over the pillow and his lavender whatever-the-hell-glory pooling at his mid-chest. “Do you want me to take it off for you?”
“I thought you wanted the fun part to stay on.”
“Here.” Remus barely managed to kick the underwear off his ankles before Sirius shuffled over to lay between his thighs and attach his mouth just beneath the left garter.
“Oh, fuck me,” Remus huffed, letting his head fall back against the pillows.
“Gimme a minute,” Sirius said into his skin while he licked a stripe up to the first buckle and carefully pulled it down to hook into its proper place. Remus arched his back, only to be pushed down a moment later as Sirius electrified patches of skin he didn’t even know he had. Teeth slipped along the curve of his muscle and nibbled just above the back of his knee; Remus clenched his hands in the sheets with a shuddering inhale and tried his best to keep his wits about him.
By the time Sirius moved on to his other thigh, he was a goner. He could practically feel his pulse through his dick and the fog had returned with a vengeance, blurring the world at the edges while he let go of the tension in his back. How could he possibly be stressed when Sirius was saying such pretty things? The warmth of lips on his thighs disappeared and he stretched his arms above his head, relishing in his own contentment and Sirius’ light laugh. “You’re lovely,” he mumbled. Really, it was the only appropriate word for the occasion.
There was a rustling sound next to him, but Remus didn’t bother paying attention to what it was—Sirius’ weight all around him was more than enough to occupy—
“Oh.” His eyes flashed open as a lube-slick finger pushed into him to the first knuckle. “Oh.”
“Were you listening?” Sirius sounded faintly amused. Remus smiled lazily; he must have missed a joke (or a warning) somewhere in the tumble of words from that lovely pout. He rocked his hips onto Sirius’ finger, stretching one leg out as the other remained bent and tilted away. It was only kept in place by Sirius’ free hand, but even the idea of being held sent a tingling feeling all the way to his toes.
“How many?” Remus asked, looping his arms under Sirius’ to pull him closer. He needed warmth, and the smooth familiarity of Sirius’s chest against his own. He needed the encompassing feeling of being covered, which had yet to fade, no matter how much more muscle he gained.
Sirius smiled into the side of his neck. “Two.”
“Really?”
“Mhmm. Are you still with me?”
“Sure.” The world zoomed back into 3D focus when Sirius’ fingers brushed his sweet spot and Remus gripped his shoulder blades with a hitch of breath—his free leg jerked inward at the sudden shift. “There. There, now.”
“I have other plans, sweetheart.”
“Now,” Remus insisted. He would give Sirius anything he wanted if it meant he could feel that thrill again. Their bedroom was dim, but the lights popping at the corners of his vision as Sirius closed a hand around his shaft and continued sliding two fingers into him were so very bright. Remus moved his hands down from Sirius’ shoulders to his hips, then lower to give him a hint. “Now?”
“I was going to do three—”
“Now,” Remus said, brooking no room for argument. He pushed Sirius’ chest until he rolled onto his back—bless the man for his quick thinking skills, because Remus’ new muscle still wasn’t enough to manhandle him properly—and settled himself into his previous position on Sirius’ lap.
A dark eyebrow arched, though his dilated pupils gave away Sirius’ true feelings. “Like this?”
“You said you wanted to look, didn’t you?” Thinking back, Remus couldn’t imagine how he could ever have been worried about this. He took a few deep breaths as he sank down, biting hard on his lip against the dizzy want prodding the edges of his mind. This needed to last. Sirius’ mouth was cherry red and wet when he glanced down, fully seated and feeling rather confident about the whole thing. “Then look.”
The first rock of his hips brought a whimper from plush lips and Remus grinned; he took Sirius’ hands and planted them on his thighs before bracing his own against the broad planes of his chest. Silky fabric parted under his palms and his smile widened into giddiness as he slid his hands beneath it to rest on warm skin. Sirius pushed the side of his face into the pillow with a huff of breath.
“No,” Remus panted as he continued to move, pulling Sirius’ chin back up. His hands were shaking when he cupped his face. “Look. L—look at me.”
Sirius’ brows pitched and his silver gaze flickered down to the garter belt; Remus let his head fall back as long fingers toyed with the straps, sometimes tugging gently, sometimes snapping fireworks through his legs. The power shift between them ebbed and flowed like the tide. He wanted a tsunami.
He worked the words around in his mouth for a moment, unsure of how to ask for what he wanted. One of Sirius’ hands traveled to his back and began moving in steady presses up and down his spine. “Fuck me,” Remus pleaded.
A synchronized roll of their hips made them both moan. “I am,” Sirius said breathlessly.
Remus licked his lips and made a valiant effort to get air back into his lungs. “Please.”
His expression must have made the message clear enough, because understanding rippled across the puzzlement on Sirius’ face in mere moments; with a firm squeeze, Remus’ hips stopped cold. Mistake, his brain thought immediately as Sirius’ dick rested directly on his prostate. Mistake, mistake, keep moving or you’re gonna—
“Remus.”
The whine that tore from his mouth would have been embarrassing if he had any self-conscious braincells left to spare. He bit his lip again, teetering on a knife’s edge while his thighs shook and his knees slid on the sheets.
“Deep breaths.”
One.
“One more for me.”
Two. He was wheezing slightly with the effort of keeping down his moans.
“Try again.”
A frustrated grumble built in his chest, but he obliged. Three. The air was warm and smelled like Sirius; it was intoxicating. His next breath was even deeper, and he let it fill him.
“Good job.”
Something in Remus perked its ears up and he managed a lopsided smile, blinking his eyes open to look down at Sirius. His face was still soft, but his eyes had a tarnished edge to them that sent a shiver down Remus’ spine and nearly undid all his hard work.
“Color?”
He didn’t hesitate. “Green.”
“Are you slipping?”
Slipping, slipped, gone for good, he thought. “Mhmm.”
Sirius laid him back down, catching himself from sliding out at the last second. Remus arched his back at the slow press in. “How do you want it?”
“I already told you twice,” he said, planting a kiss to Sirius’ upper lip. The warm touch around his thighs had not faltered yet. “Come on, Captain, you know what I want.”
Sirius positioned his legs to wrap around his waist and kissed him fully, stealing the breath from Remus’ body in one fell swoop as he began to move his hips again; the pace increased so steadily that Remus nearly lost himself in it. The lace of the garter belt no longer itched, but slid in a blissful rhythm instead. The bits of cold where the small buckles rubbed against his skin were a mind-melting contrast to the cocoon of warmth he sank into.
“M—” Remus didn’t even get the word out before Sirius gave him a hard thrust and pressed their tangled fingers further into the mattress. He muffled a shout into the dip of his shoulder and sucked a mark there between moans. “Oh, fuck, Sirius.”
His head was spinning with the mixture of sensations—he had been so focused on being full that he almost forgot about the hand still moving terribly slow along his shaft. One leg kicked out on its own accord and he twitched, one hip canting upward until Sirius held it back down without breaking stride. Remus’ breaths were little more than staccato moans; he knew bringing out Sirius’ dominant side was an easy switch to flip, but he hadn’t been expecting the change to be quite so sudden. Not that he was complaining, of course.
Sirius let go of his hand to drag his leg back up, fingertips digging in just below the garter as the new angle drew a desperate ‘holy shit’ from Remus and a squeak of protest from their bedsprings. He had forgotten how long it had been since Sirius truly railed his lights out—the tingling sensation racing through his thighs and up to his chest was a welcome companion.
And he began to laugh.
Breathless and practically hiccups, but a laugh all the same. He could see Sirius’ confusion in his mind’s eye despite the fact that he had given up on trying to keep his eyes open several thrusts prior. The movement slowed. “What?” Sirius asked. “What’s so funny?”
“I fucking love you,” Remus said between gasps.
“Why are you laughing?”
“I don’t know.” Something warm slid down his cheek. “It’s so good and I can’t—I don’t know. Keep moving, please, please.”
Sirius’ thumb swiped across his cheekbone and he picked up the pace again; Remus’ shocked laughter faded back into panting and babbling within a few seconds, but the pure elation didn’t slip until he felt his orgasm approaching and resorted to leaving a trail of sloppy kisses along the line of Sirius’ collarbone and neck. Sirius liked his mouth, liked feeling it on him, and Remus could tell that he was getting close by the heat building under his palms where he struggled to find a handhold.
“I l—I lo—I love you,” he managed, adding a love bite to his collection around a groan. They were both sweaty messes, but the salt on his lips was exactly what he wanted.
“I love you, too.” Sirius’ voice was just as labored as his own, buzzing against every pleasure center Remus had.
“I lo—” He broke off with a strangled shout as Sirius squeezed the sensitive part of his thigh at the same time as a thrust. There was nowhere for his mouth to go. He bit down hard on instinct.
Sirius hissed in pain and Remus immediately pulled away, feeling frantic and worried and awful. “Ow.”
“ ‘m sorry,” he said, still a little wild as he covered Sirius’ cheek in apologetic kisses and searched for a hand to hold. “ ‘m sorry, I didn’t mean to, I promise.”
“It’s okay,” Sirius assured him, soothing his hands as they skimmed across his body. “Just surprised me.”
“Didn’t mean to hurt you.” Horror tried to push in around the tangle of joy-want-need-more, but there simply wasn’t room. Remus settled for running his trembling fingers through Sirius’ hair and kissing him gently. He hoped it would be enough.
“You didn’t hurt me,” Sirius said against his lips, rubbing circles with his thumb in the crease of Remus’ hip and thigh. The whirlwind in his head calmed to tv static—the world tunneled to them and their bed. Remus buried his face in Sirius’ neck and slid deep under.
He registered the pressure of Sirius’ hands and the feeling of his own throat pouring out nonsense; he felt his muscles clench and the slide of satin on sweaty skin before balling his fists so tight in Sirius’ babydoll top that it nearly tore. He heard his own breaths become shallow, knew it was Sirius’ hand running along the crown of his dick, and finally, finally shuddered apart with a hitching whine.
“Re, honey.”
Remus sighed through his nose and held him close. He was beyond comfortable, if not a little sticky. Again, his body suggested.
No, his brain answered immediately.
Yes.
No.
Yes.
No.
“I can’t,” Remus slurred.
Lips pressed against the corner of his mouth. “What can’t you do?”
“Go again.”
He felt laughter from the weight above him—Sirius, his brain supplied with a happy fizz down his back—and let his legs be pulled back down to the mattress. “Yeah, not a chance.”
The warmth inside him slipped away and he winced. “Put it back.”
“Nope.”
“Why?”
“Cause we’re definitely done.” The laughter returned, bright as a summer day, and he rubbed his face in the hollow of angular collarbones where the vibration was strongest. “How are you feeling?”
“Noodle.”
“Okay, sweetheart.”
Remus closed his eyes and stifled a yawn; the world could wait until he was done with his nap.
“Hey.” Someone tapped his hip and he frowned. “No falling asleep yet.”
“I’m tired.”
“I know, but we need water and a shower.”
Remus squirmed around until he could fix Sirius with a look. “Can’t stand up.”
“You hate sleeping while you’re sweaty.”
Fair point. Remus became suddenly and harshly aware of how sticky he was and pulled a face, flexing his fingers on Sirius’ back. The high was softening; he felt more settled in himself already. He nudged Sirius until he laid down, then curled into his ribs with an arm and a leg slung over his body. The aftershocks raced in pops of lightning down his legs. “Teddy bear.”
“Hmm?”
“Teddy bear,” he repeated. “ ’s all you are, at the end of the day. I love it. I love you.”
Sirius pulled him closer and kissed his temple. “How are you feeling?”
“Better.” He stretched all four limbs and felt his elbow pop, then relaxed. “Much better. Alright, I need to get this thing off.”
If trying to put the garter belt on had been difficult, it was nothing compared to forcing his unsteady and sweat-slick fingers to get it off. “Do you need some help?” Sirius asked, amused.
“No.”
He struggled for a moment longer, spoiling the sweetness of the drop with frustration, before Sirius’ hands replaced his own and carefully untied each strap so he could get it off properly. “There you go.”
Remus kicked it to the floor and glared balefully at it. “I love you, but I’m never wearing that again.”
“Never?”
“Maybe one more time,” he conceded. The confidence boost had been dizzying. “As long as you keep this.”
Sirius looked down at where Remus’ fingers were tugging with the hem of his slip. “I really like it, too.”
“The color’s nice.”
“C’mere.” Sirius wrapped his other arm around Remus’ shoulders and drew him in for a snuggle, rubbing his back with one hand. “Let me know when I can get us some water, okay?”
“You can go, if you need to.”
“Really?”
He hesitated, then moved his head to rest above Sirius’ heartbeat. “No.”
“D’accord.” Sirius kissed his forehead again.
Remus lasted three minutes before he couldn’t stand the tacky feeling of the lube any longer, but those three minutes were the coziest he could remember. Sirius was warm and traced patterns over his bare skin; his soft lips decorated Remus’ face, simultaneously lulling him and keeping him from falling asleep. With a sigh, he detached his arms. “Okay.”
