#feels like a failure of a Chinese

[kkerosnes]

lalala hongbao lai see whatever the fuck

[dearlenore]

AN ‘I FEEL’ STATEMENT. / S.REID / SUMMARY - Spencer and you interrogate a suspect

PAIRING: bau!reader x spencer reid / w/c: 1.7K / ???

a/n: guess who this is based on and win a cookie

Spencer didn’t even look up when you barged into the motel room.

“Don’t say it,” he said, flipping a page in the case file.

You froze in the doorway, still halfway through pulling off your FBI jacket. “Say what?”

“That the crime scene smelled like expired deli meat and failure.”

You made a face. “Okay, rude. That’s classic FBI fieldwork ambiance.”

He looked up and smirked. “You’re predictable.”

You tossed your jacket on the chair and flopped onto the bed beside him. “You like me because I’m predictable.”

“I love you in spite of it.”

You stuck your tongue out and stole the file from his hands. “Alright, Dr. Sass, what do we know?”

“Third victim, male, 30s, found in an alley behind a gas station that sells ‘hot dogs’ that may or may not be actual meat,” Spencer replied with a snarky tone , leaning back against the headboard. “Ligature marks, same positioning as the first two. Garcia’s running facial rec now.”

You flipped through the photos. “This guy looks like my ex.”

Spencer tilted his head. “Which one? Also…You dated a guy with a neck tattoo that says Loyalty Over Everything?”

“He had a motorcycle and a soft spot for cats. It was a phase…. And the tattoo said ‘I’m a dick’ in Chinese.”

“I sincerely hope your standards have risen.”

You gave him a smug look. “Please. I’m dating a literal genius with three PhDs. I upgraded.”

He hummed. “Four soon.”

“Whatever,” you said, nudging his arm. “You’re basically the FBI’s version of a trophy husband.”

He blinked. “Are you saying I’m your trophy husband?”

“Yeah. Except instead of a yacht I got… trauma and access to crime scenes. I guess?”

Spencer rolled his eyes but couldn’t hide the smile tugging at his lips. “Romantic.”

You snickered. “That’s what they all say.”

For a while, you worked in comfortable silence, both reading over the files. The motel TV buzzed in the background, playing a rerun of some bad soap opera where the acting was worse than your last polygraph subject.

“So,” you said eventually, “you think this guy’s trying to make a point? The symmetry, the posing, the weird ‘I’m not mad, just disappointed’ energy of it all?”

Spencer looked thoughtful. “He’s definitely performing. But it’s subtle. Less drama, more… statement.”

“Like a TED Talk, but make it murder.”

“Exactly.”

You laughed. “I fucking hate Ted talks, people who talk for hours like that are so annoying.”

He glanced sideways at you. “Speak for yourself. I’m adorable.”

“You’re adorable in a ‘my girlfriend wants to kick my ass daily’ kind of way.”

“To be fair, you want to kick everyone’s ass. Some more sensually than others.”

“HEY! Me and Emily had a deal. Have you seen— actually don’t answer that I’d have to kill you.”

“I find you so oddly attractive.” He said, looking a bit perplexed by his own taste.

You bumped his shoulder gently. “You always say that like you’re surprised.”

Spencer gave you a soft look, the kind he saved for when the world got too heavy. “I’m not. You’re annoying and incredible.”

You grinned. “Aw. You’re such a sap when we’re surrounded by homicide photos. You should be more mindful of the dead,”

“Don’t ruin it.”

He leaned in to kiss you, brief and warm. Then he stole the case file back like the nerd he was.

“Fine,” you said, standing up and stretching. “I’ll go see if Morgan found anything useful, or if he’s just flirting with the local deputy again.”

“Tell him if she has a cowboy hat, he has my blessing.”

You grabbed your jacket, pausing at the door. “If I get shot, tell the team I died being hotter than all of them.”

Spencer looked up with a totally deadpan expression and whistled. “That goes without saying.”

You blew him a kiss and shut the door behind you, already drafting what you’d say to Morgan when you saw him.

Eventually , you’d caught the guy.

The suspect sat cuffed to the table, arms crossed, expression somewhere between cocky and confused. He’d asked for a lawyer three times. The team knew it. So did you. But now he was suddenly cooperative—and you had a feeling that had less to do with his conscience and more to do with the fact that Morgan had promised he’d be “dealing with Dr. Reid next.”

What he didn’t know?

He was getting both of you.

You stepped into the interrogation room, Spencer behind you, both of you in sync like you were about to perform a synchronized FBI ballet—but with more psychological warfare.

Outside the one-way glass, Morgan muttered, “This’ll be interesting.”

Inside the room, you dropped into the chair across from the suspect and offered a sugary smile.

“Hi, Marcus. Love the scowl. Very tough guy who definitely has never cried in a 90s Honda civic. Or was it a Toyota?”

Spencer sat beside you, calm and collected, opening the file in front of him like he was about to politely destroy a man’s entire worldview.

Marcus raised an eyebrow. “So they sent the nerd and the girlfriend?”

You smiled wider. “Aw. You think I’m just the girlfriend. That’s cute.”

Spencer didn’t look up. “Statistically, assuming a woman is less competent in a professional setting increases the likelihood of public humiliation by seventy-three percent. But don’t worry, we’ll keep it between us.”

“For real? You just know that?” The suspect hissed.

“No asshole, I made it up…” Spencer mumbled, still looking at the file and reading it closely.

You slid the photo across the table—victim number two. “Let’s talk about this guy. You were seen outside his apartment the night he was killed. Coincidence, or did ya get the first time murder jitters?”

“I didn’t kill anyone.”

Spencer’s voice was deceptively light. “We didn’t say you did. You said that. Interesting.”

You leaned in, resting your chin on your hand. “Also interesting? That your fingerprints were on the door handle, and the doormat has your boot tread on it. You’re either involved or you’re just deeply nosy.”

Marcus shrugged. “Maybe I was there. Doesn’t mean anything.”

“Oh, honey,” you said, voice syrupy-sweet. “People like you never do things for no reason. You can’t even microwave instant soup without making it about your masculinity.”

Spencer coughed like he was covering a laugh.

“Also if you’re microwaving soup shame on you. Put it in a damn pot on the stove like the rest of us.” You groaned, knowing damn well you did it yesterday.

“Look,” Marcus said, sitting up straighter. “I don’t have to say anything to you.”

You looked around the room , faux confusion on your face. He literally asked for you?

Spencer tapped the table twice. “Totally fair. You’re exercising your rights. But just to clarify, you’re not denying you were there. So if we subpoena your phone, we’re not going to be shocked by GPS data, right?”

You leaned toward Spencer and whispered loudly, “Is this the part where we pretend we don’t already have that?”

He nodded seriously. “Yes, for dramatic effect.”

Marcus shifted. “You’re bluffing.”

“Buddy,” you said, leaning back. “The FBI does two things really well: crush dreams and ruin lives. And my boyfriend here’s got a PhD in both.”

Spencer added, “Technically only one, but I did minor in destroying egos.”

“Oh for real? That’s fine I have a masters in being better than most people and humbling men. I think that’ll suffice.” You replied.

Outside the glass, JJ blinked. “Are they… flirting? In the middle of an interrogation?”

Hotch muttered, “I think it’s working?”

Back inside, the suspect was starting to sweat, his earlier confidence deflating like a balloon at a sad birthday party.

You pulled out another photo—this time of Marcus’s ex, who had filed a restraining order last year. You dropped it gently on the table.

Spencer’s voice was quiet. “She’s scared of you.”

“And she was like 16.”

Marcus looked like he wanted to disappear into the floor as Spencer flipped to the next page in the file.

“Her name was Emily,” he said calmly, tapping the paper. “She filed for a restraining order at sixteen. Updated it again when she turned seventeen.”

Marcus scoffed. “She was—she acted older than she was.”

You blinked. Spencer’s jaw twitched.

“Oh wow,” you said, leaning forward. “Do you have an I feel statement about that?”

Spencer didn’t miss a beat. “Yeah, like—‘I feel like I want to date children’?”

You nodded thoughtfully. “That’s the vibe I’m getting too. Really leaning into the predator energy.”

“I’m not a predator,” Marcus snapped, defensive now, angry. “You don’t know anything about me.”

Spencer arched a brow. “We literally read your search history.”

You added, “And the restraining order. And the texts. And your very creative Reddit username.”

“Subtle wasn’t your strong suit,” Spencer muttered.

You leaned back in your chair, folding your arms. “So here’s what we do know about you, Marcus: you’re insecure, violent when women say no, and very interested in people who are still in Algebra II. That about cover it?”

He opened his mouth—then shut it again.

“That’s what I thought,” you said sweetly, before glancing over at Spencer with a grin. “See? We’re so good at this.”

He smiled back. “Terrifyingly good.”

“You think this is funny?” Marcus snapped, finally rattled. “This little good cop, bad cop thing?”

You raised an eyebrow. “Good cop? You sweet summer child.”

“We’re not good cop, bad cop,” Spencer added helpfully. “We’re bad cop, worse cop.”

“I’m worse,” you chimed in. “Obviously.”

Spencer nodded. “That tracks.”

Marcus was silent, jaw tense.

You leaned in again, tone shifting. “Look. You talk to us, you get some control back. You don’t, and we throw this entire file at the prosecutor and let them tear you apart. Your call.”

Spencer added, “Statistically, cooperating suspects receive lighter sentences. Not that you seem like a man who cares about consequences, given your stunning history of rage texting and unpaid parking tickets… and dating children.”

You smiled. “Seriously, ten tickets? What are you, allergic to parallel parking?”

Marcus stared at the table, finally cracking.

“I didn’t mean to hurt him,” he muttered.

You and Spencer exchanged a glance.

“Okay,” you said, sitting back. “Now we’re getting somewhere.”

[sarshles-cheescake-li]

Link Click, internet slang, and Chinese culture

On the Chinese internet, there's a nickname for Link Click called Shiguang Daidaoren, meaning "the blade-bringers of time" instead of "the managers of time," the original title. Calling something "blade" is Chinese internet slang for something being angsty; whether it be derivative content or the originals themselves. Another meme is that Link Click isn't zhiyu (治愈，healing), which it is tagged as on Bilibili, but zhiyu (致郁，causing depression).

Link Click, especially its first season, is a deeply emotional and sentimental show. And it's a shame that so much of it gets not so much lost in literal, linguistic translation as much as it does in cultural, contextual translation. Many people can understand Emma's pain of being away from her parents in a new city, working a difficult job. But watching the scrolling comments on Bilibili, you get the cultural context of it -- the massive migration patterns within China from rural to urban, the children growing up and having to shed their local fangyan (方言) or, less formally, tuhua (土话)("speech of the locations" and "old-fashioned words," respectively) in exchange for Beijing Mandarin. This massive nation, nearly twice the population of Europe and only about 6% smaller in terms of area, is so diverse as to have created (what is close to) an immigrant experience for its citizens entirely within its borders. You visit your parents on Chunjie (春节）, lunar/Chinese new year, on packed trains during the largest singular human migration event on Earth, annually. And when you get home, you are faced with something different from the cities you now live in -- everything from the buildings to the furniture to the clothes they wear. I hadn't realized how deeply I missed the gaudy, garish mianao (棉袄，coats) and mianbei (棉被，cotton blankets) until I saw familiar shades of too-bright burgundy in the hands of Emma's parents. The concept of this original-home, laojia (老家, old-home) is so strongly baked into our lives that every time I meet another Chinese person, I cannot but help but ask them 你老家哪儿啊? Where is your original-home? And even though I know nothing about Chinese geography, every time I hear the answer, a little piece slots into place nonetheless.

