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clairecrive · 4 years ago

Note

can u make a nikolai x reader based on the song mr perfectly fine by taylor swift?

Mr Perfectly fine

A/n: Ahh, thank to you friend, I've been jamming to this song every day lmao Hope I've done it justice x Also, I've left out some parts of the lyrics to make it better fit the story.

(if you want, you can add yourself to my taglist here)

for my other masterlists, you can find them on my navigation page

Word count: more than 7K (ikik it took a life of his own, what can I say)

Warnings: bit of fluff, angst (like a lot), character's death, spoiler if you haven't read Siege and Storm

Tagging: @jupiterandbutterflies (Thank you so much for your comment! I saw it and it made my day✨)

(I don't remember where I took this from so if you know pls lmk)

Most people knew of Nikolai Lanstov. He was a prince, the second born and the most charming. Most people knew him thanks to the countless rumours that went around at court: supposedly he was not of royal blood. "Sobachka" was what they called him.

No matter how though, everyone knew of the last Lanstov prince. But very little knew him.

Meeting him wasn't difficult. Since he had been of age, Nikolai had always been out of the Grand Palace and among people. He’d also volunteered to enlist in the first army, refusing any kind of special treatment and fought beside his brothers in arms in the infantry. That was part of the reason why everyone outside the court loved him so much.

Being Grisha meant that fighting in the Second Army was mandatory. Not that you minded. There was nothing you wanted more for your people than to finally be free. Also, that Shadow Fold needed to go and as the Darkling has always said, all efforts are necessary.

That’s how you met Nikolai the first time. Generally, the First and the Second Army were stationed in different parts of the campsite. Numerous quarrels between oprichniki and Grisha had rendered the separation necessary. However, you never liked crowds much and living in the Little Palace meant that you were always surrounded by people. So, every chance you had to draw away and be by yourself for a while, you took it. Also, being a Healer meant that you’d spent more time in your assigned tent taking care of soldiers than among them.

Word had gone around that everyone in need could come to you. Usually, you had been instructed by the Darkling that your powers were reserved for Grisha. However, what good was it to have the ability to cure people and only take care of a selected few that very rarely got seriously injured? Meanwhile, soldiers of the First Army often suffered from severe injuries, fatal gunshots or knife wounds. You could help them and possibly save their lives so why shouldn’t you?

That was why Nikolai found you one night. Sure at that point it was just another nameless soldier to you. He had never been in your tent before so you had never seen his face before. The boy whose arm he had draped on his shoulders though, was a usual visitor of yours.

“Oh, Petyr, what happened this time?” gesturing to his blond friend to lay him down on the table, you started gathering everything you needed. Not that you needed much but you had found out that Petyr was absolutely incapable of bearing having his bones or injuries in general repaired without having some kind of pain reliever before.

After a few tries, you came up with a herbal composition that dulled the pain but didn’t make him unconscious. Using kvas would mean that Petyr would be knocked out for a couple of hours. That would put him in trouble with his superiors.

“He’s a fool, that’s what happened.” The explanation came from his friend after he put him down gently. Despite his words, you could hear in his tone worry and guilt?

“If saving your life makes me a fool then go ahead and call me one,” Petyr huffed in pain.

“Who knew you were so brave, uh?” After quickly shredding the herbs you needed, you poured hot water on it and brought the cup to Petyr’s lips while helping him keep his head up.

“He’s the bravest of us all,”

“If I knew it took a bullet wound to make you hand out compliments so easily, I would have done it sooner.” Scoffed Petyr after sending you a thankful look.

“See? What did I tell you? A fool,” his friend said dramatically and you smiled amused at their playful banter.

“Let’s see what we’re dealing with, shall we?” You said out loud to warn both Petyr and his friend. Letting them know what was about to happen was best, your experience taught you. Both for the person on the table that could brace themselves for what was about to happen and for the person with him that was filled with worry and cautiousness. Oprichniki didn’t trust Grisha that much.

After assessing the damage, you let out a relieved sigh as the bullet had gotten through and it had not hit any major artery. It had already got infected though, so you knew it would be a painful one to treat.

“So, did you receive any letters lately, Pety?” You ask, suggestively wiggling your eyebrows while your hands cover the wound. You had your eyes closed to better focus but you were sure that he had rolled his eyes.

“Only from my mum.”

“Don’t tell me you didn’t write her back,” you said, opening your eye just in time to send him a glare.

“Ugh, not this again, y/n, please. Have mercy on me, I’m bleeding all over the table.” Petyr moaned making his friend snicker.

“You’re not bleeding all over the table and if you didn’t notice, I’m already taking care of you, am I not? That doesn’t excuse you for being an idiot, though.”

“Are you two in cahoots or something? It’s not fair. Wounded man over here.”

“Oh shut up.” Both you and his blond friend said at the same time. Petyr moaned once again and you sent a little amused smile to the blondie.

“Should I leave you with a cool battle scar? Maybe acting like a war hero will give you the balls to write to her.” You harmlessly threatened him but your hands were already reconnecting the tissue of his skin without letting it scar.

“I’ve told you, y/n. She deserves better than what I can give her. I am, who knows if I even make it home? I’d be only stringing her along.” Now Petyr was dead serious. It was true, you had talked about this often since he was a regular you got to know him better and he had soon told you about his sweet Katia.

While his friend chanted “fool” like a mantra in the background, you took his bloodied hand in yours, his wound fully healed.

“Petyr, how do you think she’s gonna react when she learns that there hasn’t been any delay to her letters but you’re just ignoring her? Besides, you should let her make this decision too. Who knows, she’ll surprise you.” Squeezing his hand you turned to let your words settle and to put away your utensils. You knew you had given him so much food for thought so you didn’t address the subject anymore. His friend helped him off the table and that’s when you noticed that he was injured too. He had a pretty nasty cut on his lower lip and there was already a bruise forming on his temple.

“Petyr, you can sit on my chair while I take care of your friend. You should be fine but for at least a while don’t stress your body.”

Mentally making a list of the things you need to tend to this kind of wound and where you kept them, you started collecting before heading back to them.

Petyr had sat down but his friend was still standing.

“You don’t have to lie down if you don’t want to, but unless you don’t want me to go take a ladder or something, it would be best if you sat on the table.” You gave him your best reassuring smile as you mixed the healing paste. Sometimes, men didn’t like to put themselves in a vulnerable position with someone they didn’t know and had learned to fear. He wasn’t that badly hurt and it would only take a couple of seconds to fix but not every oprichniki was comfortable with being healed by Grisha power. So the paste would do your job for you. It would take longer, sure and it would also sting a lot more but at least he’d be healed at last.

After looking at you for a little while, the blond man did as you instructed, giving you a dazzling smile in return when you settled between his legs to fix his cut.

“The name is Nikolai or handsome if you prefer.” It was not the first time a wounded soldier tried to flirt with you. IT didn’t bother you, you found them amusing more than anything and you knew it was the allure of someone taking care of them speaking more than any real interest.

“Let’s hope you won’t be around here much for me to learn your name.”

“I’ll have to find another way to make myself unforgettable then.” He winked at you before hopping off the table.

You didn’t address his words, only gave them the paste you had prepared. It would prevent any wound from being infected and would be able to cure small cuts and bruises if applied for a couple of days. With that, you sent them both on their way. Petyr waving you goodbye while Nikolai sent you another wink.

And so this was how it all started.

Mr. "Perfect face"

Mr. "Here to stay"

Mr. "Looked me in the eye and told me you would never go away"

Everything was right

Despite your fellow Grisha, military life could be a bit alienating. Which sounded like a paradox, sure, but everyone had their own way of processing trauma and emotions and of course there were plenty of those during the war. If the best way to come to terms with everything that happened was to distance yourself from others and try to find the solution in solitude, it could get to the point where you’d feel alone in a room full of people.

To get a little respite, you’d usually go on a long walk or resort to stargaze. Sometimes, depending on where you were posted, it wasn’t safe to leave the campsite. So, that’s how Nikolai found you one night. Even he had to take a breather once in a while. Being a different version of yourself based on who you’re interlocutor was must be exhausting. Of course, you didn’t know this. You knew nothing about Nikolai at that point if not that he was Petyr’s friend and a socialite, according to other soldiers.

He seemed to be at the centre of gossip no matter what group of people you found yourself with and there also seemed to be a consensus about him. Everyone liked him. Even if it was rare for some Grisha to appreciate oprichniki, you knew they somewhat respected him because if they didn’t praise him out loud, they didn’t speak ill of him either.

“Not a fan of crowds, are you?” he announced his presence before sitting down beside you.

“I love them, I really do. It’s just that sometimes it gets too much.”

“Yeah, I know how you feel.”

“You do? Everyone seems to think you’re a socialite.”

“It’s what I want them to think but alas, I enjoy being more complex and multifaceted than that.” He lightly bumped your shoulder with his, eyes aflame with mischief.

“I bet.” you simply smirked. Despite how everyone seemed to think they knew him, you got the peculiar vibe from him, like there was a lot more to him than what he let everyone see.

“No one seems to know much about you.”

“Maybe you’ve talked to the wrong people.”

“Well, then I guess it’s better if I got straight to the source, don’t you think?”

“That will surely be a better start. Not sure you’ll find what you’re looking for though.”

“We’ll see.”

That night had been the first of many. It had become a sort of an unspoken arrangement between the two of you. While it didn’t last long, you sensed that you got to know him better than everyone. There was something about late nights meetings under the stars that prompted deep and meaningful conversations. It wasn’t hard to form a solid bond with him after a few nights.

The conversations weren’t always personal in the conventional sense. You’d often stray and talk about the most bizarre things. Like why something had the name it had or how cool it’d be if it was possible to pass through surfaces, which led to imagine all the uncomfortable situations one could find themselves in if they were to simply go into a room through its wall.

Nikolai was witty, overly confident and ambitious and he knew a lot of things. You always wondered how he had learned them since he was so young and been in the army for a couple of years already. But Nikolai was never too forward on certain topics, his family and childhood being some of those. You understood, those were sore subjects for you too. So you never insisted. It was much more interesting to listen to him rumble about impossible future projects of his, like a flying ship.

"When people say impossible, they usually mean improbable." He’d say whenever you’d point it out to him. Somehow, despite the absolute absurdity of them, the sheer confidence that he seemed to constantly exude, made you consider the possibility of his success.

You got the distinct feeling that there was nothing this man couldn’t do.

But that was when I got to know Mr. "Change of heart"

Mr. "Leaves me all alone," I fall apart

It takes everything in me just to get up each day

But it's wonderful to see that you're okay

But, alas, as all things do, these encounters of yours also got to an end. You knew it would happen, you were both soldiers so your lives were both heavily characterised by uncertainty after all. However, you were not prepared for it to end so abruptly though. And without an apparent reason. Because Nikolai’s unit hadn’t been posted elsewhere and he hadn’t been fatally wounded. You would have heard of it were that the case. But it wasn’t.

You thought that he had come to cherish your nightly encounters too. Some of those had been full of his promises. How he’d love for you to be around when he’d eventually find the time to work on his ideas. How you had been a nice surprise, a most interesting person among so many dull idiots you were surrounded by every day. How he’d come to value your opinions and presence in his life and that he was going to find a way to make sure that that would never change. Promises that turned to be empty.

You had never allowed yourself to fully believe him. It wasn’t the first time that a boy had made the same kind of promises but Nikolai looked sincere. Honest enough to be believable. But, of course, you had been wrong.

You didn’t realise just how much you had come to rely on him until he was gone. You tried to keep your mind off him and luckily the perfect distraction came your way. The Darkling had scheduled an attack on the enemy’s army and had posted you to be on the field to take care of everyone promptly. You had never been more grateful to the man, even after he had given her a home and a purpose.

Ever since your first encounter with Nikolai, you had thought it had been a blessing. However, you had soon changed your mind and now considered a curse more than anything. Why? Because as soon as you got to the field you couldn’t help but scour the troops for a familiar mop of blond hair. Many looked like him and being this far you couldn’t be sure that he wasn’t one of them but you certainly despised the leap your heart made every time though. That was a distraction you couldn’t afford. Besides, it wasn’t smart to let your heart get involved in times of war.

The battle began, Inferni and Squallers were working together to impair the enemy’s visual so they couldn’t shoot or use their cannons while the First Army marched after them to swap in as soon as the air cleared to catch the enemy by surprise. While your role wasn’t active per se, you were a Corporalki after all, and even if you had been specifically trained as Healer, you had also got one of your friends to teach you the basics of an Heartrender’s work. You weren’t a powerful one but you could hold your ground in a fight. Especially since they weren’t expecting you. And you were still far from any real threat.

The battle dragged on and soon there were wounded soldiers that needed your attention. You hated this kind of work, it was messy and dirty and had to be quick because spending too much time on one soldier could mean dooming another to death. You were accustomed to it by now and soon found a rhythm focusing on ensuring everyone’s survival and not bothering with the aesthetic side of healing. That could be taken care of later if they wanted to.

As soon as your eyes fell onto a crouched figure you sprinted towards them. It was dirty and you didn’t recognize them but you got the feeling it was a life or death situation. Oh, how you wanted to be wrong.

The person crouching turned out to be Nikolai and he wasn’t alone. He was kneeling beside someone, Petyr.

“Where are you hurt?” you hurriedly asked as you tried to assess the damage. His uniform was dirty and full of blood but you couldn’t figure out where it was coming from. Trying to answer you, Petyr opened his mouth only to let out the most gruesome gurgling sound as his respiratory tract was flooded by blood.

“He got shot in the gut.” Nikolai offered.

“Is the bullet still inside?” Opening his uniform jacket you tore a piece from his shirt to use it to put pressure on the wound.

“It’s too late,” Nikolai uttered.