“I’ll be right back,” Sirius promised. The room was darker without him—the bed stayed warm. Remus scooted over into the indent he left and basked in the memory, cataloguing his aches. Abs? Sore. Arms? Still good. Thighs? A bit chafed from lace, but alright. Neck? Scattered with love bites he couldn’t recall receiving, though that was a fairly common occurrence.
“That was quick,” he mumbled when the other side of the mattress dipped.
Sirius shrugged. The babydoll shift was tragically absent. “The usual two minutes, actually.”
“Must have zoned out,” he hummed, leaning into the cool washcloth on his face. A few tears always slipped out when they dipped into rougher territory, though he never felt sad. It was just…overwhelming, in the best way.
Sirius cleaned his thighs with the same careful touch as his face before handing him a cup of water. “Are you hungry?”
“Nope.” Remus downed the glass in two gulps and opened his arms. “Bedtime.”
“No pajamas?” Sirius asked with a laugh, though he obliged and let Remus laminate himself to his side.
“Unnecessary.”
“No shower?”
His instinctive response was god no, cuddles take precedence and I’m dead on my feet, but a shower did sound nice. Sirius washing his hair, scrubbing the last bits of shakiness and his drop away, going to bed clean…
“Alright,” he agreed grudgingly. “We’re probably going to need to change the sheets, too.”
“That can wait until we’re done.” And before he could even attempt to stand on his own, Sirius gathered him into his arms and hoisted him off the bed. If he wasn’t afraid he’d fall flat on his face without help, Remus would have protested. “Mon dieu, I forgot how muscly you are now.”
“Says the man who can’t stop ogling me whenever I take my shirt off,” Remus teased, then frowned when he saw the purpling bruise on Sirius’ neck. “Holy shit, my dentist could identify me with that thing. Are you sure you’re okay?”
Sirius paused in the bathroom doorway and kissed him hard, stirring the last dregs of arousal in Remus’ gut. “You have blanket permission to do that whenever you like.”
Remus gaped at him, speechless. “Well, that’s not fair,” he managed. “I’m tired.”
“Not a bad way to spend a Sunday night,” Sirius mused. His sneaky squeeze of Remus’ ass did not go unnoticed. “In my personal opinion, of course.”
“Of course,” Remus said drily. Maybe a shower wasn’t the worst idea after all. His knees weren’t nearly sore enough yet.
#remus lupin#sirius black#coops#smut#my fic#fanfic#sweater weather#vaincre#lumosinlove#lingerie#subspace#subdrop
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the one where you walked me home (porco x reader fic)
the one where you walked me home (porco x reader)
contents: porco x fem reader, mentions of marcel galliard, childhood friends, best friends to lovers, fluff, pining, alternate universe - college/university, modern au, bisexuality, smoking, porco galliard-centric
rating: teen and up audiences
summary: When he walks her home that night, Porco realizes he might have feelings for his childhood best friend. He has no idea in hell how to deal with it but he tries.
word count: 5079
notes: i just thought it'd be interesting to try writing a modern au porco/reader fic in a more porco-centric POV. what i try to do here is explore how he deals with the soft sappy feelings of slowly realizing he's in love since he's pretty bad at emotions and even more so when it's not a [strong, violent type of feeling]
*fic loosely based on this song:
*this is also cross-posted on ao3
***
2:40 AM at an empty parking lot behind a 7-Eleven. The nearest lamp post flickers weakly with its dimming orange light as Porco sets down his third empty beer can on the concrete with a yawn.
“Hey,” he says, lightly shrugging the shoulder against which she leaned her head on. She doesn’t budge from beside him. He rubs the lethargy off his eyes.
They’ve been sitting on this parking block for almost three hours now-- since they left the gig hours ago at the pub just across the university. They’d just spent the past few hours ranting about midterms and how fucked up alienated labor is along with the absence of ethical consumption under capitalism-- and how everyone is forced to participate in it, talking about trips they’d like to make in and outside the city, their ideal lovers, and anxieties about the future. This was a thing they did now and then, usually on Fridays and Saturdays-- seeking a kind of cathartic escape from their hectic academic life in each other’s company. A friendly rendezvous they’d jokingly call dates every now and then.
He leans forward just enough to get a peek at her face, partly obscured by the mess of hair that had fallen in front of her eyes.
So she’s asleep.
His eyes dart towards their things lumped together beside her feet-- their backpacks sitting atop an A4-size sketchbook along with the last unopened beer can.
Porco idly clinks his finger against the top of the beer can he had just emptied as he breathes out a wistful sigh.
Somehow, she always reminded him of his long-gone brother. Not to say that she shared even a bit of Marcel's fairly easygoing yet charming demeanor. Because she was far from that. She was loud with a crude mouth-- more like Porco himself, really-- except that she at least was kinder, more pleasantly charismatic towards other people than himself. And in that way, yes, she did remind him of Marcel. But there were other things-- pastimes and memories that reminded him of his brother when she came to mind. They’d known each other even as kids. Back in middle school, Porco remembers how she’d visit their home on the weekends so the three of them could build a Lego city which Marcel himself had drafted on the back of one of his sketchbooks. Those two were always quite the artists even as kids-- Porco recalls fondly. His brother had been the one to introduce her to Porco during one of those weekends. He didn’t like it at first-- how Marcel would seem to pay more attention to her at times as they animatedly sketched parts of the city on paper in the middle of assembling the Lego blocks. He’d eventually learned to be tolerant of her presence at least as the weekends passed by and the city gradually came to life-- vast with skyscrapers, houses, trees, vehicles, and lamp posts. Porco distinctly remembers building a garden with her beside a house that resembled the Galliard residence. He had assembled the green pieces that resembled leaf blades onto the flat Lego board, while she topped them off with tiny colorful flower pieces. It was honestly quite fun and it became a thing he eventually looked forward to on the weekends with Marcel.
But all things come to an end and at times, at points where they feel like they’re not supposed to. Porco knows this well.
In Marcel’s old room, the city remains hidden away, unfinished.
It was on a rainy day when Marcel had met an accident on his way home with a schoolmate. Onlookers had witnessed him racing against the red light to push Reiner away from the path of an incoming vehicle.
Even if it was an accident, Porco despises Reiner after that. He'd decided to never talk to him after the incident but as fate would ridiculously have it, they’d meet again in high school-- as classmates, nonetheless, to his dismay.
It was after this same incident that Porco had grown closer to her-- the only other person who possibly knew Marcel almost nearly as he himself did. She knew about the city and she knew about his sketches, after all. In the first few days after his brother’s wake, they’d simply talk about Marcel as they walked home together after school and how they both missed him. Those walks home would eventually involve detours at the nearest Mcdonald’s where they’d get nuggets and buy a Happy Meal-- the ones that came in flimsy cardboard packaging printed with colorful cartoon mascots-- for the sake of getting the collectibles that came with them. It was a thing they never really grew out of. Even now, as college kids, whenever they’d find themselves eating out together at the nearest Mcdonald’s after their Philosophy classes scheduled on Tuesdays and Thursdays, they’d get themselves a Happy Meal, even if they sometimes earned puzzled looks from the cashier as they engaged in quick, petty quarrels as to which collectible they should get.
Soon, Porco feels her shuffle in her seat beside him, the weight of her head now off his shoulder. She rubs the sleep off her eyes with a yawn.
“...should go home,” she drawls, accidentally kicking one of the empty beer cans sprawled in front of them on the concrete. It lands right at the feet of a passer-by who in turn shoots her a cold glare before kicking the can back in her direction. "I-- hey, uh, sorry about that," she apologizes, louder than necessary. Said passer-by only clicks their tongue in annoyance as they raised a middle finger at her before walking away with a muffled swear under their breath.
She exchanges incredulous, befuddled looks with Porco for a few silent moments before eventually letting out a snort and bursting into a fit of stupidly drunken laughter with him.
“...is what I mean… fucking capitalism... makesnasshole out ofveryone,” she remarks, broken phrases drawn out in between chuckles. “Yeah, yeah. I got it for the tenth time,” Porco says, laughing with a roll of his eyes. He stands up and stretches out a hand in front of her. “Now can we go home? Can’t exactly start a revolution when the alcohol’s fucked you up that bad,” he says with an impatient sigh.
“Yeah? How do you know? Did Karl Marx write that?” She languidly takes his hand.
“No, but-- fucking… well, I don’t know. Maybe? Indirectly? I mean, we did just give in to consumerism,” Porco says with a sharp click of his tongue as he pulls her up to stand.
“Well… yeah. I guess so.”
“Anyway.” Porco places a palm at the top of her head and urges her to face him. “You seem more out of it than me. I’m walking you home this time, alright?
”She shrugs languidly. “Sure, whatever,” she says, her words muffled as she falls face first into his chest.
--
“Give me the fucking keys,” he says coarsely after her third failed attempt at unlocking the door to her own flat. In the dim light of the hall, Porco tries to make out the shape of what he recognizes as the right one among the five keys dangling from her keychain. He sighs, frustrated as he finally unlocks the door.
“How the hell did you--?” Confused, she eyes the keys still dangling from the door. “Why wouldn’t it open when it was me?”
“For the love of--” Porco runs a palm down across his face with an exasperated sigh. “You were forcing the wrong key.”
“Oh.” She snorts trying to stifle a chuckle. Porco pulls the keys from the door and hands them to her along with the sketchbook he’d been carrying.
“Thanks.” She gives the door a light push before finally taking a step into the flat. And then a sudden stop. She pockets her keys and lets the sketchbook fall on the carpeted floor of the foyer. She tilts her head pensively for a few moments, staring blankly at the darkness of her room. Porco raises an eyebrow in confusion. She turns on her heel to face him again.
“What is it?” he asks.
She stands on the tips of her toes, eyeing Porco with what felt to him like newfound curiosity. She rests a hand on his shoulder to steady herself.
Her other hand soon reaches up to cradle the side of his face. It comes as a surprise, but not the kind that made you flinch or visibly react in some way. This was simply… unexpected. Weird. And somehow new.
She’s looking at me. And she’s looking like she’s waiting.
And what is she waiting for, exactly? He feels a nervous lump in his throat, swallows it down. He has half the mind to lean his face closer as he, too, looks at her-- and he looks at her like he’s waiting.
Alas, whatever this is-- it ends where it feels like it’s not supposed to.
“‘Night, Porco,” she says with a feeble smile before falling back flatly on her feet.
“Yeah. You too. I’ll see you around,” he says, tentatively glancing at his side.She crouches down to lazily pick up the sketchbook before finally entering her flat again. Porco catches her giving him a tiny wave through the crack of the door moments before she completely pushes it closed. He bids her goodbye with a curt nod.
Once the door closes, he rolls up the sleeve of his jacket to check the time.
3:15 AM. Porco raises a palm to his cheek. The ghost of her touch lingers on his skin.
***
“Are you serious?” Porco scoffs. “Y/N, you’re not even watching the film.” He leans his head against his palm with his arm resting on the side of the couch.
“Sure I am,” she says, unpinning her hair before letting her head fall on his lap. As she types out a message on her phone, Porco manages to make out Pieck’s name at the top of the chat box.
“You keep checking your phone.”
“It’s fine. We’ve both seen this film before anyway. I told you-- I’m just rewatching it for my paper on Nietzsche.”
“So you dragged me into this for what?”
She gives a halfhearted shrug. “I don’t know. Felt like it. Just wanted to bother you for a good film.” She finally sets aside her phone to look up at Porco with a shit-eating grin. He sighs and flicks a finger against her forehead. “Ow. What the fuck.”
“At least try to look like you’re actually watching,” Porco says, turning her head to face the TV screen.
"Fine, fine," she says with a grimace as she kneads the pain away on her forehead.
They’re now about an hour into Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. As lovers Joel and Clementine ran through the memories-- hand in hand mapping the history of their relationship-- the ups and downs-- scenes of the two playfully mocking the film at a drive-in theater, a stroll through the flea market leading into talks of having a child, lovemaking underneath the covers as Clementine told Joel about her insecurities rooting from childhood-- all these small intimacies that nonetheless revealed to each other their flawed, detestable selves along with reasons they probably shouldn’t be together, Porco realizes it.
He looks at her, notes the way the flicker of the TV screen daintily lit up her solemn face and how she’d break into a smile every now and then. She’d brush the back of her hand against his knee and point at the TV screen to tell him that this was among her favorite parts so he absolutely had to pay close attention. A bit funny considering she was the one who wasn’t paying much attention to the film during the first part, Porco thinks. At least she’s watching now, even as he can’t help but watch her instead.
As he absentmindedly brushes a hand against her hair, he wonders if they could be something more, wonders if they’d be anything like Joel and Clementine-- imperfect, but nonetheless worthwhile. They’d known each other since they were kids and he can definitely make a list of things he doesn’t like about her-- like the way she’s too loud and frisky and never seemed to take the right things seriously, how scatterbrained she was that she’d forget the schedule for a midterm exam and how her room always seemed to be in shambles, the way she was so stubborn she’d easily get upset at something as simple as choosing to eat at a fast food different from the one she insisted on, how she’d smoke in his dorm no matter how many times he’d told her that she could get him in trouble for it. But it's not like he's perfect either. She’d told him that he came on too headstrong at times and that’s why a lot of people felt intimidated by him-- a trait that had gotten him into fights and eventually, long afternoons of detention back in high school. She says she hates the way he thought himself too strong to cry in front of anyone and how he’d grown dismissive of opening up to her as they got older. Whenever they’d get into heated fights, she’d tell him that all you ever are is angry and how he was pretty shit at saying sorry like he meant it. And despite all of these, they had remained close friends over the years. They’d promised each other that they’d get better-- slowly, but surely-- even if that was something easier said than done. He could live with that. He would.