In slang, if something made you cry or otherwise feel an emotion you weren't expecting to feel, you refer to it as pofang (破防，breaking defences). And maybe it says something that an expression of human emotion is viewed as a failure in some defences, but that's introspection for another time. Watching on Bilibili, with its hundreds of comments scrolling by "My defences have been breached" and sobbing onomatopoeia, people in the comments saying that they miss their mothers and fathers -- I, too, miss my family. When Cheng Xiaoshi, in Chen Xiao's body, tried to speak his host body's local variation and came up with butchered dongbeihua (东北话, words of the east-north), I nearly fell out of my chair. It was the sound of home, of my grandmother telling us to hush around noon because our neighbours were napping and my grandfather showing me how to play spider solitaire.

Cheng Xiaoshi's breakdown in episode 5 hits hard for its vulnerability. "I'm scared of the dark" has the same literal meaning as "我怕黑," sure, but there is something devastatingly childlike in that three-syllable declaration of fear. Where English so often derives meaning from complexity, from winding metaphors and beautiful prose, Chinese can derive breathtaking meaning from less breath than it takes to say the word analogy. 我怕黑 is stripped of any grown-up pretenses of control or dignity. It is the barest this statement can be: I. Scared. Darkness.

And what he says following, too. 我害怕一个人. Longer yet no less potent. Alone, or lonely, has many translations in Chinese. 孤独. 寂寞. 孤单. 单独. Many more synonyms for all the different ways you can be lonely. But 一个人 is, once again, an almost child-like way of saying it. Before you have the vocabulary to express these complex emotions, 一个人 is a perfectly working expression. Translating it character-by-character, it means one singular person. It is something you say when you've been left behind. When you've been made to face everything by yourself. When the world is so, so, big, and you are just one singular person, with no companions to stand with you.

And, ah, Li Tianxi's Chinese nickname, 小希. It is the last character of her full name, with a "little" shoved right in front. It is an affectionate way to call someone younger than you. It is different from Xixi, its English rendition, because a repetition of the last character is a more generalized, affectionate nickname, whereas diminutives are almost always reserved for someone younger than you, when used in real life. The diminutive says don't be scared. I'm here now. I'll handle it.

There are endless details in Link Click that make everything about it seem a little bit more like home. The word 面馆 which means something a little, subtly different than "restaurant" or "noodles shop," a difference lost without the context of the phrase 下馆子 and the way adults say it with the gladness of once-children who only ate meat on new years. The "honorifics" as English calls them, to me more of just -- ingrained parts of someone's name. Within the snap of Mandarin syllables there is meaning and memory in every character. Jie, mei, di, ge, lao, da, xiao -- they are more than their literal meanings. They are a relationship, a promise.

Perhaps I am overthinking this, awkwardly Chinese as I am: too localized to be considered first-generation, too stubbornly attached to relate to second-generation. Maybe these linguistic subtleties only exist and matter in my mind, a writer of both languages (though I must say, my Chinese prose leaves… much to be desired) with a knack for pedantics. Regardless, I hope other Chinese fans of this show share this feeling. And surely, other people will, too. All the rural children who left home to pursue higher education and opportunities in faraway cities; the raised-in-poverty who spent their childhoods dreaming of buying their family new coats; the speakers of languages long since abandoned by their childhood friends. What a delight it is to see yourself in stories, neither exception nor abnormality but a norm. What a joy it is to be one of one point four billion.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Surveillance is inequality’s stabilizer

I'm in the home stretch of my 24-city book tour for my new novel PICKS AND SHOVELS. Catch me in LONDON NEXT TUESDAY (July 1) with TRASHFUTURE'S RILEY QUINN and then a big finish in MANCHESTER on July 2.

The "dictator's dilemma" pits a dictator's desire to create social stability by censoring public communications in order to prevent the spread of anti-regime messages with the dictator's need to know whether powerful elites are becoming restless and plotting a coup:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/26/dictators-dilemma/#garbage-in-garbage-out-garbage-back-in

Closely related to the dictator's dilemma is "authoritarian blindness," where an autocrat's censorship regime keeps them from finding out about important, socially destabilizing facts on the ground, like whether a corrupt local official is comporting themself so badly that the people are ready to take to the streets:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/02/24/pluralist-your-daily-link-dose-24-feb-2020/#thatswhatxisaid

The modern Chinese state has done more to skillfully navigate the twin hazards of the dictator's dilemma and authoritarian blindness than any other regime in history. Take Xi Jinping's 2012-2015 anticorruption purge, which helped him secure another ten year term as Party Secretary. Xi targeted legitimately corrupt officials in this this sweeping purge, but – crucially – he only targeted corrupt officials in the power-base of his rivals for Party leader, while leaving corrupt officials in his own power base unscathed:

https://web.archive.org/web/20181222163946/https://peterlorentzen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Lorentzen-Lu-Crackdown-Nov-2018-Posted-Version.pdf

How did Xi accomplish this feat? Through intense, fine-grained surveillance, another area in which modern China excels. Chinese online surveillance is often paired with censorship, both petty (banning Winnie the Pooh, whom Xi is often mocked for resembling) and substantial (getting Apple to modify Airdrop for every user in the world in order to prevent the spread of anti-regime messages before a key Party leadership contest).

But there are a lot of instances where China spies on its people but doesn't censor them, even if they are expressing dissatisfaction with the government. Chinese censors allow a surprising amount of complaint about official incompetence, overreach and corruption, but they completely suppress any calls for mobilization to address these complaints. You can be as angry as you want with the government online, but you can't call for protests to do something about it:

https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/science.1251722

This makes perfect sense in the context of "authoritarian blindness": by allowing online complaint, an autocrat can locate the hot-spots where things are reaching a boiling-over point, and by blocking public manifestations, the autocrat can prevent the public from turning their failings into a flashpoint that endangers the autocracy.

In other words, autocrats can reserve to themselves the power to decide how to defuse public anger: they can suppress it, using surveillance data about the people who led the online debate about official failures to figure out who to intimidate, arrest, or disappear. Or they can address it through measures like firing corrupt local officials or funding local social programs (toxic waste cleanups, smokestack regulation, building schools and hospitals, etc) that make people feel better about their government.

Autocracy is an inherently unstable social situation. No society can deliver everything that everyone in it desires: if you tear down existing low-density housing and build apartment blocks to decrease a housing shortage, you'll delight people who are un- or under-housed, and you'll infuriate people who are happily housed under the status quo. In every society, there's always someone getting their way at the expense of someone else.

Obviously, widespread unhappiness is inherently socially destabilizing. After all, no society can police every action of every person. From littering to parking in disabled parking spots, from paying your taxes to washing your hands before serving food, a society relies primarily on people following the rules without even though their face little to no risk of being punished for breaking them. The easiest way to get people to follow the rules is to foster a sense of the rules' legitimacy: people may not agree with or understand the rationale for a rule, but if they view the process by which the rule was decided on as a legitimate one, then they may follow it anyway.

This legitimacy is a source of social stability. Sure, your candidate might lose the election, or the government might enact a policy you hate, but if you think the election was fair and you believe that you can change the policy through democratic means, then you will be on the side of preserving the system, rather than overturning it.

A democracy's claim to legitimacy lies in its popular mandate: "Sure, I don't like this decision, but it was fairly made." By contrast, a dictator's legitimacy comes their claims to wisdom: "Sure, I don't like this decision, but the Supreme Generalissimo is the smartest man in history, and he says it was the right call."

You can see how this is a brittle arrangement, even if the dictator is a skilled autocrat who makes generally great decisions: even a great decision is going to have winners and losers, and it might be hard to convince the losers that they keep losing because they deserve to lose. And that's the best outcome, where an autocrat is right. But what about when the autocrat is wrong? What about when the autocrat makes a bunch of decisions that make nearly everyone consistently worse off, either because the autocrat is a fool, or because they are greedy and are stealing everything that isn't nailed down?

Every society needs stabilizers, but autocracies need more stabilizers than democracies, because the story about why you, personally, are getting screwed is a lot less convincing in an autocracy ("The autocrat is right and you are wrong, suck it up") than it is in a democracy ("This was the fairest compromise possible, and if it wasn't, we need to elect someone new so it changes").

The Snowden revelations taught us that there is no distinction between commercial surveillance and government surveillance. Governments spy, sure, but the most effective way for governments to spy on us is by raiding the data troves assembled by technology companies (for one thing, these troves are assembled at our own expense – we foot the bill for this spying whenever we send money to a phone or tech company). The tech companies were willing participants in this process: the original Snowden leak, about the "PRISM" program, showed how tech companies made millions of dollars by siphoning off user data to the NSA on demand:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PRISM

It was only later that we learned about another NSA program, "Upstream," through which the NSA was wiretapping the tech companies' data-centers, acquiring all of their user data, and then requesting the data that interested them through PRISM, as a form of "parallel construction," which is when an agency learns a fact through a secret system, and then uses a less-secret system to acquire the same fact, in order to maintain the secrecy of the first system:

https://www.eff.org/pages/upstream-prism

Upstream really pissed off the tech companies. After all, they'd been dutifully rolling over and handing out their users' data in violation of US law, risking their businesses to help the NSA do mass spying, and the NSA paid them back by secretly spying on the tech companies themselves! That's a hell of a way to say thank you to your co-conspirators. After Upstream, the tech companies finally started encrypting the links between their data-centers, which made Upstream-style collection infinitely harder:

https://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2013/11/yahoo-will-encrypt-between-data-centers-use-ssl-for-all-sites/

But that hardly ended the mass surveillance private-public partnership. Congress continued to do nothing about privacy (the last federal consumer privacy law Congress gave Americans is 1988's Video Privacy Protection Act, which bans video store clerks from telling newspapers about the VHS cassettes you take home) (we used to be a country). That meant that tech companies could collect our data will-ye or nil-ye, and that data brokers could buy and sell that data without any oversight or limitation:

https://pluralistic.net/2025/02/20/privacy-first-second-third/#malvertising

There's many reasons that Congress failed to act on privacy. Obviously, they face immense pressure from lobbyists for the commercial surveillance industry – but they also face covert and powerful pressure from public safety agencies, cops, and spies, who rely on private sector data as a source of off-the-books, warrantless, ubiquitous surveillance.

Why does America need so much spying? Well, because America has always been imperfectly democratic, from its inception as a enslaving nation where millions of people were denied both the ballot and personhood; and as a patriarchal nation where half of the remaining people were also denied the franchise; and as a colonialist nation where an entire culture of people had been subject to genocide, land theft, and systematic oppression. This is an obviously unstable arrangement. Whether in chains, on a reservation, or under the thumb of a husband or father, there were plenty of Americans who had no reason to buy into the system, accept its legitimacy, or follow its rules. To keep the system intact, it wasn't enough to terrorize these populations – America's rulers had to know where to inflict terror, which is to say, where order was closest to collapsing.

