#feel free to talk to me about it anytime. idk how to say that ever without sounding annoying but

[gaylittlerichie]

final chapter of crosseyed & painless will be late. i’m only just over halfway thru. so here are no context spoilers:

and here’s a snippet :)

and snippet (evil edition)

[frehyun]

Coffee Machine Love

boyfriend!jisung x afab!reader x coworker!hyunjin

warnings: swearing, threesome, unprotected sex (don't), oral sex (m and f receiving), mxm things, slight bondage, one (1) slap, sub!hyunjin, idk how to label the other two so I'll go with soft switch!jisung, soft switch!reader

genre: fluff, smut, coworker AU

word count: 4.2k

author's note: i'm alive again! Hyunsung has been running rampant on the tour lately so I couldn't resist writing something about them! do not ask me what the project is about, do not ask me what the company is even for, i don't know either, please forgive me 💀 hope you enjoy reading and i'd love to hear your thoughts! <3

masterlist

divider by @firefly-graphics

Your boyfriend was practically trembling beside you as you bite into your sandwich, unbothered by his leg steadily moving up and down. You follow his gaze and weren’t surprised at all when it landed on one of your newer coworkers a few meters away at the coffee machine. If you knew Jisung at all – and you like to think you do – you could guess that his eyes zeroed in on his hands deftly working around the piece of electronics that broke every couple of weeks. His long and slender fingers expertly taking the poor coffee maker apart to fix whatever went wrong this time.

Your gaze travels back to the man beside you and you have to hold back the smirk growing on your face when you see him practically drooling over the other man, probably wishing that the fingers wrestling around with the inner small machinery were wrapped around his neck instead.

“It’s 9 in the morning, relax” – you chuckle and slap your hand on his thigh to wake him up from his stupor.

Jisung gives you an incredulous look, like he can’t believe you’re not as mesmerised by the newest addition to the office as he is. He narrows his eyes at you because he knows he can’t say anything about your betrayal while he was still within hearing distance.

The front cover of the coffee machine clicking back into place makes both of you jump.

“If he’s tense because he hasn’t had any coffee yet, that can be fixed now” – the man of Jisung’s dreams exclaims from across the two of you, his smooth voice like honey.

Now you were swooning too. Great.

Jisung almost chokes on his own spit trying to answer him as fast as possible, waving his hands around in dismissal, “no, no”, he chokes out, “she’s just being silly, I was…uhm- I’m just nervous because of a project. Yeah.”

What the fuck was he talking about? He could’ve just said ‘yes, I need a coffee, thank you so much, man I haven’t asked about his name yet, you really saved my morning, let me thank you by sucking your dick” or whatever and it would have been fine.

Luckily for him, the guy just gives one of the cutest, goofiest smiles you’ve ever seen and it hits you right in the heart. Maybe Jisung was onto something.

“Is that so? Well, if you ever need any assistance, feel free to call on me! They’re barely giving me any work and I’d rather help someone than sit around and do nothing for my remaining work time.”

Jisung nods fervently, stuttering something between ‘yes, oh my god, thank you’ and ‘you’re an angel” but it just comes out as ‘yes, you’re my angel’, making you and him visibly cringe. This couldn’t go any worse.

The guy, however, giggles sweetly as he moves to leave the room and this is the first time you notice how long his legs are, how lanky and tall he is.

“I’m Hyunjin, by the way. My room’s down this hall, I’m sure you can’t miss it. Feel free to stop by anytime!”

He doesn’t wait for either of you to answer or introduce yourselves back to him, so the two of you are left to watch as he strides down the corridor.

“Oh my God, he’s into idiots.”

“He wants me so bad.”

Jisung lightly slaps your shoulder at your remark.

“You liked me first! That says more about you than it says about me!”

You roll your eyes at him and get back to your sandwich before your break is over. Unfortunately, your mind is now also filled with Hyunjin.

The way his hands delicately but deftly repaired the cursed coffee machine.

The way his shirt perfectly spanned over his broad shoulders as he leaned over the counter.

The way his ass looked in his slacks.

And God, when he turned around, his smile making his eyes into little crescent moons, a dimple appearing on the side of his cheek. His full and plush lips. His kind and soft eyes.

You groan into your sandwich and kick at Jisung’s shoe.

“You infected me with the Hyunjin disease, are you proud?” – you say with red-tinted cheeks.

“Extremely. We desperately have to check in with him if he’d be into two people wanting him. But like, in a way that doesn’t scream ‘We’re desperate!!’, you know?”

You can’t help but agree with him.

And so began your and Jisung’s mission to scope out whether Hyunjin would be interested in you two.

You didn’t want to kick down his door and straight up ask him, in case that scared him away, because even if he declined, he seemed like a nice guy and it wouldn’t hurt to have him as a friend. So Jisung and you really did stop by his office later that week to ask for his assistance with a made-up project.

His office only housed him, so he was allowed to decorate it how he wanted to, potted plants scattered around the sunny spots and little trinkets here and there that made the place seem more lived in than any other office you had ever been to. His desk was neat, the pinboard beside it home to various little reminders and sketches presumably made by himself in that endless free time he mentioned. You had to admit that he was quite talented, his pencil lines precise as they combine into the image of a beautiful flower bouquet.

“So, the two of you are on this project, after all? I thought it was just him” – Hyunjin nods towards your boyfriend, who was inspecting a little bear figure on his shelf.

Hyunjin doesn’t seem to mind you two sniffing around the place.

“Because he failed to mention that last time, he got nervous when you caught him off-guard like that” – you sigh and shake your head, leaning back against his desk.

You don’t miss how Hyunjin’s eyes seem to flicker down to where your hips pressed against the wood for just a second and a small smile finds its way onto your lips.

He tilts his head and apologises with a candid smile, saying that he didn’t mean to scare anyone off. If only he knew.

Jisung and you had previously come up with an elaborate plan on what your project entailed. It was a simple project that required a little bit of knowledge from Hyunjin’s division that the two of you weren’t a part of. Easy enough to make it seem like you actually needed his help. Also easy enough to pretend the project was real.

The thought that all of you probably had too much free time on your hands crosses your mind.

“So you just need me to work my magic a little bit and your head of department is gonna be happy?”

“Hopefully!”

“What is this even for? Didn’t we showcase this to upper management a few months back already?”

How did he know that? Why didn’t you think of that? You shift against the desk and Hyunjin’s eyes flit back to you, his gaze now trained on you intently, waiting for your reply.

“They just wanted a redo of the model since the first one got deleted in that data leak a while back” – Jisung lies casually, suddenly disinterested in the décor.

Hyunjin seems to accept that answer as he nods, eyes still on you as if he was gauging your reaction. You shift again under his gaze, looking into his eyes and giving him a slightly shaky smile.

Seemingly satisfied with whatever he was observing, the three of you proceed to go over the rather uninteresting details of what needs to be done.

During your little discussion, Jisung makes a not-so-subtle attempt at situating himself closer to your colleague under the guise of ‘I want to watch you work, it’s fascinating’.

It’s still crazy to you that all of his attempts have worked so far. You’re still close to Hyunjin as well, perched against the corner of his desk, his arm almost brushing against your thigh whenever he needs to reach for something or move the mouse around in a larger motion, mumbling a quiet ‘sorry’ when he does accidentally touch you.

Jisung almost leans on his shoulder with the way he’s sitting so close beside the older man.

While Jisung seems genuinely interested in Hyunjin’s work, you take this opportunity to further check him out as he works. You can’t help but let your gaze linger on his hands again as they work their way across the keyboard, his long fingers flexing to reach the keys.

While having them wrapped around your neck is certainly an enticing idea, you rather wonder what they would look like prettily bound together.

You could swear there was a slight reddish tint to Hyunjin’s neck and ears ever since he was practically caged in by your and Jisung’s body.

You sigh, more to yourself than anything. This was gonna be a long and grueling mission, but at least it didn’t seem like Hyunjin hated being around either of you.

That same evening, you find yourself in your boyfriend’s lap, grinding needily against him, your arms around his neck, while he busied himself biting and licking at the expanse of your skin of your neck.

“He’s really nice” – you suddenly say and Jisung hums in agreement between bites, his hands finding their way to the backs of your thighs, guiding your movements to be harsher against him.