“No.” You strongly refused as you removed the cloth and focused on the wound. His heart was straightening and he had already lost a lot of blood. If the bullet was still inside that it was going to be a problem, if it wasn’t then you still had a fighting chance.

“I removed it earlier.” So that was why he had lost so much blood. Nodding your head to show that you had heard him, you set out to stop the internal bleeding. Slowing his heartbeat so that it was pumping less blood and thus eased your endeavour. You were still in the middle of the field and while you were keeping up with the warfare but in the back of your mind, you registered the sounds of screaming and of gunshots getting closer. A bullet hit you in the shoulder propelling you forward over Petyr’s body. Grisha’s kefta were bulletproof so you weren’t worried for your incolumity but for the harsh movement you had made.

Leaning back, you heard Nikolai calling for you but your eyes were trained on Petyr. You tried to listen for his heartbeat but could only hear two instead of three. Nikolai, who had never left your side, immediately understood what had happened by the fall of your shoulders and the tensing of your hands.

He kept calling for you but the only thing you could focus on was that you had let your friend down. Now there will be one more family crying for a loss, another girl mourning a lost loved one. And it was all your fault. It was because of you that Petyr wouldn’t live to see another day, to write another letter or to fight another battle. It was on you.

The details of what happened next were a bit blurred. Someway you must have found your way back to the campsite. Whether you did on your own after tending to everyone else, you didn’t know. Your memories picked up after you woke up in your tent. Someone was calling your name, saying that the Darkling wanted to see you.

Mechanically you raised and made your way to the Darkling’s tent but your mind was elsewhere. Your thoughts were plagued by Petyr’s face, by that godforsaken sound he made when he tried to speak. The realisation that he was gone hit you like a wall of brick that would have made you stumble if you weren't’ sat in front of the Darkling’s desk. Whether he was speaking and stopped after seeing the forlorn look in your eyes or he hadn’t been speaking at all, you didn’t realize. You did hear him say that you were going to be posted somewhere. Under different circumstances you have said something, anything to not let him send you away. Your mind immediately went to Nikolai. You’d be leaving him behind along with the campsite.

However, you now realised that you had already lost him. Losing Petyr had been the last thing that had completely severed your bond. There was no turning back now and part of you was grateful.

Hello Mr. "Perfectly fine"

How's your heart after breaking mine?

I've been Miss "Misery" since your goodbye

And you're Mr. "Perfectly fine"

You couldn’t know, of course, but Nikolai had left not long after you did. Albeit for a different reason. He had finally earned the Major rank and as such, he took a step back from military life deciding that his skill would be better suited for a life on the sea. Assuring Ravka the supply she needed but in ways that weren’t exactly suitable for a prince but worked just fine for a privateer. And thus Sturmhond came to life.

As for you, you kept doing your job at your new post but were relieved when a letter came from the Darkling instructing that you were needed at the Little Palace. Part of you had relegated Nikolai to that part of your mind where the unmentionable was, however, a traitor thought whispered that maybe there was a chance that you could see him at the royal grounds. Sure, the possibilities were close to zero but it was still possible, right?

No.

You already were ashamed of the fact that you’re still suffering because of him. And yes, you missed him but you weren’t going to indulge the pathetic hope of seeing him again.

He doesn’t want to see you. If he did, he would have already found you. Or write you a letter if he couldn’t, but he didn’t.

You were right. You knew you were, nonetheless, the thought only brought you a bittersweet feeling.

You found the Little Palace just how you’d left it and yet it seemed changed in a way. The insane amount of work you found there waiting for you helped you drown the feeling that it was you that had changed.

Months passed this way, sometimes the Darkling would post you with him or outside the Little Palace. All in all, you’ve kept busy. When news of the little prince leaving the Palace reached you, you let it wash over you. It wasn’t like it mattered much, whether he was a few feet away or in another nation, Nikolai wasn’t part of your life either way.

When the whole expansion of the Fold happened, you were stationed at the Little Palace. Chaos and terror ensued as soon as the news reached the capital making most of the Grisha flee. Most of them went looking for the Darkling while others simply ran away and hid. You were amongst the first group.

Soon, your life was radically changed. The shift in the Darkling was palpable and it didn’t have anything to do with the scars on his face. You had tried your best to heal them and Genya to tailor them away but somehow, they could not be removed. It was an unsettling thing to realize that they didn’t take away his beauty. One could even say that they enhanced his attractiveness.

He was certainly more powerful. None of you knew what had happened in the Fold that day, just that the Sun Summoner had fled and that there were no survivors apart from him. However, as your journey in pursuit of Alina dragged on, you were soon witnesses of his newfound power.

The nichevo’ya, he called them.

He had always been immensely powerful. One of a kind. But this- this was different. And as dread settled among your group as you watched them in action, realisation sat heavily on your shoulders.

He soon found a trail and traced Alina in Novyi Zem and set out to reach the island by hiring Sturmhond’s crew. He was a famous pirate after all and despite his unreliability, the Darkling was sure that as long as he got his money, he wouldn't be a problem.

In the round trip, you didn’t see much of the captain anyway. Some members of his crew were amiable enough, particularly the Yul-Baatar twins. You had even asked Tamar to spar with you from time to time. Your lessons with Botnik were a distant memory and you knew that mastering combat training skills could increase your chance at survival.

When Alina and Mal were held captive though, that’s when Sturmhond made an appearance. He looked younger than you’d thought and there was something oddly familiar in the way he held himself. Still, you didn't talk with him much. Your job was to take care of Alina and so you spent most of your time in her room.

It wasn’t until the Darkling asked Mal to track Rusalye and consequently spent more time with Alina that you had a chance to talk with him. It was during one of your night shifts when he approached you, the Darkling had wanted some of his to always be patrolling the ship.

“What could possibly make a little thing like you be amidst this wretched company?”

“It’s all a matter of perspective, I guess.”

“The thrill of adventure?”

“There’s plenty of it everywhere you go if you’re Grisha, even if you just go on a stroll.”

“Is that why you follow him?”

“I owe everything to him.”

“I’m sure you realize your role in this.”

“Of course I do. I’m not some naive girl who has a crush on her general.”

“Ah, so who, pray tell, do you have a crush on then, beautiful lady?”

“You’re certainly noisy for a pirate.”

“Privateer,” he corrected you, “there’s not much to do around here is it?”

“Not if you have everyone taking care of it, no.”

“Amuse me.”

“It isn’t wise to let the heart get involved in times of war.” That was all you were willing to share. Yes, he was handsome. Yes, the twinkle in his eyes was oddly familiar but he was a stranger. A dangerous one.

“Those sound like words spoken from experience.”

“Maybe.”

“Well, I’d say it’s no fun to only think about war. Life is so much more.”

“Believe me, if I could, it’d be the last thing on my mind. But, alas, l don’t have the privilege to do so.”

You had already lost too much time speaking with him. If someone were to see you or tell the Darkling you’d be in trouble. And you had made it your goal to never put yourself on the path of the Darkling’s anger. So you excused yourself and went back to your rounds.

If only you had stayed and talked to him more maybe you would have understood what was about to happen. Maybe you would have had an enkindling of Sturmhond’s plans. Instead, you were taken by surprise, just like everyone in your group, when Rusalye was spot and a shot was fired. You had found yourself in the uncomfortable position of having to fight against people you had grown to like.

“I don’t want to hurt you, y/n,” Tamar warned you as you stood face to face on the sinking ship dock. Her trusted axes in her hands while your hands were raised ready to attack.

“I don’t want to hurt you either.”

“Then you don’t have to. Come with us.” Her proposition made you gasp.

“That would be treason,” you whispered hoping that the Darkling wasn’t around to hear you. A shiver ran through you as you thought of the punishment he’d give you for even thinking about leaving his side.

“Then you leave me no choice.” She said lowering her arms. Was that guilt you heard in her voice?

Before you could voice your question though, she shouted for her brother and not even a second later, you felt your body grow still. Your eyebrows faltered as you felt your heartbeat slow down.

They were Grisha.

They must have seen you realise because you heard Tamar apologize before everything went black.

Mr. "Never told me why"

He goes about his day

Forgets he ever even heard my name

Well, I thought you might be different than the rest, I guess you're all the same

You didn’t stay out for long though. As soon as Sturmhond’s crew had left the Darkling’s ship and had safely made it onto the Volkvolny, the privateer had asked for you to be awakened.

There wasn’t enough light for you to realize you were on another ship, what alerted you of your new situation were your hands. They had bound them behind your back. Immediately you started to struggle, hoping to wiggle out of the restraints. To no avail though. Huffing out in frustration, you settled for looking around you and see if there was something you could use. That’s when you noticed him.

“Release me- this instant, or else-”

“Or what? You’re a Healer. Not exactly a violent job, is it?” Sturmhond interrupted you, a smirk on his face since he had the upper hand.

“I don’t need my powers to kick you in the ass, do I?” He laughed but didn’t look remotely threatened. Rather amused, actually.

“Please, you have to let me go. He’ll kill me if-” Panic started to build as you realized that there was no way you could successfully escape.

“He won’t touch you.” A solemn glow took over his eyes. “He won’t ever hurt you again, you have my word.” He promised, looking subtly at your left shoulder. You winced as you realized that he must have seen your scars. The ones left by the Darkling’s niche’voya.

“How can I know if you’re trustworthy? You don’t exactly have a good score, you know?”

“You’re going to find out soon enough. Don’t worry.”

Of course, he didn’t bother offering further explanations. He’d left it at that. You weren’t a captive per se but he left your hands bound, only freeing them when you needed to eat or relieve yourself.

Fruitless were your efforts in making you tell more. He often ate with you and would check in at least twice a day but that was it.

It wasn’t until after you had landed after that forsaken vehicle of his had gotten you through the Fold that you understood. His coming out as Nikolai Lanstov, prince and second in line for the Ravkan throne, had shaken you all to your core. However, you doubted that it had sent a pang to the others’ hearts as it did with yours.

Nikolai Lantsov. The man you had been dreaming about, the one that had left you behind without any sort of explanations, the one you missed so dearly, had been by your side all this time.

You weren’t sure how you felt. It made sense now why his eyes looked familiar and his posture. You then connected that the vehicle you had used in the Fold had been one of the many projects he used to geek about with you. It tasted a lot like betrayal. Not because he had lied to you about his name but because he had tried to get close to you again and had managed to somehow break that growing bond again.

'Cause I hear he's got his arm 'round a brand-new girl

I've been pickin' up my heart, he's been pickin' up her

So dignified in your well-pressed suit

So strategized, all the eyes on you

Oh, he's so smug, Mr. "Always wins"

So far above me in every sense

So far above feeling anything

Even if his secret had been outed thus causing some shift in the dynamics between Nikolai and the two new members of his crew - you suspected Mal was closer to punching him every second that passed- not much had changed for you.

On the outside, you pretty much looked like a prisoner. Albeit a very clean one. You rode with them, hands still bound, scowl ever-present on your face.

Nikolai had not come to see you ever since that night after the Fold. And now it had been almost a week since you had started your journey back to the capital. Whether this was all part of his plan to make you look the part of the captive even more or he was just gutless, you didn't know. It was working either way though.

You liked to think that his reason was simply that he didn't care. He had far too much on his plate right now as it was. Going back to court after years of absence while also making claims to the throne and trying to sway the Sun Summoner your way. It was no easy feat. But hadn't he always liked to say that impossible often meant improbable? A lot of things had changed since that night but even so, you'd still pose your bet on him that he'd be able to achieve anything he set his mind to.

It wasn't exactly that thinking this way brought you actual comfort. Of course, not. But it was better than foolishly hoping for him to still care about you the way you did for him. After all, he had sent plenty of signals that pointed in the other direction.

But then why did he kidnap you? Why take you with him? You weren't that close to the Darkling to be of any use to Nikolai in that way. And, as a matter of fact, no one had come to interrogate you regarding his plans or whereabouts. Then why?

You still couldn't figure it out.

Some days your anger shifted more to frustration and you were ounces away from asking for him yourself. Almost as if he had heard you though, he gave you the final push.

It was the usual day, Nikolai and Alina were riding in the carriage, stopping in every village we passed to meet with the locals. However, this time, before climbing back into the carriage, they kissed.

You were too far to figure out who started it and the details. The gist of it was enough though.

You most certainly were a fool. Still thinking about a guy who didn't give two shits about you, who had kidnapped you putting you in a dangerous situation and you were still wondering whether he felt something for you or not? Pathetic.

You had to do something about your situation and quickly too. Officially, you were a traitor. You had fled and joined the Darkling, that wouldn't make you look good in front of the king. He was a lousy bastard anyway and will probably sentence you to death to set an example. You hadn't survived so much shit to end up at the end of a rope.

So, even though you had initially thought against it since you were so close to home, you decided to escape. You were already headed towards certain death so what was the worst that could happen?

Your hands were left unbound when you were in your tent. One less problem to solve. Closing your eyes, you focused on listening for any nearby heartbeats. You heard two, those of the guards posted outside your tent. Maybe you could find an excuse to call them inside, put them to sleep and then slip away.

That was not exactly what your powers were for but you were desperate. You had to at least try.

And so you did. You called them in and immediately set out to slow their heartbeats. You had almost succeeded in putting them under when someone else slipped in. The last person you wanted to see.

"Am I that bad of a host?"

You didn't meet his ruse though, you knew it would make you lose focus.

"I'm afraid I have to ask you to release my soldiers." As soon as he said it though, they fell unconscious at last. Your chest was heaving by now, using so much power in such a different way was costing you. But you couldn't back down now. It was one on one and you were Grisha and a woman scorned. He stood no chance.

"Move out of my way, your highness."

"I'm afraid I can't do that."

"You can or I can make you. Your choice." The venom in your voice was unmistakable and it took him by surprise. He gave you a curious look tilting his head to the side like he was seeing you for the first time over again.

"I didn't realize ruthlessness was one of your personality traits."