Some of America's first spies were private sector union-busters, the Pinkerton agency, who served as a private spy army for bosses who wanted to find the leverage points in the worker uprisings that swept the country. The Pinkertons' pitch was that it was cheaper to pay them to figure out who the most important union leaders were and target them for violence, kidnapping, and killing than it was to give all your workers a raise.

This is an important aspect of the surveillance project. Spying is part of a broader class of activities called "guard labor" – anything you might pay someone to do that results in fewer guillotines being built on your lawn. Guard labor can be paying someone to build a wall around your estate or neighborhood. It can be paying security guards to patrol the wall. It can be paying for CCTV operators, or drone operators. It can be paying for surveillance, too.

Guard labor isn't free. The pitch for guard labor is that it is a cheaper way to get social stability than the alternative: building schools and hospitals, paying a living wage, lowering prices, etc. It follows that when you make guard labor cheaper, you can build fewer schools and hospitals, pay lower wages, and raise prices more, and buy more guard labor to counter the destabilizing effect of these policies, and still come out ahead.

American politics have been growing ever more unstable since the 1970s, when oil crisis gave way to the Reagan revolution and its raft of pro-oligarch, anti-human policies. Since then, we've seen an unbroken trend to wage stagnation and widening inequality. As a new American oligarch class emerged, they gained near-total control over the levers of power. In a now-famous 2014 paper, political scientists reviewed 1,779 policy fights and found that the only time these cashed out in a way that reflected popular will is when elites favored them, too. When elites objected to something, it literally didn't matter how popular it was with everyone else, it just didn't happen:

https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/perspectives-on-politics/article/testing-theories-of-american-politics-elites-interest-groups-and-average-citizens/62327F513959D0A304D4893B382B992B

It's pretty hard to make the case that the system is legitimate when it only does things that rich people want, and never does things the vast majority of people want when these conflict with rich peoples' desires. Some of these outcomes are merely disgusting and immoral, like abetting genocide in Gaza, but more frequently, the policies elites favor are ones that make the rich richer: climate inaction, blocking Medicare for All, smashing unions, dismantling anti-corruption and campaign finance laws.

I don't think it's a coincidence that America's democracy has become significantly less democratic at the same time that mass surveillance has grown. Mass surveillance makes guard labor much cheaper, which means that the rich can make their lives better at all of our expense and still afford the amount of guard labor it takes to keep the guillotines at bay.

Cheap guard labor also allows the rich to strike devil's bargains that would otherwise be instantaneously destabilizing. For example, the second Trump election required an alliance between the tiny minority of ultra-rich with the much larger minority of virulent racists who were promised the realization of their psychotic fantasy of masked, armed goons snatching brown people off the streets and sending them to offshore slave labor camps. That alliance might be a good way to elect a president who'll dismantle anticorruption law and slash taxes, but it won't do you much good if the resulting ethnic cleansing terror provokes a popular uprising. But what if ICE can rely on Predator drones and cell-site simulators to track the identities of everyone who comes out to a protest:

https://www.wired.com/story/cbp-predator-drone-flights-la-protests/

What if ICE can buy off-the-shelf facial recognition tools and use them to identify people who are brave enough to step between snatch-squads and their neighbors?

https://www.404media.co/ice-is-using-a-new-facial-recognition-app-to-identify-people-leaked-emails-show/?ref=daily-stories-newsletter

Each advance in surveillance tech makes worse forms of oppression, misgovernance and corruption possible, by making it cheaper to counter the destabilizing effect of destroying the lives of the populace, through identifying the bravest, angriest, and most effective opposition figures so they can be targeted for harassment, violence, arrest, or kidnapping.

America's private sector surveillance industry has always served as a means of identifying and punishing people who fought for a better country. The first credit reporting bureau was the Retail Credit Company, which used a network of spies and paid informants to identify "race mixers," queers, union organizers and leftists so that banks could deny them credit, landlords could deny them housing, and employers could deny them jobs:

https://jacobin.com/2017/09/equifax-retail-credit-company-discrimination-loans/

Retail Credit continued to do this until 1975, when, finally, popular opinion turned against the company, so it changed its name…

…to Equifax.

Today, Equifax is joined by a whole industry of elite enforcers who use spying, legal harassments, mercenaries and troll armies to offset the socially destabilizing effects of the wealthy's misrule:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/08/23/launderers-enforcers-bagmen/#procurers

But despite centuries of American mass surveillance, America's oligarchs keep finding themselves in the midst of great existential crises. That's because guard labor – even surveillance-supercharged guard labor – is no substitute for policies that make the country better off. Oligarchs may want to tend the nation like a shepherd tends its flock, leaving enough lambs around to grow next year's wool. But they're all competing with one another, and they understand that the sheep they spare will like as not end up on a rival's dinner table. Under those circumstances, every oligarch ends up in a race to see who can turn us into lambchops first.

This is the dictator's dilemma, American style. The rich always overestimate how much social stability their guard labor has bought them, and they're easy mark for any creepy, malodorous troll with a barn full of machine-gun equipped drones:

https://twitter.com/postoctobrist/status/1909853731559973094

They accumulate mounting democratic debts, as destabilizing rage builds in the public, erupting in the Civil War, in the summer of 68, in the Battle of Seattle, in the Rodney King uprising, in the George Floyd protests, in Los Angeles rebellion. They think they can spy their way into a country where they have everything and we have nothing, and we like it (or at least, never dare complain about it).

They're wrong.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2025/06/26/autostabilizer/#slicey-bois

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[bethanydelleman]

I'm watching a Chinese drama called Blossom right now and it's doing historical arranged marriage in such an interesting way and it's making me think more about my post about arranged marriage and particularly, what models of marriage has the female character seen growing up?

Because maybe part of why the Sad/Angry at arranged marriage princess/noble woman feels so hollow is because the mother is usually placidly sitting beside her husband pushing for marriage too. If your parents have a fine arranged marriage, what are you so worried about? It can come off more as a petulant kid than a real denunciation if we don't have indication that they really know what they're mad about or afraid of (Eloise Bridgerton...) Especially when they keep emphasizing how the girls are sheltered and ignorant, where did she manage to get this disillusioned?

This drama has so far shown three failed marriages, all unique. One marriage broke down because the husband was sexually assaulting female servants, another because after emotionally supporting her failure of a husband for 10 years, he took a second wife right after getting his dream job (that one felt so real), and the last woman accepted her marriage wouldn't have affection but was appalled when her husband cheated on her with her half-sister as it violated her sense of marital decency and respect.

What I really like the most is the characters mostly buy into, and all of them expect, marriage to be explicitly political. The whole mindset feels a lot more genuine to the time period. No one is Shocked Pikachu Face that they'll be asked to marry someone for family alliance reasons. And the anti-marriage female lead, she earned that opinion. She knows. She's haunted.

[rosenclaws]

I love your different Logan reaction works so much! How would the Logans react to a reader who is crying/ is embarrassed because she totally failed to cook a meal for him? Like she was super excited to make dinner for date night and when he gets there it’s a burnt mess.

I’m really hard on myself about my cooking so I would cry if I made something I wasn’t happy with for this man tbh. I once made mac and cheese for my bf’s family at thanksgiving and it was too grainy I almost cried

Origins Logan - Okay so Logan works hard and you really wanted to make him dinner one night after an extra long shift. You went to the store and followed the recipe to a tee. At least you thought. You swore you set the timer but suddenly smoke was coming out of the oven and your dinner was up in flames. Literally.

I read a fic that was basically this scenario + deeper stuff and it was exactly how I imagined Origins Logan to react. He would hate to see you crying over dinner. All he cares about is seeing you when he gets home. He doesn’t need some extravagant dinner. When he walks through the front door he smells the smoke and thinks the worst. He’s thankful it’s just some burnt food. He wipes your tears and tells you it’s all gonna be okay. He ends up finding some tv dinners and makes them instead. He’s smiling wide as you two share your dinner.

the fic btw is called Redamancy by @little-miss-dilf-lover

Trilogy Logan -

Logan can smell the smoke from his room. At first he thought some student was messing around or maybe someone had burnt dinner again. He stomps down with an annoyed look ready to chew out whoever stunk up the whole house. Until he walks in and sees you in tears next to the trash can. See while he was regaining his memories he had told you about this meal he remembers eating. It wasn't complicated but it felt like home and he wished he could eat it again. So you made it your mission to cook it for him. It took a bit to find what he was talking about and finding a good recipe but you found it.

You had worked hard to keep it a secret and were going to serve it to him tonight. Then you burnt it. Completely ruined it. You were devastated and to make matters worse Logan was there to see all your failures. You explained to him through the tears what you wanted to do and apologized but Logan wasn't having any of it. He appreciates the fact that you even wanted to do that for him. It means a lot. He tells you he can order a pizza and next time to ask him to come cook with you. Pressing a kiss to the tear tracks on your face.

DOFP Logan -

Logan was working hard and you wanted to surprise him with date night. He always goes above and beyond when he plans dates. He makes you feel so loved and cared for that you want to do the same for him. So you tell him all he has to do is show up and look handsome while you handled everything. You were going to make his favorite meal and you decorated outside with pretty lights and a nice table. Even bribing a few of the students to be out of the mansion for the night.

Despite all of this you let the most important thing fail. The food. Burnt to a crisp you tried to salvage it but to no avail. You lost track of time and Logan showed up to you crying outside. Nothing to serve to the man who always managed to get things right. He kneeled by your side and you cried as you told him what you were planning. Feeling horrible that he does all this for you and you can't even cook him dinner. Poor Logan would hate to see you cry. He doesn't need a fancy dinner to know you love him, you show him every day. He promises he doesn't care about dinner and that the fact you wanted to do this was enough for him. He won't let the cute set up go to waste as he orders Chinese food and the two of you share some fried rice out under the stars.

Old Man Logan -

Logan and Laura were amazing. The two of them had entered your life unexpectedly but man were you grateful for it. Logan was nothing but a loving father, doing his best to provide while giving Laura a normal life. Their relationship wasn't the average father daughter one but you could tell she trusts him with every bone in her body. You and Logan were...something. Flirting had turned to more one night and now well, you aren't sure exactly what you are. But he calls you sweetheart and sleeps in your bed so. It's something.

You invited both of them over for dinner one night, wanting to show them how much they meant to you but everything went to shit. You weren't sure what to make and then you didn't buy the right ingredients and then you ran out of time. Just everything that went wrong did go wrong. When they showed up at your door you had just given up. Your kitchen a mess. Your eyes were full of tears as you told them that dinner was off. Laura and Logan could see just how upset you were about it and in their own way tried to comfort you. Laura told you she doesn't even like what you wanted to make anyways and Logan scolds her for it. Logan hasn't had a home cooked meal in a long time and so it means a lot that you tried so hard. Regardless of how successful it ended up being.

I think while Logan dries your tears Laura pokes around your kitchen, coming back to say they can just make something else. Your dinner might not have been a success but the three of you in the kitchen making box mac and cheese and grilling whatever was in your fridge was enough for you.

