#femininity isnt inherently good | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

wolfertinger · 3 months ago

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salem has incredibly narrow, self-serving, and ultimately harmful view of trans identity. and that hurts. its a gut punch to start peeling back the layers and seeing how his perspective wasnt as inclusive or affirming as i once thought. its just a filtered, idealized projection of what he wanted transness to be, rather than a reflection of the diverse experiences that actually exist.

the way salem treats trans men is particularly insidious because it mimics the same kind of rhetoric that TERFs use. this idea that medical transition is inherently bad, that testosterone makes people worse, and that trans men are just poor confused souls who are “ruled by dysphoria.” it strips trans men of their agency and reduces their experiences down to a harmful, patronizing narrative. the fact that he constantly talks about T in such a negative way, implying that it makes people angrier, less desirable, and somehow fundamentally worse, feeds directly into the kind of transphobic discourse that right-wingers and gender-critical types love to push.

whats frustrating is that this wouldnt even be as much of an issue if he were just honest about his artistic biases. if he just admitted, “hey, i like drawing feminine trans men and hyper-feminine trans women with exaggerated features because thats what I enjoy,” then fine. at least that’s transparent. but no, he frames his work as some kind of holy grail of trans representation while simultaneously reinforcing narrow, unrealistic, and deeply dysphoria-inducing depictions of trans bodies. thats where it becomes harmful.

because heres the thing. representation isnt just about drawing trans people. its about how theyre represented. all his trans women have the exact same hyper-sexualized features and all his trans men conveniently avoid the masculine changes that T brings. what hes actually doing is reinforcing an extremely limited (and frankly fetishized) version of transness. its not about making trans people feel seen. its about making him comfortable.

and that “collective trauma” nonsense? thats just another way of erasing trans mens experiences. trans men don’t exist as an extension of womanhood, and they dont need to embrace femininity to be happy. the idea that all trans mens dysphoria is just “internalized misogyny” is literally regurgitated TERF ideology. its the same argument used to invalidate trans existence altogether.

it makes total sense why his work started making people uncomfortable. sometimes that discomfort is your gut recognizing something’s off before your brain fully processes it. we saw what felt like representation, but over time, the patterns became impossible to ignore. and when you realize that someone you once found comfort in actually harbors some really harmful and regressive views, it leaves you feeling betrayed.

the frustration is 100% justified. and honestly, its a good thing that people critically analyzing the media they consume. not all representation is good representation. if someone’s version of “trans visibility” only uplifts one kind of transness while subtly shaming and erasing the rest, then they arent actually advocating for trans people. theyre just indulging their own preferences under the guise of activism. and thats exactly what salem is doing.

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soracities · 2 years ago

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Oh this femininity convo is superb. I myself have recently started just being myself shamelessly, including wearing what i want without thinking will people like this or react badly or will people be disinterested in me etc I think it can be a big part of how we represent who we are to the world yknow 🤔 like i love long skirts and dresses to death (with pockets especially omg), i hate makeup (for mostly sensory reasons), i dont like shaving my pits even tho ive been told i should many times, i like boots and sneakers but also heels. I love cute delicate and feminine things but also functional and comfortable clothes. my outfits are kinda strange to look at i guess since they dont fit into any niche or aesthetic or even streotypical femininity but are rather an amalgamation of things i like that i think go nicely together and idk if i could even label it. Bc yeah i am a woman who likes feminine things but im a human being, and human beings are extremely complex and have several layers that dont fit into niches or aesthetics or boy girl categories (i also kind of hate aesthetics and how out of control its become everyone thinks they need to fit some aesthetic or category or group to be an acceptable person but yknow let's not even get into that rn bc lol thats a whole conversation by itself)

Point is we all care waaay too much what other people think and we try to fit ourselves into boxes to be acceptable and loved which is fair ig bc who doesnt want to be accepted at the end of the day, but putting on this show is so harmful to us and yet we still insist on the diets and the plastic surgery and shaming others or hating whats different. This isnt a new conversion its thousands of years old, yet we only seem to be going in circles :/

Oh anon I absolutely absolutely LOVE this for you, truly💕 I could not agree more and I think the one thing that really gets on my nerves about this whole thing is the way it is erasing all the multi-faceted dimensions that are inherent to being a human being in the first place--and that is such a deeply insidious and slippery slope to me.