"You know nothing about me," you seethed. The tip of your fingers flexed, the tension in the room could be cut with a knife and you were already weary.

"It may have been a while y/n, but I like to think I know a good deal about you."

"And I would like to completely erase this last year but you don't hear me yap about how shitty it has been, do you?"

"You never did like opening up much."

"I'm well past the point of sentimentalism, Nikolai. It is coming far too late anyway. And whatever my feelings for you may be, I won't let you put my life on the line." Your posture straightened, stance ready for battle.

His eyes flashed, jaw clenched. His hands closed in fists and he almost looked hurt. But why would he?

"Is that what you think all of this is?" Nikolai always acted aloof. He was always composed and dignified. You had thought it was for his insane amount of self-confidence but now you understood it was for how he was raised. But you recognised the pout on his lips. It was the expression he’d always have whenever he tried to get something from getting to him. To prevent himself from showing emotions.

"You're holding me captive while you go around Ravka parading your latest conquest, flashing your return everywhere. I don't know why you're doing this but I don't care. I've stopped waiting around for you and I certainly won't let your father put me to death."

"You think I'd let him?"

"So you want to do this?" you threw your hands up in exasperation, "Fine. You really want to know what I think?"

"Be my guest."

"I think that the Nikolai I knew would have left out of the blue without so much as a letter. I think that the Nikolai I knew was ready to go to any length to achieve what he believed in. However, I thought that the Nikolai I knew cared about me and what we had but look at me now. So maybe, I know nothing at all."

"You certainly do seem to know a lot of things. But you’re not wrong."

"If this is the way you care about me," I gesture to my tent, "then I'm not sure I want this Nikolai to care for me."

“This,” he said, emulating your gesture, “is to keep you safe. This is my way to ensure that if the Darkling got news of your whereabouts, he’d be sure not to think you willingly left his side and betrayed him.”

“That’s because I didn’t!” You raised your voice in outrage. The nerve of this man.

“Spare me your indignation. I know you hate being at his beck and call, to do his dirty work and be constantly surrounded by warfare.”

“Do not presume to speak for me.” You snapped. You knew it was best to keep a cool head but his cockiness was getting on your nerves.

“Didn’t you? Hate it, I mean.”

“We’re at war, Nikolai. Being away or close to the Darkling won’t change that. At least with him, I was safe.”

“You can’t be that delusional to think that he was protecting you.” He scoffed at your words as if they were the most absurd thing he had ever heard.

“And you can’t be that delusional to think that bringing me back won’t result in your father killing me.” You fired back shifting on your feet. He winced as if you had physically hurt him.

“You have so little faith in me?” His voice was just above a whisper and you knew that your words had struck a chord.

“How can I have any, Nikolai?” your voice softened a bit. “One day you’re telling me how much you value my opinion, you promise me a future where I’d be the first to see your project come to life and then you left. You just left, Nikolai.” And when I was starting to make my peace with it that’s when you come back? Also, let’s not forget about my abduction and your flirting with Alina.”

“So yes, I don’t trust you.” You concluded, crossing your arms on your chest with finality. He just stared at you for the longest time. If someone would come in now, they’d think you were in the middle of a staring contest. Then he sighed and started talking.

“I had to go away. I had already pushed my parents’ limits when I said I wanted to be part of the infantry. So, one day I got a letter written by my father personally and I knew that my time was up. I had been Nikolai for too long, now I had to start being a Lantsov prince.” His eyes were on the ground now, shame making her way in his words.

“So that’s what I did,” he went as he started pacing,”I went to Kerch to study, just like my father wanted. I did what he asked, he couldn’t reproach me anything now. I could never stay too still though, a life of adventure was calling me and I could not ignore it. It was only then that I realized that I could do so much more than sitting in a class, to realistically help Ravka.”

“I couldn’t take you with me. You had such a larger role to play in the army and besides, there wasn’t much I could offer you. So yes, I left. I left thinking that I would find my way back to you eventually.” He had stopped by now, regret was swirling in his shining orbs as he looked at you.

“You could have told me.” You contestated, taken back by all the information he gave you. “I would have waited for you.” A whispered promise for something that would never be now.

“I was afraid, y/n. That’s not my best moment, I know and no number of apologies could ever make it right. But I was afraid of your answer. I knew I’d be asking for a lot and let’s be honest-” the desperation in his tone was evident now, he had unconsciously started to lean towards you but you knew what he was about to say.

“You weren’t sure if the future you were offering me would just end up with me being your mistress, am I right?” Your tone hardened but despite the insulting implication of what you said, you weren’t made at him.

“I’m a prince, y/n. We do not marry for love and this country cannot afford to disregard the advantages that a political union could bring.”

His honesty was as refreshing as it was unsettling. He was right. As soon as you had learned he was a prince, you realized just what kind of future you could have with him. But then he left and that problem did not exist anymore. Neither of you spoke, both of you were seizing the other. You had laid it all out, defences were down putting you both in a vulnerable position.

And someday maybe you'll miss me

“You should have talked to me, Nikolai. We could have figured it out together. If it came to being your mistress to stay with you, then that was my decision to make.” You said softly after a while. It pained for you to say this, you would have never thought that getting closure would hurt this much.

Tears streamed on both of your faces, in front of you had been laid what your future could have looked like. It was everything you had wanted, you could still do your job and have the man of your dreams. You were surprised to find that you wouldn’t mind sharing him with his supposed wife. You had been at court for enough time to know how most marriages went. If he assured you it was only a diplomatic affair but that his heart was yours, that would have been enough. Who knows, maybe she’ll get a lover too.

But now… now you didn’t know if you could ignore everything that happened. You did not trust him nor could you ignore how hurt you were by his lack of communication and thus of trust in you.

But by then, you'll be Mr. "Too late"

#nikolai lantsov #nikolai lantsov x reader #nikolai lantsov imagine #nikolai lantsov imagines #nikolai lanstov one shot #nikolai lanstov fic #nikolai lanstov x you #nikolai lanstov x y/n #shadow and bone #grishaverse #nikolai lanstov angst #nikolai lanstov fluff #nikolai lanstov blurb

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flydotnet · 4 years ago

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Bad Things Happen Bingo! The event where you send me requests according to this marvelous card! (Red cross is the completed prompt, character headshots are prompts I’ve already filled. I don’t have any request left, so feel free to send in suggestions for this card!).

Like blood on a patch of fresh snow.

I'm not sure of where this fic went, but... oh well. I don't want to look at it for much longer, so here y'all go, 1.9K words of whatever this is. I really wanted to write more NaomiLG because I love them, but I realize I'm really not their best writer, so I need to hone my skills. Take this weird-ass oneshot with a very specific and picturesque prompt as an attempt to nail them. It was fun to imagine all of the red-on-white imagery, at least. Title comes from a Rammstein song because it played while I was writing this and I figured, y'know, it means "red rose", so why not make it the title? It at least sounds epic to someone like me who knows shit about German. No correlation to the lyrics, though, far from it lmao.

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Rosenrot

Summary: Naomi's past catches up to her in a street as someone else's blood spills for her.

Fandom: Trauma Team (spoilers for TC:SO and TT) Ship: Naomi/Little Guy

Wordcount: 1.9K words

Event hosted by @badthingshappenbingo

AO3 version available here.

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Like a widow who had lost her spouse, Naomi started wearing black after losing her ability to save lives. Back then, she didn’t really know why, probably to remind her of the sins she still had to expiate. It felt weird to her to wear white again, since it kept reminding her of the life she had to leave behind, that of a lifesaver whom people trusted with literally all they had left.

Even now, even as her life has gone back on track (she has a stable job, a daughter and friends who hold her in great esteem – things she thought she’d never have until a year ago), she continues wearing black because it feels more comfortable to be able to fade back into the shadows would she ever need to slip back into the night. She can’t ever live in the broad daylight, not anymore she knows this; but, as long as Alyssa doesn’t mind, then she doesn’t have a reason to complain. The cold and silence have their perks.

Wearing black, at first, was to hide stains when she was working with Delphi. God knows there was little hygiene there, so blood could easily show on clothing when they weren’t careful. Wearing black robes (or whatever outfit they had given her that looked very little like a robe) allowed them to conceal the dark reds and rusts more easily without having to think about it too much. Out of sight, out of mind, she supposed.

On the other hand, blood is too visible on white. Of course, it is the point of wearing it for surgical procedures, since it’s easier to disinfect – it’s still too visible for people like Delphi or, in a way, her. Even to this day, seeing reddish stains on white fabric makes her uneasy, reminding her of things she’d much rather never think about again. She’s like the black-clad widow staring at the radiant bride with a wine stain on her dress: she knows what she lost and has the feeling of seeing a bad omen.

There is this one thing about Delphi she has stopped minding, and it’s Little Guy, or whatever his real identity was supposed to be. If he reminded her of their dark past not too long ago, he now represents what they could become: atoners, working for “the right side” for once, working in the shadows to help the living move on like they’ve had to. Unlike her, he didn’t let himself dwell on the past, preferring to get moving.

The moment she understood it the most when he started to wear white more than black, renouncing to the colour she was always used to see him dress. It felt weird, at first, but he knew how to pull it off, and she got used to the new habits. Never dwell on the past, let herself get swiped away by the changing winds. Moreover, Alyssa really liked it whenever he’d drop by the house after driving her home after work or getting Alyssa from school when she couldn’t.

But now, the past has caught back to them. Ex-Delphi members have found them again, motivated by the recent rise (and fall, but they forgot about that second time) of Adam’s nephew trying to bring the virus back right as PGS cases flare up across the USA. They’re not running away, this time: she did that enough when going to seek amnesty in Europe, so now, she better prepare herself to strike. Little Guy already cocks his FBI-licenced gun out, intending to strike judging by the little tremors in his fingers.

It goes in a flash: a couple bangs, blood spilling on the ground, dirt and smoke and iron fill the air of an urban cul-de-sac. The commotion is such that it’s difficult to follow anything until the stench of violence lifts up and so does the smog it created. For a moment, she believes they may have both gotten killed, and that she’s already passing into the afterlife, in denial of everything, not ready to face death nor discover if there is, indeed, something on the “other side” that isn’t roaming around this world and calling the “voodoo hotline”.

One thing quickly becomes clear: she is still alive. In fact, everyone is somehow still alive, because she sees their three assailants with their weapons on the floor and wounds in their legs: they were only harmed to disarm them. She pats her own clothes and body to check if she hasn’t been injured, remembering reflexes she had thought long gone coming back to her in a moment’s notice. To her fortune, she seems okay, as she only feels dirt, dry clothing and skin under her fingers’ touch.

Seeing the men lie on the ground in pain, she already grabs her phone and calls for help, going into not too many details for everyone’s safety and privacy.

“Little Guy,” she starts calling to her partner so they can get away from this place before being brought into this, her finger about to swipe the call off, “let’s go.”

His response is delayed.

“Sure… Sure thing.”

His voice sounds strangled and hesitant, drier than her clothes, and it prompts her to turn around. As soon as she does, however, her own breath gets caught in her throat as her entire body tenses up. Her mind, which was until now fixated on running as far as possible from the scene before they were going to be questioned about the bullets in their pursuers’ limbs, immediately switches to the same sort of panic she felt in Caduceus Europe all those years ago when she witnessed a fellow surgeon collapse in pain.

Little Guy!

He’s sitting on the ground, back against the wall that cornered them until now, a hand loosely holding onto his gun, the other barely holding onto a striking red stain on his clear, monochrome attire. It’s expanding moment after moment, replacing the immaculate white of his shirt and suit jacket with a much darker colour. If it was only the bloodstained clothes, it’d have been fine, no matter how much this man frets over such things – but it’s not what is scaring her so much about this.

“Little Guy, what happened?!”

As he struggles to get an answer out, she takes his pulse: there, obviously, since he’s breathing, but weakening. His breathing is quick but shuddering, as if fragile like glass.

“One… one of them was armed,” he replies, swallowing every few words. “One bullet hit… my flank, I think?”

Not caring for the nail polish Alyssa put on her fingers last night, Naomi digs under the bloodstained jacket and where the incriminated wound must be. There, she confirms Navel’s suspicions: it’s indeed in his flank.

“If my assumption is correct, it shouldn’t have hurt an organ,” she says, a little bit of relief pulsing through her. “We need to get you into a hospital asap, though, you’re bleeding profusely.”

She grabs back her phone, which she previously slipped into her pocket, and adds the information on a fourth wounded. She gives more information on their location and the circumstances, merely forgetting to mention this is all because of Delphi’s doings and their smothered shady pasts, and stays on the line, putting the phone in speaker mode so she doesn’t miss crucial information.

“You should go, Dr Kimishima,” Navel whispers, eyes getting glassy and unfocused, the speed at which this happens prompting her to check the wound again. The blood has spread even further, making the fabric stick to the wound. “Don’t… let them catch up to you.”

“You’re an idiot if you think I’m leaving you for dead. Plus, I’d rather have to search for amnesty again than get pursued for not helping someone in critical need.”

It’s the pragmatic way to say she’d never handle having his blood on her hands and his death on her conscience. He, however, doesn’t reply, letting uncomfortable silence install itself as they wait for assistance to arrive.

When they do, the sirens’ shrills muffle Navel’s breathing, lights almost covering the blood stains on his suit and her fingers, slipping under her nails, drying out already.

It could, however, never erase the image from her mind.

-----------------------

Naomi waits in this bedroom, all alone and in silence, for a little while. She doesn’t know how long exactly (probably around half an hour, although it feels like more than that), all she knows is that the chair she’s sitting on isn’t very comfortable and that she needs to remember when to pick Alyssa from school; two things that, for the moment being, don’t matter much.

