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roleplaycharacter1shots · 2 years ago

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the end of an era

Warning(s): Loss of parents, grief

Word Count: 1235

Character(s): Damian Green

Summary: Damian returns to his parents’ home after his father passes away. Takes place in 1996.

Using the following prompts by @creativepromptsforwriting:

Prompt #112: use the words sigil, secret, and sorrow

Prompt #84: use the words orange, spices, and sweetness

Prompt #269: There is a common saying about the calm before the storm. But no one ever talks about the deafening silence after the storm hit.

Permission to reblog, @creativepromptfills.

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For the first time in a while, Damian had a weekend off. He was certainly grateful for it, but now it meant he had some free time to finish cleaning out his parents’ house. It was not a task he had been looking forward to in the weeks following his father’s passing. However, it needed to be done in order for the house to be sold. And Damian knew he would regret it if he did that without giving the place at least one last look over.

To Damian’s relief, Colton Green had passed fairly peacefully. He knew that his father’s heart had shattered upon the loss of his wife the year before, so he was at the very least happy to think that the two of them were at last in each other’s arms again. The funeral for his now late father had taken place a week ago, but sometimes it still felt like just yesterday. Going through his death and the necessary goodbyes had been hard and tumultuous, filling Damian with a range of emotions. And sorrow was somehow only one of those many feelings. Losing one parent had been hard enough, especially with the reign of terror currently going on in Europe, but having another go not very long after made Damian’s whole life feel like just one devastating gale. So he permitted his work as a fairly new Auror to shield him, working through the rain and sleet alike as best he could.

There is a common saying about the calm before the storm. But no one ever talks about the deafening silence after the storm hit. The creak of the front door opening was the only sound that echoed through the one-floor ranch house. Damian was used to being greeted by stillness at his own apartment, but hearing it here was eerie. It was no secret that this place would never be the same now that its previous inhabitants would no longer be returning, but the reality of it all was still harsh to accept. As he shut the door behind him, Damian took a moment to close his eyes.

Almost immediately, his mind went back in time to reminisce. Because his mother had been gone the longest, she was the first to appear. The corners of her eyes crinkled as she smiled at her son. While Maria Green had not returned to her Florida hometown in quite a few years, her skin remained just as sunkissed as it always had been. The smell of spices filled Damian’s nostrils, anise and cinnamon if he remembered correctly, as she moved to greet him. Her lack of physical presence was not lost on him, but he was comforted by the phantom scents. Maria’s mouth moved soundlessly as she appeared to call for his father, who was seated in the living room reading the paper. The scene was laid out like a typical Sunday morning, judging by how Colton set aside the large comic section instead of his usual stock market updates. Despite being retired, the old man still took the time to see how his investments were doing.

The visual faded away as Damian opened his eyes again. He savored the still lingering scents from the brief memory as he headed for the kitchen. There, his moment was interrupted by a different sweetness hanging in the air. Brow furrowing in both distaste and puzzlement, Damian wondered where the slightly soured smell was coming from. It didn’t take long for him to locate the bowl of untouched past-their-prime oranges on the countertop. Damian couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight, despite the flies he waved away on approach. The fruit had clearly been untouched for some time, indicating that his father never had any intention of eating them. Therefore, Damian could see the orange being an obvious sigil of Colton’s love for his late wife.

He had heard often of the tale of how his parents had met. While on a business trip in Miami, Colton had decided to take a brief tour of an orange grove. There, he had become quickly entranced by the owner’s daughter. He did not impress the farmer with his New Yorker banker background, but Maria was just as smitten. In an almost fairytale-like fashion, the pair showed one another their different lifestyles: that of a southern belle and a Yankee city slicker. Damian’s mother was certainly more than just a simple farmgirl, running the numbers and a great portion of her family’s orange farm behind the scenes. And his father was not just a stiff white-collar worker, having no problem rolling up his sleeves and getting some dirt under his nails with cars and gardens alike.

Colton promised Maria the world, even if he didn’t have a single penny to his name. But her family never consented to their union, despite everything Damian’s father tried to do to please them. His mother was choosing someone outside of their class and culture, and the couple had no choice but to leave Florida and the orange trees behind. Colton started by taking Maria around the country, showing her all that he could just as he promised. Over the next few years, his parents traveled to each and every state. They would have gone further if Maria hadn’t discovered she was pregnant while they were visiting the Grand Canyon.

Growing up, Damian had heard most of the story from his parents, but some of the details could also be pieced together with help from their massive scrapbook collection. The books the pair had made of their journey were beautiful, and Damian made sure to collect them immediately after disposing of the rotting oranges. He took a seat on the couch with the multicolored stack of books beside him. While he knew his parents had been expecting him and his sister then, it was interesting to watch the pages skip from the Grand Canyon right into their wedding planning in Niagara Falls. Their honeymoon had been spent between New York and Canada, giving Colton and Maria a bit more time together before they welcomed Damian and his twin sister into the world.

Despite how the pregnancy itself had not been depicted, nearly every moment following the twins’ birth had been captured. Damian did not have any personal memories of the sister he had shared his mother’s womb with, as she had passed before taking her first breath, but his parents’ scrapbook allowed him to see the pair of them side-by-side. One would have thought she had died later on, she looked so serene in the photos. But out of all of the rest, his sister’s pictures were the only ones that did not move. Even after all these years and never having known her, Damian couldn’t help but feel the pain of yet another missing piece to his heart at the sight.

He shut the book, balancing it briefly in his palms. The sight of the cover blurred slightly as the tears came. The silence around him was stifling, somehow more overwhelming than constant noise. Damian had never felt so alone before, and this grief cut deeper than any physical blow he had ever received. And unlike a bruise, the hurt would take much longer to heal, if it would at all. He missed them all greatly, but all he could now was say goodbye and move forward with their memories.

#character development #benedict cumberbatch #tgs wide #hp community #hp roleplay #tw parents #tw death #grief #grieving #reminiscing #losing a parent #prompt fill #writing prompt #prompt #writing prompts

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pop-punklouis · 2 years ago

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I posted 21,171 times in 2022

5,484 posts created (26%)

15,687 posts reblogged (74%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@polkadotmotmot

@dailytomlinson

@ladychlo

@holyshit

@himboniall

I tagged 14,789 of my posts in 2022

Only 30% of my posts had no tags

#grey - 3,313 posts

#pop punk!louis - 391 posts

#weird uncle - 168 posts

#gimme - 163 posts

#*palpatine voice* queue it - 126 posts

#tessa - 122 posts

#🤍 - 114 posts

#god me - 91 posts

#the maine - 88 posts

#remember - 84 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#also some happy updates since i’ve been gone 💕: 1) i registered for graduation last week and it still hasn’t hit me that in dec i’ll have

My Top Posts in 2022:

i’m sorry but seeing that tiny pride flag in one of the boxes backstage regardless of who took it and knowing louis performs a song every night that resonates with his queer audience just makes me think about how much has changed since 2013. how unfathomable this would’ve been just two years ago actually. it’s really nice to take a step back and look at these things and notice the progression that’s been had in his image with something that has been isolated from him for so long. so so excited for him.

860 notes - Posted February 2, 2022

all the pride flags made me incredibly emotional

932 notes - Posted February 2, 2022

hiiiiiiii so i wanted to tell my closest friends before talking about it publicly but uh i won a radio contest yesterday. i’m meeting louis next week :( i’m eating lunch with louis next week :( it still doesn’t feel real, but i’ve been an emotional mess since i found out. i don’t know how to comprehend it honestly like!!!! i can’t believe it’s happening after all these years?? i’ve been thinking about 16 year old me and how much i gravitated towards him as i grew older. how much solace i found in him as i grew older. how out of touch the thought of meeting him even was back then and :( i really needed this news right now and i’m just really happy and grateful and yeah 🥺✨🕯 i cant even process it.

965 notes - Posted September 13, 2022

See the full post

1,020 notes - Posted September 21, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i’ll write a more in-depth post later but:

written all over your face: a mixture between grunge-rock and pop-punk. the guitars were absolutely insane. such a fast heat. you guys are not ready for this song in particular. she’s the main character of this era 1000% pop punk princess

face the music: think early 2000s pop punk. very similar to written all over your face, but much more condensed. the bridge was phenomenal. a chanting “WHOA WHOA WHOA” that is definitely a crowd moment. we were racing around each other during that part. reminiscent of reliant k, cartel, jimmy eat world.

Saturday: A sadder track. it’s one of the best ballads he’s ever written. his vocals were incredible. the bridge of saturdays has such a soaring quality to it, and it builds to his high vocal moment.

all this time: very tame impala 2015 very fuzzy synths. very driving down the highway at night. it’s just a steady alt-club hit.

the departure of sound from walls when it comes to FITF is insane like i know he said it was different, but it truly feels like FITF is it’s own animal. it feels entirely louis. it just exudes such a punkier edge both in sound and in feel. this is his record

1,095 notes - Posted September 21, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #false #i love how all of my top posts are just about louis DJDJDKFKF #also the pop punk!louis tag being my second most used tag yeah blessed

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confusedandpregnant · 2 years ago

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5w 4d

Time: 8:51am

Physical check:

Physical Health - I’m on year 84 of what I think is cold, but the more I read about pregnancy, the more I just can’t tell if this is just a pregnancy symptom. Otherwise, I’m still feel [generally] ok.

Special Note -> Boobs - Continuing to get bigger (and more painful). Will now refer to myself as Tits McGee as these newfound torpedoes are a stark change to the two deflated balloons I’ve been carrying with me up until about a week ago.

Mental check:

Mental Health - Following yesterday’s meltdown (2x in one week, 3x since learning of the happy news 2.5 weeks ago), I seem to be a little better today although the day is still young, and I who knows what kind of adventures my hormones and anxiety might bring. I do feel like I’m constantly sitting on my Pandora’s box of feelings, determinedly holding down the lid to try to enjoy what I worry will be the last few days of normalcy before everything kicks off. So whoever got me sick before the pregnancy symptoms kick in, Fuck You.

Questions yet to be answered:

1) When am I going to get morning sickness? Is this morning sickness right now?

2) Can someone help me find the excitement I first felt when I found out I was pregnant, which now has been brutally replaced with a tidal wave of intense fear and anxiety ? Maybe I should check the compartment where I stored my ability to concentrate in meetings, which now also seems to have disappeared. Actually, who am I kidding, it was never around much to begin with.

Learnings so far:

Every day is different, and you can either take that as a massive anxiety trigger, or you can ride the wave out and deal with it when as it comes. In a way, it’s probably the most exciting thing you’ll go through during pregnancy now that you can’t do anything fun. Did I mention I’m going to an embroidery course tonight?

Final thoughts:

Originally, I was excited to tell people. But now, I’m actually dreading it because it feels like everyone gets so excited for me (which I always did for friends when they told me their news) but actually, I’m so filled with worry and questions that I know my response is quite confusing and might be a little concerning for people.

The fact is, I can’t show excitement because it’s buried under all the layers of fear about what I’m going to lose. I know that sounds selfish, and trust me, I’m pretty horrified by it myself as I’ve spent so much of my life waiting for this moment. But right now, all I can think is:

- I’ll never be able to sleep in (actually, sleep through the night) again.

- I’ll never be able to do what I want, when I want, ever again.

- This is the first step towards getting old and basically dying.

Dramatic? Maybe (read: definitely). It’s my my cross to bear.

This whole thing is still so conceptual that I can’t comprehend loving my baby just yet. Right now, it’s just a bunch of cells that are shoving me into a different lane of life which I’m terrified I’m just not ready for. But will I ever be ready ? And will having a child compensate for all the sacrifices, or do mothers just get on with it and change perspective to accept how their life has changed?

Time will tell...

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kexing · 4 years ago

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the old guard invented action movies on this day six months ago 🥺✊🏻

#it feels like just yesterday and 84 years ago #the old guard #tog #mj talks

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writer-kermit · 3 years ago

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"You're Enough.."

Pairing: Third Year!Tsukishima Kei x 1st Year!Abused!Reader

Genre: Angst to Fluff

Commissioned or Self Made: Self Made

Word Count: 1.3k

A/N: Hey guys! So I'm not doing very well this time, other than the fact I've finished Attack on Titan, I've been stressed out because of home as well. So to cope, I've made a comforting Tsukishima fic. Let’s try to reach the goal of $375! I hope y'all enjoy!

TW: Mention of abuse, scars and bruises, possible fight, swearing, mentions of suicide & mental health

You and your family had a lot of adversities in your life. You could never get all of you to get along, and it ends up being another violent strife.

You talk about your family to Tsukishima at a minimum, in fear that he might call Child Services. You two like to make fun of your parents. But afterwards, Tsukishima gives out surprisingly good advice, to help your family’s relationship. You could even call him “Therapist Tsukishima”.

There was a time where you stopped talking about your family with Tsukishima, your parents overheard your conversation a while ago. As punishment, you were yelled at and beaten for it. You’d come to high school sore and bruised all over, and Tsukishima is the one who takes care of them. He would occasionally ask you what happened with your family, but you kept changing the subject. You didn’t want to get in trouble, and you didn’t want him to get in trouble as well.

You soon became insecure about yourself. You began to ask questions. “Am I a bad friend”?”Am I being too self centric”? “Am I doing the right thing”? Those types of questions corrupted your mind, and the questions began turning into facts. “I’m a bad friend”, “I’m being too self centric”, “I’m doing the right thing by not telling anyone about my distraught moments”.