I think the fact that this conversation is so old just shows how deeply important community and belonging is to us--and in a way I think it's a good thing that we are still having it because each and every time we get to improve a little; it means something, in my book at least, that even if we haven't fully succeeded in resolving it we are able, each time we talk about these things, to open a realm of possibility for someone, somewhere. And that's so important 🤍

#also dont get me started on aesthetics i absolutel despiseeeeee what they've become through social media & its Brand Management ethos #i do not need to categorise & package & present every random thing i like sometimes I Just Think Its Neat and we should leave it there ty #ask #anonymous

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snaxle · 1 year ago

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thank you for saying the truth about man hating ideology.

hating men isn't woke, and the only ones who'll care about it are the trans men you're going to hurt, idiots.

something also i think a lot of people seem to forget is that terf man hating rhetoric effects more than just men as well, and pretty much anyone can be negatively affected by it. which is why i think it's so dangerous when people confidently go around talking about how they think all men are gross and yucky while also supporting and/or being trans themselves. it's a bad mindset that unfortunately a lot of people fall into.

like im bigender, trans and a woman. pretty much all my life ive been negatively told by people that there's something wrong with me for dressing masculine, etc. one time i shaved all my hair off in support of a cancer charity and was bullied for looking too much like a boy, and that negatively affected my mindset for years and to this day im scared of having my hair shorter than my shoulders. i am not a man, nor do i consider myself a man but because other people perceived me as one they treated me like shit and it hurt a lot to know i was being treated differently than my peers solely for the reason that "ew boys/masculinity gross". (also. i dont even dress that "masculine". i literally just wear jeans and graphic t shirts and i guess that's Manly for people). there's other "ew gross you're a man😬" things ive encountered personally despite the fact that I Am Not A Man, which i won't get into because then i'll probably have to then talk about racism and how some white people perceive anyone who isnt white as inherently masculine, especially if they don't adhere to stereotypical feminine behaviour and appearances, but i can't be bothered to get into that right now.

this was not a good answer lmao sorry i had to get stuff off my chest

#asks #nyxofthedead

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sexysilverstrider · 4 months ago

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my prediction for pokemon masters ex is by next month, that fairy team star brat uhhh (googles name) ortega will be out. aoi and/or haruto will come out next year possibly february (since pokemon presents will happen at that time too). honest to god idk when hassel will come out. maybe he'll be with the paldean protags as well. idk

but what i WANT to know is kierans appearance in masters. of course he cant possibly come in yet before the protags. and if we were to compare his fame to the swsh dlc characters, he got famous instantly the second the teal mask dlc is out.

and why wouldnt he? he was the first character whose arc got bastardized by protags actions. he was the good turned bad rival. his whole story is his obsession with ogerpon which then evolves into obsession into getting stronger to beat protag. literally no brainwashing whatsoever. we were told that our actions caused him his downfall.

but even in during those moments, he was implied to like protag. the festival date? him giving a candy apple? thats just a standard shoujo scene. and him feeling betrayed by protag? protag apologizing and feeling guilty as fuck but he was too hurt to forgive?

that scene with terapagos? him being saved by protag. him being guilty but then steeled himself before fighting with protag side by side? he was just written in a way thats meant for me.

and the fact that he traded an applin with protag. thats just written in a way thats meant for the me part 2

and how protag answers arvens question about their relationship with kieran? 'he's just a....friend' girl what does that mean

kieran was written so specifically romantic. he was the closest to any romantic implication since Ns 'i like you a little' dialogue.

he got number 4 in the top 100 dream girls poll. he literally swept the majority of most famous male characters who have been in that poll for so long and he just got number 4 at first try. he apparently also got first place in one of the pokemon paldea polls?

kieran got A LOT of merch. hes a nui. he has 3 full art SAR cards. he has a figurine form. he has that cute interchangeable pouch. i think hes one of the male characters who got the most spotlight??? the last time any male character got this spotlight fast was N and N is still relevant to this day.