The weather is beautiful, today. Even earlier, when they were outside, there was a gentle breeze blowing through their hair. She merely forgot about it due to thinking about literally anything else under the sun, mostly her colleague whom she found out wasn’t just randomly hit during the kerfuffle. To be fair, she should’ve guessed that was what had happened when she suddenly found herself on the ground rather than standing, but…

She suddenly hears Little Guy stirring and, finally, opening an eye. His injuries were fortunately not as grievous as she was afraid they’d be, even if he’s clearly landed himself for at least a week in the hospital. What an idiot.

“Doc… Doctor Kimishima…?”

“Go back to sleep, Little Guy, you still sound like you’ve pulled a week-long all-nighter.”

As if obeying her (but most likely because losing this much blood tends to leave you weak, and his corpulence isn’t exactly one that’d take kindly to blood loss), his eyelids flutter; but he doesn’t go back to sleep. At least, not yet.

“Are you okay…?” He asks, voice recovering some clarity, even if it’s unlike his usual swagger.

“I’m pretty sure I should be the one asking you that, you know; but I’m okay. Better off than you, that’s for sure.”

He chuckles once before groaning in pain.

“Urgh, I forgot how sore post-surgery was…”

“You’ll get used to it. Believe me, I know.”

“I’m sure you do, Dr Kimishima.”

She drops the playful banter for something else altogether.

“Oh, and, Little Guy?”

“Yes…?”

“Never do that again. I don’t want to see you covered in your own blood again.”

His face, which is slowly regaining more colour, distorts a little.

“Even if…”

“Even if it means saving my life.”

He looks aside, in silence. She guesses he’s unable to honestly give her the answer she wants to hear, so he instead prefers not to say anything. Well, that’s something she expected would happen: people have told her he was wrapped around her little finger. Too bad that this man got infatuated with someone like her whom death and misfortune follow her every step. He doesn’t seem to mind, though, considering the number of close calls he found himself in when he was by her side. You sometimes have to wonder what other people even think…

“I’ll… I’ll try,” he eventually replies.

Naomi can’t stay upset about it forever, especially when she sees how dishevelled and vulnerable he looks with his hair askew, dark rings under his eyes and hospital gown, so far from the sharply-dressed bachelor she’s come to appreciate.

“Good. Just be careful and we’ll be clear.”

“Sure thing, ma’am.”

As long as he doesn’t mind being so close to death, she’ll make sure he doesn’t meet it.

#bad things happen bingo #trauma center #trauma team #naomi kimishima #little guy navel #how do you even tag this dude #bthb #bloodstained clothes #my writing

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shananigans402 · 4 years ago

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Playlist!

I cannot even express how happy it makes me to get messages/asks that some of you are listening to (and enjoying) the Obstacles playlist.

Music is so special to me and I put quite a few of my favorite songs and artists on the playlist. I’d actually kind of love it if anyone wants to reach out and send a message or an ask (anon or non-anon) about the playlist. You can let me know if you prefer the Dani or Jamie section, if there are any songs you like or don’t like, if there are any songs you heard for the first time that are stuck in your head lol. Feel free to ask me anything or talk to me about any of it; I could talk about music all day.

As I mentioned before, if you have suggestions for songs that fit the theme and 70′s-80′s timeframe let me know! I saw the reply to my last message from giadune about Lucky Star - lol I know, I need to add that because of Owen’s comment in chapter 14...I’ll add it now

#thank you all for listening #your kind words about it mean so much to me #please come talk to me about it if you want to

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uwurakax · 4 years ago

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200 followers event ♡

Hey, hey, hey all! ♡

oh my gosh, so while i was under (just wisdom teeth removal, no one cares but 😜✌️), I reached 200 followers so I thought while I can’t do what I normally do i’d hold an event yay! So lucky for you all i know 🤪 it’s a special day, so whoop whoop!!

{list of stories for this event here}

♡ {but i’ll take this time to say thank you all so much! 🥺whether you follow for my smau’s, aesthetics, my now new writing pieces or kareshi translations i just want to say it makes me so happy! can’t smile so i’m smiling in spirit ok! and i’d love to be more interactive. thank you so much for showing an interest in any of my posts 🥺💕}

the event: for the 200 follower event, i decided to split it into 2. feel free to do both! again totally wanna do more interaction! i’m way to shy irl and online but willing to try! ♡

status: closed

part one: so the first part of the event is writing/drabbles! they will be (haikyuu character) x reader {this is what i am most comfortable with}. to be a part of it, just do the following: ♡

send in a song or you can be more specific with a song lyric or lyrics

add in a haikyuu character 💕✨

if you’d like the reader to have no specific gender please let me know, otherwise i will default to fem!reader

i’ll write a little short story/drabble based on the lyrics or vibe of the song with the character you choose (the lyrics will not be specifically in the song just vibes)

you can be a bit more specific with the request! if you had a feeling during the song and want that added feel free! i am pretty lenient hehe 😜

rules:

❥ please keep it to one song per request! i however will accept 2 different lines/lyrics from different or the same songs (you can also totally request as many times as you want! the more the merrier! yayay)

❥ you can also request a song, and have the feel of it, but want a specific line in correlation to the story (for example; you can request off the table by ariana grande and say you really like the lyric ‘cause i aint her and you aint him thankfully’)

❥ if you request a song, i will listen to it and get the feel/vibes along with the lyrics, but if you just request lyrics I won’t

❥ you can add more than one haikyuu character if the song calls for it (for example any songs about infidelity #sorry 😜)

❥ also please note that i unfortunately cannot write for a male!reader. no gender specified is okay however!

❥ i will also not write (haikyuu character) x (haikyuu character) - sorry about that but i know i’ll be bias, and i would prefer to stray away from any ships {this keeps us all happy 😊}

❥ the drabbles/stories will also only be SFW! i can write suggestive or implied, but i’m not comfortable writing explicit work. thanks for understanding 💕

(i listen to pop songs - take that with what you will lol)

examples:

hi! can i please request that’s what i like by bruno mars with daichi?

can i please have osamu & suna with the song unfaithful by rihanna?

can i request kyōtani with the lyrics “if i got locked away, and we lost it all today, tell me honestly would you still love me the same?”

hey, can i pls get “just dancing the night away, boy you feel like a holiday” and “know my love infinite, nothing i wouldn’t do” with kita?

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

part two: don’t want a story? all good! feel free to chat or whatever haha. can send anything you want i don’t care nor mind. wanna ask something? go for it - i just wanna chat and have more interaction with my antisocial self. wanna thirst and simp over any of the haikyuu boys *cough* oikawa *cough* feel free! let’s be friends :D ✌️

❥ feel free to add in a question/s if you request anything also!

just thanks again so much! if not for tumblr/haikyuu i wouldn’t have gotten back into writing and i forgot how much i actually enjoy/love it.

#*˖ ⊹ event ⟶ 200 followers ⋅#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #hq!! x reader #haikyuu x you #hq x you #haikyuu!! x you #hq!! x you #200 followers #200 follower event

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gallaghercest · 5 years ago

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REPOST: Evidence #1 - Noel’s Sexuality

Hello! So, I’m reposting this 2017 post because Tumblr deleted it.

Enjoy!

— x — x — x —

Good evening, class! It’s been a long time but I’m back. It took so long because I needed plenty of time to arrange everything correctly, because tonight we’ll have a long post. And I’m back with such a polemic subject to talk about. That’s right: Noel Gallagher’s sexuality. Pretty much a taboo in the whole fandom.

I actually realised this should have been my first post here, since it’s focused much more on the 80s, but, well, it’s all said and done now, so just pretend you read this post first, ok?

Before starting I know that there will probably be someone/some people who will go “but jULIA YOU CAN’T TALK ABOUT THIS, IT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, IT’S TOO PERSONAL, YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT NOEL AND HIS GAYNESS AA A A A A A A”

And I’ll tell you what, kids: I’d rather walk I HAVE the right to talk about this, I’m his fan, I have the evidences, I’ve done researches, essays, everything you can imagine, and my conclusion is: it’s not my fault if he prefers to stay inside the closet LG x

So, take your seats and here we go!

Disclaimer: this is a bunch of evidences I made by myself, based in conversations I had with my friends and months of analysis, suffering, nights of insomnia and tears. Don’t know if everything is veridical, but at least, it’s a way that I found to “light” up our way and try to find some proper fucking answers to this stuff.

Well, I bet lots of you have already wondered (at least once in your lifetimes) about Noel’s sexuality, because, honestly, it’s something really confusing if you stop to think about it. The guy fucking hooked up with his brother, that’s already a good point to start. But I’ll try to list all the evidences on a chronological order.

1-) This Charming Man

This one is more like a deduction but ok. Yes, the famous Smiths’ song always had an important role on Noel’s life. It was the first song he learned to play on guitar. It was his main inspiration to become a musician as soon he saw The Smiths playing it on Top Of The Pops in 1983.

But, a 16 year old Noel who hated school and all type of book obviously didn’t understand the references and the lyrics meaning of any song as a 21 year old Noel could.

There’s a quote from Noel, which I think it’s from the NGHFB era already – but it might be from the late Oasis years, who knows – which I couldn’t find now, but I promise I’ll try my best to find it. If you know it, you can send it to me, too. The point is that, basically, Noel was asked by the interviewer why would he play the same fucking songs in every single gig.

Noel answered that, when he attended his first Smiths’ gig, which I’m sure it was in late 80s, he wanted them to play This Charming Man SO SO SO SO SO MUCH, and they had played it on their last gig, or on the last week’s gig, something like this, so Noel was really hopeful about it. The point is: they didn’t play it on the gig that Noel attended, and he got pretty much traumatised over that. So, he claims he plays the same songs every single gig because of that happening.

But, now, I ask you: As I said, this song was always important to him. But, as he grew old, he might have understood the lyrics more – This Charming Man’s lyrics clearly talks about homosexuality and an affair between a guy from working class and a guy from an upper class, you can read more about it on Genius, I guess. And now that he was older, maybe he identified more with the song in general.

He said once that as soon as he heard This Charming Man, everything made sense, even though he didn’t know any literature references and stuff like that – so he admitted that he didn’t get the lyrics at first. And this is important because I’m not telling you he had homosexual tendencies since he was born, it came after years and years.

2-) “Effeminate Phase” AKA Manchester Mauler

In the Definitely Maybe DVD, when talking about the “Give me gin and tonic” bit from Supersonic with Mark Coyle (11:30), Noel mentions that he must have been going through one of his – ONE OF, IT MEANS HE HAD LOTS OF – ‘effeminate phases’ to be drinking gin and tonic at that time.

He even joked once in an interview with Zane Lowe that when Peggy asked him why did he kept in his room 24/7 playing guitar, he answered, joking, “because I’m gay” :’))))))))))))

And now, the thing that I guess it’s the most iconic thing about Noel’s sexuality: if you search on Google “Is Noel Gallagher gay?” you will find an anonymous answer (that actually was answered by The WikiAnswers Community™), which goes:

“Definitely! He’s known as the Manchester Mauler. A refrerence to his brutal homosexual appetite durring his youth in Manchester, England.”

And in case you’re wondering “what the fuck does Mauler mean?”, Urban Dictionary will help you:

(I censored it because maybe Tumblr would block it again if I didn’t)

Let me tell you: this is my favourite piece of information of the entire Oasis history. It doesn’t come from any reliable source but the point is: I don’t doubt it. It’s the truth to me.

3-) Clint Boon

This is probably the most important evidence – so important that it’s why I’ve chosen it to illustrate the post. Noel’s years as a roadie were, obviously, wild.

Everything started when he auditioned to be the new singer of Inspiral Carpets. As we all know, he wasn’t accepted, but he was asked to be a roadie, in case he was interested. I don’t want to be pretentious but I have lots of friends who think that the job was only offered to him because Clint was already interested, BUT ANYWAY.

It’s common to see lots of photos of Clint and Noel together, we all know. And very suspicious photos, in fact. Some of them are not even with Clint, for example. The one where Noel is almost kissing a guy with a hand on his **** is actually Graham. And you can tell it because Graham’s hair was shorter than Clint’s (it’s the third photo of the collage above)

Noel was already asked by this photo on an interview and he was BOLD ENOUGH to deny the kiss:

“Interviewer: There’s a quite famous photo of you snogging Clint [Boon] from The lnspiral Carpets.

Noel: Oh no, that was Graham [Lambert, Inspirals guitarist]. Yeah. We weren’t actually kissing, though.

I: It looked like you were.

N: Yeah, yeah, it did look like it. But I can assure you.”

Anyway, the point is, we know Noel can assure they weren’t kissing because the only guy he would kiss was Clint. Ok, seriously now: we know that Noel used to take suspicious photos with his friends, while they drank and did drugs.

You can even see Noel shotgunning – the act of blowing weed or simply cigarette’s smoke on another person’s, usually your partner’s, mouth, and maybe even kissing – on the 4th and 5th photo from the beginning of the post. Notice that both photos were taken at the same night (their clothes are the same) and with the same guy.

Ah, and we have the matching haircuts as well. Thing we saw happening to Liam and Noel too (1997, 1999…)

(please don’t ever let this photo die)

Well. My point here is not the photos, not even the haircuts at all. It’s Clint. The amount of photos/footage we have of Noel with Clint is much more significant than the ones we have with the rest of the band. For example, Noel’s not seen in bed with any other member than Clint.

Actually, I have more things to talk of Clint, but I’ll leave it to another post.

And more: on the book “Carpet Burns: Life with Inspiral Carpets”, by Tom Hingley, the lead singer, contains a quote where Clint claims that Noel taught him another use for the airplane tables (thanks, Mat, for the useful info!). Another use. If you know what I mean.

But the most extraordinary thing is that, coincidence or not, there’s a Inspiral’s song, called Dragging me Down, written by Clint, released on 1992 – when Noel was already gone and in Oasis –, that strangely makes references to planes, travels, sky and flying. Behold:

Now, it’s up to you to patch things together.