***
“Hey, uh--” Porco breathes out a puff of smoke as he hands her the cigarette. He gazes distantly at the parade of city lights before them-- from the headlamps of the vehicles passing below them on the bridge, the streetlights, and the buildings overhead. “--do you still like Pieck?”
She suddenly lets out a cough and a puff of smoke at that. She gapes at Porco incredulously.
“Pock, it’s been three years since we broke up. And that was high school.”
“Look, I know that, but--” he sighs. “I was just wondering.”
She laughs. “That’s not really what you wanted to ask, is it? There’s something else.” She raises an eyebrow at Porco. He rolls his eyes at that, irked at how easily she could read him. “So ask.” She passes him the cigarette and he takes a drag of it.
“Ok--” he says with a sigh. “--Have you liked any other girls after her?”
She raises an eyebrow, intrigued.
“No, not really. Nothing serious, at least. I mean, I did have a crush on this girl who sat beside me in English class during freshman year. But... that was freshman year, you know? Nothing ever really came of it. And you know I would have told you if something actually did, anyway."
“I see.”
“There’s more you want to ask,” she says with a cheeky smile.
“Ok. Fine.” Another drag of the cigarette. “How about-- boys? Have you liked any guy at all since then?” The city lights blur against the filter of smoke. Porco refuses to meet her eyes even as he feels her gaze on him-- heavy with something he could not exactly put his finger on. He knows she’s not smiling anymore and from his periphery, he thinks he senses a swallow in her throat. She turns to the city overhead.
“Yes, actually.” She takes the cigarette from him, smiling fondly upon the light brush of their fingers. “I-- you know, even though I’ve known for a long time that I liked both guys and girls, I still find myself doubting that sometimes. When I’m attracted to a girl, I sometimes think that maybe I was just gay all along. And now that I find myself actually liking a boy again, a part of me entertains the thought that maybe me liking girls was just a phase and maybe I was straight all along. But... I just know it’s not like that. And yet, what people say still gets to me-- they’ve got a way of making you think that being bi isn’t a real thing. Even though it is. I know because... I’m real, right?”
“Yeah. You are. You’re… you’re here.” The corner of his lips turn up as he says it. “I get it. I mean, I think I’m the same.”
“Really?” She turns to gape at him.
“I suppose I’ve never told you this either because it’s so fucking embarrassing, but…” He sighs defeatedly, kneading his temples with unease. “...I made out with Reiner in high school.”
She regards him with a scandalized look.
“Dude, what the fuck. I thought you hated the guy.”
“I do, alright? It’s just that… teenage hormones and shit. I was stupid and he’s stupid. I-- I don’t know what I was thinking that time. But… I do wonder sometimes--” He scratches his head tentatively. “--what my brother was thinking rushing in to save him from that accident. Like… just what did he see in that meathead that was worth saving?”
“And did you find your answer to that when you were making out?”
Porco eyes her with a deathly glare.
“Fuck you.”
“Oh, so you did,” she says with an impish grin.
Porco flicks a finger against her forehead.
“Ow-- hey! Stop that,” she says with a grimace. “I mean, I don’t blame you. Reiner’s hot.”
He clicks his tongue at the remark before hastily seizing the cigarette from her grasp to take another drag. "Not like he's the only guy I ever found ho-- I mean liked."
She laughs.
"We should head back," he says coldly.
"Sure.” She nods. “Though… is there anything else you wanted to ask?"
As the filter of smoke hangs between them, Porco wonders about the boy she likes.
He shakes his head. "No. It's nothing."
***
“It was like deja vu,” Porco says, sighing into his phone as he shifts to lie near the edge of his bed. “Except in this dream… before she said goodnight, we, uh--”
“You kissed?” Pieck suggests from the other line.
“Well… yeah.” He puts a palm to cover his face, feeling the flush on his cheeks as he says it.
“So you like her,” Pieck says, almost breaking into a chuckle.
“I, uh…”
“I get it. She’s charming and reminds you of Marcel.”
“That’s…”
“I’ll be honest with you.” She sighs and Porco senses a smile from her tone. “Remember when I said I broke up with her because uni was getting too busy? The truth is that… I feel like you two always seemed to get along better than I ever could with her-- and it probably has to do with Marcel. When I realized that, I’ll admit I did start to feel jealous. I thought back then that you two might eventually get together. After all, you two were both still in high school, while I was already away in uni. It left me distraught for months so I just... decided to break it off. Don’t get me wrong, though. It’s been years and it’s not like I haven’t dated anyone else since then. And in hindsight, that just might have been for the best. I mean, you confiding in me about her right now-- I think-- is a testament to that. Because you realized it too, didn’t you?”
“Oh." He pauses. "I never thought that you-- Pieck, look, I--”
“Pock, if you feel guilty about it just because I used to date her, don’t. It’s not anyone’s fault. That… that she just loved you first. It’s circumstance. She met you and Marcel first before me.”
That she loved you first. As Porco echoes the words in his head, he becomes acutely aware of the beating in his chest and the warmth swarming his face. He buries his face in a pillow and screams into it.
“Hey, Pock? You ok there?” Pieck chuckles.
“How do I-- you think I should tell her?”
“Well, it’s the honest thing to do. And I genuinely think you don’t stand to lose much by doing so. Even if by the littlest chance of her not returning your feelings, I don’t think confessing would ruin your friendship. Might be a little awkward at first, but I don’t think she’ll end up hating or avoiding you at all.”
“You sure you’re not just sayi--”
“No, Pock. I’m not just saying this because we’re friends. I’m saying it because it’s what makes sense.”
“Ok, well… thanks,” he sighs. “And by the way… I’m sorry I called you this early. I know you’re probably busy especially since it’s your thesis year.”
“It’s fine. I’m glad you told me. Frankly, I do find satisfaction in knowing my speculations are correct. And you guys… you two are more predictable than you think-- if I’m being honest,” Pieck laughs.
“Well, I suppose being predictable isn’t so bad… if you’re right.”
Once they bid each other goodbye on the phone, Porco remains sprawled across the bed staring blankly at the ceiling. He rests a palm on his cheek, internally cursing Marcel as he feels the warmth streaming his face once again.
***
“Fuck,” Porco swears under his breath as they both ran towards the car, their feet splashing against the puddled ground as the rain cascades. A looming thunder rolls across the night sky as they make it to the safety of the vehicle.
“So… still not convinced that trying to get a Happy Meal on a rainy Friday at midnight was a bad idea?” Porco says, trying to catch his breath as he sets down the paper bag on the space between their seats.
“Well, I’ll admit it kinda sucked that you had to have your car still parked in school. And in my defense, I didn't expect the drizzle to cascade so soon on the way back. But you know what? It’s fine. We got what we needed and that’s all that matters. I’ll stand by this being a good idea.” She laughs as she peels off her drenched jacket. “Oh, by the way, where can I put this?”
“Just put it in the backseat,” Porco says as he peeled off his own jacket.
“Got it. Here, give me yours too,” she says before turning to place both of their drenched jackets in the backseat.
“Thanks.” Porco switches on the car’s dome light and the windshield wipers. The car’s interior now warmly lit, he rummages inside the paper bag, then hands her a box of chicken nuggets along with a plastic fork. “You want the fries now or later?”
“Later’s good. Thanks.” Porco acknowledges her with a nod, then leans back on the car seat with a languished sigh.
The rain patters incessantly against the windows over the rhythm of the windshield wipers. The faint yellow glow lulls from the ceiling of his car. He recalls a rainy evening spent staring out the window as he nervously waited for Marcel to come home. A distant memory weighs heavy on his eyelids.
“Porco. Are you ok?”
“What? Yeah.” Porco shifts lightly in his seat, slightly startled. “I just… remembered something.”
“What is it?”
“The rain. It just reminded me of Marcel.”
“Oh. Right.”
“Yeah.”
“You know, he was…” She puts down her food and lightly wipes the sides of her mouth with the back of her hand. “Back then, I considered him as something a little more than a best friend. I like that he liked my drawings and how he never made fun of them… even though he was ways better than me at it,” she recalls fondly.
He scoffs. “So… are you guilt-tripping me for something I said about your drawings when we were twelve?”
“You were an asshole, but you should be glad I’m past that.” She rolls her eyes with a sigh. “All I’m saying now is that Marcel was... really special to me.”
“What-- did you have a crush on Marcel or something?”
She snorts. “You could say... it was something like that. Yeah.”
Figures. He nonchalantly crosses his arms in front of his chest. The pattering rain fills in the lull in their conversation.
“I like your drawings too,” he finally says.
“That’s why I drag you along every time I go out to draw. You like watching me, right?” She teasingly raises an eyebrow as she says it.
“Well, sure.” He shrugs awkwardly in his seat.
“Tell me. What else do you like?”
“I don’t know. Let’s see…” he sighs, feigning annoyance with a roll of his eyes. “I like it when I’m in the middle of pulling an all-nighter at Tim Hortons… and you go on and disturb me just to get a Happy Meal on a rainy Friday midnight.”
“Yeah?” she chuckles. “What else?”
Porco turns to glance at her. As she meets him with a playful grin, his mind races with answers.
I like it when you steal my jacket and you leave me to freeze to death in the cold of the cafe’s AC. I like it when you go on a chaotic, semi-coherent drunken rant about how badly you want capitalism dismantled. I like it when you remember Marcel. I like your hair. I like how your hands unpin your hair before you rest your head on my lap.
He scoffs-- more in reaction to his own thoughts than at her teasing. Who knew he could be that embarrassingly sappy? “What are you… getting at?”
“Nevermind.” She shakes her head, still smiling. She laughs while timidly raising a palm to her cheek. “Can we share your fries now?”
***
“So I’m thinking of getting a tattoo,” Porco says, settling himself on the dormitory steps faintly lit by the porch lights hanging on both sides of the entrance.
“Cool. So where do you want it?” She sits beside him while setting down her things-- a shoulder bag and a sketchbook on the concrete step.
“I was just thinking on my arm,” he says, pointing a finger at a spot on his skin.
“What do you want it to look like?”
“Not sure yet.”
“I could draw you one.”
“Yeah?”
“Sure. I could do it right now.”
“Really?”
She takes the ballpoint pen out of the spring of her sketchbook and begins to doodle something on his arm. Covering her drawing with a cupped palm, she chuckles while mischievously peering up at him.
“I swear to god, if you’re drawing something embarrassing-- Oh, fuck you.” Porco laughs, managing to take a peek at the ink drawing of a cartoon porcupine with the hair on its head stylishly pushed back. Below the drawing, it writes 'porcopine.' He pulls his arm away from her grasp.
"What? You don't like it?" She grimaces.
"Porcopine? Really?"
“What? It's cute,” she says with an offended click of her tongue, reaching for his arm once again.
Below the word 'porcopine,' she then writes the phrase 'i <3 you.'
Porco furrows his brows upon reading the phrase, then lets out a chuckle. “What does this--?” he asks, pointing out the inked words on his skin.
“What do you mean? It is what it is.”
“You mean it?”
“Of course I do.”
“How do you mean it?”
She tilts her head pensively and squints at Porco as she gathers how to describe exactly what she meant. She supposes that he’s right-- a clarification was indeed necessary. This kind of thing could get confusing, after all. When you’ve known each other for so long in a relationship such as this, lines tend to blur. One day, you could both feel like the bestest of friends, and then like lovers the next.
“I mean it in a way that I wouldn’t mind marrying you.”
“Oh.” Porco gapes at her for a moment. “Ok,” he says, letting out an awkward chuckle.
“What’s with that reaction? I’m serious, Pock.”
“I just… I mean, to be honest…” He furrows his brows, carefully pondering his words. “I wouldn’t mind marrying you either.” Porco scratches his head sheepishly.
“Ok then,” she chuckles, shifting in her seat to face him. “We could build something. Something bigger than a Lego house. Maybe one with a garden. A story with a perfect ending.”
“Yeah? And if it’s not perfect, what then?”
“Something worthwhile, then. An ending that feels like an ending.”
“Ok. I can live with that,” he laughs.
“Porco.”
As she cradles his face in between her palms, Porco becomes acutely aware of the flush in his cheeks.
Then, slowly, she leans closer to gingerly place a kiss at the tip of his nose.
They soon find themselves both chuckling at what was probably the most blatantly romantic gesture between them thus far.
“So, uh, what are we now, exactly?” he asks awkwardly as they soon pull away.
She shrugs. “Lovers? Best friends who would marry each other? Though the latter is kind of a mouthful if you ask me.”
“Yeah. Let’s go with that first one.”
“Say, Porco.” She tilts her head questioningly at him. “You want to tell me how this night ends?”