and what i notice about pokemon masters is they like to cast A-star seiyuus for their characters. they credit the voice actors (which i love) but its inherently funny for me that characters who are famous will get a really strong seiyuu lineup (N, steven, calem, cynthia, serena, silver HEHE, green, hikari). even piers was given to a very famous rockstar in japan??? and larry and kabu were given by Legends

the fact that hosoya yoshimasa got volo is the funniest shit ever. no one expected that. like we know he might get an A-star seiyuu but we were thinking someone like ishida akira or hirakawai daisuke. someone with a sweet charming almost feminine but still trickster-like voice. but no we got a deep sexy smooth voice. not complaining <3

volo was introduced coz he is now involved in the arceus arc as the main villain. honest to God idk when kieran will show up but i doubt itll be 2 years from now when a new arc is introduced. maybe he'll show up a few months after the protags are in the game.

his seiyuu will be someone famous and well-known. the pokemon company isnt blind to his fame and the amount of merch he has is proof. tpc and dena Will assign someone well-known to voice kieran who. as of now. has NO voice whatsoever in any media.

maybe its kakihara tetsuya (tho i bet his voice fits ortega more). maybe its shunichi toki. maybe its amasaki kouhei. maybe its one of the legends like kishio daisuke.

i hope its kaji yuki. by GOD i hope its kaji yuki. idc if kaji yuki got cilan but that green-haired grass gym boy has been in npc jail for 2 years and thats before kieran was released and no one knew how much of an impact he'll make please let kieran be voiced by kaji yuki

#tldr i just want kieran to be voiced by kaji yuki #YES VERONICA I KNOW THIS IS THE 70TH TIME IM SAYING THIS #AND ILL SAY IT AGAIN #i mean come on.........looking at kieran....thats THE most kaji yuki character #come on....COME ON....#fafar yaps #about pokemon

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psychewritesbs · 1 year ago

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hi! i didnt have much success when looking through ur blog to see if uve addressed this alrdy so apologies if u have.

i was curious to know ur thoughts on jjk's portrayals of gender, esp women/femininity. if u have particular insight from a psych or philosophy bg, id be interested in hearing that (warning, i have a v feminist critique lens)

ik u love gege's writing 😅 but his handle on female characters/femininity has given me such a difficult relationship w jjk, and its v difficult to have discourse on it. on one hand, we're introduced to sm interesting realistic women, tbh i actually never stanned a woman in manga before jjk. but imo it cant be denied that gege is a sexist writer. despite how realistic jjk women r theyre all .. halfwritten? i cant think of a single one who isnt underwritten, not fully explored, not utilized substantially in the plot, etc. and there r sm ex's of extremely minor male characters in jjk who r given more thematic relevance than frequently recurring women that just underscores that gender gap imo

this isnt solely a gege problem ik but what bothers me in particular about jjk vs other mangas is how gege addresses strength, even in the light of nb/androgynous characters, and how it feels as if gege's def of strength is inherently masculine? even despite going so far as to give us a philosophical battle shonen w diverse reps of gender and emphasizing individuality that encompasses both femme/masc traits

how a reader interprets whether a jjk woman is strong or not is obv subjective. like, i think shoko is strong but shes not depicted as such bc she doesnt have a combative technique whereas yuki maki nobara or mei r depicted as "strong" bc of their battle abilities. but it also feels as if those women r strong bc they take on "masculine" traits/mindsets whereas there r no clear depictions of "femininity" making women or men stronger. even utahime who falls into v classic shoujo girl tropes is seen as weak despite teaching her students v proficientally in battle strategy (mechamaru v mahito is a good ex of that imo), as compared to how gojo teaches his (ie dumping them into missions for experience). but thats not what gege ever chooses to highlight

femininity also doesnt even seem to make men/nb characters stronger. the ex's i can think of r naoya as a vagina (lmao), geto as a mother to curses, yuta as highly attuned to his emotions, kenjaku as yuji's mother -- those r things that support these (mostly) men's strong sense of individuality but like, those arent really the things that lend those characters their "strength", u know? like geges just sprinkling in androgyny for the spice 🧐

what is feminine vs masculine, how an individual embodies those traits in their gender identity r already complex topics. im obv generalizing a lot here, but i just, idk despite how many other nuanced philosophies gege explores, what is strong/desirable in jjk still falls down to all-out fighting abilities/physical prowess, emotional detachment, isolation, extremism, etc -- all things we harp on toxic masculinity for. and even when he critiques that, theres no cogent counter solution/way to be strong that gege provides, much less one that incorporates "femininity" and women

maybe im just asking for too much from gege after having read so many great representations of women and gender by female (and male) mangakas/writers but.. i shouldnt be 🙄 he can utilize his female characters more imo, esp when he can clearly set them up so well. and im sure theres things ive misread about jjk and its portrayal of femininity, theres plenty of holes in my thoughts ^^ anyways, this is obv not a great topic to bring up in a fandom that is so polarized between dudebros and women w unaddressed internalized misogyny.. so i welcome any and all thoughts and interpretations on ur end! (also omg im rlly sorry this got so long)

I love you feminist anon, if I may call you that lol, I just always name my anons 😂. I am so grateful that you sent this.