AND DON’T YOU GET ME TO TALK ABOUT THIS:

4-) Random Noel’s quotes through the years

This one is probably the more common and easy-to-find evidence. I’ll just give the examples I recall now, but if you have more in mind, feel free to share it so I can add it to this post!

I don’t know what happened to Noel in the ‘Russell Brand 6Music show’ on 2006, because somehow he said a lot of things there.

Noel insisted that if he was gay, he’d be the biggest gay in the world, saying “I would be gayer than Freddie Mercury”, and then, Russell suggested that the 3AM girls might be interested in Noel suddenly getting in touch with his gay side, to which Noel replied:

“In a manner of speaking, I may have done already.”

Bingo!

And there’s that one from 1 Leicester Square, also being interviewed by Russell Brand, where they even talk a little about Noel’s years as a roadie, and Noel later says he was “very in touch” with his “effeminate side” (again!) and that Noel was a girl’s name¿? Russell says Liam has a “sexualised arrogance” and I confess I’m really like ?¿?¿where did you get it, son?¿?¿? because I really do think it’s something Noel thinks at the deep heart, not something Russell Brand could say, actually.

And again, there’s another quote, from another Russell Brand BBC2 show from 29th July 2008: “I like a few women but I like men an awful lot more.” He even continues and say “I call myself straight, but I’m GAY!”. “If I went to call myself bisexual, it would be equally, if not more misleaded (?), I’m not undecided or bi-curious either” Then, Noel asks “Matt, can you come up with a new word for people who are mostly straight but a little gay or mostly gay but a little straight?” and Russell comes up with the brilliant answer: “Oasis.”

It actually surprises and triggers me how nearly every time Noel and Russell meet, they end up talking about that subject… really weird, innit? Does Russell know of something? We might never know… *suspense intensifies*

And, now, going out of the Russell Brand show, we have the beautiful quote of Noel for a German TV interview on February 2009, which I’ll give me the luxury to copy down here:

“Q: So tonight you’re on stage with your brother.

N: Unfortunately, yes.

Q: Unfortunately. You don’t like each other very much.

N: No.

Q: Is there anything you like about your brother? Anything?

N. There’s lots of things I like about his personality, but he doesn’t like me.

Q: Do you know why?

N: Uuuhm…

Q: Have you ever talked to him about it?

N: I don’t know. You’d have to speak to him. But I know he doesn’t like me. He insults me all the time.

Q: But you like him.

N: There’s certain aspects of him that I like.

Q: What kind of aspects?

N: He wears crazy shoes.

Q: Ah. Anything else?

N: He has crazy hair.

Q: And what’s that got to do with his personality?

N: They’re just things I find attractive in men.”

Fine.

6-) This.

Ok, now I have two destinations: either people will kill me or support me. I don’t want to, I don’t know, ruin Noel’s perfect-marriage-husband reputation or whatsoever; actually, I don’t want to ruin Noel’s marriage lolololol but the point is: it’s in the internet, so it’s free, right? And my job here is exposing. So, that’s what I’m gonna do.

Well, one day I was doing my daily research with my friends, seeking for evidences of Noel’s bisexuality, and I bumped up into this:

But then I thought, “c'mon, the guy (who I censored the username for legal reasons) could be tripping”, but then me and my big-stalker-KGB-ass did a research on the lad’s profile, and, in the same weekend he tweeted that, he really was at Glasto, in 2014:

And the point is that, Noel wasn’t playing Glastonbury then, but he ATTENDED Glastonbury; he was at backstage, as you can see here:

Maybe the guy is crazy? Yes! Do I think he is actually crazy? No! Simply because, as I said, I don’t doubt anything, I know Noel and his capacity. The only difference between Noel and Liam is that Noel is a perfect secrefreak.

7-) Oasis fans are noticing it

If you think I made up all this bullshit, think again. It’s more and more common you see, not only the more dedicated fan accounts talking about it, but more grown-up fans talking about it too – I mean: it’s common to see not only the fan girls talking of it, but 30 year old blokes talking too. So, something must be quite right in all of this, right?

That’s it, guys, thank you so much for reading, I really consider this post my ultimate masterpiece, so I hope you enjoyed it! Feel free to reblog, it helps me a lot, send a message or whatever, I’ll love to read it, see you on the next post!

#noel gallagher #gallaghercest #gcestlavie #evidence #80s

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songwritingtipsandtricks · 5 years ago

Link

Hey lads, here is the transcript for the second episode of the podcast.

Hello and welcome everyone out there listening to this program.

Thank you for tuning in once more for another episode on songwriting tips & tricks

Have you ever been searching for a better way to rephrase an idea, or maybe you've been looking for a word that fits the meter or beat or paints a more beautiful image in the audiences head? If that is the case, then today's episode will help you with just that.

Today's episode is dedicated to a powerful weapon that should be an essential tool in your songwriting. Of course, we are talking about synonyms.

What is a synonym? Or instead, what is the definition of the word synonym.

1 one of two or more words or expressions of the same language that have the same or nearly the same meaning in some or all senses

2 a word or phrase that by association is held to embody something (such as a concept or quality) a tyrant whose name has become a synonym for oppression

So close your eyes for a minute, or think back to the last song you have been working on. Are you there? Great. Now try to remember writing the lyrics and what you have been thinking about. Did you write the words straight from your mind? Did you contemplate the pictures and how you could clarify or rephrase it more colloquial? If you did, then you are already implementing this powerful tool. If not, don't worry, it is rather tedious work and may take a lot more time than your usual writing.

But how do we use a Thesaurus properly, and what is the intention behind it.

So in general, firstly we open our Thesaurus, may it be digitally or analogue. Then we search for a word we want to get a synonym for, so you search for the entry like you would in a dictionary, or you type it in a digital option. Let us simulate this for a second. So given we are looking for a sharper word for the rather common word heart. In the right context, that word could be compelling on its own, and maybe your style of writing could be based on an everyday style of speech. However, perhaps you want to re-illustrate the picture.

So we search for the entry heart in our Thesauruses. Type it in on MacMillan.And on the left, I have already searched for the word in the rather heavy book (which may be the significant disadvantage of an analogous one). And from here it is quite easy. When we have found the word, we have to think about the meaning we want it to convey. In this case, heart does not only stands for an organ in a body but has various meanings depending on the context. So in the internet version, in our case, the MacMillan dictionary, this is quite easy and well-organised. We search for the right meaning, and just beneath the definition of the word, there is a button for the Thesaurus. As easy as that. Then there is an array of general terms about the concept behind the word heart. So as some of you might know there is a theory in linguistics or language studies in general which is called the semiotic-triangle. This triangle tries to explain the cognitive work when we read, write or speak a word or vice versa. So when we think about a picture we want to convey may be the heart, in this case, we might immediately know the word in our native language. Still, if you are writing in your second language, it might take some more time. So the logic behind this triangle is that the word heart, of course, is just defined term in your language. At the same time, in another language, like in German, there is a different word for the concept behind this. Anyway, you get the point. A word is not bound to the picture. And of course, both the idea and the word are not the real thing.

And this is excellent news for us songwriters. This means that writing has seemingly endless possibilities for rephrasing and conveying pictures. So rephrasing is an essential and essential part of speech.

So let's get to work. We have found the Thesaurus online an see where the internet comes in handy, not only do we have it at hand at any location, but it is easy to handle. The offline version of this is not as fast as the online one. However, we might get more information and an interesting choice of words that are not available on some platforms and has a special sophisticated touch to it. But that depends on your choice of Thesaurus.

Now you might ask, where do you get neat synonyms and how can you use it in your songs?

Perhaps just have a look in a nearby library, book or antiquities shop or do a little online research for a suitable Thesaurus. For my taste, MacMillan, Merriam-Webster or the Oxford dictionary are reliable sources with high esteem. Analogous Thesauruses should also be adequately collected and published by a renowned publisher. If you are a student at a university, there may also be a table in the linguistics faculty giving away old books that and if you are lucky like I was with my Oxford Thesaurus, you get a tremendous Thesaurus for free. Having one at home comes in quite handy when you are writing.

So there is a little poem we are going to write together now. It intentionally is not sophistically well written nor rhyming, as we think about the synonyms to rhyme it with.

The pain I try to drown in bottles.

The hole it left me with alone

The broken heart lies down in pieces

You swept away so easily

So well, not much of a story, it is quite open and un-rhyming. However, some pictures could be coherently connected. So, we need to look for the nouns adjectives and adverbs, as they convey the most pictorial meaning.

The PAIN I TRY to DROWN in ALCOHOL.

The HOLE it LEFT ME with ALONE

The BROKEN HEART is DOWN in PIECES

YOU SWEPT away so EASILY

The nouns are the most critical conveyors in language, as they determine the verbs that follow it and also have specific attributes. So in order, we will look up nouns first, then think about the verbs and then have a look for the adjectives and adverbs. In this case, I will be using the MacMillan Thesaurus.

A suitable noun for pain would be agony or distress, I find as it paints a picture of great pain and is more specific.

Next up Alcohol, MacMillan does not have the word I am searching for, so I head over to Merriam-Webster. I like the bottle, as it is quite illustrative and fits the broken pieces in the next line.

Another word for HOLE would be crack, and I like this one as it has a delicate touch to it.

Heart, we had earlier, and a suitable word which is quite the contrary to the picture is virtue. And if the protagonist is a man, it leaves the impression of weakness and weariness. Let's try this once and change the to my as well as it is more personal. To my mind, I'm going to drop the is. We are also going to stick with pieces in this case as I cannot find a suitable word that is of my liking.

So this far we have got:

The distress I TRY to DROWN in bottles

The cracks it LEFT ME WITH alone

My broken virtue down in pieces

and you SWEPT AWAY so easily

The last line is mainly verbal and adverbial, so we're going to proceed with the verbs.

For verbs, I prefer Merriam-Webster, as there is a whole section between a noun synonym that find synonyms for the verb.

To try, we are going to trade in to strive, as it also has the same sound as try but has a more zealous feeling and in this context seems more vulnerable. Drown is left the same. The next line is also staying just as it is for now. The next line is without a verb, and the next line suits the picture of shattered glass and erasing all evidence.

So far, we have:

The distress I strive to drown in bottles.

The cracks it left me with alone.

My broken virtue down in pieces.

And you swept it away so easily.

So next up adjectives and adverbs.

The first line has none, the second one only has the alone. And the Thesaurus has on one's own as a suggestion. And thus I'm rephrasing the line to The cracks I'm left with on my own. The broken virtue could also be sinking to pieces as it gives an exciting connotation to the act of falling and cracking open. Perhaps a slow-motion memory or a submerged feeling of shock. The easily is quite dull and common, so the Thesaurus also suggests naturally. In this picture, I find it rather suitable, as he/she appears to be emotionally cold and perhaps a notorious heartbreaker. I'm adding a pronoun in the last line, and we are about done.

So eventually we end up with something like this:

The distress I strive to drown in bottles.

The cracks I'm left with on my own.

My broken virtue sunk to pieces.

And you swept it away so naturally.

Well, it is not a Shakespearean masterpiece. However, this is the first synopsis perhaps, from where we can continue with the next part of the story.

So for now, I think this is a great start. Maybe some of you want to try using my poem with your Thesaurus and start telling your own story from there. I'd be thrilled to hear some of your own interpretations that have different twists.

As you can see, you can find synonyms for nearly every word you might be searching for. Maybe you understand now, how powerful this tool can be. An interesting exercise is using a verse or chorus from one of your favourite songs and try rephrasing it. It opens up a whole world of opportunities, as suddenly there are so many words you can choose from. While pop-music today sometimes is somewhat stodgy in its choice of words, maybe you can go this extra mile to add appealing pictures to your lyrics.

So if you have a few minutes, look up your favourite song and rephrase a few lines from the song. If you like, just send me a message with your poem, and I read it out in the next episode.

Okay, just one more thing that pops up in my mind right now. I guess that most of you listen to music in the language you are using in songwriting as well. An inspiring approach to new inspiration or idea could be to use a song in a language that you are not writing in, in my case that would be German, roughly translate it and do the same thing we did earlier. You might come to entirely different ideas and pictures that lead to a number one hit while telling the same story with different words.

So thank you for listening to this episode. There is more to expect in the next month, and I am so thrilled to continue this program.

I want to leave you with a song recommendation today, and I am really inspired by the style of writing that is implemented. An artist I discovered a few weeks ago. Boy In Space, if you haven't heard of him, has heartbreaking lyrics that are so illustrative. His song Drown is a touching ballad and really well-written. So not only the song is really catchy and flawlessly performed, but the lyrics in themself carry a lot of meaning and fit the music so beautifully. He has recently been the opening act for Alec Benjamin, and his social media is really down to earth and fun to follow. Give it a listen and note down some pictures, rephrase his songs if you want to as well and happy songwriting.

So long I hope you enjoyed today's episode and stick around for another round next time. If you like the format, please feel free to support it by subscribing to it and marking it 5 stars. More tips are available on the Tumblr-blog on songwriting tips & tricks. I wish you all the best and see you next time.

We are about to discuss different reliable Thesauruses, be it digital or analogue, rephrase a sample poem and devise a scheme on how to rephrase a line. In the end, you'd be fully aware of using synonyms properly, finding new approaches to writing original lyrics and getting new ideas from rephrasing your favourite songs.

If you like the format, leave a quick review and subscribe to the show. If you know friends who are searching for a program just like this, just let them know as well. If you have any suggestions or feedback, leave it in the comments or send me a message on any social media platform.

Until the next episode, as always, happy songwriting.

Kieper

#songwriting #podcast #anchor #apple podcast #google podcast #songwriting tips #music #lyrics #writing #inspiration

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ivyquinnauthor · 5 years ago

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12, 17 and 25 for the ff writer asks please :)

Responding to the fanfic writer questions, if anyone else wants to ask some, feel free!