It was the following day of school, and you were trying to erase the thought of your sibling trying to end their life yesterday. You were exhausted due to lack of sleep, and your body was in pain. As you stumbled your way to high school, you met Tsukishima at the front.

“There’s my favorite first year.” he chuckled, resting his hand on your shoulder. “How are we doing today?” You forced a smile out, you can’t let him know, right? “Hi Tsukki. I’m doing fine.” You muttered, in hope he doesn’t ask you questions about your state. It was the last thing you wanted him to do anyway. “You sure? It looks like you’re limping.”

Shit. You are limping.

“Oh! I was doing more workouts for my dance recitals! So that’s why I’m so sore.” You said, as you tried to stand properly. Tsukishima cocked an eyebrow, leering at your posture. “Ok then.” Tsukishima faltered as you both walked into the school.

Time flew like the speed of light as you now were transferring into lunch. You met Tsukishima again, and he was gesturing to you to sit next to him. “Oi, pipsqueak. You're not gonna tell your grade for that exam you took?” Oh yeah, you had a exam today. “I got 84%.” You responded.

“That’s great, for a pipsqueak like you.”

“No it’s not.”

Tsukishima frowned when you said that. “What do you mean?” “84% is a B. It’s not a good enough grade.” “Well that exam was hard, and you did well compared to other students.” You kept silent, as you looked down at your untouched lunch. Soon the bell rang and both you and Tsukishima left the cafeteria without a word.

It was late afternoon and you had just finished up your classes, as always, you’d watched Tsukishima as he was in volleyball practice. You sat on the bleachers, hunched away from anything and everyone. You rested your head against your knees as you closed your eyes, hoping to disappear.

Everything seems a blur now. Is this what it feels when you are suffering in silence? You began to rethink about “Those Questions” once more, but the only difference is that they now have answers. You are not a good friend. You are incredibly selfish. You deserve this pain. You are worthless. You-

“Hey (Y/N), we need to talk. Privately.”

You looked up to see Tsukishima, who was now in front of you. At first you wanted to ignore him, but given the fact he has rarely ever done this before, you decided to follow him to the club room.

The room was small, but unusually enjoyable. You sat down across from him, using every fiber in your being to avoid eye contact.

“Be honest with me. Are you ok?” He asked. “Yes.” “Can you look up at me please?” You looked up at him, only for him to look back at you. But instead of being bashful, your stomach began to ache in pain from the anxiety. “Now tell me again. Are you really ok?” He asked again, causing you to become more irritated. “Yes! I’m fine!”

“No you’re not.”

You gawked at him. Not knowing what to say next. “[Y/N], do you seriously think I’m stupid?” You didn’t answer him. You didn’t want to answer him, so you just let him continue. “You didn’t think I saw how you acted these past few weeks, or those bruises on your body?”

You felt your heart drop when he said those lines. He knew? But how? “You know. You’re not really good at lying.” “So why didn’t you say something sooner?” “Because I know you would just lie again or avoid the question.” “Well why didn’t you just force it out of me?!” You were angry at this point, you felt hot tears stream down your face.

“Because I know what you’re hiding from me involves your family.”

It seemed like Tsukishima already knew what was going on. You couldn’t help but to break down in front of him, yelling and crying in frustration.

“I hate my parents Tsukki!” You sobbed. “They always make me and my siblings feel like we’re never good enough for them!” You banged your fist at the table as Tsukishima walked over to you. He took your right arm and pulled you into an embrace. “My sibling even fucking tried to kill themselves because of it! And they blamed them for not doing well at school! Every time when we talked about our mental health, they would ignore us,” You looked up at Tsukishima once more. His facial expression never changed since. “They would even beat us! I hate them Tsukki! I hate them!” You seeped into his chest as his hand massaged your back slowly. Eventually, you calmed down, your body still enacted with his.

“[Y/N], can I tell you something?” You hesitated at first, but you answered yes. “I’m proud of you, for telling me this.” “Why?” You asked him weakly. He chuckled warmly, causing your heart to throb, not in pain, but rather in love.

“Because your parents wouldn’t get to hear their own child standing up for themselves.” He lifted your chin, compulsing you to look up at him. “They wouldn’t see how incredibly smart you are.” He continued. “They wouldn't see how good of a friend you are. They wouldn’t see how strong you are. And of course..” He stopped to stare at you one last time, right before kissing you on your lips.

The sudden action shocked you at first, but then you began to relax. “They wouldn't know how much I love you.”

You couldn’t help but to cry again. Not in anger, but rather in happiness. Who could have ever known that Tsukishima was soft for you? Well, his friends probably. “The same could be said for you.” You giggled.

He smiled at you again, kissing your forehead. The two of you stayed in the clubroom until school was over. But before you could end the day, you decided to ask Tsukishima “Those Questions”.

“Tsukki.. Am I selfish?” You asked him. “I would argue that you’re selfless, but it’s always okay to have your selfish moments.” He replied. “Am I a bad friend?” You asked him again. He turned his head to you. His face looked like you offended him. “If you were a bad friend, then I wouldn’t be talking to you dummy.” He teased, playfully pinching your ear. “Ahaha! Stop!” You squealed. “Well..” You trailed your own words as you slowly looked up to Tsukishima one last time.

“Am I good enough?”

The room was silent, then Tsukishima pulled you in for another embrace. The hug was deeper than the last one, as if Tsukishima thought of you like a stuffed animal, maybe even a spouse.

“You're more than enough [Y/N].” He replied. “I promise, that you are enough.”

#Spotify #writing #haikyuu!!#haikyuu tsukishima #tsukishima kei #tsukishima comfort #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima x you #SoundCloud #angst to fluff

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danielxricciardo · 3 years ago

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Prompts

1. "Hi, my ex just walked in. Would you hold my hand please?"

2. "I didn't expect to see you here."

3. "Have you seen this dog?"

4. “That mouth of yours, does it ever stop making noise”

5. “Seven minutes in heaven is for virgin teenagers”

6. “Slam that door one more time and I’ll shove my foot straight up your cute ass”

7. “Jesus! Knock next time would you”

8. “You have money go and get yourself a hoodie that’s not mine”

9. "I hate roses, I thought you knew"

10. "Do you think I am an angel? Ha"

11. "I wanted to sleep but someone decided to die"

12. "I can kill you right now, what are you talking about?"

13. "Hi, I am lost, can you come after me?"

14. "When I first saw you I wanted to date your best friend"

15. "I am so funny and you are just jealous"

16. "If I have to choose... no"

17. "Stop breathing like that!"

18. "I just did my nails"

19. "I'm the best driver în the world"

20. "Will you marry me?" "No"

21. "I think I broke my arm" "So?"

22. "I think I love you" "Thanks"

23. "My arms are lonely, don't you think?"

24. "Apparently we are dating"

25. “Well it’s kind of hard to move when you’re sitting on my lap”

26. "Those things you said yesterday, did you mean them?"

27. "If we elope, you think they'll kill us?"

28. "This is yours"

29. "You can’t just kiss me, laugh and then walk away."

30. "Are you using ass as a pillow?"

31." I find your lack of faith disturbing."

32. "And I took it personally"

33. "In here I am the boss"

34. "Oh, bite me!" "Where?"

35. "What will you do if we break up?"

36. "Where is my T-shit?"

37. "This is no time for sarcastic comments." "There is always time for sarcastic comments."

38. "I’ll keep quiet, you won’t even know I’m here."

39. "The way you flirt is just awful"

40. "Don’t be fooled. I’m the epitome of mess."

41. " If you are on TV should I congratulate you?"

42. "And this, is why we can’t have nice things."

43. "That's what he said"

44. "I am scared of your boss"

45. "You should know, a lot of girls have a crush on me"

46. "Everyone is afraid of you"

47. "If I'm watching that movie one more time I'll lose my fucking mind!"

48. "I thought being on vacation will be stress free"

49. "My parents don't trust you"

50. "I don't think I should give my last name so easily"

51. “I really wish I could unsee that.”

52. “Who would’ve guessed we’d be sharing a room.”

53. “I feel like you have an unhealthy obsession with me.”

54. “Nah he’s fine, it’s the other one you really got to watch out for.”

55. “I have a suggestion.” “I’m not taking my clothes off so forget it.”

56. “You’re the genius, why don’t you tell me?”

57. “Have I ever told you your accent makes me swoon?” “Really?” “No.” He/she smiles. “ that’s why I’ve never told you.”

58. “I’m alive? How am I still alive?”

59. “You’re crazy! I love it!”

60. “Never have I ever is about to get a lot more interesting.”

61. “What did they do?” “Dude. They did the do.”

62. "You can’t keep pretending it didn’t happen, cause guess what? It did!"

63. "Well this is awkward."

64. "Im too sober for this."

65. "Im pregnant." "Wall done, Virgin Mary!"

66. " I want to protect you."

67. "Kill that spider and maybe I'll forgive you"

68. "I have no one to go to the wedding"

69. "Don’t you dare touch _______!"

70. "I thought you were dead!"

71. "This is, without a doubt, the stupidest plan you’ve ever had. Of course I’m in."

72. "Take care of you, please"

73. "If your best friend single?"

74. "Just remember, if we get caught, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English."

75. "Why does everyone assume we're a couple?"

76. "Im craving something sweet" "Are you pregnant or something?"

77. " What is the magic word?" "I'll kill you în your sleep"

78. "When I see you my knees get weak"

79. "Finally you're single. Can I take you on a date?"

80. " So, I guess you don’t do after hours?"

81. "I know what I'm doing, I've watched two whole seasons of Grey's Anatomy."

82. "I can't believe I'm stuck here with you right now."

83. "Okay, this did not go as I planned it in the shower."

84. "I'm not going to sit around and watch you destroy yourself."

85. "You were my best friend"

86. "You did what?"

87. "Can you just pretend to love me for a second!"

88. "You are enough"

89. "Take the shirt off"

90. "Your nickname is bitch"

91. "What do you want to watch?" "You"

92. "How could you ask me that?"

93. "Your mouth does this thing and I can't resist it"

94. "Are you allowed to drink?"

95. "I said Im done, leave me alone!"

96. "Don’t raise your fucking voice at me”

97. “Yeah, I remember the drill”

98. “Tell me again, slowly this time, why that dog is in my bed.”

99. “Gave you so much, but it wasn’t enough.”

100. “You and me, we were destined to fall apart.”

101. “No, you don’t know who you are until somebody breaks your heart.”

102. “I want to tell you everything. The words I never got to say the first time around.”

103. “It’s better to feel pain, than nothing at all.”

Song lyrics prompts

1. “It’s the little things about us, that I love so much.”

2. “Last night I told you I loved you // woke up blamed it on the vodka”

3. “It’s a better place since you came along”

4. “You make me love the things I hate “

5. Just a paper sheet and half a cigarette are left in my hand

6. Your faith walks on broken glass

7. "And can you teach me how to dance real slow?"

8. "I'll throw away my faith, babe, just to keep you safe"

9. "One night, you won't forget the rest of your life"

10. "We only said goodbye with words"

11. "I'll try to give you love until the day you drop"

12. "I like the pretty boys with the bow tie"

13. "Lets get drunk forget what we did"

14. Your kisses lift me higher

15. When you're ready we can share the wine

16. "And if you don't love me now you will never love me again"

17. "Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?"

18. "When there's nothing to lose and there's nothing to prove"

19. She's the kind of girl who only asks you over when its raining, just to make you lie there catching water dripping from the ceiling.

20. Now I understand, you're a human, and you got to lie, you're a man

21. The good and the bad times: we've been through them all.

22. Now I ain't educated but I sure ain't stupid

23. I grew up in the shoes they told me I could fill

24. It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep

25. A lover would just complicate my plans

26. And in the morning, i’ll be with you, but it will be a different kind

27. My heart is yours, it’s you that i hold on to

28. And with one kiss, you inspired a fire of devotion that lasts for twenty years

29. I let go of my claim on you, it’s a free world

30. I’m in my bed, and you’re not here and there’s no one to blame, but the drink in my wandering hands

31. Cause you gave me peace and i wasted it, I’m here to admit that you were my medicine

32. Oh, dear diary, i met a boy, he made my doll heart light up with joy. Oh, dear diary, we fell apart, welcome to the life of electra heart

33. For you, I would cross the line, I would waste my time, I would lose my mind

34. Is it really me you're missing?

35. Remember that night?

36. How many times can I break till I shatter?

37. As long as I breathe, I’ll call you my home

38. "You wouldn't know love if it crushed your fucking chest."

39. "When we scream our lips don't make a sound."

40. "Please don't let me sink, wrap your arms around me and carry me home."

41. "This hasn't torn us apart so nothing ever will."

42. "A long time ago we believed that we were united."

43. "I miss the person that you were but I don't miss you."

44. "If home is where the heart is, why do I feel so fucking heartless?"

45. "I can't live, I can't breathe with or without you just go away."

46. "I'm not afraid to die, I'm afraid I'll survive and have to watch you suffer."

47. "I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away."

48. "I'm not like you I just fuck up."

49. "All because of you I believe in angels, not the kind with wings, no not the kind with halos. The kind that bring you home when home becomes a strange place."

50. "I just want to go to sleep and never wake up again."

51. “I wish people liked me more.”

52. “How could I ever love someone else?”

53. “I guess you’re getting everything you want.”