“He was so flustered when you got closer to him, his neck and the tips of his ears all blushy and red” – you ramble on and it seems to spur your boyfriend on, his breathing growing more ragged, his movements more desperate.

“I think he’d rather enjoy being under us than above us, don’t you think? He seemed to lose all his previous bravado when it was just us three in a small space. I bet he’s cute when he’s begging on his knees, just imagine it” – Jisung lets out a broken moan in response, his grinding against you coming to a halt.

“Ah, shit” – he whispers against you and you giggle lightly.

You lean back to take a look at him, his honey skin glistening with a thin layer of sweat. He shyly looks anywhere but you and you take his face into your hands to force him to look at you.

“It’s pretty hot that you came from just that” – you plant a soothing kiss against his lips as he whines about your words. You card your fingers through his hair, softly scraping at his scalp as he’s still slowly coming down from his high.

“I’ll make it up to you” – he murmurs and taps your thighs, signaling you to get off him to return the favor.

And he does make it up to you, his face buried between your legs until you finally reach your high as well, fingers tangled into his hair and pressing him against you.

“We really have to do something about this” – he sighs as the two of you settle down on your bed.

You hum, nuzzling your face further into his chest, too tired to try and come up with a plan on how to break it to Hyunjin softly that two of his coworkers want him romantically and have been lying to him about needing his help.

The next couple of work sessions with Hyunjin were rather uneventful. There were some moments where either Jisung or you got closer to him, ‘accidentally’ brushing your hand against his thigh, ‘accidentally’ going shoulder to shoulder with him, ‘accidentally’ sitting as close as possible so that your thighs would touch. Without fail, Hyunjin would turn slightly red at the contact but never shying away from it nor seeming uncomfortable. Sometimes, you could swear that he even reciprocates the touch, his thigh pressing against yours more firmly, his body slightly leaning towards your hand whenever it brushed against his bicep.

Hyunjin was wonderful to work with, he took instructions well and added his own flair to whatever you wanted from him in a way that elevated your work immensely. Outside from your little mission, you three got along really well, which encouraged you to further pursue getting closer to him.

You were now situated across from him, enjoying your lunch. You didn’t expect your previously innocent conversation to take such a turn when Hyunjin seemed to have found the courage to ask a question he had been dying to ask for quite a while now.

“I gotta ask… I don’t want to misunderstand. Are you… flirting with me?”

Jisung almost chokes on his rice. You stare at Hyunjin.

“I mean! I know you two are in a relationship and everything but… I can’t help but feel like you two are getting… awfully close at times. Not that I mind!” – he hastily tries to explain himself, his neck getting redder by the second again.

“Wow.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’m impressed it took you this long to notice, actually” – you can’t help but tease him a little.

“What? So both of you ARE flirting with me? For real?” – Hyunjin’s eyes were as big as saucers, his mouth hanging open a little. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. The two coworkers that he’d been working with (and found extremely attractive) for weeks did actually flirt with him whenever you met up.

“Yeah. You’re cute. Jisung’s been losing it over you ever since that coffee machine incident a few weeks back” – you admit easily and receive a glare from Jisung beside you.

Hyunjin chuckles out of disbelief and the nervousness creeping up in him.

“The project… It’s not real, is it?”

“Nope” – Jisung answers swiftly, popping the ‘p.’

Hyunjin should be mad that the two of you made him do extra work for free, but for some reason he isn’t.

“Uhm…so what? Is this just a ‘your vibe matches with ours and we want to play around a bit’ or is this something… more serious?” – you could observe him starting to fidget with the ends of his sleeves, nervously biting the skin of his lips and your gaze immediately softened.

This was important. Don’t fuck it up. Don’t make him believe you’re just here to play around with his feelings. That’s no what you’re here to do.

“Listen, I know this is a lot. I mean, two people who are already in a relationship coming up to you like this. This is definitely something serious, not just playing around. We really like you” – you reach across the table with your palm up, giving him the chance to take your hand if he wanted to.

He sheepishly takes your hand into his, his large hand filling yours out with ease, yet as you gazed over to him with a gentle smile on your face, he seemed so small, so unsure of himself.

“If you don’t want any of this and want us to stop flirting with you and would prefer to be friends, that’s fine by us as well. Just be honest with us, I’d hate it if we made you uncomfortable or did something you didn’t want.”

While Jisung is decidedly quiet beside you, he’s nodding along to what you’re saying, softly smiling at him.

Hyunjin grabs your hand tighter and shakes his head slightly, his eyes still big.

“N-no. This is all fine. I’m okay with this”, he swallows around the lump that formed in his throat, “I like you two as well. I thought I was just imagining things, wishing they were really happening. I’m glad that wasn’t the case.”

There are two ways one can react to this.

One, smile at him, telling him you’re glad he’s reciprocating.

And two, clapping your hands and audibly going ‘fuck yes.’

You stare at your boyfriend.

“Really?”

“What? He’s hot.”

Hyunjin giggles at that and you have to begrudgingly remember that Hyunjin seems to be into idiots as much as you are.

You groan and theatrically put your head on the table while Idiot 1 and Idiot 2 are laughing with each other, getting rid of all the tension that was previously building up in your small break room.

You jolt a little when Hyunjin’s hand removes itself from yours and instead starts patting your head in pity.

Maybe this wasn’t going to be that bad.

Your relationship with Hyunjin develops beautifully, he was as romantic as they come, regularly bringing the two of you flowers, writing little encouraging messages when he knew you and Jisung had to attend a particularly exhausting meeting.

It was nice getting to cuddle not only one but two people you loved dearly, waking up in the morning to two pretty faces whose cheeks you wanted to squish.

Another pleasant development was that Jisung and you could test out your theories, which is how Hyunjin found himself kneeling on your bedroom carpet, looking up at you with large eyes, his cock heavy and red between his legs. While Jisung is busy getting something from your dresser, you cup your hands around Hyunjin’s small face.

“Please…” – he whines at your touch, already so beautifully needy even though you haven’t done much yet.

He had been driving you insane at work today, teasing you at every opportunity, ‘accidentally’ letting a touch linger too long on your hip, a kiss a little bit too passionate and lasting a second too long. You knew he was just driving you up the wall on purpose and you guess he got what he wanted but that also meant that you were allowed to torture him a little to get back at him.

“Please what, princess?”- Hyunjin nestles his face against your hand and sighs contently.

“I need you so bad…” – he murmurs against your hand, giving a little kiss to your palm and you suddenly want to hand him the world served on a silver platter.

Seeing as Jisung has finally found the rope hidden in your dresser, you bend down to take Hyunjin’s hands into yours.

“Get up, love” – after helping him find his footing again, you teasingly give his cock one generous pump before tying his hands together with the rope and practically tossing him on your shared bed.

He lets out a whimper as you climb after him, hungry eyes zeroed in on his leaking cock. Your hands ghosts over his tip, barely touching him. Another whine leaves his lips as his hips buck up towards your hand, desperate for any kind of relief.

On the other side of his body, Jisung busies himself with kissing up his chest, leaving a trail of wet kisses up his body.

The new unspoken mission was to fuck Hyunjin silly and find out what shades of red he could turn to.

While you still refuse to give in to Hyunjin’s needs, ghosting your fingers across the length of his dick idly, you watch as Jisung put his fingers underneath his chin to tilt his head up to force him to focus his eyes on him.

“You’re gonna be a good boy, aren’t you?” – he asks him sweetly.

Hyunjin nods frantically in response and lets out a tiny ‘yes’, hoping that this would mean one of you would finally touch him properly.

Jisung smiles down at him before kissing him deeply. You take the opportunity to wrap your hand around his length at the same time and start pumping him agonisingly slow.

You love how squirmy Hyunjin gets when he’s needy, writhing underneath both your touches, not knowing what to do with his body, where to turn next, which touch to chase. You know it kills him that he can’t hold onto Jisung’s shoulder properly or put one of his hands on your thigh with the way his hands are rubbing against the ropes.

You make a mental note to unbind his hands in a bit so his wrists don’t get chafed up too badly.

One of Jisung’s hands finds its way down to his chest, playing with his nipples leisurely as he kisses him, the other lightly wrapping around Hyunjin’s neck, not applying pressure yet. It still forces a delicious moan from his lips.

“You’re being so good” – you say in a low voice, slowly undoing the ropes around his wrists. You pepper a few kisses on the slightly reddened skin up to his fingertips, kissing them delicately one by one.