“How the hell should I--”
She puts a finger to his lips and shakes her head. “Hey. Lovers now, remember? I’m not the only one telling this story. So tell me.”
“Ok. Let’s see,” he sighs. And so he indulges her. “It ends with you beside me. We’re lying down on my bed.”
“Clothed or naked?”
He gapes. “Are you seriously even consi--”
She flicks a finger against his forehead as she regards him with a mischievous smile. “Just answer the question.”
“Ok, fine,” he resigns, lightly kneading his forehead. “Look, I want to say naked because my AC’s broken ri--”
“Naked it is, then.”
“Clothed.” He glares. “For tonight.”
“Fine, fine,” she says, scratching her head in resignation. “You sure you’re not having second thoughts about letting me stay tonight, though? Not worried you might wake up with a bunch of porcopines on your face? Or I don’t know-- dick drawings?”
“Fuck off,” he says with a chuckle.
“So… what is it, really? You want me to stay or you want me to go?”
Porco sighs before slowly leaning his face closer to hers.
“I want you to stay,” he says against her cheek, before placing a chaste kiss on her skin. “Whatever I wake up to in the morning, I’m sure it’s worth it.”
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Hey guys !!! I hope everyone in this wonderful fandom is doing amazing <3 Recently, my friend and I have come up with a very interesting and fun event that we're hoping you all would like to participate in. We haven't really seen surprise prompts and drabble weeks for Levihan before, so we decided to make one! Also a very fun contest with cool awards too.
Getting straight to the point, the reason why this event is different from an usual prompt week is because we are only going to be focusing on drabbles here. (And also because the prompts won't be predetermined and given to you beforehand)
(Note: this is also open to artists and other content creators. We will be making another post tomorrow explaining how the event works for them. Till then, the writers can continue)
✒ A drabble is a short work of fiction of precisely one hundred words in length. The purpose of the drabble is brevity, testing the author's ability to express interesting and meaningful ideas in a confined space. (YeS I stole it from google)
As a writer myself, due to the limited word limit, drabbles can be a bit of a struggle sometimes, and that is primarily the reason why this whole event is also somewhat more of a writing practice (other than the fact that we need to get those numbers on AO3 up haha)
Without wasting much time, let's get straight into the details, and how this is really going to work, what are surprise prompts and the contest and its awards of course.
▶ How long are your entries really supposed to be? Well Google says 100 words but that's way too unfair so your fic should be = to or under 1000 words. The maximum you can go up to is 1500.
▶ Are there any certain prompts/themes these drabbles should be on? Yes, and that's what we are going to talk about next.
▶ And what are surprise prompts? Okay so remember back when in school, your annoying math teacher would take a surprise quiz out of nowhere without informing you? Yeah something like that but its not that bad. Also, its a lot more fun than math.
Basically your prompts will be given to you a day before you need to post them. so its really just a writing practice and there is no pressure, so don't think about the quality or something. This is about scribbling down something quick without a lot of planning.
The prompts are also going to be chosen from an OTP prompt generator, so they are going to be uhm interesting and fun to work.
We have a theme for each day (like angst, fluff etc) and the mods will choose 4 random prompts beforehand for each of these days. At the time of giving the prompts to the participants, we will run a machine to choose one randomly out of the 4. So even the mods don't know what the actual prompt is going to be for the day.
The themes for each day (except Wednesdays and Thursdays, we will get to them later)
Angst Mondays
Trope Tuesdays
Fluff Fridays
Comic Saturdays (this is for the artists, so you can ignore it)
Smut Sundays
Now, here's the challenge (and probably my favorite part about the event) -- The prompts you get are not exclusively going to be in accordance with the themes for each day.
For example, you can definitely get this for Angst Mondays :
Prompt : "Levi having to rescue Hange from a pack of kittens/puppies."
Now its up to you, with the power of levihan on your side, to write an angsty drabble based on this prompt, (okay fine, the prompts probably won't be this off bat but still)
**Exception, : for trope Tuesdays, you won't be getting a prompt but a particular trope like (enemies to lovers, protective levi, caring hange etc)
▶ What time will you exactly get the prompt then? So basically, if Levihan drabble week begins on Tuesday, 25th May, you will getting your trope (prompt for the other days) around Monday afternoon-ish. And you are allowed to post until Tuesday midnight, before Wednesday begins. (Wednesday and Thursday are contest days which we will talk about later, so you don't have to worry about getting another prompt on Tuesday and finishing it on Wednesday itself)
▶How will you get your prompt? And any other details? We'll be making another post later where we will dive deep into the timezone specifics and how you will get the prompt, and what you will tag your posts with so we can see your stuff and reblog it.
You will get the prompt for fluff Friday around Thursday afternoon, and then the writers will have a break as Saturday is for artists. Friday night, you will get the prompt for smut Sunday you will have Saturday as a break in between before posting your smut on Sunday.
The same formula applies to angst Mondays.
1st June, Tuesday, last day of the week will be the prize day. We are gonna talk about the prize day in the next section.
Wednesday and Thursdays (The contest days)
So, first of all, this is optional. If you are participating in the rest of the drabble week, its okay if you leave to opt out of the contest. Similarly, you can also just participate in the contest and not do the other days. It's up to you.
The people participating in the contest would be divided into two groups. There are going to be two winners.
Suppose we have group 1 and group 2, a random participant from each group will be chosen. This chosen participant is called the selector. Its purely luck and a machine that chooses the selector. The selector gets to choose a prompt (from a list the mods will give them) Suppose the said selector is from group 1, then the prompt they chose will be given to group two, and everyone in group two have to write on that. The selector from group two will do the same thing for group 1 members.
All of the preparation for the contest will be done beforehand, and the selectors will be informed before the week begins. The selected prompts will be given to both groups Tuesday night. By Thursday evening their works should be posted.
The word limit for Contest Drabbles can be extended to 3000 words. This is ONLY for the contest.
After all works are submitted by Thursday evening, there will be a voting period which will stretch till 1st June, Tuesday. During this period, group 1 will read group 2's stuff, and group 2 will do the same for group 1. Then they will vote for their favorite fics accordingly, the fic with the maximum votes from both groups wins. The mods will be supervising this, and reading the stuff too.
▶How do we vote? All the details related to voting will also be explained in a different post.
▶What are the awards? Okay, so one thing unique about drabble week is that there are going to be no permanent mods. We will probably have these events rather frequently, and the mods will change for each event. The mods will decide the awards so different awards for different months.
This month, the gifts are :
Well detailed and long comments on 2 chapters of a fic of your choice. These can also be two different one shots if you want.
Beta reading for a few (3-4 chapters) for any fic the winner wants (the other details can be discussed in dms)
The winners will have the opportunity/chance to become mods for the next week, next month. This is also a great way to make new friends and work with them while holding an event!
To participate, PLEASE FILL OUT THIS FORM. The last date to fill in is 20th May, so do it before that. We'll be making another post for the artists soon, posting it tomorrow most likely. You will be constantly updated, so don't worry!
if anyone has any questions, feel free to ask. Thank you so much, we will be looking forward for your participation! Much love.
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The Onyx Ring | 6
Draco Malfoy x Reader
Summary: Chapter six of the Silver Letter series. It’s their sixth year, Draco and the reader are placed in an arranged marriage by their pureblood families, expected to follow through they navigate their feelings for each other amongst the many other social pressures at Hogwarts.
Warnings:
Word Count: 8.2k
A/N: So, I am middle-eastern and I rarely find the opp. in fics for that to fit, and since I talk about family history in this chapter I wanted to make the reader’s ethnicity open ended. Just keep that in mind when the reader’s family history comes up. Also note that I made some changes here and in chp. 5 to incorporate titles because I can ;)
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
You spent Wednesday and Thursday holed up with Draco in his room healing. The wounds on your back pertinent and angry; the pain there to remind you of your sins against the family no matter what you did or what you took. Not only that but you knew the scars he left would last, layered atop the old. In order to gain some privacy, Draco had told Narcissa that you’d broken your leg and that you were just waiting on the potion to do its job, it usually took two to three days, so the lie served its purpose, and Narcissa left you both alone in order to allow you to heal. The entire time you virtually didn’t leave Draco’s bed, he’d go to your room if you wanted a book or a particular sweater, although admittedly, you were using the situation as an excuse to wear Draco’s. Zilsey would bring you both food and magically tend to your wounds so that Draco wouldn’t have to risk getting in trouble for using magic outside of school.
Throughout Thursday, you laid in Draco’s arms as he read your classic muggle books aloud to you, although you were keen on forcing him to read your favourite, Pride and Prejudice. Less because you wanted to read it, which you certainly did, but more because you wanted him to read it.
“‘Oh! She is the most beautiful creature I ever beheld! But there is one of her sisters sitting down just behind you, who is very pretty, and I dare say very agreeable. Do let me ask my partner to introduce you.’
‘Which do you mean?’ and turning round he looked for a moment at Elizabeth, till catching her eye, he withdrew his own and coldly said: ‘She is tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt me; I am in no humour at present to give consequence to young ladies who are slighted by other men. You had better return to your partner and enjoy her smiles, for you are wasting your time with me.’” Draco paused after reading the section aloud
“Mmm,” you breathed as you looked up at him. “Why have you stopped?”
“Well, doesn’t he know that Elizabeth can hear him? I mean, that’s quite rude,” Draco huffed, and you giggled despite the pain it caused in your ribs.
“Draco, it is just a story,” you smiled, amused by his investment so early into the novel.
“Yes, but Elizabeth is clearly too good for him,” he said, still frustrated with the fictional Mr. Darcy’s actions.
“Merlin, I wonder how she feels,” you teased him, lightly referring to your own situation.
“I wasn’t ever this mean to you,” he huffed.
“Draco, don’t challenge me on this. As you will indeed lose. Now, unless you want such a lecture, I suggest that you continue reading,” you said playfully.
“Is that all I am to you, an audible library?” Draco asked, mocking pain.
“Yes, dear, that is the only reason why I lie here so that I can use you for that deeply, handsome voice of yours.”
“Fine then,” he said as he returned his gaze to the book. “Mr. Bingley followed his advice. Mr. Darcy walked off; and Elizabeth remained with no very cordial feelings toward him.”
“Draco,” you interrupted, your voice plainly displaying that you were not paying attention.
“Yes?” he asked, looking away from the book again.
“Come here,” you muttered as you propped yourself up on your elbows in an attempt to get closer to his lips.
“Are you trying to distract me from Jane Austen with physical affection?” he asked, sounding as you had truly hurt his feelings.
“Just one?” you asked, “Then I will let my library get back to his very important duties.”
“Fine,” he huffed as he leaned down and caught your lips with his. The kiss was warm and pleasant, and it made you forget about your pain for a moment as you were happy to lose yourself in his soft lips. “Is that what you wanted?” He asked after you both pulled away.
“Precisely,” you said, an entirely satisfied smile gracing your face.
“Good,” he said, smirking, but glad to see you in such good spirits considering you spent most of Wednesday in and out of panic attacks and nightmares. It pained him to see you in such a state, yet it comforted him that he was able to be there for you through it.
You lowered yourself back down and laid your head on Draco’s thigh as he cleared his throat and continued reading. “She told the story, however, with great spirit among her friends; for she had a lively, playful disposition, which delighted in anything ridiculous.”
The two of you spent the rest of the day reading, Draco pausing anytime he had questions or a vote of confidence for Elizabeth, becoming increasingly excited by Lizzie and Mr. Darcy’s interactions. While you continuously had to remind him that you did not intend on spoiling the book for him. You found it interesting how things had shifted between the two of you since just yesterday; you didn’t know that you’d had it within you to trust him the way that you suddenly did. You were sure that you would hate him till you were on your deathbed, and you had been determined to push away any feelings for him. Somehow you now found yourself laying in his lap, essentially trusting him with your life, your secrets, and your traumas, essentially handing your heart to him on a golden platter. And you were nervous to go back to school, that the petty drama, secrets, sneaking around, and lies would return to your relationship, but you refused to dwell on that for the time being.
Friday morning, while you were still asleep, Draco snuck out of bed to find his mother, he was determined to protect you from your parents, and after what they did to you, he didn’t want them back in his house. Aside from the wedding, he didn’t want them around you at all. He was sure that if he told his mum the truth about what happened, she would feel the same way. Draco dressed and made his way downstairs to the kitchen, where he knew his mother would be. Since his dad has been in Azkaban, she had stopped eating in the dining room instead, taking her breakfasts early in the kitchen.
“Mother,” Draco greeted as he entered the kitchen.
“Draco dear, how is Y/n’s leg?” Narcissa asked, setting down her copy of the Daily Prophet when she noted her son’s entrance.
“That’s what I was hoping to speak with you about,” he said as he leaned against the kitchen island. “Leave us, elf,” he assumed the traits he was raised to bear easily around his mum, and Zilsey quickly skittered out of the kitchen.
“Is something wrong?” She asked.
“Well, she didn’t break her leg mum, Wednesday when Sir Y/l/n pulled her away from lunch, she didn’t trip and break her leg, her father beat her nearly to death, he used the splitting curse on her, she had nearly bled out by the time I found her,” Draco explained. “Now, I don’t want either of them over again except for the wedding, and even then, I don’t want them having any contact or control over her.”