54. “She probably gives you butterflies.”

55. “I hope that you’re okay.”

56. “I defended you to all my friends.”

57. “I never cared about what they say, only care about me and you”

58. “Either way i’m gonna lose, so i’m just gonna keep on loving you”

59. “You know i’m bad at communication, it’s the hardest thing for me to do”

60. “Iwas your lover, i was your friend, now I’m only just someone you call when it’s late enough to forget”

61. “It’s fucked up but it’s true that i love you like i do”

62. “Well we both had nights waking up in strangers beds but i don’t wanna, don't wanna, i don’t wanna give up yet”

63. “Tell me I’ve got it wrong somehow.”

64. “I’m begging for you to take my hand.”

65. “I can’t make it go away by making you the villain.”

66. “He feels like home.”

67. “I’d be breaking all my rules to see you.”

68. “But I know you’re not scared of anything at all.”

69. “When can I come back?”

70. “I’m ready to owe you anything”

71. “I’ll always look best in your head”

72. “I know you know it’s wrong, but I’m ready”

73. “All I ever want is breaking me apart.”

74. “Let's talk sweetly like all our love is false.”

75. “You put a fire in my heart, painted blood on my stars, gave me faith.”

76. “I wanna meet your girlfriend, she sounds nice.”

77. “How is kissing me so wrong?“

78. “Can’t you see that I’m already yours?”

79. “I’ve been losing track of the romantic sh*t I’m tryna say but basically I love you"

80. “I don’t wanna be your friend, I wanna kiss your lips, I wanna kiss you until I lose my breath”

81. “I apologize for all your tears, I wish I could be different but I’m still growing up into the one you can call your love”

82. “I’m out of my head, of my heart, of my mind cause you can run but you can’t hide, I’m gonna make you mine”

83. "I never loved someone the way that I love you"

84. "It's the way that you know what I thought I knew, it's the beat that my heart skips when I'm with you"

85. "I hope she gettin' better sex, hope she ain't fakin' it like I did, babe"

86. “I know we’re young and people change and we may never feel the same”

87. “I can’t change the world, but maybe I’ll change your mind”

88. "You don't own me. Don't tie me down 'cause I'd never stay."

89. "Leave everything that is worth a single cent and just take me instead."

90. "And then I got you off your knees, put you right back on your feet, just so you can take advantage of me."

91. "Hey, I can't let you go with nobody. Cause I love you, baby."

92. "Tell me that it wasn't my fault and that I was enough for you."

93. "We were good at faking forever, I get it, whatever."

94. "Cause you had your chance and you blew it. Yeah, you ripped it up and you chewed it."

95. "Well, I'm too busy for your business. Go find a girl who wants to listen."

96. "Stop looking at me with those eyes, like I could disappear and you wouldn't care why."

97. "Oh, we could do whatever you want, but boy, don't go falling in love, you can't stay with me, all you'll ever have is one day with me"

98. "I pray the medication slow me down, but that shit doesn't work when you're around"

99. "Told her that I loved her once and now she'd kill for me"

100. "What the tell were we? Tell me we weren't just friends"

Who I write for

Formula 1

Daniel Ricciardo

Lewis Hamilton

Max Verstappen

Charles Leclerc

Esteban Ocon

Carlos Sainz

Lando Norris

Lance Stroll

Sebastian Vettel

Mick Schumacher

Pierre Gasly

George Russel

Football

Erling Haaland

Jadon Sancho

Giovanni Reyna

Jude Bellingham

Julian Brandt

Marco Reus

Roman Bürki

Emre Can

Mats Hummels

Leon Goretzka

Joshua Kimmich

Kai Havertz

Mason Mount

Christian Pulisici

Ben Chilwell

Gerard Pique

João Félix

Ianis Hagi

Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain

Trent Alexander-Arnold

Virgil van Dijk

Jens Petter Hauge

Martin Ødegaard

Alexander Sørloth

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #imagine #fanfiction #formula 1 #football #my prompts #soccer #erling haaland #daniel ricciardo #max verstappen #charles leclerc #carlos sainz jr #lando norris #lance stroll #lewis hamilton #premier league #bundesliga #grand prix

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elgaberino-mcoc · 2 years ago

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“with Spot, both the original tournament's final round contestants will be in the game [(Knull having been the first)]. [Hey] @daddeacon[, I] can't decide if it feels like yesterday or 84 years ago. Fun memories #TournamentOfBattlerealmFuture #MCOC #MarchAddness @MarvelChampions #MarvelChampions @MARCUSPACK16”

- Other Gabe

retweeting this

referencing this

Context: For a while, new additions to the MCOC Wishlist were only determined by tournaments on Twitter. Summoners on Twitter would vote who should win 1v1 matchups between different potential champs, i.e. Marvel characters, who were not yet listed on the MCOC Wishlist. This tradition was started by Wishlist creator Other MCOC Gabe, now simply known as Other Gabe, and UMCOC Podcast member UMCOC Deacon, who has also since changed his name, since UMCOC Podcast no longer exists. These tournaments were called Tournaments of Battlerealm Future. The first was nicknamed “March Addness” since it was about adding champs to the Wishlist and it occurred shortly after March Madness was cancelled due to COVID-19 in 2020. Spot went to the final round of the first tournament, qualifying him for a “spot” on the Wishlist. Marco, AKA MARCUSPACK16, is tagged because he was a huge community proponent of Spot before, during, and since the tournament.

#Spot #teleportation #villain #Spider Man rogue #Sinister Six #TournamentofBattlerealmFuture #MarchAddness #MARCUSPACK16 #umcocdeacon #MCOC Wishlist Other Gabe #dimensional being #2022 #October 2022 #spiderverse #legion of losers

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amandabe11man · 2 years ago

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was told earlier that our neighbor of 28 years (aka. my whole life pm) died yesterday and man.... it’s not like I personally hung out with him or anything, but him, his wife and my dad have always had a close correspondence. he was an old farmer, he’s helped us with so many things, and we’ve done favors for him as well. he was an animal lover too...

he was 84 and had COPD and he also had a heart attack this spring I think? so I guess it’s not that weird that way, but still. he’s been a constant presence for us every time we’ve been at dad’s place. it always felt safe and nice to know that him and his wife were always close-by. I don’t know what I'll feel next time I'm out there, but when I think about it now, it already feels empty and desolate. unsure..

they’ve talked about how his daughter would take over the farm after him, so I hope that turns out well too. still, though, he’ll be sorely missed. I've been thinking about it on and off ever since I heard it and now I'm crying (been on the verge for a while). like-- it wasn’t even that long ago that we worked alongside him and his (adult) children to harvest hay from a meadow that’s on his property. we had a deal with him that we could have the hay for our animals if we helped him with the harvest. we always had little deals like that with him... so yeah, some time last month was the last time I (personally) met him, and he seemed as usual then... hell, I ran into his wife just last week. it feels so weird and empty rn. since we first moved here when I was just 2-something years old, he’s literally always been around, and I haven’t known anything else...

rest in peace, neighbor Erik... thank you and we’ll miss you ❤️

#personal #ugh

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purplesurveys · 2 years ago

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1522

Have you ever written a song?: Just when I’ve had to do it for class. < Same, though I haven’t had to do this since like, grade school so it’s definitely been a while. I wouldn’t be interested in penning a song just on my own.

What was the last drink you had?: Coffee.

Do you ever feel numb?: I’m on autopilot at my job these days. I’ve stopped finding fulfillment from it for the most part and when faced with stressful situations I kind of just go into overdrive in a very dead way until it gets resolved, hahaha.

Which do you think would be scarier to experience, an avalanche or tsunami? : Both are horrific but tsunamis are realistically more likely to happen where I live so I’ll have to go with that.

Do you currently have a honey jar in your pantry?: We do. It was part of the company’s Christmas gift box last year.

Do you always find a silver lining in bad situations?: Yes, I give it a shot every time. I try to avoid being pessimistic.

Do you prefer being inside or outside?: It depends on the occasion. Like if I’m just relaxing, I like to stay indoors but have a great outside view. But if I’m having dinner or drinks with friends, I always push to get al fresco instead of being cooped up in the indoor area.

When did you last use a lighter or matches?: Few months ago when I lit a candle.

Do you think the ocean needs more exploring?: For sure. So little of it has been discovered.

Do you ever experience panic attacks?: I have, but they haven’t visited in a while.

Have you ever had to call 911 or your country's emergency number?: Nope.

What was the last conversation you had about?: I don’t remember lol but it was with my sister not too long ago. We were just talking about Agi having some excess #2 stuck near his butt so I asked her to help me take it out.

Are you doing okay?: I’m great as long as you don’t ask or remind me about work.

Do you know an Olivia?: Nopes.

Is there a past relationship/friendship you miss?: There isn’t.

Do you like mangoes?: Never liked it in any form. As a Filipino I feel like I have a responsibility to like mango to some extent hahaha but it’s just never worked out for me.

Last song you listened to?: My Universe by Coldplay and BTS was on as I was parking earlier tonight.

What do you believe in the most?: That there are other beings in the vast universe. Maybe they aren’t humans like us, maybe they look vastly different, but I believe we aren’t alone.

What was the last movie you watched and enjoyed?: My sister’s thesis film. It’s quite short, only a little short of 20 minutes; but knowing that she made it and put a lot of effort into it made me proud. And the film itself was great, too! Do you use captions when watching TV?: Yeah, for everything I watch it’s ideal to have subtitles even if I can understand the language. It’s easier for me to pick up information/remember scenes if I can read through them.

What was the last app you used?: YouTube. What's your most used app?: Probably Facebook.

What percentage is your phone battery on?: 84% the last time I checked, which was only a few minutes ago. I’m too lazy to confirm if it’s still the same but it most likely is.

Are there any recipes you'd like to try?: I mean I watched a menbosha-making vlog yesterday and ever since then I’ve been thinking about trying to make it on my own. Did you use Vine when it existed?: I never made a Vine but I sure as hell enjoyed the viral ones that came out. I still miss Vine and prefer it a lot more than TikTok, lol.

What decorations do you have in your bedroom?: Some portraits and a few posters are up on my wall. I also have a corkboard with a bunch of BTS knickknacks, and it’s situated right in front of my work station so it can sort of serve as an inspiration for me to keep going haha. Who is a celebrity you'd like to hang out with?: Jimin.

How many amusement parks have you visited?: Around two or three. Not a big fan of them.

Do you prefer chewy or crunchy textures more?: Crunchy.

What last broke your heart?: I follow a local NGO called Strays Worth Saving and the stories that come out of the page are always so devastating. Last night I shared a call for donation for this dog who was heartlessly stabbed but managed to survive.

What is happiness in your own words?: Feeling at peace with who and where you are.

Do you still live in the town you grew up in?: Yes. Are there any events coming up you're looking forward to?: We have a holiday this Friday so I’m pretty fucking stoked about the 4-day work week ahead.

What's the most random collection you've had or known someone to have?: I’ve never personally understood restaurant/hotel tissue collections (unused, of course) but Filipino parents LOVE to start one; hell, even my mom has one lol.

Are you currently wearing anything green?: Nope, I’m all maroon tonight.

Do you google your symptoms everytime there is something wrong?: Yeah, for reassurance. I try to avoid going the opposite route, i.e. Googling my symptoms and going straight to the conclusion that I’m close to death lol.

Have you or would you ever go see a psychic?: Nope.

Who is the strongest person you know?: My mom.

What's your go to Chinese food order?: Not really a big fan of Chinese food but I do like to get minced pork and eggplants.

When was the last time you visited family?: Last Sunday, as is our tradition. We didn’t do it today though since we had to run a few errands and I also booked a trip to a museum.

Do you currently feel restless?: A bit, which is usual on Sunday evenings. What is something you're naturally good at?: Writing.

Have you had coffee or tea today?: I’m currently having coffee.

What flower did you last see?: I can’t recall. What's your favorite fictional book?: Everyday by David Levithan.

#survey #surveys

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 4 years ago

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Diary of the Writing Raven; Birds of a Feather

For the 1100+ follower milestone, here is the next part of the cursed raven’s story!

This time, we revisit entries in Miss Raven’s diary. A familiar face assumes prominence on the stage--what role will he play in this story of ours?

Part 1 l Part 2 l Part 3 l Part 4

Day 47

I feel like I am being watched.

Uncle says I am just nervous and excited from the ceremony yesterday.

I am not so sure.

Day 48

I ran into that weirdo again today.

The weirdo is named Rook Hunt. He also calls himself the Hunter of Love...? I do not understand what that means.

He said that he will not be fooled again by Mon-sure Mastermind’s tricks again. He said he knows I am a bird, and he will chase me to the ends of Twisted Wonderland to see me in flight.

...Scary.

He shouts many strange words and chases me around. I managed to narrowly miss him by diving into the bushes. He was distracted by some students with animal ears--and I was able to run all the way home safely.

I suppose it is good to be curious, but...Mister Rook is too curious...!!

Why couldn’t I have run into Mister Jade instead?

Day 51

Uwaaah, I saw a very pretty upperclassman today! He had golden hair, violet at the ends.

The pretty upperclassman snapped at Mister Rook and told him to stop scaring me.

I am thankful, but...it seems like that upperclassman was scanning me all over. Judging me silently. I wanted to disappear into my clothes.

Before we part, he tells me that my ponytails are not symmetrical. He adjusts it for me and sends me off.