Jisung whispers something in his ear that makes Hyunjin laugh breathily and while you wonder what’s so funny, it warms your heart to see the two of them so at ease with each other.

You give a light slap to Jisung’s ass to get him to move further up and he yelps loudly.

“That’s for not including me in the joke. Now get your cute butt up there.”

“Boy secret” – Hyunjin cheekily says and giggles again. You playfully roll your eyes at him and as revenge, move down to take the head of his cock into your mouth. The sudden warmth makes his giggles die down into a loud whimper, his face contorting from pleasure.

Jisung, as instructed, crawls up the bed and takes a handful of Hyunjin’s hair into his hand, angling his head towards him.

“You want some too, pretty boy?”

Hyunjin licks his lips in preparation and nods up at him, opening up his mouth obediently before wrapping his plush lips around his length and sucking.

As Hyunjin gets closer to his climax, his hand gently pushes your face away from him, to signal you he’s close while he can’t say it verbally.

You let Hyunjin get further away from his high as you watch him and Jisung fool around fondly, your hand splayed out on his tummy. You feel awfully neglected, the slick between your thighs only an indication of how aroused you were.

Jisung was still blissfully lost in the warmth of his mouth, rutting his hips into him over and over, small gasps and praises leaving his lips that only spurn the older man on. Deciding that Hyunjin had enough time to come down and that it was unfair that they were the only two getting some action, you throw your leg over his hips before sinking down on him, eliciting a long, muffled moan from him.

The vibration of his whimpers are enough to tip Jisung over the edge, some of his cum still making it onto Hyunjin’s tongue as he hastily pulls out and drops to sit beside him, catching his breath.

Seeing as Hyunjin can now focus entirely on you, you grin down at him, bracing yourself against his chest as you deliberately start to move your hips against him, his hands immediately coming up to grab at the flesh of your thighs.

“Focus on me now, angel” – you sigh, chasing your and his high, your hips steadily moving up and down in a rough pace.

Hyunjin throws his head back against the pillows as he lets out a strangled moan, tears already formed in his glossy eyes.

“You’re so pretty, so pretty, just for us, Hyune” – you say between gasps, your climax steadily approaching as you ride him.

“So fucking pretty. You were made for us.”

All your pretty words seem to work wonders on him, his hips meeting yours in shallow thrusts, desperately trying to get the two of you off and snap the tension that had been building.

You don’t know when he moved but Jisung’s warm lips press kisses into your shoulder, his hands now also on your hips, guiding you alongside your other boyfriend.

“I love you, I love you” – Hyunjin chants and the chord between you snaps, the two of you coming undone in eachother’s embrace, your juices mixing as you come.

Once your head clears, you lean down and press your lips to his in a sweet kiss, whispering an ‘I love you too’ against them. You grab Jisung by his shoulder to also press a kiss to his lips before plopping down beside Hyunjin, utterly exhausted.

Your boyfriends take care of the cleanup before racing to get under the covers with you.

“Glad that stupid fake project brought us together.”

“I think I did a pretty good job at it even though it was fake, don’t call it stupid!”

“Not our fault you put so much effort into it.”

“And do what? Half-ass it?”

“Yeah?”

“I wasn’t aware it was fake! Do you think I half-ass all of my work?”

“I don’t know? Maybe?!”

With a grin on your lips, you let out a loud sigh at their bickering, as you settle back against the warmth of their bodies. The bed feels a lot more complete now that Hyunjin was by your side as well. Their scent surrounds you, their voices fill your ears, their warmth warms up your body and a peaceful calmness finds your heart.

Surrounded by enough love to let you drift off to sleep even amongst their yapping.

It doesn’t take long for them to notice you slumbering between them and smiles filled with affection grow on their faces. They decide to leave their squabble for another day with a soft goodnight kiss before they too settle back against the pillows and hope for sleep to find them in the embrace of their lovers.

(extra photos from today's concert because look at them)

[elliesdoll]

idk why i keep thinking abt angsty loser!ellie… she is my baby

nsfw! just ellie masturbating n crying (me) 𝜗𝜚

pts 2 & 3 already posted!

a wonderful anon said my fic reminded them of this song and they r so right… listen to it rn

daily click! do not buy tlou free palestine 🇵🇸

ellie was so in love with you. she is so in love with you.

you are her light. your smile, your laugh, your everything. she just couldn’t get enough of you. being friends with you was probably the best blessing god could ever gift her, yet also the worst punishment.

she knew she could never have you.

not in the way she wanted, anyway.

you talk ellie’s ear off almost everyday, and ellie never gets tired of it. your sweet voice that felt like pure honey and warmth being poured into her ears. so sickly sweet. she swore you were a siren of some sort.

you were so perfect and you didn’t even know it. you would tell ellie about your escapades and little ‘situationships’ as you’d like to call it, and it made her sick. every last person you talked about seemed like shit. she couldn’t believe that you thought that’s all you were worthy of.

she would worship you if you gave her the chance.

she told you the same thing each time: “fuck them. you know you’re too pretty for them anyway.”

and you were always grateful for her. who else would remind you of your worth? you needed her, she was your rock. your fidgety, awkwardly nerdy rock.

she was always the shy type. or she was around you, at least. she was never too bashful, but sometimes she’d slip and show you just how nervous you make her. her freckled skin would turn all pink, her eyes avoiding your gaze. she’d have an awkward, thin-lipped smile, and you could feel the clamminess of her hands if she was touching you. you’d find it cute, how she’d just melt if you two were touching or you’d give her a compliment on literally anything.

but what you didn’t know, is how she hated herself for it.

after anytime you two hung out, she’d go home, stomping to her room and looking down at her feet. “so fucking stupid.” she’d mutter to herself, thinking of all the times she stuttered around you or got all warm in the face. but without fail, each little mishap would lead to her in her bed, a string of curses leaving her mouth while pathetically fingering herself to the thought of you.

one particular night, she had shown up to your house unannounced. knocking at your door, leaning back on her heels as she waited for you to open up.

she doesn’t normally do this. she never does this. but she thought maybe you two had gotten close enough. just enough for her to show up at your home anytime she felt like seeing you.

so when you opened the door, and she saw your hair a bit disheveled, your cheeks flushed and what appeared to be a hickey below your jaw, that thought quickly went away.

“fuck, els. i’m sorry but… really bad timing.”

you said with a light chuckle, giving her an apologetic smile. she just stared at you, eyes wide and her cheeks red.

“fuck. i’m sorry, shit. i don’t know why i showed up here— i wasn’t thinking. sorry.”

she mutters, stuttering over her words. she hated how her tummy got all fuzzy and how her boxers suddenly felt all warm and soaked. all while having the biggest lump in her throat.

before you could say anything back, she was already speed walking away from your front door, down to her car. she got in and drove away, not even bothering to see if you were still there, watching her.

she felt so fucking stupid. her vision was blurry as she drove home, speeding until she finally parked in her driveway. who the fuck was in your house? which one was it fucking you? did they even love you like she did? she wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

she swung the door open, then slammed it behind her as she ran to her room. she closed the door and locked in, and let the tears flow. she kicked her beat up converse off, and aggressively rubbed her cheeks to get rid of the wet tears that rolled down them.

“fucking idiot.”

“why the fuck would i?— god.”

“what did i think? she doesn’t love me.”

she mumbles to herself, all through hiccups and stuttered breaths. her pretty cheeks are wet with hot tears, her eyes red and watery. even her poor nose is all stuffed up, making her sound nasally as she dumbly insults herself.

one by one, she removes her clothes. she fiddles with the button of her jeans and undoes it, hooking her thumbs under the band of her boxers at the same time, and kicks it all off. she then moves to her hoodie, messily taking it off and cursing when it gets stuck on her little bun. she even takes her sports bra off, which she never does.

fully naked and vulnerable, she turns all the lights off and crawls into bed.

she sobs into her pillow, feeling like some pathetic idiot. she doesn’t know why she ever thought you’d feel for her the way she feels for you. she felt so fucking perverted too— getting wet over the idea of you getting fucked. getting wet over your smile, your touch.

she sniffles, her slender hand slithering down to her pussy. she sighs as her middle finger lightly swipes by her clit, feeling just how wet she is. she brings her ring finger into the mix and circles her clit, gathering all the wetness from her clenching hole.

she moans, quietly. ellie isn’t typically a moaner, but she is right now. she is for you. she rubs her clit rapidly, the sounds of her squelching pussy filling her dark room. she closes her eyes, not wanting to cum too quick. she stars to think about you, and her fingers go to plug her hole.

she imagines you below her, giving her that sweet smile as she made love to you. she wanted to love you so bad, it hurt.