I feel like you've very eloquently explained the deeper reason as to why I personally can't relate to the female characters in jjk. If I'm honest, I like them and think they are fun and good enough representations or attempts at depicting the archetypes that rule their personalities.

As you say, however, some of them remain rather superficial and underutilized... and please forgive me anyone who loves them, but some of them feel like they are basically dudes wearing skirts.

No offense to dudes who wear skirts or people who like men who wear skirts or anyone for that matter. It's just that, as a personal preference, I like female characters that wear skirts, pants, leggings, etc and have equal amounts of masculine and feminine energy.

So, even if I find they are good enough, I've never necessarily loved jjk female characters, because, as you also say, I've read/seen one too many amazing and iconic female characters by other authors...

And it's not like I think you're asking for too much from Gege in wanting better female characters, it's just that, as you also said, I like his writing and I read jjk precisely because of what it's doing for my masculine psyche. Like... quite literally.

So perhaps I'm more forgiving than you are because of it? Because in all reality, there are female character moments in other manga that I have to give the bombastic side eye to, and jjk isn't one of them.

Let's taco'bout it more under the cut.

So, that said, I have to admit that you might not find a lot of "feminist oriented" content in my blog because my feminist lens is reserved for dealing with lame dudebros in my real life, and also, I honestly do not know how to wear the lens on the same level of depth as you do.

Also, since my blog's lens is depth psych, I very much focus on femininity and masculinity as psychological qualities that exist on opposite ends of a continuum regardless of biological gender. You'll see me refer to femininity and masculinity like this throughout my answer.

So because of this, I'm coming at the whole issue from a slightly different angle than you are. The way I see it, I think the way the jjk female characters are written and thematically utilized (basically everything you said), ultimately comes back to how Gege's exploration of femininity is limited by his own sense of self, and very much likely biased by the sociocultural landscape he grew up in.

I don't know how much you know about Japan, but Japan has one foot in the future, and one foot in the past...

And like... ok I'm totally oversimplifying the whole thing. All I'm saying is... Gege is a man who grew up in a man's world, sharing his view of the world through jjk, which is a story about initiation of the male psyche that is published in a magazine for young boys.

Do you see the pattern there?

So If you feel like his female characters are underutilized and underexplored, and that thematically jjk focuses way too much on masculinity and masculine definitions of strength at the expense of the feminine archetypes he does present (like Naoya as a vagina LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL)... well... to me, we're basically looking at the limits of his own relationship to his femininity, which, this relationship is in turn an imperative precursor for psychospiritual development in depth psych. More of this in a bit.

Anyways, that's my anticlimactic reasoning for why I am more forgiving about the issue than you are. To be honest, I've been so consumed exploring my masculine psyche through jjk (because personally my feminine psyche is more developed in certain aspects) that I just never focus on the female characters (that is not to mention what I shared earlier).

ANYWAYS, I fucking love what you wrote about Gege's exploration on power from a masculine perspective because you're 100% spot on. What I'll say to that is that, to me, from a depth psych perspective, that's kind of the whole point.

I invite you to look at it from this other level of perspective (in addition to the whole "Gege's psych is a product of his upbringing"): the whole idea of individuality and focusing on the sense of self as a measure of "The Strongest" is being shown as an incomplete part of the equation...

... that leaves "the strongest" ultimately feeling dissatisfied.

This is a sentiment echoed by several characters because ego strength (masculine definitions of strength) is ultimately an unbalanced measure of strength precisely because it ignores feminine values and measures of strength.

Who knows where Gege is taking jjk at this point, but I will admit I am hoping he is going to explore this in more depth because, central to Jungian thought and depth psych is the idea of the Buddhist middle path and union of opposites.