“Draco, it is not our place to interfere in the way William and Layah choose to discipline their children,” Narcissa said, hiding the pain she felt for her future daughter-in-law with complete neutrality.
“Excuse me? You’ve got to be joking! You should see her back; it’s been ripped to shreds by that bastard, she’s got a bloody scar reaching from her eye to the bottom of her face, and no potion or spell has been able to get rid of it,” exclaimed Draco in anger.
“Draco,” Narcissa warned, her voice remaining low and quiet.
“Don’t do that. Just because you can’t stand up for me when father reprimands me doesn’t mean you have to let the same thing happen to her.”
“Draco,” Narcissa repeated, her voice tighter this time, rising from her seat. “If her parents have decided that she has done something that demands scolding, then they will handle that as they see fit. It is not our place to interfere. And you shall not be referring to your future father-in-law with such language.”
Draco pushed the tears that were pooling in the back of his eyes away, he refused to show such weakness in front of his mother. “How could you simply turn a blind eye to this?” He questioned. When he was met with dead silence, he nodded, “I see, mother, I will be retiring to my room then,” he said, turning to leave.
“Before you go,” she said, stopping her son in his tracks although Draco did not turn to face his mother. “I expect you to propose to Y/n using the family ring tomorrow night as is expected in our families traditions, I believe you have the ring?”
Draco simply nodded in confirmation before striding out of the kitchen.
Narcissa remained standing with her head held high, only collapsing into her seat when she was sure that Draco was half-way back to his room. She pushed all thoughts of the torture you endured at the hands of your parents, her friends, out of her head.
When Draco made his way back to his room, he found you out of bed and nowhere to be found, which he thought to be a bit worrisome.
“Y/n?” He called.
“I’m in your closet,” you called, and he let out a sigh of relief and collapsed onto his bed.
“It sounds like you’re feeling better,” he commented, although you could hear the distress in his voice.
“I am, it still hurts, but it’s nothing I haven’t felt before,” you said as you stepped out of his closet in a perfectly oversized white knit sweater of his and one of your pairs of jeans. “Although it sounds like you have something going on, does it happen to have anything to do with where you disappeared to this morning?”
“I just had a conversation with my mother,” he said as he dropped his head into his hands.
You sat next to him and put a kind hand on his shoulder, “do you want to talk about it, or do you want to go walk around the gardens?”
“Let’s get outside, the sun is out, and it’d be nice to show you around out there,” he said as he met your eyes and matched your smile, trying his best to put his conversation with his mum out of his head.
“Sounds lovely,” you said as you stood up and reached a hand out to him.
Draco took your hand and stood up, but before he really could think about anything, he pulled you into a tight embrace, only knowing that he wanted to hold you as close as he could.
The hug surprised you at first, taking you off guard, but after a moment, you felt yourself melt into his arms, your two bodies fitting perfectly with one another’s as if you were meant to hold one another. He rested his head on your shoulder and continued to hold you, you could feel his desperation, and you swore to yourself that you wouldn’t be the one to let go. Although eventually, he slowly released you, taking a moment to observe you and take in your beauty.
“Ready?” he asked, his voice now somehow lower.
You simply nodded as he took your arm in his and the two of you made your way downstairs and out onto the platform that led out into Malfoy Manor’s extensive and stunning gardens. Despite the beautiful spectacle displayed before you, again, you were affronted by a cold and unnatural thing. The gardens and mazes were filled with the darkest colours nature could serve, and overlooking them were statues of cruel-looking men whom you often found stalking around in the portraits within the manor, and each of their statues was accompanied by snakes and peacocks.
The two of you silently descended into the gardens, and Draco led you into the towering maze.
“I used to run around through here when I was little. I know it like the back of my hand,” he said as he led you down one of the forks in the maze. “I don’t think anyone else in my family knows it so well.”
“It’s intimidating,” you admitted, to which he responded with a nod. “This whole place is.”
“I think they built it like that on purpose,” he admitted, leading you down another twist in the path. “Apparently, the first Lucius of our family acquired the land, and when Queen Elizabeth I rejected his hand in marriage, he retired from court and focused on the building of the manor.”
“My great-grandfather burned any proof that our family ever fraternized with muggles, although I’m sure they were title obsessed back when they could be. However, I do know that our family didn’t come to England until 1889.”
“Our families certainly are interesting,” he said with a certain level of distaste.
Since your first year, Draco had proudly boasted that his family was better than so many others, something you had always despised about him. Therefore, it amused you to see him refer to his family in any way that didn’t display reverence. You would continue with the topic, but you were sure that the trees could hear you.
Draco continued to lead you through the maze until you found yourself in a peaceful little clearing covered in an assortment of small wildflowers, the clearing resembling a small meadow, and with the clouds gone and the sun shining, you found it to be particularly lovely. In the middle lay a blanket, a basket, and a series of foods and teas laid out.
You looked over at Draco once you registered it, “How in the world did you manage this?” You asked in disbelief of what was before you.
“House-elves are pretty crafty, Y/n,” he said, a proud smirk rising to his face, and you shook your head as you laughed.
He led you over to the blanket, where a floor pillow was situated amongst all of the treats. “Draco, this is too much,” you said as he sat down on his own cushion.
“Impossible,” he said, his smirk returning to his face. “Entirely impossible to be ‘too much’ when it comes to you, darling.”
The two of you broke into the expertly prepared food and tea as you continued talking about whatever came to mind, Draco complimenting you at any opportunity he found, about how the sun made your eyes sparkle, how he loved your laugh, and so on; and with every word he spoke to you, you found yourself falling further in love with him. His voice was a perfect melody you wished would never stop playing, his eyes twinkled when you were around, and he just had you absolutely entranced. And what was even better than watching his perfectly crafted hands pour you tea was watching him finally open up to you. For a while now, you had firmly believed that there was something more to him, that he was hiding his real self from you, and now you finally had proof. You planned on talking about it more when you got back to school as you were both afraid that the walls, the trees, and the paintings were listening in on you, but you were excited to see Draco Malfoy turn into the truly good person you knew existed within him. The person that existed out of his parents control.
As you finished eating, Draco placed all of the dishes into the basket before you, exchanging them for your still unfinished copy of Pride and Prejudice. Excited, you laid down with your head in Draco’s lap, basking in the sunlight, which you hadn’t seen since you left school, as he cracked open the book and begun to read. You only had a few chapters left, and you were quite excited for him to reach the end of the novel.
You listened attentively as he read; as always, you were able to refuse yourself the indulgence of listening to him speak, “Her father had most cruelly mortified her, by what he said of Mr. Darcy’s indifference, and she could do nothing but wonder at such a want of penetration, or fear that perhaps, instead of his seeing too little, she might have fancied too much,” Draco read, turning the page and moving on to the next chapter. You cracked a smile, knowing that he would just adore what was to come.
“‘If you will thank me,’ he replied, ‘let it be for yourself alone. That the wish of giving happiness to you might add force to the other inducements which led me on, I shall not attempt to deny. But your family owe me nothing. Much as I respect them, I believe I thought only of you.’” you were excited by the joy and intention Draco was carrying in his voice, almost as if he had read ahead and practised, but when he skipped ahead a line, you knew something was up, “‘You are too generous to trifle with me. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes are unchanged, but one word from you will silence me on this subject forever.’” Draco read as he delicately placed a silver ring decorated with curving leaves and set with a small amber gem in the centre on the top of your hand, which was resting lazily on Draco’s calf.
In contrast with the warm sun, the cold metal shocked you as you realised that he was using Jane Austen to propose to you. Draco closed the book while keeping his thumb in between the pages as to not lose your place. He looked down at you with a smile that rivalled even the sun.
“My mother is going to make me propose in front of your parents during Christmas dinner,” he admitted as you rose into a sitting position and twisted to face him, immediately making and maintaining eye contact. “I wish we could wait, that we could have more time but, I have fallen too hard for you to allow anyone to force me to propose to you, you don’t deserve it in the least, and this is a moment that our parents shouldn’t be allowed to control.”
You placed the ring between his thumb and forefinger of his right hand and then guided it onto your ring finger on your left hand. “‘Elizabeth, feeling all the more than common awkwardness and anxiety of his situation, now forced herself to speak; and immediately, though not very fluently, gave him to understand that her sentiments had undergone so material a change, since the period to which he alluded, as to make her receive with gratitude and pleasure his present assurances.’” You quoted the passage from memory in response to Draco, and as a way to say yes to his proposal. “Thank you, Draco, and I want you to know that if the situation had been different, I still would have said yes.”
Despite his bright smile, a tear slipped from the platinum-haired boy’s eye, startling you. You really hadn’t ever expected to see Draco Malfoy cry, even a solitary tear.
“Draco, dear, what’s wrong?” you asked as you wiped the tear away with your thumb, leaving your hand to rest on his cheek.
“Y/n, you’re being forced to marry someone who could get you killed,” he said, his voice lowering and becoming melancholy.
You sat up and turned to face him, taking his hands in yours, “It’s the opposite, you’re the one saving me from my parents. I don’t know what you mean,” you said, concerned at his sudden change in demeanour.
“He knows, he knows that I love you, and he’ll kill you if I don’t do what he’s asked me to do,” Draco said, his eyes cast down.
“Who, Draco?”
“Voldemort,” Draco whispered, barely audible. “He’s demanded that I kill Dumbledore by the end of the year in order to make up for my father’s mistakes at the ministry,” he admitted. “And if I don’t do it, he’ll kill you.”
Your eyes widened in shock as you processed what Draco told you, all of Harry’s theories finally making sense. Even more so, all of Draco’s nerves and mood swings over the year finally coming to light, why he had been so hesitant to admit his feelings for you, his possessive nature finally making sense.
“Y/n, you’re so good, such a good person,” he said as another tear slid down his cheek. “You are so much braver than I am. You were able to denounce all of this while I let them turn me into one of them.” You felt the pain in his voice resonate in your chest. “While I terrorised you and your friends, and even now as I plan to murder our headmaster, you continue to find a way to show me more kindness and love than I have ever experienced.”
“Draco, I love you, and you’re wrong. You aren’t them,” you whispered as you gestured to the manor. “If you were, you would have left me to bleed under my father’s boot. You wouldn’t have tried to protect me from him,” you said as you placed your hand on his shoulder. “I know that what you’re doing comes not from a place of evil but from necessity and that all will be right in the end because we will find a way to come out on the right side of the war. I promise that as long as we have one another, things will be okay.” You promised with all sincerity. “Now, the sun is setting, and it’s about to get frigid out here. I say we head back up to your room, and I finish reading Pride and Prejudice to you.”
“I thought that was my job,” he said, the smile slowly returning to his face.
“Well, I think that it is fair of me to want to cheer up my fiancé,” you said, matching his smile.
“Admittedly, I’ve wanted to hear your Mr. Darcy interpretation,” he teased.
“I don’t think it’ll be half as good as yours,” you admitted, glancing down at the ring on your finger, which wasn’t a symbol of the life you were losing but the love you were gaining. “Thank you for this, Draco.”
“Anything for you, my darling,” he said as he reached a hand out to you, which he used to pull you up to your feet and into a kiss in which you melted into Draco. His lips were still warm from the sun and so soft on yours. When he pulled away, you sighed from the loss of touch, yet also in satisfaction.
You collected the remnants of the picnic, along with the book, which suddenly held so much more value in your eyes, and you followed Draco out of the maze and back to the Manor. You were so engrossed in your thoughts and in Draco that you completely forgot about the other residents of the mansion. Although, you were swiftly reminded as when you entered through the large, French style, doors you were affronted by a stoic-faced Narcissa occupying the centre of the room, clearly anticipating your return.
“Good evening, Narcissa,” you greeted warmly.
“Good evening,” she returned coldly. “Glad to see that your leg is better,” she said despite the terrible red scar that now obviously occupied your cheek. “Since tomorrow is Christmas, and essentially our final day together, I have the day planned to the minute. Throughout the morning, we shall be finalizing wedding plans, which require both of your thoughts. Then Draco, you will have time to complete your errand before you return to get ready for Christmas dinner with the Y/l/n’s. Sunday, the two of you will pack and prepare for your return to Hogwarts. We start our day at precisely eight.”
“We will see you at the dining table at eight then,” Draco matched her tone, clearly unfazed by his mother’s sudden coldness, which had uniquely caught you by surprise. This was a side of the woman you hadn’t seen yet.
“Good night, Narcissa,” you said, trying to push aside your shock as Draco pulled you out of the entryway and upstairs to his room.
When you made it inside, Draco closed the door behind you and looked you dead in the eyes, “tomorrow, you don’t get a second of alone time with them. No matter what, I’m by your side.”
“You don’t have to convince me,” you smiled grimly, and he sighed in relief. “Now, lay down, dear. We have a book to finish.”
The two of you cuddled up into one another’s side as you finished reading the book aloud. To your satisfaction, just as you finished the book, Draco started prompting you to softly run your hands through his perfect platinum blonde hair, which in the days without styling or care had begun to curl into soft waves. At some point, you fell asleep with the light still on and your precious copy of Pride and Prejudice open on your lap. Yet, you slept that night without a nightmare or a negative thought, your mind and body entirely at peace wrapped up in Draco’s arms.