“oh god— shit,” she whined to herself, legs spread and feet planted on her bed, knees bent as she mercilessly fucked herself to the thought of you. she wanted to make you cum by her fingers, mouth, cunt— whatever the fuck you wanted.

her imagination switched to your mouth on her pussy, lapping at her clit and eating her out like you’d die if you didn’t. she let out a shaky whine, imagining that her fingers were your tongue, moving in and out of her as your nose nudged her clit.

ellie’s breath sped up, her eyebrows knitted upwards as she felt that hot, sticky feeling in her belly just come flooding out. her cunt pushed out and clenched around her fingers, as she cums with a strangled cry. her body covered in a thin layer of sweat, and her thighs trembling as her slick came gushing out of her, staining her sheets below her.

she slowly pulled her fingers out, catching her breath. she could feel her heart in her ears. but the ache never left. she’s still crying, just not as theatrically. she doesn’t even bother cleaning herself up or her bed, just turning to the side and hugging her pillow. she shoves her face into the plush pillow, her wet face dampening the fabric. and there, cum sticking her thighs and pussy together, naked, she fell asleep.

and she’ll never move on, either. you haunt her, even in her dreams. doomed to love you in every reality.

aaakkk i dunno how to end these 😖 this is my first fic(?) drabble thingy ever so pls be gentle haha lol ☺️☺️☺️👍

this is so rushed bai 😑

[thoughtsforsoob]

Txt as your little brother?

a/n: hello! i do not have any little siblings (let alone any siblings) so this may not be 100% accurate. I do know a lot of people with siblings though and i've had a lot of cousins my whole life :) hopefully this will be enjoyable :D please feel free to request anytime! inbox is always open for requests and ideas!

tags: f!reader

yeonjun

he admires his older sister and want's to be just like her, even well into his teen years

he has his little group of friends that he's had since pre-school and once they all get older, some of them start to hit on his sister and he tf flips out!

"hey! no one talks to my sister! just imagaine it as dating me...the same DNA!"

they all gag and despite the gross image, they do not stop hitting on you until they have all found relationships

he is used to you driving him around but as soon as he gets his license, he takes you everywhere!

he even lies for you when your parents ask where you are.

he'll open the door for you at night and even better, he will go pick you up from whever you went that night.

goes all out on chrismas and birthday gifts because his sister is amazing and deserves the best

soobin

sweetest older brother in the whole world

he is always watching over you to make sure you are okay but he knows when to bud out of something

he is the type of brother that would drive you around and if you insist on driving, he is holding on for dear life to persude you to let him take over the wheel

he always seems to come home with something for you. food, clothes, skin care, candy...

he buys you a lot of your skin care and he always takes you shopping! what a great brother

he is also always down for a late night skin care sesh where you both gossip about drama at school and work and eat a ton of junk food

omg he is type to take care of you when you're sick too

he's your older brother so no matter how old you are or where you are, he is always going to take care of his baby sister.

beomgyu

he is the brother that comes into your rooms, throws something at you, turns off the light and leaves...without closing the door

so so annoying

his main goal in life is to torment you! he does not take this job lightly at all

he is very fun to go places with

when you both were younger, you'd play hide and seek in the store and if you both got caught, you'd both giggle while your mom scolds you.

you two would also hide in the middle of the circular clothing racks and jump out to scare each other and your mom

needless to say, you both are always in trouble but it's okay because you keep each other company when you're grounded

you both were the type to make up songs, games, or performances as kids

you both also get into lots of trouble at school together

as adults, he becomes your partner in crime and you go out everywhere together

taehyun

taehyun is the type of sibling to pretend he does not care about you. like, "oh my sister? idk i don't care what she's doing."

news flash, he does care

he shoes he cares in the most lowkey ways ever

if he knows your mom isn't going to make dinner because she's going out with dad, he will take you out to get food or he will make you whatever you want to eat.

he's also really comforting, which is suprising to those who do not know him much

when your first s/o breaks up with you...all hell breaks loose

he barges into your room with sweets you like he lets you tell him everything...

god forbid you tell him who this person is...he will ask around with your friends until he finds out where they live and he will eggs their house or some shit

he also let's you have full access to his clothes since he knows you like his clothes

he does get annoyed when suddenly all of his t-shirts are missing but he could never stay mad at you

huening kai

being a group of 4 siblings was quite chaotic but you and kai seemed the have a different connect bc .... ya'll were twins

you both grew up wearing matching clothes, practicing the same instrument, and singing.

of course, you and your sisters connected well but you and kai, again, had a little bit of a deeper connection

he comes straight to your room after school and starts to spill all of the gossip about what happened to his friends and him that day

he is the type of brother is also be very caring of not just you, but all three of his beautiful sisters!

buys expensive birthday gifts once he get's his first job and he loves when you three use your gifts

when it comes to dating, he is opposite of yeonjun in the sense that he would rather you date one of his friends

he knows them well and he knows that they are less likely to hurt you

(heheh he loves seeing you and his best friend soobin as a couple. he def gives the "if you hurt her, ill castrate you" talk).

[dseval]

[★INTRO POST★]

Hello, page visitor. If you'd like to, please read this intro post. (And if you don't want to, that's fine, too)

(i promised myself that after posting 10+ posts I will create an intro post idk why. Guys. Is this how tumblr works?)

!! These are always open

Unless stated otherwise. But this does not mean I will do/go along with everything.

Asks/Submissions (you can also ask and submit anonymously)

Art Suggestions

Art Trades (preferably by moots/friends)

☆Accounts

2nd page: @dsevalyappuccino (for shitposts, reblogging, yapping, and lowres doodles)

Twitter acc: @/dsevalxdsx (there is actually nothing here, but it is open for DMs)

AO3: dseval (there is actually only one fic, don't expect anything in the near future)

Bluesky: dseval.bsky.social (not really active, but I post there sometimes, and I accept DMs)

For commissions and inquiries, feel free to message me anywhere or email dsevalxdsx@gmail.com

☆General Info

✧ I am Dseval. (Pronounced dee-s-eval eval like in the word evaluation.) If you feel like it isn't a cute/short enough name for you— then you can call me Eva. Or call me whatever, I'll tell you If I dislike it.

✧ I draw. Occasionally I also code, make games. I also write fanfics (barely), and make music (barely).

✧ I won't reveal my age, but know that I am not a minor.

✧ I'm Queer. I'm okay with all pronouns, but They/Them is my personal favourite.

✧ I am not open for any relationships, in case you plan on asking.

✧ I am okay with dark topics, I love exploring them, but I do prefer wholesome things.

✧ I'm shy. As in, ☆super shy☆. So I may not post often and chicken out of conversations. Please do not be offended If I did that, you did nothing wrong.

✧ I did say I'm shy. But I also over-yap. I like friends. I'm accepting friends anytime anyday. On the topic of over-yap, I apologize If I ever said something that offended anyone. I am not very great at socializing.

✧ I also don't understand tone tags. So i apologise if I'm slow to get things.

✧ NSFW or suggestive is okay. But I don't really make these contents myself.

✧ I am OK with tagging. In fact, tag me in everything.

✧ Most of the time, I act on absolutely no reason and just because. Do not overthink my actions.

✧ My favourite color is PURPLE, in case you can't tell.

☆ Expect:

Expect mostly Undertale Multiverse content, but to be more specific...

Drawings of Sans AUs

Sanshipping

Genderbending Sans AUs

Making my own AU (not speedrun)

Maybe other things, a list cannot list all of my interests

... All in my inconsistent artstyle.

However, feel free to also talk to me about Deltarune, My Little Pony, Evangelion, and Madoka Magica, and several gacha games. I am very deep into the lore of all of the above.