Worst Logan -

Oh man the moment he hears home cooked meal he's so excited. I think Logan in his world literally lived off of gas station food and liquor. You could see how much his eyes lit up at hearing that you were going to make dinner. He even asked if you could make this one specific meal. Well he didn't ask directly he did leave some not so subtle hints and eventually Wade just told you he really wanted you to make it but was too much of a pussy to ask.

You wanted it to be perfect so bad but life had other plans. Wade was supposed to keep Logan busy so you could set everything up but when they came back the oven was literally on fire. The tinfoil you were using to cover your dish had caught fire and then the whole oven did. One call to the fire department later and you were left with nothing. You cried and Logan felt horrible. You told him you that you wanted him to feel like he really belonged here so badly and he told you that he already does because you make him feel welcome every day. You're so kind to him and you make him happier than he ever thought he could be.

The three of you end up going to some shitty diner because Wade is banned from the good one. Yet you've never felt happier sharing some dry pancakes with Logan.

[inkdrinkerworld]

Inn Love Chapter 3

one two

cw: money issue talks, feelings of failure, james and reader being in love and idiots, a little angst (?) friends to lovers

wc: 2.6

“It’s not looking good,” you mutter to Mary, head in your hands as you go over the accounts one more time. 

“It’s the off season, we’ll find something else to do.” 

She’s too kind, too understanding. You wish she’d blow up at you and quit for not being able to pay her on time. 

You sigh, long and hard. You have to figure it out. The Secret Garden is your baby, and even though this is your second year owning it, you’ve still not figured out how to supplement the off season so you make a profit. 

You don’t know if you’ll ever be able to. 

“We might have to. How do you feel about starting up line dancing lessons for a little bit? Just until I figure it out?” 

Mary grins, nodding her head. “I’ve missed it some. Won’t exactly be hard to get back into.” 

Mary’s the best worker you have. The only one you have really, but she’s still the best. 

You close up your books, and double check that all the rooms have been checked out of and begin locking up. 

James is waiting for you on your front steps, hat tipped low as he leans against one of the beams. 

“Hey Jamie, didn’t know you were stopping by.” 

You try for chipper, a smile in your voice as you hold your tote bag on your shoulder. 

“Wanted to see if you wanted to get lunch with me.”

You pause, reaching right in front of him. It’s instant, the way a frown fights for the space of your smile. It’s also instant the way James notices. 

“What’s wrong?” He takes your bag from you, leading you to his truck. 

“Nothing. Where are we getting lunch?” 

James frowns a little bit, but doesn’t press. “Had Chinese dropped off to the house, got all your favourites.” 

You grin, James does this a lot and it makes your stomach flip every time. 

“Meet you there?” 

James frowns again, then shrugs. “Yeah, darling.” 

You double back to your own truck, James setting your bag in the bench seat. 

You watch James pull out first and take a moment to collect all your worry and all your anxiety and stuff it deep in your chest, burying it with a bit of hay before sighing. 

You can’t let James see you’re worried or anxious, he’ll sniff the information out of you and if you tell James then you’d have failed. 

The first year it was understandable, the second year; you’re not sure you could tell the person who helped you build the inn from the ground up that you’ve been having months of money troubles. 

You pull up behind James, sliding out of your car and racing him to the front door. 

“You still cheat.” he says with a smile, you shrug while pushing open the door. Inside James’ house, you’d think it was hot, all the southern heat trapped in the walls, but it’s always cool. 

He’d explained it to you once, the stone and wood kept it cool, but also he had put in a central air con to maintain the chill. 

“I got shorter legs than you James, it’d never be fair.” 

James shakes his head, following you to his dining table where all the boxes are already laid out. 

“How much noodles am I allowed?” James rolls his eyes. You always eat most of it and he always gets you your own box because why deprive you of your favourite thing?

James doesn’t think there’s actually anything he could deprive you of. 

“Does lack of sleep mess with your memory?”

You grin when he passes you an entire box, and then the rest of what you usually like.

As you eat, the talking kind of subsides, which is weird by yours and James’ standards.

“Are you sure nothing’s wrong?” He asks when you migrate to the living room, laying out long on his sofa while he sits with your feet in his lap. 

“What do you mean, Jamie?” You try hard not to stiffen your body as you respond. 

He sighs, hands squeezing the arches of your feet. “I dunno, something feels wrong. Like you feel down.” 

God you could cry right now. James has always been in tune to you like this, as you are with him, but it sometimes gets to be too much because lying to your best friend hurts. Especially when he can tell something is off. 

“Just tired I guess.” you shrug one of your shoulders. James hums but doesn’t say anything and you feel guilt like a hot poker in your stomach. 

You wiggle your toes in his lap and his hands fall back to massaging them. 

“Wanna watch ‘How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days’?” 

James never has to ask twice. 

You don’t mean to, but you and James fall asleep right there on his sofa. Some time during the night you’ve shifted, he’s laying under you and your head is on part of his chest with your legs tangled up. 

The only reason you wake up is because James’ alarm is blaring and you’ve got the worst crick in your neck.

“Make it stop,” you grumble, hiding your face in his chest as he stretches. It’s comfortable even for friends, the way James holds onto your waist as he leans over you to grab his phone. 

“Shit, s’nearly four. You gotta go darling.” 

You’d lasted nearly a whole three minutes without thinking about the fact that The Secret Garden wasn’t doing well. 

Almost awkwardly, which is strange for you and James, you sit up. As you stretch all your joints crack and you sigh where James winces. He’s always hated how you can just crack your bones like that- he worries you’ll break them one day. 

“Nah I got the day off.” 

James’ eyebrows shoot up. “So the TSG is closed today?” 

You wish your friend wouldn’t ask so many questions. Lying to him is hard work. 

“Mary’s running the morning shift today.” James looks a little sceptical but drops it, making his way to the stairs. 

“M’gonna get ready. You staying on the ranch then?” 

You nod, what else is there for you to do? Plus if you use your ‘day off’ to be anywhere but the ranch, say going job hunting or to the bank, your quiet little town will somehow have your going-ons back to James in no time. 

“Heat up breakfast and I’ll make us coffee.” James is back down in ten minutes, showered and changed into his wranglers, a thin white t-shirt and his work boots. 

You’re sure you’ve got yours around here somewhere.

James and you work like a well greased machine, making breakfast and coffee and doing the dishes all in one go. 

He tilts his head to the screen door in the kitchen that leads to his side porch.  

“Wanna watch the sunrise with me and then go round do some ranch chores?” 

“Still got my boots in the coat closet?” you ask and James rolls his eyes. 

“When has anything of yours left this house? You’re everywhere in here.” His gaze is too intense for you to laugh it off. It also makes you feel like you’ve caged race horses in your stomach and they’re butting their fences. 

“You say that like it’s a bad thing, Jamie.” is all you can manage before going in search of your boots.

James doesn’t think it’s a bad thing at all. Honestly, he wishes there were more of you in his house; he’s just not sure if saying that to you will cost him everything. 

Shoving your feet into the boots you sigh, then take a peek out at the sky and shiver. “I’m taking a coat.”

“Take anything you want.” 

This is why you can’t tell James about your money troubles. He’s going to give you anything to turn it around, but you’re not sure if anything he can give will. You also can’t use him anymore than you already do. 

“Race you to the stables!” James takes off before you can even put down your empty mug. 

“You’re such a cheater!” You whine as you race behind him, his laugh floating back to you as you reach the stable doors. 

“Takes one to know one,” he says playfully, causing you to roll your eyes.

James holds the door open for you and as soon as you get in you head for Snowglobe. 

“My baby,”  you coo, already kissing the side of his face while James lets his own horse, Landslide, out.  

“You’d swear he wasn’t nearly twenty three.”

“Don’t remind me Jamie.” you grab a brush and go through the usual maintenance just as James does with his horse. 

“We’re riding up to the fences to check on the horses, then we’re feeding them.” James talks about his day like it’s easy, but you remember the hard work that goes into ranching. You’ve got your work cut out for you, and you’re not even doing the hard stuff like moving hay or any of that. 

“Lead the way, Cowboy.” 

After a couple hours, you go back to the big house and take a shower, well and truly exhausted. James wouldn’t let you haul hay, so you’d been feeding the animals, cleaning the stables and doing a bit of general cleaning up around the ranch while he and his farmhands mended parts of the fence, herded the cows and hauled the dried heaps of hay. 

By the time James comes in, you’re halfway through preparing dinner- beef stew. 

“I would’ve cooked after my shower, darling.” James says as he hangs up his hat and boots. 

“Yeah, but now by the time you come back down, we can eat together.” 

James frowns again, you’ve never been away from TSG for this long since it’s been opened and it’s worrying him that you won’t talk to him about it. 

If he’s honest, you haven’t gushed about the inn since you left it yesterday- which is very unlike you. That place is your pride and joy and everyone knows it. Especially James. 

He holds his tongue on his worry and nods. 

“I’ll be back in ten.” 

Through dinner, you’re on your phone, checking your accounts, trying to see where you can make more money or if you’ll have to do the one thing you don’t want to. 

After your sixth sigh in ten minutes, James sets his cutlery down and reaches a hand for you.

“Darling, I know you said it’s nothing, but it’s clearly not. Can you tell me what’s wrong, please?”

Before you can answer, Sirius bursts through James’ house. 

“Did you see TSG’s been closed all day? Wonder if everything’s okay.” 

You freeze in your seat when James turns to you with wide eyes and a slack jaw. 

Sirius coughs to dispel his embarrassment. “Sorry doll face. But why are you closed? Is everything alright?” 

You can’t even be upset with Sirius because for all of his faults, he’s always concerned about you. He feels very much like an older brother in that way, even when he’s giving you shit. 

You rest your head on the table and sigh. 

“Don’t be upset Jamie,” you start, slow and more than a little nervous. You don’t know how you’ll feel if James is angry with you. You don’t want to feel like a failure to him. You don’t want to fail yourself even more. 

“I think I’m gonna have to close the inn.” 

Sirius gasps, James frowns. “Forever or for a while?” 

You lift your head, “For a while. I’m not sure how long. I’ve got to go over the account but we’re not making a profit right now.” 

“Darling,” he says at the same time Sirius swears. 

Tears spring in your eyes. “I know, it hasn’t been making profit or any sort of money for a couple months but I thought it would pick up again, but I guess late summer is not our season.” 

James stands quickly when your first tear falls and Sirius ruffles your head. 

“There’s nothing to be ashamed about, it happens. I can help you work through it.” You shake your head at James’ proposal. 

“You helped me start it up and I can’t even keep it running through the entire year. I can’t expect you to help me every year that I have a slow period.” 

Sirius tuts, “You could always sell your bakes in the off time, dollface.” 

James wipes your tears away, “I can still help. I don’t mind helping out.” 

You shake your head. Sirius seems to get it before James does, and what it is you’re trying to say. 

“No Jamie, I think maybe working on the ranch or doing a little baking on the side would be good. Right doll?” 

You nod, “I don’t wanna keep using you Jamie.” 

James tuts, tilting your chin up. Sirius takes his cue and goes into the kitchen, looking through James’ pantry. 

“You don’t use me. You’ve never used me.” It’s hard to argue with James when he speaks with such conviction but you know you have. 