In Jungian psych this means that, when you have an unbalanced ego attitude like that, something has to give so that the pendulum swings in the opposite direction, which gives the ego the experiences it needs to integrate the "opposite" attitude. This ultimately results in a more holistic and balanced perspective for the ego.

That to say that I'm wondering if Gege is going to make the pendulum swing in the opposite direction with the whole "individuality" idea since self-preservation is a "masculine" trait. Again, psychologically, it's all about balance, and right now, the story is out of balance in favor of the masculine traits you mention.

But... to bring it back to Gege's possible limitations around his perception of femininity and how developing a healthy relationship to his anima (femininity) is a precursor for psychospiritual development... what if, on a meta level, jjk is depicting part of Gege's journey towards integrating and deepening his relationship to his femininity and what you're seeing is the beginning of that journey?

Hint hint Tsumiki! maybe I'll write about it someday

This is the thing... In depth psychology, more specifically what is called "the psychology of fairy tales", fairy tales and myths are stories that depict the thinking patterns of a peoples through metaphor and symbol. The characters in these myths and stories are thus characters playing out dramas in our own psyches. So basically, think of jjk as an objective exploration of Gege's subjectiveness (psyche).

Admittedly, even if the pendulum swings in the other direction (more feminine definitions of strength), you might find that his exploration is rather shallow or that it falls short of your expectations for what you'd like to see from a feminist perspective. And you wouldn't be wrong for it, it's just that Gege is probably not on the same level of understanding that you have about femininity because he's, like you and I, a human on a journey of self understanding and growth reflecting on how his environment has shaped who he is.

The same goes for women with internalized misogyny. Sometimes you don't know what you don't know, and coming to an understanding of it is a process that doesn't take place overnight.

So I think the only part I'll disagree with is that Gege is a sexist writer. But that's perhaps because I'm being a bit too technical in what sexist means? i.e. masc supremacy or hating women and perpetuating stereotypes. I think that rather than being sexist, his unconscious biases are showing, which is why someone like you can pick them out.

I do understand where you're coming from though, and admittedly perhaps I am being too forgiving of him.

Last thing I'll say is that I've said a couple of times that wanting for jjk to have these iconic female characters feels like an exercise in futility. In retrospect, I now understand that it's not that anyone shouldn't want for jjk to have iconic female characters, but that doesn't change the fact that jjk will probably remain the wrong manga to look for them, and that's something to make peace with because it is what it is.

So, here's to hoping we get a chance to see a deeper representation of feminine values in jjk or Gege's next manga. Because, if he's done such beautiful work with the masculine psyche, like you, I'd be curious to see what he makes of a deeper exploration of the feminine psyche.

Between you and I, I'd actually love reading a proper battle bl from Gege. And I mean proper. Like... gays so canon that even the dudebros can't deny it.

ANYWAYS... giiiiiiiirl what an ask 😮‍💨. I don't think I've done it justice tbh. But hopefully I made sense? I really do love what you wrote. It was very eye opening to see this age-old argument spelled out the way you did it. So thank you again for sharing your thoughts!

If you over have any other thoughts on the topic I look forward to hearing from you!

I rambled too so... hopefully I made sense 🤣.

#ask the mental gymnastics anime girl

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ace-does-stuff · 10 months ago

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people will tell you your entire life that one day you'll grow into comfort in a feminine body, while they do this they will uphold you to impossible standards of femininity, and when you fail to find comfort in your differences and try to deconstruct the way beauty standards have fucked you up they'll simply tell you to "get over it" because hey at least your body matches your gender, arent you happy? arent you happy you have inherent estrogen and use she/her? arent you happy that you're flat and blocky and cant wear anything feminine without feeling like a fucking clown cosplaying a human- because you have it good. you have what you want. arent you happy? arent you happy? arent you happy that youre a woman even though youll never pass as one? dont get mad at your hips or your chest, wear more complimenting clothes and push up bras. you have an out. you dont have to work for it. you were born into the body you want. stop acting like you have to do any work to be seen as a girl. it isnt your fault that youre not naturally pretty, makeup can fix that. its not your fault that nobody sees you as a girl, dresses can fix that. arent you happy you live like this?

#dysphoria #tw vent #but go ahead and reblog it if you wanna #tw dysphoria

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jinxjackie · 2 months ago

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whats the bi lesbian flag even look like* + also it would kind of feel like "losing" . to me. NOT IN THE SENSE THAT BI LESBIANS ARE BAD. OR "LESSER" = SOMETHING LOST. but in the sense that like. Being a monosexual bi lesbian supporter Is different than being a bi lesbian who supports bi lesbians Youknow. And also like. [REDACTED] .