☆Interests

My favourite AU Sans' are Cross and Dust/Murder. (I also think they should kiss)

I am a multishipper, and my bar is very low so I swallow pretty much any content just as long as it is appropriate. Here are my favourites though:

☆ Cross x Dust, Cross x Dream, Color x Killer, Nightmare x Error, Horror x Farm, Geno x Reaper

I absolutely eat those up, so if you know me and you know about these, please tag me in any related content.

☆If...

Do not interact with me If you are any of the following:

You are a proshipper/comshipper/darkshipper (or, whatever name you call yourself). I do not support that behaviour nor do I do condone it.

You are pro-Israel, Queerphobic, body shamers, pedophiles, zoophiles, etc.

You spread hate and harassment.

☆Tags

#archiveverse (for my AU)

#dsevalanswers (for every asks that I answer)

#kebaya skellies (for every drawing of any skeleton in kebaya)

#dsevalreblog (for reblogs interactions something just for me to visit later)

☆PFP hall of fame

In chronological order, from left to right. Only includes previous PFPs.

[jackhues]

i promise - jamie drysdale

request: i love your jamie drysdale fics i just love him he’s one of my favourite players. i was wondering if you could write something where the readers insecure, and he just comforts her

requested by: anon : )

notes: tbh, idk how i feel about this, like i'm sorry it's so short, but it's still kinda cute. hope you like it, thanks for requesting <3

tags: @woodruff-edwards , @austinbutlerscaresme , @zegras2crosby , @l0veforhugh3s , @hockeyboysarehot , @ratkingbunting , @mysticaldonkey , @lam-ila , @babydollmarauders , @starjoyyy , @kjohnson-91 , @gavinbrindley @huggyhugh , @jackhughesily , @panarin10 <3

join my taglist!

gif not mine!

you ran your fingers over the scar.

running down the back of your right leg, it marked where the incision for your tendon repair surgery had been. finally free of the stitches and leg brace, you were now left with a scar that ran down the bottom of your leg.

it was thick and ugly, the skin still a little red considering how new of a wound it was. the doctor told you it would heal over time, but it’d always be a little visible. 

you sighed miserably at the thought of the swimsuit you’d bought a week before the tendon had snapped. you weren’t sure when you’d be able to wear it now. 

you knew it wouldn’t be anytime soon.

with the ugliest scar to exist running down your leg, you didn’t want to torment the rest of the world. seeing people try to hide their laughter would be worse than laughing outright.

you pulled your sweatpants down to cover the scar as footsteps padded down the hall. you lay on the couch, a barely touched book on your lap and the t.v. remote somewhere underneath you.

“morning,” jamie kissed the top of your head, stretching out as he made his way to the kitchen. “you want waffles or pancakes?”

you shrugged, half paying attention, “either’s fine.”

jamie turned on his heel immediately, furrowing his brows at your answer.

“what?” you asked, curling in on yourself. the look he was giving you was doing absolutely nothing to motivate your self-consciousness.

“are you okay?” he asked, looking you up and down, almost as if he could diagnose you by a scan.

“i’m fine,” you told him. “this better not be a way to get out of making breakfast.”

“it’s not,” he put a hand to his heart as if he was actually offended. jamie walked closer, kneeling on the ground in front of you. “it’s just, you always have a very strong opinion on either pancakes or waffles. every single time. the fact that you’re saying either is making me a little concerned.”

“i’m just a bit tired,” you tried to smile. “um… i think i’ll take waffles today.”

you patted jamie’s head, hoping it would be enough to send him away. but of course, jamie was a little too attentive sometimes.

“y/n?” he sat down in front of you, taking your hand in his. “i’m not gonna force you to talk, but i’m not an idiot. i know something’s wrong. if you don’t want to talk, i’m gonna respect that. but you don’t have to shut me out, i’m here for you.”

maybe you were absolutely done with all the shit you’d been through ever since your injury, or maybe it was the way jamie was so gentle with you, but before you knew it, you were sobbing in his arms, crying about how ugly your leg looked.

“and i hate it so much, jamie,” you sobbed, sticking your face in his shoulder. “i hate it.”

“hey, breathe,” he rubbed your back, holding you close. “breathe, y/n.”

you took a shaky breath, wiping your eyes as you pulled away.

“i’m sorry, it’s so stupid,” you muttered, shaking your head. 

“don’t do that,” jamie muttered. “don’t discredit how you’re feeling. you don’t like it, and that’s fine. but it’s not ugly. not to me, i promise.”

“you’re just saying that because you’re my boyfriend,” you muttered miserably.

“y/n, look at me,” jamie said, tilting his fingers under your cheek to get you to look up. he brought your hand near his back where a scar lay. “you’ve always said you’ve loved my scar, even when i’ve always hated it.”

you began to tear up a bit as jamie continued speaking.

“i promise, y/n,” he kissed your hand, “that your scar is nothing to be ashamed of. if i have to spend the rest of my life loving it, showing you how to love it, i will. i promise.”

[heartstopperlarrie]

Idk how much this will help if at all but I’d like to make a @niallermybabe appreciation post. If you see this and you’re one of Bella’s mooties, please feel free to rb and add all the things she’s done for you and how she’s made your life better.

When I first re-joined this app back in November I was convinced nobody would care and I’d abandon the blog after maybe a couple weeks. Then I had @cc-horan28 reach out to me (love you lots my og mootie) and one of the first things she told me to do was to message Bells. I put it off for weeks cause I felt awkward reaching out without really anything to say. When I eventually did message her she IMMEDIATELY welcomed me with so much love and excitement and I instantly felt that she is such a special person. So incredibly inclusive, so supportive, so lovely, just overall a 10/10 human.

One of the first things that come to mind when I think of Bells and how she has made my life infinitely better was the day we lost our German Shepherd Nim. She literally flooded my inbox with asks filled with the most random questions; asking me to come up with nicknames for certain names, playing this or that, just silly things to take my mind off of the loss. She was then messaging me afterwards making sure I’m okay, sending me hugs. Just sweet little Bella things.

I remember a time when she accidentally called me “sis” instead of “sib” (cause I’m enby and whatnot) and her sweet little soul got herself so wound up thinking I was angry with her over it. She was so upset by the thought of hurting me, I honestly thought she couldn’t get any sweeter but she did just with how much she cares about these small things. The way she gets so excited whenever I tell her I’m proud of her is just the most wholesome thing ever. Anytime I’m excited with her about something she gets herself MORE excited and I love it so much. The way she would do anything for me and every single one of her mooties, I have no words to describe how incredible she is.

I work with dogs, and istg every other female dog is named Bella. It used to really annoy me cause it’s just such an overused dog name here. Now every time I hear the name I can’t help but smile because it reminds me of my little Bella Bean.

Every time I message her she’s so excited to hear from me. Every time we interact I get so excited. Every time I see her name pop up I smile.

So Bells, if you see this. Please understand how much light and positivity you have added to my life. Please know that every time I think of you I do it with a smile on my face. I may have only gotten to know you a couple months ago but you made that short time feel like forever. A world without you in it would just be so wrong, and I don’t ever want to experience that. All of these small things that you have done/continue to do for me make my life better. Every single one. You could message me the word “coconut” with absolutely no context and it would make my day. I don’t care what you say, as long as I get to talk to you as much as time zones and responsibilities allow. Because you are worth so much. So so so damn much.

Your value doesn’t decrease based on someone else’s inability to see your worth.