“But I did. When I was opening up TSG, it was you helping me.” 

James smiles then, “Yeah I helped, darling. It was a mutual thing. We’re friends, of course I helped you. And I can help again, but if you want to do this part on your own, I’d get it.” 

James wipes your tears, gentle and sweet as ever. “I need to go do a final closing for the season and set some things in place, but can I stay here in the meantime?” You force the words out, soft and whispered against the space between you and James. 

“You can stay here as long as you like,” 

“Thanks Jamie.” 

He shrugs, dimple poking out in his cheek as he smiles at you. “You’re always welcome darling, c’mon I’ll drive you to TSG and help with lock up.” 

As it turns out, telling James you’d been struggling wasn’t that bad. It was hard and you’d felt like a failure for a little bit, but he talked good sense into you and now you’re staying with him till the start of autumn. 

“I can work the ranch, Jamie.” You proposed on your second night on his sofa. 

“You cannot work the entire ranch.” James wasn’t even being funny about it either. You really can’t. You get cut up easily and you blister worse than he does. 

“Okay, I can work the stables.” 

James rolls his eyes good naturedly, tossing a bit of popcorn at you. You’d both been watching a new horror that James had seen advertising. Watching is a generous word because you both talk through all the dull parts and you squeeze his fingers in anxiety during the freaky parts. 

“As opposed to?” 

You giggle, “Hey, I can work the garden or help milk the cows.” 

James chuckles then, his dimple on display making you want to poke your finger in it. “Same cows you’re afraid of? You can work the stables darling, you know your way around it.” 

You squeal, leaning up and closer to James to kiss his cheek. You love doing it because James goes red hot and can’t stop his flush. Even as kids he’d go beet red the minute you gave him a kiss to his cheek. 

“You’re the best James. The best ever.” 

He grins, “I’m glad you finally noticed.” The pillow behind your head whacks him in the face as you groan. 

“That was yuck, don’t ever say that again.” James laughs through your disgust, slotting your pillow behind your back again and holding your feet in his lap as the horror builds. 

[trendywaifus]

2024 HALLOWEEN SPECIAL MASTERLIST

❝ WHAT’S YOUR SCARY MOVIE? ❞

WARNINGS — DARK THEMES, MENTIONS OF DEPRESSION, ATTEMPT OF SELF INJURY, DEATH, BLOOD, CONTROLLING BEHAVIOR, INJURY, YANDERE THEMES, DUBCON, PURITY LOSS, CREAMPIE, ORAL FIXATION, VAGINAL PENETRATION, SIZE KINK, CUM–EATING, FINGERING, CUNNILINGUS, UNPROTECTED SEX

04 |SCREAMPIED ! — transfem! ghostface! feixiao x fem! reader. there seems to be a second serial killer who has their eyes on you. but it seems like they came for you for a different reason. will they be a failure like the last one was? (10/6) continuation of — i’m like the wind baby !

preview ↳ you angrily picked up your phone for the third time in two hours, draping the towel over your shoulder as you sat down on the sofa. “ this is the third fucking time you called my damn phone, “ you shouted, pausing some cheesy horror movie that you forgot was on while taking a quick shower, “ take a hike you fuckin’ bum! don’t ask me about what my damn favorite scary movie is because i don’t have one! the last one was somehow less annoying than you are! “

there’s a small pause from the other side along with consistent, wet noises of skin slapping against skin. “ . . .fuck, “ the husky voice lets out a strained groan and laughs breathily, “ keep talking, i’m almost finished. mm, you sound so fucking hot when you’re upset, doll face.”

“ what the fuck? are you getting off from my voice, you damn weirdo? fuck off. “

05 |NATURAL PREDATOR ! — serial killer! jane doe x fem! reader. she craves you and the normalcy you bring into her life. it wouldn’t hurt to preserve it by keeping you in her home. don’t worry, she won’t hurt you if you don’t hurt her. rats aren’t natural predators after all, right? (10/26)

preview ↳ you swat the chinese food aside in frustration, jumping up from your seat, and glared at your unamused kidnapper sitting on the other side of the table. “ is this some sick game to you? chasing, kidnapping me—taking me away from my life to satisfy yours? “ you hiccuped, tears swelling in your eyes. “ and why in the actual fuck do you think it’s okay to make me sit down with you and eat some takeout food after you’ve been gone all day? what, you expect me to “gossip” with you after all the shit you’ve done to me? “

hurt flash in her teal eyes before she sighs heavily. “ do we seriously have to keep coming back to that? i understand that you’re upset but you’ll get use to this, to me soon enough. i know that i haven’t been here lately and i’m sorry. i’ll do my best to come home to you as early as i can. here, “ she says apologetically, handing you a napkin across the table with the pointed end of her tail, “ please, sit down, wipe your tears, and eat your food, my dear. unless, you prefer for me to do all of them for you? “ there’s something dark lurking behind her voice as it lowers an octave. a shiver runs down your spine at the hooded look in her narrowed eyes.

06 |ADAM & EVE ! — yandere! robin x gn! reader. all she wanted was to save her brother. even if it meant taking a bite from the forbidden fruit, stripping her away from reason, her purity—what makes her robin; an internal separation from who she used to be. ( 10/31)

preview ↳ robin straddles your lap, her darkened emerald eyes pools into yours, lulling you deeper into a trance-like state. your body feels relaxed and heavy, bones softening like malleable metal. the halovian woman lean close to you with a sickeningly sweet smile on her pale features as she brings the bitten apple to your bruised lips. there’s voices—hushed whispers ringing in your head, commanding you to take a bite of the apple. you don’t fight them back, you can’t. lust, euphoria and her hypnotic tune clouds your judgement.

you bite into the apple and sink further into the abyss, along with the shell of a woman who used to be great.

07 (BONUS?)| WUTIWANT ! — jason! transfem! acheron x fem! reader. i don’t know what i want but i know it’s not this. these words mean nothing once they’ve left my lips. (??)

preview ↳ ???

[rainbowsky]

Hi RBS! I felt very moved and inspired by their individual stories and their love. So much that it’s given me more motivation in my own life, hoping to develop some of the amazing qualities I see in them. To be able to put in the dedication and work to be the best you can be, to fight for your passions and your person, and to pick yourself up after failure when you need to without letting it break you – that’s very much a person I’d like to be.

So I wanted to ask: Have they/their relationship inspired you in your on life?

Hi blah-bla-blah!

Far be it from me to answer a fun, simple question with a fun, simple answer! 😅

Thanks for the question, I hope you're well! You're right, those are good qualities to have, and I'm glad you've been inspired to become a better version of yourself.

I think this is an interesting question for every turtle to ponder. Not only is it fun/valuable to reflect on how GG and DD have inspired us, but I think it's equally important to have some self-reflection around what we get out of fandom and out of following them.

It's easy to get caught up in fandom and in beautiful pictures and exciting stories and lose sight of where we are in all of this.

I want to be a better person and live a better life, and I equally want to make sure I'm not doing anything harmful or losing sight of what's important both as an individual and as a fan.

So here's the honest truth on that.

The good

On a personal level, GG and DD have had a huge impact on my life and on my perspective. Most of that impact has been due to who they are, where they're from and what they create rather than anything to do with their relationship or 'their love'.

Yes, like most turtles I find GG and DD's devotion to each other and their incredible alignment and rapport with each other very unique, sweet and even entertaining - especially their bickering in multiple languages and through cryptic references - but that's not by any means the biggest impact they've had on me.

Probably because I define 'impacts' as 'factors that have changed something fundamentally about me or my life'.

Here are some of the most positive impacts:

Expanding my horizons

Since becoming a fan of GG and DD I've noticed that my world and my mind have expanded dramatically on multiple fronts. I have been inspired to dig deeply into Chinese social and political topics, history, culture, queer issues, human rights, etc. and I've become a bit of a scholar on all of that (and by 'scholar' I mean 'someone who strives to learn as much as possible' not 'someone who knows a lot').

And I have learned a lot about China and many topics as they pertain to China, but by extension I've also learned a lot more about that entire region of the world - the political, social and historical realities, the cities and geography, the languages and cultures, the landscape of queer rights, queer acceptance and queer culture, etc. And as someone who was already interested in Asian countries and cultures, it's been humbling to realize how little I actually knew/know.

It has enriched my life immeasurably to have these topics become a deep interest of mine.

Fan fiction

Another really great thing that's come out of my interest in GG and DD is that I've developed an appreciation for and an interest in fan fiction - which has in turn enriched my life in so many ways:

It's given me a new perspective on remixing culture and a newfound respect and admiration for one of the most maligned and marginalized art forms on the planet. I strongly feel most of the hate fanfic gets comes directly out of misogyny as channelled through the more socially acceptable vectors of queerphobia/kinkphobia. I can't help but compare remix culture in male-dominated musical spaces with remix culture in female-dominated fandom and literary spaces, and look critically at how differently they are treated in our society. How differently they are valued, perceived and discussed.

It has given me an entirely new insight into writing and into how to improve writing. Almost all the published material that exists in the world is heavily edited and highly polished, so that we're rarely put in a position to be exposed to a lot of amateur writing. Reading so much amateur - often somewhat raw - writing has enabled me to get a much fuller picture of the structures of storytelling and of what works and doesn't work for me, which has had a positive impact on my writing and on my attitude toward storytelling.

Reading a broad range of stories has really opened my mind about a lot of things I used to have a bit of a closed-minded attitude about. ABO, for example, used to creep me out. Now I find the ways this genre examines and subverts social structures extremely interesting and compelling (although there are still limits to my appreciation of the genre).

I've also learned more about myself and my kinks through reading fan fiction. I have had the occasional moment of self-discovery from reading stories that feature so many different relationships and dynamics, and that go to so many unique lengths to explore and subvert social and sexual norms. This is part of why I feel so strongly that the exploration people do via reading and writing fanfic is deeply important, even if authors and readers don't always set out to have a 'meaningful journey' when they write/read a particular story. And once an interest has been sparked, there are dozens, hundreds - in some cases even thousands - of stories to be found that explore or examine that angle/topic.

One good example of this is just the idea of romantic/sweet stories in general. I have never been particularly interested in such things. I consider myself to be pretty unromantic. I'm not even much of a romcom guy. My partner likes romcoms, and I generally just 'tolerate' them when he puts one on. If someone told me prior to getting into this fandom that one day I'd spend a lot of time reading romance stories I would have thought they were trolling me, but here I am voraciously reading about how a cafe barista meets a graphic designer and falls in love, or getting excited about the new ER doctor/single dad music teacher story or whatever. 😅

It has also given me an entire community of interesting people to connect with (and a whole new language/way of connecting) that I previously had no idea existed.

The vast majority of the fan fiction I read is WangXian fan fic, but I never in a million years would have started reading fan fic at all if it weren't for GG and DD and my interest in them.

Putting myself out there

I've talked a bit about this in the past, but blogging has been somewhat rehabilitative for me. I tend to keep to myself a lot and I don't generally put myself out there in a public way. IRL I'm quite private and even withdrawn. My interest in GG and DD has given me a venue for being more socially open without making me feel too socially unsafe.