Mister Rook’s friends are strange people, too.

Day 56

Another run-in with Mister Rook. They seem to happen every day now, though they are not always...eventful.

He says I am too formal, and that I can just call him “Rook”.

He would not stop pestering me until I agreed.

He gave me a toothy grin when I, at last, relented.

What a troublesome man.

Day 57

Ever since I tried Flounder’s Blue, I have been sampling new foods and drinks.

Today, I got a cup of caw-fee.

Silly me, though...I tripped and spilled it all over a Savanaclaw student. He was so angry. He threatened to gobble me up.

I was trembling and sobbing when the Savanaclaw student yelped. Rook had a tight grip on his trail and kept tugging it, saying weird things until he scurried off.

I thank him.

Day 60

It feels like I see Rook around every corner. He does not always approach--sometimes, he is just content with watching from a distance, or he gives a small wave.

Jade has noticed too.

He asks if Rook makes me feel unsafe..

Rather than feel unsafe, I am a little curious as to why Rook is...well, Rook. He is certainly an odd fellow, but when I think back to a few days ago, I can’t help but think he has a good heart.

I do not think he means any harm.

So I tell Jade I am fine.

Day 66

Rook smelled funny today.

He says there was an accident in the Science Club, so he will reek of tomato and basil for a few days. That hunting trip he was planning is cancelled; the smell will alert too many animals of his presence.

I tell him that he reminds me of the pasta served at the Mostro Lounge, and he laughs.

How he is able to stay so cheery is a wonder to me--but it is not a bad thing, I suppose.

Day 72

Rook tells me of a carny-vale in the nearby town, and says I must experience it for myself. I was curious, so I followed.

There are so many bright sounds and sights. It smells like something fried and sweet.

We ride the spinning tea cups and the carousel. They make me feel like I’m flying once more.

I’m no good at any of the game booths, but Rook is. He has impeccable aim and strength. The game booth runners cry and beg him to not run them out of business.

Rook just smiles and asks them for their best prizes. He has no use for most of them, so he dumps his prizes onto me with a part on the head.

My arms are too full to hold any food, so Rook helps feed me. He stuffs funnel cake, cotton candy, and candied apple into my mouth.

The last thing we do for the day is the ferris wheel. We go up and up against the sunset.

In the dying light of day, I realize something.

Rook has very pretty eyes, too.

Day 80

The pretty upperclassman came up and introduced himself.

Vil Schoenheit, Pomefiore’s dorm leader.

The queen.

He remarks that my pigtails are not asymmetrical today, and that I am a fast learner.

“You must be, little Shetland potato,” Vil comments, “if you are to deal with my huntsman.”

Day 84

...Rook was carrying a Pomefiore boy over his shoulder, like a sack of potatoes.

He says that it’s his job to capture runaways, in service of his queen.

...I wonder how much he gets paid to do this?

Day 85

I told Rook about my hiking trip with Jade!

He seemed very interested, listening intently and nodding while I spoke.

Rook says that he, too, is a fan of the great outdoors, and that we should go on a camping trip together sometime.

I look forward to it.

Day 90

Today is the promised camping trip with Rook.

The weather is getting chillier, so he reminds me to dress warm. He will take care of the rest of the preparations. After all, he has had much more experience with these sorts of things.

I’m still cold, even when I show up in three layers. Rook tuts and throws his jacket over me, despite my protests.

He guides me through the forest, pointing out tiny things I would not have noticed on my own. That bunny’s burrow, those squirrels storing nuts for the upcoming winter, the rustle of the leaves, the trickle of water, how the sunlight filters through the trees...

Rook has such a poetic way of speaking.

He reminds me of a prince in a fairy tale.

Day 94

Rook told me that he has noticed that my speech has improved. He is proud, puffing up like a proud father. He spouts some nonsense about how “mon petit oiseau” (he helped me with the spelling) is becoming such a refined young lady.

I told him that his own manner of speech is far prettier than mine.

Rook just laughed and offered to help me improve more and more, if I wish.

I should pay a visit to Pomefiore, he said, and the queen will welcome me with open arms.

Day 95

Pomefiore is...beautiful. Violet tapestries, crimson curtains, and gold decorations dripping from every available crevice. And everyone is just as beautiful as their surroundings, skin like glass and eyes set in jewel-colored shadows.

I expected nothing less of the oldest dormitory at Night Raven College. The castle is steeped in years of history.

I was offered tea and a three tiered stand of snacks. Vil introduced me to a boy named Epel, who squirmed in his seat with discomfort.

He made us hold our tea cups all funny and barked at us to exchange words. Rook stands at his queen’s side and just...smiles at us as we suffer.

After that, Vil shepherded us to a large table, where two sets of cutlery were laid out.

I’m drilled for hours on end, until I can differentiate the several different variants of spoons, forks, and knives. Epel, too.

I am told to return every few days, to join Epel for his lessons. “It would do him some good to have someone to go through the motions with,” Vil insists. “It gives him some much needed...’encouragement’.”

More lessons for me.

...Somehow, I feel like Rook has me caught in a snare.

Day 100

Vil quips that we are learning ballroom dancing today.

I do not see the practical use of such a skill, but he will not take no for an answer.

Epel and I mutter apologies as we link hands and step on each other’s feet. Then the queen has us take turns spinning around with Rook.

He is very graceful on his feet--far more than myself or Epel. I’m nervous when my turn comes up, but Rook reassures me that it will be fine.

His arms form a cage to keep me from stumbling.

He clicks his tongue and says I need more practice.

Day 102

We focused on the arts today. Vil was busy with modeling (?) and told us that Rook would be our instructor. He says that the arts are his best subject, so please leave everything to him.

Rook shows us fruit bowls and pictures of scenery (he says he took the photographs himself)! Then he sets out canvases and paint sets and tells us to follow his lead.

His voice is a soft murmur as he beats his paintbrush against a blank canvas, breathing color into an otherwise lifeless world.

I do my best to do as he says.

Rook glances over--and he tells me, through a blinding smile, that my painting needs some work.

I have to agree.

Day 110

Epel is with friends today.

Rook takes this opportunity to grant me a language and writing lesson. He knows that I like writing, so now is as good of a time as any.

Rook hovers over me at a desk and suggests ways to make my writing sound...fancier.

I practice writing sentences like...

You are the light of my life, the lark’s birdsong in the still morning.

You are as lovely as the petals of a rose, lush and delicate and breathtakingly beautiful.

You are the moon and the starlight, twinkling in the depths of the darkness and guiding me to salvation.

I ask him what the point of these phrases were--and Rook answers, “For when you wish to woo whomever has captured your heart!” He makes it sound so easy.

He teaches me a few basic phrases of his flowery language, too.

I tell him merci.

Day 117

The queen puts books on my head and tells me to walk without dropping any of them.

Rook holds my hand and helps me keep balance.

It is warm, and comforting and supportive, just like Jade’s.

Then Vil whips out a pair of odd shoes, with stick-like things instead of a flat sole. He calls them heels and urges me to put them on.

I fall on my face, and Rook has to help me up.

On my second attempt, he catches me. He tells me I have the grace of a newborn fawn--that is to say, none at all.

Still, I feel safe in his arms.

Day 133

It is cold, and snowy.

Rook drags me outside anyway. He says exercise will do my frail little body some good.

But...no matter what I activity I do, I am miserable at it. Snowshoeing, ice skating, sledding. I am horrible at all of them, and more.

We settle for building a snowman.

I try to make it look cute.

Day 140

The cruise ship is boring. The beach is boring. It’s mostly older folks like Uncle sipping on tropical drinks and sunbathing.

I wish I had someone to talk to.

Of course, Jade would be nice and set my heart at ease...but Rook would be able to make even something as mundane as this fun.

I can already hear him shouting in my head about the clear blue waters, and the amber sunlight, and the snow white sand.

Look at me, I’m beginning to speak nonsense.

Well, nonsense it may be, but it is interesting nevertheless.

Rook is...interesting.

Day 149

There are lots of seagulls here.

...They remind me of Rook.

I am not quite sure why.

Maybe it is the incessant cawing.

Though...that is charming, in its own unique way.

Day 155

Rook brought back a souvenir from his home land--a bright blue feather on a beaded necklace. He says it is similar to the one the young prince of his country wears.

It turns out, he is from the Afterglow Savannah! What a surprise; I thought he would be from the Land of Pyroxene.

He regales me with stories of his adventures, of the many hunts he embarked on and his trophies.

His eyes are like emeralds, shining with excitement.

Day 167

I saw a play with Rook.

It told the story of two lovers whose families detested one another. The actors all speak quite frivolously, just like Rook. I can see why he would like this kind of thing.

My favorite part...it was the balcony scene.

The male lead cannot stand to be apart from the female lead, and so he sneaks into her garden at night. He summons her to the balcony and makes a vow that he will, no matter what, find a way to be with her.

...The play ends with death.

I cried a little, and Rook let me lean against his shoulder until I stopped.

Day 170

I penned a little story based on the play.

This one has a happy ending.

I want to put some hope into the world.

Day 185 (Continued)

I asked Rook if he was excited for Valentine’s Day, if he was expecting any gifts.

He gave me a mysterious smile in response and said, “Ah, that is for me to know and for you to find out, mon petit oiseau.”

I wonder what he means by that.

Day 186 (Continued)

I will give Rook some chocolate, too!

As thanks for being my friend.

Day 197 (Continued)

I made little heart-shaped bon-bons for Rook.

Perfect for the Hunter of Love.

Day 198 (Continued)

I want to curl up and die, diary.

Rook saw me crying today, under the shade of the great apple tree that towers in the school courtyard.

He asked me what was wrong, a concerned look on his face.

I snapped at him, told him to leave me be.

...But rather than bombard me with questions or annoy me with overly embellished words...

...Rook sat next to me silently. He held my hand until I stopped crying.

Then I spilled everything. I don’t know why I did. I...I guess I wanted someone to know of my story.

Starting with my arrival at Night Raven College. Ending with Jade’s betrayal.

I told Rook the tale through my tears and disgusting sobbing. It was absolutely pathetic, but...he listened patiently.

When I finished, he told me something.

“Mon petit oiseau, I would never lie to you.”

And I believe him.

Day 200

I cried again.

Stupid Leeches.

Day 202

I am scared of Jade.

I say as much to Rook.

He makes a joke about sharpening a harpoon and going eel hunting.

...At least, I think it is a joke.

Day 215

Rook now greets me as soon as my classes let out. His smile and laugh are reassuring to see.

He makes sure I get home safely, and without being accosted.

I cannot say merci enough.

Day 227

...It is ironic.

The man I once ran from is now the one I willingly go to for shelter, and the man I once went to for shelter is now the one I run from.

What a strange reversal of fortune.

Day 228

I feel eyes on me again.

...Leeches, most likely.

Day 230

Tomorrow is another day.

I will stay at Rook’s side.

It is the only place I feel safe beyond Uncle’s attic.

Day 231

I can trust him.

I can trust Rook.

He will tell an ugly truth right off the bat.

He values honesty, integrity--like me.

And birds of a feather must flock together.

#Rook Hunt #Jade Leech #Dire Crowley #Epel Felmier #Vil Schoenheit #twst #disney twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland #angst #PLEASE STOP READING A PERSON'S DIARY #Tale of the Cursed Raven #Raven Crowley #twst oc #twisted wonderland oc

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ssa-daddyhotchner · 4 years ago

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Undercover - Chapter 15

Chapter Selection

"What do we got now Garcia", I took at seat between Hotch and Morgan.

"Okay today we have a case in one Reno, Nevada. This is Henry Baxter he was found yesterday by some hikers." We all look at the crime scene photo and Morgan speaks up.

"What makes the police think this isn't just a murder." Reid takes a closer look at the details and makes the connection to a previous case. Garcia starts to speak but he cuts her off.

"This looks like a case from 25 years ago. There were bodies of abusive fathers, this unsub was active from 84 to 89. After that he just disappeared." Rossi had a look of realization.

"I remember that case Gideon and I worked on it. We got close to catching him but there was never another body. The FBI called us back to Quantico."

"We'll talk more about it on the jet, let's go." Everyone stands up and go for their go bags. I get into the SUV with Hotch, we leave first before the team. The drive was quiet, we did talk about the notes coming to the our house and my ex. What we would do and if I'd tell the team if the problem escalated.

We got out the car and walked to the jet going inside. I take a seat in the back by the window, Hotch sitting next me. "Sooo", he turned his attention from the case file. "Can you talk to Rossi about that trip, we all need one", a smile tugging at his lips. "I'll talk to him", I let out a small 'yay'.

Aaron glanced out the window, he didn't see anyone. He leaned forward and pressed a gentile kiss on my lips. We didn't notice the already present, Spencer and Rossi standing the aisle. Aaron and I looked at them awkwardly. "I've seen you do worse no need to feel embarrassed." Spencer sat down and I felt my face getting red hot. Slightly remembering the night in the back of Spencer's car.

The rest of the team got there not long after, we waited till the last half hour of the flight to go over the case again. "Ok so first start with the dumping grounds. He displaying them, setting them in an upright position", Rossi finished speaking.

"The stabbing and slicing is the outlet for sexual release. People that use a knife usually more introverted." Morgan stated, Garcia went on the tv.

"Ok there was just another body found an hour ago, I just got wind of it. What do you guys need from me." Garcia finished then Hotch started. "Garcia I need you to look for men that are 50-60 that have lived in the Reno area since the 80's."