***12 - Who is your favorite character to write for?***

I guess since I’ve written pretty consistently in three fandoms so far, I’d list the ones that I liked the best for each or used to like. I mean, I was first in Buffy fandom so Spike. In Smallville---which I can’t write for anymore at all cause whoo boy all the scandals there turn my stomach----I liked Chloe Sullivan but again the real life terrible, literal cult stuff means I can’t do anything in that fandom anymore, and I haven’t written for that character in over 4 years. Such things happen. In Lucifer, I prefer Lucifer the most cause lots of just angst to mine but also sarcasm, lol.

************

***17) Post a line from a WIP you’re working on:***

Honestly, I have a few I spin plates for, keep up in the air, between two multi-chapter fics and a sort of interconnected series of one-shots. So, lines from the following:

A) From “Recurrence” -

As musicals go, he appreciated ones with a more intense difficulty level and, in that regard, The Music Man left much to be desired. Doing the quid pro quo to show the lads trying out for Harold Hill how it’s supposed to be done was far from a challenge---he much preferred being out with Ella in Vegas with some Lady Luck---but he muddled through the inferior song anyway. After all, trouble with a capital T is something he knew everything about.

B) From “This Ebony Bird Beguiling” -

He wasn’t sure how he got from playing helpful house guest, preparing sugary-laden treats for the urchin and the detective (when Chloe woke up, talk about a rough night) in a sunny beach house to giving Trixie Espinosa preening advice. Oh, don’t get him wrong. His interminable life had been nothing but bizarre, depending on whose perspective one took, but it usually didn’t vacillate between almost mind-numbingly boring and human one moment to worrying about someone else’s loose pin feathers the very next.

C) From “Queer Eye for the Chef Guy” (next Culinary Advice one-shot) -

“I agreed to this, sort of, because you clearly need a distraction while Linda works through the whole you’re-the-devil-thing.”

Lucifer narrowed his eyes at Gary. “You have a fine talent for making the infernal and, frankly, formerly---very formerly---divine sound mundane, Preston. It’s more than a just a ‘thing.’”

Oh Christ...wait shouldn’t even think it. He'd gotten the devil extra prickly already. “Fine then. You want a project, and I want to keep Ms. Smith happy and, by extension, both my arms intact, but does it have to involve my clothes?”

“These!” Lucifer said, holding up a pair of cargo pants littering the floor. “Cannot be labeled clothes. In fact, do you have lighter fluid? Never mind I can immolate anything...”

“You can what?” And he didn’t yip, not really. Okay, maybe a little.

“Well, what all do you think I can do?”

Gary pinched the bridge of his nose. If he’d known that, he’d have just dragged his rucksack to Lux. Let Lucifer accidentally set his own bloody flat on fire.

***

And just cause sometimes I keep notes on things to do one day if little scraps of things come to mind, a couple snippets from stuff that’s just ideas and files for now:

A) From “Hair of the Dog” -

He should send Miss Lopez home. Lucifer knew that the moment he spotted her arguing with Patrick in a very colorful and completely un-Ella-like mix of Spanish and English curses grumbling about being cut off. A good person would call her an Uber or even a private car---he could more than afford it---and send her home with a spare bottle of aspirin from under the bar to boot. Lux kept plenty of other first aid remedies around. After the hangover she was sure to have in the morning, Miss Lopez would even thank him for such chivalry.

Except Lucifer was not a good person.

Just a week ago, after the worst moment of his long suffering life, the detective had more than established that to her, he was not a person at all. And it was perversely impressive that in literally billions of years of existence, including permanent exile from his entire (mostly rubbish) family and burning for millennia in a lake of fire, that the detective yelling about being terrified of him would be the worst, but it was. So, no, Lucifer was not a good person or even pretending to be one right now. And he was well and truly soused for once after a steady effort at not only drinking every handle in his personal bar and half of Lux’s but also from downing more than his fair share---celestial metabolism or not---of some molly from the last party he hosted in the penthouse.

He was probably for a precious hour longer even less clear-headed than Miss Lopez. So when he pulled her away from the bar and smoothed things over with Patrick, he couldn’t quite make himself send her away, especially after she curled into his side. He definitely couldn’t refuse her suggestion to go up to the penthouse either...

B) From “What to Expect When You’re an Expecting Devil” -

“No.”

He arched an eyebrow back at his therapist, who, to be fair, was also his former lover (and before things got utterly complicated and pear-shaped, he’d still have kept up that arrangement with her; she was that good as he found the uptight ones tended to be when they got a chance to let loose), currently the mother-to-be of his first ever nephew, and the only other person in history that he or Amenadiel knew about who was also dealing with a celestial pregnancy. Which sodding perfect. However, just because they were all kinds of enmeshed and, eventually, would be family and boy had his brother cocked that all up (literally), it didn’t mean he had to always listen to her.

If his track record was anything to go by, he rarely did.

Still, Linda kept her hand held out till he relinquished the handle and then coughed at him till he yielded the tumbler too. There were demons he’d beheaded in Hell for far less insolence. Sad state of affairs he’d reached where a wisp of a thing who couldn’t even hope to come up to his chest got him to acquiesce with merely her glare.

“First of all, if this is even...whatever Remiel thinks she senses and it’s assuredly not that because Dad likes his jokes but that’s...” He stuttered a bit there. “I am not that. Even if I were, I don’t think drinking would hurt the little larva and, maybe if it did, bully for everyone. Surely, by now you’re at least passingly familiar with Revelation?”

Linda’s glare hardened, and she gestured to the bar. “Don’t even. I’m not drinking with an angel-baby cause who even knows and you’re not going to...”

“With the antichrist?”He bit back, tone cutting, but the fight leaking from him. “If Remiel is right---and let’s all just hope she’s not because her spider sense is busted---I’m going to need to a drink or all of them worse than ever now.”

“No, Lucifer. Not self destruction for one or, well, both of you that way.”

He pursed his lips but grabbed a bottle of water from behind the penthouse’s bar instead. “Fine then. I suppose that’s the price of you being the only doctor I know who can help me out on the other end of things, you know, if Remy’s not just cracked.”

Linda blanched. “Nope not doing. First, there’s such a thing as too much family togetherness but also I’m not even close to that kind of doctor and it’s been three decades since medical school. Add in that...” she paused then, fumbling for the politic way to phrase something, he was sure.

“Right, like I said, the antichrist. Maybe. I don’t rightly know, John was very stoned when he wrote all that down. Psychadelic nightmare fuel and all that. So, then, I just go it alone, again, assuming Remy’s right?” His hand strayed to his hip because, honestly, self preserving powers of denial aside, even he knew something was really different about him these last two months.

And it shouldn’t intimidate him to have Linda waddle over to him with her eyes narrowed and, if anyone but Amenadiel ever asked him, it didn’t. Not really.

She sighed and bit her lower lip. “Okay, so not an optimal idea, but I have a friend from my residency and his son’s really talented just tends to fuck up...I mean he has his license but if you pay enough....no questions asked so that was what I was thinking?”

“Question or a statement, love?”

“Little of both, but I’m sure no booze is good booze till seven months from now.”

Lucifer drained his water. “Well, and I thought I knew something about Hell. Clearly, I was wrong.”

*******

***25) Have you ever cried writing a story?***

Yes, I have. Back when I still wrote Smallville, I have a very dark trilogy of stories called the Lara-verse. When writing two parts of that series, Black as Sackcloth and Of Wolves and Lambs, I cried because the first involved some fairly gruesome and distressing lead character deaths and because the second dealt a lot with dissociation and PTSD. Honestly, I never finished the series with the four installment because it was such a weird, hard headspace to be in that I just didn’t have the strength to go back to it. It’s on my livejournal here if anyone reads Smallville - https://legendarytobes.livejournal.com/?skip=30&tag=lara%20verse - people would have to friend me there to read, but if anyone’s that curious, feel free to.

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fyrapartnersearch · 6 years ago

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Seeking Literate and Dedicated Partners!

Hello, you can call me Doe! I'm in my 20s, a student, and a proud cat mom. I write multiple paragraphs/novella style (200-500+ words). I love to write detailed descriptions and delve into a character’s head/emotions as well as surroundings. I compare it to writing a novel together. I understand if the scene doesn’t have alot going on and therefore requires less like rapid fire. I adore having long, thoughtful replies where we truly immerse ourselves in the world. I'm hoping to find a partner whose as enthusiastic and passionate about the plot and writing as I am. When I get invested in a story, it’s 100% dedication. Getting a reply is the highlight of my day. I'm a big fan of romance and using face claims. I’m the type to make pinterest boards, spam you with gifs, headcanons, and send you songs that remind me of our characters and/or ship. I'll get excited if we come up with a great plot idea or if our characters are being cute or going to get into trouble. I live for this kind of stuff honestly. Last but not least I only do MxF and don’t double, but I’m more than happy to write side characters of either gender to help move the story along. I'd prefer female authors writing male characters but male writers are fine too. Desperately Searching For - 21+ partners - For you to have an excellent grasp of grammar, punctuation, spelling, and capitalization. Both in character and out of character. (Literate to advanced writers only, please. I'm not looking for newbies). - Plot before smut. While mature themes will be in my plots, and are even encouraged, there needs to be a good chemistry between our characters. I like to have a good mix of plot and tastefully written smut, along with doses of angst and fluff. - For you to write as an older male (Late 30s-40+). I'm a sucker for the gruff and tough men who secretly have a soft heart. I also love those grumpy, hypermasculine men being intimidated by darling, soft yet commanding, and pretty women. - The more description, the better! I'm looking for someone can write as much as me (2 to 4 paragraphs or more) and really bring the story to life. I lose interest if I'm the only one that's invested/enthusiastic or coming up with plot ideas. Quality writing makes my heart happy, as does world building together. - The use of real life face claims and joining me in the wonderful world of ship/character development isn't a requirement but I'd sure be delighted if we were on the same page in this regard. (I won't use anime faces, only art if you're uncomfortable with real life) - Someone who won't leave without warning or explanation after sending the first post. I'm looking for the long term here, and I have been greatly saddened by how many partners have left me high and dry recently. If you've made it this far, thank you! You won't be disappointed in writing with me. I tend to be online daily and I'd like it if you were too. Please let me know if you're going to be inactive, long days/weeks of silence make me nervous. Below are genres and pairings I love. Feel free to combine two or more and I’m sure we can come up with something great! Genres: - anything mafia related - crimes in remote locations - small towns and supernatural happenings - post apocalyptic/dystopia - supernatural/modern fantasy (werewolves, shapeshifters, a/b/o dynamic and everything that comes with it, monster x hunter) - southern/mid western/gothic - murder mystery (small town or big city) - western inspired/weird west (supernatural and fantasy elements) - modern/dark fairy tale retellings - sci-fi/cyberpunk - little coastal towns or little towns in the mountains - emotionally charged/dark and gritty - superpowers/gifted - unresolved sexual tension/slow burn - mythology (modern / hades x persephone) - redemption - action - fake dating - pacific northwest - suburban gothic Pairings: - age gaps (older man x younger woman) - enemies to lovers - cop x criminal - doctor x patient - friends turned lovers/pining - grumpy x sunshine - the broken man x the woman that becomes his light - fbi agents/cop partners - dark hearted man melting for the innocent woman - reunited old lovers and/or friends - boss x employee - neighbors - firefighter/cop x victim - mentor x mentee - spies - hurt/comfort - height differences - pet names - lady and the tramp esque - creature x human (I'm always up for NSFW things while in their beast form.) - ex-con x anyone - detective x witness - detective x suspect - person in witness protection x anyone - bodyguard x assignment - widow/er falling in love again - outlaw x schoolteacher - biker x doctor - biker x civilian - rancher/trapper/mountain man x city girl - interracial relationships Tropes: the papa wolf (craving), badass baritone, cultured badass, jerk with a heart of gold. ladykiller in love, mountain man, mysterious protector, southern gentleman, tall, dark, and handsome, gentleman criminal Plot Ideas: (these are just suggestions and if you have other ideas I'd like to hear them) 1. age gap + height difference + modern supernatural + werewolf x human + dark hearted man melting for the innocent woman A mentor x mentee pairing where the mentee has been a victim of some sorts and that's why they’re taken under the wing of the mentor. I'm picturing a guy capable of towering over most men and also knocking most men out, but with a soft spot (that takes a bit to uncover) for his mentee. He's a retired hitman, but such profession is nothing you can retire from. He's living out in a small town, keeping to himself and being the local town grump. Something happens to her, something horrible that makes her want to do something even though she is normally the sunshine in everyone's life, and through contacts she is given the address to a man who can teach her. (more to the plot available upon request) 2. age gap + spy x spy + modern supernatural + werewolf x coyote shapeshifter He has already been secretly hired by the US government to investigate this mysterious, new criminal organization. It would be at her first mission and already aware she will be working alongside a more experienced, freelancer agent. We could start with them meeting at the airport and we can go from there. 3. Muse A is a infamous criminal and Muse B is a FBI agent. Muse B has been helping Muse A take out their competition. They could kill each other but would die for each other. (Based on The Blacklist) Fandoms: (Will only do oc x oc/characters inspired by canon pairings) Star Wars, X Files, Haven, The Blacklist, Fringe, Zoo, Stranger Things, Heroes, The Wolf Among Us, The Walking Dead, Mercy Thompson Series, True Blood, Stephen King's Universes, Red Dead Redemption, Marvel (Last but not least, I have a list of kinks if anyone's interested) I use email and discord to write. Contact me at [email protected] or Doe#4017. If you add me using the latter, let me know where you came from. Please be detailed when you message me, let me know why you chose to contact me. Seeing "hey do you wanna rp?" is a guaranteed way to turn me off. Look forward to hearing from you!