As a result I've made a lot of new friends and I've been able to share my ideas in ways I've never been able to before. Especially on topics like this. I just can't imagine myself ever talking openly about some of the topics I talk about on my blog - particularly some of the topics that are stigmatized or considered to be 'feminine' topics - prior to getting into this fandom.

And because I've been discussing and sharing these topics for so many years, I've become much more comfortable with and open to discussing them IRL. Some of them, anyway. It's progress.

I've also discovered that there are ways to feel socially comfortable, confident and safe in the world. This is huge for me. As an autistic/ADHD queer person I have often felt uncomfortable in social situations, worried about whether I will be misunderstood or put my foot in my mouth. Here I've found people who have a lot of the same issues, and I've mostly been accepted for who I am (although of course I've also had a lot of hate thrown at me).

I've always had 'special interests', but I've rarely ever been able to fully explore them and share them with others. Tumblr has given me a platform/venue to do that, and it's made a huge difference to my life and to my self-acceptance around being different and around having deep interests that others find strange.

Overall, having this blog and sharing these interests has been a massive positive force in my life.

Self-acceptance

Another thing that GG and DD have given me is a better perspective on my own limitations and self-expectations. While a lot of fans say GG and DD inspire them to strive for more, achieve more, etc. - and they do for me as well to some degree - the bigger impact is that they remind me that not everyone is going to be a superstar, and that's OK.

GG and DD have both had support, opportunity and options that I simply didn't have and never will have. I talked about this in a bit more detail in an ask response back in 2020.

Given where I came from and the background I had my achievements are practically miraculous, but they're also very modest. When I look at GG and DD I remind myself of that, and I am able to be more forgiving and accepting toward myself for my perceived shortcomings and limitations.

There are other self-acceptance aspects to this as well. For example, I have always had an attachment to plushies. It's something that I just can't explain and have always been very ashamed and embarrassed about. I always have a favored plushie and I can't get to sleep without one, ever since I was a very small child.

Seeing GG in his airport photos many years ago, he would always be carrying a plushie. He also often had plushies around him in the video diaries that he would post. That meant a lot to me, and helped me heal some of the embarrassment and shame I have had throughout my life.

There are other things like this, often little things that have made me feel like it's okay to do this or it's okay to be that way. Some bigger things as well.

How about DD and his blunt honesty? This is something that I have been maligned for throughout my life. When I was a little little kid, my mother used to warn people who came to the house, "Be careful, he says what he thinks!"

Throughout my life, especially considering that I have been different from other people in ways that I can't always hide or fly under the radar about, there has frequently been a pitchfork-wielding sort of mob attitude toward how I express myself. I have often been misunderstood, singled out and demonized for simply being an honest person.

I see that this happens a lot to DD as well. People, especially people who are negatively predisposed to him for one reason or another, frequently interpret him as rude, or disrespectful, or savage. It's heartbreaking, because he's such a deeply respectful, kind-hearted person.

I cannot possibly overstate how much I treasure this about him, his personality and the way he expresses himself. I have felt like a horrible person for so long, and watching him makes me see myself through another lens and realize that I'm not that horrible person I've been taught to think of myself as.

So yeah, there are some personal ways that watching them has led to self-acceptance that I never thought I would find.

Other artists

Being a fan of GG and DD has exposed me to a lot of artists actors, musicians, etc that I would never have otherwise learned about. Some of whom are a huge inspiration to me in their own right (Seungyoun, Zhou Shen and Ayunga immediately come to mind).

This has been a huge blessing to my life. I feel so grateful for all of the new artists and creators that I have discovered through my love of GG and DD.

Turtles

Of course I cannot fail to mention all of the ways in which turtles inspire me. They are such a fun, humorous, mostly humble and sweet group of people. So much incredible creativity and so many people who are full of love and enthusiasm. All of the great works of charity that are done in GG and DD's names as well. Their ingenuity and cleverness and wit. C-turtles especially can be truly brilliant and hilarious in ways that are often totally new to me.

And turtles have brought this fascinating language of clownery, fake rumors, detective work and insightfulness that I find so enjoyable to be a part of.

The dolls. Let's not forget the dolls. I never would have thought that I would be interested in dolls at this stage in my life, but I absolutely love all of the dolls and the little outfits and the fictional GGDD offspring, Zhanbi and Bobi, all of pairings of all of their drama characters... It is all just so much fun to be a part of.

Turtles and GGDD have also helped me to get through some of the most difficult times of my entire life. Through deaths of people close to me, through a freaking pandemic, through wars and disasters and climate change and political horrors, through some pretty deep personal lows. I feel so grateful to have had GG and DD and all of my friends and fellow turtles who have helped me survive all this darkness, and who have shared a lot of the brightest moments with me.

The bad (and grey)

Like I just said, as a ND person I tend to get immersed in special interests, and while this fandom and this blog have mostly been a positive way for me to do that, there has been a downside to it. I spend a lot of time with these topics - not just GG and DD but all the topics that have sparked my interest via this fandom: Chinese/Asian politics and queer rights, fandom topics, fan fiction, etc. etc. - and this exploration inevitably happens at the expense of some of my other goals and interests.

I used to spend a lot of time on creative projects, for example, but it's been ages since I've worked on any projects, and even longer since I've finished one. There is only so much time in a day, and every hour I spend with fandom interests is an hour I don't have for something else.

It has also at times negatively impacted my relationships, and I've been actively trying to prioritize them more, which means even more sacrifices of other things.

That's why sometimes you'll see me be very active here, and other times I will be much less active. It's why I can start posts but have a hard time finishing them (my drafts folder is shocking, trust me - you'd be genuinely shocked at how many lengthy posts, reviews, years old ask responses, etc. that are nearly finished but not ready to publish).

I'm not great at finding balance with things like this, and I struggle to keep organized and focused, especially when I have outside demands being made of me that conflict with some of my other interests.

Anyone who's read my blog knows that I can be preachy at times. I'm aware of that, and I actively try not to be so tedious.

But I'm also a bit preachy in my life outside fandom, toward people who say and believe ridiculous shit about China/Chinese people. There's so much Sinophobic propaganda hammered into everyone in the West, it's appalling. I have always been intolerant of any whiff of racism or xenophobia in myself and those around me, but since becoming a fan of GG and DD I've become somewhat of an unapologetic asshole about these things.

I just get so sick of hearing anti-China commentary, I have no patience for it at all. NO, I'm not by any stretch of the imagination a China cheerleader. I'm actually pretty brutally critical of China on many levels - particularly of the CCP - and I cringe when I hear naive people parrot CCP propaganda. But it's kind of alarming how uncritically people accept what they are told about people and situations they know nothing about.

And yeah, on some levels this is a really good thing. People should be challenged on their incorrect or harmful ideas. But overall it's added some friction and conflict to my life that wasn't there before.

It's also fucked up my sleep a lot. As an insomniac and as an autistic person I need a very consistent sleep schedule - ideally one that aligns with the sleep/wake schedule of those around me - or a lot of bad things will happen for me.

Insomnia tends to have a snowball effect in my life, and if I don't get enough sleep one night it's twice as hard to get sleep the next night, and so on and so on. That in turn has a big negative impact on my ability to handle stress and overstimulation, to focus, to stay organized, etc..

Being a fan of Chinese superstars has mercilessly fucked with this on a regular basis. It's pretty hard to stick to a healthy sleep schedule when I'm following events that are happening in a distant time zone. I've become a lot better with this lately, but again - that comes at a sacrifice. When I'm getting 8 hours of sleep a night instead of 3, those hours have to come from somewhere.

The ugly

I have become a target for hate in ways that are often really hard to avoid. This is somewhat inevitable. Anyone who puts themselves out there in any way - no matter how well-intended - will find themselves the target of hate and harassment from someone somewhere.

And it just so happens that there are some features of this fandom that make it a particularly compelling target for some people. The fact that it's a fandom, the fact that it involves queer topics, the fact that it involves real people, the fact that there are rivalries, the fact that it involves discussing ideas some people might find challenging or offensive. The fact that so much of it is a matter of opinion, and I am daring to express mine.

And being targeted is difficult for me. I grew up being viciously bullied throughout my life. People used to call me names, throw stuff at me, spread hateful lies about me, even physically attack me, right from childhood into adulthood. Being different - especially where I was from - was not acceptable, and I was different in so many visible ways.

So while I've gotten much better at handling this kind of thing (and that should really be added to the 'good' list above), it isn't without its harms. Closing my anonymous inbox has massively improved things, but haters will unfortunately always be a fixture as long as I continue in this fandom.

Another impact that falls in the 'ugly' category for me is the fact that I almost never read non-fandom content anymore. I used to voraciously read literature and a wide range of non-fiction books, at a very high volume. I rarely do anymore. When I read it's usually fan fiction or else something fandom-related. I feel this has rotted my brain a bit, let's be real.

However, as I said before, fan fiction and this fandom in general has enriched my life in a lot of positive ways, so it's not all bad. But it does bother me.

It's just the way my brain is wired - it has become much harder for me to get into things that aren't directly related to my interests. I also find that fan fiction feels safe and soothing - something that I often need as a trauma survivor, autistic/ADHD person, etc.

I have to regularly evaluate where I am with all of this, and make adjustments to ensure I've got time for IRL commitments, 'regular' reading/viewing topics, etc. and that balance is not always easy.

What about love?

This is what a lot of turtles talk about when it comes to GG and DD, and I suppose it does apply to me here. They've definitely had an impact on how I view romance, and my own relationship.

I guess I could say I've become more patient and less complacent. I look at our disagreements more affectionately as bickering, and don't read too much into them or let them fester. I take more notice of our compatibilities and accomplishments.

I've always been the sort of person who needs/expects independence in a relationship. A relationship is always made up of individuals. I believe that two people who foster each other's independence and individuality are going to thrive and maintain their interest/satisfaction with each other better than those who focus unduly on the 'relationship' as some sort of third party entity.

It inspires me when I see GG and DD doing what I perceive to be the same thing. They're out there taking their own paths and doing their own things, while supporting and appreciating each other and sharing all the ways in which they're compatible. That's what a truly healthy relationship looks like IMHO.

I've always been this way myself, but watching GG and DD makes me appreciate it more than I used to. It also makes me want to protect and preserve that aspect of myself and my relationship, because I can see how important it is to a truly companionable, loving connection.

I think of DD saying, "Miss me later" and I laugh, because that's exactly how I am (yet according to GG he's 'more clingy than Jianguo' 😅). I think it's possible to go out in the world and live your life as an individual, while sharing a private internal world with someone you love. To me that's the ideal.

Some of the best for last

One of the biggest and best impacts GG and DD have had on me has come through their creative works. I can't overstate how much I love and appreciate the work they do. Especially their music, and for DD, his dance (although their acting projects have also been great to watch and follow).

It's often a source of frustration for me that the projects that have impacted me the most are the ones that I struggle to write about on my blog. With the exception of Stand Up and some other bits and pieces here and there, I don't think I've ever been able to fully articulate my feelings about the projects that have touched me the most.

I have a huge long post still in my drafts about Like the Sunshine. That is a song and dance performance that can't even re-watch or re-listen to because it hits me so hard. The song came out years ago and I still haven't finished that post.

Similarly, Hidden Blade was so inspiring to me in how DD tackled that role and really brought his character to life. I was completely blown away by that performance.