"Look for that and any men between the age range that went to prison, he stopped killing for 26 years that doesn't just happen." JJ said while flipping through the case file. "Garcia I think that enough for now."

Garcia ended the call and Hotch stood up, "Rossi and Morgan go to the most recent crime scene. Emily an Reid go to the victims house, talk tot he families. Y/n, JJ, and I will go to precinct to set up."

Hotch went to the back of the plane to get a cup of coffee. I put my hand o his arm and turn to him, "Did you talk to Rossi." He finishes pouring his cup. "Yes", I smile and walk away to talk me seat.

The plane lands JJ, Hotch, and I all go to the precinct.

_____________________________

The case took about a week to solve; the unsub was Matthew Ford. He was in prison for 27 years due to attempt murder. We were on our way back on the jet, I was to the right of Aaron. We were on crowded in the center of the jet.

Morgan was talking to Emily, JJ to Reid. Aaron was doing paperwork, his hand sitting on my thigh rubbing small circles. I had my eyes closed trying to get rid of my headache. Rossi was sitting in front of me.

Aaron took out his phone and texted Rossi. He read the text and stared at him. I shrugged and he began talking.

"Its come to my attention that when I mentioned the vacation all of you took me serious", we all said yes. "So you all want me to pay for it."

I looked at Rossi, "Yeah so were we going. I really need this, you'll be helping all of us out. We're so stressed." I was somewhat over exaggerating. But we all did the vacation and Rossi has the money to do it. Hotch started talking, "Dave if it makes you feel better we can you this as an excuse to 'team bond'."

Rossi glanced at all of us, "Fine but I choose where we're going." Yays were spread throughout the jet. I feel like I needed this the most. My mind was constantly on my ex, Hayley, combined with the stress of the job and what happened with Carmine I was feeling overwhelmed.

Some nights I'd wake up covered in sweat and other I wouldn't be able to sleep at all. It was all still happening and made me feel useless. From the looks of it Aaron didn't have any problems with it.

We got back to Quantico and Rossi had already made the plans and the location.

"We're gonna go to Honolulu, surprisingly I've never been there. We leave at 8am and yes I bought your tickets but I expect to be paid back." Rossi stepped into his office and closed the door. Morgan, JJ, and Emily all gathered their stuff and went home to pack. I sat at my desk waiting for Aaron to finish the files that remained on his desk.

My eyelids were starting to get droopy and I put my head down. "Why don't you go home and get some sleep", I picked up my head and saw Spencer sitting at his desk. "I would but Hotch drove me, I that you went home."

"Nope, when we left for the case there were some files that still needed to be done. You know I don't like to leave things unfinished." I smiled a bit putting my head back down.

"So, how are you and Hotch?" I didn't look at him. "Fine I just wish he'd hurry up!" I mumbled slightly yelling the last part. Spencer was still talking to me but everything started to fade away.

I woke up to someone shaking my shoulder. Rossi stood above me, "Hotch told me to wake you up he's almost done." I nodded still tired and couldn't make out words. He walked through the glass doors and went home.

I stood up and stretched walking into Hotchs office, "I'm almost down give me 5 minutes."

"Ok", I mumbled rubbing my eyes and laying down on the couch. I felt drained but this time I couldn't go back to sleep. "Annnd done, ok we can go." I stood up from the couch and held my hand out. He grabbed it and we walked to the car.

Aaron got into the drivers seat and started the car. II got in and put my hand on his thigh. He looked down at the gesture, "Thought I was supposed to d that to you."

I giggled, "Deal with it." I squeezed his thigh and he was stifling a laugh.

When we got home I was somewhat awake and dropped all of my stuff off at the door dragging my way through the house and to the bed. I slummed down, not bothering to change my clothes, I still had to pack.

Aaron wrapped his arms around me and we drifted off.

_____________________

Aaron packed my things for me and we rushed out the door. We almost overslept and we sped to the airport. We made right before they closed the gate on us, Rossi had bought everyone first class tickets and we sat down. "What the hell took you so long", Emily looked back at us. I glanced at Aaron, "I overslept and Hotch had to bring Jack to Jessica's.

She turned back around and put on her head phones. Reid sat in the middle row reading a book, JJ and Morgan were talking a few rows ahead.

The flight was around 13 hours and they were spent looking out the window and reading. We got there around 9pm and went straight to the hotel. Rossi got everyone a separate room except for me and Hotch.

"Ok in the morning I wanna go to the beach. I need back my tan, can't get that in Virginia." Aaron chuckled in my ear as we were about to go to bed. "Ok sounds like a plan."

"Night."

"Night princess."

______________________

I woke up to a call, I didn't wake up and instead Aaron answered. It was Spencer, "Hey are you gonna come down or do I have to get you." Aaron didn't answer instead he hummed. "Okay fine sleep in", he hung up the phone.

Aaron nestled his face on my back and mumbled, "We gonna get up." I hummed in agreement. "Come on its 10:30am." That made me shoot my eyes open, I turned to look at him. "Alright come on."

We got changed putting on my black two piece, got some towels and snacks and headed for the beach. When we got there, the sun was blazing ahead. There were people lining the beach with umbrellas and food.

Aaron called the team while I took off towards the water, "Hey I finally got up. I met y/n at the beach. Are you guys coming?"

"Yeah we'll be there." Emily hung up the phone and she told everyone else to go to the beach. I was looking back at Aaron while he sat there looking slightly awkward. I dipped my whole body in the water getting my hair wet.

I walked out of the water and over to Aaron. I reached my hand out, "Do I have to beg you." A smirk formed on his lips, "Yeah you know what that'd be nice." I bent over and grabbed his hand pulling him up to me. "You're gonna go in the water. If you like it or not."

He moved his mouth to my ear, "You gonna make me." My breathing hitched, I looked over Hotchs shoulder and saw the team. "I could but that would mean I wouldn't be able to see this." The whole team rushed up behind his and started pushing his into the water dipping his head under.

When he came back up his hair was sticking to his forehead a bit. His body more specifically his chest was glistening in the sun from the water. He looked hot as hell. I just wanted to jump on him right there.

"Emily come here!", Morgan called out putting her on his shoulders. "Let go, come on y/n you think you can take this." I looked at the sight ahead of me and I started to laugh. "Yes I think I can take that." I brought Aaron over to me getting on his shoulders. His hands squeezing my thighs keeping me on.

The guys practically charged at each other. My arms going out and almost knocking them down. Emily dipped to the side blocking the shove. I came back strong no pushing her off but made her back up enough so she fell of herself.

Her body crashing into the water and Aaron and I brought our hands to the air and getting a well deserved high five. "Aww there always next time Derek." I was laughing; I was still on Aaron shoulders we didn't even notice we were still holding on to each other till Spence pointed it out.

He swam over to us, "Y/n just staying you might wanna get down cause there starting to look at you." My eyes went wide and I hopped off. I dragged Aaron under the water will me placing a kiss on his lips before we went back up for air.

There were two people I still hadn't seen. JJ and Rossi were staying on the beach under the umbrella they had brought.

We were at the beach for about 4 hours. "I'm going to head back; you guys be free to do what you want." Dave called out walking away. "You guys wanna grab drinks", JJ, Emily and Spencer all raised there hands. They stood there staring at Aaron and I.

Don't look at me like that, last time I got drunk the day was like hell. I'm willing but only tomorrow not tonight I wanna at last enjoys a few days." They nodded looking at Aaron.

"I think I just grab some food and go tot sleep; maybe talk to Jack a bit." They understood and walked away. As we were walking to the street and to the hotel I spoke. "What are the plans for tonight cause I'm not letting you do that." I grabbed my hand and we headed for the hotel.

"Well I'm thinking that tonight we head out." He stopped talking and left it at that. "Annnd?" He shook his head, "It's a surprise."

"Ok fine hope it's worth it." When we got to the hotel my hair was dry but smelled like the ocean. I got undressed and hopped in the shower. Aaron followed after me; both of us washing off the salt water from our hair and bodies.

We got out and ordered some food Aaron went out to get it form the restaurant. He brought it back and we ate. He put on tv and I fell asleep from the day in the sun. I was curled up on the couch and Aaron carried me to the bed laying me down.

He covered me with the blanket. He set and alarm for 3am seeing as it was only 8pm when I fell asleep I'd get a decent amount of sleep. Aaron wasn't tired yet so he stayed on his phone scrolling through. He called Jack and he told him about his day at school and about the homework he had to do.

_____________________________

I woke up and it was 12:30am I turned off the alarm I know that he set. I sat up against the headboard with me head in my hands slowly waking up. I felt a hand creep up my hand, I glanced over and I felt Aaron start stir. "You up?", he mumbled something but I couldn't hear him.

"What was that?", I was smiling to my self. "I said yea baby. Can you get dressed so we can go." I nodded even though he couldn't see it. Getting up I put on a pair was sweatpants and a white crop with flip flops. Aaron stood and threw on some clothes and we left.

Aaron still didn't tell me where we were going so I followed next to him. After about an hour of walking I finally gave in, "Ok where the hell are we going." I said through an annoyed laugh.

"Alright close your eyes", I covered my eyes and reached out for his hand so I knew where to go. We walked for a about 10 more minutes. I heard a gentile fall and stream of water. It was running down on what seemed like the rocks and grass below.

The air started to smell damp and I heard the crushing of water rushing. I had a feeling of where he brought me. I had mentioned it to him a few moths ago.

"Open them." I uncovered my face and I was right. There was waterfall right in front of me. It was running off of a cliff at least 100ft high. There was pool at the bottom where the water crowded and flowed to different streams. The moon reflecting off of the crystal blue water.

I looked up and the full moon was shining brightly. I lit up everything below, the stars danced in the sky along side it. "How'd I do", He said gazing do at me. When I turned to look at him the moon was shining in his eyes at the right angle making them look like pool of honey.

"Honey you did great", I was smiling through my teeth as I swung my arms around his neck.

"You know what we have to do now right", I knew what he was thinking. "Okay maybe not all that, I know what you wanna do and you're a hell of a lot more confident that I am in that aspect. I'm not doing it."

"Awe come on it'll be great and you know it." He started undressing and stepping into the water.

"Come on it'll be quick", I nodded he grinned sitting on the edge waiting for me to get in more. As he fully submerged he pulled me onto his lap. I was giggling till he pressed our lips together; his hand going directly on my hips.

My hands snaked up his chest to the back off neck. The warm water around us, waving around; set us in the mood even more. He started to move the hands that were on my hip and slowly grinded me on his growing bulge.

He moved his hands and pulled off my underwear and threw them out the water. I moved his boxers down; he rose to pull his cock our. It stood up, my pussy going around it still grinding. "Stop teasing me little girl." He lifted my up and put his tip in my pussy letting me adjust.

I started to bounce up and down on his cock. I held on to his broad shoulders keeping my balance. "God damn y/n", he groaned out. My edge slowly approaching. I clenched around him making him feel every inch of his thrusts.

My breathing started to falter, "Aar-." I was growing tired of bouncing and Aaron hands returned to my hips assisting me. He lifted me up before slamming me down on his dick. He hit my g spot repeatedly. I took his hand off my hip and brought it to my clit.

I was full of pleasure and the look of us in the blue water, the mist from the waterfall, and the way the moon was reflecting of him made him look like and actual fucking god.

I moved my hands from his shoulders to his neck and into his hair. Grabbing tightly on his hair and pulling his head back to look up at me. I smile formed on his face. I dipped my head down and littered his neck with kisses.

Forming small hickys along his jaw. “Fuck y/n”, he groaned out getting closer to his orgasm.

I could feel him twitching inside me, "Cum for me." I released around his and I could feel him fill me up. We stayed there catching our breath, "We should probably move before someone sees us." He laughed into my neck and pulled out.

It was 5am, "We should head back." we got out of the poll of water and grabbed our clothes; we headed back to the hotel.

__________________

@mac99martin @appleblossoms-posts @donttellanyoneireadfanfiction @oreogutz @marie1115 @wanniiieeee

#aaron #aaron hotchner #Aaron Hotch Hotchner #aaron hotch fanfiction #aaron hotchner x reader #hotchner #Thomas Gibson #hotch #SSA HOTCHNER #aaron hotchner smut

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bobfloydsbabe · 3 years ago

Text

Fic Writer Tag Game

I was tagged by the ever-lovely @darknightfrombeyond to do the Fic Writer Tag Game. Thank you, darling.

How many works do you have on AO3?

Three across both my accounts. I used to have a lot more on one of them, but I went through a period of wanting to destroy everything I'd ever created, so I binned most of my works.

What’s your total AO3 word count?

It's like 8(ish)k across both accounts.

How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

Teen Wolf, MCU, Riverdale and Bridgerton, though only the first and last are on AO3.

What are your top five fics by kudos?

'The Queen and The Knight', but that's because I deleted all the other ones. It's a one-shot, so the fact that it has 110 kudos is pretty neat.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to, but ADHD makes me forget. I will go back a reread them, though, if I'm feeling unmotivated.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Bold of you to assume I've ever finished anything *cough* ADHD *cough*

Do you write crossovers? If so, what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Nope. I can barely keep track of one plot/storyline.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Haven't we all?