*stupid about aesthetics and this would reassure me in a way. if it looks good

i guess its been sort of assumed abt me beforee. which isnt a Bad Thing again inherently. I still havent gotten up and this isnt even the real post . <3 BUT LIKE. auauhhhh it feels really uncomfortable to have other people say things abt My Identity that ive never said before!! Or for me to say things one way and have them interpreted another,,,,,,,

i think i vaguely recall one instance like. i was talking abt how i discovered that i enjoy being a more masculine woman + more feminine man (but not like. 100% on either of those things, i dont consider myself A Masculine Woman but i liked having some androgynous dyke edge if i had to be perceived as a woman, and i wldve liked having um Cute Feminine World Beam if only i could b perceived as Mostly a man) + someone started talking abt futch identities (I Support These i dont think they fit exactly into the butchfemme like. Dynamic? Strictly? and is more of a presentation word but you get it you get me. OK. pelase im begging) and it was uuhhahahh ahh nooooooooo. Nooooooo. or i used to rlly not like being called a fag and sometimes Tbh i still DONT because its like no please U dont get it . Im a fucking dyke. im a boy thats a dyke

im not like male except for when its cool . I love "ftm" i love "male lesbian" check out this vintage button

[id: a pale lavender button with the words "MALE LESBIANS UNITE" written on it in darker purple lettering, all caps. /end id]

#barking #ok im getting up now.#Asks and input on my gendersexuality fuckshit Very appreciated #especially asks. Im like a prey animal

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the-ethereal-demon · 1 year ago

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Something interesting I've noticed regarding gender in our system is that some of our parts are trans whereas others are cis, regardless of their actual gender.

One of our parts is something akin to a trans girl. Which i dont entirely understand bc we're afab... But im sure it has something to do with the inherent queerness of our gender.

The few parts of us that do identify in some way with girl-ness still dont have the cis female experience. And i think thats something that I've never acknowledged.

I think for a long time, i rejected femininity in all its forms. And as i became more cognizant of my own non-girl gender, i allowed myself to embrace a very specifc idea of femininity. You can be pretty in the way a boy is pretty, you can be a boy who likes dresses and nail polish. But i was still not acknowledging the full spectrum of femininity.

Im losing my train of thought a bit, but i think where im going with this, is that although i already recognize my very queer masculinity, and how that will never be the same way a cis man perceives himself, i never thought to consider that my femininity is also tied to my queerness. Even though i accept myself and my gender expression as a trans masculine person, im still phobic of the feminine parts of myself. Its hard because i know that people view me as a cis girl, when i am very much not that. And while i do feel some kinship with the lesbian experience (as many trans mascs do) i also never really delved into those feelings because it didnt "make sense". Yes i like girls, but im not a girl, so i cant be a lesbian [therefore] there is no insight to be gained about myself from exploring the lesbian way of relating to gender.

Uhh ramble rambles... ANYWAY the point being that i never considered the inherently queer feminine expression. I've been so phobic of "realizing" that im "just a girl" that i never explored anything remotely girl adjacent. Like yes you lesbians with your complex genders that is very cool and good for you, but its not for me. But like just because there are parts of me that may identify more with girl, isnt me admitting that i was wrong? Or that the way other people view me is correct. Regardless of where im at on the spectrum of human gender, i am very much queer, and that isnt something that will ever change.

#gender rambles #and this isnt me like coming out as anything #im definitely not saying im a lesbian #i just find that a lot of the lesbian gender fucketry is like idk good to be exposed to?#and helpful in understanding at least my own gender feelings #and obv this gets weird in the sense that like 99% of our system is still male #all different flavors of male and all very queer but still male #so like how does the girl part fit in #like am i genderfluid? or is the girl part just like extra feminine seasoning on top of the gay boys LOL #forest system #leaf talks

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daysten444 · 1 year ago

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Hi! This is 100% in good faith. I saw your tags on this post and I wanted to try to explain the issue, or at least my understanding of the matter! This is actually my 2nd time trying to send this ask bc tumblr sucks and crashed half way thru writing this the 1st time 😭

While "Women's only" spaces, such as gyms, are not inherently a negative thing, the issue is that this kind of separatist ideology, in reality, actually further promotes and emphasizes gender essentialism and isolation rather than actually combat the issue of misogyny and harassment. The op does have some points, such as having more personal trainers who are women and having self defense classes offered at gyms is a great and effective way of supporting the needs and safety of women. But the language and concept of the post is very clearly aimed towards a specific type of woman, centering them and their comfort, not even their actual safety but their Comfort, over the safety of all women, very clearly not taking intersectionality into consideration.