You awoke to bright morning light flooding into the room, which startled you as you still felt Draco by your side. You slowly drew yourself up and looked over to see Alexis, your wedding planner standing by your bed, assuming it had been her who had opened the curtains.
“Alexis?” You asked groggily, confused by her presence in your fiancé’s room. “Why aren’t you home? It’s Christmas.”
“Lady Malfoy asked me here,” she said. “She also asked me to retrieve you, miss, as well as Master Malfoy.”
You nodded, “we’ll get dressed and be down shortly.”
She responded with a bow of her head, then she swept out of the room, closing the door fast behind her.
“What in the world was that about?” Draco groaned, eyes still closed.
“Your mother sent the bloody wedding planner up here to wake us,” you said, in complete disbelief of Narcissa’s decision to do so.
“Mm-alright,” he said as he sat up, kissing you on the cheek before sliding out of bed.
“I’m going to slip into my room and grab a dress,” you said as you stretched out your arms before standing.
“Alright, darling,” Draco said as he disappeared into his closet to get dressed himself.
The two of you got ready relatively quickly, donning appropriately formal clothing and descended downstairs and into the dining room together, where Narcissa and Alexis were already talking, papers, linen samples, and photographs spread out amongst tea, fruits, and other miscellaneous breakfast items.
“Good morning,” you greeted as a polite way to announce your arrival.
“Oh, good, we’ve been waiting for you two,” Narcissa said, looking up as you entered the dining room. “Sit, we have a lot to get through.” While she wasn’t as cold as she was last night, she wasn’t the same kind motherly woman who had offered you her dress for your wedding.
You and Draco assumed seats next to each other as Narcissa occupied the head of the table and Alexis sat across from you. Immediately, you were bombarded with questions, confirmations that Draco liked the choices you had made last week, ornate changes Narcissa recommended, and series more decisions you had never considered went into wedding planning. Occasionally, you would lean over to Draco and whisper some joke or terrible comment into his ear, and he would have to stifle his laughter which inherently bothered both Alexis and Narcissa as they were suddenly convinced that neither of you was taking this seriously. As afternoon approached Narcissa dismissed Draco, much to your dismay you were left alone with the two women who buckled down on you the second he was gone.
Eventually, Narcissa dismissed you and Alexis, allowing you to go and change and for Alexis to finally make her way home. Although, you were convinced that she didn’t care about that, instead sticking to her oh-so-important schedule. You made your way up to your room, Draco nowhere to be seen, you slipped into your room where you found the black gown your mother had packed for this exact occasion; it even had a note on it that read, ‘wear for Christmas dinner.’ Not in any particular mood to disobey, you donned the dress. While it did not come with a corset, it was quite tight and held your core in as if it were one. After dressing, you sat in front of the vanity to don the face that would get you through the night. Despite the time you took on your hair and makeup, hoping you would waste enough time so Draco would be ready and you wouldn’t have to face whatever was downstairs alone. However, when you made your way down, you found both the entrance hall and the few sitting rooms to be empty, leaving you to admire the decorations that had gone up in the last hour you had been spending getting ready. Classical music was drifting through the first floor, and the decorations which were already there had been accompanied by more lavish ornaments circled throughout the space, which was almost entirely lit by warm candle-light. Had the manor not been another prison for you, you may have some capacity for admiration of its beauty.
“Oh, well, hello there,” you heard the sharp and twisted voice you hadn’t heard since the battle in the Department of Mysteries.
In response, you shot around to see Draco standing next to his Aunt Bellatrix Lestrange as they were standing in the entryway before you. “Lady Lestrange,” you said, bowing your head respectfully.
“Draco, this is the girl?” she asked her nephew as she crept towards you.
“Yes, Aunt Bellatrix, this is her, Y/n Y/l/n,” he spoke formally.
“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you, ma’am. I’ve been told that you’re a great witch,” you said, your head still bowed. To say that Lestrange intimidated you was a grand understatement.
“Enough flattery, girl, it will get you nowhere,” she said as she circled you, inspecting you.
“Bella,” Narcissa greeted warmly as she descended the stairs into the hall.
“Cissy,” Bellatrix responded, turning away from you to greet her sister.
You used the opportunity to make your way to Draco’s side, Bellatrix’s appearance at the dinner, both shocking and nerve-racking. Having to deal with your parents was one thing; Bellatrix Lestrange was a whole other beast.
“Watch your mind,” Draco muttered in your ear as he snaked an arm around your waist, pulling you into his side. “She’s a powerful Occlmens.”
You nodded in response, watching as the sisters greeted each other. “How were your errands?” You asked.
“Fine, we can talk about them later.”
“What are we waiting for?” Bellatrix asked her sister, clearly unaware of the plans for the evening.
“The Y/l/n’s, Y/n’s parents are set to arrive in a matter of moments,” Narcissa said. “Then it will just be the six of us, an intimate affair.”
Perfect timing as always, your parents popped into the room through the grand fireplace, green smoke billowing around their feet.
“Hello, Narcissa, Bellatrix,” your father greeted the two witches. “Happy Christmas.”
“Yes, Happy Christmas, William,” Narcissa greeted, her warmth and kindness suddenly flooding back.
“Bellatrix, oh, I haven’t seen you since the summer. How have you been?” Your mother greeted.
“I have been quite well, Layah,” Bellatrix said, a note of sadism to her voice. “Lovely to see you both.”
“Let us make our way to the sitting room. I know we have quite a bit to discuss,” Narcissa said as she eyed Draco, likely referring to the proposal he was meant to make.
Everyone followed Narcissa into the sitting room, sifting out to where they were meant to sit. You and Draco on a loveseat near the Christmas tree, Bellatrix and Narcissa sitting on armchairs adjacent to one another, and your mother and father on a couch together. As you all situated yourselves flutes of champagne appeared at everyone’s side.
“Now, Narcissa I know you said that we weren’t focusing on gifts,” your father spoke up. “But I was thinking, and since Draco is to be my son-in-law, I thought it would be appropriate for me to give him this.” William rose and crossed over to where the two of you were sitting to hand Draco a long, elegantly wrapped, box.
“Thank you, sir,” Draco said, accepting the box.
“Go ahead and open it,” your father said jovially as he returned to his seat.
Draco split the wrapping along the seam, leaving a black jewellery box, opening it he revealed a silver wizard’s watch, the one your father had given to William for his seventeenth birthday. You swallowed your shock, refusing to show the pain that echoed in your heart on your face. Yet, you weren’t surprised at your father using Draco as a replacement for what he killed.
“Thank you, sir. It’ll be an honour to wear this.”
William beamed, twisting his face into a nasty smile, “I’m glad you think so, boy.”
“How kind of you, William,” Narcissa piped.
“Actually,” you chimed in. “While Draco and I were out last week, I picked this up for you. It’s small, but I thought it’d be nice for you to have them for the wedding.” You made your way across the room to hand Narcissa the impeccably wrapped, tiffany blue box. “And Draco got something for you as well, mother,” you said, then walking to her to hand her the black velvet jewellery box.
“Darling, you didn’t have to do this,” Narcissa smiled kindly as she opened the box.
You returned to your spot next to Draco, taking his hand in yours.
Narcissa pulled out the drop pearl earrings, the smile remaining on her face. “Y/n, this is so sweet, thank you.”
“I’m so glad you like them,” you said, returning her smile.
Layah opened her gift, revealing a fine diamond and emerald decorated bracelet that fit into her jewellery collection well. “Draco, this was quite thoughtful of you,” she said, her lack of gratitude bothering you.
“You’re welcome, ma’am,” he said, nodding his head.
“Well, this is quite boring, isn’t it?” Bellatrix chimed in. “It’s a bit of a drag.”
“Is that because no one got you a gift, ma’am?” you asked sarcastically, quickly taking on the ‘ma’am’ as you noticed the gravity of you using such humour in that room.
Silence fell upon everyone in the room, and you could feel your parents sharp glare fall upon you instructing you that you had made a-
A shrill laugh erupted from Bellatrix’s throat, interrupting the concern that fell upon your shoulders, “Oh, maybe I underestimated you, seems you’re not so boring after all,” she said, then continued to giggle, causing Narcissa and your parents to join in with uncomfortable chuckles and false smiles.
“I’m glad you think so,” Draco said, standing up from his spot next to you. “If no one minds I would like to steal this moment to do something quite important.” Once he received looks or nods of recognition Draco turned to face you, bending down onto one knee, he looked up at you and knowing that only you could see his face he shared a bright, kind smile you had only seen when the two of you had been alone. “Y/n Y/m/n Y/l/n, throughout our years of knowing each other, growing up with one another, attending school together I only ever imagined a life with you. When my mother informed me of our arrangement I was overcome with delight at the prospect of joining hands with another great Wizarding family,” You were not surprised by the loveless and prideful nature of the proposal, this was not for you, it was for your father and for his mother. Draco pulled out a ring, something dark, ornate, and clearly ancient. “Now, it is with great admiration for you and your family that I ask you to be my wife,” he said, looking up at you expectedly.
“It would be my honour to uphold the noble name of Malfoy, and therefore the name of Y/l/n, through becoming your wife,” you said, the acceptance taught to you, forced down your throat, word for word by your mother. While you accepted, Draco slipped the engagement ring onto your bare ring finger, the one he had given you yesterday residing on the opposite hand for the time being. As he did so light, polite applause filled the room.
“The two of you do make a handsome couple,” Narcissa smiled, and you couldn’t tell whether or not the curving of her lips was genuine.
“Absolutely,” your mother hissed. “Draco, we are pleased to be inviting you into the family.”
Accolades for Draco, for you, and for the two of you as a couple continued on until dinner was announced. Dinner itself droned on for hours, and drinks afterwards droned on for hours, you felt as if you were a puddle by the time the evening was over. As usual, you spent most of the night silently observing those around you, although Bellatrix would occasionally drag you into conversation in an attempt to read you. The dinner was like the lunch before and the dinner before that, and every, single, individual, societal event you had attended in your life. You yearned to return to Draco’s room fall into his arms and shed the night, the terrible forced proposal, and the stank of society from your shoulders. Eventually and thankfully you did, both of you quick to wish ‘Happy Christmas’ and ‘Goodnight’ to your parents as well as his mother and aunt. Then, of course, swiftly retreating to Draco’s bedroom. Both of you exhausted trading the confining clothing you wore throughout the evening for sweaters and pyjama pants, then collapsing onto the mattress and into one another’s arms.
The next morning you awoke first to find Draco’s arm draped over your torso, and his face nuzzled into your neck. You smiled, happy to see him so peaceful, and terribly sad that you would have to disturb that peace. You slowly started running your hands through his wavy platinum blonde hair, taking in how handsome he looked as he slept.
“Merlin, it’s Sunday, isn’t it?” Draco asked.
“Yes, darling, it is.”
Draco emitted a pained groan and curled his arms around you to pull you tightly into him, “that means I won’t get to hold you like this ‘till June.”
You giggled at his pain, “I’m sure we will find a way, Draco.”
“You know, this is the worst thing about you being a Gryffindor,” he said with distaste. “If you were a Slytherin we wouldn’t have this issue.”
A pleasant smile rested on your face, “Draco, we wouldn’t have this issue if you were a Gryffindor,” you countered.
“As if, Y/n,” he scoffed, you laughed again, and Draco was sure that your laugh could rival the brightness of the sun. He drew away from only for a second so that he could kiss you and experience that brightness for himself. The kiss lasted for a blissful moment before he pulled away to take you in for just a moment.
“You’re beautiful, Y/n,” he said, brushing a piece of hair out of your face.
You smiled up at him, “you’re too nice, Draco.”
“I am the complete opposite,” he countered and your smile widened.
“Come now, we have to get you packed,” you said, gesturing to his closet.
“Y/n, that sounds miserable,” he lamented.
“Darling, as badly as I want to lay in bed with you all day, I also wish to return to school.”
“Fine,” he said, dramatic as ever. “But only because I love you.”
“Thank you,” you said as you planted a swift kiss on his cheek before rolling out of the bed.
It didn’t take you long to get your things together since you didn’t bring much and because most of your things were staying at the Manor considering you were essentially moving in. When you finished, you helped Draco pack his things up, and you were sure to include some of his sweaters which you had come to love so much. After you were both done, you made your way downstairs where Narcissa was waiting.
You stood in front of the fireplace, excited to finally be leaving the terribly dark home. “Narcissa thank you again for having me. I am truly excited to return for summer,” you lied through your teeth, doing your best to make the statement as believable as possible. At the end of the term, you would go to your home for a day in order to pack up whatever you wanted to bring along with you to your new life. From then on you would reside at Malfoy Manor, at the very least until the end of the war, then it would be expected for you and Draco to live alone until Lucius handed the Manor over to his son. Unless of course, the war turned against Voldemort’s favour.
“Y/n, it was lovely getting to know you. I am incredibly excited for the wedding,” she responded and you smiled.
“So am I ma’am, and thank you for including me in so much of the planning.”
Narcissa nodded, a tight smile on her lips.