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

No. I tried once, but it was just awkward and clumsy. It was years ago, though, and my writing has improved significantly, so maybe I'll give it a go again. I definitely want Cracks of Light to have hints of smut.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of. I almost accused someone of stealing an oc/fic idea once, but then I got off my high horse and realized I don't exactly have a monopoly on names/ideas/face claims. We're all creative people, especially within the OC community.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! A reader contacted me to ask if they could translate a one-shot of mine into Russian, promising they would provide me with full credits and send me a link once it was posted to a Russian fic website. I said they could, and it was incredible. I wish I still had the link.

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Depends on the fandom. Although, I will say that my tag for Stiles and Lydia was 'otp of all otps', probably them.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

All of them? For real, though, I don't think I'll ever finish Of Blood and Bones no matter how much I want to. Once Teen Wolf stopped airing, I lost interest.

What are your writing strengths? What are your writing weaknesses?

I consider writing humor a strength of mine, and I don't think I could ever write something without an element of humor. Action is definitely my main weakness but remembering to make people do things while they speak. 84 lines of pure dialogue is not good writing, but it's damn tempting.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I think I'm the wrong person to answer this question as English is my second language. If it's necessary, try to verify it with a native speaker if you can.

What was the first fandom you’ve written for?

We don't talk about that. I was 13 at the time, and I refuse to give this information up.

What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written?

Right now, it's tied between Shadows and Cracks of Light. Shadows is my baby. My lovechild, if you will. It's the fic that got me out of a writing slump but then later put me back in one. Cracks of Light is my newest fic (I only posted chapter 1 yesterday), but I love it. It's my most well-written, thought out, well-paced story to date. I have a clear grasp of the characters, their stories, and where I ultimately want to take it. I'm proud of it.

I won't tag anyone because I think @darknightfrombeyond tagged everyone. Lots of love!

#tag game #fic writer tag game #this was fun #I have admitted to dark things #like having two ao3 accounts #and deleting everything in a fit of self-sabotage

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glass-tablegirlss · 3 years ago

Note

1-92 PLEASE Queen 😩😩😩

1:When did you lose your virginity?

When I was 15. Unfortunately my first time wasn’t my choice.

2: Rough sex or soft sex?

Rough

3: Do you have any unusual kinks/fetishes?

Yes, plenty 👀

4: Weirdest place you’ve had sex?

Under a boat

5: Favourite sex position?

Doggy

6: Do you like to be dominant or submissive?

Submissive

7: Have you ever had any one night stands?

Yes, a few

8: Sex on the bed, couch or the floor?

Depends, but floor or bed. So much room for activities

9: Have you ever had sex in a public place?

Yes

10: Have you ever been caught masturbating?

Yes lmao it was never spoken about though

11: What does your favourite sexy underwear look like?

Sheer black floral lace with bits of gold lace

12: How often do you have sex?

It’s been so long 😅

13: Is there anybody right now you’d like to have sex with?

Yessirrrr

14: Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex?

Giving

15: Most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you during sex?

Already answered, scroll down

16: A song you’d listen to during hard/rough/kinky sex?

Anything by The Weeknd

17: A song you’d listen to during soft/slow/passionate sex?

Anything by The Weeknd

18: Are you into dressing up for sex?

Absolutely

19: Would you prefer sex in the bath or sex in the shower?

Shower

20: If you could have sex with anyone right now, who would it be?

🤭🤭

21: Have you ever had a threesome? If not, would you?

I haven’t but I want to

22: Do you/would you use sex toys?

Absolutely, I do. They take everything to the next level.

23: Have you ever sent someone a dirty text/picture?

Yessir

24: Would you have sex with your best friend?

I have before, ruined the friendship so I wouldn’t do it again

25: Is there anything you do after sex? (for example, smoke, eat, drink)

Sit in orgasm bliss for about 30 mins

26: Something that will never fail to get you horny?

Kissing really passionately

27: Early morning sex or late night sex?

Late night

28: Favourite body part on the opposite sex?

Eyes

29: Favourite body part on the same sex?

Eyes

30: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find:

31: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you:

I’d have to think more on this 🤣

32: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?]

Yes 🤤 I’m delicious

33: Is it ever okay to not use a condom:

Yes if it’s consensual from everyone involved.

34: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience:

Alcoholic whipped cream

35: Worst possible time to get horny:

At work

36: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans?

YESSSS

37: How much fapping is too much fapping:

If it gets in the way of everyday life

38: Best sexual complement you ever got:

I’ve gotten a lot 🤭

39: Favorite foreplay activities:

Bring mentally and physically dominated to the point where I give up control and feel safe with what they have planned for me

40: What do you wear to bed?

Big t shirt or little tank top dress

41: When was the first time you masturbated:

I don’t even remember, I was youngggg though

42: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself?

Yes

43: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside?

Yes, years ago on a boat

44: Have/would you ever have sex in public?

Yes, I would

45: Have/would you ever had a threesome?

I haven’t but I definitely want to

46: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate?

??? I’ve used my hands and toys?!

47: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not?

Fuck yes

48: Do you like oral sex? (why/why not)

Absolutely

49: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in?

I love tattoos

50: How would you feel about taking someones virginity?

I’d rather not

51: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter?

Spicy food 🤣

52: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute?

Nothing against either

53: Do you watch porn?

Yes

54: Have you ever been called a freak? Why?

Yes, idk it’s just the way I am 🤪

55: Do you feel comfortable going “commando”?

Yessir

56: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn’t shaved their pubic hair?

It’s natural, no one should have a problem with it

57: If you could give yourself head, would you?

Lmfaooo idk?!?

58: Booty or Boobs?

Both

59: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?)

Yes when I was super young and stupid

60: If you were the other sex for a day, what are five things you would do?

61: have you ever watched someone masturbate?

Yes

62: has anyone ever watched you masturbate?

Yes

63. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed?

I don’t have a peeeen

64. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate)

Toys, clitoral

65. What is your bra/penis size?

34DD

66. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus?

A penis LOL

67. When was the last time you masturbated?

Yesterday

68. When was the last time you had sex?

Forever ago 😅 I don’t see the point unless I’m in love with the person. I can do better by myself.

69. When was the last time you watched porn?

Yesterday

70. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do?

Yes,

71. Guys:Circumsized?

I’m a girl :)

72. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched?

My neck

73. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched?

I have one genital part??

74. Girls:Are you able to achieve orgasm just through breast stimulation?

Hmmm I haven’t tried tbh

75. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr?

No I haven’t

76. When was the last time you have had a wet dream?

A few weeks ago, I really can’t remember

77. Which wet dream was your favorite?

OOO I had a dream about The Weeknd, was unreal.

78. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with?

No I like my friends purely as friends

79. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with?

Probably a few LOL

80. Favorite sexual position?

From behind

81. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed?

BOTH and more

82. Are you into any BDSM?

Yes

83. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldnt for any reason? Why?

Probably, not positive though.

84. Do you like dirty talk?

Absolutely

85. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation?

Loud

86. Have you ever been inturrepted during sex or masturbation? Who/what?

Yes, by ex’s parents hahaha

87. What kind of porn do you like to watch?

BDSM, domination, threesum

88. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them?

Yesssirrr 🤭

89. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn’t there when you needed them?

Absolutely, who hasn’t?!

90. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them?

I have. Not in contact with them anymore.

91. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial?

Yes I have previously, they’re not beneficial anymore

92. Ask whatever you want

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hoboal87 · 4 years ago

Text

Elastic Heart Chapter Seven

Title: Elastic Heart - The Fight

Characters: Y/N Y/L/N, Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, OFCs

Pairing(s): Sam x Reader

Summary: Y/N and Sam continue to see each other despite John's warning.

Word Count: 7k

Warnings: Cursing, angst, implied smut, pregnancy, talk of abortion, John Winchester is a bad parent, parents are assholes.

Notes: Series will be mostly canon compliant, taking place during season 8/9. Also, for purposes of this fic Sam was born in '84 instead of '83.

AN 2: This was oringally part of chapter 6, but I (along with my beta) decided it would be best to have it as a stand-alone.

Beta'd by @deanwinchesterswitch

Please give a comment or reblog and let me know what you think!

Elastic Heart Masterlist

Read Chapter Six

Chapter Seven: The Fight

May 2003

Y/N POV

When Sam shows me his acceptance letter, I burst into tears. A mixture of happiness and sadness consume me. I know it’s his dream, it’s his chance to get away from his dad, but a part of me selfishly wants him to stay longer. I get my acceptance into the university thirty minutes away the next day, mom and dad insisting it’s the right one for me. I still plan on taking the following year off, but I have yet to inform them of my plan.

The day before graduation, I’m on the floor of the bathroom for the fourth morning in a row, emptying the contents of my stomach. I chalk it up to nerves, Sam leaving in less than a week, finals and graduation. I feel a cold towel on the back of my neck, and turn my head to see mom behind me, trying her best to soothe me as I fight the urge to vomit again.

“Honey,” she says, rubbing my back, “maybe we should take you to the doctor?”

“Mom,” I offer weakly, knowing all the color has drained from my face. “I’m fine. I think it’s just a stomach bug. I don’t even have a fever.”

“Either way, you’re staying home today, I’m gonna call the school.”

“Mom,” I try to protest, dry heaving over the toilet. “It’s the last day, no one’s gonna believe that I’m sick.”

“It doesn’t matter, Y/N. It’s only a half-day, your teachers will understand. The ceremony is tomorrow, and you need to keep up your strength, your father and I would hate it if you couldn’t go.”

I try to stop her, but she’s already out the door, and I can hear the muffled sounds of her calling the school. I gather myself and head back to my bedroom. I crawl into my bed, pulling the covers over my head and sleep for hours. I wake up late in the afternoon, feeling slightly better. My eyes focus on the framed photo on my bedside table; a present Sam had given me weeks earlier on what he called our six-month anniversary. I smile, thinking about how he sheepishly explained that it had been six-months since we had met. It was from one of our first dates, nearly ruined when I got my period. It suddenly dawns on me. Shit.

I hop out of bed, making my way to the desk where my day planner sits. I frantically open it to the beginning of the month, looking for the subtle stars that I would have put on the pages, nothing. I go back another month scanning the pages desperately, assignments, and the occasional date with Sam being the only thing written on them.

“Has it been since March?” I whisper to myself as I count the weeks. “You cannot be this girl, Y/N. Ten Weeks.” I cover my face with my hands, thinking back. Spring Break. “Shit.”

“Y/N? Everything okay?” Mom calls from outside my room, perhaps I’m not being as quiet as I thought. “You feeling any better?”

“Yeah, mom, I just…” I open the door to come face to face with her; concern etched on her face. “I think I’m gonna go for a walk, get some fresh air.”

“Would you like me to go with you?”

“No, I won't be gone long,” I say, grabbing my wallet as discreetly as I can, heading downstairs and out the front door. I make my way to the drug store, praying that I’m wrong, we’d been so careful. The chime of a bell pulls me out of my head as I enter the store. I feel a sense of relief as I look around, noticing that the store’s empty besides the pharmacist behind the counter. He’s new to Weldon, and I rejoice knowing he won’t recognize me, smiling at me as I walk past him.

I stand in front of the row of tests, I hear the chime again, bringing my attention to the door, and I begin to panic as I recognize one of my classmates. I grab a test and make my way to the counter, quickly paying. I rush home, run into my bathroom, and tear the box open, carefully reading the instructions. I slip back into my room, quietly shutting the door behind me, and sit on my bed watching as my clock slowly passes the time. I take a deep breath as I compare the stick to the box. Positive. Crap, crap, crap. I throw the box and instructions away, keeping the test, willing it with all my might to change. If anything, the pink plus becomes more dominant, taunting me.

I stare at the test in my hands, unsure of what my next move should be. How am I gonna tell Sam? What about Stanford? I’m unable to stop the tears from flowing.

“Honey, are you sure you’re okay?” I hear mom’s voice on the other side of the door. “Maybe you shouldn’t go out, you should-” she opens the door just enough to walk in. She stops in front of me, and I can hear the concern laced in her voice. “What’s wrong?” I know I look a mess, face blotched, and eyes puffy. I grip the test tighter in my hands and shake my head. “Y/N, whatever it is, you can tell me.”

“You’ll hate me,” I whisper, not looking up. “I can’t-”

“Y/N, I could never hate you.” She closes the door behind her. “You’re my daughter, and I love you.”

I open my hands slowly, revealing the test to her. It takes her a moment as she takes a step closer, taking it out of my hands.

“Oh, Y/N,” she whispers, handing it back to me. "How— how did this happen?"

"I'm sorry.” I choke out through sobs, “We didn’t mean to. I— I—”

“Shh..” she sits down next to me and wraps her arms around me, placing a kiss on my head; I’m prepared for yelling, not this. She holds me against her as sobs leave me uncontrollably. “Sam?”

"I thought we were careful. It-It was an accident."

"What was an accident?" Dad says as he walks by my room, "Sarah, Y/N?” He looks between us. I open my mouth to speak, but all that comes out is another sob. His eyebrows furrow at the sight in front of him. “What's going on? What's wrong?"

"Rob, you should sit," I feel the bed dip for a moment as mom steps away from me, and guides dad to a chair in the corner of my room. She gestures to me to move towards the end of my bed, so we’re both facing him. "I want you to stay calm, okay?" He nods reluctantly. "Don't jump to any conclusions, Y/N is going to need you," Dad’s jaw clenches and his breathing becomes heavier as he prepares himself for what mom is about to tell him. “Y/N is..” mom’s own voice is shaky, she takes a deep breath, “pregnant."

