#fear the fatness of the vampiress

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Ufff, I 200% have to go with the prompt and go with Rietta or a Pokemon gal (since all the asks you have been getting about them are just fantastic hahahaha) for the rip or the suck in a chair

Furiously hissing and squeaking, Rietta’s tiny fists whaled on the arm rests of the chair she’d been given: a chair that had been built for someone of normal height in mind. A chair that had been built for someone taller that she still had managed to get herself stuck on! Her hips feebly tried to buck against the evil piece of furniture that had trapped her, the vampire’s “super strength” failing her miserably as those leathery wings batted at the devious chair. “Damnit!” 

The attempt only lasted for a few more minutes before Rietta finally slowed to a halt, settling for merely glaring at the inanimate object instead. She’d find a way to get out of the damn thing... One that didn’t involve her “busting out of the chair with her fat ass”, if she had any say in the matter. 

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💟 Rietta or Bonnie for the Valentine's ask meme maybe?

Rietta: “Bah, that day of ‘love’? All I want is something that’s nice and worth my time, with someone who’ll show me respect and a pleasant experience. But seeing as how that’s short in supply... Anything that wouldn’t make me want to tear my wings off; with a free buffet offered up to me at the end of our time together, obviously.”

Bonnie: “Uhhh... I guess a cutie to enjoy the day with? I dunno what people do for that holiday besides... chocolate? So, give me a cutie who has chocolates who knows how to treat a horse gal good! Yeah? Yeah, that’d be good, nonny!”

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Celeste pats her fellow vampire on the head. A return for when she did it a while back.

Initially flinching at the movement and instead expecting a fist to be brought down upon her head, a smidgen of relief washed through Rietta at the gentle contact; swiftly being replaced by a flash of contempt at being stroked like a mere dog! With an indignant huff and a leer, she shifted out of the taller vampire’s reach, pointed ears flicking out of annoyance. Not only was she currently outsized, but research had proven that, yes, Celeste’s territory stretched out much farther than the manor that she called home did... A fact that would’ve made things go much smoother, had she properly been aware.

“I see that you’ve found me,” Rietta quietly hissed, her gaze never faltering as pools of red beamed against pools of red. She’d hoped that her trail had been covered enough to delay this meeting seeing as... The first—and what she has hoped to be the last—meeting of theirs involved the shorter woman dashing away with burning shame and regret. “Was the petting because I, Rietta Vink, have been a ‘good girl’, Celestia, or are you simply showing off?” questioningly snarked Rietta, fangs flashing out of instinct.

Knowing that she’d rather be beaten than kneel without a proper fight, Miss Vink crossed her arms over her not as ample chest with a huff, glare unfaltering. That simple little pat on the head might’ve been a forewarning for what was to come; something embarrassing in return for that foolish slap she’d delivered to Celeste’s softer rear. Why she’d even thought that acting upon a spur of instincts, rage and jealously was a “genius” idea still escaped her, yet now didn’t seem to be the time to think about her life’s decisions. Now, Rietta needed to find out whether or not her property—or worse, her life—was at stake at the hands of the vampiric lord.

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Aside from her ample middle, does Rietta gain in other places more than in others? (Butt, breasts, arms, wings?)

Rietta’s wings do indeed swell up with fat once she hits a certain weight! Her chest does grow a bit slowly compared to the rest of her, since a top heavy shortstack does no good; meaning that, yes, she is a bit bottom heavy.

I would say that there’s usually a part in her gaining where she LOOKS like she’s pear shaped... but that’s likely before she just ends up rounding out.

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So does Reitta have the weirder Vampire weakness like can cross flowing water can only transform at dawn and dusk?

What happened to your punctuation anon... are you okay?

But also what, no? She can’t transform; she’s not the sorta “mega vampire” who can easily afflicte the vampire status onto normal monsters and folks.

Stakes and holy weapons though? Well of course they’re going to kill her if she’s not careful, THEY’RE STILL WEAPONS AND THAT VAMPIRE BLUBBER CAN ONLY DO SO MUCH.

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So does Rietta give off like bastard cat energy? Like slowly does something annoying while making eye contact?

Canon Rietta does, yes. She will mock you viciously and then act all sweet about it...maybe. You most certainly ain’t getting an apology out of her.

Because, I’ll admit this: she does not fall under all those fake weaknesses that the media has played up despite my friend having several vampires who DO. She will mock other worldly vampires in broad daylight, sitting out in the sun and happily enjoying something loaded with garlic...

Oh, she also is supposed to have feral bastard cat energy too.

This woman will root through your fridge to eat all your food in the middle of, hiss at you when you turn on the light and then flee into the shadows to go after the rest of the edible stuff you’ve got around your home. Because she’s sweet like that <3

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Perhaps folks haven’t been all too interested with lil’ miss shortstack vampire Rietta because she’s not too tiddy focused and does not fill the niche of “big titty goth gf”

But why would you rather NOT have a goth gf at all when you can have a 3’8” BIG TUMMY gothicc vampire gf?