“Well, you two have a good semester, and Draco, please write,” she said as she brushed her son’s shoulder as many mother’s do.
“Of course, mother,” he said before turning to you. “Y/n, would you like to go first?”
You nodded, “thank you again, Narcissa.” And with that, you stepped into the fireplace with floo powder in hand, “Hogwarts!” You shouted clearly, disappearing in a green cloud with Draco not far behind.
To your surprise, you found yourself in Professor McGonagall’s office. You quickly became aware of your surroundings, and dusted the powder off of your jeans before stepping out of her fireplace and onto her carpet. “Hello Professor, I hope you had a happy holiday.”
“Thank you, Miss. Y/l/n, it was nice, quiet without Mr. Potter around to stir the pot,” she said as she looked up, a warm smile on her face.
“Well he is known for that, isn’t he,” you conceded, knowing you were often a part of the trouble.
“Dear, Y/n, your face, what happened?” McGonagall’s face twisting into concern as she noticed the still fresh raised red scar reaching across your face.
“Oh,” you raised a hand to touch the scar, having forgotten to come up with an excuse for the visibly wound. “Just a freak cooking accident, it seems I-I manage just as much trouble when I’m home as when I’m here,” you said, adding a fake laugh to try and convince her that all was fine, although you were sure she could read right through you.
“Y/n, if you need anything,” she said, her eyes falling on the engagement ring on your finger. “Please feel free to speak to me.”
“Thank you, Professor, I’m going to go unpack now,” you said, wanting desperately to get out of the awkward situation.
“Of course,” she said. “I’ll see you in class Tuesday.”
You nodded, and swiftly left her office, making your way to the Gryffindor common room in the hopes of finding Harry, Ron, and Hermione, knowing you had a lot to explain. When you got to the common room, you were disappointed to discover that you were the first to arrive. You sufficed yourself to grabbing some food in the Great Hall, figuring if anyone was looking for you that would be an easy place to find you. However, your journey downstairs was swiftly interrupted.
“Y/N!” You heard Harry’s voice, and you turned around, excited to see your friend.
“Bloody hell, Y/n, what happened to your face?” Ron asked as you turned to face them.
“Seriously, Ronald?” Ginny scolded her brother.
“No, it’s fine, it was just my father,” you explained. The three of them knew plenty about your parent’s abuse.
“Merlin, he’s never-” Harry started, but you cut him off.
“I know, I’d really rather not get into it, it’s not like it’s a happy memory.”
“Yeah, of course,” he said, scratching the back of his head, unsure of what to say.
“Holy shit! Y/n is that an engagement ring?!” Ginny exclaimed, rushing over to you and grabbing your left hand to examine your ring finger.
“Why don’t we go to the common room and we’ll talk about the holiday there,” you said firmly, uncomfortable having this conversation in the middle of a hallway.
“That's probably a good idea,” Harry said, and the four of you made your way back towards the common room, and for extra precaution, you went up to the boy’s dorm which was empty, and thankfully didn’t smell as it often did since the boys hadn’t had the opportunity to stink it up just yet.
“So, how was Malfoy Manor?” Ginny asked teasingly as you all found places to sit around the room, you and Ginny taking Harry’s bed; mutually refusing to trust Ron’s.
“Well to make a long story short, the scar was caused by my father finding our letters, and according to tradition, Draco had to propose to me with our families present, and with his family ring. So, they had him propose last night,” you explained. “Malfoy Manor is a terrifying place, but I have been before,” you thought, and you knew you couldn’t just say that Draco was assigned by Voldemort to murder Dumbledore which is why he had been acting so weird, but you weren’t sure otherwise how to explain to your friends why Draco acts the way he does, and that he really is a good guy.
“What did Malfoy tell your dad about the letters?” Ron scoffed.
“No, of course, he didn’t,” you bit. “My father just spies on me. Draco is actually the reason my father didn’t end up killing me, and he really isn’t such a bad guy.”
“I’m sorry, but there is no way we are talking about the same guy who terrorised us at dinner and announced to the entire school that you were snogging Harry just a few weeks ago,” Ginny countered, and Harry’s face turned beet red.
“We’re talking about Malfoy, I presume?” Hermione asked as she entered the room.
“Hermione!” you greeted her warmly, excited to see her.
“Hello everyone,” she said as she assumed a seat near you. “So, what did I miss?”
Ginny quickly summarised the conversation thus-far, "And I don’t trust Malfoy in the least,” she said, shooting you an irritated look.
“Well I do, and considering it is my life I have no control over, I think that I get to at least decide whether or not I trust him. Anyways he’s proved himself over the holiday, and that’s all that matters, eh?”
“I still think you’re marrying a Death-Eater,” Harry said, confident in his accusation, which you of course knew was correct.
“And what if I am?” you asked. “Harry I am also the child of Death-Eater’s. Not only that, but my parents made it very clear that if I don’t marry him, I’m dead. And wouldn't you rather, when this war happens you have someone on the inside with your interest at heart? Harry I would rather die fighting for a cause than fighting myself.”
Everyone paused for a moment, it was oftentimes easy to forget the gravity of the situation you were all in, but your words made your friends conscious of everything for a moment.
“You all know where I stand,” you said, your eyes were watering, but your voice was firm. “And I intend on fighting with you; I just won’t be able to do so by your side. I assume you already knew that.”
“We just always hoped it would somehow turn out differently, Y/n,” Hermione said honestly. “But of course we understand.”
“Then you’ll also understand that this is likely my last term at Hogwarts,” you said, your voice lower this time.
“Yes,” Harry said quietly.
“So you’ll understand why I want this conversation to end and why I just want to spend time with my friends?” You asked as a tear dripped down your cheek.
Ginny wrapped you in a hug, Hermione quickly joining in, and you wiped the tear from your face. “We love you,” Ginny muttered, and you squeezed her tightly in response.
“What are you two doing over there?” Hermione chided Ron and Harry, ignoring her own tears. “Get over here and join the bloody hug!”
The boys both shook their heads, trying their best to push back their own emotions and joining the three of you in the hug which was quickly turning into a dog pile.
“Anyways, Draco is on our side,” you breathed.
-
Part 7 - Coming Soon
Tags!
Everything - @sarcasticallywitty15 @fred-love-bot
Silver Letter - @hidejeon @Ravenclawgurl137 @unexpectedly-slytherin @missmercurymoon @herequeerandstressed @lordfxxker@pillowjj@pointlesscoconut @lovelylangdonx @fire-in-her-veinz @morelovemorepeacemoretattoo-blog @oi-itsemily@lukehemmingslut831 @peachybeannn @lovebynorth@bubblesam06@voidnarnia @bethii1 @arthemis-o-negative@roseyrams@treestarrrrrrrr @streetfighterrichie @dreams-in-blxck @psychramt @dracofeltonmalfoy @weasleydream @rottenhexrt@daringvixon @thatguppienamedbae @lord-byron
#draco malfoy fanfiction#Draco Malfoy#draco x reader#draco malfoy x reader#draco fanfiction#harry potter fanfiction#the silver letter#red writes#arranged marriage fic#arranged marriage au
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Note
She hated how much she liked him now
Thank you sooo much for the prompt!!!
The “him” in the prompts are replaced with “her” since this is a fem!jily fic!!! I had too many ideas for this fic...maybe I’ll write some of the rest in the future, but here you go!
You can read it here or on ao3
THE CURLY SQUAD
(Tuesday 16:00)
Sirius Black: moony and the rest of you pay up
Marlene Mckinnon: why should we pay u?
Remus Lupin: u still owe me 20 btw so i dont think i will
Sirius Black: ofc ppl like u wouldnt know smh
jamie finally asked lily on a date
Peter Pettigrew: Wait what
Marlene McKinnon: afsjtksjdggehej
when
how
tell me everything
Sirius Black: well little prongsie finally sucked up and asked ickle lilykins on date
voila
Marlene McKinnon: give me the details black
or i s2g ill kick u out of the group
Sirius Black: empty threats
if u really wanna know u can go ask em
(Marlene McKinnon has removed Sirius Black from the group chat)
Peter Pettigrew: Remind me to not ever cross paths with Marlene
_____________
THE CURLY SQUAD
(Tuesday 17:00)
Jamie Potter: good riddance
thx marls
Marlene McKinnon: got u covered hon
now spill
Jamie Potter: i hv a date with lil on friday:)
Lily Evans: that she does;)
Marlene McKinnon: i demand details ppl
(Dorcas Meadows has removed Marlene McKinnon from the group chat)
Remus Lupin: wh did u do that for
Dorcas Meadowes: She was being too nosy
I didn't like it
Jamie Potter:.........thx??
Dorcas Meadowes: Welcome sweetie
_________
THE CURLY SQUAD
(Tuesday 17:34)
Mary Macdonald: wait what????!!!!!??!
__________
JILY LAMES TALK
(Wednesday 16:30)
Sirius Black: r v up for spying on them on fri?
Marlene Mckinnon: u kno it;)
Mary Macdonald: hell yeah
Peter Pettigrew: Yes! ofc
Remus Lupin: we should give them some privacy sirius
tho ik its a foreign concept to you
Dorcas Meadowes: Obviously
And of course I wanna spy on them
Remus Lupin: but still...yes
Sirius Black: ther is no privacy between frnds
YAAY
Marlene Mckinnon: so v meet up at 4 outside the bistro next to three broomsticks
Peter Pettigrew: Wait when’s their date and where?!??
Mary Macdonald: at 5 in 3 broomsticks pete cmon keep up
Remus Lupin: how did u know that?
Sirius Black: im her brother and both their best frnds its obvio that id be the first one to kno
Marlene Mckinnon: and im lilys best frnd too sirius
Dorcas Meadows: You spied on them didnt you?
Sirius Black: v hv all the rights to spy on them
Mary Macdonald: wait i thought that i was lilys best frnd
Dorcas Meadowes: I can confidently say that it’s neither of you
I’m her best friend
Sirius Black: prove it
Marlene Mckinnon: yeah!
Dorcas Meadowes: (sends an attachment)
Marlene Mckinnon: shit
Mary Macdonald: …...fair
___________
Private chat between Jamie Potter and Lily Evans
(Thursday 19:45)
Jamie Potter: cant wait for our date tomorrow
Lily Evans: ik u cant
Jamie Potter:
Lily Evans: <3
;)
______________
Private chat between Jamie Potter and Sirius Black
(Thursday 19:48)
Jamie Potter: sirius sirius sirius
lily just sent me a winky face emoticon!!!!
what do i do???!!!?!!!?!?!
(Message read at 19:49)
______________
Private chat between Jamie Potter and Lily Evans
(Thursday 19:51)
Jamie Potter: :D
_______________
Private chat between Jamie Potter and Lily Evans
(Friday 16:30)
Jamie Potter: u ready?
Lily Evans: yes !
wher r u
Jamie Potter: cool
just reached ur door
______________
JILY LAMES TALK
(Friday 16:30)
Sirius Black: where tf r u guys
its only me and marlene here
Mary Macdonald: just outta class
be there in 10
Remus Lupin: home
Peter Pettigrew: At the ice cream parlor for ice cream
Dorcas Meadows: Oh get me some too Pete?
Remus Lupin: me too pls pete
Mary Macdonald: oooh id like some too
mint chocolate chip for me pls
Peter Pettigrew: Sure thing! wh abt the rest of u??
Dorcas Meadowes : Strawberry! with a lot of strawberries as toppings!!!
Remus Lupin : devils choc ofc
Sirius Black : guys can v focus at the matter in hand??!!
also charcoal ice cream pls
just as black as my soul
Peter Pettigrew : ...k
U marls??
Marlene Mckinnon:..........vanilla. thx
____________
JILY LAMES TALK
(Friday 16:45)
Sirius Black: where tf r u guys?!!??!?
theyll b here any sec
Remus Lupin: sirius everyone is here
except for u and marlene
where tf r u guys?!!???
Marlene McKinnon: we r at the spirit store
where tf r u guys????
Sirius Black: i told u guys to meet us here
Dorcas Meadowes: Wtf is a spirit store?
Sirius Black: a store that sees our spirit
Peter Pettigrew: Ur ice creams starting to melt!!!!!!
Mary MacDonald: oh the halloween costume shop?
why?
Sirius Black: to dress up ofc
Marlene Mckinnon: honesty guys?
lily and jamie will recognise us if v go like this
and v cant afford that!!!!
Remus Lupin: that is smart….
didnt expect it from u both
Sirius Black: fuck you remus
fuck you
Dorcas Meadowes: So what are our disguises??
Marlene McKinnon: dog ears and nose
a gily suit
a moon suit
rat whiskers and ears
a tree hat and glasses
and a big floppy hat and sunglasses for my beautiful girlfriend
Dorcas Meadowes: ………….
Peter Pettigrew: Dorcas and remus took ur ice cream btw
Something about it melting, u being stupid and u not being here
Sirius Black: remy how could u
Marlene McKinnon: ffs dorcas
i thought u loved me
Peter Pettigrew: Who’s wearing what costume?