All the worry and confusion on dad’s face immediately fades away. His face grows red, his brow furrows, and his breathing becomes rapid. He stands up quickly, pacing the floor of my bedroom. He’s silent as I continue to cry, my shame and embarrassment consuming me.

“Sam,” he rasps, unable to look at me. “He- he took advantage of you.” I can see a vein throbbing in his neck,

“Rob. Y/N’s old enough-”

“That boy is over 18, Y/N is a minor… I should go down to the sheriff’s office right now and—"

“Daddy, no!” I cry, trying to reason with him, “Sam, he didn’t- he didn't do anything to me. It’s not his fault.”

“Like hell, it isn’t!” He continues pacing in front of me, mom grabs at his shoulder, trying to get him to sit back down. “He’s clearly been conditioning you ever since the attack. He made sure that you thought he was your savior so that you would do anything for him."

"Rob, calm down, this isn't good for Y/N, what’s done is done, and there’s nothing we can do about it. Y/N and Sam, they’ll have to deal with the consequences."

"No, Sarah. We told her that boy was bad news. Now Y/N's in trouble." He turns to face me. "You aren’t having that baby,” he says sternly.

"Dad,” I barely muster, “you can’t. Please.”

“Rob, let’s talk about this.” Mom tries to argue, “maybe we should-”

“You’re not having it.” He points at me, “and you’re not going to see that boy again." Dad leaves my room; mom quickly follows him.

For the rest of the night, I hear muffled arguing. I fall asleep, still clutching the test in my hands. When I wake up in the morning, dad doesn’t speak or even look at me. As I sit down at the table, he immediately leaves, and I want to break down. Mom offers a sad smile, eyes puffy, and red. She runs her hand down my back, leaning forward to press a kiss to my forehead. “We’ll get through this, Y/N.”

When we arrive at the school the next day, I search the hallways for Sam. I find him standing outside the auditorium watching as parents file in. 'You can do this, Y/N.' I'm about to touch his shoulder when he turns around, widely smiling when he sees me standing behind him. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me into a tight hug.

"Missed you yesterday," he says, placing a kiss on my cheek. "Your mom said you were sick." My whole body stiffens, and I take a shuddering breath. He pulls away from me slightly, noticing my blotchy face, and the tears I'm trying to fight. "Y/N/N, what's wrong?" I shake my head and look down at the floor, not ready to say the words. “You're scaring me. It can't be that bad, talk to me, baby."

"It is that bad," I whisper, bringing my eyes up to meet his face. “I- I thought it was stress, or a bug or something. Then I realized, it’s been weeks.”

“Y/N/N.” His eyes search my face, trying to make sense of what I’m telling him. “Weeks since what? What are you trying to say?”

A shattered exhale leaves me, “I’m pregnant.”

All the color drains his face, "No, you can’t be,” he shakes his head. “We always use protection."

“Spring Break?” I mutter, choking back the lump in my throat, using all my might to not break down in front of him.

“That was over two months ago.” Sam paces in front of me, stopping when he catches sight of me. “You’re sure?”

I chew on my bottom lip, nodding my head.

"Why didn't you say something sooner?" he asks, running his hands through his hair, apparent concern lacing his voice. “I would have been there with you.”

"’M sorry,” my voice cracks, “I didn’t know. This is my fault. I should’ve-”

"No, Y/N/N, this is not on you. It takes two, and I should’ve—we both should have been more careful," he says, pulling me back into a hug, holding me as I sob into his chest. We stay like that for a few minutes; I can hear him sniffling and feel his hands leave me for a moment to wipe his eyes. He lets me calm down before speaking again. "What do you want to do?"

"Dad wants me to get rid of it," I say against him.

"Your dad doesn’t get to make that decision,” he says firmly. “What do you want, Y/N/N?"

"I don’t know.” I was still processing everything. I haven’t even thought about what I’m going to do. Neither mom nor dad asked me what I wanted. All I can think about are our futures, how badly we both want to get away from our families. Now, it doesn’t seem like a possibility. I can’t get rid of the baby; it’s Sam and me.”I want to have it," I pull away, my eyes fixated on the ground, “but if you don’t—"

He stops me, softly cupping my face and guiding it up until our eyes meet and then smiles warmly. “Y/N/N, I love you so much, and this,” he splays a hand gently over my stomach, "is our baby. If you want to keep it, Y/N/N, I'm here."

"What about Stanford?" I ask softly, it is his dream, and as much as I don’t want him gone, I don’t want him to feel forced into staying.”You’ve worked so hard.”

“Come with me,” he says, taking my hands in his. “You, me, and the baby. We’ll go to California; it’ll be the fresh start we’ve both always wanted.” A glimmer of hope wells up inside me, and I smile. “Away from our parents, everyone who knows us, we can do whatever we want.”

“Don’t say something you don’t mean.”

“I mean it, more than anything. I love you, no matter what. I think we can do this, together, I’ll figure everything else out. Take a few days, I still have to tell my dad about Stanford, and I’ll tell him about the baby too.” I can’t believe what he’s saying. “I’m leaving on Monday, and I want you to come with me.”

“You don’t have to do this, Sam,” I look back down at the ground, “this can be your out.” John’s words from months ago replay in my head. “I’m just some girl from a town you were working a case. I was never gonna leave this place. You can tell me the truth. If you don’t ever want to see me again, I’ll understand. I don’t want you to think I’m trying to trap you.”

“I love you. And I’m gonna love our baby so much. Monday, at 7 a.m., I’ll be waiting for you.”

Sam POV

Sunday comes quicker than I expect it to. Dad wants to leave the night of graduation, just like he threatened, but I convince him to wait out the weekend. He and Dean had been working back-to-back hunts for the last month, and though neither of them will ever admit it, they’re exhausted. I already quit my job at the grocery store and I use the little money I have saved to buy a ring from the pawn shop—a simple gold band with a small square-cut diamond. One day I’ll get Y/N/N the ring she deserves. With Dean in town, I know I can easily get into the bars and earn some extra cash for the trip. Dean’s always been the better player, but I need to get as much as I can, for Y/N/N and the baby.

I should have proposed the moment she told me about the baby, but it would have seemed forced. I don’t want her to think that the only reason I want to marry her is that she is pregnant. I want her with me; I want her to be my family.

There is only one hitch in my plan; Y/N/N’s parents. At seventeen, we would still need her parents’ consent to be married. Not only will I need their permission, but I also need their blessing. ‘They’re very old-fashioned.’ Y/N’s voice rings in my ear. They never quite warmed up to me, only tolerating my presence when necessary. That will have to change now; I’m the father of their grandchild, I’m going to marry their daughter.

Dean and dad are out, so I pull out a button-down from the back of my closet. I haven’t worn it since Valentine’s Day, but it’s the nicest piece of clothing that I own. I lift my pillow, inspecting the ring once more before putting it in my pocket. I pull up to Y/N/N’s house and notice a dim light coming from her window. I take a brief moment, calming myself before walking up to her front door. I knock and pace in front of the door, reminding myself to breathe. I hear grunts on the other side before the door swings open.

“You’ve got some nerve showing up here, Sam,” Y/N/N’s father appears in front of me.

“Sir, I want to talk to you about Y/N/N,” I say, trying to keep myself calm as I see the growing anger on his face.

“You took advantage of Y/N, and now she’s in trouble.”

“I didn’t-” I take another deep breath. He can’t possibly believe that; I have to make him understand. “I love Y/N/N, and I take full responsibility for what happened. Y/N/N and I-"

“There is no you and Y/N,” he snaps. “You stay away from my daughter."

"I’m sorry, Mr. Y/L/N, but I can’t do that. Y/N/N's carrying my baby, and I want to be with her, forever." I scramble for the ring in my pocket. I open the box to show it to him. “I want to do the right thing, sir, I want to marry her.”

"That’s not going to happen, Sam," he says, dismissing the ring and stepping out from the doorway and onto the porch. "You ruined Y/N's life, and she wants nothing more to do with you. She’s spent the last three days broken up over everything, Everything she’s worked so hard for, it’s all gone down the drain, thanks to your foolish behavior. She’s asked her mother to make her an appointment at the women’s clinic, and then this will all be over. You can go back to your own life, and Y/N can go back to the plan we made. There will be no baby.”

“No,” I whisper, “She said… she can’t.” She said she wanted to keep it, what changed? “Please, Mr. Y/L/N, let me talk to her.”

"She can, and she’s going to. You will not be talking to her anytime soon. Don’t you think I know what you’ve been up to? The only reason her mother and I allowed you two to date was because Y/N begged us. She told us you were a good person, and I’ll admit you had me fooled. I know you've been conditioning her ever since the attack, making her reliant on you. You’re lucky I haven’t gotten the sheriff to arrest you, stay away from our family.”

"Sir, please. I- I have never done anything to hurt your daughter. Please, can I have five minutes with her?" I’m desperate. I need to talk to her. I need her to know that I’m here.

“No. Y/N has already made her decision, and we will not allow you to talk her out of it. She doesn’t want to see you again.”

“Please, leave our family alone,” Y/N’s mother says, appearing behind her husband. “Haven’t you done enough damage? We all want what’s best for Y/N; as soon as all this is over, we’re moving. This is too much for her.”

“Please, I love your daughter. I want to marry her, that’s why I’m here.” I show the ring to her mother. “To ask for your blessing and your permission, she and I can do this. Please, just let me see her,” I beg them. “Please.”

“She’s resting.” Her father sighs, taking the ring from his wife’s hands and handing it back to me. “Sam, this was a difficult decision for Y/N, and she didn’t come to it lightly. You should go.”

I leave the house, defeated. I know she wouldn’t have made that decision without me. If it’s what she wants, really wants, then I can understand, but I still want her with me, baby or no baby. I have to hope that she’ll show up tomorrow morning. She has to.

Pulling back into the motel parking lot, I spot dad’s truck, but the Impala is nowhere to be found. A part of me is happy that Dean isn’t here; there’s no way I can tell both dad and Dean about Stanford and the baby. It’s going to be hard enough to tell dad about Stanford, but having to also tell him about Y/N/N, and admitting he was right about us, that scares the crap out of me. He had made it clear that he thought she was too young, and that we were getting too serious, too fast.

The ring box sits in the center of the bench; I can’t bring it back inside, not until I talk to dad. I take a couple of deep breaths, calming myself before exiting the car. Maybe once he learns I got a full-ride, he’ll understand, it’s only four years. I pull my key out, slowly unlocking the door as I prepare myself for whatever may happen next.

“Hey, Sam,” Dad’s walking between the dresser and the spare bed, packing his duffle bag, whistling as he takes in my appearance. “A little dressed up for hustling, don’t you think?” He laughs as my cheeks burn. “How’d it go? Make any money? Swindle some college kid out of his trust fund? Or maybe you got some old bat to leave you her fortune, set us up for life?”

I laugh uneasily, setting my keys and phone down, dreading what I’m about to tell him. I rarely see him in a mood like this, I huff, struggling to find my words.

“C’mon, Sam, you know I’m just fuckin’ with you.” He zips the bag up and sets it on the floor. “You say good-bye to Y/N yet? Don’t drag it out; it'll only make things worse.”

“I—”

“It’s for the best Sam. Maybe in a few years, after we finish the job, you can come back and see her again. She’ll probably be married, have a gaggle of kids running around.” My heart stops beating at the mention of kids. I know what he’s doing; he wants me to be ready for her to move on, he still thinks I’m going with him and Dean. “She’ll probably just get her M.R.S. degree while at college.”

“Dad,” I stop him. “I- I have to tell you something. Why don’t you sit?”

“Oh-kay.” He’s confused but complies, sitting on the edge of the bed, “What’s going on, Sam?”

I pace in front of him. ‘Stanford first. Then Y/N and the baby.’ I know he isn’t going to like anything I’m about to tell him. I look down at the dark green carpet of the room, never having paid attention to it before. I look back to dad, concern, and impatience etched on his face. I’m leaving in the morning; I can’t have them both in the dark, tell him.

“IwasacceptedintoStanford,” I blurt out. He furrows his brow, and I realize he didn’t understand me. I take a deep breath, preparing myself to say it again, this time more deliberately. “I was accepted into Stanford, full-ride,” I say clearly, “and I’m going. There’s early admission, and I have to be there in a few weeks.”

“S-Stanford?” He says in disbelief, a small smile forms before he shakes it off, hardening his face. “Sam, we talked about this. There’s no reason for you to go to college. Your brother and me, we need you.”

“It’s what I want, dad,” I say calmly. “Y/N/N and I-”

“Y/N,” he sighs, “of course it’s about her,” he groans, burying his face in his hands. He is silent, and I can see his shoulders tense and nostrils flare before he’s off the bed, pacing in front of me. "Y/N is a minor, Sam. You can't just up and take her with you to California. You do know what happens when you take a minor across state lines without their parent’s permission, don’t you? It’s called kidnapping. And I’m sure her parents would have no issue pressing charges against you. We've all tolerated your little romance,” he huffs, “but it's time to move on." I knew what that tone meant, no room for argument. "She's a nice girl and all, but she isn't cut out for the life we lead, you know that. You belong with your brother and me, and she belongs here."

“She's coming with me,” I state, trying to keep my voice steady. I wanted to ease into this subject, but I can see from just this moment that there’s no easy way to do this. "Her and the baby.”