I love you so much sweets. You’re my lil bella bean, yeah? ❤️

[fairycosmos]

do you have any advice on how to overcome internalized homophobia? I’m a bi woman but I have a hard time accepting I’m bi, idk I always felt very strongly about gay rights but didn’t realize until recently I actually really like women and it kind of freaked me out….. the dread that wells up within me is actually kind of terrifying. I have conservative parents who are just casually homophobic but I mean they would never physically harm me or directly confront me about being gay but I think their casual indifference and disdain still left a deep impression on me. I had a girlfriend when I was 16 and my then girlfriend’s mom was really homophobic and to this day it’s painful to think about. Also I guess I always pinged as gay to lots of my classmates because at every school I was enrolled in during high school I always got mocked for being gay/into women. Well. I think I’ve always known I’m bi but not until recently did I realize I actually want to be with women. Do you have any advice how to build yourself up after such instances? How do I extend love to myself and accept myself while still remaining closeted and not having any sort of community in my social life…. I want to move out and live with people my age and make queer friends but I don’t even know where to start. I get so jealous seeing other people happy in relationships with supportive communities and families, which makes me a bad person I know but I just wish I had the guts to actually invest time and energy to build the life I want 😭

i'm going to be very real w you i may not be the very best person to ask. yes, i'm a bi woman whose closeted to my family, so we're on the same page as far as that goes, but i think based on this ask thar you're in a bit more of an extreme situation than me. my parents would describe themselves as liberal as far as economic status goes but they've definitely got an implicit bias towards the lgbt community and it has showed ever since i was a kid......i honestly do not know what they would do if they knew i was bisexual, idek if i would have a relationship with them at all. so I find it hard to offer any concrete advice on building yourself up after coming out bc, obviously, i haven't even gotten there myself - i'm out to some friends and stuff but not to family. i think more than anything we're in the same boat, i daydream about moving out and meeting queer friends too, it is a really really difficult position to be in. i wanna say the only thing i've done in the last 2 yrs go sort of expand my horizons is go to gay bars - though i have to get the train for 40 min to get to to one - and try and get in contact with any sort of lgbt support or community, even online.

something i want to impress is that you don't have to talk about your sexuality to anyone unless you're comfortable doing so. for the longest time i felt like i was betraying everyone by not immediately announcing it - being bi - but i've come to learn that is truly just. my business?? and not even a big deal to most ppl??? i often feel so perverted, so wrong, so just like. ashamed of experiencing same-sex attraction, but genuinely - we don't owe that information to anyone unless we decide for ourselves that it's relevant to that particular dynamic. it's really really hard for me to accept, and i still find it hard to even say "i'm bi" out loud. but i think i just want you to know w this message that i at least somewhat get it and that you're not doing anything wrong by just like. being who you are and doing what you can to get by authentically. sending a massive hug your way - if you want to talk about this more, feel free to message me anytime!! x

[varietales]

Talk about your favorite ship! | Favorite character to rp?

mun meme // accepting

This turned into a massive ramble oops...

Favourite ship (i'm letting myself do 3 RP ones from across my blogs)!

Lisanna x Sting with @aitheros. It lives in my head and heart rent free, I’m so soft for them. We have had so many good and precious interactions with them and plotted much more too! They are such a lovely pair and bring out the best in each other, I adore their softness and the way they can relax around each other so beautifully and understand each other. They’ve both been through a lot, and the plot we’ve done for them has added to that and I’m forever excited about the things we can do within the plot and outside of it too. They’re also AU gold honestly. And I can’t even think about Lisanna without Sting coming to mind now. I can’t express how much I adore them, and Mandy is an incredible writer (im forever in awe of the description and imagery and use of metaphors, absolutely stunning every time, not to mention the dialogue and everything else too) so I’m always feeling super lucky to get to write with her! Her Sting is just CHEFS KISS (its also his bday today and I remember this bc I love him so much, he is the sunshine in my life). So yes 10/10 I adore them.

Rogue x Mary with @killrate. We started writing these babes together way back in like 2016, so it has been A Long Journey and it’s been so good. Beautiful example of awkward friends to secret lovers. With Mary being an ex-cultist and criminal and all, and Rogue being a famous mage, we get this Delicious plot of them keeping their relationship secret. The Yearning and Drama and all that goodness. And we also have an angsty breakup era planned which is gonna kill me but I also love it. In their happy era, they are so beautiful, so cute and adoring and flirty and fun but deep too and the feelings are so real and get me every time. He just adores her so much and is the absolute softness for her. I’m weak, send help. Plus as well as being one of the coolest people ever, Fae has such wonderful writing, its always so fun, so well done and full of personality, and a delight to read!!!

Gray x Evergreen with @lucentaire. At first glance, one might think Huh that’s a weird pair, but the more you think about it, the more it makes sense. They have a lot in common in terms of hobbies/interests, the way they think and even act sometimes, and a lot more. I love these two (and Jana’s specific portrayal) for the way they have this beautiful…idk exactly, like understanding or acceptance of each other, that’s growing with each interaction. They’re really starting to Get each other and it brings a certain peace and its lovely. I love seeing them begin to open up to each other, and I love the hints of feelings creeping in, and I love the teasing that happens from time to time between them as well as from their friends, its just all So Good. When I think about them, I just get this really warm sense of peace and I love it. I also have to say Jana is an amazing writer, her words always flow so well, and she has this gift of sneaking in little references to other characters/muses or little anecdotes from a muse’s past or family that just really Add a little something and make her muses feel so real and rounded. An absolute inspiration every time. And anytime i'm writing anything about Evergreen in general, I have to actively stop myself from writing 'Rena' instead, she's just so deep in my brain.

Favourite character to RP!

I have so many muses and have written so many more in the past, so it’s tricky to pin down a favourite! They all have their differences, and my fave can change based on mood as well. That being said, the first one that came to mind was Lisia (Pokemon)! She was my most active (basically Only) muse for about 8 or 9 months (which is sadly impressive for me) back in 2018. I’m not sure if its nostalgia that I’m holding onto, but I had a lot of fun with her. The RPC was fun and active and I had some really cool things going (and then things went Bad). I put in a Lot of work with Lisia, writing heeeaps of hcs and so she’s a muse that I really adore. She’s just a gorgeous gal with a gorgeous heart. I haven’t been able to get her going again since then but I’ve been thinking about her lately and might give her blog a clean up. I say that every so often tho and never do it, plus I can never manage to get her active again. But anyway, outside of her, I think I would say Lisanna is one of my faves to write! Coincidentally (or not), Lisanna and Lisia are very similar personalities. I enjoy their bubbly, cute personalities, and the way they can become teasing menaces when they want to be, particularly when they get close to someone. They also have this great potential for depth and deep and meaningful convos and angst. They’ve been through a lot and are still So Kind and I think I just find that sort of character comforting. On the complete other hand, I also really get a kick out of writing Macbeth, and my other old fave that’s just come to mind is an og muse of mine, Siegrain, which again, was once upon a time a Most Active muse of mine that I somehow can never get going again. But I did love that sassy blue haired bastard...

I suppose I could have said which muse on This blog is a fave to rp, but i haven't really gotten things going for each muse yet so we'll have to wait and see!

[ta-ni-ya]

I’m sorry that I constantly want to talk to you

I’m sorry that when you take to long to reply I get sad

I’m sorry that I might say things that pi$$ you off

I’m sorry that I might come off as annoying

I’m sorry if you don’t wanna talk to me as much as I wanna talk to you

I’m sorry if I think about you too much and too often.

I’m sorry if I tell you about pointless drama when you don’t really care

I’m sorry if I come off as clingy but it’s just that…

You’re one of the only people I can talk to about my interests, one of the only people that don’t call me weird for liking anime as you like it too, one of the only people who don’t look at my drawings and go ‘that’s bad, what the hell did you draw’ or ‘why the hell did you draw that’.

AHHEOOOEOWOQOQ I WILL FKING CRYYYYY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Ok I will say it with the flow-

I don't mind nor do I stop anyone- literally anyone from talking to me! Ahhhhh you can talk to me anytime you want!

There are so many sorrys I can't- please never apologize for what you're feeling and I'm so glad that you opened up to me I did not know I was making you feel that way- as I said I was busy for a whole day that's why my replies were late I'm sorry babeee 😭🤧

You're definitely not pi$$ing me off bae- you're making me cry when I read this ahhhhrkjakqejebeb

You're not annoying 😭😭 I was honestly happy that you tagged me in your oc art challenge thing

Oh shut up I definitely want to talk to you wdym 🥰 feel free to message me whenever you want ;)

Girl- I love drama 👀 and let me tell you- I'm clingy af irl so what you're saying is really just something I love 😤

Yk I so glad you actually said this- I would've never known 😭 pleaseeeee feel free to randomly talk to me anytime! I will always try my best to reply asap and this goes to all my other moots too 🤧 and tbh- who ever thinks liking anime is weird- they're weird themselves and idc about them cuz it's ok to like something and if the other person doesn't agree they should just stay quiet if they dont got anything better to say. And like I said, every artist has its own way and being myself an artist I know how it goes from start lol- I was terrible at it but that doesn't mean I can criticize others without them asking for it- i can simply just give tips right? Honestly your art is amazing I dont ever wanna say bad about any art unless the artist asks for some mistakes in it- though I'm not professional or something too but atleast I can help with what I know right?