WM hit me like a freight train, and I really want and intend to write a full and thorough review of the entire album and all of the video content (and the physical album if/when it ever arrives), but I haven't been able to even make a proper start.

I also have so many feelings and thoughts about the career choices they have been making, especially DD, who I could not be prouder of. I have written a bit about some of that, but I haven't even hit the tip of the iceberg of how much it all inspires me.

All I can say is, I'm here because I get something very important out of following them and out of sharing my thoughts and feelings about them. They both mean a hell of a lot to me, and I have a lot of fun and learn a lot of new things and see a lot of new perspectives that inspire me through being a fan of theirs.

I also just really appreciate all of you who read and engage with my blog, and who interact with me - whether to challenge me or praise me, either is fine. I just really value that a lot. I feel inspired by the ideas people share with me and by the opportunity to (hopefully) contribute in some way to a positive fandom experience for others.

And I have a few very close friends here who mean the world to me. I truly treasure all of them.

I could go on and on. This is a question that sparks a lot of thoughts and feelings.

I know this has gotten very long-winded, and I will understand if 90% of you have not gotten far enough to read this sentence, but to all of you (whether you got this far or not), thanks so much.

May we all continue to enjoy everything that GG and DD have brought into our lives, and all the ways that they have brought us together. 💛.

I would love it if my readers could share some of the ways that GG and DD and turtles have inspired you. I'd love to hear some of your stories!

There is a somewhat related post about how I deal with people's reactions IRL to my interest in fandom, which you can find here.

[moeitsu]

Logan Howlett (Wolverine) Lore part 2 :)

Wow! You guys really appreciated my first post about Logan's backstory/lore and I'm grateful for all of your feedback!! Here's the link to part 1 if you're interested :)

I'm so happy to see all the love he's getting, its actually surreal to be a part of this fandom again and seeing all the new Wolverine content! The fanart and fanfics are literally my life-source rn. You don't even wanna know what my tiktok saved folder looks like....

You guys asked for more so here is part 2! It's not as organized as the first part, apologies. I'm using both the movies and comics here. Some stuff isn't confirmed but generally accepted in the mcu.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

Wolverine first appeared in The Incredible Hulk #180. He was supposed to be a mutated human/animal but the idea was later scrapped.

He was approx. 197 years old when he died in the movie 'Logan'

There's multiple different deaths in the comics but I wont get into that.

Logan is 5'3"- 5'5" (short king)

He has black hair and blue eyes

Before the adamantium, he weighed 196lbs (88kg). After the binding he was 300lbs (136kg)

His body is poisoned by the adamantium metal as it breaks down over time. Requiring him to be in a constant state of regeneration, which begins to slow down as he ages.

Without the metal he probably could have lived a lot longer.

Logan has a fear of water, or rather, drowning. It’s one of the only times can’t regenerate. It would cause his death.

The Weapon X program is also responsible for this fear since he was submerged under water for a long period of time for the binding.

The metal in his body also makes him so heavy it would be very difficult for him to swim.

In the comics Logan temporarily loses his healing factor due to a virus created by Dr. Abraham Cornelius. (Weapon X scientist) This event leaves him vulnerable for the first time in his life, forcing him to confront the reality of his mortality.

His healing ability greatly affects his mental state. Logan can quickly recover from physical damage, but he still feels all the pain. His ability to cope and endure despite the overwhelming suffering is central to his character.

Logan has an acute sense of smell. He can track people and objects across a great distance. It’s so precise that he can identify people’s emotional states such as fear or anger. Even when someone is lying.

Logan was sensitive, shy, and timid as a child.

The first person he ever killed was his biological father.

After killing his father he ran away from home with his friend Rose. (a hired companion to help care for him when he was young). Unfortunately, Logan accidently killed her during a fight.

Logan speaks several languages, due to his extensive life and travels. He speaks English, Japanese, Russian, Spanish, Chinese, Cheyenne and Lakota.

He’s actually an incredibly smart guy, don’t let him fool you.

Despite his love for alcohol, Logan’s healing factor makes it nearly impossible for him to get drunk.

Logan brews his own beer in the Origins comics. (we love a domestic husband)

On Logan’s birthday every year, Sabretooth seeks him out just to beat him up as a twisted "gift." Sabretooth calls this tradition "birthday beatings."

Spider-Man and Wolverine have teamed up a few times in the comics and they are a hilarious pair.

Logan's "berserker rage" is not just a result of his animalistic mutant powers. But stems from his deep psychological trauma. This side of him only emerges when he is pushed into extreme emotional or physical stress.

At one point before he escaped the Weapon X experiment, he was hired to kill Charles Xavier.

Logan's wife Itsu and son Daken were allegedly killed by the Winter Soldier, however it was later revealed that his son actually lived and had been consumed by hatred for his father. Logan was forced to kill his own son before he could cause more harm.

This act is one of, if not the most painful moment in Logan’s life, as it represents his ultimate failure as a father.

Logan blames himself for Jean Grey’s death.

He lived a majority of his life without his memories. Having no idea who he actually is.

Despite his involvement with the X-Men and his many close relationships he often feels like an outsider. Like he doesn’t belong anywhere. He isolates himself because loneliness is a familiar feeling.

Logan prefers the solitude and sanctity of nature. He loves the outdoors and has a lot of respect for the natural world. Often retreating into the wild for his own peace.

In one comic he baby sits Luke Cage and Jessica Jones daughter. Danielle Cage.

He can be quite playful at times with the younger mutants. For example, building a snowman with Jubilee.

Logan dreams of a normal life. He dreams of having a family with a wife and children and leaving the violence behind.

[tigerator]

i started up a new sims 3 file. nothing too crazy but i made a sim, decided to make that sim a genie cause i thought it'd be cool. it isn't. but i do have the power to banish sims to somewhere.

i enabled the roommates function and the game immediately had seven whole sims arrive at my house to live in it with me. seven roommates! like, jesus christ. and it feels like none of them work, they just hang around at the house all day. at least they pay some small amount of rent each week and they keep things interesting, so i haven't kicked them all out yet.

rachel is having a birthday in a few days. i do not know who this is.

my sim invents a drill and starts drilling in the garden, a function i didn't know existed. turns out that he can get ores and stuff doing this which is pretty cool.

every single sim in the neighbourhood has an opinion about this. everyone in the house bolts outside to tell me how much they love or hate the drill. people are flooding from neighbouring houses. a french tourist showed up to tell me how much he loved my drill. a chinese tourist showed up to tell me how much she hated my drill.

i banished every single one of them. i think banishment sends them back to their homes. but i don't actually know. i move the drill to the back yard instead of the front yard, where there's fences to keep strangers out. at least this way they can't come tell me their opinions about my cool drill next time i'm drilling. this leaves a huge hole in the front yard. it's fine.

the game keeps prompting me to throw rachel a birthday party. i didn't even know who that is. turns out it's one of my tenant roommates. anyway, her birthday rolls around and i decide to throw a birthday party because it'd be funny.

i invite every elderly person in the neighbourhood to her birthday party to remind her that she's getting older and will die soon and quite purposely exclude her best friend because i'm the only person in the world who knows how to play the sims 3.

i decorate the house. i buy her a cake. the party starts, people show up. my sim pops up with the action to tell off a guest for bad behaviour or something, which i allow to happen because i figure it'll be funny.

my sim leaves. he leaves the home. he gets on his bike and rides all the way down to the gym down the street to tell a perfect stranger that they're acting inappropriately.

you know who else is there? for some reason, rachel. the party's roaring at my house and she's not even there. it's possible i forgot to invite her to her own birthday party. anyway, i banish her so she gets sent back home to her birthday party and then i return home. she isn't there. i don't know where she's gone.

at this point i'm waiting for rachel to come back so i start filling in the hole in the front yard. it's her birthday party and she's missing it, partially because i forgot to invite her to it and partially because i banished her to somewhere unknown. so far for the entire duration of this house party all i've done is go to the gym, harass a perfect stranger, send the birthday girl to hell, then come home and fill in a hole that's so deep it provoked a sim from china to travel to my house to tell me how much she hated it.

guests start filing out. "great party", they keep telling me. "it's time for me to go, but i had a blast". all my decorations and music and hot tub seem to have done the trick and everyone had a great time at the party, which is excellent. if nothing else, i'm going to get a great score at party.

a message pops up in the top right corner. rachel's birthday party was a "complete failure" because "noone aged" during it. my sim gets a negative moodlet for throwing an embarrassing party and everyone else gets a positive one for attending a cool party.

rachel still isn't home yet.

[lisbeth-kk]

Sherlock fandom.

Constant Failure

They are handpicked by the master himself. The spider. The consulting criminal. The arch enemy of Sherlock Holmes.

James Moriarty strips them of their personalities without asking permission. 

“From now on, you’re just a number. One, seven, ten. Don’t even think about asking why I’ve chosen them. You’re not paid to ask questions.”

His voice is void of emotions. Cold, detached, indifferent. A machine. But if they listen closely, the passion underneath is discernible.

***

Their first failure is only noticed by the three of them, and of course their employer. The cabbie, Jeff Hope, is not supposed to be killed by Sherlock Holmes’ flatmate. Moriarty is livid.

“Who of you failed to register that he followed Holmes? How did you not know he was a crack shot?”

None of them points out that it is Moriarty himself that has done the research. The trio only got information about what was expected to happen. Their job was to ensure that Sherlock Holmes would be the cabbie’s next victim.

“He looks like a nobody!” the mastermind hisses. “He’s nothing like Holmes at all. How does he put up with that unassuming man?”

Number Seven smirks discreetly. The jealousy is evident in the spider’s voice.

***

Their second failure is ensured when Holmes outsmarts them all. He comes to the doctor’s rescue in a tunnel, where he is supposed to be killed by a bunch of Chinese ruffians. 

How the detective managed to sneak past them, is a mystery. They watched the tunnel opening with keen eyes, in their hands were weapons to fire as they pleased. Moriarty didn’t care how many casualties they left behind, as long as the residents of 221B Baker Street were eliminated.

Again, their employer puts all the blame on them, even though he had the blueprints of the tunnel, which he didn’t bother showing them.

“Neither of you saw the hidden door? Don’t you know how ingenious Sherlock Holmes is? This is not a job to be taken lightly! You must be two steps ahead of him at all times. Imbeciles!”

Number One tries to point out how much easier that would’ve been if they’d seen the layout of the premises, but he only gets a deadly glare in response.

James Moriarty is clearly not a fan of legwork, or sharing his plans with people he doesn’t even bother learning the names of.

***

The third time they fail, is the first time they come in close contact with the pair they’re supposed to eliminate. 

If it had been up to the trio, they’d just killed them outright without further ado, but of course, it never is that simple when James Moriarty calls the shots.

“He needs to open the safe first. This is crucial. When the contents of Ms Adler’s safe is secure in your hands, go wild.”

The mad glint in the Irishman’s eyes, makes them all shudder, but they don’t hesitate. The reward is too good to give up just yet.

“Vatican cameos,” Holmes yells, and all hell breaks loose.

When they wake, they’re alone in the grand townhouse, and the safe is empty.

The scolding they get from Moriarty this time, makes them feel like schoolboys again, standing in front of the headmaster’s desk. 