#oc rp #multiple paragraph #long term #email #forum #messenger #submission

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thesoftdumbass · 6 years ago

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Yallneedtrek’s Writing Anniversary Challenge

Hi you guys! So, I’ve been wanting to host a writing challenge for a while, and now seems like a good time to do so. November 30th marks the 2 year anniversary of when I started posting my fanfiction, starting out with a whopping 649 words on this Charles Xavier fic. Things have changed since then, I’ve written a lot more and joined a few fandoms since then, made some friends, and all in all enjoyed my time here on tumblr.

So if anybody would like to join my writing challenge, here are some things to remember while entering/posting:

~To enter the writing challenge, you must send me an ASK with a character or ship, and AU, AND a prompt from the lists below. (If you send anonymously or have multiple blogs, make sure that I know which blog you will be posting on)

~All entries are due by November 30th, 2018. There is no cut-off date to enter the challenge, as long as you think you can finish, you can enter whenever. (I will post occasional reminders and tag everybody who signed up!)

~Characters/ships can be used multiple times, as can AUs, but prompts can only be used once.

~If there’s a character/ship not on the list but that belongs in my fandoms, you can message me if you’d like to write for them and get my okay!

~You can use any writing genre: fluff, smut, angst, whatever. I would prefer angst-y fics to end happily, though!

~Important! When posting, please include Warnings, Word Count, and a Summary. Also, add a “Read More” if your fic is over 400 words so we don’t clog up everybody’s dash!

~When posting your fic, tag my blog and use the tag #yallneedtrekwritingchallenge, and send the post to me directly to make sure that I’ve seen it. I will reblog all of the fics and add them all to a masterlist to be shared when all entries are posted!

Have fun writing, lovelies!

Characters and Ships - Choose one:

Star Trek-

Jim Kirk

McKirk

Montgomery “Scotty” Scott

Spock

Pavel Chekov

Wonder Woman-

Steve Trevor

WonderTrev

Avengers-

Steve Rogers

Stucky

Bucky Barnes

Sam Wilson

Loki Odinson

Thor Odinson

Urban boys-

Leonard “Bones” McCoy

Gavin Magary

Siberius Vaako

Black Hat

Eomer

John Kennex

Any Karl Urban character, really

Other-

Dean Winchester

Sam Winchester

Lance Tucker

Carter Baizen

Wynonna Earp

Doc Holliday

AU’s - Choose one:

Soulmate

Firefighter

Royal

Fake dating / fake married

Supernatural (any supernatural creature/phenomenon)

Neighbors

University / Fellow Professors

Artist

Flower Shop

Vikings

Called / texted the wrong number

Body Swap

Bartender

Motorcycle Club

Roadtrip

Book Shop / Library

Office

Coffee Shop

Arranged Marriage

Roommate

Writing Prompts - Choose one:

1. “But I’m not wearing pants”

2. “Why were you in a dumpster?”

3. “Just give me the ____ and nobody gets hurt”

4. “Lick me all you want, I’m not moving my hand”

5. “I did not kidnap you! I anything, I adult-snatched you.”

6. “Didn’t you ever stop and think that there’s a reason I’m here?”

7. “Next time you come in my room to scare me, try picking a better hiding spot than behind the curtains.”

8. “What do you suggest we do?”

9. “Are you okay? I’ve never seen you turn down food.”

10. “Are those my underwear?”

11. “Will you just stop talking?” “Make me.”

12. “Did you just make a joke?”

13. “And you say I’m the dramatic one”

14. “Don’t get your hopes up”

15. “Subtlety is not your strong suit”

16. “My mind does not immediately jump to murder. Oh who am I kidding, of course it does!”

17. “Do you smell something burning?”

18. “No you are not Batman, stop saying that!”

19. “If you don’t stop talking in song quotes, I swear I will end you”

20. “Who ever said that I hate you?”

21. “Who thought it was a good idea to give (him/her/them) coffee?”

22. “What is that incessant beeping?”

23. “Here, take my jacket”

24. “Say hello to your cat for me”

25. “Who are you talking to?”

26. “Stay, please”

27. “Are you dead?” “Yes.”

28. “Next time you need help, don’t come to me”

29. “Can anybody tell me why my house is on fire?!”

30. “Are you crying?” “No! Shut up.”

31. “Stop screaming, it’s just me.”

32. “Jealous is not a good look on you”

33. “Is my leg supposed to bend that way?”

34. “I would rather be stuck on a deserted island with literally anybody but you”

35. “If you get ‘Let it Go’ stuck in my head one more time, I will never speak to you again.”

36. “I am too tired to deal with your happy disposition today”

37. “That line was so cheesy, it hurts.”

38. “Can you not be sarcastic just for once?”

39. “I told you this was a bad idea”

40. “Do not throw up on me”

41. “I’m just gonna keep talking until you smile”

42. “If you’re trying to seduce me, I would reconsider.”

43. “Can I kiss you?”

44. “I must be going crazy”

45. “Do I spy a tattoo?”

46. “Am I turning into a vampire?”

47. “No, you cannot borrow my laptop! You remember what happened the last time.”

48. “Just hug me before I put someone’s head through a wall.”

49. “If you can’t tell, I am very angry.”

50. “Are those little unicorns on your boxers?”

51. “You dropped something”

52. “You must be new here”

53. “Can we watch movies and cuddle?”

54. “I love you, I hope you know that.”

55. “I need you to stop laughing and come help me”

56. “Next time, I pick the music.”

57. “Can I kill (them)?”

58. “If you can go one hour without talking, I will kiss you”

59. “Stop saying that”

60. “You’re ridiculous”

61. “I’d hate to ruin such a sweet moment, but we have to go.”

62. “Oh, I almost forgot you were here”

63. “Is it true what they say?”

64. “Is that what I think it is?”

65. “You’ve got no sense of self-preservation”

66. “You’re worrying me”

67. “Get away from me”

68. “Don’t say that”

69. “Sometimes I wish I never met you”

70. “Can you stop poking me?”

71. “Don’t tell me to calm down, you’re covered in blood!”

72. “Will you tell me a story?”

73. “There might be a small…large…dent in your car, but please don’t kill me, I can explain!”

74. “I just want to drink chocolate milk and take a nap.” “You are a grown adult.”

75. “Are you drunk?”

76. “It looks like there was a train wreck in here”

77. “You lost the bet, you know what that means”

78. “I shouldn’t be here.” “Then why are you?”

79. “I’m not going with you dressed like that”

80. “Who else is going to save you from yourself?”

81. “What kind of name is that?”

82. “That is a lot of- what even is that?”

83. “That doesn’t look like fun, it looks like a death trap”

84. “So this is what betrayal looks like”

85. “Who started the food fight?”

86. “What, my poetry isn’t good enough for you?” “You just recited Dr. Seuss.”

87. “I’ve been shot!” “Relax, it’s just a nerf bullet.”

88. “You’re trying too hard, you need to just relax.”

89. “You look like the poster-child for bad decisions”

90. “Could you be any more oblivious?”

91. “Shut your whore mouth”

92. “Say that to my face, you soggy piece of pizza”

93. “You are such a moldy shower curtain”

I really hope you guys have fun writing, and I’m looking forward to reading all of your amazing fics! If you have any questions, feel free to message me or send an ask. Love you all!

I’m adding everyone on my tag list and Urban Shitposting group just in case you want to join or signal boost!

@deanxfuckingadorablexwinchester @mad-girl-without-a-box @cd1242 @space-helen @izzy10718 @feelmyroarrrr @bookcaseninja @musikat18 @kickingitwithkirk @auduna-druitt @garnet-redtailedhero @bubblegum-star-trek @reading-in-moonlight @cuddlememerrick @loststarlight @fireboltrose7559 @lauuerodz @bkwrm523 @fearofdeathkeepsusalive @goingknowherewastaken @annathewitch @outside-the-government @queenmismatched @thefanficfaerie

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kae-karo · 6 years ago

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dan and phil tag

oh god @lilacskylester hi b you tagged me in this literally ages ago i’m just a mess lately lmao but! bc i know i’ve seen some people asking some things mentioned here so enjoy! i’ll put everything below the cut

What made you subscribe to Phil? Dan? they’re just fun, i mean i’ve talked endlessly about their dynamic and why i love them (why we love dan, why we love phil) and i don’t think it was any single thing that made me sub to them both, just....all the things

How or when did you discover Phil? Dan? i found dan first back in july of 2017 bc i saw a pic/gif of dnp on my dash (and i’ve tried desperately to locate the exact one but i Cannot find it, i think it was from a liveshow maybe?) and i’d been well into thomas sanders at the time so i was like ‘cool more youtubers’ so i watched dan’s 5 drunk people vid (i think i literally just typed danisnotonfire or dan howell into the yt search and that was the first one that came up) and i liked it? so i subbed? i was a dannie for a while (like a week lmao) before i figured out phil was in a bunch of stuff too, binged and subbed to the gaming channel next, then did the same with phil’s channel a bit later

Does Phil have a particular mannerism you find endearing? Dan? phil hmm i think his tendency to be touchy is adorable? like

as for dan, i love him being a dramatic boye

Favorite Dan Video: hands down trying to live my truth (x) it’s just so honest and open and still so well-edited and like. it reminded me of his liveshows which i adore

Favorite Phil Video: i love the honesty of why i changed my emo hair (x) it’s just really refreshing and open, which we haven’t gotten as much of from phil until recently

Favorite Gaming Video: some days i’m just like ‘literally every vid they put out is better than the last’ but i think i’ve mentioned this before (x) but my all-time fave, if i had to pic one, would probs be the yasuhati singing challenge it just gets me every time (x)

Favorite Dan Photo:

Favorite Phil Photo: (it’s not technically a photo but it counts)

Favorite Dan and Phil Photo:

Favorite Dan Instagram Story:

tied with

youtube

Favorite Phil Instagram Story:

youtube

tied with the failed selfie (x) which it’s being rude and not letting me add so have a pic

Favorite Dan Tweet: i wonder how biology can explain the physical pain you feel in your chest when all you want to do is be with someone D:

Favorite Phil Tweet: ahappyphil

Favorite Dan Live (ie-Live Show, Live Stream, Radio 1) Moment:

youtube

tied with

youtube

Favorite Phil Live (ie-Live Show, Live Stream, Radio 1) Moment:

youtube

Favorite Dan and Phil Live (ie-Live Show, Live Shows, Radio 1) Moment:

Favorite Fan Artist: oof @dyxnamic-art or @incaseyouart although i follow plenty of lovely artists!

Favorite Fanfiction Author: @waveydnp @jilliancares @leblonde @danfanciesphil are always consistent faves, but there are so so so many incredible authors out there!!

Favorite Fanfiction Story: i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again until my lungs stop working, but i adore a match and a fuse by @waveydnp (x)

Who should Dan collaborate with next? Phil? Together? i would love to see dan collab with someone to talk more abt mental health or depression or gender roles or literally anything that he talks abt in his liveshows that he doesn’t necessarily make vids abt. i’d love to see phil collab with pj again??? i want smth dark and strange and a little reminiscent of early ap on pj’s channel then smth light and fun and quirky on phil’s. for them both, i want a dnp collab with martyn and cornelia cough truth bombs cough

What should Dan’s next merch include? Phil? Together? @ dan we were promised asymmetrical tops or wide-neck stuff i want it all? i think dan has an incredible mind for fashion and i’d love to see what he would create if he stopped thinking of it as merch. from phil i am here for the pastel, i think i’d like to see him do something with denim? denim jackets? from them both, i honestly don’t care all that much, but i prefer clothes to like. kitschy stuff. i saw a post floating around abt dnp making pajama pants and i would be here for it???

What song best describes Dan? love myself by blake mcgrath (x) “i don’t wanna be perfect, just tryna be honest”

What song best describes Phil? rip i’d have to say i lived by onerepublic (x) it’s been ingrained into my brain at this point (x)

What song best describes their relationship? hah well funny enough we’ve been curating an entire phan playlist (x) (also feel free to send ur suggestions!) but if i had to pick like. a single song. it’d be say you won’t let go by james arthur (x)

What should their next baking video be? for some reason ‘a pie’ came to mind like idk any pie or maybe them trying to replicate mince pie recipes or smth would be funny. either that or maybe smth complex? idk i’m not well into baking so idk what all would be interesting to watch. i’ve also suggested and had suggested to me a baking vid with kath, which i would be so into

And to finish, If you could tell them one thing:

@ dan: you are appreciated, and we’re so incredibly proud of you for working on finding yourself and trying to be who you are. you deserve happiness, don’t ever tell yourself you don’t

@ phil: you are so incredibly respected and intelligent and one of the most creative minds out there, don’t ever sell yourself short or feel like you have to tone yourself down

@ dnp: the world is a better place for having you both in it

and ofc if any of y’all have been around long enough to remember when i actually did ask games, i don’t tag people but! if you see this and want to do it yourself, consider this me tagging you!