Remus Lupin: also sirius
do u really think that we can pull it off?
itd be tooo obvious
Mary Macdonald: nd theyll realise that we r spying on them
Sirius Black: they couldnt even realise that they had a crush on each other until i intervened
do you think that theyll realise that its us???????
Remus Lupin: …...point
Sirius Black: so im wearing the dog ears and nose
marls gonna wear the gily suit
the moon hat and the silver suit is for u remus
Marlene Mckinnon: the rat whiskers r for peter
and the tree hat and sunglasses r for mary :)
____________
JILY LAMES TALK
(Friday 16:55)
Sirius Black: ok now positions!
marlene mary and i r sitting in the booth behind the big fat hydrangea
nd remus peter nd dorcas r gonna sit 2 rows behind them in the corner table outside
Peter Pettigrew: How do u even know where the r gonna sit?????!!!!!???
Marlene Mckinnon: v bribed the receptionist obviously
Sirius Black: she will make sure that they sit second in the row between the hydrangeas and the window
Remus Lupin: how can v hear them if v r outside??
Marlene Mckinnon: oh hush remus
ever heard of privacy?
Remus Lupin: wtf do u think we r doing rn??!!?!??!?!!
Dorcas Meadowes: Making sure the date goes perfectly?
Sirius Black: thank u dorcas
Mary Macdonald: yeah!
exactly
Remus Lupin: …………
i give up
Peter Pettigrew: Just now?
Thought u gave up when Jamie successfully insulted Lily two yers back when in fact she was supposed to ask her out on a date :/
Sirius Black: that was a good laugh
___________
JILY LAMES TALK
(Friday 17:04)
Peter Pettigrew: Ok they’re sitting rn
Dorcas Meadowes: Don’t they look cute together
Remus Lupin: do i hv to wear this silvery rocky suit?!??!
Sirius Black: yes
and yes they look perfect
our ship is finally sailing
Dorcas Meadowes: Is is is Jamie stuffing a breadstick in her nose
Peter Pettigrew: No I think she’s trying to look like a walrus
Remus Lupin: she does not need to embarrass herself more
Mary Macdonald: u really think this is anything compared to the time when she tripped over her cat and fell on lilys bday cake?
Sirius Black: lolol
the bruise she left him with lasted for two weeks
Dorcas Meadowes: I stg that woman has the best boxing skills
Marlene Mckinnon: dorcas!!!! not me????
im ur girlfriend!!!
Mary Macdonald: lolololol
she thought that jamie did it on purpose for years lol
Marlene McKinnon: and why tf is lily doing the same
i thought she had more sense than that
Remus Lupin: love can do that to you ya know
Sirius Black: u would know
Marlene McKinnon: ohhh look jamie snorted the breadstick out of her mouth!!
neat
Mary Macdonald: lily did it too
Mary Macdonald: i think she has enough sense to not offend lily
Remus Lupin: ya think?
u want me to remind u about all the times she offended lily?
Peter Pettigrew: Yeah so much that she hated Jamie
Sirius Black: nah she didnt
if anything lily hates how much she likes her now
Marlene Mckinnon: do u think theyll order soup?
Sirius Black: yeah ig
jamie wants it to be all fancy
Marlene McKinnon: pls dont order tomato soup
Mary Macdonald: it awfully looked a lot like the waiter said no tomato soup
Peter Pettigrew: Really? Lily hates tomatoes why would Jamie order em
Thought she wouldn’t today
At least
Sirius Black: thank hell jamie didnt order the tomato one
Dorcas Meadowes: Remember when Jamie made marinara for Lily to impress her lol
Remus Lupin: that plan backfired soo bad
Marlene Mckinnon at least lilys prank to get back at her was awesome
Sirius Black: that was such a power move!!!
and including taylor’s song
shehgeueytoaknd
Remus Lupin: tho she coloured her cat the so called emerald green and not key lime green and v had to listen to her go on and on abt how lily knows her fav colour
Mary Macdonald: jamie continued to think that it meant that she knew it for three months
:/
Dorcas Meadowes: As if u didnt like it
Mary Macdonald: lol i did love it
Peter Pettigrew: They are bonkers
Dorcas Meadowes: Bonkers for each other
Sirius Black: lol
Dorcas Meadowes: Their soup’s here
Sirius Black: spinach soup???
ewww jamie
Peter Pettigrew: Ahh creamy mushroom soup for Lil ig
Awesome choice
Mary Macdonald: they really ought to try new things
smh
___________
JILY LAMES TALK
(Friday 17:16)
Remus Lupin: wh did u guys order?
we ordered a lasagna
Marlene Mckinnon:?uhh same
ohhh look
Peter Pettigrew: The waiter’s back with pasta for both of them YAY
Do you guys think that they realised that we are spying on them??
Marlene Mckinnon: nah they’re hopeless Pete so no
Sirius Black: thank hell that they r cute
Remus Lupin: lol
Dorcas Meadowes: 3 yrs ago I wouldnt have thought that they would be here together on a date
Mary Macdonald: hell they woulnt have even been here as friends
Remus Lupin: or come here with us
Marlene Mckinnon: lily didnt even kno that she is bi then
Dorcas Meadowes: Yeah
It was quite a rough time for her
Peter Pettigrew: Guyssss
I have a question
Dorcas Meadowes: Shoot Pete
Peter Pettigrew: Why is the group name curly squad?
I mean only Dorcas’s hair is curly I only gathered that much
Dorcas Meadowes: Lol no Pete
Sirius Black: LOLOLOL
Marlene Mckinnon: lolll
Dorcas Meadowes Ohk so
None of us here are just straight so we’re curly lol
Sirius Black: lil nd i r bi
u r ace
dorcas nd mary r pans
remus is gay
jamie is lesbian
Marlene Mckinnon: i am bi too
u already knew that but still
Sirius Black: so yeah thats why
Peter Pettigrew: Oh wow
Ok
Thanks guys
Sirius Black: np pete
Peter Pettigrew: Jamie just leaned over to brush the remnants of pasta from lilys lips!!!!!!!!
Mary Macdonald: thats soo cute they r perfect
Sirius Black: nauseating more like
Dorcas Meadowes: I’m just revelling in the fact that she didnt brush him off
Marlene Mckinnon: thats second year of uni lily
even first fits in the category
Peter Pettigrew: and she held her hand!!!!!
Bold
Sirius Black: is that…...snep
Remus Lupin: snep?????
Dorcas Meadowes: Where
Sirius Black: behind u guys
Remus Lupin: OHHHH FUCK
Mary Macdonald: do u think that he knows abt their date
Sirius Black: well jamie did post it on her insta so…….
Dorcas Meadowes: Oh shit
Peter Pettigrew: Shit alright
Marlene Mckinnon: hes coming over ig
Mary Macdonald: yup hes in
Sirius Black: WHYYYYYY MUST YOU DO THIS TO ME GOD
COULDNT YOU LET MY SHIP LIVE IN PEACE!!!!
Remus Lupin: well u know what they say abt cannons sinking a ship :/
Sirius Black: remus theodore lupin u dare say that jily lames is not cannon
Marlene Mckinnon: remus ralph lupin wtf
Dorcas Meadowes: Remy, how could you?
Peter Pettigrew: Why would you say that Remus?
Mary Macdonald: remus john lupin u take that back right this instant
oh we r playing call remus wrong names
sry I didnt realise
Remus Lupin: i am sry guys I ship jily as much as u do
Sirius Black: LAMES
Remus Lupin: but i had to lol
i think v should go stop him from disturbing them
Mary Macdonald: hes already headed their way
its too late
Marlene Mckinnon: i s2g i will punch snep today if he does anything to them
Sirius Black: ill tackle him
Marlene McKinnon: perfect
Mary Macdonald: v might blow our cover too
not that im worried abt that
tho they might not appreciate the sentiment
Sirius Black: v shld go
Dorcas Meadowes: I feel like they'll want to handle this themselves
But ok!
Mary Macdonald: ok he hates u and remus the most so dorcas and i should go first
Sirius Black: but im their best friend
Dorcas Meadowes: Too late they’re already talking
Sirius Black: NOOOOOO
Remus Lupin: ig he just mentioned siris name
Sirius Black: seems that way
if he says anything abt jamie or reg i will lose it
Dorcas Meadowes: I think he’s berating lily for being out with jamie….
Mary Macdonald: ofc what else does the greasy slime ball know
Sirius Black: ok im gonna go
Peter Pettigrew: How to grease your hair 101??
Sirius Black: lol yes
Marlene Mckinnon: is he
is he pointing over to us
Mary Macdonald:k they r looking at us
Peter Pettigrew: Did Lily just call ur name out, guys?
Dorcas Meadowes: Mary, make sure Marls and Sirius don’t do anything stupid
_________
“Sirius, no!” Remus shouted, as the boy in question marched over to Jamie’s and Lily’s table.
“Well, hello there snivellus. Looking positively greasy today aren’t we?” Sirius taunted.
“What are you doing here Black?” Snape sneered.
Sirius hummed before responding, “We just fancied a dinner here. What about you?”
“Looking for something to grease?” Marlene chimed.
“Marlene,” Lily warned.
“Thought I’d visit my friend Lily here. That’s all Black,” Snape answered.
“More like crash her date,” Dorcas muttered, as she joined the group around Lily and Jamie’s table with Remus, Mary, and Peter.
“I am not your friend Snape.” Lily stood up, accompanied by Jamie.
“Lily!” The greasy haired man faced her pleadingly, “I care about you a lot. That’s why I’m telling you to not date Potter! Thinking that you’re bi may well just be a phase that’ll go away, Lily. Moreover, she doesn’t really care about you! She just thinks that you are some sort of prize to be won.”
Jamie looked like she wanted to dislocate Snape’s jaw, her fists curled at her sides. But the warning glance Lily threw her, made her insides calm down
“You know nothing about me Snape,” Lily said, with gritted teeth. “Now go away before I dislocate your nose.” Sirius whistled in support.
“Lily, we’ve been best friends since we were ten. I know you, Lily. Please listen to me,”
“If you were my best friend you’d have supported me instead of behaving like an ignorant ass. Now please go away.”
“Lily, please.”
Barely a moment later, Lily’s fist connected with Snape’s nose. Blood leaked down his front, while the rest of the gang rushed to vocally support her.
“You’ll regret that Lily!” Snape glared threateningly.
Before long, Sirius had tackled Snape to the ground, and accidentally splattered the lasagna the waiter was bringing over to their table, on Snape’s head.
“I...“ Lily began.
“You can save your breath, Lils,” Sirius started, “he’s a harmless, entitled prick”
“Looks like you have a lot of grease to get rid of, Snep,” Marlene announced.
“And Snep, pro tip: the only shampoo that keeps the grease at bay is the Sleakeasy shampoo. You should try it out!” Jamie, ever so helpful, advised, and moved to position her hand behind Lily’s back.
“Sorry about that Sir, we’ll cover the charges for the ill-fated lasagna,” Sirius apologised to the waiter as he helped him up from the ground.
“Could you please get him out of this shop? He’s been troubling us, as you can see,” Dorcas asked, politely.
The waiter simply looked baffled. However, he nodded and successfully escorted Snape out of the restaurant.
“Now this is going to be quite the first date story to tell at the wedding.” Peter spoke up for the first time since they gathered at the table between the hydrangeas and the windows.
Jamie blushed and looked around, anywhere but at Lily, though her hand never left Lily’s back, while the redhead laughed at her.
“Well, since we’re all together, we can have dessert and you can continue spying on us while sitting at our table,” Lily said. “Nice ears you’ve got there, Sirius. Though I’d prefer Dorcas’s floppy hat.”
“Yeah! I personally love the whiskers, Pete. Seriously, Marlene? A gily suit? Inconspicuous much? And Remus, you have enough sense to stop them!” Jamie put on.
Remus just shrugged, his big crescent shaped moon hat toppling Mary’s tree hat downwards. “Sorry,” he said, bending to pick it up.
“Thanks,” she said, when he gave the hat to her, “why did we agree to wear these again?”
“So we would be incognito, Mary”
“And we were successful! These oblivious dorks didn’t even realise that it was us until old snivelly pointed it out,” Sirius stated.
“Also, we did have ice-cream before coming here, so you guys should continue, we’ll leave,” Dorcas said.
“Hey! We didn’t get to eat that ice-cream! You and Remus took it from us,” Marlene reprimanded.
“Yeah! So we’ll be staying here and you guys can shoo away,” Sirius included.
“Well in that case you can all leave and get yourselves ice cream while Lily and I can finally enjoy our date,” Jamie, now pushing Sirius, and shoo-ing the others to the doors, said.
“Say what you want Jamie, I am enjoying our date,” expressed Lily.
“You are?” Jamie turned around, completely forgetting the others in the room.
“Well, looks like they’re more nauseating and lame than before. Should we go?” Asked Marlene.
“Nah. Let’s just sit outside and spy on them through the window,” Sirius smirked.
#jily#james potter#lily evans#sirius black#remus lupin#wolfstar#fem!jily#fem!jily february#marlene mckinnon#dorcas meadowes#anti snape#I like writing it as snep#severus snape#mary macdonald#peter pettigrew#marauders#finally fixed it#Harry Potter#fanfiction#joy writes
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