“You’re just a bunch of losers! A cursed trio. How difficult can it be? I’ll give you one more chance, but don’t think for a second, you’ll get any money if you so much as blink at the wrong moment.”

Jointly they decide that enough is enough.

***

The fourth time, they fail deliberately. Number Ten hides on the roof where Holmes meets Moriarty. When he blows his head off in front of a shocked consulting detective, Number Ten calls off the other snipers. Their hated boss is dead and can’t create havoc anymore. The money will never reach their pockets. It’s time to put a stop to the madness of the spider, and to save Sherlock Holmes and John Watson.

“I’ve called it off. There are no snipers. You don’t have to jump,” the man says when he moves towards a pale and terrified Sherlock Holmes.

“How can I trust you?” the baritone voice asks.

As if on cue, the door to the roof opens and John Watson appears. He’s at Holmes’ side at an instant when the detective falls to his knees with relief. 

“Let’s go back to Serbia,” Number Ten says into his walkie-talkie.

Before he opens the door, he looks over his shoulder. Doctor Watson is kneeling too, his arms are wrapped around his best friend, and hopefully soon, lover.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

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[greenunoreversecard]

Kai general and Romantic headcanons

A/N:sorry if I got any of the characters wrong, I was using a combo of wiki/Google translate as I don't speak any of the languages mentioned. Pls let me know if I got any info wrong, i will gladly go in and change it to make it right.

General:

Half Indian and half Chinese.

His and nya's last name is 鄭 (Zheng), but he says it's Smith bc when they where younger he got in the habit of lying about his name so he Didnt have to deal with CPS.

His ma is from Visakhapatnam in Andhra Pradesh, and was a practicing Hindu. Ray is from the 云南 (yunnan) province, and was a practicing theravida Buddhist. Ray is ethnically from the 傣族 (dai people, also spelt Tai in english)

Before his parents dissapearances, they both brought him to their hometowns, and actively taught him both cultures and religions, which he continued to learn about and even teach Nya about after their dissapearances.

When he was 14 he bought a small boat and him and Nya rode it across the costal line, and he promised Nya one day when he was older he'd bring the both of them to their parents hometowns.

He's a Buddhist.

He speaks so many languages.

Like so many

He's fluent in Thai, mandarin and cantonese chinese, telugu, urdu, hindi, Punjabi, arabic and ninjago-ian(idk whatever language ninjago speaks)

Also trying to learn Indonesian.

He also knows yunnan dialect bc his dad would speak in it more often than not

Absorbes info like a sponge

He likes to quilt

He always wears a golden bracelet He got from his moms jewelry box after she left.

Likes to draw but is bad at it, so he colors coloring books

Introvert

He may act all confident, but he really isn't. super insecure

Soooo good with hair

Like, has all the stops. 10 step hair care routine

rivals Zanes cooking skills.

When working out focuses on building rather than lean muscle.

Mother friend

has dragged all of his friends into the water splashing festival.

Fatal flaw is loyalty and kind of hubris (it's conflicting, ik with the insecure and extreme pride, but like- it makes sense in my head. Inferiority/maybe superiority complex.)(it makes sense bc this is such me behavior. Imagine hating yourself but thinking ur the baddest bitch alive)

Likes to stare at fire

If he can't sleep he'll make a small bonfire to stare at and think

insomnia

Chronic cigarette smoker

Romantic:

Hes more show than tell

Def acts of service (me frfr)

Although, he is very cuddly.

Not in public, though. Maybe infront of the other ninja if it was a rough day

Loves to rock you gently from side to side when yall are hug

loves to give you temple kisses

He's very gentle with you, treats you like glass

You wil prolly say ily first, and he'll go;"🧍‍♂️...cool?"

He has mommy and daddy issues, but HEAVY on the mommy issues. Have fun with this hyper-independant fuck who can't accept help without feeling like a failure even though they need it (I'm not projecting you are)

Goes all out for holidays and anniversaries.

Doberman/German Shepard vibes tbh

When it's just you two he doesn't feel the need to fill the air with meaningless chatter, so if he feels safe enough to just share air without talking feel honoured and cherish it bc that means he actually trusts you.

A little rough around the edges, but will remember that thing you said 5years ago on ur first date

Most dates are chill inside and take a nap

But sometimes if he can he takes you on the town or someplace fancy

Also likes to show you his favorite childhood spots

[nyaskitten]

I feel like all the people saying Lego probably would not care enough to get a diverse cast for the ninja forget that, even if mostly just for sales, Lego HAS been trying to diversify itself, lmao.

While a horrific failure, Piece By Piece, the latest Lego movie, still made like a Bunch of new skin tones and pieces specifically for the purpose of being more inclusive. They got Snoop fucking Dogg as a Lego...

With Monkie Kid, Lego has like a large team devoted specifically to cultural accuracy, because of how revered the story they're basing their theme on is, and how important some of these guys are as religious figures.

Literally with Dragons Rising at some point they switched Arin from a white kid witth freckles to a black kid, and made the conscience choice to switch Euphrasia's intended race, lmao.

While these are specifically Lego minifigures and thus easier, you cannot possibly convince me Lego "just doesn't care" about being inclusive lol. Again, even if it's just performative or to drive up toy sales (sans that first example) they still are Doing it and are Aware of it, so truly, sincerely, I'm gonna say for (HOPEFULLY) the last time, there is no way in hell we're getting an all white cast.

I get that they dropped the ball heavy and hard w/ Ninjago because they couldn't be bothered to do cultural accuracy, but fun fact! Writers and executive's opinions, viewpoints, and ideas change after 13+ years! Do I think the racist elements will be Fully gone? No. There's a guy named Wu in a heavily Chinese-inspired series, ffs. Do I think they're gonna make all the ninja white, or get untalented celebrity actors? ALSO NO!!! I think there'll be like a big name celeb or two, but they're not gonna oversaturate the film with that.

Also I don't take arguments on this specific post I'm plugging my ears and running away lalalalalala

[tawked]

I will forever be mad that Morrison's Talia al Ghul wasn't a new character or something.

I absolutely love the idea of a eugenicist cult leader mother of Batman's creepy designer son concept.

I love it because Batman is, when written well imo, in conversation with the concept of policing and societally accommodating disability, particularly mental illness, while having a psychosocial disability of his own. Y'know,

lol.

Writers have diagnosed Batman with a billion things over the years, most obviously PTSD, but they don't even feel that's enough. I've seen Batman diagnosed by writers with everything from obsessive-compulsive disorder to autism. All of his villains have similar disabilities. His world is known for Arkham Asylum far more so than Blackgate Penitentiary. It's all draped in the aesthetics of social dysfunction and gothic "madness."

Slotting not just a eugenicist, but a kind of pro-natalist, designer baby eugenicist into that as not only a villain, but a villain who has used the bat-cum to bioengineer a perfect baby, who she now shunts onto Batman to raise not as a son but as an heir, as a designed being with a specific purpose in mind, held to impossible standards and for whom failure is not so much a reality of childhood but a defect in a design, is such an excellent concept.

It's all very... Elon Musk and his test tube children, y'know? It's all very, the wretched vibes of the modern "we must outbreed the lesser people" pro-natalist test tube baby movement Elon Musk is discretely a part of.

This is a very real, real-life villain movement that actually exists, has existed for decades, and is extremely solid material to pull from if you want to focus on a disability context for these characters lol.

But it's not Talia al Ghul and the fact that it was never Talia al Ghul meant that DC was simply never going to follow through with this concept once the book was out of Morrison's hands.

It's sort of an impossible situation if you want to tell that story (and you should want to because it's a good story) because women in Batman comics, even femme fatales, often aren't provided that level of depth and complexity. Or weren't at the time. Like yes, okay, Pamela wants to do plants on people because she's mad about the brozone layer or whatever, but they wouldn't really backfill her humanity until Gail Simone got hands on her. Who are you going to use? Nocturna? No. Lady Shiva? Actually fuck off.

But if you use an OC, idk, you don't have that spicy drama of the fact that it's Talia, she's back, and she's acting batshit crazy and out of character.

Maybe this all would've worked if Talia wasn't glocked upside the dome at the end. They could've played it off as her going nuts with a combination of Nyssa torturing and Lazarus Pitting her, decades of cult programming and the horror of getting cult brainwashed into fempregging herself. I dunno.

idk. I have this ongoing frustration that I love what Morrison was going for disability-wise, but the path taken was very silly.

Oh also all the bizarre anti-Asian racism in Morrison's run kinda sours all the conversation about eugenics and disability stuff. What the fuck was going on with The Great Ten? Why was this Chinese lady's power having a lot of babies during the One Child Policy criticism era? Why were all their superhero names bad wuxia title translations? Why the fuck did Morrison thing they were the one who could reintroduce Egg Fu and pull that off in a non-offensive way?

idk man.

[brazenautomaton]

I suppose cementing my scornworthy contemptible taste: I did not care for Sinners.

It wasn't scary, it wasn't thrilling, it wasn't surprising, the characters had little to no agency, and I don't think the movie was aware that

it was not actually about music in that music is not important to the plot and things don't substantially happen due to music, and when they did it portrayed music as an almost entirely malign force. It set things up in that literally nothing that happened in the entire movie was a surprise save for the part where you go "Since fucking when does it work like THAT?", yet did not establish ANY of the things that would be necessary to have any of the thematic heft at the ending that it wanted. "He said he wanted the music to see the other side!" the only thing he has cared about for the entire movie was murdering people. "He promised his brother he wouldn't kill Blues McMaincharacter!" since fucking when did any of them care about anything but murdering people and turning them into vampires. The only way music united people was the hive-mind vampires were dancing to music, music that seemed just as sincere and good as Blues McMaincharacter and they enjoyed it just as much, except everyone dancing to it was an evil vampire who wanted to gruesomely murder everyone. There was no kind of conflict with the music, it didn't mean anything different, there was no point where we saw the vampires value the music or feel something from the music until the very end in the part they didn't set up where the main vampire says "The music that you haven't been playing for this entire act of the movie and that hasn't done anything is so good that I will now murder you for it!"

Once the main characters know they are besieged by vampires they do nothing interesting or agentic or clever. There's nothing they have to figure out or adapt to. The only people who live when the evil vampires come in to murder everyone do so because the vampires kind of forget the outnumber the humans like 10 to 1 and can just kill them whenever the fuck they feel like. How did you have time to stake that woman without being devoured by like six dudes at the same time? They don't even set up a trap or make a plan. The Chinese woman just goes "Hey, everyone come in here and kill us before we can agentically affect our situation!"

Why were all of them just hanging around literally 15 seconds before sunrise? Even if you murdered Blues McMaincharacter he wouldn't have had time to turn into a vampire and play the music before you died. So basically, he accomplished nothing, and the blues accomplished nothing, and what the fuck was the point of any of this?

Then he shoots a bunch of Klansmen because I think they realized there was no catharsis in this movie, except they didn't realize that this had absolutely nothing to do with anything that happened. The vampires who were all equal and cared nothing for racial divides and danced to music just like us but also wanted to gruesomely murder everyone are not a stand in for Racism and you don't get closure on your failure to do anything about them by killing a bunch of racists.