#dnp #dan and phil #phan #dip and pip #dan and phil tag #dnp gifs #dnp insta stories #my faves #hope y'all enjoy #kt

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roleplaypartneragency · 6 years ago

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Seeking Literate, Active, and Dedicated Partners

Hello, you can call me Doe! I’m in my 20s, a student, and a proud cat mom. I write multiple paragraphs/novella style (200-500+ words). I love to write detailed descriptions and delve into a character’s head/emotions as well as surroundings. I compare it to writing a novel together. I understand if the scene doesn’t have alot going on and therefore requires less like rapid fire. I adore having long, thoughtful replies where we truly immerse ourselves in the world. I’m hoping to find a partner whose as enthusiastic and passionate about the plot and writing as I am. When I get invested in a story, it’s 100% dedication. Getting a reply is the highlight of my day. I’m a big fan of romance and using face claims. I’m the type to make pinterest boards, spam you with gifs, headcanons, and send you songs that remind me of our characters and/or ship. I’ll get excited if we come up with a great plot idea or if our characters are being cute or going to get into trouble. I live for this kind of stuff honestly. Last but not least I only do MxF and don’t double, but I’m more than happy to write side characters of either gender to help move the story along. I’d prefer female authors writing male characters but male writers are fine too. Desperately Searching For - 21+ partners - For you to have an excellent grasp of grammar, punctuation, spelling, and capitalization. Both in character and out of character. (Literate to advanced writers only, please. I’m not looking for newbies). - Plot before smut. While mature themes will be in my plots, and are even encouraged, there needs to be a good chemistry between our characters. I like to have a good mix of plot and tastefully written smut, along with doses of angst and fluff. - For you to write as an older male (Late 30s-40+). I’m a sucker for the gruff and tough men who secretly have a soft heart. I also love those grumpy, hypermasculine men being intimidated by darling, soft yet commanding, and pretty women. - The more description, the better! I’m looking for someone can write as much as me (2 to 4 paragraphs or more) and really bring the story to life. I lose interest if I’m the only one that’s invested/enthusiastic or coming up with plot ideas. Quality writing makes my heart happy, as does world building together. - The use of real life face claims and joining me in the wonderful world of ship/character development isn’t a requirement but I’d sure be delighted if we were on the same page in this regard. (I won’t use anime faces, only art if you’re uncomfortable with real life) - Someone who won’t leave without warning or explanation after sending the first post. I’m looking for the long term here, and I have been greatly saddened by how many partners have left me high and dry recently. If you’ve made it this far, thank you! You won’t be disappointed in writing with me. I tend to be online daily and I’d like it if you were too. Please let me know if you’re going to be inactive, long days/weeks of silence make me nervous. Below are genres and pairings I love. Feel free to combine two or more and I’m sure we can come up with something great! Genres: - anything mafia related - crimes in remote locations - small towns and supernatural happenings - post apocalyptic/dystopia - supernatural/modern fantasy (werewolves, shapeshifters, a/b/o dynamic and everything that comes with it, monster x hunter) - southern/mid western/gothic - murder mystery (small town or big city) - western inspired - modern/dark fairy tale retellings - sci-fi/cyberpunk - little coastal towns or little towns in the mountains - emotionally charged/dark and gritty - superpowers/gifted - unresolved sexual tension/slow burn - mythology (modern / hades x persephone) - redemption - action - fake dating - pacific northwest - suburban gothic Pairings: - age gaps (older man x younger woman) - enemies to lovers - cop x criminal - doctor x patient - friends turned lovers/pining - grumpy x sunshine - the broken man x the woman that becomes his light - fbi agents/cop partners - dark hearted man melting for the innocent woman - reunited old lovers and/or friends - boss x employee - neighbors - firefighter/cop x victim - mentor x mentee - spies - hurt/comfort - height differences - pet names - lady and the tramp esque - creature x human (I’m seeking werewolf/werelion humanoids in some cases and am always up for NSFW things while in their beast form) - ex-con x anyone - detective x witness - detective x suspect - person in witness protection x anyone - bodyguard x assignment - widow/er falling in love again Tropes: the papa wolf (craving), badass baritone, cultured badass, jerk with a heart of gold. ladykiller in love, mountain man, mysterious protector, southern gentleman, tall, dark, and handsome, gentleman criminal Plot Ideas: (these are just suggestions and if you have other ideas I’d like to hear them) 1. age gap + height difference + modern supernatural + werewolf x human + dark hearted man melting for the innocent woman A mentor x mentee pairing where the mentee has been a victim of some sorts and that’s why they’re taken under the wing of the mentor. I’m picturing a guy capable of towering over most men and also knocking most men out, but with a soft spot (that takes a bit to uncover) for his mentee. He’s a retired hitman, but such profession is nothing you can retire from. He’s living out in a small town, keeping to himself and being the local town grump. Something happens to her, something horrible that makes her want to do something even though she is normally the sunshine in everyone’s life, and through contacts she is given the address to a man who can teach her. (more to the plot available upon request) 2. age gap + spy x spy + modern supernatural + werewolf x coyote shapeshifter He has already been secretly hired by the US government to investigate this mysterious, new criminal organization. It would be at her first mission and already aware she will be working alongside a more experienced, freelancer agent. We could start with them meeting at the airport and we can go from there. 3. Muse A is a infamous criminal and Muse B is a FBI agent. Muse B has been helping Muse A take out their competition. They could kill each other but would die for each other. (Based on The Blacklist) 4. werewolf x dog shifter + age gap + unresolved sexual tension + cop x criminal A local man is accused of a murder he didn’t commit. (when actually someone or something else did and everyone assumes he was guilty because he was already a criminal before). A deputy believes in his innocence and aids him in his quest, to find the real killer. They fall in love along the way, a bond formed due to them both being outsiders in one way or another. Fandoms: (Will only do oc x oc/characters inspired by canon pairings) Star Wars, X Files, Haven, The Blacklist, Fringe, Zoo, Stranger Things, Heroes, The Wolf Among Us, The Walking Dead, Mercy Thompson Series, True Blood, Stephen King’s Universes, Red Dead Redemption, Marvel (Last but not least, I have a list of kinks if anyone’s interested) I use email and discord to write. Contact me at [email protected] or Doe#4017. If you add me using the latter, let me know where you came from. Look forward to hearing from you!

#fandom:starwars #fandom:thexfiles #fandom:haven #fandom:theblacklist #fandom:fringe #fandom:zoo #fandom:strangerthings #fandom:heroes #fandom:thewolfamongus #fandom:thewalkingdeadtv #fandom:mercythompsonseries #fandom:trueblood #fandom:stevenkingmultiverse #fandom:reddeadredemption #fandom:marvelmcu #platform:email #platform:discord #language:english #submission

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tomsgreg · 7 years ago

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But She’s a Cheerleader

Summary: Eddie Kaspbrak is a senior in high school with a lot of promise in his future. He has the “perfect” girl, good grades, and a few good friends. Sure he isn’t the most popular kid in school, but he’s happy. All of that changes though when his mother, friends, even his own girlfriend think he’s gay. All because he wants to be a cheerleader. When he arrives he meets a bunch of interesting characters, the most interesting being Richie Tozier, a complete trashmouth who unlike the rest, doesn’t want to fix what’s clearly wrong with him. Based on the film “But I’m a Cheerleader"

Ships: Reddie, and some side Stenbrough later

Author’s Notes: AHHHH! I’m so excited about this fic you don’t even know. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I do! Feel free to send me stuff/asks/whatever about this because I’d love to talk about it! Also: If you wanna be added to the tag list, either message me or shoot me an ask! I’m happy to add anyone!

Link to AO3

Eddie sat in the bleachers as his girlfriend was wrapping up her cheerleading practice. He heard the head cheerleader say something about donuts and being at the school at 7:30 Saturday morning to head to the football playoffs upstate. Eddie never really understood the appeal of football at all. Or why anyone would be so dedicated to cheering on the players. However, something always fascinated Eddie about cheerleading as a sport. Maybe it was the fun beats, or maybe it’s because it was a sport that was invented just to make people feel good; nothing more nothing less. Something about that concept always made Eddie want to try cheerleading, which he’s brought up to his girlfriend in passing. Just to see what she’d say “I would love to have you on the team Eddie bear, but this is Derry, and Derry wouldn’t be as supportive as me” Needless to say, his excuse that he wants to look at pretty girls in short skirts got him the silent treatment for nearly a week. She was right though, Derry wasn’t exactly a progressive town to live in, and given that Eddie was never the most masculine of men anyway, cheerleading would only make the already present rumors worse. I’m not gay though, Eddie thought to himself. So why should it matter? He was pulled out of his thoughts by Jenna tugging on his wrist

“Hey, Eddie bear!” She exclaimed, hardly sweaty from the hour-long practice. “Hey, babe. How was practice?” He said, grabbing onto the small of her back, pulling her close and placing a gentle kiss on the forehead. “It went fine.” she pulled herself away from him and walked beside him to his car.

“Can you believe it? First time in 27 years that Derry High is making it to the state championships!” “Eh, you know I don’t really care about that kind of stuff.” “Awh Eddie, no fun. So what pray tell will you be doing Saturday instead of being normal?” I am normal. Why does everyone think otherwise? He laughed it off, “Oh you know. Just the usual, homework, work. Stressing over college.” She pouted, “Awh, you’re stressed? I have the perfect solution.”

She tapped his nose and pulled him by the arm through the parking lot before making him unlock the car doors. Once the two of them were in the front seat of the old convertible, Jenna had attached her lips to his. It was wet, slobbery and nothing about it made Eddie want to kiss back. In fact, all he wanted to do was to pull away. He turned his face away from hers. “Jen, I-I need to get home for dinner.” “You can’t stay here with me for a little bit? Not even five minutes?” She may be a horrendous kisser, but he really didn’t like seeing her upset. She was a decent enough girl. He supposed he loved her. If love meant preferring to see them happy just so you didn’t have to deal with them being angry,

“I mean I guess I could…” She let out a suggestive chuckle before reattaching her lips to his. He couldn’t help but think if this is how other girls kissed their boyfriends, or more if this is how most guys kissed their girlfriends. His friends said they thought kissing their girlfriends was hot. She had to be doing something wrong for him to hate it so much. He thinks back to the football captain, Mike Hanlon and how happy he is when he kisses his girlfriend. He thought about how it was gentle and it was almost as if they were one, in sync. What must it be like to kiss him? That’s Normal. Everyone wonders these things, right? Eddie thought to himself, that’s all it was after all. Curiosity. Jenna moved her lips from his mouth to his jaw line and that’s where he drew the line. Pulling away from her kisses. “Jen. I-I really should get home” “Fine.” She rolled her eyes and pulled away from him, placing herself as far away from him as she could get in the small car. He sighed and created even more of a distance between the two before turning the keys in the ignition. —– Eddie sat at the dinner table as his mother prepared his plate, putting a huge chicken breast on his plate along with the vegetables already on his plate. “Eddie, you need to eat meat. You’re fragile enough already. Please?” She pleaded as she did at every meal. Eddie pushed the meat away from the rest of the food on the plate, grimacing at the oils it left behind in the spot it once was, “Ma, I tell you every night. I’m fine.” “Eddie, please. You’re wasting food.” Eddie shrugged his shoulders and dug into his serving of mashed potatoes. “I don’t know what happened to my sweet Eddie. You won’t take your pills anymore, and now this. One day you’ll be sorry that you didn’t listen to me.” He shrugged again and continued eating his dinner. They had this discussion almost every night, one would think she’d give up by now, but if anything she got more persistent. Serving up fewer vegetables at every dinner trying to force him into eating what was on his plate, whether he liked it or not. At this point, he was shocked she hadn’t stopped serving them all together. He quickly ate his dinner, anxious to get up to his room and avoid his overbearing mother. —– Eddie’s entire day was strange. It all started when his alarm went off to get up for school, as usual; and his mother came in to check if he was awake, as usual. “You up Eddie?” She asked, sounding off in a way that Eddie couldn’t quite place. He just knew he had a bad feeling about it. “Yea mom. I’m up.” He said, rolling out of bed slowly and turning off his alarm. “Okay. I’ll be downstairs if you need anything.” “Okay, ma.” She turned away and closed the door behind her, something she’s never done before today. Eddie thought nothing of it, maybe his mother was finally learning the word privacy. He should be grateful if anything. He threw on an oversized school sweater that had the words ‘GO RAIDERS!’ printed onto the front along with the cleanest pair of jeans he could find on the floor of his messy room and he brushed his curls into something manageable before heading downstairs. “Hey, mommy” he went up behind her and kissed her cheek before quickly grabbing his lunch and heading out the door. Mrs. Kaspbrak watched him go, hoping she was making the right choice. He put his book bag and lunch in the back seat of his car and got into the driver’s seat, turning the keys in the ignition and driving to Jen’s house to pick her up from her house. When the car started, so did his radio. Some song he put on a playlist for Jen a while back started playing. It wasn’t even a real song per se, it’s from that old Adam Sandler movie Jen always made him watch, The Wedding Singer. ‘Oh it could be so nice, growin’ old with you’ Sure, he knew they wouldn’t grow old together. They were only in high school, and Eddie knew they weren’t truly in love, or at least he wasn’t. That’s why Eddie didn’t really take the playlist all too seriously. Just kind of putting what he could think of at the time onto the cd. Even if he was in love, they’re only 18. Making any commitment to anyone at his age was irresponsible. He still had to go to college and find out exactly where he was going in life before he tried dragging someone into it forever. He pulled up to her house and she was already waiting on her porch. She rushed into the car and pecked his cheek. “Awh, you’re listening to the playlist you made me. How sweet” She clicked in her seatbelt and Eddie began driving in the direction of the school. “Hey babe, I-I’m not feeling too good, can we skip school?” She pleaded. “I mean you can, I can turn around and drop you off at home, but I really need to go to school.” She pouted, “but I want my boyfriend to take care of me. Please? Have someone send you the notes.” He looked at her briefly and sighed, she didn’t look sick at all, but she’d probably be angry if he didn’t eventually give in, “Can’t someone take care of you at home?” “Nobody’s home to babe. Please? Pretty please? I’ll give you anything you want.” “Fine. Let’s go.” He turned the car around and back in the direction of his house, where his strange morning was about to become the worst day of his life.

———

Tag list: @rheddie @clamcrabcocklekaworu @i-dont-floss @gazebos-are-bullshit @ghoulishkaspbrak @bcckybeaver @richiexeds @isamarneedstosleep @but-no-homo-bro @majestic-phan7 @penvelynn @shqipshqip @beepibeeprichie

#reddie #stenbrough #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #beverly marsh #ben hanscom #mike hanlon #bill denbrough #stan uris #it (2017)#sam fic

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