All I want to say is thank you! And please don't say sorry too much idk how to handle that 💀 I feel bad ok-

[merlucide]

You know me but it’s embarrassing to say it so I’m gonna put it as anon

I gen hate myself so much, my looks, body , personality and everything, I feel like crying I can’t even look at myself anymore and I just have such bad anger and sadness I fake my whole personality and I can’t do this anymore.

I feel like my family and friends hate me, I say rude stuff without realising and I upset people and I just hate myself so much, I had to let this out

hey, I totally understand how you feel, and I’m sorry

I want you to know that I’m here for you, and I care about you.

Hating yourself sucks, it really does. Not feeling pretty no matter what you wear is one of the worst feelings. You are beautiful whether you believe that or not. I can guarantee that nobody looks at you and thinks “wow she’s so ugly”. Loving yourself is so hard, especially when you wish you looked so much different.

I also know what you mean with feeling like everyone hates you, but I swear it’s never as bad as you think it is. saying shitty things and make people upset, it’s not fun.

I want you to know that I love you so much, and I think you are a great person. You can think terrible things about yourself but they aren’t true, the feelings are true, just not the thought.

I’m so sorry you feel this way, but just know you aren’t alone. If you ever need to talk, I’m always here, feel free to dm me anytime. everything is going to be okay, you are okay, it’s all okay

one thing that helped me learn to love myself, is looking at people that had features I had, like tummy pudge or whatever. I’d think “I don’t think she’s ugly because she has a tummy, so why do I’d think im ugly?”. Idk, that just helped me. No human is perfect, we all have flaws. I also taped postcards on mirror with stuff like “you are beautiful” that helped me too (Not trying to tell you what to do, it just helped me)

I hope you feel better, I’ll always be here for you

[destinyc1020]

For Confession Corner Sunday

I, for one, feel it's disrespectful to discuss TZ's sex life. What they do in public or what is shared on a public forum is fair game for discussion, but their private intimate moments are off limits imo. Other than simple public affectionate gestures and the pap pics of passionate kisses in their vehicle, we are not privy to their intimate life. And rightfully so. Knowing how TZ felt about those pap pics, and knowing they keep their relationship sacred, I feel extremely uncomfortable discussing and/or speculating about their more intimate moments.

Unpopular opinion?

*Taking a deep breath so that I can fully prepare myself to answer this ask without ruffling any feathers*

First of all, thank you so much Anon for your confession. 🙂 As you know, today is a judgment-free zone when you send things in for confession corner lol. I actually appreciate you bringing this topic up, because I don't think this really gets talked about enough in the Tomdaya fandom tbh. 👀

Before I dive in, I'll just put out a ***disclaimer*** and say that my opinions and feelings on this topic are just MY personal feelings, so you all don't have to agree. 🤷🏾‍♀️

With that said, I'll just say that I actually agree with you 100% on this. 👏🏾 I think maybe in years past I didn't really see the "big deal" about speculating about, or openly discussing assumptions about Tom and Z's sex life (just harmless fun, right?), but as time went on, I started noticing that SOME fans in the fandom seemed to have a bit of a fixation about what Tom and Z's sex like must be like in the bedroom (even being graphic about it 🥴), and I just started to get a bit creeped out by that... no offense. 🥴😬👀

I agree that there's definitely a very fine line btwn fans finding a couple adorable and cute 🥰, vs fans conjuring up multiple wattpad-level fanfics about Tom and Zendaya's bedroom behavior, and no offense, but to me, the latter is just kind weird. 😵‍💫

I don't really like speculating about ANY celebrity's sex life (obviously, we KNOW they ALL have sex 😅) in great detail like that. Even small jokes can be a bit weird. It's like, you don't know them!

Plus, I find ppl to be a little WEIRD just in general when it comes to Tom and Z and sex just period. From the fans/trolls who think Z is "cheating" on Tom anytime she interacts in a romantic scene with any of her male co-stars🙄, to male fans making weird, sexually-explicit gay manips of Tom in his Spider-man/Peter Parker character (or just Tom himself).... idk... it's just really gross and weird to me, I'm sorry. 😞 They've been doing this stuff for years! Even when Tom was like 21. 🥴

Believe me, after 6 years in this fandom, I've definitely seen some things lol. 😵‍💫

I can't police what other ppl discuss or choose to post on THEIR blogs (nor would I ever want to 🥴), but I just know that for me on my blog, I usually try to be relatively respectful of TZ and their rlshp, and I think we pretty much keep it fairly PG-13 in here when it comes to stuff like that lol. They seem like such a sweet couple 🥰 that just wants to be private, and so I usually try not to go down the rabbit hole of their "intimate" life, or make any assumptions, cuz the truth of the matter is, we just don't know a SINGLE THING! 🤷🏾‍♀️

All we can say is that they seem extremely happy, and just leave it at that lol 😅

But anything beyond that is just speculation, and I guarantee you, their real life intimate details are probably not even as "exciting" as fans make it out to be anyway rofl 🤣 That's the problem with fanfics lol... They put out this idea about a person that might not even be true! 👀

Idk, maybe it's just me, but I agree with you.... speculating about anyone's (celebrity or NOT) intimate sex life is just kinda gross to me, and is kind of crossing a very fine line imo. 👀😬

I just love TZ together, and I think that over the years (especially after they got outed) I've just gained so much more RESPECT for them, and I just feel kind of protective over them in a way, ykwim? ❤️

Idk... Maybe you and I are the ONLY ones who feel this way lol 😆, but I'm actually glad you brought this topic up! Because I have secretly felt for a long time that there are some in the fandom who may go a bit too far in their sexualization of TZ, and it just starts to become a little ick. 🥴

[the-heartlines]

20 questions for fic writers

thanks for tagging me @madsmilfelsen! ♥️

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 82...83..including the one i have on anon shhh ;)

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 208, 351 words which is crazyyy

3. What fandoms do you write for? house of the dragon primarily because i'm OBSESSED. (thank you rhaegon) i have a eversnow oneshot from the hunger games, a snow/reader one from abosbas, a uncle/niece reylo one from star wars, a darklina daddaughter one from shadow and bone, a demon/witch haladriel one from the rings of power, a hellcheer one from stranger things, a momson soulbates one from bates motel.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? 

5. Do you respond to comments? 90% of the time, within a few days, unless someone is just like "update now!" or something not even saying they liked the fic lol. and honestly sometimes i read the comment and forget to reply lolol.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? ...oh god my very dead dove helaena/blood & cheese fic titled anything..."daemon targaryen sends his regards." indeed he did...

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? my modern rhaegon fic: one love, two mouths...i wrote that fic during a super difficult time in my life last summer and oof anytime i went back to that fic and wrote it for the weeks i did i poured everything angsty and all my feels into it and it turned out so so fucking good!

8. Do you get hate on fics? yes lmaooo...and sometimes i just get plain dumb comments that make no sense ??? like why'd you even continue reading??? i will never understand that!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? stealing mads answer of "hell yeah, fuck yeah" because HELL TO THE YES. i feel like i write super explicit, visceral smut with FEELING, whether that be possessiveness, anger, jealousy, love, LUST. it's all very encompassing and passionate...

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

if my helaemond twins inspired by reylo force bond counts this YES i have!

i need to expand upon that and write something longer!

11. free space / no question here, send me an ask with one instead please :)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? YES one love, two mouths was

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? not yet...but one day...a beloved bestie and i want to and have talked about it before! ;)

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? my fave ships are a tie between rhaegon and helaemond and they are my fave fave fave to write! especially when they're fucking each other lol

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? i will not tolerate this kind of negativity LOL but rn i feel like i won't ever finish my heldaemond sequel to peaked with crimson or my rhaegon oneshot inspired by the rape me scene in succession

16. What are your writing strengths? incest smut lol no but i think i add a power punch of emotions to even the most smuttiest fics. also my symbolisms & alliterations are awesome ;)

17. What are your writing weaknesses? i think some of my fics can seem similar but idk it's hard when it's INCEST and a brother wants to breed his sister =/ also i'll go back and read a fic of mine after a time and see quite a few grammatical errors or something DUMB...sooo...