A brown butch woman or a fat stud or a trans girl who forgot to shave could all very much face the same dehumanization and harassment- if not more- at this gym, that she would at a common "all genders" gym, because of the reason that socially she is not granted the same level of womanhood as the ideal skinny, white, cisgender heterosexual woman. She is made out to be the outsider, someone who doesnt belong in the space of pink equipment and tarot cards, she becomes an intruder for simply existing in a space claiming to be for her, which hinders the comfort and perceived safety of the aforementioned socially """ideal""" woman. We are all too familiar with the phenomenon of when white women dont feel safe, they weaponize their white femininity against those ""interfering"" with their comfort. Yes we need safer spaces for women, but being comfortably isolated while posing in front of designated selfie mirrors isnt real safety. All the concept provided by the op does is create the fantasy without actually protecting those who are unsafe. It boils these issues down to "women are special and need their special spaces away from yucky men and others" instead of "we need to make actual systemic and societal changes to end the rape culture that excuses and promotes the harassment and assault of women"

Theres a lot more i could say on this topic as this doenst fully cover everything wrong with this sentiment, but i hope that what ive written has been helpful. I hope you have a wonderful day and take care ❤️

Thanks for explaining! That makes a lot of sense. Sometimes it does slip my mind when white ppl say things it’s always with context. I saw this from the perspective of It being something I personally would enjoy, but not everyone would and if it’s meant to be a safe space in the first place, it should prioritize the comfort of the group in question. But like you said, her definition of the group is not inclusive.

Thanks for taking the time to type this out even though Tumblr crashed on you. I’ll keep it in mind next time I see posts like this.

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britneyshakespeare · 4 years ago

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“season six is buffy’s best season because the big bad is Life Itself. there’s no camp. the scoobies all go through *real* issues. it’s torturous to get through because depression is like that.”

#i do not like enduring a season's worth of trauma thank you #buffy #text post #btvs #i'm sorry but there are just too many events that go on that make me never wanna rewatch it again. it was MISERABLE to get through #my first time watching.#it's not all bad but the concept of a 'real mental illness season w no supernatural baddie' is not as good as the allegorical villains #of seasons before it.#there were layers to all of those characters that represented adolescent struggles and feminine coming of age.#season six just rips the mask off and says now the trauma is EXTRAAA canon (as if it wasn't canon the whole time?)#(AS IF BUFFY DIDNT KILL AND SEND HER BOYFRIEND TO HELL AS A 17-YEAR-OLD?)#season six of btvs is a perfect example of why i think 'realism' does NOT inherently equate to better art. in fact sometimes the goal #is just to make the art more bleak and ultimately less beautiful and less enjoyable #art should be a higher level above life. it should be exploratory.#also 'realistic' doesnt have to mean 'fucking pessimistic and sad' but thats a wider societal philosophical issue isnt it?

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erotetica · 4 years ago

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who is never not thinking about tall women with deep voices? Lesbians, demonstratively. trans women are also hot for this

#I think about this every time I speak from the chest to seem hotter to the gal ringing up my spinach #anyway. anyway.#this isnt like. a preaching at anyone to do or not do #also not. trans wlw being inherently butch/masculine. THIS IS ABT FEMMES.#look listenblisteb who doesn't get up their own ass thinking abt the validating...ness of wombyn. plural #in proximity #*shia labeouf sighing in the movie theater* abt any queer woman's lack of expression/expression of femininity #bc its nonstandard! Usually!#like!#is emelia fart societal-standard-pretty? no but she's absolutely femme #what the FUCK am I trying to verbalize #whatever ^^that shit is^^ is not cis exclusive experience #I dont get it!!! I wear mens glasses bc + my mask people mistake me for a 'sir' and i love mindfucking old cuban men in tollbooths #but I love to see it!! its good!!!#femmes I mean #I've made mimosas with vodka #my point is if you gay for gwendolyn christie but are transmysogynist u have brainworm make a plague doctor give you #cocaine abt it