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🎈🎈🎈🎈 To your Vampiress

“Oh, are you kidding me?!” Rietta hissed in fury as her stomach began to swell up before her very eyes. Her body began to swell instantly, her limbs turgid, her cheeks rounding out whilst her fingers puffed up to uselessness. Barely even a minute in, her inflated form’s circumference had passed up her height, legs sinking in as everything started to rounden out. 

Though, was it really a surprise when the little vampire ended up taking a nigh-spherical form, the only distinguishing features of her figure left being curves and bumps that one wouldn’t think of comparing to that of a humanoid’s. Her rage only contained by her immobility, Rietta squeaked in fury at the tautness of her form, wings flapping uselessly as she rocked. 

Hopefully, she’d deflate soon enough... if not, then she’d simply have to endure being a vampiric blimp. 

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🎈 For your vampiress muse

Rietta’s sensitive ears couldn’t ignore the sudden hissing, swiftly glancing around in an attempt to find the source of it: only for her eyes to widen in shock as stared down at herself, her stomach slowly starting to rounden out.

“W-What the hell?!” The vampire hissed in return, surprise quickly replaced by rage at the prospect of bloating like some disgusting tick. “Stop it, damnit!” Her fingers went to grab at her stomach in a vain attempt to stop the puffing, glaring daggers at the offending body part. The situation was far beyond her power, however, as she fell forwards, landing on the air-packed gut.

Rietta viciously thrashed her limbs about for as long as she could, only to find them slowly turning comical and harder to bend. Angry squawks, chirps and hisses continued to come from her, soon becoming furious squeaks as her cheeks swelled up like the rest of her.

Soon enough, the little woman had been blown up like a beach ball, rounder than as she was tall and puffier than a parade balloon. Unable to properly cast her rage upon anyone, she’d glare at the ceiling in anger; insult was added to injury, causing her to bob against it in some form of cruel mockery. If she ever found out who was the cause of this, they’d be drained as fast as her vampiric body would allow.

No one turnt Rietta Vink into a goddamn miniature blimp and got away with it!

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Instant Fill 500 gallons of blood for you vampiress

Rietta scanned over the ask before her scowl deepened, an outraged hiss leaving her throat as her little fists balled up. 

“I at least measure how much I intake to prevent myself from killing someone who’s not deserving of it: where the hell would someone even get five hundred gallons of blood?! Humans are only supposed to have one-point-five gallons of it! What would you have done to get that, drain a damn whale?! And what do you mean ‘you vampiress’. My name is Rietta Vink, goddess damnit!”

“Hmph... Why should I even bother myself with something like this?” Leering furiously, Rietta crossed her arms over her chest whilst beginning to stalk away. Forget trying to stomach something as insane as that: she’d rather be pumped full of chocolate than waste that amount of people! Which, speaking of... Perhaps bingeing some of the wonderful sweet would help clear the migraine that was starting to brew. It’d be more of a comfort than hearing what 

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A vampiress breaking into a blood bank, now when she tries to fly people think shes the moon

“As if I’d even attempt such a thing! I get my blood fresh and order out when need be. No one will be seeing MY ass when I fly, you fool.”

But no really, this is absolutely an amazing idea. 👀

Granted, I feel that it works for both inflation and weight gain too, so... unf, AMAZING STUFF.

Because, well, inflation with liquids that aren’t water is a VERY fun concept to me...

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Is it easy to make Rietta blush or no?

“No. No matter what your attempts at getting me to be ‘flustered and blushing’ might be, you’re not going to see me blush. The only red that you’ll be seeing on my face will be blood.” The little vampire smirked, proudly baring her fangs and cackling cruelly.

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So is Rietta actually scary or is it like she trys to be scary but people think shes cute?

*tries.

Canon Rietta could very much be scary if cared about that, because she’s not exactly as “dummy fat and defenseless” as she is on here.

Her wings are large ‘n powerful enough where she can get off the ground and her “cute little thick thighs and arms” still have enough power behind them to rend flesh and get her close enough to poke some holes into someone’s neck or face. She IS a monster AND a bat after all. Also she knows magic, that’s like, normal human does not win in this scenario.

Also people don’t think she’s cute: they think she’s a smug little binch who’s at punting size.

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No I meant like transform into a bat or a wolf, like in the original Dtacula book

Dracula. Dracula, anon.

Also, again, no. Rietta’s stuck in her pudgy humanoid form with bat wings and echolocation. She does act a bit more batty than what people would expect, but that’s because I like my monsters weird and not just rehashed humans who are boring and are just humans but “not”.

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So is Rietta responsible for something hostorical?

For earth stuff? No.

In my ocverse? Kind of a no there too. She kinda just... has a rich family history ‘n thus became a rich, fifty year old asshole who still looks kinda young and isn’t hip and up to date with the world.

She does make damn good chocolates though ‘n knows how to cook rather well... which, you’ll likely have to pay for if she doesn’t like ya.

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So out of all your OCs which one has the most meme knowledge?

In general? Kinda all of them except for some outliers. Monsters (and four humans) plus memes equals some odd stuff... as well as memes humans wouldn’t get.

Here? Bonnie, if only because the repetitive memes helps aid her bimbo mind... also because music is power and she likes to repeat all the funny songs she hears.

Rietta would, however, would pick up one or two of them if she actually found some she could enjoy.