He looks like I just hit him with a ton of bricks.

“Jesus Fucking Christ, Sam! She’s pregnant?” Dad roars, “she’s knocked up, and what? Goddammit, son, I told you. I told you to be careful, I told you to end it with her, and now you think you are going to ride off into the sunset? You’re going to take her away with you, from the only place she’s ever lived? She’s trying to trap you here, Sam, don’t you see that?"

He paces back and forth in front of me, his anger rolling off him in waves. I try to stay calm; he’s shocked and pissed. "You barely even know the girl. She could be sleeping around with half the boys in your class. You’re just gonna believe her when she tells you that kid is yours? No, Sam, I’m not gonna let you ruin your life just cause some little slut-"

All I see is red. I have dad on the floor before either of us realizes it’s happening. I’m holding him down as my fist pulls back and connects with his jaw.

“Don’t you talk about her that way!” I yell as my fist comes down again. I can already see a bruise forming at the base of his jaw, and I can feel my knuckles getting scrapped with every hit. "It's my baby!"

He doesn’t fight back at first, letting me get in a few more hits before his hand connects with my cheekbone. He flips us over, easily holding me down. He keeps me pinned there as I thrash against him. His palm meets my face again, and he loosens his grip on me. I pull my hand back, going for the final hit. I don’t realize that he’s trying to calm me down.

“Sam, you can’t let this girl ruin your life, and that’s exactly what’s going to happen.”

I hear the door open, and dad’s distracted as I land another blow. Dean pulls dad off of me, as I try to go in again. “What the fuck is going on?” He inspects dad as I get up, feeling the bruise forming on my cheek. Dean steps away from dad, and I go charging in again.

“That’s enough!” Dean shouts, stepping between the two of us. “Sammy, back off.” He looks back at dad, who’s wiping the blood away from his nose. Dean walks me away from dad, fights between us rarely got physical, and Dean knows that. Him needing to pull us off of each other could only mean something serious. “Talk to me, man, what’s going on?”

“Nothin’,” I pant. Dad lets out a sarcastic laugh. I move towards him again, jabbing the air as I try to close the space between us. Dean is quick to push me back, “Don’t talk about her.”

“You’re a selfish son of a bitch; you know that? Gonna walk away from your brother and me?” Dad spits out. “For what? Some girl? College?”

“Sam? What is he talking about?” Dean looks at me, questioningly.

“I was accepted into Stanford. And I’m going. I’m leaving first thing in the morning.”

“Wait, tomorrow?” Dean steps back, and his eyes go wide at my confession. “Sammy, you can’t. We need you.”

“I’m going, Dean, it's something I have to do. If I stay here any longer-”

“Sammy…” Dean runs his hands over his face, guiding me towards the door. “Let’s take a drive before you say something you’ll regret.”

“Fine,” I say, picking up my keys and exiting the room. Dean’s close behind me, entering the car as I turn the engine over.

“Something else you want to tell me, Sammy?” He asks, picking up the box. “Something to do with Y/N?”

“No,” I snap, grabbing it out of his hands and placing it in the glove box. He opens his mouth to speak again, “I mean it, Dean. Drop it.”

Y/N POV

I gather my things quietly, packing as much as I can into a large duffle bag. I write out a note and leave it on my desk, hoping that Sam and I will be long gone by the time mom or dad find it. They are making plans to send me away soon, sending me off to live in the middle of nowhere until the baby’s born, and I can put it up for adoption. I called Jana last night, asking her to take me to the motel, I know I can trust her to keep my request a secret.

I quietly make my way down the stairs and out the front door. Jana’s already at the corner where our streets intersect, warmly smiling as I get into her car, quietly sipping on a coffee. The smell makes my stomach turn, and I use every ounce of will-power I have to not vomit in her car. We sit in a comfortable silence as she drives towards the motel. I take in the town one final time, knowing I very well may never come back here. She drops me off in the parking lot and insists on staying until she sees Sam, but I assure her I’m okay.

I walk up to the door, knocking on it softly—grumbling coming from the other side. John answers the door, a look of surprise on his face when he realizes it’s me.

“Mr. Winchester," I say, looking around the room, noticing the alarm clock next to Sam’s bed, 6:15. "Is Sam here?"

John takes a deep breath, seemingly turning something over in his mind. He looks down at the bag at my feet.

“I’m sorry, darlin’, Sam’s gone," he says, pointing to where Sam usually parks his car. "He left last night."

“W-what?” I look into the room. “He said--” John smiles sympathetically at me. “He’s coming back, right?” I asked, hopefully. John shakes his head. “Can I call him? It’s important.”

“Left his phone here,” he says, gesturing to the side table. “Said he didn’t want to be bothered anymore.”

“But what about...?” I move my hands to my stomach, John’s eyes follow, and he lets out a sigh.

“He told me about the baby,” he says looking where my hands were gently laying. “I hate to be the one to tell you this Y/N, but he decided he wants nothing to do with it. Said it’s too much.” He takes another long breath as if what he’s about to say is going to hurt him. “Said he,” John closes his eyes as the words come out of his mouth, "doesn’t want to be saddled down with a kid.”

"What?" I can’t believe what I'm hearing. "Why would he say that?"

"I don’t know, darlin’. I told him if that’s how he felt, then he should talk with you.” He brings his hand up to his chin, and I notice a small bruise forming there. He rubs the scruff forming on his face, “He thinks that you got pregnant on purpose so you could trap him into staying here. ”

“I- I wasn’t, I’m not.” I shake my head. "I'm going to have the baby," I blurt out. “My parents wanted me to- to have an abortion, but I told them I couldn't." I take a long breath, trying to keep myself calm. "They want me to give it away, but- I don’t know, I want to keep it. It’s my baby.”

“You do whatever you think is right, Y/N. And if I hear from Sam, I’ll tell him what you’ve told me. Here,” he says, grabbing a notepad off the table and writing a number down. “You need anything, you call me, okay?”

“Thank you, Mr. Winchester,” I say, folding the paper gently and sticking it into the pocket of my bag, letting the tears I'd been holding back fall freely.

“You can call me John, Y/N, we’re family now.” He smiles warmly. “Let me take you home, darlin’.”

We don’t speak on the drive to my house; the only sound filling the air is my sniffs. John parks in front of my house, and gets out to come around and help me exit the truck. He stands there for a moment, before gently pulling me into a hug, reminding me to call him if I ever need anything. I smile and nod, wiping the tears away as I turn away from him, walking towards my home. I look back once more, and he gives me a smile and a wink. My parents are out the front door before I’ve made it halfway there. Mom keeps her arms around me as dad charges towards John’s truck.

“You keep your son away from my daughter. If you don’t, I’ll-”

“You’ll what?” John says, stepping away from the truck. “I’d choose your next words wisely.” Dad’s body stiffens as John approaches him, eyes shifting to me, then back to dad. “I know about Y/N’s condition, and I am no happier about it than you are.” It's the last thing I hear before mom ushers me inside. I watch from the living room window as John and dad continue talking for several minutes. As soon as he’s gone, mom and dad walk me towards their car, confirming what I already know; they’re sending me away.

Sam POV

We’ve been out for hours, Dean spending most of the time trying to get me to tell him what was going on between dad and me. He already knows that it involves Y/N/N, guessing that she was trying to get me to stay. “A-As long as you didn’t knock her up. Last thing any of us needs is a baby showing up on our doorstep.” I nearly choke on my beer.

“But you always wrapped it, right, Sammy?” he laughs, taking another shot. I nod hesitantly. “Then you got nothin’ to worry ‘bout.”

“Yeah.” A part of me wants to tell him, Dean’s the only one I know I can trust to help us through this, make dad understand. But as he finishes off his beer gesturing at the bartender for another, speech becoming more slurred, I know I can’t tell him, not like this. He’s pissed off enough at the thought of me leaving; I can’t disappoint him further.

“Stanford, huh?” He throws back another shot. I know he’s trying to cover the bitterness in his voice when he grumbles, “Dad’s never gonna let you go.”

“He can’t stop me; I’m nineteen. I’m not like you, Dean, I want to be more than just a hunter.”

“You’re just gonna go off, knowing what’s out there and not do anything about it?” Dean accuses, tossing back another shot of amber liquid. “Live some college-boy fantasy life? Join a frat?” He’s becoming more belligerent. “You should’ve dumped Y/N weeks ago. She won’t be able to handle the long-distance.” Dean brings the brown bottle to his lips. “Can’t let some chick stop us from what we do best.” Some chick. I want to punch him in his face. “They always fall hard, Winchester’s have a-always had a-way with the ladies.”

“Whatever you say, Dean.” He’s drunk and probably won’t remember any of this later. “Let’s go,” I say, pulling him off the barstool, and he nearly takes us both down. I walk him out of the bar, putting him in the back seat of my car so that he can sleep it off. I settle into the front seat, cautiously reach into the glove box, and pull out the ring. She’ll be there. She loves you. I repeat it over and over until sleep consumes me.

A rapping on my window pulls me out of my deep sleep, a security guard telling me to move along. Pulling out of the bar’s parking lot, I notice the time, 6:30. Shit, I need to hurry, I told Y/N to meet me at 7:00. Dean grumbles in the back seat as I pull into the motel’s lot and shut the car off. I’m already at the door to our room by the time he stumbles out of the back, but before I can stick the key in the lock dad swings the door open. Dad rolls his eyes as Dean struggles to stand upright.

“Dean, why don’t you go take a shower and sober up? We’re leaving in an hour,” he snaps, taking in our appearance. Dean mumbles in response as he pushes past me. Dad closes the door behind me and inhales deeply. I open my mouth to speak, but he raises his hand to stop me. When we hear the shower running, he turns to me, rubbing his face.

“Sam,” his eyes meet mine, “I know we both said some things last night.” I walk past him, not acknowledging him. “But you can’t just walk away. You can’t walk away from your brother and me. We need you, Sam.”

I consider his words and then grab my bag off the floor. “I’m going, and you can’t stop me.” I walk to the door, “Y/N/N will be here soon, and we’re leaving, together.”

“Y/N’s not going anywhere with you, Sam,” he says as I reach for the doorknob. “She called after you left, she and her parents agreed that the best decision for everyone would be termination. She doesn't want you around anymore. She wants you to stay away so that you both can move on with your lives.”

“No!” I shout, turning back to face him, I can feel the heat pooling in my face. “She wouldn’t do that; she loves me. What did you say to her?” I’m only inches away from him and can see the discoloration in his face from our previous fight. He continues to stare at me, face devoid of emotion. As I wait for him to answer, my anger gets the better of me, and my hand goes through the wall. “I know you said something,” I accuse him. “What did you say to her?”

“The only thing I told her,” he sighs, “is that you would support any decision she made.” My vision is hazy as I hit the floor, sobs leave my body, and I can’t breathe. "I know this isn’t what you wanted to hear, and I'm sorry.”

He pulls me into a hug, something that he hadn’t done in years, and lets me sob against him. “Y/N wants to be able to forget any of this ever happened, and I think you should too,” he says, trying his best to be comforting. I didn’t know how long I had been crying when dad finally spoke again. "I found us a case in Mississippi, and if we leave in the next hour, we can get there before dark.”

I pull away from him. Of course, the next thing he would bring up is a case. I’d just lost my first real love, and all he can think about is a case.

“No,” I mumble, wiping the tears away from my eyes.

“Care to speak up, Sam?” Anger replaces the calmness that filled his voice moments ago.

“I said, no.” Rolling my shoulders, I stand to my full height. “I told you last night that I’m leaving for California today. With or without Y/N/N, I'm done hunting.”

“You really are a stubborn son of a bitch. You’re gonna just leave your brother and me?” I don’t respond. "Just like that, huh? You get accepted into some fancy college, and now you're too good for us? Is that it? You'll never have a normal life, Sam. Whatever you do, you're going to put anyone you care about in the line of fire. You think you can handle that?” He scrubs a hand down his face. “Goddammit, son, think about your brother, you're just gonna walk outta here without a word to him? You think Y/N wants to have a kid with someone who has no respect for their family?"

"You don't know a fucking thing about me and Y/N/N.” I get into his face, “I love her. I want to marry her. I'm going to convince her to keep the baby."

"If you really care about her, you'll respect her wishes.” Dad lowers his voice when he hears the shower turn off. “She wants you to stay away, wants nothing more to do with you, and you will not manipulate that young girl into keeping a baby she clearly doesn't want just because you think you do.” Dean emerges, and dad pauses for a moment. “Let her move on with her life, son, and then you can too, with your brother and me. In a couple of months, you'll forget all about her."

“I’m done,” I huff, reaching for my bag.

“Sammy,” Dean pleads, “C’mon man, we talked about this, Y/N will understand.”

"You can’t control me anymore, dad,” I say bitterly, facing him once more. “I’m not going to be your obedient little soldier anymore. I fucking hate you. You robbed Dean of his childhood, I never had a chance, and now, when I’ve got the opportunity to start over, you think I’m going to pass it up, for you? I would’ve—for Y/N/N, but never ever would I do it for you,” I reach for the door. “All I ever wanted was to be normal. You won’t stop me this time.”

“You walk out that door, don’t you ever come back, you hear me? Ever.”

I look at Dean a final time; I can see his eyes glistening, his jaw clenches as I turn the doorknob. ‘I’m sorry.’ I open the door, taking a shuddering breath as I do the only thing I can; leave.

Next Chapter

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