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trust-me-i-just-get-weirder · 6 years ago

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if you ever need to “dive deeper“ or “unpack things further“ for some kind of critical analysis paper, try mentally making a small brain big brain galaxy brain meme on it. It’s a surprisingly effective format for finding a direction to go in

#personal #college #small brain: cult film is masculine #bigger brain: cult film is purposefully forbidding to women to exclude them from cult spaces #huge brain: since cult is percieved as a masculinized space analysis and time is only given to the masculine aspects at the expense of femal #e cult film audiences #galaxy brain: cult film isnt an inherently masculine concept its just the male anti feminist film scholars from the 90s that have framed the #discussion of cult exclusively around male oriented cult as a way to label the mainstream as feminine and give themselves some pseudo margin #alized cred and a sense of persecution #universe brain: titanic and mean girls and star wars are all bigger cult films than pulp fiction and you cant convince me otherwise #and thats gonna be my final essay #see #its a good format #yes i know i should be working #im considering this work for now #thats my initial argument outine #hah #pls give feedback #im bored #edit: subtract star wars from the equation i meant to say star trek and star wars is already respected

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defiantdreemurrs · 1 month ago

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tell me you didnt read my post without saying “i didnt read your post”

jeans and tshirt USED to be a male outfit. as time has gone on more and more women - many of them femmier than you could likely ever accept - wear the same fit. not because the fit is inherently masculine and they want to appear more masculine, but because things change with time and “jeans and tshirt” is no longer inherently associated with masculinity in the public eye. there are incredibly “feminine” jeans out there (“feminine” in quotes because i dont believe clothes are inherently gendered because thats bioessentialism, but these kinds of jeans are made by corporations to appeal broadly to women, hence “feminine”). this is why i call it a genderless fit because society has largely stripped jeans of their masculinity, and also because calling women “masculine” just for wearing jeans and tshirt feels disgustingly misogynistic.

as for your second point where you clearly exemplify not having read my post, butch ISNT an insult. nowhere do i imply it is! but i dont think someone should be “honored” for being “thought of” as butch because there are some girls out there who dont WANT to be butch. trans girls especially. do you think its nice to call trans girls things they dont want to be called? especially when they dont even present butch in the first place? i alternate between dresses, skirts, and jeans and tshirt because im something of a tomboy. but im not butch, im femme. i like being girly. i just also like wearing jeans and tshirt.

and yes i do think its misgendering to call SOME trans women butches. butches are obviously women and if you genuinely think i dont know that then you clearly must be an idiot who just wants to argue with me in bad faith instead of actually giving a shit about anything i said. but again, not all trans women want to be butch! and calling them butch anyways is implying an inherent masculinity to their appearance. because what people like you dont understand is that most people who call femmy trans girls “butch” arent doing so because they ACTUALLY think the girl is butch. theyre doing it because THEY see butch as carrying that degree of inherent masculinity and think trans women as a whole are ultimately just “men in dresses” instead of actually seeing us as women. its this thing called transmisogyny, maybe look it up.

hope this helps! maybe next time you can try to engage in good faith discussion with a trans girl instead of talking down to her implying you know better than her and that she should shut her mouth and get called butch while wearing a dress and feel “honored” for doing so!

jeans and tshirt is not “androgynous” its not “butch” its not “dykey” its not “masc” jeans and tshirt is the ultimate genderless fit because theyre just FUCKING CLOTHES AND LITERALLY ANYONE CAN WEAR THEM WEARING JEANS AND TSHIRT DOESNT MAKE YOU A BUTCH YOU CAN WEAR JEANS AND TSHIRT AND STILL BE FEMME STOP CALLING EVERYONE BUTCH OR MASC

even butches will agree with me on this like the femmiest bitch wearing jeans and tshirt is not a butch and im sure butches AND femmes alike will take issue with that because butch culture is its own thing and cant be summarized into “jeans and tshirt” BUT ALSO STOP MISGENDERING FEMMY TRANS GIRLS WHO HAPPEN TO WEAR JEANS AND TSHIRT OR CALLING THEM BUTCH WHEN THEYRE NOT FUCKING MASC OR BUTCH

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