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i used high valyrian in one fic and meh...i honestly forget about it ngl

19. First fandom you wrote for? house of the dragon

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? my rhaegon fics: poisonous veins & suffocator are tied for my top two favorite fics. also dragon sear; seared by sunlight is my most poetic and fave helaemond fic i've written

tagging: @unusual-raccoon @barbiedragon @humanpurposes

@stxrks @arcielee

[canayams-art]

it's meee, the qianqing anon✨ it certainly been a while since ive been in your asks jsjdjdjd the uni has been crazy and the finals were approaching so i had to force my focus on studying instead of screaming about my faves to anyone who was willing to listen :") but now that that's out of the way for a while now because the second semester has already started, im free to go back to my deranged brainrots sjejejejjeke

OH I ALMOST FORGOT very very late merry christmas (if you celebrated) and happy new years!! 🎉🎉

im rewatching the second season of tgcf at the moment and im going crazy over the small lqq moments i missed in my first watch wjejejek he's just such an amazing character and soo 😍 i love/hate that im now restarting the angst 😭😭

SOMEHOW I ALSO MISSED THE BRIEF BLURRY SHI WUDU CAMEO AND I WAS SCREAMING ABOUT IT FOR HALF AN HOUR TO MY FRIEND!! I CANT WAIT TO SEE HIM IN HIS FULL CORRUPTED GLORY IF WE EVER GET GHE BLACK WATER ARC ANIMATED!! he actually might be in my top three favorite characters from tgcf even if i don't talk about him nearly as much as i talk about mq

anyways. LQQ!! i know i already watched everything and i know that i know what's going to happen but man i am not prepared to go through that again! while i am EXTREMELY glad that we got to see him boil qr alive AND slice him in half, THE PAIN THE ANGUISH THE CONFLICT JWJWIEKEKKEJJE

i don't think i will be getting him out of my head anytime soon :")) im even more salty that he doesn't get a more important scenes later in the series :((

unfortunately ive been a bit brain-dead because of the most boring subjects in the world ughhh so i don't have any new lqq and mq thoughts :(( if you do pls share with me, im dying for every crumb of creativity available skkekekeke

also idk if i mentioned this in my last ask, but it makes me so happy that both you and your followers like these little lqq/mq rants 🥹 it makes me excited to share whatever new idea pops into my brain and know that there are somewhere ppl who get just as excited about them as i do

anyways, i hope you're doing well!! 😽😽

Welcome back qianqing anon!!!

I hope finals went well for you and that you’ve been able to catch your breath again. I also hope you enjoyed the holiday season!

Every time I see or think about donghua lqq I feel so grateful to the production team for depicting the way lqq feels and expresses himself so intensely. I know we all know this by now but his arc really is my favorite within the entire story,,, 🥹 It’s a shame we really only see him in the early chapters and the final ones— I genuinely think his story could easily be its own novel/extra.

Also where does shi wudu show up???! If it’s later in s2 then I haven’t spotted him yet cos I,,,,, still haven’t gotten around to finishing s2 (life got in the way of quality time in lqq land 😭). I feel you though— I find shi wudu interesting in such a way where I love his character but I also feel he 100% got what was coming to him LMAO. Blackwater arc is gonna be so wild to see.

But!! Back to qianqing lol. I was thinking earlier about the fact that lqq answers any personal communication array regardless of who is contacting him. Meanwhile mq haunts the public communication array but gives this vibe that not a lot of people have access to his personal array,,,, made me think about how mq seems like the type who always reaches out to lqq privately, knowing that lqq will always answer, but refuses to give his password in return. Lqq probably asked him once and mq probably told him something like “It’s pointless when I know you’ll answer me no matter what.” (Bonus: maybe mq finally decides to hand his password over when lqq ends up going down to the mortal realm to seek his revenge— like it’s mq’s way of telling lqq that he’s concerned but without flat out saying he’s concerned for lqq LOL)

Anyway! Please always feel free to slide into the inbox. I may be slow to reply to these but they really do make my day. The qianqing brainrot never sleeps 😂

[mystic-myrtille]

I need a moment to talk.

I have been actively avoiding season 5 because the LS invokes negative emotions in me...But I recently saw that Mari////Chat kiss.

Yeah....Objectively it's the best kiss for the LS...It was consensual and there was no shot of Marinette's butt.

But it's kind of like when I watched Smallville and there was the Clark and Lana and Clark and Lois romances...I could never get into the Clark and Lana relationship, I don't hate it as much as the LS (but they are still kind of the Adrie///nette of the show)

As much as I think Clark and Lana have moving scenes I always forgot that because Clark and Lois are unmatched.

Still annoying I disowned some Lukanette mutuals I had because they also ship Mari///Chat.

Sorry...MC has nothing on Lukanette and I can't get on board when Marinette forced herself to fall for Chat Noir even if she had every reason to reject him.

And yet people get pissed at me when I say the LS is forced.

And the Mari////Chat in season 5 is just fanservice to keep the fans around...Because A*truc realized how popular MC after saying MC would never be romantic in nature.

I guess on the bright side even more people nowadays are pointing out how bad the LS is...How forced it is and how it does not feel genuine.

Well yeah, it's just fanservice and people are taking it. Like a dog to a doggie treat.

Of course, I'm cool with people venting to me about what frustrates them about the show. Feel free to share your thoughts anytime:)

Understandable, I thought the Mari//caht kiss was sweet, but I just didn't feel anything because it felt undeserved. Like, the Chat blanc trauma. Marinette should 100% not want to pursue Chat noir after experiencing the Chat blanc time line. Mayyyybe if Marinette had more time to really analyse her feelings and work through her chat blanc trauma and... idk have Chat be a really great and reliable partner or whatever over more episodes, it might've been believable. But like this, it's clear it was nothing but fanservice and instead of actually exploring the dynamic these two might have, they use it for some fanfic type fluff/hurt/comfort and then kill it. Great, what am I supposed to take from this? That literally went nowhere.

And it's just so wild to me, because they had 4 seasons to develop the relationship that had 4 different dynamics, and they barely did anything with that and now they have to speed run everything by killing off all sides but one, giving Marinette a hard time because no way things can ever be easy for her and call it a day. Groundbreaking.

[cgetbrmj]

OK SO IK I COMMENTED BEFORE. BUT I WILL DO IT AGAIN.

About the starry eyed fic, I LOVE how you portrayed snow. He’s *not* a good person, much less a good caregiver. And GOD the way you had him go like “you want to be good for me right?” And “I thought you were trying to be good.” ITS VERY MANIPULATIVE AND I LOVE IT. I FELT SO BAD FOR SEJANUS BECAUSE SNOW WAS LIKE…idk he was a bit of an asshole and I love how you didn’t really justify anything he was doing, it made it SO much more accurate and interesting <3

and yes, I have officially read the book, it broke me. Planning on watching the movie soon with my family :)

anyway hope this ramble didn’t bother u too much!!

AHH TUMBLR MUTUAL SAGE HELLO!!! First off, never ever feel bad about rambling with me - it's genuinely my favourite thing ever, I basically screamed with excitement when I saw this! <3

UGHHH I LOVE when people get exactly what I'm writing and we can both just talk meaning and characters and god it's such a good feeling haha. Snow is Sooooooo manipulative in everything he does and there is pretty much nothing he does without an ulterior motive (FOR HIMSELF) so so glad that translated well and you liked it too - Sejanus (both Little, in the context of the fic, and just in general) is so blinded by his trust and faith in Coryo and it's so heartbreaking for him to be so consistently let down by him and yet never straying from him. And of course, Little Sejanus is far too blinded by the idea of Coryo 'taking care' of him, being physically close and affectionate, and keeping him 'away' from danger that he doesn't think twice about what Coryo is actually saying. I could talk about them for hours, seriously.

WOO!! So cool that you finished the book! It absolutely destroyed me as well!! I'm actually going to rewatch the movie tonight and I am SO excited - I think there's some definite differences that feel kinda important, to me at least - but altogether I really loved the movie (and the casting was so good) Once you've got a proper voice to fit each character it's amazing - I simply couldn't help writing fic on them immediately lol. Enjoy the show ;) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Super hypocritical of me to even say this, but I don't know how long of a response you were expecting from this so - also sorry for being a MAJOR rambler hahaha - PLEASE feel free to ramble to me anytime though, as I said I love it so much - whether it's fic related or not <3

Thankyou so so so much for such a sweet message!!! Made my week for sure! Sending lots of love! <3